Church proyect...

Client: we want our logo in our new website

Me: ok no problem just give me the....

Client: but we dont want ppl to be able to download it.

Me: excuse me but that is not posible cuz...

Client: where is your faith! Nothing is imposible.

Me: proceed to stare in disbelief....

- Girl: I don't understand how some people can be so foolish and decide to study computer science.

- Me: Hm, true. So what did you study?

- Girl: Tourism and sports science. And you?

- Me: Nothing. I'm a truck driver.

Needs to be 2am.. else nothing gets done!

click click...

*reload*
_________________
| |
| This will be wra|
| |
|_________________|

hm.....

ah...

*hits ctrl+s*
*smiling*
*reloads*

_________________
| |
| This will be wra|
| |
|_________________|

what the f..
..
..
hm....
hm....

aha
ctrl+alt+t
*confidentiality*
sudo sublime /opt/htdocs/learning_css/wrapping_text.html

********
o.O but my code ....it's here.....but why wasn't it showing....

*just to be safe*
ctrl+s
*reload*

_________________
| |
| This will be wra|
| |
|_________________|

meh..... what was I thinking

*wastes time restarting xampp*
*searches CSS everywhere*
*steals working code*
*eyes red as hell*
*it's 3 am*
*after 1hr*

*accidentally reloads*

_________________
| |
| This will be |
| wrapped |
|_________________|

o.O
*blinking in confusion*
what the .... how did it work....
I changed nothing.....

*realises*

*Runs program*

*Nothing happens, no error messages*

Oh boy, this is gonna be fun. A bug with no symptoms.

Don't tell them to run "rm -rf /" as root. That's too nice. There might be inodes left on the hard drive.

MAKE IT WORSE:

"cat /dev/zero > /dev/sda" as root.

LEAVE NOTHING.

Two weeks ago:
customer - we need a small website, nothing special. Give us your cheapest option
*proceeds and give them the cheapeast offer, the accept and deploy their site*

Today:
I "notice" a spike in trafic, 20k request / second, and many sessions had 60-70 MB (big videos on the site) in size which cause the gateway to die and almost killed the entire hosting platform.

"Nothing special" turns out to be a website for a big campaign that they are currently running on TV, Radio, Paper and AdWord.

School holidays be like:

"Yea! I finally have time to do projects that I like!"

When school starts again:

"How dafuq did I manage to do absolutely nothing in the past month?!?!"

Every time I code, my programmer boyfriend has to be near me. Why, you may ask? Because this happens too often:

me: *yells bf name*, why does this not work?????
bf: here, lemme see
*code mysteriously works when bf comes to see*
bf: what, theres nothing wrong with that
me:

You are the CSS to my HTML,
You make my life so beautiful.

You are the JavaScript to my code,
You make my life to be so dynamic and full of life.

You are the OS in my life,
Without you, am useless

You are the C: to my brain,
Without you am nothing.

You are the stack overflow to my problems,
I run to you for solutions.

To be continued.....

Today I was hired to pentest a company's framework. While getting directions on what needs to be tested I counted 4times the sentence:
"We are a multi-awarded company for our security, virtually nothing gets past our firewalls".

Most of the PCs had Win98

Although I know it's nothing, the irony is real.

My room is connected to the power group together with 5 other people.

Watching a mass surveillance documentary.

Suddenly my power goes out, the rest stays on.

I know it must be a glitch in the newly installed power management system but damn the timing couldn't be better!

Me: "If today's demo to the client goes well,i will get my first cheque"
My server:"If today i stop working,it will be great"
Android Studio: "If i force a gradle update,it will be just fine".

*crying*
Fuuuuuck.Why nothing goes my way when I want it to????Whhhhyyyyy??

What’s the point in a fucking package tracking system when it hardly updates anything?!

Ordered my phone last Wednesday and got an update saying that it was going to be picked up by dhl soon.

Nothing new until today: it’ll be delivered Wednesday.

So you literally go from the first to last status in two updates, what’s the fucking point?

🤬

Me: Browsing the security of a website.

Tell the website developer that they are using the SHA-1 hashing algorithm for encrypting the credentials of it's registered users.

Them: Yeah, so what?

Me: You shouldn't be using an algorithm which was exploited years ago in the age of 2016.

Them: Don't worry, nothing will happen.

Me: *facepalm*

Too fast.

And it's not a good thing.

While we start to think that we get a hang of something, there is new thing coming out.

Result is nobody knowing anything well, nothing is developed properly.

Hardwares, languages, frameworks, methodologies. Everything is going too fast.

Or may be I'm just a slow sloth.

People on github opening issues saying shit like "aye, your extension crashes. Please fix or I'll uninstall. Thanks.". How am I supposed to fix an error I know nothing about? Error message? Extension list? Stack trace? Steps to reproduce? Nope. Nothing.

Don't be like this, please.

Just found a stackoverflow thread that had no answer and 2 comments. Here are the comments:

Person 1: Did you find a solution for this?
Author: Yes, please email me [...@gmail.com].

Bruh, what's wrong with some people???? Writing nothing at all would be better then that

HOD: Hey, Can you conduct web development workshop for Jr.'s?

Me: no issue, Can you share syllabus?

HOD: download from the internet.

Me: cool, So may also be trained them related to GitHub.

HOD: what is GitHub?

Me: -_- nothing its little thing, I will manage.

Me:( before vacation ) plans a schedule , decides to be productive.
.
.
.
Me: (during vacation) sleeping all time, doing nothing productive.

Huh! my sad story !

Don't be stressed about day-to-day challenges/problems. They'll mean nothing in one year or even one month. But the health damage caused by stress will stay with you.

*opens DevRant*

*sees Meme about how bad language xy is*

*closes DevRant*

Is there nothing else one can laugh about? Does it always have to be hate? Well... it's about rants, but at least hate your own language. Not others for theirs. That's their job. Amen.

Use Linux desktop they said.
It'll be fun they said.
So much to configure.
Such fun.

18 hours later and hibernation, Bluetooth, Sound and Nvidia Optimus still not working after countless modprobes and config changes.

Hello again, Windows. You make me feel safe.

I'll just stick to Linux on servers and nothing more.

I AM GOING TO PERSONALLY MURDER WHICHEVER SHITBRAINED INCOMPETENT MONKEY THOUGHT IT'D BE A GOOD IDEA TO RESPOND TO ANY AND ALL API ERRORS BY SENDING A RESPONSE WITH THE STATUS CODE 200 AND A BODY OF THE FUCKING STRING "error" AND NOTHING ELSE

WHY?!!?!?!??!

That awful realisation that your job could so easily be done remotely from your desk at home while wearing nothing but underpants and eating pop tarts.

I'm 21 today 😦, I'm up at 1 in the morning programming.

I'd still rather be on a PC on my birthday... Though to be far I did go out all weekend with my mates got absolutely hammered... I got punched by a girl in the face (I did nothing I swear) among... Other things

Future holds big things.

Its real.. sometimes I really hate programming when I stuck at some where.. suddenly everything will be ok and then I will feel like , there is nothing better than programming.

OH. FUCK. OFF.

Really?? A *gaming browser*??

What a sorry attempt at grabbing your first 10 users, Opera. There's a lot of "gaming" gear out there that's nothing more than a double-price gimmick with RGB lights, but this takes the cake.

Absolutely ridiculous. You should be ashamed for making such an abomination.

Our client is so stupid that they are currently paying for 9 devs to sit on their asses doing basically nothing just so they can guarantee that said devs will be available just in case they need something changed at the last minute.

There are many ways of development...
Test Driven Development.
Behaviour Driven Development.
Acceptance-Test Driven Development.
YOLO Driven Development.

But nothing in this world is so frustrating as...
Buzzword Driven Development.

As soon as your managers spot a new technology, it needs to be integrated...
For fucks sake... New is not always better.

I'm planning on making a start-up. The brand name will be 'Void'. And motto:l is 'Because Nothing is Better Than Something'. I'm not kidding.

Just want to know if that's a good idea 😂😂

Christmas eve!

Challenging myself to write an automatic youtube-music-library updating script/engine within an evening/night.

'you should be with your loved ones!" - I'm nearly always home alone during at least the first Christmas day doing nothing than what I do every workday so I'm all good.

Guy: - Why the hell do you keep adding new tests with "TDD" in the commit log? Is this because you're wearing this stupid TDD t-shirt!? You're only supposed to maintain this! There's nothing to develop! Nothing here will ever be test-driven!

Cprn: (turns around)

T-shirt: *Technical Debt Development*

i am a procrastinating asshole. woke up at 7am to do some work, and still, 5 hours later - nothing! i am so pissed of at myself right now. i just want to jump out of my skin and not be me anymore. fuck.

Getting paid for doing nothing. Working only on my personal projects. Making a useless JS Framework that every company uses. Learning how to exit vim.

Okay, the last one may be kind of impossible.

Some of y'all are way too intense. Smoke some weed or something man shit. Y'all be acting passionate over nothing. Breathe in, breathe out

>be me
>be excited for secret santa
>buys gift
>the guy who got my gift is happy :)
>wait till the end of the day
>no gift for me :/
>leave office with nothing to be excited about
>reach home
>get to know about steam winter sale
>buy games to the point of happiness ;-;

10/10 would worship gaben ;~;

I can assure you there's nothing agile about an all day meeting that definitely doesn't require every dev to be there. Industry is weird.

After having spent countless hours of my life in tech, enough hours to be years..

I can safely say:

No technology will ever beat the frustration that is having to deal with people.

Code might be horrible, work might be an endeavour at times. But NOTHING..NOTHING beats having to deal with customers that are rude, impolite, disrespectful..downright abusive at times, condescending et.c.

It becomes this gnawing sensation that never just goes away..the first ones don't matter, after a couple of months you get gripes but bite down.. sometimes it just makes you feel psychotic.

and all you can do is laugh about it.

I don't have a problem with tech, I have a problem with the nature of people.

Applies for Android Internship

Supervisor: Work with this Image Processing Library to "RECOGNIZE" objects from the phones camera.

Me: Wuuuuuh....?

Supervisor: Also it should be in real time and can't use internet.

Me: But that's impossible....

Supervisor: Align your goals with the company's goal. Nothing is impossible......(gets all motivational)

Me: 😩🔫

Am i the only one who is so sensitive about indentation? It really pisses me off when i see code with bad levels of indentation because it completely overtakes my years of programming experience and i understand nothing. Also indentation level should be 4, not 2. Who the hell uses 2 level indentation, you don't deserve a keyboard.

Use to have a client, annoying as fuck, nothing was right for him and the worst thing: IE user :O Anyways...finished the project hoped never to see him again...

Today he walks in my office: "Just got news we'll be working together again"

FML!

Oh boy. Gotta love having a team member (For a School project) be in charge of the Database functionality/design, who has almost no communication skills and basically no clue about how to store data in a data base.
Im talking dates stored as varchar(5), column sizes being way way to small, overall table design being rather terrible, no primary/foreign keys, pretty much... Actually no, everything was being stored as a varchar.
Not only that, but there was a hell lot of data that needed to be stored that wasn't even accounted for in the DB design. He made some code that could be used by our team members for queries, creating tables, inserting data (etc), almost 2,000 lines of it.... And basically nothing was fucking documented at all. I'm talking comments like "Insert data into cities table" and nothing else. More complicated functions had as much, or less documentation. Complete mess.

*be me
* Design a website
* Boss comes in*
* Mmm smth off *
* Me discretely changes nothing, ctrl+S it
* Page reloads
* Boss : looks perfect

Wife and I went to visit her grandparents and when we were at the hotel she would watch lifetime and i would code.

As for Christmas, there's nothing else to do in this town so why not code.

Sooooo.. Aws's route53 and ELB outage nuked all our environments. 503 here, 503 there, 5xx everywhere.

Just sitting and picking nose for we've got nothing else to do now.. Who on the fucking earth thought it might be a great idea to centralize the whole fucking internet into 3 companies' hands!?!

How's your day?

It feels SO good to have nothing to lose on your system! Code on GitHub, pictures on an external disk, documents on Google Drive and OneDrive and bookmarks etc. on my Google Account. If my PC were to crash completely then I wouldn't be as lost as I'd normally be :D

What is it with over qualified, over certified consultants that go around spouting "best practises", and then come delivery time, have the most absurd bullshit that a junior with 3 weeks of knowledge in a particular subject would know what you just served up is nothing more then a pile of shit that will not be deployed even if your livelihood depended on it.

... Monday gonna be fun!

“You have a Jira?”
“You need a Jira, first”
“Open a Jira”
“You need a Jira for that too”
“That Jira is on the wrong board, plus you need to email _this_ form first”
Jira, Jira, Jira-fucking-jira, AAAHHHHHHHHHHH, STOP!

My job appears to be nothing more than an abstraction layer around Jira. A leaky abstraction

Yesterday someone from my class asked me if I could hack a netflix account for him because his one-month trial will be over soon.

I have nothing more to say.

What do we have to give you to make you able to accurately predict the scope and length of time it will take you to develop something you know nothing about and have no experience with? How hard could it possibly be? You click a button and BOOM! A unicorn! Please provide estimate in hrs EOD.

Today we moved a lot of stuff from one server to another and nothing broke!
Today was a great day!!!
Tomorrow might be a bad day though...

Nothing is ever more depressing than finally being able to install your preferred game engine using Wine only to be held back by being unable to install .NET 3.5 on Wine 3.0 :'-(

Leaving work with no bugs in the code! Everything works flawlessly!
Coming back the next day and all of a sudden nothing works and we need to spend the whole day getting it to work as well as it did yesterday.
There seems to be programming gnomes, ruining our code at nights!

Nothing like taking a company IT security training that requires Flash.

The first step to be able to run the training?
Override your browser's security setting to allow Flash to be able to run.

Anyone else see the irony here?

My boss knows nothing about development. JUST buzzwords.

*in regards to a project* Boss: "just write it in PHP; it'll be easy!"

Me: "you know PHP?"

Boss (fully serious): "...enough to be dangerous."

He has never written a line of code in his life, let alone has any clue about what PHP does. Whenever I want to fuel my rage, I think about this moment.

My manager's boss just commited on a delivery date a month from now. We dont know what is to be delivered, nor does the client. We are supposed to work on a platform that we know nothing about. And of course the catchphrase is : yeah just use big data and spark. I'm dying...

I remember when I first started programming and used to be scared of classes. I was thinking about it after I wrote several today like it was nothing.

Call at 5am, meeting in the office at 5.15am, leave office at 5.30am on route to airport because the customer doesn't know how to use the system. It turned out to be nothing :/

You have to be really dumb to hire someone and have them do nothing the whole week, it's a complete waste of money. I got some tasks friday 8 am and i was done by 10:30. That's incompetence to lead.

Nothing ticks me off faster than non working websites or apps of big companies.

For example how can it be that the Lufthansa app has no offline support for ticket stuff and loads like all their requests worldwide would be handled by one raspberry pi A...
YOU GOT THE MONEY SO GET THIS SHIT DONE

Another day, another time exporting svgs from Figma, sizing them, and exporting them to png into our app as the developer.

But no, I get it, what designers do is extremely taxing on the brain and any additional steps must be excruciating! Let me do anything that requires even the lowest of double-digit IQ! After all, I'm your local resident full stack clown™️!

🤡

Why the hell do so many Android games require internet? I want to play it in undergound when I have nothing better to do! If I had Internet I could be doing something usefull instead of playing stupid games! Even devRant survives by caching in the stations and doesn't f***ing close whenever I'm offline!

I've never been hacked - not that I know of :D - and never "hacked" someone else.
(Sure, I did some things in high school to circumvent certain restrictions but nothing worth mentioning whatsoever.)

But all these rants that I read so far have me wondering if I shouldn't simply setup a honeypot sometime when I'm about to be really bored just to have some fun. Then again, I don't have time to be bored. :/

nothing will be done, because nothing is clearly defined

lol

🤡

So I found some weird library included in this legacy code, didn't really get what it does and why it's there though.

Turns out there's nothing to be found on the internet about it. Absolutely nothing.

So after browsing through the directory structure a bit more I discover a README file. Hoping for answers I opened it, only to find this...

The blocking feature is working nicely for me :D i love not reading the absolute horseshit posted by attention seeking fucktards that have nothing better to do than to be loud and whiny for extarnal shit.

:D

I was about to announce that I would do that shit for free(again) :D

Last night I dreamed that I figured out a new complicated computer language... it was the best feeling until I woke up and realized it didn’t exist and all that work was for nothing!! Why can’t dreams be more productive?!

This is driving me nuts. Anyone know of this malware or whatever shit it is? Every now and then ads pop up. Usually in the launcher, but sometimes also in other apps. It'd be nice to get rid of... Usually when I look in the activity manager theres nothing, but this time I managed to capture it.

Just been interviewed by 3 people that have nothing to do with the role I'd be doing. So, that was fun.

I swear why is it always the loudly calling people going into the silent coupe while the rest of the train is literally completely empty. How can you be so smooth brained that you can't read the huge ass sign on the window where it says "SILENT". Nothing can make me more angry

Me: ok let's actually start work on a project when I get home. Something small that I can finish, bin and be happy with, just need to clone my assets repo...

*Types command, nothing happens*

Hmmm that's strange, opens router config and sees it syncing at 0Mbps

*Mad World starts playing*

Well, today was a fun day playing with Qubes OS. I really did nothing really difficult, I created a template for multimedia pruposes (Netflix, Amazon Prime, Spotify and VLC) based on debian and then create a domain based on that same template.

It works

Still need to fix the screen tearing, but it is nothing really serious, in fact I probably just change the graphic card to the integrated on the motherboard to see if something change.

Probably the next issue will be set a few domains for specific issues:

- Dev [personal]: This will be used for my personal projects.
- Dev [non personal]: For those times I collab with someone / not my stuff
- [√] Work: mail, msTeams, whatever from my job.
- Bank Stuff: I can asure you that
- [√] Multimedia: chill n stuff

and thats all for now.

PD: Ctrl + C, Ctrl + V Will be a nightmare xD

I found this question on EmguCV's forum that matches my exact issue.

First answer: Never mind - all. I answered it myself.

Welp. Thanks for nothing. How fucking difficult can it be to post your solution to the issue?

Poor fellas. I feel what you're going through.

Look how spontaneous they were in mentioning the workaround part. Be vocal even if you have nothing to offer. 🤷🏻‍♀️

All things have ends. Nothing lasts
If I am currently sad, this situation will pass.
If I am currently happy, this situation will pass too.

If there is a bug, boss like shit.. it'll pass, it doesn't deserve to be that sad ans depressed..

If there is no bug, and the work is perfect.. it'll pass.. there will be moments when sadness come..

it's just everything is going, nothing deserves to be sad or that happy.

3M used to make sticky notes. Now they make composite helicopter armor as well.

When you need to pivot your startup, do it. There is nothing to be ashamed of.

Been working from 8 am til 7:30 pm, no breaks. Programming is awesome, fun and feels good in my brain (addictive ^^). But man its good to be home and do nothing. ~ sweet ~

>Be me
>Decide to contribute to an open source project for the first time
> Nothing big, just a simple compile error fix
>Make first ever pull request
>Over weekend pull request accepted
>feelsgoodman.jpg
>Take a look at recent commits
>Module I tweaked was finished in a commit 6 hours ago
>Fix no longer relevant

So close.. :(

People who assign vague tasks to you, without any context or anything remotely resembling a brief, for a project you know almost nothing about. And then expect you to be able to magically work out what they're actually wanting. Whilst demanding ridiculous turnaround times. I mean, are you fucking serious?

How to be more productive at morning? Just get alert from PagerDuty that one of core app running out of space and there is nothing you can delete. Call me Speedy Gonzalez

Nothing fancy just one laptop, although will be getting another screen soon

There is nothing more permanent, than a temporary solution.

*could be a repost*

Hey devRant! It's been a long time, but I'm baaack! I know you missed me, but my life has been so eventful, and difficult, and so I am here for sympathy and recognition of my status among my fellow devRant community, because like, I'm basically a legend now, I'm sure you've all heard of me!

Did I mention I'm back!? I know right, it's mad, it's like the place hasn't been the same without me. What has changed? Man, I remember when devRant was a toddler colouring in my walls with crayon, man those were the days...

Oh, have any of you seen @OtherLongtimeUser about, are they still alive? Come on guy, we were like best buddies, and your existence validates my sense of self-worth in relation to my status on this here community. You about?

Anyway, life's been hard, I'm sure you're all desperate to hear about it... Looking forward to you asking me about it in the comments so that I can skirt around the answer for you whilst still trying to extract the maximum amount of sympathy. But yea, just tell me you've missed me, that'd be fantastic.

Also, I bet the banter on here isn't like it used to be. All you n00bs missed so much. But hey, did I mention, I'm baaaaack!? ✌

1. Nothing lasts forever and you always need to be prepared for change.

That might be technology acquired by other company and dropped completely by all of people or new technology take over the market for a year and is gone after that and no one remember about it.

2. If you go opposite way then all of people around you that might be actually the best way.

That learned me to always look around for new stuff cause this small stuff that people make today can be big company next day just cause they got annoyed by things and start something new.

3. Trust nothing that you see.

Bugs are everywhere

4. Quality and speed doesn’t matter when you start doing something but consistency matters a lot.

When you start doing something you suck and you need to be ok with fact that you’re going to make lots of stupid mistakes and learn from them.
When you start new prototype you don’t need dozen tools to finish it, you don’t need performance or perfection, you need consistency to finish it.

Good luck

HLSL, you little fucker

The bug I was searching for, for a few days now turns out to be a packed uint accidentally stored into a float variable

Not a single peep from the compiler, nothing

It doesn't even have warning flags like -Wconversion

What the fuck. Why microsoft. WHYYY

Mainly for freelancers: Don't be afraid to take on projects you know nothing about. You can learn whilst doing the job, plus you're getting paid for it.

So me and my friend started doing a video game project. To be honest I was expecting it to be nothing but pain and suffer.
But it turned out to be really fun experience for both of us (plus I’m learning Unity) 😁

I thought I was never going to be anything in life because there was nothing that I was good at. Then I started "web school" and it just clicked. I was good at it and I understood it. Finished with an A :) now I love my job as a front-end developer.

I should be working. I am so far behind with both homework and my game.

*Does nothing but watch youtube videos all day*

I'm lazy. I barely work on my game anymore and procrastinate with all of my HW. Pretty sure Youtube has my soul.

Me at promotion interview (modtly a formality) last year

Q: why do you want to be promoted?
Me: so that when I say something, people (team mates) will take me more seriously

Now: either nothing has changed or I'm getting ignored even more

Spent hours troubleshooting an internal app that had zero logging today. It would just terminate, no exceptions, no feedback to the debugger, NOTHING.

Turned out to be the damn corporate virus scanner blocking "malicious" behaviour. Good thing my desk is so heavy or I woulda flipped it...

I'm a tech lead for a new agile project for a manager who knows nothing about agile. Having to work on a chart that shows exactly how many sprints each milestone will be and when it will complete for like, 17 sprints from now when requirements aren't even set. Wtf?

Man fuuuuuuck, there's nothing more frustrating and scary than fucking up a local git repo. Because you know for a fact you won't be able to restore it

And I even had god damn backups of the .git folder. But reverting leaves me with more files than I started with fuuuck

If you were to teach others a last thing before you die, what would you say?

Id tell my surroundings to use time efficiently. We only have like 800.000h, assuming that we become 100 yo. thats nothing.

Please dont make jokes, id really like this to be an informative thread

In C# using "this."

WHY? It doesn't help with readability. It just clutters up the code and adds nothing.

It should never be a required prefix.

What makes it worse is, Visual Studio greys it out because its not required!

Then there is stylecop. This got enabled on our project which generated 3000 build errors because of missing "this."

So today I started working on a code base someone else wrote and stubled across this and thought it was worth sharing.

Why somebody would be doing something like this is beyond my understanding.

Not commenting on the empty catch block keep in mind the whole snippet has nothing to do with rest of the code...

WHY!!!!!?!?!?!?!

Maybe it's just me, but taking dev work from a little side gig to a salaried career is more difficult than I thought it'd be. Soooo many applications going out with nothing back, recruiters ghosting...maybe it's just a bad time for jobs in general but good lord is it exhausting and stressing me the hell out.

My boss creates so many wtf moments with his total tech "un-savyness", although he is the " lead" dev, that I'm getting worried that I might be doing the biggest wtf faces every time ... I can't pretend like nothing is happening anymore .... Fuck!

!rant

I think the auto driving cars are going to be an all or nothing system to work. Either everybody has one or it'll be near impossible to have it.

Your thoughts, comments, concerns?

Anyone else feel this 50/50 male/female work melarky is just silly. Most programmers are men. It shouldn't be more complex then that. Most beautitions are women. Nothing wrong with work being gender dominated... imo

This is it.. this might be the app that I can quit my day job with and just work on nothing but personal projects...

I say about every app ever.

Wireless printers are evil...

Mom's computer: Page with useless print on, then blank pages, then nothing.
My computer: Nothing
E-mail to printer: Printer says there's no paper. Wrong format?
Print from phone using wifi-direct (after realizing the automatic mode for this does NOTHING): Manual mode gives me confirmation box for connection on printer at least... "connecting..." one minute later connection times out.

Somehow using a wireless printer just never comes without some pain. And always when I have other stuff I should be doing...

My grade in basic programming course went from B to C, determined by a fu****g semi colon! One damn semicolon!!!

Bare in mind that my digital exam was in NOTEPAD with no IDE, no syntax highligting, nothing but black on white!

Is there really any compilator, or realistic job environment, where this could be so devestating?!?!

So I finished writing that GetSet.JS micro-library lol. I'm about to put it on GitHub.

It's nothing special; it's pretty useless, actually. But it's my first JS library, lol!

I'll probably be using it all the time though. It removes a lot of the mundanity of checking if an element exists before assigning a value to it.

It's 3am, I have exams next week and I don't know nothing. It will be great.

NOTHING FUCKING WORKS OMG.

I WANT YOU TO RUN EVERY FUCKING 15 MINUTES, IS THAT SO FUCKING HARD? THE ONLY THING THAT'S GOING TO BE HARD AROUND HERE, IS ME!

Geez, all I am trying to do is to run a php script every 15 minutes, and literally every solution I have tried has failed...

Every bad recruiter ever...

---

Hello {name},

I recently came across your CV and {empty compliment}.

Would you be interested in me making 20-40% commission on your yearly salary for doing next to nothing other than make you miserable in 3-6 months time by promising the world and delivering nothing?.

Look forward to making money off you...

{recruiter},
Super Mega Uber Extreme Ltd.

---

Seriously, fuck bad recruiters...

If you touch me without my consent, I won't fight you. Instead, I'll be there for you, at your home, at night, wearing nothing but a cheaply made papier-mâché Shrek mask, in all my five-inch glory, with a cheese grater, telling you that you, my friend, are like an onion, that you have layers

If I had a nickel every time the unit tests failed not because something was wrong in the code, but because someone had messed up the unit test I'd be able to retire early.

I just spent the better part of 10 hours hunting down a bug in some production code only for the test to be wrong because the person who wrote it had mocked the http response incorrectly.

Nothing I did to "fix" the code worked, because nothing was wrong with it...

When leaving for the day on my last day in the company.
I thought what I learned here? nothing technical except how to survive the politics, backstabber, betrayal, blame game and getting used.

I wish it could be added as skills in CV.

"I’m convinced that without bad design, the world would be a far less stimulating place; we would have nothing to marvel over and nothing to be nostalgic about." - Carrie Phillips

when your boss wants to be at 9 am in the office for absolutely nothing

laters Microsoft.

Well been on PopOS for my laptop for about 4 months and hell I have had OS killing problems and nothing and I mean nothing made me think let's go back to Windows.

So it's official, Windows is slowly getting it's holes bricked up as I am done.

I don't have the tools I used on Windows for making my desktop apps but all my modding tools and well PHP can be done on anything so hey I am all good.

If you like Windows then enjoy your spyware you have that right.

I just migrated Test data into Production. If I start a new project, Murphy's law indicates that my phone will ring, and the migration will have been a total loss.

If I sit and do nothing, Murphy's corollary tells me the data migration will be a success?

WHY DONT I GET FUCKING FIRED. I BEG TO GET FIRED. PLEASE FUCKING FIRE ME U DIPSHITS IM NOT EVEN DOING A GOOD JOB HERE AND IM NOT LEARNING ANYTHING USEFUL. HOW CAN A FUCKING DEVOPS JOB BE TO 24/7 CONSTANTLY RUN LINUX COMMANDS AND LITERALLY NOTHING ELSE HELLO????

Is there any sense in using git for a personal project of which I'm the sole dev? Just as a way to learn version control and such, or is it nothing like what it would be as a larger team?

When a fellow programmer/teammate, who tends to be a little to extroverted for my tastes, decides he had nothing to do for the last hour and wants to come talk. An hour and a half later it finally makes sense to just call it a day.

Just what the fuck is up with the senior devs in my team? Just because it's my first job as a developer doesn't mean I can't be right at times. Why can't they fucking digest that they could be wrong at times and me trying to tell them what could be improved is just for the product and has nothing to do with their egoistic selves.

Finally found a way to deploy my Docker image to my VPS with nothing else than GitlabCI. My CI/CD system will soon be perfect.

[ Heavy breathing ]

So...

Just searched for *.io websites... thought there'll be somehow interesting things - eeeh... nothing incredible 😴
More or less just abusive usage... 🤓

But one site - beefree.io - is about an email editor for responsive mails. And I don't know why (someone really needs that - over 1.000.000 users as stated on their site) ... but there is nothing that doesn't exist.

Weird world.

Why do people hate jQuery so much? 30KB is basically nothing in times of modern bandwidth and for me CSS selectors are mich more readable than the Vanilla JS functions.
Im not judging and would be happy if someone explains it to me or shows better alternatives.

I have this bad habit of starting projects that are way out of my league after getting ridiculously over-ambitious ideas.

”Yeah, let me just do this <insert ambitious project in an area of programming I know next to nothing about> with <insert languge I’ve never written a line with before>. It’ll be fine...”

So, I was fixing some code today, and stumbled upon this. Is it just me, or is this really an example of bad bad practice...? And, no, there was nothing to be executed after this function was called.

when you see this in the code of a senior programer

if(0){
all sort of things;
}

or just like

if($var == $tmp){
do nothing
}

if i would have done this in college i wouldnt be programming today...

time zone shift.

Am I the only one whos's inner clock seems to go absolutely crazy...

Might be due to my health issues, but whenever these one hour time shifts happen - trouble sleeping starts again, feeling sluggish and blue and nothing seems to work.

I hope it doesn't take long to readjust, cause today was completely unproductive

Today I’ve done nothing related to software development or coding.

You can do it too!

This will be my LinkedIn post, of course with a selfie in gym gear✌🏻

If you see my post scrolling, come on bring them thousands of likes😬

I truly hate PHP because I know nothing about it. I thought writing an API would be cool and it was until PHP stopped cooperating. Why won't my API communicate with my app WTF!? It's like it's not even there even though Apache is clearly serving the page.

Learn enough about 2D animation and game design to be able to make an RPG/interactive visualization of my favorite album.

(I currently know nothing about this lol.... so yeah ambitious)

Hey guys so we need to start taking accessibility seriously, it’s the law - right now we currently do nothing.

So let’s start with something super simple. Alt text has to be provided for an image...

“This is all bollocks let’s be honest”

😳🤦🏻‍♂️

Um...so I don’t make the rules, the W3C define the standards for the web. Disabled users matter...

Well finished work yesterday at the company where I would be grilled over whether it was safe to run an SQL script on the server using the command line but they thought nothing of everyone having to log in to the server as root!

Some days I can't get over the cynical gnawing outlook that everything is shit and nothing gets better and it's all down hill, thats theres no real future for any of us, no stability or careers that won't vanish or be replaced or outsourced. That the entire economy in the west runs on fraud and lackyism and bullshit and a revolving door of never ending hype and marketing.

Somedays I feel like I'm just waiting to get old and die.

Maybe this cynicism and pessimism is born from a period I went through from 2008 when I was just turning 18 to 2013 when I lived with my parents and went through several shit jobs where I was essentially disposable. But the entire situation and the bad start in life has left me with a gut feeling that nothing really matters and it all can vanish over night or be taken away.

Sorry to be a downer, just some days I can't see what the point is.

It must be good to at least know computer networking?! I remember nothing about these TCP, UDP, whatever the fudge protocol shite. I don't remember these megabit and megabyte things. All I do is code from one end to another. Anyone else watched Eli The Computer Guy's series?

Might be good news, maybe not.

And.co was bought by Fiverr and the platform's software was made completely free.

I'm suspicious of Fiverr and every other freelancing platform out there, and am wondering what's the whole point of buying a SaaS and letting people get its services for 'nothing' in return.

Have you guys ever hated your job but stuck around because the money was just too good? I keep hoping the grass will be greener eventually but I’m starting to think it’s not going to be.

Also I constantly say to myself that nothing is worth more than your mental health but then that pay check comes in and it keeps me going for another two weeks. Gah! I hate this

the word bug has lost all meaning to me because all issues in the repo are labelled "bug"

That being said, the best bugs I fix are the ones where i can say its IEs fault and theres nothing i can do so i dont have to do anything because IE will never be updated

First thing Monday morning, get a group text about our upcoming release. Boss says there's nothing important, nothing to release, we can maybe skip.

I just busted my ass last week implementing things that need to be released this week. Good to know the rest of my team have been doing nothing productive for the last month.

1. Use all my vacation days
2. Learn something that has nothing to do with computers (seriously I bore myself sometimes in conversation)
3. Drink more rum and learn about it at the same time
4. Make time for friends and family
5. No massive outages!

Mostly I want to step out of work and be more sociable

Trying to look busy.

I'm so done just telling my boss I'm bored and there's nothing to do. He gives me something meaningless to do because I'm salary so my 40 hours has to be full of something.

I really wouldn't mind doing 50 or 60 hour weeks if there was shit to do but there's just not.

The longer I live, the longer I am unsure what the meaning of my life is.

TLDR; 42

Yes I am a creative person in a way that I can create something out of nothing, but unfortunately all my work is almost invisible. Is the meaning of a developer guy to be a magician? He does something and *wooosh*
//magic happens here
there is a thing which he forgot how it works within a month. Why can't I just talk about my work with other people than those from the IT business? I don't think to be that important, but sometimes it appears that without you and me nothing will really work nowadays.

And to be honest with you guys, I am too slow. I can adapt new concepts and new programming languages, but I feel like getting overruned by all that new stuff appearing each day. Am I supposed to be that super hero named"superbrain"? Is that still healthy?

wtf, my life is a miracle, an oracle and a hurricane (and some times it is even great)!

I am confused!

Me: *Starts to code for uni assignment*
Puts ANY sort of music in the background => hours of coding go by, beautifully.
Tries to code without music due to broken headphones => 5 min feels like an eternity and nothing makes sense...
I swear, "my headphones broke" should be a valid reason for an extension.

Aight I’m new to this thing but it’s cool. I’m good with basically nothing but python and pygame. I know HTML and CSS but that doesn’t even count. Welp if someone want to work on something with me to motivate me to learn something be my guest I need help

Despite all the code bugs, manager worries, colleagues' annoyances, self pity, low self esteem, constant guilt all the way, we are still alive and kicking

I guess 2022 will be nothing different but I also wish it will be super interesting and satisfying

Wish You And Your Families a Very Happy New Year 2022!

Hotfix asap. Hotfix still in progress.

An ehancement that also needs the hotfix to be release at live in two days. One day for pre-live testing, and another for live testing.

I pray that nothing else will break.

I love 2:30 am support calls, especially for a system I know nearly nothing about and when I'm supposed to be 4th in line for a call.

Hopefully I made the right decision. Now let's see if I can fall back asleep.

RANT
SO FKING BORED. ALL TICKETS ARE CLOSED, NOTHING IN TRELLO. SITTING IDLE IS THE FUCKING DIFFICULT THING TO DO. IF I WILL NOT GET AN ISSUE ASSIGNED TO ME SOON THEN THERE WILL BE BLOOD SHED EVERYWHERE.

SO . . . my laptop just decided to no longer be a computer. And while I love boxes that have stickers on them and offer nothing else in terms of functionality, I should probably be able to code. And watch cat videos on YouTube. So . . . anyone ever bought a refurbished computer on Groupon?

Sitting around all day getting nothing important done and complaining about not having anything useful to do.

Guess what I am supposed to be doing now?

Anyone else notice that there is a decent set of super dickbag senior devs that help nothing and use every meeting as a soapbox session? Dafuq? Why be so condescending and rude... For the purpose of feeling intelligent? Us lowly Dev I's don't have any say in the current processes. Fuck off douchewalls.

Not much tops the orgasm from powering thru 500+ lines of code in the zone... in vim...no debugger.. and without compiling just visually seeing in your mind the assembly be generated... and code being stepped thru.. and then compile and test and everything works as expected.. not sure anything tops that feeling ... definitely have to be in the zone.. one distraction and boom gotta compile to make sure nothing broke

Can you picture what will be?
This is the end, my only friend.
I'll never look into your eyes again.
Paint me red, and scalp me free.
Nothing else matters to me but me.

A world of sickos, filled with fright,
Too afraid to live tonight.

Nothing in this world is loved,
You live in a palace of lies.

Bet you thought this was Kaine or Kiki!

I wish we could stop to push candidates to do TDD or even asking questions about it during interview. This thing is a lie, has always been and will ever be. It is cool for small coding exercises but nothing else.
Let’s stop gatekeeping with stupid concepts.

Nothing is safe these days.
Not even Safe is safe is you are not careful.
Be careful "online".

Urgh clients, it doesn't work ? Ok how bout you tell me the error that's causing it and I might be able to help

All I get is it does nothing 😐

And you think I can diagnose a problem that apparently does nothing, from at least 10miles away with no remote desktop 😞

So I rush to job just to find a power outage on the building , don't know if I should be happy to have "nothing" to do or be sad cause I have a lot to do but can't 😓

To me, the single biggest coding distraction is other coding, i.e. When there are more things to work on than there are developers and priority changes on a whim. My runner's up would be people who come to you directly for non-urgent matters disregarding that you're busy. The third would be meetings, but I consider meetings to be a necessary evil. Almost nothing is worse than too little communication and the resulting mismatch in expectations.

!rant

Gotta start learn react. Only two frontends in my company know react and it seems my Vue knowledge don't mean nothing... I'm kind of excited, mainly because for a long time I wanted to make mobile apps and with react native I'll be able to do so.

when the company you work for is trying to be down with the kids, there is nothing more cringe worthy than the marketing moron using #pokemongo in every tweet.

To be fair, I don't have my degree yet (just two more semesters...) but I'm working as a dev second year now and studying is really nothing compared to real-world experience. Yeah, I know I haven't said nothing new.

Designer: The web design muset be beautiful, clean and follow modern trends.
Me: Actualy no, design should be just functional part of website. There is no need to be beautiful, clean and has nothing to do with modern graphic trends. Sad truth is almost nobody, besides css galleries, cares.
Designer:

Only in React packages...

When you follow the documentation to the exact dot and you get an error and nothing works.

And the stack trace gives you an error coming out of some deep async call, made many calls before the error.

Therefore the stack trace has nothing to tell you.

Equivalent of a brick falling on your head, just bad luck, who said programming should be deterministic anyway...

"The API will be ready soon", but it comes in late and nothing like the agreed upon spec.

So, I decided last week to give VIM and Emacs a try, for no other reason than I can.

I found emacs a bit clunky, but VIM is actually starting to grow on me.

Can anyone recommend some good sites where I can learn about configuring vim, nothing major, but setting different indents for different languages would be handy.

"I for one absolutely and unequivocally refuse to be bullied about by a thing’s capacity to absorb light. There is nothing less appealing than a color fraught with meaning – the very notion is boisterous, inappropriate, and marked by the dreariest sort of longing." - Fran Lebowitz

Work on projects that produce something that solves one of my existing problems.

Also dev environment matters. One of those hackers desk setups would be fine. Nothing too fancy, just need a functional one.

I want to use the DevRant community for a Unit test.

Inspired by Memento, I will make a tattoo ... but ... I want it encrypted. I know nothing about encryption.

I want to make some encrypted messages and I want you guys to decrypt them.

If I'm gonna put something on my wrist for life, it should be secure

At this point, I feel so far from tech and programming so nothing is exciting anymore, although, I'm working as a "software engineer".

Every job feels deadend and requires nothing but absolute mundane skills. I mean "make the text bigger"-joke does not come out of thin air. No science, engineering, and little-to-no standards are involved in most jobs.

This leads us to this: you can get excited about rust, fp, extra dazzling clean code, uncle Bob's sect of salvation coders or whatever but you'll be hit with reality so don't get your hopes up.

Popular opinion: AI is nothing more than complicated algorithms that no one appreciated before and probably never will. 99.9% of all coding would be AI if mainstream media had their way.

This has nothing to do with AI but -

Fuck AI !!
Fuck OpenAI !!
Fuck Sam Altman !!
Fuck the whole AI ecosystem !!
Fuck anyone who said AI will replace devs !!
Fuck all of those marketing fucks who said AI will be smarter than people.

And at the last but not the very least,

FUCK YOU if you like AI. Fuck off.

I seem to have this impressive ability, where I can manage to absolutely nothing for hours, and still be fine with it... I believe I need to be more productive, but I can't seem to find any reason to

!rant

Is there somewhere an overview article/guide on the most popular software associated with web development? There are just so many technologies I know nothing about - Gulp, Grunt, Docker, Webpack, Bower and who knows what else..

Everyone seems to be using something else and it's just total chaos for me.

Oracle database with PL/SQL, heavy use of triggers, and viewception.

Sure, let's take what's supposed to be a data store, embed shitloads of logic in it, make sure everything has side effects, and ensure nothing is ever straightforward.

Untracable, impossible to debug and overall a mess of epic proportions!

My preprocessor is just generalized kerning, the macros are variations on the single well-known proof for the Turing-completeness of GK, the type system will probably be a Prolog reskin so simple the translator can be a FSM, the type inference algo is the original HM algorithm which I don't even need to change, the core language is Lambda calculus and no more, and the backend might just be Erlang itself if my research confirms that extending LLVM until it consistently beats Erlang is unrealistic.

I invented nothing, I create nothing. All I do is plug circles into square holes and fill the gaps with play dough.

WTFFFFFFFFOMFG

Why is setting Java path so frustrating? My $JAVA_HOME is supposedly be in my /usr/lib/jvm/java-8-oracle directory but Nautilus shows up nothing!

It's like I'm head first inside the rabbit hole. Fuck

This awesome moment when you‘re late into your thesis, find a possible improvement that would require new measurements, but then find out that this improvement can‘t be done with your constraints and there is nothing to do❤️

(Random, but probably can be rant/story)

Me: *responds nothing*
The AI: "I think you're probably right. :("
...
Me: "Bruh"
The AI: "I know, I know. I just want to know."

(Yes, it does type the sad face)

Decisions, decisions, decisions

- Asus ZenBook
- Dell XPS
- ThinkPad X1 Carbon

Going to be programming, running Ubuntu nothing too power intensive but want the power there if need be. Plus I do love a solid build and keyboard. Thoughts?

The problem with college is that it makes you feel like it's the be-all, end-all of learning. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you want to succeed, you must never, ever stop learning.

By Boss insists to do branch merge in a Skype meeting after work time.. he has nothing to do with development but he insists to be with us and lead the procedure..
He thinks this is how Devops works..

I went too fast for Monday, now I have nothing left for the week

This is going to be a rough one

WTF, Rust. You are so fucking hard to write, and TBH, your docs are not understandable. Please writte your docs to be understandable, and make it fun to read, like golang does.

WTF, Rust. I am now looking, for 5 hours straight, for a solution for reading stdin into a variable. Nothing. 6 fucking solutions for 6 different rust versions of which not one works. Nothing is readable. Explain the philosophy of you language! What the hell is this?! Is your language based on the C family? On which is it based?! fucking idiots

1. Closed a solution.
2. Opened same solution, other branch.
3. "Get Latest" on the whole solution.
4. Build solution => Build errors (probably because some project needed be built before another).
5. Right-clicked a project => Build.
6. Nothing happened and VS2017 became completely unresponsive. Has been like that for like 10+ minutes now.
Nice? Nej, bajs.

"Sorry, but nothing in this MR is as it should be (I don't even know where to start) - all you do here is waste scarce CI resources"

Much helpful. Such wow. Teach me how to make such toxic and useless merge request comments.

When it comes to using XCode, I can’t be the only one who thinks it’s a stupidly large file. Took a whole day to download, I know having a WiFi speed of 20Mb/s isn’t great but on a brand new iMac with nothing else installed you’d except it to download and install pretty quickly.

Also what is it with the Mac and things not wanting to be full screen??

A new year, a new job.

After a years hard graft learning front end code I finally landed my first dev job!

Even though the job is a while away, there will be nothing stopping me getting there and learning all I can in this industry.

#bosh

So had a plan to do a gamejam this week seeing I had nothing planned after work but nooooooooooooooo of course everything I could ever need to do decides it needs to be done this week -.-

It's what I get for being excited I guess :-(

Complaints about how FE rendering is so slow when BE apis take forever to return. Working on performance projects and feel like you've done nothing at all at the end of each day.

Devrant lost it content, cuz there is nothing more to complain about. Everyone has already told their story. So normies come to fill the void. People who know nothing about technology except getting likes. Mostly with lame to mediocore posts that are rather far fetched in order to be called dev related.
Also a lot of good ppl seem to vanish over time. AlexDeLarge, Alice, Jase, Linuxxxx (thou he's back for now) and dfox/trogus.
Looks like we are soon going to hit a devrant depression.