Manager: Hey, this is Junior. he will work with you from now on.
Me: Oh cool, we could use some help.
(moments later...)
Junior: Hey i got this error. Im new with this engine. sorry.
Me: It cool, then you should read the documentation first. its all there. including your error.
Junior: whats documentation?
Me: ...

For all the cunts ever existed! what do they teach to programmers in college these days?!

I’ve been inspired by programming many times, but a few early moments really stand out for me. Some of those most memorable early moments came when I developed Flash games with my friend in high school.

Growing up, at this point in time, around 2005, Flash games were really hot. All the kids in my school played games on addictinggames.com during any classes that took place in the computer lab, and when my friend and I started making games, it was our dream to get a game featured on addictinggames.com.

When one of our early games ended up getting featured, we were absolutely ecstatic and I’ll never forget the feeling of seeing our own work on this game website that we loved for years prior and that so manly people at our school used. It was the coolest thing and I think went a long way to encouraging me to continue to want to create things, after seeing the impact we were able to make with a simple game (as two high school students).

And I think that shows the beauty of the internet today and the power people with few resources have to get stuff out there. I think it’s maybe gotten harder as of late since there’s probably more competition, but I also think the audience is ever-growing and I hope many more people get to experience that awesome feeling of having something you worked hard on become popular.

Most embarrassing dev moments:
Many years ago before I knew anything about javascript minification, I opened a .min.js file and thought "wow the guy who wrote this must be insanely smart"

It has been a long day... 😐

When I was an intern, I wrote a very heavy MySQL query with multiple joins. Quite frustrated, I asked for some help from one of my seniors.

He came by on my desk and told me, "Explain your query!".

I was completely blank-faced O_O.

After a few moments, the senior grabbed this hopeless bastard's keyboard and typed "EXPLAIN" in the beginning of the query; and then ran it.

I thought he was being hard to me.

At work today.

Collegue: hey, if you continue like this, you'll be just like me in a year or so!
Me: as, so completely fucked up?
Boss: hahaha rekt!
C: okay gotta give you that one 🤣

Love those random moments :)

Sometimes, the rants are in perfect alignment. I live for these moments.

Also a big “fuck you” to whoever decided under any circumstance holding the power button down on a computer case meant anything other than shut this mother fucker all the way down and try the fuck again.

Gahhh. When I hold the power button I don’t what you to sleep, I want you to die! I’m electronically smothering your bitch ass. When I’m holding down the power button to restart, the computer should feel like it’s being waterboarded! Like these may be it’s last moments on Earth if it doesn’t act right and get in compliance! No it’s not nap time, it’s time to shut up or shut down...forever!

School principal : P / Me : M / Interviewer over Skype : S

P. I recently heard you run a software club in our school.
M. Yes. (started from March)
P. Well, one software community seems that he found you somewhere, and asked me if we can do a quick interview.
M. Sure. What is it?
P. So he will connect to skype.
M. Let's start then...

*A few moments later...*
M. Wwwwhhhhaaaaattttttt?
P. Calm down! What's the problem?
M. How can I have more than 5 years of android development?
S. Ok. Recorded. Next question.
M. (uhhh)
*A few moments later...*
M. What? Why in the heck do I use subversion?........
Yes... Ah... Ummm....
No! Why should i make a gui client for subversion?
*A few moments later...*
S. Do you have hacking experience?
M. Of what? I know hacking is illegal here..
S. Like... Anything!
M. Do YOU have an experience?
S. Yup.
M. What?
S. Google.
M. How?
S. (silence) Ok. Let's move on.
M. (wtf is this guy)
*A few moments later...*
S. Okay. We were about to hire you but you didnt met our job requirements.
M. ......What? What was the job?
S. Web developer Intern
M. I got no questions regarding "web".
S. I know devs should be great at all things.
M. Shut the hell up. What company are you?
S. (says something)
M. (Searches in google) Doesnt come in search results.
S. Where did you searched it? (trembling voice)
M. (Searches in naver, search engine of korea) Nothing. Are you sure you are a company?
S. (ends call)

Hate these fake interviews. And i have no idea how they found my school
I never wrote my school anywhere.

Me: *Playing around with bash on Windows*

Friend: Can you hack my Facebook account?

Me: I already did...

*moments of awkward silence*

Business analyst and client, best "are you kidding" moments

Colleague (lets call him john) does this sometimes at the moments you least expect it, funny as hell:

random colleague: *walks towards john* hey john, do you have a second?
John: *face turns dead serious/scared* h-h-how do you know my name? 😶
Colleague: hahaha, nice try, I've got this server issu...
John: Who are you? Get away from me 😶
*everyone laughing*
*johns face turns normal again*
John: what's up mate? *biggest goddamn smile ever*

This is not a rant. This is one of the several "aww" moments I've had with a chatbot I had made which I integrated with Telegram Bot API yesterday.

Client's message: "The next feature we're going to implement is blah blah blah."

Me (to my manager): "Lol it can't be done. It's impossible. We're bound by technical limitations. I've done plenty of research on this."

*2 hours later*

Me: "Here, I've built a demo of the feature. We can deploy it in a couple of days."

One of the proudest moments in life!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂

You guys ever spent a longer period of time on finding a bug and once you found it, first go grab a coffee/snack to allow that bug some final moments?

Like some sick kind of power play along the lines of “I will fix you at a time and location of my choosing”

Those "oh, this actually worked?... Nice!" - moments

I have spent 20 minutes explaining to a contractor how to stage a file in git and what a filepath is.

It's moments like this where I stop worrying about my job security

Noob moments #0
The first time you try to pronounce nginx

Socially comfortable nerds are hands down the rarest and the most supreme beings on the planet.

Hello

Im drunk

And i love you all!

*browses devRant*
*closes devrant*
*looks at screen wallpaper for few moments*
*opens devRant, starts scrolling*
*wait I've read these rants*
.
.
.
.
*ookie I better go sleep then*

>>Gets email about a social issue and completely disagree with the organization that sends email.
>>clicks unsubscribe and puts "I didn't sign up for this" as the reason why.
>>2 days later get another email from the exact same place
>>clicks unsubscribe and types "Listen here you victim playing fuckers. I told you to unsubscribe from this email list because I don't want to receive emails from your bullshit organization. Fuck you."
>>Gets a confirmation email that my name has been removed moments later.

Moral of the story: Strong language gets the job done.

A child is deleting all the necessary files required to run games, softwares etc.. He thinks they're virus just because he can't open and play with them.
Now he clicked on game.exe to play his favourite game but this happened:
"Error: blah blah
xyz file is missing"

He is confused. He is blaming his father for buying the worst computer for him

This child is me, 8 yrs ago :')

60 additions, 120 deletions and the code runs even better now. I love moments like this.

Wife: "How hard is to make a phone app?"

Me: "Depends on what it is, why?"

Wife: "I had an idea for a cool app that does blah blah blah"

Me: "That actually sounds like a cool app. Let's brainstorm tonight and come up with a plan and see if we need to hire some freelance devs for it"

Wife: "Cool, I also want to make an app to blahblah2, oh and one to blahblah3.. oh hmm what about.."

<facepalm>

Met a girl who was into computer hardware...
She told me that she's been thinking about starting to code...
As a first, I introduced her to Devrant.
*A few moments later*
Her: Wow!
*A golden halo appears on my head*

Old man's tale. It's true.

Like 12 years ago, I was working in a small town computer store.

One day, a really ugly woman came in and asked for data recovery since she could not boot up her PC anymore.

We recovered her data, and just to make sure it was all "working", we randomly checked a few directories for files.

We have found some photos of her.
Her and a bottle of Coke.
Let me put it this way: she loves coke bottles. A lot.

There are things that can't be unseen, and moments you still remember after 12 years. Like the moment she came in to get her stuff - and you need to pretend to be all business while you're almost pissing your pants.

Good days :)

So many moments like this working on the legacy code at work

Oh my fucking god. This blessed feeling when your code finally works and you can remove all those fucking breakpoints and move on.
These are the moments I became a programmer for

Girl: hello this is amazon support center, hope you're feeling great today, how are you?

Me: im good...

Girl: glad to hear that, how may i help you?

Me: a few moments ago i was on... sigh, actually im not good im extremely sad right now because i was scammed on my amazon account for $250, im calling to ask if that product can be charged back.

*literally 30-60 seconds of silence*

Me: .....hello??

Girl: ok sir ill give u another line to call please dont hang up ok? stay with me

Me: maam im not doing suici

Girl: +1-532...

Me: ...

The moments when you grow the most as a person are those where you have a big axe in your hand, ready to shout through the office WHICH OF YOU LOWLY SPERMSLURPING JERKS FORGOT TO WRITE A FUCKING TEST FOR THIS METHOD

...only to see your own name appear in git blame.

I have my best moments but the first time I felt badass about computers was when I was at kindergarten.

There was one computer with one cool game with skateboard. I wanted to play but the other kids didn’t let me.

I thought that if it look like I fix the computer they will let me. I took me month or little more but I made shutdown bat(I didn’t really understood fully) and I added it to the game shortcut from usb.

One of the other kids started the game and the computer turned itself off. Hi tried a few times and then I offered to fix it, I created new shortcut replacing the “hacked” one and the game ran.

From that moment the computer and the game were always free for me.

Pair programming with boss, on my computer...
me: $: ls -la
Boss: "use ls -lah"
me: $: ls -lah
A few moments later...
me: $: ls -la
Boss: "Why don't you use ls -lah?!"
me: "My note, my rules"

That moment that you need something but your skillset isn't good enough to make it and your time is too limited to learn it.

I fucking hate those moments.

One of my fav moments in Futurama

That moment when your non dev friends are talking about V8 engine, and it takes you a few moments to realize they are talking about cars.

(Meeting with Client)
Client: The script you sent us is broken... It can't run... We can't test now. (Their supervisor even insinuated that I did that on purpose :/ What?!)
Asked for logs, googled for solutions. Moments later.
Client: Oh it's our server's problem.
:/

You got to love / hate those moments

So my friend, who owns a restaurant, asked me over 6 months ago, if i could redesign his homepage. I told him "sure why not" and since we're friends i didn't want him to pay me any money.

He told me what his thoughts about the design were and i told him that i needed the menu, some decent pictures of the restaurant, the "about us" story and the credentials to the server.

He didn't know the credentials to his server and i told him to ask the person, who made that page to send me the information i needed, but he kept on saying "could you call her because blah blah". Well, i did but she couldn't give me that info without asking the owner. So i met him and told him "hey i told you so, because it's completely normal not give sensible information to unknown people and besides that she told me to tell you that you should give her a call, because she hasn't got your new phone number". Two months later i got an email with the credentials, but still no menu and no pictures.

Four days ago i made a transition page, because i didn't want to publish the page with stock images and without menu, so i wrote him again whether he wanted design #1 or #2. Got a text at ~21:00 saying "design 2, but you need to publish it at 22:00".

I mean wtf?! He assured me he would call some people he knows to get those things. I told him, that it would be free, because of our friendship, but no support from him and he keeps stressing?! He knows i've got a full-time job and my studies going on, so my time is really limited and he keeps fking around like that?! Man it pisses me really off...

Real Linux fuck up coming up.

Be me.
Working on a project.

Accidentally used sudo with git pull, every file now is only accessible for root users.

Thinking to myself.. okay I'll just do chmod 777 to the current directory

Forgot how to use chmod
At first something like
Sudo chmod ./ 777

Not working
Maybe
Sudo chmod / 777

Not working
Remembering that it's the other way around

sudo chmod 777 /

Now... I fucked up. I forgot the dot, and for a sec I forgot that '/' means root directory and not current like './' does.

Few moments later the permission system of Ubuntu is utterly fucked. Everything is not working.

Need sudo in order to fix everything but sudo isn't working.

Few hours of crying later,I solved it thanks to some nice ppl online helping stupid people like me who used that command...😂

I simply hope no one bashes my head against the wall for this for this...

I don't like coffee!

There, the words spilled out of my mouth! I simply don't like coffee.

I remember the first time I drank coffee, I was trying to study for finals. A few moments after my lips departed from the cup, I got a really bad headache and stomachache. How do you coffee lovers handle that?

Needless to say, that was simply not a pleasant night for me. I despise coffee and coffee despises me.

I guess my best AHHA moment was back when I learned that good code is simple code.

When I started out I wanted to prove myself by showing of how good of a programmer I was(and which I retrospectively wasn't) , which basically meant to use every high level concept I was aware of whenever possible. Multi threading where linear execution would have been totally okay, polymorphism with x meta classes where a switch would have been enough, all that shit.

It wasn't until I had to guide the first person through that mess of useless ego stroking that I found out how much time and money I wasted by not going with the easiest approach that solves the problem.

Took me some time to fully lay off that attitude but it surely was one of the most influential moments of my career.

Ever had one of those moments when sites run by cunts (fuck you CNET) autoplays videos at 200% volume?

Use the extension called "Silent Site Sound Blocker" to make sure only whitelisted websites can play sounds.

Fuck yeah!

Office manager sending a mail that all spaces now only have "sustainable vegan leather" furniture, "to carry responsibility for the planet and commit to a greener company image".

You mean you bought uncomfortable plastic chairs.

Vegan leather is just fucking plastic.

Not all plastics are bad, but in this case it's a very toxic plastic, a PVC softened with phtalates and stabilized with cadmium stearate, produced cheaply in a country with no regards for public health or the environment.

It's about as sustainable as munching down a vegan quinoa avocado salad in a private jet on a transatlantic flight.

There are moments where I'm glad that I'm still working from home, because I would have planted that ugly fucking desk chair straight into the equally ridiculous power-slurping hipster "sustainable vertical herb garden" with its 500 watt growlight bulbs.

I am not saying I trust 'the cloud' 100%, but having the freedom to wipe your phone, laptop, or pc at a moments notice without a second thought or worry is an incredible feeling.

I'm 18, asking my granddad a basic question. It was in danish, translation may not be as funny.

Me: Do you have a phone with a screen you can press?
Granddad: Yes
Few moments later...
Granddad: But i dont know if anything happens when i press it.

I know a lot of you already know/do this, but to those of you who don't - I know it has saved me more than once:

If you use SSMS (SQL Server Management Studio) - when connecting to a server, before you hit the "connect" button, under options, choose a color to represent which server you are connecting to. I personally use stoplight colors: red = prod, yellow = QA, green = dev....this way, it helps you realize what server you are connected to, minimizing our dreaded "oh shit" moments....lol

Hopefully this helps someone ☺

German autocorrect always changes "git" to "gut" (good). Lead to some funny moments. (Translation) "Clone the good stuff" or "There is nothing better then gut"

*Copies url from bitbucket*
*Switch to Slack on macOS*
*Presses command + v*
Slack: whaaaaaaaaaat :O I'm gonna freeze for few moments to understand what the fuck you just asked me to do

Those moments of pure sadness when you refractor a codebase

I hate having moments where you realize the bug was caused by a bug in the framework after scratching your head for hours......

I love those A HA! moments when I just GET something!

I just spent 3hours trying to make the simplest, barely 10lines python script work with no success.
I'm writing this rant from my bed where I gave up.
I love programming but moments like this I fear I'm not cut out for it and It hurts, the little self esteem I have left is on fire.

More moments of picking up someone else's project...

Those moments when your mind is thinking to code but you are tired and want to relax on weekend

Client: "The app moves slowly and has moments when it freezes! Why?"
Me: "Let me check the server...it has 5 GB of memory allocated for it and you are making it load 4.76 GB and never cleaned the log files..."
Client: "Then it should work fine! Almost 500 mb free, it`s a lot! Let the log files be there, we might need them in 5 years!"
Me: "What?..."

You know when somebody complains about a bug in your software at a meeting to everybody, you go to their office, find out that the bug is actually an user problem, and then on the next meeting, when asked about the bug the person reports "we fixed it" and you correct them, explaining in detail how there was nothing to fix because the problem was completely user driven?
I love these moments

!rant
Was explaining to my gf what a debug duck is, few moments later she came back with this

One of those "Fuck this shit, I'm outta here" moments! CEO, in a dying startup wants to go on a 5 day vacation to Mexico while I'm sitting here fixing production bugs! FUCK THIS SHIT BRUH

I was working on a site just moments ago and everything was fine. Then I move my laptop from my living room to my bedroom and on refreshing​ the page everything seems broken! Disorganized cards, and everything looks 10x bigger. I panic because I was supposed to deploy it on Thursday and I was just doing some final touches and angular has given me one hell of a time. I fucking rolled back all my commits to yesterday and cleared chromes chrome's cache....still nothing works. Then I realized there's a new button on my address tab and on clicking it is showed I had (accidentally) zoomed in by a fucking 175% when moving the laptop *facepalm*. On resetting it everything was ok. Now I have lost all of today's commits and my chrome cache. One box of tic-tacs down and I still can't overcome my rage... So I wrote this rant 😠😩😩
I need a stress ball😩😩

Things like this make me feel good about myself. Update: moments after taking this picture, he took it down. Have any of you ever asked a stupid question like that? And, well, how did you know you when you got "good" at programming?

Junior: I don't think the methodology you came up with is working.

Me: Why?

Junior: There's an exception when I ran it

Me: ...what exception

Junior: FileNotFoundError

Me: ......have you checked if the path to the file is correct?

Junior: No

(A few moments later)

Junior: Oh I forgot to decompress the zip. Nevermind.

Working on my Lenovo x1 carbon. Akku warning "less then 6%" appears. No problem, I will connect the cable just after I finished this function... "Will shutdown in a view moments" message appears. Ok, I connect the cable. Nothing happens. Maybe power adapter is broken or something more worst. Panic. Try to commit and push as fast as I can (around 2000 LOC from today, made big changes on my project today). While pushing to github laptop powers off. Fuck. Check github on smartphone to see if commits had been pushed. No. I do not have a power adapter for replacement. FML.

Sad story:
User : Hey , this interface seems quite nice
Me : Yeah, well I’m still working on it ; I still haven’t managed to workaround the data limit of the views so for the time limit I’ve set it to a couple of days

Few moments later

User : Why does it give me that it can’t connect to the data?
Me : what did you do ?
User : I tried viewing the last year of entries and compare it with this one

Few comas later

100476 errors generated
False cert authorization
Port closed
Server down
DDOS on its way

You realize you complain too much about shitty websites when even your wife, while surfing from her phone, begins saying "this website sucks"...

Funny moments... Or no

This is so deep that I had to revaluate how I make life decisions.

I've had quite a few of those moments with JavaScript.

Occasionally i got my badass moments at work.
But that one bachelor party in Barcelona where about 10 of my pals and I came back from a soccer match topped it all.

As we got back to our AirBnB apartment i went to the bathroom and scanned the WiFi.
I found the IP address of the bachelor's party man of honor and MITM attacked him.

So each image from any http server would automatically get swapped with a picture i took just an hour ago from the game we were at.

5 minutes later i hear the screams "OMFG WE ARE ALL ON THE NEWS GUYS!!!" and "LOOK AT SPORTS SITE X AND NEWS SITE Y!!"
The saga continued with some cheers in the beginning and some confusion, but ended when another friend rat on me..

But boy it was glorious 😂

Who has been gone through these moments..

Pathetic dev moments: Any time my macbook fans rev up, I worry that I'm working my baby too hard, so I start closing applications.

!rant
print("Hello World!")

Erm..... Here goes nothing.
Hello everyone, I'm [REDACTED] from [REDACTED] in the SEA region. I'm a highschool student, 17, with a hobby of programming in Python 3 as a self-taught trial-and-error script kiddy, mostly small scripts from random "Yea I should do that, how long will it take?! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯"-moments. I found DevRant while talking with people in a few programming Discord servers. Hope this is enough for a "Hello World!" post....and yea, welcome me to DevRant *pop confetti and hope not forced to clean up later*

On my first week in the internship, I have to create a small website and it has to be finished ASAP. So I used Bootstrap.

After finishing I tested the website in chrome debugger tools for every screen size (design responsiveness), it was working fine. My stupidity was that I haven't tested on actual mobile/tablet.

The site was live, I send the link to one of my friends and he said "why everything is so small? looks like I'm browsing on PC". I quickly grab my phone and visited the site and it was not responsive on mobile. Started to check the code again, tested again on chrome tools it was working. But not on mobile. Changed the bootstrap file but no fucking changes on mobile.

After few moments of thinking, I realized that I haven't included the "meta viewport" tag. I felt so stupid and it was kind of embarrassing for me.

Now I first include meta tags before working on new project.

Gotta love moments when you find legacy code like this :)

P.S. Yeah, that was the whole script, written by just one guy.

i kinda feel embarrassed all the time. i feel like it's never enough, i don't know enough, there's so much i don't know. i do enjoy my work and sometimes there are moments where i'm proud of what i've done, or these "i'm a fucking genious" moments when i solve a bug or a certain problem or when something finally works. but if i have to do something new, i tend to panic a bit, as long as i do not yet have a concrete solution in mind.
my perception contrasts with the feedback people give me, but even when i'm happy about the positive feedback, i tend to think to myself, "they're wrong, it's not that great"..

These rare moments when you realize:
"it's not a bug - IT IS a feature!" o_O

Not a rant but an awesome moment. I am in the kitchen enjoying my morning rant reading session and I hear my 13 year old listening to jazz in his room. I listen to 80s hair bands and he listens to jazz. Cool.

Got selected for an interview with a big internet giant.
Went there and was warmly greeted.
Thry asked to wait for a bit as my interviewer was busy with something.
Moments later a young beautiful lady entered the room. Her face was the most beautiful thing I've seen in my entire life. I was dumbstruck.
She then introduced herself and turns out she was my interviewer.
Everytime she asked me something I looked at her face and grinned stupidly.
Now even though I should feel bad about getting rejected, I am happy as fuck.

This message is to all cofounders/hr/etc. - please don't allow such beauties to take the interview. You might miss out an A grader.

The awkward moments when you've been laughing too much from most of these rants and your non programming friends wonder what's funny about them after showing them and trying to explain but they look at you all like...

Registered an account with a local pizza business and rated them 5* on Yell moments before checking my email and finding they had emailed me my unencrypted password, GREAT NOW I WON'T BE ABLE TO EAT

Don't you just love those "Aha!" moments?!

Good moments, dad and son.

/* A normal day at office */

// A non tech guy sitting next to me
// Wants to save a file on his system.
Him: Moves Cursor. Clicks File->Save.
Me: *facepalm*
<!-- moments later -->
// Time to save a file
Me: Ctrl-SSS
Runs code.
<!-- insert picture here -->
Me: Alt-TAB. Ctrl-Z. Ctrl-S.
Him: *sigh*

Do you get random nostalgic moments when you see things you saw as a child?

i sometimes put on the early Harry Potter movies, since they came out as I was reading the books as a child. They fucking work miracles for my mood. But that is just me.Currently watching Prisoner of Azkaban, my favorite one, as I work. Gives me warm feelings as much as the rest. The entire series is my favorite, regardless of things that were changed.

*explains the importance of official docs*

*moments later, the intern pointing at his screen to a crappy YouTube tutorial video*

Intern: How did he figure all this stuff out? He must be a genius.

Not co-worker, but class mate. Specifically, my group mate.
Boy, I could fill an entire book with the “what the fuck” moments.

Here, the prior question of his was “why is this happening?”

Damm those moments

Me and friend talking about a paper.

Friend: how much do you want me to read?

Me: readln

Friend: ???

Anyone else experiencing moments like 'you sit behind a computer all day, how hard can your job be?' or is it just me?? 🤔
I'm getting tired of this shit... Especially when it's comming from a person who relies ob tonns of apps to do their goddamn job.. :/
I'd get it if it was comming from a farmer who actually has to work hard to produce the food for us.. or any of the blue collars..but from white collars?!? Dafuck?! Yeah, I may not be the person writing the code for your precious little apps, but they're written by people just like me, who sit behind a computer all day & code.. :/
Show some respect ya cunts!!

When your manager casually mentions that you're(me) going to learn developing apps for iOS, when you obviously have a built in hate for Apple.

You just sit there thinking about how the fuck the situation escalated unexpectedly quick.

I think this is both a blessing and a curse for me.

Whenever I'm developing something, I ALWAYS keep coming up with new (good) feature ideas WHILE programming. Now, this isn't as bad because they enrich the software/service mostly but goddamn, it's so fucking annoying when I'm working on a certain function/feature and I change stuff three motherfucking trillion times before finishing it because I keep coming up with fifteen billion new ideas.

In the end it's all worth it but at some moments it gets really fucking annoying.

During my internship.
Got wonderful opportunity to present a project to a senior Director of a different team.
And just moments before meeting, my project stopped working.
Was a disaster.
Later came to know there were internal issues in the service I was using in my project.
Though not my fault, but during the meeting, I managed to show a video of the project.
Let me know if folks wants to know what happened later..

The only time I actually open Safari is during those debugging moments when I hope that all other browsers have just given up on me.

!dev rant, but dev company rant (if that makes sense)

<sarcasm>
I love my company's HR, she is such a wonderful and caring woman.
</sarcasm>

<rant>
'Breng' (a public transit company in the Netherlands) was on strike today, so I couldn't go to work. No problem I thought, I'll just work from home. So I send a screenshot to the HR where you could see that every train was canceled.

A few moments later I get a message back saying that I should wait for the next train (although you could see on the screenshot that said train was also canceled)

Now I finally have a train to go to work... After sitting an hour in the cold... And I already see the smile on her face when I arrive at work...
</rant>

<prayer>
Please trains keep driving so I can go home tonight...
</prayer>

Tfw you accidentally chmod'ed the entire root of your cloud server, because you've misplaced a "/".. Thank god, that there is such a thing called a 'backup'.

The amount of sweat and stress I had when the SSH disconnected and I couldn't log back in, the Apache and MySQL services that began to throw failures..

It's on moments like this, that you really appreciate the 24/7 customer-support! 😂

And all this while I was at my job, working for another company..

My app is moments away from getting deployed into production for the first time.

This is how I feel right now 😓

A toast to those moments when we solve programming problems we couldn't google answers to, cause we'll never find them.

Literally every single day.

I remember when I was dying to get in the field. Now that I am in I realized there are a lot of bleh moments.

Love my job tho, but shit ain't nearly as exciting as I thought it would be lol

Those little moments when you finish writing and refactoring the code and the result is elegant and just works

Client called with a query regarding her email client. Said to me during the conversation, "I've got yozzamite". Took me a few moments to realise that she meant Yosemite.

OMFG. Here's a self-rant for you all...

So, working on a JS library to build widgets, I five across some weird behaviour where I expect `$.ajax.apply()` to pass something to the chained `.done()` method, but it comes out differently.

Fuck. Right, time to visit StackOverflow and glean some knowledge.

I post a question, complete with examples and descriptions and a little midget unicorn in the corner for world peace.

Come back a bit later to see what's happened, and nobody understands my damn question!

So I proceed to debate a few points with some other devs, going back and forth for a while, but still nobody knows what I'm asking.

Fuck. Time for a JSFiddle...

Copy code from the jQuery docs and start modifying it to show what I was working with... Now suddenly is all working as the docs say.

O.o

So I go look back at my own code again to try work out what's actually going on.

Turns out I completely missed MY OWN CODE.

Fuck me.

I think my favorite MacBook Pro™ with touch bar feature is when I'm changing the volume while listening to music, and the bar bugs ou- ahem, decides that I actually want to listen at max volume, and proceeds to rape my ears.

If only Tim Cook were here, and would grace my humble existence by allowing me to pleasure him with my mouth. It is moments like these that make me feel truly blessed to be an Apple chosen one.

" What's the big deal ?
It's just an if condition right ? " - Every manager / product owner ever.

And all the devs be like #facepalm !

Updated an online profile on a jobsite this morning for a frontend job. Got called this afternoon:

Recruiter: “i have this great frontend opportunity for you. Are you interested and can i mail the vacancy over?”

Me: “yes i’m looking for something so mail it and i’ll get back at you”

A few moments later...

Recruiter mailed a backend function

This is why people don’t like to work with recruiters.

Life's sometimes just amazing.. like those moments when you do "rm -rf /var" instead of "rm -rf var" and your whole system gets full of errors / unexpected behavior and random crashes.. Since I have project deadline tomorrow, really dunno should I cry or laugh right now

The moments of life we live for are sometimes times that look like these. Gotta love em

"Gradle build finised in 647ms (moments ago)"

You sure @Android Studio? On Gatorade?

Home office moment #349: Holding a business meeting wearing nothing but your bluetooth headset.

Those moments when your app server is down and you restart everything and then somehow it is magically working again.

I'm watching tv with my parents. We're watching home alone and they're laughing their asses off from the movie they watched twenty times. This is one of the cringiest moments of my life. Wish I could attach an audio recording

Just randomly had a though from when I was in high school and one of my mates asked me why you would use try catch instead of an if statement...

You know those moments when you stand still, close your eyes, rub your temples and just exhale... Yeah one of those moments...

(Don't ask why this popped in my head, happened like 5 years ago ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

Sitting in class witch my Arch/BSD/Debian laptop and using CLI to connect my phone over bluetooth. A crowd of some classmates is passing by and starts asking: " Are you going to hack the school bell?/ WTH are you doing there, Freak?" There were many of those moments.

!rant

Moments when you realize how simply you can solve a problem that previously seemed dauntingly complex.

These are the moments I live for

Just don't open it...

Will definitely not pretend to be productive 24/7. But the below help me reach a satisfactory 8/5 most day's.
- Exercise in the morning
- Eat breakfast
- Listen to good music
- Make sure to have fun moments throughout the workday (++ for initiating)
- Catch air, have a walk, take a break
- Minimize interactions with toxic people
- Be open in sharing knowledge, thoughts, work , good people will repay you
- Get in the kitchen, cook nice healthy meals
- Set concrete and reachable targets
- Remain eager to learn
- Celebrate successes
- Spent time with friends and family
- Catch enough sleep

And above all, DON'T open devRant!!!

Last time, working on a project with two mates at school.

I'm the one who knows how to read and understand correctly a doc for low-level c libraries (portaudio, opus) and working on sockets.

I make the barebone of our server. Co-workers should work on socket client.

After a week, the socket client is ugly, and almost unusable.
I rewrite the socket client in two days.

Co-worker, for a week : "the only contribution of Orionss is deleting my code" (it wasn't the first time)

In these moments, I would like to kill this guy

Being distracted from despair for a couple moments.

"I hate this virtual world", deletes all the social media accounts

Some moments later...

Comes back and rants how this world is full of shit

Listening to chilling country music and learning whole new language at work after successful meeting. Life is worth living for such moments 😊

Happy New Year everyone 🦁🍾🎄🎁❤️❤️❤️

I know ive been a dickhead at times (or all the time) and will probably continue to be but thats because this app is like my personal psychotherapist. U guys are my therapists and i appreciate that.

Thanks for all the the moments. Looking forward to making more and new ones in this year ❤️

2024

It sucks to have memories assigned to specific sounds.

There are old songs that I love to listen to, but I keep thinking of heartbroken moments, the death of my grandma, my beautiful non-depressive childhood moments etc.

One method to avoid that is to listen to these songs again, but with "great" memories. That way it gets overwritten.

I may sound like a cry baby, but I had to let this one out of my soul to relieve myself in a strange way.

The CTO has admin on the git repo and while we all have to have 2 other people review our pull requests. This guy will just go make a pr and merge it without review. It's not like its perfect code either. I will be going behind him and finding weird shit that he did days later and then go check the git blame. Yup its another one of his had to push it right now without review moments.

Me being me:

*Me thinking about something*
*Unlocks phone*
*Goes to DevRant*
*Scrolls without reading*
TrollBrain: this is not DevRant
*Closes DevRant and opens it again*
... Wait what?

Them blank moments :/

I just finished writing an Integer Java Virtual Machine in C.
Being able to write an echo server in IJVM Assembly, connect to it through netcat and see it run on my machine is legitimately one of the most satisfying moments I've had so far in programming.

Being a sysadmin can be the most frustrating thing ever, but it's worth it for those moments when you feel like an absolute ninja.

Switched from single threaded gevent server to an nginx configuration, added ssl, and setup a reverse proxy to flask socketio, all with less than 10 minutes aggregate downtime. On the prod server. \o/

I've been wanting to ask this for a while now: How does everyone feel about imposter syndrome? Have you ever experienced these moments of finally getting the hang of something and then suddenly have it all smashed within a second?
How do you deal with it?

All things have ends. Nothing lasts
If I am currently sad, this situation will pass.
If I am currently happy, this situation will pass too.

If there is a bug, boss like shit.. it'll pass, it doesn't deserve to be that sad ans depressed..

If there is no bug, and the work is perfect.. it'll pass.. there will be moments when sadness come..

it's just everything is going, nothing deserves to be sad or that happy.

One of those "What the fuck am I doing?" moments.

When company invites to wiesn/octoberfest and every employe gets a beer and foot Flatrate. Thats one of those moments where i think "being programmer was the best decision in my life"

News headline:
Thief runs off with Galaxy Note 7 before it explodes moments later

I'm a dev and I like to rant

And who says it has to always be about Dev stuff ?

So!!! I ve spent 2 days as a junior dev and I feeel not well... 1) I am the worst dev in the company with no experience 2) brain-dead 3) feel like I wasted 2 days and learnt nothing, I guess in theory it's something but realistically I had no "it clicked" /pure genius /astounded myself / made major new brain connections moments

So what's going to happen now. ? When will I wake up? How do I wake up ?

My boss creates so many wtf moments with his total tech "un-savyness", although he is the " lead" dev, that I'm getting worried that I might be doing the biggest wtf faces every time ... I can't pretend like nothing is happening anymore .... Fuck!

My gods, fuck WordPress in the backend!
Why did my company decide on writing a data collection api with many dynamic pages on top of WordPress. It's a blog, not a wonder tool you dumbwits.
Never have I had more fuck this moments per hour..

A friend of mine just called me to ask if I can help him hack an Instagram account... In my head (He's quite aware I lost my dad less than a week ago even if I was an hacker I'll expect and respect some little remorse atleast around moments like this, I would not be expected to do dirty shit at these times). (*heavy sigh here*) (*Million cause words here*) (*hung up*)

So I have this idea of a potentially amazing idea but I'm so conflicted as to whether or not it is a good idea (I know it will probably never happen) but it's really hard to put it in writing for people's opinions and input on it...

Anyone else have these moments?

> Moment you thought you did a good job, but ended up failing
> Times the bug wasn't actually your fault
> Times you took the blame for a junior or other dev
> Times someone took the blame for you
> Times you got away with something you shouldn't have.
> Most valuable data loss
> The bug you never fixed
> Most satisfying bug to fix
> Times where a "simple" task turned out to be not so simple
> Debug code left in production?
> Moments you wish you could undo
> Most satisfying optimization
> Have you ever been ranted about?

!rant

I trolled my friend by telling him that there's a 100 MB data transfer restriction on Windows right now because of the Ransomware that's floating around the internet.

I can't believe it worked and now he thinks he couldn't copy anime or games from me because it exceeds 100mb file size.

What's your best troll moments to people who're not computer techies?

Work in the morning and here we are devRant, we have to quit doing this to ourselves. We need to take a break. I'm sorry, but you have consumed my life. The chuckles, feed refreshes, and +1s will be but treasured moments I have with you. Wait.. Who am I kidding? I need you! Don't leave, I'll stay with you forever.

How I hate the moments when you realize you have wasted time during the day and want to do everything in the evening.

Please don't mutter your ideas on calls or trail it off mid sentence to mouse level's of sound 🐁.
It's so awkward having to ask what you've said every few moments.
*Especially* if we work together all day all week

N.B. speakers on max volume + auto-captions are already on so I can piece together what you said.

Conversations are so difficult otherwise

That is all

We live for the moments when your code compiled and runs like it should!

My most anxious moments are when I don't know why my code works.

Tough one.

One of my biggest weaknesses is that I'm having trouble with positive feedback.

It's kinda self defense because positive feedback usually means that a negative thing will happen.

One of the moments where I feel like a dev hero is when I can just accept the positive feedback.

Having one of those moments when I question why I am a dev and why the world is such a shithole.

Fucking ears ringing and stomach doing summersaults from stress.

I hope SpaceX discovers alien life so I can go with them!

Does anyone else get blackouts at the end of the week. I mean those moments when you stare at the screen and wonder what the fu*k were you doing right now.

Moments like these when I know the dark side is for me.

So you know those motivating moments, when you are asked by a junior dev 'cause his task is impossible to solve and you take 3 minutes to say it's done?
Well. Juniors are still learning.
BUT WHY CANT YOU USE DOCS AND GOOGLE?????

Using a brute force dictionary algorithm to retrieve every employees password. Access got blocked for a day because they didn't know what my algorithm did, I deleted the main file moments ago. They only saw the curl scripts.

Love when I'm using a tool and get "damn this is well thought out" feeling. Magit (Git client) for Emacs. Been using it for a couple of years and still get these awe moments.

So I was waiting on a mysqldump for over a halfhour wondering why it was taking way to fcking long.

But then I saw I typed mysql -u user -p database > dump.sql

Instead of using the mysqldump command xD at moments like this you realize how important sleep is xD

Ever have one of those moments where you're running a service you built to update about a decade worth of police records, realize about halfway through that you fucked the loop and you're copying data from the first record onto every other record, and then just really wish that you had checked things better in test before running this on the prod server?

I'm sure the only reason I'm still here is because the audit log contained the original values and I'm good at pulling data out of it.

Gotta love those moments when you expand your code and the legacy part magically works just fine. Congrats, past me, for writing a stable core.

Working for 5 months as a junior dev. I receive a request to check out a data issue at client, no one knows what is happening. I quickly find a data import issue and let everybody know. Few days later apparently issue is still not solved. A senior data consultant approaches me asking for help.
senior: 'So, any idea what's wrong with the data?'
me: 'Yeah, someone messed up the import. Just delete it and import it again.'
senior: 'How do you know?'
me: 'Because <insert valid arguments>'
senior: Wow, very clever. Amazing work. I wouldn't have thought about that. Great job'

A few moments later I receive an email from the senior with all the stakeholders in the cc: 'I found the problem and I have a solution <copy/paste my words>'

Finally code start working fine no bugs, no warning just working.

Moments later!

start to compile again but this time either with warning or with bugs. Anyone?

All my coding interviews where embarrassing moments..

when I was 17 (13 years ago) I was doing my A-Levels in computers and we had to build a booking system using excel. that's when I discovered VBA, I learnt a lot and it made the project so much easier to do and with that I wrote my first calendar which was 365 lines of code. one line for each day of the year. it wasn't until I completed the project and going over some of the code it hit me, I turned 365 lines into 4! I was so pleased with myself. one of my best moments of programming.

Unity's "quirk" messed me up again. This time, I wanted the time when the key was pressed as precisely as possible, independent of the framerate.
So I put the input reading routine into the thread pool, which causes the first few readings to throw null reference exceptions. No biggie; the system needs a few moments to warm up. So, I try-catch that part.

But when I build the game, as soon as I reach the part where the game tries to read the input value, it hard-crashes before try-catch can act 🤦

Daaamn! I needed to process some data simultaneously using PHP, so I thought of using Threads to make things faster, checked out SO and discovered that the available Thread class can only be used in cli environment not on a web server ... FML 😑.
It's like these moments that I remember why I hate PHP, and regret accepting this job.

I miss Java 😣😣

I created fully working sudoku in excel...
And then I really wanted to know to create websites.

The feeling in the moments when I got things to work made want to be dev...

Today I had a weird dream. The mars was collapsing to earth. Weird part was when everybody panicking and screaming I was watching it getting bigger and bigger every second. I was like "woah, this is amazing". I knew there was no point being scared because everyone will die anyway. I embraced death and enjoyed my last moments. That was realy weird experience.

I often ask myself why I chose this career path.

Right now, I had one of those moments where it all clicks and falls into place.

Where you can take a problem, have a rapid fire thought through your head and you've got all the modules in memory (pun unintended,) and it's just a case of touching keys.

I think that's why I do what I do. The feeling of satisfaction after you go 'I got it!'
🤙🤙

My very first time was when I first saw a Web page, I really wanted to know how they did it. Two weeks later I built an intranet at home and I thought I was so cool I was shitting out ice cubes.

The very first programme I ever wrote was a secret diary application(C#) for myself I thought it was really secure because I had my own file extension. Not one of my finer moments.

Work Rant, again.

Working on a project, it has a messages feature.
Currently it supports text messages and images.

The guy before me had to leave, so I was put in charge on this project, to develop it.. all alone...

Project Manager : "Please add PDF support to messages"

Me : "Sure its an easy task".

1 day later:
-Starts working on that feature
-PDF files can now be sent.
-Looks at the sent messages-
-Message is there but I... I cant see the PDF file-

Hmmmm...
Moments later I discover the entire system is non-modular... hard-coded images only support.
Fuck me.

Was approached by a recruiter for a job in software development which could be filled by any less-experienced front-end developer in the recruiter's eyes, as long as you had basic Javascript knowledge. Turned out it was for router software/images mostly based on javascript.

They kept asking me proprietary information, which I couldn't know, yet, as I didn't work for them.

duh.

Loosing faith...

Interesting question.

I don't think skills have something to do with faith.

If you don't know something, ask someone who does.

Even If I cannot solve a problem or deem a problem unsolvable, I usually don't doubt myself.

There are rare moments where I throw a fit, but that's not loosing faith, thats just being angry because my stubborn thick skull cannot make sense of it, which annoys me.

Might sound cocky, but in my opinion dev skills are not "do or die". Problem could be solved at a later time, maybe never. Who cares?

Loosing faith would mean to me that I define myself in some way on the ability to solve sth that doesn't have to be solved at all.

XD

After all, if it doesn't work, I don't give a fuck.

*Cheers*.

There is an "SA" who doesn't know anything about different architectures used around, does not ask if he doesn't know and assumes stuff and puts us in those cringe-worthy moments where everyone in the meeting kind of becomes quiet because he is uttering obvious bullshit. He does this in meetings with senior managers and developers from other teams which clearly puts our team down!

!rant but story

Didn't participate in this week rant since the topic is not very relatable to me.

I rarely get truly inspired. There are people I envy. There are things I like. There are moments I go, oh awesome. That's about it.

I doubt myself that I have little bits of narcissist and sociopath traits. Maybe I am. 🤔

My second monitor is about to die...
10 years on service for a plasma monitor.
This monitor is the last surviving piece of two of the most important moments of my life. I was dating the woman of my life which I let go away and was int he Army...
Past is past, still...

The best moments in my career were when I released lines of code as a product and received the feedback from people!!

Moments like this are why I pay my internet bill, even if we are all infected with “the stupid” I love you guys

Inb4: a good post also died for this

A cat sleeping on my shoulder, a late night React dev, and the newly released song from Amorphis in repeat mode in my ears. I love these kinds of moments <3

Do you have those little success moments while coding? Like the feeling of avoiding a new bug because of a test failing 😍

Former coworker had a Post-It on his display:
"When in doubt look char by char"

Often a minor typo can give you a large headache, so this is a really good advice for those WTF moments where you thought the universe isn't working as designed.

I'm sure everyone has their freelance client wtf moments, here's mine: was given literally 1 day to finish a list of pre-publish updates for a website, after waiting 2 weeks to hear back from them since sending them the website to review. Of course I pushed the deadline to a week later, I have no idea what they were expecting...

Those moments when you get up hoping that you don't screw up your day but then end up bugging your code rather than debugging it and then Git/other VCS comes to your help.

For everyone who is having a busy week, just remember the few moments you get with an empty to do folder

Why do anything? We all live on a floating rock. There is no meaning. To define meaning is our lives, objective or subjective, is functionally absurd. We are all here, chasing fleeting moments of joy and pretending like things matter. We are born and then have sex and do the dishes and scroll through our feed endlessly until our inevitable deaths. Nothing matters. Post on DevRant. Or don’t.

Had one of those unicorn coding moments where my from-scratch code worked the first time I wrote and tested it. That hasn’t happened in a long time.

Finished writing code for a feature. Begins code analysis. "Analysing code" moments later "Build Failed". Really?! fucking really?! you tell me that now?

Ok granted it is nearly 1AM here I should go to bed. Good night guys!

More and more getting myself caught thinking about the code more than writing it. I mean I draft it, it is usually very shitty at the first moment, and insted of refinifng and adding spaces to moments I just sit think, write some ideas in my notebook, search on Stack overflow, listen to the music, and wait until the code talks to me.

I know it sounds like some hippie shit, but it actually happens and really solves the problem.

Anyone has the same thing?

I'm thinking of self hosting all my small web projects,

I have this old laptop running ubuntu server heedlessly I used to store and stream pirated movies, after multiple embarrassing moments with free backend/platform as a service options and not finding a cheap VPS, this seems like the way to go. I don't get much traffic on these sites i just want them to be available when i need to present them.

then there's tons of other features that are locked behind a paywall,

I once had to store images in the database because heroku wont accept file uploads and the project hadn't been paid, in short, I was dead broke

Some of the rants this week have been really touching and amazing. This small community holds within itself so many amazing stories.
The most intense day for me was my last day at my first job. It was sad to see some of the best developers I had personally known for the last time. I learnt a lot there and had some really fabulous moments.

I'm learning functional programming for the first time with Elm and I kinda like it, it's just so different from what I'm used and kinda refreshing. My brain is getting a bit twisted though... I'll probably need a few weeks/months to adjust the way I think about code, but I'm liking the mental exercise so far, loving those moments where stuff just "clicks".

Wait, why is nginx communicating from our cache servers to app servers using HTTP1.0? Added http_version 1.1 to a general config. Moments away our responses return 500 on our production because one of our module doesn't handle gzip. If I ever had a heart attack...

As a Developer, we go through all kinds of situations. There are happy moments and there are frustrations.

What I've seen is, my colleagues use booze to chill and put out their stress. I dont drink nor smoke. I feel, i need something to put out my stress. Any suggestions?

That moment when js is like: bro wtf are doing? You don't declare variables types here.

then you're like: wtf this is right, it works. until you look at the js console and you grab a cup of bleach.

new addition to the most frustrating moments in 21st century along with loading screen and low battery.

Last day on my first job where I stayed for a year. I really enjoyed it, loved the team, we were always laughing and making jokes, even in the worst moments.

Had a leader who became a friend, I made some good friends in there.

But I was really unmotivated as a dev, we maintained a really old and complex software, with a poor infrastructure for the dev team.

The manager was a great guy, but couldn't handle much pressure, saw him about 3-4 times quarreling with someone when he should be talking with the team to solve the problem.

But as I said, he is a great guy.

Today the whole team will be making a happy hour as my farewell party. I love this guys.

After that, on monday, I'll be joining a new company, working with a whole new stack, studying a lot for this new challenge.