Goddamned nutsack swallowing fucking horseshit every fucking job offer is JavaScript, I hope the Sun prematurely ages into a black dwarf so that we all fucking die and I don't have to spend the rest of my life pretending this retarded ass language is actual programming.

And if you like JS then fuck you, bitch. IDGAF. Go suck your own dick or something.

So about two months ago in my consulting firm I was asked to replace a colleague on a project (node and Angular). The project is only a few months old but it’s already a total clusterfuck. DB is very poorly designed. It’s supposed to be a relational database but there’s not a trace of a foreign key or any key for that matter and I’ve seen joins like tableA.name = tableB.description (seriously, that’s your relation??). The code is a mess with entire blocks of code copied from another project and many parts of the code aren’t even used. He didn’t even bother renaming variables so they would make sense in the context they were shamelessly thrown into. The code is at best poorly typed if not typed at all.

During our dailies I sometimes express my frustration with my other colleagues as I very politely allude to my predecessor’s code as being hard to work with. (They are all “good friends" with him). I always get the same response from my colleagues: "yeah but you’ve gotta understand Billybob was under a lot of pressure. The user stories were not well defined. He didn’t have time to do a proper job". That type of response just makes me boil inside.

Because you think I have time to deal with this shit? You don’t think I’m working with the same client and his user stories that are barely intelligible? How long does it take to write type definitions for parameters going into a function? That’s right, 30 seconds at most? Maybe a minute if it’s a more elaborate object? How much time do you think you’ll save yourself with a properly typed function or better yet an interface? Hard to tell but certainly A LOT MORE than those 30 seconds you lost (no, the 30 seconds you INVESTED) in writing that interface!!!

FUCK people with their excuses! Never tell me you don’t have time to do a proper job! You’ve wasted HOURS of my time just because you were too fucking lazy to type your functions, too lazy to put just a little more thought into designing your tables, too lazy to rename a variable so that it’s name actually makes sense where it’s being used. It’s not because you were short on time. You’re just lazy!
FUCK!!!!!!

From wiki: "The word 'hacker' derives from the seventeenth-century word of a 'lusty laborer' who harvested fields by dogged and rough swings of his hoe."

Isn't it fun when meaning shifts over time?

I remember hearing old school guys refer to themselves as hackers for years and my thought was whoa, so you fucks were pentesting in the 70s? Holy shit.

... turns out their usage of the word differs from my understanding of it. And to be honest, I've read so many definitions of the term since I have no fucking idea what an 'actual' hacker even is anymore.

So a 'hack' is supposedly a clever yet unorthodox solution? I always used it to mean 'I pulled some shit from my fucking ass and now it works', that is to say, this is a somewhat shabby and arcane way to get the job done but I have not found a viable alternative, or at least not one that makes any more sense when read through the lens of conventional logic.

Perhaps both meanings apply, in their own way.

One things for sure: I'd rather refer to my 'clever' bits of code as black magic rather than hacking -- but *just* to be silly about it.

So they finally implemented vaccination certificates here that are apparently "WHO recognized" and you can generate it online. We used to only have vaccination cards. Guess what?

1. There's a data privacy section that's supposed to be step 1 but when you load the page, you're on step 2 where you have to enter your details. Step 1 is not clickable, you advanced child! You're skipping grades, congrats.

2. They have questions that can be answered with "yes" or "no", the question itself is a drop-down and wait, clicking it opens a dialog box that has two radio buttons for "yes" or "no". Amazin'.

3. Some words are capitalized for no fucking reason. It's so random, it makes you wonder if such entities exist and you just don't know about them.

4. There's minimal validation for the dates and even the bare minimum doesn't make sense.

5. You have to enter each detail in perfect order, otherwise it will assume you didn't enter anything.

6. Some of the fields are required but it allows you to proceed anyway. Well, it's your fault, get fucked.

7. Their version of CAPTCHA is literally a dialog box with random texts on it. TEXTS. If you enter it wrong, it doesn't generate a new one so take your time, dear. You'll get it right.

8. When it tells you that you did something wrong (rare), it flashes a black box at the top of the page that says "Oops, that's incorrect!" A literal fucking high school project.

9. When you finally reach the last page, it proudly informs you that they have successfully looked you up except your name is wrong. You know it's you from the first and last name, the date of birth, the vaccine brand, the vaccination site, time, and date. For some reason, the middle name is wrong and it's not a matter of "John" and "Jhon" or "Louise" and "Louis". They got the first two syllables right, removed one, and made up the few others. HOW?

I remember going to the vaccination site and seeing the brand new tablets they struggle to use. They even have keyboards and some slick leatherette casing for each. There's not a single scratch on those things. They have the best of the best tools while typing with one hand. Okay, maybe it's not the best tool but it's ages away from the typical pen and paper oops-i-lost-it system they had before. I chastised myself for being a cunt. "Come on, they're trying."

This is where our taxes go. High end tools for the damn fools. Even the website, just like every other government website, looks like a high school student's project. I thought the last bullshit I'll ever see was that stupid OTP crap that doesn't actually send you an OTP, it just writes the numbers on the textbox and all you have to do is press the OK button.

God have mercy.

Thursday afternoon. Client gives us the go to deploy the latest release to production.
Friday late afternoon; my colleague - "wait, did we ever deploy"? Me - "uh, nope".
"Alright have a good weekend"

Second week sick I see how my life slowed down and how meaningless everything around is, everyone is rushing about some bullshit, name it new amazing job opportunity, black Friday great deal, super duper product idea or some most important bug on production that we need to fix asap.

All that can’t wait a week when I’m healthy?
Seriously, people lost their minds in today’s world to some bullshit.

I’m to old and to depressed to care about such idiotic things. Living my life as I want and on my own peace, don’t care everyone is running, I’m slowly walking and I like it.

It’s better to walk straight than run around like an idiot.

Non tech hobby of mine: bird watching (you may have guessed based on my username). Although it’s a non tech hobby, there are so many great apps to help identify birds and learn about them. EBird, birdnet, Merlin, picture bird etc. I also have a few books about bird watching.

Crazy how many different kinds of birds you can see when you really start paying attention.

Every time a read a rant about a company environment here I think: “It sounds exactly like my previous company!”

But I know we are in different countries…

I guess that when companies suck over a given threshold, they distort space and time like a black hole and become a unique super dimensional joint venture.