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Met a cute girl at the ATM today.
Long story short, she gave me her Instagram account and I ended up giving her my GitHub account.13 -
So, my wife sends me this picture because our car had 111,111 miles on it. Of course she called me a nerd when I told her, "That is awesome because if you ignore the .3 on the trip odometer it is 63 and that in binary is 111111"
8 -
Just because I'm a programmer doesn't mean I'm some nerd that watches anime, relishes in video games, and spends more time around computers than around girls!
Even though that's all true...10 -
How to properly have fun on a Saturday night:
1. Suddenly become deeply unsatisfied with current linux distro
2. Evaluate alternatives
3. Decide some change is needed but not too much: install fresh version of old distro
4. Once again, experience profound dissatisfaction
5. Opt for radical change
6. Erase all linux partitions, form a super partition and install a new linux distro on it
7. Spend hours familiarising with the new distro
8. Spend more hours googling stuff and typing commands in the terminal
9. Download current devRant avatar, send it to the PC via Telegram and set it as user's avatar for the welcome screen
10. Feel deeply satisfied
11. Accidentally wake girlfriend up while trying to get to bed. Get told off for staying up until 4am and for "being such a nerd"21 -
Confession: I am not a dev, I actually work on an IT helpdesk telling people how to turn on their PC's everyday.
It's soul destroying!!
My boyfriend is an Apple dev though, and I only joined DevRant to see if it would help me understand what he talks about 24/7...
I have very basic coding knowledge but still find this all so fascinating!
You guys are so smart, and can literally create anything in the blink of an eye.
Why are you guys generally so very under appreciated??
You also have a fantastic sense of humour! Haven't laughed at so many nerd-jokes in years!
Loving DevRant so far!
Keep up the great work! :)31 -
I am feeling nerdier than ever.
Today is:
- PI day
- Einstein birthday
- Stephen Hawking died today
- My birthday25 -
Am I the only one who hesitates to ++ a rant with 32, 64, 128, 256, etc ++'s?
I mean there's something satisfying about seeing 2^n numbers as an all-around computer nerd...13 -
Wikipedia says that a nerd/geek lacks social skills. They should see this amazing community, thanks DevRant :)10
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My girlfriend got me these for christmas – as she wanted to gift me the most nerd-ish tshirt she could find.
13 -
"That's fair" 😂😂
Try visiting - https://nerdstagram.com
Follow me on Twitter for more such stuff - https://twitter.com/manbirmarwah
11 -
A big FUCK YOU to everyone who called me a nerd in high school.
Who's earning more now? Ha!
Jokes on you!
But seriously, I didn't realise intelligence is highly appreciated until I started working as a developer. 🤑5 -
So we are a bunch of nerds huh? Without any social life? or friends?
You motherfucker, if it wasn't for the community that developers have built, you would still be living in stone age. Seriously, the way we share our hard work with each other, spending hundreds of hours on a library and making them open source on the internet, I don't think any other community out there does it so selflessly.
So next time you're calling me boring, you can take a big piece of shit and put it up in your arse.12 -
programming languages are not designed to talk to computers, they are designed to be readable by other programmers.
please code like it.7 -
Friend: I wiped this drive, and then I open it in my Hex viewer app, and it's all zeros!
Me: yeah?
Friend: Why isn't it empty?
Me: uh well a drive must have its bits set to some value and can't just nothingness so zeros is just a default meaningless value that resolves to nothing..
Friend: No, but why is it full of zeros? why it isn't empty?
...
I attempted several times and then exploded. rip self14 -
Husband wanted to not go out after dinner to "go cuddle in bed." This apparently is code for him browsing mathmatica stack exchange and reading books on data analysis with R... 😂6
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Got some swag in the mail today.
I was told I could get a refund for the hat if it was too small. I literally have the biggest head in the world and it fits me fine.
For those who complained, did you try taking it off and on again?
6 -
"Is it sexy when I talk in nerd words? Ie 11....backwards compatibility....fallback..."
My fiancé.10 -
Had to delete and repost because the original screenshot showed something personal.
Original caption: How dare Tumblr calls me a nerd! It might be true... But still!
13 -
A nerd often get to act support. I got this question about a year ago from a friend. (I've translated it into english.)
3 -
A fucking wasp bit me and now (after heating up the affected area thoroughly) I'm keeping it cool like a true nerd.
9 -
The best part of being a dev?
You can be a nerd, you can dress lousy, you got all those fancy tech you can work with, it's diverse, it's fun. And on top of that, it's not even remotely hard to find a job and get payed well.8 -
My cousin bought me a backpack big enough for both laptops and all the gear I need (with pockets for all). I'm a happy nerd 😄8
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Lol just found the world of Warcraft soundtrack at spotify...
On my way to work, feeling like walking through the gates of Stormwind...
Where my nerds at?! (Huh)?26 -
My first machine with a primary partition on SSD and it restarts so fast I had a nerd-gasm!
SSD all the things!!!4 -
In the project management system we use with our clients I see file named, 'instructions for backup.'
I open the file and all it contains is my name and phone number.😑4 -
I am a hobby programmer. I just got rejected by the biggest crush of my life. I guess I'm stuck with my stupid wothless fucking life writing code. How fucking exciting....22
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In IT-Class:
Random: Ey watcha doin?
Me: Programming. What else?
Random: Oh, you're such a nerd...
Me: Programming is fun! I really like it.
Random: Please don't say this is your hobby...
Me: It is.
Random: Bruuh... *goes away*
Why the fuck are you here, if you're not interested in programming???
I don't understand such people.13 -
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.7
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Banks be like
You don't have much money?
Here, let me keep taking some of that from you until you get more, k?
Oh, that was more than you had?
Now you owe me even more, nerd.
What, you can't pay that either?
Better ask me for a loan so you can pay off your debt to me. Loser.
What? You still can't pay?
I'm gonna take your everything!30 -
!rant
I'm at a club and browsing devRant whilst my friends are getting drunk.
I guess I'm really an introvert and a huge nerd.3 -
How people see me:
Father: computer nerd (he's a coder too)
Mother: website maker and computer nerd
Brother#1: some computer wizard
Brother#2: noob web coder (he codes as well, but systems programming) - thanks bro!
Colleagues: The ALIEN™
Girlfriend: 404 not found
Friends: The NERD™
Dog: some hooman spending lots of time behind those lighty rectangles
Fyi, I am passionate about computers in all domains and always helped debugging people
My solution to not being overwhelmed with futile demands? Talking to them in complicated words, so they will only ask questions about true problems and not garbage :D3 -
This rant means YOU if you are one of those people that "fix" their family's computers.
I was visiting my family over the holidays and while I managed to stay away from fixing their computers for the most time, I offered to help my grandfather to update the Garmin navigation device he wanted to gift my father. (They do not use smartphones for navigation, and my father doesn't want "these modern shitty phones".)
When booting up my grandfather's laptop, I realized something odd: Linux Mint boot screen. Wut?
And immediately I said: "It could be impossible to update your navigation device on this laptop."
As true enough, the Garmin Express update software requires either a Windows PC or a Mac; and even though I vaguely hoped it might be possible to upgrade through Linux, I just could not be bothered to find out that day.
What I wondered though is why did my grandfather of all people ran Linux!?
Don't get me wrong, I use Linux myself on my work machine and I never want to work with something else when coding; yet my grandfather is an end user of the show-me-where-and-what-and-how-often-to-click-kind.
What could he gain by it?
As it turns out, the computer nerd's friend of my uncle managed his PC. And my uncle and he decided unanimously my grandfather should better run Linux. Is it something my grandfather needs? No. BUT IT'S RIGHT! Suck it up! (My father's laptop therefore also runs Linux Mint. So he can't upgrade his new device either.)
This is the ugly kind of entitled nerd-dom I truly detest.
When discussing things further, my grandfather told me that he had problems ever since with his printer. Under Windows, he knew how to print on the special photo paper. Under Linux, all he can barely manage is to print on normal papers. Shame, printing photos was the only thing he liked doing on that device. What did my uncle's friend tell him?
"Get a decent printer!"
Fuck that guy.
It's fine if Linux works for you, but before you install it on a PC of a relative, you better make sure it fits their needs! If you have that odd member that only wants to write letters, read emails, use facebook, and wants to play that browser game, feel free to introduce them to Linux.
Yet if they have any special wish, don't stand in their way.
If they want to do something that requires a certain OS, don't just decide for them that their desire is wrong, but help them achieve their goal. If you can't align that with your ideology, then get the fuck out of my way and stop "helping".
For some people, a computer is a device to achieve a certain goal, a work. They only get hindered by your ill-advised attempts at virtue signalling.9 -
Today is a great day for me! Today I've reached my weight goal - 99.9 . That's right guys - this nerd can proudly say that he's lost 20kg since last Nov!
Boi does that feel amazing.
So yeah guys, listen up. If your weight is <100 - appreciate that! Your hearts aren't in trouble, you can bend easily to put your socks on, you can sit with your legs crossed, you can do sooo many things! Enjoy it. And don't let it go easily. Don't think like I did: "meeh, it's just one more kilo -- I'll tackle it down later". It's a // TODO. It'll never happen!15 -
Running an Alpaca farm in rural Finland, next to some mountain creek with an oldschool water mill so I can grind flour and coffee beans.
I hated people so I tried to find solace as a nerd in technology, but tech is also fucking awful so I feel like retiring in a tranquil forest with some equally grumpy wooly animals.
If I get eaten by a bear because I'm a skimpy city boy that's OK, more epic than being found decomposing slumped over on a keyboard in the boring grey suburbs.
All of this is probably pandemic-me talking though. So sick of this concrete city with the farting cars and fat obnoxious shoppers.
I need some trees around me, and some mammals with a higher IQ than my current neighbors.9 -
Got a new colleaque. System Engineer with coding skills.
First step is to become adjusted to hearing high heels in our nerd room.
:)13 -
Coding destroyed my life. I used to be tripping and seeing flowers，now i feel like media breakpoints，i used to dream about jungle，now i dream about creating components，i used to have a few problems，now i have nothing else but problems，and here i am at 7am ranting for the first time on a nerd application which i didnt get the rants about... But now i laugh...
Where is this going????5 -
Purchase $900 laptop, it's not powerful enough so I return it and get $1,100 laptop, still not powerful enough, return it and get $1,600 laptop. Realize I have a gaming PC and don't need the laptop this powerful and I return it and repurchase the first laptop I bought with a $100 discount because it's now an opened-box, but I know for a fact that it was the one that I got in the first place and opened.
Thanks Best Buy.3 -
Mom is proud. My sister thinks I am a huge nerd. Dad is jealous because he would have done CS but it didn't really exist when he went to college. My grandparents think I can fix everything now (like resetting their facebook!password :D )3
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Yesterday was the day.
The day I finally got asked for help on fixing a printer;
And finally telling in freaking polite German to fuck off, google the problem, never ask a programming nerd again for this shit - and to understand that printers are evil monsters5 -
This week Im firing a guy who I hired 5 weeks ago. I cant take it anymore. I setted up a nice environment for him and he keeps taking whole day sometimes two or three to do a 2 hour task. He came from electrical engineering background and never had a software dev job. As a person hes more creative type not logical based type. I dont have nor patience nor resources nor time to teach him basics that be could google but simply doesnt have the mindset to do. Sorry bill gates not everyone can learn how to code, or at least not everyone should.
Advice to other people hiring new hires: test the shit out of them before hiring, dont hire from gut. This guy was giving out a nerd vibe, but the only nerd thing that he has is nerdy puns, other than that as a software dev he know less than I did when I was 12 years old.25 -
The best part you see, is that no one here will think of you as a nerd.
It's like safe haven for programmers/developers.5 -
!rant
My work does this contest where they email everyone a puzzle where you have to guess a safety slogan. They give you maybe 1-2 letters in each word and there are about 5 or 6 words. So I found a list of every word in the English language online, I imported it into a database and I ran a few queries to return all possible words for each, depending on the length of the word, and where the letter hints are placed. I haven't missed one puzzle so far. :D
p.s. I told my girlfriend and she said, "I am dating a nerd".6 -
Okay, I love programming - making my code better faster more readable^^ but I am not a nerd, I have no idea what's going on in star wars or star trek, I do not fucking care about Game of Thrones - I prefer to go out in some clubs and so... I hate it when people are so fucking surprised about my job and interests.
There are programmers who are not nerds live with it!21 -
I attended a data science meetup recently. There were many suits walking around the corridors because of some startup night taking place at the same time.
After some time a guy appeared infront of me, telling me he was afraid at first that this was a meetup for suits only. Until he saw all the dev and rock stickers on my notebook. He was reliefed that there was some nerd at least.
He asked what I was doing so I told him about my startup about optimization of heat generation plants jada jada. I asked him back.
He replied, "Well, I'm also part of some small startup. Among the things we develop processors and stuff. It's called Intel."
Well dude, that was nicely played. I had a lot of fun that evening.5 -
I was sitting in the University when a cute girl we know asked us If we have a Chewing Gum with mint flavour. We hadn't, but a friend of mine replied with 'I've got Linux Mint! In case you wanna try... "
Advanced silence or about 3 minutes after that...4 -
i had a nightmare the other day that i was at work explaining to a friend that 1/3 is the same as 3/9 and i was shocked why they ddnt approve. then they pull out a calculator and i see that while the first fraction yields 0.33 the second yielded 0.057. so i felt so nervous and panicked then i woke up.4
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So guys and gurls...
I'm a member of devRant for about 1.5 weeks now. I already have over 130 likes on my rants in total about things I was never able to post without being labeled a nerd. I literally love you guys! Thanks to @dfox and @trogus for making it possible for us to discuss things that matter for us!6 -
So I'm still a student in college.
I'm always in the library either writing code, or studying math (huge nerd).
People talk with each other, talk with girls, laugh with girls, and I'm just doing my thing.. alone.
I'm also reasonably attractive and super thin, and so girls also look at me alot (which scares me).
So people think I'm this super mysterious programmer guy that always has headphones on and is doing God knows what... Probably also awkward and super shy (which really is the case)..
Then out of nowhere, I'm laughing, smiling and having a blast because of something I read on devRant..
My cheeks hurt from because I try to keep the laughs in, and then when I can't take anymore I get out from library just to be able to laugh :D ...
Anyone else in a similar situation? Can you relate?13 -
Been off work for the last 2 weeks, got a text yesterday and apparently everything was manic. Kind of nice to know everything falls apart when I'm not there ;)3
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My fiance is also a programmer. He doesn't say he loves me often, but than he does it looks/sounds like ''I [less than 3] you'' 🙃
Or he will prefers to ask me what am I cooking for dinner by using arduino & a display 🙄1 -
Friend : I will do this when I get back from work.
Me : But you are working from home, aren't you?
Friend : Yes, but I am at work, right now.
Me: And how does your route back home look like?
Friend : I switch input source from my work's laptop to gaming rig.6 -
me: do we need to setup the shop to charge a flat shipping rate, or charge per item?
🕛3 hours later.
client: yes, that is correct.
me: 😧2 -
Internet stopped working yesterday and the ISP company told me they couldn't send a person for a week!
I'm stuck at home, I have to have internet.
Long story short, I got no sleep last night and I may have voided my routers warranty, but I got internet.8 -
I love it.
I'm a geek, and a nerd,
I love everything that computers,
I love electronics, physics, even mathematics,
I love thinking, solving problems, learning new things.
And programming is all of those combined, I love it with a passion.5 -
Worst realisation of myself when I was a greenhorn dev? Nobody gives a f***ing damn of what you achieve as a software developer. For them you're just the uncool nerd - end of story. That's where I just stopped having any conversations about my job at all... unless it's with other devs.10
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Hahaha guys I got the HTTP response codes tattooed on my arm so I don't forget them! Aren't I fun and quirky? I'm such a code nerd, oh thanks for the likes, Twitter! Wowowowow i am just SO FUN. Look at my nerdy tattoo!!
10 -
Anyone else get extreme excitement/anxiety when you overhear random strangers discussing dev and nerd stuff, while you're sitting there trying really hard not to eavesdrop and join in?9
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!rant I'm beginning my nerd project of getting my IBM 5150 to the internet via my raspberry pi and a terminal emulator. Oh and the IBM has a 4gb (yes gigabytes) HDD in the form of a compact flash.
The pi is a model B. Even as an older pi, look at the difference in size versus performance!
The 5150 is 4.77 mhz
The Pi is 900mhz
12 -
Finished our Christmas tree at work today. Featuring Zip ties, faulty burned blu rays, an old keyboard, a led stripe, cut IDE Cables and a 10m cat 5e cable and the holy Debian as topping
Sadly I cant capture all of its beauty in a single picture
I call him the GeekTree
5 -
So I had a thought this morning while brushing my teeth.....maybe I should change my devRant avatars clothes every day? That way it looks like a real person and stuffs......then it HIT me suddenly.....I'm a fucking loser.1
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I wish there were some sort of nerd club in my city were IT ppl gathered and build a datacenter just for fun13
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"So I have this awesome app idea..."
Proceeds to tell me, "I'll be, like, the face of the company, and you can just focus on the tech stuff, in the background."
Chad called me ugly nerd, so I took his idea, got an investment from his own father, built the company, and sold it.
See Chad got a new job as a sales development rep
At the company I built and sold
Haha epic2 -
*At a dorm gathering*
Me: I think I’m gonna head back to my room, I don’t know what to do here
Friend: Come on, meet people! Socialize!
Me: *sighs* Fine
You know you’re a nerd when...5 -
Every single time a cool electronic device comes out, that connects to an API. The nerd in me can’t resist getting on a 3 month waiting list to get said gadget. I impatiently wait. I get gadget. It’s usually cool but never as cool as the marketing made it seem….thats not the rant yet.
Within 2 year the company is gone and i’m left with a $500-$1,000 paperweight that doesn’t work anymore.
This has happened to every single device I have bought that wasn’t from a billion $ company.
These companies would rather screw everyone over instead of simply making the backend of product open-source so people that use the product can at least try to get it working again.
My 1st rant. Sorry in much better in real life at bitching about things 😎7 -
Thirty hours over two weeks, but we finally patched a angular app that was originally built on 2 (alpha) to 4, reducing the load time ten fold.
Don't thank me, thank super duck. The duck with the power to debug any code.
Gawd I'm tired.
2 -
So... after a vision test on a whim, it turned out I needed glasses.
Turns out sitting in front of a screen all day did actually mess my eyes up 😂
Luckily I only need them for using the computer for extended periods of time, so managed to run them through my company as an expense.
14 -
Got the cheapest laptop I could find that would run Windows mixed reality.
Installed Linux subsystem for Windows and Ubuntu.
Nothing but giant flying terminal windows across my view of a virtual Seascape.
This is my new home.4 -
Top three reasons why I love to code:
1) People will think you are a wizard and feel so afraid of you that they call you nerd and give you a office in a cold basement (especially good in summer times)
2) Your friends call you for every problem they have with their computer and will give you a few bucks or beers in exchange.
3) You can rant about technical stuff and no matter how unfounded the rant is, your non-tech friends will believe everything you say.2 -
I want to talk about my last six months at work. Who wants to hear it?
Spoiler alert : from introverted nerd to Talkative flirt
What did it cost? Everything.14 -
My family thinks I'm the tech nerd that can basically solve anything related to technical stuff within a blink of an eye.
I'm just better at googling than them mostly -
I think it will be very odd to ask a girl to wait so that I can read the code on her skirt, with no wrong intentions.
I guess she won't understand how attractive source codes are.
15 -
Anyone else like stickers for their laptop, but not the stereotypical "there's no place like 127.0.0.1" stickers?
Like I've got one for a local charity that supports teaching underprivileged kids that want to learn how to surf, a cooler brand one, one for my school, a clothing brand I like, ect?
Idk I just don't like the typical computer nerd stickers 🤷🤷6 -
The bartender stole one euro from me. (Just didn't give me the rest of my money)
So like the awkward nerd that I am, I left and will just sulk and never go back there. I thought this was my new nook. Turns out, no more.
Sad Friday evening noises in distance.9 -
!dev
Got me a new mouse pad since the only one I had was branded with my last jobs logo. Mordor is right where I usually rest my hand so it will eventually get dirtier and therefore more evil.
8 -
"I'm a very bad girl" she said, biting her lip. "I need to be punished hard" she said and crawled toward him.
He said "Oh yes I will punish you in a way you can't imagine!" and installed windows 10 on her laptop. -
Reviewing code for applications after not working on it for six months.
Client: so what is the first step to adding our new feature.
Me: I really think we need to redo the entire architecture from the ground up. It won't work any differently than it does now, but the code will be cleaner.
Client:😓
Me:😅3 -
i wish i could half-ass work, but instead I'm a huge nerd who does a good job and people are giving me more shit to do now4
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So I'm the typical nerd in my class, who studies a lot, and really dives into the topics.
It's really fun to see when other people are struggling with something. That means I can try to help them, and I just get a lot of joy out of helping people 😊56 -
COO Snake ousts CEO, fires founders, is generally clueless about tech and product and design and science (and basically everything this business is about) and expected me to drop everything else I do (rich, varied and fulfilling) and work full time as a slave-nerd. Some people just don’t get it.
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I was one of the 'popular' guys in school you know the cool ones and dumb as fuck. Now I am the nerd one lol. Seems like I found a passion.4
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Looks like I'm @dfox evil twin.
class nerd-san extends dfox {
constructor() {
evil = true;
sunglasses = true;
}
}
3 -
Mom: Give me one single reason why won't you do MBA?
Me: People there won't get my jokes on computers, and it will be all like high school again 😭😭😭 -
A musician friend of mine: SOMEONE SHOULD IMMEDIATELY DEVELOP A LANGUAGE CALLED C♭ OR I'M GONNA FIND A NERD AND BEAT HIM TIL HE DOES SO!
(She's actually a nice person.)3 -
Mom and Dad were proud, when I said I will develop Apps.They helped me to found my own company and arranged some new clients.
My brother is happy with it and is taking CS courses at school.
I've never met people who treated me as a nerd or did not accept my choice1 -
Been watching NerdCubed for years. Finally got to meet him and Rebecca at the launch of his first book woo.
2 -
Me: Hey girl, what's your address?
Girl: 5.15.126.4
Me: No man, your local address.
Girl: 127.0.0.1
Me: Oh, you geeky nerd! I mean your physical address!
Girl: 40:37:0E:6A:A7:AD2 -
!rant
Last Week I wrote a english Test ( im German ) In the Test I was asked to translate (cast) "gips" into english. I didnt remember the Word so I thought to myself "I wish i could just CAST the german Word into english"
Now I know the Word...3 -
I worked with a delightfully eccentric co-worker for many years... He was a UI/UX guy by trade but had a uniquely broad set of experiences in life.
Typical day often included singing, nerd-ranting and general jovial conversation. He was always a hoot at lunch as well, choosing to loudly proclaim his ultimate satisfaction and enjoyment at the meal he was consuming. -
Our Code everlasting
The all creating One
Coders Almighty
Through Our Holy Lines
Conceiving Algorithms
Konrad Zuse our Savior
I believe in Clean Code
I believe in Free Software
I believe in Open Source
Our Code is three in one
I believe in the bug-free project
That'll be compiled again
For I believe in the name of Alan Turing -
The dreaded day has come were me eldest daugther now has boy attention coming to the door - but wait whats this ... hes a programmer and a tad bit of a nerd .... seems i raised you well sweet child
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Not all computer programmers are NERDS people just assume you are a nerd once you tell them you write code6
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best advice i know
get both into programming and body building.
"you're such a nerd for using linux 🤡" well yeah but do you see this huge biceps?
"you're not even that strong 🤡" well yeah but look at my bank account
17 -
I don't wanna ask (insert search engine of your choice) but devRant today:
How would you define a
- nerd
- geek
etc
Is it an insult or status to be proud of?12 -
On typing "beau"
My mobile keypad auto suggestions shows:
BeautifulSoup4 before beautiful
Seems like I crawled way too much than chatting with somebody. -
Does devrant have a public api? Tempted to write an atom plugin so I can pretend to work, but actually rant.1
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Some guy bought a whole bunch of city specific domain names once and wanted me to code the websites for him and manage and support the sites for 5% equity in his business. I told him you realize I can buy my own domains for very little money and build the sites for 100% ownership. His idea was not so bad for that time but he just thought that I was a nerd and he could just use me and I would just be passive and go along being that I'm desperate to make friends.
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Some minutes ago our firewall in office overheated, no internet, no network, no real way to work some time for coffee and nerd talk - not bad at all1
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This story is really quite amazing.
I got into my current company thanks to keeping a friendship from a quasi-ex-girlfriend. She got me in contact with her husband, who besides being a fellow nerd was also a highly-respected guy inside the company. Which is to say his name carried quite a bit of weight, and got me an interview and ultimately a job.
I got in via Support, but finally got promoted to developer last year, and have been enjoying it quite a bit. -
after playing Pokémon go consecutively for the last 2 days I have forgot myself as a developer. it was hard to join office today.
-
My wife is a bigger nerd that me. She just told me Rooster Teeth is shutting down. Who knows shit like that? I haven't looked at anything Rooster Teeth since Red vs Blue.
Earlier conversation with her about something else:
Me: I can't believe how stupid people are. I cannot believe people are stupid enough to...
Her: Hold up. You really need to expand your imagination about how stupid people can actually be.
Me: I am not smart enough to understand how stupid people can be.
Yeah, I think she may be the smart one. She makes up for my weaknesses.4 -
Is using Arch Linux the nerd equivalent of being vegan?
Like they have to mention it to everyone.
Btw I use Arch and am vegan.2 -
I remeber being classified as the nerd at school. Picked on because i wasnt socially normal or part of the croud. Programming became my love and a few years later. Im doing very well and now those that use to think it was fun picking on me see me as the guy they need inspiration ideas and help from because im doing well for myself and im considering helping them.
It sucks being a good guy.. I cant get myself to turn others away that needs help2 -
Got a Yubikey today. Seems like a really cool bit of kit. Time to nerd out and 2FA all the things.2
-
I always recite borg quotes in my head when my classes need to inherit properties. Your technological and biological distinctiveness with be added to our own. Resistant is futile.
-
I was wondering why monitors sleep and keyboards don't. Then I realised that the keyboard has two SHIFTS.1
-
Every time I see a set of stickers arrive in a far off country (just saw Kenya!? What!?) it makes me really happy. Spread the angry developer nerd rage. Let it flow through you.1
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Client sends screenshots, compressed, and shrunk down to an unreadable size, inside a docx file.
Just... just no. Where is a spray bottle or a rolled up newspaper when you need one.
(For you three people who are going to comment 'why don't you just teach them...' ssssssssssshut up, some people are just unteachable ( for you other three who are going to say 'everyone is teachable.' Not true, if it was you wouldn't be saying such things.))1 -
so a client yesterday decides they need a site built by eop Friday, that has been quoted today. if approved first thing tomorrow gives about 1.5 days to get it done. Thanks boss
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Im off of 3 hours sleep right now after getting lost down the rabbit hole of debugging.
I was just putting stock on the shelves at my job and a customer came up to me and asked me where something was. I thought of two places it could be so i said:
"if item == aisle4
{print("You've found it"); }
else if item == aisle6
{print("You've found it"); }
else
{print ("Im unsure where it is sorry"); }"
She just looked at me and my coworker told her where the item was, once she left my coworker started laughing at me and called me the biggest nerd he knew.1 -
ive never made a friend due to my code.
maybe you mean the output of it?
ive had a couple websites and apps and shit like that where people called it 'cool' and stuff, but i don't want friends who view me as the "nerd"1 -
Just bought the pathfinder starter pack for some dev friends over at the office. The nerd cave is finally coming back!
-
I think some of my co-workers see me as real life human version of Google search engine.
Hope they would understand that just because I'm little bit more up to date in tech knowledge and an accidental Google nerd doesn't make me a know it all..
But i understand their tendency to trust my recommendation over their googling skills
They want me to find
1- best freelancing website
2- best platform or service for someone who wants to do online teaching
Results that I'm aware of:
1- freelancer, guru, upwork
2- YouTube, udemy, Pluralsight, skillshare, thinkific
Any other recommendations?2 -
i am (somewhat unreasonably) mad at a ten year old classmate of my child. he showed off his programming skills by typing print commands. i wanted to mock him a little by pointing out python 2 would be out of date. he called my child a noob and suggested i don't know shit and he'd be coding c++.
so beside me obviously having no dignity for mocking someone quarter my age, i am not even mad for him talking shit about me, i am just overwhelmingly disappointed about his entitlement and blatant lies. so this is the future? this is an uprising nerd? i'd love to encourage every child on programming, but not with this attitude.13 -
I'm on the way to building my own B2B SAAS business. I code all day, sleep for 3 hours, have no money, and sometimes do a couple of freelancing projects to survive.
My friends are in jobs, earning way more than me. I feel a bit jealous, doubting my abilities.
Am I doing right? Or I'm just a nerd with a potato computer struggling like a dog? Am I even walking on the correct path?7 -
A very high chance of becoming asocial which will fuck up everything afterwards. Basically the same reason as with any other nerd work/hobby.
-
Kind of dev related, during a Firefly one-shot roleplay:
GM: So you have a data chip in your pocket. Do you want to see what's on it?
Me (hesitant): ...Kinda. *wait* Okay, I put the chip into one of my computers.
GM: The data chip shows random gibberish--it's encrypted. Your engineer may know how to decrypt it.
Me: Okay. Hey, Engineer! *holds imaginary data chip out to her* Decrypt this!
Engineer: No. *pause*, *sighs* Fine. But we need to be careful.
GM: Yes, now time for technobabble...
Me: So once we decrypt this, it's probably going to look for the MAC address, so we need an air-gapped machine--a machine that's never been online before--and a TAILS LiveUSB. We'll decrypt the data chip and then destroy the computer.
GM: ...Technobabble.
Fighter: ....I actually understood that and it actually makes sense. Good job. *fist bump*1 -
Spent two hours having two recruiters give me test, interviewing, and being told HOW perfect I am for the job I was applying for; Just to be told they are only allowed to send over people they have found previous work for, but I should instead apply to these othwr positions that pay half what I'm looking for.
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Hello, I'm so nerd.
I want to build my avatar here. And even don't know what is a 'Rant' 😅.
But, I can tell a little story...
I'm learning js with an online teacher who has the most adorable Argentinian accent and now I talk like him.5 -
The school I went to, and this was really the only benefit of the school, gave all it students lifetime memberships to digital tutors, which was bought out by pluralsight, which then bought code School. So I basically got free membership to three different sites, all of which have a good amount of technical training with videos, guides, and work along lessons on them.
For what school cost to me, it will have paid for itself as long as I live for another Thousand Years.1 -
Last Friday night instead of partying, or seeing a movie I stayed home to clean up some code for a potential job interview. Good times! :D3
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I recently found an old friend to help my debugging — I don't have a duck, but for some reason people see them as unserious and think the ones I've got are either cute, quirky, or a natural part of the nerd habitat :P
4 -
That nerdy moment when you explain HTML/CSS to a friend willing to learn how things work and you're using Star Trek factions as an example. Gutters become neutral zones, classes become colors by discipline, and Romulans are designated by their identification as a species after the Hobus star system goes supernova.
http://codepen.io/lquessenberry/...4 -
This made my day, my c++ watch face got featured in the Nerd Pride category :D
https://facer.io/watchface/... -
I`m new to coding. So i`m also new at ranting.
I know i have something to rant about. But my nerd culture is just not yet at the level.
I have been taught by a mate to used linux and started vanilla javascript. We use intellj as IDE.
So i have to speak to this client whose previous IT provider was gonna code his thing with ASP and visual studio!!!
Right?! WTF?!!! But that`s all i got!!!!
Im pretty sure its a wtf?! But i don`t have the rock solid reasons why.
Please ranters help me become better at rantong and tell me i`m not wrong and why ;)9 -
Alright, epic throwback to high school
-So I'm taking this CS course on java
-Teacher seems legit
-Knows his shit
-Gets the job done
-Introduces the class to an IDE
-Such wow
-I whip out my Eclipse Oxygen (with Hello World preloaded, obviously) like the nerd I am
-Suddenly:
-BlueJ
-Literally the worst editor ever
-And teacher somehow expects us to work in it with git
WTF.
For those of you who have never worked with BlueJ, thank God you haven't.
/end rant
What new languages should I learn? I'm working on C++, but PHP seems fun...11 -
Getting a new laptop is exhausting if you haven't been keeping up with the technology. I have purchased three laptops in the last two weeks returning the first two after spending 10 + hours each installing updates and software just to find out they didn't work for what I needed.1
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I want to kick this stupid kids ass!
So I'm on a Slack channel for live help for people who are learning JavaScript and I stick around and help people just while I'm by my computer. This kid is on there is constantly asking questions, which I don't mind but I mean I think part of programming is looking up the freakin info to figure it out occasionally. Anyways-
So in each lesson you watch a video ~10-15 mins long and then do an assignment. Well this kid constantly dm's me and asks me for help so I help him. Then as soon as he is done with that lesson quiz, 30 secs later I see him post a question from the NEXT lesson on the Slack channel. I'm like look you dumbass kid, you are going to have to learn this stuff. I mean for shit's sake! He is just on there asking questions for answers to the damn questions and not even watching the freakin lesson videos.
What a waste of my freakin time and effort to help this idiot. Plus there's a test at the end which no one can offer help on. So this dumbass is going to finish the lessons and then not know a damn thing in order to pass the test. I'm pissed that he doesn't even try and I'm over here helping him like an idiot. NERD RAGE!5 -
Virgin media have again told us everything will be sorted in a few hours, with moving the connection.
For their sake they better be right this time as hell hath no fury like a nerd scorn. -
No matter who you are and if i know you, seeing you having nerd stickers on your laptop, especially Linux ones, makes you my buddy.
-
Went to boarding school in England and our physics/maths teacher was a Cambridge graduate. Real bad sense of humor, probably took a bath once a month and wore the same suit all year. Skinny, glasses, clean shaven and ate Marmite and boiled eggs every day. Poster child for nerd world but boy did this guy help advance my math skills and love for physics.8
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My uncle was right, I should've gone for hotel management instead of being computer nerd.
My bartender friends think I'm more successful than them, but guess who's Virgin in his twenties and fixing bugs on a friday night..12 -
Ok so I'm a student so I don't have a boss but man this one kid who is the lead of my programming team. I swear he works with a 10ft pole up his a**. Maybe that's why he is so tall 🤔. Anyways he is a nerd and by far my LEAST favorite person ever. I wish nothing but BSODs in his future. He is a devrant user but I'm not gonna name him to hurt his feelings. *cough* ewpratten *cough* but im.pretty sure he copy pastas 🍝 his code from stack schools and pastes it in our mainframe robot.
#BSODToPratten3 -
"I'll buy the new iPhone because of its RAM"
"What amazes me of my new iPhone is its wonderful processor"
"I bought my iPhone because it let me free to do whatever I want"
- nobody, never
Seriously, have you ever seen someone saying that? Why the hell we nerd post things about how much is technically poorer an iPhone if compared with other phones when actually nobody cares about this? Come on, I'd never buy an iPhone as well, but I don't think this is the best way to change the other people' mind, I'm pretty sure that will increase the popularity instead.6 -
Well, from my pov that's mandatory
Here's the link to original answer :https://quora.com/What-are-the-weir...
1 -
Well that's my first framework... Back when I was a 12 year old nerd who had nothing else to do besides mix and match crappy 240p YouTube tutorials... Now I've upped my game and use 1080p YouTube tutorials 😂🙂
-
>be me a tech nerd
>see sexy women
>try to engage in conversation but only make werid gurgling noises
>never live it down3 -
After falling down the Manjaro hole for months I yesterday decided to leave Manjaro for Pop!_OS. I lose a bit of performance and battery life, I gain a ton of UI polish, I gain a lot of package support, and I lose some hard earned nerd points.
My NAS has an easy to install Debian tool for file sync. I can use Etcher for making bootable USB/SD for my raspberry pi. Firefox is the default browser and I can use all my plugins and password manager out of the box. Apt is easier to use than pacman. Easier Python development setup. Docs are more often written for Debian. (For some reason I spent hours trying to get powerline and oh-my-zsh working right in manjaro’s xfce terminal before giving up.) -
Code editors as Doom skill levels:
coda = I'm too young to die.
notepad++ = Hey, not to rough.
sublime = Hurt me plenty.
vi = Ultra-Violence.
emacs = Nightmare!3 -
when the pm chooses a js library but says can you just change this... either accept the library as you chose it or give a proper spec to write it from scratch
-
Any Ideas for pimpin' our Office?
My collegue and me are looking for some cool Stuff to "developify" our room. Currently we have only a Poster with "Hello World" in several Programming Languages11 -
Buying a brand new laptop, I think I'll save some money and get an i5 instead of an i7 and then turn around the next day and decide I hate money and I love having a computer that's more powerful than I need it to be.7
-
I hate when people say "why do you prefer programming instead of football/sports? " . I like sports but I hate all the super addicted people who fight just because someone said " I don't follow your team".
Is too bad to say that I don't know all the players of a team ? If I say so there will be always someone saying " We know that, you are a fucking nerd.".
Oh well sorry for the angry post. I am more calm now.9 -
!dev (?)
Why does my teacher think it's reasonable to give an assignment for writing a scientific article about quantum computing in the first semester of CS? Like really? I just got out of fucking high school you bitch, all math I know is basic linear algebra. Thankfully I'm a nerd that likes computers so I got the basis of classical computing covered, I can only imagine how my classmates that never touched a computer are holding up.7 -
Just had a complete nerd-gasm as I finally got my gradle plugin script to perform multi-module releases correctly and efficiently
-
!Rant
So I was reassigned from Android to backend a month ago...
Meaning a poor lonely Nexus 5 was just sitting collecting dust...
Saturday night and what do I do?
Go out like a normal person?
*Laughs way too loud*
Nahhhh let's do a pwnie install and start snooping on neighbors!!! -
So my kid tells me that her teacher said my kid could teach the class. I told my kid that was great, good job!
Later my kid is talking to me:
Kid: Nerd!
Me: If I remember correctly. Your teacher said you could teach her class. My teachers never told me that. I think that makes you the nerd.
Kid: <big frown>3 -
brainstorming to do some opensource work in AR (Augmented Reality) and supporting platform. any nerd out there with same task i have......
-
"Oh computer, your real name should be porn funnel. I love my family more than you, but only collectively. on a case by case basis I love you more than any individual family member. "
-Nerd 'robot chicken' -
Ted talks. One moment it is 12:00 the next it is 10pm.
Thanks alot Vivaldi for putting Ted talks in the speed dial.
PS. I'm a nerd. -
In elementary school, when I got my first computer (a 286 with b/w monitor and a whopping 8mhz), I discovered that a .bat file was nothing more than a set of instructions.
So my first "programs" where nothing more than .bat files. Then, at summer camp, one of the instructors noticed I was kind of a nerd, so he introduced me to QBasic. Later on, a friend of my mother showed me Turbo Pascal 6.0. So I was already creating games when I left elementary school.
Then, on secondary school, I stopped most of my programming stuff and was mostly interested in drawing and making music.
But, on college I rediscovered programming with Flash, HTML, PHP and Director. This was around the time that AS2 and PHP4 were still cool.
Later on, in university, I became nerd full on, but still the main focus on web development. -
Real question, not troll. There is debate about it and I really can't figure it out.
Besides having the title software "engineer," is there really such a thing as a software engineer?
In the US, to be an engineer you have to be regularly tested by a regulated governing body, apprentice under another engineer for years, and be certified on a state level. Whereupon you are personally liable for your designs being FREE from errors.
For one thing, nobody can write bug free code, and the idea of being personally responsible for each bug is terrifying.
And two, I've seen news of people calling themselves software engineers in the USA and Canada and getting a cease and desist or sued for it, despite any level of qualification.
I'm sure there are engineers, especially electrical, computer engineers who also program.
But... ?
I don't know, I can't say either way.
That's why I'm asking.9 -
So, I'm bored at work (contract ends in one month and finished everything I could do), so I started searching for a new flat for September.
In France we have a website called "LeBonCoin" which is like craigslist, people post available flats.
But, being a nerd, instead of searching manually (peasants) (and also because I have so much free time on my hands), I coded a web scrapper in Python. It gets all the info (monthly rent, description,...)
So far so good, now need a way to make it calculate the distance between the flat and my next work place (for biking), and the city center.3 -
StackOverflow gatekeepers: "Voting is already communicating." Maybe it is, but in such a minimal way like an error message saying "an error occurred". Sadly this is current UX as well as long as nerds are in charge. Sometimes I feel ashamed to be a developer. Are we human or robots?3
-
I walk past the datacenter where our stuff is on my way to work and I go nerd spotting in their parking place...
17 -
What I would like, do I want to start a conversation?
Sorry...
if let url = URL(string: "devrant://") {
let app = UIApplication.shared
if app.canOpenURL(url) {
//safe, Talk to user
} else {
//don’t start a conversation, or stop it now!
exit(0)
}
} -
Not really comp Sci related but
Does anyone know any good audio editing software my friend wants to start working on getting into the audio industry and I as the tech nerd friend want to help him8 -
Any source code or program to print
selected portion sections of a pdf file on a web page? For example you only wana print some part on a PDF file.... Any nerd out here to help?3 -
how to propose your nerd gf here we go...
"you may look attractive like frontend but you need my support like backend and together we can become full stack developer we can create beautiful projects6 -
that feeling when you want to take off a few days of work to REALLY research Perlin noise and displacement map filters.
-
Tell client we need to add an hour to the budget to test, QA, and proof account/password emails to be sent to over 2000 customers.
They say they tested it and to send now.
Charge them for an additional four hours to test, QA, and proof apology emails because client's api was sending broken passwords.1 -
Sometimes I think I am a weird nerd, one day I was writing something inside Ubuntu VM for practicing some DSP tech with Python environment on my office computer, someone DM me asking for tech support so I have to pause and go to figure it out. I wanna make some version control or backup stuffs to my little tiny cute .py files, so that I can pick it up when I was at home. And I just plugged my udisk in Ubuntu, copied those files to it, and switched USB port control permission to Windows, and finally git to commit. Actually the next time when I continued to write it at home, I hesitated for a while, should I pull it from git or just take out that udisk from my backpack? #IThinkShareFoldersAreUglyAndDirty
#ButWhyDidICommitUnderWindows? -
Hardware Nerd Rant...
Spend nearly a year waiting for a super high end developer laptop. Tricked out MacBook Pro 2016: $4200+, Tricked out Surface Book 2/i7, $3700+
No 32GB ram because of Intel power consumption pre-Cannonlake. Mac doesn't have a touchscreen at its price point...
My gut ultimately says: NOPE.JPG
General hope is for GPU Docks like the Razer Core to come to Apple in 2017. Thoughts?5 -
Probably my room is where I’m most comfy programming because it’s the place I’m most comfortable in general.
I have a weird unhealthy attachment to my room. When I have to leave to go to a friends and some family’s over night or sumn I am really uncomfortable the entire time until I get back.
I know I’m literally playing into the stereotypical nerd, but what you don’t understand is I am the stereotypical nerd.
You could easily say I just get a really bad case of Home Sickness and I guess that is the case but idk why it’s as bad as it is.
And the honorable mention for programming spots was when I was in high school at my big desk I had for 2 years straight. Damn I loved that spot3 -
!rant
You know you're a nerd when you hear a song Weird Al parodied and you start singing the parody lyrics. -
4200 php files with exploit code removed or cleaned and 12 hours of work, and I can cautiously sigh a relief2
-
I programmed an app I've been working on. It sends ICMP packets out...the message I programmed was "One ping to rule them all".
Oh yes, I am the Ping Master ;D2 -
One hour to go and our plane will set off.
It wasn't a good idea to read Homo Faber before this flight.
My German Teacher says he's waiting for a new Film of the book. Instead of this "engineer" back in 1954, you should just a computer nerd xD
I wanna see that1 -
Kinda sounds like a typical nerd, but playing video games. Thinking about all the moving parts in the game causes me to think harder about how I write my code.1
-
(!Rant)
Quasi real-time natural language translation. You guys think it will be a thing in our lifetime? I'm a novice programmer but i really want to contribute in this field. Aside of a deeper knowledge of linguistics, what would be beneficial code-wise if one would learn these things?
On this note; fuck learning Chinese - I'm a lazy nerd 😎2 -
once I heard a joke that a nerd programmer want to have sex with his so called gf, she said if u could post something online and get 10K reply then she will do it.
guess what that dude did?
he post "PHP is the best language ever" on a dev forum
he got 10K reply in 10min, the gf said ok so be it let's do it.
the guy said could you wait, I really think PHP is the best language ever I need to persuade those assholes on this
at last he win the war but lost the sex1 -
'cracking' in our language (Turkish) is using the same meaning with 'to break' verb
+i want a program for drawing something and i searched for it. i found a program name, photoshop. do you have it?
_i dont have its files but if you want i can find
+can i install it myself?
_it needs cracking. can you do it?
+why we broke program? i cant use broken program. i am not a nerd. give me health program. dont fool with me
_?!?!?!?1 -
- What's the mental image of a software developer in your country/region ?
- Is the shy nerd guy who doesn't talk to anybody?
- Why do you think is so?
- Was it your mental image when you started learning it ?10 -
Writing a test helper that handles all the fuckery with DB connections and transactions when the legacy under test uses multiple DB connections is so 👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌
I can write tests for code that was untestable before 💦💦💦
*nerd-gasms*2 -
Arguing about arguable stuff is great; the problem is that a lot of tribal nerd arguments are about stuff that just can't ever be resolved. It isn't about settling once and for all which maker of electronic telephones is best; it's about making sure that anyone who bought a different brand knows that their brand sucks.1
-
!rant
Not entirely Dev related so sorry 'bout that, but I have some form of vacation to spend, where I'll be at home working on my thesis project and preparing my last exam (wooo almost done with the shit). Since most of my friends are away for the holidays and I'm a huge fucking nerd and also somewhat a shitty weeb, can anyone suggest some anime related with tech or coding? I know of ghost in the shell but there are so many I don't know which might suit me. I kinda prefer modern/digitalised graphic styles (common in 2012+ animes to say). Also, girl-friendly to be able to watch them with my gf is a plus but not a necessity. -
!rant
I got an old laptop from my girlfriend that I can use for whatever I want.
As a programmer and computer nerd you can't deny that you wouldn't do anything with it, but what to do?
I want to use it for something, but can't figure out what. Maybe you have some ideas :D7 -
!rant
design related.
By god if M&B bannerlord's ui isn't sexy af now!
They got the perfect design on the kill icons when a user takes out an opponent, great contrast, a couple fonts that do their job to the T and match the experience nicely.
Maybe this is all just nerd shit, but good design always gets me hot an bothered.
It's a significant improvement from the first game.
Got check it out. Music is obnoxious af so just mute it or something.
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
I hate that my class mates think that I am a nerd while I actually consider myself a geek. For god's sake think properly. Nerd is the one who only sticks to the books and all that, gains knowledge but does nothing practically. I am an average student in my class who is into coding, gaming, music, movies and all kinds of fun stuff and I am being called a nerd. Fuck their thoughts, seriously.
-
For some reason I always forget the enctype from forms with file uploads. Spent half an hour today digging through the functions for saving the file before discovering the image want being posted at all. D'oh
-
Most students find their way in damn things. I know time and experience teaches us a lot
It was really so fun but now I can't confront it
Why everyone involves in a relationship? Not worthy at all we all know but still carrying on
Can recall those days, my gang having a good talk time in class every day. No matter boy or girl, everyone was acceptable as a friend, and also neither of our talks were useless
It sucks so much when someone fingers out to find your crush. In my case, I know no one interested in a nerd and also I don't want to be a part of it. Why do those fucking bitches want a dumbass? I actually don't mean to be ace forever but still this teenage fucking too shit1 -
i hate it when Im coding and my friends joke around and call me a hacker or nerd when they couldn't even print anything if i told them how to do it plus its not hacking if you believe its hacking when im typing code on python or c# online then you need to go back to school6
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