*i am a teenager*

*i don't have credit card*

*can't buy anything*

*sees unixstickers is $1*

*pulls out a dollar from physical wallet*

*throws in the air*

*cries*

How to get your money from a difficult client.

Yet another commercial seminar upset I won't give up a day of my time to fly to the UK to speak at the event for no payment or reimbursement for my travel.

But of course I should think about the exposure and networking opportunities! 😕

When you implement a 3rd party payment system, and it doesn't work... and their support can't fix the problem... So you debug their code and send them the revised code and they update their GIT repo and update their documenting.

When you're about to do a payment and the payment form is loaded without an SSL connection/certificate... Come on, it's 2017...

A former colleague made an online shopping app. Boss wanted to promote him to Senior Developer when he still working with us.

14 days ago another colleague checked the code and told the boss that it's ready for production. No one asked me because everyone in the company thinks am the stupid developer of them all.

So what happened?
Well the total value of the cart was being over to payment gateway using a hidden field. Well you know the rest of the story.

The client has sued our company for this issue and boss came running to me and asked me to check if it was our fault or something else.

I checked and found the hidden value where the total value of cart was being stored and send over to payment gateway. The following is the conversation between me and the colleague who checked the code:

Me: So you checked the code and everything was okay?
Him: Yes, all good.
Me: Did you see this hidden field where the total value of cart is being passed to the payment gateway?
Him: Yes
Me: Why didn't you fix this?
Him: What's there to fix?
Me: Well someone can temper the value and let it pass to the payment gateway.
Him: No, they can't we are using https
Me: I' am done with you

He has Masters in software engineering and has few security certificates.

Got the first payment from my client! Cheers 🍻

Dear nerds from all over the world,
We get it. 404 pics are funny.

But did you know there other status codes too?
Like...
204 - No Response
301 - Moved
302 - Found
400 - Bad request
401 - Unauthorized
402 - Payment Required
403 - Forbidden
501 - Not Implemented
502 - Service Temporarily Overloaded

I'm sure you'll also find funny situations with these.
Thanks. We're the best!

I am on nepal and we don't have international payment system. I have been sending email to dev writers for their book as I can't buy it from here and all of them send me their book for free. Its amazing :)

So, here's how online payment works in my country:

1. The selling website creates a hidden <form> and populates it with product ID, price and etc.

2. Some Javascript posts the mentioned form to the bank from the browser.

3. User enters credit info, and submits. If all is right, the bank creates another hidden <form>, and populates is with status code and an invoice ID.

4. Said form is then posted back to the selling website.

I don't know how the programmers behind this scenario call themselves programmers if they don't know basic things about server-side only verifications, but thanks to them I've been buying a lot of products for free these past years. 😂😂

How? 1. Just install Requestly, Tampermonkey and enable Chrome's dev tools.
2. Change price to zero, and the bank's response code to success.
3. Profit!

P. S. I have notified the people behind this, but they don't listen and go fix their codes. Oh well, serves them right.

Response time of different people on Whatsapp:

Best Friend: 5-10 sec
Friend: 1-2 min
Best Friend(Girl): 3-5 min
Girl Friend: 1-2 day 😢
Client(when me solving bug): 0.00005 sec

Client(when me asking payment): *Blocked*

😕😕😕😕😕

Problems of Freelancer

Freelancer: Hey your app is​ ready.
Client : Can you add this ?
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment.
Client: As soon as this gets done.

Next Day...

Freelancer: Hey your app is​ ready.
Client : Thanks. This looks good if there is this feature. Can you help me with that?
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment.
Client: As soon as this gets done

Next Day..
Client : Blah Blah Blah
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment

Frustration at peaks!!!

❎ Client not paid?
✅ Add opacity to the body tag and increase it every day until their site completely fades away

Thanks, I am happy to be sharing my payment details with your company.

ATTACHED TO THE LOGIN DETAILS YOU EMAILED ME!

Your website looks great. I have told my secretary to send you your payment.

Wait, I forgot to check it on Internet Explorer. Give me a second let me check now.

Me: Sir, I suggest that you complete the payment before you proceed with any further tests!

,,,,*

The best I have seen and exploited was years ago with a web shop that allowed me to set my own check-out price by just inspecting the element and setting the desired price. It just happily advanced to the next step where they invoked the payment provider with my custom price. Unfortunately the shop doesn't exist anymore. I have encountered many more security leaks but this one was so easy and lucrative to exploit.

Many people want a cashless society. This is especially useful when:

- you just lost your bank card.
- the banks mobile payment app isn't working at all.
- its Saturday evening.

I'm so fucking glad that I've got some cash left at home and that cash is still a valid payment method 😅

1. A client asks a website.
2. Client pays 50% upfront.
3. I create the site on my server he gets no access.
4. I request rest of payment.
5. Client doesnt want to have the website anymore and tells me to keep the money and he nearly closes his business.

Happens to me 4th time so far.
Not fair.

Wannabe entrepreneurs approach for building their app.

Them: So you're familiar with Android?

Me: Yes but it's been a while, will take some time though.

Them: Not a problem.

Me: So shall we talk about the payment?

Them: Yeah, about that.. Listen, we don't have any funding now but we're sure this idea will be a hit and take off, then later we can pay you.

Me: Ok

*Gets up and leaves*

I made an automatization bot for a big company from my town (freelance). Today I had to shut it down because I've been waiting 3 weeks for my payment (they only had 5 days after finishing development to pay)

Fuck the fucking client, fuck this fucking shit

How to get your long time pending payment?

I stopped the website and then client told me that website is not working and asked me to check what's wrong.

Me: Your cloud server has been disturbed by the recent cyclone, and I won't fix that until I get my pending payment.
Got all the pending payment instantly.

Business idea: panties with HTTP status codes printed on them.

451 for our underaged customers - unavailable for legal reasons

411 to crush a man's self esteem - Length required

429 for girls with stalkers - too many requests

402 for our professional customers - payment required

And, of course, 202 - Accepted

OMG everybody, $Undefined a month is SUCH a good deal.

Got paid Friday. I have just enough to pay rent, car payment and health insurance.

Bosses : check out my new car.

You're welcome.

This is why I switched to Atom lol.

Getting paid for my work.

Just because I'm a student, people assume I'll do everything for free and "exposure", while they make money off of my code

When your in apprenticeship and find a bug that allows the user to skip the payment... that was in production for multiple years...

My insurance company sending me the payment slip by post with my username and password to the online account for easy access. How sweet of them. 10/10 customer satisfaction.

I see your "Storing passwords in plain text". I raise you to "sending passwords via post in plain text".

Client, two months ago: "Where is the new and complicated custom software?! We needed this a week ago!"

Also client three weeks after delivery: "We still don't have time to test the new and complicated custom software. You'll have to wait for payment a little longer."

Someone with a verified payment account actually typed this.

Accidentally left a test line in an API method - the first line returned a 200 OK response.
It was a notification API for our payment portal, so when they complained our API didn't work our logs always said all was fine...

After an hour of listening to our help desk guys saying "everything in our logs says it's fine", I looked at source for 2 seconds, fixed the problem, went home, had a whiskey and went to bed!

Never begin a freelance project without a down-payment -.- 240+ hours in, an eager sounding client, no response for weeks now! What a waste.

Boss told me he couldn't raise my salary, since according to him, I was already overpaid. Months later they suddenly outsource some positions, including mine. I got 6 months with payment as a parachute. But I also got a new job that pays $15 000 more each year...!

It's nice to have double salary for 6 months...

:)

I'll keep it short:
My nastiest freelancing horror stories contain shitty clients who dont pay, the nastiest fucking legacy code you can imagine, and expectations as high as trump thinks of himself.

The lesson is simple: Choose your freelancing clients wisely and always expect partial payment in advance. Even from family or firends!

There was once this customer, which wanted a project done. It was for around 2/3 weeks of work. The arranged cost was 500€, but when I said how long I'll need, he said:
No. I need it done in 5 days. Every day over, I deduct 50€ from the payment.
I was out of the building in less than a minute.
Fuck this type of customers.

I was developing a project that also featured automatic payment to specific sites. I asked for a dummy credit card and he insisted I use the company's credit card. Who would ever want to give a developer actual credit card credentials for development!? I was a junior dev back then. Of course, I failed once. I got told off because I wasted money. My team leader defended me and said this is the risk of having projects with payments. I got proof I asked for a possible sandbox for payment or whatever that will work for development. Almost got fired. Because of that incident, I'm not comfortable working with projects dealing with payment that doesn't have sandboxes.

You can always fucking tell when it is the season of economics student "entrepreneurs", by just scrolling through the job feed - "payment not verified", "$10k", "NEXT BIG IDEA", "I need", ..

Well on my first job we had to integrate payment gateways in client apps for online payment. On my second week in office I published an app on the play store with payment gateway credentials for a different client cause they were there as default values. So the money for one client would go to the other. Nobody noticed it for two weeks and when they did, I thought I had just lost my job and also I would now have to pay all the losses out of my pocket but fortunately I didn't have to cause no transactions​ had yet been made. After that I always checked my integrations atleast five times before publishing. The incident scared the shit out of me but taught me the value of developer responsibility.

I bypassed the payment system on a paying Internet terminal in Egypt by booting into safe mode. I was 14, and there was no other way of getting Internet, so I was really proud of myself 😁

Worked for this client until 4 o'clock at night because they needed that to be done overnight.

For two weeks they are responding slowly like a turtle. No forecast of payment yet.

May God burn them in the worst part of the hell

Me vs a government employee in India...
Me: You should have setup net banking on your website. I had to travel 20 miles to get to your office to make a payment.
Employee: Sir, we do have net banking enabled.
Me: I searched all over your website but couldn't find it.
Employee: Oh! Well, I guess it stopped working since it rained yesterday.

The first paid work I did was to write a program to calculate something mathematicaly for a senior. And my payment was a cup of tea and cigratte

Slowly hide the site until they pay

When told to completely change clients website design (back then, I kind of worked with them), I simply changed colors to a bit darker ones, flipped floats on sidebars (yap, two of them), changed font and increased bold size.

That was all I did and proudly took the full payment.

Oh, and it was done in 30 minutes, last day before we had a skype call for the demo :)

Long rant, sorry.

I’m pretty upset, or let’s say: I want to kick asses and chew gum but I’m all out of gum(The duke TM).

Yesterday we had a discussion in the office about salary basically.

Context: The company has about 150 employees and earns a lot of money. I’m the lead dev for about 1.5 years since I joined.

So I talked to our CEO/HR about a raise since I was hired as a normal fullstack dev(title is lead dev now) but have to:
train my junior(PHP), frontend guy(react), our QA(Automation with cypress atm), our junior devop(gitlab, jenkins, docker) and even assist marketing with GTM and adword campaigns.

I’m a jack of all trades basically since I was a freelancer for big brands for a long time.
I’m fine with helping/training, I like it a lot but I still have to watch everything and be fast with my own stuff. If anything goes wrong, people call me.

That will change since I train them all(They will all be independent soon) but still, doing everything for the same pay feels wrong.

Bottom line: CEO told me it’s cool that they can use all my skills but I won’t get a raise.

The worst/strangest was: My coworkers heard about that(as always in an office) and were like: Everybody should get paid equally because we’re all a team. Uhm, ok?

I just contacted the head hunter which got me that job. I guess I’ll just see what the market has to offer.

It should never be about money but this was confusing. People telling me we should all be equal who are on their mobiles 3h a day and feel underpaid. Check yourself, really.

People who think their pure presence is enough.. Germany -.-

STARTUP IDEA GUYS SUCKS!!!!

So today one of my friend asked me to do an app for him and finally share 50 percent of the profit that I get. His idea is to build an app that can measure air pollution level, water pollution level, soil fertility range. I was like "what the hell!"... The beauty is that he wants me to pay him 50 percent for giving such (stupid, retarded) idea.

Wondering when these "startup idea guys" will realize that ideas are cheap but execution is worth the millions! Fed-up with such stupid people.

Client: Yo, there's like a 30k difference between the invoices in the application and paypal.
CTO: Yeah, that's really sad. Btw, did you know that our payment gateway supports credit cards, which won't be shown in paypal?

I'm writing this in a funny tone, but I was the person who basically implemented every aspect of accounting in that application, so I praying silently 😅

First payment i received for doing someone else's homework. I was staying at a dorm and said to roommates "pizzas! Im buying"

Son of a fucking bitch I forgot to pay the fucking internet bill and now my connection is down until the fucking payment processes.

Fucking shit I can't do a damn thing without internet bruh.

So woke up this morning and Paypal had just banned my account with no reason whatsoever. I only receive funds from 3 clients who I have been working with for a few years now. My account is already verified with my ID and utilities bill. Am a freelance so I depend on it. So it's a case of ' hey, we think you did something wrong, we are not going to tell you what but are banning you permanently and keeping your money for 6 months'. F piss of shit of a company.

PayPal.

Found a nice method that does what you want? DEPRECATED.

Finally got that adaptive payment workflow all figured out? BREAKING CHANGES.

Want to use that new feature with your langs library? UNSUPPORTED.

Braintree isn't much better.

Building a page for a company on the side, they said payment after page is delivered. I said they'd get a finished build, they were okay with it. I also added a couple random errors that will break the site after a month... Am I a terrible person? :3
I will remove the errors after I get paid, of course. :p

Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 1)

ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts

When you are in a hurry to make payment .. and some fucker has done this.

Fucking surprise payment pop-ups in apps!

I've just accidentally bought an app, because it randomly showed the "buy pro version" pop up...

FFS Adobe fix your payment shit, it is fucking stupid

WHAT FUCKING PAYMENT PROVIDER SENDS ALL THEIR TECHNICAL STAFF ON VACATION?!?!?

Leaving customer service to tell me to "wait until they get back... In three weeks"

Unbelievable, I'm actually thinking there are laws and regulations about this if you are providing money handling services, but the sheer stupidity in itself!!

A certain, reasonably sized company had a large in house payment system to handle all their client purchases that was developed many, many years ago. All the devs that developed it had left, and as it "just worked" they hadn't seen fit to get anyone to update or maintain it since.

That was all fine until it suddenly (and completely) stopped working one sunny afternoon.

After paying a small fortune for one of the original devs to come back and look at it, turns out the payment API it was based on had been retired. Warnings of deprecation had been sent out 18 months prior, but they had just been ignored, as the secretary receiving them after the devs left had no idea what it meant.

The company I work for is requiring customers to submit credit card info in an online form which then gets stored into our "secure database". Which employees then pull and charge the card later on. They're also telling customers that the form is "encrypted". This is all because they're too fucking lazy and not patient enough to wait for someone to integrate a payment gateway. This is a lawsuit waiting to happen.

Email to Client: "Thank you for the payment. Attached is your invoice. Would you mind providing a review? :)"

Client 1: "is very very good"
Client 2: "A+"
Client 3: "Awesome"
Client 4: "Good job"
Client 5: "good."

Got a bottle from everyone's favorite payment processor!

Upwork Job post:
I want a small website where you can post product images with title, price and descriptions. It should have a search functionality like amazon. The users must be able to add products it in their cart, post reviews and buy from there. I want it to integrate with PayPal and other payment methods. And yes, i want to be able to write blog post too.

Budget; $50

XD

Freelancing sucks. "A good developer told me this should take a couple hours." Or "I need an Uber like app with built in payment and social integration. We have a $50 budget and it shouldn't take more than a day or two to build." Or "I need a simple game built. Should work on Apple and Android. No budget but we could work out a share of profits." Really wish I had a real job...

Massive payment gateway (not gonna say names) with more then 10k transactions / hour telling md5 is one of most secure encryptions they have. Only to made worse by the fact that they send the key and hashed key in the same request.

I am advising all our clients to change payment gateway asap if they use this one.

Coders get yourself a electronics friend and electronic heads get yourself a coder.

I got a friend who studies engineering and really loves it and i do software development with a passion.
And we both love to chill with some drinks every now and then.

The result: We're currently creating a thing which fills you drinks via a button press on your phone.😁
Optional paypal payment for every drink for use at parties of course.(;

Competitive pay

This has happened to me.
When startups post job they write competitive pay in thier posting.

Then later after interview they off er you $20/Hr.! And thier excuse we are a start up so can't offer much.

Then why the hell did you just throw that word of competitive pay in job description. Just because Amazon and other companies have that in thier posting.??

Don't you feel that competitive pay is a misused term. Almost all job posting have this. I don't get it. What is the competing with ?? MC Donald's ?

P.S. I have 2 yrs experience and worked with a startup and a full time job. And I am not arrogant about it. But when you ask me to do something I am good at I demand a good price. I respect my work.

Sacrificed my Diwali and made a website for my first client and did not get any payment.
I was new and less confident.

Well this is my freelance horror story.

Now I fucking demand money from client UPFRONT.

I got told once that "You don't need pay if you love your job" - what kind of bullshit logic is that? ( I work as a volunteer programmer on a community project, but the game is for-profit and making a fair amount ). People these days...

When client requesting something, it has to be done ASAP.

But when i ask about the payment...

I must sign some documents declaring the job was done

The documents then must be sent to manager

The manager must create another document to be sent to finance division

The finance sent that thing to director to sign the damn document so finance can make a payment

Oh shit the first document before i start the project went missing, i have no idea why they need that

Some weeks has been passed till today

Cant find the document

Recreate the document

I must sign it back but they said no worries, we can advance to next step so i can get paid today

Manager creates a document

Manager sent that document into finance

Oh shit the financial division is having some seminar, its friday so it will be processed on monday

WTF

what the FUCK!!! What's wrong with your heads people!?!? If you write code, write it in application source. NOT IN THE FUCKING DATABASE!!!
Database is a REPOSITORY for entities -- NOT a place to be tangled with BUSINESS LOGICS!

Raise_application_error(-20201, 'Payment already confirmed'); my ass!

Why the fuck is it, that American online companies ONLY ACCEPT CREDIT CARDS

WHY NOT JUST DEMAND FUCKING CHECKS FOR PAYMENT

Boss: We need to disable CSRF and any other form of security, because that shitty, insignificant client has a website that is abomination anyone's eyes, can't pay because of the iframe thingy.

Me: I'd advice against it. This is a significant security issue that just screams to be exploited and there has to be a solution, but idk much about this situation.

Boss: Idk we need to kiss every clients ass till they come. Remove all the security

Me: *Just wants to get home, last one in the office besides the boss* fine
*removes it, deploys and gets the fuck home*

...2 weeks later

Payment gateway: Yeah, we blocked your account, because someone was trying to purchase 30k product in a span of 1h

I'm not even mad about that, but rather about the fact I fucking called it.

* Achievement unlocked: Targeted by scammers

P.s. no major damages, cause the guys from the payment gate understand shit about security.

Got a client who Always delays payment (~2weeks) and is rude and ignores me after I deliver. As a freelancer and Student I rely on the money and on my time. So I will deliver tomorrow the next project, guy promised he will pay on monday, but I count with weeks again. I have developed a locking mechanism so I can lock the whole Software from my Cloud in case he wont pay on time. What do you guys think?

That moment when a new client asks for help with their iPad and you ask them what model it is. "It's an Insignia brand iPad," they say proudly.

Let that sink in. It's a few layers.

Then they want you to set up 2 laptops, a TV and this unknown tablet so that they can talk to each other, with an as-on-tv fake diamond ring as payment.

Let that sink in.

If you want me, I'll be hiding under the couch.

I’m dealing with the worst client I’ve ever had. The project has gone on for way longer than it should, mainly because of them adding a tonne of features to the scope. I should have told them to fuck off but I felt sorry for them because COVID was hitting them hard. So I put in a lot of extra unpaid work to try and get them through it and now they repay me by asking for a refund because they’re now broke?

They blame me for their now being broke when it’s clear they’re broke because of COVID absolutely decimating the restaurant industry. They say that because it took so long to add all those extra unlaid features it’s now my fault?

All this just as I’ve finished the app and am going through the process of releasing it to the stores. I’m probably going to have to take them to court to even get my pay out of them... Thats if they even have money to pay now.

I’ve spent all year trying to get this app out the door only for them to turn around and start abusing me on the phone when things start going down hill for them.

This whole project has been a complete waste of time when I could have been focusing on clients that don’t treat me like shit.

Dfox and trogus I'd love to subscribe but are there going to be additional payment methods? As in, at least some people on here do not have Google play services and although i do, that's solely for notifications, I'd love to remove that stuff.

I might have got my first freelancing gig. It sounds like a really simple thing, might just take one hour or so.

So comes the eternal question from the freelancing noob: how much should I charge?

I'm thinking approximately the hourly pay I get from my full-time job. Does that make sense? Even though it might just take one hour?

This is borderline blackmailing: if I choose to have only the "required" cookies, this non-dismissable popup shows up and I have to wait 10 seconds until it closes. That's longer than it takes me to make an online payment!

FUCK.

Payment provider determining transaction uniqueness based on its amount.

How companies like that survive is a major head scratcher for me.

Embarrassing moment day 2.

I push a fix for a bug just to introduce another more severe bug. (Checkout after payment hanged ~15s)

Freaking out because it's on production. Turn to my lead for guidance, he writes back idk you fix it, you created it.

Found the issue extended from improper class that a function was called again and again that caused a recursive flow.

Fuck me this is a bad week

I asked my friend to design a flyer for an organization's annual dinner, asking her to send me an invoice so I could pay her (I can't design worth shit, she's doing me a huge favor).

She said she'll do it, declined payment, and doesn't even want me to get approval for her to put it in her portfolio...

How the hell do I pay her back for her work? If we lived in the same town, I'd at least take her to coffee and lunch, but she moved states and I moved countries :(

When a client turns on you when it's time to pay... 😑

Working for this startup as a remote dev for last 6 months.

This month they delayed my payment by saying that they are still waiting for crowdfunding payment to be processed.

After 3 days my teamlead who recruited me quitted with 2 more people saying that its 'personal issues'

1 week later (today) I received a letter of termination saying that my contract ceases its effect after 30 days and I will receive my payment after 45 days as all service providers.

I reminded those fuckers that in contract there is a clause saying that they are supposed to pay me within 24 hours of invoice receipt (because this is not my first time with startups). Then fuckers responded that I will get paid as soon as they receive the money.

Contacted CTO today and he told me the truth. Turns out that venture capital that supposedly raised funding of around 10 million usd last year actually didnt raise shit. In the end startup did not receive this funding because VC convinced investors that this project is shit and not worth investing.

VC's plan is to starve out the startup by giving it bridge payment injections. At some point they want to buy out the startup and resell it for profit.

And here I am fucked in the ass. But for some reason im not mad at that VC because shit happens. Im mad ar startup managers who kept us in the dark for 2 weeks and dropped us like shit :)

I am really tired of broke startups and their bullshittery.

So it seems Google got intimidated by WhatsApp's payment feature.

Guess what Google did, they integrated chat functionality to their payment app. 😂

I guess yet another chat app from Google

Got my first online payment => devrant supporter :D

A Bad and Sad Day

Hello Monday,

Client : on weekend site went down for 7 hours? Why ?
Me : Let me check the logs
Client : bla bla bla
boss : check ur code bla bla bla
Reason : Some PHP service stopped on server

Client2 : I have purchased this software and you have to made minor changes
Me : Payment Integrations are not working?
Client : Whataa nonsense is this.. you are supposed to do this
Me : We are supposed to do minor changes. They do not have proper payment integrations. If you want we have to write complete code
Client : bla bla.. I gave you working software

:( Why don't you just fuck off .. liars

Ffs, I just want to get myself a goddamn domain, why is every registrar so shitty? Each of them has a major downside that makes me go away from their site! Bad payment options, way too high prices for a domain after a year, ...

I swear to God if “Microsoft testicle supprt” calls me one more time I’m going to flip. I think it may be time to set up a sandbox and get the fucks to “fix my computer.”

It would be a shame if instead of payment for their “support” their computers became infected with ransomeware...

I know what I’m doing today.

Yesterday I was hanging with the guys from our Records dpt in the staff lounge. Their manager is a pretty nice talkative guy. Everything was going well until this happened..

Him: Hey you, I have an idea for an app. You can"definitely" help me, right? Or someone you know who also does the code thing..

Me: It depends. Just before you tell me about this idea, know that you'll be paying me or whoever will be doing this job unt..i..l *he interrupts

Him: Paying? I thought it was a one time or few hundreds of dollars. Why do I have to keep paying when you haven't finished the app?

Me: Did you finish your entire work this week?...but you're still getting paid next week, right?

Him: Oh crap, makes sense. Ok, how about I pay you the amount you charge then, that's it?

Me: See, you don't get it. I know once the app is done, you'll come back to me to fix and update things. When that time comes, you'll have to pay me again. And with the initial payment, don't just think you pay me and that's all... you'll...

Him: Crap, I have think more and come up with a plan for this.. nevermind, I'll keep you updated.

I think I made him sad knowing that, this sort of things doesn't happen easily.

Client: i want payment integration without using any of those 3rd party gateways like 2checkout.

Me: uhmmm, any reason you cant use those gateways?

Client: its more professional

...

they also take percentages on every transaction !

Me: ... *closes chat*

Just went to book something online. About to click the "Pay" button and noticed the page wasn't secure. Who the hell, in 2017, captures credit card details via insecure 'http'??? And 'https' worked on the home page but not the payment page!! Backed out of that, messaged them and we'll see if anything comes of it.

For some reason, I lost my devRant subscription. No label anymore... but I'm also not charged anymore.

Subscribing again doesn't seem to work, there's a success message from the app, but not from the play store (I have a valid payment method and have other subs), no fees are charged and my account stays unsubscribed.

Has anyone else experienced this?

Client got a cease and desist letter for trademark infringement for using the Moneygram name (not even the logo) on their website in the "accepted payment methods" page.

A few years ago I was working in a startup where the designer was given way too much decisional power (he was friends with the owner).

He had a tendency to keep editing parts of the design during the development phases, so when we had to work on a new big section of the application, before starting the tront-end development, I asked him to confirm that the mockups were final.

He confirmed the design was final and was not going to change.

10 days later, of couse, he sent a new, completely different, set of mockups. The startup owner expected the new design to be implemented without moving the deadline.

(I left that startup shortly after. The issues with the designer were just the tip of the iceberg.
The owner tried to keep a payment hostage to "force" me to sign a new 1 year contract. He backtracked when he thought I was recording the call. I got my payment and left.)

*making payment online*

Website: Your bank wants to verify something. Redirecting to their page

Me: fair enough

Bank: we are increasing security by sending you a security code via text...
*bank redirects me before I can finish reading*

Website: payment successful

Tf kinda security is that???

Accepted a feature request that practically doubled the workload without asking for more money, on account of trying to be fair to a customer who was working through a translator.

Only to get stiffed on 3/4 of the money agreed to in the first place.

Only saving grace was everything was on my servers, so I took him down for non-payment.

8, simply because I'm not payed for extra 😁 and neither I'm gonna accept if proposed with payment, I'm not that much greedy about money and I prefer way more the work-life balance

So, according to my customer, the internal app I just released is "far too aggressive and not overly polite to users".

After querying this the client was referring to validation error messages.

Where I've wrote "Set a payment method before creating the order", the client would prefer it to be ""Please set a payment ...".

I guess it's a fair enough observation, but the client's phrasing made me chuckle :)

*places an order on OnePlus' website for that OP6T*

Alright, payment.. with my bpaid card that I ranted about earlier, because apparently the fuckers accept only credit cards. External payment portal, card's got a chip.. well that's gotta be the same payment process as the usual Bancontact purchases then, right? Where you plug your card into your Digipass card reader, get a start code from the website, type that in, amount to be paid, PIN code, and then it spits out another code that you give to the payment portal.

Except it isn't. That CVC thing is apparently the only thing that stands between you using your card and someone else doing the same with your card information. Not even the card itself! Why the FUCK do we even have PIN codes then?! This is even worse than the magstripe and the skimming issues related to it (the magstripe essentially just blurts out your card information to whatever wants to have it, so demagnetize it and don't use the payment terminals who refuse your card on grounds of not being able to read the magstripe afterwards. Your chip should be responsible for that.. but I digress). Credit cards with chips in it that aren't even used. That's what you Americans use? Seriously?!

At this rate, you can keep your fucking credit cards.

New contract termination clause to be included in all future project contracts: "Contracting client agrees that uttering the phrase 'Your job is whatever I say it is,' or any semanticaly equivalent variant thereof is grounds for immediate contract termination. All work product and IP rights will transfer and assign to contracting client ONLY upon payment in full of contracted payment amount prorated to contract termination date."

There is this client who responds to my project emails instantly but goes radio silent when a payment email is sent.

That moment when you complete your work and then the client gets arrested and sent to jail and you just sit there mumbling "but my payment...."

True Story. Sadly.

Before I start a project,i Invoice first,50% down payment I am very clear about my story.take it or leave it..I am not an NGO

My client thinks Internet Explorer is the only Internet Browser in the world. I argued with her for 10 minutes then I noticed she felt a bit stupid. I was afraid she might stop further payment so I said "I was just joking, you can chill now".

TL: Hey, prepare supporting this type of payment method on the app
Me: I don't see it yet on the API
TL: Just visualize it
Me: 😳

These days are the best days of my life, up till now.

My best friend said yes to my proposal, I got a job at my dream company with higher payment, and no issue at all after my uat like last month.

I hope my codes doesn't ruined my day 😂😂😂

Absolutely SICK of clients contesting invoices, refusing to pay and paying late.

I work bloody hard building websites for these people, often saving their business and doing a huge amount of work they’ll never understand or appreciate. Agree a price and pay it, stop being horrible greedy arseholes.

Arghhhhhhhh

Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 2)

ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts

Extract from a quite old recruiter email (excluding the formalities):

Position: junior dev
Workplace: office for first year, can be changed to remote after (salary will be 50% lower if you go remote though) *suspicion levels starts raising*
Payment: 1€ per line of code (empty lines/comments excluded) or page of documentation *alarms start ringing*
Additional info: on high alert for 4 weeks every 6 weeks *wtf is going on*, salary bonus is 10€ per week *I stopped reading here and moved the email directly to the spam folder*

I was working as an intern at small company, and after a month we signed contract
But each month they had some excuse for not paying me, or any of the employees
So I quit after 3 months without any payment
But I would not have been where I am, if I was not in that difficult condition, it made me work harder, and thought me to always keep my options open :-)

You know what a payment feature that is “so secure even the correct user can’t use it” is called?

FUCKING BROKEN. Jesus Christ I hate it when “customer service” people are trying to sound smart.

Shortlisted hackathon apps:
1. Transmit strings between two phones using sound.
Why the fuck? Why are we reinventing the wheel?
2. Offline payment services app. Sounds cool but is no way feasible in the real world.

The judge of the hackathon was some old PhD college professor who was yawning at the begining of the presentation who didn't understand what was heroku and didn't even bother to listen.
Lessons learnt:
1. Stick to corporate hacakathons
2. Query regarding the judges of the hackathon

Windows being non-intrusive again on the payment device in our college’s cafeteria :)

Did you hear that in the next Windows 10 release even in Home Edition you can go pause Windows Updates for a specific timespan for example during important projects? How do you think about that.

FUCKING IE!
Anyone please remember to ask if the project|s that you're going to work on do|es need Internet Explorer support.
If it's the case just expect any resemblance of modern frontend development skills go backwards into the backward compatibility territory and never going forward.

I'll start looking for another job, can't be bothered for this payment and regressing my dev skills for client needs.
Again FUCK YOU IE!

RSpec:
Undefined method 'agent_authorization=' for #<Periodic::Payment:0x000000C0FFEE>

Rails Console:
> Periodic::Payment.last.agent_authorization = "PPD"
=> "PPD"
> puts "Hmmm."
=> "Hmmm."

Best moment when u receive payment for the work and the amount is more than expected..
U start wondering:
1. Is it bymistake
2. Is he appreciating ur efforts
3. Is it because the payment was delayed last time..
Or maybe because he wants to give u much more work which is very urgent!!

Working on a new payment gateway for one of my customers, and it turns out that instead of just specifying the parameters for what to include in the API call they want you to use their drop-in module for it...which is still written in PHP 4 and hasn't been updated since 2011. Also turns out that they only accept data formatted in XML.

Not insurmountable, but more than I feel like dealing with right this moment...

Management: Add my email(personal) in the bcc of all the transactional mails (which includes forget password, email confirmation, payment, booking etc) we are sending in this project just to check the fucking cronjobs are working properly.

Commit and push to live site without testing on Friday and being super confident about it.

And the payment system stop working on the weekend

I have the best of the very best client on Earth.

A kind who would flat out reject with most depression reviews to our best and hardly committed work whenever an payment installment date is near.

When there are employers that assign you a "test" (low payment) to prove your skills and after you successfully deliver it, he wants to "test" you on another assignment...

Client complaining about payment not working on their webshop.
Turns out client hasn't payed their bills at the payment provider for over a year. Wondering if we should charge them for finding this out.

Best feeling ever..
when you receive your first internship payment.

I hate how Google play always wants me to "complete my account" by adding a payment method
I don't want to okay Google? Do you understand? I guess not because you're asking me all the f***ing time!

"Payment with card is only available at 5 euro or more"

OH IS THAT SO? WEIRD, I PAID LIKE 50 FUCKEN CENTS ABOUT 3 MINUTES AGO WITH MY DAMN CARD. ASSFUCKERY OF YOUR PRETTY FUCKEN ASS IS AVAILABLE ANY TIME BTW YOU MORON!

Meanwhile in Russia one of the most important banks and its online payment services failed for 6 hours because of the broken cable during road works

Management has bequeathed that it shall hit prod tomorrow, the developers cry 'but it's not ready`. Hush little dev for tomorrow we hit another payment milestone

Jajaja a friend of mine told me that he was going to pay me if I helped his father with a small system. He told me he was going to pay me %20 and I only had to do the design... Then almost finishing I figured that he was going to receive the %20 from the total payment and I was going to receive the %20 from his part 😓😓 obviously I didn't finish my part and I didn't give them

Client just said to me "we'll give you a 'speed' payment to deliver the website faster, you just charge us what you think is right". WTF!

Blank cheque time... :)

Today, a few thousand dollars of potential equipment being replaced was prevented by deciding to follow the network cords and finding out that the switchboard had the power cord knocked loose.

Payment was in candy.

Apple: "We're justified in taking 30% of all our customer's in-app purchasing revenue because we've implemented an awesome super-secure in-app payment system"
Me, after spending the last week wrestling with Apple's shitty, horrible, unbelievably obtuse, poorly documented system for handling subscription renewals and having to write my own god damn crypto shite for reading receipts: "You're shitting me, right?"

What a complete scam.

I will give you the money for the server and the domain name (not caring about the conversion rates and transfer charges) and I expect the app delivered in record time. We can talk about payment later.
Note to self: “Never work with people you know.”

My first payment.

three days trying to code magento payment method, our seniors didn't help me (because they lazy), went to other company senior, 10min and everything works...life sucks

Dealing with a Salesforce (what else,heh) bug that caused batch payment requests to be fired off at seemingly random intervals. Pretty big consequences to that one.

Of course, the problem is that no-one assumes it's a Salesforce bug, and you have to spend an eternity proving that it's not your fault...

I used a test user account to make live payment transaction with test wallet money on production, accounting department just called... I think I'm in hot waters!

Deadline in 24 work hours, for a in-house product to automate payment processing.

Why in 24 hours you say? , Me and the accounting guy is going on vacation on Friday.

Will it go into production on Friday evening while I'm going through the door?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

*orders something online*
*proceed to payment*
*ever payment details, click on "Pay now"*
*connection times out*

Oh Lord Jesus please help me I can't bear this suspense.

Client: can you build a website like that for the MissWorld competition and it should have a payment gateway.
Me: what other requirements do you have?
Client: hmmn..just something to showcase our agency.
Me: what's ur budget?
Client: around $100
Me: ** you must be kidding **

Agree or disagree: as a developer guaranteeing your work, when you accept a deposit from a client as a milestone payment, you should not spend that money until the client signs off on the milestone in case they decide your work is unsatisfactory and want to go elsewhere.

How low ($) is too low if u don't have a degree? Cause I got a pay decrease and that was cited as the reason. Even after I told the boss on numerous occasions that Im still in school.

What's the lowest you would take?

I'm currently trying to a finish a project that business partner quoted for and gave me six weeks to write the backend CMS, front end web version of the apps and an iOS and Android app for each including payment integration and the works. It's so over due now and it's taking me all the energy I have not to quit.

P.S My business partner has now left the business leaving me to pick up the pieces :-(

At a previous job I had, there was a bug in the payment code, we did not know anything was wrong until the customer support team began receiving some crazy emails stating that our company emptied their bank account. Then we investigated further and thousands of customers had their banks emptied. So the payment team went big hunting, found the problem to eliminate further chaos.

Unfortunately the person responsible for this huge screw up was not fired immediately, but did resign soon there after.

At my last place we launched a new payment page and added logging.

Who ever set the logging up didn't obfuscate the user card details and stored them in the db for anyone with access to see. :-O

Here's another company hiccup: Get an email from a big online payment company that my account has been suspended due to dubious credit card activity.
Plot twist: I haven't got a credit card!

The feeling you get when client is happy and appreciate your work and just asks for the mode of payment accepted?

Fun fact: Many cloud provider will provide you free credits if you register without adding a payment method or using their services and wait for one or two days.

Customer wants a place to list his products he sells through other sites. He doesn’t have much money, but he’s a referral from a reliable customer, so we arrange a payment plan. We agree on the details, including a place to post his wares.

Then he tells me he wants to post a few thousand items at a time. I decide to throw in a loading system I built for a previous project.

Then he can’t figure out how to add images. Add a way for him to upload them all as a single zip; no good.

Long story short, let myself get conned into developing a full-on Amazon import system that auto-detects several categories automatically AND imports the images. For no additional cost because I felt bad asking for more and we were working through a language barrier.

Third installment payment never comes.

Lesson learned.

How long does it take to actually sign off the proposal and make an initial payment?

Thank god google play supports payment from my phone carrier balance 🤘

So I just got asked for a quote for developing an app for a client's friend. He wanted an app that requires me to build let's just say a combination of what you see on uber with the live tracking of your uber driver, seeing all cars around your location and determining the closest one (It wasn't necessarily cars) plus profiles and another app for another set of users (I can easily make this one and determine the logged in user and in turn tailor the features for that user but they wanted two). An admin portal also was included and I had to do various integrations with Google maps. In app purchases was also necessary. Logs as the app has to keep track of all activities basically. A wallet feature was also to be implemented, scheduling, rating and complains section was also something requested and finally a mini accounting system was also to be developed. I was going to do this singlehandly as a freelancer. Obviously this is a lot of work. I also gave them a timeline of about 3 months for development. Which meant I was going to be putting all my time into developing this. Front end and backend for the app and front-end and backend for the server and database architecture. I charged them $10,000 not only for the work but also because they were going to be making money off of the app. They go "wow and why does it cost so much"...Judging from their reactions I don't think they will move further with this with me because of costs...😂 I can't even begin to wonder why they think that isn't a fair price. I have learnt from previous work before that you always state a cost for which you are absolutely sure you would want to work for else you would start doing the work and once you see how little you are being paid for so much work you end up hating the work and completing it ends up being a difficult task.

Aber method that was supposed to Check If a payment for a (back then) unimplemented payment methode that returns true as a default value...

A Javascript oneliner to skip the payment... Used to be in produktion for years, before I reported it

Well, our client had purchased some inbuilt e-commerce platform and that was assigned to me for customization.

From last one month, stripe connect payment issue was stuck, I was looking into it but no luck, I even updated my boss that I need help from some senior dev. But no luck. Ultimately Today I want to give up on this project, just making my last tries.

And found the issue its just one variable is not set and causing whole payment method to failed:(

huhh.. But Finally relax , Today is deadline of the task. Happy that I completed.

Me: *Wants to install Office trial to use a key to activate it*
Microshit: You're almost ready to use office. But we we need you to provide payment information to use the trial.
Me: This is one more reason to why a metric fuckton of ppl despise you, Microsoft!

Huge mistake on a customer billing procedure.
That procedure was generating a file for automatic billing requests from our customer bank to his customers banks.
That procedure was shifting the bank coordinates by one byte right making all payment requests invalid and rejected.
That month the customer got nothing from invoices (more or less 80k euros).
Side note; only one payment was accepted because the guy entering the invoice on the system shifted the bank coordinates by mistake, so the procedure fixed it.

:/

One of dev I was working with once stored users' payment data in plain text. Luckily enough that thing never got to production.

Posting API keys for a payment gateway with a regular POST form as a "hidden" field

Customer service didn't want to refund a $40 late fee because their stupid website wouldn't accept payment and kept locking me out.
So I did $40 worth of talking to one of their supervisors.
Yep. I fillibustered customer service.

We had this team project to do in my second year at university. In C btw. My team consisted from 3 members. We had about a month or so to finish it. So of course we started 2 weeks before the submission. Well... I started. Those two didn't give damm about it at first but after I pushed them to do something one of them tried to code this simple function. It was supposed to check if the opptions from command line could be combined. His fuction had around !!200!! lines of code 😲 but he swear it was working. I was skeptic so i tested it. waaaaaait for it... it didn't work... the very first combination I tried that should not be accepted passed his awesome test 😱 I gave him another two chances. Result was the same.
I was furious. I had my part to do with little time to test someone else's code... So I desided to code the whole project on my own. Then I told my "coworkers" that they either pay me for it or they will be without any point for this project. I earned 80 € that day 😀😎

Btw my test function for those opptions had less than 10 lines 😁

Imagine you're building an app that users can make payments to each other(thats not the main feature anyway), what payment API would you use? that users won't have to leave your app to make the payments, they just supply a kind of payment id from the api and get paid ASAP

Client: Why was the payment applied to the May invoice?

Me: Because that is the only open bill.

Client: We want to apply it to the July invoice.

Me: What business rules exist to hold an invoice open in order for the payment to be applied to a future invoice?

Client: ...can you manually correct this?

Facepalm.

So I sign a contract for a new app with a client and in the contract we mentioned that a down payment should be payed upon signature. Then when we signed they postponed the payments for 4 days then after 4 days for another 4 days which is next week.

I informed them that the work is paused until they prepare the down payment. The problem here is should i change the contract with new dates or it's fine to leave it as is?

I wish i can only work on my apps.

Why do payment portals never work correctly?
I just wanted to pay for a service (monthly fee, but you can pay manually), and after the very last step, the fucking site just got stuck at a loading circle. 🤨 Now I have no idea if the payment got through or not.

I signed a contract with a company that promised flexible working hours, homeoffice (100%) and no traveling. A month after starting traveling begun. Never had a day homeoffice (even though I only asked for it ONE time. And flexible hours my ass. Should I leave? I mean the payment is ok, not awesome but ok. Plus how those guys work there is a hell of a clusterfuck... Kind of depressed because of this situation :/

Vodafone Quits Facebook’s Libra Cryptocurrency Project

“We can confirm that Vodafone is no longer a member of the Libra Association. Although the makeup of the Association members may change over time, the design of Libra’s governance and technology ensures the Libra payment system will remain resilient,” the Libra Association said in a statement.

“The Association is continuing the work to achieve a safe, transparent, and consumer-friendly implementation of the Libra payment system.”

Ever got so pissed off at a client that their very thoughts can send you into convulsions. they stalk you through every fucking media with changes; facebook, WhatsApp, sms, calls (thank God not devRant) on a never ending project, then you receive an email from them and as you're about to swing the laptop through the window you realize it's payment confirmation :|

Imagine requesting something from a girl/boy you're interested in, and getting replies in Http codes...
What are the funniest?

402: Payment required
403: Forbidden

A platform that automate the payment of bills and worker's salaries through open banking.

Browsing through upwork jobs. Saw a job post where the owner has requested a programmer use his username on stackoverflow and answer questions on specific topics on his behalf. Payment suggested was some $/Upvote.. what the hell!!

Well i am working as an intern at this startup. Initially it was all simple crons and database. After one month one of the founder asks me to map two tables, create an api, integrate a fucking payment gateway and i am now left with a lot of work and confused state of mind.

PS: i am first year cse student

So marketing department what our team to create a payment gateway from scratch, and must use our own programming language...

Personally , create a programming language is good idea but is time consuming and buggy

My partner decided to handle sales/marketing part and asked for 50:50 profit sharing, then finally it came to a mutually agreeable ratio 60:40 share of a project.

On the week after I've made few of the prototypes with modularized codebase. My partner dropped me this, "hey the project is cancelled. We ain't getting any payment"

End up in a way I found out that he's outsourcing some cheap contractors. Well let's wish him some luck! 💩

WHY THE FUCK DO YOU FUCKING RETARDS USE TWO DIFFERENT AUTHENTICATION METHODS FOR THE PAYMENT AND THE CHECKOUT API AND DON'T EVEN DOCUMENT THIS SHIT PROPERLY!! 🖕

Friend: I have a idea that will make us millions!
Me: okay, what is it?
Friend: oh its very simple, what I need you to do is build a payment gateway that supports X billing platforms, Y security protocols, crash proof, blah blah blah... Should be done in a week right?

was trying to book some ticket, after entering every detail at the payment page this happened and there is not even back button. fml

Embarrassing moment of day.

Tell vendor their module does not work out of box.

Follow code through and it requires cc info from payment object after transaction occured. The payment method flushes cc info from payment object right after transaction so info isn't available when vendor code wants it.

Explaining to my teammates what is going on explain to fix would need to add certain transaction results to payment object.

Go on for about an hour and my teammate mentions they rewrote a file which adds necessary info but didn't get called because we rewrote it elsewhere so there is no inheritance chain.

Fuck! I feel stupid. How did I miss that rewrite? I had tunnel vision and didn't check config to see if rewrites existed. Gah!

Email vendor issue is resolved. Hide head under pillow rest of day.

Fuck how

1 tab of a crappy payment site in firefox takes 128% of my CPU ? wtf...

For fuck sake why can't people implement instant payment charges when you order something and not when it gets shipped!

Ordered a board game for about $150 AUD about 3 months ago and my batch was just finished so I just got charged... It's not like a have a fucking trip to Melbourne with some mates this weekend .-.

It can't be that hard guys, charge people when they order and not when it's ready -.-

The worst bug?

Skipping a payment with 20 chars of js

System was in production like this for two year...

My cellphone company sending a text to confirm the bill payment.
*facepalm*

Legal Question regarding E-Commerce / Credit Card Payments.

The User sends his Credit Card Information (number/expiration Date/Safety Number) over email to vendor. Vendor types this info from the email into a Credit Card Terminal.

Is this even legal? I thought when listing Credit Card Payment you have to use a PSP (Payment Service Provider) that conforms to the security regulations etc.

Fuck UPS and their API Documentation. Has anyone here ever integrated their API ?
Their API documentation doesn't mention any sandbox or testing accounts.
If I click on their create access key button, it takes me to a form which requires a real payment method and address which seems like it's meant for real stuff not testing.

Payment gateways are such a big pain to implement. Docs say that they will return values A,B,C but what you end up recieving is X,Y,Z.
And don't get me started on the webhooks, man they return values completely different values from the api end points and with no reference what so ever to the fields returned by them.

Wish i could get the documentation writer's address and may be the dev as well!!

I was logged into an account just now. On the "My Account" page, there was a button that said, "Manage Subscription." I clicked it. Instead of just opening the subscription page, it opened the help page in a new tab showing me how to manage my subscription. No mention anywhere about how to actually get to the subscription page. All I wanted to do was make a payment.