My colleagues treat me like a god.
.
.
.
Nobody plays any attention to my existence until they want something 😏

Boss walked towards his office asking a coworker to do something.
Coworker replied that he'd like to but only the boss has the login codes or something like that.

Boss: ah right *walks to coworkers table* let me enter that stuff *starts typing*
Coworker: Maybe I'm running a keylogger 😏
Me: *exchanging funny eye contact with coworker* yeah maybe he is.... 😏
Boss: *looking back and forth at both our faces suspiciously*
Coworker: 😏😏😏
Me: 😏😏😏
Coworker: 😏😉
Me: 😏😆
Boss: 😐

*three of us laughing*

😆

Pre-holiday working 😏

Yesterday my friend was telling me that he was hacking some federal server in my country, and his girlfriend interrupted him and he couldn't complete the hacking

Such a lier 😏
We don't have girlfriends

Diamond:- Am the hardest thing in whole world.💎💎

JavaScript:- ohhhh please!😏😏

CLASSIC: when there is a big emergency at the office everyone is going crazy and looking for you even under the rocks and you show up at the office 😎😏

What if Microsoft only bought GitHub so they can finally add support for Internet Explorer? 🤔😏

Pssst... do you want some... silicon? 😏

A friend of mine: Look at this nice app I made 😎
*shows me a normal looking app with tabs and different views"
Me: Hmmm… looks good.
Friend: Do you know how I made the navigation between views? 😏
Me: I'm afraid to ask…
Friend: Since I didn't know how to use the piece of code I found on internet, I made multiple views one above another with visibility set to false, and during the navigation I just change the visibility. 😁
Me: WTF? Man… this isn't something you should be proud of… it shouldn't be done.
Friend: Do you also want to know how I backup the code?
Me: No…
Friend: I send it to myself via email.
Me: FUCK!
Friend: I also never use while loops, I prefer to use for instead with a break inside. 😊
*blocked*

Typical 😏

Old but gold. Which one should I use for my site? 😏

So keep things simple and use flow diagrams

Life suddenly became less complicated. Thanks devRant 😊

Since one of my colleagues had a difficult time saying/spelling the word SpamAssassin, it's now officially (in our office):

Spam Ass Ass In

😏

If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail!

This was something which my tech lead used to tell me when I was so obsessed with nosql databases a few years back. I would try to find problems to solve that has a use case for nosql databases or even try to convince me(I didn’t realise it back then) that I need to use nosql db for this new idea that I have, without really thinking deep enough whether the data in question is better represented using an sql schema or not.

Now, leading a team of young developers, I come across similar suggestions from few of my team members who just discovered this new and shiny tech and want to use it in production projects.

While I am not against new and shiny, it’s not a good practice to jump right in to it without exploring it deep enough or considering all the shortcomings. The most important question to ask is, whether some of the problems you are trying to solve can be solved with the current stack.

Modifying your stack requires more than just a week’s experience of playing around with the getting started guide and stack overflow replies. This is something which need to be carefully considered after taking inputs from the people who would be supporting it, that include operations, sysadmins and teams that are gonna interface with your stack indirectly.

I am not talking about delaying adoption by waiting for long list of approvals to get some thing that would bring immediate value, but a carefully orchestrated plan for why and how to migrate to a new stack.

Just because one of the tech giants made a move to a new stack and wrote about it in their engineering blog doesn’t mean that you need to make a switch in the same direction. Take a moment to analyse the possible reasons that motivated them to do it, ask yourself if your organisation is struggling with the exact same problems, observe how others facing the same issue are addressing it, and then make an informed decision.
Collect enough data to support your proposal.
Ask yourself again if you are the one holding the hammer.
If the answer is no, forge ahead!

Internet is down at work, I love being paid to do nothing 😏

A substring problem? Here, have 3 nested for loops 😏😏

Collegue: hrrrrrrrrrrrrr *mumbles something*
Me: Rawrrrrrrrrr (the sexual'ish kind)
Collegue: Hmmm what?
Me: Miaaaaaaauwwwww 😏😉
Collegue: Duuuus.... (English something like "sooo...."
Me: x x x x ("kisses") 😏 *😘*

(I know I can do this with him for the record)

The collegue who I hang out with has resigned.. we together were known as the only Innovators of the project... Now suddenly My manager's behaviour towards has changed... He has started to treat me with real care as if Inam his son... 😂😂😂 The bastard is thinking I might resign as well 😏😏😏😏

everyone knows the boss 😁😏

So I'm 6 seconds behind devrant servers 😏, who's has the correct time...

this one is deep 😏

When I was in high school, the IT had the bright idea to use the same username/password for each machine in our site, and there was this jerk who knowing this, would occasionally SSH into the computers of the other classmates and wget porn mp4s to their home directory to embarrass them, as some sort of weird-ass prank.

So, in order to give him a lesson, I one day had logged in and set a rule on the class' router to forward all port 22 traffic back to his own IP address, and had SSHed into his machine, aliasing wget with a full-screen kiosk mode chrome, followed by a force disable of the USB HID devices.

It might have been less awkward and he might have seen less scared, if it wasn't for the fact that I had also remotely set his machine to maximum volume, and the teacher wasn't in the middle of a lecture. 😏

To this date, his expression is the most precious reaction I have ever seen.

Hey girl, are you Visual Studio? 😏

Cause you make me want to fucking kill myself.

Story time!

My exboyfriend used to code in php 5. It’s his favourite programming language, and I hardly teached him how to code in Python.

One day, I said to him: Hey schatz, let’s go to the sex shop ...
He: Oh yeah 😏
Me: ... and buy an elephant thong 😁
He: What?!
Me: Yes, a blue elephant thong for Php

Me laughed

Me: So?
He: No way!
Me: Please!!!!!
He: Ok. I’m working at a cultural events web page. When I got my first client, we’ll go to the sex shop and buy the “php thong”.

Well... I broke up with him before we could go to the sex shop 💔😂😭( for another reasons, not for the php thong, obviously)

Do you have any funny story like this?

devRant unofficial UWP v2 doesn't look bad on MS HoloLens, I guess. 😏

Remember that 😏

Force Push Pitfalls😏

I found a duck today and just had to put a little cape on it 😂
I guess you could say..I really want the d 😏
Sadly I could not convince it to become my companion 😭

Ooo, nice number 😁
Come to think of it, how many people do you think have it as their password? 😏

We got married and started our relationship at 1.0. After our first argument, we managed to patch things up, so it wouldn't all break down: 1.0.1
Same night, I suggested a sexy new feature, and we worked up a good sweat implementing it together.
I got too excited and released prematurely: 1.1.0
After that, she was a bit cross, but then I suggested a hotfix. She agreed and got right on top of it. After a few minutes she finished and managed a release as well: 1.1.1 😏

When I take a break from ranting, this is where you can find me.

Xcode humor.. 😏

Is devrant GDPR compliant? 😏

She: I have a problem with my android phone, I can't take screenshots since yesterday.
Me: Ehm... did you try to turn it off and on again?
She: no.. let me try.
...5 minutes later...
She: You're a genius!!!
Me: I know. 😏😎

A friend shared this with me, went to the website to save the image and saw this dialog 😏

But but.. MacBook Pro 😬😏

There goes my Sunday 😏

Me in the digital circuits class: "Bro I just got a pick up line in mind!"
Friend: "Go on.."
Me: "Girl, are you a boolean signal 1? 'Cause you turn me on 😏"
Friend: "I can't believe I'm your friend."

Once I used to wonder how youtube made money.
Now every time I watch a youtube video I am reminded how.

We all once printed "Hello World" & were acting like a pro 😏
Cheers, we all made it till here, more than "Hello World! 🍺

PM: I spoke with x client, they really like x feature and want to continue.
Me: great, I'll let the team know.
PM: Yeah, I told your team already.
Me: Oh. What did they say?
PM: They all told me to tell you first, so you can tell them.
Me: 😏

If you're a security guard at the Samsung store, does that man you're a guardian of the galaxy?🤔

My girlfriend asked me to take her to somewhere she hasn't been when I asked, 'where do you wanna go for anniversary?'
So I took her to Github.com 🤣
Trust me, I had to pay a big price for that joke! 😏

Just uninstalled Tinder.. It was taking away my devRant time😏

When you spend a weekend building your custom rig, but the inner fanboy conscience takes over 😜

I know exactly who will like this pink accent 😏
I like this devRantron update :D

Girlfriend asked me to take the spider out instead of killing it, i did! Really nice guy, bought me a beer and told me all about how he wanted to be a webdesigner 😏

After the face reveal and the hand reveal... Let's do something spicier! 😉

Guys, post a pic of your "private member"...
Gals, post a pic of your "closure"... If you know what I mean 😏

Mine's in the comments

Drunk Dev 1: These wifi signals are really take toll of brain tissues and may probably cause brain cancer. 🙁

Drunk Dev 2: Let’s power off our wifi router. We don’t need wifi while drinking. 😏

Drunk Dev 1: Good, but what about other wifi signals in proximity. Your neighbours ?? 🤨

Drunk Dev 2: Oh poor, they wont get into our brains as our brains don’t have password for their wifi thus, we can’t connect to their access point 😎

Drunk Dev 1: 😳

My friend brought me a simple python problem. He expected the output to be 2,2,3... instead of 2,3... I didn't know python, but with a quick tweak to differentiate the two prints, I understood that the range() function is exclusive.

Before coming to me, he asked his senior dev & that guy just said - "Oh, your editor has a problem". 😐

Not so fast .DS_Store😏

😏
#DarkThemeFTW

Today 🙄
This dev goes "I connect using plain FTP over a VPN to update why can't you!?"

Because it's unsecure you fucking idiot.

His FTP server can't even do secure connections. Some how.

Guess I have a new site to take over 😏

🤣😂😏

I want to print this pic out in enormous size and qty, hang them in many classrooms to show my female friends that it's normal to wear cute skirt and cute shoes while wringing cables on your shoulders.

😏

I thought meditation was more like putting myself in “airplane mode”. But in reality it felt more like a DDoS attack!

The last 5 months have been tough.... My boss ( who was a close friend) quit and I become interim department head... Trying to run a team who didn't seem happy I'd taken the reigns.

At the same time my wife's ongoing battle with her anxiety had gotten worse and she really needed my help with everything possible at home..

In March I was confirmed as the HoD but I was still doing 3 to 4 days a week on client delivery, trying to support all presales activities, manage a team of 10 people, travel for work and support my family....😩

It really got to me and I was close to breaking... The worry of not replying to an email ASAP no matter what time of day would eat me up, working late every night... It got too much and I was running on fumes with my weekends just me completely wiped out and useless to the family. 😓

.....But.....

I had a escape last weekend to a 🍻 beer 🍻 festival with friends that I was considering not going too and just losing the money but the wife made me go...

And it broke me even more... So much that its somehow put the pieces back in the right order in my brain and snapped me out of my major rut!

Somehow, sitting with friends, making stupid jokes, drinking way too much and blocking out all the work crap gave my brain the hard reset it needed. 🤟

This week I've come back a different person ( wife's words) work is a breeze, exciting and encouraging.... 👊

I can't get enough of playing silly games with my kids all night

And couldn't feel any more positive about things if I tried.... Set that spark back for my wife too! 😏💏

So.... After that long rant 👀

Tl;Dr - work and life got too much... Close to giving up... Too much beer with good company gave me a hard reset and I feel like a new person.... 👍

Plus the team is now loving the new direction and strategy too 👔

Who says drinking is bad for you? 😂🍻

😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏

Team: Qt doesn’t let us build the UX we have in mind. Web is the future.

Me: what do you guys recommend ?

Team: Electron! We vote for Electron!

Me: Alright, who know JavaScript here?

Team: ...

Let me Google Translate it for you..
😶😏

Going to system engineer interview expecting technical questions. Very nervous.

First 'technical' question "what does DDoS stand for?"
Second "what does LTE mean?"

😐😐😐🙄🙄😏🤣😄😅😃 Gonna nail this interview.

Earlier I signed up on this forum called NulledBB. Basically some hacker skiddie forum that had a dump of an archive I wanted, unfortunately behind a paywall which I didn't want to bother with.

On signup I noticed that I couldn't use my domain as an email address, as I usually do (the domain is a catch-all which means that mail addresses can be made up for each service I sign up to on the fly, super useful). They did expose the regex that they accepted email as however, which included something along the lines of "@live.*".

So I figured, why not register a subdomain live.nixmagic.com real quick and put that into the mail servers? Didn't take too long and that's what I eventually went with, and registered as somepissedoffsysop@live.nixmagic.com (which I have no trouble putting on a public forum as you'll see in a minute).

Still didn't manage to get that archive I wanted but I figured, fuck it. It's a throwaway account anyway. But eventually that email address started to receive spam. Stupid motherfucker of a forum operator with his Kali skidmachine probably leaked it.

Usually I just blacklist the email address in SpamAssassin by adding an additional spam score of 100 to email sent to such addresses. But in that case it didn't even sit on the main domain, thanks to that stupid regex block from earlier... 😏

*Logs into my domain admin panel*
*Le rm on the live.nixmagic.com record*

Null routed entirely.. nulled, if you will! 🙃

Everytime 🙄
Client: it's not working.
Me: what isn't
Client: the app video and link thing locator
Me: device and spec ? Like I always need
Client:iPhone
Me: yes. What one and what version of iOS
Client: urm 6s iOS 10 something
Me: great 😏 not broken for me
Client: well everyone is complaining so we need it fixed.

What can i even do now 😐

😏😏😏😏

Perfect security !

Seriously why hasn't anyone made a coffee brand just for devs called "java" .. So we can show some superiority over the simple folk drinking coffee..
😏☕🍪

Someone tried to push a patch in prod while demo was going on in front of CEO.

Good thing they locked the repo before the demo. 😏

Rant! ✋😜👍
When a rookie is trying so hard to behave like she is a god damn expert in programmng! 😏🙊🙈

Not sure if happy or sad

Mate - whatcha doing ...
Me - oh just hacking nasa
Mate - seriously!? 😯😨
Me - OOOOh yeah I do it all the time see (shows similar photo)
Mate - don't hack me 😭
Me (in head) - you poor dumb fuck...
Me irl - I won't if you don't piss me off 😏

Rant for Indians

Who the hell gives you joining in the Diwali week. Half of the office has taken holiday so that they can go home. My orientation/induction might also get cancelled because of lack of personnel. And her i am stuck in a new city away from home for one of the major festival in India.

Oh mum...
My mum comes to me asking "What's happening on my phone? What's this little thingy?" (typical question)
*looks at (android) phone*
*sees downloading icon*
Me: "It's downloading something..."
*pulls down notification bar*
*I see Facebook app updating*
Mum: "What is it?"
*3 seconds later*
"Oh it's the Facebook"

Took her literally 3 seconds to recognize😅
Love my mum though😊😏

I don't know why quiting vim is such a challenge for new users.
While Quit starts with q , so q is very logical for quiting 😬

If c++ is so good, why isn't there a c++++ or c++2? 😏😏😏

I heard we were showing off server specs 😏

My Razer laptop died due to a hard drive failure so i filed an RMA. They didn't have the replacement part in stock, so they're replacing the laptop all together. Mine is a 2019 model with a 2060, but the current equivalent model has a RTX 3070, so I'll get that instead. I'm not complaining 😏

Math everywhere.....😏😩

CODING CODING CODING HAHAHA I LOVE PROGRAMMING BEING A LITTLE CODE SLUT. I LOVE SILICON VALLEY IM SUCH A QUIRKED UP LITTLE CODE SHAWTY LOOKING FOR SOME ALGOASS 🍆💦😩.

“Slams fists on keyboard”

I LOVE BEING A CUTE SCREEN TWINK, IMPRESSING PAPI CEO WITH MY FINGER COMBINATIONS. I LOVE PLEASING EXECUDADDY. 🍑😏🫦

“Takes keyboard in hand and slams it against desk until keyboard keys explode everywhere”

I LOVE WATCHING THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND CORPORATE AMERICA FUCK MY ASS IN RETURN FOR PERSONAL PROFITS. 🤑☔️

*digs fingernails into the wall and claws off paint and then snorts it”
*pees and shits pants*
*cries in corner with extra agony*

when you Christmas af and hope finally one day play #portal3 😏

Started counting from zero 😏

Wanting to push the code to remote at 3am and just hit the bed.. Appereantly bitbucket has other plans for me 🤷‍♂️

Also chuckles to them for still running python 2.7 on their systems 😏

I was reading devrant.

Obviously I was laughing while reading different rant's.

My curious friend

F: what are you reading? Look's something funny.
M: devrant
F: what?
M: it is developer's community.
F: show
*After reading few rant's*

F: 😪
Nothing interesting

M: don't ask me again about your pc , mobile, software issues
😏

For people who don't want kids being sterile is a feature not a bug 😏

Finally got the amazon fire 7 !
Reading books from my phone was quite bothering.

Stackoverflow down for maintenance ⛑

I guess I'm screwed then

😂😂😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏😏😏😏😉😉😜

Got a java exams today, got to code on paper and it really annoying. 😏😏

yes i fixed this bug😏

I'm a newbie in programming, just past the very basics and all. Which is why I am a bit frustrated when i see programmers use stack overflow. I barely even understand it.😏

That awkward moment a comment on your rant gets more ++ than your rant😏

Since I just bought a mystery bundle of steam games and received codes for games I already own.... and I'm in a good mood ☺️

I will drop the keys into the comments section for anyone who wants to take them.

Games:

- Star Wars - Knights of the old republic 2

- SimCity 4 Deluxe Edition

Leave a comment once you use the code 😏 don't be a dick!

I saw an article saying, What Programming Language Should I Learn First? 2017

It suggested, JavaScript!

😏 hmmm....

What do you think, yes or no?

(And no this is not personal question, just an article I was reading 😃)

I booked one domain for my client.
Which is mi*****.***

Now he want new domain with following change

Mi*****.***

😑🙄😏😥

yeah, of course 😏

Needed to convert a collection of .avi videos to .mp4. Online converters only allow 1-2 videos at a time, with slow uploads, so no option.
Can't find a program that quickly fulfills my needs. Interesting ... 🤔
Look for python and a quick and dirty solution, ffmpeg and subprocess it shall be then.
Install ffmpeg, run subprocess with ffmpeg, put it inside a for loop, iterate over all videos with their respective number. Done.
3 lines of code, saved some time.
It's great to be a developer (sometimes).😏

So I am going to talk about interviews from a different perspective, the being on the question side of the technical interview.

We have had four interviews for a single Senior Dev position. I threw some very hard questions at the people and some very easy ones. The thing that amazed me was that people actually went for an interview when they where woefully under qualified.

The latest in this list was someone who didn't understand how inheritance works for object orientated programming, and when I asked him something very specific he needed to look at his notes...

The person that I felt did the best on the interview was the person that didn't have every answer but said clearly that he didn't know and talked about his ability and desire to learn. The people that failed the worst were the ones that were certain, arrogant, and wrong.

Technical interviews are fun 😏

So I’m thinking this is one of those apps I wouldn’t mind having Touch ID on or some form of 2FA 😏

What do you say guys?
@dfox, @trogus

Project Details 😏

A girl takes less time in getting ready as compared to windows 10😂😂😂
#WeekendHumour
#myOriginaldontCopy😏

Decided to delete devRant and reddit for a few months. Now I'm back, and the first thing that greets me on both is Light Mode 🤢

Thank God that I haven't cancelled my devRant subscription. Once you go black you never go back! 😏

had wished for a raspberry pi as christmas present, ideally with a pi cam on top.
now i've got a pi cam😏 ... and no raspberry pi😐🤨😅
that was unexpected

Ask a developer to code entire night

Developer:
😏🤓No Problem. I was born to play with fire 😤😎

Ask a developer to complete the associated documentation in next couple of hours

Developer:
😳🤬🤯 Better call the devil to take me to hell 😱🤒🥵

My Friends: Celebrating XMas together
My Family: Celebrating XMas together
Me: Celebrating XMas by reading MongoDB docs 😏😏

There is no better way to celebrate xmas

It seems like the project I'm tasked to tweak last edited when I was 4 years old... 😏 I doubt is there any dinasour alive who used that generation's technology. :P

When they want a live app in two weeks 😏

When you spend your day building a dark theme on stylish instead of doing your day job 😏

Ah the life of an easy day.

I shall sip on my pina Calada before the shit hits the fan tomorrow... oh wait, that's a public holiday🍹🧘‍♂️🏖

In my wallowing experience as a freelancer I've noticed that almost all C/C++ clients are perfectionist. You just can't please them by getting the job done quickly.

I got a libcurl job from one the other day to scrape data from a target website and within an hour it was ready. I notified the client and he was both amazed and confused assuming it would take the whole week.
C++Client: The code works but you need to take your time.
Me: Sorry?
C++Client: Yes, it works but you used "string" instead of "wstring"
Me: 😊 Oh okay... *converts strings to wstring*
C++Client: And also variable names should be more descriptive.
Me: 😏 *int foobar => int very_long_descriptive_foobar_01*
C++Client: And also use "shorts" for page nums it'll save some bytes
Me: 😕 *int => short...*
C++Client: And also use forloops instead of whileloops
Me: ☹️ *whileloops => forloops*
C++Client: And also use -- instead of ++ in loops
Me: 😤 *for(... i++) => for(... i--)*
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
C++Client: And also...
===> Seven "and also" days later <===
Me: *completed 10 Java projects behind the scene*
C++Client: And also use pthread instead of thread
Me: 😧 It's day 7 already!
C++Client: Oh I see, great job. You can compile and send me the archived source.
Me: 🤩
C++Client: And also...
Me: 🏃💨

Coincidence?? 😏
Look at the number of ++s

Hi! 😀 Great to meet you!!! I hope you are having a fabulous day 🐝. My name is John Doe 👔 at the TechyHelp 🤲 company. I know I might not look like much 🤪, but I will do my very best to make sure 🫵 YOU get my best service 👨‍🔧 to your hearts content 😌. I am sorry that this problem has been causing you pain 😥 it must be so awful dealing with this 😖 I can’t even imagine 🫣. I feel for you deeply 😮‍💨. It is my duty 🫡 and I will make sure to give you exactly what you are asking for and more. I am aching 😩 to satisfy you so you don’t feel anymore pain. I want to give you 🫴 so much pleasure today 🤤 to make sure you never have to think 🤔 about this problem ever again 🥰.

Upon applying some of my sleuthing 🕵️‍♂️ skills to use, I found that to restart your computer, press and hold Alt + F4

Let me know if this solves your problem!

I really hope I entertained you today 🥺. It is my pleasure ✨ to give you the most satisfaction possible, and I love that u came to me first 🤓. I know sometimes these problems can get built up 🥴 and really explode 🎊 💦 when you least expect it. So I hope I relieved some of that pressure today ☺️.

If you enjoyed my performance today, we would love to hear your feedback! 📝 Please sign up at the form below so that we can call you 📱 and hear about your experience 🌝. You can also take the 69 question survey on how well I serviced you today 😏.

Have a blessed day!
Stay safe!
Hope your life is amazing!
Happy pride month!
Peace, love, unity, respect!
Hugs and kisses!
Thanks a million!

- John

I switched to vim as a main IDE (yes IDE) just so that common people can think I'm a fcking wizard seeing my dusty trackpad... And also to see their face when they try to show me their programming talents on my laptop 😏

Soooo it's Monday........ 🤯

@C0D4 started the day fixing current projects defects (4 tickets smashed before coffee 💪)

Then after coffee, run a test coverage report and see a significant decline over the past few months, so spends a couple hours adding more tests to get some areas filled in - meh, nothing like 50+ lines per test... to test a if() statement but whatever - complex scenarios will be complex to get too, but no my tests break and I'm missing data I didn't know about🤦‍♂️
So let's comment all that out, and go to lunch ... mmmm lunch.

Get back, start working on those again, and then get handed a new issue, so comment that all back out again, ( ok I know what you're thinking, but I'm working in an environment that does not use git for deployments - don't ask, real pain in the ass I haven't had time to invest into yet - but as code versioning only) anywho, starts to workout this new issue but don't figure it out, enter a 30 minute meeting.................. yea that was 2 hours later but was a very practical whiteboard session only to work out I have something like 16-20 weeks of work over 4-5 projects to get out in like 6 weeks... hahahahahahaha fml..... oh and that's excluding another project which had a 6 weeks of work in the pipeline to get to somehow.... I'm not seeing this one happening, and probably conflicting projects needed on top of that down the track... but we'll leave those out for now!

Whoot is fucking home time!!!

🤷‍♂️I'm starting to think I'm like a team of 5-10 devs right now, maybe I should start asking for 5-10x more 😏

#letsBringOnTuesday!!!!

That sweet feeling when you get response status 200 and everything works just fine 😍😍😏

Driving to a family friend after work to check his wifi connection issues.

Turns out that she didn't knew about the hardware switch to turn it on and off again... 😏

Not All... But Many 😏

Perfect for continuous ingestion/digestion 😏👌

True though 😏

What else can be asked in Ruby on Rails interview? 😏
Whats your salary as a rails dev? 😏

I am good to the programs I use.
I give the all the needed ram.
Except Android Studio, I don’t have a fucking server.

Me after debugging for 2 hours and fixing a semicolon error.

I just installed nginx on a new server, just to find out we have visitors waiting patiently at the door. I guess they must have tried all possible route to get inside an empty room. 😏

See logs hits on 404 files...

Imagine going on a rope course with zip lines, then to a vineyard and winery for a wine tasting, to finally arrive at the hotel where there is an open free bar and dinner served. That's what I call a company trip 😏

it's Eid here 🎊🎉
this is POC so fare 😏

Honestly, mentoring is in my opinion the best part of the job. My firts mentee was a student in my last job, smart af but lazy and unable to trust in herself. I wasn't really too sure in myself at the time either but since I had to teach hery craft there was no place for me to doubt myself.

So I taught her everything I knew and in turn I learned to trust myself and once I had mastered the art of self confidence I could make her believe in herself. Since then I trained five more test automation engineers, some of them might be close to surpassing their 'master' (though won't make it easy for them 😏) and with every Single one I've developed a deeper understanding of my craft by explaining. I needed to research stuff I never questioned to answer their questions and therefor became better at what I do.

Three weeks ago I got an email from the girl I first mentored, she's in another company now and she thanked me for what I taught her. In my opinion I did a rwally Bad job at it (it was my first time teaching) but reading someone actually believing that one made an impact in their life is something special.

I always loved talking about my craft and I love sharing the knowledge I aquired. Test automation is not a thankfull craft but I'm always happy whenever I can interest someone in it and I fully enjoy seeing them grow and improve into fully fledged TAEs.

Person:"you're a dev, you must reeeaaaly get frustrated with semi colons 😏"
Me: "at times but it's not such a big problem with the compilers being better now.😊"
Person: "so innovative!😁"
Me: "nothing is innovative!! All new idea app ideas suck and there are not too many clicks!!! The icons are perfect!! Purple and orange buttons are not a good idea!!! What do you mean you want 3 buttons on the one screen that do the same damn thing!! Do you even think!! Oh of course the users are stupid, takes one to know one!!! Doesn't look like much?!!! Sure the backend is a mother fucking kraken the size of Michigan that runs smoother than a babies bottom but hey, let's bitch cause it's too plain on the eye!!! EVERYTHING IS A LIE LIKE THE EXISTANCE OF YOUR BRAAAAIIIN!! - pants neoriticly-😳
Person: "new client? Or friend with an idea? 😒"

From this day onwards I'm following this technique

Startup companies be like "we are hiring full stack developer"

Full Stack Developer = the entire IT department 😏

Already 3/4 with PRs for Hacktoberfest 😏

This stuff brings me back to the days when software used to be fun and not driven by absolutely clueless clowns in big-wig management clowntown. 🥲

What's this about ? Someone likes me wahey 😏

I just managed to configure a second keyboard to map its keys to separate keycodes. Basically, I should be able to use it as a complete macro deck 😏 Thank god for Linux

What's the funniest combination of commands/keywords/variables you've seen?

I'm a big fan of "man touch" 😂
Also, a colleague named an instance of System.Threading.SemaphoreSlim to Fatboy (Fatboy Slim, get it? 😏)

Let's hear it!

edit: tounge twisters are also welcome

Translates to : Tester doesn't die due curse of a programmer 😏😎
.😂😂

Tabs and spaces is one thing. How about WinRar vs. 7zip? 😏

I broke the system!

This rant has the same tag twice, because I manually added the one that would be added by the category I chose 😏.

CC: @dfox

When the spacing is fucked (in the ass 😏)

So, I was able to hack into a local business (legally) in under two minutes today... great and scary right? Get this, it was from my iPhone. All switches were still the default username and password... after seeing that they didn't think anything was wrong and didn't sign the contract... imagine what I could have done with my laptop and my PWNtools...

Fuck it, more (l)user data for me to log.😏

Now that I have a ++, I changed my BG Color so that it looks nice but I think we need a full color picker now.

BTW @dfox any ++ privileges on this? Maybe you could add my Drafts feature 😉😏

I haven't got tape to prevent my dinner from opening, but hey... trust me, I'm (almost) engineer 😏

That feeling... when it's weekend and you have an awesome idea to start with 😏

To all the Ubuntu users... Couldn't install Debian,uh?

jk 😏

Guess who has 2 thumbs, half a brain and lost his job today...

The motto 😏

programming like a boss 😏

Penetration test 😏. Is there any other kinky term you know in computer sciences? Spill the beans.

Which one's your favourite IDE 😋?
Intellj vs Eclipse vs Netbeans vs Xcode vs other?😏
Mine is Intellij.

It might seem stupid but lets do a thread with our watched. I wans never interested about those little accesories until i got mine a few months ago and now i wear it everywhere 😃

True gamechanger when talking about exams and dead battery situations as it has some machanism of charging itself without using batteries and it gloes in the dark 😏

Fml I need a job

I DID IT! I got my first co-op job!! I’ll be starting in the fall and I’m super excited 🤩
Finally I’ll get to do real work and I’ll get to see just how far schooling has gotten me.

Gotta admit I’m a tilt bit worried I over sold myself in the interview but we will cross that bridge when we get to it 😅

I’ll also finally have some real rants soon enough 😏😅

This moment when you help your friend with data conversion code 😀.

By converting "super" mathlab script into real C# application so you don,t need to read the whole freking 1GB file into RAM and writing it into another 1GB matrix in order do save the result because mathlab is crap 😤.

Then that feeling when you want to create better mathlab from scrach in C# and you are actualy succeding 🤔.

Did i mention about grafical blocks for interface like in lego NXT2.0 😏

Is mathlab that crap or is programming that easy?

Android flow I’ve found(fixed in android 8, working on 7.1.1):
To make app uninstallable by the normal user make the app device administrator, add “android.permission.SYSTEM_ALERT_WINDOW” to the manifest and make sure it’s not granted by the user.
Now when you try to uninstall the app, it tells you to disable it from device administrators but the device administrator disable dialog is System Window handled by the app itself and if the app has this permission but not granted, settings will crash with SecurityException leaving the app untouched.

Weirdest thing I should be the most stressed I've ever been 🤔, my work load is insane right now

I am getting paid well for it 😏

But honestly I'm more at peace then I ever have been 😉

I love my job - remember these times

Currently got a designer blatantly trying to discredit me 😬

Always trying to prove I don’t understand what I’m on about luckily 😏 I do

How do you handle someone like this?

She’s always bitchy on the phone

The only sexy cooperate jargon / acronym word(s) is/are:
WFH = Work From Home ❤️🤓😏

I am but they are not 😏😏

programmers after Rust:
- cat ears: on
- pink thigh-highs: on
- butt plug: in
“I… I use Wust 😏🤤 bwazing fast UwU”

programmers before Rust:

Am I the only one who thinks about how much impact we as programmers and developers have today and tomorrow in the world, the society, and the whole digital age? 🤔

...😏

😏 keep them in suspense

for all the apps who make one sign up before they prove their usefulness

🌵🌵🌵🖕🖕🖕 + mailinator 😏😈

Well I feel like an idiot thanks to my IT teacher. This guy, this fucking guy thinks that we’re seeing computer for the first time. He’s literally saying “You see this black bar on the bottom? That’s taskbar.”. It’s like he’s teaching 7 years old childs 😤
But the worst part is my class mated don’t know such basics! They don’t know how binary code works, what is motherboard, how to login to school domain on Windows.

But on the flip side, they look at me like at the God 😏

Who needs windows update?

Newbie-
Today: Loves Java
Tomorrow: loves Python
Next: loves PHP
Everyday: VERY FUCKING CONFUSED!

But, as long as the codes run, we good😏

Just slept in front of coding.
*Boss tap my back*
Me: Hi sir, Im just thinking of the solutions. 😏

I can't decide on a linux distro because all I've tried are great. Seriously.

I'd call myself a novice-to-intermediate linux user (heavy on the novice part) and since I work as a web developer it's been a great learning experience to use the same OS on my workstation as the webservers my projects run on. (Ie I started out with Ubuntu and a LAMP setup).

The thing is I distrohop ad infinitum... Feels like I've tried out every desktop environment known to mankind (I just can't stop myself when I see a new one or a new take on an old one) and I've dipped my toes in Arch territory to. Loved Antergos when that still was a thing. Found EndeavourOS this weekend, kernel panic ensued. I'm a noob with sudo and that's never a good thing. 😆 (Try out in a virtual machine first you say? Bah. Where's the fun in that?!)

So now I'm on Linux Mint w Cinnamon because why not. (Because it's sluggish and boring, that's why...) I had to just get something up and running quickly so I could get back to work. 😬

But one day in and I'm realising I actually miss GNOME. And Ubuntu feels like home. I would feel much cooler using Arch but honestly I don't think I can be trusted with it. I love tinkering with settings, look and feel and whatnot but I can honestly do that just as well in an Ubuntu/GNOME environment.

Maybe Pop!_OS... could be something for me. 😏

!rant

Learning many new things and churning out good code is so fucking satisfying!
And the best part is: it actually works! 😏🚀

mfw
> 1 year into project in React.js with a 10+ members in team
> PM panics over last Apache statement
> PM: "fuck, rewrite it in Angular 4 : /"

When your code works correctly the first time 😏 👌

Here at the client site everyone uses Windows 7, since this is not an IT firm. They make jewellery. So I don't blame them.
The problem is their in house dev team are also forced to use Windows.

Today someone from their dev team was with me for a new project. Their senior guy sent us a mail mentioning that the project code is on AWS EC2 instance and we will have to SSH to see it.
I checked the code on my MacBook with SSH and copied it to local using SCP. The dev guy was seeing it in amazement. I asked, what's it?

He just asked, "You don't have to use PUTTY" 😮

I smirked 😏

Tried working with ear plugs instead of music last week. I think I might be ditching music 😏

After my winter examination session I am going to start the biggest Android project in my life. If I promote it properly, you will hear about me in the future 😏

@localhost, my desk. Also where I eat dinner, sometimes with my wife too. As you can see, my old Pro is displaying a perfect visual representation of what is happening to my soul. 😏

uptime, the haiku

Autoscaling rules. 😏
Happy, multi-tenant zones. 😎
Fuck, prod-san-2’s down. 🙄

The reason i rant is so i can continue code to pay rent 😏

I knew my glass acted weird 😏

I had very small experience on programming and applied for a dev Job kind of accidently.
But having good mathematical Background I convinced the Interviewer to give me the chance of learning during an internship. So I started a console Tool for special testing purpose with good success.
After the internship they asked me if I'm willing to lern Javascript and HTML. Though I had a lot of fun there, the answer was easy 😏
Now I'm a senior there having a team of 4-5 devs
And I still enjoy coding a lot 😎
So basically I learned coding during work

Friend from a company I did an integration delivery with sent me this lovely slack discouse. I had no idea their HR lady let her freak flag fly at work 😏

Wonder how many years she's been casually tossing that one around.

Solve low motivation =
Rub a duck 😏

Who needs support anyways 😏

its time to back to university. these days were so relaxed. walk around on a different city,talked with my friends.and take many beautiful photos.😏a little tired , but happy.

Full stack isn’t about knowing just a backend and little bit of JavaScript. Turns out a bunch of them who applied this week seem it have derived a new meaning for it!

Throwing around terms like “I am exploring MEAN” doesn’t make you sound cool unless you have some working examples that you have built with it.

So i informed my intent to leave the job in few months in pursuit of learning something new in tech. Boss is trying to convince me to not leave and said i should consider learning it after work hours. In fact, in his opinion, the best way to learn is just going ahead and learning it while doing it in the project ( which usually has impossible deadline and fugly code by colleagues who never thinks of good coding practices when typing their shit ).

Well guess what boss, I don't want to just live a life staring at monitor all day. I don't want to kill my eyes either.

Following his advise and not quitting would mean living a slave life.

I have other plans actually. Like being self employed and traveling the world which would be impossible if i follow the routine life.

Fun fact: he claimed he made an AI car back in 90s!

He also thinks I can't sense BS!😏

Programmer BF before we were dating: I love my job. My job is the best thing ever. I will never love anything as much as I love coding.

Me: K

*A few months later*

Me: Ugh, your alarm is going off. Wake up.

PBF: I don't wanna go to work 😭

Me: Oh really? 😏

I polish dirty code 😏

Just implemented A* and Dijkstra to get into pathfinding with graphs. Really hyped about this! TIL that Dijkstra is perfect to find the quickest subway route in my city 😏