I thought it would be good prank change semicolons to Greek question mark in my boss' code where his delivery date is today. I thought he will spend like at least few minutes figuring it out.

He ran make, immediately figured it out and even corrected with sed only. Then yawned and looked at me with a smirk. Now I am getting paranoid what he will do as revenge

preface: I'm fucking exhausted and angry.

Why does everyone assume I know how to do frontend?
Why am I always the design girl?
Why?

You hire me to do backend. STOP GIVING ME FRONTEND DESIGN CRAP. I HATE IT.

AND STOP GODDAMN YELLING AT ME FOR NOT MAKING SOMETHING RESPONSIVE.

I DON'T KNOW HOW.

yes i can learn, but I CAN'T FUCKING PICK UP A SKILL LIKE THAT IN A DAY. Also, I fucking hate it.

STICK IT UP YOUR (min-width: 1400px) ASS.

But seriously, I've spent 13 hours today figuring out completely new things (webpack, susy, express.js, cloudinary, responsive best practices, more webpack) because the boss is in panic-mode (his preferred state) and wants this project released last monday.

guess what? it isn't done.
because i still don't know how to do everything. and ofc there's nobody to ask because there never fucking is.

Seriously, boss-man. hire a fucking designer, and stop being an illiterate sales goon while you're at it. ffs.

Things I've learned throughout my 5 - 6 years as a programmer.
- StackOverflow is full of assholes.
- CMS's are for weaklings.
- The best feeling about waking up in the morning is figuring out how to solve that error in your code.
- You no longer think about normal people things. Your mind is full of code.
- You're practically a computer.
- ALWAYS backup and save your stuff or you WILL regret it. Enable autosave if possible.
- RIP your social life (if your friends don't know squat about programming)
- Darkness is better.
- Being a programmer is amazing.

1. Have some issue with my code which spits out cryptic compiler error.

2. Ask on stack overflow, Reddit, etc for a solution.

3. Get scolded at for "not reading the documentation" and "asking questions which could be answered by just Googling". Still no clue what I'm doing wrong, or what the solution would be.

4. Find someone else's vaguely related problem.

5. Post my problematic code as the answer, with arrogant comment about OP being a retard for not figuring that out for themselves.

6. A dozen angry toxic nerds flock in to tell me how retarded and wrong I am, correcting me... solving my original problem.

7. Evil plan succeeded, my code compiles, and as a bonus I made the internet a worse place in the process.

I think if you tell a bunch of autistic neckbeards that "all coronaviruses are fundamentally incurable", you'd have a vaccine within a week.

People complaining "oh I always have trouble figuring out if the clock goes forwards or backwards in October"

Bitch please, I'm dealing with 12 databases, with SQL dates as local timezone timestamps, and an influxDB in UTC. I'm dealing with a backend server configured in CEST and a middleware layer configured in Pacific time, and a hundred functions which try to keep everything straight because no one dares to migrate it all to UTC at this point.

In the whole argument about DST you hear about sleep psychology, electricity bills and farmers.

But what about me, the poor database administrator? What about all these ugly legacy systems, what about all the UX designers trying to fix time input pickers?

I spend 2 months a year in agony having nightmares of rips and folds in the flow of time. DAYLIGHT SAVING DOESN'T FUCKING MAKE SENSE HOW CAN TIME EXIST TWICE?

During teacher office hours a few years back: if you have questions on your homework, maybe it's too hard and you should switch majors to something easier, many girls do, so there's no shame in it.

I had asked for verification that my standard deviation logic was correct before spending the time coding it and then figuring out what was wrong.

Ps- he's no longer employed by the school for other sexist reasons.

When you spend hours figuring out where the bug is, with no luck, and then you wake up in the middle of the night knowing exactly what and how to fix...

Worst part of being a dev. Figuring out names

Every step of this project has added another six hurdles. I thought it would be easy, and estimated it at two days to give myself a day off. But instead it's ridiculous. I'm also feeling burned out, depressed (work stress, etc.), and exhausted since I'm taking care of a 3 week old. It has not been fun. :<

I've been trying to get the Google Sheets API working (in Ruby). It's for a shared sales/tracking spreadsheet between two companies.

The documentation for it is almost entirely for Python and Java. The Ruby "quickstart" sample code works, but it's only for 3-legged auth (meaning user auth), but I need it for 2-legged auth (server auth with non-expiring credentials). Took awhile to figure out that variant even existed.

After a bit of digging, I discovered I needed to create a service account. This isn't the most straightforward thing, and setting it up honestly reminds me of setting up AWS, just with less risk of suddenly and surprisingly becoming a broke hobo by selecting confusing option #27 instead of #88.

I set up a new google project, tied it to my company's account (I think?), and then set up a service account for it, with probably the right permissions.

After downloading its creds, figuring out how to actually use them took another few hours. Did I mention there's no Ruby documentation for this? There's plenty of Python and Java example code, but since they use very different implementations, it's almost pointless to read them. At best they give me a vague idea of what my next step might be.

I ended up reading through the code of google's auth gem instead because I couldn't find anything useful online. Maybe it's actually there and the past several days have been one of those weeks where nothing ever works? idk :/

But anyway. I read through their code, and while it's actually not awful, it has some odd organization and a few very peculiar param names. Figuring out what data to pass, and how said data gets used requires some file-hopping. e.g. `json_data_io` wants a file handle, not the data itself. This is going to cause me headaches later since the data will be in the database, not the filesystem. I guess I can write a monkeypatch? or fork their gem? :/

But I digress. I finally manged to set everything up, fix the bugs with my code, and I'm ready to see what `service.create_spreadsheet()` returns. (now that it has positively valid and correctly-implemented authentication! Finally! Woo!)

I open the console... set up the auth... and give it a try.

... six seconds pass ...

... another two seconds pass ...

... annnd I get a lovely "unauthorized" response.

asjdlkagjdsk.

> Pic related.

Figuring out the perfect algorithm for your code

Friend of mine killed his MacBook with some Softdrink.

Just poured it all over his poor a1502.

He let it dry for a few days, it starts to work again.
Except the battery.

Goes on Amazon and buys a new battery.

New battery doesn't work either and so he tells me about it and I as stupid as I am couldn't resist the temptation to finally work on a MacBook like my "hero" Lois Rossmann does.

So turns out the board is good.
Cleaned it up and basically nothing happened to it.

So what's the deal with "los batlerias"?

The first got hit by liquid, the second had a broken connection to a cell.
That could have happened through my friend, installing it without testing it first, or at the seller, so it being a DOA battery.

Now away from the stupidity of my friend and the situation to the actual source for this rant.

Once something happens to a modern Managed battery, the Battery Management System (BMS) disconnects the voltage from the system and goes into an error state, staying there and not powering anything ever again.
For noobs, it's dead. Buy a new one.

But It can be reset, depending you know how to, and which passwords were set at the factory.
Yes, the common Texas instruments BQ20Zxx chips have default passwords, and apple seems to leav them at default.

The Usb to SMBus adaptors arrived a few days ago and I went to prod the BMS.

There is a very nice available for Windows called BE2works, that I used the demo of to go in and figure out stuff. The full version supports password cracking, the demo not.

After some time figuring out how Smart Battery Systems (SBS) "API" works, I got to actually enter the passwords into the battery to try get into manufacturer and full access mode.

Just to realise, they don't unlock the BMS.

So, to conclude, my friend bought a "new" battery that was most likely cut out of a used / dead macbook, which reports 3000mah as fully charged instead of the 6xxx mah that it should have, with 0 cycles and 0hours used.
And non default access.

This screams after those motherfuckers scaming the shit out of people on Amazon, with refurb, reset, and locked fucken batteries.

I could kill those people right now.

Last but not least,
My friend theoretically can't send it back because I opened the battery to fix the broken connection.
Though maybe, it'll get send back anyway, with some suprise in the package.

I still miss my college days. Our crappy IT Dept restricted internet usage on campus. Each student used to get 10 GB of internet data and they used Cyberoam for login (without HTTPS). 10 GB was so less (at least for me).

Now, thanks to CS50, I learned that HTTP was not secure and somehow you can access login credentials. I spent a night figuring things out and then bam!! Wireshark!!!!

I went to the Central Library and connected using Wireshark. Within a matter of minutes, I got more than 30 user ids and passwords. One of them belonged to a Professor. And guess what, it had unlimited data usage with multiple logins. I felt like I was a millionaire. On my farewell, I calculated how much data I used. It was in TBs.

Lesson: Always secure your URLs.

So...
I'm penetrationtesting a network and the servers on said network
The network administrator and IT security officer knows this, because they hired me..

TL;DR a scan caused the network to crash.

Today I received a very angry email going "Stop scanning NOW!" from one of the IT departments.

Apparently I crashed their login server and thus their entire network...
It happened d the first time I scanned the network from the outside and they had spend an entire day figuring out how and repairing the service they thought was the problem, but then it crashed again, when I scanned from within the network.

Now they want to send me a list of IP's that I'm not allowed to scan and want to know exactly what and when I'm scanning...

How crap can they be at their job, if they weren't able to spot a scan... The only reason they found out it was me was because the NA had whitelistet my IP, so that I could scan in peace...

Spent my entire evening figuring something out (I'm new to this) and finally found a possible solution.

Got ready for writing test code, very excited...... aaaaaaand noticed its past 11pm so I've got to go to bed because work tomorrow

😥😭

Oke so this just happened...

Spent 30 minutes figuring out why the f**k a div was vertically centered within another one.

Apparently margin:auto within a display: flex not only centers horizontally but also vertically.

I remember the days when i spent hours vertically centering sh*t. What universe are we in?

Someone wrote a piece of code half a year ago. It's fuckin complex and recursive. And uncommented. Today it's my job to figure out WHY and HOW it works.
If it wasn't clear before, that someone who wrote it was me. I'm not sure if I was on some substances back then, but that shit is fast and I have no clue how I was able to create it. Perhaps it was the coffee overdose...

However, wish me luck figuring this thing out.

after spending a day figuring out why my code does not work, i finally realized someone broke master

then i found myself in the following conversation

jim : "yeah, we found out about it yesterday, i am working on a fix right now"

me : "so why did you not send and email to everyone that master is broken, don't pull changes"?

jim : "hey... someone told me to fix it, so that's what i am doing. that doesn't include sending an email. if you want to, you can send it.. "

Interviewer: Here is the interview challenge. Tell me what the expected output is. You have 5 minutes.

** 100 line class with 4 async methods that contain if/thens nested 4 layers deep that call each other and log things to the console

Dev: Ok wow this is a bit of a maze to work through but I’ll try my best.

** 1 minute later of reading through the code

Interviewer: One minute has elapsed. There is now 4 minutes remaining.

Dev: Actually could you please not interject with time updates like that while I’m reading code? It makes the challenge harder than necessary. Just letting me know when the time is up would be fine.

Interviewer: Ok.

** ~2 minutes later trying to comb through this spaghetti mess

Interviewer: What do you think are you getting close to figuring it out?

Dev: …

Dear customer,
as our services are completely free and we do not get paid for working, we beg you to understand, that there are some things you have to tolerate.

1. We are DEFINITELY not going to work 24/7 for you and answer immediately anytime. Only because it's 3pm in your country doesn't mean it's 3pm in our country!

2. We will NOT waste any time figuring out your gibberish and translate your language to our language or whatever, you have to be able to understand English anyways because our website and rules and everything is English!

3. Speaking of rules, READ THEM, I'm sick of explaining to you why you are banned, what do you think FAQs are made for?!

4. STOP SPAMMING AND TAGGING ME FFS. First we have a support chat so you can leave a message there and somebody will read it eventually AND SECONDLY I'M NOT THE ONLY SUPPORTER SO STOP BUGGING ME.

5. READ THE FUCKING MESSAGES I WRITE!

geez.. I just lost it for a second... okay.. gotta go now, I got 20 new messages since I started writing this rant.

My life 😂 why can’t I just stick with one? So many lost hours figuring out the differences between distros, patching kernels, installing drivers, and for what?

I usually have a pen and notebook at my table while coding, to scribble while I'm figuring out stuff. Anyone else does this?

FUCK YES! I FUCKING DID IT. I'M FUCKING RUNNING I3 ON LINUX ON MOTHER FLIPPING WINDOWS!!!

I'm sorry but I don't have anyone else to share this with. I feel so... empowered. If windows continues to support the wsl, who knows how far they will get. This makes windows so attractive. I still keep using debian on my desktop machine but my laptop isn't so underpowered in terms of software now that I'm figuring this stuff out.

What an absolute fucking disaster of a day. Strap in, folks; it's time for a bumpy ride!

I got a whole hour of work done today. The first hour of my morning because I went to work a bit early. Then people started complaining about Jenkins jobs failing on that one Jenkins server our team has been wanting to decom for two years but management won't let us force people to move to new servers. It's a single server with over four thousand projects, some of which run massive data processing jobs that last DAYS. The server was originally set up by people who have since quit, of course, and left it behind for my team to adopt with zero documentation.

Anyway, the 500GB disk is 100% full. The memory (all 64GB of it) is fully consumed by stuck jobs. We can't track down large old files to delete because du chokes on the workspace folder with thousands of subfolders with no Ram to spare. We decide to basically take a hacksaw to it, deleting the workspace for every job not currently in progress. This of course fucked up some really poorly-designed pipelines that relied on workspaces persisting between jobs, so we had to deal with complaints about that as well.

So we get the Jenkins server up and running again just in time for AWS to have a major incident affecting EC2 instance provisioning in our primary region. People keep bugging me to fix it, I keep telling them that it's Amazon's problem to solve, they wait a few minutes and ask me to fix it again. Emails flying back and forth until that was done.

Lunch time already. But the fun isn't over yet!

I get back to my desk to find out that new hires or people who got new Mac laptops recently can't even install our toolchain, because management has started handing out M1 Macs without telling us and all our tools are compiled solely for x86_64. That took some troubleshooting to even figure out what the problem was because the only error people got from homebrew was that the formula was empty when it clearly wasn't.

After figuring out that problem (but not fully solving it yet), one team starts complaining to us about a Github problem because we manage the github org. Except it's not a github problem and I already knew this because they are a Problem Team that uses some technical authoring software with Git integration but they only have even the barest understanding of what Git actually does. Turns out it's a Git problem. An update for Git was pushed out recently that patches a big bad vulnerability and the way it was patched causes problems because they're using Git wrong (multiple users accessing the same local repo on a samba share). It's a huge vulnerability so my entire conversation with them went sort of like:

"Please don't."
"We have to."
"Fine, here's a workaround, this will allow arbitrary code execution by anyone with physical or virtual access to this computer that you have sitting in an unlocked office somewhere."
"How do I run a Git command I don't use Git."

So that dealt with, I start taking a look at our toolchain, trying to figure out if I can easily just cross-compile it to arm64 for the M1 macbooks or if it will be a more involved fix. And I find all kinds of horrendous shit left behind by the people who wrote the tools that, naturally, they left for us to adopt when they quit over a year ago. I'm talking entire functions in a tool used by hundreds of people that were put in as a joke, poorly documented functions I am still trying to puzzle out, and exactly zero comments in the code and abbreviated function names like "gars", "snh", and "jgajawwawstai".

While I'm looking into that, the person from our team who is responsible for incident communication finally gets the AWS EC2 provisioning issue reported to IT Operations, who sent out an alert to affected users that should have gone out hours earlier.

Meanwhile, according to the health dashboard in AWS, the issue had already been resolved three hours before the communication went out and the ticket remains open at this moment, as far as I know.

Me passing time on the weekend

Random call from unknown number

Turns out it's the manager

M: hey , how is your weekend going ...

Me: nothing much ... Whatsup ?

M : yeah well , we wanted to push some minor adhoc fixes as some clients wanted it urgently

The Devops folks need developer support . Can you pitch in and monitor

Me : I'm not aware of what changes are going , i don't think i can provide support

M : don't worry it's minor changes , it's already tested in pre prod , you just need to be on call for 30 mins

Me : ugh okay .. guess 1 hr won't hurt

M: thanks 👍🏽

Me: *logs in

*Notices the last merged PR
+ 400 lines , implemented by junior dev and merged by manager

*Wait , how is this a *minor* release...

*Release got triggered already and the CI CD pipeline is in progress

*5 mins later

*Pipeline fails , devops sends email - test coverage below 50%

Manager immediately pitches in ...

M: hey , i see test coverage is down , can you increase it ?

Me: and how do u suppose I do that ?

M : well it's simple just write UTC for the missing lines ... Will it take time ?

Me : * ah shit here we go again

Yeah it will take time , there are around 400 lines , I am not aware of this component all together

Can you ask junior dev to pitch in and write the UTC for this

*Actually junior dev is out on a vacation with his girlfriend

M : well he's out for the weekend , but
as a senior dev , i expect you to have holistic understanding of the codebase and not give excuses ,
this is a priority fix which client are demanding we need this released ASAP

Me : * wait wat ?

---

I ended up being online for next 3 hours figuring out the code change and bumping up the UTC 🤦🏾

I often times write code and think to myself "I don't have to comment this, it's obvious what is going on", only to find myself back at the same code, figuring out wtf it does...

Worst part about being a dev is figuring out good variable names and function names.

So I've decided if I am invited to a school career day the what I'll do is this.

1. Start by handing out one of those logic puzzles that are like Sally lives 2 houses down from Bill, Bill is 3 houses away from Maggie where does Jerry live type of thing. Then I'll tell the kids they have 10 minutes to figure it out.

2. After about three minutes I'll tell them that they also need to figure out where Jerry lives and not give them enough information to figure that out.

3. 5 minutes in I'll start asking them why it is taking so long, and it shouldn't be that hard. I'll also ask about where Phil lives who was never mentioned before.

4. At 7 minutes I'll look for anyone who might be figuring it out and tell them there is a much more important high priority problem I need them to solve and give them a new puzzle and tell them I expect them both to be done on time.

5. At nine minutes I'll start yelling at them that they must not be that good and why they haven't finished yet if any of them complain I'll tell them they are just dumb.

6. At ten minutes I'll ask them to turn it in and then immediately throw it in the trash and tell them that wasn't what they were supposed to be doing, and tell them they did it wrong.

I figure that is a pretty good representation of what working in software engineering is like.

Spent an hour figuring out an ERR_NAME_NOT_RESOLVED on a fetch Post call.

Turns out I was calling locahost instead of localhost.........

Only figured it out because I zoomed in on the console output by accident.

fml

Sometimes I feel like my job is just babysitting my coworkers. I need to find a way to teach them how to think for themselves.

I'm not a senior dev but I am the one my coworkers turn to for help. I like helping (even if it's annoying some times), so I'm thinking about embracing the mentor role in my team. My plan for now is to stop giving the answers right away (which I usually do to get back to my work) and instead try to guide my coworkers into figuring out the issue themselves. This will take more of my time of course and will require I practice my patience in a possibly stressful environment (depending on how close deadlines are), but I'm hoping that it'll produce better coworkers (one can dream, at least).

Do any of you know of any good reading resources about mentoring or becoming a mentor, specifically in tech/development?

Got this rude ass email from an idiot client who thinks I'm solely responsible for figuring out how to link his 3rd party email/newsletter sign up form to his new website without any access to the account. He "doesn't have the time to research". Newsflash asshat, I'm not responsible for your 3rd party shit. Go contact their support. 🙄😑

30 min figuring out what happen to my code. And realize that = is used in if statement instead of ==.

Thanks brain

I am much too tired to go into details, probably because I left the office at 11:15pm, but I finally finished a feature. It doesn't even sound like a particularly large or complicated feature. It sounds like a simple, 1-2 day feature until you look at it closely.

It took me an entire fucking week. and all the while I was coaching a junior dev who had just picked up Rails and was building something very similar.

It's the model, controller, and UI for creating a parent object along with 0-n child objects, with default children suggestions, a fancy ui including the ability to dynamically add/remove children via buttons. and have the entire happy family save nicely and atomically on the backend. Plus a detailed-but-simple listing for non-technicals including some absolutely nontrivial css acrobatics.

After getting about 90% of everything built and working and beautiful, I learned that Rails does quite a bit of this for you, through `accepts_nested_params_for :collection`. But that requires very specific form input namespacing, and building that out correctly is flipping difficult. It's not like I could find good examples anywhere, either. I looked for hours. I finally found a rails tutorial vide linked from a comment on a SO answer from five years ago, and mashed its oversimplified and dated examples with the newer documentation, and worked around the issues that of course arose from that disasterous paring.

like.
I needed to store a template of the child object markup somewhere, yeah? The video had me trying to store all of the markup in a `data-fields=" "` attrib. wth? I tried storing it as a string and injecting it into javascript, but that didn't work either. parsing errors! yay! good job, you two.

So I ended up storing the markup (rendered from a rails partial) in an html comment of all things, and pulling the markup out of the comment and gsubbing its IDs on document load. This has the annoying effect of preventing me from using html comments in that partial (not that i really use them anyway, but.)

Just.
Every step of the way on building this was another mountain climb.
* singular vs plural naming and routing, and named routes. and dealing with issues arising from existing incorrect pluralization.
* reverse polymorphic relation (child -> x parent)
* The testing suite is incompatible with the new rails6. There is no fix. None. I checked. Nope. Not happening.
* Rails6 randomly and constantly crashes and/or caches random things (including arbitrary code changes) in development mode (and only development mode) when working with multiple databases.
* nested form builders
* styling a fucking checkbox
* Making that checkbox (rather, its label and container div) into a sexy animated slider
* passing data and locals to and between partials
* misleading documentation
* building the partials to be self-contained and reusable
* coercing form builders into namespacing nested html inputs the way Rails expects
* input namespacing redux, now with nested form builders too!
* Figuring out how to generate markup for an empty child when I'm no longer rendering the children myself
* Figuring out where the fuck to put the blank child template markup so it's accessible, has the right namespacing, and is not submitted with everything else
* Figuring out how the fuck to read an html comment with JS
* nested strong params
* nested strong params
* nested fucking strong params
* caching parsed children's data on parent when the whole thing is bloody atomic.
* Converting datetimes from/to milliseconds on save/load
* CSS and bootstrap collisions
* CSS and bootstrap stupidity
* Reinventing the entire multi-child / nested params / atomic creating/updating/deleting feature on my own before discovering Rails can do that for you.

Just.
I am so glad it's working.
I don't even feel relieved. I just feel exhausted.

But it's done.
finally.

and it's done well. It's all self-contained and reusable, it's easy to read, has separate styling and reusable partials, etc. It's a two line copy/paste drop-in for any other model that needs it. Two lines and it just works, and even tells you if you screwed up.

I'm incredibly proud of everything that went into this.
But mostly I'm just incredibly tired.

Time for some well-deserved sleep.

For goodness fucking sake Microsoft. Stop doing everything possible to get me to use Edge Browser.
Since building my new computer I've had edge recommended in the notification center, lock screen, start screen, emails, and now on my fucking taskbar.

Seriously what the hell is wrong with them, I DONT WANT TO USE THEIR SHITTY BROWSER. I wont use their shitty browser so stop recommending it to me. I'm already invested In Google services so stop trying to push your own on me.

Honest to God what do the higher ups at Microsoft do with their time? Sit around a table figuring out how to get people to use their default apps?

analysing a database problem and writing a 4-line fix: 5 minutes.

preparing a foolproof manual for the manager on how to apply the fix: 15 minutes

writing a manager-level explanation what the fix does: 30 minutes.

explaining it to the manager: 30 minutes.

writing a _detailled_ explanation why we need the fix: 60 minutes.

explaining it to the manager again: 30 minutes.

figuring out why our progress is slow:

_priceless_

I think the coolest all-nighter I can remember is when me and one of my best friends were still in school. We were up all night figuring out what to make. At the time we played a little browser click game, so we came up with the idea of creating a bot for it.

We're both PHP developers, but we figured that wouldn't be an appropriate language to write a bot in. So we went for C#. Both of us never worked with it.

At the end of the night we built a fully functioning bot, that could continue playing the game when we were at school. It could do all our manual tasks and could even decode Captchas with the Google OCR package.

That night was productive.

"I'm getting an error. It's just not working right."

Stupidest. Bug. Report. Ever.

Please stop wasting our time with tickets like this people, it only requires is to then spend more time just figuring out what the issue is.

🙄🔫

Today's 🤡 task: figuring out how "localhost:3000" snuck into one of the critical production links...

FUUUUUUUUU

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Today I discovered what slowed my productivity the most: variable naming.

In a project I was naming many variables 'dirname' in different parts of the my code, but it represented 3 things: only the name of the directory, relative path + directory, and absolute path + directory.

I wasted to much time just figuring out which was which everytime until I finally decided to organize variables names better and see the wonders of the world. Result:
- dirname: only the name
- reldirname: relative path + dir
- absdirname: absolute path + dir

Such simple solution, yet took me years to actually see the benefits, my god

(First devRant post btw :3)

"Well this is Java, that's intelliJ"
-Guy in my CS class figuring out why my code works and his doesn't

How do I even start?
The guy that's supposed to be our extra resource, our go-to person, asked me why node_modules and typescript output files are not committed.
Node.friggin.modules!
And by typescript output files, I mean the compiled .js files. Shoot me now...
All he does all day is waste time! Useless calls scheduled way too early, 'cause IST & why the heck not?

And don't even get me started on his "knowledgeable" colleague who spent 2 friggin' days on figuring out how to find an element in an array.
I mean ok, I get that the language is new and the syntax is different, but boy, how I wish that was the problem! But nooo, her issue was figuring out the damn logic behind it!
Not to mention that I gotta do the code review and she keeps ignoring the changes that I ask of her unless I raise that in our daily meeting and reports stuff as done even before submitting a damn pull request. Also, I gotta shut up and take it, 'cause they are the client's internal resources, which has me ranting about it at 2 a.m. T_T

Ugh...

Anyone else work in a codebase that is so deeply convoluted, that the only way to make new features work is to write new code in a similarly convoluted way?

Everyone wants to refactor our system, but we're a small shop with an insane amount of technical debt, so it likely won't happen for a long time. Any suggestions in the meantime? I feel like I'm spending more time figuring out how to make something work in our system then learning actual good practices.

My first post here, be merciful please.

So, I participate in game jams now and then. About two years ago, I was participating in one, and we where near the deadline. Our game was pretty much done, so we where posted a "alpha" version waiting for feedback.

Just half an hour before the deadline, we got a comment on our alpha alerting us of a rather important typo: The instruction screen said "Press X to shoot" while X did nothing and Z was the correct key. "Good thing we caught that in time, thankfully a easy fix" I thought.

This project was written in python, and built using py2exe. If you know py2exe, the least error-prone method outputs a folder containing the .exe, plus ginormous amounts of dll's, pyc files, and various other crap. We would put the entire folder together with graphics and other resources into a .zip and tell the judges to look for the .exe.

Anyway, on this occasion I committed to source control ran the build, it seemed to work on my quick test. I uploaded the zip, right before the deadline and sat back waiting for the results.

I had forgotten one final step.

I had not copied my updated files to the zip, which still contained the old version.

Anyway, I ended up losing a lot of points in "user friendliness" since the judges had trouble figuring out how to shoot. After I figured out why and how it happened, I had a embarrassing story to tell my teammates.

This is how beautiful corporate is -

I talked to my cousin recently who works in an MNC. He told me about a team member who was assigned a Google Login integration task on the website. They already had a username/password combo working.

That team member took 2 months for it. Every week on the team wide meeting he took an off day and kept saying he was 'stuck' on the task and he's figuring it out.

2 months later, he completed the task and got compliments from the manager that he 'worked day and night' and overcame his struggles. Then he got a week off for his 'efforts'.

Just kill me at this point.

My team are so needy and incapable of figuring anything out independently that I've basically not got any of my sprint tasks done so far. So today I told them that I was working from home for a day to actually get done work done, but I'm on Slack if they really need me.

The only observable difference now is that instead of just bugging me, they start every conversation with, "sorry, I know you're busy, but..."

Anybody else feel like you've missed the crypto-currency bus?

It's one of my frequent regrets this past year, and I'm still figuring out how to get started earning some BTC.

We're digital plumbers.

90% of this job is figuring out what thing to connect to what thing and then figuring out how to connect them.

Writing the code that goes in-between both ends of the pipe is easy if not trivial 90% of the time.

Meaningful change in this industry is centered around endpoints: contracts, deployments, etc. Nobody needs yet another way to organize and import their leftpad().

Holy FREAKING shit!! This was worst stupidest mistake I have ever made!

About 9 hours ago, i decided to implement brotli compression in my server.

It looked a bit challenging for me, because the all the guides involved compiling and building the nginx with brotli module and I was not that confident doing that on live site.

By the end of the guide, the site was not reachable anymore. I panicked.

Even the error logs and access logs were not picking up anything.

About a dozens guides and a new server and figuring out few major undocumented errors later, it turns out the main nginx.conf file had a line that was looking for *.conf files in the sites-enabled directory.

But my conf file was named after the domain name and ending with .com and hence were not picked up by the new nginx.conf

I'm not sure if I wasted my 9 hours because of that single line or not. But man, this was a really rough day!

If you're angry at someone not figuring out your code because it was “obvious”, remember:

even before 9/11 happened, emergency lines found out they should say “nine-one-one” instead of “nine-eleven”. Why? Because panicking people were looking for “eleven” button on the keypad. They learned it the hard way.

No one is rational 100% of the time.

Working on my Google Foo Bar level 4 challenge.

9 days past figuring out how to solve this problem..

And finally reached on a working solution. When started compiling my solution.

And then i Find out, the fucking Google tool is facing some bug and not allowing compilation. Tried hard to do everything but still getting errors...
And after searching on Google just found I'm fucked up.. It's on Google's end and they are not fixing it since so many days..

Just 5 days left to complete.. And i have no idea what should i do...

4 month work just fucked up

Fucking lazy customer support that files bugs with "<some functionality> is not working" with no steps to reproduce or any other description of the issue, deserve to die in the same hell as it is figuring out the rest of the details.

Figuring out where to put my devRant stickers is like picking variable names.

Except you can't refactor stickers...

You motherfucking incompetent useless collection of hairy ballsacks even a trained monkey could do a better job than you do. And I swear once we literally cross the 99% availability rate I will find your headquarters and smash everyone's face into each of your fucking servers then set that whole place on fire.

You forget to flush the DNS cache after moving my server (of course on Friday when else), here is 2 days of error page for my site, whoose instructions a normal user simply couldn't follow. Not to mention it pointed to the wrong article.

Random 503 error, and you aren't​ answering my phone calls, though usually I am the first one who informs you of a fucking problem with your fucking server and I have to wait 5-10 minutes in line while you are figuring out the problem.

And now random forbidden error for my whole page. Out of nothing. I've changed nothing. You said one hour earlier that it's your mistake and it will took around 30 min. Still nothing.

I'm fed up with all your bullshit. Go fuck yourselves.

I'm out...

Hardest part of bring a newbie programmer? Figuring out which keywords to use when you search Google, to get the right answer

The role of a Product Manager is just a decade or two old. Most organisations, including FAANG, are still figuring out what are the primary responsibilities of a PM.

A vast majority I know, including my dumbass, is struggling to keep things floating while in the role. Learning on the job is one of the only and most effective way to do so.

No wonder, imposter syndrome is so common in this group.

One of the main tasks is to make decisions. Important and impactful ones. The role came into existence to take the decision making load off our engineering friends while building any product.

This shit comes with huge responsibility.

BUT, not everyone understand this. In India, being a developer was a cool thing until 2018 and so everyone rushed into the role. Now somehow everyone started thinking being a Product Manager is cool because all you have to do is sit and shoot orders and things will happen magically.

I get reached out by so many folks every month asking for guidance and when I ask them what a PM does or why they want to be a PM, the narrative is more or less same.

Very few actually understand how taxing the role is or the challenges that we face while performing the job.

WHY THE FUCK ARE PEOPLE SO IGNORANT AND DUMB?

And in another news, my first week at new job was super amazing. Loved every bit of it. People are smart, processes are neat, things are structured, and lots and lots to learn for me.

How are you guys doing? Been a while that we spoke.

Official declaration: I am the dumbest person I know.

Some of the smartest and brightest people I know are arrogant as fuck.

And I believe they have all the right to do so, for they have earned it.

Be kind and leechers will drain the living soul out of you.

If you aspire to achieve greatness for self, then setting boundaries is important.

This does not mean, you have to harsh to everyone, rather it's about figuring out whom to give your time and attention.

Spent 30 minutes figuring out WHY THE FUCK is toggle not working.

Turned out the value was undefined because of a fucking typo!

Finally fucking managed to setup quite fast map tile hosting including the tile generation after ages of research and trial and error.

I love this open (source) maps (openstreetmaps) project but man, figuring out what to do from a gazillion sources can be rather hard.

Now I'm just having some styling issues and the filesize is fucking insane (only the Netherlands with all data, 20gb+ if I remember correctly) so I'm just generating road maps for now. If someone knows some more about the styling as for the maps, please let me know!

Yeah, this is fucking satisfying.

Learned Lua for an hour, I think its a fun language to mess around, but i’m still figuring out what i’m going to use it for...

How do you guys deal with "senior" devs that want to use you because they're not so "senior"???

Situation:

There's this SR Frontend developer that keeps asking me for "suggestions" to modernize the frontend.

This dev, was asked a very simple ticket involving some JS and CSS.

I had to do the JS and this dev modified a VENDOR CSS (that was all she did)

She logged 3d6h of figuring out the ticket and "doing a bunch of cross browser testing"

I logged 2 hours to see what to do and implementing the change.

Now she is asking me to join in a group so "we" can come up with a plan.

I hate how people bullshit their way up

Once spent 2 hours figuring out that I wrote succes instead of success in a jquery ajax call

This experience helped me write success properly on an English exam, so at least it was helpful

Dear companies..

There is a fucking difference between:
-pattern recognition
-machine learning

And
- artificial INTELLIGENCE....

Learning from experience is NOT THE SAME as being able to make conclusions out of unknown conditions and figuring out new stuff without any input.

When you're helping someone with a bug for ages and then try something random and it's miraculously fixed so you have to spend another hour figuring out why...

when you're spending 2 hours figuring out why your class isn't picked up, and then notice a typo in your namespace.

I spent hours figuring out why my html5 video autoplay didn't work on Android. I muted it like they said, I tried many different ways to play it, even with a 3rd party video player, nothing worked. It's actually because my Google Chrome was on data-saving mode. Motherfuck.

So before the Age of JavaScript, when programming was trying to be an engineering discipline, I felt like we were getting close to figuring out what worked and what didn't. We had rules of thumb (more general than Patterns) and code smells.
Then JavaScript came in and no one had time to think about "engineering" anymore. I'm fine with MVP and small iterations, but the disdain I see for making code clean and extendable and improvable is baffling (and annoying). First-time coders might never have had to fix someone else's code, but two weeks in a chair should have fixed that.
It's not that understanding code is so hard (although it can be); understanding the _intent_ is hard. This MVP is great, but when no one had time to document what is actually supposed to happen, programmers have to reverse-engineer the *design*.

I enjoy solving problems, figuring out puzzles and learning new things.

It took me 5!!!! fucking hours to do it but I did.

I got linux to work with my RTX 2070 oh my god

Most of that time was spent figuring out what exactly was wrong because the problem is hella common but the cause doesn’t seem to be so i was sent off in the completely wrong direction a bunch of times

Apparently Nouveau doesn’t support my GPU yet and installing the binary driver from nvidia seemed impossible but i pulled it off thanks to some random stranger on askubuntu.com

Unfortunately i got it working on elementary os instead of ubuntu so now i have to go install ubuntu 🤷‍♂️

That NaN is considered a number in JS.

Half a day I spent figuring out what went wrong.

MOTHERFUCKING PROGUARD with all your fucking flags

-keep my ass
-dontwarn my balls
-dontshrink my asshole

FUCK YOU for all the hours I have to spend figuring out how to make you happy whenever I update guava or any other damn library GO FUCK YOURSELF

:)

Me: hey mr backend guy, front end guy here, having some trouble with $thing, here's a detailed explanation of my issue, could you let me know if $thing is still active?

Him: hi

Me: ... hi, so about that issue I'm running into...

<crickets time="1hr"/>

Him: ok........checking ....

<crickets time="2hr"/>

Him: (offline)

SSSSSSOOOOO guess I'm figuring this one out myself

My friend's finally figuring out basic static RE, i'm so proud

Unless you're editing actual fucking JSON and not a JS object, do this:
{
name: 'John Doe',
phone_number: '12345',
}

Not this:
{
name: 'John Doe',
phone_number: '12345'
}

Note the presence or lack of a comma after the last field. In this way, when you add a new field, you only have one line change in version control, because otherwise you'd have to add that no-longer-last comma and thus make two line changes. Not to mention you can forget to add it and spend some time figuring out what is wrong.

When my friends say they like programming when all they ever did was figuring out how to upload an excel file to R

I don't need you to reiterate what the problem is. I am aware. I was the one who told you what the problem is. Via email and Slack. Why do you keep restating it to me like you are the one who figured out? I know the table isn't syncing with the third party object. I'm trying to figure out WHY. No amount of "I'm pretty sure the sync process is broken" will trigger a solution. Stop coming into my office every 5 minutes with a new "revelation" that wasn't even your own. This isn't my code, and since the owner of said code is not here to fix it, I have to spend some time figuring out how this damn thing works. SO PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LET ME WORK SO I CAN FIX THIS

So Chrome 63 automatically forces https to anyone working with a domain name finishing with ".dev". Thank you a lot, I was planning on loosing 4 hours of my time figuring this out.

Years ago, one of my friends in college was taking an intro to CS class. He asked me for help on one of his assignments. It was a simple Python program, but it wasn't running as expected. I go in figuring it will be easy to fix. But everything looks exactly right. An hour later I'm tearing my hair out! It isn't even entering the function although it's clearly called. I'm beginning to feel very self conscious, as a CS major who can't even debug a 15 line program for a friend.

Then it hit me. This is Python. I used an editor macro to convert all indentation to tabs, lined them up, and it ran on the first try. Turns out, he had somehow ended up with a mixture of tabs and spaces.

I'm not sure what the takeaway is, but I think he got a surprisingly honest introduction to the life of a developer...

I just spend 3 days figuring out how to boot Arch Linux from USB on a Mac.

No need to think small when you have eternity to work with. Right now I am building a network operating system, something I've started around 2 years ago. I expect to have an installable and more or less usable system in maybe a few more years.

When I would have an eternity to work with, I'd first look to make our planet redundant. It's insane to imagine that we only have this blue marble to work with, while we have a fireball of hell as a neighbor in our cosmic neighborhood. What even happened there? I'd like to find out. Granted Musk is already figuring out Mars, and he has the money for it while I don't. I don't like the man all that much (too much marketing wank) but hey, at least he's got us covered there.

Maybe one day we could live forever. Maybe we could map and upload our minds. Maybe we could replace our entire body with synthetic components when the frail meat-based components inevitably fail. Perhaps it could even happen in our lifetime, at the pace technology is progressing at. If and when that happens, sign me up!

Scrum master asks how I'm doing and how I'm finding the project I'm working with.

I complain about the lack of documentation and that it kills me (well, kills my brain with increased migraines) due to my Asperger's as I need CLEAR instructions and not ~something~ I need to piece together from asking from 5-10 different people who all know some minor part of the final answer.

"*You* could do the documentation, lankku, while you're figuring it out!"

Just...FML.

And the reason I was trying to find out this one thing related to a completely different repo I have never worked on was because I was trying to write documentation for something totally different that just needs a login redirect from this different repo. <.<

When you spend 6 hours figuring out how to best encrypt/decrypt your unimportant website cookies just because you don't want people to see how bad you are at naming stuff :x

When you're trying to publish your first Cordova app and the PlayStore release including signatures and stuff takes you 2.5 hours, while the AppStore release takes you 5 days (including getting a huge Mac on your desk, signing up a D.U.N.S. for your company, figuring out the signing/provisioning process and fixing CSS/JS exclusively for iOS).

I remember a time during my internship in the field of web dev, my Bootstrap didn't seem to work, and since I was quite a beginner, I was having a painful time figuring out the bug.

Turns out, one of my seniors had purposely changed the CDN URL from bootstrap to bootystrap :|

He said, "and that's why in web dev, when nothing works, start by checking your imports"

Lesson Learnt xD

while reading rebecca & brain's book on object oriented software. I realised that the programmer is a special kind of person. the complexity he can handle, the struggle to implement a system, from input to output, satellite control, AI, robotics, heck, even the planning required for a simple android app, the complexity is overwhelming at first, then you get your jotter and break it down into parts, and you drive yourself to the edge of sanity figuring out an algorithm, then you go over that edge implementing it, but oh that great super hero feeling when you finally get something to work exactly as specified, I'm not sure people in other professions can understand the satisfaction. I'm very young in the whole programmer world, but I'm growing fast, I'm just really grateful programming found me, I mean, can you think of something else you'lld rather do? yeah, me neither.

No documentation....yeah....just figuring it out! 🤔😲

FUCK THE WINDOWS TEXT EDITOR FOR USING UNICODE WITHOUT TELLING ME. I SPEND HALF AN OUR FIGURING OUT WHY "1" COULDN'T BE PARSED INTO AN INTEGER.

Back in the day, I worked side by side with a designer that actually wanted to build things together, instead of having me answer the dreadful "can we build this?" question and him singlehandedly knowing what's best for the product, the client, the user, figuring out the UI/UX etc.

I setup stable diffusion today. Still figuring it out but I'm like an artist now right? Right?

Next step is figuring out how to train models.

Then I have to make some samples of various words in spectrogram form for training.

After that we'll see if stable diffusion can reconstruct phonemes.

I'll train using both my voice and a couple others, and apply them as styles.

And then finally, I can accomplish my lifes goal.

To have the voice of morgan freeman with me at all times, everywhere I go.

I'm really into coding now for half a year. I really love that kinda flow when there pop up no errors and you work yourself through the code writing using trial and error. It's really addicting and the perfect evening.
But here comes my question: There are sometimes unsolvable errors for me (still not figuring out how to use firebase properly 😞). Is this stuff going to be fewer as I advance in coding, or am I just terrible at googling? To other beginners: Do you have often errors to that feel unsolvable for you?

Ah, the little subtle things we have to iron out as we progress from Junior Developer to Medior Developer.. things like:

- knowing the difference between a carriage return and a line feed (although having worked with analog typewriters helps) and later knowing that Unix-based systems and Windows NT-based systems implement it differently..

- knowing that serialization is important because not all computers interpret data the same way and some computers allocate 4 Bytes for a construct, others 16 Bytes.. and then we get the funkiness of transferring character sets between machines..

- knowing that a whitespace character is not only an actual space (as is known in ASCII as code 32). This one can cause even medior developers a headache, as in: why the fuck does this string function say that "hello I am a duck" and "hello I am a duck" are not the same?! Turns out then in the debugger that when you expand every character in the string you see that string1 contains 32 32 32 32 as usual.. but then string2 contains -96 -96 -96 -96 and you're like.. what the fuck..? Then you know you have to throw \\h regex at it. Haha.

- finalizing our objects and streams (although modern languages do that for us).. otherwise we have to do funky shit like trying to find what's locking a file, which is not so easy to figure out.

- figuring out why something won't work often requires you to not only break down the problem in smaller steps, to use a debugger, but sometimes it's even better to just create a proof of concept, slap some minimal code in there and debug that.. much easier.

- etc.

:)

Me: figuring out APT-69420 (hacker group) representative is a girl.

Also me: Woohoo! You go girl!

Also me: ... Wait, am I being sexist?

😐 idek anymore...

Anyways, them camera footages they released tho...

Sometimes getting tickets from the clients feels like a Sherlock Holmes adventure. Figuring out what the hell they meant, tracking down resources that should be included in the ticket, so much fun. I need to buy a pipe and a spyglass.

It is 4 am now.
There it is. My obsession to destroy electronical things got me once again lol. I found a Canon printer last month and put it in my room to gather more electronical parts (for future arduino projects).

I am quite impressed about what makes Canon printers so different from Epson printers.
Canon really makes it fucking hard to open the inside of the printer.
Epson printers were way easier to open. A big plus for Epson.
Canon printers have weird design. Everything somehow sticks inside of something else with no room inside the printer. Like spaghetti.
Wherelse Epson printers have a plenty of room inside with a better design. No need to waste alot of time to reverse engineer it (figuring every single cable, motor, and what else not out). A plus for Epson here.

Now... what might have impressed me alot?
Take a look at the attached picture. The power on button(design), the display (it is usually soldered on Epson printers) and the "door servant" as I call the part with the blue cables. The "door servant" pushes the stick down when it has electricity.

I never found these like this in Epson printers.

So I am currently figuring out JavaScript, I don't know how to write my _own_ code yet but I know how some statements go. Progress my friends!

Hello fellow developers!

I know this is devRant, but I don't know of a better community with such diversity of developers like you guys and I need your input.

I decided to go on a language journey. I come from a background of php/javascript and feel the need to expand my horizons.

I'm going to write the same app in each language to get the feel of it and become familiar with the syntax and language concepts.

Since I'm a web developer I'll focus mainly on languages used on the web like: Java, Python, Ruby, etc.. But I want to cover others as well, like Objective-C/Swift, C++/C#.

I'm having trouble figuring out what kind of an app would cover most of the ground. I know the basic guideline for this is a TODO app for web frameworks, but I
don't feel like writing a TODO in Swift or C# really cover what the languages are intended for.

I don't know enough about the environments yet to come up with a good idea.

I want something, that can be language independent but would utilize the power of each language in one part or another and is still simple enough not to require weeks of development.

Does anyone have a brilliant idea what that could be?

!rant
After a long time, finally I got an opportunity to participate in a Machine Learning competition.

Brushing up my memory.
And also teamed up with another colleague.
Hope, we both get to learn a lot even if we don't win.

I just read some of my old rants and it's no wonder I don't have more likes. Even I had trouble figuring out what I was talking about.

If you're stuck with something and just cannot figure out where the issue is in your code, there is nothing that helps you more than talking the problem out with someone.

Most of the time you'll end up figuring out the solution yourself while describing the problem to him/her. =)

Fuck corporate proxies. Fuck having to debug them, fuck figuring out how to use them with every piece of software you need, fuck failed builds due to some repository surprisingly being blocked for unknown reason and, most of all, fuck IT staff who deny there was a problem once it mysteriously disappears.

Sometimes the toughest integration challenge is figuring out how to fit my lunch into the break room fridge.

taskkill /f /pid 84284

Just spent the last 2 hours figuring out how to stop the localhosted node server... ended up having to take the damn thing out back and shoot it in the head...

When you get busy figuring out Google's 'Celebrating 50 Years of Kids' Coding' and finding the shortest solution.
This. is. fuuuuuun. :D

How fucking hard is it to write simple documentation with everything you need to get something working for fucks sake. Several fucking hours of my life later and I'm still no closer to figuring out what the fuck is going on with something that should simple. FUCK!!

FUCK YOU GOOGLE

I feel I have zero control as a developer.. You made the shittiest choice by bringing in intellij , you made an even worse choice by adding gradle.. You add thousands of configuration options to manifests, layouts but provide no common place to find documentation for them.. This is just nonsense.. I've wasted endless hours figuring out your dex limits, proguard rules.. It's just frustrating.. Could you be anymore counterintuitive with your unit testing framework! Honestly it's a steaming pile of shit..

the funny thing about bugs, they reproduce on their own just fine, and often where you don't want to them. the trick is figuring out how they reproduce so you can work out how to make them stop reproducing. to do that, you have to intentionally reproduce them.

0 bytes of heap allocated per cycle! Figuring out the Unity profiler actually helped me improve my C# optimization. <3

Fucking SalesForce.. Nothing worse than spending hours figuring out what precisely you need only to find yourself on a "success" labeled rant platform where a customer rep acknowledges the problem and promises improvements....... 4 years ago

Last year i had to resolve a really annoying bug, and figuring out how to fix that was a HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS.
Now i have to make some adjustment to that fix, and the only comment on that piece of code is: "this is a huge mess, good luck if you need to modify something".

FUCK YOU MYSELF FROM THE PAST

There is a special place in hell for people that use Boostrap, only to destroy it and recreate to destroy it and recreate for "customisation purpose"

I just spent a whole day figuring out what the fuck was going on with the collapse system that wouldn't trigger or was dying to trying to, only to discover that someone played the smartass by adding or removing a class when the collapse was triggered, so it would put everything in display:none

FUN FACT : ARIA-DISPLAY="TRUE/FALSE" HAS THIS EXACT PURPOSE, FUCKHEAD

Not the question itself, the attitude was the problem.

I didn't solve the problem that they gave me, and struggled for a while (I ended up solving it an hour after the interview).

Their attitude was that they were both sitting on their computers working and not paying attention to me.

That was disrespectful and stupid. Interviews are also about figuring out whether you can work with the person being interviewed, not just their tech chops. They completely missed the opportunity.

I went to round 2 which was the same. Didn't go for round 3.

Use Xamarin, they said. It will be easy, they said. You will only need to write your UI once, they said. NOPE
Documentation is shit, I've been sitting here for the past hour and a half figuring out how to add an icon to a button in their shiny XAML thing for which they have NO DOCUMENTATION. THEY WANT YOU TO HOE IT OVER C# BUT THEY ONLY GIVE EXAMPLES IN C#. And now I'm trying to figure out where I can download the iOS UIBarButton icons, because you can't use native icons and fuck apple too, they don't want to give em to you.
What a hellhole.
All while my client is constantly spamming me in all ways, distracting me, marking issues as "supercritical" (which makes an alarm ring on my phone and is only meant for emergencies) and otherwise distracting the living daylight out of asking for screens of the UI.

AND I STILL PREFER IT OVER ANDROID STUDIO. Don't even get me started on that one.

!Long Rant!!
Got inspired by Ewin Tang's paper on figuring out a classical computer algorithm for recommendation systems inspired by quantum computers and started to write up an email to a professor in some Quantum research I'm interested in doing. As a high school student, it's VERY daunting to start. Been researching the prof and I'm super excited but it's nerve racking! Like what if she doesn't even open her research projects to high school students and I'm wasting my time? In case, I am planning on asking if there is anyone else I should contact. I'm focused on doing this research with McMaster since it's nearby but I'm really doubting myself. People my age who do this stuff are phenomenal and I feel like I wouldn't live up to that. You guys are probably a lot more experienced in this so if you've got any advice or tips, let me know.
>.<

Holy shiiittttt I finally got 64bit NASM working on windows with cmake. Cmake documentation is fkn bad man.

I’ve got a c++ file that calls a procedure in an assembly file that calls win32 APIs to show dialogs and other cool shit. Compiling was working fine, linking turned out to be a bit of a pain in the ass, but figuring out how to enable NASM in cmake was a nightmare. Why is the cmake docs so horrific 🥺

My uncle has definitely been my biggest influence. My parents never understood computers and refused to buy one. Eventually my uncle gave me an old Win95 box with an 8GB HDD, and 512 MB of RAM(most other people in the world were running XP at this point). The thing was completely useless as a computer to do work on when I received it.

The internet wasn't really a thing yet back then, but I managed to figure out how to clean up the OS, as well as taking it a part and figuring out the parts.

He was the one who taught me that with computers, all things are possible.

From there he was always buying me books about programming, and pointing me in the right direction. He was never one to give me the answer, but always told me where to look or what to ask.

Now I'm the main web developer at my company and I love what I do.

Working with Vagrant be like:
Oh I see you've added new features all over the project files, all good, I'll sync that to the virtual folders. Oh now you've added a line to the css, would be a shame if I stop syncing now for no apparent reason and let you go insane figuring out why the minor change won't show

Need to rant / maybe some advice.

Working remote is hard.
New company, remote on boarding. I feel like my coworkers are robots, and I'm being tossed into the deep end with minimal guidance.

The codebase is so unnecessarily complicated, its impossible to read. I've been trying to figure out how things work for a whole month, still not sure.

My mentor that is supposed to help onboard me is a robot, and answers questions in a somewhat acceptable manner, but it still feels like a lot of "figuring out" is still left for myself.

My other work partner that is also a newbie like myself is also a robot - doesn't talk or ask many questions whenever we have a sync up meeting.

The codebase is huge and feels quite overwhelming, I don't feel like I got a team "with my back", I don't enjoy work as much as I have before, I barely do any coding (mostly reading code and trying to understand how everything is working by setting breakpoints and debugging tests that take foreeeever to run), and some days I'm seriously considering cutting my losses and jumping ship just to save my sanity.

Am I paranoid? Am I just dumb? Should I just suck it up and be happy I have a job? Is this how Remote work is supposed to feel like? Why does it feel like my soul is dying?

Anyone in similar situations, or who can give some insight/advice/etc, I would highly appreciate it.

And this is supposed to be a good company too from the reviews. I don't know how it can be so crappy in reality. Did I make the wrong choice joining? Should I jump ship sooner rather than later? I've only been here about a month or so, and maybe its too soon? Halp!

So i started an (8 month) internship in January. Team of 4 (2 senior/mid level devs + boss) plus 6 or so other people in our other office overseas. Everything was going really well IMHO. Boss's feedback for halfway through the internship was good too.

First 4/5 months were great: loved the team, got feedback and help when i needed it, wasn't stuck doing support too much, etc.

This all changed when both the devs moved to our other office. My boss works from home a lot and has frequent meetings, so i hardly see him. I have a 1 hour window first thing in the morning if i need help from the devs overseas. After that im on my own.

If i get stuck, even on something very small that a more senior dev could explain in 2 minutes, I'm stuck either unable to work or figuring it out (wasting hours of time) for the rest of the day.

On top of this, since I'm the only one around in our office, im stuck on support every week which takes hours of my time usually. Last week support ate up most of my week, which put me way behind schedule on my other work. (That was an unusually busy week of support.)

Feeling incredibly frustrated right now, just wanted to get this off my chest.

So, I fixed this shitty code, real shitty, inlined some shit and shaved off some other shit and it was fixed...

The reviewer says we'd better request a review from the dude that's actually responsible for that piece of shit code - what the fuck...

Here comes this bossy fucker saying they don't really understand that shit so they don't know for sure if there could be a better way...

Me, ignorant as always, popped a vessel figuring out a cleaner way.

I tell those sick fucks that we'd need to change some shit over at another repository, also maintained by the latter turd.

The latter turd says they like my second suggestion better, to which I reply,

'ok, I agree.'

In my mind that pull was done, should be closed and water under the bridge but oh how clueless I was...

SIX FUCKING MONTHS later the same shitbag pops out of god knows where asking if I still wanted to work on the pull....

"Motherfucker, my pull was for this fucking code, not for doing work on the other, obviously I'm not interested in doing that or else I would've opened a pull there instead of here, dumb-dumb" - I thought

Thou what I said was:

"No, I don't. I agree it's a problem better solved at the other repository."

Maybe I was a bit mean, was I? I don't know, honestly, people confuse me

Another case of "couldn't you've told me BEFORE I started working on this?"

I'm making a training in Unity3D for a client, and they want it to integrate with their learning management system (LMS).
I made a simple SCORM package that gets the userID and then uses a custom URL scheme to launch the app with the user data from the LMS.

Tested on multiple platforms, all works perfectly fine.

Than, during a meeting, some says they "can't download it". I ask "which browser are you using?" and he says "I'm using the LMS app."
... the LMS has an APP?

So I start figuring out ways to launch the system default browser from within a app's embedded browser, and nothing so far has worked.
target=_system, nope.
all kinds of weird javascript shenanigans, but the LMS APP browser just blocks everything.
Probably to protect students from malicious software that could be injected in courses, but now I'm stuck trying to find a workaround for this too.

But what sucks the most is that this happened DAYS BEFORE THE DEADLINE!
Well, at least the deadline won't be my problem anymore soon.

Today's accomplishments:
- Actually got the fuck out of bed this morning

- Fixed the RCA connector on the CRT I got from a friend (I got scared while discharging it but it turned out fine). Basically the metal piece that carries the signal through the connector was bent to hell and sticking out, so I desoldered it, bent it right again, put it in, and resoldered it.

- Went to taco bell twice within 8 hours

- Sat and talked with a couple friends for like 2 hours after school

- Met and briefly talked to a very cute girl that my friend introduced me to. She has colored hair (I REALLY like colored hair) and she vapes. So perfect girl for me.

- FINALLY FUCKING STARTED LAUNDRY

Things I didn't accomplish today:

- Working on the web page I posted about this morning

- Getting to school on time (ONE DAY I WILL)

- Staying in school once I was actually there (left during my 6th period to go to taco bell the second time, first time today was in the morning after I was already late to school cause they won't let me into class if I'm late)

- Fixing the boot errors on my laptop (sometimes when I boot it fucking freezes after flushing the journal, I've been trying to figure it out for a while but I have no fucking clue)

- Figuring out why my PS2 doesn't want to recognize controllers or memory cards (got a new motherboard and now it just isn't recognizing the controller/memory card, I feel like some of the traces broke at some point while it was apart??)

Why the hell am I so talkative!!!!!
I think it's better I work alone so that I be less of an annoy for others...
Side-effects of me working at day time..
Missing working at night time all alone..

Just spent 20 minutes figuring out why my .filter() wasn't working. I thought I was going crazy or the universe had shifted around me.

Nope, I was just using class as the variable name.

How's your Monday going?

Don’t you feel like development with Android Studio is 50% figuring out why the f*ck is not building, or running, resetting cache, clean build, rebuild… etc, and 50% coding? Or is it my lack of experience?

When I thought that I was the shit for figuring out that ctrl backspace deleted a word at a time. I was about 10.

My robotics team just got a pair of Puma 500 arms, with an accompanying control computers from 1987. It looks like my week will be filled with manuals reading and figuring out how this super weird hardware all fits together!

Imposter syndrome comes from a lack of experience. Experience comes from trying things and figuring out what works. Find people with experience and ask them what works.

Id happily give up 10% of any prospective salary if it meant that my job hunting was handled by an agent who is somewhat competent in the concepts of programming and primarily motivated to secure the highest possible salary for me. Humanity is really good at figuring out how to delegate tasks so that individuals can specialize. Why can't I specialize in programming and delegate salesmanship?

My apologize to everyone I told that functional programming is declarative.

It's actually imperative. Thank you @AndSoWeCode for figuring that out. I spent the whole day thinking about it.

Lisp is imperative. It's just different way to define the exact data transformations, and that's quite imperative.

On the other hand, HTML, CSS, config files and markup languages are declarative.

But writing the imperative program which is configured with declarative configs seems like great idea. Consider Apache web server and others.

Hennies I need your assistance!
My boss has put me in charge (wow yes I was surprised too) of figuring out what a good solution to our current testing nightmare would be. Therefore my questions for you are:

What kind of testing strategy do you work with at your job? Do you use any tools for it? How's the division of unit tests/service tests and/or UI tests?

I'd really appreciate you guys' input on what works (and what doesn't, in case you're living a nightmare with testing daily)

I feel fucking proud of myself.

I spent the better part of three days trying to figure out how to compile source code on Linux using ./configure and stuff and best place to put the compiled source after running make and it all works. It's such a small thing but seeing as I've been tarnished with Windows this is a great accomplishment to me.

Also because I wasted days figuring this out, jumping to multiple topics, progressing deeper and deeper into different topics to figure it out... abstraction would've been nice...

Just got an email from HR asking everyone to put in leave for Christmas by TODAY.
Christmas is like a month away...
Before this email, there is no similar announcement whatsoever informing we have to put in leave by certain date.
It's lucky I checked my email (because I basically ignore it unless someone comes and tells me he's gonna send me something through it). It's luckier I got my Christmas plan sorted.
But... What if I'm still figuring out what to do for Christmas? Is this reasonable?

DO NOT, i repeat, DO NOT USE "scapy.all" in python3.

I spend hours figuring this one out. In one commit i added tests and other tests not connected to my tests started failing. I ran the tests several times and also checked the rng-states, but everything was the same as on the commit before...
There was one additional error message i decided to check out, which was the result of "import scapy.all" (that's a module that contains all the scapy-exports). I removed that import and used the right packages and suddenly: all tests passed.

Fuck this inconsistent piece of crapware that has its python2-files in the pip3-repo and gave me that hell to debug.

I'm in this weird place where I want a job but also want to learn new languages so that I have better chances of getting a job. I also really like learning and figuring out new ways to develop things and seeing what's out there.

Spent a good minute figuring it out, but ES modules are pretty great. Using Node.JS 13 (and the --no-warnings flag) I can use the exact same file on both client and server. Wonderful!

is the job of being a "software engineer" (code monkey) supposed to be many parts of wannabe archeologist figuring out what the fuck is going on, happened, and reading the codebase , so you can figure out how to implement your jira ticket?

Have you ever worked on a solution for weeks, or maybe even months, and then hear from your boss that that feature is not so useful as we though and won't make it to production?
They paid me for nothing, but at the same time I spent stressful days trying to figuring out how to make something nobody will ever use…

It happened so many times in my life. 😪

yellow lemon tree sound starts:
"i'm sittin' here in a boring room, just another rainy sunday afternoon, i'm wastin' my time, i got nothin' to, i'm feelin' so lonely i'm waiting for my fucking graph coloring program to finally finishing this fucking piece of graph coloring in which i spent the last four days figuring out what the goddamn problem is and for some reason my arraylists and my hashmaps didn't get along that well and now i hope that i have finally found the solution to my problem and let this fucking piece of shit of program run otherwise i'll get crazy, but nothing ever happens, ... , and i wondeeeer ... *dum dum dum* *ding*

By far, the worst docs I've read was for a library I used to use for almost every project. I didn't really have to look at the docs because I knew the ins and outs of it. Time went by and I stopped using the library. I came back to a project that used that library, and I had the hardest time figuring out what was going on.

It was a library I wrote :/

I got much better at documentation after that. I started doing DDD (Document Driven Development) because many developer's first experiences with libraries are with the documentation. It allowed me to interact with my library before I even started development.

My first exposure to computers was the TRS-80 (a.k.a. TRASH-80) my mom (the city Library Director) bought for library patrons to use. It’s data store was on a cassette tape and programs came on cartridges, IIRC.

Around the same time I was learning to do Logo and BASIC on an Apple IIe in 5th grade.

My cousin’s Commodore 64 came next and my grandma saw how my interest in computers was blooming, so she suggested I use the savings I had built up from birthday money and mowing lawns to buy an IBM PC/AT 8088 clone. $1,300 later and lots of time in my basement figuring out how to build it all from separately-shipped components, I was on my way to learning Assembler, BASIC, and DOS.

There's just no better feeling than figuring out some obscure bug and fixing it

Computer science vs software engineering?

Software engineering is all about people. You have to communicate with the business, realizing their needs, figuring out their processes, optimizing them, all this before the first line of code is written. Then, you have to manage your direct reports, and if you have none, write code with people in mind, people who will read it after you. As they say, code is for people, not for computers. Then, you have to improve the app listening to users, again, people.

I can’t assign a software engineer a role higher than middle if they’re bad with people.

If you wanna do cool stuff with computers and be a misanthrope, do computer science! It’s a very prestigious field where you are left alone with scary math and fundamental concepts. If you’re successful there, you’ll have a mad asocial scientist card, and no one will ever insist to you that people is important. They will just accept that they shouldn’t annoy you, and you are “allowed” to yell at them because you’re “special” and a “genius”. You can hate them 24/7.

How do I get gud? Been coding in Python for a while now and I still have a little bit of a problem figuring out where to go. I can read the docs and generally construct a decent program if it's fairly simple. Go anywhere beyond what I know I end up having to google for examples. Not sure if that's how many people do it but I feel like it's cheap. I feel like I'm taking bits of code, modifying it, and slapping part of my own code to it. I'm trying to teach myself how to make my own program without any major help from Google.

I'm still new so I think it's okay for the most part but I don't want to be a half ass programmer who more or less just googles and slaps things together. I want to sit there, think of a problem, and think "Oh I can use this module to help me with this and I can create this function using xyz and that should solve it!" I'm sure part of that comes with practice, but what else can I do to get gud and not be a lousy coder?

My work day lately:
5% new code
95% figuring out how the old shi...code worked so I don't break everything

Ugh... Spent the last hour figuring out why my Python script wouldn't send an email. Turns out my computer used a DNS cache that pointed to the wrong name server, but BT (shitty UK ISP) takes fucking forever to update their DNS. And obviously you can't edit the modem's DNS to the Google DNS, because fuck you that's why.

I want Richard's decentralised Internet right now.

How to go from manual test cases to automation is NP-Hard. Figuring out we have less time than we need is not.

I swear I still cannot figure out how to adjust my chair comfortably for the life of me, and I don't want to embarrass myself by sitting down on the ground and spend 30 minutes figuring out how to make the back not fall when I lean back.

the worst project without without documentation I had to work with was a huge web 1.0 webapp that had been compiled / uglified into a huge blob of javascript with meaningless variable- and function names that were no longer than 3 characters. needless to say, the original source code was gone and the original author as well. Spent weeks figuring out where to implement the new feature, while it could have been a few hours of work.

Figuring a way out of the industry to do what I love.

ASP.NET Web Forns?

Can't tell how many times I printed out the page lifecycle diagram for myself or a coworker. So many hours lost trying to figure out which lifecycle hook to use for a specific scenario and then have it all break down because something new was added to the feature. Or figuring when data can be bound, or doing some hack because things break when handling a POST event or some shit.

Overly abstract piece of technological excrement. Might as well express the thing in contemporary dance and check that into source control instead of that ungodly mess.

The switch to AJAX and API calls was such a huge relief it's almost hard to explain in words (I can do a dance tho). And then upgrading to AngularJS, man, worlds apart...

I don't care how much they pay me (okay, you got me...), I'm never touching Web Forms again.

My first exposure to computers was at my dad's factory when I was only a few years old. I remember figuring out how to turn on the computer, open Paint and make a masterpiece.

Over the next couple of years my Paint masterpieces only improved, while I also learned how to connect to the internet and explore other interesting things.

Fast forward 20 ish years and I've graduated with a double bachelors degree and pursuing a career in software engineering.

Woo computers!

This is probably a standard pattern/algorithm, but I feel pretty good about myself figuring this out.

I was doing a programming challenge and found myself with 2 lists of integer points (x,y). I needed to see where the points converged and identify those locations. Of course I started with a brute force approach and did nested loops to find these locations. This was taking WAY TOO LONG. These lists were 200K each. So checking with naive looping is 200K * 200K operations. Which is a lot.

Then I thought, well I am checking equality, so I will create a third map. The index to the map will be the point, and the data will be an integer. I then go through each list once incrementing the integer for each point that exists in each respective list. Any point with a value greater than 1 is a point convergence.

Like I said, this has got to be a standard thing, so can someone tell me what algorithm this is? I am not sure how to search for this.
I am fuzzy on complexity notation but I think the complexity started at n^2 and was reduced to n. Each list is cycled over once.

The Berlin rental market is so bad that I have to spend my long weekend figuring out how to write a bot to send applications for me.. (or keep hitting F5 all day and still be too late)

Figuring out how to install Ruby on windows, is this real life? Or is this just fantasy, caught in a landslide? No escape from reality.

Does anyone think tech recruiters are failed used car salesmen?

Bad experiences this week

One reached out to me on clearance jobs to apply for a job that I applied for, interviewed and was turned down for because of course they do not know Javascript is not Java and they were looking for a Java developer. She didn’t remember and then never responded. Out of spite I replied all to the last email that company sent me but of course no one responded.

This person who says that she is a recruiter for GOOGLE does not know the difference from UX designer and UX developer.

“ UX design still involves coding... idk where you got information that UX designers don't code but they absolutely do. UX designers are simply front end software engineers that work on refining the user experience of a particular program app or website.”

I don’t know because I used to be a fucking UX developer and used to work with UX designers??? Who didn’t code because figuring out what humans what is tough enough on it’s own. UI designers may know html/css but that is it.

I know we are going into a recession and I need to start being nice to these dumb recruiters because I may need them one day.

Messing with three.js library. Now imagine I have a letter in 3D, from which I removed all the faces and replaced vertices with white dots (plexus effect), and all around are like thousands of dots. Now I wanted to put single sprite somewhere on that letter. So I wrote a short script doing that. Fast forward an hour. I am figuring out, why the FPS significantly dropped to like 0.5 fps or what. Checking various browsers, even downscaling image from 512x512 sprite to 64x64, checking whole stackoverflow why is just one fucking sprite causing a lot of trouble and such an fps drop. Trying everything except... I wrote that function inside loop rendering those thousands dots all around. Lol my computer almost catched in fire rendering that shit.

Must to say, in chrome it had 0.5fps, mozilla had around 15-20 fps which is A LOT better.

!dev. Been working on a simple and 'cheap-ish' enclosure for my resin printer to evacuate fumes out a window. 100% not the best or cleanest looking method but I like it. I don't usually do things with my own two hands so this was kinda fun. Probably will do a V2 in the future with my brother teaching me to do more hands on skills. And a MUCH cleaner end result. This was him telling me what i needed to do and me figuring out the how on my own lol

Now to finish v1 I just gotta put the fan controller outside where I can physically touch it. Cut holes for its wires. Then foam anywhere that stick on door foam didn't work that air can escape. Ohhh and attach the actual duct and window parts

Wasted an hour figuring out why the backed up files and pics from an OTG device cant be seen on my laptop (linux)

Fucking OTG file system formatting is exFat. (i know i should get exfat-utils)

I honestly do not understand the hate for Macs. I know I'm not the first to rant about it, but it's sad that I have to. Yes, you can build a crazy PC with 172828 cores over-clocked to 79Thz for like $7 and have a taco along with it, but that's not the point. Each of them are good for their own things. Maybe, I don't want to spend the first 13 hours figuring out which version of Linux I need to run after I get a computer. I mean give me a break. Each of them are personal preferences. What people often don't see in Macs are value you get with service and surprisingly useful default apps (I'm looking at you Open office) and a solid feature set. Why am I even writing this, it's fucking 2AM.

Got a chance to work again on a Spring project after a few years of working with JavaSE.
All these horrible memories started rushing back. SpringJPA and its dark magic that only works unintuitively and under very certain conditions...

Ooooh boi. Now I remember. I remember it all.

Why do developers enjoy being squeezed into frameworks and enjoy spending half of a day figuring out how to make the application code compatible with the said framework rather than just writing code that they have full control over...? Masochists much?

I spend all day figuring out how an old POS code works because manager asked me to... but then he sends me an email **in the afternoon ** that gives me a bit more context n info...

Web code editors are shit for interviews!!

I was given a timed interview test to code on a hackerearth’s code editor. First of all I have never used hackerearth’s code editor because they suck. The problem was very simple and I cleared the round anyways when an actual human saw my code. But my point is why are programmers creating shit editors for other programmers in a timed environment. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me how the fuck I should take an input and output that in this shit editor. The code logic was ready but the test cases failed.

So Should I be learning about hackerearth’s shit code editor in an interview with a timer or should I be judged on the code logic in the specified time?

I seriously find these web code editors most of them annoying. Cause they aint good enough. You need time figuring out the tools first and then code the logic.

Usually in your job you’re gonna use the editor of your choice. Not a fucking shit fucked half arsed hackerearth code editor. My rant is for those of you if you’re taking interviews on such platforms, be there. Don’t rely on those platforms. This automated crap is still crap.

JavaScript: A machine where the gear for a diesel engine is plugged into an electrical engine and every axel, bar and movable part runs at its own independent speed. I spend my time in JavaScript figuring out how to make every element work together while munching anti-psychotics.

We had a planning meeting and it was mentioned that a specific story is too big and needs subtasks.

A team leader took responsibility to do that and guess what? The person just created two or three subtasks without any f*** content.
Yes, just a generic title and have fun figuring out the responsibility of each subtask.

Incoming 5G-network's coverage is being resolved with natural ways

Finnish communication agency is figuring out ways to install mobile mini cell towers to moose and deer. The goal is to enhance network coverage in low density living areas. Safety of the network would be ensured with injections and deworming. Prototypes have been tested with voluntary public servants, and the results have been promising.

Why is the C++ build and package management system so complicated? I feel like whenever I work on a C++ project, I spend more than half my time just figuring out how to set up the environment, build the binaries, run the tests, when I’d rather and should be writing code.

I think the difference between a monkey and a good developer is that good devs ask why? And try to find out.

Whereas a monkey just does what he's told and learns just enough to do what they need to do, usually by being told directly rather then figuring it out themselves through trial and error.

TLDR: I didn't & still not sure if it is..

I love bug hunting & fixing & figuring out how stuff works, but many will argue this is not even real programming..

Long version how I ended up programming:
Back in highschool, I was deciding between english and mathematics & computer science.. I filled in the form for the latter. Got a change of hearts but I already gave the extra/backup empty form to schoolmate..

Figured it's for the better because it's a hell to get a job as an english teacher/prof anyways + I dislike comunications with people + documentation (if any) is in english etc..

At the end of first year, I didn't even apply for all the exams because you had to have both programming 1&2 to pass or even be eligible to take the year again.. I figured I'd fail them, so once I actually passed both (& actually not with bad grades), I was fucked.. had to retake the year, which means I lost time + still had to pay the rent etc.. decided to drop out and return home and do the IT engineer course instead to at least have some formal education to help me find a job. Finished that without problems, I 'specialised' in network administration.
I got a job straight out of school as a web developer.. the irony.. got some conflicts with the boss and was terminated (material for another rant).

Later I sought out admin jobs, but got declined because I was overqualified and had programming experince. FML, right?

Ended up sending out mandatory job applications for IT administration & programming to not lose the bonuses & got called up to a meeting in the company I work for since then.

No qualifications for .net & MS technologies, but they liked my CV so the ended up setting up the interview anyway. I didn't know half of the technologies and concepts by proper name, but they figured I understand enough of the content to give me a try. A few years later, I got the most fucked up project they have because of my love for new thigs and trying to understand everything. It's aaaalmost bearable now.. still needs a lot of work, but I'm happy where I am. Saddly, I'm still second guessing if I'm doing a proper job as a dev, but they seem to be very ok with my work. (:

I just got Jenkins all setup locally, setup the first pipeline, get docker working with it, setup the build step, setup the test step and more.

In under an hour.

Not too bad for the first attempt.

The hardest part was figuring out the GitHub credentials.

———

Actually, the hardest part was keeping an eye on the dude in the booth next to me who has delusions of grandeur and likely other mental illnesses.

Had to keep an eye on him while he was pointing around the room (usually at me) and saying shit like...

“Ugly, ugly, all of you are fucking ugly”

“Fuck you, fuck you too!”

I’m sitting over here thinking...

“Bud, you got 3 teeth, you smell like shit and your rambling to yourself... fuck you you ugly piece of dog shit! Let me do my work I peace.”

The hardest thing about writing code that works can be logic. For example, figuring out how to say you want to go to the next page when the form submit button is pressed, but not actually move to the next step is an error was thrown during processing.

This is one of those times when. I force a random member of my family to sit there and listen to me talking, pretty much to myself, until I figure it out. But hey, it generally turns out pretty good! (If not my energetic nephew)

You know you want to quit life when: You spent a whole 4 hour journey looking for a missing property in css that you never added expecting other elements to behave a certain way and you sit there neanderthal looking figuring it out.

A friend frequently asks me for help with Java homework.
Today we spent half an hour figuring out how to use some ass-backwards linked list implementation his lecturer provided.
The list itself acted like an iterator, keeping track of a 'current' element that had to be reset to the list's head manually every time you want to iterate over the list. There were insert and append methods that call each other for no good reason and most methods would throw the same generic checked exception.
Also they're told to use BlueJ which has the ugliest debugging tools i've ever seen.

"Let's join two views and create a custom column that acts as a primary key so that other tables can treat it like a foreign key" said no dev ever.

Or at least I had thought that until today when I started figuring out why our queries are so goddamn slow. I hate the previous devs so much.

When you spend hours figuring out a workaround for a problem and then when you finally solve it. It's beautiful. But then you find out the solution's a few clicks away on stackoverflow 😡😡😡

Just spent 2 days figuring out the issue for flickering of path drawn on canvas through sockets.

Every team member had already tried to figure out the bug.

I had checked almost everything and at last I was about to give up.

I gave a try, and it worked. How, no one knows...

Just changed 'lineData' to 'JSON.stringify(lineData)'

:)

The real web development is optimising the shitty front end code.
The task assigned to me is optimisation of dashboard page of website which was developed by freenlancers.(end of contract from their side)
The front end is mess. Individual js files (bootstrap, popper, jQuery, jQuery ui, loader and main) loading in production inside head tag of html file
No text compression.
Every template has random number of their own js files in any block of template. Nothing structured. There will be fantastic waste of time figuring out file dependencies.
Same with css files. Some are scss, some plain css. No compression. No proper modules.
Basically, I have to go through 25-30 html files. Then understand, which template is extending which one. Go through all js and css files in each html file and again understand dependencies between them
This is gonna be real fun.

Comment the language which you hate the most..

Me: Java; figuring out the reasons

Don't have a cs degree, when I was in college I didn't know what I wanted to do, so I got an bachelor's in math figuring that would open a lot of doors. Did a boot camp after college to test the waters and found out i had a real passion for engineering. 2 years later I am teaching people with Masters in cs how to get shit done at my job. Morale of the story, your education in the theoretical doesn't mean shit when it's time to get practical work done.