4am

"I need to brush my teeth before going to sleep 😵"
*goes to bathroom*
*washes hands*
*goes to bed*

1minute of heavy processing later

"FUCK"

Holy fucking shit. I just went to my first Java class at uni (3 1/2 hour long one at that) and I havent felt so damn irritated in a while.

Some background:
So first, I only had about an hour of sleep last night and a full day of work before this class so I was more cranky than normal.
Theres only 7 students in the class, 6 others plus me. I am the only one with any resemblence of programming experience. The teacher also claims to be a linux developer.
This is a three part course series. Java 1, 2, and 3. All taught by the same teacher.

The fuckery:
-teacher spends 48 minutes talking about text editors. Not even IDEs. Just talking in depth as fuck about notepad (notepad. Not notepad++ )and atom and textpad. Those three only though, nothing on vim or emacs or ACTUAL IDEs. 48 minutes.
- I briefly mentioned learning node.js on the side and am now the "javascript girl" to my teacher. I'm probably less experienced with js than any other thing i ever practised or studied.
-professor saw linux on laptop and asked what distro. When I said arch he said "oh no you shouldnt be using that Its not really for beginners" ... Uhh what makes you think I'm a beginner to linux? Or does he not think I should be using arch while learning java? Either way its really ridiculous and irritates me that he would discourage anyone from using any software/OS/anything, regardless of what it is or skill level.
-teacher moved a bunch of content out of the course because theyre either "concepts that are never implemented anymore" or "arent critical to know to master the language". These particular topics that were removed? Multi-dimensional arrays, scopes, and exception handling. EXCEPTION HANDLING.
-he writes a hello world program and displays it on the board, proof of it working and everything. He tells the class to write the same program, compile and run it. Never did I guess we would spend the remaining hour and ten minutes of class struggling with fucking hello world programs. Especially when the correct code is on the fucking projector.

And I get it guys, everyone starts somewhere. People have to learn from square one. But these kids have no fucking interest in this. One of them literally admitted to pursuing this degree for the "lavish life" that comes with the salary. Others just picked programming because they didnt know what else to choose to get into the school. It fucking saddens me. I hope that one or some of them end up caring and finding a passion in this field, otherwise I feel fucking sorry for them having to spaghetti code their way through life to get a paycheck cause they couldnt be bothered to put in the effort. I feel even more sorry for any devs they work with in the future too.

The other annoying bit is that I can't test out of this class!! so it looks like for either 7 hours a week ill be bored out of my fucking mind with these beginner concepts or ill be helping others fix really stupid shit in their code (like putting quotes around hello world so it would actually print the string).

Fucking hell. Waste of a semester class.

So I have complained to our landlord about a noisy neighbor who keeps blasting shitty music at midnight, and technically its against the law as well, but this bitch ass joke of a human being ignored even the most highest of authority.

Seeing I can't solve it with democracy, I finally gave up with any reasonable type of way to restrain this motherfucker (even calling police didn't help) and went full asshole with him

I know his WiFi uses WPS PIN, but I'm not gonna throttle his network, I want to piss him off so much he'll regret living beside me, or at our place entirely.

So I performed a Evil Twin attack, I had my Raspberry Pi act as a both cloned AP and a deauther. Finally the plan came to effect.

I ran the deauther in his AP, effectively disconnecting his devices, and had the devices connect to the cloned network. The primary aim of my attack is to annoy this bitch ass to the point of no return. The project I used serves a website on the cloned AP like a update for his router. I intentionally made it run overnight, blasted Lo-fi hip hop and went to sleep. Before I dozed off, I can hear their scream of rage because they can't blast their music at full volume (waddaya guess, they use Spotify).

I finally woke up the next day, and I find neighbor complaining about me, and they were trying to tell the landlord I was hacking them. It's technically true but its not as bad as domestic disturbance for a full fucking week.

Landlord asked me if I did it, I declined, she believed me (I know she does because she knows I'm a pure soul unlike this mofo). Then he left frustrated, threatened to sue me for hacking.

I just smickered, he can't really prove anything unless I was being sloppy.

Nowadays I get good sleep and finally we live in a quite peaceful place now. Now you may ask, what happened to that guy? After he threatened me, the next night he found his things outside his own room, he was kicked out by the landlord.

Moral of the story: we ain't hating on your music taste but don't showcase it like its the most important thing in the world when everyone is sleeping. Case and point, don't be an asshole

Father bought a PC in 1997. Back then very few had it. I learned doing things like accessing the internet and sending emails, among others. I remember having added age on websites to be allowed to sign up at times :P My sisters used to play games on it sometimes. The first few ones we had were Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation, Tomb Raider Chronicles, American McGee's Alice(Which caused us to upgrade the PC xD)... And some others.

I have a memory of this pseudo-3D-looking game where you move in a maze and try answering questions. I want to remember its name, but I cannot :(

We literally have video evidence of me liking the computer as a child, yet my parents either say I'm addicted or deny I've ever liked it before. Not only that, but continuously limiting my time with the PC hasn't been a literal obstacle in my way of trying to do things in their opinion. Funny how my parents think the last few years I've been my worst when they've hurt me in those years so much that our relationship is guaranteed not working out. There were doubts in my head before, but now it's cemented and there is no way of going back. Father, for example, tells me it's too late to do anything with a PC now(As well as how I've been unable to use the PC. He looks at these pro players' footage in some TV show and he's like, „You've been unable to use your hobbies“, as if they have never ever screamed at me for perceived gaming and not actually cared to check), and I need to look for a „real“ job.

Sorry. I went to bed at 2:00 in the morning. Feel like a zombie because of ongoing weirdly insufficient sleep, even though I sleep kinda more than normal. Even when I took Melatonine for that it didn't help at all.

Childhood was where beating began. I was about 6/7. Right when I entered school. The first school that I attended was a private one and supposedly for „Wunderkinds“, while in reality I haven't seen a SINGLE teacher or psychologist approve of it, their argument being that children were basically drowned in work that wasn't age-appropriate(I don't mean anything bad. Just that teaching about Galaxies and all in first grade isn't the brightest idea). There was always a mountain of homework to do and as opposed to some other countries, we had to do it on a day to day basis. We didn't have a week-long deadline. I was predictably not keeping up with it as I could have, had it been a normal amount, so my parents decided I didn't want to study and began their methods of getting me to „study“. I have yet to see a person able to keep up with that school's tempo, no matter the age.

This place was also where I got bullied. I felt I had nowhere to be: At home, the parents' situation, at school, the bully. I never really went outside to play with other children, so I missed that part of childhood.

After the second year of school I was transferred to an advanced German school, called like that because they taught German and not English there. I also got to learn a bit of Russian before they removed it from school. In that period I used to attend ballet. But for less than a year. And piano, which I remember having attended for quite a long while, some years, if my memory isn't fried. I quit it because of it having been forced on me. Last piece I ever played fully was Beethoven's Marmotte.

In this school I was once again the outcast of the class. I had some people to interact with. All of those interactions lasted a few years at most. Then, because of a part of my class choosing me as a laughing-stock N2 and another girl as the N1, I found my best friend, who I still have today. She's the only friend I have nearby.

Most of the time I hated myself. Even today I struggle with that sometimes.

After that came university. This us where I got something like a friend circle at last. But it still didn't last. I got in a relationship with one of the guys, but I was just attracted. There was another I couldn't dare getting close to. Turns out he also had something for me. Then he disappeared from our lives and a year after, I still cannot forget the person. If I want to, I have to deprive myself of my own personality. Not a thing I'm willing to give up. Then I broke up with the guy I was in a relationship with and completely disappeared from the friendship circle. To be honest, I had reasons to. They refused to even try to look for the guy and they called him a friend for years. Sometimes parents hitting me can occur even today, but if I REALLY piss them off.

Now I'm here and oh, my God, I'm officially am aunt now! My sister gave birth to a daughter this morning... She's in Berlin with mother and both she and the child are doing great. I just hope she manages to be a good mother.

TL;DR: Don't ever interrupt me while taking a shit.

>be me taking a shit comfortably in the bathroom, not bothering anyone
>hear my cousin outside calling his gf
>nofsgiven.jpg
>suddenly stuff comes flying through the window and hear her gf laughing in his phone speaker
>stupid asshat was trying to make his gf laugh by bothering me while in the debug room
>scream from the top of my lungs for him to stop interrupting my defecation process
>stuff keeps coming from the window
>my brown creation comes back inside like a scared turtle
>pull up pantaloons
>get out of thinking room
>open up laptop, start ubuntu
>sudo apt-get install aircrack-ng
>enable monitor mode, get phone, ap mac addresses
>vim shittyvengeance.sh
>write small script that deauths his phone and then waits some seconds and then starts over again so he doesn't think it's me
>:wq and make script executable
>sleep 180; cowsay ding dong ur vengeance has arrived; sudo ./shittyvengeance.sh
>tuck into bed and close laptop before sleep time ends
>his call suddenly drops
>"Matt are you messing up with my WiFi again?"
>"Nah man. Not working for me either. Must be localcompany's problem."
>mfw he can't talk with his gf for more than 15 seconds before losing connection
>omgitworks.jpg
>figure that it was the most useful thing I had made in a pc in these two years at uni
>be proud of me for making a stupid script
>think about going back to my pearl white throne
>no longer wanting to drop my supplies
>go to sleep
>mfw forgot to wipe ass

My first story in devRant! Was lurking for quite a while and finally felt like sharing something 🙃

Me and my love-hate Linux.

I lost virginity really early. In the age of 5 it was my first time with windows 95. I spend almost 10 years with Windows before something happened that would change everything. I met Linux. Her forename was Arch. I had a crush on her right from the beginning. It didn't take long for me to abandon windows. Arch had everything I wanted. She had latex which was pretty hot and looked simply and elegant on her. Sometimes she was really hard to deal with and almost drove me crazy, but I knew I fell in love.

Until that day. I had to write a short paper which was quite fun and Linux helped me alot. It was a breeze to work with her. The evening before the deadline she was quite thoughtful. She sometimes was, so I thought it'll be alright, but this time was different. She struggled a bit, so I put her to sleep and she never woke up. I brought her to the emergency lab which was open 24/7. Since no one was there I had todo the surgery myself. After 5 hours I was almost to tired to continue when she finally woke up. I asked her about the things she should remember for me - then I killed her. I started to hate Linux for what she had done to me. The unbelievable stress and horror.

I returned to Windows. Besides that she got a bit more curious what I was doing when and where nothing really changed and she was glad to have me back. I just was happy how simple our relationship was.

One day then, I couldn't believe it at first, I met Archs sister. Manjaro. No matter how strange that is, but it was as if I would meet Linux again for the first time. She was just a bit simpler but as flexible as arch. Since then we are happy together. It seems that we both just grew up a little.

And with Windows? She got even more curious! Actually I have the feeling she is stalking me now, but I don't regret anything!

It finally hit me the other day.
I'm working on an IoT project for a late-stage ALS patient. The setup is that he has a tablet he controls with his eye movements, and he wants to be able to control furnishings in his room without relying on anyone else.
I set up a socket connection between his tablet and the Raspberry Pi. From there it was a simple matter of using GPIO to turn a lamp or fan on or off. I did the whole thing in C, even the socket programming on the Pi.
As I was finishing up the main control of the program on the Pi I realized that I need to be more certain of this than anything I've ever done before.
If something breaks, the client may be forced to go days without being able to turn his room light on, or his fan off.
Understand he is totally trapped in his own body so it's not like he can simply turn the fan off. The nursing staff are not particularly helpful and his wife is tied up a lot with work and their two small children so she can't spend all day every day doting on him.
Think of how annoying it is when you're trying to sleep and someone turns the light on in your room; now imagine you can't turn it off yourself, and it would take you about twenty minutes to tell someone to turn it off -- that is once you get their attention, again without being able to move any part of your body except your eyes.
As programmers and devs, it's a skill to do thorough testing and iron-out all the bugs. It is an entirely different experience when your client will be depending on what you're doing to drastically improve his quality of life, by being able to control his comfort level directly without relying on others -- that is, to do the simplest of tasks that we all take for granted.
Giving this man some independence back to his life is a huge honor; however, it carries the burden of knowing that I need to be damned confident in what I am doing, and that I have designed the system to recover from any catastrophe as quickly as possible.

In case you were wondering how I did it all: The Pi launches a wrapper for the socket connection on boot.
The wrapper launches the actual socket connection in a child process, then waits for it to exit. When the socket connection exits, the wrapper analyzes the cause for the exit.
If the socket connection exited safely -- by passing a special command from the tablet to the Pi -- then the wrapper exits the main function, which allows updating the Pi. If the socket connection exited unexpectedly, then the Pi reboots automatically -- which is the fastest way to return functionality and to safeguard against any resource leaks.
The socket program itself launches its own child process, which is an executable on the Pi. The data sent by the tablet is the name of the executable on the Pi. This allows a dynamic number of programs that can be controlled from the tablet, without having to reprogram the Pi, except for loding the executable onto it. If this child of the socket program fails, it will not disrupt its parent process, which is the socket program itself.

[Thursday afternoon on a call...]

Client: Before we get started, can you create a sitescape outlining all of the pages and sections of the new website?

Me: Sure! I'll go through the website and shoot you a full layout in xls format as soon as possible, that way you can easily make notes on what you want added, modified or removed.

[Two hours later...]

Client: Hey, did you build that sitescape yet?

Me: Actually, I've been on back-to-back calls with other clients.

Client: So when are you going to get it done?

Me: Well, I have to go through the current website in it's entirety, which I'm guessing is about 1,000 pages. I have to determine which pages work fine on their own, which need to be combined for better presentation and which should be removed due to redundancy. That's something that is tedious and takes some time to complete. That, in combination with having an existing work queue that I need to fit you within and being at the end of the work week, we're looking at Tuesday morning to have it ready.

Client: "Existing work queue"? This is ridiculous. We're paying you good money to make our project your only priority. If we wanted to wait days for work, we would have saved money and paid for a cheaper service. You're already gouging us as it is! If we don't get the sitescape by end of day Friday, we're going with another company.

Me: I would tell you that I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but I'm not. I'm not going to feed you a line to make you happy. I'm also not going to work on my days off just to rush something out to you. You hired us because you wanted things done right, not quickly. Your current website is the result of not focusing on quality, but by how fast you can deliver it. We don't work that way. We only build quality products.

By rushing your project, not only do we alienate our current clients, affecting our reputation, but we build product of less than the highest quality. That will upset you because it isn't perfect, and it reflects poorly on us to use it in our portfolio.

If you want to hire someone to pump out this project to your unrealistic deadlines, be our guest. But you paid a 50% non-refundable deposit, so not only will you lose money, but your end product will suffer.

I'm going to let you sleep on this. If you decide tomorrow that another direction is the way to go, we wish you luck. But please understand that if we conclude our business, we will no longer make ourselves available for your needs.

Please find the attached contracts you have signed, acknowledging the non-refundable deposit, as well as the project timeline and scope, of which a "sitescape" was never originally mentioned or blocked out for time.

I hope that tomorrow we can move forward in a more professional manner.

[Next morning...]

Client: My apologies for yesterday. We're just very anxious to get this started.

-----

Don't let clients push you around. Make them sign a contract and enforce it whenever necessary.

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty and an empty one, in case he doesn't.

My dad turned off my laptop this morning, so tonight, before going to sleep I had to tell him, not to do this.
So I decided to do this....
PS: yeah that's my mom's hair clips.:D

NO. NEVER HAPPENING. For the sake of all the fuckery in the world, I WON'T FUCKING WORK FOR FREE. Not as a learning experience, not for contacts, not for future contracts, not for a fucking blowjob from your wife and not even for a place in heaven. I will be bunkmates with the Devil before I build you your website for free. I feel like strangling a cat with my shoelaces and bashing your brains out with the carcass every damn time your balls swell big enough to ask me to build you a 5 minute website for your well-earning business, you cheap bastard. Take a shovel and dig yourself a hole to sleep in, you piece of biological waste.

• Good night’s sleep (8-9 hours)
• Clearly defined requirements.
• A fun challenge to solve.
• An idea of how to begin.
• Music! Something fast paced and/or harsh. I find soft tunes, good lyrics, etc. are usually very distracting.
• Deadlines help, too, even if they make me stressed out and work too much.
• No political BS / hateful and intolerant political comments from my coworkers within the past day or two, as being called a horrible, racist nazi by association absolutely kills my desire to do any work for them. Going two days without something like this happening is exceedingly rare.
• Being left alone, *especially* in the morning before work! The more distractions, the harder it is focus, even if i have peace and quiet later on.

00:00: Yeah I'll change that now, it'll only take 5 minutes.

00:05: well that's done, better do this too though before I forget.

02:20: well that escalated quickly.. Better grab 3 hours sleep while I can.

04:00: Fuck.

Friend asked me, "How does it feel being the CTO of a startup?"

Me: "I feel like the main character in one of those cartoons where train, going full speed, is running out of rail road, so he takes rails from behind the train and puts them in front. And the entire thing is on fire. And everyone you hire is trying to put it out with gasoline."

Friend: "Doesn't your CEO help?"

Me: "Well... He had never seen a train before, and he thought they operate on magic and wishful thinking. And he never realized they need rail track to even run. So... not really"

Friend: "So, it's pretty bad, ha?"

Me: "It's great actually. We just closed our seed round. We're about to launch beta. I might even get 5-6 hours of sleep this weekend 😅"

So there it fucking goes.

Hi. I'm WillibertXXIV.
I'm not a programmer by trade; I have a more than fulltime job as a cook. As for the last year, I spent pretty much all my free time, overlapping my sleep time, to learn how to code.

All that so I can create a game that I started working on the same day I started my learning process. So far it's shit and it's going to stay that way for a long time. Only I can say this. It's my baby. It's fucking ugly and shit but it's mine.

Yesterday I broke it. I broke my baby. I don't know how it fucking happe. When I went to sleep I had a steady 175fps, nice realtime lightning and player / enemy that flowed like running water. I worked really hard to make that happened. Profiling, writing better code, profiling, etc. It's still not good, it's less shit.

I woke up, beautiful day. Not too warm, not too cold, that sweet spot right in the middle. Girlfriend already made the coffee. Perfect. Woke up, sat down to start my morning time work before going to my realjob and

BAM

Everything is shit, 20fps max. That one thing, gfx.waitforpresent, showing up in the profiler eating everything as the game run. Movements are now of stroboscopic nature. Light is still ok but what good does it do now fucking piece of shit. I'm not qualified enough for this shit.

Fuck,
Fuck this,
Fuck this shit,
Fuck this shit i'm out of here.

Couldn't sleep last night. Spent about 5 hours laying down reading devRant.

Mom calls taxi to go shopping. I'm starving so I go with her. The only reason I went was to get food.

Half way there, so tired I could fall asleep while standing.

I order my food. Walk to bus stop. An hour until next bus. Fuck it, I'll get a taxi.

Phone slips out of pocket while in taxi. Goes under seat. Can't grab a hold of it.

Driver says you can just get it from the back before you leave. It will be easier. I put my food down infront of me. And try one last time.

He then spends the entire trip telling me how all these customers keep leaving shit in his car, etc. Meanwhile we almost got into 2 accidents. Anyway...

So we get to my house, I pay. I get out and get my phone. I walk inside the house. Open devRant.

Wait, where's my food?

It’s been a mother fucking Monday... Couldn’t sleep last night and by the time I did fall asleep it was already 4 A.M.

Then this morning, my fucking car locked me out. When I bought the car, it didn’t come with a spare key or a manual key. I finally was able to unlock the fucking thing and boom, won’t start because “they key isn’t in the vehicle.” Replaced the battery and still the same shit... FUCK!!!!

Walked to work in -12 degree windy ass weather.

Lost my cash somewhere between here and there. Haven’t ate lunch..

An hour late to work.

Get to work, boom server down for our Xray images and we’ve got two patients needing CT scans before we fly them out.... Get another back up computer going and low and behold 168 fucking windows updates!

Fuck today, I’m so far done with this bullshit.... oh and it’s starting to fucking snow.

Spelling and punctuation, I don’t give a rats ass if it’s not correct at this point. If someone would like to come and knock me out, that’d be great.

1. Buy a connected armwrist that tells you the time, how good your sleep is, your heartbeat and stuff like that
2. Manage to loose the cable that charges the device
3. Get mad
4. Finally decide to buy a new one after digging in your 50 m^2 flat in vain
5. Your stuff is coming in 12 years, I mean days. Have a lot of advertisement of this particular cable wherever you go for the next two weeks
6. The thing finally gets delivered. Let's not be stupid like before and put it in a logical place, like permanently plugged in the usb port above my computer tower.
7. Find the supposed lost cable at said place.

So, I was participating in a competition, but little did I know that you could only participate in pairs. Seeing that a lot of famous indie devs were participating I was extremely hyped. But since it seemed like I was the only idiot who didn't have a partner I felt like kicking myself. Then a guy about whom I had never heard of before, probably a newbie, comes out of the blue and asks me to be his partner. Since I had no choice, I reluctantly agreed to pair up with him. The rules of the competition were to create a game based on a particular theme in a period of 1 week. To get started, I asked him about his skills as it would be better to know what our strengths and weaknesses were. He said that he was good at art and proceeded to show me some of his "previous works". I was genuinely impressed. Honestly speaking his drawing seemed a bit off but was but for a newbie, it was good. So we decided that he would take care of the art and I would code, create some basic music (nothing too fancy because of the lack of time) and if time permits, refine his art(correcting ratios, colour combinations, shading, etc.). On the first day, he would like to work in privacy and would show only the finished products to me. It seemed a bit fishy, but hey, I am all up for respecting the wishes of fellow team members.
So all was going well, or so I thought, till on the fifth day the guy confesses that he didn't get shit done. Apparently, his "previous works" were random stuff taken from the great land of internet and that he had to leave town the next day. He just wanted to "experience the life of a game developer" and "meant no harm". I flipped out, half lectured half screamed at him then asked him to get the fuck out which happened to be the only fucking thing that he was able to do correctly. I thought for an hour or so, then contacted the staff and informed them about my situation. They said that if I was okay with the handicap, I may continue. I then pulled three all nighters with about 3 hours of sleep (that too in parts of about 1 hour) everyday and was barely able to submit my game on time.
I secured the fifth place, which was pretty good if I may say so myself, but it an important lesson in my life that taught me to never trust anyone blindly.

Personal projects are the best.

Coming home after work.
Cooking diner and cleanup, dishwash stuff.
Giving some attention to partner.
Exercise, because you have been sitting all day.
And then the one hour that is left before you need to sleep. You fire up the project just to realize that you forgot what you have been doing. And start browsing devrant instead.

Great day. let's try again tomorrow.

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn't.

tl;dr; I've worked 117.5h/week for a month because of a project lead that doesn't understand what I do despite countless attempts at explaining

So, once a year I do this large project for a voluntary organization, it takes me about 80h (and this is of course on top of my normal work and voluntary engagement (60-80h/week))

This year, I realized I don't have as much spare time as I used to, so I emailed the project lead several months in advance like "hey, you know that I do all my work on this before the rest of you start working on it, and you know I need you to sit down for about an hour and put together the list of things I need to know to get this done properly. Could you please do that a bit earlier than usual, a week or two extra would make a big difference", they replied "absolutely, no problem!"

Time went by, and about two weeks before I wanted that info I emailed a small reminder. Shit me not, a month later, after a countless amount of reminders I finally get a half finnished version of the list I need, note that this is two weeks before I'm supposed to be done. Which is fine, it's the usual timespan, not what I hoped for as I hoped for an extra two weeks, but not too late either.

Then shit starts to happen

I reply to the list I've gotten with some requests for the project lead to complete some of the information, to which I receive multiple replies with different answers to the same questions, okay, that's fine, I'll just use the last answer.(?)

So, I finnish the thing on time, clocking out on a total of 117.5h of work per week, two weeks in a row. Still fine, it's just two weeks.

Release day!

I arrive at the release meeting, and is greeted by the project lead handing me two papers with the words "we haven't been able to look through your work yet to make sure it's like we want it, but we sat down yesterday and here's a list of how we want things to be". So I remind them that the thing is supposed to be done that day, and that it takes me 80h to redo, and those papers will require me to redo everything from scratch. To which the project lead responds "but it doesn't have to be finnished until December, right?"

That is not true, not at all, in any way.

See, there are 600 people that depend on this project, and they need, yes, need to be able to access it from the day it's launched every year. That is an absolute requirement.

So after trying to tell this project lead, for multiple years, how much time I devote to this project (for free) every year, during a short period of time, and after trying countless times to explain why it has to be done when the project is released, I became quite irritated.

So, during the two weeks that have passed since, I've been receiving about 200 emails from people wondering why the thing isn't finished yet and why they can't use it. (forwarded every single one of them to the project lead) and have been redoing it all during the past two weeks, from scratch.

I'm finally done, I released it yesterday, finally! I accompanied it with a bitter email to the project lead.

Because seriously, this is the worst respect for both my time and the people that should use the project's time in all of those years I've been doing this. This year, I've been ignored multiple times; they've shat on my work because it didn't live up to their expectations, even tough they never told me their expectations; I've been misinformed etc.

And now it's starting to get to me, this is the first weekend in a month when I've been able to shut down my laptop, sit down, drink a cup of tea, read a fricking book, chat with some friends etc, and most importantly, sleep. Signs of the stress I've had for a month now is starting to remind themselves.

And there's this little though nagging me in the back of my head: if the project lead would've worked for an hour in September I would've had to do half the job I ended up doing, on double the time. I hate realizing that they don't give a shit about my part of this, even tough I do half the work.

Then why do I continue, year after year? Because I feel that those 600 people that benefit from this really deserve it! But why does there have to be a dick project lead in the middle that makes me feel sick working on the thing I love the most!

So, as I'm not really used to ranting like this, i have to add that I really have no point with this rant. Just had to get it off my chest!

Some nights I feel like this line was commented out right before I was compiled:

goto sleep;

Best current career choice:
Quit to become a Freelancer.

OH BOY did I sleep bad directly after that decision - no contracts, no sales running.

Oh BOY do I now 2 days later sleep like a dam relaxed, happy baby :) - My network for the win!

The days before handing in my resignation I really looked forward to just leaving, but the actual task again was scary. Why? Cause until then future for me was bound to income, job=stable income = happy me, happy wife, happy child.

Now? Just 4 days later, If all goes to plan I'm already overbooked twice. Truth told!: Couldn't have done it without the network that I built over the years where I was employed. Let's see how this works out :)

I stand up with a huge smile each morning: Just a great feeling!

FKING. LANDLORD. FKING LANDLORD THINKS MY LAN CABLE SLOWS THE FKING INTERNET BACK TO THE 1990s.

- Prologue
I'm renting at a place that looks good af. But the fking wifi is so slow, 80% of the time you can't even send an empty http request.

- Chapter 1
Okay, maybe it's my laptop. *plugs in cable*. Now the requests fail 10% of the time. Better than nothing. 2 hours later, gets a text saying other housemates are having slow internet because of me. FUCK. Unplugs, LAN cable, uses mobile data and cries to sleep.

- Chapter 2
Tries again after a few days. Barely uses the internet (I'm only using it to play games, not even download it and I used more than this with a 2mbps internet). No videos, no music, just small data exchange with a low ping. GETS A FKING TEXT AGAIN

- CHAPTER 3
My sis comes over and complains that the net is slow af. Plugs in LAN cable while no one is around, everything is fine. Sis leaves, I roll up my end of the LAN cable in my room but leave the cable plugged in on the outside of the room. Next morning, it's unplugged. Plugged it back in before I go to work and when I come back, guess what? ITS FKING UNPLUGGED. AGAIN. AND IM NOT EVEN USING IT.

SOMEONE PLEASE STOP ME FROM GOING ON A RAMPAGE SHOVING THE FKING CABLE AND THE ROUTER UP PEOPLE'S ASSES. LAN FUCKING CABLES DONT SLOW THE INTERNET BACK TO THE PREVIOUS CENTURY. ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE NOT EVEN PLUGGED IN ON THE OTHER SIDE. FUCK.

My sleep pattern is royally fucked. I searched around for alarm apps that can help me get back on track. I found one called Alarmy. The list of features was mindblowing. Fast forward a couple of weeks and I’m on vacation. I’m using my mobile data as a hotspot to browse and do research as there are no other internet options here.

My alarm goes off at 6 AM. Everyone besides me is sleeping. Here is where the first problem arises. The only way to turn the alarm off is by taking a picture of something I have at home (This is how I force myself out of bed). I start panicking. How the hell am I going to shut this damn thing off. I try to turn the phone off, and that’s when I realize I’ve made a huge error. The pro version of Alarmy has a setting that allows you to prevent yourself from turning it off at all. Genius me thought that was a good idea. I fumble with my phone as the 1 minute mute timer they give you is slowly ticking down, before all hell breaks loose. That’s when it hits me. I have an LG G3 with replaceable batteries. My violently pounding heart rate start to slow down as I take off the case and slamdunk the phone until the battery falls out. I did it. I’m saved. 5 minutes later I turn my phone on, start the hotspot and get back to my browsing.

BEEP F*CKING BEEP. Alarmy is not done with me yet. It turns out they’ve implemented a new feature that continues the damn alarm after a shutdown. At this point I have ran out of options. I take the battery back out, and now I’m sat here without no phone or internet for the rest of my vacation, and with no clue what to do.

Alright, feature is starting to work, let's go to bed before 2am!

Finally in bed.

"So this stuff is awesome but lets go to sleep now and work on it tomorrow...
....
....
....
Waaaaait, I could add this other feature but I'd be harder......."

My brain is running at full speed at 10 to 2am now 😅

Fucking kill me right now please. How the FUCK am I supposed to get any shit done when I'm learning something and the fucking DOCUMENTATION has been UNAVAILABLE for the past THREE MOTHERFUCKING DAYS.

GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER MICROSOFT.

Fucking idiots.

It wouldn't be so fucking bad if things like this didn't happen all the time.

But when EVERYTHING is FUCKED - ALL THE TIME, it kinda makes a person lose all hope in humanity and technology.

A typical motherfucking day for me:

Wake up
Go to work
Come home
Eat dinner (if I remember)
Attempt to code shit for 1 - 3 hours before I have to sleep
CAN'T FUCKING CODE SHIT BECAUSE:
1. Internet disconnects every 5 fucking minutes
2. DOCUMENTATION SITES ARE FUCKING DOWN
3. Shit Windows is UPDATING
4. a previous windows UPDATE has royally motherFUCKED my PC
5. etc

FUCK

I was stuck with an architectural problem for a few days. Tried to solve it in many different ways. I could always do a quick hack and call it a day, but.. That's not pretty and it would be a trip wire for future developments.

Went to bed at ~2am. Took a few hours before I finally fell asleep. In my dream I was solving the same problem as in real life, except there I found an obvious and simple solution. Woke up at 8am, repeated that solution to myself a few times to not to forget it. Implemented it in the evening and it worked perfectly!

Moral of the story: do not work late. Better go to sleep, rest your mind. You might solve the problem while resting, and you will need a clear mind in the morning to remember and implement the solution :)

p.S. This happened to me more than once.

When I'm tired, I can't do a damned thing. If it takes effort or concentration, I'm useless. Games are just frustrating. If it's something enjoyable, I simply can't care enough to enjoy it. If I read a book, I can't focus on the words, and won't remember anything I read. If its mindless like watching Netflix, I won't remember the next day, or rather I'll remember just enough to ruin it for myself.

So why not sleep?

Because I've been feeling like this every day, all day long for months. No, that vile liquid called coffee doesn't help. If I rest my eyes and stop thinking for a few minutes, I wake up a little and can function normally for a minute or two before passing out again. I'm not depressed, or at least I don't think I am. I feel like my brain died or got replaced with a lizard's.

And this sucks because I'm still during the probation period at work, and learning the sprawling and intricate codebase is actually challenging. And they're giving me large tickets because I was a dummy and impressed them too much.

Idk what's wrong with me, but I hope it stops soon.
I miss being able to think and plan and do anything besides just struggle to stay awake. 😞

I die, go to hell and my punishment is to write software for hell network that is having power problems due to light source disruptions and is running on Windows 95 on FAT32 without any service pack.

Network speed is trough 300bps dial up modem. Protocol is over IPX/SPX.

My task is to write interactive websites that are replacement of modern websites but in VBScript, ActiveX, IE 4.0.

I have 10 managers that tell me what to do and scream when I miss deadline that is set everyday without my knowledge at random times.

They send me an email and 5 minutes later they arrive at my desk to ask me about it.

I must work 16 hours a day before I can leave the place and if I won’t show up police beats me and escorts me to the office.
If I’m late a second I don’t get payment.
I can’t afford to rent a place so I sleep in the sleeping bag.

It doesn’t matter much cause as soon as I fall asleep phone rings until I wake up and my manager screams about the problems he have for about an hour.

There was a time I made an update on one of our client's e-commerce website sign-up page. The update caused a bug that allowed new users to create an account without actually creating an account.

The code block meant to save user credentials (i.e email address and password) to the database was commented out for some reasons I still can't remember to this day. After registration new users had their session created just as normal but in reality they have no recorded account on the platform. This shit went on like this for a whole week affecting over 350 new customers before the devil sent me a DM.

I got a call from my boss on that weekend that some users who had made purchases recently can't access their account from a different device and cannot also update their password. Nobody likes duty calls on a weekend, I grudgingly and sluggishly opened up my PC to create a quick fix but when I saw what the problem was I shut down my PC immediately, I ran into the shower like I was being chased by a ghost, I kept screaming "what tha fuck! what tha fuck!!" cus I knew hell was about to break loose.

At that moment everything seemed off as if I could feel everything, I felt the water dripping down my spine, I could hear the tiniest of sound. I thought about the 350 new customers the client just lost, I imagined the raving anger on the face of my boss, I thought about how dumb my colleagues would think I was for such a stupid long running bug.

I wondered through all possible solutions that could save me from this embarrassment.
-- "If this shitty client would have just allowed us verify users email before usage things wouldn't have gotten to this extent"
-- "Should I call the customers to get their email address using their provided telephone?... No they'd think I'm a scammer"
-- "Should I tell my boss the database was hacked? Pffft hack my a**",
-- "Should I create a page for the affected users to re-verify their email address and password? No, some sessions may have expired"
-- "Or maybe this the best time to quit this f*ckn job!"
... Different thoughts from all four corners of the bathroom made it a really long bath. Finally, I decided it was best I told my boss what had happened. So I fixed the code, called my boss the next day and explained the situation on ground to him and yes he was furious. "What a silly mistake..!" he raged and raged. See me in my office by Monday.
That night felt longer than usual, I couldn't sleep properly. I felt pity for the client and I blamed it all on myself... yeah the "silly mistake", I could have been more careful.

Monday came boss wasn't at the office, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday not available. Next week he was around and when we both met the discussion was about a different project. I tried briefing him about last week incident, he seems not to recall and demands we focus on the current project.

However, over three hundred and fifty customers swept under the carpet courtesy of me. I still felt the guilt of that f*ck up till this day.

Sometimes I have really loose the will to live and find myself face palming multiple times.

I added live chat software a web frontend for a client. Very easy job that consisted of pasting in some embed code. The actual software is very good and has native ios/andriod apps - something specifically requested.

I got a call from my client about an hour ago, saying there is a "serious issue with the live chat".

My client stated the live chat won't work when his staff go home. He asked me what my solution to this was.

Saying "wtf" many times to myself I directed him to a settings within the chat software i.e. an "away mode" where an email is sent when no chat agents are available.

This apparently wasn't good enough and said I hadn't followed his brief of "adding life chat software to the website", which I had.

After a lengthy discussion I found the root of his frustration. He'd signed a contract with a client of his own, stating there would be 24/7 support via live chat on the website.

Obviously there a huge difference between adding a chat widget to a website and committing to having it manned 24/7 :)

After a further 10 minutes of trying push the blame on myself, the client insisted of having the chat software "appear" as someone was always online, even when they are not (people need to sleep ya know!).

Bu design, the chat software requires at least one agent be logged in before the chat status changes to "online" - why wouldn't it.

After a little while I was seriously wondering why I'm involved in this conversation. I jokingly stated: "Well you could always install Andriod/iOS app on your phone, login and permanently leave it running in background. You'd get lots of notifications, but the site would say the live is always online".

The latter was something I said in jest. To my surprise the client said he'd do that on his own phone going forwards. He actually thanked me for my "resourcefulness", lol.

I'm looking at the same dashboard now and there are 407 pending chat requests - his phone must literally be blowing up notifications :)

Ordered a new high storage dedicated server (rented online) today.

The fucker wasn't delivered as soon as I hoped so decided to finally go to bed at 2am.

Aaaaaand then, of fucking-course, I got the email with the deployment notification literally the second before I went to sleep.

No sleep yet anyways, I guess 😅

One of our newly-joined junior sysadmin left a pre-production server SSH session open. Being the responsible senior (pun intended) to teach them the value of security of production (or near production, for that matter) systems, I typed in sudo rm --recursive --no-preserve-root --force / on the terminal session (I didn't hit the Enter / Return key) and left it there. The person took longer to return and the screen went to sleep. I went back to my desk and took a backup image of the machine just in case the unexpected happened.

On returning from wherever they had gone, the person hits enter / return to wake the system (they didn't even have a password-on-wake policy set up on the machine). The SSH session was stil there, the machine accepted the command and started working. This person didn't even look at the session and just navigated away elsewhere (probably to get back to work on the script they were working on).

Five minutes passes by, I get the first monitoring alert saying the server is not responding. I hoped that this person would be responsible enough to check the monitoring alerts since they had a SSH session on the machine.
Seven minutes : other dependent services on the machine start complaining that the instance is unreachable.

I assign the monitoring alert to the person of the day. They come running to me saying that they can't reach the instance but the instance is listed on the inventory list. I ask them to show me the specific terminal that ran the rm -rf command. They get the beautiful realization of the day. They freak the hell out to the point that they ask me, "Am I fired?". I reply, "You should probably ask your manager".

Lesson learnt the hard-way. I gave them a good understanding on what happened and explained the implications on what would have happened had this exact same scenario happened outside the office giving access to an outsider. I explained about why people in _our_ domain should care about security above all else.

There was a good 30+ minute downtime of the instance before I admitted that I had a backup and restored it (after the whole lecture). It wasn't critical since the environment was not user-facing and didn't have any critical data.

Since then we've been at this together - warning engineers when they leave their machines open and taking security lecture / sessions / workshops for new recruits (anyone who joins engineering).

My Perfect Day : Assumption

Woke up at 6. Went for morning walk or do yoga or some sort of stuff.

Came back at 7. Went for daily routine, like bathing and all.

Went to prepare breakfast at 7:45. Prepared some eggs and bread and coffee.

It is 8:15 now. Reading news papers or watching tv and doing breakfast.

At 9 check mails and prepare some stuff.

At 9: 30 went for office. Reached office 5 minute before 10, safe and sound.

Came back at 7 by evening. Did some rest. Prepare dine till 9. Take a bath. Complete the dine.

At 10:30 ready to sleep.

Actual Scenario :

Woke up at 8:30. No time for yoga or morning walk. No time for preparing breakfast as well. Went straight to bathroom. Came back in 20 minutes. Made a cup of coffee. No time for newspaper or tv.

Feeling lazy and tired already. At 9:10 went for office. Before reaching office stopped at fast food joints. buy some junk food. Eat them. Got traffic jam and reached office late.

Started working but feeling lazy. Boss asked twice about the project status and i am unable to think a single line of code.

However, days passed. Boss scolded me. I promised him to finish the work after reaching home.

Reached home at 7:30. Late for no reason. Went straight to bed. Sleeps a hour. But took 20 minutes to leave bed.

Started working on projects i did not complete in the office.

Time fly and it is already 1 in morning. No dinner. Tired as fuck but hungry as well. So made some eggs and eat. Wrapped the task but it is 3:30 in morning and i jumped to bed for sleep.

Loop.

Late in the afternoon right before closing time I wandered into a lunch-having nice little place. There was noone and my sleep-deprived self ordered an espresso. The ~25yrs old barista was kind and smiling and while I was adding some milk to my coffee she suddenly asked:

'Are you an IT guy?'

In shock I said: 'Okay, yes, I do wear glasses and drink coffe, but how did you know?'

'I didn't, but... my printer isn't working at home, can you tell me why?'

At this point I bursted out in laughter and realized that to most people I am a printer fixer. We all are, aren't we?

I completwly hate windows. Tomorrow I've got an exam, I wanted to play for an hour before I go to sleep to relax. Boot into windows half an hour early because I knew it would fuck up somehow (I'm usually on linux, windows is there only for games). Graphics card driver isn't working anymore (AMD), uninstall with their tool, restart. And now windows goes like "FUCK YOU!!! YOU ARE NOT PLAYING SHIT TODAY YOU SAD FUCK!" in the form of "Getting windows ready for you, please don't turn off your computer" for the past 2 hours. I just wanted to play a game and now I'm so fuckin triggered by this non-sense of an OS, how can someone make something so fuckin shit

My manager is so cool at work that he doesn't care if I sleep during office hours or even skip working for a couple of days as long as I meet the deadlines. All he cares about is getting the work done and keeping his team happy.
I abso-frigging-lutely respect him very much and like him as a person.
Unlike my friends' managers in other departments, he wouldn't assign me more work if I finished a project before the deadline.
I wish all the managers in all the companies realise work-life balance is important and act like him.

Deutsche Bahn once again.
Deutsche Bahn and I will never be friends I guess.

I'm at a train station where my train arrives only once per hour.

As if that's not enough time to wait already, the first train got canceled.

I was like "Ok, that's Deutsche Bahn. That can happen (and will happen always). Guess that I will wait for another hour".

Minutes before the planned arrival of the second train, they announced that the second train isn't coming either.

I have been at a fucking train station for bloody 3 hours approximately.

Let's wait and see, if my train will ever arrive.

Honestly, thinking about buying camping tools to sleep at this train station and go to university and come back to this place just because of this problem.

The state of the web in 2020:
discussion sites as a medium are dying. chalk that up to censorship.

reddit is an echochamber. twitter is mostly a marketing platform disguised as (anti)social media. instagram is a self promotion/wannabe eceleb site, and youtube is the new hollywood..quickly becoming irrelevant.

facebook is where I (dont) go to (totally not) ignore all the people important to me.

and email is where I go to send letters bordering on hatespeech to my various local and federal "representatives", in between borderline cyberbullying people stupid enough not to automate their spam marketing in 2020. or talking to left/right self-help grifters about the state of society.

in the grim dark future of 2020, the last bastion of intelligent conversation, free speech, and civility, the one shining icon of hope in a dark world..
is the comment section of pornhub videos where a women got stuck under a bed for the 50,000th time. And all I can think is "wow I never knew how easy it was to get trapped under a bed. They should look into fixing this safety hazard."

newsmedia has jumped so many sharks, the fonz now spins in his grave so fast we could hook him up to a generator. meanwhile people hide in their homes for a disease so deadly you have to be tested to know if you even have it.

while ever more car commercials
are released, set to somber but hopeful piano music to the tune of "in this time of social distancing its important to stay close even when we're apart."

Im beginning to think media has become a poison on society, both television and the internet, and like an ersatz cargo cultist worshipping the great-charles- manson-in-the-sky we should all take a page from the unabomber and smash our televisions with hammers before going outside and sawing down the telephone polls.

I jest of course. But there is no denying the inherent appeal of moving from the unsettling uncertainty of complex societies, driven by expertly manipulated fear cycles, to the beatitude-esque simplicty of pastoral protestant style living, sans witch burning and shoe buckles.

And against the reckoning of utopians who are still fresh from the womb as it were, wet behind the ears and smelling of their mother's pussy, I reject the notion that "up" is a synonym for "forward."
Were it the case, every drinking binge, followed by throwing up, would bring us, with each vomitting, one step closer to heaven. Rather the state of affairs is what it is, and what it is, like most of nature, is a cruel master and a harsh teacher. And while we may binge on digital delusions of grandeur and a greater society, rest easy in the nihilistic and sobering thought that we are little more than 200,000 year old cave men wielding magic bricks, and atomic bombs.

..where water flows more readily from metal tubes in our houses than it does from the nile. where food comes to our door at little more than our beck and call.
where we may bath, and sleep, and *shit*, cleanly, comfortably, and safely, wrapped in the (failing) bubble of delusion we all tenaciously grasp collectively, the thing we call "civilization".

an empire of needful things, wanton and fragile.

if we have not gone mad from boredom, I have no doubt we one day will.

it becomes more and more obvious to me every day, had war never existed, it would have been necessary for man to invent it just to have something to do, that didnt include farming, fucking, or building.

And so enters "political idealogy."

How would we ever have enemies if we were allowed to speak our piece instead of being given the means (and reflex dogwhistle training) to silence and destroy one another?

give a man a gun, he'll rob a bank. give a man a bank, he'll rob the world.
give him a media empire or a tech platform, and he'll lie about the theft and convince one half of millions of lemmings to hate all the other lemmings.

I've become a night worker. To put it mildly, it's become mildly annoying. I start studying/writing code at night and before I know it, it's morning. I can't seem to stop. I then end up feeling weak and sleepy during the day when I need to be awake. If I'm lucky, I get a few hours of sleep during the day. And then at night, it happens all over again. I need to fix this.

This has been said countless times before me, and way better than me that’s supper tired, but I need to rant out

And what I’m ranting out today, is Apple. Its essence, its core, the reason it still exists: the ECOSYSTEM!

The problem with Apple ecosystem is that it’s the ecosystem of a fucking PRISON!

People like it because it works well together , but it’s sure that in a prison, the path from your cell to the cantine is pretty optimized; you get forced there! And you might try to get your food elsewhere, but the walls of the prison are made to be difficult to cross. Especially on mobile, where they’re making it harder and harder to escape, to make a jailbreak (pun-intended). Keeping you the loyal little sheep, or the forcing you to it.

That prison is also made private, a little club, to attract people to it. They even got their own little system to talk to each other, but oh god protect them from their little messages to pass the walls of the prison.

And all that prison is guarded by the warden, watching from high in the cloud. Forcing you to report yourself to him to be part of that prison.

That prison, also, can only be entered with specific vehicles, provided by the prison, to ensure maximum compatibility and efficiency. Good luck entering with a disguised vehicle if you find the official ones too pricey for their parts.

They also provided pressure tubes to send things from one cell to another. While being only simple pressure tubes like any other, they’re acclaimed because they’re apparently easier to use than the other 3rd party pressure tubes that can send things to the outside. Why? Because, oh yes it’s already in everybody’s cells (of that prison, outside is dangerous) and the other tubes have been conveniently being placed somewhere harder to reach.

Another thing they have are those windows that can view the outside. While being maybe less clear than some other windows, they are ok. But if you ever consider going mobile to enjoy that safari with lions, then man do they love bringing you back to that window.

Ok so I’m done with the prison metaphor, or I won’t sleep.

The ecosystem is probably the major reason Apple is still there. You buy from there because you’re a prisoner (I guess I’m not finished with the metaphor after all).

This is a prime example of RMS’s quote “If the user doesn’t control the software, the software controls the user”

AirDrop isn’t some sort of revolutionary tech, it uses a well established protocol that other implementations use to do the same thing. They could really easily open source the protocol and allow everyone to profit, but they won’t, because that would mean you don’t have to buy Apple.

That’s why I militate for open source, decentralized and standardized protocols. Because that way, we control the software, and it doesn’t control us.

All the things I said aren’t so bad because when you buy Apple, you make a choice. But I don’t have a choice, I am typing this on an Apple device, because I need to (I won’t elaborate on that) because of that fucking *ecosystem*

I am really tired, so half the sentences probably don’t make sense, but thanks for coming to my stupid TED talk.

Me: "You know, if I take maybe an hour I bet i can finish this before I sleep..."

Reality: NO. NO YOU CAN'T. YOU'LL STAY UP UNTIL 5, AND IT'LL WORK EXACTLY LIKE I DID YESTETDAY.

On an afternoon the day before delivery, we discovered a crashing bug. At around 2 AM, we had found the cause and fixed it. A short sleep at home, then back to office at 8 AM because the delivery was 200 devices containing that software, and they had to be updated manually because production had put in the old image.

We seized all available computers, even those from marketing who were... surprised. Half-way in the update, we calculated that we wouldn't have enough time until the freight service would show up.

So we asked the secretary that she should be a bit flirty to the parcel guy, invite him to a coffee and chat around to buy us more time. We closed the last parcel just when he figured that he had to continue with his tour.

Note to self: don't read devrant right before bed -you get too many breakthrough ideas and motivation and need to sleep instead!

23:30 :Let me fix something really quick before going to bed.
1 hour later: well actually I should also get this to work...
3 am: 2 hours to sleep left 😑

Just finished our BIG update including a big change in the backend (PHP => NODEJS). So I hope our users will enjoy this one because we are not yet public and our competitor get a lot of clients each day but if we compare our product to their product: Ours is responsive as fucked and have much more stability but less fonctionnalities so we have to add more fonctionnalities before releasing our product to the public. I hope we will be able in a few weeks! With only me and my back-end dev (My employee and friend at the same time) to work on it and they have 2 more devs to their team to use Bubble.. (They are now 6 or 8 devs (wannabes and using a drag and drop website) in total vs 2 (us) real programmers).

A well deserved night of sleep :P

I resigned yesterday to focus on my business full time. After 5 years and 1 previous failed attempt to leave the company, its finally done.

My boss threw his toys out of the pram and was borderline abusive about the whole thing. "it's like a kick in the balls" "you've clearly been planning this (said in an accusatory tone)" "you've said you were leaving before which is why you have 3 months notice now (to which my response was, and that is why I am giving you 3 months notice?!)"

Along with many other comments and general angry tone.

Honestly, I couldn't sleep the night before as I was so nervous. We're a small company and to some degree, a kind of family so I didn't want to break that. The more he spoke though, the easier it got. It simply cemented by decision to leave. They made no attempt to keep me. Showed no support. No gratitude for my 5 years of service. Nothing.

Well, you will be down your only dev in 3 months so good luck, I suspect you'll need it more than I will.

Met colleague at work

Him: You programmers don't like sleeping at all. You should try to sleep and look fresh like me ... Blah blah blah... (You get the picture)

Me: *just smiles and watch him go*

(But what I really wanted to say)

Me: 'Well you know what, most programmers don't sleep much not because sleep deprivation is fun or we're in some kind of cult where it's some daily ritual. But when they need to send in an update; usually on a feature to make YOUR life easier OR just can't seem get their code to run right, and they keep telling themselves; "5 more minutes", "I have a good feeling about this modification" the minutes add up and before you realize it morning! And that's why some of us look like s*** in the morning'

(And then turn around to leave only to come back really quick like I just remembered something)

Me (again): "And don't think that we enjoy it. At least the ones I know don't. It's simply a fr****** work hazard!"

So I have BiPolar and Borderline Personality Disorder and had an interview today. We'll I slept in and missed it. My psychiatrist recently changed my meds to help stabilize me. Now I'm up for 2-3 days before I sleep. I timed it so I would be awake, but ended up falling asleep and woke up a half hour after I was supposed yo be there. I'm so pissed off right now! I've been working my ass of learning to code, buy my own brain is sabotaging me. I just want to be a normal person with a normal job. I love programming because I get to be by myself and work away from customers. I'm so frustrated and feel beat down. I don't know what yo do. 😠😤😡

I am much too tired to go into details, probably because I left the office at 11:15pm, but I finally finished a feature. It doesn't even sound like a particularly large or complicated feature. It sounds like a simple, 1-2 day feature until you look at it closely.

It took me an entire fucking week. and all the while I was coaching a junior dev who had just picked up Rails and was building something very similar.

It's the model, controller, and UI for creating a parent object along with 0-n child objects, with default children suggestions, a fancy ui including the ability to dynamically add/remove children via buttons. and have the entire happy family save nicely and atomically on the backend. Plus a detailed-but-simple listing for non-technicals including some absolutely nontrivial css acrobatics.

After getting about 90% of everything built and working and beautiful, I learned that Rails does quite a bit of this for you, through `accepts_nested_params_for :collection`. But that requires very specific form input namespacing, and building that out correctly is flipping difficult. It's not like I could find good examples anywhere, either. I looked for hours. I finally found a rails tutorial vide linked from a comment on a SO answer from five years ago, and mashed its oversimplified and dated examples with the newer documentation, and worked around the issues that of course arose from that disasterous paring.

like.
I needed to store a template of the child object markup somewhere, yeah? The video had me trying to store all of the markup in a `data-fields=" "` attrib. wth? I tried storing it as a string and injecting it into javascript, but that didn't work either. parsing errors! yay! good job, you two.

So I ended up storing the markup (rendered from a rails partial) in an html comment of all things, and pulling the markup out of the comment and gsubbing its IDs on document load. This has the annoying effect of preventing me from using html comments in that partial (not that i really use them anyway, but.)

Just.
Every step of the way on building this was another mountain climb.
* singular vs plural naming and routing, and named routes. and dealing with issues arising from existing incorrect pluralization.
* reverse polymorphic relation (child -> x parent)
* The testing suite is incompatible with the new rails6. There is no fix. None. I checked. Nope. Not happening.
* Rails6 randomly and constantly crashes and/or caches random things (including arbitrary code changes) in development mode (and only development mode) when working with multiple databases.
* nested form builders
* styling a fucking checkbox
* Making that checkbox (rather, its label and container div) into a sexy animated slider
* passing data and locals to and between partials
* misleading documentation
* building the partials to be self-contained and reusable
* coercing form builders into namespacing nested html inputs the way Rails expects
* input namespacing redux, now with nested form builders too!
* Figuring out how to generate markup for an empty child when I'm no longer rendering the children myself
* Figuring out where the fuck to put the blank child template markup so it's accessible, has the right namespacing, and is not submitted with everything else
* Figuring out how the fuck to read an html comment with JS
* nested strong params
* nested strong params
* nested fucking strong params
* caching parsed children's data on parent when the whole thing is bloody atomic.
* Converting datetimes from/to milliseconds on save/load
* CSS and bootstrap collisions
* CSS and bootstrap stupidity
* Reinventing the entire multi-child / nested params / atomic creating/updating/deleting feature on my own before discovering Rails can do that for you.

Just.
I am so glad it's working.
I don't even feel relieved. I just feel exhausted.

But it's done.
finally.

and it's done well. It's all self-contained and reusable, it's easy to read, has separate styling and reusable partials, etc. It's a two line copy/paste drop-in for any other model that needs it. Two lines and it just works, and even tells you if you screwed up.

I'm incredibly proud of everything that went into this.
But mostly I'm just incredibly tired.

Time for some well-deserved sleep.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
I HAVE A TEST TOMORROW AT 8 AM AND I'VE BEEN TRYING TO SLEEP SINCE 12.30 AM. IT'S 6 AM ALREADY, 6 AM!

I guess when they no screens before sleeping they really mean it. I'm fucked, I'm really fucked. I guess I'll stare the ceiling until the alam goes off and accept an awful day and hope I get pumped up during the test or something. Fuck me. I want to fucking SLEEP. Fuck.

I just wanted to install vivaldi before sleeping and watch the last rick and morty episode. Does that fucking make me a fucking night owl? No. I could've use these precious time learning or writing code, or even sleeping, but fuck! I'm stuck here in time, just waiting for fucks sake!

Good night...
OR That's what I WOULD say if I could sleep...

Argh... Fuck you with a rusty pole while monkeys hanging on them. Why the fuck did you not take the extra five minutes that would have been taken to restrict that fucking datepicker to not allow users to pick a date before the current day??

Thanks to you asshole I've managed to book my accommodation from February 2nd to 4th instead of March.

Now I don't have anywhere to sleep while I must go there for the weekend because I have some course to attend to.

Abso-fucking-lutely great.

To become a programmer, you must at least once

1) sacrifice your weekend
2) sacrifice your sleep on the weekend
3) have an experience with non stop coding at least 3 days, working at home is an exception

this rule applies when you get a job working as a wageslave, rushing on a tight deadline

its almost 2 am here, and im at the office pushing and fixing bug codes for beta launch for tomorrow. this is all because of this one outsourcing company my boss hired that does the backend api keeps on changing and delaying stuff.

i guess im just fine with this, knowing that i have fulfilled all 3 rules before.

I recently started working with CI/CD in gitlab. I don't know why I had such a hard time getting it to work. I left it hanging for another day. Yesterday, before I went to sleep, I merged to master branch. On waking up I can't explain my happiness when I saw my pipeline... 😀

Time to go to bed.

Why not trying this lib ? it's not that late, let's give it a try for an hour and then --> sleep.

Woaw what, two hours passed already ? I was just still beginning to have fun ! so frustrating. Na, I could not sleep if I'm frustrated, let's dig deeper for 30min and then, go !

shit it's been an hour already, man, go to sleep now ! ...Actually it's too late already, better not sleeping and keep digging !

In the morning : can't wake up, tonight I promise, I go sleep at nine.

In the evening : oh new angular ! could worth a quick try before sleep !

Always get some sleep before running "rm -rf" (or anything really) in production

PS: sorry GL, couldn't resist, still love you ❤︎

Because I’m a fucking cowboy and a charlatan, and because I hate sleep and despise feeling refreshed and happy, I’m working pretty much full time as a contractor (I’m the full stack dev. I do everything) on a (well funded) startup alongside my day job.

Tonight I had to make some quick (lol “quick”) changes to a core piece of the platform.

Now before continuing please refer back to the first line of this rant.

So instead of writing new functionality, I copied and pasted another section.

I renamed all references of “new_order” to, cleverly “new_order2”.

I know.

I deploy to production...

My phone starts blowing up. In short, everything is fucked.

I’m going over the query, checking the production database. Why is this manifesting like this? It all looks correct.

2 HOURS of broken sales, pissed off customers, pissed off service agents and I see that there was still one reference of “new_order” that should have been “new_order2”.

I am a piece of shit.

Don’t work from exact place you eat everyday or sleep or entertain.

If you can’t focus set timer from 15 minutes to 1 hour and do something else that is not engaging your brain the same way your work does.

Go for a walk.
Take a break from electronic devices.
Take a shower.
Take a nap.
Take a dump.
Make a list of things todo before you eat.
Make groceries.
Clean your house a little.
Make a laundry.

Any manual labor helps if you need brain muscles for thinking.

So, today's comedy job story (and how depressive things become), and it's only 9:30.

Stressed PM assaults me at 8 to tell me what I have to do, standing next to me and dictacting stuff she wants done. Hate that.

As I went to a colleague to help her out with these fucking presentations (she "couldn't open them"), as I just arrived to her office my phone rings.

It's my PM. I'm 20m away, she calls me. Ok.

Me: "Yes?"
PM: "Hey Phlisg, erm, we are stuck in a conference room, can you come and open the door?"
Me: "Erm, the door has no handle, can't help"
PM: "Can you call the "housekeeper"?"
Me: "Sure" (why the hell doesn't she have his number...)

I go downstairs, go towards the conference room, and before the door there is the reception office. I ask the colleagues in there if the "housekeeper" is here, but they instead produced the handle from their drawers, and went to the door to open it.

At the same time, a person locked inside the conference room went through the window to go round and try to open the door.

Door successfully opened by colleague with handle.

I mean...

WHAT

THE

FUCK!

You have a problem? One reflex: call Phlisg. She might call me at 2 am in the morning because she cannot sleep or something.

Pissed!!

Pulled an all-nighter
Was too busy ans haven't had any time to eat anything next whole day.
35.5 hour sleep deprived, cameback home with takeouts

Let's pull the repo before i start eating.
Open the laptop and connect the charger while laying on bed.
*fell asleep and woke up 9 hours with laptop still running*

The worst part is that the problem i was trying to solve is still there.

Had an idea for an app. I started writing the prototype in Node since I just had a simple API in mind. Wanted to have some very basoc crud functionality going and then hook up a nice interface to it. It has to do with logistics and analytics so I just wanted to start sketching something small, and being that i have been successful in doing an API like this in the pass with node and mongo for a local company I said why not.

I have finished a good chunk of it. Gotta love that js productivity. But what tripped me out about it was:

Check how big the folder size is: 387mb

EXCUSE ME??!!

I tripped, there was no way in hell this shit was that heavy. I am basically using Koi(to give it a whirl instead of express, gotta start testing koi sometimes right?) And some joi with morgan and winston. That is it. I am using mongo since legit its the only one i know, even with that there really can't be that much right?

Check node_modules size.....10mb....wtf? What
Wait
Did it?

Sure as shit....forgot that i was storing the mongo data folder inside the app's root folder.

This would have been nothing if it would have taken me 30 seconds to figure it out.

I was losing my mind for 30 mins before i decided to properly verify

I need some sleep

"Before you sleep, think about your goals. You will get new ideas every morning."

Well, devRant has turned me from a bigot arse into quite the humble and decent person, and on top of that, introduced me to some new series (well more so the users than the platform, but you know what I mean).

Binge watched Silicon Valley (season one, I just started) and learnt about dick to floor ratio.

Prior to that binge watched Mr Robot. Cannot remember who suggested that, so I cannot attribute the appropriate gratitude to the appropriate person here.

Add to that that I no longer claim one language to be holy amongst others. Yeah. I was that dick before, we all have a bad side. I'm just admitting it.

I sat down and started utilising other languages, and even found quite a few that did what I wanted more efficiently. Plus I have gotten to meet some sharp people and broaden my own mind.

Fuck I hate my job, but I see a fucking brilliant future for myself thanks to coding and the open mind that I have attained. I attribute this to devRant (perhaps it was lying dormant, but you guys awoke it.).

Enough chitty chat, I'm off to sleep and then code my balls off.

Developers Poetry:
"Bed would be lovely, soft and deep,
but I’ve a deadline I must keep
and much to write before I sleep,
and much to write before I sleep."

When u disable automatic updates but windows updates anyways

Am I the only one around here that checks daily rants before going to sleep? O.o

Before learning the css grid, I fell asleep so fast everytime at night. After the bootcamp

This is the 3rd day and I still can’t sleep on time, my brain keeps on banging my eyes to wake up and try all of the websites that have been piled up on my brainbfor 3 years

P.S. I start learning grid after using bootstrap layout the first time. Not gonna touch it again. It breaks my brain kinda bad

!dev

I‘m not shitting you, a can of Guinness just fucking exploded in my bed room..

Last weekend i had a few drinks too much and I took a Guinness to my room to „watch a movie and fall asleep“. I fell asleep before even starting a movie. So I didn’t even open the can.

Today I was looking for a cable on my night table and accidentally hit the can with my elbow.
It just fell in the side and FUCKING EXPLODED. The can is split in half.
My whole bed, my good shoes, my mattress, the floor, my bills and EVERYTHING IN A RANGE OF 5 FUCKING METERS IS SOAKED.

How the fuck can that even happen?

Tried to clean everything with water and opened the windows to get my my shit dry again, but now I have to sleep on the couch in the living room until that stuff is try again..😤😤😤

Need a Guinness to calm down.

I know cans can „leak“ if it’s too hot but we had 19C max in the last week..

Happy weekend to you..

Today I experienced cruelty of C and mercy of Sublime and SublimeLinter.

So yesterday I was programming late at night for my uni homework in C. So I had this struct:

typedef struct {
int borrowed;
int user_id;
int book_id;
unsigned long long date;
} entry;

and I created an array of this entry like this:

entry *arr = (entry*) malloc (sizeof(arr) * n);

and my program compiled. But at the output, there was something strange...

There were some weird hexadecimal characters at the beginning but then there was normal output. So late at night, I thought that something is wrong with printf statement and I went googling... and after 2 hours I didn't found anything. In this 2 hours, I also tried to change scanf statement if maybe I was reading the wrong way. But nothing worked. But then I tried to type input in the console (before I was reading from a file and saving output in a file). And it outputted right answer!!! AT THAT POINT I WAS DONE!!! I SAID FUCK THIS SHIT I AM GOING TO SLEEP.

So this morning I continued to work on homework and tried on my other computer with other distro to see if there is the same problem. And it was..

So then I noticed that my sublime lint has some interesting warning in this line
entry *arr = (entry*) malloc (sizeof(arr) * n);
Before I thought that is just some random indentation or something but then I saw a message: Size of pointer 'arr' is used instead of its data.

AND IT STRUCT ME LIKE LIGHTNING.

I just changed this line to this:
entry *arr = (entry*) malloc (sizeof(entry) * n);

And It all worked fine. At that moment I was so happy and so angry at myself.

Lesson learned for next time: Don't program late at night especially in C and check SublimeLInter messages.

Thank goodness I put on my adulting cap and had a talk with my project manager today. He's such a kind and understanding person, truly underestimated qualities.

I'm basically a sub-contractor; a freelance consultant who get jobs from another company (ie my PM) and I messed up the estimate for this project we're working on and I did so in a rather spectacular manner.

60-80 estimated hours are now in the 300:s... I've missed more deadlines in this project alone than I have done in all my career (+10 years) combined. It's bad. It's a complete clusterfuck.

Problem is because of this never-ending project I haven't been able to work on things I can debit since May and I didn't have those margins. I'm fucked financially and I've been so stressed out about that I've literally been loosing sleep over it, found myself ugly-crying in the middle of the night more than once, worrying about how the fuck I'm gonna get on.

In my mind it was a real thing that they wouldn't want to keep working with me after this. Even though the failures in this project isn't _only_ on me, I'm not one to make excuses for myself and I would completely understand if that had been the outcome.

But it wasn't.

Instead he just said he was sorry he wouldn't be able to get all my hours billed by the client (of course not; we've left an estimate and by at least Swedish business law you can't deviate from those simply because you made an incorrect estimation).

But he has no intentions of letting me go as a consultant and assured me there will be other jobs (planned since before this whole ordeal). He's even going to try and get some hours in for me in other projects, small things here and there so I can get some billable hours quickly to help me out.

He knows me and he knows this isn't who I am as a professional. I'm so relieved I could god damn cry.

Normal people dream about shit before they go to sleep.

I, on the other hand, try to formulate a hypothesis that I'm already stuck on for 3 business days, thereby giving myself anxiety, henceforth failure to sleep.

I'm just perfect! 👌🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Worked for a friend of mine in the early 2000s. Had to implement a booking system into PHP for some private customer. This was PHP 4.something, the CMS was some alpha release of an open source project that my friend was sure was the future (it wasn't), and the specs were one A4 page of pencil scribbles that he took while talking to the customer.
Deadline was insane, nothing worked. I worked from getting up to laying down to get shit done, not being able to sleep, feeling stressed all the time. One week before roll-out I actually managed to get it running and we showed it to the customer. He was like "nope, that's not what I meant" and demanded lots of changes but accepted only one or two weeks of roll-out delay.
I did finish the job, made some good money, but then quit as soon as it was done.
This experience broke me so much that I worked in a workshop for 2 years to get away from programming as far as I possibly could.

Could not live anymore without SSD, I’m running vagrant up since 5pm and I believe that I’ll not sleep before 3am (again)...

I've been sitting and staring at my code for two hours.
Actual work done - nil
This has been going on since three days now.
Tying not to panic. It has happened before. This phase should end in the next couple of days....
Don't panic please.
I don't think I'll be able to sleep tonight...

Fucking hate it when the moment I sleep, the "spaceX is live" notification awakens me and after 15 minutes of waiting, that bitch says "the plan rescheduled for next week". Don't you really know your fucking rocket has problems 10 minutes before takeoff? really? shit, Now I have to read some idiot rants to sleep again. Fuck my life.

Building my own accounting software because everything else is overly complicated and is trying to compete with enterprise accounting tools. All I want is some budgeting, some bill tracking, and categorization.

Writing in Ruby because I'm a masochist. Using built-in minitest because again 😈.

I have currently around 62 assertions. As soon as I add ANY new test that's literally asserting true, everything comes unglued and 20+ failures pop up. Take it out, 62 passes.

I feel like I'm going crazy at this point. The errors also don't make ANY sense. Shit like, "that record doesn't exist" when it's clearly a part of fixtures and is only used in ONE test(the one that's breaking).

Installed minitest bisect, and it's like 🤷‍♀️"lol get fucked bro!"

So I came here to rant about this before my battery dies and I go drink myself to sleep.

Thank you for coming to my dev-talk.

The easiest way to win bet with me:

"I bet that you're not going to sleep before 10 o'clock"

!rant

TLDR; Lost passion after a few years, wasted a year, went on vacation without really any technology, found my passion and am excited as hell for 2019.

After programming for nearly 5 years, I’ve hit the point of not wanting to program anymore. I’ve burnt myself out, and haven’t had a vacation in 8+ years so we’ve finally decided to take one. I’m not going to say it’s a full blown vacation, but a semi-vacation since it’s with my parents also so I do have to do a few things I’d prefer not to such as meeting relatives.

I didn’t have the motivation to work on any new projects, finish any projects I actually enjoyed, I just did a few side projects for friends that took me anywhere from 5 minutes to 30 minutes every few weeks. In general this year has been garbage in development terms, I’ve lost passion. It felt like a chore, I didn’t find the entertainment I once did.

I’ve been away from technology for about 2 weeks now, and have less than a week left before I fly back and I’m excited as hell. During this break away from technology (with the exception of browsing devRant once in a while), has me excited to work on many projects and actually start learning and improving my skills. I’ve actually gained the motivation to work on 2 projects that have been planned for nearly 2 years now, I’ve noted down ideas for them, made diagrams, etc, just never had the passion to develop them. 2019 is going to be one hell of a year, since I get back almost at the end of November, and December I have a few business meetings and University exams that I have to prepare for. Excited to see these projects through, one is going to be for the hell of it, just been a passion project I’ve wanted to do for years now. The other project is actually a project for one of my sub-companies that hasn’t officially released since I didn’t have the passion to work on it. (Not going to go into full detail yet about the companies/projects, going to save that for the future)

Alongside that, I’m excited since my main company that is totally unrelated to technology, is set to do some massive moves during 2019 also. Looking forward to that, and being able to launch my dream company (the sub-company I mentioned before).

Time for sleep now, goodnight! (Wrote this after a few drinks and in the middle of the night, hopefully it’s not full blown garbage)

Learned a new word here in devRant: sleep code.

Code that's is written where you hardly can get an eye open.

Crazy shit 😵

Edit: Yeah, I count sleep code as one word (or phrase if this will satisfy you before commenting)

8 hours sleep aren't fucking enough if you slept less then 8h days before

Me, about to head out for work: Hey I wonder how much time I have left before the train departs

Clock: 02:00

Me: fuck I did it again

Waking up thinking it's time to start the day and then figure out you can still sleep for 4 hours, while having already showered, put clothes on, eaten breakfast

Happens Every. FUCKIN. Vacations.

Before Vacations: Gonna finish every course out there related to XYZ
During Vacations: Let's play FIFA and ... Sleep

// Fist Rant :S

When you go to sleep late the day before studying hard for the exam of graph theory and when you see the test equally not know how to answer any question :(

Stress made me fall into old habits of instead of saying stop and letting my team now that I was falling apart (not realising it myself even) I just kept saying "Yes, I fix that." to every single request that was made in the project.

The closer we got to the deadline, the more I hyperfocused and ignored the signs. I just kept working. The last two days I didn't even sleep.

Of course the launch botched. I finally broke down and both my mind and my body have given up, since yesterday I'm in a mental feedback loop causing continuous anxiety attacks and migraines. I literally CAN'T do anything but trying to not go back into fight- or flight mode and remember to breathe.

I FINALLY made my project manager aware (something I should have done days ago) that I am incapacitated and now I am waiting for medication (Oxazepam) to be picked up at the pharmacy by my husband.

I almost literally worked myself into the ground.

I've been here before. Never again.

This is what happens if you don't listen to your mind and body and put up a white flag in time.

me: *Tries a little change before going to sleep*

git: error: invalid object xyz

me: sure, fuck you too

Decided to spend my weekend on a little side project that I thought I could finish quickly.

Not only does my code not work, but what I wrote is so horrible that I'm honestly ashamed. Its like the despicable porn that you sometimes end up watching and the horror of realizing what the hell you just watched after you finish - I thought my code was good, but really, it was trash.

Before I started writing I though to myself, "I'll finish this project and then I'll upload it to my Github to expand my repository", but now I cringe at the thought of someone else reviewing this pile of shit I call my code.

It's 2 am here in Israel. I know I should go to sleep, but I'll just stare at the ceiling, feeling unproductive because everything I did today is literally worthless.

How the fuck do I justify this shit to myself? Calling this a "learning experience" feels like a fucking joke.

Honestly, I don't know why I chose Python to do OOP when Kotlin would have served me much better.

But, there's always tomorrow, isn't there?

Thanks stupid workmates who fuck up the project first and then 4 hours before the deadline tell you without any feelings "it's late, I'm going to sleep".

NO FUCK YOU GET YOUR ASS HERE AND START HELPING ME

It's rant time!

So, as a broke electrical engineering student, I got this job in a local company. They used JSF and my skills in java were, at the very least, small (former PHP developer). But as a self taught developer this didn't stopped me and I went full on java learning (very bad year for my EE studies).

I became the 'guy in charge' for several of their projects (yeah, they did exploited broke students, I realized this far too late). I was very proud of myself, I worked hard, showed my true value, and they became impressed.

One nice thursday night, my "handler" emailed me with a urgent request. They needed an entire jsf application done by monday and the requirements were fairly complex.

Oh boy, I had a total of 10h of sleep from thursday to monday. I didn't even slept before going to my monday class, but I delivered the system. Got an pat in the back... "you're awesome"... I was happy.

6 months later: I received an email asking to fix a bug in the system. No problem with that. Oddly, this bug was a MAJOR bug. There's no way the system worked properly for six months with it. I fixed it in no time and commited the changes.

Turns out that this was the first time the system was going to be deployed. They made me go in an insane weekend dev project, and didn't even used the system for SIX MONTHS!!! I started to work my way out the company after this, aiming to open my own software company.

I still remember some other rants from the time I worked there. But these are for later.

Nice week for you all, may the sprint go gently and the clients be kind.

That feeling when you think the elevator is out of service because it won't go down
Turn out I was pushing the floor button I was on.
I literally stayed 7 minutes at the same floor before realising.
Sleep deprivation makes me dumb.

Dam wandows... My system is up to date almost all the time as I install those forced updates before they are actually forced, just so I can be in control of saving things and not losing anything valuable during a forced restart. I've updated literally last evening and made sure the day is done only after all the updates have been made. Today I was working on a personal project and made an hour break for lunch and some rest. My computer went to sleep as it usually does when I leave it for 10 minutes or so... Or so I thought. After my break I sat behind the damn computer to get back to work only to realize that I woke it up to wrong system (windows is secondary as I only use it for this single project that needs to be done in .net and UWP) and there's no work to get back to. It just made an update without even letting me know there is one to be made.
I swear, if the person who made this design choice have paid only 1% of all the lost works' worth, they would smash the thing on day one and went bankrupt in first 2hrs of that 'feature' living it's life. And people wonder I daily drive *NIX based system...

Sleep before 1 AM

dev/ChoosingBeggars

Condition : Deadlines in 7 Hours. Submit on Class

MyClassmate : "Have you done the last Assignment?"
Me : "Technically Speaking, yes, i've done that in Python, since we need to use C, i need to Translate it first"
MC : "Can you teach me?"
Me : "I wouldn't say i won't, but it's 1 AM, time is short, need to sleep, I can give you the python code tho"
MC : "wait, so you will submit the python code without Translating it first?"
Me : "Of course not, i can translate it less than 30 minutes, i'll finish and submit it before class"
MC : "can you translate it now, so you can email that to me at <his email address>, so i can sleep now and we can submit it together this morning"
Me : "i can't tell you are serious or not, anyway, see you in class"

🤦‍♂🤦‍♂🤦‍♂🤦‍♂🤦‍♂ <screenshot in indonesian, just for proofs>

Why do I always think of the best way to fix a bug right before I sleep?

Tried getting enough sleep for the Monday and failed miserably.
First, I made my kids washed, like usual, around 6pm. Then tried to put them to sleep. The younger one went to sleep, the older refused. Wanted to play, run, jump, sing and scream. After an half an hour his screaming woke up younger. Now I had two kids to put to sleep back again.
The younger is one year old and requires more attention, otherwise cries.
After serious fight the older was forced to sleep. He tried to jump over me, bite me, kick, hit, eat chocolate, wanted to pee, then jump, run and fight again. I ended up lying him forcibly in the bed, holding his hand by kind of a block, so that he couldn't move to much. Took 15 minutes, but he felt asleep. It was 22. Joys of having 3yo kid.
After more 30 minutes and a bottle of milk the 1yo was sleeping.
At 2am the older woke and cried. I woke, tried to make him calm, he pushed me away and went back to sleep. Now it's 3:40, my sleeping pill wore off, and I won't take another one, because I need to get up at six.

This is how you get a good night's sleep before having a busy week.

Updating firebase right before deploy... cost me 2 nights of no sleep.

Not at all dev related but I don’t have a social life so I share with you guys:)

I’ve been fat for all my life. You might say it’s my own fault blah blah but I quit sugar over 10 years ago, I don’t snack and eat 1-2 meals a day, not much more than others do.

The first time I was in good shape was when I was 16. I was growing, I started boxing and I was happy-ish with my body for the first time. I got down from 110kgs to ~87kgs, which is a good weight for me, I have heavy bones and wide shoulders I guess.
I insured my shoulder and couldn’t do boxing anymore but my weight was still pretty much stable. After working in the office for a few months I started gaining weight again, I think mainly due to the stress and lack of sleep.
In 2017 for the first time I hit a new high with 120kgs. I quit my terrible, stressful 24/7 job and relocated and got down to ~115 which I maintained for quite a while (still going to the gym and stuff).

And then the lockdown started..
I went up to >120 in no time.
(Sounds really bad but as mentioned, I’m heavy anyway so I’m not THAT obese, just fat.

Seeing my weight was really scary to me so I started a keto diet again, which I did before but with limited success.

Warning: Controversial topic coming up..

I took it a bit further and tried 0-carb (carnivore diet) instead of low carb and I lost 6kg within a month. Then the next plateau at 114, then at 112 etc.
Went more strict and removed seasoning and stuff and started eating more nutritious meat, liver, heart, tongue etc and my weight started dripping again.

Yesterday for the first time in ~a decade I got down to 105kg.
My end goal is 90, so I made it half way through.

Just really happy to have achieved this. The 1 good thing about lockdown I guess, I had so much time to be on my own.

Before you say eating no greens is bad, keep in mind that most not old people die because of obesity, not because of a lack of fiber.

It’s a big achievement for me and I hope that I can get to 90kg in another 3 months..

Story over

I pray to the Elders of the Internet every night, before I go to sleep.

Was having a Good day , My code was compiling, Android Studio did find the fucking 'R' In his goddamn libraries and eventually got my strong coffee by my desk.
Suddenly i'm hit up with one of Noob friends saying that he installed Windows on His MacBook Air...
My ears and eyes starting bleeding and all that came in my mind was why the heck did you do this, why the heck did you coat your Chocolate truffle with the fucking Mud. Why didn't you just hammered the keyboard and the screen before doing . I had to sleep after this and all that i saw in my dreams was fucking apples and windows.
Please for God's sake don't do this , wouldn't be a sin more deep than this one

! rant

Sorry but I'm really, really angry about this.

I'm an undergrad student in the United States at a small state college. My CS department is kinda small but most of the professors are very passionate about not only CS but education and being caring mentors. All except for one.

Dr. John (fake name, of course) did not study in the US. Most professors in my department didn't. But this man is a complete and utter a****le. His first semester teaching was my first semester at the school. I knew more about basic programming than he did. There were more than one occasion where I went "prof, I was taught that x was actually x because x. Is that wrong?" knowing that what I was posing was actually the right answer. Googled to verify first. He said that my old teachings were all wrong and that everything he said was the correct information. I called BS on that, waited until after class to be polite, and showed him that I was actually correct. Denied it.

His accent was also really problematic. I'm not one of those people who feel that a good teacher needs a native accent by any standard (literally only 1 prof in the whole department doesn't), but his English was *awful*. He couldn't lecture for his life and me, a straight A student in high school, was almost bored to sleep on more than one occasion. Several others actually did fall asleep. This... wasn't a good first impression.

It got worse. Much, much worse.

I got away with not having John for another semester before the bees were buzzing again. Operating systems was the second most poorly taught class I've ever been in. Dr John hadn't gotten any better. He'd gotten worse. In my first semester he was still receptive when you asked for help, was polite about explaining things, and was generally a decent guy. This didn't last. In operating systems, his replies to people asking for help became slightly more hostile. He wouldn't answer questions with much useful information and started saying "it's in chapter x of the textbook, go take a look". I mean, sure, I can read the textbook again and many of us did, but the textbook became a default answer to everything. Sometimes it wasn't worth asking. His homework assignments because more and more confusing, irrelavent to the course material, or just downright strange. We weren't allowed to use muxes. Only semaphores? It just didn't make much sense since we didn't need multiple threads in a critical zone at any time. Lastly for that class, the lectures were absolutely useless. I understood the material more if I didn't pay attention at all and taught myself what I needed to know. Usually the class was nothing more than doing other coursework, and I wasn't alone on this. It was the general consensus. I was so happy to be done with prof John.

Until AI was listed as taught by "staff", I rolled the dice, and it came up snake eyes.

AI was the worst course I've ever been in. Our first project was converting old python 2 code to 3 and replicating the solution the professor wanted. I, no matter how much debugging I did, could never get his answer. Thankfully, he had been lazy and just grabbed some code off stack overflow from an old commit, the output and test data from the repo, and said it was an assignment. Me, being the sneaky piece of garbage I am, knew that py2to3 was a thing, and used that for most of the conversion. Then the edits we needed to make came into play for the assignment, but it wasn't all that bad. Just some CSP and backtracking. Until I couldn't replicate the answer at all. I tried over and over and *over*, trying to figure out what I was doing wrong and could find Nothing. Eventually I smartened up, found the source on github, and copy pasted the solution. And... it matched mine? Now I was seriously confused, so I ran the test data on the official solution code from github. Well what do you know? My solution is right.

So now what? Well I went on a scavenger hunt to determine why. Turns out it was a shift in the way streaming happens for some data structures in py2 vs py3, and he never tested the code. He refused to accept my answer, so I made a lovely document proving I was right using the repo. Got a 100. lol.

Lectures were just plain useless. He asked us to solve multivar calculus problems that no one had seen and of course no one did it. He wasted 2 months on MDP. I'd continue but I'm running out of characters.

And now for the kicker. He becomes an a**hole, telling my friends doing research that they are terrible programmers, will never get anywhere doing this, etc. People were *crying* and the guy kept hammering the nail deeper for code that was honestly very good because "his was better". He treats women like delicate objects and its disgusting. YOU MADE MY FRIEND CRY, GAVE HER A BOX OF TISSUES, AND THEN JUST CONTINUED.

Want to know why we have issues with women in CS? People like this a****le. Don't be prof John. Encourage, inspire, and don't suck. I hope he's fired for discrimination.

End of Hackathon. Students and faculty voted on applications. My group got student voted best overall. Now to sleep for the first time since before Hackathon. So tired, my brain’s literally got “background Zoom meeting sounds” - typing, soft cursing under breath, etc) on loop. I haven’t been in a Zoom in hours.

I moved about a month ago, the new place has crap curtains (yay for renting 😔) so I was waking up at 5-6am as the sun comes up 😞.

I bought blinds a couple of weeks ago, they've just arrived and all screwed on. I was waking up and getting bored so I started going out running before work. My last job I was the absolute last one in the building every day, yet also the closest. Now, with the running I'm getting in at about the same time but one of the first in my new job.

My new blinds are remote controlled/programmable. It's a bit sad but totally worth it, I'll be able to sleep in, have sunlight waking me up and still get to work at a sensible time, kinda just gives me more time in the day! 😁

That late night sunday before sleep feeling, when your are almost eager to know what crap the next day is going to bring you.

i dreamed a parallel reality

not even fking joking rn

it was MORE REAL THAN THE REALITY WE LIVE HERE

IT WAS LITERALLY LIKE I FKING LIVED IN ANOTHER REALM

this has never happened to me before ever

this shit woke me up at about 4:30 AM and i couldnt sleep for the rest of the fking day

i slept for 1h 30min

after i woke up it took me a couple of minutes to figure out if that realm was the base reality or if this current realm the reality we live in is the real base reality....

i wass fuckjgm lost !

there were 2 identical scenes that happened to me in the first and second realm

but both scenes had a different outcome, the realm i was in the dream had such a good outcome that it felt too good to be real BECAUSE I FKING DREAMED OF EXPERIENCING THAT I ACHIEVED HALF OF MY DREAM, WITHIN THE DREAM

And when i woke up and realized i returned back to this fucking realm i was so goddamn disappointed that i just wanted to go back to fkig sleep and just.. die

what the fuck

my brain is overwhelmed with bullshit and lies so much that i can not distinguish what is fake and what is real

fuck, eeverything in this existence

Holy fucking shit... this didnt happen! IT FUCKING CAMT HAVE! NO NO NO NO! IMPOSSIBLE!
I LOST MY FUCKING BAG! RIGHT BEFORE ONE OF MY MOST IMPORTANT FUCKING TESTS! Ok, a little backstory, everyone in Switzerland or (due to alice's request) german can skip this part:
Here we have something called a "Lehre" (I think its called an apprenticeship or sth?) which usually goes 3-4 years, and in the middle, (end of 2nd) we have a "Teilprüfung" Which is basically a test which you HAVE to pass, if you dont, wait another year, and do it with the Final exams... and if you dont pass, your fucked. very very deep in the ass. And guess where I am? Yes. end of 2nd year. And guess what happened?
I LOST ALL OF MY STUFF! GONE. LOST. IM SO FUCKING SCREWED RIGHT NOW! (I have a small backup tho) BUT THIS IS JUST BAD! VERY FUCKING BAD!
OH GOD...
WHY THE FUCK ISNT THIS A DREAM!
I cant sleep...

send help.

fucking srsly.

send help.

I was cleaning up my hard drive and deleted some old directories.
I was notified that my backup just started and wanted to look how far along it was.
However, instead of 'ls -l /mnt/DATA/Backup' my shitpile of muscle memory typed 'rm -rf /mnt/DATA/Backup'... That's when my harddrive suddenly had 750GB of free space and I decided that I probably need some sleep.

Before any of y'all wanna lecture me on off-site backups, funny thing: Today I implemented a new daily backup routine (praised be borg) and therefore deleted my somewhat chaotic Backups on my NAS "Because if shit hits the fan, I still have my local Backup"

Okay, I knew one of my colleagues was actually a work freak, but to this point...

He's been working for most of the day yesterday on a school project, and so was I. Satisfied with my progress, I push the code with TODOs on things we had to agree on tomorrow as well as mentioning it in the issue associated with it on Git, with my last commit a bit before 11PM.

I wake up, with a ping on Discord asking me what was that "bug" I just pushed, wondering what editor I use and asking me if I even use the console debugger. Said "bug" was the point of discussion I said we wanted to talk about tomorrow, I replied in the morning. But he decided of the fix on his own and committed it, as well as other things until... 3AM...

Honestly, I don't blame him for choosing at our stead, he's the leader of our branch and the Gitmaster on top of that. I just reproach him to call it a bug, not see the issue, and all that while he could, you know, sleep. And get some rest overall.
This dude has been working himself madly these last weeks, where he did about 80% of what each of the team member was supposed to do in a whole semester (which amounts to 150 hours of work) for this project (we're nine folks on it).
Now I'm pretty sure it's how he works and that he still gets a decent amount of sleep (like I dunno, until 9AM or so), so I don't expect a response beforehand.

And indeed, as he woke up, he replied to me.

At 7:50AM.

I can't sleep whenever I remember ,few year before I paid $25 for ethical hacking workshop and they show us inspect element n SQL map

Should I be excited or concerned?

Newbie dev(babydev) who just learned string vs int and the word "boolean", is SUPER into data parsing, extrapolation and recursion... without knowing what any of those terms.

2 ½ hrs later. still nothing... assuming he was confused, I set up a 'quick' call...near 3 hrs later I think he got that it was only meant so I could see if/where he didnt understand... not dive into building extensive data arch... hopefully.

So, we need some basic af PHP forms for some public-provided input into a mySQL db. I figured I'd have him look up mySQL variables/fields, teach him a bit about proper db/field setup and give him something to practice on his currently untouched linux container I just set up so he could have a static ipv4 and cli on our new block (yea... he's spoiled, but has no clue).

I asked him to list some traits of X that he thinks could be relevant. Then to essentially briefly explain the logic to deciding/returning the values/how to store in the db... essentially basic conditionals and for loops... which is also quite new to him.

I love databases; I know I'm not in the majority... I assumed he'd get a couple traits in his mind and exhaust himself breaking them down. I was wrong. He was/likely is in his sleep now, over complicating something that was just meant as a basic af.

Fyi, the company is currently weighted towards more autistics (him and myself included) than neurotypicals.

I know I was(still am) extremely abnormal, especially when it comes to things like data.

So, should I be concerned/have him focus elsewhere for a bit?... I dont want to have him burnout before he even gets to installing mySQL

18pm: *starting to work on own project. Listening to classical music for better concentration*
22pm: *no progress*
22:10pm: *putting on some good old death core on max volume coz fuck it.*
22:30pm: *realizing I did more in the past 20mins than in the 4h before*
22:45pm: *super motivated*
2am: *same song again? Quick look on the clock...* "fuuuuuu" *apparently listened to my whole playlist. OK. Let's search for more stuff on my 2TB HDD I dedicated to death core etc*
4am: "lul" *go to sleep*
6am: *wake up, go to school"
*goto 18pm*

What a difference being in the right frame of mind makes.

On Monday I had an interview for a role that I was really keen on, I'd completed a codility test before which I had killed, everything seemed in place. Then I didn't sleep well, had an urgent fire fighting call with my current employer 15 minutes before the interview, I just couldn't focus, I stumbled on some very basic questions, the whole process was torturous.

Today I had an interview for a different, but equally attractive, role. What a difference, I was focused, my answers were clear and thought out, the technical questions were fine, I killed it I think. Pma definitely makes a big difference.

29 hours straight. From a thursday morning at 8 to friday around lunch at 13. No sleep at all.

A coworker became a dad a week before, so now I had to complete his data migration project. Had not been involved in the project at any point until his son was born.

But I made it and got a bonus in the end👍🏻

I'm too addicted and used to coffee...Like I can literally drink it right before going to sleep and I'll get a pretty good one. How bad is this? :|

That hangover you get after working on a personal project all night long, having less than an hour of sleep before your actual work day begins..

my day went to shit immediately... long night, got to sleep at 4AM, poked awake at 8AM, "hey wake up we gotta go to a town 200 miles away, dress like you're rich, we gotta go find a place to live for my new job" ugh, fine, got another 30 minutes or so of sleep in the car. We get there, the guy shows us a place that I physically can't fully stand up in and is like 600-some square feet for $750/month. Fuck that. We get halfway back home, "hey i forgot, we just finished renovating a new unit, come look!" goddammit gotta go BACK to the city... get there, it's a 2-floor 1200 square foot place for $675, a hell of a lot better. We leave to go see relatives in town, get a call, "hey hurry home your grandfather's hallucinating" we get there before an ambulance (we traveled 120 miles in less time than an ambulance took to drive 50 miles...) and my grandfather's hauled (by us, as the ambulance refuses to take him to the right hospital, they want to take him OUT OF STATE in an ambulance and he's not actively dying) to the VA in the city we were just in... he's immediately screened and his dementia has progressed to the point he needs to be in a nursing home in 12 hours somehow. I have no idea either. Anyways, we're about 3/4 of the way back home and it's now 2:40AM. My dad's been driving for 18 hours pretty much straight. I'm still awake, he's wired (the worst possible state to be in while driving) and family drama has happened as family members are already trying to take the land my grandpa lived on AND HE'S LITERALLY ONLY BEEN GONE FOR 6 HOURS.

so how was your day?

Used a starter to scaffold a new project. Have never used that starter before but it has more than 1400 starts on Github.

Two days after.... so far so good. The created project structure used some tools I haven't used before, some are good, others are not so good, but anyway I am towards the first release of my codes. I have done countless 'npm run build', 'npm run test', 'npm run fix', etc., but.... my fault, I haven't committed once since starting the project, thinking I would commit when the next function is implemented, next test case passed.... after all, what could go wrong anyway?

Finally, one last test case passed, I think I will commit and run 'npm publish'.... but wait, had a glimpse of the scripts section in package.json, there's a command named 'all'. An voice came out of nowhere was talking to my subconscious mind, "all.... build, lint, prettier, test..... yeah you should run all... it's another build script, the worst you can get is just some harmless error messages.....", and my fingers typed 'npm run all'...

Time stopped for a few seconds, file structure in project explorer was shifting, files & folders were disappearing & appearing, what's happening... and I looked at the 'all' script closely for the first time....

WHAT THE HELL, WHO SHOULD PUT 'git reset --hard' IN A BUILD SCRIPT WITHOUT ANY PROMPT????!!!!!!!

MY PLAN WAS TO COMMIT AND GO TO SLEEP, IT'S 1AM NOW!!! WHERE CAN I RECOVER THE LOST FILES????

My friend confused between truncate and append. He opened a file in w+ mode in python. So to solve the issue he called me at midnight disturbing my sleep. So now onwards before going to sleep I always put my phone on flight mode.

Basically everything. Let me explain.

It's now.. okay what time is it? Ooh there's some dust on the clock, I wonder how do they form.. I guess I'll check Wikipedia. Page is loading, might as well scroll fb while waiting. Ooh a video on the home feed! Oh wait it's loading, I wonder what's on YouTube. Ugh, ads, let's just mute it and scroll devRant. Oh cool there's something called Google FooBar challenge, imma try searching Arraylist Java. Nice, lv1 done, let's take a break by getting a drink from the fridge.

*Walks back to room after drinking a sip of orange juice* hmm.. what time is it? Oh it's late, imma go to sleep!

*Shuts down everything and goes to bed* Maybe I'll just browse devRant before sleeping.. Ooh I have an idea for wk51!

Multiple all-nighters (all day every day):

1) Working, studying and developing an Android game as pet project. Last few weeks before release (yup, I've set a deadline for a pet project) my day consisted of uni, work, more work and 4-5h sleep.

2) Having worked on my thesis (Development of a CPU/SoC + Firmware + Linux kernel) and actual paid work. In parallel. Because, you know, I need to eat and pay rent and shit while I'm writing the thesis. And debts at that moment were not an option (still made some). All-day all-night all-week. After submitting the thesis I went to the doc and enjoyed 2 weeks of doing nothing.

3) Sometimes on my main open-source project after regular work hours. If I have the motivation and ideas that I want to check out or prove it gets late/early too fast.

Can't sleep at least before midnight but..

Also can barely stay awake during the day

after staring my stupid code for 10 mins, the facepalm. Better even before this my program went into infinite loop cause i had initialized a counter and if(counter<10) WITHOUT INCREMENTING IT. Its 1 am i should sleep.

Ugggg!

I am about fed up with Windows.

I leave app/programs open at night because I have a bad memory, and they were important to what I was doing.

I wake up: Windows Login Screen. Apparentally windows decided to restart my computer during the night.

Ohh what joy.~

Now I have to rememeber what the fuck I had open - and it was mostly work related.

I would have left for Linux ages ago, but I'm a gamer.. And most of my games are for windows.. Some are even Windows Store Apps..

Windows.. Why don't you give a shit about us..

And before you ask..
I have Auto Updates Disabled (Not that that really fucking matters with windows..)
I have all sleep and power saver settings disabled.

Personal update:
So i have been to psychiatrist few days ago. I got a prescription for anti depression drugs and today is the 4th day of my therapy. I feel a bit better. At least i can sleep can focus on things. Unfourtanetly mentaly i dont feel better. That rant that i wrote before didnt help me neither (i deleted it). That drug that im taking has a shit ton of possible side effects uncluding anger. My massive untrust to people dosent help neither.

To anybody who didnt read the previous rant. I have meet a classmate that had a idea for a android app. I have fought he is one of that bad, stupid kind. I was wrong i said bad things to him but eventualy i helped him by showing where he can get help with the app.

I shouldnt have responded to him in the first place. Now i feel bad. I have no idea how you are going to respond im scared. I prejudged him but im now sorry. I have no idea how my life is going to go.

I also have tried applying for a awesome C# internship, perfect for a student: paid and might get experience in C#. I have send them 2 emails on the address that they gave me during open days (where i had talked with HR and devs personaly about their job) and i got no responce since last month...

Finals for the first semester are closing in as well. I dont know if im going to pass or not. And that is the worst thing i have to worry about now.

It is the time for the proper long personal rant.

Im a fresh student, i started few months ago and the life is going as predicted: badly or even worse...
Before the university i had similar problems but i had them under control (i was able to cope with them and with some dose of "luck" i graduated from high school and managed to get into uni). I thought by leaving the town and starting over i would change myself and give myself a boost to keep going. But things turned out as expected. Currently i waste time everyday playing pc games or if im too stressed to play, i watch yt videos. Few years ago i thought i was addicted, im not. It might be a effect of something greater. I have plans, for countess inventions, projects, personal, for university and others and ALL of them are frozen, stopped, non existant. No motivation. I had few moments when i was motivated but it was short, hours or only minutes. Long term goals dont give me any motivation. They give as much short lived joy, happines as goals in games and other things... (no substance abuse problems, dont worry). I just dont see point of my projects anymore. Im sure that my projects are the only thing that will give me experience and teach me something but... i passed the magic barrier of univercity, all my projects are becoming less and less impressive... TV and other sources show people, briliant people, students, even children that were more succesful than me

if they are better than me why do i even bother? companies care more for them, especialy the prestigious ones, they have all the fame, money, funding, help, gear without question!
of course they hardworked for ther positions, they could had better beggining or worse but only hard work matters right?

As i said. None of my work matters, i worked hard for my whole life, studing, crafting, understanding: programming, multiple launguages, enviorements, proper and most effcient algorithms, electronic circuits, mechanical contraptions. I have knowlege about nearly every machine and i would be able to create nearly everything with just access to those tools and few days worth of practice. (im sort of omnibus, know everything) But because had lived in a small town i didnt have any chances of getting the right equpment. All of my electronical projects are crap. Mechanical projects are made out of scrap. Even when i was in high school, nobody was impressed or if they were they couldnt help me.
Now im at university. My projects are stagnant, mostly because of my mental problems. Even my lifestyle took a big hit. I neglect a lot of things i shouldnt. Of course greg, you should go out with friends! You cant dedicate 100% of your life to science!
I fucking tried. All of them are busy or there are other things that prevent that... So no friends for me. I even tried doing something togheter! Nope, same reasons or in most cases they dont even do anything...
Science clubs? Mostly formal, nobody has time, tools are limited unless you designed you thing before... (i want to learn!, i dont have time to design!), and in addition to that i have to make a recrutment project... => lack of motivation to do shit.

The biggest obstacle is money. Parts require money, you can make your parts but tools are money too. I have enough to live in decent apartment and cook decently as well but not enough to buy shit for projects. (some of them require a lot or knowlege... and nobody is willing to give me the second thing). Ok i found a decent job oppurtunity. C# corporation, very nice location, perfect for me because i have a lot of time, not only i can practice but i can earn for stuff. I have a CV or resume just waiting for my friend to give me the email (long story, we have been to that corp because they had open days and only he has the email to the guy, just a easier way)
But there are issiues with it as well so it is not that easy.

If nobody have noticed im dedicated to the science. Basicly 100% scientist that want to make a world a better place.

I messaged a uni specialist so i hope he will be able to help me.
For long time i have thought that i was normal, parent were neglecting my mental health and i had some situations that didnt have good infuence on me as well. I might have some issiues with my brain as well, 96% of aspargers symptoms match, with other links included. I dont want to say i have it but it is a exciuse for a test. In addition to that i cant CANT stop thinking, i even tried not thinking for few minutes, nope i had to think about something everytime. On top of that my biological timer is flipped. I go to sleep at 5 am and wake up at 5pm (when i dont have lectures).
I prefer working at night, at that time my brain at least works normaly but i dont want to disrupt roommates...
And at the day my brain starts the usual, depression, lack of motivation, other bullshit thing.

I might add something later, that is all for now.

Hi all,

This might be a long post so bear with me. I work for a company and there was a project for a huge client. I'm junior in skill (been programming for about two years) but my job title doesn't reflect that. Anyways, I got the design about a month ago but I was on deadline for two other projects so I couldn't pick it up until last week Wed. Ironically, that's when the final design was delivered & told me it was due next week Wednesday. I built it as fast as I could. Finished mobile but for some reason, this last part for desktop just wasn't working out and it just so happens to be the most crucial part of the piece. (I was also sick the entire time and didn't sleep for the last two days nor did I eat). I was supposed to demo it yesterday but I still needed to make a few updates and the project coordinator took me off the project & gave it to a dev with more experience. This has never happened to me before. I'd go as far as to say this is my first big fuck up. I've always delivered on deadline and I'm taking this pretty hard. Has anyone been in similar situations? What do I do? Any advice?

Damnnn, have u ever found the solution to problem while u were sleeping cause i found the way how to fixed a bug in my dream maybe cause i was thinking about it before i went to sleep but its really weird when i think about it. 😬🤯

We were a small startup with only 5-6 developers. I had to design the UI and develop most of the Android frontend, It was quite an easy and fun job for me because I don't get to see people rant about the design that needed to be implemented so, usually I design something that can be easily implemented.
We got 2 projects with a tight deadline and I took care of both project's design part and after completing the design I took the entire frontend of one project and rest of em started working with the other one. Usually we were a strong team and was able to deliver things real quick because we were expert in our intrested fields, I had a fast start in my project where the other project lagged a lot because of the desifn which was hard to implement by them, and the frontend was bo where near to get completed by the deadline and I couldn't help them out because it was all messed up shit handling both projects together.

Finally we were in a situation where none of our project are ready and the deadline was about to hit within a week, so we halted the other project and asked them to join me to complete the project am Working on, I had built most of the Android part and these fellows had a hard time figuring out stuff I made up (yeah, documentation was shit while you go agile), and finally things messed up and I had to work 2 continuous day and night without any sleep just to get the app ready 10 minutes before the official proto presentation.

The best part is I couldn't even get up from my chair and had a headache, fainted instantly when I took a few steps, but the product launch went good.

We fucked uo the code and both the projects just because we weren't available for each other considering the size of the team. Anyway we completed the project but It was a huge failure for us being first time to manage a startup.

Learned a lot of lessons,
Always make a team with people who are good at each of the aspect of development and never divide it to get shit done faster.

Welp, this made my night and sorta ruined my night at the same time.

He decided to work on a new gaming community but has limited programming knowledge, but has enough to patch and repair minor issues. He's waiting for an old friend of his to come back to start helping him again, so this leads to me. He needed a custom backend made for his server, which required pulling data from an SQL/API and syncing with the server, and he was falling behind pace and asked for my help. He's a good friend that I've known for a while, and I knew it wouldn't take to long to create this, so I decided to help him. Which lead to an interesting find, and sorta made my night.

It wasn't really difficult, got it done within an hour, took some time to test and fix any bugs with his SQL database. But this is where it get's interesting, at least for me. He had roughly a few hundred people that did beta testing of the server, anyways, once the new backend was hooked in and working, I realized that the other developer he works with had created a 'custom' script to make sure there are no leaks of the database. Well, that 'custom' script actually begins wiping rows/tables (Depends on the sub-table, some get wiped row by row, some just get completely dropped), I just couldn't comprehend what had happened, as rows/tables just slowly started disappearing. It took me a while of checking, before checking his SQL query logs (At least the custom script did that properly and logged every query), to realize it just basically wiped the database.

Welp, after that, it began to restrict the API I was using, and due to this it identified the server as foreign access (Since it wasn't using the same key as his plugin, even though I had an API key created just so it could only access ranks and such, to prevent abuse) and begin responding not with denied, but with a lovely "Fuck you hacker!" This really made my night, I don't know why, but I was genuinely laughing pretty hard at this response.

God, I love his developer. Luckily, I had created a backup earlier, so I patched it and just worked around the plugin/API to get it working. (Hopefully, it's not a clusterfuck to read, writing this at 2 am with less than an hour of sleep, bedtime! Goodnight everyone.)

I have a strict rule about putting my computer away by 7pm.

I've found that if I get started on something, no matter how stupid it is, I will stay up all night working on something. If I try to quit, I go to bed and can't sleep because I'm still thinking about it.

Setting a time gives my brain time to let go before it's time to go to bed.

In the grim dark future cryosleep or hypersleep or something similar will probably be used to extend peoples lives (and thus politicians careers) before it is ever used for space travel.

Give it time and you'll eventually have, through repeated extensions, term limits of one thousand years or even ten thousand, for congress/senate/president/etc.

You'll have CEOs and upper executives who have lived for 80k years dropping out of hypersleep once a century to document how the shoreline of north america changes near their beach home, as a sort of hobby.

Fart huffing professors (it's a professional sport in the year 28,841 AD) will come out of sleep once every millenia to track the evolution of something irrelevant, like gnat penises.

Big game hunters will wake up every 100k years to hunt new big game prey that just evolved--back into extinction. That and to check with their portfolio managers who will be AI or a highly evolved mongoloid goblin race of slave-quants.

I'm still working on the game btw. Anyone up for testing some prototypes when they're ready?

I think the sleep deprived me is finally cracking under the weight of incompetent assholes.

We just launched a major project in some weird cocktail of Agile slapped with MVP and release to the wild in a waterfall, but it was premature, premature in the sense QA hasn't even finished their side of things, but because some fuck with with "manager" in their title decided they have burnt through the budget with incompetence and scrapped an entire element of the project and outsourced just so they could make a shittier version that doesn't even fucking work.

How hard do you want to fail before you will start listening to the people that now have to work around the fucking clock to clean up this horse shit of a mess.

I'm literally arguing over field mapping with multiple 3rd parties, when the fucking requirements state WTF this is suppose to look like. All because they didn't validate or test their own shit.

Why is EVERY FUCKING cock head in this industry a waste of space and cash! Is it really to much to ask for 1 fucking project to fucking go live that actually fucking works where I don't need to work 2 weeks straight (including weekends) after going live just to be sure that what shit does hit the fan isn't going to create a SEV 1 issue...

Sorry, I'm pissed at the incompetence of others I need to deal with on a daily basis. It's not like this field is insanely hard. A little attention to detail and self validation, verification goes a long way. But clearly that's a rarity.

Once this shit is stable and actually works, I'll be pulling out the mop to clean up half this shit just so it actually works.

Oof, I'm getting to old for this bullshit.

Came into work with absolutely no sleep. And now after a couple of hours everything around the office looks weird like I've never noticed stuff before.

Or maybe I'm seeing things...

I fucking need sleep.

do you ever dream about codes that you have to solve before going to bed in your sleep?

dude fuck fucking salesforce i fucking hate the day someone came up with the brilliant ass idea of inventing this garbage crm software that i must deal with even though it is not my area. i fucking hate the developer experience to do third-party implementations, not letting you upload changes to another environment for the sake of """"good practices"""", the fucking interface is slow as shit i could've already had intense hto sex, taken a shit, cook lunch and sleep 2 hours before it can load a single retarded lightning page.
why? WHY? WHYYY? WHY MUST THIS ASSWARE EXIST? WHY?

AS A FACT I'VE WRITTEN THIS RANT BEFORE THE DAMN PAGE EVEN LOADED A CONFIGURATION SECTION. GOD HELP US.

So I've just finished a long day at work (warehouse) from 5.45 till 1.30, got home, had some herb tea, started dropping off, then my cunt of a mate sets a firecracker off IN MY TUPPERWARE, CRACKING THE BASTARD, THEN FUCKING THREATENS ME WHEN I TELL HIM TO SIT DOWN BEFORE I BREAK HIS NOSE. I don't know whether to just kill him or beat the shit out of him, but I'm sick of him doing shit like this when I finally manage to drop off to sleep (I don't sleep well).

FUCKING COCK SUCKING CUM STAIN.

I really want to try to beat the shit out of him but at the same time he's my best mate, what should I do, because I'm FUCKING SICK OF IT?!?

So you all think that coffee is the best energy brewage? I can say that it isnt! At least for me...

I ate a dark chocolate bar a.p. 10pm yesterday and i couldnt even go to sleep. In the morning i have never felt so awake before and i managed to get to the lecture not on a tram but by foot...

Also my depression is gone and i want to fix my life

My experience two weeks into being married:

1. Any other couple can fuck off. We're the protagonists now.

2. My sleep schedule has done a complete 180. I start my day at 7 am now, previously it was 12 afternoon. I also sleep early at 10 pm now. I feel a lot better about this schedule tbh.

3. My wife has an office job, so I get my work done in peace and am able to wrap up my day early to make time for her when she gets home.

4. She's serious about investments, stock market, SIPs, Gold prices or whatever and actively puts money into those things. Good for me.

5. Going out with her is actually fun, because we plan our Sunday ahead of time. I used to scoff at other couples before, but now I get it. It may look cringy from the outside but not to me it doesn't.

!dev

I just had one guy coming back to the house at 4am, again, and he made his usual grand entrance, slamming the doors, stomping on the wooden floor making all the creaking sound as he walk all the way to his room, which is right beside mine. And when he went into the bathroom, which is on the other side of my room, he slammed he motherfucking lid on the toilet bowl which was so fucking loud I literally jumped out of bed. I ended up not being able to sleep (I have a lot of trouble falling asleep), and when I tried to sleep in the afternoon to catch up on the missed winks, another motherfucking bastard started blasting fucking hardcore electronics in the living room which is right below my room. The same bastard also plays loud movies or music at 2-3am. I’ve told that bastard that comes home late to watch his noise but man he only minds the noises I told him and nothing else. As for the other fucker, he’ll say he’d keep it down but continues doing what he’s doing anyway.

I moved here cause I know that it’s usually a quiet place and away from the party kids, but I somehow ended up with a party kid and an insensitive fucker (This motherfucker had the loudest sigh of frustration when I knocked politely on his door last night. Yes I calmed down before I talked to him, but ended up deciding to not utter a word at all when I hear that sigh).

I should move out, but I can’t find a place before next term cause it’s way too late at this point. I am on a lease, but my landlord understands my situation, and he seems okay with breaking the contract.

Having been here as an international student for almost 2 years now, and having moved 5 times, this has been the worst nightmare of a bunch of people to stay with.

For those that has read of me ranting about this elsewhere, yes it’s that same fucking bunch that doesn’t clean the house.

I have a 24 hours hackathon tomorrow (25 hours actually because of the time change).
I want to learn and create an app and I opted for xamarin as a development platform. Problem was: I didn't have enough space in my windows partition (it's a ~40Gb partition in a 128Gb ssd) so, as I am not using Ubuntu that much I simply deleted its partitions from Windows and installed visual studio with xamarin. I played a bit with it, everything was working fine, I switched it off and I was feeling great for my wonderful problem solving abilities and I was ready to go to bed to have a nice 10 hours sleep before the big event. I was about to sleep when I realised it was my cousin's birthday and I hadn't said "happy birthday" so I switch my computer back on and there I realised how much I had fucked up.
The grub wasn't working anymore and I couldn't boot.
I've just spent the last 3 or 4 hours trying to figure out how to make my computer boot normally using my housemates' laptops to create bootable USBs for Windows and Ubuntu
Thanks to some random commands in the trial version of Ubuntu I managed to disinstall the grub and make windows start but thanks to my experimentations while trying to fix the problem I am now waiting for visual studio + xamarin (~35Gb) to download and install again.
Tomorrow's gonna be great

!dev

i think i need to control my emotions and expression around girls. things are going quite wrong and i am not sure i am able to interact with this beautiful gender correctly.

<misc: somewhat unrelated event. need to vent>

- got called out "a creep", "jerk", and "hypocrite" by this girl. she may be totally correct in calling me these but these words made me think about my behavior and therefore this post .

- characters? she: a friend of a friend, to whom i have met 3-4 times, in trips where we drank together, danced together nd talked till late night, among other people.
me : well me . based on previous allegations you can also label me as creep and hypocrite , but i would describe myself as an introvert, nerdy person who talks better on a keyboard than real life (otherwise i wouldn't be typing this post but whatever.)

- action : i made a comment on her insta story

- action details:
• we follow each other on insta. it was 12 am and i was in a half sleep state, scrolling the damn app before falling asleep
• saw her story with his 3 girl nd 2 guy cousins probably, so out of fun, replied her about how all of their specs look the same and if they all take out their specs from the same shop (cheeky comment, i know)
• she just erupted. from asking whether i also wanna buy from the same shop, to why am i talking to her, who gave you the right to compliment, jerk, hypocrite who can't talk in real life but compliments on keyboard, to creep and "stay away"
• I really wanted to say sorry at some point, but i kept making more cheeky comments in between. i was like , yeah she is my friend going through something and bursting her anger on me, she will come back and laugh, but she kept going towards hypocrite, jerk and finally stay away thing

• after that i knew i crossed the line and immediately got out of the conversation. i didn't apologize though.
• as of now am calm and don't mind the current situation of she being angry at a person who means nothing to her and me realising she is not a friend but a common connection . and till the time i was making cheeky comments, i saw her as my homie friend, so i am not bothered if she is angry
</misc>

I think i am a very needy person. i didn't have many friends in school time and i didn't had any relatives/cousins/siblings to get a lot of affection. a 25 yo horny virgin with no relationships till date does give a bad personality vibe from far, but keep in mind that i have mainly focused on personality growth and a conservative chsracter development my whole life. i do not act on my lonly feelings, but i try to be helpful and nice to everyone (which might be a suspicious/bad thing. just trying to defend my character, but feel free to judge)

every girl that talks nice with me, i get very helpful, nice and cheeky with them. most girls likes nd ignores these things, but some also get along, trust me and are willing to spend more time with me.

This makes me not only be more nice and cheeky with them but also start developing feelings for them and imagining my future/relation with them.

as of now i think there are 12 or 13 girls with whom i got into "vibing" (here, assume that vibing means me talking with them, cracking jokes nd compliments, meeting them alone ,etc. no adult stuff ofc), nd then after a few days told them directly or indirectly that i like them ( in a hope of getting some affection back i guess), getting rejected and still trying to keep the "friendship"

i think this needs to be changed. the people calling me creep, despo, perv , whatever might be correct in calling me those till now(based in my behavior) but i don't wanna be that.

i need to understand the girls might not want anything more than just a help at some point and then be done with it. I shouldn't be going out a limb and trying to get i to conversation/flirt/whatever.

i just am too emotional to let any person go away from my life just because our reason for interaction is over.
If I am commenting on a girl's post to whom i met on some trip, i will be commenting on a guy's post (to whom i met on a similar trip) too , in a similar manner,

if i see a post from one of my school's batchmates , and i find it nice/funny/weird, i will comment as if me and this batchmate met yesterday and not for 1 hr 10 years ago (irrespective of the gender)

and even after that if people are so intolerant, then maybe i am wrong and rather should start forgetting every person with whom i have spent less than 50 days alone.

hope this is the correct math and i could expect people with 50 days = 600+ hours of daytime to be enough to not see me as a stranger

Looked at this and thought, wow, I must’ve gone to bed really early on Wednesday (ons)
Then I realized... all the other days were just really late and barely and sleep. Maybe try to go to bed before midnight this week...

There are a couple of things I like to do before sitting down to code for the first time on a project. Throughout all of this I'm (sometimes unconsciously) planning out the project.

- Clean the house;
- Buy groceries;
- Buy/prepare food & eat;
- Arrange everything on my desk so that everything looks slick as fuck;
- Actually sit down to do something;
- Realize it's past midnight;
- Go to sleep.

Sometimes I wonder if I have OCD...

When you want to finish before to sleep. 4h26. Good night.

It took literally days to get our software installed onto the client VMs and get the services started correctly.

On our own test VMs the same task takes all of about an hour or so. Mind you these VMs are supposed to be created and match the client's environment almost too the T. Same configurations, same third party software, same environment variables and the whole 9 yards.

This was not the case at all.

Environment variables were not set, third party software was not installed, and I honestly don't remember the list of things wrong with how they setup the VM. Sparing the details, the errors were also not helpful.

They also gave us critical information we needed for development days before we were going on site to test. The amount of hackery we had to do could be a completely separate rant on its own.

While desperately trying to to stay sane long enough to get our services started, the only thing I could think was how great it would be if there was a fire or something. Anything, just to have an excuse to go back to the hotel and actually sleep. The second day there we finally had everything installed and running.

I shit you not, just as we began our first test, the fire alarms went off.

At this point in time the team was extremely (pissed tf off) annoyed to put it mildly. Assuming it was just a drill, we left our stuff and went to eat dinner. After we came back we found out it in fact was not a drill...

Moral of the story:
Don't wish bad fortune on a customer even if out of impulsive spite.

Other moral of the story:
Don't leave your belongings behind only because you think the fire alarms are just a fire drill. It may not be.

P.S. Karma's a bitch.

Hopefully, you already know that the company controlled by the alledged reptiloid subhuman and olimpic testicle juggler formerly known as Mister Zuck My Tits is not to be trusted.

But as is always the case in this bitch, I've been forced into cowjizz flooded swamps' worth of stinking shit platforms for the sake of avoiding isolation.

And so, I've just found yet another way in which Facebook **THUNDERSTRIKE** ... the company, not the geriatric ward, is one of the CROWN ACHIEVEMENTS of human civilization.

Let me tell you something: some people are fucking broke. Hell, some people sleep on the streets, live on scraps, and willingly engage in acts of public defecation when provoked. But I'm not even talking about them no, just plain *broke*.

And so imagine being that guy who doesn't really use his phone much, except maybe for sharing cat pictures with mom because that's what being an absolute chad is all about. You don't get a new phone, because money is a __little__ bit tight. But THEN...

The dreaded CAPITAL strikes, and requests of you to bend and fall onto your knees so as to provide intense, intimate and manual -- as well as oral -- PLEASURE to the [NOT SO] METAPHORICAL PENIS of the """SYSTEM""".

Oh, what an abominable, drooooooling revenant that lies before you!

"Gimme your ass... " he says, menacingly, as you wail about in a futile attempt to guard and preserve the very last vestiges of your own anal virginity.

And so you fight, and kick him in the NADS with everything you have, down to the final shreds of vigor. Victory! Or so you thought...

"You must... " he mutters, mortally wounded "update WhatsApp... "

"Still you breathe?!" you exclaim, suddenly transformed into a heroic, sexy moustachoed arquebusier "After I'm done ~OILING~ my VICTORIOUS CHEST, I *shall* bestow DEATH uppon you!".

But as you rip open your shirt to apply sensual oiling to your marvellous frontal assets, your nemesis reveals it's portentous Portugal: "this new version of Android... " he gasps as he perishes "is incompatible with your device... "

"Ughh! Sacrebleu!" you shriek out in pain, realizing that you are now unable to ACCESS THE FUCKING DATA THAT IS IN YOUR OWN FUCKING HARDWARE BECAUSE OF A STUPID FORCED BINARY INCOMPATIBILITY.

That's right. Now even if I *do* get a new phone, I can't do shit about losing all of the family memes. And contacts and all of that shit, but the stickers are more important. A minor inconvenience, yes, and it didn't need all of this preamble but I was doing the dramatic fight scene bit inside my head as I was writing and I got into it.

Because the only documented way to transfer all of that data is to OPEN THE APPLICATION and scan some code, but everytime I go to do that, IT TELLS ME I NEED TO UPDATE. And every time I GO TO UPDATE, it says that MY PHONE is TOO FUCKING OLD!! AAAAAAAGHGHGHGHGHGHGHG!!!!

And you too, might be a dashing french man from centuries past, with both balls and tits down to your fucking knees, folding your arms in a position that exhumes smugness in a disgustingly irreverent and self-aggrandizing way, looking at me as a mere plebeian who cannot wrap his head around the mystical art of interacting with Google's black deuce box.

And you would be somewhat right in your judgement! But just having to fiddle about with these fucking pocket Elmo screens is such a traumatic experience for me that I'd rather lose my stickers.

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Get your bottle of scents, sensual Portuguese chest oils, and fucking designer-drug bath salts for the low, low price of a passionate, unceassing self-blowjob! And use my code FRONTALASSETS for 60% OFF in your next soul-robbing foray into the felational dark arts!

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:~

So just babbling my shit down here.

(Tldr : i am a crazy guy who followed my half slept brain, went onto a stage , gave some kind of motivating , stammering talk to a large group of professional strangers, enjoyed that day with a red embarrassed face and just got my first pic of me speaking on stage and that is so awesome !)

Last Saturday i went to a gdg meetup and i embarrassed the hell out of me.

I went there with just 2 hours of sleep from the previous night.
After a few talks there comes a guy who is taking some time to install is setup and the host calls for lightning round session ( ie he asks if anyone from the audience would like to share something about their product or something).

I am a fucking nutt guy. I can explain something to you nicely in a hacky way as long as i have done enough work on that and you speak my native language.

But giving a talk on English stage, hell no! I stammer, mix hindi with English and start speaking werd shit.. And that's what happened.

I don't know what went into me but as some guy went to the stage and talked for 2 mins, i was like yeah i want to do that too. So in next turn when he asked for a show of hands, i raised mine and fucking went to stage!

I forgot that if you go on stage you should have something to talk to . But the moment i was on stage, i was like... "Nope, we will do this differently".
I had been working on a video ads module from the last week which could be easily explained in 2 mins. But i felt like giving a non techy talk instead.

It went something like this: i introduced myself with my experience details ( who gives experience details on stage !?!) Then host said to speak loudly and i went like "Bharat mata ki jai!"( Victory to mother india (wtf!?😆) .

Then started talking about how the developers feel disheartened when searching on internet where the resources are scattered . And the solution i told them was :"don't be disheartened. You will eventually find it (like wow dude wtf, as if they didn't knew that) . Look on the youtube and other resources " and then went full on explaining/marketing about some online tutor who gives advice/consultancy via a subscription based payment ( tbf that guy really helped solve a lot of my doubts, he has written books on Android dev and is the top so answerer for Android).

Then i went on sharing my thoughts live on that fuckin stage ! ( Live because i usually post my thoughts here on devrant before discussing them out with real people, you guys are my safe space) but there i discussed my thoughts on libraries!

I have this believe that Android devs these days are having lesser knowledge of the system because we have all the libraries and templates available to us. But when we have to customize stuff, we need to go deep into docs and source classes and find ourselves in trouble there. So i kind of said this out loud and that we should try to read more the code and implement stuff ourselves instead of using the library 😅🙈)

I was feeling so fucking embarrassing after that all stuff! It was so full of stammering , broken English and worst attempt at motivation. At that time i was regretting this and about to burst cry and run away, but somehow i gathered my self, got my mood back to the event games and talks, later went to the organizers and apologized(and they were very nice and didn't cared about it), and overall enjoyed my weirdest day!

When i came home, my mom gave me a little more confidence about it. Now i think i shouldn't be that much instinctive. Next day i went hack to work and everything got normal.

But Yesterday i found a link to the public repository of the photos. Ohh fuck, someone had took my image! and that was too in full hd!!! 🙈🙈🙈😅😆😆 Oh mann I can't stop looking at that cool stage speaker image, i love it ! I, the shy-est and the most uncool awkward person , present on the stage with a mike, oof , i think i lived my dream !

I hope i could get enough confidence and speaking skills to take a real stage talk next time ( and maybe enough interesting talks and confidence to talk with girls of our office, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

As a programmer, I puts two glasses on my bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case I gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case I don’t.

1st day of the job tomorrow.

Tried to reset my (broken) sleep pattern by going to bed earlier and getting up at half 5, which is the time I'll need to get up. In typical fashion, I just didn't sleep. I just laid there with my eyes closed. This has happened before, so I know what will happen - no sleep again tomorrow and I start my first day after being awake for ~48hrs...

Fuck you, insomnia.

Again found myself before deadline. My excuse? I'm more productive during the deadline rush :D
How everyone else sees it: you fucked up
What do I say to myself: never again!!!
```
sleep(until_next_deadline);
goto begining_of_this_post;
```

The train stopped 50m before the stop because there was another train there. We stood still for 35 minutes. And it wasn't like I could sleep either, since I didn't want to miss my stop. Fucking bullshit.

Just wanted to root my phone again.
My carrier had an update but unrooting did not help to get it installed.

What it did though, was restoring my recovery partition.

So booting my phone in recovery mode, saying twice that I want to reset my phone (just the layer before booting into recovery).
Aaand... It actually erased. 😮

So having little sleep tonight because I need to install all my necessary apps again.

Stay up all night coding. Wake up hating myself. Repeat. I haven't been to sleep before midnight in at least a year.

A programmer puts two glasses on their bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case they gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case they don’t.

Does anyone debug when sleeping?
I often think about a problem before I sleep. The idea is shaping in my mind while asleep and I find the solution of a problem just when I woke up.

Establishing an eating schedule was truly a brilliant decision. It allowed me not to eat right before I go to sleep, keeping my stomach empty and making my body lose fat every single night.

As far as I keep breathing, the chemical reaction that makes me alive (CHn + O2 => H20 + CO2 + Energy) just need to continue, and when my stomach is empty, my body is just forced to burn fat.

It works like a charm. No “fat-burning” supplements and other MLM BS is needed. You just need to adjust the schedule so you never feel hungry. If you need to eat five times a day to achieve this, so be it. Just allow two to three weeks to establish a schedule and learn how to maintain it. Recurrent reminder apps are helpful.

I’m off liraglutide for more than two months now and I’m keep losing weight without any meds and my digestive behavior changed entirely.

If only I had emotional resources to make this happen earlier, there wouldn’t be pre-diabetes, numb feet, apnoe, stretch marks…

Family support (2 phases)

When I was younger my mom bought me a 486 from the cow spotted company.

I didn't do much development as being kinda isolated in computer land didn't really make that easy to understand / do, but I messed with everything else.

At that time (somewhere near the invention of the wheel) just exposure to computers really gave a huge leg up on getting into tech.

Moving on until MUCH later in life I was working in tech, often with developers, but not in development. That company was acquired by an overseas company, the head of the new company appeared on the white house lawn and Trump said this would be great for America jobs ... so of course they laid a huge number of people off just before the acquisition.

I was kinda done with that corner of the industry, no matter how good you are / who you work for it was an area that just sort of decays in in importance. I'd go visit the developers and they'd share their excess free lunches they got each day.

Then I'd go back to my corner of the offices and read an email about how the quarterly crappy ass pizza party (that maybe cost a couple hundred busks) was called off due to "cost cutting".

By this time I've got a family and kids, and I decide to take a chance at starting a new career and they were kind enough to go along with my "sleep, care for family, school, care for family, code, sleep" lifestyle for a number of months.

And it worked out.

Stayed up extra late fixing a bug. Fucking bug is buried in a thousand lines of MOTHERFUCKING SML.
FUCKING ASSHOLE SHIT-WAGGLING COCKSMEAR AND THAT SHITTY, GODDAMNED BACKWARDS FUCKING LANGUAGE!
Fucking wasted an entire night chasing down a fucking bug in SML with no positive effect.
I wound up commenting out 7/8 of the entire fucking codebase to try to find the fucking bug. No positive effect.
Finally had to go to sleep because my son was about two hours from waking up.
Getting back to work, and within twenty minutes I found the fucking bug and fixed it.
Fucking wasted nearly an entire night's sleep, and I ended up fixing the fucking bug before finishing my morning coffee.
I seriously fucking hate motherfucking SML.

Goals before wk200:
0. Get the hell out of this Geophysics faculty and transfer to Computer science faculty in university which I was dreaming of since I was high school freshman.
1. Meet my girlfriend. (I'm in long distance relationship and there's a huge ocean between us).
2. Get to be able to learn probability in Math so I can understand AI topic.
3. Get better money from my amazon business.
4. Get better sleep.
5. Stop being so scared of dentists and go fucking fix my tooth that hurts.
6. Lose weight.
7. Don't buy video-games that I'm not going to play after a week and forget about it.
8. Listen to the Math lectures.
9. Stop feeling the need to kiss the girl that sits next to me in university (Which is by the way my BFF ).
That's all I can think of yet.

I fucking hate webpack and frontend development so fucking much, why do I have to see my site not loading the bundled JS code on production but being absolutely fine in dev? is like watching my mom being run by a car over and over and over while I try to remember how it all was before she gets run over, FUCKING STOP WEBPACK, I havent sleep but just 4 hours since yesterday, I NEED YOU TO WORK JUST AS YOU DID IN DEV WITHOUT THE PERKS OF HMR FFS, JUST FUCKING DO IT

The company that manages my ISA for Lambda emails on a regular basis to get you to update your income. I got annoyed by the frequency while I was employed so started filtering everything.

Though I’ve been up to date with reporting income to them and submitting tax documents, etc, I apparently missed some important emails.

Like the one on the 4th saying a third party provider flagged by account for employment with CompanyA and that I needed to submit my pay stubs for CompanyA.

I do not and have never worked for CompanyA. My husband works for CompanyA.

I also missed the email from the 12th saying I’m in breach of contract and owe them $19,091.65 immediately.

*head desk*

I’m so mad I can’t even.

Why did i check my email before going to sleep?

AND I POSTED RECENTLY SO I CAN’T EVEN RANT YET. *

*Waited it out

As usual before sleeping i set a timer for shutdown cuz i use my hotspot to surf devrant in bed before sleeping.

My roommate( lets call him AB) sees me writing the command.

AB: what are you doing?
Me: setting a timer to shutdown my computer.

AB: oh nice i want that too... is it just a linux thing?
Me: nope u can do it on windows.. just search the cmd command on google and u are good to go.

AB: you do it. You search.
Me: huh? Why would i do that? Bitch it is simple just google "cmd command shutdown timer" and open the first result.

AB: *extremely dissapointed face and starts searching* i dont understand anything.
Me: AB! The instructions literally explain everything! I can see!!

AB: you are good at computers, u are a computer engineer (im just a second year student)
Me: fuck off *i go to sleep*

Next day i learned that he did it after i left him, and that it did shutdown but he wasnt done with his work and he was too lazy to google how to cancel it.... JUST GOOGLE DAMMIT!!!