A client wanted me to make a website that compared the users face to that of a wrestler. We had done a lot of work, but now he wants to switch it...

to pornstars.

So, I guess the next week of my work is gonna be scraping porn websites. NSFW, for work.

Programmer boyfriend: *explaining his work and code and how things work*

PBF: does that make sense?

Me: of course

Narrator: it did not make sense

My boss is a bit annoyed that I’m listening to the music in my headphones during work.
“Are you sure it doesn’t make you lose the focus?”

Fuck you!
The will to quit is everyday greater.

"Remember that script you made a few years ago? How did you make it work with product x?"

Dude, I can barely remember how I brewed coffee this morning.

Just an idea.

If I remember correctly, Symbian OS was a free, open-source OS, right?

How about people start working with it again? It could make a great Android alternative if enough were willing to work with it.

"Can our app work from 8am to 9pm, Monday to Friday?"
"Yes but it's an app, it can run 24 hours a day, 7 days a week."
"Oh... Is it possible to make it work only from 8am to 9pm Monday to Friday? They're our opening times and we want everything consistent!"

Slippery slope, a very slippery slope...

Tried to impress the boss with my work ethic by staying late to install a new VoIP system. Wasn’t even part of my job description. A few days later I had a flat tire on the way to work. It took me a couple hours to get that taken care of. When I got to work, the boss told me I had to work 2 extra hours that week to make it up. I reminded him that I had worked overtime recently to install his new phone system. He said, “Doesn’t matter. You still need to make up the hours.”

From that moment on I never worked one second more for him than I had to. I quit less than a year into the job.

I can't believe that something I threw together in an afternoon to make my work flow better turned into something people actually use! People are opening issues and suggesting things. Never thought it would get over 2.5k downloads! 😮

You realize how beautiful it is to work in the back-end when...

"Can you move it down 1px?"
"Can you try this color?"
"Can you make it pop more?"
"Can you make the animation 0.01ms faster?"

Millions more...

Whenever you figure out an incredibly simple solution to make your code work after being frustrated by it for hours on end.

Dear Chrome,

I know it's ridiculous to have 50+ tabs open, but please - pretty please - just make it work for me. 300 MB/tab is starting to make Windows mad.

No, I will not close them. I might need that page I opened 4 months ago and was too lazy to bookmark.

Your abusive friend,

-chappjc

Pro tip: NEVER work when you’re tired, and if you absolutely HAVE to, make sure you do it in your TIRED branch.

Dev: So how do you want this feature fixed?

Manager: It should work how it worked before.

Dev: I'm new to this feature, I don't know how it worked before or what is broken about it.

Manager: Well just make it work like it worked before.

Dev: I DONT KNOW HOW IT WORKED BEFORE THAT IS WHY I AM ASKING YOU. PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN DO MY JOB.

Manager: Just how it worked before!

Dev: ...

Manager: ...

Dev: fuck you

I love coming home from classes to get some work done on my setup.
My thought is; if I'm going to be sitting here for hours at a time working, may as well make it a comfortable environment.

This is why I like it when my colleague can't make it to work 😁

me: "ah, my scraper is nearly done - just need some final tweaks"

coworker: "JuSt FrOm LoOkInG aT yOuR ScReEn A fEw TiMeS tOdAy, I cAn TeLl YoU iT wOnT wOrK"

me, infuriated by his idiot mentality but not trying to start anything: "ah, its fine, I've already scraped 3000+ entities"

coworker: "but it wont work."

me: "but... its working..."

coworker: "but it won't work."

me: "ok."

sometimes its just better to just affirm the narcessistic assholes. make sure they are right.

First you make it work, make it work right then make it faster

!dev
We now have around 10cm snow and it make my way to college around 300% harder,
But I don't care, because this looks fucking beautiful.

Also, I can approve this famous saying about German trains,
"Caution! Doesn't work in case of:
Weather"

Ok, so, to every pieces of shit out there that got a "revolutionary idea that will change the way we look at things" and who asks you to code it :

Fuck you, you sons of a cunt

No, i won't make your app on 3 different platforms for free, i'll make you pay for every platform you wanker, i'm a freelancer, i need money.

No, making database is not something that a little business cunt like you can handle, you don't even know what sql means

And fuck no, I won't make that shit in 2 weeks just because your peabrain thinks that it'll make mad dosh and that "It MusT bE eAsy to Do!!111", "a dating app but with a twist" won't work you gobeshit

If you want me to work on this shit, you give me money, specs and shit, you handle the rest, if it doesn't make money, it'll be your problem. I'm not your employee you wanker

Fuck y'all

Needed to download all my music from Google music, their download manager is crap (on ubuntu)

Decided to use their API, found a gem that works perfectly. Started downloading it.

Told my GF how I wanted to code something cool but gound someone else did, her response:

So why doesn't google make something ?
Me:They did, but it sucks in linux, and they have their API's which work fine.

And how are normal people supposed to make it work then?
Me: well it works, jut have to install this and run the CLI with.... wait.. am I not normal?

I guess we are not normal in the eyes of some people.

Rating:
"1 star for now. Will give 5 stars if it can make me coffee, bring me breakfast in bed and drive me to work."

It's a digital assistant not a literal butler you troll!

I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to all the pressure at work, and my boss sat me down one day and said "Don't take it so personally, it's only work".
He explained that you simply cannot make all the people happy all the time, you can only do your best, and that is good enough.

Here's how a client does "double murder"

-----------------------------

Client to designer: So you can make it run on IE 6,7,8 right?

---------------------------------

Turns to a web Dev who just mastered Node, React, angular: What if user disables JavaScript? It'll still work right?

Me: the websites now works on all devices.
Client: now make it work on IE6.
*1 week later*
Me: the site now works on IE6 too.
Client: awesome, now make it work on Netscape navigator 5

Dearest LinkedIn, no-one *ever* cares about work anniversaries. It's not a thing. Stop trying to make it a thing.

When you work your ass off to meet the deadline and once you miraculously make it, the client decides to wait with the launch for a few more weeks.

"Work is intended to earn you money, you don't have to like it to make a living from it" - my first boss

>Upper management personal hands me a paper.
>"Can you make some copies of this for me?"
>"Why?"
>"You work in IT."

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhbhhbhhhhh

Finally!!!!!

Oh..

My.

F*ing...

G****t

It finally worked!

Holy shit!

I figured out how to make it work. Only took me like 3 weeks. But it works so smoothly now.... Holy f.

FrontEnd developper :

Hello here is the STATIC page you asked. Only takes 300 MB of frameworks to make it work.

Are these people on crack or something ?

$work: Ey @Root, make this super simple thing.
$work: No, not like that.
$work: It also needs to do A, B, and C.
$work: No, not there. You should build it somewhere else, but I won't tell you where.
$work: You need to build out F and G, too.
$work: What do you mean you don't have the data? Just ask support drone #3. (who directs me to #2, and that one to #8 who doesn't know, and that one to #12 who won't answer)
$work: Why can't I do K, Y, or S? You should be able to infer these from the mind of whoever wrote the ticket by its wording, despite no mention of them whatsoever.
$work: Are you done yet? It's a super simple ask!

I think in my case its a monitoring system I'm still writing which does already work (just far from done).

I got this as a crazy idea while thinking that it would be impossible to make and then thought fuck it and I wrote it.

Written in php, and as long as you can write a module for it, you can pretty much make it monitor anything you'd like.

I'm using it to monitor a few websites and servers I run :)

Game Development,
Because it merges together so many interesting fields so well. It has a ton of physics, a lot of art and design, psychology, philosophy, storytelling, music ...
And it really gives you the possibility to make anything work to your rules. The only limit there is is the limits of logic and your hardware.

Client: Here is a project we've been working on. Could you review and make it work? -Thanks.

Me:

A high ranking member of my institution had to partake in certain events that demonstrated coding. Said person came back amazed at the sheer amount of work and knowledge requiered to work in the area.

Yes......maybe that will make said person reconsider the "i needed this by yesterday" and "its only a quick fix" attitude.

BUT! We all know it won't

Ended up with something, to make it work!

Slowly working it up now, actually.

An annually updated, unbiased, multiple source application that engineers can use to check salary offers vs their skills, to make sure they don't get shortchanged. Intended to work for the entire planet (that we have data for).

Today a guy at work asked if it's easy to make an app. I said it depends on what he wants. And oh boi he was very disappointed the more i talked 😂 People really think it's an easy job

Here's a conversation I had at work:

Me: "this project that I've inherited, aside from the UI problems it has, it also has severe code problems that need to be fixed"

Project Manager: "I don't care about the code. The code is not my concern. Don't waste time on it and just make the app look good."

So we outsourced a system.
It was the most stupid thing we could've done.
It's my job to make it fucking work.

So I get to work this morning and see this interesting little contraption on my work colleague's desk.

Safety first: make sure there's a warning sign... Lol.

No idea what he's doing with it though, guess I'll find out later.

So yeah. There is some problem on production. I'm working on it for over a day, and can't make it work. The bad method is 500 lines. The method that calls it is almost 1000 lines and its class is 5k. This is the second one. FML :(

I am roughly 12 hours away from a deadline that seemed pretty impossible.
I finally got everything to work, it seems I'm actually going to make it.
After so many hours of frustration, despair and walking in circles, it is finally fun again :)

Client - "We absolutely totally 100% neeeeeeeeed this plugin added to our wp site that another team built. "

Team - "Nope sorry you can't have it the plugin was deprecated 2 years ago, and the service you want to pull a feed from dost work like that any more. Here are other options A B C D. "

Client - "No we want it. You have to make it work or we are cancelling our account."

Team - "see ya"

Sister: *walks up to me at my desk* Hey, I was wondering if you can undo what you did to the internet and put it back and make it work better in my room and also make it faster
Me: Sure

Yeah, I’ll get right on it and go hit the fucking magic button in the router settings called “enable extended range and make it go faster”.

By heavens creating your own api server with the Go standard lib is so easy it should be fucking criminal.

Now....on to add authentication and a nice frontend stack(prob React) to make it all spiffy and show it to my manager and see if she lets me put this shit to use at work.

It will make it more interesting. It took me nearly 1 hour to get what I needed from the docs, build it using the net package first(das right babe, pure TCP) and just a couple of minutes more for net/http and boom. Ferching info and shit left and right

Man I love this shit. Wish I could do this for a living. Stuck fucking around with css, Java and php at work instead ;____;

- hire a new Dev.
- not burnout this year
- work less, deliver more
- start a open source side project and make it production ready

The more I work here the clearer it gets:
I just fucking can't make websites anymore.
I totally can't work on graphics, I can't transform a PSD into responsive HTML.

I fucking despise CSS, computers having different resolutions, having different browsers, doing mobile, doing iOS/safari which is always something extra.

I'm tired of not getting the appropriate resources and then people asking me why it just doesn't look the same.

BECAUSE IT'S NOT MY FUCKING JOB! I MAKE STUFF WORK, I DON'T MAKE IT LOOK PRETTY, I HATE PRETTY THINGS

When a co-worker requested changes on a PR giving the reason "I am a fan of'".
No because it will optimize the application, or make the code more maintainable. He's just a fan. Like I went to work to look for fans.

The feeling when you finally figure something out, make the change, test... and it still doesn't work.

Past few weeks, I have started to work late night and sleep whole day. I go to office at around 7pm and returns back next day 8-9am. I found it super productive.
But, my manager wasn't happy about it and now, she shifted daily scrum at 1 PM and emailed me to make sure I attend it daily.
Now, I have to fix my sleeping cycle... Nights are so great to work. Silent and nobody around.
Now, from tomorrow, I got a new challenge everyday to make it to scrum daily.

Anyone else approach coding with the mindset of - "make it work, then make it right".

It really helped me up my productivity

Programs are like humans. First you need to do baby steps and make it work like you want it, and teach it how to work. Then after the release the youth brings a lot of bugs and swearing. Finally it's grown up and can handle itself. Then it gets old and no one are so attracted to it anymore. It rests in peace on a old storage drive, and gets replaced by a new generation. 👶🏼👦🏽👨🏽👴🏽

GUYS I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE:

Apparently Windows Explorer is an internet browser and a lot of websites only work on it

I fucking hate this dude, he CLEARLY doesn't know what he's talking about

The deadline is tomorrow and we should work for extra hours to make it through! Oh look, a video about roman army structure!

My boss: "We need this feature by Friday"
Me: "I can make it work, but I need more time to do it properly"
Boss: "Just fix it by Friday, and you can make a proper implementation later, when there is time"

Like there will ever be time once it works...

"I'll send you the list with a few small changes to make on my website. It won't take you long, a few minutes I guess."

= ALWAYS at least 1-2 hours of work

Me: No that will not work. It wouldnt make any sense.

Client: make it work.

Me: .-. *sight*

Conversation between my husband and myself.

H: I ordered a game for the switch last week. It was delayed by USPS, and it looks like I got a partial refund due to it being late.
Moi: That's your mail privilege at work.
H: Did you really just make a mail pun? *Snerk*
Moi: This is why we work. ♥️

My company that I work for now is making me work on my personal laptop for the past 4 months! Like wth! It’s work from home y’all, and you gotta work 24/7 but on your own laptops! A thing came up for a new project, and my laptop doesn’t have enough space for it, they were like, delete your stuff, make space! Wtf! It’s called a personal laptop for a reason!

It is kinda sad to see some software that looks quite promising, and when I check how-to-deploy crap it is only;
"Copy and paste this shit to make it work"

People are not learning anything.

I feel like I'm in an abusive relationship with Ubuntu.

I love it but whenever I'm with it it screws up my environment and doesn't work when I need it to.

I go back to Windows reluctantly and get everything set up and stable. I'm happy, but not excited about it. And then, within a few months, I get that thought. Maybe if I put enough work in I can make Ubuntu work for me as my main environment.

Anyone else work in a codebase that is so deeply convoluted, that the only way to make new features work is to write new code in a similarly convoluted way?

Everyone wants to refactor our system, but we're a small shop with an insane amount of technical debt, so it likely won't happen for a long time. Any suggestions in the meantime? I feel like I'm spending more time figuring out how to make something work in our system then learning actual good practices.

That moment you work out how to get Google Home to make webhook calls, setup a Rpi to accept incoming https requests, and can’t think of anything to actually make it do

Ideas welcome 😂😂

Me in school: Math? When do I need know those details? I can look them up and just code it.

Me in high school: Computer science is way too math-y. I want to code!

Me coding php: Just make it work.

Me coding typescript: Just make it work.

Me coding scala: Just make it ... what ... how do I make it work!?!

Me asking stackoverflow: How do I do X in scala some functional programming stuff in mind in order to keep immutability.

Somebody way smarter than I: "In scalaz, a function A => A is called an endomorphism and is a Monoid whose associative binary operation is function composition and whose identity is the identity function"

Me now: Fuck my old arrogant self.

Should i make my game open source? It will be free, but i'm worried about theifs..
(reuploading as their work, or selling)

We're gonna make t-shirts connected with smart advertisements on it. I heard you are a programmer, I'll only need a web site and mobile app. If it work I may pay you. But you know it's seems quite easy I'm note sure you'll need money for that.

1) Glassdoor

2) Only work on open source projects so you can see what you're getting yourself into.

3) Avoid job postings that use the words "polygot" and "passion" in the same sentence.

4) Work for yourself. Build a product or service to make you money, and if it doesn't pay for itself sell it.

That AMAZING feeling when you make your program work as it is supposed to do

"Intense coding. A day passes. Wait, how the fuck did my code work? It doesn't make any sense!"

It happens so, so often, God why 😐

Dear companies.

Please don't read resume on holidays.
It make me doubt work environment.

Not ONLY does the new code a coworker wrote straight up not work (and they somehow managed to merge it to master) but it also broke an entirely unrelated endpoint due to an abstraction they tried to make. Very clear they didn't even run their code at all.

I remember when I was first learning recursion, i thought whoever thought of it must've been on some kickass drugs because it all sounded like sorcery. Just solved my first problem at work that recursion actually made simpler. Does that make me a wizard?

"Make it work, then make it better."

Get your tests passing. Then refactor to improve it.

Well in America, developer is the current "hot" career if you wanna make bank and rightly so, you can make a great salary. However the "business types" politicize the position since it's trendy right now and do all sorts of undesirable things like looking for "10x" or "rockstar" devs, etc. It's really just an excuse to have you on call 24/7. Some jobs, you go home, but you never really clock out of work. Well, if you even make it home; you could end up always travelling for your work.

But at least it's a romanticized and well paid position, unlike system admin, who may work the same hours but will never have the "cool" job.

Two of my team members were trying to make a website responsive for over an hour. They tested everything. They checked the JavaScript, checked their CSS media queries, tried everything but it just wouldn't work on mobile browsers.

So as usual they decided it was "impossible" due to "WordPress constraints" and told me that it would work on the browser but not desktop.

I just added the meta viewport tag. It literally took 10 seconds. It worked.

I hate people who give up easily. Just hate it.

PM emails me a zip file with the message "Can you give the attached a look and get it to work. See email below that there are some items missing to make it run."

Items missing : 3 custom libraries, 2 sql databases, 3 custom sql tables, and oh yeah the license to the program it runs on.

I only went and left my god damn bag on the train with my work laptop in it (2016 Macbook Pro, started this job 2months ago...). Now I have to get up at 5 fucking 30 am to make a 5 hour round trip to collect it while making up a BS excuse to WFH, or more accurately - work from some cafe in a random city 200 miles away. FML

FUCKING FINALLY TIME!!!
I did it! I made IntelliJ IDEA find my Android SDK installation!
Thanks SO!!!
Now I can experience the joy of Gradle build times!!!

Why did Google had to make so difficult to work with Android without its Studio?!?!?!

So, today I tried using my C/++ Code in Java using native jvm stuff.
It's cancer to make it work but damn it's cool.

Opening up the docs, a book or a bunch of random pages online.

build something stupidly horrible to familiarise myself with different aspects and rinse and repeat until it’s something I think is worthy of being released into the wild.

Have any one used Skype for business, It seems to me it has down syndrome.
They cant just make a simple think work.

Rofl. Used this saying at work. Writing software is like having a child. Make one mistake and you have to support it for the next eighteen years

Just make it work.

:/

Conspiracy theory: Google sent rogue pro devs to work for IE and make it so bad everyone would come running to Chrome for a savior.

The development process that my boss called SCRUM. It was anything but. Management thought they could make us do more work than possible.

Yay! Finally got my first job in IT.

They call it just "IT admin/sysadmin", but it's... eh..
What I do is make sure the servers work (sysadmin part) and make desktop/mobile apps. So far, the company seems to be quite nice, there are already 4 devs who are friendly. *knocks on wood*

Will see how it goes, and I'd like to thank you for sharing your stories. Learned quite a lot from them!

My friend has a smart watch, and he is always watching the time. Texting. I meant to say texting. He's always texting at work. I have a traditional watch, so I like to make fun of him by very loudly saying "Hey Siri" into my watch a few times and acting confused when it doesn't work.

"Don't waste time on security, just make it work" heard this from a "security head manager" at a 1 million eval. company 3 years ago

Just make it work.

I am currently blocked from doing my job by a firewall policy handed down from corporate that prevents WSL2 from connecting to the internet. Three days of no dev environment and counting.

We make linux software to be hosted on linux in linux containers in linux. We use linux command line tools to make it work.

"NO! WE ARE THE ALL-POWERFUL IT DEPARTMENT AND YOU MUST USE WINDOWS BECAUSE FUCK YOU THAT'S WHY."

*pointing on IE icon* but does it work on the internet?

Setting my lovely grandma's new router since she now got fiber. Opening Firefox and pages load fast, still had to show that is also worked on "internet" to make her happy

When a client says they no longer have time for one of their websites and asks you to make it completely autonomous.

Yeah sure, I'll go ahead and install Skynet on it right away!

I no longer have any motivation to work with that client.

i want you to make zoom available in this bootstrap fancybox , but it should work perfectly in IE , tv, phones, bilboards , fridges, and microwaves...

"Did you know that if you put two exclamation marks at the end of a function, server will prioritize that function and make it work faster?"

Someone is whining about how hard Git is in an article they wrote. They work for GitHub. The article was posted to HN.

Yes, let's make things so easy a literal baby can do it.

Colleague: We need to deliver it today so let's hardcode some values in the code to make it work
Me: Ok you do it. I don't even want to see it!

I just want to make it clear for all the PMs out there...

If you don't put it in a fucking ticket, or don't mention a feature you want in a ticket, I will not do the work or forget put something into a feature.

Write that bitch up if you want it done.

Saturday night coding to make a deadline for a Wordpress website that needs to launch on monday...

I hate Wordpress!!!! Did I ever mention it?

Ok, now back to work!

I feel so stressed at work right now.

QA signed off on a fix I made, I signed off on a fix I made, and other people signed off on the fix, but it gets out to production and people find it's broken, I get the finger pointed at me.

It's really stressing me out, especially when our client needs custom logic to make their use cases work, and the BE and FE are scrambling to make it work.

It's really affecting the way I work and I don't know what to do. I talked to my boss and he just tells me to "stay positive". Someone please help me.

Tried to make my qr code look fancy, and it didn't turn out well. My guess is the main part of the qr code must be darker than the complementary part?

(The one in the image doesn't work)

Will be offline for few days.
If you see me like/comment to your post or post any rant until next month, please mention me there with "gitlog do your work or you'll not make it"

If only this button could make this shitty work week end & launch me in to paradise. I've had it up to here with PMs, clients, sales and stupid people. Any one else? 😖🙋🏼👋🏼

Can't help but when watch most profiles(some exceptions)of ranters I see are front end developers. Aren't here some guys who work on developing frameworks, work on linux kernels or maybe work on linux distros?

P.S.: I love RoR and will contribute to make it better. So the image.

So my company is now giving us flexibile work hours, but we still gotta do 9 hours a day, of which 1 can be outside the office. Wouldn't it be easier to just make it an 8 hour-day and be done with it?

A quote that I live by:

"Make it work. Make it right. Make it fast."

The first day back to work after almost 2 weeks off...

And Slack is down. Time to make it a 2 weeks + 1 day vacation.

For me its a good night sleep and have a strict rule not to work from home/not-working-location. It will make the window of working time more focused.

Spent half the day trying to make something work. It wasn’t working before I started and I wasn’t making any progress. I don’t know why my changes weren’t working. So I yanked out everything I changed and put it back the way it was before I started. It works now. I don’t know why it works. I give up. 😂

Fuck CORS.
Three hours into trying to make it fucking work... YES BROWSER I ALLOWED ALL ORIGINS WHY DONT YOU WORK 😭😭

So apparently, all IT staff of #ryanair is banned from remote work. Some of them are in Madrid, Spain. I heard a lot about their workplace and how "employee friendly" ther are. But to make "equality" excuse for staying in office cause pilots cant work from home...

I hate android studio. No wait i love it. No i hate it. Can't seem to make up my mind about it. Its slow, kills my computers performance, messy interface. But despite that it's something appealing about it. Everything seems to be avaliable for previewing as one work.. aaand then it breaks my computer and I hate it again..

"we are reluctant to actually make a product roadmap because then we have to stick to it"
- the CEO of the software development company I work at during our last town hall who wonders why our customers are always frustrated with our software...

AAAH, fucking aws. Why the fuck do you make documentation if it doesnt even make sense. I struggeled for hours to let your cock sucking Cognito work and I'm still fucking stuck. Why is there no proper documentation or tutorial available for nodejs. This pisses me the fuck off. I hate this piece of shit.

Ah... I feel better now.

Yeah so I quickly hacked stuff together. Why make it beautiful before I know whether it will actually do? Hack now, refactor later!

Yeah and then that moment in refactoring where main() gets under 700 lines and I don't know whether what I'm feeling is joy or despair. Gaaaahhhh!

At least I have also written automatic tests so that I can see when something breaks.

Modular C is a mess to get to work. It looks really great but it takes sooo looong to make it work...
How do people deal with it?

Make it a trend!
My setup at work!

One little question!
If you build a website, is it necessary to make it also work on IE?
Not so many are using it and i don't see the point. Idk

is it me or you also make a new file of a working code just make and see how new way it will work but end up editing the original file 😭

When you're currently working on a mosule based on Facebook Graph API and the project manager wants you to make it work on Twitter ...

Boss says: Why is our email not working get it to work again.

Me: What the fuck? Only because I am the computer guy does not mean I can make wine out of water.

What other devs fucking hate it when asked to do work in photoshop?

I code get a fucking designer to make it look pretty.

dear ietf-people i want to thank you that tls1.3 is official. i know it was hard work to say just no to the doughbags and preventing that middleware and spyware manufacturers implementing static keys.
to make it short:
Thank you for your hard work

If you have an hard-to-use API, you need a fucking strong documentation. Otherwise, a fucking developer like me will get lost and will spend days and days trying to make it work. Man up that documentation, for God's sake.

started on the new job today, and to be honest I'm a little depressed about the technology we make.
i have this class in college about the history of technology and my professor called technology "the science of productive work". is that all there is? make tools so people can work more? is that all there is to life? it's fucked up if you think about it at all

Today one of the more junior back-end devs told us, that he doesn’t plan to do front-end, because he doesn’t want to make design.

He basically told us that in his view FE devs do design work and that’s it.

What the f**? We have designers for that. Front-end devs are not the ones who make design. Reaaad uupp, boy

You're working on a project, your boss has set you tasks to complete. You complete all the tasks and make pull requests of all the work you've done. Your boss is busy and you don't know what to do next? What do you do? Is it unethical to work on personal projects in work hours, because you're not being paid for that? How do you find other stuff to do?

Why is NetworkManager in Ubuntu so buggy? I really hate it. Makes me even miss Windows. Desktop with random freezes and the super intelligent resolvd can't even resolve shit. So I can't connect to VPN to work, so I gotta reboot a damn Linux machine to make it work. Why this Linux Desktop decay? Why?

I hate front end !

My friend just tried to help me with it and I was happy to be relieved of the shitty work!

He didn't make it responsive ! And now I am back to square 1. 😑

And this boys and girls,
Is how you start doing less work - apparently.

GitHub
Welcome to GitHub Copilot Technical Preview!

We’re thrilled to invite you to start testing GitHub Copilot. Your feedback will help us make it even better.

😎

The moment when your website works in every modern browser but not in IE 7 and downwards but the QM want you to make it work in IE :/

Wouldn't it be kinda cool to have a project section in devRant? Like the collab section but for projects that are finished/work in progress. I'd love to see what people here make and it would be a great way for people to get exposure and feedback on their work.

Rays of hope!
It's not that I'm on vacation, clicked it from office terrace, just that get to enjoy such things when I make progress at my work

@gitlog what are you doing!? Do your work or your not going to make it!

"Make it work, make it right, make it fast"

Thank you Mr. Beck!

Always helps to remember his directive when breaking down a complex problem!

I got a rubber duck that can say what my code is doing wrong! Well, actually it is my brother that just gives me advice on how I can make my code work lol

that time when stuff is buggy, you struggle to make it work then you update the version of package and it works brilliantly

Anyone else test there program or website every like 10 minutes to make sure it works, just to avoid spending half and hour or more coding and finding out loads of things don't work?

Now... I understand 2FA is to make things more secure, and I do appreciate it. BUT can we please work out a damn solution for people who work in an agency for other corporates which only have one shared account across the agency that bundles one phone number or mobile app.

What if people are on leave or sick? I need stupid 2FA to be able to login/work. uhhhhhhh.....

Making a VR app.
It must work with:
- pico VR
- oculus go
- oculus gear
- Android (standard mobile
- iOS

Now, except for iOS they all work with android, which make things way easier.

Now guess where most of the troubles are?

FUCKING IOS, I just fucking believe iOS even inverts the whole fucking textures while using Unity+GVR

WHY THE FUCK DOES IT EVEN HAPPEN?

I have 4 different projects to build 5 different Apps

Fuck my work

I... I just got on the bus to work and left my beautiful contigo coffee thermos at the stop. I'm done guys. I'm not going to make it.. ..

Confession!!

Ohh Lord, Please forgive me. Today I committed a sin and tomorrow I will have to commit it again. I wrote a shitty code and will have to write it tomorrow also. I am so ashamed of myself. I promise, I will refactor the code before releasing it for code review. My excuse for doing the sin is that I want to make it work first, it is little complex. I hope, if someone will stumble on it, then that person will not judge me by few shitty snippets I wrote to make it work.
Thanks,
An embarrassed programmer

If you’re struggling with productivity:
[1] Wake up early & Exercise
Waking up early means getting most of the work done as soon as you start your day. This sets a routine for you.
Doing a high-intensity workout early in the morning can kill laziness and make you feel productive.
[2] Divide the day into three parts
Do the most work in the morning hours i.e 6 am to 11 am.
Keep the 12 pm - 3 pm for work that requires less energy. Evenings can be utilised to finish minor tasks.
[3] Make a timetable
A proper timetable or To-Do is a good way to keep a track of your daily routine.
Tick off the work you've completed and you'll feel you've been productive.
[4] Follow people who motivate you to work
If you waste time scrolling on social media, make sure to follow people who instantly motivate you to work and take action.
[5] Update or shift workspace
Your workspace is where you spend most of your time, so make sure it makes you feel motivated to work.
In case you are bored of your workspace, shift it to a new room, preferably that has windows for fresh air.

I've been meaning to work with the Spotify's Python API 'Spotipy'. Any good suggestions to make anything cool with it? Can include Machine Learning, IOT, etc.

Fuck!
I have overwritten some files that make my WiFi-module work and I can't reinstall it, because that doesn't fucking work!! (Ethernet is also giving up on me😢)

NOW I HAVE TO FUCKING REINSTALL FUCKING UBUNTU, BUT MY LAPTOP WON'T BOOT FROM THE FUCKING USB!!!!

Just started learning Docker. The thing that seemed complex a week ago has started to unwrap the wonders it holds. Hope to make it work to ease up some of the team's deployment headache. Though there were hurdles related to firewall, company intranet, network antivirus, domain sharing etc. But managed to resolve it today.

Am I the only one spending like 70% of my work-time tweeting and the remaining 30% coding like crazy at super fast speed?

And still make it all work super properly :D

Is it sort of silly to work remote, but from a different place (library, shop, mall)?

I've had one remote job in the past, but start another tomorrow and I'm hoping to try to work from different places.

All of the posts of folks with their laptops on beaches, looking at waterfalls, and such make me happy.

So the other day I kept seeing too many of "if it fits, it sits" jokes. It was one of the days I was messing around with my app. So I did something to make it work. I didn't know what and I went "If it works, it twerks". I know it's stupid but I crack myself up every time I say it. 😂

Customer: I literally don't want to do anything make it work.

Support: here is a good video tutorial to get you started

Customer: I don't want to invest anytime in getting anything to work, just make it work.

Arrrrrggggg just use another service

How the fuck do classes work in Python? Why, exactly, do people make them for themselves? I get doing it for like making modules other people will use, but just for your own shit...?

My first computer experience was when I was like 4 or 5 I didn't really understand it yet. My first programming experience was when I was 8. I really wanted to make my own website login system so I copied some PHP code and tried to open it😂. Ofcourse it didn't work.

Me: "You should go with this other option for the software. It's cheaper and you can do more."
Client: "No. This more expensive and less-capable thing I chose is better. We'll make it work."
[several weeks pass]
Client: "This isn't working. Why didn't it work?"
Me: "You have to upgrade to a more expensive plan, or switch to the other solution I told you about."
Client: "No. We'll make it work."
Me: *facepalm*

Today, coworker looked at some code of mine and asked me why I was repeating code and doing things foolishly, I told him I just wanted it to work and would make it pretty after. It felt really good making my code readable after knowing that it already worked.

Do you guys worry about your non disclosure agreements at work? I use my personal computer at work so I do my own projects on the same computer as work but it makes me a bit uneasy. We're a broke startup and I'm lucky to have the job so I'm not going to ask for a computer.

Also, are you aware of it when you make rants- trying not to be too specific? Or are you not worried?

Spend half a day trying to make sound work on my antergos install, after multiple image builds, kernel jumping, reinstalling alsa, realized that people working on making cherry trail laptops sound work - stopped working on it since like april 2017 and new kernels have simply no patch to make it work, great.. debian docs mention that you should be able to use an external soundcard atleast, but the whole alsa and pulseaudio shit doesn't make that easy at all.. atleast the battery time with arch+powertop+tlp is almost the same as what I would get with windows out of it

Finally got Stripe charges to work, then changed it to make subscriptions work in the Django app I was working on for Capstones. At least in theory. Works locally, but hasn’t been merged into our Production branch yet, so there could be something missing.

Still, super happy to have finally crossed it off my mental to-do list.

When I started developing my current Django project, I had decided to go full TDD, do it like a pro. But I stopped after some time, as I spent more time trying to make the website look right than trying to make the backend work, which always seems to work fine. Am I an idiot? I think I'm going to regret it...

The moment you have to boot a ride at work, but it cannot make up it's mind.

where should I start, having something different to work on weekly, being able to work from home, alot of income possibilities, can easily start your own businesses, compared to other jobs a good community, if there isn't something you want made you can make it, and if you can think of an idea for a website or program you can make it.

My tokenizer can how tokenize many statements rather than just a single statement. ^_^ I'll make it open source once I've done a bit more work on it but so far I'm happy.

"You have no good test data, just make sure it will also work perfectly in client environments"

Ok in scenario A we do X, Y, Z, and in scenario B we'll do this other stuff mostly the same but a little different. That will <puts comments> go here ...

Ok let's make A work....

-time / days passes-

Ok we're done and it is ready to go.

-later-

Someone: "Why doesn't scenario B work?"

Me: LOL some idiot .... <copy paste, fiddle, copy paste, fiddle> there we go I fixed it!!!

When you work for a multinational organization that's adopting scrum. We don't swarm, our PO isn't even in the same building, and one of your teammates hates git (loves TFS).

Fake it till you make it I guess?

I've deleted a previous rant because it wasn't appropriate.

My built up frustration is reaching peak levels and I'm aggressive as fuck. -.-

Anyone a non sportive solution to solve anger issues... Cause my brain is producing violent fantasies that would make some parts of crime history look like kindergarten.

It's really everything at the moment:
Corona, isolation, people at work, work at work, weather, health issues and a few more things.

Hella again,
Today i started to work on a new website for one of my friends wich is a photographer, i am quite a beginner and i would like to know what you will you guys recommed as library or language .. i am trying to make a image gallery but i want to make it a bit fancy 🤔

I personally don't have a funny dev sin story (not that I didn't commit any).
My internship colleague should update a value of a row in production. So he wrote a SQL command and forgot the where clause. This was the first time the company tested there rollback mechanism and it didn't work. For the next 2 weeks my colleague was busy updating 2000ish rows to make it work again

For me, it would be Caddy Server

Discovered it while running some researches around GoLang, where I could see that it was really useful when used with Hugo Framework.

It took me something like 10mn to configure it to run (I couldn't believe only 2 lines would make my things work), and 5 more to make it run with Docker and Traefik (another good open source project that I now use everyday).

Now all my projects where I use Docker have Caddy included o/

When - webkit-background-clip does not work with any kind of transition or animation and you're forced to make duplicate div on top of original without it and opacity:0. Just because designer want's quick fade transition.

So, this is a story of an experience a friend of mine had with Android Studio.

As part of our semester, we are required to make an application through Android Studio, and had no previous experience with it. We started to download and install it all which were a nightmare on its own to make it work.

While i got it to work in the end, she encounterred a big issue. Her pc was named after her name, which contained letters android studio did not understand (æ,ø,å) and made it absolutely useless.

After installing and uninstalling multiple times, she ended up making and entire new user called "F#ck Android Studio" just to make it work.

No idea if there was an easier way, but damn its been hell for her

Im 22, serious question...is there a way i could make enough money to retire by 30 and live off of it until im 90? Like there has to be something if i invest in would make me not need to work anymore.

My first ever system... It was bad, no coding standards, no reusing, no pattern, no nothing. I really don't know how I managed to make it work.

Almost finished my project but nothing works, while I was raging I deleted it and now I have 4 days to finish it and make it work
I hate myself

You ever get the feeling that you work with a chisel and there's that one colleague that works with a 16lb sledge hammer?

I'll make a nice elegant fix for a problem, they'll struggle to work with it so pound it with a hammer, I'll come back to it and try to iron out some of the dents...

Proud to say 19 hours straight.

My uni has a infamous course work assignment which took about 27 hours to train on the lab PCs.

The issue was we only had a week to do it. So you had to code it, then run it and make it run first time to have a good time.

As we all know, that’s not realistic and I remember staying up the entire time to make sure I had sufficient time to train it. Was a nightmare but got a good grade.

1) try make it do web requests
2) try make it work as server
if i can do these things with new technology then i can do almost all today software market need. even some css frameworks passes these tests.

When you're the only one who likes docker in your team and they're still insisting on using WAMP/XAMPP. Fixing docker bugs and trying to make it work. Push! This is war!

I thought that if I work for a manager that is a developer as well, I would start getting deadlines that make sense for the project...
Well, now I know that it was just a thought.. guess that It doesn't exist

I FUCKING HATE MICRO$OFT AND WINDOWS SO SO FUCKING MUCH THEY CANT EVEN MAKE UPDAYES WORK PROPERLY IT LKTERALLT JUST MADE MY PC DISPLAY A LITERAL FUCKING RECOVERY SCREEN FUCK YOU MICRO$OFT

Man using Android Studio is a love and hate situation for robotics, just hoping that it will work before competition even though half of the team is riding up my ass about everything just to make the bot work😤

Spent a whole morning trying to make a unit test work only to find out it didn't work because of duplicated code.... Fml

I have a friend that asked me to make an app to interface with Arduino when he realized that I develop Android apps.
The annoying thing apart from him nagging me to make it, is that he still doesn't know what he wants and how it will work...

I like the idea of it but for tech support this won’t work. Ugh I just wish they could make a GUID for every NVR model.

Yeah... Hacking Windows regestry to make it work! Awesome!

I hate weekly demos. Why not wait until something is done and ready to show, and then schedule a show an tell?

Otherwise you're just racing around to get some half-ass, not working rubbish in to make things look good. Yet it probably doesn't work at all, and is filled with technical debt that will make it to production.

for all that WFH : most of us had sex during work hours, does this make us a porn stars?

should I add it to my resume... what else can I put while in this thought field?

Women, software engineers make good boyfriends.

Why?

We're not scared of committing. We do it everyday at work. :P

I'm excited about flutter, looks like it will make cross platform mobile dev more fun.

Also dx12 rtx real time raytracing. It would be cool to work on it at work. We do animations for short movies at work and render times are huge now.

I'm kinda suspicious for both though. Couldn't check it out yet.

"- Hello I work on this shitty Drupal project where the vendor directory is gitted, and we can't use composer becauses it returns error [note: i wish this was a joke]. So I installed a module that won't work, because it needs a depency. I installed it but it still doesn't work
- You need to edit your autoloader
- Ok, what do I put in it?
- Idk, you're not supposed to do it, and let composer do it for you"

Did I ever tell you how the Drupal stack exchange will one day make me turn into a serial killer?

Damn I left work on Friday afternoon with an unsolved problem. I actually solved it on my way home but forgot to make a note so this is now the only thing I can think of. What a beautiful weekend.

My parents know that I work with "codes" in computers to make all sort of things 😁. My siblings have some idea of what programming and software engineering is. They tell me that it is fun (they have tried it), but they still don't value it that much 😕