(Q: How much are you allowed to Google as a developer?)

“You’re allowed to Google as much as you want. This is not school, you’re employed to solve a problem. Nobody cares whether you Google for the answer or remember the answer from another Googling.”

They said I needed to keep my commit messages "PG13".

What they failed to realize is every PG13 movie is allowed 1 instance of "fuck".

Browsing to a porn site while still being in the corporate VPN.
Got a proxy page which said this type of content isn't allowed at work. Nearly had a heart attack ;D

"enter Phone number"
"numbers not allowed"

Finally I have something to rant about.

At university we had lessons in C++.
First lesson: Make a calculator
Second lesson: Make an application that uses sockets to connect to an FTP-server and downloads a file. No FTP-libraries allowed.

Finally sharing my desk! The team is allowed to work in a dark room, the proper environment for developers.

So I’m a web developer at a company.

And I’m not allowed to access the web.

Any advice?

Me wanting to board Plane,
Goes through security Check...
"Sorry sir Laptops are not allowed."
Me
"Why?"
Security
"It could be a modified bomb"
Me
"But this is a Tablet!"
Security
"No sir, it has a Keyboard and Trackpad attached to it, its also running Windows..."
Me
"Excuse me, but this is clearly a Tablet"
*Detatches Keyboard from Surface Book*
"See? Tablet."
Security,
"Sorry sir, but no. You cant board the plane with this, only Tablets and Smartphones"
Me
"WTF? you dont allow Laptops because they could be bombs but A FUCKING SMARTPHONE IS ALLOWED? AND TABLETS TOO?!"
Security
"Yes, because the Battery is not removable..."
Me
"But my Laptop Battery is also not Removable..."
Security
"I dont have anymore Time for an Argument"
Me
"So I can board the Plane?"
Security
"No, the Ticket will be refunded"

WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS BULLSHIT? LIKE RLY? WHO!!
I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK IS ALLOWED?!

You are allowed to be dumb OR to be rude.
Never both.

It's 2017 and you're not allowed to complain about syntax error bugs. Get a proper tool for the job.

We don't use rocks for hammers, and we don't use notepad for coding

(Me using the CMD in class)

Schoolmate: What are you doing?

Me: Using the CMD, it makes stuff really easier.

Schoolmate(loudly): *MY NAME* is hacking the schooooool.

Ignorant idiots now I am not allowed to use my laptop in class anymore.

Creating a new account is always fun...

"This Is My Secure Password" <-- Sorry, no spaces allowed.

"ThisIsMySecurePassword" <-- Sorry, Passwords must include a number

"ThisIsMySecurePassword1" <-- Sorry, Passwords must include a special character

"ThisIsMySecurePassword 1" <-- Sorry, no spaces allowed

"ThisIsMySecurePassword%1" <-- Sorry, the % character is not allowed

"ThisIsMySecurePassword_1" <-- Sorry, passwords must be shorter than 16 characters

"Fuck" <-- Sorry, passwords must longer than 6 characters

"Fuck_it" <-- Sorry, passwords can't contain bad language

"Password_1" <-- Accepted.

I’m legally not allowed to rant about my company but im gonna do it anyway so stay put

"there's a problem with your API"
Me: "why?"
"I get no data"
Me: "what response code are you getting?"
"405 - Method not allowed. But only on the /version endpoint"
Me: "Soo... What request are you sending?"
"POST"

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SEND A POST REQUEST TO AN ENDPOINT THAT **GETS** THE VERSION OF MY API???!!!!

Me: "Read the documentation. It's there for a reason"

Our software department is the only department where swearing in loud voices is allowed .

Says a lot about our department :D

Me: Sitting in beanbag chair in development office, using closed macbook as a plate for a large walnut-brie-honey-rucola sandwich, honey dripping all over the aluminium top.

New manager (well, he's pretty old, but newly hired): "I don't think you're allowed to eat near the computers"

Me: "And I don't think you're allowed in my dev cave".

*Put macbook to the side*
*push him out of the office*
*close sliding door*
*close blinds*
*sit in beanbag chair*
*eat sandwich*
*lick honey from macbook*

I'm sorry, coworkers. Two weeks of writing MySQL queries made me a bit feral.

Tv gold on NCIS: Los Angeles tonight.

Summarised:

Need access to laptop
Laptop has unhacksble security protocols
Laptop gets shot
Damage from being shot allowed them to hack it

Morale of the story. Bullets can damage code.

don't think I'd be allowed this at work, but at home, its an amazing way to release my programming frustrations!

Translation: My Samsung picture app wants to be allowed to make and receive phone calls...

WHY IN THE FLYING FUCK DOES MY STOCK GALERY APP NEED TO MAKE PHONE CALLS????

So, as everyone knows on here by now (or, a lot of ranters), I am a fervid privacy person.

Appearantly a new surveillance law in my country is about to extend mass surveillance/hacking a lot. So here a rundown of what they are about to be allowed to do (stuff that is not okay imo and this is the reason I am so pro-privacy):

- Mass Data Gathering: The intelligence agency over here (lets call it IA from now) can pretty much record everything send through the country.

- Extra Protection: If they want to conduct surveillance on journalists/lawyers, they have to go through extra channels first at least.

- Data/survaillance sharing: The IA is allowed to share their raw/filtered data with foreign intelligence agencies without limits. Also, they're allowed to conduct surveillance based on foreign requests.

- Secret DNA database: A secret DNA database will be created which can store the DNA profiles of any person who has commited any kind of crime. These profiles are allowed to be stored for a maximum of 30 years. This database is allowed to be shared with any foreign intelligence agency.

- Hacking: Unlimited power to hack any device deemed neccesary to hack in relation to crime. From computers to smartphones and so on. Also, it's allowed to use zero-days without reporting them to the vendor (we have seen what can go wrong with that through the ShadowBrokers scandal).

- Automatic Database Collection: They are allowed to directly tap into any database they see required (banks, healthcare, messaging services and so on). Practically this can lead to backdoors being build in because if you don't cooperate, you can go to prison. (mother of god I am not using anything closed source anymore if possible).

So yeah, this is pretty much the reason why I am so privacy consious. This country is fucked.

Happened on my first day in internship :

Me: Hey, I'm not allowed to install anything, could you install me Sublime Text?
Boss: yeah sure, hold on, I'm granting you admin rights
Me: ...

My workstation is suddenly attacked and conquered by the legendry meow and am not allowed to touch it anymore

When i get kids. They are NOT allowed to have online game accounts until the age of 14.

I'll still teach them how the internet works. i'll maybe allow facebook.

kids on the internet and in online games these days are toxic little brats.

A story of the backend dev. from our client:

"I used !important once now I'm not allowed to do frontend anymore :("

Month #1 at CS University. We write C on the terminal, with nano. No vi no ide no highlighting. Neither makefile is allowed. Professors don't know what git is.

I am pissed off.

enabling firewall on a vps to secure my docker containers and forgetting to add openssh to allowed list --> ssh blocked 😃🔫

Went with a cousin to hospital for vaccination .I took a pen and wrote: "Anti-Virus database updated 09.01.2017" . Now I am not allowed to stay with my cousin :(

Our programming teacher always wanted us to do this (in C#):

somedatatype somevarname;
somevarname = somevalue;

You were NEVER allowed to:

somedatatype somevarname = somevalue;

"Can't I just do it in one line?"
"No."
"Why?"
"<insert dumb statement here that gives no reason whatsoever>"

How to quit smoking as a developer, tutorial:
#1: You're only allowed to smoke when every unit test is passing.
#2: ???
#3: Profit

Is it usual to not be allowed to use headphones/earbuds at work?

We cant at our offfice atleast. The explination was that IF clients come by the offfice it looks like we are having a lan party! 😂

I had a teacher telling me I was not allowed to Google in my Android project....

You only get three wishes.
I wish for more wishes.
I can't do that. Only three are allowed.
Sudo I wish for more wishes.
OK, here's more wishes!

Teacher : You are only allowed to use Turbo C in your semi-final project.

RIP cozyplanes 2017

I previously ranted about oauth being unapproachable and incomprehensible. Well, here’s the diagram that allowed me to finally understand it.

Can a person who just likes tech and isn't actually a dev be allowed on devRant?

To IT: I can no longer clone GitHub repos from the command line.

From IT… Hello DevOps engineer…. You’re no longer allowed to use port 22. It’s not safe. All traffic must be port 443.

Really!?

HUGE FUCKING DILEMMA FOR ME.

I will probably get the chance of choosing a company phone soon (as in, next few days).

Option 1: Android - not allowed to root or anything crazy so I'll have a partly open system but with google tracking fully enabled at all times (most probably).

Option 2: iOS - Also not allowed to jailbreak or anything 'weird' but it's entirely closed source. Although no Google tracking shit.

I honestly have no clue what to choose.

Halp.

My boss now has me writing an angular app but I'm not allowed to reuse components. The retard level is over 9000

If slack is down for more than 15 minutes you're legally allowed to leave work

Dear lord spaghettimonster,
pls not another SomethingJS.io for the world!

There should be a limit on how many JS frameworks are allowed to exist at any time!

At some points in my life even I wish guns were allowed in germany...

I drink coffee cause we're not allowed to punch people at work.

Mom: You gave our keyboard a virus with your programming! You're not allowed to use the computer any more!
(the keyboard was 10 years old)

Made advanced tracking system, position, history, speed, allowed areas, warnings, notifications - the whole shabang.

Client is more impressed by form converting hours and minutes into decimals.

Sigh.

Work: You're not allowed flexi time to accommodate your medical conditions

So anyway, I've missed the last 2 days of work because of medical conditions that could have been accommodated by flexi time.

If I spend 50% of my time in meetings, 30% of my time doing things for support/helpdesk which I'm not allowed to automate, 10% as a technical consult and 10% helping other devs... am I even a developer anymore?

Just heard at the coffee machine: "Well, does that mean I'm not allowed to use Trump's quotes to seed the random numbers generator?"

A few weeks into my first dev job, the owner of the company sent out an email directing that we were no longer allowed to use open source software in our web projects.

I didn't stay there very long.

**office**
*knock knock*
Sorry, permission denied: only officials allowed
*sudo knock knock*
*door opens slowly*

Is there a mp4 player on linux than can play in mini view like w10? VLC got a limit on how small the windows is allowed

My therapist tells me I’m not allowed to talk about problems I’ve had with designers anymore. *pops a valium*

Max file size allowed is 10 MB, and this is what I get when I try to upload a 5 MB file. Do I really want to apply here?

I ain't allowed to talk about it :( NDA and all.

How long does my beard have to grow before I'm allowed to code in flip flops?

convinced a friend to join devrant, have to read his every day rants anyway.

he: are you allowed to swear there?
me: are you kidding? THIS IS FUCKING DEVRANT
he: okay i'm in

Having to deal with the "vim guy" in the office, who refuses to believe that people should be allowed to use their editor of choice, and that you are somehow an insuperior developer because you prefer a native GUI.

Due to the legality of it, my lawyer tells me I'm not allowed to discuss it.

My name says enough.

So apparently calling the main() function inside the same main(), without a base case doesn't give an error in C 😑
Why ?!
Why the hell is it allowed ?!

Companies like this should not be allowed to live

So.. we aren’t allowed to share our opinions anymore?

FUCK YOU EXCEL!

Multiple monitors to show multiple sheets at once?
Excel: Not allowed.
FUCK YOU

Open multiple files at once?
Excel: Not allowed, I will only show you one at a time.
FUCK YOU

Multiple Desktops to have multiple setups to easily switch between?
Excel: Not allowed, I'll show you the same spreadsheet on all desktops!
FUCK YOU

FUCK FUCK FUCK

My Data Structures and Algorithms sample midterm exam's instructions mentions "No Morse Code allowed"

When you try to clear term in messenger.

Fuck my life. I shouldn't be allowed to programming before midday.

there was a job I had where we were only allowed to share code by taking screenshots and we made backups by printing off screenshots

>First grade
Teacher: This is a Keyboard, this is a mouse... blah blah blah
Now play Mario!

There was also some space racing game or something installed on the computers. We weren't allowed to play that game, so of course, we did what we weren't allowed to. It was always fun to sneak in a game when the teacher wasn't looking or wasn't around.

We were also taught MS Paint. I "painted" a squirrel in one of the lab sessions, the teacher loved it and showed it to everyone. Everyone applauded and then I became the MS Paint Guru (for them). Fun times..

I enjoy being an embedded software engineer that is allowed to use C for most projects and doesn't have to program JavaScript or PHP nor has to use dozens of foreign libraries.

The headset rule. If put on, project managers, the pope and everyone should stay away the developers. If put on one ear, it is allowed to disturb if it's important. Headset off, party time.

when I ended up catching 400 pokemons from 10 countries while sitting at my desk, makes you wonder what algorithm allowed that

BOSS allowed a last minute change that apparently was barely tested to be merged right before the last release of the year...

BOOM!!!

Me: ... I told you so....

#AgileTip: Hiring smart people is pointless if they aren't allowed to make any mistakes.

I moved from a no-dogs-allowed company to an office with three dogs in.
Forget the better salary, the more freedoms, the nicer boss I have now.
The main benefit is that I get to pet dogs every day now!

As lead developer I was not allowed to implement automated testing as "we don't have time for that" - you have no idea how much time it would save!

Today, the security department stopped our new project and told us to work on the last project instead because of a top-secret security flaw.

Problem is, they are not allowed to tell us what the problem is. FML

!rant

In july chrome will mark all http-pages as not secure and firefox will follow.
Worst of all, those insecure pages won't be allowed to access the microphone and other features any more. What will i do in cafes now?

Boss told us to make a tickets app.

Tickets will have to_be_completed_by date

Devs in our team allowed that to be in the past. Because our manager consistently says he wants stuff done like yesterday!

“Right-click not allowed!” Yeah, right!

Wish this was allowed :D

I was once told by a manager when I gave my notice that I was ungrateful because they allowed me to take vacations [FROM MY LEGAL VACATION DAYS].

Wait what? Nude.js is already a thing?
Yeah great, I'm not allowed to be a creative perv anymore.
Just great.

Patterns 👏 are 👏 a 👏 language 👏 to 👏 talk 👏 about 👏 design 👏 not 👏 a 👏 comprehensive 👏 list 👏 of 👏 the 👏 only 👏 things 👏 you're 👏 allowed 👏 to 👏 do 👏 in 👏 code.

405 method not allowed
*an hour of coding later*
403 forbidden

I think I'm just making it mad...

Am I allowed to use an API from the government that they do not have publicly documented or explicitly said anyone can use BUT don't have any authentication on it?

Today, this made me think: My bank limits the password I can choose to 16 chars, and only letters and numbers are allowed, no special chars. Meanwhile on Typeracer.com I was able to use 60 character password, including numbers, letters and special chars.

Anyone else working from home today? Love that my current workplace has this option.

My previous workplace would have laughed in your face if you even suggested of working at home! Only our bosses were allowed to work from home (surprise surprise?)

Is it allowed to drive to work by bike when you work in IT?

Today is my last Live Coding Exam. Who The F̶u̶c̶k̶ Hug use jsp and mybatis-jdbc mysql connection anymore???!!!

Hugging Shit!

OK @QuanticoCEO
Nobody should be allowed anywhere near a Git client until they have read this book.

So I was told why a bash with Git isn't allowed in my company.

The people that built the development kit (IDEs, tools, etc) estimated that Git wasn't necessary since integrated in Visual Studio.

They clearly never tried to do a pull request or a rebase then. Good to know.

(a coworker gave me a way to have a bash anyway, so that made my day \o/ but rant needed anyway)

!rant

Regional flight Sweden: "Passengers are not allowed to have a Samsung Galaxy Note 7 in their checked in luggage. If so, please inform the cabin crew"

Should one laugh or fear?

The other side of the gun: are you allowed to write proper documentation? Most of the time, I'm not.

Worst thing about being a Dev:

Getting forced by a non dev for a timescale without even being allowed to look at the issue. Then being held to that made up deadline!!

Partly !rant

Another small story about my "teacher".

Today we got told again that we need to develop a personal programming style. I asked him how we were supposed to do that while being restricted by his demands. He tried to justify this with bullshit about how to not declare variables. As i told him that wasn't my point at all he stuttered and couldn't say anything. I got officially allowed to use everything i want! VICTORY SCREECH

(But restricting students on which commands they are allowed to use is still bullshit imho)

Looking at job ads...

"CompanyX is a fun place to work, no downers, egos, pessimists or jerks allowed."

Welcome to the wonderful world of optimistic ego-less uppers!

Work at a banking software company, one bug allowed bankers to book a deal after quote expired. So i could theoretically buy something at yesterday's rate. Dev forgot the "btnBook.enabled=false"

When I was dealing with depression he allowed me to code whatever and get to school when ever (and still got the required hours)

Best teacher / mustache from my dev education

UX quiz:
a) trim whitespace characters from credit card or bank account input
b) refuse transaction, show error message: "no spaces are allowed in the card number"

Came across this sorting function in JS, should it be allowed?

Don't Talk about PRIVACY if u have installed Facebook App with all permissions allowed.. 🙄🙄

Reading about Lua, see this:

"Lua arrays are 1-based: the first index is 1 rather than 0 as it is for many other programming languages (though an explicit index of 0 is allowed)."

*close tab*

Computers are allowed to work remotely from their server rooms in the cloud but people are enforced to go to office.

Computers are superior to humans

internet connection "speed" in Germany might be the reason why so many people still queuing up on the roads on their way to an office despite being allowed to work from home at least in theory

Found this gem today (and there is not anything else defined as "any") WTF are you kidding me? Some people should not be allowed to program

Finally, this old lady is allowed to retire.

I need someone to make me a list of things I am not allowed to say and who I’m not allowed to say them to at work. This is getting ridiculous. Every time I turn around someone is making this face at me 😬 and saying “Don’t say that to that team” or “Don’t say that to this person”. I can’t do my work right if I have to keep censoring myself on everything people find organizationally sensitive.

Are you allowed to wear shorts and flip flops to work? or is it suit and tie?

When is the point where you aren't allowed to touch your own AI anymore?

When it's capable of speech?
When it shows emotions?
When it becomes self aware?

When does it stop being file deletion and start becoming murder?

Interesting thing. Ya know how when turning on your phones hotspot it has to verify that you are in fact allowed to use a hotspot. Well if you have Unlimited Data like myself, hotspotting is not allowed. HOWEVER, if you spam the hotspot button, it after several tries, gives up and lets you hotspot. THIS IS MY LITTLE TRICK. NO BUG BOUNTY. BESIDES, youd need my carrier.

Rant !dev

Come on.... That's just misleading... Shouldn't be allowed to put that in fine print... That requires pressing View Details to see...

OTOH... Incognito...

Day started out great. In the middle of developing an app, we had to evacuate due to bomb threat, and now we're not allowed to go home. A moped with explosives, mixed with nails had been found. Fml

Password guidelines...

Just got an online account for an insurance:
Allowed characters for password are a-z, A-Z, 0-9.
Really?
I tried special characters, maybe they just forgot to mention them. Doesn't work, "Password not valid".

Diffie–Hellman key exchange is not allowed in this area. For your convenience, an SSL stripper was placed on to every near network.

If you weren't allowed to be called a developer/engineer/etc, what would you choose to call yourself?

Code ninja/wizard/monkey?

Hacker?

Techie?

Adding "my house manager is a bitch" to the pile of ongoing issues.

My studio is right in front of the courtyard. Which means students partying and I don't get any sleep. So this morning I asked her if I could swap places with another student. She is a broken record. "It's not allowed" is all I hear from her every time regardless of whatever I ask. And as she says, there are new rules and I am not allowed to get a new contract within the same fuckin building. Her own daughter lives in the quiet area, so like, what's with the double standard?

She's lying and I know that. I asked her to put me in touch with her bosses or "owners" as she calls them, and guess what she said; "it's not allowed" 🙄

Anyways, I don't wish her well. I'll eventually find a way out of this expensive silverfish-infested building.

!rant

I asked my teacher if i would be allowed to use lists in final exam. (If you read my last rants about him you'll know he has a fetish with arrays) He allowed it! I'm feeling so relieved!
(He changed his mind more than once for the last few weeks, but this time he made a clear decision and he will stick with it. He even promised it.)
No more fear now, I know I can do that 😁

Wasn’t even allowed to take off his gown. So sad

I have officially lost my wallet with all my cash cards, driving license, e-card, article-50 "you're allowed to stay in our country" card and my office access key.

How's everyone else's day going?

Now the real question is are you even allowed to put React in your cv if you've never worked with redux, don't know the concept of HOC and still make pull requests with componentWillReceiveProps ?

My dream is to one day work on something and be allowed to finish it instead of being toss on new project every 2 days...

Hey... I've been selected for Microsoft as an SDE :)
Am I allowed to work on a Macbook at MS instead of a windows notebook?! 🤔

Just had a CS test.

I absolutely annihilated my hand and those questions. It went so fucking well. I was allowed to take pictures of my answers to check if they were correct at home. I’ll include them here.

I have this web development course(on the university), and we are not allowed to use javascript. Only php, html and css. FML

Why is there so muche hate on PHP, and what should one use instead? 🤔

Can we ban emojis from devRant?

It almost feels like twitter when scrolling through the rants..

There is only 2 that should be allowed: 🤟and🖕

I just got a job as a "Web designer", but I've quickly learned that my job duties involve installing theme forest themes for clients and sticking to the template. I'm not allowed to write my own code. ever. uuuuuuuuggggghhhhhh

One of my favorite old jokes:
If you wish to know who rules you, seek those whom you're not allowed to criticize… We should rise up against children with leukemia!

this lil guy right here. there was a time when we're not allowed personal stuff on our desks, and i needed a rubber duck for rdd. so i made this lil guy. he's really gr8 at debugging

Holy shit stain, an under) today it was discovered that an underprivileged university scholarship student had accidentally received an allowed of 14mil instead of 1.4k over 8 months she spent 800k of it.

I am not sure what confuses me more, the fact that it took a company 8 months to realise 14mil was missing or the fact that a person was stupid enough to believe they allowed to spend that mistake, yet be smart enough to be accepted into university.

I'm not allowed to talk about the coolest things I've done :(
NDAs always ruin the fun!
But I can tell you that they were freakin awesome. I'll come back to this in a bunch of years :)
Just know it was awesome!

So fallout 76 gameplay is allowed to be released to the public by creators and there is Google hardware stuff going on... This is going to be a tough week for my news feed ladies and gentlemen

I understand we are devs and allowed to wear what we want to a certain extent, but why must people wear flip flops. I don’t want to see/smell your feet for 8 hours

Fuck CORS.
Three hours into trying to make it fucking work... YES BROWSER I ALLOWED ALL ORIGINS WHY DONT YOU WORK 😭😭

I noticed Facebook allowed vim keys navigation, I didn't realise this until I had scrolled through at least half a dozen posts.

Today our webdev prof: "you must use bootstrap! You are not allowed to define your own classes!"

He's a nice guy, but I don't like frameworks, especially if they rely on other frameworks so much that you basically have another language.

Non technical Co-founder comes up with some batshit crazy idea and says it’s Agile because he thinks that means you’re not allowed to argue with it.

Dumb people are dumb.

My boss just upgraded our customer support level with a company we depend on, but I'm not allowed to use any of our 40 allotted phone support hours for "code questions" because "we might need them for something later on".

That moment you are forced to use Windows to develop PHP Stuff and arent allowed to install Linux because of "Company Regulations" (aka Windows only Admins) ...

I just want my beloved Linux Dev Stack here :(

Why are programmers not allowed in the Intensive Care Unit?

Because they like to turn stuff off and on again

Nothing beats beeing allowed to pick when i come in for work. Also today is pretty chill. Building is halv empty and i only have to write a lil documentation for kubernetes :D

300 fucking people.

and only 120 are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING while everyone else can go fuck themselves in a COMPUTER SCIENCE COLLEGE

why is this restricted so much

why such a small amount of people are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING

are you telling me i sacrificed my time and wasted 2 years of my life on college because i wanted to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING, just so i can go fuck myself after 2 years?

someone explain this to me

this is unacceptable

Does DevRant count as social media? I don't think I'm allowed to post to social media while I'm at work. *Asks DevRant anyways*

These are the rules that apply to all of my JS projects:
- 100% typescript, “any” is not allowed
- strict prettier with pre-commit hook
- no semicolons
- no braces around single argument of an arrow function
- tabs

Best part of my internship is that I am allowed to hear music anytime and I can wear smart casual dresses.

My company chose to go with MS Teams over Slack. And now we’re not even allowed to create our own channels. We have to ask our manager to do it for us. Tf? That’s some basic shit.

To devs who work-
Are pajamas allowed at work?
I think that the people who have to personally talk to clients should have a presentational dress code.

I remember I couldn't compile a clean Xamarin Forms project on Visual Studio because of a System.TimeZoneInfoNotFoundException. The workaround?, changed my time zone to Central time USA-Canada. So apparently it is not allowed to use Xamarin in the third world...

Happy Holidays Everyone 😘. Hugs & Kisses to all of you this season. No work allowed - treat yourself.

Made my Final Year Project report without copying stuff from internet. Get's 79% in plagiarism check whereas only 20% is allowed for us. Fuck! I should have just copied stuff from internet instead >:(

IT decides to update machine policy today;

Chrome becomes an "officially" allowed program, so they force a homepage, disable all extensions, and disable incognito... Nice.

Postman doesn't work either.

Fine! If I’m not allowed to make improvements to the site, I’ll blatantly write you shitty code and continue to fuck you over for the future. I tried to help but you guys are fucked.

I can have a tiger now. But I can't seperate from my fat black cat. 😭😭😭😭

I allowed my previous employer to move me from a developer position to a support role and I didn't even complained about it.

"Refractor this method to reduce its Cognitive Complexity from 110 to 15 allowed."
*Pan*

Ok let's do it :

label : for(....) {
if(...){
for(.....){
If(...){
....
break label;
}
}
}
}

*Pan Pan*

As if I took a break, and I am not working.
Now I work on the weekdays, work on the weekends.. and I am not allowed to give myself a week’s holiday.
What’s going on!?

The only electronic device called Alexa that is allowed near me is a professional camera made by Arri. Approach me with some other Alexa device and my bodyguard will tase you.

I used to wipe server data before avery update because i had population script for product.

One time i wiped data and had not remembered that we had allowed users to register in the previous release

I now take backups seriously

This hack is totally shameless. I quit smoking a couple years ago just to start vaping. And I always was allowed to vape at my office desk.
No stressballs Jedi this needs.

I got my dev ducks in recently (React, C++ and C#) but brought them to work before I took pictures and now I can't show you guys because I am not allowed to take pictures at work.

Believe me, I have them.

I don't get why annotations are even allowed for local variables.

Reflection doesn't even work for local variables.

What's the entire purpose to annotate!!!
Am I missing something!!!

I think there should be a technical exam before you are allowed to open up your own Dev shop

when your boss says "we are bringing in testers but the dev team is not allowed to talk to them" O.o !

Password must include at least one uppercase letter, lowercase letter, number, and symbol ~!@#$%^*-&;?+_. No other types of characters are allowed.

Wait since when has the default windows IIS tools allowed for custom subdomains on localhost?!

So I've been swapping out all my code for no reason...

Who else around here just realizes he spent more time debugging other people's shit than actually developing in a year of work, and thinks that this shouldn't be allowed?

(cf my last rant)

Are we allowed to advertise our apps, websites, games we program on here? I'm just curious..

crap... was about to curse Windows for randomly rebooting again to install some noncritical update...

But guess I'm not allowed to do that anymore...

Is there any documentation on what is public API or not?

@dfox or is reverse engineering the calls allowed?

My company wanted to move old desktop applications to web and use angularJS. Finally, "new" tech. Not allowed to use node and Mongo because maybe someone who joins the Web team don't know Javascript and only sql experience ... Time to dust off my CV

He was my senior and we were the only developers in our startup company. He doesn't liked flex or sass, so he never allowed me to use them which could make my life easier.

Found a use for my stickers (not allowed to use on my work laptop)!
Can now tell the difference between mine and my partners when we play Pokémon GO. 🙃

My college taught CS on Windows 7.

You weren't allowed to install things either.

And students only used GUI programming environments.

Had a thought, what if after 10k ++s users were allowed to upload an image as their avatar? Just an idea.

Taking mandatory corporate compliance training that says what things I am not allowed to do...

BUT it's actually quite interesting because I never knew you could do these and well it's starting to give me ideas....

We are working on an AngularJs 1.x project for a long time now. Maybe we’ll use it forever because we will never be allowed to rewrite the whole app with much timely tools 💆🏻‍♀️

In a corporate world...apparently having open communication and sharing opinions is only allowed between ELDERS(bade log)😑

My computer science professor didn't allowed to sit me in class when I reached just 5 mins late..He always closes the door of the class as soon as he enters..how rude?Give me suggestions what should I do?

Only one rant allowed every 2 hours.........

I have dual boot windows 10 and Ubuntu but some time when I using Ubuntu writing permission is not allowed on NTFS disk and some time it does Why???

Question & Android

Is there a way on android to limit what apps are allowed to use mobile data and what are only allowed to use wifi?

why is this allowed

usually it installs in a bootloader env

Getting all the shitty half-broken stuff because you're 'just a contractor'...

...and not being allowed to use your own top-of-the-range stuff due to 'data security policies' 😧

Is devRant allowed in China?

People who freak out and think they have been hacked when you send a message to them on the prod server using the wall command should not be allowed SSH access.

To all devs that aren't allowed to BYOD, what Specs has the PC/Laptop your company provided?

Mine:
i7 3rd gen
IGP
16GB of RAM
500GB HDD in RAID1
and two 27" FullHD Screens

My job college exam.
It's my favourite because it was a fucking joke sheet.

They allowed us to use all our previously gained knowledge which we had stored on our laptops.

Needless to say the exam was over in about an hour.

Non technical bosses managing technical people should never be allowed. It'd be like if the head chef at a restaurant only knew how to cook Lean Cuisine, but bossed around all the other chefs on how they should do their job.

So the university computer science lab computers run Oracle Solaris 11.........and we not allowed to use an ide to write out Python scripts ,gonna use nano

don't know if I'm allowed to post twice for the same weekly rant, but my favorite reaction was when my senile neighbor responded with "Oh that's nice! Computers are all over the place like stink on shit these days"

I could work from home sometimes, the coworkers would be cool but focused, new tech would be encouraged and pms would defend devs against crappy clients, oh and no windows allowed, yeah I dont like sunlight (like linus house)