- Sir, you must put away your laptop before the flight takes off.
- Is a tablet okay?
- Yes
- *Uncouples keyboard from Surface*
- ಠ_ಠ
- (⌐■_■)

User:"It's not working"
Me:"Have you turned it off and on again?"
User:"Yes"
Me: goes down there, system uptime is 360days...
"How do you turn it off?"
User:"by pressing the button on the monitor

This is by far the best please turn off your Adblock I have ever seen. I actually paused my ad blocker 😂

IoT is when your ai powered toaster is mining bitcoin to pay off its gambling debts it has with the smart fridge.

Typical paranoia's when developing a website
- what if the user has JS turned off ?
- what if he is using the site without a monitor ?
- what if the user's electricity is off ?
- what if there's no user ?

When @dfox and @trogus scroll through their devRant feeds, is it considered slacking off at work, or properly debugging their software..? 🤔

An iPad Pro is totally better than a computer.

Can I code on that piece of fuck? No? Fuck off.

Off course Linux is much better

It's off-putting that
( ) ( )
isn't a palindrome, but
( ) ) (
is

‘The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.

This is a picture of my code when my computer is turned off.

is it just me or do these white background icons piss anyone else off?

Math: the imaginary unit is i.
Electrical engineering: no, it's j.
C hacker: hands off my loop variables!

Graduation is tomorrow and I get to decorate my cap...

I felt really mean sawing off the I/O but it weighed too much.

*Gets out of bed*
"Where the fuck is my phone?"
*Aggressively yanks covers off bed*
*Thud*
"Found it" :)

I accidentally taught my cat to turn off the wifi. Now he is using his powers against me whenever he demands food😅😫🤦

"The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit." - Anonymous

"The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit." ~ Anonymous

2 devs in the office:
- Man, Stackoverflow is down. :/
- Time to take a day off ...

*sees that the high voltage generator kit got delivered today*
Cool, let's build this thing and integrate it into my old bugzapper! Mosquitos beware 😈

*starts building the kit, all is going very well*
Oh wow, isn't it Monday? But it's taking only 15 minutes of soldering and everything goes super smooth.. what divine power is giving me such good luck?

Alright, last thing, the transformer and then this circuit is done!!!

*solders in the transformer without realizing that the wires are coated, and the solder isn't protruding through*
Fuck. Time to desolder this shit and blast the wires with my lighter to flash that coating right off!

*engages solder pump and solder goes off extremely easily, because it only adhered to the pad*
*takes off transformer*
Me: "Nnngh..!!! Get off you piece of junk!!!"
Transformer: "Hmph!! I will stay in here no matter what!"
Me: "Get the fuck off already!!! 😡"
Transformer: *leads break off* "Alright, but these leads stay here!!!"
Me: "MotherFUCKER!!!"

Yep, it's Monday after all.

"Have you cleared your cache?" is Internet for "Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Dude chaining in JavaScript is so fucking ugly but so trendy.

thing.doStuff().doThing().then().doMoreStuff().orDont()

Like fuck off with that.

The best thing about a BOOLEAN is even if you're wrong, you're only off by a bit.

That moment when your password is constantly rejected and you realize that the fucking NUM LOCK IS OFF.
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
(⌐■_■)–︻╦╤─ 💻

The trend of referring to staff you just laid off as “alumni” is fucking stupid.

So is emailing and asking said recently laid off staff to join an “alumni committee” that involves, among other things: going to off sites and community events that the company will almost CERTAINLY be using for recruiting photos and “Best place to work” blog posts.

Just send me my final pay and fuck off already.

....

I give up trying to write this.
I'm just too fucking pissed off.

My interactions with my micromanager make absolutely no sense -- she is clearly just trying to piss me off and blame me for everything, facts and reasoning be damned.

I tried detailing this week's examples (there are lots, and it's fucking Tuesday), but. screw it.

Fuck working for (and with) her.
She's a bitchface and a thundercunt.

I'm updating my resume and fucking off out of here.

God fucking damnit i hate her.

So a hosting site popped saying here is some discount. I inspected element. Found the script and got an additional 70% off.

I see everyone is showing off rubber ducks. Now I wonder if my pokemon can do the same trick?

Well the Google part is a wee tiny bit off, but basically Facebook.

Pulling my hairs off because a file is not being executed in the server.

Later realized I didn't even upload the file :(

The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.

My morning is starting off with a 40,000 line code review of a php project....yeah how's your morning going??!??!!??

And in one foul swoop I am unemployed with bills due, an engagement ring to pay off and medical shit... This is fine

”Can’t you install the new update while the computer is turned off?”

Things I hear at work..

For those of you retards that post shit like:

"fuck"

"well I hate this"

or similar shit that only you understand in the hopes that someone goes and asks you what is wrong: fuck off with that attention seeking bullshit.

Seriously, even it your shit is tech dev related, just fucking post it you attention seeking shitstain.

Or fuck off all together from the app to begin with.

!rant

Boss challenged me to get something done before a demo and he'd give me tomorrow off paid. I completed the task on the time and at the end of the day told him I was leaving for another position. He was totally calm, cool, professional and still gave me tomorrow off paid. I don't know how that happened. Life is good.

Woohoo! Fire alarm is going off!

"Have you cleared your cache?"... Is my version of: "have you tried turning it off and on again?"

Current project has a ridiculously high amount of formal requirements

Two of them literally are
• the system shall have an “off” state
• the system shall be in the “off” state if no power is supplied

Boy do I have just the solution for you!

LOL the company I'm at is using an image off of Google images as their logo. Classic!

Accidentally left an AWS RDS connection open overnight

I finally understand those memes about how AWS is paying for what you forgot to turn off

I told everyone that the next day is off. Everyone took it seriously and nobody showed up.

While everyone else is showing off 1tb of RAM, this is what 295 exabytes of storage looks like:

Me: *screwing around in inspect element*

Friend: Woah dude what hacking app is that, can you like turn off the lights

Me: *walks off into the distance*

So I have been working at the same company for five years, doing pretty much all the IT stuff. Sys admin, help desk, you name it. I've also developed a fair amount of in-house software for the company.

Today, I learned from a trusted source that they are actively interviewing people to replace me. I probably have a week, maybe two until I'm fired. To my knowledge I've done nothing to warrant this.

I've been looking around lately for a new job anyway, but without any sense of urgency. I have put in several applications with very few responses though.

I have 5 years experience doing this professionally and 15 total years of dev experience, but only a GED.

I'm not sure why I'm not getting any responses from my applications, but I'm pretty scared right now. I have a 5 month old baby, a wife and a teenager that all depend on me.

I don't know what to do...

Rate my set-up!
Is this still a thing?
I just wanted to show off a little anyway.

I'm in my second call from hell today. Passed off first to a teammate to run a meeting. First one started 10 hours ago, this started 5 hours ago. Neither are related. Neither show signs of resolving.

Other teammate is on the same call that started 2 days ago.

Who the hell pissed Murphy off?

Manager: You know you really shouldn’t pay off your mortgage faster than you absolutely have to. It’s the cheapest money you’ll ever get!

Dev: I’d rather work towards being debt free. Besides my RRSP (401k) is already maxed out

Manager: RRSPs are a scam! TFSAs (Roth IRAs) are way better

Dev: My TFSA is maxed out too

Manager: 😡 You still shouldn’t pay off your mortgage!

Dev: …

The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.

STOP TURNING THE LIGHTS OFF WHEN YOU LEAVE THE OFFICE TOILET!!!!

For fuck's sake, do not turn the lights off if you're not sure if someone is in there or not. Don't be a moron.

Is it okay for me to get pissed off because the interns don't know how to indent the code?

Dear Colleague who ended a call I overheard today with the sentence "I'm off next week, if there is anything - anything! -, call me on my mobile phone!". Fuck you. If you value your work more than your family, that's not only your problem. You're fucking my clients expectations, too. I don't think you're a hero. You're a moron.

I chose my Linux distro based off how friendly the UI looked.

This is how to commit dev suicide.

* Shows off the site I'm woking on *
- Friend: Oh yeah, CodeIgniter is such a great thing.
- Me: Did you just assume my framework?

A very dear friend decided to teach his kids programming. He has six kids but he is only teaching 3 at the moment cause the other 3 are still too young. While I choose to start off my daughter with JavaScript he choose to start off his kids with C. His reasoning is its better to learn at that level to fully understand what is actually going on. And I find myself agreeing with him.

I think: "please send us an email"
is a polite way of saying
"please fuck off and don't call again".

May be I'm wrong 🙄

Black is the new dark.

There. I had to vent that off. It sounds so catchy.

On other news I got my stickers!!! Wohooo!

Slacking off is fun

You know a company is ripping you off when they charge £79 for a fucking charger and it breaks in 1 year. Fuck you Apple

It’s not a bug – it’s a feature
— A feature that cannot be turned off is a bug.

I dont even know what gradle is but based purely off of the rants on here I'm never going to use it.

Come in to work to find my PC is off, power cut in the night. Now I need to reload everything.
#DeveloperProblems

The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit!

It's near enough 1 AM right now.

So will someone please explain to me why my thick shit of a housemate is cooking burgers WITHOUT OIL and setting the FUCKING FIRE ALARMS OFF, WHEN HE KNOWS I CAN NEVER SLEEP AND HAVE TO BE UP AT 4.30.

If they go off again, I'm pressing his face against the frying pan

Yes I know that there is a promise lib for swift, fuck off

Java is like Alzheimer's, it starts off slow, but eventually, your memory is gone.

This is how one must hand-off on call duties! 😝

Those managers who think that Microsoft is the only platform and believe that Linux is insecure - fuck off. I don't want to use azure, you ass.

My refresh button on my mouse is coming loose and is about to fall off, how dare this £11.99 mouse not last for upwards of three years, it's an outrage!

Me: have you tried turning it off and on again?

Customer: oh come on, is that the best you can do!

M:ok how about we
clear all active memory,
Reset the firmware parameters
run system diagnostics and
reinitialise the basic input output system?

C: Wow .. yeah how do we do that?

M: turn it off and on again!

Having me delete something is not fucking urgent and is not a fucking reason to blow up my fucking phone after I'm off. Holy fucking shit.

One thing that really pisses me off about windows 10 is that it randomly reverts default PDF program to Edge!!!111111111one!!111

Hardest part about studying for itil is idgaff. I want to start CISSP and CCNA. Also, someone is in "my" spot in the library, so I'm thrown off

I feel this is more of a show off, and lacks good creativity, but seeing young Kurt there made me excited

The only documented case that “have you tried turning it off and in again” is confirmed not to work

My company changed its policy to not let off days carry over into the next year. How the fuck is this shit legal.

Yeah, sex is nice, but have you ever cleared off your desk?

Ok so maybe not a full rant but it really pisses me off that the version number for Visual Studio 2015 is 14.0

Why focus is important.

Mr Miyagi:
"wax on"
"wax off"

Enterprise IT manager:
"wax on"
"have a meeting"
"wax dried during meeting"
"wash off"
"wax on"
"have another meeting"
"have a meeting bookending that meeting"
"wax baked on by sun"
"get out sander to remove dried wax"
"ruin paint"
"try to spot fix"
"have another meeting"
"paint is the wrong color, won't come off"
"throw it wax, start a new project"
"pay vendor to repaint car"

It is now safe to turn off your computer. 😂

You ever just get pissed at everything?

I find myself wanting to pick a fight about everything today. Little stupid things just setting me off. Just rage...

My head also a feels a bit fuzzy. Also tinnitus is fucking loud today.

Fuck off world!

Testing in a production environment is like closing a door in a to kill a snake and electricity goes off 📴

Last week I got assigned to an important AND interesting project!

Today I got a raise!

2019 is starting off nicely :)

Yes LinkedIn, the middle of a pandemic is the perfect time to make a career move.

Turn off your marketing campaigns assholes!

devRant gross truth time: the garbage can at my desk is used exclusively to dispose of boogers and chewed off fingernails.

We are required to use corporate SSO for any authenticated internal websites, and one of the features they require you to implement is a "logout" button.

They provide a whole slew of specifications, including size and placement/visibility, etc. They provide an SSO logout URL you must redirect to after you take care of your own application logout tasks.

Makes sense... except the logout URL they provide to serve the actual SSO logout function broke over 3 months ago, and remains non-functional to this day.

Apparently I'm the first person (and perhaps one of the only people) who reported it, and was told "just not to worry about it".

So, we have a standing feature request to provide a button... that doesn't actually work.

Corporate Security - Making your corporation _appear_ more secure every day...

I’m tryna be like this but the most I can do is turn off my phone at 8pm

Programming on a train is always interesting. I expect a minimum of one dirty/confused look off a member of the public.

The best thing about a Boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.

Is this here your bloody fucking diary?!

Then maybe back the fuck off to Insta and Fagbook commercials Stockholm syndrome circle jerk. Right where your mind is at ease.

WHERE THE FUCK IS THE NO BUTTON?

NOW GO FUCK OFF AT THE CORNER OF MY SCREEN

Just arrived in Sydney 2 days ago and reported for work yesterday. I looked at my laptop's clock and it said its 4:40pm. Cool! Another 20 min and I'm off.

I started fiddling around with my machine settings and noticed my Location setting is off. I switched it on. My time is updated to 2:43pm.

MOTHERF****!!!

Every day in Support....

Turn your pc off and on please...
Is the cable plugged in....
Is this really your pc...

So it turns out that one of our systems is so fucking old that its Log4j is off the hook. What they say of blessings being disguised as curses is real.

Being a programmer is like being Nic Cage characters.

Some days you're kicking a bear in the gut, others you wanna rip your own face off

The civil war is about to kick off here...

Off the leetcode charts mfuckers!! See how the fastest on the chart is 116 ms? Lol

!rant
If you don't even know what MySQL is, fuck off and let me do my job. Don't insist that you can't find the solution to the problem. That's why I'm here. Your incompetence and persistence are slowing me down and if you really want your stuff to be done on time, don't even dip your fingers into my codes. I know you may think that I need help, but your help is useless if you have zero knowledge and can't even understand the solutions given in stack overflow. I'm fine doing this on my own, so fuck off. Just. fuck. off.

everybody in tech who got laid off: "remember your employment is just a business decision"

yeah, no shit

though you all were smart engineers

Most Softwares is written like an onion.
the more layers you peel off, the more you want to cry

Copy editors are essential. This is what happens when you lay them off.

I have a neighbor with a really annoying car alarm.

It went off at 2am.

It’s not the first time it’s gone off in the middle of the night (though sometimes it goes off in the middle of my work meetings; variety really is the spice of life).

I can’t go back to sleep once I’ve woken up (doing so, like, always results in getting a migraine).

I am so tired.

Took some time off with the Mrs for our crotch goblin's first birthday and it was wonderful. I properly switched off for the first time since he was born, barely touched a keyboard, went outside, slept. I felt great.
But Jesus H Christ trying to get my mind back into work mode is a slow and difficult process. More coffee please.

When some random Assembly code I got off the OSDev Wiki actually booted on real hardware. This is where I'm meant to be.

Me:So you develop android app?
He:Yup
Me:How cool is Hotswapping in 2.0
He:No, I use Phonegap
Me: *walks off*

Some motherfucker pulled the entire fucking Lodash library off a CDN so he could use one fucking function.

Buddy, the library is open source, you can just copy the relevant code off Github

This is why websites are slow as fuck, devs import shit they don't need

Unemployment..
Learned tons about physics, chemical bindings, chemistry, and so on..
Even stuff like math behind music.

Having some time off is really valuable..

When all you want to do at the beach is dig a mine, you know it is time to lay off Minecraft...

back off guys. Android Studio is fucking

Python is where it's at.. you know... you should take this TreeHouse course... Fuck off!

So am mainly a backend developer , my friend called me asking if I can hack someone phone ..!
I asked him if the phone is in the same wifi network as urs. Then maybe there is a possibility .. he said : " I only have the phone number . And also the phone is switched off .. I keep calling it and it's always off .. "
I told him .. : dude if I can hack a switched off phone ! We wouldn't be friends.. !!!! 🤭🤭

DevRant is so purely dedicated to ranting that if one has to talk about coding and development, he/she should tag it "off-topic".

1. Going off topic is rewarded with a lap around the office building
2. Second time, two laps
3. Disqualified, try again next week

Somebody made a mistake
Nobody reviewed that shitty shit
And thus
Things are now broken
Which is great for a friday afternoon, off course 😂

Ok, so I have turned off all shit of Windows Update, and somehow, Windows is updating all apps, and even trying to update itself.

WHY???????????????????

When companies pass themselves off as AI but it is really just profiling.

Did some freelance work off the books and now the guy is threatening to sue me .. nice

Two day off from the deadline, stressed asf- haven't really slept in two days and client is becoming impatient... My back hurt.

is it just me or chrome ripped off firefox's design

Deadline not met, manager blames and go off on all developers. They think development is easy.
Fuck you

Me: Ok google
Google assistant: your mic is turned off

The first day back to work after almost 2 weeks off...

And Slack is down. Time to make it a 2 weeks + 1 day vacation.

first off, i think this may be out of scope but either way.

i think along the rants, a tag seperated section for programmer tips could be pretty neat :)

i'll start off, my tip of today would be: if it seems too complex, it probably is.
consider refactoring by splitting into multiple smaller parts or even its own seperate API. :)

Sure we cannot release untill all the micromanagable fuckery is fucked beyond recognition...

Fuck off already

someone needs to try to build something that is really like windows but build off linux

Sometimes norwegian black metal can come off as a fanboi intercepting a discussion about database technologies and which is better suited for different purposes...

You know who is pathetic? People who turn off comments after they get negative feedback on something they posted

What is your least favorite Website "feature" ?

Mine is those off page menus that slide in from the side. They lag like crazy and freeze the entire site. God forbid if click the menu button more than once. Forbes places comments on the off page sidebar which is just pure hell.

Typescript is a bit like putting lipstick on a pig..

That's it

Well ok PS damn kids get off the grass damnit

You know what pisses me off? When I don't know what a constant is used for so I check the documentation and this is what I see:

Management is wondering why development and IT are taking the day off.

Happy Switch Day!

Boss: How is your day going?

ME: Fuck off!!!

Enough said...

I am so pissed off

I am so fucking pissed off

So much Fucking pissed off from all the shit thats going around with fucking people

Almost one seems to fucking respect you when you are broke

Everyone says they want to help you but when it comes to taking that action to actually help then everyone has got a new excuse

Fuck you

fuck YOU

My blood is so fucking boiling right now that i am going to explode of fucking writing code

So much fucking vicious fury insideme

Hhhhhhhh

Those who make money off of side program/business/website, what is it and what is your best advice about side hustles?

Really Apple?
Are you kidding me?
And btw, why does my 1 year old battery only last 4 hours, when the phone is turned off?

mini rant

So I finally started toying around C#.

As much as I tried to avoid it, as much as I wanted, well, sometimes there is need. I was laying it off and laying it off...

There are some things that well.. aren't my taste but whatever.

But come on why the fuck I cannot delete explicitly?

What do you mean "just assign it to null and GC will eventually kill off that instance"

No, I want that fucker to die here and right now. Like in good ol' C++.

Epic fail. I use a sleep timer in my music player and it occasionally fails to stop and clear the actual timer. It even perpetuates through when I actually turn off my phone, which is rather quite impressive. This is what I find when I turn my phone back on after the weekend. I don't even know how it's possible to have still been going when my phone is off... 🤔

When I'm going camera off you can assume this is the vibes

Pretty sure my UK company is about to pay off all of development and outsource to Romania

Fuck off OneDriveSetup.exe, nobody asked you to install anything. This "i7" is only dual-core, and I need both of them to run my code, kthx.

Wish you devRant family a very happy new year, my new year resolution for the year finally start working on my side project which I have been rolling off for the last 2 years, this is the year I finally start and finish it off.

Me: Bluetooth not connecting to headphones, turn off and on again

Bluetooth mouse: Bluetooth is off, now what you want me to do?

I wish this was a joke... Yes, I am that stupid.

That one about a month from now when I've had it and don't care if the mic is off or not.

My 1300€ Thinkpad is just a noisy and sometimes annoying laptop. It is sometimes so loud that my colleague is pissed off.

It is almost four years old and dust cleaning did not help...
I am so pissed off by this behaviour i am actually thinking of selling it and buying a macbook.......

Appearently on of my coworkers is working while having a day off. Boss answered the chat with the request to shut the pc because he’s off today :)

!dev but it is a fucking rant.

Happy new years fucking 2018 already turning off great with me freezing my fucking balls off cause my heater aint fucking working. Top it off my Damn Hotter Than Hell Water Heater froze and i have no hotwater. Fuck somebody find me that son of a bitch 2018 where i can take it out im the woods and shoot that dickheaded cocksucking asshole.

switching the linux off via 'shutdown' in terminal, just because it is cool and so hacky

Taking over a deserter's work, the level of over abstraction and over generalization is off the charts.

WTF-per-minute (WPM): 3

Survived my second layoff at this company in less than 2 years. Feeling bitter sweet.

When I joined there was about 50 people here and now there is a little more than 15.

I think the way this company has done the layoffs have been humiliating to the people getting laid off. The “higher ups” will request that everybody be in the office for a company-wide meeting around noon. Then at around 11am that day, they will individual take people into conference rooms and lay them off. By the time the company-wide meeting starts, they’ve laid off all the people they needed.

Why lay people off infront of the whole rest of the company? I don’t see any reason

My phone is officially losing charge with TurboCharge and I can't turn it off as alarms won't go off..
Might need to return to my old *shivers* iPhone

Off Topic Rant: so the condo I'm currently renting in have 2 elevators but only 1 is functioning. They turned off the other elevator so that they can save some electric bill. I doubt it is being fixed because it is still not working up to this day. Now there's a waiting time for the elevator because only 1 of them is working. Rathole and shithole Asian country I'm in.

I realize burnout is like a steak - Take it off the grill early as it keeps cooking for a bit after.

Former co-founder is harassing me and threatening me with lawsuits.

Get the f** off my face you fucking scammer.

#rant

Starting off, I believed that the "sudo" is some magic God that can fix all my problems with Linux.

Imagine that!

Team off site tomorrow. Everyone is excited, I'm scared.

Am I the only one who turns off the PC by executing "die" in the command line?

(I use Archlinux with i3wm, so there is not a graphic button to turn off the PC, and writing shutdown -h 0 was too long)

The daily commute to my College takes 6 hours off my day.

And all I do is listen to music all 6 hours.

TIL CSS has a counter-increment property and it really gave off some powerful "HTML is a programming language" vibes.

When your code is so unorganized that you're better off starting over. (My devRant Win32 App).

There is something seriously​ wrong with me. I start to enjoy my work when I reach off timing.

Your tech will power off forever after two years of warranty is over. You agreed to that, it was in terms and conditions.

ugh the biggest turn off when i meet a girl is when her instagram username ends with .exe

Life is so much more fun when electricity is cut off and you still need to get day's worth of work done from home

Nooooo WHHYYYYY, football rumors is what i need to kick off my day!!!

When you come to work after 4 days off is like actually hitting the ground after a freefall

Why do people think Apple is ripping you off when Samsung is selling you at 3/4 the price of an iPhone BUT without full hardware AND software integration?

Company has 0 automation, but there is confluence page for every imaginable process you can think off. Wow

When you can't use the internet cause the Australian government thinks good internet is only for video games. Meanwhile at the genius labs of Microsoft insist on putting a "standby mode" as the default off state on my housemates Xbox One, that allows full speed downloads while "off". Then top it off with another housemate who thinks she knows computers (after getting me to upgrade hers) saying that she isn't making the internet lag while running Windows 10 with auto-updates enabled, while simultaneously uploading to Facebook on our epic 500kb/s upload speed.

"Posting is currently turned off for this type of place," so that photo of an oil rig off the coast of Tabasco will forever shape people's first impression of the Gulf of Mexico that US citizens are now supposed to call Gulf of America.

Something is… off. You can feeI it, but you can't quite put your finger on it.

It is officially fuck off on Friday!

So, fuck you all, and have a great weekend!

My company boss just changed the holiday rules...

Previously we had 2 Saturday off + 2 casual leaves and bank holidays...

Now as rule we did holiday on Monday, so he is i think angry or something...

He told us now no Saturday off, no bank holiday... Only we will get 2 leaves... That's alll...

I think it's time to Quit... Right?

To the person who added NULLIF function to MSSQL I say I hope rabid ferrets bite your balls off.
That is all.

age++

unfortunately we have a new CTO and handful of senior level resources joining our company this week, and I've risen to too lofty a position to be able to take the day off.

but they are sorely mistaken if they expect me not to fuck off to at least some degree. I also managed to obtain a PS5 last week so my attention this week never stood a chance. the most they'll get is a couple hours worth of on-boarding meetings outta me.

Clearing SMC and NVRAM on a MacBook is the new "have you tried to turn it off and on again?"

This is a piss off gem

Any Burmese here?

Let us know what's going on before your internet is cut off.

Good luck. Watching helplessly from Germany.

The best thing about a boolean is that even if you are wrong, you are off by only a bit.

Good guy Google.

Recently started a new job. Getting good feedback on my work. When really everything is off google :D

When there is no way to test the code you have written.... I cannot help but stress my arse off...

VR porn sucks... So does Daydream...

Overheating even on OP6... which is why I was watching it at 6am... Ok now I'm off to work...

Wearing socks for 12 hours straight is alright.
But wearing socks for 5-6 hours then taking them off for 5 mins and wearing them back again is weird.

The heat. Is fucking unbearable. Im sweating my fucking face off. I turn on air condition for a while and then its good but cant turn it on nonstop cz high electricity bill (fuck off) so when i turn it off i stard meltdowning

I fucking hate Richard Hendricks. That long nose jack off is not qualified to lead a retarded child to the loo let alone heading a company!

When you start a download and suddenly your pc shut off. I hate so much when the electric source is interrupted totally random

There is something off with the M1 MacBook. I can’t pinpoint but there is definitely something different about the experience. Not necessarily in a positive way. The interaction feels lacking of certain things. Don’t know. It is what it is.

What I can point out is that the notification functionality is definitely a little off. Could be Monterey’s fault.

they say a true coder is bearded..with my bug list, i decided to shave off :@

Project Manager: "You have until x date, but how far off are you from finishing"

Me: "How long is it until x date, there is your answer"

So I cant resize the window and I can't scroll down anymore... Where the fuck is "below" so I can turn "off" data collection 😤

Computers should have a 'what the fuck is this file type' button

Off to google I go

These days all companies just want to show off how evolved their AI is.
Any presentation without the neural networks CGI animation is incomplete!!!

Jumping off the building, problem is that the funny part is quite short.

Coworker admits to jerking off once behind a zoom call. He is a rookie.

" your mom is what we call in our field - a shared resource " - when some1 pisses you off

Microsoft Dynamics NAVision DB Backend - 22000+ Columns of pure cancer. 7 booleans for determining what day it is... fuck off...

When you get your computer all back together and working fine...

Then realise 2 hours later the side is still off!

Having to give time estimates for custom projects involving functionality unlike anything you've done before - FUCK OFF. How is that possible?!