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Search - "php rant"
This rant has been written from the Signal messaging app and uses a custom Signal 'gateway' (a registered user which is a server in this case) with a PHP api behind it. If this rant appears on devRant, it fucking works!47
I absolutely HATE "web developers" who call you in to fix their FooBar'd mess, yet can't stop themselves from dictating what you should and shouldn't do, especially when they have no idea what they're doing.
So I get called in to a job improving the performance of a Magento site (and let's just say I have no love for Magento for a number of reasons) because this "developer" enabled Redis and expected everything to be lightning fast. Maybe he thought "Redis" was the name of a magical sorcerer living in the server. A master conjurer capable of weaving mystical time-altering spells to inexplicably improve the performance. Who knows?
This guy claims he spent "months" trying to figure out why the website couldn't load faster than 7 seconds at best, and his employer is demanding a resolution so he stops losing conversions. I usually try to avoid Magento because of all the headaches that come with it, but I figured "sure, why not?" I mean, he built the website less than a year ago, so how bad can it really be? Well...let's see how fast you all can facepalm:
1.) The website was built brand new on Magento 126.96.36.199...what? I mean, if this were built a few years back, that would be a different story, but building a fresh Magento website in 2017 in 1.x? I asked him why he did that...his answer absolutely floored me: "because PHP 5.5 was the best choice at the time for speed and performance..." What?!
2.) The ONLY optimization done on the website was Redis cache being enabled. No merged CSS/JS, no use of a CDN, no image optimization, no gzip, no expires rules. Just Redis...
3.) Now to say the website was poorly coded was an understatement. This wasn't the worst coding I've seen, but it was far from acceptable. There was no organization whatsoever. Templates and skin assets are being called from across 12 different locations on the server, making tracking down and finding a snippet to fix downright annoying.
But not only that, the home page itself had 83 custom database queries to load the products on the page. He said this was so he could load products from several different categories and custom tables to show on the page. I asked him why he didn't just call a few join queries, and he had no idea what I was talking about.
4.) Almost every image on the website was a .PNG file, 2000x2000 px and lossless. The home page alone was 22MB just from images.
There were several other issues, but those 4 should be enough to paint a good picture. The client wanted this all done in a week for less than $500. We laughed. But we agreed on the price only because of a long relationship and because they have some referrals they got us in the door with. But we told them it would get done on our time, not theirs. So I copied the website to our server as a test bed and got to work.
So I show their developer the changes and he's stunned. He says he'll tell the hosting provider create a new server set up to migrate the optimized site over and cut over to, because taking the live website down for maintenance for even an hour or two in the middle of the night is "unacceptable".
So trying to be cool about it, I tell him I'd be happy to configure the server to the exact specifications needed. He says "we can't do that". I look at him confused. "What do you mean we 'can't'?" He tells me that even though this is a dedicated server, the provider doesn't allow any access other than a jailed shell account and cPanel access. What?! This is a company averaging 3 million+ per year in revenue. Why don't they have an IT manager overseeing everything? Apparently for them, they're too cheap for that, so they went with a "managed dedicated server", "managed" apparently meaning "you only get to use it like a shared host".
So after countless phone calls arguing with the hosting provider, they agree to make our changes. Then the client's developer starts getting nasty out of nowhere. He says my optimizations are not acceptable because I'm not using Redis cache, and now the client is threatening to walk away without paying us.
So I guess the overall message from this rant is not so much about the situation, but the developer and countless others like him that are clueless, but try to speak from a position of authority.
If we as developers don't stop challenging each other in a measuring contest and learn to let go when we need help, we can get a lot more done and prevent losing clients. </rant>15
To all the people giving advice in my previous rant (https://devrant.com/rants/1627035/...), thanks!
I've spent a weekend running high and naked through the forest, and decided to quit my job.
Fuck PHP. Fuck Laravel. Fuck hipster startup companies. Rasmus Lerdorf, Taylor Otwell and my CEO can all go suck each other's cocks in a sloppy mess of saliva, cum and type errors.
I'm so sick of spinach smoothies and weakly typed languages. All active record ORMs are retarded, VueJS is worse than JQuery, Fatal error: Call to a member function iHatePHP() on null. WHY DOES PHP EVEN HAVE METAPROGAMMING METHODS, WHY THE FUCK DOES LARAVEL CHOOSE EASY OVER SAFE.
I'm going to use my heavily abused Macbook to surf out of this mess, on a collapsing wave of unresolved bugs.
On to the next PHP/Laravel job at a hipster startup!26
Few weeks ago one guy has posted here something like: "Just started work at PornHub".
And now I see this:
I am a PHP developer.
Yeah, "another PHP is awful" rant... no, not really.
It's just unsuitable for some ambitious projects, just like Ruby and Python are.
First of all, DO NOT EVER use Laravel for large enterprise applications. The same goes for RoR, Django, and other ActiveRecord MVCs.
They are all neat frameworks for writing a todo app, as a better-than-wordpress flexible blogging solution, even as a custom webshop.
Beyond 50k daily users, Active Record becomes hell due to it's lazy fat querying habits. At more than a million users... *depressed sigh*.
PHP is also completely unsuitable for projects beyond 5M lines of code in my opinion. At more than 25M lines... *another depressed sigh*.
You can let your devs read Clean Code and books about architecture patterns, you can teach them about SOLID & DRY, you can write thousands of tests... it doesn't matter.
PHP is scaffolding, it's made of bamboo and rope. It's not brick or concrete. You can build quickly, but it only scales up to a certain point before it breaks in multiple places.
Eventually you run into patterns where even 100% test coverage still doesn't guarantee shit, because the real-life edge cases are just too complex and numerous.
When you're working on a multi-party invoicing system with adapters for various tax codes, or an availability/planning system working across timezones, or systems which implement geographical routefinding coupled to traffic, event & weather prediction...
PHP, Python, Ruby, etc are just missing types.
Every day I run into bugs which could have been prevented if you could use ADTs in a generic way in PHP. PHP7 has pretty good typehints, and they prevent a lot of messy behavior, but they aren't composable. There is no way to tell PHP "this method accepts a Collection of Users", or "this methods returns maybe either an Apple or a Pear, and I want to force the caller to handle both Apple/Pear and null".
Well, you could do that, but it requires a lot of custom classes and trickery, and you have to rewrite the same logic if you want to typehint a "Collection of Departments" instead of "Collection of Users" -- i.e., it's not composable.
Probably the biggest issue is that languages with a (mostly) structural type system (Haskell, Rust, even C#/JVM languages to some degree, etc) are much slower to develop in for the "startup" era of a project, so you grab a weak, quick prototyping language to get started.
Then, when you reach a more grown up phase, you wish you had a better type system at your disposal...28
Hello world, this is my first rant :)
Today at work, this was on the whiteboard.
Little "war" between the iOS pole and the PHP pole :D (Obviously PHP is better)19
Hey, wanna hear a disappointing stack?
- vanilla inline CSS
- shitty random legacy PHP
The author is NOT responsible nor liable for any injuries, mental health issues, sanitary problems, asexuality, crippling depression, triggered by this rant nor liable for any damaged walls, hurt animals or deaths.12
I'm a college drop out. Left my college almost 1 year ago, taught myself php, js, nodejs, basics about servers and how it all works, currently learning angular, nativescript and a few small things.
People still taunt me about leaving my college. About how I should've at least completed my degree.
Student of my university don't even know how to code.
Like they only know simple hello world programs.
They have no idea about :
-Version control system
-Cross-platform app development
-web hooks and REST API
-Stack overflow (Yeah, they don't know about it)
-and a whole ton of small things that you MUST know as a computer engineer like e.g. how to use Vim
I keep getting nagged about my choices and it frustrates me that I can't explain it to them cause they're dumb.
I mean seriously people! Can't you see the difference between me and an engineer who doesn't even know the difference between API and IDE?
I mean seriously?
They say it's APPLICATION PROGRAMMING INTERFACE so it's Qt creator or [any other IDE]
How can I deal with this kind of nonsense?
I'm from India, it's that bad here.
Anybody else a drop out? How did you handle it?
My parents are supportive but they too sometimes worry.66
I have been teaching my fiance PHP over the last year, and she has been sent her first technical test for a Junior Developer role. She is flying through it, seeing people enjoy coding is a great experience!5
PHP sucks balls,
It takes forever to do anything, it is so messy it feels like walking through a massive pile of shit!
Ok good I have your attention and that ++ 😇
But no this is not that kind of rant, quite the opposite.
In 70 lines of php shit as some people would call it, I am currently scrapping GitHub pages with ebook collections and with some minor regex pulling PDFs out and saving them to file.29
I've had my share of incompetent coworkers. In order of appearance:
1. A full stack dev. This one guy never, and I mean NEVER uses relationships in their tables. No indexing, no keys, nada. Couple of months later he was baffled why his page took ten seconds to load.
2. The same dev as (1). Requirement was to create some sort of "theme" feature for a web app. Hacked it by putting !important all over the place.
3. The same dev again. He creates several functions that if the data exists returns a view, and if it doesn't, "echo '0'". No, not return 0 or return false or anything, but fucking echo. This was PHP. If posted a rant about this a few months ago.
4. Same dev, has no idea what clean code is. No, not just reusable functions, he doesn't even get indenting right. Some functions have 4 spaces, some 2 tabs, some 6 tabs! And this is inside the same function. God wait until he tries Python...
5. Same dev now suggests that he become the PM. GM approves (very small company). Assigns me to travel to a client since they needed "technical assistance about the API". Was actually there to lead a UAT session.
Intermezzo, that guy went from fullstack dev to PM to sales (yes, one who calls clients to offer products) to business development, to product analyst in the span of two years.
After a year and a half there, I quit.
6. New company, a "QA engineer" who also assumes the role as the product owner. Does absolutely no tests other than "functional tests" in which he NEVER produces any form of documentation. Not even a set of test cases. He goes by "intuition".
7. Same guy as (6), hands me requirements for a feature. By "hands me" I mean he did that verbally. No spec documents, no slack chat, no Trello card. I ended up writing it as a card in Trello. Fast forward to the due date, he flips out because that wasn't what he wanted. Showed him the card. He walked away, without thinking of a solution how this mess should be handled.
Despite all this, I really don't want him (6&7) to leave the company. The devs get really stressed out at this job and he does make a really good person to laugh with/at.
So, as someone who has spent a lot of time in JS and a lot of time elsewhere, here are my views. Please, discuss your opinions with me as well. I am genuinely interested in an intelligent conversation about this topic.
So here's my background: learned HTML/CSS/JS in that order when I was 12 because I liked computers. I was pretty shitty at JS until U was at least 15, but you get the point, Ive had it sploshing about in my brain for a while.
Now, JS certainly has its quirks, no doubt, but theres nothing about the language itself that I would say makes it shitty. Its a very easy leanguage to use, but isn't overdeveloped like VB.net (Or, as I like to call it, TheresAFunctionForThat)
Most of the hate is centered around JS being used for a very broad range of systems. I doubt JS would be in the rant feed so often if it were to stay in its native ecosystem of web browsers. JS can be used in server backend, web frontent, desktop and mobile applications, and even in some system services (Although this isn't very popular as of yet). People seem to be terrified that one very easy to learn language can go so far. And, oh god, its interpreted... How can a system app run off an interpreted language? That's absurd.
My opinion on JSEverything is that it's progress. Thats what we're all about, right? The technologies already in place are unthreatened by JS, it isn't a gamechanger. The only thing JS integration is doing is making tedius and simple tasks easier. Big companies with large systems aren't going to jump ship and migrate to JS. A startup, however, could save a fucking ton of development time by using a JS framework, however. I want to live in a world where startups can become the next Google, because technology will stagnate when youre trying to protect your fortune, (Look at Apple for fucks sake) but innovation is born of small people with big ideas.
I have a feeling the hate for JS is coming from fear of abandoning what you're already doing. You don't have to do that. JS is only another option (And a very good one, which is why it's becoming so popular).
As for my personal opinion from my experiences... I've left this part til the end on purpose. I love programming and learning and creating, so I've never hated a lamguage, really. It all depends on what I want to do. In the times i've played arpund with JS, I've loved it. Very very easy. The idea of having it on both ends of web development makes a lot of sense too, no conversion, just direct communication. I would imagine this really helps with speed, as well. I wouldn't use it in a complicated system, though. Small things, medium size projects: perfect. Running a bank? No.
So what do you think about this JSUniverse?13
Guys! I did it! Its possible!
My task was to extension a code in php. I wrote 100 lines of code and then it workes on first try without any errors!
This is a milestone!
Bill Gates is nothing against me!15
Tons of people rant about how bad PHP is on devRant.
devRant's is built using PHP.
Okay it's called devRant - so I'll rant...
Why the fuck do people write comments like that:
$savesThisStuff = "stuff"; # does save stuff
Why are here 1500 lines from which there are 700 outcommented code and 300 dead functions which aren't called anywhere?
"Always code like the one maintaining your code next is a violent murderer with an axe and you'll still be save."
... Where's my axe again?9
I don't understand why people tend to shit on certain languages.
I`ve seen my fair share of shit software written in a plethora of languages, and the problem was usually that the devs used the language/framework completely wrong.
Languages and frameworks are designed to solve problems, if you don`t use them in the correct way then you are to blame.
It is like sticking your dick in the exhaust pipe of a Volvo, and then writing a Medium post complaining about your charred dick and how all Volvo's suck. Yeah I'm talking about you PHP haters, all of you that shit on Java on a daily basis and you morons saying "python is slow"
Don't get me wrong, I send PHP shitposts/memes all day to my friends working with it. But if my code doesn't work, it is my fault and I own up to it.
With that said, I will blow my brains out before writing a single line more of PHP
Since I was little I was fascinated by club light shows I saw on TV shows. I just couldn't find out how they made light react to sound, which were two completely unrelated things to me back then. But I wasn't dumb and somehow figured out that if I hooked some low energy fairy lights to my amp and turned the bass up, they would lightup to the beat.
3 fried fairy lights and angry parents for to loud music later I swore to myself that I would someday build something that could light up my whole room and react to the music I was playing.
I started coding about the age 13 (turned 20 a month ago) with some old school bat scripts. But I wanted something that would generate a .exe so I googled and ended up installing Visual Studio Express (again angry parents for installing without asking) and started copying my first VB.Net program together. From there no one could stop me. I wanted to archive something with an application and googled until I found what I needed and learned to code this way.
I learned writing decent vb.net code and itvwas about this time I came into contact with IRC. I lurked arround there and this is were I came into contact with Linix servers, because I wanted to code IRC (eggdrop) bots, so I learned TCL and got used to Linux. Time passed and I ended uo being a Global OP on some network back then.
I did go further, coded Minecraft Mods, thus Java, changed back to C#, learned PHP and started setting things up on my VPS, Mails server, web server, etc.
Nowadays I work as a Systemadmin / Developer Hybrid, earning my first real money doing what I love to do and guess what? In the meantime I proved myself I can accomplish what I wanted as kid. I bought some Club LED DMX capital lights and programmed a controller for them which can control them in C#, but in a way I can run it on my raspi using mono. I also coded a client which runs on windows which uses some native libraries to calculate the dominant color of the shown picture in realtime (Handels 24fps 1080p) and uses the lights as ambient light, like you see them behind TVs sometimes.
The same app uses Bass.NET and an algorithm to dedect a beat in realtime and switches the light colors. Exactly what I wanted as akid, but better.
I can even control the lights via the new Google Assistant and/or Tasker.
Feels fcking good.
Some of my work lies on github among other, mostly trash: https://github.com/Kimmax - didn't updated there in a while tho.
I plan on writing a new free opensource plugin based modular home automatication server and pretty sure could use some helping hands..
I don't know why I wrote all this, just felt like it.
Also: first Rant
Please don't kill me for errors in the text, I'm to lazy to read through it again right now :P8
My coding-senpai placed this PHP code (before he left) to my org's custom-footer due to a feud that happened months ago
it flooded their cPanel with folders with '.log' as their extension everytime someone visits their website
I LOL'D UNTIL
..They hired me to clean it up :^(
They got over 700,000 of these folders
$rant = [
'long' => true,
'super_pissed' => true
Oh where to begin... I have to post this here, I can't keep it to my self and I need to rant, god damnit.
I spent the last year working for a company, on minimum wage(my own choice... I know). I have been slaving away on a project that should really have a 5 man team backing it. My boss is completely on another planet, and has unrealistic expectations.
He got me to work with a client after work during this year, which I basically spent 8 of the 12 months, after work... also slaving away on the clients project.
I was supposed to have been paid A LOT of money, yet, every time I asked, "the client hasnt paid yet". One day I get an angry message from the client, asking why her shit is taking so long, why theres still so many bugs, why we dont have testers, why she cant bring clients on... and so on.
I then find out, she has paid my boss all of the money over the last 8 months, and my boss is still asking her for more money. He has lied to her and told her that I needed the money for things, and pocketed the money for him self, god knows what for.
Yesterday, I finally left the company, because I also haven't been paid wages for the last 2 months, my dickhead "boss" now refuses to reply to me on any platform, via phone etc.
I now have the client spamming me daily, asking where her updates are, when they will be done etc. My boss also ignores her.
I'm a good human being, I have lots of patience and worked 8 months for free, but now she expects me to work a further 1-2 months to fix, and add EVEN MORE features she never fucking mentioned.
I worked through a couple of the fixes, out of the goodness in my heart, with the fact she already paid for the project... after all, it's not her fault, nor mine....
A couple of days ago, she messaged me she found a new "great developer friend, with lots of experience and great analytical thinking" for me to work with, to get her shit complete. So I jump in a call with her friend, to talk about her PHP/Laravel experience, SHE DOESNT KNOW A SINGLE FUCKING THING.
The client demanded I give her friend access to the codebase, even though I told her, she's not going to be able to do anything at fucking all. Now this "amazing developer friend" of hers, is supposedly going to fix all of my issues, and tasks "I struggle with", bare in mind, I've worked with PHP for just over 6 years now, Laravel about 2-3.
I FIND THIS EXTREMELY FUCKING DISRESPECTFUL AND INSULTING, IF ANYTHING. Not only is this "developer" not going to be able to do shit, but make it worse. It's going to make my life even more fucking hell. On top of this, the client just has really fucking stupid expectations, she thinks HUGE updates can be done in fucking hours, she thinks she can message/call me a thousand times at 6 FUCKING AM. (Shes from the US, I'm from the UK) and she expects these updates instantly.
I dont even know where this is going anymore, or what else to say, but I'm extremely fucking pissed off. I'm now out of pocket by about 10 fucking grand. And now I'm living like a fucking peasant. I had to move back to my parents, and now I'm stuck in the fucking living room and cant even concenrate. I'm probably going to have to sign onto fucking job seekers, and be told how fucking worthless I am daily.
And ALLLLLLL OF THIS, because my boss is a greedy fucking cunt. I have no fucking idea where that money went, or what the fuck he did with it. But fuck me, I hope you accidently crash your car and die.17
-- How I succeeded turning a PHP/MYSQL app into Android app within a week --
Alright. So I wanted to grab your attention to what I'm about to write. If you are here just to read about the technologies I used, jump to bottom.
This is also a kind of rant; rant against the other fellow devs who demotivated me originally when I asked a question.
I'll not go in the details of my original question. Here's the link for those who are interested:
It's been days since I achieved what I wanted to but I thought someone might learn from my experience. So here it goes.
Well, it was an important client. I worked on his website and he asked for an app for the same website and told me he won't be able to pay me anything for the app. I was, somewhat, under the impression that he might be testing me. If not, then I would end up learning something new. It wasn't a bad deal for me so I didn't hesitate to took it.
Within a week, I was able to pull the job and finish it. I felt so much better (and proud of myself) when I finished the app within the week and client approved it. What did I get? I got a GOOD BANK CLIENT in my pocket now. Got a lot more worth of projects from the same client. If I were being paid for the app, I might not have pulled the job so much better.
So the moral of this story is never to give up. NOT EVERY DEVELOPER SELLS SHORT ONLY FOR "MONEY". Some enjoy learning new things. And some like me love to accept new challenges and are not afraid to try something new everyday.
In case, someone is interested in knowing the technologies I used, here they go;
I wrote an API for the interaction between the web services and the app.
Also, Ionic Framework seems promising but it had a learning curve and time was of the essence. But I'm gonna learn it anyhow.15
Once it really hit me hard. The father of my brothers wife once told me that I'm not fit for IT in general. He thinks that I have pseudo knowledge of IT and Programming.
He just works parttime at home as "computer scientist" and sells routers, pc and such stuff to some private customers. Before he used Filemaker and sayd that he already coded his own CRM with it.
When he said that it really made me sad. But after we talked I looked back what I already achieved:
1. I build for me and friends custom PC's with Case mods and Hard Tube watercooling
2. I can programm in HTML5, CSS3 and PHP
3. I raised a Community with over 60 people in it. We got 2 dedicated Linux Roots (I7-6700K, 64GB RAM, SSD)
4. I manage the Linux Servers on my own with VoIP, Mail-, Web-, MySQL- and Gameservers
5. I built up a complete Community Solution with Game Groups, Forum, Tournament System and a lot of custom scripts.
6. Now Im almost finished learning the C++ Basics to code and manage to learn the beginning of GUI/UX programming.
So I thought to myself "maybe in the eyes of others Im not a computer scientist, but then Im on the way to be one at least"
But please dont be a douche (the father) and prejudice me, before you don't know what I already can and achieved.
Just because you're are selling computer parts and installing them doesn't mean, that you are a computer scientist and telling me that I'm not 😉
In IT you're the smith of your own merit!7
Been working with some remote freelancers that my boss has hired.
Guess what I've found in their committed code?
I've not seen someone as sloppy as this guy right here.
Just fuck me already.34
One Thursday noon,
operation manager: (looking at mobile)what the.....something is wrong i am getting bunch of emails about orders getting confirmed.
Colleague dev: (checks the main email where it gets all email sent/received) holy shit all of our clients getting confirmation email for orders which were already cancelled/incomplete.
Me: imediately contacting bluehost support, asking them to down the server so just that we can stopp it, 600+ emails were already sent and people keep getting it.
*calls head of IT* telling the situation because he's not in the office atm.
CEO: wtf is happening with my business, is it a hacker?
*so we have a intrusion somebody messed the site with a script or something*
All of us(dev) sits on the code finding the vulnerabilities , trying to track the issue that how somebody was able to do that.
*After an hour*
So we have gone through almost easch function written in the code which could possibly cause that but unable to find anything which could break it.
Head asking op when did you started getting it actually?
Op: right after 12 pm.
*an other hour passes*
Head: (checking the logs) so right after the last commit, site got updated too?. And....and.....wtf what da hell who wrote this shit in last commit?
* this fuckin query is missing damn where clause* 🤬
Me: me 😰
*long pause, everyone looking at me and i couldn't look at anyone*
The shame and me that how can i do that.
Head: so its you not any intrudor 😡
Further investigating, what the holy mother of #_/&;=568 why cronjob doesn't check how old the order is. Why why why.
(So basically this happened, because of that query all cancelled/incomplete orders got updated damage done already, helping it the cronjob running on all of them sending clients email and with that function some other values got updated too, inshort the whole db is fucked up.)
and now they know who did it as well.
*Head after some time cooling down, asked me the solution for the mess i create*
Me: i took backup just couple of days before i can restore that with a script and can do manual stuff for the recent 2 days. ( operation manager was already calling people and apologising from our side )
Head: okay do it now.
Me: *in panic* wrote a script to restore the records ( checking what i wrote 100000000 times now ), ran...tested...all working...restored the data.
after that wrote an apology email, because of me staff had to work alot and it becomes so hectic just because of me.
* at the end of the day CEO, head, staff accepted apology and asked me to be careful next time, so it actually teached me a lesson and i always always try to be more careful now especially with quries. People are really good here so that's how it goes* 🙂2
Let's take a moment to appreciate interested and enthousiastic non-developers who really want to learn a programming language.
I am studying Medical IT at my college and most of my classmates aren't coming from an IT background.
Some of my classmates approach me when they're stuck while coding and I try to teach them as much as possible so they understand what they are doing wrong and how to fix it.
I also show them how they can optimise their code step by step and they love it!
As a classmate told me yesterday:
"It's always so much fun working with you. I come up with a small problem, but I end up learning so much more about programming when solving a problem with you. I appreciate that."
It's a mindset I've learned when I was doing my developer apprenticeship back in the day. One of my colleagues told me: "if they want your help because they need a quick fix, tell them to kiss your ass. If you know they've already tried everything they could and ask you specifically because they want to understand what they are doing wrong, they are future developers with great potential, so go teach them."
May the force be with you, my enthousiastic little non-devs ❤️5
Should I tell my kids that I liked PHP when I was young or will they be bullied in school if their friends find out about their dad?7
>> this === rant
At beginning of this year, I only knew HTML, JS, and CSS so I just applied for offers like "Jr Apprentice Dev in Front-End"
In a interview call, the woman told me that they will send me a test asking about my JS and HTML5 knowledge.
When I look in my inbox, the mail subject says "Back-end Test".
Then I call the woman:
Me: "Hello, I have received the test mail, but maybe it's wrong. I applied for a Front-End position and the test is about backend! "
She: "Do you have skills in JS and HTML5?"
Me: "Yes!, and CSS3"
She: "Well, the test is about that. JS, jQuery, and HTML5"
Me: "Sorry, that languages are Front-End. In the subject say 'Back-End' and Back-End is PHP, SQL, MySQL, Java, .Net... I don't know nothing about that. I only know HTML, JS, CSS."
She: "It's the same"
Me: "I sorry but it's not the same. Fron-End is client-side, what users sees. Animation, colors, FXs, buttons, forms... And Back-End is server-side, what users doesn't see."
She: "Well, JS, HTML, and CSS is backend for us. We call it that way too"
Me: "Sorry but that is wrong. I invite you to read some basic info. Now I am confused"
Of course that I am not confused. That idi0t was wrong.
Perhaps recruiters should take some info about areas where they are recruiting... (:T)3
Hi guys, this is my first rant so bear with me..
Stupid Indian fucking institutes doesn't give a shit about the things we learn in the institute. This curriculum is like from the 90's. I learnt NodeJS recently and I thought wow a new concept, not even my professor knows about it. I must be on top of the world or at least any way near it and then I see these video tutorials on the internet which are posted 2 years ago. OH MY GOD!! The thing is that my department's HOD doesn't know about that and the funny thing is that I'm doing a project under him "SECURITY OF WEB APPLICATIONS" and the only thing he knows is PHP. And FYI I'm not studying in an institute which is oblivious to the outside world. It's called an NIT, an institute of national fucking importance. At the end, I blame myself though. I should have been on myself not being completely dependent on the professors for knowledge.
I could fill the entire text area with the rant.
But then people will start ranting about the rant.
I will be posting more Indian-devRant soon so.. peace till then.
( I bet they don't know about Git/Github too)24
So my php devduck finally came in! This is seriously the coolest. Me and this duck are gonna have some great convos together xD Thanks devrant!2
When I saw you I was afraid to meet you. When I met you I was afraid to learn you. When I learnt you I was afraid to love you. Now that I love you, I am afraid to lose you....... CODE WITH ❤ IN <?php..........?>9
This is more of a wishful thinking scenario......but language/tech stack/whatever bashing.
Look, I get it, we like development, we would not be here if we didn't like it. But as my good friend @Stuxnet has mentioned in the past, making this a personality trait is fucking retarded, lame, small, and overall pathetic. I agree with this sentiment 100%
Because of this a lot of people have form some sort of elitist viewpoint concerning the technologies that people use, be it Java, C#, C++, Rust, PHP, JS, whatever, the same circle jerk of bashing on shit just seems completely fucking retarded. I am hoping for a new mentality being that most of us are younger, even if you are a 50+ year old developer, maturity should give you a different perspective, but alas, immaturity and a bitchy attitude carried throughout years of self dick sucking implications would render this null.
I could not give two fucks if the dude next to me is coding his shit in whatever as long as best practices are followed, proper documentation is enforced, results are being brought to our customers(which regardless of how much you try to convince us, none of your customers are fucking elite level) and happiness is ensured, then so fucking be it.
Gripes bitches and complaints are understandable, I dislike a couple of things about my favorite tools, and often wish certain features be involved in my particular tech stacks, does this make stuff bad? no, does it make me or anyone else less of a developer,? no so why give a fuck? bitch when shit bites you in the ass when someone does not know what the fuck they are doing with a language that permits writing bullshit. Which to be honest ALL of them fucking allow. Not one is saved from this. But NOT knowing how to work a solution, or NOT understanding a tech stack does not give you AUTOMATIC FULL insight on how x technology operates, thinking as such is so fucking arrogant and annoying.
But I am getting tired of looking at posts from Timmy, a 18 year old "dev" from whothefuckcares bitch about shit when they have never even made a fucking penny out of their "development" endeavors just because they read some dickhead's opinion on the internet regarding x tech stack and believes that adopting their bullshit troll ass virgin ideas makes them l337.
Get your own fucking opinion on things, be aggressive and stand fucking straight, maybe get some fucking pussy(or dick, whatever) and for fucks's sake learn to interact with other fucking human beings, take a fucking run, play games, break out from your whinny bitch ass shell, talk to that person that intimidates you, take a run, do yoga, martial arts anything that would break you out from being such a small little bitch.
Just fucking do something that keeps you from shitting on people 24/7 365/ a year.
We used to bitch about incompetent managers, shit bosses, fucking ludicrous assignments. Retarded shit that some other dev did, etc, etc. Seems like every other fucking retard getting into this community starts with stupid ass JS/PHP/Python/Java/C#/ whatever jokes and you idiots keep upvoting that shit. Makes those n00bs gain credability. Fuck me shit is so pathetic.
basically, make dev rant great again.
No fuck off and have a beer, or tea or whatever y'all drink.18
I've seen people doing story/rant to introduce themselves, and I never done that, probably because I'm terrible at doing so, and the more people their is, the more complicated it gets for me. 😥
Usually I try to blend in, and be the same color as the wall. But I want to try something different, so bear with me as I go through this painful process. 😶
So here I am, a lonely dev, who only have friends through a screen, living in a dark room only lit by green leds (tho sometimes it turn red/pink), lost in a small street of Paris. I usually avoid posting on social media, but here on devRant, I feel alright, somehow, it feels like home... 🤗
Started developing at 14 with html and php, then css and js (with the later still being a mystery to me). 🤔
I never really had a real job. Had 3 month as an intern into a human size web agency, and despite the recommandation they gave, I didn't like the job... Dropped from school and self learned everything I know today. Did a certain amount of personal projects, but no publication for lack of confidence. As of today, I'm 28. 🙂
Then a year and half ago, I changed to c# with unity3D, and I had a ton of fun since. 😄
Learned cg effect, texturing, 3d, a bit of animation. I'm working on a project of indi game with two people that are my only social interaction outside of my family, and now devRant. I don't mind being lonely tho. 😯
But this community is awesome, so I'm glad I stumbled across that sad face on the play store. 😄
Also it's 7:30am, I didn't sleep because of this post, I'm tired, and yes I'm an idiot.21
Started writing PHP as a tag for a rant and the third suggested tag is "PHP #facepalm". What are people trying to say about PHP? 😝1
I already talked about it in another rant but here it is !
This year, I got the chance to teach PHP to my fellow students in my uni.
PHP was the first programming language I ever learned (5 years ago) and this year I had a PHP class in my uni. I knew that I would not learn anything new (as I'm more competent than the teacher). So my teacher let me help the other students when I had finished the exercices. Then my teacher got sick and I, kinda officially, replaced him during 3 weeks.
I'm very thankful that he gave me that chance and thanks to him I discovered a new part of IT that I didn't knew. And even if I didn't learn anything new in PHP, I learned a lot by troubleshooting others projects and trying to understand how they reason. I really developed a new soft skill that I never knew I would have.
That also really helped me to trust myself and I got more confident about my programming skills.
This is one of the best experiences I got during my studies so far.3
Story: Password hashing and UTF-8
Context: PHP 5.6, 270kloc 15+ years legacy project. ~3 years ago. tl;dr at bottom.
Password hashing & verification was done with an obsolete way of hashing passwords. I was given the task to update our password handler to from now on generate passwords with PHP's good built-in password hashing function.
It was decided that old passwords still needed to work, instead of prompting users to set a new password. The old password verification still had to function in conjunction with the new.
The previous password handler was split into multiple classes, due to (I assume) poor structuring and shoehorning in an object oriented approach. Furthermore, it abused global variables.
A new password handler had to be created.
I implemented the new password verification and creation methods (which now used PHP internal password functions), and it worked perfectly. Then to get the old password verification to work.
I removed all obsolete methods from the old handler, and was left with a hashing function which took in a password, salt, and a secret key. I copied this code into the new handler.
It failed. It returned "Password does not match" for old passwords. I was unsure what had happened here. I did all sorts of shotgun debugging. I ended up with two versions of the login page next to each other, which used the old and new code respectively. I started modifying the original code, extracting variables, logging, you name it. I ended up with exactly the same snippets of code in both password handlers, and yet it failed.
The culprit? The character encoding.
Because this project was over a decade old, the .php-file had the encoding 'windows-1252'. When I created the new password handler, my IDE set the file encoding to 'UTF-8'. Then when I copied the secret, my IDE converted the string to 'UTF-8', effectively changing the value of the secret and causing any password verifications to fail. The solution was to manually create a string using the byte values in the old secret.
It is these extreme, obscene, scenarios which makes working with legacy projects a living hell. In this scenario, it was my IDE at fault for changing the character encoding.
But my IDE is not the root problem. No, I blame it on the lack of maintenance from previous developers. Not keeping the codebase up to standard causes problems like this in the long run.
tl;dr: copied hash secret to a file with another encoding. IDE changed the byte values for those characters, causing password verification to fail. fml.2
Long rant, sorry.
I’m pretty upset, or let’s say: I want to kick asses and chew gum but I’m all out of gum(The duke TM).
Yesterday we had a discussion in the office about salary basically.
Context: The company has about 150 employees and earns a lot of money. I’m the lead dev for about 1.5 years since I joined.
So I talked to our CEO/HR about a raise since I was hired as a normal fullstack dev(title is lead dev now) but have to:
train my junior(PHP), frontend guy(react), our QA(Automation with cypress atm), our junior devop(gitlab, jenkins, docker) and even assist marketing with GTM and adword campaigns.
I’m a jack of all trades basically since I was a freelancer for big brands for a long time.
I’m fine with helping/training, I like it a lot but I still have to watch everything and be fast with my own stuff. If anything goes wrong, people call me.
That will change since I train them all(They will all be independent soon) but still, doing everything for the same pay feels wrong.
Bottom line: CEO told me it’s cool that they can use all my skills but I won’t get a raise.
The worst/strangest was: My coworkers heard about that(as always in an office) and were like: Everybody should get paid equally because we’re all a team. Uhm, ok?
I just contacted the head hunter which got me that job. I guess I’ll just see what the market has to offer.
It should never be about money but this was confusing. People telling me we should all be equal who are on their mobiles 3h a day and feel underpaid. Check yourself, really.
People who think their pure presence is enough.. Germany -.-25
First rant: but I'm so triggered and everyone needs a break from all the EU and PC rants.
incredible async code (await/async)
universal support on almost everything connected to the internet
runs on almost all platforms including natively
dynamically interpreted but also internally compiled (like Perl)
gave birth to JSON (you're welcome ppl who remember that the X in AJAX stood for XML)
All these people ranting about JS don't understand that JS isn't frikin magic. It does what it needs to do well.
If you're using it for compute-heavy machine learning, or to maintain a 100k LOC project without Typescript, then why'd you shoot yourself in the foot?
As a proud JS developer I gotta scroll through all these posts gushing over the other languages. Why does nobody rant about using Python for bitcoin mining or Erlang to create a media player?
Cuz if you use the wrong tool for the right job, it's of course gonna blow up in your face.
For example, there was a post claiming JS developers were "scared" of multithreading and only stick in their comfort zone. Like WTF when NodeJS came out everything was multithreaded. It took some brave developers to step out of the comfort zone to embrace the event loop.
For a web app, things like PHP and Node should only be doing light transforms between the database information and HTML anyways. You get one thread to handle the server because you're keeping other threads open to interface with databases and the filesystem. The Nexus.js dev ranting on all us JS devs and doesn't realize that nobody's actual web server is CPU bound because of writing HTML bodies, thats why we only use 1 thread. We use other worker threads to do the heavy lifting (yes there is a C++ bridge look it up)
Anyways TL;DR plz respect JS developers we're people too. ES7 is magic and please don't shit on ES3 or we'll start shitting on the Python 2-3 conversion (need to maintain an outdated binary just cuz people leave out ()'s in their print statements)
Or at least agree that VB.NET is an abomination and insult to the beauty that is TI-84 BASIC13
A lot of engineering fads go in circle.
Architecture in the 80s: Mainframe and clients.
Architecture in the 90s: Software systems connected by an ESB.
Architecture in the 2000s: Big central service and everyone connects to it for everything
Architecture in the 2010s: Decentralized microservices that communicate with queues.
Current: RabbitMQ and Kafka.
... Can't we just go back to the 90s?
I hate fads.
I hate when I have to get some data, and it's scattered on 20 different servers, and to load a fucking account page, a convoluted network of 40 apps have to be activated, some in PHP, others in JS, others on Java, that are developed by different teams, connected to different tiny ass DBs, all on huge clusters of tiny ass virtual machines that get 30% load at peak hours, 90% of which comes from serializing and parsing messages. 40 people maintaining this nightmare, that could've been just 7 people making a small monolithic system that easily handles this workload on a 4-core server with 32GB of RAM.
Tripple it, put it behind a load balancer, proper DB replication (use fucking CockroachDB if you really want survivability), and you've got zero downtime at a fraction of the cost.
Just because something's cool now, doesn't mean that everybody has to blindly follow it for fucks sake!
Same rant goes for functional vs OOP and all that crap. Going blindly with any of these is just a stupid fad, and the main reason why companies need refactoring of legacy code.13
That is my first...well, rant? No, not at all.
I found this community by accident. I was looking for something like this, but did not realize til now. I scrolled through some posts and it is awesome to read awesome stories and rants from awesome people.
I am a 21 year old SAP ABAP developer from Germany. I have finished my bachelor's degree (business informatics/business information management? German: Wirtschaftsinformatik) last August. I have always been interested in web development and teached myself some php basics when I was younger. I would love to do more things like that, but things have changed. There are lots of different frameworks, languages and stuff. It's complicated.
I am not sure if I have understood how this community works, but I am very excited to find out.
And, as I already mentioned, I am German. So please feel free to bash my shitty English. :D26
I remember my newbie mistake: I kept on refreshing my browser to see the changes on local, and took me a billion F5s before I realize that I was on live.
I can't be the only one.
I was talking with a PHP dev. He was also fan of Hellreiser as I am.
We were bored and I sugested to design a “Php superhero” or something like that. He propoused “Php man: Once the page loads, he can’t do anything”. Then, I draw this: A Php cenobite. (Cenobite: Like an interdimentional sado monster)
Yes, the php dev is the same guy of the php thong from my last rant 😂8
More of a question than a rant. What to do regarding programming.
I'm self taught, php, c, c#, and I make stupid little programs that make my life easier as a sys admin.
I want to ask, how do I take things further? Where I'm from, it's really hard to get a job as a programmer without 5 years experience and knowledge in 5 other languages.
Do I try and make bigger apps to showcase myself and hope someone finds me, or what do I do in this instance. I'm not a fully fledged coder, but I'm comfortable and if I don't know something i learn it pretty quickly.
Is there a way that you get a job, even as a junior? Or is it pure luck?10
So a few of you devranters were asking if my devrant-widget project was open source.
Well I finally felt confident enough to share my devrant-widget project on github so a link is now available :) I'm pretty new to the open source community so go easy on me xD but I think this project could do some good.
Its just a simple widget I wrote in php this past week that pulls your profile data and the widget can be customized a little via json configuration.
Anyways, feel free to use it in your projects, make suggestions or contribute to the project if interested.
Best day of my life ❤️.
Arrow functions will be added to PHP 7.4:
Just discovered this App, created my account to say Hello and create my first rant. I'm already in love!
To my Person:
This rant affects me indirectly.
It was our diploma project, me, and DrugKidProgrammer.
He was lazy, late, and all the shit that comes with and used to party hard on weekend.
I told him that while on vacation he’d better fucking manage to get the backend done, or at least ready to debug.
Well, actually it was mixed.
When he came back he gave me the files he worked on (no version control at the time), and nothing was working, 500 errors everywhere. When I opened the files I found out String concaténations using ‘+’ and shit like this.
I spend 1 and a half day correcting this shit.
Fuck you mate.2
That's it, I'm done. My sincere condolences go to the poor soul that will have to maintain this complete and utter crap of code, as I have been doing the past 2 weeks.
All the function and variable names are complete nonsense. You might as well have smashed your head against the keyboard and let whatever came out be the names.
You took all the naming conventions that you could find and unleashed your seriously damaged imagination. lowerCamelCase, UpperCamelCase, snakecase, everything in the same fucking function name.
I really needed the money from this project. But I'm done. My mental sanity is more important that try to figure out how to make a decent and usable webpage of THIS COMPLETE DISASTER.
You, the one before me. If you wanted to make sure that no one else besides you could work with this crap, then congrats, YOU FUCKING DID IT WITH HONORS. FUCKING SUMMA CUM LAUDE. PhD and all.4
Long rant 😤😤😤
Today I was going to hit my project manager in the face. I can't stand people like him. In every fucking meeting he starts talking about his past successes and we are forced to listen to him. In this sprint, we had a tough task which took more time than planned. So we didn't finish it till the deadline. After working hard all night long I finally managed to get the job done. And today guess what happened? He didn't fucking appreciate it. All he was talking was mediocre look of the module we've developed for the website. And it's not even my job to make a beautiful design as a back-end developer. At a point I wanted to resign. I don't know how much I will stand this situation. He has always been like this since he came to the company. The worst part is, he is not a senior developer or something. Al he talks about is some fucking old jobs he has done we don't know if they are real or not. From every meeting we suspect his skills are limited. He just knows how to talk. He has never reviewed a single line of code because he doesn't know PHP (yes I know, I know). Hell he doesn't know any back-end language and he is supposed to create a new architecture for the website. He don't have enough database skills neither. All he says he has worked as a mobile and front-end developer. So now I'm home and don't know If I should resign or not.4
Did a bunch more cowboy coding today as I call it (coding in vi on production). Gather 'round kiddies, uncle Logan's got a story fer ya…
First things first, disclaimer: I'm no sysadmin. I respect sysadmins and the work they do, but I'm the first to admit my strengths definitely lie more in writing programs rather than running servers.
I could rant for days about the various problems this codebase has, but today I have a very specific story to tell. A story about errors and logs.
And it all started when I noticed the disk space on our server was gradually decreasing.
So today I logged onto our API server (Ubuntu running Apache/PHP) and did a df -h to check the disk space, and was surprised to see that it had noticeably decreased since the last time I'd checked when everything was running smoothly. But seeing as this server does not store any persistent customer data (we have a separate db server) and purely hosts the stateless API, it should NOT be consuming disk space over time at all.
The only thing I could think of was the logs, but the logs were very quiet, just the odd benign message that was fully expected. Just to be sure I did an ls -Sh to check the size of the logs, and while some of them were a little big, nothing over a few megs. Nothing to account for gigabytes of disk space gradually disappearing.
What could it be? I wondered.
du . | sort --sort=numeric
What's this? 2671132 K in some log folder buried in the api source code? I cd into it and it turns out there are separate PHP log files in there, split up by customer, so that each customer of ours (we have 120) has their own respective error log! (Why??)
Armed with this newfound piece of (still rather unbelievable) evidence I perform a mad scramble to search the codebase for where this extra logging is happening and sure enough I find a custom PHP error handler that is capturing (most) errors and redirecting them to these individualized log files.
Conveniently enough, not ALL errors were being absorbed though, so I still knew the main error_log was working (and any time I explicitly error_logged it would go there, so I was none the wiser that this other error-catching was even happening).
Needless to say I removed the code as quickly as I found it, tail -f'd the error_log and to my dismay it was being absolutely flooded with syntax errors, runtime PHP exceptions, warnings galore, and all sorts of other things.
My jaw almost hit the floor. I've been with this company for 6 months and had no idea these errors were even happening!
The sad thing was how easy to fix all the errors ended up being. Most of them were "undefined index" errors that could have been completely avoided with a simple isset() check, but instead ended up throwing an exception, nullifying any code that came after it.
Anyway kids, the moral of the story is don't split up your log files. It makes absolutely no sense and can end up obscuring easily fixable bugs for half a year or more!
My first rant/story
> 3 years ago company x decides to pay for my software dev degree
> fast forward to today.. x has no idea what I've learned as they never asked..(basically java,php,sql,android)
> x gives me a contract 1 week before my final exams and expects me to work everyday except exam days..
>next day, a dev contacts me - 'oh please brush up on your Vue, Node, angular as well as laravel php framework'
>I've never touched any of those xD fml.. what to do!?9
update of after i got fired: after the fuck developers company llc was left with no developers, there was a girl there that i didn't mention earlier because as i said: the story is more complex. she came there with good intentions but after she knew the cruel nature of fuck and shit she became notoriously mad, we're still in contact with her so it's nice to hear from her some of the gags that happen there, one of which my really intelligent ex-boss the wordpress DEVELOPER himself told her to finish one of the projects i was working on, and a friend of mine who is infamous of his coding shenanigans left it in my hands before he left as well a couple of months prior (well he was fed up before us, and when i told him to stay with us he said "dude just listen to the motherfucker's voice, i can't do this anymore", my lovely ex-boss has this equally lovely screechy high pitched voice that caused me tinnitus), it's an asp.net project, uses web forms, and a lot of apis, the database is sql server, standard shit but there's no original creation script and i fucked up the only existing database which was in a local computer he used to like calling a SERVER, now to the point: this girl is not a developer, she was however working as a reporter?? kind of like jaspersoft the human or sap crystal woman and she claims that she's pretty good at it, and she's a genuinely good person who was dragged to hell just because she wanted to be close to her daddy (she was working in a different city with more than double the salary she's given now), but she's rich and her dada convinced her to come. she's currently learning java ee on her own so she'd probably leave in the next two months, in her resume she wrote that she know php, well i know php you know php we all know php (the syntax) kind of like mr. shit who passed the sololearn php CERTIFICATE and couldn't stop telling his boss and his boss a.k.a my ex-boss goes "sweet!". going back to the punchline of this rant: she told us that he came to her and asked her to finish the project with php.12
So during my internship I learned a lot about Linux, Docker and servers and I recently switched from a shared hosting to my own VPS. On this VPS I currently have one nginx server running that serves a static ReactJs application. This is temponarily, I SFTP-ed the build files to the server and added a config file for ssl, ciphers and dhparams. I plan to change it later to a nextjs application with a ci/di pipeline etc. I also added a 'runuser' that owns the /srv/web directory in which the webserver files are located. Ssh has passwords disabled and my private keys have passphrases.
Now that I it's been running for a few days I noticed a lot of requests from botnets that tried to access phpmyadmin and adminpanels on my server which gave me quite a scare. Luckily my website does not have a backend and I would never expose phpmyadmin like that if I did have it.
Now my question is:
Do you guys know any good articles or have tips and tricks for securing my server and future projects? Are there any good practices that I should absolutely read and follow? (Like not exposing server details etc., php version, rate limiting). I really want to move forward with my quest for knowledge and feel like I should have a good basis when it comes to managing a server, especially with the current privacy laws in place.
Thanks in advance for enduring my rant and infodump 😅7
Saw a rant about a teacher so I thought I'd share one of my experiences.
So I had this teacher who was supposed to teach us the basics of web development (HTML, CSS and some basic PHP).
Now this guy didn't really like me very much but that is besides the point.
One day me and a classmate were working on an assignment in class, we ran into a problem but we couldn't find the mistake in the code. So we went to ask the teacher. We explain the whole thing, the teacher stares at our code for a good couple minutes (while the problem can only be in a few lines) and then says something along the lines off: "I don't like that you put your curly brackets on the same line as the if statement, fix that first and then come back"
Needless to say, my classmate and I were standing there with our minds blown.
He knew nothing about PHP, all he did was read out power points.
On top of that, a quick LinkedIn search proved that he normally works as PM an that he has no coding experience!
WHY WAS THIS DUDE FUCKING HIRED????10
My first ever post! So awesome to find out dev rant and cheer up my day as I go thru everyone's story/rant.
I was single the whole time while I'm at school. After graduated, I finally pick up the pace to date girls. So I signed up for a few online dating sites/apps. Every single time that I create a new profile for the app/site, I always get frustrated and confused about the language field. Especially when there's only selector or check box for languages selections.
GO AND FUCK YOURSELVES. MANY PEOPLE RANT ABOUT JOB HUBTING AND INSANE REQUIREMENTS. SO HERE IN SPAIN I'M SURE THE SITUATION IS WORSE. NO FUCKING JOBS. WHEN YOU FIND AN OFFER THAT DOESN'T MENTION PHP, JAVA OR COBOL OHH. YOU NEED TO BE A FUCKING WP, FULL STACK, ANDROID AND IOS DEVELOPER, A FUCKING SYSADMIN AND HAVE 99 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. SO YOU CAN SAY: hey search a junior offer! YEAH SURE ONE SECOND. 4-15 FUCKING YEARS OF FUCKING EXPERIENCE. GO AND FUCK YOURSELVES AAAAH8
The craziest deadline I have had was to build an e-commerce site with php in 3 days after learning php for just a week.
<rant> am I oz or Harry Potter?</rant>1
Updating PHP from 5 to 7.2 on windows server at work the other day... Thought it would be easy, but I really find software management for windows a pain in the ass compared to package based solutions like apt, brew or pacman. It ended up taking way too long due to dependcies with the website, that weren't really documented, and setting up all the software that depended on PHP over again... I ended up writing 10 pages of documentation about how to updated PHP on windows, so the next programmer would have some idea of how to approach the problem.
Of course I suggested switching over to Chocolatey for windows, but my boss is skeptical since it's not the traditional way, and it seems like it will take too many resources. So now I have to make a presentation for her to convince her that package managers are superior to downloading stuff from phps website.
Wish me luck.4
Playing around with pxgamer's php wrapper for the devrant api and was able to display my devrants avatar image in my portfolio project :D7
PHP is the Fidel Castro of programming languages; after all Castro outlived five US presidents who ordered his assassination. And of course, like reports of Mark Twain’s death being exaggerated, it’s patently absurd to call a language that powers 80% of the web dead.3
So I'm just wondering if this happened to everyone else because a few friends of mine at work have corroborated my experience.
So, when I was very young and just starting to learn PHP, I was trying to grasp OOP. I read and read about it and did the example tutorials and nothing really did it for me. Then one day, writing some scripts for a game I played, it just hit me. Literally like "oh.....I get it. That's why this is a thing."2
Applied to a Jr. Dev job and was hired as a Digital Marketer — I can deal with this, I’m AdWords & Analytics certified. What I can’t abide is that I spent the last year working my ass off learning to code and the person next to me with the Jr. Dev position only uses DIVI and has zero inclination to study, learn or write basic HTML & CSS—much less PHP. I’m not an expert by any means but I love programming, I love the problem solving, the challenges and the culture of it all. So far, and these are only two examples, I’ve shown him how to use the target attribute to open a page as a new tab, and how to register a nav in the functions.php file to create a menu but he is unwilling to even attempt it. Rather, he told me that I was too technical and that no one would be using code in this day and age.
For the record, I think DIVI is a cool platform, it’s clear that my boss knows nothing about code to be fair and I love my job— this is my only issue so far😂 I just needed to rant.5
Aren't the system admin supposed to figure out how to install something on their server when a developer has requested something from them?
They seem to have no idea when I request them to install php gd extension. They also cannot give me a ssh access to their server. So I have to troubleshoot/help by sending one command and ask for the output from them and give another command to run through mail.
I don't even know what to rant or whom to rant at anymore.
// I'm blue.12
Two years ago, I started to learn Ruby on Rails so I would at last know a server language even though it wasn't the almighty PHP. Two years ago minus a few months, I decided to put my first website online with Apache and Passenger. It took me a whole six hours with stress and cries for help until I finally saw my website's homepage displayed on my screen
Today, after a few more websites (and currently 3 more projects but still not released, dang it), I tried to update mySQL to 5.7 since I need it to be able to save arrays for a future project, but everything went full shitstorm with broken packages and lame-ass-shit tutorials that make you doubt your sanity.
So I decided to backup my database and my online websites and to reinstall the whole server and take advantage of it to update the current used gems (Rails 4.2 -> 5.1, not bad)
Not only it took me just a bit more than 2 hours to redeploy the websites, but I didn't felt at the edge of panicking once, and now everything works like a charm.
I feel fucking alpha now.2
I've been staffed on a old ongoing project, first day.
0. Compatibility has to be guaranteed down till IE9... ppf.
1. Front end made in XHTML+JS(jQuery)... bah, ok.
2. XHTML+JS is actually generated by PHP5.4, not a line is actually statically served... beh, funny, ok.
3. PHP files are the output of an XSLT transform of a bunch of XMLs... meh, seriously? Oooook.
4. XMLs are the product of the serialisation of a truck of stateful JavaEE6 DTOs populated magically (undocumented) with data coming from a SQL DB... WTF mode!!!
5. Session logics lives within PHP-land at point 2, front end makes ajax calls here that propagates to another WS out of our control that triggers -somehow- (undocumented) our Java backend at point 4 to generate new XMLs and then reach front end again. Kill me now.
Boss: look... it's too slow for the client, it's too heavy on our servers: fix it. Ah, and we sold 85% test coverage by October. You're the man for the job. (I'm a Node.js fullstacker and right now there's not even a testing scaffold, ofc).
Me: prod is on Linux or Windows?
Me: rm -rf / as root. Done.
Boss: I know I know...
I think time has come...6
Okay, first rant here.
Spend most of my morning searching for a js file that was supposed to build some graphs in a report page in this legacy system (still in active development) just to find it embedded inside a random .php file being included inside a wall of if-elses (that shit has around 100 lines) on the index.php (that somehow manages to route all the nonsense that's going on there).. was it really that difficult to make it a proper .js file? and actually import it on the page that is using it? c'mon...4
What's your favorite IDE to use and why?
I saw a little IntelliJ hate on another rant, but so far it has been pretty useful for me, I only need 1 IDE for Java/PHP/HTML/Python/JS/SQL
Pic unrelated, just for attention and the LOL's19
YES YES YES YES YES
GIMME SOME OF THOSE TYPED PROPERTIES <3
nowadays I can't live without them, it feels so safe and secure <3 <3 <317
A client is like: Help! We got a 500 in our wordpress administration panel and there is no error in the log, it must be your infrastructure at fault!
So I calmly replied to them that wordpress handles its errors on its own, and without the appropriate debug flags enabled, doesn't log it anywhere. Even mentioned that a PHP app can change the error handler no problem, and linked them to both, PHP and Word press docummentation.
Didn't hear from them since.3
I've invested so much time in PHP and now people are telling me it's rubbish ?? 😧😰😢😢
C'mon ! Trying to learn (or get familiar) with a whole new language now will basically mean I'm going back to square 1. That helpless feeling of being a beginner at something 😢
Name a more iconic duo than web developers on help sites and having pissing contests over which modules they use instead of actually answering the question!
I've been a web dev/server admin for all of about a month now, and only known PHP for about a week of that, and the one thing really that grates on me isn't PHP's odd function naming inconsistencies or at times outright trash documentation, it's the other developers who, when asked a fairly straightforward question about why a mysqli function won't return something, demand you use PDO instead.
Please. I'm running a LEMP stack on a Raspberry Pi here, I'm trying to keep dependencies to an absolute minimum because the SD card is tiny, the Pi will catch on fire if it runs any hotter, and more dependencies are more potential points of failure. Just answer the damn question. I'm not going to install PDO for something I know I can do anyway just because it makes my code look slightly prettier.
Honourable mention to all you Node.js developers out there too, with your thousands of useless npm dependencies. I salute you.8
My rant of the day is not being able to use the latest version of PHP with the latest features because my host only provides 5.6!9
It's rant time!
So, as a broke electrical engineering student, I got this job in a local company. They used JSF and my skills in java were, at the very least, small (former PHP developer). But as a self taught developer this didn't stopped me and I went full on java learning (very bad year for my EE studies).
I became the 'guy in charge' for several of their projects (yeah, they did exploited broke students, I realized this far too late). I was very proud of myself, I worked hard, showed my true value, and they became impressed.
One nice thursday night, my "handler" emailed me with a urgent request. They needed an entire jsf application done by monday and the requirements were fairly complex.
Oh boy, I had a total of 10h of sleep from thursday to monday. I didn't even slept before going to my monday class, but I delivered the system. Got an pat in the back... "you're awesome"... I was happy.
6 months later: I received an email asking to fix a bug in the system. No problem with that. Oddly, this bug was a MAJOR bug. There's no way the system worked properly for six months with it. I fixed it in no time and commited the changes.
Turns out that this was the first time the system was going to be deployed. They made me go in an insane weekend dev project, and didn't even used the system for SIX MONTHS!!! I started to work my way out the company after this, aiming to open my own software company.
I still remember some other rants from the time I worked there. But these are for later.
Nice week for you all, may the sprint go gently and the clients be kind.1
Spent around 5 hours last night trying to do honestly one of the most basic things in PHP with a classmate of mine.
We are making a website kind of like Google Photos where the user can upload their images, store some information about the images they uploaded. (Basically just an online photo storage site). For what ever damn reason we could not figure out why our images that the user would upload from a form where not being put into their associated user image folder; Hell for the longest time they weren't even being loaded onto our LAMP server.
We still have no fucking idea what made it start working, we went over our code and iterated it probably over a hundred times and suddenly..... Like I said we have no fucking clue why; it started to work.
Over 2 hours in a hangouts call and around 500 messages later it worked.
I think we all know how this feels.
What a fucking mess.5
For fucking fuck sake I fucking hate those dense motherfuckers with professor degrees from university. Lazy shmucks.
How, HOW, can you, as a sentient human being, force anybody to use Netbeans for the fucking final project? Two SOAP services, two REST services and PHP for communication? In Netbeans!? WTF. You didn't even teach us PHP for fuck sake. Why can't I choose technology I'm using!?
And to top it all of, Netbeans is the worst IDE I've ever used. I'd rather kill myself with a spoon than use for even one more project. How can ANY TEACHER use it for lectures and tasks? Using it teaches you fucking nothing, because it's generating code for you. It makes you braindead when you just look at it. It's works like shit and looks like shit.
I hope that devTea's swear-words blocker will have some fun with this rant.16
Hello everyone, first time ranter here! I have been studying Computer Science for 2 years starting September. The program introduced me to Java,HTML,CSS, JS and php. I feel like even though I am currently studying this I still do not "know" how to code. For example when I look at my classmates when they code it all seems so effortless and smooth, if they run into an issue they will usually solve it within the hour where as when I run into an issue I struggle to even see what the problem is. So the real point of this rant is, how do I improve? I am currently doing the #100daysofcode to get better but sometimes I feel so far away from calling myself a "developer" what is your road to the "developer" title? did you struggle as much as I am at the moment? or did you just sail into it like my classmates?16
rant & question
Last year I had to collaborate to a project written by an old man; let's call him Bob. Bob started working in the punch cards era, he worked as a sysadmin for ages and now he is being "recycled" as a web developer. He will retire in 2 years.
The boss (that is not a programmer) loves Bob and trusts him on everything he says.
Here my problems with Bob and his code:
- he refuses learning git (or any other kind of version control system);
- he knows only procedural PHP (not OO);
- he mixes the presentation layer with business logic;
- he writes layout using tables;
- he uses deprecated HTML tags;
- he uses a random indentation;
- most of the code is vulnerable to SQL injection;
- and, of course, there are no tests.
- Ah, yes, he develops directly on the server, through a SSH connection, using vi without syntax highlighting.
In the beginning I tried to be nice, pointing out just the vulnerabilities and insisting on using git, but he ignored all my suggestions.
So, since I would have managed the production server, I decided to cheat: I completely rewrote the whole application, keeping the same UI, and I said the boss that I created a little fork in order to adapt the code to our infrastructure. He doesn't imagine that the 95% of the code is completely different from the original.
Now it's time to do some changes and another colleague is helping. She noticed what I did and said that I've been disrespectful in throwing away the old man clusterfuck, because in any case the code was working. Moreover he will retire in 2 years and I shouldn't force him to learn new things [tbh, he missed at least last 15 years of web development].
What would you have done in my place?14
I am forced to use IDE and Text Editor against my will.
I hate eclipse, but what to do, Salesforce support that IDE only, although VSCode has one plugin for that, but it's not the best,
Why I hate Eclipse you ask?
1. Null pointers
2. No Emmet
3. No Autcomplete
4. Runs like shit on Windows 10 (See my last rant for windows 10)
5. no pretty print extensions/plugins for isml
For my personal projects I am forced to work on Sublime because again VSCode decided to drop
1. Syntax Highlighting
(Fuck you for hating php)11
I got a project to "refactor" some shitty site. It was written in nativ php. The guy who wrote this is a moron.
The site is so unsecure that my dog could broke into it while barking at cats.
It's sooo unreadable and illogical.
Every time i look at the code i get sadder and sadder. And now i understand why so many people hate php..
**Jump in time**
After i planned the new logic. My boss told me i can't do any of this. Because they only need a new user lever..
Now i just stare at this pile of horse sh*t and rant about it.4
I see a lot of jokes and memes about PHP. However, from the community conferences, I see that the community has matured so much compared to other communities. I truly respect and admire its community (at least the mature part of it).5
I was reading some google api docs and came across php function parse_str().
This function literally executes the passed string as php code.
Who the fuck in their right mind would even think of implementing it.
I knew php is widely hated language, but this thing is plain abomination.8
Recently was in a recruitment hackathon for leading technology company.
So, to test ppls networking, team building skill they grouped ppl into a team.
I was teamed up with noobs, and had very bad experience.
One guy in the team was arguing to use PHP for developing a web app.
Me : What PHP framework are u good at!?
He: what is framework !?
Me : like laravel etc..
He: no I meant we use plain PHP!
Me (mind voice) : go fuck yourself, I am bailing out , I Do not need the job
Me : It's ohk we only know NodeJs , so, gave a wierd smile
He was still arguing ,but I gave 0 f***
This is considered as a fight!?
Yeah not the worst though
Apparently the recruitment ppl liked him a lot in my team!2
Happiness is when someone continues your project and writes the code in similar manner like you did.
For PHP based ERP which is using MSSQL as database.
Another draw I found while cleaning my room. I made this on my last semester of the career at university.
Yeah, another Php. Remember the “Php elephant thong guy”? (Reference to another rant I posted) Here I’m fighting him with several programming languages. I remember that I made this because he only coded on php and jQuery, and I said to him “you’ll need to learn another languages if you want to apply to a new job”.
Which programming languages can you identify?
P.D. I don’t like PHP that much, I’d rather use Python or C#2
Hey guys. I have nothing to rant about the last few weeks.
I want to buy a book about advanced php. Cool ninja stuff I could do on backend... Do you have any suggestions for me?3
People who tell me they hate PHP, though when I ask said person whether he's used PHP all he can answer is "maybe once".
Don't hate on a language if you have barely even used it3
PHP + jQuery + Excel
I am facing the holy trinity or something.
Cool? eh? No no, not as cool as the holy trinit holding excalibur.
One of the info is Gender : Male, Female. And they state that we must export the excel with selected gender by drawing a circle over the choice.
Not Gender : Male
But Gender : (Male) , Female
Consider my bracket as circle.
They are not even in seperate cells. So now I am spending days to draw a fucking circle over a text in excel export using php. Still failing. FML.
* I control myself from asking for coding tips here but I will appreciate anyone who can help me out regarding the issue in this rant.13
Question for all the people who know bash around here. Is there a standard for bash scripting? Kinda how like PHP has the PSR standard. I've downloaded a couple of pdfs from various sites but none have been an actual standard.4
Keep this in mind: I don't like WordPress and PHP at all!!!
So a couple of days ago my boss asked me if I could extend a custom made WordPress plugin made by our intern. First thought: sure why not? Boss says: it has to be done in less than 100 hours of work (an estimate done by my boss and the intern). Me: I can't tell you that before I have seen the code and what functionality has to be in the extension. Boss: Cool, look it over this weekend and tell me if you want to do it or not.
I looked it through and my answer will probably be: NO WHERE IN HELL am I gonna are this in less that 100 hours! 1. no tests has been performed so I have absolutely no clue if his code works.
2. variable names are mostly: $string_query (whatever that means?), $result, $string_temp and so on.
3. Methods and functions are more than 250 lines long, with shitty formatting, and more comments than code. WTF?
4. The estimate has been made by an intern and my boss (doesn't know much about programming). I haven't been consulted about it....
5. No version control. No branches, no commits other than initial commit. Great.
6. Most comments in the code just tells me what I can read from the code. What it returns and what it takes as params. Can I please know wtf your method call named $booking->run () does? I still haven't found this method in the code after 1 hour of intensively looking for it...
FFS man... Not gonna do this, even though I thought it would have been an interesting project initially.
Sorry for the long rant... I just wish the intern would have consulted me about all this shit, since he obviously have bad practices. *sigh*6
!rant but seeking für help
So my boss came to me yesterday and asked me if I could do some penetration / security testing for a web application our company made.
Though I have some really basic knock edge of the subject (E.g SQLInjection) I was wondering if you know any good website / udemy course or whatever that can get me started.
I don't mind if there will be a certificate at the end but it is not necessary.
So following a previous rant, I’ve decided to make the jump and move full time to a Linux setup on my PC, with a windows VM (I do much more Ruby and php at home than Windows stuff, so makes sense to use Linux as everyday os.
The question that I need help with is which distro to go with.
I have experience with Ubuntu, OpenSuSE, and Debian, but I’m not adverse to trying something new, I’m even toying with the idea of Arch (but with a few test runs on a vm first)7
Upgrading. We like to upgrade our stuff, whether it's software, operating systems or hardware. When it works its great but when it dosen't...
All my BAD experiences have been with upgrading.
One day I was using Jumla (a CMS) that controlled a big online clothing store. Noticing that Jumla was 0.01 versions behind I decided to 'upgrade'. This caused the entire site to break, maxed out the space on the server and eventually lost my job and that day the company supposably lost $10,000.
Today's f#ck up made me write this rant. Me and a friend own a local development company and we have a small Digital Ocean server for client website previews (before they get there own hosting). We have a few projects going at the moment and yesterday we sent a few links to clients so they could see there new website. This morning I woke up, read a few emails and ssh'd onto the server to read logs and what not. I got a bit side tracked, reading about the benefits of Ubuntu 17. You can already see where this is going... I innocently Google: "How to upgrade to Ubuntu 17". Surprisingly after running the commands and downloading the updates it was worked well. Everything was working. Then I restarted. I waited about 15 seconds and tried logging in again. Timeout after timeout. Something was wrong. I checked the console via the online Dashboard and see a page full of Kernal errors. I contacted the hosting people and they were able to help by referring to some guides but after 5 hours of cranking through errors and not winning I give up.
*Email from client*
The website you sent via link isn't working, can you fix this as I would like to show our CEO,
I destroy the droplet (server), making a new one. I have to setup and secure the server. Generating new SSH keys, new user accounts as well as installing AND configure Apache, PHP and MYSQL. I then had to upload 5gb of backups via SSH (not fast), go through each clients backup, including web files and databases and distributing where it needs to go.
Discovering that one of the DB's name changed last week and therefore our backup script failed to save it, we were forced to rewrite 10 pages of website content.
From 10 yesterday morning to 2 this morning, a total of 14 hours (I think) sitting in front of my computer trying to fix a problem that would have never occured if I didn't "upgrade"8
I would like to rant one more time about my internship.
I began in July, the first. That's my sister who helped me to find this internship and I was a little scared about how bad it could be.
I came at the office, my boss told me that I would work in an "Innovation lab", an apartment where people works on projects that are less corporate than the enterprise's ones.
To me, it was amazing. So I came in this apartment, it was like a dream. I didn't know that I would have such luck to be in this environment : kitchen, sofas, beds, many decorations for all political ideologies, ideas. There was some decorations that were about weed and many cool things for the young guy I am.
The lab's leader told me that it was a very free environment and all the awesome stuff I could use.
Then they showed me where I would work.
We were two interns employed as web developers. We had a complete room for us.
Then we began to work there, and I was presented to my internship tutor.
He gave me some instructions but told me that I had a week before the project begin.
Here began the troubles.
We waited a complete week without having any instructions. Then we began to build something in PHP with our knowledge and the informations someone from the lab gave us.
When finally we had news from the project, two weeks later, we learned that the project would be built with ASP. NET.
Here we go, I learn ASP. NET alone. I have many problems and nobody helps (even if the problem comes from enterprise's API/Framework). I finally make something usable with no help, after I discovered that my mate wasn't developer at all and just took an option for her classes which forced her to get an internship.
She had 3 month left, I had 6.
Then when the project really began, nobody came to verify what I was doing and on a meeting, they said that I was doing nothing.
The boss even became mad on us because he couldn't see what we were doing (we're back end developers).
I asked for help to the developers of the enterprise and someone came, sad to have to help an internship, and learned some tricks but nothing else.
To have a concrete explanation of what DDD was, I had to ask 4 times for help.
Finally I had something that could receive data from the connected hives we are working on and store them into a database in the architecture of the enterprise.
Then, they wanted me to try an API for them. I tried, and it wasn't working at all. So they make me still wait to change my whole architecture when the API will be released.
Recently, I was told that I would never do the front-end of the project (which was an horror because of the fantasm of the lab leader). Then they realized that my late wasn't a programmer. So they asked me to make a prototype for the front-end. I did for a presentation.
Then they didn't tell me the device they would use for the presentation and it was an iPhone 7. Idk why, safari couldn't display what IE can.
They blamed me for having done a bad work. It wasn't my job. I did it to help because they can't find a fucking front-end developer with a little more experience than me.
Actually, I am an alone developer since my mate is gone and the lab leader don't want me to show up because she considers me as a shame.
I asked to be moved back in the office of the enterprise, they agreed and said it was a 2-weeks delay. It's the Thursday of the second week and I have no news. I send mails to my tutor, even SMS, he doesn't answer me. They didn't call me to give me my pay with a week late. And the person who is responsible doesn't answer me neither. I came to see her, but she wasn't available. I'm now alone in a desk, waiting the time to pass.
Fucking this shit.
I'm in France.
EDIT : I forgot to say that I can't use the sofas or bed because I'm allergic to cats and there were 3 cats. Now there is still one and this beast vomits and poos everywhere in the house...7
When you are testing your limits and you experience a "Warning: Unknown: 1 result set(s) not freed. Use mysql_free_result to free result sets which were requested using mysql_query() in Unknown on line 0"........LINE 0???????? WTF php? how the fuck do I fix a god damn line 0?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!6
Colleague asked me to look at his eCommerce search filtering system as the customer was complaining it was slow taking 5-6 seconds to find results.
Delving into the code deeper, I discovered he was querying the results, sticking them in an array and then sub querying the results looking at all the combinations.
On top of that each sub query looked at the database fields using "DESCRIBE" to then search them each time it found a pair!
The total query count for one page search was 14,512!!!
Why oh Why? One SQL query could of done all that in one go.
I look at other code bits he's done and he's very good in other areas. I just don't get how sometimes a good developer can make such a weird decision? It's almost as if he wanted to make it as complex as possible.6
Laravel is clean but slow
Codeigniter is fast but messy
Which one to choose?
Or are there any good alternatives?24
I had been working on the mess of custom-written PHP ecommerce site that was my internship. I had been reworking some code for two weeks and everything worked. Time to push to prod. Because who has heard of auto-deployment (I dumped the site in Git day 1), it was a manual process to identify new/modified/deleted files.
Naturally, this process is error-prone.
Within maybe an hour, we get a call from a customer about an outrageous charge. The site reported everything correctly, but his credit card alert was a different matter.
I discovered I missed one file in my changes that needed to be updated (why I missed it is another rant). Without this file, a customer would be charged 100x the total. In this case, a $40 purchase ended up being $4,000.
In fixing the issue, I also created a rounding error of $0.18 on the next transaction (thanks whoever thought it was a good idea to store money as a decimal instead of an integer).
On the same day, I also accidentally broke reports for 4 different people and had to quickly (in an ugly manner) patch them back in and ensure correct output throughout the day.
Oh, and all this happened on a Monday.
Talk about a strong fear of getting fired from my first webdev job that day, and an interesting conversation with my carpool home.4
I like how in one rant I'll read about someone who's tired of not reading any actual rants (The "Reee idk how to use the filters" people) and in the next someone's complaining about the the number of rants concerning XYZ (For example, PHP, JS, Semicolons)
You're just crusty bastards! There's no pleasing everyone5
Any (Magento) developers in Nottingham need a job ? no experience needed, although php knowledge is a must..
This is an actual rant because we can't find anyone..2
Ive been ranting a lot recently due to various tools and plugins not working as they should. lol.
At our company we where joking about how we should "fix" it, which was kinda blunt destroying it and picking something else to work with.
That gave me the little idea to make https://www.devhelpdesk.com/ which has various "topics" on how to do stuff.
Basically it is 100% satire.
If you like it, just check it out and use it ;). Ps I might be sort of buggy, Ive just build it in a few hours...1
First rant guys!
I'm a .net and PHP developer and love visual studio. I also hate windows 10 and it's stupid surprise reboots. Twice I switched to Linux mint but returned to windows because of the IDE. Been on VS (with PHP tools) for too long and nothing on Linux comes close to VS not to mention the lack of .net 4.6 (no mono) on Linux. M$ make Visual Studio 2015 cross platform!9
- Wrote a program
- Not working
- Had no idea
- Went to sleep
- Still thinking about what's wrong
- Realised I forgot ";" at the end of the line.2
I'm looking for another language to learn, (something different than the language I use at work)
Any suggestions? I'm currently looking towards python, but I am not sure yet14
It's going to be a long rant here and probably my fist rant ! And yes I am pissed up with a community growing in dev world .
There are so called framework experts who are so good that they can spin up a nodejs server with express and mongodb .
So to the people who bash on php , who bash down MySQL for no fuckig reason other than they have heard these are not so cool.fuck yourself incompetent piece of crap!!! I can hear all day about how algorithms and datsructure are not important form these people.fuck you because if you don't know /understand /want to understand the basics of computing how the fuck can your brain be trusted with anyting serious??If you can't write down proofs of basic / standard algorithms and till bash down on people who do those please fuck you because those are the people indirectly responsible for your Job so that u can work on fancy frameworks and cool IDE's .
Instead of whining down dedicate some time to your maturity and knowledge because that what we devs are all about.we like solving problems right?.
I repeat if you are anything like stating up it career in mid 20s maybe.leave everything if you can .Forget all fucking frameworks and technologies start with basics of computing, right at instruction level using assembly .Then move to a higher language when u know and reason about what your CPU is actually doing.
If you can't do that and keep on crying and bashing down things wihout proper explanations fuck yourself with a cactus .5
Meta devRant rant:
Everyday there's a rant that reads, "I don't care what others think but I love me some PHP because all the $ gets me $$$, it just works™!"2
The place I currently work at has got this culture of ignoring developers.
Deadlines get made by 3rd parties and project managers who don't have the technical nounce or experience of our system to make a call on deadlines.
Demos of products are arranged without a discussion with developers as to whether said component will be ready on that date.
3rd parties make decisions about future architecture, offer to assist, then disappear for days on end, to only come back and make out as though they've not been holding us up.
Upper management take no interest, don't listen to the people they pay to do a job.
Currently just moved a PHP web app into a multi tenant scalable EBS environment, but apparently it's not worth asking our view on technical aspects of the business before the shit hits the fan.
Lies to clients about documentation and policies, for example, claims from Sales we have a DR and BCP plan, client called is out, they sent a 2 paragraph A4 document to the client claiming it was our DR and BCP plan without talking to anyone technical, including myself who has years of DR experience. Embarrassing.
Could go on, but rant over.2
What are your thoughts or experiences with Ruby on Rails? Does it have a bright future?
I'm currently only using PHP for server-side web stuff, but looking for ideas for more beautiful languages.
I know C#, but because 95% of web servers I work on are Linux based, it's (as far as I currently know) not an option. Or is ASP.NET Core somewhat supported on non-root (basic hosting) linux servers?7
As I already said on devrant, I'm a freelance web developer and I also often sell my services for teaching, loving that. Currently I'm teaching PHP with 30 students and it's going very well.
But yesterday, I received an offer for giving another course next month, this time on HTML and CSS, for a company I don't know yet. Almost every line of this email is wrong, outdated by 20 years, or just basically meaningless...
So I thought I could do my best to translate this as close as possible to the original, preserving the wrong formulations too, just for you devranters fellas.
I have an offer for a 2 days course for 5 people (level 1+ and/or 2), on HTML5 and CSS3. Below, the program :
1. XHTML AND CSS2 INTRODUCTION
Advantages and benefits of change
Understanding compatibility for different versions of browsers
HTML, XHTML, CSS edition tools : presentation of the different tools
The CSS language : different types of selectors : class of selector, identifier of selector, contextual selectors, grouped selectors
Blocks of text, boxes of text
The CSS1, CSSP, CSS2 properties
Relative and absolute measures units
2. LAYOUT TECHNIQUES
Full CSS, XHTML websites demo
Positioning with the position property, positioning with the float property
Layout for forms
Layout for data tables
Layout for menus
3. INTRODUCTION TO SVG (SCALABLE VECTOR GRAPHICS)
Role and importance of SVG
Using SVG on client side : basic shapes
SVG structure of document, tags examples
Using CSS styles with SVG
Different integration methods for SVG in a XHTML document
Access to document objects : different access techniques, using this keyword, create elements dynamically
Show/hide elements for creating hierarchical menus
Code optimisation techniques : using objects, objects litterals, loops optimisation
Can you please give me your availability ?"
CSS-fucking-1 ! Is it a course for dinosaurs ?
...And if only my rant was just about the program...
It's totally impossible to cover all these subjects in only 2 days with people of different levels and experience.
The guy exactly said to me : "don't worry about the program, it's an old text but they agreed to it anyway. They just want to learn HTML and CSS, some of them already know it but want to learn more, and the others are total beginers.".
And here is the meaning for the "(level 1+ and/or 2)" part in the email.
So... Surprizingly, I accepted the offer, but asked for at least a 3rd day. I'm waiting for their answer, but I'll do it anyway, adapting the course content to the actual students knowledge. I need the money, after all.
Wish me luck...
It's just sad that these formation companies are selling bullshit to clients that just want to learn something useful. It's too often like that, they sell shitty/useless programs and we have to catch up in real time with students that don't understand why they don't learn what was told to them.3
It's been a while DevRant!
Straight back into it with a rant that no doubt many of us have experienced.
I've been in my current job for a year and a half & accepted the role on lower pay than I normally would as it's in my home town, and jobs in development are scarce.
My background is in Full Stack Development & have a wealth of AWS experience, secure SaaS stacks etc.
My current role is a PHP Systems Developer, a step down from a senior role I was in, but a much bigger company, closer to home, with seemingly a lot more career progression.
My job role/descriptions states the following as desired:
I am also well versed in various JS frameworks, PHP Frameworks, JAVA, C# as well as other things such as:
Xamarin, Unity3D, Vue, React, Ionic, S3, Cognito, ECS, EBS, EC2, RDS, DynamoDB etc etc.
A couple of months in, I took on all of the external web sites/apps, which historically sit with our Marketing department.
This was all over the place, and I brought it into some sort of control. The previous marketing developer hadn't left and AWS access key, so our GitLabs instance was buggered... that's one example of many many many that I had to work out and piece together, above and beyond my job role.
Done with a smile.
Did a handover to the new Marketing Dev, who still avoid certain work, meaning it gets put onto me. I have had a many a conversation with my line manager about how this is above and beyond what I was hired for and he agrees.
For the last 9 months, I have been working on a JAVA application with ML on the back end, completely separate from what the colleagues in my team do daily (tickets, reports, BI, MI etc.) and in a multi-threaded languages doing much more complicated work.
This is a prototype, been in development for 2 years before I go my hands on it. I needed to redo the entire UI, as well as add in soo many new features it was untrue (in 2 years there was no proper requirements gathering).
I was tasked initially with optimising the original code which utilised a single model & controller :o then after the first discussion with the product owner, it was clear they wanted a lot more features adding in, and that no requirement gathering had every been done effectively.
Throughout the last 9 month, arbitrary deadlines have been set, and I have pulled out all the stops, often doing work in my own time without compensation to meet deadlines set by our director (who is under the C-Suite, CEO, CTO etc.)
During this time, it became apparent that they want to take this product to market, and make it as a SaaS solution, so, given my experience, I was excited for this, and have developed quite a robust but high level view of the infrastructure we need, the Lambda / serverless functions/services we would want to set up, how we would use an API gateway and Cognito with custom claims etc etc etc.
Tomorrow, I go to London to speak with a major cloud company (one of the big ones) to discuss potential approaches & ways to stream the data we require etc.
I love this type of work, however, it is 100% so far above my current job role, and the current level (junior/mid level PHP dev at best) of pay we are given is no where near suitable for what I am doing, and have been doing for all this time, proven, consistent work.
Every conversation I have had with my line manager he tells me how I'm his best employee and how he doesn't want to lose me, and how I am worth the pay rise, (carrot dangling maybe?).
Generally I do believe him, as I too have lived in the culture of this company and there is ALOT of technical debt. Especially so with our Director who has no technical background at all.
Appraisal/review time comes around, I put in a request for a pay rise, along with market rates, lots of details, rates sources from multiple places.
As well that, I also had a job offer, and I rejected it despite it being on a lot more money for the same role as my job description (I rejected due to certain things that didn't sit well with me during the interview).
I used this in my review, and stated I had already rejected it as this is where I want to be, but wanted to use this offer as part of my research for market rates for the role I am employed to do, not the one I am doing.
My pay rise, which was only a small one really (5k, we bring in millions) to bring me in line with what is more suitable for my skills in the job I was employed to do alone.
This was rejected due to a period of sickness, despite, having made up ALL that time without compensation as mentioned.
I'm now unsure what to do, as this was rejected by my director, after my line manager agreed it, before it got to the COO etc.
Even though he sits behind me, sees all the work I put in, creates the arbitrary deadlines that I do work without compensation for, because I was sick, I'm not allowed a pay rise (doctors notes etc supplied).
What would you do in this situation?4
It was funny. But when I told the head of my dptmnt that I was getting bored at work they kinda freaked out. I really love my workplace. The people are nice everywhere and this is something I am not used to.
I started working when I was 13 at one of my dad's business. It was a lot of manual labor and every day my hands would be bruised because of all the cleaning and shit I had to do. Then he moved me to another one of his businesses and it was worse but I continued doing it for only 1 year. By 16 I had moved to simpler things, I was a waiter and even tho I hated it I was making enough money to go out on dates and buy whatever a 16 year old wanted. I continued being a waiter until I was 17(changed to two other places) and before I turned 18 I joined the U.S Army. That broke my body in ways that I would normally not believe a 18 year old capable of. It was around the time that I discovered programming but even after I left the military(at 22 I believe) I never worked on a programming job. Back at home I worked in retail. And believe you me....it is far more pleasant to be constantly getting blown up and broken than dealing with the most retarded people imaginable(this is what made me hate Mexican people even tho I am Mexican myself)
Fast forward at 23 and I landed my first programming jobs. As stated in other initial rant it was surrounded by assholes. Assholes everywhere that would cower at the idea of speaking to me face to face due to the possibility of being left as physically broken as I am.
But at 27 now I found myself in a happy place. With nice people, good coworkers, an amazing manager that also serves as eye candy and good benefits. But the job is boring, boring beyond belief and this is due to the fact that they have a self taught and academically trained computer scientist doing the most menial things on a daily basis. The shit that I do would be more becoming of a designer, which has a different set of mental skills that would probably engage them more. But I really don't want to work on the web unless I am doing something that actually takes some challenge, even tho I maintain Java and PHP web services, the shit is so boring that anyone would be able to finish the proceadures in hours on a day leaving one with nothing engaging to do. Sometimes I let shit get close to the deadline just to feel some sort of pressure that would keep me awake.
I just wanted to vent on how ceremoniously BORED i really am.
I want more shit to do. Can't really have much patience for the freelance shit since it doesn't make sense to hire me in exchange of having some indian dude doing it for a quarter of the price.4
!rant: How can it be that in a dockerized PHP application running on localhost, only ONE of the sub pages tries to load in via https? it literally said https://localhost/pagename in the browser. Nothing in the Nginx conf file says anything ssl related. Neither does, to the best of my knowledge, does it state anywhere (in the DB, code, you name it) to use SSL at all. Consider me stumped.5
2nd rant this week on PHP PDO
PHP message: SQLSTATE[HY000]: General error: 2014 Cannot execute queries while other unbuffered queries are active. Consider using PDOStatement::fetchAll(). Alternatively, if your code is only ever going to run against mysql, you may enable query buffering by setting the PDO::MYSQL_ATTR_USE_BUFFERED_QUERY attribute
THATS WHAT I’M FUCKING USING. STOP FUCKING COMPLAINING. YOU DIDN’T LIKE THE FUCKING COLONS FOR YOUR FUCKING PARAMATETRS, NOW YOU HATE YOUR OWN FUCKING FETCHALL() METHOD YOU PEICE OF SHIT, AND YOU CAN’T HAVE ANY OTHER ACTIVE QUERIES AS IT’S THE FIRST FUCKING QUERY. ARRGHHH!!!!!
What the actual fuck is wrong with PDO. It bitches about everything 😡.8
the most popular ecommerce solution in php is a massive (cosmological scale) pile of corporate crap (magento) and the next most popular is an abomination (opencart)
after fucking around with both for a month (the client asked for the project to be using only one of the two) I'm still barely reaching any results, and most of my time is wasted with the stupid bloated spaghetti that is opencart FUCK THIS,
like seriously. who the fuck writes a single line three left joins sql querry with four or five aliases a couple concacts and a bunch sorting fuckeries just to query the categories list, then just query the details of the specific category from a different function,
also why the fuck map each language string manually. or the fucking hardcoded seo urls, or the use of myisam for all tables, and no fucking foreign keys, let that settle for a minute, no foreign keys, the delete method in the model has at least a twenty lines, and then he came with the genius idea of duplicating models, in the front and the backend, accessing the same data, as the same user, but different naming conventions
I'm going to convince him to use something sane like codeigniter/laravel/fuelphp or I'll deny the project8
TL;DR one year on as a react dev, I want to go at it self employed, humbly seeking advice as this community seems to have its fair share of knowledgeable freelancers.
I have 1 year professional experience now as a Meteor, React and Apollo developer
The dream is to become self employed. I figure a good market would be small businesses that want a website that are more featureful than a diy wix site.
Only I am more of a developer than a designer, so rely heavily on things like Bootstrap or Material ui. So I wonder if Upwork, Fiverr or simply my own freelance website would be better.
Also want to build own projects on the side to monetize. Bigger dream would be to be client-less and develop and sell personal projects.
Seeking advice from those who are self employed. Am I dreaming too big?
Shall I keep the office job for a bit longer then take the plunge? Or do you think I can just go for it. Are there lucrative areas I am missing?
Thanks in advanced8
Guys, Im curious, what you would say about situation if you are in need of some quite simple tool and you write it but becouse you need it today, not tommorow, you just dont give a heck about all the fancy stuff and (lets say for php) you start to write all in 2-3 files like you was back beginner?
Or you just nope out of situation?
Do you refactor that when you bored just becouse this cant be on my disk, noone can see this abomination?
Or you delete after usage (only to relaize 5 minutes latter you need it back :P )
Im curious your opinion.
nope, if you came to bitch about any of opinions even opinion "well, i wouldnt give a fuck and just not do it", go away and get lost.
Types of elitists in the computer science area I REALLY HATE:
* Linux kernel developers: if they hear anything that's not linux you will be prosecuted
If anyone here remembers the first 2 part rant story I posted then you will know that I got unceremoniously laid off by a company that tried to blame me for their bad decissions at one point
Well, a couple of days ago I found out that the senior dev and the owner took a trip to San antonio tx in order to try and look for growth opportunities and more developers. The thing is, being a Mexican company they thought they could go away with half assed solutions and mexican pay charts (to them it is completely reasonable to pay a dev with a degree and experience close to 13.99 an hour) just to find out that shit like that does not fly with American professionals. After I left, no one would monitor their .net implementations , the lead developer being a new php developer himself and not knowing much about .net had to take care of much of the things they had to work with, their API made no sense and it was damn near impossible to connect their services to a mobile platform unless you had ninja like skills and ingenuity.
I hold no grudges and really wish them the best, but it pleases me to know that they know now that their way of doing things is not standard in the U.S. now that makes me happy.
First Happy new year, now lets get put on the dancing shoes... (I have another one coming, but this one is fresh)
As a PHP developer (yeah I am and I like it, if you gonna hate on me... go fuck yourself) I expect to not be required to reinvent the wheel when I have to use something that is not too mainstream (in my case was producing JSON and XML HAL responses). Now there are 2 (fairly active and somewhat mature), one of which does not produce XML responses, so off I went with the other one, but for fucks sake it does not produce XML that is compliant with the (draft)RFC (https://tools.ietf.org/html/...)
So as I need that, I decided to write one myself, since extending the one that provided XML would've been a waste of time, since it is NOT documented and for some reason depends on about 4 packages (also developed by the same maintainer), why the whining you ask, eh? Well fuck this shit. It took me 2(+2 classes) to achieve everything (according to standard as far as I can tell) + went with using a "hydrator" as opposed to reflection (the lib used reflection and didn't care too much for the access modified on the property of the object being serialized) so got a pretty solid performance boost, cleaner and simple code (I wrote it for a few hours and it is ugly, but hey KISS and it works perfectly)...
So with the more ranty part of this rant... Why the fuck so many people don't write independant packages for the simple parts... I don't hate it when I need a package and end up downloading half of the codebase of symfony or whatever fancy framework the dev decided to use, wasn't it the point of having 'package managers' (composer, npm, etc.. you get the deal..) instead of promote our projects and not force others to use our favorite framework that is absolutely out of scope for their projects...
Fuck you, fuck me and fuck everybody... If this continues I will continue writing my own packages from scratch, because "you" asshole are too lazy to learn and apply SOLID and common sense; even if your life depends on it you cannot write a meaningful piece of code without "the fancy framework of the month" holding your hand and allowing you to continue being a dumbass that has enough brain cells to walk straight and remember that you have to go to the toilet and not shit all over the place....
FML.... Fuck this shit and that is the main reason my gears grind the most when I head "you should use *framework name* instead" or "don't reinvent the wheel", fuck that guy I refuse to work my ways around a framework in order to get things done, my boss aint happy for that shit you know, I don't get paid to deal with your crappy code or uninformed opinion..3
Do you guys know any website that challenges you into coding little programs (for me, php) to solve problems ?
I mean, it would be to train my skills with actual kind of real world problems, not just hello worlds or simple "how-to" codes.
I signed up to a contest recently and I felt really dumb not to be able to find solutions faster or with more efficiency (FYI : I was ranked 1049/2300 all languages included :( )11
On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me!!!!
An error in PHP!!!
You'll get your next one on the second so you can rant at me!4
Alright sit down boys this is gonna be a good tale (also a long one).
I'm currently developing a wordpress site for a Client. Everythings works well enough, I had a few "wtf is this shit" moments. Now we decided to give him access to the wp site so that he can see and change (I know, I know don't judge me pls), so I set up tunneling with ngrok, but that PIECE OF SHIT WP DIDN'T WORK ANYMORE. You asking why? Oh I'm telling you why, wp uses ONLY absolute paths. Well fuck, I ain't gonna touch that piece of shit php code, so I installed a plugin and shit was working.
In short, after a few fucking HOURS that shit finally worked. Well that would be a great fucking end for our little tale right? Yeeeeaaah no, I shit you not, it gets even better!
After a few days my client gets back at me that he can't enter fucking wp-admin to work on the text an stuff (again pls don't judge me for granting him access to the backend of wp during development). So I checked it out and that piece of shit didn't work. If anyone would happen to know why, I would be grateful bc for the love of spagetti monster I HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE!
So I said to myself well fuck this shit and put it on a webhoster. Uploaded all the files, and migrated the db. Sounds like it finally worked right? Well guess again buddy. So I needed to go to the database, updated values manually for wp to have the correct url and then still needed to force it to refresh every fucking link.
As it finally works now, this tale is also finished then and I really hope that part 2 is never ever comming!
Sorry for the (somewhat) long rant but this is some next generation bullshit.
I am a good person. I can even say I am a good programmer. I have worked hard to get where I am and that shows perseverance. Although, where I am right now is not what I expected, I am somewhere. I can do something. I have good intentions.
Someday, I will build software which will be used by millions of people around the interwebs. And they will love me, for I will have made their lives better....in some way. Some will even consider paying me for it. Not because the well placed and non intrusive donate button I put there, but out of pure adoration and bare necessity to preserve someone as brilliant and precious as me. I shall be the definition of success. But I long for neither adoration nor wealth, for I am humble or at least that is how I will be perceived.
Like flies to the honey my success will attract big evil corporations to acquire my business. And I shall spit on their wretched face....at first. I would like to be wooed. Such display of integrity shall inspire generations of programmers. Let ye be inspired. There will be those who envy my achievements and they will be mocked and shunned by my true believers. But being the kind soul that I am, I will bring back my minions, for it could a PR nightmare.
All these events will take place in a not too distant future. Sure, I am going through a dark time now, it will pass. 'tis nothing but me transitioning from a lame ass PHP coder moth to this totally badass software engineer who is also a cool bro. This eclipse of my brain shall pass. My neurons will fire in all directions like photons from the sun during late winter, for it may overheat and we definitely don't want that.
I pray to the gods of engineering to grant my wishes. Trust me guys, you will be thanking yourselves when donate my money to charities that will help me set up. But that's another scheme. Amen.4
First rant here..
So earlier this week, on a php Laravel project, I created a set of nice new features.
The code is tested, locally all fine, I push to Github, circleCi kicks in and double checks myself, still everything green. (Just for a not, its a private project so only I work on it.)
I go ahead and merge, deploy to staging and continue on my next ticket, which is a very small one.
I call it the day, next day I pick back up where I left, test locally, all green, push... then circleCi says no.
I spend 2 days debugging, trying to figure out what is wrong without advance. I just push develop branch again, guess what also failing.
I leave it for the day as I already spend enough time on it.
This morning, I simply do a composer update, push and everything miraculously starts working.. even if there were no changes in the working branches.
Im so mad right now, and this is going in my "try this before you debug a ci" book..2
The rant starts here....
die() function from PHP, it's like Hitler shouting, "if you can't solve the problem remove the source of the problem"
Dev rant needs to work more on their algos to show rants! Since I posted one bout php , every other rant I see is bout php now and I think I just shot in my feet with this rant 😂oh whatever.5
"Our supplier asks that you double the number of php child processes for this fpm pool"
"Are you aware, that that would lead to about 100% of memory overcommit, taken the current limit of 128MB/child, and that if a lot of them started at once, the system would probably go for OOM-Kill, which would most probably kill your database, that still runs on 100% MyISAM tables that do not support transactions, and you'd have to kiss your data integrity goodbye, right?"
"Uh... Nevermind then"
I get that some people are not IT-versed, but really... Hire someone who knows what they are doing and doesn't live 20 years in the past, god damn it!
Had to build an app using Cordova because... well, I am a web dev and know a shitload of PHP and a good part of JS, but no Swift or Java or whatever.
So there is a deadline set to like half a year after we had the initial talk with the customer. 6 months to build a relatively easy and small app.
So yeah, I procrastinated like one would do when he's got that kind of time left and not much else to do.
And yeah, I did work, but also procrastinated some more. The development was as expected, and I was well in the anticipated time frame.
Then I got a really bad disc prolapse and was sick at home and the hospital for (all together) 5 weeks.
After that, I came back to work for a week, then leaving for a (previously planned) vacation with my little family.
On my first day back at work after the vacation, I quit my job with a 6 weeks notice, of which I have to work 3 weeks.
I know it sounds like I'm a real prick, but it was never planned this way. I never searched for a new job. It just came to me.
I am still finishing the app, though :)
Why am I telling you this?
Well, I do that to show that there still are great bosses out there. My boss has NEVER spoken a bad word to me, even after I quit my job. He's always been kind, fair and understanding.
I just wanted to show that between all these rants about bad bosses and colleagues (which I have had my fair share of in the past), there still are some real gems out there.
Gotta my my boss - he's been one of the best I have had so far.
Peace out folks. Good night...
This is how PHP refers to :: internally, it's the only fucking token with such a weird name, what is this fucking language?
Who is writing this shit? OOP but it's completely optional? Where is the goddamn sheriff? I'm done, off to Ruby, Python, Go or anything that's not fucking PHP. Sick of this shit. Fuck this language.
How can such a massive language be so poorly designed!?3
!rant had my yob interview today, i hope i left a positive vibe, they want me to meet de other devs to evaluate my level of skill. Pray for me i'm good enough for their custom php management tool3
It's my first rant. So please ++1 me.
Now my rant:
In this semester I had a subject about system architecture. In this class, we must learn Java script, C# (and ASP.NET framework ), PHP (and Zend Framework 2), but in the classes is taught only UML and patterns. In the moodle of the subject we don't have any information about any of the languages and if we ask the teachers they don't know anything.
So we are all fucked10
Okay, it's FUCKing rant time.
FUCK single-file *cough* page.tpl.php *cough* drupal-sites
I FUCKing hate sites without any FUCKing structure, where all logic is built into the overall wrapping pageview file.
Spend more FUCKing time than healthy finding this golden nugget.
In a FUCKing 2000+ lines long file, in a FUCKing mix of inline CSS/JS, PHP/SQL and FUCKing exec(); calls.
Definetily the best FUCKing way to destroy a FUCKing lightbox, for people who are not logged in...
- Why would you even do that in the first FUCKing place ?!??! The customer didn't ask for this..
All this FUCKing mess because the previous developer decided to quit, and did not FUCKing care for the next maintainer to come.
Fellow drupal developers will know the struggle.3
SoundCloud Go+ Failed Big Time, So This Was Expected. Still Came As A Shock. Pentabytes Of Music, Just Vanishing?
Anyway, A Great Opportunity For Spotify To Completely Vaporize Their Only Competitor!14
Teacher: good job on the first project I assigned you to do. Now do the same project but use JSP instead of PHP.
BTW, is it true that programming in JSP is like programing in Java? Or at least similar?9
For a bunch of application redesigns that we are doing at work I am letting the other two developers in my department help with selecting the stack. Normally, we work with Java and PHP, and while they seem to enjoy php I find them concerned at the possibility of making it more Java centric.
So I compiled a list of examples of different tech stacks that are not only more modern (cuz our Java stuff is old JSP stuff) but also simple to learn and use. Mind you, the point is to make this a gradual change, not just rewrite the entire house from scratch.
the list contained examples in:
Python: django and flask
Ruby: Ruby on Rails
Java: Spring Boot
Golang: Small self made mvc framework I built, nothing fancy on it, it uses templates and shit, didn't make it api centric
Node: Express examples in both vanilla JS and TypeScript
php with Laravel.
Since we work with php most of the time as well I imagined that they would be more inclined for Laravel, but I was wrong :P they seemed to like the Node Express route and the Golang route more than anything else with Python and Django being close.
Personally I know that there is more to selecting a stack, but initial perceptions make for a lot of things in selection of the stack.
Pretty excited, if they gauge everything considered in regards to what we have and we found Golang to be a clear winner it would give them the chance to add a nice and competitive tech to their resumes.
not a rant, or anything per se, just wanted to share some stuff with y'all2
So, recently new CTO joined.
And suggested to migrate our entire platform on GO from PHP.
And all dev teams will get new macs.
Its gonna take more 3-4 months so.
Kind of exicted to work on.7
I don't really get people liking PHP. Everyone I personally talk to seem to hate it, and always when I work with it I am struggling quite a bit.
What's the awesomeness behind PHP that apparently many people can't be able to understand or appreciate?16
Completed a project in summer for a client based on Laravel and kept working on other projects based on same framework. Today went back to add some functionality ended up feeling miserable looking at my own code. Don't know how to feel about this.3
So I kept running into permission problems last night when trying to use move_uploaded_file() in php to upload images to my virtual server. Maybe today I'll finally figure it out.
After more than one year of searching for a dev job and finally working for some call center for one year cause I couldn't find any job who wanted to take me without any diploma, I finally got one as a php dev I'm happy but at the same time I stress cause I don't want to make any mistake and be fired. I'm starting Monday whish me good luck. I don't know if I'm more excited or more stressed I will know Monday.4
I'm astounded. I just took a crack at some PHP logic that would be easy for a lot of you but hard for my math-and-logic-challenged brain.
The first time.
I built a webinterface a few months ago. it was based on the php framework laravel. but i want to change to nodejs in combination with mongodb.
do you know good nodejs mvc frameworks similar to laravel?3
Okay I'm back to Dev Rant tho it still looks new and confusing sometimes, maybe because I'm new to programming world. Well I need some type of advice , I like web development, I started learning PHP (I know it an old language but it all I can help myself with, by learning). Is there any thing I'm missing? Any link on improving my skills ?
I will be glad to learn a lot from the senior developers on here . I really want to go wide into programming I'm ready for the challenges because I know the path isn't always easy!!
Thanks in advance10
I built my first web server literally from scratch (standard socket lib) today! In Python <3.
It is able to execute php and get the stdout to use it in the Python script afterwards and make use of parallel connections.
Now to the real rant...
I am using HTTP/1.1. I want to use h2 (aka HTTP/2) tho. I am stuck on this. Found the papers to the specs of the h2 and spdy protocols, but they are not really helpful.
Is anyone good in this field? Please let me know :/3
Alright, epic throwback to high school
-So I'm taking this CS course on java
-Teacher seems legit
-Knows his shit
-Gets the job done
-Introduces the class to an IDE
-I whip out my Eclipse Oxygen (with Hello World preloaded, obviously) like the nerd I am
-Literally the worst editor ever
-And teacher somehow expects us to work in it with git
For those of you who have never worked with BlueJ, thank God you haven't.
What new languages should I learn? I'm working on C++, but PHP seems fun...11
I am quiet these days although I had few materials to write about. Like my journey of devdesk. I bought a proper chair. New mouse and got a mechanical keyboard. Work is fine but it is definitely not lack of rant-worthy moments. I had deactivated my Facebook and I wasn't that active on any other social network from the start. So all the more reason for me to be active here.
But turn out I'm not. I was thinking about it and this is my outcomes.
1) I'm focusing more on my tasks after adoption and practicing pomodoros technique. Hence using devrant lesser.
2) My right hand was literally unusable and unmovable for two times in past 5 weeks. Hence using phone lesser.
3) There was that notifications bug period and I thought people were just quiet like me. Hence more reasons to be less active.
4) devRant algo is good but not smart. It knows that I have a relation with PHP. But it doesn't know that I don't hate PHP. >>> How many times a week can you listen/ignore to people saying "Hey your wife is a silicone doll?" Fuck you. I know. But I'm married to my silicone doll. So fuck off. <<< PHP is just an example. I literally close devrant whenever I see "(noun) is (something negative)" posts.
My hand will fully recover soon. (I do hope so). My tasks will not always be super overwhelming. The app's bugs are getting fixed.
However I have a doubt about the last point.
Is it just me or PHP errors(if there are any) make more sense if you try to read them kind of backwards?9
TLDR; read the last alinea, my train just arrived and I am typing this after the resr of the rant
So lately there's been a lot of hate on here to PHP, which for now I'd say feel offended if you want to, but fuck all of the guys hating on a language without personal experience or even just plain "I used it for a week or less"-experience.
Noticed I said "a", yes I am not just talking about hate on PHP. It's pretty much the stupidest thing one can do, exclude a programming language you might like more than you will think at this moment. I present to you; My first few weeks of internship last year.
So last year I had to find a company to do an internship at with two classmates, none of them replied with a come over for a talk except a company mainly working in Laravel (PHP).
All of us didnt like php at the time, me possibly even hating it the most, but that didnt keep us from taking the leap of faith and just going to the company for a talk, I mean it couldnt hurt right?
So after the talk we had a place for an internship, which we all thought we were all going to hate, because of PHP.
Now a few weeks into the internship (3 / 10 weeks I'd say) we had basically just gotten done with the first setup of the project we had to build. And we noticed after a good 2 or 3 weeks that it didn't feel like too much of a different language.
Personally I even found it better than C# or Java, which were the only other languages I knew at the time.
Now keep in mind I still like C# and Java, allthough guven the chance I'll choose PHP everyday over both.
But I learned more things I was expecting to learn those 10 internship-weeks, with the one thing I am writing about being the main focus:
Stop hating, try the language out for at least a week (yes 5 * 8 hours) and then make an educated decission based on your findings throughout the week, you might be surprised...6
!rant but question to you experts:
Hey, guys. I'm currently trying to up my game in terms of web development. I already know js, html, php and css quite well (enough to become a tutor at my university) but I'm not shure which frameworks (serverside and clientside) are worth considering. Until now I wrote everything from scratch, which is not very sustainable (waaaay to much code to maintain)
Could you please tell me your softwarestacks, what library to use, which frameworks to learn (Vue/React/Angular/...)? Every opinion is very appreciated and won't go unheard. Thanks in advance.
btw: you guys are the nicest people I ever met online. Thank you for being so awesome.1
The bane of my existence:
Closing lines in PHP. Always accidentally miss one or two out and then go playing hide and seek with them.4
im not a php fan. like NO.
then i know this very rant runs php somewhere.
having mixed feelings right now 😐6
There was a rant earlier of someone working a 9 to 5 job now which i can't seem to find, wanted to answer in regards to wk26
They were complaining about it being a boring job with boring processes and not learning anything new..
you can't say that you haven't learned something new, i bet you haven't learned a new language or technology but there are plenty of other skills to be picked up from a company that have worked for this all their lives..
I mean, these kind of companies have either seen it all already and had tons of bad experiences they are trying to avoid, or then never experienced any of them but are still trying to avoid them.
I once worked for a Japanese company in Europe. All decisions (big or small) were taken by answering with the phrase : If it isn't broken, don't fix it. As a result they had an excel with over 64k complaints in them (1 row per complaint) and their website was running on 19 Sun servers, load balanced, using php 4.2 because the technology was just too old.
Point being, plenty of things to learn, getting new experiences, even if they are bad, at least now you know, how not to do things in a certain way, but all in all, working at different places, even bad ones, gives you perspective..
And perspective is important.
Perspective is experience.
It's the bit that glues the knowledge together.
Go out and explore, don't be afraid, everyone needs bad experiences, even if it was only so we can identify the good ones.
It stands for PHP Hypertext Preprocessor? The definition of itself is a stack overflow?
Also, (1+1) . 2 = "22"?
Showing a php and dual-boot guy the anti-php and anti-window posts might be an intentional algorithm. We never know. 💀
TL:DR linux newbie, looking for advice/links (skip to bottom for questions)
After i had been looking for a job for quite some time, a couple of months ago i got hired by "smaller" company doing web stuff. So far it have been a great place, good colleagues, and overall just having a great time!.
They seem to value me alot, so that's great!.
Anyway, yesterday i got called into a meeting - and got told they wanted me to start learning "Server stuff (linux)". That got me quite excited, because it always was something i wanted to learn - but never really got around to doing.
But i never touched a linux installation before, so i'm really on ground zero - but im not afraid, i'm a quick learner and quite efficient at googling :)
I figured i would ask here, since other people here always seems to be happy to help other people out.
So far i have manage to setup a server, install various stuff (php, mysql and so on) and done setup a couple of domains/subdomains on my server. Also got a vestacpinstallation working - so overall im quite happy so far.
I figured maybe somebody had some good links/advice for a linux newbie :).
* Performance/Security, will obviously be a big focus - anything i should look at? - any must look at?
* Monitoring tools, how do i monitor various websites running on my server? Here i'm thinking bandwitch, cpu/ram usage and so on pr site basis.
* Any other stuff i should be looking at?
Little about what the server will/should be running :)
* WordPress installations only (e-commerce mainly)
* PHP 7 / MySQL / phpmyadmin5
So, this is a story of me leaving my current job. I am in a maintenance PHP project. I usually love PHP but I hate the way this project is done, therefore I hate this project
Now, see the attitude change in people when they come to know I will no longer be there:
> 7:49 AM : *gets a mail without context with some photographs*
> 9:00 AM : *I leave for my doctor's visit which is once in 3 months*
> 10:00 AM: I see, still no email with context, well, I'll go back to sleep
> 12:00 PM: I see, *gets an email from the manager*, so you want this news to be updated with these new images
At this point, I deliberately postponed the task, because I am salty because you are sending images with no context.
> 3:00 PM: Okay, this is done. *send e-mail, WhatsApp, and hangout to the manager that task is done*
> 3:08 PM: Post a rant on devRant!5
So first rant, here goes weirdness, and also lengthy rant
So in my company we have the hr and accounting managed by the same person which also deals with all things employee related and she had a need for a way to extract a birthday from, what is in our country the personal identification number, things go great i get a formula that performs parts of the magic up to the point where the first digit of the number dictates the gender and century to be used when forming the full year, mind you only the last two digits of the year are in plain within the id number so i thy a number of ideas. After bashing around google sheets for a while ( i've got open office installed and formulas don't export well to the excel that person uses but google sheets does so i built it there).
First idea : make a few conditionals to check for the value so we have 1 and 2 for 19th century, 3 and 4 for 18th century , 5 and 6 for 20th so i go ahead and write my conditions and they fail, all evaluates to false, it cascades through the else variants up to the last one so i'm wondering if the "if" itself doesn't support the or operator, seems it does, next i think it's the bloody condition written wrong so i reevaluate my logic in php in a test script, it works as intended, then i think ok not the right function called, let's see the docs, docs confirm i'm doing it right but what was wrong was the way i was getting that first number, using left seems to produce a string although the base thing is a number, now i start searching how i can cast it, like you would normaly do when the data type is fried, value function appears to be the solution but it isn't working....now i'm thinking "ok so i have a value and different things to print out so let's look for a switch, maybe it can understand that" switch function found under the form of choice, i get it sorted but am stuck wondering why the heck was the if and value combination not working.
Simple answer to that : value doesn't work well with function results, a known bug listed by someone in a comment, a comment i have failed to read for about 45 minutes of trying to understand.
All in all it worked well for the person asking for it so it's nice.
TL;DR: New(-ish) dev looking for advice to improve workflow and new languages. Hopefully worth a read though :)
I want to learn more, technically-applicable languages.
My setup is barebones (to a Linux diehard's eyes), with a gaming laptop that I do a lot of workstation stuff on, an RPi 3 B that I do some Linux-y stuff on, and a less-powerful Development Laptop (that I call a devtop) that I occasionally do work away from home on.
I'm sure most will cringe and weep at my workflow, as I use Windows 10 on both systems and the standard NOOBS software on the pi, and I use Brackets as my text editor, as well as the XAMPP AMP stack for testing.
My biggest questions are what could I do to improve my workflow, and what languages should I learn/apply myself to for real-world application (such as Node.js for live-updating server-side applications or C# for Windows applications)?
Thank you for taking the time to read this, any feedback is helpful! I'm just a high school student with a lot of enthusiasm for development!6
I just made my API in my laravel and I understand how it works! It may seem like not a lot, but I got from far.
Just came two years ago in this industry as I worked as a customer service agent for a hostingcompany. I entered a whole new area what I immediatly got into at the time. Mind I already was studying Biomedical labresearch at the same time and was the IT guy in the family. Well, think back then I was just googling and fixing shit most of the time.
I was 21 at the time and began to learn everything I could learn in my position and soon it was not enough and wanted to learn more by working parttime(study already asks a lot of time). I soon applied as Junior System Engineer within the same company without prior education and got the job! And I'm back feeling I entered a new area where you feel you can do so much by just learning how it works. Now I want to learn to develop in PHP so I may make another step further.
Not a rant, but I want to share my experience as labrat starting to someting programming(did some bio-informatics, which was really interesting but with less emphasis on programming but more on data analysis). Still got a gigantic of list I want to learn from languages and frameworks to orchestration systems.
This is story and not a rant about my journey in programming. I've left out some details ofc, some of which I couldn't remember and some I got too lazy to add. They're not that important so I omitted them. There may be a lot of errors but it's almost 3 am and I cba. I'm tried but yeah, just decided to share something because it's been a while. I would also like to hear you guys' journey as well. Maybe they might inspire someone, who knows 🤷🏿♂️.
I had a thirst of learning more about computers and how they worked when I was around 13. I started looking into web development because I was really curious how websites worked. I started using cms's like web.com, enjij.com and any other cms I could find back in 2011 to build websites just to get a basic knowledge. A year later I picked up programming because I wanted to start making them by myself from scratch. I did some research and found websites that teach you how to start. I used codecademy and YouTube to teach myself the basics of web programming. It was fine for a while until I got bored and wanted more. I found out about php and it's capabilities. so I learned that using the same methods. I built sites for my Minecraft server, a small e-company I wanted to start and social media sites just for fun. I struggled with bugs and issues of course but that made it fun. The late nights trying to fix them or the late nights where I burst with ideas and was just coding. it was bliss. I wanted to expand my knowledge and tried learning Python but I felt overwhelmed back then and took a break. The years go by, I still made websites using php, js, html and css. I improved my skill with them. Now using OOP, writing sleeker and better code and my web designs improved massively as well as my MySQL abilities. It was time for me to graduate and I wanted to go into computer science but because of how much time spent programming, I fell back on my classes and just barely managed (albeit it wasn't the only reason, I slacked and didn't care because I felt hs was too easy for me at first). I instead went on to do a game design course in Toronto Film School and that's where I learned c# for unity and a little bit of c++ (this shit is so hard bro, I couldn't keep up and I've forgotten most of it). Fast forward, I graduate with decent grades and can now make some pretty nice games. I took a year off after that to look for jobs but as you know, you need experience and it's not easy to get those. I tried making an android app and got stuck with a very simple but that took 4 months to fix and then I burned out. I also lost my programming motivation partly because I felt like I wasn't making anything unique and meaningful. I felt empty so I quit for a while. All my plans fail and I decide to go back to school to upgrade the marks I needed and either do comp sci, mechanical engineering or stem. I forgot to mention btw that my goals shifted from just programming to being an inventor. Anyways, I boosted my grades and I did superbly so I can go into anything I want now. Currently just waiting for my acceptance letter while learning Python again along with react, SharePoint and a few other things to boost my skills and knowledge. I'm slowly getting my mojo back and it's really fun. But yeah that's my journey 😁1
Dev: Now that I finally know PHP and JS it must be really easy to find a good framework and use to build my beautiful website.
The options are limited: AngularJS, ReactJS, Ember, ActivateJS, BackboneJS, ExpressJS, Laravel, RactiveJS, Node.JS, Meteor, Knockout, Symphony, Codeignitor
And yes, you thought if you don't like AngularJS you can easily switch to ReactJS. But guess what, every framework will use their own scripting languages like Jade, Blade, Typescript making it learning something new extremely smooth.
The documentation will be part of another rant3
I'm a rather young developer, self-learned everything and started when I was 13 (now 20) but I still feel like I'm a total beginner since I have not yet mastered the things I am OK at.
Php (laravel, since it makes things much easier), js (jquery, bad at vanilla, have used angular and ember but not mastered), node, linux, html, css, photoshop, illustrator, sql, mongo and windows servers
I know little about many things, can create things that are asked of me but the methods I use are rather bad imo.. ex: I finish coding a section of a site, but when I need to add a new feature I find myself rewriting most of the stuff to add the new feature and in the end still feeling like the code could be optimized further, even though I have no idea how.
TL;DR I write bad code, but things work as long as I am monitoring them. I know little about alot of stuff but mastered none of them.
What should I do? Go to school for programming?8
I just had the weirdest dream ever!!
I dreamed that PHP is like cancer: It eats you slowly from within and eventually you die.
And the weird thing is that I use PHP for a project..
Maybe it's a sign?😱2
Low key if someone wants to help me with a flask registration form that would be great because it’s kicking my ass.
If you didn’t see my last rant I switched from php to python because I know python and php didn’t like working or doing anything.14
I got to work on this project written in PHP that is literally unsalvageable so I will need to redo it from scratch, it's an e-commerce/social network mix that allows you to resell your clothes and I will have to work with PHP-only server-side so I was looking for a JS framework that has all these cool features like Angular but does not require node.js and I stumbled upon React and Vue and I can't decide between them. I was wondering if anyone knows both of these frameworks and could help me decide which one to use. (I have almost no knowledge about these frameworks)
PS: The server-side will be PHP with MySQL because that's the only option that the client's hosting offers.7
I recently posted a rant containing the tag "$" (php, you know).
But if I search rants with the search pattern "$", the search returns no results.
I guess this has something todo with $ as a special character ;)
Is it a bug or is it a feature? *g*7
Yes, I know I'm shameless, but here we go:
Are there any norwegian devs out there that are looking for a new colleague (webdev)? :D
I'm going to be out of work in a few months time, and have started applying for jobs in the Oslo area, but most jobs I see listed require 3+ years of experience. I've worked with web for about 9 months and I'm keen to get more experience. Interested in a full time job or being a trainee.
If yoy know anything, please let me know :)5
Surely I can't be the only one curious enough to start this discussion; so what's everyone's backgrounds?
I'm sure we're all under the assumption that we're all developers of some sort and like to rant about what we do-- hence the app name-- but what does everyone do? Such as what you make, what you've made, your skill set and a little info about yourself
Myself, I'm a 21 year old male from the North West of England. My name isn't actually Markshall, it's Mark, but I'm a huge fan of Eminem so it's a play on my name on his (Marshall).
I'm not yet employed by a web development company, I work in retail whilst I freelance my web development skills
I have an online portfolio at http://mark-eriksson.com (needs a little updating-- not all my projects are on there and you're unable to view any information about them)
I write code in Brackets (http://brackets.io) on my 21.5" iMac. I use Google Chrome and have iPhone 6s Plus 64GB. PS4 player. Vodka and Jack Daniels enthusiast.
So, what about you?
Side note: devRant needs an edit feature :-(13
Is it just me, or do other people feel like mysqli prepared statements like to never work the same way twice?
I just finished a 3 hour debugging session where the prepared statement just didn't work. Then, just moments ago, I commented out an "echo" that has nothing to do with the fucking statement! And guess what? It works.
one moment please, I need to let my anger out.
GAAAAAAAA YOU FUCKING STUPID COMPUTER! YOU SON OF A FUCKING BITCH!
and to the people who made mysqli...
I HATE YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE SO MUCH RIGHT NOW!
Ok, I'm back.
I don't know how, but I think php can smell anger and loves to make life miserable.
Please tell me I'm not the only one.
Today I learned you can basically just copy and paste python code into a PHP script, add some brackets and change some functions and it will just work.
I guess this saves me having to rewrite this very dodgy pseudo-random number generator I have to make!1
PHP guys, your equivalent to the dot operator looks weird to me with no whitespace, anybody else spaces out their arrows like this?13
Lately I've started caring more about code standards and best practices, but as I am self taught I have never really learned them.. could anybody here be as helpful as to offer some insight as to how I could get a nice intro to the subject?
My languages of focus at the moment: PHP, Java (android)2
Again new language!!
This time scripting language...php and start learning today and finds interesting.
Suggest some best resources?
BTW i m enjoying learning php.yeahhhh✌️5
Im a java dev in my day job (in a bank) and a real estate broker(on the side) as well... Im planning to create my real estate website from scratch. should i do it on java(spring) or other language?
I know php and ruby too. I had plenty of php projects and i had one ror project 5yrs ago.
which hosting do you recommend. *cheap is better for i am just starting real estate broker.9
!Rant (sorry for that)
But does anyone know of a good 'raw' php book? (preferably an audio book) I want to learn a lot more about the core of php, how garbage collection works (for example) I have tried reading it from php.net but I only understood parts of it1
Serious question: should I learn PHP?
I use the Microsoft stack at work, but I'm thinking about branching out a little. What do y'all think?15
Hey rant. I want to learn new programming language. Now im working with php and js. Any suggestion for new language??4
Yesterday I have to do something I never thought I'd need to. A little background: I dislike PHP and MS SQL Server; however, they pay the bills.
So yesterday in order to get work done I had to install in my Linux machine a Windows 7 VirtualBox with SQL Server on it and had to compile the php mssql modules by hand and... everything worked flawlessly. It was pretty awesome.
Kudos to VirtualBox and the team behind the open source php mssql modules.4
I finally ordered myself a stress ball, and a PHP duck, but they aren't here yet and I need them today! Also my duck is gonna need to get a new Python cape here soon as well.
!rant I've been meaning to learn Python for quite some time.
I've worked with Java, PHP, C, C#, JS, Ruby, even a bit of Lua. Any good books to recommend?3
Frontend people, I need your opinion.
I will soon start building the next version of a rather large project's frontend but I am mostly a backend guy.
It is a custom made web application (PHP, Postgres) that handles all business aspects of a shipping company of about 50 people (trucks, truck free space in shipments for new packages, package tracking via gps on the truck, invoicing, reselling shipping services to other businesses, everything).
The existing frontend is using an ancient version (1.x) of the YUI framework and uses AJAX heavily to refresh the user interface. It's usable, but maintaining and extending it is getting really hard as the project grows larger and larger and more systems are integrated.
So the question is, given this use case, what JS framework do I use and what is a good resource to start learning it?5
A very long rant.. but I'm looking to share some experiences, maybe a different perspective.. huge changes at the company.
So my company is starting our microservices journey (we have a 359 retail websites at this moment)
First question was: What to build first?
The first thing we had to do was to decide what we wanted to build as our first microservice. We went looking for a microservice that can be used read only, consumers could easily implement without overhauling production software and is isolated from other processes.
We’ve ended up with building a catalog service as our first microservice. That catalog service provides consumers of the microservice information of our catalog and its most essential information about items in the catalog.
By starting with building the catalog service the team could focus on building the microservice without any time pressure. The initial functionalities of the catalog service were being created to replace existing functionality which were working fine.
Because we choose such an isolated functionality we were able to introduce the new catalog service into production step by step. Instead of replacing the search functionality of the webshops using a big-bang approach, we choose A/B split testing to measure our changes and gradually increase the load of the microservice.
Next step: Choosing a datastore
The search engine that was in production when we started this project was making user of Solr. Due to the use of Lucene it was performing very well as a search engine, but from engineering perspective it lacked some functionalities. It came short if you wanted to run it in a cluster environment, configuring it was hard and not user friendly and last but not least, development of Solr seemed to be grinded to a halt.
Elasticsearch started entering the scene as a competitor for Solr and brought interesting features. Still using Lucene, which we were happy with, it was build with clustering in mind and being provided out of the box. Managing Elasticsearch was easy since there are REST APIs for configuration and as a fallback there are YAML configurations available.
We decided to use Elasticsearch since it provides us the strengths and capabilities of Lucene with the added joy of easy configuration, clustering and a lively community driving the project.
Even bigger challenge? Which programming language will we use
What we’ve noticed during researching various languages is that almost all actions done by the catalog service will boil down to the following paradigm:
- Execute a HTTP call to fetch some JSON
- Transform JSON to a desired output
- Respond with the transformed JSON
Actions that easily can be done in a parallel and asynchronous manner and mainly consists out of transforming JSON from the source to a desired output. The programming language used for the catalog service should hold strong qualifications for those kind of actions.
Another thing to notice is that some functionalities that will be built using the catalog service will result into a high level of concurrent requests. For example the type-ahead functionality will trigger several requests to the catalog service per usage of a user.
To us, PHP and .NET at that time weren’t sufficient enough to us for building the catalog service based on the requirements we’ve set. Eventually we’ve decided to use Node.js which is better suited for the things we are looking for as described earlier. Node.js provides a non-blocking I/O model and being event driven helps us developing a high performance microservice.
The beauty of microservices and the isolation it provides, is that you can choose the best tool for that particular microservice. Not all microservices will be developed using Node.js and Elasticsearch. All kinds of combinations might arise and this is what makes the microservices architecture so flexible.
Even when Node.js or Elasticsearch turns out to be a bad choice for the catalog service it is relatively easy to switch that choice for magic ‘X’ or component ‘Z’. By focussing on creating a solid API the components that are driving that API don’t matter that much. It should do what you ask of it and when it is lacking you just replace it.
Many more headaches to come later this year ;)3
(not a rant) Knowledge seeker XD
I'd like to know where I can learn proper coding and good practices , where I can solve sample machine problem , learn different programming languages , and tips that might help me to be better.
note: I already do some research about this topics , I just want to get more answer as much as possible , Thank you :)
May the bug/s be fixed by you.
New startup - our backend stack is php, js, mysql, mongo & redis
Can you guys recommend nice-to-have internal tools that could make out lifes easier? We’ve been using confluence so far and thinking on grabbing a jira license.
Any advice is helpful 🤪11
wow!!! it's been long but i had to rant this........My course's teaching assisstant gave me a fricking B in his Interrim assessment all because i used the pow() function in php. He said it's only available in C++ so im wrong about the whole question.2
Vent-rant. Fuck Wordpress and PHP and overly limiting css frameworks in their greasy unstable fucking assholes. I find embedded and / or game-dev C++ waaaaay more fun and pleasant, and logical than this fucking pile of cuntfuckery. I think I'm gonna switch my job, hopefully there's some C/C++ companies in my area.1
I need an advise...
I am quite used to work in PHP. But I feel like it's getting older and older. Is there another comparable language? I'm thinking about Ruby or something...
What do you think? Do you have a more modern language in mind? Is it easy to use?21
So, finally decided to write my first rant.
I finished today a function that takes the generated week calendar of a WordPress plugin and gives the user a nice print layout.
Problem: The plugin doesn't use the database for it's calendar, only for the events in the calendar. I had to write really unefficent code in jQuery(ajax) and PHP and additionally create a new table. Finally completed the code for printing out a selected day, the current week and a timespan that can be defined, every exception and input is now handled correctly .
Such a great feeling to be finally done with this 4000 rows code.
I hope that I will never again have to create a workaround for such a not-developer-friendly plugin.
Why do clients always want to use such plugins?!5
Hello everybody. Are there any open source contributors around here? I have never contributed to an open source project but I would really love to get myself involved in this.
I have no ideea on how to get started though, any advice?
P.S.: My main programming language is PHP and I use Silex/Symfony for developing apps.4
Fucking hell... If I knew that PHPStorm could display the same file over 2 screens/windows, I’d have used it sooner. 😡
It is a godsend though 🙂7
I've been looking for an open source bugtracker. The Idea is to make it public and lets clients submit their tickets. I looked at redmine and truth be told: I can't do the ruby,so it dropped. Bugzilla? Well... please no. Flyspray.... well we tried but don't get along. I stuck with mantis2 because it's the only thing with eyecandy i've found even though the source is a hellish mix of 1000+ lines of wild php and html mixes. The rest either doesn't fit or looks too old. I also don't mind throwing a buck or two but i want to run it on my own server and do fancy stuff to it if i want to.4
$rant = new Rant('PHPStorm');
When you work with Drupal 8, you tend to become psychotic because this CMS is just a humongous load of crap. But sometimes, it's just PHPStorm that's fucking with you.
This morning, I lost 2 fucking hours because I was editing a temp file instead of my controller file, and spent way too fucking many time trying to find out where it came from until I discovered the tempfile with good ol' sublime text, and realizing the original file wasn't touched since the beginning.
I wish the huge ass SQL error message I saw to no one, not even my worst enemy.
This afternoon, while refactoring a bit of code, PHPStorm suddenly starts to whine that something is either missing or shouldn't be here (gotta love PHP, heh?). So I spent a time I didn't have to copy the whole fucking function to a notepad, then copying it back bit by bit to get where the error came from.
Guess what? Nothing went wrong, everything was ok from the beginning.2
Spending all day trying to install cockpit cms.
- bad permission.
*insert here all of swear-word you know"
My last rant with example of usefull PHP function in old inhouse CRM software was somewhat popular, so I decided to post more stuff. This time we look at the login function. Besides obvious problem of SQL injection (that i of course tested) we have two calls to the same 'poslednji_login()' method (translated to english - 'last login') that actually just returns current time, not the last login time... twice...6
So I've been forced to do a new project with Spryker (PHP ecommerce framework) ... some of you guys may know that normally I do SAP hybris stuff (since a few years). I tend to rant about it (not just here but everywhere :-D)
But now as I'm trying to extend Spryker's domain model I realize how good hybris actually is ...
Well actually I alwas knew that the persistence layer is awesome (that's why I tried to implement a quite similar approach with https://core-next.io). But the rest is ... shit.
But Spryker's persistence layer - based on Propel - is ... just ... WTF. Designing tables and relations in XML on such a low-level-with-basically-no-abstraction-even-not-allowing-proper-inheritance WTF.
Fuck you Spryker, fuck you Propel, fuck you PHP. I want my beloved java-hybris-fuck-the-world-persistence-layer back ...
Me doing a complete design overhaul of my website and deciding not to make the background the horrid grey colour that I'd used since I taught myself.
Also Material UI and learning that I don't need everything to have all the whistles and bells when it goes out for use.
A.K.A my current CSS stylesheet & PHP is what I am hyped for!!
(Mainly because it looks good, and my homemade transaction processor works and has a cool UI.)
Yay, realisation, because I am looking forward to releasing it soon!!!
This is yet another rant about php.
But I'll put my hands on first: I'm less than a junior and I'm looking for a backend language to learn.
So far I've been looking at php with Symfony because it's been used where I work.
Is it my impression or Symfony somehow overcomplicates everything? Like I don't know, for any stupid thing I get stucked (like yesterday, spent two hours on a circular reference problem with serialization).
Also, I don't like it's documentation. I am a book person, meaning that I need pages of text explaining how the framework (or whatever) works in a precise order.
Symfony's docs are like a graph: you often have no idea where you are or "what comes next".
Also, I feel like every page makes you just copy-paste everything without explaining very much what's happening under the hood.
I know there is a cookbook, but it's pretty outdated (like it's at version 3 or 2.7, I don't remember).
Is it just me? Do other Symfony developers experienced the same?10
nothing new, just another rant about php...
php, PHP, Php, whatever is written, wherever is piled, I hate this thing, in every stack.
stuff that works only according how php itself is compiled, globals superglobals and turbo-globals everywhere, == is not transitive, comparisons are non-deterministic, ?: is freaking left associative, utility functions that returns sometimes -1, sometimes null, sometimes are void, each with different style of usage and naming, lowercase/under_score/camelCase/PascalCase, numbers are 32bit on 32bit cpus and 64bit on 64bit cpus, a ton of silent failing stuff that doesn't warn you, references are actually aliases, nothing has a determined type except references, abuse of mega-global static vars and funcs, you can cast to int in a language where int doesn't even exists, 25236 ways to import/require/include for every different subcase, @ operator, :: parsed to T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM for no reason in stack traces, you don't know who can throw stuff, fatal errors are sometimes catchable according to nobody knows, closed-over vars are passed as functions unless you use &, functions calls that don't match args signature don't fail, classes are not object and you can refer them only by string name, builtin underlying types cannot be wrapped, subclasses can't override parents' private methods, no overload for equality or ordering, -1 is a valid index for array and doesn't fail, funcs are not data nor objects when clojures instead are objects, there's no way to distinguish between a random string and a function 'reference', php.ini, documentation with comments and flame wars on the side, becomes case sensitive/insensitive according to the filesystem when line break instead is determined according to php.ini, it's freaking sloooooow...
enough. i'm tired of this crap.
it's almost weekend! 🍻2
Opend up my first website project, commits goes back to jan 24 2013 but i think i started coding this project around late 2011 (version 2).
Made with php and i found some interesting TODO's and other stuff, over 1k of handwritten css and right above 10k lines of PHP.
Index.php everywhere (no mod rewrite)
Everything in the www root.
By pixel css.
Thank god this is my own website and not for someone else, think i would be tourtured to death if someone had to maintain this heap of shit. To think of i probobly spent around 1000 hours on all iteration.
Maybe a usefull function for the fellow developers here, in case you need default Avatars for your users. "UI-Avatars". Just 'discovered' this beautiful API today and it really is easy and helpful! :D It even has a PHP package if you would like to generate them yourself.. This is not an ad or anything, it's just a usefull API, like 'placehold.it' etc that could be useful for anyone out there!
I finally! managed, after several annoying phone calls and dozens of emails, to convince the client to switch from ZF1 to another framework after spending several hours setting up Zend_Locale, which, as already predicted, didn't work properly.
I've already written a rant about it.
Project size is approx. 200,000 lines of ZF1 code. ZF3 would be a possibility, but I don't know what the guys from Zend will do with it in the future. The community doesn't seem to be that big either.
What framework would you suggest for PHP at the moment?6
Inspired by this rant : https://devrant.com/rants/1396576/...3
Since I'm a front-end developer I've been working on PHP quite a lot lately, not only for front-end but also for back-end stuff, data conversion and image manipulation.
I've found that it's quite pleasant to work with thanks to the tons of documentation around and how straightforward it is.
I don't get how much hate it gets but I assume it's because I'm only starting to work with but damn, you could even build a car with it!1
All the guides I have Bern looking at have had Angular control the routes and load content (as a one page application) but can it be used in another way, eg having Laravel control the routes and load PHP pages using different Angular controllers depending on page loades, or would that eliminate the benefits of Angular altogether?4
Today I found this while filling my examination form, I think somebody gone crealess while handling production db........
!rant, so I'm trying to decide on what caching system I should use. It's for a PHP app, using Symfony as framework, tlgether with Doctrine for DB. The caches in Question are memcached, APCu or redis.
The goal: speed shit up.
The app currently uses Symfony 2.8 and is hosted on a single server (so no distributed system is needed). I'd currently opt for APCu, but more since it's not distributed, there won't be an overhead from that. A nice thing about memcached would be the abillity to store user seeions, even if we would decide to have multiple servers in the future.
What would you reccomend and why?3
I did my resource and I know the differences between python vs php, but i still want to ask some of you that used bpth languages to know which one do you prefer for web developing. Python(django) vs php. (Please confirm your answer with real projects knowledge)10
So... In the mood for a new lang...
Mainly Java developer but have done Scala, Python lately and a bunch in the past (C, PHP, little js, HTML5).
Thinking of .Net or node js ATM...
I'd welcome any ideas :)3
Belonging to the last 3 of the intake procedure, tomorrow a final test and then im a php dev maybe WOHOO
A PHP variable "declared" in the jQuery.
I don't know why Sublime Text (3) does that.
(Sorry for the quality, the screencut was for friends but I thought it could belong here too.)
I don't use jQuery, previous "dev" did.
I don't actually care about this.6
Created my first bash script to automate switching between PHP 5 and 7 for apache. Learning a lot after switching to Linux. Still trying to figure out vim though :/
I've worked with both but help me understand when it'd be advantageous to use Django vs Node.js for a project. Also should I really learn PHP or Ruby ?3
!Rant - web dev prompt
Currently experimenting with time management so figured I'd try setting up both Basecamp and Toggl. It's for a school project and involves a basic CMS (php CRUD etc).
Is it overkill?2
Short Story, !rant:
I'm a java dev looking into php and laravel to be able to contribute to webtrees, an online genealogy software.
Feels odd, because last time I had contact with PHP was 4.x.
But nice to see similar concepts, eg handlers instead of controllers, conventions, decent IDEs like phpStorm.
So, anyone interested in helping out?
!rant advice needed
I have an interview at a company this week who work in PHP, magento, angular js, swift and sometimes c#. Sounds quite good for a new grad with one year of experience in PHP and front end.
The problem is the salary is 20-22k. My friends are looking in London and the ones who ha e secured roles are 36k and 40k. They are roughly the same level of developers as me.
So what to do? Probably turn it down? I don't know what o should expect but I was hoping for around 30k. I need the money for personal reasons and 22k doesn't seem like a lot for a first class computer science graduate with a year and a half industry experience. I could be wrong?7
If there were special online English course (1on1 online coaching) for software developers which is focusing (tailored for) on improving your business and communication English skills, would you interested in to attend?9
This is not a rant. Rather just a question or an ask for advice, as I have seen a lot of people talk about web development around here. I am planning to create a website for my search engine. I created a Rest API for my VPS so I can do http requests and retrieve some links for certain key words. But I need some good ideas to do this from a website. As I am not sure what would be the best way to do http requests. As far as I know it's possible with Js and PHP, but I am not sure what's better, more secure or convenient? So here I am to ask you guys, especially those who have experience with this, what I should consider to do.
Oh and please forgive me my limited knowledge about Js and PHP 😅😊3
I am a third year computer science student and I'm interested to see how professionals think I stack up against grads they have worked with straight from uni.
I am reasonable at PHP and MySQL. Currently I am studying node.js and building an api that mashes up data from other APIs to build a new service. I'm also working on a C# Microsoft framework bespoke website. I know git to a reasonable level - branches, merges, rollbacks and all that jazz.
I am also studying development architectures to try and be more useful.
Point to note I'll probably graduate first class (80%+) from a mid range uni.
Sorry, I know this is not the place but I like this community.5
I'm starting to think my server doesn't like me. I start it and it's telling me on pages that I have an error on line 0, sometimes it'll shut down, and other times it works perfectly but I can't remotely access it through FTP........LIKE, GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!!!!
!rant => question?
So.. What are you guys's opinions? We're not looking at millions of users, but it will have feeds, comments, connections, messages, post scopes,.. Etc. RethinkDB looks promising with the 'watchers' to get live data instantly, but it's a whole new way of query'ing and such.. It just feels like I'm wasting my time because I'm afraid that I'll reach a point in development where I'll have a situation for example like "damn.. This is impossible with angular or php.." [I've shouldn't have agreed to this project..] :D1
!rant && advise
I have some expirience working as full stack developer, but focussed latly mainly on backend (php/java). However for one project, I need a desktop application and I was wondering, if you would recommend electron for it.
- I could reuse some of the webapp stuff and cache it offline using web workers
- Styling done via HTML/CSS
- Portable between Linux/Windows/Mac
- I haven't worked (much) with node js so far, but that shouldn't be a too big problem
What are the pros and cons from your point of view? Would you recommend electron? Why yes, why no? If no, what would you reccomend as alternative?
My knowledge so far:
Good: PHP/Java (without GUI)/CSS
Meh: Python (I can hack things together but wouldn't say I'm good with it...), C++8
Favorite function : PHP eval()
Really epic/nasty stuff can be done with eval()
Remember: eval() is evil!1
I saw many devs here complaining about WordPress, which I used to do. But recently WordPress saved me in work.
Client needed a fully functional e-commerce site with some custom logic in 3 days, which is required only for 2days for a contest. So we developed the site in WordPress in 2days, 1day testing and data upload.
So I'm not sure if there is any solution other than WordPress or platform like that to help in these kind of situations.3
Not a rant but in need of some help. I'm not a WordPress expert here, more of a .Net kind of guy.
Long story short is anyone willing to help solve a php problem? Deals with form submission and multi images in a form...1
- no rant -
I don't want to shamelessly self promote or anything but I'm looking for some people to test out my php mvc framework thingy so if you want to and give me feedback it would be very much appreciated
So I just read that PHP v7.3 and v7.4 is actually focusing on more user friendly code.
It look long enough, Christ. Hopefully I'll be able to get hang of the syntax at some point now.5
I've heard django is really good, but I've never used it despite knowing python.
Dart is supposed to be really good, but I have no idea how to use it. Plus, can you run this on the server?
I would like to use dart as its syntax and semantics seem to be very nice. Is crystal a viable option?5
Python is basically Perl with slightly different syntax plus has py2/py3 issues. And suffers from pip like js does from npm.
Java/C# started as application languages, while PHP started in web servers (again from Perl but at least it now has full object support). So comparing apples and oranges is one thing.
Another one is that people don't seem to know much about PHP / js (and tbh not even about the languages they are promoting) when they try to hate. That just comes off as lazy and borderline idiotic. Don't be that guy.
If you have had a bad experience, maybe you need to open the documentation instead of copying code from stack overflow.
Again, lazy and unprofessional.
Devs are supposed to be able to find the most efficient solution, that takes as little code as possible, not as little time from them when they arent familiar with the subject.
Damn Im angry right now, this rant really worked me up! :D6
Okay so i did an internship in Laravel for 6 months. I started there and i had zero experience with it. Later, i started to learn more about it and i realized their Laravel version was at 5.8 and their bootstrap was at 3.4. It annoyed me so much but i wasn't allowed to update it to a better version.
What happened is, i installed Linux on my laptop and had to install some things. I accidentally did composer update and updated the whole thing. I updated it to Laravel 7.4 and i thought, well, that's good right, it will not effect the whole project right? No it wasn't right. I got Teams messages from my colleagues. They normally don't really respond to me, ignoring me but this time, they responded quickly. It was wrong what i've done because the code on the server wasn't working anymore and it was pretty bad they said. So i had to get the last version in Gitlab and i should not do composer update again.
Also, i was annoyed because i couldn't use so many font awesome icons. They all didn't work! I had to make this dropdown menu with an arrow down but even that didn't work, so i used a transparent image to do it because that was my only option to have a good arrow. I wanted to update that as well but nope, not allowed.
Oh yes, i'm not done yet.
They have put so much CSS on the project, that i couldn't even use bootstrap columns. I struggled with that and seriously, no help. The pages were styled really weird and it was dramatic.
When i asked for help, for some PHP code for example, no one responded for days and i was angry about that. Later at the end of my internship, they told me I wasn't the one who was responding and that i should have asked for help and i had to start the conversation. They really just said that? Yes, they did and i'm not happy about that. It costed me some points on my end essay, because they haven't been doing their best.
I wanted to learn more about PHP, but ended up doing all the frontend. I like it, but it's not what i originally wanted to do. So basically, i learned stuff in frontend but almost nothing in backend. It saddens me and hope to get a better internship next schoolyear.
I really had to rant about this, oops.1
I prefer to write desktop applications or mobile applications (android). Only time I touched web-applications so far was for school.
Tbh, I hate it the way have to do it in school. vanilla js, no css framework, JSP backend (sometimes php 5.4) and that rounded up with eclipse indigo.
Let's not even talk about the fact that we never really talked about js or css in school, so that was even harder for me too begin with (still suck at both of them imo)
I can't express my gratitude for js and css frameworks. They make web development much more fun for me.
💖 laravel, vuejs, materializecss💖
Feel free to suggest me other things, I only completed 2 project with these1
Ok I know this is stupid question and not rant, but I just finished school and need to go to the high school and want do build some projects. So I'm pretty good with HTML, CSS, PHP, MySQLI, and in high school I want to learn python. I already know some stuff with python I built programs for 'hacking' but I don't know what programs do I need to learn to build if I want to work somewhere... Sorry if my English is bad.. :)9
!rant: Linux Permission Question
I have a PHP Script which creates a directory (777, recursive). Afterwards a Python Script is supposed to do stuff Inside this folder, but the executing user is not allowed to create new stuff although I added this user to www-data group and chmod -R g+s on the whole directory.
My current workaround is to call chmod -R g+w Everytime I create a new folder in PHP.
Does anybody know how to configure this stuff? Thank you :)4
8 hours of coding later and Im back where I began, and Im not even a dev, Im a sysadmin with a little PHP background tasked to write a Sku generating bundle for a PIM running on symphony.
<Insert I have no idea what Im doing dog meme here>1
I'm probably about to be building a website for a church group I'm involved with. What CMS would be the easiest to get going with? I haven't worked with any of them, but I do a lot of PHP development at work so I'd like one that uses PHP. Planning to host the site on a DigitalOcean droplet if that matters.3
I want to put some user data from server side into a browsers local storage. Right now I'm just echoing js from php. Which is a really bad idea i think. Any suggestions.
Need some help,
I am setting up postfix and I need it to accept all emails, from any domain (without a domain list), and forward it to a local address on the machine (It pipes into PHP, toscript@).
I have a catch-all working where it is forwarding the emails to the toscript@ mailbox dispite of the to address. But if I send an email to it that is not in the domain list it gets rejected as it's not in the domain list, Is their a known way to force Postfix to accept all domain emails without having a list of the domains in the server.
I have searched but no luck of a working solution, I have looked at the following with no working solution
Server Fault: 133190
Server Fault: 422468
Server Fault: 179419
Server Fault: 105641
Server Fault: 161321
Server Fault: 318426
Server Fault: 514643
Server Fault: 410053
Stack Overflow: 4772229
Super User: 353488
Looking at the docs I do not see anything for it but making it an open relay but I can't figure what settings to update to make it the open relay to capture all of the mail.
I know I am missing something but I can't figure out what it is!
I'd like to use Postfix as it seems very stable and it's not a hack job as some of the projects that I have seen. It also can communicate with all of the proper channels for SMTP and the Protocol as well as some very easy configs.2
Finally.. I have decided to change my laptop. Please suggest me something good. Mainly worked with PHP and Java (Netbeans). Planning to start android.
Budget 1000-1200 USD4
I have to choose between a couple of optional classes in my course. Although I'm more into the filmography side, I love coding.. now We have a. Umber of optional subjects, and we have to choose two. I have chosen Motion Graphics as one, now I want to know whether I should take Java as a second class.
is it something I can learn on my own like I learnt PHP, JS, Swift? Or is it something that will really require a class?
If it's something I can do on my own, I can consider taking another class related to cinema.3
Sometime I feel, god forget to write proper toggle command for me.
For others it is random, for me it is static. One sad life. Only hope is system run out of memory because it is recursion with no ending.
here is the dev-rant
After fucking with Laravel Passport for 3 days, I finally manage to find a way to do multi auth.
Yeah! dude I am the guy who is going to write a tutorial for that. So, you must -- this rant.1
i just bought a mac and i realized that itunes cost a lot of money.
so i made a music player and youtube downloader in it with php and node so i dont have to worry about music anymore.
thanks to dev rant user who post a youtube downloader with google play i forget who is it you gave me an inspiration to this XD1
Welcome to my new series "shit I have to deal with as a developer hat was forced to become an TYPO3 integrator". I don't know how often I will post or how many parts there will be. To be true, I just need this series to vent about this shit.
10 months ago I started my training as a developer. Before that point I worked as an PHP developer in a student job. I was already experienced as a dev so I was looking forward to deal with great and interesting topics in the agency where my training would take place.
After a few weeks I was introduced to TYPO3 due to a support project that needed some tickets to be done. Also a new client bought many websites for most of his brands. So for the next 10 months or so until this day I mostly (around 95% of the time) worked on TYPO3 Projects and most of the time for this one client. I quickly became the "TYPO3 dude" and got tasks to integrate Fluid Templates, fix errors in templates, edit templates, sometimes even work on some smaller businesses logic.
We currently have 3 sites live, one waiting for a final customer approval and one WIP. The whole client project is setup on a single(!) TYPO3 instance with reusability of templates and other things in mind. Spoiler warning: it absolutely didn't work!
So be prepared for the next rant in this series where I vent about this piece of shit.
[ not rant ]
Hello everyone, so I just finished school and I need to start high school. But between we have summer. So im interested if you know some sources where I can get job [15 years old] if I can get job bc I think I'm a decent programmer [HTML, CSS, JS, PHP, MYSQLI]. Thank you
//not a rant, just a question
Yeah I know SO is the place to ask such stuff, but I still wanna ask it here.
I have started with OpenCV for image processing. The sad thing is it is available for python only. Is there a PHP alternative? The best I have found is ImageMagick which doesn't come close to OpenCV.
found this android app dcoder where you can write code and it compiles/interept it on their server
and you can do some in/out challenges
feels like passing tests, the whole thing feels like work, but easier
and you can pick any language of the list to do the task, fuck cheap clients and their php 4 shared fucks
Got a Job lately and therefore three Interviews.
In two of them was a question about SQL Injektion and no matter what teck stack you apply for that's the time to mention PHP :P1