!rant

After over 20 years as a Software Engineer, Architect, and Manager, I want to pass along some unsolicited advice to junior developers either because I grew through it, or I've had to deal with developers who behaved poorly:

1) Your ego will hurt you FAR more than your junior coding skills. Nobody expects you to be the best early in your career, so don't act like you are.

2) Working independently is a must. It's okay to ask questions, but ask sparingly. Remember, mid and senior level guys need to focus just as much as you do, so before interrupting them, exhaust your resources (Google, Stack Overflow, books, etc..)

3) Working code != good code. You are an author. Write your code so that it can be read. Accept criticism that may seem trivial such as renaming a variable or method. If someone is suggesting it, it's because they didn't know what it did without further investigation.

4) Ask for peer reviews and LISTEN to the critique. Even after 20+ years, I send my code to more junior developers and often get good corrections sent back. (remember the ego thing from tip #1?) Even if they have no critiques for me, sometimes they will see a technique I used and learn from that. Peer reviews are win-win-win.

5) When in doubt, do NOT BS your way out. Refer to someone who knows, or offer to get back to them. Often times, persons other than engineers will take what you said as gospel. If that later turns out to be wrong, a bunch of people will have to get involved to clean up the expectations.

6) Slow down in order to speed up. Always start a task by thinking about the very high level use cases, then slowly work through your logic to achieve that. Rushing to complete, even for senior engineers, usually means less-than-ideal code that somebody will have to maintain.

7) Write documentation, always! Even if your company doesn't take documentation seriously, other engineers will remember how well documented your code is, and they will appreciate you for it/think of you next time that sweet job opens up.

8) Good code is important, but good impressions are better. I have code that is the most embarrassing crap ever still in production to this day. People don't think of me as "that shitty developer who wrote that ugly ass code that one time a decade ago," They think of me as "that developer who was fun to work with and busted his ass." Because of that, I've never been unemployed for more than a day. It's critical to have a good network and good references.

9) Don't shy away from the unknown. It's easy to hope somebody else picks up that task that you don't understand, but you wont learn it if they do. The daunting, unknown tasks are the most rewarding to complete (and trust me, other devs will notice.)

10) Learning is up to you. I can't tell you the number of engineers I passed on hiring because their answer to what they know about PHP7 was: "Nothing. I haven't learned it yet because my current company is still using PHP5." This is YOUR craft. It's not up to your employer to keep you relevant in the job market, it's up to YOU. You don't always need to be a pro at the latest and greatest, but at least read the changelog. Stay abreast of current technology, security threats, etc...

These are just a few quick tips from my experience. Others may chime in with theirs, and some may dispute mine. I wish you all fruitful careers!

Worst dev I've interviewed?

"Archie" ran his own consulting business for almost 20 years. Prior to his interview, Archie sent HR (to send to us) his company's website, where he had samples of code for us to review (which was not bad, this guy did know his stuff).
What I found odd was Archie was the lone wolf at his company, but everything I found about him (the about page, his bio, etc), Archie was referred to as 'Mr. Archie Brown'.
Ex. 'Mr. Archie Brown began his humble career and 'Mr. Archie Brown is active in his church and volunteers his time in many charities ...'
Odd to refer to yourself in the third person on your own site, but OK, I like putting hot sauce on my mac & cheese (no judgement here).

Then the interview..standard stuff, then..
Me: "Given your experience, this is an entry level developer position. Do you feel the work would be challenging enough for you?"
Archie: "Yes, Mr. Archie Brown would have no problem starting at bottom. You see ..."

Almost any time he would reference himself, instead of 'me' or 'I', he would say 'Mr. Archie Brown'. As the interview continued, the ego and self-importance grew and grew.
My interview partner wanted to be done by using the escape clause, "PaperTrail, I'm good, do you have any questions?"

Yes, yes I do. I was having too much fun listening to this guy ramble on about himself. I made the interview go the full hour with the majority of time 'Archie' telling us how great he is.

The icing on the cake was my partner caught his gold cuff-links and tie-pin where his initials and how he kept raising his hands and playing with his tie to show us (which I totally missed, then was like "oh yea, that was weird")

After the interview, talking with HR:
HR-Jake: "How did it go?"
John: "Terrible. One of the worst. We would have been done in 10 minutes if PaperTrail didn't keep asking questions."
Me: "Are you kidding!? I had the best time ever. I wish I could have stayed longer."
HR-Jake: "Really? This guy was so full of himself I wasn't sure to even schedule with you guys. With his experience, I thought it deserved at least a round with you two. You think we should give him a chance?"
Me: "Hell no. Never in a million years, no. I never in my whole life met anyone with such a big ego. I mean, he kept referring to himself in the third person. Who does that?"
HR-Jake: "Whew!...yea, he did that in the phone interview too. It was a red flag for us as well."

Couple of weeks later I ran into HR-Jake in the break room.
HR-Jake: "Remember Mr. Archie Brown?"
Me: "To my dying day, I will never forget Mr. Archie Brown."
HR-Jake: "I called him later that day to tell him the good news and he accused me of being a racist. If we didn't give him the job, he was getting a lawyer and sue us for discrimination."
Me: "What the frack!"
HR-Jake: "Yep, and guess what? Got a letter from his lawyer today. I don't think a case will come in front of a judge, but if you have any notes from the interview, I'll need them."
Me: "What are we going to do?"
HR-Jake: "Play the waiting game between lawyers. We're pretty sure he'll run out of money before we do."

After about 6 months, and a theft conviction (that story made the local paper), Mr. Archie Brooks dropped his case (or his lawyers did).

Me: *sends email 45 minutes before a meeting*.

Boss: *20 mins into meeting*, any updates about the issues found yesterday?

Me: Yep I sent an email with an update on everything.

Boss: ok great, *shares screen*, *opens email*.

Ok want to walk us through it?

Me: ...... walk through my email?

Boss: Yeah we have everyone here in the meeting.

Me: ...... yeah I included all of them on the email.

Boss: Right, but it would be good to go through it for everyone’s benefit.

Me: *Reads email word for word, from the screen share*

I will now refer to him from this day forth as “The Time Vampire”.

<rant>
*Rules For Work*

1. Never give me work in the morning. Always wait until 4:00 and then bring it to me. The challenge of a deadline is refreshing.

2. If it's really a rush job, run in and interrupt me every 10 minutes to inquire how it's going. That helps. Even better, hover behind me, and advise me at every keystroke.

3. Always leave without telling anyone where you're going. It gives me a chance to be creative when someone asks where you are.

4. If my arms are full of papers, boxes, books, or supplies, don't open the door for me. I need to learn how to function as a paraplegic and opening doors with no arms is good training in case I should ever be injured and lose all use of my limbs.

5. If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is priority. I am psychic.

6. Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.

7. If a job I do pleases you, keep it a secret. If that gets out, it could mean a promotion.

8. If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.

9. If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is almost done. No use confusing me with useful information.

10. Never introduce me to the people you're with. I have no right to know anything. In the corporate food chain, I am plankton. When you refer to them later, my shrewd deductions will identify them.

11. Be nice to me only when the job I'm doing for you could really change your life and send you straight to manager's hell.

12. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so many taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.

13. Wait until my yearly review and THEN tell me what my goals SHOULD have been. Give me a mediocre performance rating with a cost of living increase. I'm not here for the money anyway.

</rant>

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

All the new computer science students at my university refer to include statements in C++ as "hashtag include"

The last two frontend devs I interviewed.

First:

He had 15 some years of experience, but couldn't answer our most basic of technical questions, we stopped asking after the first couple.

Based on a technical test I got the impression that he couldn't distinguish between backend and frontend.

So, I posed a simple question "Have you interfaced with REST API'S using Javascript before?"

Which lead him to talk about arrays. I shit you not he droned on about arrays for five minutes.

"I have experience using big array, small arrays, breaking big arrays into littler arrays and putting arrays inside other arrays."

Never been in an interview situation where I've had to hold back laughter before. We refer to him as the array expert.

His technical knowledge was lacking, and he was nervous, so he just waffled. I managed to ease his nerves and the interview wasn't terrible after that, but he wasn't what we were looking for.

Second:

This was a phone interview.

It started off OK he was clearly walking somewhere and was half preoccupied. Turns out he was on his way back from the shop after buying rolling papers (we'd heard him in the shop asking for Rizla), and he was preoccupied with rolling a joint.

We started asking some basic technical questions at which point he faked that he'd seen a fight in the street.

We then called him back five minutes later you could hear him smoking "ah, that's better". After that the interview was OK, not what we were looking for, but not bad.

Top tip: If you require a joint to get through a phone interview, roll and smoke it before hand.

So before I resign from my job tomorrow I thought I'd talk a little about a couple of things at work that I won't ever tell my boss in person but are generally some of the reasons I want to leave.

---------- warning long rant ----------

1. The CEO of the company finds out I only have my learner's and take the bus, goes on to belittle me about taking the bus.

(It may have been meant as a joke but I was offended, and we don't have any actual HR to complain to)

First off my real reason for not getting my restricted is mostly related to the fact public transportation does the job it needs to, I don't really complain unless the planning is fucked up (Adele concert rant lol) but typically I don't need a car. The other reason is because with a car I'd have to wait in traffic 1-2 hour each way. Also cars cost money which I don't have.

2. CEO buys himself and general manager brand new Range Rovers, you know those giant monstrosities box jeep looking things.

I hate this because I earn $31k, those things probably cost around $50 each (so typically 3 years worth of my wages).

When I had a talk about my contract at the 6 month mark, the general manager (my boss) said he wouldn't budge on my salary (yet they buy these jeeps)

3. I live way too far from work and because of it being Auckland and the current inflation for house prices, the rent prices have also increase, I wouldn't be able to get a house closer to home nor rent with minimum wage :(

4. Though it's not too necessary they mask that the app was made by me, whenever I see an email about the app to potential clients they refer to be as this app guy, and during their presentations they don't really include as part of the reason this app has been developed ( aside from my boss being the client, I came up with some interesting ideas to turn their paper form of the process they use into a digital one, I also did research for the specific topics, something I could have just asked for instead).

5. Old fashioned way of looking at so called "IT", they added fixing computers to my contract which I dread, especially since I'll be close to a deadline and then I get a call to fix someone's computer...

6. They don't seem to want to expand their "development team" to more than one person.

When I give my resignation I have to stay here for a month and I bet people will start to act differently around me, my likely my boss and the CEO. I think the other people that work will understand, given my situation.

I'm planning to for the last month to only do planning for the app they want me to work on, UML diagrams, use cases, Sprint planning (albiet, only developer here lol). Research on the third party libraries we need for the app and generally give the next guy the easiest path to getting the app done.

I want to do this because the Android and iOS app we're done via cowboy programming in a sense. (I don't have too much in terms of documentation and planning aside from a Microsoft planning website setup with to-do of which features are done for the iOS and paper Todo for the Android app.

Alright long rant over, I've got it all written down, glad I'll be leaving this place.

What Developers and Drug Dealers have in common: They both refer to their clients as users.

There's one kind of ticket I fucking love. Wait, YOU LOVE TICKETS?! No, except for one.

Tickets where people ask us to restore backups.

Why do I love them?

Because the only fucking thing I need to do is reply with a link to a helpdesk item on our website because backups aren't something within our support range because it's easy for customers to do.

So whenever a ticket about restoring a backup comes in, it's as easy as opening the ticket, pasting the link with "I'd like to refer you to the following resource: " and pressing fucking "reply"

😄

S: Do you want to hear a UDP joke?
C: Yes I would like to hear a UDP joke.
S: ...
S: ...
C: ...?...?...?
S: Well I don't care if you get it!

User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke".
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke"
Peer1: "Why d"
Peer2: "cken "
Peer3: "road?"
Peer4: "id th"
Peer3: "cross"
Peer1: "e chi"
Peer5: " the"

Peer2: "the o"
Peer4: "To ge"
Peer1: "side."
Peer5: "ther"
Peer2: "t to"

!rant but a story

This happened today. Sorry for long post. A manager from another team in development team, I'll call him junkfellow, called me very very late last night to help them solve an issue in our application's test environment that blocking them from doing testing. They apparently doing integration testing with our application. Now said test environment is not even prepared by our team. We are development team and this test environment prepared by our application's support team. So I politely told junkfellow to get in touch with our support team counterpart as I am from development team. And he began shout at me

junkfellow: "WHY DO YOU THINK I'M FUCKING CALL YOU? IT'S BECAUSE I CAN'T FUCKING REACH ANYONE FROM SUPPORT!"
me: "With due respects sir I have no instructions to assist you and your team in your testing"
junkfellow: "THEN WHAT GOOD ARE YOU? IF YOU DON"T GET ONLINE NOW I WILL FUCKING ESCALATE YOU TO CW!!!"

We all know who CW is and he can make some people life very hard and I didn't want to call my boss so late so I quickly went online and spent the next 4hrs supporting their testing. Next morning I told my boss what happened and he scolded me for not calling him last night. He dropped an email to junkfellow's boss about junkfellow being "unacceptable attitude, disrespectful and threatening to escalate my team mates". My boss always refer to us as team mates, not his staff or his team member.

Then in few minutes, someone walking like a school bully with his chest out came to my boss place and announced himself (he is junkfellow). I say announce because he talking like he wanted everyone to know who is he. My boss stood up promptly, greeted good morning, introduce himself, shook junkfellow hand and sat down. Still young, maybe in late 20's or even younger than me. junkfellow talking to my boss loud enough for most of us to hear. Everyone's neck suddenly long like meerkat and listening:

junkfellow looking down to my boss who is sitting down: "How dare you send email like that to my boss? We are both managers you should act like one, you have a problem with me then you talk to me. You don't bypass me and go directly to my boss. You didn't even give me face!"
my boss sitting down: "So you didn't even ask your boss before picking a fight."

*junkfellow suddenly look confused*

my boss still sitting down talking calm with poker face: "I did give you face. You think by going to your boss I bypassed you and went one level up? No I went one level down!"

junkfellow still look confused and then slowly realized what my boss meant. Now he is staring at floor and can't look my boss in eye after he realized he is screwed!

my boss now standing up: "You treat my team mates like that againi or ask them to do something without my knowledge and I will talk to your boss' boss about it"
boss to me: "Hey tollywood! junkfellow here sincerely regrets what he did last night and wants to apologize to you in person" and boss' poker face turned to his familiar smirk

junkfellow immediately came to me, said "it's ok you no need to stand up", he sat down in a squat and apologized repeatedly. He really looked like he was about to cry and for a moment I pity him. But then I remember what he did and I just enjoyed the moment! Was pure gold :D :D :D

One comment from @Fast-Nop made me remember something I had promised myself not to. Specifically the USB thing.
So there I was, Lieutenant Jr at a warship (not the one my previous rants refer to), my main duties as navigation officer, and secondary (and unofficial) tech support and all-around "computer guy".
Those of you who don't know what horrors this demonic brand pertains to, I envy you. But I digress. In the ship, we had Ethernet cabling and switches, but no DHCP, no server, not a thing. My proposition was shot down by the CO within 2 minutes. Yet, we had a curious "network". As my fellow... colleagues had invented, we had something akin to token ring, but instead of tokens, we had low-rank personnel running around with USB sticks, and as for "rings", well, anyone could snatch up a USB-carrier and load his data and instructions to the "token". What on earth could go wrong with that system?
What indeed.
We got 1 USB infected with a malware from a nearby ship - I still don't know how. Said malware did the following observable actions(yes, I did some malware analysis - As I said before, I am not paid enough):
- Move the contents on any writeable media to a folder with empty (or space) name on that medium. Windows didn't show that folder, so it became "invisible" - linux/mac showed it just fine
- It created a shortcut on the root folder of said medium, right to the malware. Executing the shortcut executed the malware and opened a new window with the "hidden" folder.
Childishly simple, right? If only you knew. If only you knew the horrors, the loss of faith in humanity (which is really bad when you have access to munitions, explosives and heavy weaponry).
People executed the malware ON PURPOSE. Some actually DISABLED their AV to "access their files". I ran amok for an entire WEEK to try to keep this contained. But... I underestimated the USB-token-ring-whatever protocol's speed and the strength of a user's stupidity. PCs that I cleaned got infected AGAIN within HOURS.
I had to address the CO to order total shutdown, USB and PC turnover to me. I spent the most fun weekend cleaning 20-30 PCs and 9 USBs. What fun!
What fun, morons. Now I'll have nightmares of those days again.

Job posting I saw a few weeks back:

"Looking for a web developer who knows JavaScript or how most people refer to as Java."

Jesus...

A few years ago:

In the process of transferring MySQL data to a new disk, I accidentally rm'ed the actual MySQL directory, instead of the symlink that I had previously set up for it.

My guts felt like dropping through to the floor.

In a panic, I asked my colleague: "What did those databases contain?"

C: "Raw data of load tests that were made last week."

Me: "Oh.. does that mean that they aren't needed anymore?"

C: "They already got the results, but might need to refer to the raw data later... why?"

Me: "Uh, I accidentally deleted all the MySQL files... I'm in Big Trouble, aren't I?"

C: "Hmm... with any luck, they might forget that the data even exists. I got your back on this one, just in case."

Luck was indeed on my side, as nobody ever asked about the data again.

!rant

I feel darn good today! I caught some A-holes cheating the system on Stack Overflow.

So basically a question was asked with no code examples present and not a single reference to any framework being used.
The tag only had 'javascript', which probably limits to only 157.244.457 existing frameworks.

I'm commenting something like 'Show us your code so we can have a look'.

After 2 minutes, out of the blue, an answer appears. AND WOW! This guy had a Magical 8 Ball™!
He could predict the framework AND had a very specific fix. Just a one-liner! Go figure!

So I'm like thinking.. What the fuck just happened? Did I miss something? «Going over the question two more times»

All of the sudden, up-votes start popping up all over the place. The question was marked 3 times, the answer was marked an up-voted multiple times, and THEN it hit me (I'm kind of slow).
I checked both user profiles and instead of the usual 'air of mystery', these guys were actually dumb enough to include their company name.

AssertEquals == true.

So in the comment section, I raise my concerns on the legitimacy of the question as clearly this was 'telephoned' as we say it in Dutch, meaning as much as 'rehearsed' in this context.
But as if that was not enough, this another guy comes in and COPY/PASTED(!) the answer of guy #1. Again. Up-votes. EVERYWhere.

So I start going over some of the questions and answers of The Three Musketeers or TTM, as I'll refer them as of now.

TTM had posted over 15 questions combined, mostly crap and incomplete no-code questions. And they had answered most of their own questions.
Sometimes another guy's answer was accepted with zero up-votes as a smoke screen while the real winner was one of their own.

I marked ALL of these questions for moderation, left for lunch, and came back to see how far my blast radius reached.
Turns out, pretty damn far! Although their accounts have not been deleted, TTM have lost most of their reputation points.

They will remain on my watchlist for a couple of months. I know that is quite childish of me, but I just call it my 'guilty pleasure'! ;D
And besides, what else is there to do, instead of browsing DevRant?

Is it bad that I refer to non-programmers as muggles?

Oh you're a frontend guy? Good, we need one of those.

Oh you're a backend guy too? Good, we need one of those.

Oh you're a security guy too? Good, we need one of those.

Oh you're a devops guy too? Good, we need one of those.

Oh you're a QA guy too? Good, we need one of those.

Oh you're an SEO guy too? Good, we need one of those.

"Well, sorry to say fullStackCraft, but we found your cloud architecture skills just a little too lacking for this position. We really need someone who can do frontend, backend, security audits, QA assessments, SEO, AND build scaling cloud architecture. Oh and while you're at it, can you turn fucking water into gold? We need that at our company too. You didn't get the position, but it'd be great if you could refer us to someone who is very advanced in fucking alchemy. Thanks!"

Absolutely toxic the way software people are treated I swear. The money may be the only good thing that is left.

I just heard a lady on the bus refer to an android tablet as a "fake ipad" ... Smh

Today, I was telling a team member who joined recently to refer a GitHub repo, fork it and start working.

That person asks me, "Why GitHub, why should I access it etc". I blanked out after hearing the first question, so whatever said after that wasn't registered in my mind.

I asked that person "how did you do it in your previous org ?"

The response was, "we zip the code at end of everyday and store it as draft in our mailbox"

I stormed out of the workplace, even though it was just around mid of the day...

Email from a company I applied To:

"Hi... We will be in touch by the 7th of November"

Me:... It's December already. Maybe I missed it.

Second email: "Sorry! Typo. It's meant to say 7th of November. Refer to this instead"

Me: ...

THIRD email: "So sorry. Or mailing system is failing so disregard all those emails and refer to this one. Thank you."

Me: ... WHERE THE FUCK IS THE DATE!??

Was thinking of a name for my currently biggest project and thought of a funny one, took the first letter of each word and started to use that to refer to the project, was thinking about domain names and such already etc.

Just wrote it down and I suddenly noticed:

ONE OF THE LETTERS IN THE SHORTCUT ISN'T CORRECT.

How the fuck did I miss that for fucking weeks?! It's not like it's a difficult sentence/set of words or anything.

I'm so fucking glad I didn't register domains or shit yet.

How. In. The. Living. Hell.

So, the job I refer to as Hell finally deleted my work email account yesterday.

I've been getting (and ignoring) emails on that account for years now. Probably still have production access and push rights, too. 🙄

I shall refer to the client as cunt for the purposes of this rant. All design work signed off. Near completion of project, cunt sends an email moving stuff around and changing the design. I send the cunt an email telling him that I will review his requests and send a quote through detailing cost implications and extra time added to his deadline to complete. Cunt says he wasn't aware there would be extra costs. I refer the cunt back to the quote and contract which clearly distinguishes the design phase and build phase explaining change control. Not heard back from said cunt.

I built a feature. I asked questions for days. Nobody helped. I built it anyway, and while I'm not sure it's quite right, it works.

During a code review, I asked for clarification on who the fuck it's for. Simple fucking question. Didn't get an answer. I did get the same crap response twice, though. It's great because it both doesn't answer my question and makes things worse.

Let's refer to this as "branding." Here we go!

------

Root: "Should this be changed to blue? I'm not sure who the end-user is."

TC: "should be purple, then call it something more convenient" (...what?)

Root: "Better phrasing: if we use the feature, it should match our colors and be blue. If customers use it, it should match their colors and be red. It shouldn't be both. I looked through everything again, and i'm convinced that it's only for us, so it should be blue so it matches everything."

TC: "this should be purple, and then call it something [sic] red" (...what!? also: lolcopypaste)

------

But like, that's wrong in every single way. It's internal, not external. Doing both makes it confusing. Doing both and calling it external is fucking stupid. Did she even read the PR? or any of my questions? ugh.

I swear, it's like arguing with a boulder and expecting it to listen. An ugly, oversized boulder that comically resembles Jabba the Hutt. No joke.

Whatever, it can be purple. Later, if someone complains that it's confusing, I'll just link them to the damned PR. Then again, almost everything here is confusing AF, so I doubt anyone will actually notice.

Screw this place. So glad I'm on my way out.

Girlfriend: hey, wake up.
Me: Error this interface has no audio input mode. The normal process can continue without audio.

Girlfriend: You aren't even coding.
Me: The interface was running without audio when interrupted. The behavior for audio is undocumented.

Girlfriend: I just want to know if you want to unplug your headphones.

Me: **wearily recalls most people don't refer to sleep as an interface**

You know what you sound like when you say that "I want to be a programmer but this code is offensive so remove it"? It's like saying that "I want to be a surgeon but I don't like blood, so remove the blood right now."

I personally don't really like blood a whole lot, especially when it comes out of the bodies of other people. I don't really want to become a surgeon, but let's say that I would. "Teacher, I don't like blood, I want to become a surgeon but I hate blood!!! MAKE ALL PATIENTS STOP BLEEDING NOW!!!"

To which my teacher surgeon would of course respond: "Well how about you don't become a surgeon then, because humans that are cut open do bleed, and there's nothing we can do about it."

Same thing with code. You know why code is written? To be a useful tool, for people to become more productive by running the thing (unlike the average SJW). And normal people, you know how much they care about the code? They only care for it as much as for it to be able to run properly. And the ones that do look in the source code either want to improve its functionality or check whether it's actually something decent, secure, safe to run etc etc. People don't normally look at code for the sake of getting offended by something.

But the formulation used in the code, does it even matter? Jerk, it's a term that's used in physics. Does it refer to your despised white cis males whacking off? Of course it doesn't, it's a term to describe change in acceleration. Masters and slaves in code, does it refer to slavery? Most certainly it doesn't. So why bother?

!code

I literally cannot get this computer to boot from ANYTHING other than its hard drive.

I want to boot from a usb flash drive, but the bios doesn't support that. it supports standard and 120mb floppies, ZIP drives, usb floppies, usb cd drives, etc. but not a generic USB drive. You'd think the bios developers would have heard of them back in 2012, but they also refer to Windows as "window os", so who knows.

I changed the boot order multiple times to include everything that might possibly include a usb flash drive, and then just tried all of the other options as well. No luck. Everything just booted straight to Windows.

Okay, that's not exactly unexpected, so I found a boot manager that allows booting to usb drives, and burned that to a cd. I made sure the boot order included "CDDRIVE" first (and "USB-CD" second just to be sure), and tried again. The bios refused to boot from the cd because it's in a cd/dvd drive, and cd drives are VASTLY different beasts than dvd drives, apparently. Like, it didn't even ask the drive to spin up! It just booted straight into Windows.

After a few more reboots (and quite a few middle fingers), my dvd drive magically appeared in the list of allowed boot devices. Why did it just show up now? No clue :/ I'm just happy it's there.

So, I pick that, save and exit, and wait for my shiny new boot manager to pop up. The cursor flashes a bit, moves around, and flashes some more. Then Windows starts loading.

what the crap? why?

So this time I disable booting from the hard drive altogether. In fact, I disable everything except the dvd drive, because screw this, and save/restart for the twelfth time.

Windows greets me.
Again.

What the hell?

At this point I'm tempted to unplug the friggin' drive. If Windows still greets me after that, I'm just going to check myself into an asylum and call it a life.

But seriously.
Either the boot manager in question is triple-faulting and the bios is transparently failing-over to the previous boot config (Windows), or said boot manager is just like "yolo!" and picks Windows anyway.

If a different boot manager doesn't work, I'm totally out of ideas.

Edit: disabling HD boot entirely and removing the boot manager cd also results in Windows loading. It's like the bios is completely ignoring my settings. :/

A memorial for my favorite rant of all time "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Assembler Chicken: First, it builds the road ......

C Chicken: It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken: The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you' d simply refer to him on the other side.

COBOL Chicken: 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Cray Chicken: Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.

Delphi Chicken: The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Gopher Chicken: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web chicken.

Intel Pentium Chicken: The chicken crossed 4.9999978 times.

Iomega Chicken: The chicken should have ' backed up' before crossing.

Java Chicken: If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.) See also WMI Monitor.

Linux Chicken: Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

Mac Chicken: No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it how to cross the road.

Newton Chicken: Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.

OOP Chicken: It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

OS/2 Chicken: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Microsoft's Chicken: It's already on both sides of the road. What's more its just bought the road.

Windows 95 Chicken: You see different coloured feathers while it crosses, but when you cook it still tastes like........ chicken.

Quantum Logic Chicken: The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

VB Chicken: USHighways! <TheRoad.cross> (aChicken)

XP Chicken Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

The Longhorn Chicken had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.

The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.

I have got a new director at work. My previous director had to retire already, the man was already feeling it and he had been on the institution for more than 35 years....I am 30, so this tells you how much the man has been there.

This new dude.....has the presence of a Caterprie (Pokemon) or an Oompa Loompa. In contrast, the previous director felt like a 4 star General (never been in the presence of a 5 star since those occurrences are world war rare) but I had respected that man so much and loved working with him. I really did loved my boss, he was stern and professional, but kind and friendly to his staff, fiercely protective, no one took advantage of I.T while he was there, he would literally fight for us and took our word before anything else. The man was, well, a true man. A true leader.

He took a chance in putting me as the head of my department, but he had faith in me, and coached me and trained me as much as he could. Had the requirement for his position not been a masters he himself told me that he would have loved to make me his successor, even when I would constantly tell him that I was scared shitless of the work he did and the amount of things he did for the institution, to me this is a very laaaaaaaaarge cowboy hat to fill (this is Texas, he wore a hat, the saying is normally "shoes to fill", but fuck it)

This new guys looks away when the other managers are speaking to him. He constantly interrupts us. He constantly tells us about how the other institution in which he was (rival might I add) does X or Y, its fucking annoying to the point that me and the other managers have a drinking game, for every time he references his old institution we drink one beer over the weekend. It is Saturday night and I am 36 in in total (this is my favorite part of it tho) and it is just annoying.

His train of thought makes no sense to me:

"This application, where did you buy it? we tried purchasing one on Y when I was still there but found none"

Me: "Well, since it was a new government mandate and had nowhere to go we had to develop it in house"

Him: "We had tried to purchase what you guys had but found no place that sold it, so why didn't you try purchasing it?"

Me:.....well, because it was brand new, purchase it from where? We also don't like dealing with vendors that manage these sorts of things because every new requirement takes them weeks to produce on very high budgets, historically, my department has only had maintenance fees for the software that we have and even those applications crap themselves all the time and they take weeks to answer back to us.

Him: So you decided to develop it in house instead? we would never do that! back at y we purchased everything our engineers never really developed anything!

Me: Well then, what is the purpose of having engineers if they are not going to actually develop an application?

Him: IF there is something out there that is better then why should you reinvent the wheel?

Me: For this one I did not reinvent the wheel, I am not talking about creating a programming language from scratch, but how does custom solutions that specifically feed the needs of the institution to be produced otherwise? The department has developers for a reason, because they have very specific needs in here that can only come from a team of developers that are in house satisfying those needs.

Him: Well our engineers never had to do that. Sure projects sometimes had to put on holds because the vendor was busy, but such is the nature of development

Me: No it is not, the nature of development is to create things, it is one thing for my team to go through bugs and software considerations, it is another for me to not provide a service because some random company is taking two weeks on a $300 dllr an hour contract to put a simple checkbox on a form. If a project fails the board is not going to care that some vendor is not doing their job, they are just going to blame me, if that is the case then I would much rather the blame be actually mine than some sucky third party "developer" also, your engineers where not even engineers, they were people with a degree that purchased things, that's it, please do not compare them to my guys or refer them as engineers in front of me, they are not.

Him: Well, maybe.

MAYBE?!! motherfucker I did not kill myself learning the ins and outs of architecture and software engineering on my own time after my fucking bachelors in C.S for your codeless background ass to tell me MAYBE. My word IS the fucking WORD here, not yours. Fuck me I really dislike this dude's management practices.

The shitty part? He is not a bad person, he is not a bad dude that is out to get us, just a simple minded moron with no place as a leader.

I know leaders, I know what a leader is, this is not one.

When people refer to node as s language 😫😫😫😫😫

Recruiter call me for a position in his company and after speaking for a while he asked me to refer him in my company 🤣

#LongRant

I AM SO FUCKING PISSED RIGHT NOW OF ALL YOU DICKHEADS WHO DON'T KNOW SHIT 'BOUT PROGRAMING AND STILL QUALIFY FOR THE NEXT ROUND!

Background: I am a final year student of Computer Science. This time of the year, companies come to the campus to recruit potential employees for their vacant positions. But during the COVID-19 times, the number of such companies and jobs have gone a little down. Two companies came to our university for recruitment — DXC Technology and Hanu Software. I cleared the aptitude/code test for DXC and appeared for the interview, which went fairly well. Waiting on the results. The rant is about the other company.

The Story: I am learning and working on Cloud (AWS specifically) for the past 1 year. I have a cloud Certification in Oracle and working my way to get Azure Certified. Hanu Software, which is a core cloud company (works on Azure) came to our campus for the recruitment (Cloud Engineer). Their test had these sections —
1. Personality (54 Questions; 15 minutes)

2. Verbal (20 Questions; 20 minutes)

3. Reasoning (15 Questions; 15 minutes)

4. Technical (25 Questions; 25 minutes)

5. Quantitative (15 Questions; 15 minutes)

As soon as I finished my Interview with DXC, I had my Hanu test within 30 minutes. I have a Mac so the test by default started on Safari. After completing 4 sections, I receive a mail in Junk from Hanu which stated that only Chrome or Firefox can be used to give the test. AHH! And on Safari.. the platform on which the test was being conducted didn't ask me for any camera permission (the test is monitored, can't even change windows/switch tabs). I then changed the browser to Mozilla Firefox and somehow finish the test. After finishing, I call up my classmates to find out how their test go. Know what? FUCKING TWATS USED GOOGLE LENS TO FIND OUT THE ANSWERS!

Last night, the list of qualifying students arrived and obviously I didn't make it to the list, but those dumbfucks did who don't even know what Cloud technology is or how it works. Neither they could do any average level program, nor have the communication skills. HOW?! HOW THEM AND NOT ME? Life is very unfair sometimes. I couldn't sleep at night.

PS: If you made this far, thank you for reading this rant (and sorry for it being so long). Makes it better to be able to share with someone. If you could, then please guide me (online resources/recommendations) to be better at competitive programming, or help me enhance my resume/linkedin or if you could refer me for an entry level position at your organisation, I would eternally be grateful. Thank you once again. And sorry for the long rant.

I fucking HATE it when devs refer to "cronjob" as some kind of fucking webservice and not the actual crontab.

Why do so many people refer to Firefox as "Mozilla"? But never refer to Chrome as "Google" or IE as "Microsoft" or...? That really irks me :/

So customers can place orders at our website, but some of the products are actually handled by a third party. We use a web service to communicate about these orders. Obviously, we need a way to uniquely identify each order, and decided with this other company that we would use a simple incrementing integer.

Last week, something strange happened: we could no longer cancel orders by their ID, because according to the web service, the orders were placed too long ago and were no longer eligible for cancellation. But I knew that could not be true: the orders were from last week. So I checked out database, turns out the ID's are not so unique: some refer to two or three orders. Somewhat worried, I contact the guy responsible at the other company and ask him how that could ever happen?

He: "Yeah, when we restart our server, the counter goes back to 1, you see. I didn't think that would be a problem...".

REALLY?! YOU DIDN'T THINK?

A senior engineer with about 8 experience in my team and company for almost a year now. Believe it or not, still hasn't setup local dev environment.

Every time we ask this person to set it up / refer to guide in Confluence / or just use the docker image the person says ok.

Starts sending code for pull request. The code would not even compile in most cases just from a quick scan. When questioned how was this tested, answer would be more or less 'oh my local setup not working, could you test it out for me.'

Doesn't know how to write tests. Fairly recently instead of storing string values in a list, (I swear am not kidding) decided to come up with 20 string variables.

8 years plus experience! I think this is retarded even for a fresh grad.

How you guys refer to non-devs?

I've started calling them civilians. Apparently calling them peasants is offensive.

TLDR: Small family owned finance business woes as the “you-do-everything-now” network/sysadmin intern

Friday my boss, who is currently traveling in Vegas (hmmm), sends me an email asking me to punch a hole in our firewall so he can access our locally hosted Jira server that we use for time logging/task management.

Because of our lack of proper documentation I have to refer to my half completed network map and rely on some acrobatic cable tracing to discover that we use a SonicWall physical firewall. I then realize asking around that I don’t have access to the management interface because no one knows the password.

Using some lucky guesses and documentation I discover on a file share from four years ago, I piece together the username and password to log in only to discover that the enterprise support subscription is two years expired. The pretty and useful interface that I’m expecting has been deactivated and instead of a nice overview of firewall access rules the only thing I can access is an arcane table of network rules using abbreviated notation and five year old custom made objects representing our internal network.

An hour and a half later I have a solid understanding of SonicWallOS, its firewall rules, and our particular configuration and I’m able to direct external traffic from the right port to our internal server running Jira. I even configure a HIDS on the Jira server and throw up an iptables firewall quickly since the machine is now connected to the outside world.

After seeing how many access rules our firewall has, as a precaution I decide to run a quick nmap scan to see what our network looks like to an attacker.

The output doesn’t stop scrolling for a minute. Final count we have 38 ports wide open with a GOLDMINE of information from every web, DNS, and public server flooding my terminal. Our local domain controller has ports directly connected to the Internet. Several un-updated Windows Server 2008 machines with confidential business information have IIS 7.0 running connected directly to the internet (versions with confirmed remote code execution vulnerabilities). I’ve got my work cut out for me.

It looks like someone’s idea of allowing remote access to the office at some point was “port forward everything” instead of setting up a VPN. I learn the owners close personal friend did all their IT until 4 years ago, when the professional documentation stops. He retired and they’ve only invested in low cost students (like me!) to fill the gap. Some kid who port forwarded his home router for League at some point was like “let’s do that with production servers!”

At this point my boss emails me to see what I’ve done. I spit him back a link to use our Jira server. He sends me a reply “You haven’t logged any work in Jira, what have you been doing?”

Facepalm.

Something I refer to as the "Lost Cause Syndrome".

Basically you start working on a project enthusiastically with the resolution to write the best possible code. But either one (or some or all) of management, client and colleagues succeed in transforming the project into a comedy (or tragedy, depending on your outlook) of errors.

Then finally, one day you decide that the project is a lost cause and stop caring about it. You end up in a "Let's get this over with and get out of here" type of mindset without making any efforts to improve the situation.

!dev but actual long rant - about the students in my grade.

TL;DR: 1 asshole in 10 people can ruin everything. Mobbing sucks. I dislike parties.

There's the word "Jahrgang" in Germany which means the people in the same school year as you. I'll refer to it as "my (collective) classmates" although we don't have classes anymore, rather courses and I also mean those I do not have courses with.

With that out of the way, let the rant begin.

It's often the case that people with high logical and intellectual skills (no being arrogant, other people categorize me like that) have a lack of social skills - or empathy.

I'm a kind of an outsider in a way that since 10th grade I stopped trying to attach myself to certain groups since I do not fit in there. I'm fine with that now. Nowadays I can at least socialize with other nerds.

Here's why I dislike the collective of my classmates. This year is my last school year and as always, a big group forms a spirit. They have a theme (superheroes - super boring). I didn't go to any party they threw and I don't plan to go to the graduation ceremony as well since it's an unofficial party and not a school event. I hate parties. I hate alc and drunken teenagers. I didn't attend the "Kursfahrt" - a kind of excursion that's like holidays with your course - mainly because I dislike my "Stammkurs" (main course).

Why? I had a friend in this course. She was short, geeky and I could actually talk to her. Yet some jerks (not intensely) bullied her because "she was awkward" and in the end, she switched school - also because of other reasons.
When she was gone, even those who didn't bully her and who are considered "nice" made fun of her and talked badly about her - and me hanging around with her. So since then, I avoid anything with them that's not 100% school related.

Now they're planning what we call "Abigag" - it's a joke/prank the graduates pull on the school and younger students, something funny like an entrance room full of balloons and many other things. Also, the "Abizeitung", the yearbook the graduates put out with articles about their courses, teacher ranking and quotes etc. Also, a cabaret evening from the graduates to collect money for the graduation party. Cool stuff actually. I thought about taking part.

I'd say my talents are creativity and computer stuff. So a friend chatted with me about nerdy pranks like a school-wide wallpaper change. Or releasing a fake password list of the teachers - claiming we hacked them - with puns and insiders about the teaches. He said he gotta invite me into the WhatsApp group of the Abi prank. Disclaimer: He's one of those people who are socialized but still able to talk with me. He's fine.

Well guess what he told me later:

They don't want me on the team since I distance myself from my classmates. I should either be fully one of them or not at all.

That's enough. Who distances whom? I thought they were happy to have me on board but horse shit! Stuck with ideologies from the 19th century.
They can lick my ***. I don't have anything against most of them in person but as a collective, they're just fucking stupid. I guess it wasn't even the majority saying they don't want me to help. It was probably just the small crew of leading and loud jerks. And no one would disagree with them saying "Why not? He wants to help?" (even if it was their opinion) - they don't have the brain or balls to say anything against the strong idiot leaders. They'll do great later in politics as an adult - they wouldn't criticize Hitler if they were under his "protection".

So I won't take part in making Abi pranks, - but also not the Paper and cabaret eve. They can go jerk off to being part of a huge collection of assholes - which I, in all my pride, am not part of other than on paper.

(Disclaimer: No critics to other outsiders but those who were engaged and responsible for the choice of not letting me help)

If anyone actually read this:
Who were/are you in school times?
A proud outsider like me? Party boi/girl? Engaged striver?

Just funny sorting

'Muggles' appear to be a word used quite a lot on devRant for non-programmers.

I propose we call them PWOTRTJSAJAKAGFDEM:s, or Pwortes for short.

To clarify: 'People who often times refer to JavaScript as Java aka. God fucking damned evil Muggles'.

Please refer to my various previous rants.

I cannot share my story yet since burning hasn't stopped yet. Guess I will be able to share once the burn is really out.

I dont hate PHP, but I do hate when lazy admins do stupid things.
Why can't the PHP-maintainers do a proper website? Why the fuck can't I subscribe to mailing lists?

Well, it seems like when I do a request, the webserver sends a email with MY EMAIL. And guess what, the listserver REJECTS it because it fails DMARC.
They also refer to the manpage of ezman, but they have disable ALL the functions there too.

What kind of retards is doing that shit. I completely understand why people hate on PHP now.

CIMB Bank. their app is the worst!

Refer the picture below to see why.

Today, for the first time in my life I quit my job

I feel very happy (refer to any of my older rants), yet i also feel very sad because in spite of all the quirks, it’s a great place to work with super nice people whom I feel like have become a big part of my life in such a small period of time

I very much doubt I’ll ever find a company like this again with such a relaxing atmosphere but I have to think about myself and my career ..

I’m especially incredibly sad about leaving one of my colleagues as he has become one of my best friends these past few months..

Let’s just hope I made the right decision ..

Because I’m a fucking cowboy and a charlatan, and because I hate sleep and despise feeling refreshed and happy, I’m working pretty much full time as a contractor (I’m the full stack dev. I do everything) on a (well funded) startup alongside my day job.

Tonight I had to make some quick (lol “quick”) changes to a core piece of the platform.

Now before continuing please refer back to the first line of this rant.

So instead of writing new functionality, I copied and pasted another section.

I renamed all references of “new_order” to, cleverly “new_order2”.

I know.

I deploy to production...

My phone starts blowing up. In short, everything is fucked.

I’m going over the query, checking the production database. Why is this manifesting like this? It all looks correct.

2 HOURS of broken sales, pissed off customers, pissed off service agents and I see that there was still one reference of “new_order” that should have been “new_order2”.

I am a piece of shit.

When you gotta refer docs, write code and Test mulitplayer........you need the squad!

Working on implementig mulitplayer for my game!

the most incompetent person that ever worked with me had no proactivity, always waited for an explicit order to start to do anything and had absolutely no autonomy. this guy would frequently ask me stuff that he could find with a google search.

when the IT team was let go, the company lined me up for another job, and my boss actually told me "you work well so i can refer you, but i can't do the same for <that guy>". i honestly thought that was his first job, but no. i have no clue how he managed to work in a hospital before that.

Him: "I don't need source control, it's just another program that does unknown things on my source files. What if one day it stops working?? How do I get my files??"

Me: "you could say the same thing on 90% of the tools you use every day... Like when you restore npm packages by GUI"

him: "what are those? I don't use them"

Also him: "command line is vintage"

Half the papers on multimodal learning refer to studies on human children learning. Makes me wonder why we never study animals to know how their multimodal learning works so fucking well that some newborns can function straight out of the womb/egg.

So I need some advice from some fellow devs here...

I recently accepted a job offer at a new company and I'll be leaving my place of work for the last 11 years. I'm a senior level dev who comes from a place where software is more of a secondary function and the skills of my peers are very... Atypical of most software developers.

My interview was ok, but I passed the mark barely - in that they recognize I'm rusty and have some gaps to shore up, but have decided to give me an offer anyway. I'm taking a "step down" to enter in as a level below senior to get my foot in the door of a real tech company.

I've got myself convinced I'm setting myself up to fail, despite being told by people that work there that they encourage mistakes and that they wouldn't be offering me a position if they didn't think I'd be successful.

Is it typical to feel inadequate and worried you'll be fired prematurely for underperformance? I've had little to no experience in a fast paced tech job so I have little to refer to. I was a very high performer where I'm coming from, but that's hard to equate to where I'm going. It seems like classic "impostor syndrome".

I've not even started there yet but I'm terrified my anxiety will get the better of me before I even have my first day there. Anyone out there have any advice?

I'm excited for this new opportunity but I can't seem to shake the fear of the unknown.

We just had a security training in my office and a sentence in the PowerPoint slide suggested that we should always update windows. I'll pause here. Also they were using Windows XP screenshots to refer.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In spanish we don't say "stop being afraid" o "have no fear" word by word through translation. We say "ya no seas panocha" which roughly translates to "find bravery within you" and I think that this is beautiful.

For people that are constantly afraid we don't call them fearful in standard translation, we refer to them as "panochon" which attempts to remind them that they are in fact brave.

Use the word my friends. No sean panocha.

Mood of the day

The moment you realize you didn't realize how crazy your place is and you just finished twisting the plant vines around a networking / power installation that you affectionately refer to as "Skybridge-2".

Set out to copy the iOS alarm on android because a) android's stock alarm is fugly and b) all other sleep reminder apps either offer me way too much or no functionality.

Week 1: "Oh, custom UIs need a lot of math... Ok."
Week 2 "Why on earth is my ram usage at 400 mb?!"
Week 6: "I have come to the realisation that android's ByteArrayDecoder should burn in hell.
Week 7: "Man... They sure made the management of intents and pending intents a pain."
Week 10: There. It works. Two classes, 7000 lines of code.... Hmmmm maybe apply MVP."
Week 11: I discovered embarrassment driven development, throw away all my code and start from scratch.
Week 12: Oh ButterKnife, where have you been all my life?
Week 17: I might actually finish this in my life time!
Week 28: Man, this MVP and managing Context, intents, SQLITE DB and pending intents do not mix well.
Week 46: I discover RxJava and Dagger 2
Week 47: I discover that the 'V' in MVP does not refer to an 'Activity'
Week 48: My StudyBudy says to me "Man, exams are only a month away!"
Week 49: I put all your code in my github, delete it locally and focus back on being a student.

!(dev || rant)

Dudes and dudettes, i shall ask you all one question: what is the thing/hobby (or things/hobbies) that you always wanted to get into and never gor the chance?

For me i thing first would be brewing, as i would love to refer to myself as a "Brewmaster" like in Warcraft (bonus points if i wear a panda costume) more then an "Engineer" (a trust worthy one even), but i think i might have the chance to as soon as i will have the chance (and means) to move alone as i already know a few things from my dad. The second would be something really cool i saw on reddut and made me remember the old times when i will watch timelapses in this topic on you tube: Crystal growing! Like, middle school chemistry, not meth! At least for now.. 🤔 Anyway, here is a nice pic with some dude's work, looking forward to hear abiut yours!!

PS: Bonus Points for a pic related to the thingie!

Keep note of it

!rant
User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke."
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke."
Peer 1: "Why d"
Peer 2: "cken "
Peer 3: "road?"
Peer 4: "id th"
Peer 3: "cross"
Peer 1: "e chi"
Peer 5: " the "
Peer 2: "the o"
Peer 4: "To ge"
Peer 1: "side."
Peer 5: "ther"
Peer 2: "t to "

Wait for it...

Definition of Recursion: Please refer to Definition of Recursion!

I hate it when people refer to Google Assistant as Google Allo. Idk why, it just gets on my nerves.

We got a new manager. He has us doing scrum meetings in the morning. He is slightly amused and annoyed that I refer to this time as:
"Software developer bonding time."

This is PART 1/2 of a series of rants over the course of a software engineering class years ago.

We were four team members, two had never failed a class, I’ll refer to them as MT and FT, male and female top students, respectively, and an older student with some real world experience who I’ll refer to as SR.

Rant 1: As I was familiar with the agile methodologies I became the Scrum Master and was set with the task of explaining it to the team members, SR showed up late and nobody seemed interested in learning new methodology. At this point I knew we'd have trouble as a team.

Rant 2: FT made up her project proposal without informing anybody, which required a real client/product owner. We only figured it out after her proposal was accepted as the project, so we ended up working with fake requirements.

Rant 3: This one is partly my fault. I researched first and then worked, which meant I was the last to turn up my work. In one activity MT pressures me and I agree to a deadline so everyone can send their work to the teacher in a timely manner. Since I was the last to finish, I was also asked to give the doc some formatting, which I did in a hurry so it wasn't the best.
The next day MT and FT start complaining about me, saying I took too long and that they expect me to do better next time or else. At the same time they were stressed and in a hurry because we had to explain the project outline in front of the class and they didn't study.
Turns out copying and pasting all your work in less than an hour means you don’t learn anything. FT actually asked me for help days before and I sent her a website in English, which she wasn't very good at, so she just ran it through Google Translate and called it a day.
Later FT called me rude for interrupting MT in the presentation, which I did because he started making up stuff about the project.

Rant 4: SR expressed his dislike for school through profanity in variable names and commit messages. This caused MT and FT to dislike him. I thought it was immature but if anything it should’ve been reported to the teacher and move on.

Rant 5: I was stuck trying to get the REST API working for the project Admittedly this was my fault, too, because I was pushing for the usage of things nobody was familiar with for the sake of learning. This coupled with SR’s profanity led to drama and the progress was dropped, starting over from scratch.

At this point I stepped down from the Scrum Master role as nobody seemed to listen anymore.

For people that do minimal documentation on a package and just say “refer to source code”…fuck you

Let's share information! Communicate! How do we do it? Via email!

You got question? Send an emai!
You want to share some excel? Send an email!
Not sure who to ask? Send the email to everyone!
Have a 100 message long email thread and then need some help? Send the whole fucking thread to me and just add "what do'ya think?"!
Send some attachment in email and then 2 weeks later refer to it saying "but I sent the file to you!"? Well surely I can remember your special email from the hundreds of email I get every week.

I did complain to the mangers that why the hell do we have these mega-email-threads? Why do you send all the meaningles release notes to the whole company? The anwer is simple: all information needes to be transparent and if you don't need the info, then just don't read the email!

And fuck you, you CEO wanna-be who sends seasonal greetings through his secretary and thinks anyone gives a shit.

Guys what I want to know is how do you secure your code so that they pay you after you deliver the code to them?
So recently I was in this internship that I secured with an over-the-phone interview and the guy who was contacting me was the CEO of the company (I'm going to refer to him as "the fucking cunt" from now on). He asked me to do some OCR and translations and I managed to write a few scripts that automate the entire process. The fucking cunt made me login remotely to his desktop which was connected to the server (who the fuck does that) and I had to operate on the server from his system. I helped him with the installation and taught him how to use the scripts by altering the parameters and stuff, and you know what the fucking cunt did from the next day onward? Dropped contact. Like completely. I kept bombing emails upon emails and tried calling him day after day, the fucking cunt either picked up and cut the call immediately on recognising its me or didn't pick up at all. And the reason he wasn't able to pay me was, and I quote, "I am in US right now, will pay you when I get back to India." I was like "The fuck was PayPal invented for?" Being the naive fool that I was, I believed him (it was my first time) and waited patiently till the date he mentioned and then lodged a complain in the portal itself where he had posted the job initially. They raised a concern with the employer and you know what the fucking cunt replied? "He has not been able to achieve enough accuracy on the translations". Doesn't even know good translation systems don't exist till date ( BTW I used a client for the google translate API). It has been weeks now and still the bitch has not yet resolved the issue.And the worst part of it was I got a signed contract and gave him a copy of my ID for verification purposes.
I'm thinking of making a mail bomb and nagging him every single day for the rest of his life. What do you guys think?

I am planning to build a list of Gem companies.

Would crowdsource the details.

Definition: Gem companies are NOT FAANG but companies with better ethics, culture, WLB, and good salary.

Will structure it as follows:

1. Name
2. Location(s)
3. Domain
4. Website
5. Jobs page

Make this public for anyone who wants to refer. This list can be used by any job hunter to search, apply, and land a decent job.

MTP is utter garbage and belongs to the technological hall of shame.

MTP (media transfer protocol, or, more accurately, MOST TERRIBLE PROTOCOL) sometimes spontaneously stops responding, causing Windows Explorer to show its green placebo progress bar inside the file path bar which never reaches the end, and sometimes to whiningly show "(not responding)" with that white layer of mist fading in. Sometimes lists files' dates as 1970-01-01 (which is the Unix epoch), sometimes shows former names of folders prior to being renamed, even after refreshing. I refer to them as "ghost folders". As well known, large directories load extremely slowly in MTP. A directory listing with one thousand files could take well over a minute to load. On mass storage and FTP? Three seconds at most. Sometimes, new files are not even listed until rebooting the smartphone!

Arguably, MTP "has" no bugs. It IS a bug. There is so much more wrong with it that it does not even fit into one post. Therefore it has to be expanded into the comments.

When moving files within an MTP device, MTP does not directly move the selected files, but creates a copy and then deletes the source file, causing both needless wear on the mobile device' flash memory and the loss of files' original date and time attribute. Sometimes, the simple act of renaming a file causes Windows Explorer to stop responding until unplugging the MTP device. It actually once unfreezed after more than half an hour where I did something else in the meantime, but come on, who likes to wait that long? Thankfully, this has not happened to me on Linux file managers such as Nemo yet.

When moving files out using MTP, Windows Explorer does not move and delete each selected file individually, but only deletes the whole selection after finishing the transfer. This means that if the process crashes, no space has been freed on the MTP device (usually a smartphone), and one will have to carefully sort out a mess of duplicates. Linux file managers thankfully delete the source files individually.

Also, for each file transferred from an MTP device onto a mass storage device, Windows has the strange behaviour of briefly creating a file on the target device with the size of the entire selection. It does not actually write that amount of data for each file, since it couldn't do so in this short time, but the current file is listed with that size in Windows Explorer. You can test this by refreshing the target directory shortly after starting a file transfer of multiple selected files originating from an MTP device. For example, when copying or moving out 01.MP4 to 10.MP4, while 01.MP4 is being written, it is listed with the file size of all 01.MP4 to 10.MP4 combined, on the target device, and the file actually exists with that size on the file system for a brief moment. The same happens with each file of the selection. This means that the target device needs almost twice the free space as the selection of files on the source MTP device to be able to accept the incoming files, since the last file, 10.MP4 in this example, temporarily has the total size of 01.MP4 to 10.MP4. This strange behaviour has been on Windows since at least Windows 7, presumably since Microsoft implemented MTP, and has still not been changed. Perhaps the goal is to reserve space on the target device? However, it reserves far too much space.

When transfering from MTP to a UDF file system, sometimes it fails to transfer ZIP files, and only copies the first few bytes. 208 or 74 bytes in my testing.

When transfering several thousand files, Windows Explorer also sometimes decides to quit and restart in midst of the transfer. Also, I sometimes move files out by loading a part of the directory listing in Windows Explorer and then hitting "Esc" because it would take too long to load the entire directory listing. It actually once assigned the wrong file names, which I noticed since file naming conflicts would occur where the source and target files with the same names would have different sizes and time stamps. Both files were intact, but the target file had the name of a different file. You'd think they would figure something like this out after two decades, but no. On Linux, the MTP directory listing is only shown after it is loaded in entirety. However, if the directory has too many files, it fails with an "libmtp: couldn't get object handles" error without listing anything.

Sometimes, a folder appears empty until refreshing one more time. Sometimes, copying a folder out causes a blank folder to be copied to the target. This is why on MTP, only a selection of files and never folders should be moved out, due to the risk of the folder being deleted without everything having been transferred completely.

(continued below)

Another day, another shitty set of JIRA tickets.

In this week's edition, we run into an issue you'd think is a meme, something you couldn't even make up: three tickets with IDENTICAL titles, but miraculously, they actually refer to three DIFFERENT tasks! (Also comical, they're not bugs, they're tasks, but mouth breathers don't really know the difference, and at this point I just don't have the energy to attempt to explain what could be explained to elementary school children.)

I present a rare look into our national archives!

This document features two exhibits:

Exhibit A: product owner's original ticket titles

Exhibit B: translated-into-competency-because-i'm-not-mentally-deficient ticket titles

Just more proof that 'product owners' don't own shit, the devs are the real ones who actually know what is going on.

I mean just LOOK at Exhibit A's titles. As a big smart manager, do you write those tickets, smile, and say to yourself "Ah, yep, that's very clear, I'll definitely remember what each of these mean literally 5 seconds from now!"

Is asking for literally 30 seconds more of thought too much to ask for? Apparently.

Just kill me

Happy friday ☠️

Development world is always changing and evolving... It changes before you know it...

So, having the ability to quickly adapt and learn is a must for any Developer... And, this is the one thing that I am sure that everyone knows about or heard about..

But, my advice is quite simple:

"Don't rush into participating in a race, just because everyone else is doing so.

The trick is not to move quickly.. But, to move one step at a time, at the pace in which you are at your most comfortable...

It might seem counterintuitive and a contradiction to what I have said earlier.. But, I hope that by the end of this rant, you will be able to understand my perspective..

This advice is especially useful for people still finding and searching for their place in our world..

Charles Darwin, very wisely understood the philosophy behind 'Survival of the Fittest'..

By 'fittest', he didn't refer to the ones considered to be the strongest or having the most intelligence, but the ones that had mastered the ability to adapt to changing circumstances..

Adaptability is important, but not at the cost of understanding and learning about the fundamental pillars on which this world stands..

Don't rush because when you run, your visions starts to become more narrow.. In your pursuit to reach your goal, you lose the ability to look at the macro details surrounding your goal..

Learning new technology is important, but that doesn't mean that you don't learn about various approaches or how to design a more logical or efficient solution...

Refactoring the code, developing good Testing procedures, learning to interact with your fellow developers are as crucial as learning about the changing trends...

Even, in this ever-changing world, understand that some things will always remain the same, like the adrenaline that course through your veins when you finally solve a long-standing problem...

Curiosity, Discovery and Exploration are the key pillars and hence, when we rush in, we might stop exploring and lose curiosity to discover new and exciting ways to reach our goal..

Or, we might also end up losing the drive that grips us and motivates to continue moving forward inspite of the challenges standing between us and our destination..

And, believe me, once you lose this quality, you might still succeed but the contentment and the satisfaction that you feel will be lost..

And, then, you will remain a developer only through your designation... And, that in my personal opinion, the worst punishment.

1. Learn to use Google.
2. If you don't know English, learn it. Most good resources are in English.
3. Be patient and don't give up. You'll get *very* frustrated, believe me.
4. Don't bother other people with stupid questions, refer to item 1. Only ask in forums/answer hubs if you can't find what you're looking for through Google. Yes, that means going into Google's second result page.
5. Don't get discouraged if you don't have friends your age that like programming. You'll find people with the same interest later :)
6. If you don't understand stuff right away, don't worry. Copy code from YouTube tutorials and change them a bit. No Ctrl + C Ctrl + V though, copy it by writing. Little by little it'll start making sense and soon enough you'll be able to write stuff of your own.
7. Most importantly, have fun!

(This advice comes from someone that started programming at age 10 in a county that doesn't speak English)

Chuck Norris can loop forever without causing a stack overflow. We refer to this as "time".

Is it just me, or is the term full stack developer a bit carelessly thrown about in job listings and such?

In the past, as far as I can tell, you could refer to yourself as a full stack dev if you had experience with both front end and back end technologies.
If you for example knew HTML/CSS, JS, PHP and MySQL, you'd be a full stack dev.

Now however, I feel you need to know so much more to justify calling yourself an actual full stack dev, and yet most job listings ask for a full stack dev.

What do you guys think?
Should the term full stack developer still be used, and what do you need to know to justify calling yourself a full stack dev without feeling like a liar?

My firm works for this one design firm(they shall go unnamed) Let's call them BPOS, they ask us to customize a WordPress site, saying "it's very simple". They the proceeds to send us a psd file for us to refer to.
The file has a 6 fold homepage design with all the images on it in lines and ellipses. Their designer doesn't believe in folders to organize.
I send it back saying it's too disorganized. They then ask us for a time line, and I delay answering it.
I get the revised Psd and look and behold, folders. Though misspelled completely.
I go through the design and 'what a surprise' , the design and the theme don't even remotely match up.
We had agreed on a modest budget to do this with a 50% advance. The advance hadn't been sent.
They send us 4 psd files. 4 pages and asked us to estimate the cost.
Long story short. A project that should have taken 1 week to execute, has taken 2 months. And is still going on.

Person: I need documentation for your program.
Me: Program isn't done yet.
Person: We want it anyways.
Me: Everything I document in dev will be drastically different once it's completed.
Person: Yes, we want documentation of what doesn't work so we can refer to it later for help.

Non-techie friend: Does Blu-ray Compact disc will be blue in color or contains blue films ( In India we use blue films to refer porn movies ) ?

Me: :/

@dfox @trogus I work in a dept with hundreds of developers. I’m sure a lot of people on here do too.

Why isn’t there an “refer a friend” option on here? You know like the ability to invite someone to the community from within the app.

Update on the saga of PhD application:
(Refer to previous rants for info)

My recommenders have effectively vanished from the face of earth. Emailed again a few days ago, haven't heard anything back yet.
I am almost sure I can't get in without recommendation, even with all my other glories.

... Is this the end of the dream?

I haven't been productive since the bs. (Refer to previous rant) And one deadline is approaching very fast.

My Christmas was ruined because I was anxious/annoyed/everything negative about the bs as well as being alone and stuck in a village. My new year has always been crap but this year it was extra crap.

Overall, I'm having none of the fun. My life is starting to feel like a deadend. I feel like I have to give up on my dreams to survive. And that no one is really on my side, despite whatever they say.

The ADHD rejection sensitivity is also heavily activated. Like I know that realistically I can fix this, but at this point I just want to break everything and let the ship sink.

I have lost time that I could be productive to this bs. And I wish nothing but misery for all those responsible for putting me in this situation. (I take responsibility for my mistakes, but not for how others behaved towards me)

We are 2 people working as remote android devs for this startup in another country. 6 weeks ago a new person joined onsite to work directly in startup HQ. I'l refer to him as an newguy.

Last week we started new sprint (of 2 weeks) to work on a new feature.

Newguy was responsible for gathering all the specs and planning, so this is how our sprint is going so far:

Day 1:

We have 10+ tickets in jira (tickets have only titles) no one knows what to do and we don't even have specification. I started pushing everybody onsite to get their shit together. We NEED UX/UI specs, we NEED backend to be ready, or at least start working paralelly so that once wer'e done with frontend backend would be ready. I mean cmon guys this feature is already 70% done on iOS, why cant you send us the specification?

Day 2:

We had a meeting on Zoom and talked about missing specification and project manager promised to send us the specs. Meanwhile the idea of feature became clearer so I agreed with the newguy to start researching about best way to implement our solution.

Day 3:

We received the specifications. I provided my research for the feature to the newguy. Turns out the he knew about specification 4-5 days before.

Instead of sharing information with us, he decided to create his own library to do what we want to do and blatantly rejected my research input.

Now he showed his implementaton (which is shit by the way) and presents it as the only way to proceed forward. He offers for us to work paralelly with him on this (basically he wants to write library alone, and we are supposed to somehow implement and test it, but how the fuck we can implement if backend is not ready and library is just a bunch of empty interfaces at this point?)

I talked with one of the teamleads in the startup and told him that this is not the way things were being done here before and new guy is becoming a dictator.

Teamlead talked with new guy and found no issue. Basically newguy defended his sole decision by saying that he did research on his own, there are no libraries that do what we want and he knows better.

Teamlead tells me to STFU because new guy seems competent and he will be leading this feature. Basically from what I gathered teamlead doesn't give a single fuck and wants to delegate all project management to this new guy.

Day 5:

End of the week. New guy claims that his lib is done so we can start implementing properly. I tried implementing his lib but its fucked up and backend is still not ready.

Day 6:

Backend is still not ready, no one is doing anything just waiting for it to be ready.

Day 7 (Today):

Today(Backend is still not ready, no one is doing anything just waiting for it to be ready.

So what can I say? His plan was to probably prove his self worth and try to lead this feature by giving us information at last minute. At the point were we should start implementing instead of researching.

What happened? Motherfucker doesn't know shit about backend, has been notified about backend issues multiple times but his head was so deep up his ass with that new library of his that he delayed the rest of the team.

Result? 7 working days wasted. Out of 3 developers only 1 was actually working (and his fucked up code will have to be rewritten anyways). Only 50% of feature done. Motherfucker tells me that this is how we will work in the future, "paralelly". The fuck is this mate? If you would have worked on this feature alone you would have done it already now, but instead you wait until we remote devs will login and fetch you the test input and talk with backend guys for you? The fuck is wrong with you.

You fucking piece of shit, learn to plan and organize better if you want to lead the team. Now all that you are doing is wasting time, money and getting on everyboys nerves. Im tired of fucking spoon feeding you every day you needy scheming office politics playing piece of shit. Go back to your shithole country and let us work.

When I was responsible for sprint planning I figured out what to do before start of the sprint and remote devs were able to do week's work in 1-2 days and have rest of the week off. This is how it's supposed to be when you work with a remote team. Delegate them separate features, give them proper specs ahead and everyone's happy. Don't start working on frontend if you dont even fucking know when backend will be ready. It's fucking common sense.

Now I need to spoon feed this motherfucker who can't even get information while sitting on his ass onsite in HQ. Fucking hell.

Could someone please refer me a good Linux distribution for beginner, because I am now at the point, that I want to go with Linux.

I fucking hate this low level programming shit. The fucking buffer overflow attacks and the whole understanding of the system architecture just goes over my mind. Can anyone who has found relatively useful resources be kind enough to refer them to me so my stupid mind can understand that better?

In my current company (200+ employees) we have 3 guys who deals with everything related to service desk (format computers, fix network issues, help non-tech people...)

The same team is responsible for the AWS accounts and permissions, Jenkins, self hosted Gitlab... anyway, DevOps stuff.

Thing is: only one of them have enough DevOps background to handle the requests from the engineering team (~15 people). Also, he usually do anything "by hand" clicking trough the AWS interface on each account, never using tools like Infrastructure as Code to help (that's why I started to refer to his role only as Ops, because there's no Dev being done there).

Anyway... I asked my manager why that team is responsible for both jobs, despite the engineering guys having far more experience with those tools. He answered with a shamed smile, as he probably questioned the same to his manager:

- Because they are responsible for everything related to our Infrastructure.

Does it make sense for anyone? Am I missing something here? In what universe this kind of organization is a healthy choice?

Bless whoever came up with Scrum! Now when the PO requests a change from me, I get to tell him: "please refer to the scrum master and discuss potentially adding your suggestions into the backlog items for the next sprint."

Trying to switch my job. Applied for a well known company. Gave an interview today. I don't fucking get the obsession of these developer recruiters so fixated on data structures and algorithms. I know it's a massive part of computer science but guess there is no fucking room left to innovate in there. There are legitimate researcher teams working for implementation of these barebones inside system foundations. No general software developer gives a fuck about this piece of shit discipline of study. You wanna know why they propagate this as the panacea to test people because it's fucking easy. Give a project to somebody as interview procedure, it'll take time to bring out an interesting problem and an interesting solution to that. Sorry to say but all these data structure enthusiasts are nothing better than board game enthusiasts.

Also why can't you refer existing solutions to create your solution. I've seen some good problems which actually require you to think. But again those are heavy and can't be tested so you're left with reversing a fucking linked list with O(1) auxillary space. Fuck me ig.

Moreover, what the fuck is wrong with the moral policing internet crowd. Its so sad. I've hardly seen anybody rant about this piece of shit system put in place to push the absolute dead-end nutcases up the ladder. Every other search for it returns a Quora link with some Indian guy complaining about his interviews and in the comments you have the same scholars sitting in their data structure throne imparting knowledge about how data structure holds the fabric of reality together.

I don't hate data structures and algorithms as a subject. It is cool and quite extensive but once you try to make that as a metric of all the knowledge in the world, you've lost my drift. Maybe I'm just angry with the state of things. Maybe I'm just angry with token Quora crowd.

I don't have anything to say about getting a dev job in some company. But I can give some tips on attracting clients for your freelance work.

* Have a few projects of your own hosted on Github to show off your quality code.

* Contribute to others' open source projects if possible.

* Get yourself a nice website and showcase all your work.

* Ask your current clients to write testimonials on your work and post it in your website.

* Be nice to your clients. Chances are they'll refer you to their friends and family.

That's pretty much all I've done and I get more freelance dev requests than I could take.

Why do people who cannot write specs still write specs? There are guys who just cannot produce anything human readable.
- Don't list 50 things in the same sentence separated with semicolon. Don't you have list bullets in your Word?? Or table, anyone??
- Now that you managed to add a table, don't write a novel into the cells. Especially now that you have decided to use 30pt font size and 3cm wide columns.
- If it's not an equation, don't use parenthesis. Why? Since they (and this is just my opinion (someone else might think otherwise)) are a little bit (or a lot, depending on the reader(s)) annoying (or otherwise irritating) since they (the parenthesis) tend to make the text (of any kind) very difficult (hard) to read especially (there can be other reasons) when you (or someone else in the company) have decided to write reaaaally long and complex sentences which add no information but make the reader go back and forth of the text trying (and sometimes not succeeding) to make any sense out of it.
- Always remember to use cross-reference number like [1] but don't tell what it is referring to. Special bonus will be awarded, if the link is broken!
- Save space and time by not explaining things that you can just refer to. Just add vague "read from [1], [2] and [3] for info about this." And then expect the reader to go through thousands of pages of boring jargon.

And oh yeah, please ask comments in the review session and then ignore all of them, since "well technically all the information was in the spec". You just need to be Sherloc Holmes to connect the dots.

TL;DR
Don't waste your time.

My generation, 00, Mid-Millennial, GEN-Z are going through a lot of large societal, social, sociological, political, industrial and technological changes; i.e. life changes.
We are turning 18 and starting our own lives;
Work life is crazier than ever;
And the bar seems to be really high.

You could call generation Z the generation of depression.
A lot of us are having mental (and neurological) issues or find ourselves having a lot of breakdowns;
We are passioned on what we do, although we might not exactly know what that is;
The world is in our hands as we are in hands of the world.
( Refer to my previous rants. )

This might seem really pressuring or even distressing to you. It is.
But remember that there's a lot of us. We can make this lump of dirt and water a better place just and only with our collective power, before reaching further.

We are the information surfers. We can access more information than ever before.
Please don't try to limit it too much. The scandals that users of social media and modern applications have been making can be crucial to how our information infrastructures are built.
We are addicted, and if you take that away from us, we will suffer the consequences.

* Drops the mic *

*deploys another few Telegram userbots for my other Telegram accounts*
*finds a warning in a module it depends on, dev is a friend of mine so report it I guess, low priority as it doesn't affect anything*
*both of us agree that it still works and might very well be a clusterfuck in the bot*
*proceeds with deploying the bot*
Bot> Your API ID cannot be empty, refer to READ THE FUCKING DOCS.io for more information.

Well fuck you too bot!

I made a README.md to a bitbucket repo that when a new dev comes in, he/she can refer to the documentation.

After a few hours....

"how do you run this application" 😩

When the school you attended changes their name after you’ve finished attending, how do you refer to the school you attended? Asking for a friend.

It’s me. I’m asking for myself.

Biggest coding distraction... Clients.
Having to explain to them how to use their own website, or fix something they fucked up and then tell them to refer to the manual we provided them.

It would be easier to swim down to the Mariana Trench without any aid

I teach app development over the summer, and the great thing about working with kids and having the last name Wayne is that I can very easily have them refer to me as Batman. I've never felt so cool.

One of my coworker change the code from

```
void foo() {
if (condition)
{
}
else
{
}
}
```

to

```
condition ? ifTrue : ifFalse;
```

and add it to changelog

```
- fix bugs // yes with an "s"
- feature added
- some list of the bug fixed.
```

I refer back to the commit, only one Fucking commit and on changes. Bro, what the fuck?

I am so pissed. Someone i know asked me if we were hiring marketting people so I asked the COO and he said we are and asked me to refer them. I asked my friend for her CV and referred her.

I ask the COO a week later whether he contacted her and he says that they will hire a girl they had as an intern a few months ago instead.

I give no fuck to whether my friend ended up getting hired. But i at least expect to get her an interview. When u ask ur friend to refer you to their company, u expect the fact he works there will help u get a chance for an interview or even a god damn phone call at the very least. But now the COO made me look very useless infront of her, it wasnt any different than if she had applied online rather than me referring her personally.

i honestly feel disrespected having been indirectly told my position in this company doesnt even let me help people i know to get a small interview. nevermind the outcome of the interview, but me being in this company should give me the ability to get someone an interview AT LEAST. just for the sake i referred her personally as a current employee at the company... they shouldve interviewed her and forgot about her. just make it look like u cared about the fact that a current good employee referred someone and that my referral actually did something.

I feel very useless infront of my friend now and i hate that now its obvious to her my company doesnt give a shit about my referrals...

Do you think it’s appropriate to use the phrase "dried" in commit messages to refer to removing duplicate code? (DRY = don’t repeat yourself)

I just used it and I’m not sure if it’s ok because some devs might not understand it and the the original letters from DRY went away and became "dried" so it might be even more cryptic.

On the other hand it’s so much more concise having "dried type X" compared to "refactored the code so that it doesn’t contain duplicates of type X"

Recruiter on LinkedIn:
"Hi *dev*,
I hope you don't mind me contacting on LinkedIn but I couldn't find your contact details. I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't share this awesome job with you. Can U have you're phone number? I think you are a great candidate for this job.

If it's not quite right for you, please refer your contacts!"

Where do I start...
There's a good reason why I don't have my contact details in my profile. I also have a note saying I'm not looking for any jobs at the moment. If I'm "great candidate" what would you ask me to refer my friends? I know they're doing their job, but honestly it feels like they're retarded or something.

))| THE BEST AND WORST WAY|((
))| TO DELETE A LINE IN BASH |((

(Think you can do better? Vote
now on your phones!)

WORST: Hold backspace until satisfied
BEST: Using a pen or other pointing device capable of causing semi or permanent damage to your screen, count how many characters the line in question consists of. Write this down on a piece of paper (after all, your terminal is occupied) and using long division, or any other means, divide this number by two, rounding as you please. Press the "right arrow" key as many times as necessary to reach the end of the line. This might be 0 - if so, congratulations, you may skip this step! Once complete, refer to your piece of paper, and taking your newly calculated number, press the "left arrow" key exactly that many times. If you have a short attention span or are worried you will lose count, take a tally or use some other primitive count recording method. Once the key has been pressed the correct number of times, hold down either control key on your keyboard and take a deep breath - there's no going back now (!) - press the "k" key (you should still be holding a control key!) and take a sigh of relief. You're halfway there! If you need a break, take one. When you're ready to finish the task, hold a control key again and take another deep breath. When you are ready to complete the task (don't hold your breath too long!) press the "w" key. Congratulations!! Your line has been deleted!! Some may call you a fucking idiot for not just pressing ctrl-w at the start, but don't listen to those people! They probably delete stuff by accident all the time! Now, take a lie down, and give a moment's silence for the poor poor line you just brutally dissected and murdered.

Think you can do better? Vote now on your phones!

[Rust]
I have a bunch of computational steps in a Rust program, all very expensive. They all depend on each other, forming a cycle-free and rather small graph of dependencies which is not a tree. The results of each of them for a given input are likely used tens of times by the others, so I would like to cache the subresults dynamically.

How would I go about doing this, considering that caching (rightfully) requires mutable access to the cache and multiple operations often refer to the same subresult?

I can't ask SO because they'd just tell me to use another language or recalculate everything every time, fully convinced that difficult questions can only emerge from design mistakes.

Over the summer I was recruited to be a supplement instructor for a data structures course. As a result of that I was asked (separately by the professor) to be a grader for the course. Because of pay limitations I've mostly been grading homework project assignments. In any case, it's a great job to get my foot into the department and get recognized.

Over the course of the semester I've had this one person, OSX, named after their operating system of choice, who has been giving me awkward submissions. On the first assignment they asked the professor for extra time for some reason or the other, and that's perfectly fine.

So I finally receive OSX's submission, and it's a .py file as per course of the course. So I pop up a terminal in the working directory and type "python OSX_hw1.py". Get some error spit out about the file not being the right encoding. I know that I can tell python to read it in a different encoding, so I open it up in a text editor. To my surprise it's totally not a text file, but rather a .zip file!

I've seen weirder things done before, so no big deal. I rename the file extension, and open it up to extract the files when I see that there's no python files. "Okay, what's goin on here OSX..." I think to myself.

Poking around in the files it appears to be some sort of meta-data. To what, I had no clue, but what I did find was picture files containing what appeared to be some auto-generated screenshots of incomplete code. Since I'm one to give people the benefit of doubt even when they've long exhausted other peoples', I thought that it must be some fluke, and emailed OSX along with the professor detailing my issue.

I got back a rather standard reply, one of which was so un-notable I could not remember it if my life depended on it. However, that also meant I didn't have to worry about that anymore. Which when you're juggling 50 bazillion things is quite a relief. Tragically, this relief was short lived with the introduction of assignment 2.

Assignment 2 comes around, and I get the same type of submission from OSX. At this time I also notice that all their submissions are *very* close to the due time of 11:59pm (which I don't care about as long as it's in before people start waking up the next morning). I email OSX and the professor again, and receive a similar response. I also get an email from OSX worried about points being deducted. I reply, "No issue. You know what's wrong. Go and submit the right file on $CentralGradingCenter. Just submit over your old assignment".

To my frustration OSX claimed to not know how to do this. I write up a quick response explaining the process, and email it. In response OSX then asks if I can show them if they comes to my supplemental lesson. I tell OSX that if they are the only person, sure, otherwise no because it would not be a fair use of time to the other students.

OSX ends up showing up before anyone else, so I guide them through the process. It's pretty easy, so I'm surprised that they were having issues. Another person then shows up, so I go through relevant material and ask them if they have any questions about recent material in class. That said, afterwards OSX was being somewhat awkward and pushy trying to shake my hand a lot to the point of making me uncomfortable and telling them that there's no reason to be so formal.

Despite that chat, I still did not see a resubmission of either of those two assignments, and assignment 3 began to show it's head. Obviously, this time, as one might expect after all those conversations, I get another broken submission in the same format. Finally pissed off, I document exactly how everything looks on my end, how the file fails to run, how it's actually a zip file, etc, all with screenshots. That then gets emailed to the professor and OSX.

In response, I get an email from OSX panicking asking me how to submit it right, etc, etc. However, they also removed the professor from the CC field. In response I state that I do not know how to use whatever editor they are using, and that they should refer to the documentation in order to get a proper runnable file. I also re-CC the professor, making sure OSX's email to me is included in my reply.

OSX then shows up for one of my lessons, and since no one had shown up yet, I reiterate through what I had sent in the email. OSX's response was astonished that they could ever screw up that bad, but also admits that they had yet to install python(!!!). Obviously, the next thing that comes from my mouth is asking OSX how they write their code. Their response was that they use a website that lets them run python code.

At this point I'm honestly baffled and explain that a lot of websites like those can have limitations which might make code run differently then it should (maybe it's a simple interpreter written on JavaScript, or maybe it is real python, but how are you supposed to do file I/O?) .

After that I finally get a submission for assignment 1!

This is PART 2/2 of a series of rants over the course of a software engineering course years ago.

We were four team members, two had never failed a class, I’ll refer to them as MT and FT, male and female top students, respectively, and an older student with some real world experience who I’ll refer to as SR.

Rant 6: After the previous drama MT built the groundwork for the project without allowing us to intervene for a week. When he finally disclosed his code he gave us tasks and I was stuck unable to run the new project, due to the friction with MT I asked SR for help which took a couple of days. MT accused us of not wanting to work and claimed he’d just do everything himself. I continued working on the task improving MT’s code and committed the work, which surprised MT and told me I didn’t have to do it. He ended up complimenting my code and complained less about me as a result.

Rant 7: MT kept giving SR flak for not working and took him out of the repo, which I promptly forked just in case he tried anything scummy. SR was indeed working on certain things, but he wasn’t listening to MT’s demands, there was no team coordination. I had to act as a proxy and push some of SR’s changes myself while informing him of the state of things.

Rant 8: When MT finally added SR back and some of the tasks were cleared up, FT didn’t cooperate. She seemed to have zero initiative and always relied on MT to tell her what to do, which didn’t include coordinating with SR to get the front-end templates running. I tried getting them in a group chat but it didn’t work, she just ignored him.

I learned a few things from that.
1. No matter how smart or experienced someone may seem, sometimes people are just petty or take things too personally.
2. Top students are sometimes too focused on their grades and disregard depth of knowledge and work quality.
3. A bad team at college can somehow make something acceptable if everyone works on things that add some kind of value.

So I joined a pretty big organization, and am working here for like the last 4 months. Barely wrote any code, mostly I have been documenting stuff, and testing stuff of other devs.
So I had a doubt regarding a functionality, like what I asked a senior dev was, Where exactly is this logic implemented in the codebase so that I can refer it. He was like, you are supposed to know it since you have worked on a testing ticket of it. And if I ask the manager such questions, he would be pissed off. My point of view is that yes, I might have seen that logic, and it might have been explained it to me once, but at that point of time, I did not knew about which functionality it was being used for. am I in the wrong here? Am I not paying enough attention to the code base given It's my 4th month here?

Hi everyone, I'm a now second year computer science student. I have read through posts on Dev Rant for a while now and have loved every minute of it. I really wanted to start contributing to this awesome community and thought a question might be a good start. There seems to be a ton of inconsistencies among certain terms. The biggest that really grinds my gears is how people refer to "()", "[]", and "{}". I personally refer to the first set as parenthesis, the second as brackets, and the third as braces. Throughout my time at this college and around the internet I have read some people say curly braces, curly brackets, squigly brackets, round brackets, square braces, and my personal favorite "those curvy round things". Other students do this which is understandable, but it seemed strange that even my professors use them interchangeably. So is there a naming convention anywhere that might help with this issue or somewhere I can get some clarification?

I helped release an app to the App Store on a Tuesday night. We now historically refer to it as The Twednesday.

When you refer to the Arch wiki and your files are different to what step one is, so you just wing it.

Tabs, or No Tabs? I did the same as this commentor 2 years ago. I can code so quick now because of this simple switch. Here's why:

(source, Laracasts.com)

Ben Smith
"I think the most beneficial tip was to do away with tabs. Although it took a while to get used to and on many occasions in the first few days I almost switched them back on, it has done wonders for my workflow.

I find it keeps my brain more engaged with the task at hand due to keeping the editor (and my mind) clutter free. Before when I had to refer to a class, I would have opened it in a new tab and then I might have left it open to make it easier to get to again. This would quickly result in a bar full of tabs and navigation around the editor would become slow and my brain would get bogged down keeping track of what was open and which tab it was in. With the removal of the tab bar I'm now able to keep only the key information in my mind and with the ability to quickly switch between recently opened files, I find I haven't lost any of the speed which I initially thought I might.

In fact this is something I have noticed in all areas of writing code, the more proficient I have become with an editor the better the code I have been writing. Any time spent actually writing your code is time in which your brain is disconnected from the problem you are trying to solve. The quicker you are able to implement your ideas in code, the smaller the disconnect becomes. For example, I have recently been learning how to do unit testing and to do so I have been rewriting an old project with tests included. The ability to so quickly refactor has meant that whereas before I might have taken 30 seconds shuffling code around, now I can spend maybe 5 seconds allowing my mind to focus much better on how best to refactor, not on the actual process of doing so."

jeff_way Mod
"Yeah - it takes a little while to get used to the idea of having no tabs. But, I wouldn't go back at this point. It's all about forcing yourself into a faster workflow. If you keep the tabs and the sidebar open, you won't use the keyboard."

O Friends, It Is Great To Be Writing To You Again. Let Me Share With You A Most Amazing A Tale! I Have Spent Some Time Now In CapitalizedCamelCaseLand. It Is A Glorious Land, Where All Written Word, Language, and Culture Is Governed By The Almighty CapitalizedCamelCase. The People Are Productive And Extremely WellTyped (A Phrase They Charish And Use To Mean General WellBeing).

The Honorable Citizens Of CapitalizedCamelCaseLand Have But Few Fears... And I Shrink To Speak Of Them Or Even Write Them Here, As It Is A Heinous Crime To Even Mention Or Write These Words... But I Must Report, As It Is My Duty... So, Their Fears: The Horrible And Most Repellant lowerCamelCaseJavaScriptianDevils, Or Even Worse, The Grisly And Ghastly snake_case_fiends_of_pythonia!!! O My Friends How It Fears Me To Even Form Such Foreign And Strange Characters And Symbols That Remind The Citizens Of CapitalizedCamelCaseLand Only Of Pain And Suffering!

Many Wars Have Been Fought Upon The Lands Of Both JavaScriptia and Pythonia (The Cultural And Correct Way To Refer To These Harsh Lands In Respectable Company), But To No Avail Or Final Stop To The Fighting. While CapitalizedCamelCaseLand Is Currently In A State Of General Peace And Prosperity, There Is Surely A FlareUp Of Conflict To Occur Against The JavaScriptianDevils Or The PythonianSnakeFiends!

For In DevWorldia (The Name Of This Strange Planet I Report From), There Has Rarely Been A Time Of Peace Lasting For More Than About 5 Minutes, Which The Citizens Of CapitalizedCamelCase Assure Me Is Already A Massive Length Of Time And Achievement To Be Cherished.

Alas, I Beleive In The Coming Days I Must Travel To The FarAway Lands Of JavaScriptia And Pythonia. I Can Only Hope That I Am Also Treated With Kindness And Respect In Those Lands By Attempting To Emulate Their Ways, Just As I Have Here In CaptializedCamelCaseLand. I Hope To Write To You Soon And Wish You Well.

Signed And Sincerely,

Language Traveler FullStackChris

Those working as freelancer, how many times has a potential client told you that if you do this job for cheap he would refer you in his business circle and you would for sure get atleast X projects in next quarter ?

I am interested in how you guy discover devrant.

Does someone refer devrant to you or does your feeling explode and you finally found devrant?

As for me someone posted a link on Discord.

So I just started watching Eli The Computer Guy's videos on networking and I really like them so far(only on the introduction so far though), but I was a bit confused about some of the stuff and I thought to myself that some of this might be obsolote or not so much in use these days/different. So here are some questions(now bear with me, I'm still a noob to the whole topic of networking):

-Are Eli's videos on networking obsolete(besides the speeds that he talks about), what you recommend some other tutorial, if so which one?

-Is a switch necessary for a small network?

-Do we still connect routers to modems or do we just use what we refer to as a router(a mix between a router and a modem -> gateway/gateway router)?

-Can you connect an ethernet cable to your router/gateway?

-So according to Eli if you have multiple routers they make seperate networks that cant just be acessed from each other, then how come it be that I can access my rasperry pi when I'm connected on the network of one router when the raspberry pi is connected to the network of another router and how come it be that once you have the wifi password you can connect to all of them?

aagh fuck college subjects. over my last 4 years and 7 sems in college, i must have said this many times : fuck college subjects. But Later i realize that if not anything, they are useful in government/private exams and interviews.

But Human computer Interaction? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS SUBJECT???
This has a human in it, a comp in it, and interaction in it: sounds like a cool subject to gain some robotics/ai designing info. But its syllabus, and the info available on the net , is worse than that weird alienoid hentai porn you watched one night( I know you did).

Like, here is a para from the research paper am reading, try to figure out even if its english is correct or not:
============================
Looking back over the history of HCI publications, we can see how our community has broadened intellectually from its original roots in engineering research and, later, cognitive science. The official title of
the central conference in HCI is “Conference on Human Factors in Computing Systems” even though we usually call it “CHI”. Human factors for interaction originated in the desire to evaluate whether pilots
could make error-free use of the increasingly complex control systems of their planes under normal conditions and under conditions of stress. It was, in origin, a-theoretic and entirely pragmatic. The conference and field still reflects these roots not only in its name but also in the occasional use of simple performance metrics.

However, as Grudin (2005) documents, CHI is more dominated by a second wave brought by the cognitive revolution. HCI adopted its own amalgam of cognitive science ideas centrally captured in Card, Moran & Newell (1983), oriented around the idea that human information processing is deeply analogous to computational signal processing, and that the primary computer-human interaction task is enabling communication between the machine and the person. This cognitive-revolution-influenced approach to humans and technology is what we usually think of when we refer to the HCI field, and particularly that represented at the CHI conference. As we will argue below, this central idea has deeply informed the ways our field conceives of design and evaluation.

The value of the space opened up by these two paradigms is undeniable. Yet one consequence of the dominance of these two paradigms is the difficulty of addressing the phenomena that these paradigms mark as marginal.

=============================

When replying to posts, it'd be useful if we could reply in a textbox underneath the rant or comment rather than a modal window (at least on a desktop browser.)

Sometimes I want to refer back or double check something as I'm replying to it, and the current modal dialog makes it a tad annoying to do that at present.

Got an email from a recruiter.. he went on to outline how great I’d be for the job he had in mind…

Then ended the email with: Let me know if you are interested, OR if you have a referral for this position.

WHAT?! I thought I was perfect for this position.. why are you asking me to refer someone else? Ug.

My do-over would be going to a different coding bootcamp. I wonder if I could be making more money if I went to a better school.

The one I did go to was a big scam. They were more obsessed with teaching you to pretend rather than teaching how to code. They pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes—the students, the volunteers, the donors, the community. They were very cult-like with mantras like “trust the process.”

I spent 9 months there, but I felt I was a year behind. I am not misspeaking. I would have to relearn basic concepts the right way because they taught them half assed or not at all. I didn’t realize I was behind until I went to interviews and bombed. Seriously, I learned more in a 40 hour free library coding class than I learned in 9 months at the school. Most of the interviews I was getting were for unpaid internships. The school was telling me to go for mid level roles.

I found out recently that they’re breaking the law by operating without a license. In my state code schools do need a license. There are screenshots going around of a letter from the education department. They’re defense is “they’re not a school.” They’re still open. I think ppl should be warned away, but there’s only so much I can do. And I know ppl will give this place the benefit of the doubt before taking any student accusations seriously.

The biggest red flag is they want students to pay up to 70k and bind them to payments for 8 years. I say it’s a red flag because this place is operating as a nonprofit. Shouldn’t a nonprofit not be charging 3-4x more than competitors? They’re definitely not going to give you 70k worth of services.

They really just exploit the poor and POC by signing them up for debt and knowing those ppl would not be able to pay even with a 100k job. They have a very poor understanding about how poverty works.

It had MLM/pyramid scheme vibes when they started making recruiting students a game. They give out tickets to their annual fundraiser or promote you on social media if you refer the most students to them.

I’m one of the lucky ones who was studying coding before I started at the school. Also, job searching is mostly luck, so I was lucky at that too. But I still had to take a job that paid below market. I still wonder what would happen if I went someplace else.

I don’t even put this place on my resume or LinkedIn. Even without these problems, it’s not like anyone would have heard of the place anyway.

No this place isn’t Lambda or Holberton school.

I refer back to earlier rants. But essentially, this guy lied about having a com sci degree. Didn't know how JS works, didn't know how vcs works, didn't know how to tie his own shoes. Proceeds to repeatedly clobber the work I do, which frankly, was the only real work being done in the whole group at all. Commits old and irrelevant work just to appear in the commit history. Then, he has the audacity to accuse me of not being good at dealing with people.

Finally decided to tell the instructor what had been happening. Then I proceeded to get frantic messages repeatedly from this fucker for the next week after class as he desperately attempted to salvage his grade. I'm pretty sure he failed. All in all, I'd say wait til the last minute to get revenge sometimes, then the person you're fucking with doesn't have time to react.

Hi guys i need some help my visual studio professional 2017 with xamarin is running slow in my laptop

Specs
I7 4th gen
8gb ram
Gtx 850m 4gb
1tb hdd

And can you refer an IDE like ms VS

People in this discussion will refer to my classmates doing their project we were allowed to choose like 3 months ago and back then I already told them they won't ever manage to make it work in time.

People: "yo could you help real fast"
Me: "aaah not again but okay why not"
People: "here's the code"
Me: "the fuck is this? What is it supposed to do?"
People: "ummm it should doooo eeeerrr... Like this and .... Yeah we don't know. The output should look like that but it doesn't"
Me: "the fuck did you even try to do. That'll never work. And I told you the same thing like 3 months ago when you just chose the project. Just go and use some random math lib you find"
People: "kkkk"

Their code seriously made no sense at all. Parsing substring within like 5 nested loops and like 20vars called "s1" and "theString" and what not.

* talking with coworker about how to use a certain library *

* other coworker comes in *
"Oh I have experience in that library. Perhaps I could help"

* we explain our problem *
"Hmmm yeah, you should probably refer to the docs."

Helpful 1000!

Any other people here that find Python to be actually a harder language than Java? With Java it's much easier to keep track of your code and to track what variables refer to certain object types.

It feels like Python has much more quirks and feels therefore much more inconsistent as a language. Object oriented programming is more verbose with static methods and decorators being vague for example. This makes it harder to grasp concepts like design patterns and SOLID principles in Python imo.

Some people are just inherently retards and there's nothing that can be done about it.

So this intern of mine (not really an intern because she is older than me but new to the field so whatever), is driving me nuts.

There's a file on cloud, she was given to refer during the initial training.

The current link is no longer accessible because whoever the fuck owned it has left or revoked the access.

So I ask her if she has a copy of the file because I want to refer it.

She replies saying:
"Can you share anither link, the current links shows some error"

Holy freaking lord. The keyword in my request was COPY. Why on this sweet sunny earth I'd ask you if the link worked and file was available!!!!

And she couldn't even comprehend that the error is about access. Just says SOME error.

I'll be spending next 2.5 hours reviewing her 1 week of work submissions (which has been ongoing since 3+ weeks now and should have taken 3 hours to finish).

This has got nothing to do with anyone's gender but all about my experience with them.

Well my expert developer friend asked me why 'bugs' were called 'bugs'....

Personally I told him STFU cause he had to ask such an important question when my headphones were on, nevertheless 'bugs' are getting old now, let's just refer to them as 'problematic, chronic, death causing errors often caused by a stupid typo'

When commenting it would be nice to see the comment you are commenting against. Often they are long with several points and you can't refer back to it

Hey, I want to name a library of mine something like "San'stools" So it's like "the tools from San" but it can also be "San's stools".
I looked up if stools meant what I thought it meant, little seat stuff, but apparently it's also dump...

Would it be too disgusting? Should I use another name?
How often is the word stool used to refer to... you know...?

Been thinking of dual booting my laptop with Linux. Currently running Windows 10 Home 64 bit.

Which distro would you guys refer for programming?

Suggestions please :)

What should I do to practice being a "good coder" vs a "code Googler" who slaps other people's code into the site just because "it's enough to get the damn thing working"?

I feel really overwhelmed with all that Ive learned thus far. At this point I feel width with know depth when it comes to my knowledge of websites.

I've been messing around with html/css/js for a while and played with plenty of other languages,pre-processors, frameworks, etc. I never went to school for programming and have done work for small businesses independently for some time. Most of what I know comes from codecademy treehouse and similar sites. I can refer to Google on a lot of things but I feel like there are habits that I should be implementing so I don't have to re-do things later. I love the book apart series but I still feel like it's missing the foundational knowledge that I'm looking for.

After all of the time I've spent going through courses I feel like my experiences have given me solutions to build a few things and now I'm just jamming those solutions onto whatever I can until something I like comes on to the browser.

It's really easy to sit down and bang my head against the keyboard until something comes out that looks the way I want it to. However, I know there is way more going on that could help me make better decisions. I just feel like I'm missing something. Maybe it's experience, or maybe it's just the lack of commroddery from working alone and not being able to approach problems with a team.

I hate pulling up my css file and feeling like it's rubbish, and feeling like I don't completely understand things like flex, or display, or position. I've been pushing at this for a while but I don't think I've found a resource that has really made me feel like I'm anywhere close to being a competent coder.

There are tons of watch and learn and do type classes that show you how to make stuff, but I guess what I want to know now is why we make it that way.

At some point do you just sit down and read the MSN start to finish?

I wonder sometimes if my brain has been reprogrammed because I grew up in Google world and don't actually have to solve anything for myself. I read about a guy who locked himself away for hours with books on code and he just sat there and wrote his code on paper until he was confident that he was getting it right.

Any sys admins in mexico city? I just got a job I can refer you to

If iterm was released for Linux, I would refer to 2018 as the year iterm was released for Linux.

Make good connections with the engineers in the company. Persuade them to refer you for the job, if you're lucky you get to skip the interview.

Until I started a new IT position a few months ago, I had never heard anyone refer to the backslash as "whack." Luckily I was able to pick up what my coworker was saying through the context of the conversation so I didn't look like an idiot, but it made me wonder what the origins of the "whack" term are. Google confirmed to me that this isn't just something he made up and that it is a semi-commonly used term, but I didn't see anything on its origin.

Know what really grinds my gears?

People who refer to "ajax" as though it's a separate programming language, instead of what it is, which is an old shitty method in an old shitty library. What I do enjoy is people thinking it's dish soap. That will *never* not be funny to me.

Examples:

1. *generic job description*...5 years experience. Desired skills: HTML, Foundation, PHP, Ajax, Fortran, Assembly, Tagalog, smoke signals.

2. Someone in "marketing": "Do you know Ajax?"

3. Jackass in a coffee shop who uses moustache wax: "I'm an ajax programmer. Yeah I've heard of [any recent band], like twenty years ago. They suck."

Go die, and take ajax with you.

!gamingRant
What annoys my the most in gaming, is when gamers refer to cheaters as "hackers". THEY AREN'T. They are SCRIPT KITTIES. I'm sure most of us here would consider ourselves hackers, and we can all agree that hacking takes time, motivation, and most of all, skill. Cheaters in video games are the lowest of the low. The just download and install scripts written by real hackers. This triggers me beyond words and all caps. What do you all think?

"Okay, this is way OT but here it goes. Back during the GW Bush days I noticed something strange. All five TV networks suddenly started using human(s) to refer to us. Gone were humanity, humankind, mankind (!), people, person(s), us, we and human beings I about barfed when I watched an ingenue said her best girlfriend had found a wonderful human to marry.
I see three problems. One is the way putative competitors started this newspeak in lockstep. Another is the degradation of English. The last is the loss of emotional content. Saying "Humans are responsible for climate change." is so blah it's like somebody else is responsible, like Martians, maybe like somebody else is responsible, Martians, maybe.
I apologize for the wording of this rant but I am forced to use a phone with one hand due to severe injury.

age++;

Normally, I'd leave it there like most other people. But this is devRant, not Facebook [citation needed], so let me take the opportunity to talk about a dev-related project I'm mulling over.

A number of years ago, I dropped my music hobby in exchange for focusing on my computer science/programming skills. I'm now at a point where I'm working professionally as a developer, and I've wanted to get back into music for quite some time. Specifically, I want to make music, not just perform it.

Thing is, I've had difficulty trying to find a good platform for uploading WIPs to get feedback from. I'm hesitant to post them on social media platforms for a variety of reasons (though I'm open to budge), so I've been considering alternatives.

So here's my idea: A personal blog made from the ground up that details my journey rediscovering music, including tracking the resources I've used for others to refer to, music samples, etc. I think it would be a great opportunity to not only get feedback on music I've made, but to also incorporate my programming skills with my music hobby.

I'd appreciate any feedback on the idea, as well as any advice/recommended tools for taking on a project like this.

Yesterday I took the evening to set up a backup server on my home NAS, so I could finally backup my dualboot laptop. Today I came home from work, boot up the laptop to configure the clients.... This happen, fucking black screen and doesn't even boot! Fuck fuck fuuuuuuck!!!

I think I finally, really, comprehend why secret societies have historically been created... I mean the potentially logical ones. This train of thought is logically terrifying.

I want a logic check.

I've been jokingly mentioning some of my totally true, practically useless in most scenarios, skills/specific fields of knowledge/ability under a moniker of 'extremely useful, assuming apocalyptic event' for years. Things like advanced knowledge of Coefficients of glass expansion, Fortran, various things that have caused friends to refer to me as MacGyver after the reboot came out.

In recent years, I've personally encountered several varieties of the ones defined by helplessness, self-victimisation, some version of a real disability... that theyve expounded into a personified personal nemesis-- to flashily battle yet never overcome, etc... the vast majority perplexing me as to why that's a valid form of life to them... it's not that they never consider some other way; the ball is just quickly dropped and never picked back up.

College?(not that I'm a big fan) they wish they could but so expensive... aide? The form was hard/confusing/past-due...

Lookup/learn something more indepth than a tiktok? *some self-deprecating bs*

Yet it's "I always wanted to do/be/learn X"

Shows like 'How It's Made' fascinate, but don't inspire enough for a 5min google query.

In the dev world its a clear, inverted pyramid-- one of the first posts I saw when I rejoined here was ostream's rant on Apple sucking because after they stop support/updates you "can't" load a different OS... ofc you can. But several comments down... no mention of that... i think it was @LensFlare who was the only one in ~15 respondents to point out the core logical fallacy.

Basic shit is totally forgotten... try asking some random adults what plastic is made from... or pay attention to how many people declare they have a gluten "allergy".

I get people frequently telling me that things im pointing out as differences don't matter because "it's just semantics"... semantics is literally the epitome of "significance", with roots in 'meaning' and 'truth'

Back to the main issue... We are in a world where DIY is typically something you pay more to do as a catered experience than actually learning anything, people destroy their own arguments hopes of validity unwittingly often by stating the arguement, get 'offended' or 'triggered' by factual statements, propagate misinformation and bastardise words until MW needs money enough to print a new version, likely adding the misuse as an actual definition and basic knowledge and the thought to actually learn is vetoed by the existence of google translate, the wisdom of tiktok and the pure brillance of troubleshooting every random linux issue you have from not knowing basic CLI and thinking linux makes you cool, with chmod 777 because so many other dumbasses on forums keep propagating misinformation. Ask them what 777 means, most have no clue... as they didnt consider googling that one before putting it in a terminal several times.
The number of humans that actually know the basic shit that the infrastructure of the world is built on keeps decreasing... and we aren't even keeping a running tally.

The structure of the internet has the right idea... dns- 13 active master root servers, with multiple redundancies if they start dropping... hell ICANN is like a secret society but publicly known/obfuscated... the modern internet hasnt had a global meltdown... aside from the lack of censorship and global availability changing the social definition of a valid use of braincells to essentially propagating spam as if it's factual and educational.

So many 'devs' so few understanding what a driver is, much less how to write one... irl network techs that don't know what dhcp is or that their equiptment has logs... professionals in deducated fields like Autism research/coping... no clue why it was called "autism", obesity and malnutrition simultaneously existing in the same humans... it's like we need to prepare a subterranean life-supporting vault and stock it like Noah's ark... just including the basic knowledge of things that used to be common/obvious. I've literally had 2 different, early 20s, female, certified medical assistants taking my medical history legitimately ask if not having a uterus made it harder to get pregnant...i wish i was joking.

Any ideas better than a subterranean human vault system? It's not like we can simply store detailed explanations, guides, media... unless we find a way to make them into obfuscated tiktok videos apparently on nonsense or makeup tutorials.

!rant;

A senior front end developer with 8 years of experience asked me today what does 'this' refer to in a function() inside of a property in an object, and why it doesn't work outside of the function!

I wanted to shout FUCK MY LIFE! But I held myself and explained it to her.

Worst part is I still don't qualify for 'senior' in my job title (less than 3 years of experience), hence my lower pay.

The first dev project, like real dev project, I participated in was a school one and it was double.
The class was meant to make us learn about the software's life cycle, so the teacher wanted us to develop a simple, yet complicated, thing: a Web platform to help tutors send/refer students to the university services (psychologist, nutriologist, etc) and to keep track of them visits.
We all agreed on it being easy.
Boy were we so wrong.
I was appointed as dev leader as well as some others (I was the programming leader, the other ones were the DB guy and the security guy) and as such I was in charge of the technology used (well, now we all know that the client is the one in charge of that as well as the designer) and I chose Django because we had some experience with it. We used it for the two projects the teacher asked us to do (the second one was to find a little shop and develop something for it, obviously with the permission and all that), but in the second one I decided to use React on top of Djangl, which ended being a really good combination tho.
So, in the first project, the other ones (all the classroom) started to discuss and decided to use some other stuff like unnecessary carousel for images, unnecessary functions, they created mock ups for stuff that was never there to begin with, etc. It was really awful, we had meetings with the client (the teacher) with updates on the project, and in not a single one he was satisfied with the results. But still, we continued with the path the majority chose and it was the worst: deadlines were not met, team members just vanished until the end of the semester, one guy broke his leg (and was a dev leader) and never said a word not did anything about the project. At the end, we presented literal garbage, the UI was awful, its colors were so ugly because we had to use the university official colors, the functionality was not there, there literally was a calendar to make appointments for the services (when did the client ask for that? No one knows), but hey, you could add services and their data to it, was it what the client wanted? Of course not! What do you think we are? Devs?
Suffice to say that, although we passed with good grades, the project and the team was shit (and I'm counting me in)
The good part is that the second project was finished by me and it looked really good, yet it didn't matter, the first project was supposed to be used by the university, but that thing was unusable.
Then, in the subsequent vacations I tried to make pretty and functional/usable, yet I failed because I had a deadline for another thing I had to do, but hey, the login screen looked amazing!

No proper normalization and database structure practices seems to continue to be the bane of my fucking existence at work.

One would think that it would be the quirks carried through by the language stacks in question, those are fucking absolutely ridiculously horrible by the way, y'all think you've seen bad Javascript and PHP? these would make you cry, laugh, wonder in amazement and then fucking pity me and eventually buy me a beer NO JOKE.

Y'all think you have seen some obscenely unoptimized SQL code? think of the worst fucking possible output from the shitty-est most error prone boundary checking inefficient ORM out there and multiply it by 10k. Then refer to my other point, and do the same thing for me which culminates in alcoholic consumption.

Worst thing? the developer that wrote most of this is a college level TEACHER rn....i've met the smug piece of shit, he acted severely condescending to everyone around him and I just smiled because I know how much of a piece of shit he is.

The other dude in question (it was two of them that I am talking about) left for another city and currently holds a senior developer position....i-fucking-magine that.

Fuck I hate these mfkers and I really wish they gave me a chance to fucking blow up on them.

In a class right now. The rants are more interesting than what the professor is teaching!
How our professors teach:
Step 1: Open up a PDF of the subject book.
Step 2: Read everything line-by-line.
Step 3: "Refer the internet".

Yeah, because I don't have the book to read the shit you're teaching.

Does anyone know a good resource for learning how to use Git properly? I've learned piecemeal over the last year, but still run into stupid conflicts when transferring a project between machines that often requires me to redownload the repo and then download the changes from the dev server before starting again.

I'm an independent shop, so I don't have any senior devs or corporate policies to refer to for best practices.

Thanks in advance!

How many standard drinks (or alcohol) is 4 CL of gin?

In most countries, a standard drink or alcoholic beverage is commonly defined as containing approximately 14 grams (0.6 ounces) of pure alcohol. This amount of alcohol is found in various quantities of different types of alcoholic beverages.

A typical shot of distilled spirits, like gin, is often around 1.5 ounces (44.3 ml), which is roughly 4 centiliters (CL). If we assume that the gin has an alcohol content of around 40% (80 proof), then the pure alcohol content in 4 CL of gin would be:

4 CL * 0.4 (alcohol content) = 1.6 CL of pure alcohol.

To convert this to standard drinks, which are typically based on 14 grams of pure alcohol, you would divide the amount of pure alcohol by the amount of alcohol in a standard drink:

1.6 CL / 14 grams = ~0.11 standard drinks.

So, approximately 4 CL of gin would contain about 0.11 standard drinks worth of alcohol. Keep in mind that alcohol content can vary between different brands and types of gin, so this is a rough estimate. It's always a good idea to refer to the label on the bottle for more accurate information.

Thanks, Chat GPT, i'm going to go ahead and drink 10 of these gin sodas and i'll only have had one standard drink!!!!

😂😂😂🤡🤡🤡

Happy friday ya'll