Dev: this task is done, can I put it in review and do something else?

Me: sure, of course.

Dev: cool, just be aware I'll make some changes to it later.

Me: ... wait, then it's not done.

Dev: no it is, I just need to re-read it and make some changes.

Me: yeah, so it will be done when those changes are made.

Dev: but I don't know what those changes are.

Me: ... I get that ... but ... ok I'm extremely confused. Why do you think it's done.

Dev: because I've written everything I need to and I'm happy with it.

Me: ok so why do you want to make changes.

Dev: I don't.

Me: ... ... ... ... you ... you are really not being clear. If you don't want to make changes, and you are happy with it, why are you planning on making changes later ... after marking the task as done.

Dev: well if I re-read it and see something I don't like, I would like to change it.

Me: ok, so re-read it as many times as you like and make as many changes as you like. But don't mark it as done until it is done.

Dev: but it is done.

Me: no it's not.

Dev: it is, look.

Me: ... yeah looks ok at a quick glance.

Dev: ok so I can mark it as done?

Me: are you going to make more changes?

Dev: yes.

Me: then no.

Dev: why?

Me: BECAUSE ITS NOT DONE.

Dev: ok maybe I'm not explaining it clearly.

Me: ... we can both agree on that. Ok so to summarise, we don't mark something as done until we have stopped touching it. We don't half finish something and say it's done and comeback to it later. We mark it as done when we are happy with i.....

Dev: but I am happ.....

Me: *raises hand* I repeat, if it's done, we lock it away and stop touching it. If someone reads it and complains, we can come back to it with a new ticket. But it's not done until we think we are ready to send it on.

Dev: I am ready to send it, I just may want to change it.

Me: ... ... ... ... ... due to a new policy implemented just now, we are only allowed to send 1 email to a person each week. So unfortunately we can only send on 1 copy. So when you have that 1 copy, let me know.

Dev: ok, let me re-read it a few more times then.

Me: there you go.

OW FUCKING GREAT

BEEN CREATING THIS WEBSITE FOR 1 MONTH USING REACTJS. IT'S HALFWAY DONE. NOW THE HIGHER UPS CHANGES THEIR DECISION THAT WE HAVE TO MAKE IT WITH WORDPRESS.

FUUUUUCCCCKKKK. I'M FUCKING OUT.

Client: "Hi, there's a problem with this link"
Me: "How odd, I'll take a look right away"

-- 19 minutes later --

Client: "Has this been fixed?"
Me: "I'm working on it currently"
Client: "OK please let us know when it's done"
Me: "I will do"

-- 2 minutes later --

Client: "Hi, is this done?"
Me: "I've just told you I will let you know as soon as it's done"

-- 5 minutes later --

Client: "Hi, sorry to hassle, but is this done yet?"
Me: *starts twitching*
Me: "I am working on it and I will let you know when it's done"
Client: "OK, well don't worry about it, it doesn't really matter"
Me: *explodes*

Me: *receives SMS from ex girlfriend*
GF: "I'm horny, whatcha doing now?"
Me: "Not much, just working on the update system to this tool which will be used with mod. Can't talk right now"

This was the fastest "murdering of the mood" I ever done.

Manager: Oh my god have you heard of libraries? I don’t even need to hire developers anymore, everything can just be done with code other people have already built for free

Dev: Well you actually cause a bit of technical debt when you use an abstrac—

Manager: EVERY TICKET SHOULD BE DONE USING LIBRARIES GOING FORWARD.

Dev: …This is going to implode…Can we at least fund some of the libraries we end up using?

Manager: WHAT? NO! Open source developers are suckers, what idiot puts code on the internet for free?? I shouldn’t be required to fund their stupidity. Let’s just take their stuff and make money with it.

Dev: *Phone rings 100th time today from recruiter*. One sec I have to take this call……It’s urgent.

The next person who calls the server disruption/emergency line for something that is NOT related to a server wide issue/outage is going to get a rusty pipe with fucking sambal up their fucking ass.

I am so fucking done with this bullshit.

Was today national 'lets not use our brains and common sense' day or something?!?

People coming with the most fucking RETARDED questions.

'ive spend hours to try and figure out why my mail isnt sending,?!'

MAYBE TRY SPELLING YOUR FUCKING OWN EMAIL ADDRESS CORRECTLY?!?!?!

Tons more of the kind of shit that you can solve yourself within three FUCKING seconds.

I'm so fucking done with today.

There once approached me a client, with a request to be done. Here is a recap, with emphasis on time limits.

C: Ok, so we need this and this thing to be done that and that way...
*short talk about technical side of the project, unimportant to the rant*
C: Can it be done by 25th, this month? (It was 4th of the month)
M: No way, it'll take at least a week more, so realistically I'd say around 7th next month.
C (Had no option but to agree on the date)
*we arrange the price as well (was not a bad one at all)*

So I started working on the thing and one night, about a week or so in, I probably had a cup of tea too much, I suddenly have a breakthrough. I sat behind a computer from 22:00 till 17:00 next day, nonstop. I didn't even eat anything in the meantime. The project was far from done, but I did quite a lot of work. Anyhow, when I have completed the project, not only was I not over the deadline, it was 22nd of the month, so even before the wanted time! When I contacted the client and told him that I am done, he was ... let's just say very happy. The deployment went fine, but when I checked my bank account, for the payment, there was a surprise waiting for me. The number was 25% more than what we have arranged! Me, believing that it was a mistake, immediately messaged him about it and he responded:

No, this is just a small gift for you, because you finished that quickly.

(and not to forget, I have coded things for way less than those 25% and was completely fine with the price, so it was not a small amount)

Had to explain a developer from a wordpress dev agency where to find the wp-config.php file and what it does/what the values do.

This person has been doing this for years.

I looked at this config file for nearly the first time in my life.

I literally had to explain her which variables stood for/did/meant what.

I am fucking done with today.

Problems of Freelancer

Freelancer: Hey your app is​ ready.
Client : Can you add this ?
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment.
Client: As soon as this gets done.

Next Day...

Freelancer: Hey your app is​ ready.
Client : Thanks. This looks good if there is this feature. Can you help me with that?
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment.
Client: As soon as this gets done

Next Day..
Client : Blah Blah Blah
Freelancer: Sure, When am I getting payment

Frustration at peaks!!!

So I was hired about 4 months or so in this companty, we will name it 'Derp & Co.'

The first task they want me to do was to 'clean' an android app that, for what they told me:

- Previous dev fired. said that tasks have been done but totally a lie.
- Took a fully week of 2 fellows coworkers to 'undo' the mess.
- And for the last but not least, zero documentation, like ZERO.

So, I clone the repo, install android studio, blah blah blah, get hands to the pile of code and jesus...

- The whole app was working with a gargantuan json, there was no use of POJOs at all. Objects are for normies.
- A masive copy/paste code, like 'I will need this here, crtl-c... ctrl-v, DONE!'
- Threads are free, isn't it? let's just put a thread whenever I desire to make an HTTP request and not reuse code at all.

So... with this on mind, my first task is to make proper objects:
- Coworker: 'Sorry dev, we don't have documentation for this, you must debug the code to se what the server will send to you'.
- Me: 'Real?'

Shit... ok. So I first try to figure out how the hell is made my gargantuan json. A month was entirely lost to unravel this data and implement Objects, improve their code, reuse code, etc. but at the very end:

- coworker: 'Good job dev, when the POJOs are done, we can focus on the next task, whe have to define a new DATA MODEL because the one we are using now is not good at all'.

*note: the app is on production and working with all the previous 'features' and today it still on use on some enviroments.

- Me: 'Wait... this is a joke, now you want to define new data models? This should have been done in first place!' <WTF face>
- Coworker: 'I don't think so dev, Mr. boss have this list with things to improve on the app an this is the order of do the tasks'.

Mr. boss is on vacations, two days after he came back:

- Mr boss: 'Coworker said that you have been working with POJOs, is that right?'
- Me: 'Yes'
- Mr boss: 'Why? Did not see the need of a new data model?'
- Me: 'I told that to him, but he insist on "the order" of the list.
- Mr. boss <facepalm>

This is one of the few tales i have from 'Derp & Co.'

PS: Sorry if i made a mistake on writing, english is not my first language and maybe I have done some mistakes.

I'm so fucking done with all those "woke" YouTube programming tutorials like: "Why you should NEVER use else statements", "Why functions should ALWAYS return a value", "Why switch statements are actually EVIL" and stuff like this
I swear to fucking god

College placements, one of the leading tech companies comes to hire people on day 1, I miss the first round coz I overslept, woke up and realized the test started an hour ago, finally went in after the test was done. They still let me take the coding test but with reduced time, and kept talking to themselves that if this guy gets through, I'm fucking done with placements. Managed to do well in the test and then proceeded to the interviews, aced the interviews and was offered a job. People at work still call me "that guy who turned up late and still got the job"

Finally done with being on call/standby so thought I'd order myself a pizza calzone 😍

I'm not saying that this thing is small but it's smaller than my hands.

I don't have very big hands 😭

"We need you to take control and make these decisions on your own."
...
"Why have you done this without checking with us first?!"

It is safe to say this can be done with family members as well

IBM

I have replied to them with scripts, curl commands, and Swagger docs (PROVIDED TO SUPPORT THEIR API), everything that could possibly indicate there's a bug. Regardless, they refuse to escalate me to level 1 support because "We cant reproduce the issue in a dev environment"

Well of course you can't reproduce it in a dev environment otherwise you'd have caught this in your unit tests. We have a genuine issue on our hands and you couldnt give less of a shit about it, or even understand less than half of it. I literally gave them a script to use and they replied back with this:

"I cannot replicate the error, but for a resource ID that doesnt exist it throws an HTTP 500 error"

YOUR APP... throws a 500... for a resource NOT FOUND?????????!!!!!!!!!! That is the exact OPPOSITE of spec, in fact some might call it a MISUSE OF RESTFUL APIs... maybe even HTTP PROTOCOL ITSELF.

I'm done with IBM, I'm done with their support, I'm done with their product, and I'm DONE playing TELEPHONE with FIRST TIER SUPPORT while we pay $250,000/year for SHITTY, UNRELENTING RAPE OF MY INTELLECT.

Just had a fucking god-mode moment.

My dear @Divisionbyzero asked me to help out with DKIM on his Linux server.

Although I'd never done it before, with the help of a search engine and root access to the server, I managed to somehow figure out what was going wrong and fix it.

This is quite deeper than I ever went with debugging!

Also a big thanks to Linux for being open, otherwise I'd be fucking fucked right now.

Boss: Why is it that you are still not done with this?
Me: Because I keep getting interrupted
Boss: By what?

FUCKING SHIT.
I'm at my first Hackathon with my best friends in life and there has never been a time when I've felt this miserable all my life.
The theme is IoT (something idk jackshit about) and people here are done with the projects when we are still at the idea stage.
Yes, it's true that this shit is intense but I really want to do good at this.
This is what I've learned from my first Hackathon:
1. Prepare your shit.
Unless the problem statements are given on the spot, you should've discussed everything that you would be doing and not divert. (We spent 5 hours on a problem statement and then we decided not to go with it.)
2. Have people with different abilities who you can trust to get the work done without you having to give a second thought.
3. Don't you dare build a sub-par application. What's the fucking use of that? Don't do it for the certificate or the stickers. If you do that, then how the fuck can you make yourself put those stickers on your laptop?!
4. Have food. Keep yourself healthy and up to max potential.
5. DO NOT BE DISCOURAGED. A lot of people will look like they're done with the shit. You know what you have to do now? NOT GIVE A FUCK! Just focus and do your thing and make it awesome.

Manager: As you all know I called this meeting to discuss what we will do with all of the extra resources if we are done early. I was thinking a start a new ap—

Dev: We are not going to be done early. There are two weeks left and we are way behind schedule.

Manager: Don’t be so pessimistic! You never know when or how fast tickets will be completed.

Dev: Yes I do…I’m the one doing them

Fuck this fucking sql error for the past 2,5 fucking hours.

I'm so fucking done with this bullshit.

I just had a major breakthrough on a project 😊

Just standing there chatting with my dad (also a dev), while preparing for the new years feast, and got this amazing idea that I just had to try. 30 minutes later I'm done with the script and it works flawlessly 😊😅

Small update on my UWP File Explorer:

Got some nice work done on the Navigation Box. A right click (Or long tap on touch displays) gives a context menu with subfolders, as opposed to the Classic application which had a drop-down button (This is not as friendly for touch, in my opinion)

A left click navigates to that folder.

Been a bit sick from my surgery, so not much progress these past few days, but I'm still happy with this.

Are you done yet?
Is it ready for review ?
How far?
Any updates?
When can I check?
We are wasting time..
How long will it take ?
Are you saying this will take 2 days to complete?
😪😪😪
Pls raise a cup with me if you can relate.
Add yours too.

Worst part of being a dev: "we need this done by the end of the week"

Me: "ok what are the specifications?"

PMs: "not sure yet, we have a meeting with the client on Thursday."

Me: "cool, I'll look at it Monday."

Don't come to me with deadlines before you know what I'm building.

I'm so done with this. Fuck you and your motherfucking updates!

Back on Mint :)

Client: I saw this feature on a site and I want it on mine.

Me: I’m almost done with the project. You can’t possibly expect me to start adding new features now.

Client: Just go online and copy the code. I won’t take that long. It shouldn’t be difficult if you’re a professional.

WTF is wrong with people. The worlds gone to shit. Who does he think he is?

So I tried to start learning Spring 5

How the fuck do you guys do it? Holy shit.

30 seconds in:

"Spring really isn't hard, you start with this request handler interacting with a view parser..."

Alright, sounds good

2 minutes in:

"So in order to use SpringResponseDriverActionHandlerServiceRequesterService you'll need to import com.org.java.spring.util.driver.comagain.request.response.request.drivers and include this 37 level deep nested XML property and finally extend this abstract class and implement it over an iterable list with this specific annotation aaaaaaand.... Done"

> Hello, world!

"See, spring is easy!"

WHY THE FUCK DO YOU KEEP WASTING MY FUCKING TIME WITH POINTLESS MEETINGS ABOUT WHAT METHODOLOGIES YOU GONNA USE TO GET THE FUCKING DATA????

JUST GIVE ME THE FUCKING DATA AFTER YOU DISCUSS THIS SHIT AND TELL WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE TO DO WITH IT!!!

FUCKING WASTING MY FUCKING TIME AND WANTING SHIT TO BE DONE! WHAT THE FUCK!

I'm done with this fuckin shit.
Why it doesnt even work.
Fuck it. I will look at it tomorrow.

*after 5 mins*
opens terminal, editor:
- o boi, let's go again

*3weeks into the project*
Designer: I am done with the designs
Me* finally.
5Hrs Later:
Here's the link to the new designs for this project.

I am so done with this. Graphics in TurboC++ will literally drive you crazy.

IPod didn't sync well on my Linux machines so decided to give windows - in a highly isolated environment disconnected from the Internet behind a firewall and sandbox - a shot with itunes.

- during the installation it wouldn't detect the fucking harddrive multiple times (genuine unlicensed copy) and after the 4-5th time it's random-fuckingly recognized out of fucking nowhere; I didn't change shit.
- crashes (blue screen and freezes) multiple times during the installation, multiple retries and suddenly it works(?!)
- it took about 10 minutes (!!!!!!!) to install 10+ drivers for an iPod and an external hdd:
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done

WHY INSTALL THOSE FUCKERS 5 FUCKING TIMES?!

- iTunes installation fails multiple times without error code (unknown error occured, restoring to original state...),just said fuck it and clicked the shortcut after the ***th fail and it works just like this, THANKS FOR NOTIFYING ME (NOT)!
- iTunes has to restore the entire ipod, this was done with iTunes in the store I bought it already, thanks for nothing.
-restore takes 30+ minutes?!
-syncs the iPod 3 times afterwards.

*clicks close button*
*are you sure you want to quit? Sync in progress*
*oh shit, cancels*
*itunes quits*
*?!?!?*

*tries to import media library*
*seagate hdd suddenly not detected*

I'm fucking tired of this bullshit, windows and iTunes can go die in a fucking corner after getting ass raped while their genitals are being scraped off layer by fucking layer and dipped into fucking acid.

I call this the Distraction Stack.

[working on code]

"Hey, can you look at this bug?"

[
working on code,
looking at bug
]

"Can I bother you for a second?"

[
working on code,
looking at bug,
being bothered
]

"When you're done with her can you stop by my desk?"

[
working on code,
looking at bug,
stopping by your stupid desk
being bothered
]

It's enough to make me pop.

I need to explain to a client how pc work. I use this image. Now every time my client explain what a pc is start talking with "it worked like a WC"... What I have done?

When you have a product owner who, on her first day of the project, asks you ' What do you mean by UI?' and a week later question a UI dev why should something take 3 days?

Are you fucking kidding me? I am done with this shit.

How motherfucking difficult can it be to port forward something internally?!

I've been on this for fucking hours and I'm so fucking done with this shit.

I know I'm doing something wrong myself but I can't find a good resource 😠

*Never* do CSS tweaks over the phone and tell the customer to refresh and approve the change. This will lead to endless tweaking andlong calls at any hour, and further trivializes your work by making it look like everything can be done instantly. Better to have them send you the changes they want, then send them an update later once they have been done—perhaps with a bit of a delay to further stave off the sense of instant gratification.

Also, if they keep requesting changes to changes after you’ve done what they asked, be prepared to let them know that future changes will incur an additional fee.

Me, whenever i work with something other than java: "Wow, this could be done so much easier with java"

Fuck big tech companies. Fuck their surveillance capitalism. Fuck their monopolies and anti-competitive bullshit. Fuck their tax dodging. Fuck their fighting against the right to repair. Fuck their worship of revenue above all else. Fuck their 30% cut on everything. Fuck their world-destroying revenue models built on heartless AI and zero customer service. Fuck their automated banning systems with zero explanation as to why the fuck they've banned you, with zero fucking recourse. Fuck their amoral psychopathic CEOs and their fucking space rockets. Fuck all this shit. When I'm done with this IT project I'm fucking done with tech.

Okay I'm done now.

Using 10% React with the rest in Jquery. Importing a giant legacy CSS blob in a newly made SCSS file. Two thirds of the API documentation in docblocks, the rest in Markdown files. Half of the repositories in Github, the other half in Bitbucket. The root of every project littered with ymls and jsons and readmes of stupidly named tools no one has ever heard of.

Fuck your partial refactoring, fuck your little experiments, fuck all this half work. I'm so done with this shit. 😡

Oh man, today just gets better and better...

Manager: * Creates ticket, which has a link to a shared pdf, with each page being a link to another ticket in our JIRA with unrelated bugs of what we are currently working on. *

fullStackClown: I'm closing this ticket and putting this feedback in the original ticket that I assigned to you to review days ago.

Manager: Rages like a little baby and removes my access to said shared pdf.

fullStackClown: Welp, looks like I'm done for the day! Cheers!

A conversation that me and my boss had this week:
Boss: "Hey, why is this not progressing"
Arcsector: - "We're waiting on system users to move their destinations"
"We need the system in the database in order to move it"
- "Okay awesome - let's move it, oh wait, I can't do it because I don't have access, here's the stuff that needs to be done: a, b, and c"
"Oh I'm actually not able to help with that"
- "So then how are we supposed to get it done?"
"idk but also this other issue is something missions are complaining about"
- "oh I already am talking to them about it and it should be remedied by the team creating the problem because it's a false positive"
"Well we need to solve it still"
- "We would've solved it already but it has dependencies with other projects that we're still working on because we don't have enough people"
"We cant get you more people because we don't have the budget"
- "Then this stuff will have to wait"
"Get it done"

ACTUALLY SCREAMING! Why cant people understand that there are conesequences for their actions??!!

Client:
This has to be done with in 160 hours.
Me:
Seems doable

After maybe 100 hours of developing:
Client:
This is great and all but we decided to change the specs little (a lot) surely you can code this whole thing again in the rest of the time.

Man, most memorable has to be the lead devops engineer from the first startup I worked at. My immediate team/friends called him Mr. DW - DW being short for Done and Working.

You see, Mr. DW was a brilliant devops engineer. He came up with excellent solutions to a lot of release, deployment, and data storage problems faced at the company (small genetics firm that ships servers with our analysis software on them). I am still very impressed by some of the solutions he came up with, and wish I had more time to study and learn about them before I left that company.

BUT - despite his brilliance, Mr. DW ALWAYS shipped broken stuff. For some reason this guy thinks that only testing a single happiest of happy path scenarios for whatever he is developing constitutes "everything will work as expected!" As soon as he said it was "done", but golly for him was it "done". By fucking God was that never the truth.

So, let me provide a basic example of how things would go:
my team: "Hey DW, we have a problem with X, can you fix this?"
DW: "Oh, sure. I bet it's a problem with <insert long explanations we don't care about we just want it fixed>"
my team: "....uhh, cool! Looking forward to the fix!"
... however long later...
DW: "OK, it's done. Here you go!"
my team: "Thanks! We'll get the fix into the processing pipelines"
... another short time later...
my team: "DW, this thing is broken. Look at all these failures"
DW: "How can that be? It was done! I tested it and it worked!"
my team: "Well, the failures say otherwise. How did you test?"
DW: "I just did <insert super basic thing>"
my team: "...... you know that's, like, not how things actually work for this part of the pipeline. right?"
DW: "..... But I thought it was XYZ?"
my team: "uhhhh, no, not even close. Can you please fix and let us know when it's done and working?"
DW: "... I'll fix it..."

And rinse and repeat the "it's done.. oh wait, it's broken" a good half dozen times on average. But, anyways, the birth of Mr. Done and Working - very often stuff was done, but rarely did it ever work!

I'm still friends with my team mates, and whenever we're talking and someone says something is done, we just have to ask if it's done AND working. We always get a laugh, sadly at the excuse of Mr. DW, but he dug his own hole in this regard.

Little cherry on top: So, the above happened with one of my friends. Mr. DW created installation media for one of our servers that was deployed in China. He tested it and "it was done!" Well, my friend flies out to China for on-site installation. He plugs the install medium in and goes for the install and it crashes and burns in a fire. Thankfully my friend knew the system well enough to be able to get everything installed and configured correctly minus the broken install media, but definitely the most insane example of "it's done!" but sure as he'll "it doesn't work!" we had from Mr. DW.

Today at work I found this in the code...

if (argCount < 2 && argCount > 3) {
// log invalid arg count
return;
}

And this passed code inspection and has been sitting there unnoticed for about a year and a half... 😂

Whether it's mixing up and with or, or forgetting a semicolon, we've all done it at some point! 😊

Probably the last person to enter this, but fuck, it's done! Somewhat, but not totally inspired by this week's theme, I went to Ikea today and bought this brand-new beauty, along with a rug and small LED strip and OH. MY. GOD.

Technically didn't clean it off because it has never been dirty before. More pics in the comments. Holy shit I love it.

Can someone just please come over and safe me? I am soooooo done with all this bullshit code. I understand why people loathe PHP, it enables totally worthless people to carry the title 'programmer' because hurrrdurrr look at my website, I made this. Fuck yes, you made that and you should SHAME yourself! What the actual flying fuck I can't begin to explain the monstrosities that I find checking out this worthless pile of fucking garbage.

User passwords saved as plaintext in database? Check!

Using hungarian notation, camecase and snakecase inconsistently? Check!

Typejuggling like you're the mainman of the Insane Clown Posse? Check!

Everything is a mess, there is no documenation, no consistency no nothing, this is straight from the 9th circle of programmers hell.

Aaaaaaarghhhhh I AM SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS WORTHLESS PILE OF GARBAGE!!!!

The original dev prefixed every spagetthifile with his copyright shite so im gonna look him up and highfive him in the face with my laptop and after that printing out my resignation letter in comic sans fontsize 78 because FUCK YOU

So done.

YOU STUPID APPLICATION MANAGER STOP PROLONGING THIS MEETING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD this is a daily scrum not a status report you solid twat stop asking when something will be done when it hasn't even been worked on yet

Dev: "I'll start working on the thing today, might take a day or two to finish development"
Twat: "Will it be ready for testing tmorrow"
D: "Maybe by late tomorrow? If all goes well"
T: "So it'll be tested by tomorrow"
D: "Uhhhh wait"
T: "It'll be done by tomorrow"
D: "But"

GODDAMNIT MAN HE'LL TELL YOU TOMORROW IF IT'S DONE OR NOT AND IF IT CAN BE TESTED I want to punch you so hard in the face with a spiked mallet covered in wasp stingers and hello kitty juice to excacerbate your diabetes you filthy piece of excrement waiting to be smeared across the pavement with my boot

Anyone else flipping tired of hearing: we need more this, more that, more blacks, more women, more whatever, in tech?

We don’t fucking need more anyone in anything.

We just need sane, talented and hard working people to get the job done well. And do that with courtesy to all person.

That's it, I'm fucking done with this fucking bullshit of a year, really, everyone is fucking dying, just end already

When you’re way more experienced and new to a team and are met with “but this is how we’ve done it for ages, and it’s done fine for us” but the sprint performance shows they’ve not completed one in 2 years.

I often find that deadlines are "conjured up" with no bearing on the tasks at hand. It has to be done by this date because the Client goes to France for 2 weeks. Piss off.

We have RGB shit in computers...
We have dev ducks...
We need programmable RGB dev ducks that can change their color with a scripting interface.

If you choose to make your duck's color correspond to the compiler warning and errors displayed this can be done. Also, maybe have it plays sounds too.

So there is this one person who keeps asking for help from everybody and expects them to do their code .... And surprisingly they do....

I was done with that shit when I was expected to code for the person .... So I did do it with a comment saying "I have no idea why I get paid" 😂😂😂

I'm waiting for the reviewer to notice this now 😂😂😂

Fuck this, fuck that, fuck the buffer, fuck AES, fuck crypto, fuck node-forge, fuck IV and browsers, once I am done with this fucking cryptographic wrapper on both client and server, the first person to say decrypt and Javascript in the same sentence in front of me will get their own dick in their ass. The guy that said mixing computer and crypto was a bad idea was fucking right

Fuck C++ I am so done with this garbage

No I do not accept differing opinions

I believe this was the last attempt I had at doing a project for this customer before I just stopped replying to emails. I cannot emphasise enough how brutal it was communicating with this person. This was years ago. I'll keep it simple:

Customer: "Yeah so we need this page to look *exactly* like this. I've attached a picture, and I'll need this done soon because we're running a newsletter campaign soon."

Me: "Alright, I'll have it done by the end of the week." (I paid a student to do it, their work was impressive, it looked *EXACTLY* like the picture, but was now a functional web page)

*end of week*

Customer: "This is too exact!! I was hoping you guys would have some creativity, and have it do this and that!"

Me: "You said exact, we made it exact. I can do additional work to it."

Customer: "Well, we're not paying for additional work!!"

I left it at that.

"I'm done with all this BS. Visual appearance doesn't matter, will uninstall all themes first thing in the morning"

* stays up until 4 AM googling "geometric theme for zsh"*

This is brainfuck. Has anyone ever done something useful with it ?

Why isn't this working? I've wrote this same type of code at least 1000 times. Why must there always a problem? Literally every time I try and get something done there is always some stupid error and it's PISSING ME OFF. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH MY BRAIN AN...oh...I misspelled "fucntion"

Boss: some consultants worked on this feature extending some legacy code
Boss: it's 90% done
Boss: they used FTP. It uses iframes and we fired them when they couldn't get the frontend modules working in sync with the backend.
Me: git checkout -b herewegoagain
git diff-tree --no-commit-id --name-only -r 666w3wl4d
*copy output list of files to sublime text 3; select all lines; add to each:
gitk --follow [filename] > src/.notes/herewegoagain/[filename].diff
*examines....
Me: It's -10% done. you'll know I'm almost done when I enter the fugue state. You'll find me at this address. Give me this USB stick and a 4 pack of redbull and I'll do the merge.

!rant What have you done with my life DevRant? I'm now addicted and can't quit. Meth is softer than this. 😐

Im on vacation and my boss is terrorising my phone number. Having answered after the 5 th call he claims I’m not on vacation until i sent out a handover to all my colleagues. Fuck this shit I’m so done with them

Customer demands some complicated shit be done within a few hours to align with their schedule.
Me: this is not aligned with reality.
Customer: ...

The layout for my little side project was working fine in IE last week. Made some server side additions over the weekend and now the layout is broken... in IE only. Guess who's putting in a user-agent redirect to a "Works best in Chrome or Firefox" page? 😉

Boss: I want Module 4 (regular complexity) done by tomorrow.
Me: *with not enough experience to get it done within a day. Still does it by staying up all night*

Next Day

Boss: I didn't want this, skip rest of the modules and jump to Module 10 (extremely complex) and I want it tomorrow.

Me: ;_;

“Hi - we’ve done an analysis of the front end codebase and we’ve determined that it would be a good idea to start using Bootstrap. Are there any concerns with this?”

“Hey - no concerns, we actually already use Bootstrap in all those places.”

“I was not aware. So you’re saying there are concerns?”

Had a recruiter say I was saying "wasting his time" by constantly declining job opportunities he sent via email (it was a mass email too). Another recruiter started questioning why I didn't work for this other company that didn't seem to have technology as a decent focus at its core. I'm honestly done with recruiters.

it's decided, i'm creating a programming language specifically to trigger SJW (like the idea of C+=) which starting to corrupt this industries.

perhaps it's not gonna be huge, so i will blend this with my original idea; a simple language to fix python syntax that a lot of people didn't like who come from C like syntax which transpiled to python code.

maybe it's silly, but this need to be done. at least for my self.

Seeing the people in this community is usually enough to motivate me.

There are amazing people here from all over the place. To see what they have done, and be able to talk with them is fucking inspiring.

I came to this company. I saw spaghetti code. I told myself to write clean code and also clean the existing code. I took too much pressure for too little return. I am done with this shit. I will now write clean code but fuck the old spaghetti code!

PM sends email to development team with the whole management team in cc.

"Guys, the data is not updating correctly! Make sure all the updates are being done! If we can't get this right then we can just forget about this whole thing!"

Me: Yes, because making generalized statements and inflammatory remarks actually help in correcting the problems...

After two weeks with Ubuntu - I'm done with this. I'm going back to Windows.

Why? Well, it fixes some Windows problems, but at the same time new ones are popping and they are even bloody worse.

Worst Manager/Higher Up? I guess that would be me. There was this time I was so frustrated with my team, that I literally asked them to make a list of words they want to curse me with, cause we won't be going home till the work is done the right way.

I haven't felt joy programming for a while now.

My work is just tasks that can be done by a monkey if they understand how the framework works and at home I can't come up with any ideas that are exciting, challenging or useful.

I feel like all my creativeness is leaking dry having to deal with deadlines about implementing this text change with critical^3 priority and other boring shit

Sat down with the Project Management team today to discuss a signage installation. This is how the conversation went...

Me: Right, so we need to get the hardware on-site asap so we can get this configured before it goes over to the production guys to have the facisa installed.
Them: That's fine we have plenty of time. Stop rushing things.
Me: Okay, so do we have the story board in place ready for development?
Them: Nope. Hasn't been done by the designer yet because he is in a bad mood.
Me: Okay so when does the client want this?
Them: 3 Weeks' time
Me: But it is atleast a week of dev time?
Them: Sure. But you can work late if needed...right?

This is a typical conversation between them and me. I'm the sole developer here. So done with today.

I mean, I really, really like Linux, don't get me wrong but I don't know if it's my Pi or something I've done but I've always gotten issues with it after a few weeks/months.
Everything will flow smoothly until it crashes, and it won't start the x server, and pretty much everything tells me there is a segmentation fault. A fresh install fixes the issue but I also loose all the stuff I've done with my previous install. Really annoying and I haven't found a definitive answer as to why this happens.
Oh well.

I was done arguing with people about undefined and implementation defined behaviors and what the standard is. I had to make this after someone told "which standard book are you talking about? Which university teaches it?"

After about four hours of email server setup I'm sitting here with a citadel setup, not being able to login, Google didn't help, I'm fucking done with this shit

so folks,
my very first question on stackoverflow got downvoted.
im done with this place. i dont feel good also there... dunno

"Ohhhh, I would love to try Android, but it is sooooo ugly..."
How to deal with an apple fanboy saying something like this every time I mention that apple could done better(their software or hardware)
???

This happened yesterday during 1-2-1 meeting

My dear teamleader telling me.

"You're just a stupid consultant"

Well, this 'stupid consultant' has had enough of your bullshit and will look for future endeavors elsewhere.

You are free to consider your options and make the bad decisions, dear team 'leader'.

Cry at the sheer amount of work 'your' project really entails and I will revel in your failure

I'm done with this guy.

Team leaders should be ousted if they fail their team members and the projects they are responsible for.

This is the fifth time that I've done this and I still screw up node with nodejs

Me: oh boy i have so much fun stuff planned for this weekend, better get my work done before it

My immune system: here have this flu with some pink eye on top

Fuck unreasonable deadlines. Just do your stuff as if you have the time of the world. Stop compromising the quality of your work and things are going to be done when they're done. Good quality stuff that's worth the wait.

I started to tell this to myself this week. For months now I took the bait that everything is urgent. And whatever crap management want has to be done yesterday. But.... Well... They pushed it too effing far.

Redo this module that took the former team about six months to finish. You have 10 days.

Well... What? Everyone is saying yes?... Everyone going full code monkey making no progress?

This is the moment I stop compromising and stop listening to your suggestions. I am going to do what I know how to do, the way I know it works, and I will not cut one corner based off your suggestions. I'm sorry, I've been dealing with this shit for too long already, and I don't want to suffer the consequences of degrading the quality of what I write anymore.

Have any of you ever done this or worked with people who do this?

MOCHA YOU FUCKING BITCH, THERE IS A DONE() CALLBACK BEING CALLED IN THIS TEST, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM??? I WILL RAPE YOUR FUCKING SOURCE CODE. But really mocha test, why u no work so we can both move on with our lives 😣😦😞

Hoo lets do this app on windows with Visual Studio, never done windows desktop apps and I want to learn :D
....
....
2 days later : boot -> linux -> eclipse -> files -> new Java project. 😑😑

Not for me sorry...

Importing modules in python is the biggest shit i have done in my life. ALWAYS SOMETHING IS NOT FOUND. I have no fuckin clue who came up with this shit. I fuckin hate python for that so so much
EASY LANGUAGE GO TO HELL

Someone wanted me to make a full system from zero with good UI/UX, for 2 different user types (think marketplace style), admin area, and cool features that could only be done through phones because the tech is not available in web. All of this with good security due to the delicate information it would handle. Also of course subscription support as well.

By myself, within a year.

So fucking tired of priority shifting. How the hell is anyone supposed to get shit done with 500 fucking meetings and between each one you're told do something different?

This is critical you must do it now! No this!

My response, fuck you I'm going home my head hurts let me know what you'd like me to code and when you've decided add a day for annoying me.

I hate all of this AI fearmongering that's been going on lately in the main stream media. Like seriously, anyone who has done any real work with modern AI/ML would know its about as big of a threat to humanity as a rouge web developer armed with a stick.

Had another shouting contest today with this manager-of-some-sort. So yeah, I’m practically done with this company.

(PSA: serious replies to this kind of wk tag might be best suited under Random)

"The way you've done this seems much less complicated that what I would've come up with."

"You've been reading Clean Code?"

"I didn't think that was possible, nice."

And finally, the most extreme one:

"Can you print this code for me so I can hang it on my wall of good code?"

Client: We want all of this done with only this "Web Stack" because everyone else in the industry is licking its balls, Just get it done, we need a taste of it too.

Me: lick mine instead?

I'm freaking done trying to get Linux on my machine. I've tried every distro with many different versions of the kernel and I always run into the same problem on my desktop.

The computer super stutters for 2 seconds ish than freezes.

I've spent DAYS looking into this issue trying to find something. The worst part is that it can happen 5 minutes when I boot or 5 hours. At first I thought it was Compton. Then I thought I installed arch wrong. Maybe an update to the BIOS? How about downloading updated microcode? Maybe this obscure bug with AMD processors and setting power idle to typical? Nothing. I'm now behind on my school work because of the massive amount of time ive spent getting this fixed. It works just fine on my laptop, but it doesn't work on the machine I built to code with. I'm done. Give me Force Lightning, a red lightsaber, and call me a Sith baby because I'm joining the dark side. Here I come Windows.

For those who are wondering my setup:
Ryzen 7 1700
Rx 480
Asus x-370 prime
16 gb Corsair RAM

And no, Windows has never had this bug.

So, I got this new coworker of mine, he's 5 years older than me and says he's got a loooot of experience with html, css und javascript. Nice. Boss wants us to blur some text on a website, I show him how to do it with css "filter: blur(4px)".

5 minutes later he's all proud and says "done". I think nice, check the code - and see this moron having put an <img> png in there, having blurred the text with photoshop. Short memory, anyone?

On a doomed project. Nobody seems to know what anyone was suppose to have done last week, or the plan for this week.

I've warned them more times than I can count.

I could help, but I'll just sit here with my feet up, eating a snickers and watch them panic

I dislike the damage web development tools have done to my programming habits.

The rapid feedback provided from the development environment (e.g. hot-reloads) encourages me to constantly bang out code with very little consideration for its side-effects.

This tendency has become a handicap when I write instructions for hardware with much less resources, such as a microcontroller.

When you already have a huge deadline that's barely doable, and then your boss shows up with yet another task he forgot to ask you to do!

And of course this has to be done right this afternoon... 😵

We have a Monday meeting at 07:30. Yes, I have to BE at work at 07:30.

Now, my boss knows full well that I have to fight through traffic every single fucking day and also that I travel for on average just over an hour. Some days we're looking at closer to 2 hours!

And, without fail, the meeting will start at 07:30 with or without me. There are days that I catch the arse end of the meeting (like today) or other days were I miss the meeting altogether.

I'm done with this company in any case and am currently looking for alternative employment. And I'm also done with going to these people and talking about this!

I hate my country. I hate how everything around me is done poorly: roads, houses, production, & stuff. I hate how my countrymen are settling with just good enough or how they are okay with mediocrity.

This is a rant. I'm a dev. Hope that counts on devRant LOL

Freelance client calls freaking out because she needed the website changes done by yesterday morning because she had some huge meeting with potential investors....

I feel bad but I don't, she never told me anything about needing it done by Sunday morning.

This is exactly why I hate freelance work. Lack of communication and then they blame you

Manager:
Hey this client sent us a list with all of their employees in this format... we would tell them to input it themselves but they're a pretty big client, so could you do it?

Me: Sure

*3 hours later*
... why am I taking so long...?
I look back at my code, and see that I've done a whole framework to input data into our system, which accepts not only the client's format but it's actually pretty abstract and extensible for any format you'd like, all with a thorough documentation.
*FACEPALM*
Why can I do this with menial jobs and not for our main code?

Headhunter called about a rejection for an assignment I did:

Assignment had malformed data examples
Assignment had unrealistic timespan for completion
Assignment used item stocks for a shop setup
Assignment didn't use any prices just item stocks

Who builds a webshop without prices in the first place?

So done with this job hunting assessment bullshit.

I'm so fucking done today.

The VB project I ranted about earlier was apparently just the top of the iceberg of madness that is my workplace.
So the same ninjacoder who managed to code himself as a dependency in the VB project apparently had his greasy little fingers in a bunch of other projects around here.
A script for automating new workstation installs that went haywire last week had traces from this Omnipotent mastermind all over it. He got us this time with static urls and zero errorhandling.
Well played sir.
Getting so done with undocumented projects that I have to dig through several hours just to find and fix.

##Design to front-end conversion

Me - Send me the designs so i can start working it

Graphic Designer - Done ( Sends PSD files )

Me - Send me them separately, element by element, with transparency, color codes and flattened designs not PSD's

GD - Done

Me - Opens email to see elements that should be transparent saved as jpg's

Me - Opens PSD's, crop and save elements.

Meanwhile explains next time do this and that so it'll be easier.

Usually this happens few times a month

Just love it when the client discloses their requirements in phases. M sitting here with the complete stack waiting for him to come online and fuck me a little more as he discloses the next phase. Client's done this 3 times already. Fuck that asshole.

I hate programming as a profession, I'm done with it. Tried switching jobs, tried all the frameworks, tried different work environments, tried working less, but I don't wanna fool myself anymore. I fucking hate it.

Not sure where I'm going with this, just had to type it out somewhere.

My reward for understanding this thing is an early night. Time for bed :) remind me not to submit this assignment with the comments still in it. As I have done before.

Have to present a school project I've been working in for three weeks with my team.

My part of the presentation is done, my part of the project is done.
The fucking sysadmin doesn't have his fucking part ready...

ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS SET UP A FUCKING WEBSERVER, IMPORT A DATABASE, EDIT THE HOST FILE AND WRITE A SMALL 2 PAGE DOCUMENT ON THE INFRASTRUCTURE.

Each of the 4 "roles" within the project need to present their own part, guess whose part of the presentation isn't there...

I am so fucking done with this guy and 2 others in the team...

I just don't get how you can spend 1000's of € per year on uni and then not take it seriously.

Im learning Advanced Computing in a institute. Prior to that I have done many projects with Unity 3D, MEAN and C#. But guy who is teaching is very rude every time to the class. 'you people are stupid' 'you cant do anything on your own' 'that's why your here'. And Im self tought programer so Im getting really angry at such comments. How to deal with this?? 😥😫

Oh my effing goodness...just went through the repo of an app we're working on and this new dev in our team saved his commits with, "ok", "done", "fixed", "another one", "arrggghhh!", "wow!"..."not complete"...for fucks sakes...DUDE!

Passed my fucking Type Theory exam!
This course gave me stomach ulcers during the semester but I am done with it finally...
I just wanted to share with someone. :)

Management: "Let's hire some folks and expand the team in this region. And then we will think about what they will exactly do. And then get more work or create more work with our own vision"

Hired developers *mind*: "Why the fuck is this small work done by such a big team? Why the fuck is this work done by a my team (different team) and not by the same team that built the product? Oh, they don't have bandwidth? They want to parallelize? And all decisions still have to go through the product team? They have months of experience and context? Right"

Ok so I have done some work with crypto currency mining pools and recently a client requested for me to make a splash page that showed data from multiple instances of these pools APIs. I went to find some documentation for this open source api and to my surprise there is none. I thought of querying the public API from the clients side and it worked, however it's so slow that the data shows up roughly 20 seconds after the page loads.

Easy fix right? Make a PHP server get the data every 5 seconds, cache it and serve the data with the page and use a websocket for live updates! Until I found out that there is no practical way in this garbage framework to get the damn API data without making an HTTP request or mutilating the original source code. I'm so done with this garbage framework. It literally loads pages based on a page and action parameter on the index.php. I quit.

I fell on the floor with my laptop in the company provided laptop sleeve​ inside a laptop bag. Now it has a ugly bend at the end. Can anything be done about this?

! Rant
So this project manager from a start up contacted me about a few Jobs are they are looking to get done for their app. They asked for cost and I gave them a ballpark range depending upon the type of work. Anyway, after getting a tour of their over engineered app with 128 menu items for a users to go through to get something done, I gave them the hourly rate on the "higher" side of the ballpark which was $5/hr more than lower. Guess what, next I get an email with 4 huge paragraphs, explaining how I am trying to charge them so much extra and is way over the quote. I passed myself laughing and wished him good luck with their start up...

Read online some time ago that "Rust libraries that have not been updated in a bit are not abandoned, they are practically done"

And I find that beautiful, but because I am more commonly associated with rapid breaking bs a-la JS (among other languages) then I do not know if this makes me anxious or paranoid.

Literally slept off during this zoom call. I just woke up I don't wth everyone is talking about. Turns out my PR was up for discussion. Now I have to review a bunch of shit I thought I was done with. OS maintainers can be a pain sometimes 😭

Crawling out of my shell and taking control of my own work. Colleagues were surprised because I'm a very quiet person.

Sales can promise all they want, I decide when we're done. Taking the time to train my peers and learning from them. Communicating with everyone in a way to get things done. Get involved with other departments to see if processes can be optimized. Manage the customer's expectations (under-promise, over-deliver) Taking over this damn company to be more efficient!

When your favorite DJ comes to town but you cannot enjoy him playing live just because you don't have a girl to go with it.

I am done for 2016 already. This is so depressing. Guy J in town.

Man, some days, these fucking managers just make me want to get fucking drunk...

clueless questions, annoying fucking fake priority shit immediately asking for this and that with absolutely no planning or thinking ahead

its really like guiding kids through kindergarten some days

i want to bring some seriousness and structure to this company but some days.... man, i just am done with it

T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM

This is how PHP refers to :: internally, it's the only fucking token with such a weird name, what is this fucking language?

Who is writing this shit? OOP but it's completely optional? Where is the goddamn sheriff? I'm done, off to Ruby, Python, Go or anything that's not fucking PHP. Sick of this shit. Fuck this language.

How can such a massive language be so poorly designed!?

I'm going nuts with this isolation, so next on my agenda... let's learn flutter!

Anyone have some half decent app tuts (preferably not videos) that they can suggest? I'm sure the usual "to do" list has been done and dusted a billion times, I'm looking for something more explorative into different features of flutter rather then just a "build this"

If you are a new employee tasked to work with Java, C#, C++ or whatever, choose a Windows PC. And don't get obsessed with having things that look nice, we all know the screen on apple products is awesome, but to get the job done especially if you are a programmer, it's a pain in the ass.

I see Mac owners daily struggle with this and that just to get some work done.

Of course we can start talking about virtual OS, dual boot and so forth, but does it really matter?

Nonetheless if your job is to build ios apps, then of course a Mac Book is a better alternative, but if most of your work is done with C#, then go with Windows PC because it fully supports Visual Studio.

I hate React. I keep reading that people have problem of grasping it, but that's not the case for me. I get it, I understand it, but I hate with passion HOW it's done knowing how nice it's done elsewhere. What really triggers me is how ugly it looks, both from architecture and code level. To me it really say a lot when even code shown in documentation looks ugly, and while reading it you ask ourself constantly "why it's done this way?". When I read React being called an "elegant" solution something explodes in me. Did you saw Svelte? Vue? Damn, even Alpine.js?
I just cannot how overengineered this API is. Even doing simplest things there produces so much junk code written only because this is what library requires. Why? I feel like working with it is a punishment.
And scalability and maintainability? I've never seen large-scale projects more messed up than those wrote with React. And yes, you can blame teams working on them for lack of skills, but it is the library which encourages or not good practices also, and I've never seen such bad situation with other libraries/frameworks.

ML Dude: “Hey see what I did with this python code. It is so clean and dope”
Business Boss: “Well Done.”
ML Dude: “It is a nice approach don’t you think.”
Business Boss: “How does this put a money in my business account?”
ML Dude: “Ehmmmm”

Had some trouble with the webternets lately.

I am this done with it

So we’ve taken over from a project team that disbanded... read: “cut their contracts because fuck this, I can earn more working for better people”.

Me and one other guy have been tasked with saving this heap of shit.

Obviously the project guys left saying “it’s nearly done, just this one feature”. Because cut contracts are easier to deal with if “everything is almost done”.

We jump on and find that’s not the case at all... this thing, is a beast, a big old stats analysis program... so we’re like “cool, let’s see what’s going o...OH MY GOD”.

The “recalculation” function was core to this POS. The contractors had done it in C# through entity framework... it took 24 hours to run, over a reasonably small data set that was due to double every 2-5 years.

So... here’s the deal, it ran over night.... then failed. And no cunt had noticed. Entity framework “can’t commit because I’m muddled up as fuck, did you really just put the whole db in EF in memory to work with it?” Exception.

Que 6 months of me and my lead doing the job properly.

Anyway, the failure: I ended up in Hospital again with a Crohn’s flare up... about 5 months in.

Fuckall to do with all this nonsense I just wanted to tell a story. it was an interesting/fun project to fix and my lead was a legend... so happy days.

Similar story, different set of contracted devs... they’d been defining requirements with the business users using the term “Risk” which the business users knew as a group of risks.

The domain model had been written RiskGroup<>—

For the people working on small startups:

How do you keep updated on best practices, engineering, and all that when you're 24/7 focused on the startup (implementing, testing, fixing stuff)?

I feel like I love doing things the best way, but we always go with the "do fast, break fast" and it always feels like a mess because the engineering is done after a really small MVP is done (and after a long time usually).

I was hoping to be able to at least do a really small engineering part *before* starting anything new, but CEO always wants stuff done *yesterday*. But for this I think I should be reading more, and playing around with new patterns and all that, so at least I know out of the box what would be a good thing to start with and not having to change the entire project/script from scratch.

Client: I need you to integrate with this API.

Me: ok cool, but what are we doing with it (where does the data go/styling)?

Client: what do think we should do?

Me: well it would be really cool if we did it like this *short and sweet explanation of really cool functionality and design*

Client: I LOVE IT! Let's do it, oh also I need it done by tomorrow...

Me: *GOD DAMNIT, why do you always do this...don't you dare say ok* ok, yeah I can totally do that.

...now at the market stocking up on redbull

I always love to stare the application that I develop... First I start with admiring it... then the things that could have been done to enhance the feature.. then the bugs that could only be seen by me.. then all these results in new update of the application and this cycle continues 😂

Describe one instance when you thought, "Fuck this shit, I'm done with this client". Preferably when the client came up with stupid/impossible requirements

Guess fullstack is now the trending thing. Read a book on javascript and code examples in the book, do same thing with python or any other backend.
As soon as you are done, add fullstack to your bio.

So many newbies following this path. Coding up alot of examples with no real depth in any particular language.

Today I’ve done nothing related to software development or coding.

You can do it too!

This will be my LinkedIn post, of course with a selfie in gym gear✌🏻

If you see my post scrolling, come on bring them thousands of likes😬

Oh boy, a bright new day 🌞.

Will this be a productive day with me getting my tasks done like a functioning member of society,

Or will I drown in my own sorrows and want to spend the whole day in bed.

Let's see what happens.

i am coding blindly cause i am not really sure how the function really works. thats how i get things done after 2 weeks. but at least it works out after a while. buuuut i just want to get this thing done uuuggghhh i need to do this faster!

mind please cooperate with me

So 10 phonecalls en 6 emails later i’m pretty much done with jobhunting for today i think. Omg, what an insane day this was!

Just found this on Reddit
"I used to think that everybody should learn programming. When I first started learning –thinking about how to organize the world in terms of data structures and algorithms– I thought, "Wow, this is such an amazing way to organize information. Everybody should learn to do this!"

I don't think that anymore.

I think there has to be something seriously wrong with you in order to do this work. A normal person, once they’ve looked into the abyss, will say, “I’m done. This is stupid. I’m going to do something else.” But not us, ‘cause there’s something really wrong with us."
Douglas Crockford

Fuck this, I'm done, I'm leaving Facebook. Not messenger tho, all my friends are there (fuck 'em). But when you realize the thing you'll miss the most are meme pages, you can leave with peace of mind.

That feel when you fix your "I want this done by end of day" bugs with 3 minutes to spare.

I had a bug on two animations for 2 months caused by a fucking svg img lazy loaded with no width/height in between png-s on top of the page... This was the biggest blocker on final qa. Im so done with this shit... 😶

Is it common to be handed a code base, be told "that's yours now", and not be told what needs to be done with it? Like not given a spec, not given a list of change/problem reports, just "have this, it's yours, go do stuff, don't break anything"? I am trying to determine if this is a blessing or a curse.

love it when client supports comes to me and tells me the entire conversation they had with a client when i just need wathever request they had. i could have been done with this feature in the time you took giving me 90% useless information.

I work remotely for a team that works together in an office, and this morning on the conference call a team member said

"one thing i think we need to do with this is stay on task, because while these things that have been added are cool we don't need to be doing anything not outlined in the MVC requirements"

Okay first of all -- this is a completely foreign technology to this team. It's not like I diddled around adding fancy animations and no function. The problem working in a new technology with an old mindset is assuming that it's going to move linearly from step 1 to step 2. And that drives me fucking insane.

- Progress in paid contracted work is done by staying on task.

- Progress in research isn't done linearly. You have to try shit -- and figure out what doesn't work.

I feel bad because I'll chime in and shoot down ideas with a fucking guided missile because I know the answer and I've done the fucking research -- I'm not a dick about it, but replying with a simple "no that's not possible, because of this or that", the call becomes silent for 30 seconds because I've shattered their understanding of the technology because nobody has taken the time to understand anything about how this thing works!!

So until they either listen to me, ask me, or learn the smallest amount to get on my fucking level, I'll keep progressing -- because whether the old world idealists like it or not -- that's my job.

Progress.

</ rant>

What the f*** is this gradle in Android Studio??
M getting tired with this error. Whenever m starting studio it stuck on waiting for build to finish project.. I already done with checking offline work still it's not working.. What the f*** should I do with this error??

How do you deal with managers/co-workers asking you the task status every hour? They keep on asking, is this done? is this done? It pisses me off to no end. Does anybody know how to handle this without being overly snarky?

Day 7 of devWholesome...

Happy November guys! It's a new month which means new goals! Set some goals for this month that you want to get done. See how much you get done this month. Mark your calendars for deadlines of things you want to get finished. Don't forget to keep up with the work you already have. Comment below what your goals are this month! And as always make the most of your day!

I've now spent 6 hours trying to find a way to do something similar, as you can do in Neo4j, where you find relations up to depth 5, in PostgreSQL.
The issue is, I have to tables. One with persons, another one with relations (incoming ID and outgoing ID) to have a many to many relationship.

I'm at the point where I just don't care getting it to work. In Neo4j it's a fucking one liner, so why the fuck am I getting assigned to do this in PostgreSQL?
To prove a point? Well fuck you, I'm done with this shit.

So our Chief Test Engineer left the company because of overwhelming frustration and stress. We working on new stuffs so we test our partly done product with partly done test tool developed be another of our team. His successor started to drop most of the 3rd party tools and workflows and documentations to trash expect this one unfinished test software.
Now he wants that we add more features to this software so it can replace everything he trashed already: run tests, generate test reports, generate documentations and so on.
On top of that he organized a workshop to read all this software's source code together, understand how it's works so we can rewrite the whole software from scratch.
WHAT?!

Classmate: I'm done with this

I read his code

Me: Good. But could you make that a little bit more.. readable?

Classmate: Eh..what?

Me: Or use one or two lists less.. and the naming

Classmate: But I need them all!

It's a square around a coordinate within given borders, not rocket science.

Fuck it.

Anyone wanna start a cult?

whenever I think I am almost done with coding something, and go like "yeah, I can totally finish this the next day within just a few hours. Just add 1-2 functions and done" - it ends up being the opposite. I either realize how many things I didn't think and implement through and end up adding lots of things or I come up with a different approach to things which seems better and have to rework half my stuff...
I guess this will get fixed with experience.
Until then, I guess I'll keep trolling myself.

Fuck Airlines man !

I came 6hrs early to the airport as I had to check out from the hotel.
Then this ass airlines delays flight by 2hrs !
Luckily I have my laptop with me on this flight,sorted some work in the first 2 hrs, bt now I am fuckin done!

Aaaah ! Also the airport wifi is so shit,I can even do a google search properly!

With the invention of pip every project done with python just fucken angers me. Like mostly nothing fucken works if there is a single .py file in there. You can put your easy-install.sh up your ass if it just ~tries~ to install shit via pip before because IT WONT WORK FUCK THIS SHIT!

STOP USING PYTHON FOR PROJECTS YOU RELEASE PLS CUS SHITS UNREADABLE AND WONT WORK ON MY MACHINE. MAKE ROOM FOR PROJECTS MANAGED BY NPM OR SHIT LIKE THAT WHERE `npm install` ACTUALLY DOES IT'S JOB THANKS I'M ANGRY AF.

WHAT DOES COLLECTING EVEN MEAN AND WHEN IS IT DONE DUDE?!

"Hey Boss, the things you are asking for will take one year to develop. Replacing the complete UI with another is not an easy task for our software [due to not having MVC or any kind of code modularisation]."

"Yes, but it needs to be done until november"

"We don't even now the requirements, yet. This will force the complete team into weekend and night shifts, to even get a first working prototype done! From my team lead I expect to be defended against such things!"

"Yes, but I need to make money!"

...

My productivity today:

- [11:05] Decided to get something done to be able to enjoy the evening even more (an important deadline draws near).

- [11:06] Ran out of coffee apparently. Well, that sucks.

- [11:25] Trouble with the environment on my machine at home.

- [14:00] Trouble continues, tried using tools to fix trouble, ran into trouble with said tools, ended up fixing trouble with tools before fixing trouble with environment with tools.

- [15:30] Fixed environment, finally ready to get something done.

- [16:30] Spent an hour browsing the web.

- [16:31] Decided this was enough work for a saturday.

Well.

Ok, done with this 200+ property entity... on to the next one!

I've done it! No more secondary projects this time. Whole Christmas spent with family and casual stuff. Have you also succeed?

Why do SAMBA network drives have to suck this much? Yeah I understand that compiling to a network drive is probably a bad idea just for performance reasons alone but can't you at least not fuck with my git repo?

$ git gc
Enumerating objects: 330, done.
Counting objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Delta compression using up to 24 threads
Compressing objects: 100% (165/165), done.
Writing objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Total 330 (delta 177), reused 281 (delta 151), pack-reused 0
error: unable to open .git/objects/7e: Not a directory
error: unable to open .git/objects/7e: Not a directory
fatal: unable to mark recent objects
fatal: failed to run prune

$ git gc
error: unable to open .git/objects/00: Not a directory
fatal: unable to add recent objects
fatal: failed to run repack

$ git gc
Enumerating objects: 330, done.
Counting objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Delta compression using up to 24 threads
Compressing objects: 100% (139/139), done.
Writing objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Total 330 (delta 177), reused 330 (delta 177), pack-reused 0
Removing duplicate objects: 100% (256/256), done.
error: unable to open .git/objects/05: Not a directory
error: unable to open .git/objects/05: Not a directory

You can't have a boss like this: I was assigned to a job that has been delayed for 5 months; It has to be finished by Tuesday. the development team is done with what is necessary, but I don't like this situation

So today morning I got a driver related BSOD after which during restart, my pc went into windows update. Everything was going fine when power failed and it shut off. Now I am stuck with this...
Good thing I have linux in dual boot so work is getting done.

I'm not even done with this code and I am already dreading maintaining it. There is so much magic.

Them: "We need you to do this thing this way because it isn't possible to do the right way."

Me: ... *codes script that works the right way*

Them: "But it was actually this other thing we didn't say anything about that isn't possible."

Me: ... *codes script with new condition, still works*

Now repeat daily for 2 weeks and we may get to where I don't just silently provide a working script.

Maybe I should have just done it the wrong way to begin with?

So we have this new vp guy, and a team in US and another in india

The vp asked me to finish one task by tonight 11pm, and if I need help with the India team's code, call a guy there to help debug

After some debugging with that dev, he replies with:
The code won't work because we haven't implemented it yet

.........

Yo, what the hell is wrong with people

How am I supposed to finish a task that isn't even implemented, and why pushing so much to have it done, wtf I'm so confused with this

Every week a new headache like this, but this was laughable, in two weeks I start a new job 😂

I’m always tired all the time. Depression and what not but today I am TIRED

Had an interview that requires vanilla javascript but I suck at algos even tho I was getting it done till time ran out. We gelled tho so I hope they see potential and move to next round.

But the good news is. I had a follow up interview based on a challenge. It’s the second I’ve ever had and I did well this time.
So much so that they’re booking another interview for tomorrow.
So I’m done with the technical portions of the process.
This is the first time I’ve gotten this far and I’m so happy. I’m hoping really that this is the one cause I doubt I have the energy and will power to keep going though the processes.

I’m so excited. It’s as if all my work is slowly showing and I’m getting closer and closer

Wish me luck guys. Hopefully I ace it as I come across well In General Chats.

This is my last application. If it doesn’t work I think I’m done with dev life and job hunt.

Fingers crossed I’ve found the one

Introducing the new: Sideproject finisher! You asked for it, DevRant, and unlike you - we finished it!

Instructions:
1. Load chamber with single bullet
2. Apply directly to the forehead
3. Commit- something you should have done more of before you came to this

Recommendations for growing a new open source project? I'm all ears if anyone has done or has any thoughts on this as my company just open sourced our Flutter mobile app since it lines up with platform values.

I'm also super excited 😍

SharePoint. Never used it directly but this far every project that the company has done with it results in us having to rewrite it using traditional technologies several months later.

Manager asked me to create a spreadsheet showing tasks in a project with percentage complete to send to client.
Sounds easy, even though I prefer JIRA, I created spreadsheet with all tasks and asked each developer responsible to fill in percentage done.

But I did it completely wrong. I have to give estimate for how long it took for each task and make sure total complete is 70 percent and number of days add up to 10. WTF guess the estimate to match the total. And this is how you teach me project management.

Did I mention that all this is happening after most of the project is done?

Should've posted this on Monday:
Feeling good about myself.
Customer wanted a project prototype done until the 14th of this month. I had it ready and working by the 3rd.

Yippie. I'm apparently competent enough.
I'm gonna ask if I am allowed to put a screenshot with censored names and whatnot on my portfolio.

Although it’s not really a project I will be done with my apprenticeship in july this year and I already have a nice job offer... this feels like a success

I really want to decouple classes from each other, but I also want to decouple them from any specific DI container, so this is what I came up with. Factory methods passed as arguments.
Is this bad? how would it be better done?

Fuck javascript and it's `undefined` property

Lately, I'm pretty much done with EVERYTHING ...

I mean, fuck all this shit, FUCKIT!

When the hardest question on you computer systems test is : draw a house in paint and paint it using only the brush :/.

So so happy i am done with this subject after this semester.

So, this is a story of me leaving my current job. I am in a maintenance PHP project. I usually love PHP but I hate the way this project is done, therefore I hate this project

Now, see the attitude change in people when they come to know I will no longer be there:

> 7:49 AM : *gets a mail without context with some photographs*
> 9:00 AM : *I leave for my doctor's visit which is once in 3 months*
> 10:00 AM: I see, still no email with context, well, I'll go back to sleep
> 12:00 PM: I see, *gets an email from the manager*, so you want this news to be updated with these new images

At this point, I deliberately postponed the task, because I am salty because you are sending images with no context.

> 3:00 PM: Okay, this is done. *send e-mail, WhatsApp, and hangout to the manager that task is done*

> 3:08 PM: Post a rant on devRant!

Fuck can it just be Friday already