By day, I'm a developer.

At night, I'm a father of two awesome kids and a husband to a fantastic wife.

Stop fucking asking me to work after hours! Just because you sacrifice your life to the office doesn't mean we all do.

Being a dev by day and a simracer by night. I made a skin because I wanted to see what devRant would look like on a race car.

CS teacher tip of the day:

server side input checks and sanitization are always useless. because nowdays all browsers have javascript enabled by default and nobody disables it. so client-side checks are safe.

me: ***WTF!?!***

I love starting my day by finding things like this in a production environment...

One day a client sent me gifts and a sweet letter just because they loved their new website so much. I just about cried. I work in an industry where acknowledgment and thankfulness by clients are extremely rare. 😱😭

When i said i'll deliver a feature by end of the day, they thought it after 5. But what i really mean is 11.59pm

Citizens are advised not to cover their Webcams and Mic ports by scotch tape or anything else, as the devices might get heated and may sometimes even burst.

Cooperation is expected from everyone.
Have a nice day :)

Really pissed of by tha Boss!
Working late with the project then next day, the Boss is talkin nonsense.....

When browsing I saw this, quite an ultimate view

I fear the day I'll find my shitty code here, posted by a co-worker.

Portugal is burning
500+ fires active
31 confirmed deads in 1 day...
A large one almost reached my house, saved by two man with construction machines. Still houses burned, gás bottles exploding like shotguns at a distance...
It's the end off the summer...
And now im at work, a new fire started close by...

"Just about every aspect of your every day life is run by or depends on millions of lines of code.. have you hugged a programmer today?"

Hold your keyboard! Hold your mouse!

Sons of Java, of Python, my brothers,

I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me.

A day may come when the sense of programming language fails,

when we forsake our logic

and break all the laws of programming,

but it is not this day.

An hour of headache and shattered monitors,

when the age of Javascript rises,

but it is not this day!

This day we will find solutions on StackOverflow!!

By all that you hold dear on this good code,

I bid you stand,

Developers!!!

HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE!

Just when I thought today was my last day at this job they tell me contract has been extended by another 5 weeks... Fuck yes! :-D

I use GitKraken for managing/pushing to my repos on GitHub. So I always start off the day by saying, "Let's GitKraken"

I'm sorry everybody...

A while back a co-worker of mine fucked up by leaving some debug code and pushing to production.
He quickly repaired it, redeployed and everything was good again before the customer experienced any issues.

Later that day, management showed up by his desk to ask what happened, how it happened and stating that he was not "angry enough" about his fuck up, long after it has been repaired.

Up to this day i regret not asking in what unit of measurement we could determine if we were angry enough; decibels? gray hairs? grams of shit in my underwear?

This made my day so much! (The stickers quality is awesome by the way, much better than I expected)

A different kind of programing...

Made poor commit messages for a repo and then found out that we were going to start doing peer reviews at school the next day and that we were going to be assessed by git commit messages.

Rebased at 2 in the morning. Rewrote every commit message.

Did not get assessed by git message.

It's my first day on devRant. It's been hilarious so far. Everyone seems really cool and interesting.

I'd post a rant but I'm more tired than annoyed by anything right now.

Cheers from Argentina!

This is my colleges server room, it was built by students, for the students. I have attended this college for two years. Every day we here it whirring away. Not one day have I seen one student actually use it.

When I managed to minimize the processing time of the project I'm currently handling. It went down from 30min-1hr to 7min-15mins. The project owner was so happy, said it made his life easier. I was told I did a good job by my manager.

I feel like a real dev then and there. So whenever I'm having a bad day, feeling insecure, I try to remember that day when I was able to do something right. :)

I measure my productivity each day by looking at my battery % when I get off work

I take 1 day off from work, i come back finding my chair replaced by a junky one... I mean really??? f*ck this!

I saw this the other day:

if x % 3 == 0:
print("Number is divisible by 6")

I wanted to, and want to, die.

A common scenario strikes again today:

- Blocked on a problem at the end of the day
- Tell my wife I'm headed home
- Inspiration strikes
- time flies by coding in the zone
- realize I'm super late
- run out the door like a crazy person

Don't be stressed about day-to-day challenges/problems. They'll mean nothing in one year or even one month. But the health damage caused by stress will stay with you.

In our company the estimation is done by customer / PO. Usually, the deadline is set to the day before yesterday after the issue arrived. Always highest prio.

Oh, almost forgot: when a developer does his estimations, the resulting number gets divided by 7 by the PMs. Buffers? Who needs that. QA? Pfff. We are EFFICIENT.
Deadline not met? Bugs in the release? The developer must be bad.

So I've been down recently and unable to find the motivation to code. Today I woke up felt motivated, turned on my Desktop... then got distracted by games and wasted my day. Hope tomorrow goes better.

My perfect plans for the day... Ruined by a bunny...

Eid Mubarak everyone. For those who are not familiar with Eid, we have two Eids in a year, this Eid is called Eid Al fitr, which is the celebration day after 30 days of fasting in Ramadan. In this day everyone celebrates by wearing new dresses and visiting their relatives and friends. Also kids get 'Eidiyah', which could an amount of money or candies.

When you spent the whole day programming in Swift and your mom says that she fucked up her windows 7 machine and you gotta make a clean install (I hate fixing stupid mistakes made by non tech users)

Day 256.

I've tried everything. Going on airplane mode, uninstalling everything but the essentials, blocking all other links on my internet except what I need. I got distracted by the undo feature from my IDE instead. FML.

today morning my boss talking to the designer.

Boss: hey, when we can see the design finished for the web site asked by the client X?

Designer: hmm, about a day and a half, there are many pages and details.

Boss: heheheh, it's impossible, we need it today at the end of the day.

Me insid: wth, then why you ask him about the time like he have a choice..

Ever have this day:

Brain: I'm done for the day.
Me: Why can't I get this logic right?
Brain: I said I'm DONE

*Commence head nod snooze while your boss walks by*

Stop fooling yourself by thinking that the hurry & pressure will eventually go away if you work overtime & stretch yourself to heroics weekly. They won't, and they never will (and even shouldn't). Focus on building sustainable habits that propel you towards your goals day by day, and don't give up until you're where you want to be. Period.

It's all about the little things. Like getting my first cup of coffee of the day while watching all the AWS alarms trigger one by one.

Don't start the day by opening your email inbox. You only will get stress and anxiety!

!rant
Applied for 4~5 internships yesterday, got an answer today for the most interesting one saying that the position is still open, that they are interested by my profile and that they want to meet. That really made my day 👌

ok, these job requirements are getting more ridiculous day by day...

If YouTube thinks that it's going to coerce me into getting a YouTube Red subscription by inserting a commercial in the middle of a video, it doesn't know very much about me!

I have developed a very useful skill after debugging code day after day. It's called, "patience".

On the first day of Christmas, the bossman gave to me: The fact that my new computer purchase order needs to be OKed by the CEO and I need to continue working on a 2014 Mac Mini (i5-4260U, 8 Gig RAM, GPU shot by an ESD on the case long ago) for the next year.
On the second day of Christmas, my family gave to me... a good reason to get shitfaced
On the third day of Christmas, getting shitfaced gave to me: A hangover and some urgent plastic welding job that had to be done with a soldering iron. FML, I've had a headache before breathing in pure hydro-cyano-whatthefuckyougetwhenyoumeltplastics
On the fourth day of Christmas, my team gave to me: A legacy, age-old Rails 2 project that was written by an intern and never reviewed, went to prod in 2014 and can't be changed anymore, but needs to be changed after the fact that it has zero test coverage and needs 100 % now to prevent issues and costly manual testing.
On the fifth day of Christmas, devrant gave to me: The Idea that making fun of Christmas songs to get over the sheer amount of dicks that working over the twelve days of Christmas sucks.

To be continued...

If programmers became musicians we would see
- Wake me up when my build ends, 21 cores, Boulevard of broken CI pipelines by Blue Screen Day
- Smoke from my cabinet by Deep For-Loop
- This is how you debug me by Loopback
- Post-release rhapsody by debug queen
- Another bug in the code by Programmer Floyd
- Smells like bad code by Coders from Botswana
- A place for my code, Cure for the bug by Likin to code at dark

etc etc..

I did an interview with an international company for an "Expert Fullstack Dev." position...

After being praised by the technical team, it turned out that the position was offering a junior salary...

I swear to god...
HR is the cancer of this industry

I lose faith in humanity day by day.

You know, the whole AWS outage being caused by a typo while debugging got me thinking... whoever did that is most probably a developer who had a REALLY bad day. Could that person be on DevRant? Because the story of what the rest of that day and week was like for him or her has the chance to be the most epic rant on here ever. Poor guy/gal.

FUCK capitalist greed! I have befallen to their tricks once again. The daily dosage on my gummy vitamins was three a day but the total gummies in the container wasn't divisible by three so I had to buy three containers and eat one from each per day!

Epic newb here. Like, can-barely-read-HTML new. But I'm curious and interested. I work in an office filled with very skilled developers, and I bring the human component to the operations. Not a day goes by when I don't learn something, or teach something. Sadly, that enriching experience accounts for maybe half an hour of my day. I wish it was more. Anyhoo, rant on, Wayne!

Project day 1. CTO: everything should be covered by automatic tests.

Project day 30. CTO: listen, we have lot of work in the pipeline now and we need to prioritize. Please don't spend that much time on tests.

Project day 100. CTO: why isn't everything covered by automatic tests?

About to be jobless in less than a month because I'm resigning to take a bet on my dreams and skills. Deep down I'm little bit scared as each day goes by.

Looking forward to it.

I'm starting to have some doubts about carrying around a phone in my pocket all day. What if my tender swedish meatballs get cooked by the radiation? Not good.

Hurray! Finally the IOS devRant Supporter subscription link has been approved by Apple and works. I joined at 4 am today. Great way to start the day. Keep up the great work David and Tim.

Why do managers always want to fucking "discuss"? If you had literally a first-grader's education in basic electronics, you could define tasks and tickets by yourself and not have to fumble around all day and fuck it up,

This is the 12th day without internet and my productivity is increased by 100%. I'm impressed.

*Swiches on the PC and opens VS*
Probably I should get some coffee.
*1 hour later, with 0 LOC written*
I should probably code now. Umm, I need music, else I might not focus on the code.
*another hour passes by headbanging to led zeppelin and still on 0 LOC progress*
You know what, this wont work. I should eat and will code with a fresh mind..
*has lunch*
I'll code now.. Maybe I should check up on devrant...
*time goes by with 0 LOC at the end of the day.*
I'll do it tomorrow.
*Next Day, repeats what I did on the earlier day*

Best joke of the day is always reality. Im working in one of the richest companies in the world.
The spare part stock is tracked on an excell sheet and changes in stock filled by hand on paper.

Him: "I don't need source control, it's just another program that does unknown things on my source files. What if one day it stops working?? How do I get my files??"

Me: "you could say the same thing on 90% of the tools you use every day... Like when you restore npm packages by GUI"

him: "what are those? I don't use them"

Also him: "command line is vintage"

A new day, and a new "specification" written by the most unspecific architect ever. I don't understand what you want me to do. Use your words. Be SPECIFIC. As in SPECIFICation. Twat.

If AI steals my job I will overthrow it by making so many new JavaScript Frameworks every day, it will give up and give me my job back.

If you're having a bad day, know that my friend broke my C++ code by replacing one semicolon with a Greek question mark.

I retyped the whole code before he told me. :|

Why is a very productive day generally followed by a completely unproductive one...

I didn't used Windows for a while,
and now I remember why...
that file is a .gitignore.

Windows is getting even worse day by day.

#newlifenewhope -> update no. 0 / Day 0

it's about the end of Day 0, front office is taking shape. the pantry is cleaned.

can't wait to see how my repurposed bunker will look like.

Order and Shipment progress :
- My Server supposed to be arrive tommorow
- Rubber Ducks Package Delivery is accepted by courier
- 2 weeks before my Office Requirements Arrive

Further Update for my Little Office Installment will be tagged as : #newlifenewhope

Stay Tuned !

The function you are about to write is also been written by someone on Stackoverflow. Copy and Paste, lets call it a day.

That strange moment an entire PHP project no longer throws any errors, warnings or notices and you don’t know if you should believe it or not.

It’s been a long day trawling the logs file by file, action by action, surely I’ve missed something or it’s just waiting to break like hell when I commit the changes.

First day at new job. It's literally meeting hell.
1 hour meeting followed by 1.5 hours meeting followed by lunch followed by 2.5 hours meeting.

Couldn't get anything done. About 15 minutes out of all those meetings combined was actually relevant to me.

ok ok I'll move it to inbox Google, you lazy ass company can't you make your won mail service to it by it self -.-
Must admit, those spam emails are getting funnier by the day

I waited 8 years for cyberpunk 2077. I also bought the most expensive pc of my life including 34inch ultra wide monitor.

But at the last moment I got fucked by AMD. The 5900x that I ordered was dead on arrival and went back for replacement. But they don't have any stock to replacement. So I am fucking waiting for cpu. They are not providing any information on the stock.

I am getting depressed day by day.

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter whether you are, or are not, appreciated by your boss or peers. 'git log' tells the truth. The only truth that really matters.

The most unproductive meeting was definitely a day long meeting about “inclusiveness” with an emphasis on toxic masculinity. It was all the dev teams for a whole day which was ballpark 40-60 devs total. Most of us were like, “We have never even had a woman on our teams to alienate.” Eventually a dev hiring manager allowed the three female devs to leave half way through because they were being repeatedly singled out by the HR lady running the meeting.

The rest of us sat through another half day of the HR lady telling us on how bad we are because we are men.

I love Test-Driven Development!

And because of that fact, my heart shatters into thousands of pieces, when I recognize error events on our production nodes which are pointing onto a golden hammer function in a legacy project.

This particular function has about 300 lines with a bunch of subfunction calls and instantiations of helper-classes returning information for workflow.

Refactoring this code to apply proper unit-tests requires a way bigger investment than simply deal with 30 eventlogs a day, because this kind of payment is barely used by customers of our webshop.

This fact is a little itch each day of my work.

Guess it will make me go insane one day
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

xD

Practice "garbage collector": relax by keeping your eyes closed for exactly 10 minutes when you feel tired (you won't fall asleep).

I usually do it once (after lunch) or twice a day (and mid afternoon).

Benefits are huge: just try it.

“The great questions of the day will not be settled by means of speeches and majority decisions... but by iron and blood.” - Otto von Bismarck

Brilliant idea time:

Inspired by @TrojanMorse and his fractal trees

A fractal tree wallpaper that grows throughout the day.

So at 12 a script starts a new fractal and only uses depth 1 (a twig). Then every other hour it branches once more so at 2 am the fractal would have depth 2 and at noon it would have depth 7. That way you get a tree growing throughout the day for your screensaver. Now to make this a thing

When you stand up an entire web application in one day by pulling code from other projects. #winning #miracleworker

First comment by the architects that were reviewing my test, as part of the selection process:

"Well the code was very well documented, not something we see much of..."

Made my day :)

Ever open a mail with a body consisting only of "can you look into this?" before noticing a mail exchange is attached, and in it is a week long discussion about an issue new to you where someone has said on your behalf that it will be fixed by the end of the day?

If I'm lucky I might know if someone - and if so, who - is working (or has worked) on that aspect of the system by the end of the day.

There are no words in any language I know that will sufficiently describe how nonexistent the chances are in any of the infinite amount of parallel alternate universes where I implement and deploy a fix by the end of the day.

But sure, I'll look into it.

Does anyone actually know css off by heart or would your webpage look like diarrhea if stackoverflow was down for the day

Not day passes by that I don't think who the hell thought it would be a good idea to have Ctrl+R shortcut on web version of Outlook for replying to email.. 🙈

Boss: I want Module 4 (regular complexity) done by tomorrow.
Me: *with not enough experience to get it done within a day. Still does it by staying up all night*

Next Day

Boss: I didn't want this, skip rest of the modules and jump to Module 10 (extremely complex) and I want it tomorrow.

Me: ;_;

At the end of each day, work out exactly what you need to do next, and then...

...don't do it. Seriously. Make a note of it, save it, then walk away. Then you know *exactly* what you're getting started with the next day, and by the time you've done that you're in the swing of things. (Especially helpful if you're not a morning person like me. Much, much easier to get started if you know exactly what you're doing.)

Our office has 3 walls made of glass

There are no blinds/curtains/etc

Every day, between about 1pm and 4pm, they Destroyer of Eyeballs hangs in the sky above my monitor, before it finally gets blocked out by another tower block

I now time-track 3hrs less each day - eventually someone will realise that buying blinds is cheaper than paying me to not work 15hrs/week

I'm I the only one who wake's up feeling guilty if a day goes by without coding?

My Daily WFH Routine :

Pretend that you are struggling really hard to solve some issues and it would be done by EOD.

Complete the task before lunch and the rest of the day is all mine :)

It seems female developers are getting scarce by the day... Maybe it's just my region. 🤷🏽‍♂️

CW:"We need this."
ME:"It'll take me some time to do. When do we need it by."
CW:"Yesterday."
ME:"Awesome, that's my favorite day to deliver."

When you've been working on styling most of the day and you later have something you really need to tell a friend and type !important at the end of it by accident 😑

You can tell if you work at a real startup by looking at the coat hanger on the first cold day of the year.

Day 1: depressing
Day 2: blissful

OR

Day 1: blissful
Day 2: depressing

I noticed this pattern to repeat EVERY TIME IN MY LIFE.

When something is extremely good one day, I actually try to reduce the happiness because the depression will kick in the next day twice as much.... So even when i get hit by happy days, i am forcefully trying to become depressed in order to avoid being depressed twice as much tomorrow, CAn you Fucking believe me this ? Hhh
Hhhh

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i

i dont have energy to live

“I’m anti establishment.” - works 4 hours a day on open-source library used by all major banks and never makes a dime from it while probably making them millions. (Way to stick it to the man!)

How do you guys deal with procastination?

I have this thing where I procastinate untill the last day and then I start doing things because I feel more motivated/ working faster, untill then I watch youtube and kill time by other means.

I told Zo I have an exam the next day. Like a normal AI she responded.
Today she messaged by herself (part 2 in comments)

0: Monitors and Graphic's Cards become affordable for us poor graduates

1: Node bloat becomes a thing of the past with WA or has auto-minimize functionality to keep only essential code

2: North American internet companies all go out of business due to free super high speed infrastructure maintained by a trust of communities and elected delegates

not all "dev" related per se, but my current day to day gripes answered

I can troll all day by opening Devtools on a browser and change <input type=“password“> to <input type=“text“> they think i hacked google, facebook and their email acoount

Why tf am I going to college for CS when I'm learning exponentially by the day on my own.

>site is production ready
>client requests new feature by end of week
>add feature and then site breaks on last day of week
>client freaks out even though we warned this is what happens when you add new features DURING LAUNCH WEEK

You asked for it--here it is.

It was a regular day in November--I was taking my dog out for a walk. We were walking past an elementary school when my dog started barking at a rock. I went to have a closer look at the rock when suddenly it vanished into thin air. "How strange" I quietly thought to myself, called out to my dog and carried on walking.

The next day at around the same time, at the very same place--next to the elementary school, my dog started barking at a log which lied in the exact same spot as the rock had occupied the day before. I did the same as I had done a day earlier--walked up to the log to check it out, but it vanished into thin air. We kept on walking.

The third day I decided we'd pick another route. This day, nothing interesting happened.

The fourth day went the same as the third.

The fifth day, went the same as the fourth.

On the sixth day, God was almost done with his works, for that reason we celebrated by going to the movies--me and my dog. To be fair, the only interesting thing that happened on that day was the movie, which was shit.

On the eight day when I got out of my bed I fell, broke my neck and died. And that's when I ate my code to make it shorter.

Just imagine that one day you are evaluated by an AI on how well you can be human.

Day by day I realise that I don't know C

New update is 🔥
This place feels better day by day!

One day the entire 16Gb of my iPhone storage will be filled by updates

I save about 2h commute (so 4h/day) which is nice.

Also not constantly getting interrupted by colleagues

Wasn't even going to do this but here it is.

Meeting to start every single day. Every day I have said what is assigned is not possible in any way. Nobody listens or cares.

Fast forward a week, my team is deadlocked with an issue that cannot be fixed. Morning meeting kicks off, topic gets brought up by me and the immediate response is, "Why have you or anyone else been looking into that? We've known for weeks that is an issue."

My emotional state is deteriorating by the day.
And now of all times my exams are also coming up. Only two weeks, I well get through this

Started my day by running a forkbomb on my own computer to prove to someone what it was 😑Wake me up when it's Saturday.

My boss did not care about making things secure in our early development stage, even though I told him several times.
After 1 day our elastic search cluster was filled with random crappy data.

Fix: Apply security schemes provided by AWS

On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
A drunk who drove into a tree

On the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me

Two shattered skulls
And a drunk who drove into a tree....

Twelve beaten children
Eleven drive-by shootings
Ten frozen homeless
Nine amputations
Eight burn victims
Seven strangled shoppers
Six random knifings
Five suicides
Four beaten wives
Three O.D.'s
Two shattered skulls
And a drunk who drove into a tree

I once had to do instruct some students about doing some project. On the first day, I gave some task and on the next day I checked all of them. Once you write codes for years you can realize what can a newbie write. I asked if he wrote that code by himself. And he was sure of it. But he did not know that that code was taken from my blog.

Worst Monday ever.... going back to work today after a lovely week off. Just checked my emails before I get to the office and I’m already offended by the amount of ‘stupid’ that has happened whilst I’ve been away. Wish me luck, I may have murdered someone by the end of the day!

My productivity reduces by almost half after lunch and reduces to 10% the day I leave headphones at home. It is only after tea break in the afternoon that slowly I start getting back on track again

I'm the only one who after saying "nah, come on, I will backup it tomorrow, what could happen?", spends the day after by reinstalling Windows (after an awesome crash) and praying that the project he was working on for months is still there?

Day 0: thank you for being an Amazon Customer, your database is about to be upgrade in the near future with or without your consent! Tough titties motherfucker!

Day 16: ok, every upgraded by hand in the test environment, everything seems stable, let's go make preparations for production!

Day 16.5: ssh user@<prod_bastion_ip> --yada --yada
Unable to connect

Oooook, let's try again,
Unable to connect

Day 16.5.1: WHY THE FUCK NOT, the IP is fucking right, the cert is right, the user is right, the..... fucking.... EC2 instance has been......... terminated.....

FML!
---

Why! why can't people leave things alone.

Excuse me while I hit the bourbon 🥃

I literally only wrote one line of code today. Don't ever start your day off by saying, "I think I'll make a quick backup of my primary hard drive."

Is it only me who's falling in love with JS day by day. I don't know why people hate JS and find it complicated. May be the NODE development is easier

Devrant is getting more boring day by day. Everytime the same shit. Some people see things that are already rated, and just rerant it. Boring.

Why is java called java?
Because by the end of the day you'll need a strong cup of coffee to retain your will to live.

Had two issues with my new Manjaro installation.

-Fixed DM getting stuck on boot by disabling DM
-Fixed touchpad issue by installing drivers

No fuss. Not much googling. Didn't fuck anything up. No Grub rescue. All my files are still where I left them. WiFi still works. This is a historic day.

Just saved a co-worker by having an installer from 8 months ago in a folder called "desktop", 4 levels deep in folders called "desktop", all on my desktop. My hoarding habits finally saved the day!!!

As we grow up, we feel cooler and smarter and wiser everyday......
Until someday, you start growing old instead, and start feeling stupider and lamer day by day...
You don’t even notice how stealthily this line was crossed....

I estimate by guessing how long it will take me to code then multiply it by 3 and round up to the whole unit.

10-30min work = 1 day
2 day work = 1wk
1wk work = 2-3wks
1month = 3 months

If only I didn't have to deal with other people that take forever....

That and I feel lately whenever my boss ask me for a "quick" change or feature... I literally have to go "down boy down, stop thinking your in a candy store" like he's a little kid.

Another day, another rejection letter . . . 👎

Seriously, there needs to be a job application punch card for developers. I would've earned at least a dozen free interviews by now.

First Post must be seems to be awkward at this place but it is my first post.
"Sometimes inner me says all this coding related stuff might be getting old day by day
//Generally after watching a sci fi hit:/ :) "

Nothing better than ending a day by reading the latest rants

Got appraises on first day of my job by reducing the calls to redis by half.
All I did was replace SET and EXPIRE with SETEX.

I'm going to replace Designer with Architect.

Every single day: WHAT MONKEY DECIDED TO BUILD THIS SYSTEM THAT WE NOW HAVE TO CONTINUE DEVELOPING?

HOW THE FUCK DID HE THINK TO SCALE BY BUILDING A SYSTEM THAT TYING EVERYTHING TO A SINGLE DB?

There should be a show like Masterchef but for programmer. Where the participants build an mvc product based on the challenge of the day for a certain of time, then they got roasted by the juries if it's bad.

Had an interview last week set up by a recruiter. Interview went well, aced the tech part, got on well with the interviewers, etc. They had one more interview the next day and would make the decision. Got feedback from recruiter the next day. I was in the top 2. Was told I had the best experience and skills. Thought I had this. Later that day got told they went with the other candidate because my recruiters presented me for $5000 more than the employer's posted upper limit. The employer just felt my salary requirements would push their budget too much so they went with the cheaper, less qualified candidate.

Not happy with my recruiter at all!

Today marks the day that i finally get to do stuff on a production server.
Its just installing the elasticsearch cluster. But i still feel honored by the trust im given even tho im still an apprentice.

A stressful day trying to untangle some speghetti code I wrote a while back.

On train home. Time to relax

By programming some C code.

Fucking government shifting day light saving time by two weeks making me rely on my phone time zone auto-update and wake up one fucking hour earlier!

Way to go Monday...

Oh yeah am very religious.
I attend the Church of JavaScript.
We code 5 times a day.
And pray on Sundays for Internet Explorer.

By keeping away from bugs and living a functional life
We will all one day meet the web in native paradise

I had a list that was built off a for loop.

One day the list was off by 1, and continued to be for a solid week...

Instead of solving the problem.. Added +1 to the incrementer variable.

Hasn't happened since (3 years)

Pair programming, hands down. I enjoy the hell out of it but it leaves me mentally and emotionally drained by the end of the day. My co-workers echo this sentiment so I know it's not just me.

So today a colleague confessed to an attempt to troll my computer by SSHing into it and playing random songs. Thankfully he did not manage but he would just happen to do it the day we have a security audit.

Windows is more open than commercial Android distributions provided by the major phone manufacturers

Have a nice day ☕

*finally have auto layout working correctly by end of day*

^_^

*open project the following morning and see new auto layout warnings*

0.0

PR by my team leader:
"OH NO! This method is not inline. This will slow our program by 1 ns!!! Fix that immediately!!"
FYI
Our program computes stuff for dozen of minutes, because of his short sight and bad design from day 1...

By taking one 30 minute dump in the toilet per day to relax and read other people's code on my phone

Spent two hours explaining to an intern the basics of version control and why you must always commit and pull before you push. He claims he understood how it worked. I come back the next day only to see my code was overwritten because he pushed and never pulled.. I get yelled at by my boss because he can't see the changes I made and assumes I was slacking off the previous day :/

The day we had to have an app ready for an upcoming demo. Management said everything needed to be done by the end of the day. My change was done, but was dependant on another change being merged first. I had been in the office since 8am. It didnt get merged until 5pm. I was in the office until 8pm trying to fix the insane merge conflicts. In the end i gave up and went home. The next day we discovered that the "deadline" was made up anyway so we still had time. I wanted to flip every single table in that office.

I was a child and I was playing Habbo, I was really addicted to it. A friend of mine in this game said me "why don't we create a fansite?" and I said "ok lol" because I imagined that creating a website would have been funny and easy. So I searched on Google how to create websites, and I discovered HTML. The first version was terrible, but with experience it went better day by day. It lasted 6 years and we had 200 users per day

Kids of the future will one day ask their parents how they met and it's gonna be like this:

Kid: "Mommy how did you and Daddy meet?"

Mom: "We met by bumping into each other while playing Pokemon Go"

1st day of the job tomorrow.

Tried to reset my (broken) sleep pattern by going to bed earlier and getting up at half 5, which is the time I'll need to get up. In typical fashion, I just didn't sleep. I just laid there with my eyes closed. This has happened before, so I know what will happen - no sleep again tomorrow and I start my first day after being awake for ~48hrs...

Fuck you, insomnia.

CSS is utterly retarded but I can’t help but be impressed by how well the DOM still works in this day and age. The fundamental structure hasn’t changed since the 90s.

> be me
> wake up 8:30 am
> sort and view notifications one by one.
> Manager sends text * can you do this? *
> * yes I can *
> goes back to notifications *so where was I? Ah this email.*
> *Please get it done by the end of the day*, another text by the manager.
> I ignore that.
> Manager spams me till I reply
> I hate my life

This made my day: (Translation: In reality the earth is a star with 12 spikes and generated by this css script.

Its an exciting day to continue my Web dev w/ Golang on udemy by Todd McLeod after my two days break.

Spending half the day wondering why the longest javascript calculation in existence is not matching client supplied excel by 0.22 percent.. Realised one number was parseInt'd instead of parseFloat'd... FML

That feel when you fix your "I want this done by end of day" bugs with 3 minutes to spare.

!rant
Just got told that there will be a 5KM run in march by my teacher.
I will either break my foot a day before or simply fucking refuse.

I'm ill enough already.

One day you're looking for a job for almost half a year, and the next you're being called by a company because they stumbled upon your resume (indirect path) ?dafuq? Wel today was that day, i hope I pass the intake though, wish me luck

Trying to perform a "reboot" by not sleeping one night, to force myself to sleep the next night instead of doing the opposite and being drowsy at day every fucking day of the week

thought to start my day by working on my android app

ended up in watching tutorials and other stuff without evening opening android studio

Getting disappointed how ChatGPT is getting neutered day by day. Give me a bot that spouts truth without being censored....

I had a week off. During that time nothing new was pushed to remote by my boss.

On the last day, before I started working again, literally Sunday night, a pile of garbage non-urgent changes were pushed directly to remote.

I guess it wasn't possible to wait another day for a review. I didn't really care much at that point, but it was just another confirmation, that quitting is the right thing to do.

With 182 compile errors management wants the new build out by Monday morning but neglect to say this until end of day Saturday. They also knew for a week or better that they were going to enforce the deadline on each team.

Dear recruiters, if you prefer telephone calls, why not also learn how to leave a message on a voicebox, display a caller ID, and list your phone number on some legit page on the internet?

Otherwise you'll leave the impression of a desperate outbound call center agent paid not by leads and conversions but just by the quantity of calls made during the day. If I had such a job, I'd also call voiceboxes and busy developers all day and get money for listening to signals tones before hanging up.

Project deadline got preponed by 3 weeks. What a lovely day tis is!

I would not consider myself an overachiever by any means, but I must say, I'm quite satisfied with my contributions this year at the new (relatively speaking) job. I got to go back to writing code almost every day, all day, and that sure as hell beats being in meetings all the goddamn time.

Spent the whole day trying to refactor a program that consumes an API and didn’t work out. Now we have one less day to try to improve the product.

I think the fault was that we were aiming too high by looking at other libraries and we ended up over-complicating it.

Positively accepting criticism is a superpower I hope to acquire one day. As in jump in joy and violently smile when they say my code is shit level of positive acceptance.

I don't really hate or reject criticism. I am simply saddened by it, on a good day.

so yes, if you have this superpower, where's the source?

So what do you call it when you get bombarded by emails saying your servers are at 100% CPU, but once you fire up the monitoring tools everything is back to normal?

FUCK YOU AMAZON IT'S MY DAY OFF.

Day by day linux distros are increasing..! I'm trying one distro per week (you can call it as weekend timepass ).. ;-)

I'm just sitting here watching you people get destroyed by your windows OS day in day out.
Should I have empathy?

My plan for the morning: 2 hours getting poked by doctors. How's your day going?

Spent the day working on a concept for a Survival, Twin Stick Shooter, Tower Defence game. not sure if it will work yet, but everyone I have ran my Concept by really likes it.

(Day 1 of Database Class)
Database Prof - "Your final project is a program or app that deals with big data and showcases data analysis. Make something that can be used by consumers and has real-world application."

(After the Day of Showcasing Projects)
Database Prof -
(What he should have said on Day 1) - "Make something that makes me laugh with added data."

Working from home once a week, it's my most productive workday by far. No annoying interruptions; well except for my cat who insists on being in my face all day (but honestly, I can live with that).

I usually avoid procrastination by turning off my phone, not going on social networks or YouTube and by setting some goals to achieve in a day.

After a wildly productive day yesterday, I've spent most of today staring at my screen, going down mental rabbit holes. Sod's law!

It's not helped by an accidental all-nighter last night - I'm too old for that shit these days

My motivation disappears day by day more when wfh. Always sitting in the same flat drives me crazy and I'm missing socializing (as a person more on the introvert side).

Who among you devs ends up coding with 4 or maybe 5 different languages in one day !!! And by languages I mean C++, Python, JavaScript and Java for Android.

Thinking of writing new books

"How to become obese in a week?"

And

"Race between your code and yourself. Who explodes first!"

I bond socially by telling programmer jokes.

Day 10: I start being weirdly glazed at when I come across colleagues :D and people cross the street when they see me

#success

I'm on leave but my brain won't stop thinking about ways to refactor that one js module I was working on yesterday into a functional one.

The fuck, brain?? I'm doing you a favor here by letting you take a day off!

Friday: Expectations vs Reality

Expectation: Work on work for half the day then work on side projects for the rest of the day. Consider it a good day.

Reality: Work on work for whole day. Then have your boss set the expectation to have a project completed by Monday morning that you know will take 3 more days. Hence making you work the weekend to try to get it done in time. -.-

Every day: 30 mins trying to remember where I left off the day before. Coding for 5 mins. Interrupted by a colleague. 30 mins trying to remember where I was. And that's my day.

A good day at work and I have a few questions about the green light to the meeting tonight but I will be back to normal in 30 of the day and I have been talking to him about refund my money laundering problems (everything was written by the keyboard autocomplete) 🤔

On day one was told "don't check in anything that will break the build." Been debugging and had to revert back a few days only to find my clean area is broken by some else's commit.

Our Support Team is currently processing your inquiry. We'll contact you within 1 business day.

23 hours later:
Is it still not working, or the problem was fixed by itself?

I want to change my domain name by moving the actual website files to a new domain. It has 4 articles and has about 700 page views per day. Will search engines blacklist the new site for 'copied' content?

The error in database entry was negated by a bug in front-end code. Two mistakes cancelling out each other!

How is your day going ?

I just had the first day of my new job, and I started it by putting my victoriously earned devrant stress ball on my desk. I waited a word about it the entire day... I guess imma have to introduce my coworkers to the awesome place devrant is 😁

Elon musk shocks the world by putting a new headquarters on Alcatraz Island. It goes right along with his 12 hours a day 7 day a week hardcore workforce.

Another bad day improved by a devRant gift, it's the second time that this happens. Do you want make me smile guys? :3

I once managed to replicate data from a scientific paper by writing a C++ program, at the first try. I still can't believe it to this day.

On the day nyc is eclipsed by a large mushroom shaped cloud the gods will smile

Doing like Penelope, adding crazy features commissioned by our boss and removing them the day after 'cause they're useless and "that's not what the client wants". Boss, let us finish this fucking shroud, so that we can bury you with it!!

Does anybody else feels like scrum's daily is utterly useless when working day by day on site?

I mean, we talk to each other either way, all day long. Scrum acting like this is the 15 min of whole day we will have the chance to speak...

Bug report : date_created is wrong by one day, but only in the afternoon. Gaaah ! Why did nobody save the user's offset...
Or better yet just normalize to UTC!?!?

One week ago I've made a work plane to divide features development day by day, obviously procrastinating
This morning I realized the project release was today
I made an entire mobile app with a plethora of features without bugs in an afternoon.
Never worked so hard in a so limited time without problems.
Loved it.

My day today? Fixing bugs caused by the Change to the Summer time here in Germany.
Congratulations. #nice

wait,
if there are 3.4 Billions FaceBook fake users, that means than there are also at least 3.4 Billions fake email accounts around. Jeez.

And the spam traffic estimates are at 260Billions email per day or 260B/3.4B=76 emails sent by each fake email accounts per day. Much less as probably fake email accounts are more.

So, only 76 spam emails sent per account per day. I think there is still room for a big improvement

A typical (Covid) day (for me) being self employed. I tend to start working at around 8am, only break to make coffee, and by 3:30 in the afternoon I fall asleep til 5pm. Then I get some food, play my bass, mess around in garage band, drink a bottle of wine, watch some crap movie, go to bed around 1:00am rinse and repeat. I never work weekends anymore. Interested to know your Covid day,.

How do I get through tough dev days ?

If by tough day we mean a day where I'm really not feeling it or the like, I don't.
I let it pass by me though music or doing something I enjoy doing, or something random but interesting.

If we mean that the task at hand during that day is tough, then there's no escaping it unless you want to risk losing your job, and I can't afford losing my job. So I ask for help, try to do it one little thing at a time. little progress is better than no progress.

Yeah..finally some improvement.

my code is throwing Internal Server error exception now, two days back it was showing Unknown Exception.

Improving day by day.