FUCKING HELL! I JUST WANNA STAY HOME AND CODE! NO I DONT WANNA WATCH THAT SHITTY MOVIE AGAIN! NO I DONT WANNA GO DRINKING WITH YOU AND LISTEN TO YOUR LUDICROUS BRAGGING! NO I FUCKING DONT WANT TO MEET YOUR COOL FRIENDS WITH FACEBOOK PHOTOGRAPHY PAGES! NO I DONT WANT TO GET A NEW LIFE, CODE IS MY ART AND ALL I WANT IS TO STAY AND PRACTICE IT TILL MY EYES GO DRY AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS I'LL CODE IN FUCKING BRAILLE!

So i was playing around with terminal apps in node.js a few weeks ago and made a CLI version of devrant. Images get converted to ascii just for fun. This is about was far as it goes for me though - anyone want to take it over? (The code is shit - this was a midnight proof of concept). Currently there's pretty much just the rant listings, the login works too but I think @dfox would need to approve it's use.

Next script I'm writing is going to be a terminal rant posting tool so I can rant from my server 😉

$ rant -m "fml" -f ~/screenshot.jpg -t "lol"

One of my worst meetings, as the sheer rage was unbelievable.

Backstory:
Architect: "Stop duplicating code", "stop copy pasting code", "We need to reuse code more", "We need to look at a new pattern for unit tests" etc.

Meeting:
Architect: What did you want to talk about?

Me: I built a really simple lightweight library to solve a lot of our problems. Its built to make unit testing our code much easier, devs only need to change a small bit of how they work.

Architect: I like the pattern a lot, looks great ... but why a library? can we not just copy the code from project to project?

... do you have a twin or something?

*On a programming support forum*

Guy: My compiler keeps throwing null pointer exception at line 128.
Me: Ok. Can you post your code real quick so I could figure out what is null at line 128?
Guy: No I'm not going to show my code to someone on the internet. What if you want to steal my code?
My mind: "Dude wtf why would I steal someone's code on a support forum?"
Me: *Use the next 15 minutes explaining that showing the code is necessary so that others can actually help him, and that no one on a support forum is going to steal his code.*
Guy: "You know what I'm more convinced that you want to copy my code. I might as well just try to fix this on my own."

What?

Is this the code life
Another scrum meeting
Caught in the the Node life
No escape from reality
Open your eyes
Look up to the screens and see..
I'm just a dev boy
Doing some debugging
Because there's warnings here
Errors there
Segment faults
Everywhere
Anytime you distract
Takes another hour from me
From me

*piano starts

Mama. Just committed a bug
Merge the branch to production
Did it fast for milestones
Mama. The repo has just begun
But now they going to throw the stack away.
Mama. U u u uu
Didn't mean to code in LAMP
But it's the only stack i know how to setup
In Ubuntu. Without docker
I really don't get vagrant

*piano

It's too late
My team is done
Some dev is working in Nepal
A UX dev. Now what is that?
Goodbye everybody
I've got to go
Gotta leave this lame meeting
And face the truth
Oh nooooo. I i interns
(they have questions)
I want to debug
I don't want to stay till 3 in the morning

*epic guitar

I see a litlle dev over there
Let's code review, let's code review
Did he do the last commit?
Coding in the white board
Very very frightening me
That's bug(that's a bug)
That's a bug (that's a bug)
What the f*ck did you do that?
Magnificcooooooo

I was just coding and nobody liked it
He was coding and nobody liked it, spare his some time to do his debugging

Easy man. Here go. Will you let me code?
A meeting. No,we will not let you code. ( let me code)
A meeting. we will not let you code. ( let me code)
A meeting. we will not let you code. ( let me code)
We will not let you code
Never never let you go
Never let you code, oh
No no no no no no no
Oh mama mia, mama mia ( dude, you've gotta let me code)
Screw you guys, I'm gonna code and commit. Commit. Comiiiiitt!

*epic guitar

So you think you can review me and spit in my eye?
So you think you can dump me and erase my branch?
Oh baby, cant do this to me baby
I've just have to log out.
I've just have to log outta here

*epic guitar solo

Nothing really matters
The users will not care
Nothing really matters
To them

Any way this code blows

"Sure ill join the meeting it's not like I'm busy with the project's deadline being this Friday and all"
My notes from the meeting:

So i can listen in on calls for my training.

I felt so sorry for a colleague when he spend nearly half an hour explaining that we only HOST someone's site and are NOT responsible for the code. (just for the record, he explained it in 15 different ways so anyone (nearly) would've understood but it seemed like the person in the phone just didn't want to hear it).

Poor guy (my collegue) 😞

I am done with people, I just want one single room, with good internet, dual monitor setup... And I can spend my whole life like that... Being social, fuck that shit... I have devRant for that... and rest, I just want to code, listen to music, drink coffee and sleep like hell...

Why is it that I can understand some other dev's code faster that understanding someone's feelings. Why is it that I am good with principles of Programming Languages, but not the basic Principles of Humanity... Yes, I agree I don't have feelings, but is it wrong not to have feelings, I am a dev, I am supposed to be good with Codes, not humans... I want to be in my small space of close people. (My family), and that's it... I am no good with others. I hate Facebook, but love devRant, I spend more time on StackOverflow than that on WhatsApp. Why is it so... Why

I don't know.. I mean I'm spending so much time developing what I'm developing but.. In a couple of years, maybe the dependencies I'm using will be updated and my program will become obsolete.. what if the whole framework on which my application is based upgrades.. I don't want to have to rewrite code again because it's just too much work..

I think we need to figure out ways to future proof stuff.. like a decade into the future or so.. We shouldn't have to support prehistoric code..

Look... I know I'm just a newbie. I started a year ago as a junior. Sure. No one wants to do code review, so I got chosen to do it. People don't like it when their code gets criticised. And you know what? I get it, I should probably be a bit nicer with my comments. I should not suggest I'll make a fork and split internal library into two streams if things continue this way. I should not ask questions that can be understood as me being passive-aggressive.

But holy fucking shit, you're a senior developer. Don't treat Java as a fucking scripting language. Don't have a method that has 600 lines of code, because you're repeating the code! You've already copy pasted this shit, and modified it slightly. Like, couldn't you have created some architecture around the code? How can a senior dev copy-paste code?

Oh and why the fuck did you create a new utility class for functionality I already provide? Look, I admit, yours is a lot better, ok? It has extra functionality. But why the fuck didn't you enhance my utility class? Why did you create a new one? Did you just not want to touch my code, or did you not see it right below your newly created class?

Am I the only one who fucking cares about maintainable code in this company? When I got hired, I was in tears by how frustrating a lot of the things were. No documentation anywhere, not even fucking comments. No processes in place. Want to do something? Source code is your documentation. Fuck you! I busted my ass of to force everyone to document every little bullshit, to re-factor their MRs that I reviewed, and I won't let even a senior fucking dev pollute the code base!

Fuuuuuck... Me...

Pointy Haired Boss: "There's an issue with this simple bit of that service, could you take a look?"
Me: "Sure, give me a minute to investigate"
*A minute later*
Me: "No wonder there's a problem, this code is horrendous! What idiot wrote this unmaintainable crap?"
PHB: "Doesn't matter, just fix it, test it and release it."
Me: "I just want to check who did it, so they never touch our code again."
*Checks SVN log*
Me: "Well, I guess I can never touch our code again."

I need more dev friends... currently drinking a beer alone. Not that I am alone but I am unable to engage in normal conversation at the moment. Just finished a 7 hour coding binge where I developed a solution which I am very proud of and which results in weeks of development time saved for the company which results in more time for proper refactorimg and Magic tournaments. I just want to sit down with a friend, show my code, ask for improvements and reason the chosen solution. And drink beer.

I think programming is definitely an art. The biggest difference between programming and other artforms like painting is that you don't want the people who look at your code to wonder what you meant with it. Just my 2 cents.

I was fired from a job where the boss had it in for me. He was a really experienced dev, but he was also very arrogant. He hated me questioning him. I didn't have the evidence nor the "political" clout to back up my criticisms.

It was humbling.

I realised two things:

keeping your mouth shut is often the best approach.

And

my own arrogance was keeping me from getting better, from learning new things. Not just for the company, but for myself.

I want to write better code, make better design decisions, utilise design patterns, actually think about what I'm doing, and be able to justify why I'm doing it.

I want to be able to choose the best tools for the job, not the best tools for me.

I want to be a person that is open to criticisms and I want to be someone who is always ready to learn new things.

You know the story about Battlefront 2? How long it takes to farm points to unlock those cool characters like Darth Vader etc? Yeah, it takes some time. Time that I necessarily don’t want to spend on mindless playing. I thought I’d try to beat the system by building this thing that would play the game for me by moving and jumping every few seconds.

I already have the code ready and now I just need to build the physical thing that will actually interact with the controller.

I am using an Arduino Uno with two micro servos.

Honestly I just want to see if I could build it, I’m not sure I will actually use it (you barely get any points if you’re not killing people anyway).

I’ll keep you posted with the result!

Wait! I screenshot this from the advert of a company who advertises code academy.

Does this mean they want to train people on how to edit minified codes? 🙄

Cos it looks like this guy just opened jquery.min.js and took a picture.

I can't help it. 💔😂😂😂

Me: I have an input stream!
Library: I want a file.
Me: I can see your code, you will convert it to an input stream! Don't any of your constructors take an input stream?
Library: No. I want a file. Okay, you can also include an encoding.
Me: I don't care about encoding.
Library: Fine, just give me the file then.
Me: You mean I have to somehow convert my input stream into an actual file so I can give it to you?
Library: You're gradually catching on, yes.
Me: Can I add a new constructor myself that takes an input stream?
Library: Sure! Good luck in getting it approved by the maintainers and the new jar distributed everywhere, including Maven Central before your deadline.
Me: Fine, I'll just rearchitect everything so I can give you an actual file.
Library: And then everything will be fine.
Me:

"So you need access to the test server?"
Me:"Yes"
"Please fill these 800000000 forms,sign here,get your blood sample,your ID ,your right kidney,letter of approval from your boss,...."

Fuuuuuuuck!!!! I just want to change only 3 lines of code!!!!!!

My anxiety is kicking in again.

I want to build something meaningful outside of work but my mind is blank, I have no ideas to implement, and whenever one pops up in my head, I DDG it, I find that there's someone who already built something similar and I lose all interest.
I want to code, but I'm tired of solving fictional problems.
I miss being excited to learn a new tech, since I know I would ditch it if I can't find anything to build with it.

This is causing me to lose all motivation to code and learn, I really hope this is just a phase ｡ﾟ･（>﹏<）･ﾟ｡

Client: I saw this feature on a site and I want it on mine.

Me: I’m almost done with the project. You can’t possibly expect me to start adding new features now.

Client: Just go online and copy the code. I won’t take that long. It shouldn’t be difficult if you’re a professional.

WTF is wrong with people. The worlds gone to shit. Who does he think he is?

Him: You can code, right?
Me: Of course,why
Him: I want to start promoting my (very crappy) music, I need you to –
Me: No!
Him: But, I just –
Me: I already said No.Never gonna happen.
Him: I get it.You really can't code,you just pretend to.A simple website can't be that hard for you if you knew.
Me:(Pushing him out) Nice try.

As devs we like to complain about our jobs. But I just want to take a moment and acknowledge how truly amazing writing software is. Nothing else has given me so much joy and happiness. The endless stream of new things to learn, the elusive art of clean code, and deep understanding of systems required for architecture. There is so much depth to this career we have all chosen and I hope you guys love it just as much as I do.

Published a well documented and tested API with project examples for basic use cases

- "Yeah we didn't use yours because we didn't know how to use it"
- "Did you look at the documentation or code examples?"
- "What where?"
- "In the repo you just cloned"
- "Yeah no <random guy> found a hacky way of doing what we want, his thing just works"
- "I..."

Me in 2018 : I'll code xLearno.com all on my own!
.
.
.
Me in 2019 : xLearno.com is a team of 5 🎉
.
.
.
Just a quick lesson that I learned in my entrepreneurship career, "You want to go fast, go alone! You want to go far, go together 😍"

"The customers of our webshop are able to change their billing address... We don't want our customers to be able to do that."

(in a few months with the new general European data protection regulation I need to code it in again, so I just removed the html...)

Today I'm going to work on my side project that I haven't touched in weeks.

I want to utilize Angular 2 which means I'll need to learn TypeScript. I also want to use the new .Net Core and EF Core 1.0. Oh and I want to handle authentication using JWT!

Wow, that's gonna be a lot of effort to get things off the ground... maybe instead I'll use this time to learn some new concepts. Maybe watch this episode of Fun Fun Function, or maybe this video on writing Assembly code for an app on Raspberry Pi, that sounds cool!

Actually, you know I should really teach myself dependency injection and unit testing for once. I'm so behind the times.

Well, really I should finish this book on design patterns first. Ok, where did I leave off? Page 20 I think... ehh... maybe I'll just work on my side project.

Tomorrow... tomorrow, I'll work on my side project.

New semester, new problems....

Just started my 6th semester at uni and my teammates are already proving to be serious dumbfucks..

They want to keep all files neat and organized, sure, fine, good idea.
They want to use Dropbox to store code and our LaTeX report, no, never! Somehow managed to get them to switch to GitHub, yay!
They want to have everything in one fucking repo! Why? Oh god, why? And I can't change their mind on this!
And they still want to use Dropbox to have a backup and sync between their machines...

So during this semester, we will store our LaTeX report and the, at minimum, 3 code projects, in the same repo organized by folder!
Why not one project, one repo? Then I won't have to pull all the shit code that I don't have to work with!

Expect more rants in the coming months...

"Don't reinvent the wheel..." - I read it often, still I hate to use foreign code. It's not only that I do it for learning purposes. I just don't trust them. I want to keep the control, I want to understand my application and I want to be to blame when things fuck up.
I would probably through my laptop if my website gets hacked because of some fucking plugin or code I found somewhere on the internet.

So yes, I will invent the wheel new. At least I will spent some time to understand how this particular wheel is made, how it rolls and how I can improve it for my specific situation.

Sometimes my tires have some uncommon profile, but they fit to the stuff they are made for.

Man it's midnight and all I want to do is work. 5 hours from now I'll be dragging out of bed to go to work where nothing gets accomplished. In 17 hours when I drag in from work I can do real work for 7 hours before crashing while wishing I could just code through the night. It's an infinite loop and I dont know how to fix it!

1. Comes up with a project idea.
2. Doesn't have enough friends who code to collaborate said idea with.

3. Abadons project.

All in that order. lol
I just want to build cool stuff. :(

I'm so weary of JS right now but every time i want to code something in another language i just think:
"Why don't i just do this in JS. Would be much easier."

Please help me.

Refactoring code of somebody who left and:

- Plagued the code with TYPOS (milions of them but ok I can live with those... to a certain point)
- Used global variables by default.... of course even where they're not needed
- Used comments only in parts of code where... well they're not needed, important ones are of course left out
- Did not indent code. 3..2..1... Did not FUCKING indent code properly and when he did... did WRONG!
- Instead of indentation he used commented line with multiple ==== signes.... so far top is 60 consecutive lines with olny ==== again no apparent pattern here
- Did not follow a fucking standard in variable naming... no camle casing... there are varaibles assigned multiple times to "temp" variables without no reason just for the sake of wasting resources on the system I guess

This is just the beginning of the review but I already want to change job, die, scream, cry... not in any specific order.

Holy shit I never realised how frustrating it is to code for a client the way they want it... I mean I just want to go back to coding for fun

Night at my girlfriend family... to celebrate both her and her sister birthday...

Offensive comments, jokes and pure irrespect about being a dev, having a beard and being quiet, from the guests.

Her actual family is really nice.

I swear... if I hear one more joke about my beard!

The only interesting person, her aunt, just left...

Back to stupid jokes and fake laughs.

Every time I have to deal with my boss code and lack of convention and everything that makes a clean code I just want to scream like a bitch and punch him in the face without minding breaking my own hand.

I wonder if I'm getting tired of making websites for people. I just "fired" two longtime clients today without really caring all that much. Not for no reason. They just were asking too much for too little. And I was getting bored of them. When I think about what I want to do in my spare time, the first thing I think about is creative writing. The last thing I think about is code and website design. It didn't used to be this way.

Oauth2 examples.

Seriously all examples I found use library that use library that use library to just build url encoded parameters like this

client_secret=foo&code=bar

Got me 5 hours to dig going trough couple of github repos with implementation to see that shit at the end.

Seriously people !!!
Start thinking before you write single line.
I don’t want to download 10 dependencies and 100MB+ just to send 2 requests with url encoded parameters.

It’s in every - literally every language.

I know you’re stupid but please just try to understand how things work instead of copy paste another stackoverflow and medium snippet.

How intellij handles syntax errors while reformating code vs eclipse:

Intellij: I'm not sure what you want to do there, so I'll just make slight adjustments.

Eclipse: Yeah, I don't understand this so fuck your whole file.

Guys guys guys. Conversation had right just now. A PM from the company I’m freelancing for just said

“We need to move away from SQL server and shift all the data to MongoDB. I don’t want it to take more than a month tops”

Verbatim. No context. Nothing. The website is for a small time supply chain software that’s been chugging along for a decade now with spaghetti code everywhere.

How do I even respond? The other guy who works with me sent 😂😂😂 to me privately and now is offline lol wtf

Well, it finally happened.

After 25 years coding in all types of languages and environments, I’m no longer having fun.

It now seems like it’s a fight to get interested in the code. I used to be something that I would spend hours / days doing. Now I just want to walk away from the code.

Is it true (do you think) that after a while all you see is a for loop, an if statement, a null check and you just think to yourself. Fuck this! Because I think I’m there.

God it’s depressing to think that I no longer find it fun.

Me : I should start building user authentication system.
inner self : there are enough free and secure ones out there, just go read the documentation.
Me : fuck I'm not reading 10000 pages of documentation written in alien language.
inner self : well then you better start building
Me : **writes code
Inner self : you better add the data validation and security while coding
Me : I just want it to work !
Me after a few days trying not to suicide : the site is hacked, the code is bugged, hello darkness my friend

!rant
I would like to ask you guys for advice.

I am a content manager who is gradually given more and more dev tasks. That is great because I want to become a webdev. However I have one big issue. Whenever I write code (any code) I feel ashamed because I know that anyone else could do better. I am also ashamed to show my work to my colleagues because I am afraid of what they might think of me. I know that they are good people and they would probably help me out but still...

Someone once tried to explain to me that I am not my code and whenever my code is being evaluated I am not the one who is being judged, it is my code, my current knowledge. I understand conceptually what he was trying to tell me but I just can't feel it.

Did you have similar feelings when you started out?
Thanks in advance.

I still don't understand the effect devRant has had on me...

When I first joined I was quite happy just being my old 2D game developer self but now all I want to do is build CLI tools, interpreters, root through source code I don't understand and not shut up about arch... Not sure of I'm down the right track or not now

Fuck regex and everyone who has ever endorsed the use of and/or is affiliated with regex.
It's unreadable, impractical, overly complex and complicated and it adds unnecessary clutter to your code, and your thought process.
It's 00:50 am and I just spent 3 hours debugging a regex only to realise forgot a single "?" in a 75+ character long string and I want to go to bed.

Does anyone else get this super lazy feeling where you want to write code but you don't wanna have to actually type it? Like I'm here in bed thinking about my projects but I don't wanna grab my laptop and get to work I just wanna think my code into existence.

Isn't it lovely when someone wants feature X and Y and one is five minutes (and mostly CSS) and the other one is hundreds of hours of backend code.

"I don't want to know, just make it happen. Jeez how hard can it be, it's just a new button"

Reasons 1 and 2 arent that important to me. The main reason I code is #3.

1) Brain exercise. I always feel sharp after a coding session, even if it ended in disaster.
2) Lots to do! There's never a full day in code. Make your own universe, if you so desire.
3) Pride. I have a pride problem. I never felt proud of myself no matter what I do. I graduated with a melancholy feeling, same deal when getting my license, same deal when passing a test (God, glad that's over!)... But code makes me proud. I love what I make. I want to show everyone. I want to show it to everyone before it's even finished because I just can't wait. I want everyone to use it and to love it. Because I sure do, and it's the best thing ever.

I could make a viral video, produce a triple platinum record, or build a billion dollar business and still not feel the same level of genuine satisfaction and happiness that I may get from writing good code.

It always keeps me coming back.

How to teach a 5 yr child to code?

The method is simple you don't need to teach him to code just help him to understand the method to execute a task. It took me years to understand that coding is a way to express what you want to say- the method and also is our expression. So, if you can help him/her to understand what to express, then I believe the method on how to express is totally unworthy. He/she can say printf("I know this") or print("I know this") or #I know this or he/she may create a new language.
Which you might call: The Baby's Code in future

If you like it do ++

IntelliJ has this tutorial where it teaches you a bunch of shortcuts for making life easy, since version 2017.3 or something like that. Most of it is pretty meh, some of it is pretty useful. And I just came across a keybind to auto format code.

What else do I need. If I can quickly format my code and make it look pretty, that's all I'd want.

"Try reformatting the selected code with Ctrl+Alt+L"

*Linux Mint goes to lock screen*

*logs back in, code is unchanged*

Well played...

Help?

I work in support and some of the developers here don't seem to realize that their customers can't use the app they wrote because of all the bugs, but they freak out if anyone so much as *thinks* there's a problem with the code.

We have evidence it's their code. How do I get them to see I'm not saying their code sucks, just that a few changes might help performance?

I don't want to insult them, but at the same time, they're only responsible for one application...

Just woke up and all I want to do code, but I have family over...

Hello World! First post here. I'm literally done with frontend stuff. I want to design code, not to code design. Unless it's Processing. I find it cute. So.. I have a somewhat handy grasp on C++ because of a class in electronics course, Python seems quite easy to catch. I'm totally new to programming. I'd like to get into software, game development and android development (but I would like to do things cross-platform).
Which paths, resources, languages, useful books, videos, or just anything would you recommend?

To be fair, I have no coding friends so mentorship or simply finding code buddies would be great. 💜

PHP is my main language, but I haven't had a single problem with it yet.

Nodejs it is.

How can you possibly make it SO GODDAMN HARD to just implement ANYTHING synchronous. THERE ARE REALLY FUCKING GOOD REASONS YOU *WANT* YOUR CODE TO STOP EXECUTION WHILE DOING SOMETHING

EVER HEARD OF HARDWARE PROGRAMMING? YEAH, APPARENTLY NOT

GRAAAAH

Worst part of being a dev?

For me it's putting myself into infinite loops wrestling with my own self doubt. Is this really how I want to solve this problem? Could this code be cleaner? Surely there's a better way to do this? Am I adding unnecessary complexity? Is this going to come back and bite me in x months? And so on...

In fact, most days I just feel like an imposter.

Has anyone completely lost their motivation to code but got it back after changing jobs?

After 12 years of mostly web development I really don’t want to do it anymore. I’m sick of the crappy half arsed wire frames, lack of decent requirements and expectation that I’ll just magically know what the client wants. I’m sick of ancient tech stacks and being expected just to know how to make it all work, with no documentation, code comments and monolithic code.

I’m basically sick of all the bullshit.

My current and last company had these issues.

So I’m looking for a new job but I’m being fussy about it. I’m trying to learn new stuff but it’s really a struggle. I used to be good at this!!

I don't understand why you keep pushing me into your team. You have literally moved issues to the next sprint just so they would welcome me when I come back. I already pushed the code, what else do you want? Do I remind you of your mother? Did she not love you and now you're seeking affection from me or some fucked up shit I don't understand?

You want me to do all these and the whole time, your jerk ass developer does nothing but insult me.

"Why don't you know that this code is in this repository in this other branch?" (Multiple repos, different branches, and the most updated one is never in anywhere that makes sense.)

"Your code is inefficient. We have helpers for this part and you did not use it." (Literally no docs or comments plus blank readme file.)

"We had to refactor your code big time because you weren't following our standards." (What standards?)

Like what the fuck? I'm not a part of your team and no one briefed me as to where all this shit is. Somehow I'm supposed to just know? It's a fucking miracle that I even finished anything. Your dev can't even setup the local environment himself, I did, and that's probably the only reason you want me to do this.

What is your point, man? If it would be more efficient for your team to do it and your developer is complaining about how he has to do it himself anyway, why don't you just leave me alone to my own team? What the fuck do you want? I seriously cannot understand. It's like you're living just to stress me the fuck out. Do you want me to quit? Is that what you really want? Jesus Christ. I've never met people more unreasonable than you.

Fuck you. I hate you.

Me in school: Math? When do I need know those details? I can look them up and just code it.

Me in high school: Computer science is way too math-y. I want to code!

Me coding php: Just make it work.

Me coding typescript: Just make it work.

Me coding scala: Just make it ... what ... how do I make it work!?!

Me asking stackoverflow: How do I do X in scala some functional programming stuff in mind in order to keep immutability.

Somebody way smarter than I: "In scalaz, a function A => A is called an endomorphism and is a Monoid whose associative binary operation is function composition and whose identity is the identity function"

Me now: Fuck my old arrogant self.

Not sure how other developers handle this but I just had a break down and do not want to see another piece of code for at least a week :/

We're no strangers to code
You know the conventions and so do I
A full commit is what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other dev

I just want to tell you about my problem
Gotta make you solve it for me

Never gonna git you up, never pull you down
Never gonna rant around and rebase you
Never gonna merge your branch, never gonna say $#@*!!
Never gonna risk a cry and build you

"I understand you want to write your own code. But that's not professional. If you have reusable tested code just copy and paste it in your project"

I thought he was joking. But I am realising it's the most valuable advice in jy workplace

When I start #100daysofcoding ! In which you at least daily code for an hour. It can be your side project or learning something new. Just search on Twitter if you want to know more
I am sure many of you already know this !

Just a personal request to @dfox
Can you screenshot only the part of the behind the scenes code of devrant? Just the part of it.
I want to see the syntax and how the language is used.
Thanks.

Me talking with my manager for handover before I leave. Just found out, there is an interview for my position, full stack dev.

No one bother asking me or the manager for tech interview and general manager from business interview alone by herself.

Manager: Do you code?
Poor soul: Yes, I do.
Manager: You are hired!

Shit, now I want to know what they ask to tech candidate without tech ppl.

I practice what I call "Aggressive Oriented Programming" or AOP.

Whenever I'm investigating a bad bug, working on a project that I really hate, or dealing with messy code written by a messy developer, I often find myself resorting to an [internal] state of violence.

It's not like I scream and smash my screen (although sometimes I want to). It usually consists of a few git blames and some curse words in print statements for debugging. This is just my way to vent.

I don't think I'm smart, but why most of the people are so retarded??
They want to just make the code work and skip home!
Not caring about how their code effects the whole system!

So I had this conversation with my boss yesterday...

Me: Hey, I found this bug in the other team's code that has a major impact on what we're trying to do. Can you ask them to look into it?

Boss: No, I don't want to be the one who has to tell them there's a major bug in their code. Find a workaround.

M: But... It isn't really a major bug, it just has a big impact on our side of things.

B: Workaround!

Fuck bosses who value how they think they look to other devs over a day of my time. Fuck.

I'm pretty fucking sure that if I were to quit my job, I'd have to gather the fucking requirements, create the fucking user stories, and then JIRA the ever-living fuck out of it before I could submit my fucking resignation.

I just want to write fucking code.

During a code review I was told that
if(x and y){
if(z){}
}

Will be slower to run than
if(x and y and z){}

I mean if you want to talk about programming practices and uniform code yes absolutely but any compiler will treat these identically, not to mention the assembly being identical. She was a superior though so I just went along with it.

So a friend of mine is starting to learn PHP and HTML and he tells me:
"I wrote some code in HTML but I can't run it through the browser"

I'm not brave enough to tell him you can't "run" HTML

But later, he told me "so now i'm writing PHP just to understand how it works, but don't want to install the program to run PHP"

How the fuck you gonna learn?

I already know I'm gonna have to build what he wants to do :/ at least a couple thousand euros incoming :D

My boss knows nothing about development. JUST buzzwords.

*in regards to a project* Boss: "just write it in PHP; it'll be easy!"

Me: "you know PHP?"

Boss (fully serious): "...enough to be dangerous."

He has never written a line of code in his life, let alone has any clue about what PHP does. Whenever I want to fuel my rage, I think about this moment.

Anyway I just want to fucking write code. I don't want to deal with people or give an opinion that is not appreciated. My manager says I am too aggressive but the truth is I hate stupidity and incompetence. I tell them their ideas are shit and not in a polite way and they make HR call me. Now I don't say shit and they are asking what I think. I think all of you are cunts that's what I think.but I don't say that. I say no comment when I know they are about to fall into a massive ditch. Will I stop them? Fuck no. Will I help them out if the ditch? Maybe, if it only involves writing code. I can't do diplomacy. I'll definitely be a fucking tyrant if I ever ruled a nation.

Every time when I double click a .cs file and Visual Studio begins to load.... Noooo! Stop. I just want to look at the code for 5 seconds. I don‘t need VS for that! Damn!

Your code sucks bro!!
It fucking sucks!!
Couldn't tell you face to face but I'll just keep what I want to tell you here.
It really sucks. You shouldn't be coding.
Get a farm.

Junior, junior, junior. I'm like -junior. We want a junior with 3 years experience. How is someone supposed to get to the 3 years experience if there aren't any jobs accepting juniors will no professional experience. I can code, , albeit not professionally, that's why I want a job, to learn in a professional setting, but the junior jobs all want past experience.

Maybe one day. Maybe never. For now I'll just keep rolling on the grind in my shitty factory job. Moving boxes from one place to another with the toughest mental challenge being which way to stack said boxes.

I like writing code, I'm good at writing code, why do I have to be a manager? I just want to work with people, stop pushing me into middle management.

Here is what I see in industry right now.
Don't go on math but get the gist.

1. 9 of 10 developers are Web developers
2. 9 in 10 developers want to be data scientist
3. 9 out of above actually give up and start doing Web development
4. 9 in 10 developers think CS education is not necessary.
5. 9 in 10 developers want to work for Google Facebook and Microsoft.
6. 9 in 10 developer don't make it to above companies.
7. 9 in 10 developers think design and test are important but never do it.
8. 9 out of 10 developers don't want to code after 5 years and just want to exit industry to non technical roles.
9. 9 out of 10 developers don't get rants and dev memes posted here.

What's your take on this

Whenever I automate a lot of menial code, so that after that I only declare what I want, and I immediately and automatically get it just the way I wanted, I feel LIKE A GOD.

Bow to me you stupid computer! I now command you with just a thought!

So I'm tasked with rewriting the old software my employer uses to track basically anything in his company. They want to stick quite close to the old workflow as much as possible, I get that.

"Why exactly do you need access to the system? No you don't need to look at it just recreate the flow. I'll give you the sql structure is that OK? Oh and this won't take long, you can copy from the old code can't you? Wait why do you need access to the code? No. "

🙄

Gj Mastercard! My card just got blocked because every time I want pay and 3D secure code is needed, every first SMS that day is delayed by 5 minutes so session expires and I have to try again...now it happened quite a few times and card got blocked. Fucking shit...

Boss: oh so you are working on that unrealistic 3week project ? Let me also assign you some completely unrelated office work.
Me: But I'm a programmer, researching other companies and contacting them looking for new projects is not part of my job descrip...
Boss: oh don't worry I'm sure you'll do great!
Me: that's not what I'm sayi...
Boss: ok I have to go now, have it ready by tomorrow!
Me:(crying internally)...ok.

I want to get in the habit of proper documentation of my code, But i'm not sure how it's formatted, how it should look or how I should even begin writing documentation? Do I open a document and just take snap shots of my code and explain how it works? I'm a little confused. Do I take pictures of my UI and explain how to use it? Is it like writing a book?

Code is not the only thing I do. Sad but true.

Sure, sometimes I just want to scream "JUST LET ME CODE", but internal hackathons and PO 1-on-1s make me feel like there's a meaning beyond my 34 open tabs.

!rant

I am a Windows user and have been using Mac for last 3 years. I knew SSH for a while, but used it just to connect servers when no other options were available.

Today I just found that I can connect to my Mac from my Android phone using SSH and can run any command I want. I am now running builds and deploying code from my phone since then.

I don't know why I am feeling this happy 😁

Help, I don't know if I want to code as a job for the rest of my life.
I feel that I miss physical activity in my job. Its just sitting and programming.
I like programming, it's an infinite series of puzzles, and I like puzzles. But more physical would be nice.

Maybe I should find a 2nd job that is more physical and balance the two.

What is everyone's thoughts on this?

The feeling when you just want to code code code but you have tons of other work 😥
Wish I could just program those tasks (laundry, dogwalk etc.)
Might as well build a robot, uh?!

This is just a bunch of things I needed to get out that I’ve been holding in for a while now.

Recently I’ve found myself In this state where I feel so depressed, lazy, and just pressured to program in general. I feel like it comes from me dismissing my abilities a lot of the time and I get demotivated to do stuff but at the same time when I do sit down and code I get distracted so easily, I can get work done but I just feel like I’m everywhere.

I want to apply for positions but I’m in this duality where I both feel like I can or can’t do it, I feel like wherever I apply to will not be accepting to people that don’t have a big degree or a ton of work experience and that I’ll get fucked on it. I’m fucking anxious that if I do get a job they will be like “hey fucking do X” and I will have no fucking clue how to even do X, and I’ve had people tell me that they know for a fact I can do it but I still fucking can’t believe it because I just completely doubt myself because I have failed at things like learning certain frameworks or failing to make the things I want and having to turn to simpler projects first because I’m too overwhelmed by the scale and I didn’t do any thinking about it before hand.

I don’t know if I’m making sense at all, I always write out rants like this and I always just erase them because I fucking hate whining like this but I need to let it out before I go more crazy I’ve been holding so much in for a long time now and it’s not been good.

I just over all feel terrible, anxious, and unproductive and I want it to stop.

One thing I hate about WinForms:

"do not modify the contents of this method with the code editor."

How the phook do I add eventhandlers without adding them in the code? By some mysterious ways in the so called "designer"? Click and drag? Wearing a tie and talking to the computer? Making a phone call to Microsoft? Immersing into VR and ordering an event handler from a virtual store?

No, I've always just typed whatever I want to achieve and I'm going to do so whatever those know-it-all comments say in the auto-generated code.

You can call me a conservative old fart, but nothing beats writing my own code.

Going through the typical phase of being depressed because of feeling underdeveloped skill wise and ignorant knowledge wise; despite how much I learn. God, spent 3 days on a recursive dynamic programming problem and couldn't implement it right... then I decided to glance at someones solution on github and turns out he did what I couldn't do in 70+ lines of code in 20. Sigh, just want to right concise and clear code and become a better programmer all together, but that obviously takes time. For the mean time I am feeling quite defeated.

A couple of weeks ago I went to an interview where I was asked the following questions back to back: "What would you do if you were the prime minister?" && "What would you do if you were the attorney general of the United Nations".
Needless to say, I wasn't prepared for that...

Firebase is pure fucking assrape!
How can these spoiled cunts of Google "develop" such a stinking pile of rotten placenta?
No, one fucking Promise is not enough... you have to return Promises for every single smegma function!
I want to just blow up this ugly afterbirth!!

It seems that Google devs are just spoiled MacCunt Pro brats who copy-paste code around until something "kind of works".

I don't want to do anything. Maybe I'll sleep, pretend that my task is harder than it really is, and conveniently forget that I have a meeting. Last week was spent debugging issues that either turn out to be a non-backend issue or is a backend issue but from someone else's code.

The feeling of time being wasted doesn't make me want to make up for them. It makes me want to take a break instead, lie low, and see if I can really start working on the new tasks before some random shit blows up into my face.

I am exhausted. I just want to melt into my sofa.

I gave into my restlessness again and worked afterhours just to "improve" my code only to end up reverting all said changes because the code was already working fine. I cleaned it up and said, "That's it. You're clean and working. I'm never gonna touch you again." The same shit I say to every hooker I encounter.

I want to lock my shit up and forget about them. I need to get over the nagging thought that the reviewer may be burdened with too many review points. I'll just accept that I did what I can, overdoing will make it worse, and if something's not right and I missed it, the reviewer will point it out. That's what they do.

What the fuuuck? This is so common sense but I can't nail the idea into my head. Cutting down on the coffee. I hate people who waste my time and yet here I am.

I don’t just want to learn how to scrap together applications.

I want to become an engineer; one that can wear that badge properly.

I spent a day or two reading my peers code base in .NET Core to start learning its wizarding ways. I found myself emulating some of the patterns.

Then I found a tutorial series on putting together a correctly decoupled RESTful API...the same chap wrote an SDK for Azure CosmoDB.

THIS is what I am talking about.

I can’t believe these guys at work have twenty years C# experience between them and they are churning out this shit for more than 1.5x my salary.

I want to become this but I swear half the coding world does NOT care.

I built a basic MVP for a client as a proof of concept for his startup. It was a quick thing just to prove a point do I rattled it out in procedural php.

Sadly it was successful and has somewhat taken off. It’s also grown arms and legs.

It works. The user will never know, but the code is SHIT. I never thought it would still be here.

I’m want to re-write it now in laravel.

But...... ugh

I'll just check my Amazon account..

Oh, they want to send me an SMS code to prove its me, that's nice..

Oh wait, its not a code, its a URL !

That I have to type out by hand to my PC...

That's a right pain !

Not everyone has an all singing all dancing phone connected to their number !

What's wrong with a simple 6 digit code !

better late than never.
So I just decided to go with Gitlab after being a Microsoft Team Services user.
To do next on my list:
Move away from .Net for backend services, any suggestions? I use dotnet core due to being able to easily finish what I want and with less code to write. Tried Springboot for Java but not a Java fan, might checkout kotlin though

Local backend at work: Perfect
Local backend at home: 401 user not authorised
:/

Who here actually uses GoLang? I’ve thought about eventually adding it to my tool belt.

But while on the GoLang topic, what is it good for? I’ve heard it’s good for web backend but can it produce software too?

Why are you expected to have people management skills as your experience grows? I don't want to deal with people, I just want to deal with my code 😢😫

I just found a 980 line long method in one of our legacy code bases.... And I need to add to it. There are no unit tests and I desperately want to refactor that shit....

Sometimes I just want to blame everyone in this group for their shitty code, but then I realize, that Im just the intern and only here for around 2 weeks ...

Instead I cry in silence.

It's 00:54. I'm supposed to wake up at 8.30AM. Not even tired. In front of my computer, with a frozen Visual Studio Code on the left screen and a frozen Madeon music on the right screen.
My CMS won't get compiled anymore, due to lack of memory. I have 16gb of RAM, gave it 4 of them, and it froze. If I give it less, it just won't compile. Why. I can't figure out wether if it's my code which has some memory leaks or if there's just too much JavaScript in it. What did fuck up? My code? React? Material-UI? The way I want to mix them all together? Maybe I just shouldn't have used React to cover up everything, and maybe I shouldn't have used Ruby on Rails the way I did.

Fuck.

What do I do now.

90% of beginner questions are so damn annoying. I get it, some people are new and still learning but for the love of God, I just want to tell these kids to shut the fuck up, sit their ass down and WRITE SOME DAMN CODE, instead of bitching and moaning about what they best language is or how to magically read a tutorial and become a ninja in a day.

Fuck.

Well fuck. My filament run out. SHIIIIIIT and well its start of the year and i cant buy another spool. Fuck. Well i guess i will code some shit until i can buy some spool. This is fucking horrible. I know what i want for christmass at least. LOOOOOOOOOOT OF FUCKING FILAMENT !!!!!!!!!!! 50KG ? not enough ! 100KG Maybe i can do with that for few weeks. 200KG ? Ouuuu yeah. Naaaah just kidding. I will order a fucking 5KG spool. That should last till christmas i hope.
And breaking news: Im introducing new tag.

HAXK20 SHITTY RANTS !!!
I know amazing ?
You can now subscribe to me or if you want just the shitty rants then just search the tag.

It seems like I'm going on an assignment to a company working with Angular. Reading through the documentation I just want to ask all Java developers to get their greasy hands out of JavaScript. It feels like GWT all over again with Google reinventing core JS technologies just so that it looks like Java. Dependency injections? Observable wrappers? RxJS in general? WHAT IS THE POINT? Why can't I do this in a way adhering to web standards? Why can't I simply use fetch() or axios or whatever? Why can't you support reactivity without forcing me to write more boilerplate than I had on my central heating boiler? I just want to code and not be forced to discover what Google developers think web should be like.
Please, let me out of this hell.
Fortunately, it's not gonna be a long assignment.

I really want to see the source code for pokemon go even though I'm 100% certain I'll be unable to understand it I just want to look at it and try to learn how it works

But I'll probably never see the source in my life :(

Around 6 years ago I started at this company. I was really excited, I read all their docs then I started coding. At every code review, I noticed something was a little off. I seemed to get lots of weird nitpicking about code styling. It was strange, I was using a linter, I read their rules but basically every review was filled with random comments. About 3 months in I noticed, "oh! there aren't actually any rules, people are debating them in my code reviews!" A few more reviews went by and then I commented, "ya I'm not doing any of this, code review isn't a place to have philosophical debates." All hell broke loose! I got a few pissed off developers, and I said, listen I don't care what the rules are, you just need to clearly fucking articulate them and if you want to introduce one, I don't care about that either just don't do it in the middle of my review. I pissed off 1 dev real bad. Me and this dev were working together, the QA person on the team stood up and said "hey! you know what I love about your code reviews?!" The other dev and myself looked at each other kind of nervously, "I love that you're both right, these are all problems!"... 1 year later (and until now) me and the other dev are still friends. Leave it to QA to properly identify the bug.

PM said I modified code that change UI so user may not familiar with. So, how could I know what is user familiar with if PM doesn't include spec or user manual to me.

No one tell me how to solve the problem, since you just want problem to be solve I solved it my way. :)

While sitting in a train (5 hours trip) I really want to code something, unfortunately I dont have my laptop with me, so i just connected with ssh from my phone to my ubuntu vps, created some project via npm and use android app to edit the code. It is not perfect but works. Someone else code like that?

At the end of the day, I just want to fucking code. Paperwork can eat a dump truck of dicks.

A friend of mine and I are about to open a company and we're hiring a developer to develop websites, no specific needs, it literally just have to work.

We found this guy, who develops goodlooking websites, but isn't really a developer, meaning that he just uses visual composers. (which doesn't differ too much from what we want).

Well this guy kinda loves us because we're actual developers who know how to code "properly".

It's the first time someone likes me just bc I'm a developer and I'm already superhappy!

Hope it will get good soon enough!

First !rant. I'm working on a 2d game using Game Maker at school and I just wounder if putting constants up this way makes you cringe. Is there a better way? This code is only run when switching to a weapon and he values can be put into the shooting script itself. I just want to know how you put in mass constants in general coding or even at all.

I was think of using ajax to pass data from javascript to php because of some validation to my multiple checkbox, then before i go home the idea hit me to just use validation in php with some basic variable manipulation and if else, i just wasted 2 hours of searching just to arrived at a basic solution, i think it's much better to think before you code about what you want to do,but when i open my text editor i get distracted a lot.

Just got an internship in a big company. Related to web development but they want me to use/maintain legacy jsp, servlet code. Should I take it? There are other departments too but I have been put in this shitty one.

Arch I want to love you. But you're so freaking unstable and I just want to code in peace without you freaking out every week about config files being screwed up. Why can't we have the stability of more mainstream distros AND the Pacman package manager + AUR? Some of us have to code for a living you know.

I'm really tempted to just go back to Debian to set it and forget it. PPA's be damned.

Not the code review itself, but having repeatedly to nag my project leader just to get a review is the worst.

I'm "only" a student and it's a project without fix deadlines so it's alright with me that it is low priority.
But - I want to learn something here, I really do, I'm new to C# and far from mastery. Apart from that my focus was mainly hardware during the last years.
I need some fucking brutal and honest criticism on my code, damnit!
That's all.

Taking advice from devRant and just working on some documentation for hacktoberfest. Well until I can find a project that I want to add code to

So I have this Boss, he is actually good. But he micro manage everything. He writes the code that supposedly we should write. He just want us to turnover what he write. And he just want us to understand it.

So at the end of the day. We didn't learn something.

Biggest one is dealing with idiots who break everything. Can’t space anything properly. Oh you needed that function? I got rid of it because it broke my code, and it was easier. Oh yes, just perfect, get rid of a core fucking function you retard that multiple parts of the code rely on. (Luckily it wasn’t pushed to the main, otherwise everything would’ve broken...)

Another one is finishing a damn project, I have like 20 by now... all in different languages that I want to learn. Time comes to work on it? Oh wait, let’s make this because it’s more fun! Just adding more projects to my graveyard.

I don't know my problem is. I lost my motivation to code, my enthusiasm and excitement to read a code and solve a problem. My love of my life for 6 years whom I thought she's the one, gave up on us. It was a long journey, lots of ups and downs, but really worth the time and sacrifice. Now, she's doing good, very happy on her life judging from her social media. Can't believe she just moved for 2 months. To be honest, i want her to be happy but quite bitter that she just moved on quite fast. And I don't if this is the reason why I lost my motivation and enthusiasm to code. Or maybe I just don't like the project we're working on. Well, I really don't like it since it's a mobile game, I really want to build webapp or mobile app but it's too late to change the project.

I'm not like this, I used to code until morning without noticing the time, excited to solve a problem that stuck on me for quite a while. I really became a lazy person right now. I feel the pressure to finish the project but I don't see myself working on it, I don't feel interested reading a code. I just play computer games instead of working on my project during my free time. I don't know if I'm depressed. I socialized with people, have fun, happy when I'm with them, but when I'm alone, sadness starts to creep in. I feel like there's an empty void in myself. I don't know, i just want the motivation and energy to work on my project. Im tired, lazy, and feeling burnt out. If you read until this very last sentence, thank you and I'm sorry for reading this nonsense.

You know what bugs me the most? When people make their code fast and efficient, but not updatable. Like if I want to add something for my program to look for I'd rather just put another item in an array than modify/add 30 lines. Jesus Christ people.

I'm just frustrated. I wanted a simple, statically-typed language that doesn't get in your way and offers GC. I can't find anything "just perfect".

- Go: enforces a style on you, nono.
- Rust: ownership system. I love it, but it's too low level for what I want.
- Scala: seems to have a bunch of useless and bug-prone features.
- Java: I hate how you have to declare and catch exceptions. Good practice, yes, but the code gets bloated with try-catch statements.
- C and C++: Too low level, no GC.
- C#: maybe? idk

I want to make a back-end for an app but I want it to be easy and fast. I need something with a gentle learning curve, not keep fighting the language. I'm between Java and Rust. Java's easier to use. Rust is rust <3, but it's hard, I haven't learned it properly and I just keep fighting the fucking compiler.

College admissions are looking bad rn (because yay for pandemic). Do I need a computer engineering degree for a regular dev job, or is IT enough?

I just want to write some damn code and drink tea, not reinvent the computer

Scala's default Seq is MUTABLE. Why the fuck do I want mutability in my functional scala code!?

Now I have to riddle my code with imports to scala.collection.immutable.Seq which looks just ugly.

Gosh dangit.

GOD I FUCKING HATE UNITY AND FUCKING C# SO MUCH
EVERY TIME I TRY TO MAKE IT DO WHAT I FUCKING WANT IT TO IT'S LIKE "mmmmmm nah lmao" LIKE FUCK WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FOLLOW FUCKING 3 LINES OF CODE NO MATTER HOW I PUT THEM OR ORDER THEM YOU BRAINDEAD FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT PROGRAM

No Rant:

I guess I will start a religous discussion with it but I want your opinion on what tool I should learn.
Vim or Emacs (or stay with my IDE)?

For all of my programmer life I used IDEs... From Eclipse over CodeBlocks over VS to IntelliJ.
But now I realized that I want to be one of the cool kids. And using plain IntelliJ is uncool. No matter how much I love this tool.

So now I want to invest some time into learning. I never managed to do much in Vim since all code-completions sucked ass, feedback on syntax errors was bad and I never saw how I could be any faster with that shit compared to what IntelliJ does for me.
Will Emacs solve all those problems? Will Emacs make me code 1000 times faster and make having a mouse useless?
Or am I just too dumb for Vim? Can Vim itself do what my IDE does for me? Will it make me look as cool as I want to be?
Or should I stick to IntelliJ and just install Vim bindings?

What is your opinion on Vim vs Emacs vs any IDE?

An excerpt from the encyclopedia of "Developer Confessions":
At times, when I have no clue what some code does, I comment it out to see what breaks. Sometimes I just want to see the code burn.

not really a rant but the more i code, the more fun it gets. i havent really dived this deep into coding and allowing myself to take most of my time doing it has made it more interesting for me. now i want to learn more and start creating personal projects aside from real university projects. people may think its weird that i have been devoting a lot of my time writing code, but i guess they just dont understand the difference of coding for grades and coding for fun.

we are all in it for fun!

I have no desire to be a jira centric developer.

I don't want to be proficient in handling a board or spending my days as a consultant in ticket comments.

I just want to grab a ticket and write code.

Anything short of this is not why I got into development.

if i work on PussyBranch to build up a feature, and DickBranch is my main branch so if i merge directly from Pussy into Dick and then work on Dick, and then switch to Pussy again then surely i wouldnt be able to commit to Dick because Pussy isn't filled up with the new code, right? I'd need to pull the latest code from Dick into Pussy branch. but what if i dont want to merge Dick into Pussy code? because what Dick contains, Pussy should not and that would cause anomaly and break uhh how do u call it, the purpose of the branch itself right. So if I want to work only on Pussy and commit just that segment of the new code into Dick, how do I do that? Do i have to force pushing Pussy code into Dick every time or can i do it without force command? serious answers only pls

also what alcohol is good for a more productive and longer hour coding sessions thx

Holy shit man...

I know its supposed to be hard but I cant ignore how much I want to give up right now.

I've been learning JS for months now, doing daily algorithm challenges, going strong on my freecodecamp dev map and still, I feel like I might no be cut out for this.

It's been more than a week now trying to implement a minimax algorithm into my tic tac toe game. I can't, for the life of me its just getting more frustrating by the day and its driving me crazy! How the fuck am I supposed to ever get a junior webdev job if I can't do something as simple as this!, And I keep reading and reading the theory but I cant implement it into my code! It just makes me want to quit (again)!

I really need to work on my attitude...

How do y'all deal with reading other people's code?

Context: was given a frontend project (I'm a frontend dev) that was started and is managed by a backend dev who just started doing frontend.

I want to start from scratch as I don't understand a thing he codes, conventions are all off, and the structure is just weird.

People hear talking about shit like "*high level stuff* SUCKS. YOU *big tech company* FUCKTARD." And I'm just here trying to graduate without failing a CS course because my teachers want me to mug up the code and not understand it! Needless to say, I don't mug up but it's just so fucking irritating when people in your class are mugging up the code and definitions like it's Redbull and scoring stellar grades. FUCK THIS SHIT!

Joined small scale-up months ago. I literally want to punch one of my coworker. Constant mental harassement, self-declared lead, rude and impolite. That coworker is socially awkward in the baddest and meanest way.

Oh boi.

Founders seems to not give a crap even if they told me they want a flat hierarchy. They let that coworker off the hook.

Not even mentioning that culture of oppression and repression.

If you're late you must bring chocolate and they'll remind you 256 times a day. Oh boy, I'm not late... I just don't want to come in the office.

Also, the code is atrocious.

What seemed like a dream job at first turned out to be a nightmare. Never been bullied since I started working. Now, I have a bully and a nemesis.

Ooooh boy.

Would telling someone in a code review that their code wouldn't even work and that a simple test would have caught it of they wrote one be considered rude? Should I just tell them exactly what the problem is and move on or make them figure it out?

I want people to be testing the code they write but I don't want to just become annoying to them by telling them constantly to add tests when there is no immediate payoff that these juniors obviously crave. Similarly I don't want to antagonise them when they are so early in their career.

So i informed my intent to leave the job in few months in pursuit of learning something new in tech. Boss is trying to convince me to not leave and said i should consider learning it after work hours. In fact, in his opinion, the best way to learn is just going ahead and learning it while doing it in the project ( which usually has impossible deadline and fugly code by colleagues who never thinks of good coding practices when typing their shit ).

Well guess what boss, I don't want to just live a life staring at monitor all day. I don't want to kill my eyes either.

Following his advise and not quitting would mean living a slave life.

I have other plans actually. Like being self employed and traveling the world which would be impossible if i follow the routine life.

Fun fact: he claimed he made an AI car back in 90s!

He also thinks I can't sense BS!😏

Client email: so you know that custom thing I wanted on my website that you made and I refused to pay for? Could you just send me the code, I'm gonna write my own.

*Staring at screen in disbelief and laughing*

Even if you were an awesome client, and you had paid, I still wouldn't just "give you my code" so you can write your own. You hired me to do it because you CAN'T not because you didn't want to, not because you're lazy, but because you are not mentally capable of making your own.

Me: I'm sorry, but I'm not sure you would even know where to start with this, what was wrong with the one built?

Client: I wanna put the code in my Salesforce so it can run the API request and automatically make a lead for me.

My code takes fields from a form, runs the data over to the API, gets the response, allows for user confirmation that the information is correct, and then sends all the relevant data to Salesforce as a lead.

Me: But that's exactly what mine does, just does it from your website where users will be entering the info, and once they've confirmed it you get a Salesforce lead.

Client: well some of my leads come from other places and I want to simplify everything.

Me: no, not possible, sorry.

If you didn't have 25 different websites for one company then all your leads would come from the same place and it would be simple.

I visited my college school today and my friends from lower years are still afraid of coding , i mean coding doesnt bite it just take time to understand , i think people want the easy way of understanding things rather than building up from nothing, thats why i love to code because i can literally make something out of nothing.

Today I dont feel that good.

I have only 1 month of my holiday temporary job left. After that Im going to university, the place that i have been dreaming about, the place where finaly i would finish my projects, where i would meet people like me that could support, help me with my passions.

I have no idea where i got that wave of saddnes. Normaly i dont feel that way. Job is unconfortable and sometimes stressing a bit but it is not the end of the world.

I just want to stay in confy bed for the whole day but i cant, i need that money for uni.

I tried to code yesterday but i just couldnt focus! Always when i try to finish the project, no matter what it is i just lose my motivation, its just gone.

Sometimes I wonder if that university is going to be as good as i was imaginig it, after numerous rants on devrant about their uni im not so sure... That dosent help me with my mood.

Is my terrible mood caused by loneiness? bad diet? or lazyness?
I just dont know... I just want to feel better. I just want to survive that month somehow, without that crushing feeling and constant depression.

I work on many projects at work. There's divisions of teams and each team typically has one project. Each one of those projects have weekly Sprint meetings.

That's great! For the team. That means each team has one meeting a week so it's not too disruptive for those individuals.

Me on the other hand? I've got my hand in all the buckets. I'm on every team. I'm the only person on every team. This means I get to go to every meeting.

Let me rephrase that:
This means I -have- to go to every. Single. Meeting.

Which means I have a meeting every. Single. Day. Even if I didn't touch that project that week.

It is literally THE biggest waste of time. I sit there in a 1-2 hour long meeting saying absolutely nothing, not even being spoken to. I could be working on other projects.

And these meetings normally interrupt something I'm working on. Conveniently in the middle of me being in my zone. It makes me completely un-motivated to work for the hour before the meeting because why bother if I'm just going to get interrupted? And then it takes an hour to get back into everything after the meeting because everyone is fooling around or complaining about the meeting.

So that's three hours of my 8 hour work day completely wasted.

I lack inspiration to practice my c++ and it's infuriating, the result is no code written in over a week.
I have extremely high expectations for myself and right now I lose sleep, sanity and any little self esteem I had in me regarding my progress
I know you can't rush knowledge, but I just want to built something at my level of practice that is somewhat useful to me and / or others, but when I do it, it's either shit or someone my level made it way better even if I really put some efforts in it
I won't quit but jesus this just feels awful.

My parents love the fact that I code and study computer science! They've always been super supportive of what I do. I just can't wait until they stop asking me to put on netflix whenever they want to watch a movie 😭

I don't want to use Visual Basic!

I'm a 17 year old boy and I have a couple of years of experience with coding. At school we had to choose between a couple of things to do 2 hours every week. One of them was about computers and programming. Sounds fun, right?

The teacher is letting us code in Visual Basic in MS Excel. I tried to explain him that I know how to code, but he still wants me to listen to him.

He doesn't even use any indentation! I can't look at it and I don't want to use VB it sucks just let me use js or anything else but not VB! Why won't you just accept I'm 10 times better than you! Just let me do my thing!

Now he thinks he can challenge me with a password strength checker. I want to use js, some regex to make it very short and efficient and a nicely styled web page. But now I'll be forced to use a horrible programming language (VB) I never used before!

Fuck you for asking for my advice and then just disregarding it because it doesn't dovetail with what you were hoping for. You continue to justify your shit code design as "the way it has to be". Bullshit, I just told you other ways to do it. You didn't want to hear it. Open your mind. Learn something new. Be a professional. Your code is ass and you should feel like an ass. Don't ask for my help anymore. Prick.

I just used Visual studio c++ for the first time. In comparison to intellij it just sucks, so many features are missing, im fighting with the editor all the time.. For example Code completion, visual studio suggests me the method name, i press enter, new line inserted, wtf? Apparently only tab is working here, next try, visual studio suggests method, I click tab, method name inserted but whithout brackets, omg. The standard shortcut for commenting out code is CTRL+K followed by CTRL+C, if you want to use the code again you need to use CTRL+K followed by CTRL+U. HOW STUPID IS THIS? Refactoring of code, e.g. Method names also sucks...

I'm down to write multi dimensional Git. I'm tired of losing the code that I wrote in my dream to go up in smoke every time when I woke up.
I just want to commit and push it to the dimension that I'm livin'. So that I'll have access to the code that I wrote in my dream.

Since ive started college my will to program has become non-existant. Im a self taught programmer since 12, it used to be MY thing and i loved it. I used to spend hours a day just programming personal projects because i love it. However since college has been getting serious with this being my junior year and having part-time contract work i dont "love it" as much. Im a little scared, i have no time to just code for fun and when i do have time it feels like work because thats the only other time i code.

What should i do guys, i dont want to fall out of love with programming, it's part of who i am and i can feel im losing it.

Is it just me or are there others who like programming and enjoy the work but just can't do it all day. After 10 hours I don't even want to look at a screen much less code more or read about it.

On the days when I just want to sob and put my head through the monitor....

I get out a piece of paper and draw my processes (whether that be code or mapping etc). Each step of each process, helps to represent the input and output of each method.

This makes it easier to find which step isn't giving the desired output....

Either this or the rubber duck method. :)

I feel shitty cause I've never wrote near 100 lines of python code or just a large number of lines in any language. I want to write large amounts of code that will actually work.

First day is over on the new job. So much information about onboarding and hr, but I just want to code...

I was rejected by the company that I had already made plans to work for, all of it was perfect, but I just got rejected based on a video response question basis. At this point I'm down so much that I want to leave the field. I feel like I'm giving up way to easily and especially since it's only a start to my career but I just don't know if I am good enough anymore, the hesitation to write code has set in and I don't know where to go anymore... where or how do you guys get your inspiration?

I just want to code.

Literally a fresh install of manjaro.

Well... Back to antargros!

Sometines after a long day of having clients continually find edge cases that break the code makes me want to be like.

"Hey! Having the app work well was never part of the scope for the project, just that it would work ish."

But I know better.

Ugh I really wish I could just decide on something and role with it, haven't touched my book or website for a while so of course my websites code is all fucking horrible and spaghetti and I want to rewrite and revisit a lot of my book -,-

Why can't I just be happy with something like this!

When I was 8, I was just casually using the computer I had, and then I suddenly started asking these questions in my head, “how does all of this work? How does the computer know when I press that key on the keyboard? How does it know I moved the mouse to the right?” And so on and so on. So I started searching for answers. Then I saw code examples and stuff and I told myself that I want to understand this and just started learning. Hooked ever since!!

A JavaScript developer want to understand my 1000+ lines pythonic python code without any prior knowledge about python and he just want to understand it so that he can translate it into js. What should i do?

turned down software engineering job offers after college because I thought it be a good to take a temporary position as a controls engineer so I could pay off student loans faster.

realizing how big of mistake it was. working long hours on uninteresting tasks. I just want to code for a living.

I inherited some code today. I am in the process of reworking it to drop into my framework so I can use it with our product. I am seeing this throughout the code...

try:
\do something\
except:
pass

Ahem... HANDLE YOUR DAMN EXCEPTIONS!!! DON'T JUST PASS THEM INTO THE BLACK HOLE OF NOTHINGNESS! FFS!!! Using pass like this means "Fuck it. I don't care if this fails and I want NOTHING to tell management when it does. I want to blindly look into their frustrated eyes and say ..duhh, I don't know why it failed... Fuck troubleshooting. You know what, this job isn't meant for me anyways." My outer voice is politely saying "There is a better way to do this. Please allow me to show you." Meanwhile my inner voice is flipping tables and clubbing baby seals. /rant

I want to spend about 10 minutes a day in to small code brain teasors.

I know there are apps like SoloLearn. I don't want to learn hard new concepts but rather just maintain the basic ones. I am looking for an app that gives me quizes, not just informational text

What would u recommend?

Sometime my code is so wrong that I can almost hear the mother of algorithm crying out loud.

I just want to remove that piece of code from my project....no, from my mind, my life.

nested ternary operators

like/dislike?

I used to hate them cuz I would have to break them apart just to understand them, but now I use ternary operators so much, nesting at least one level is ok for me.

but i'm the only person that reads my code, what's the concensus.. nesting one level bad?

I wouldn't want someone reviewing my code if they couldn't wrap their head around a simple ternary, so if only myself or people more experienced than myself will ever read them, then fuck it, i'm using them

I was reviewing a Pull Request recently and there was this line
`return josn(202, 'Record does not exists')`

I told the developer that, status code and description does not match.
He just did not want to accept that he was wrong and told me that, since this function is not exposed to public, it does not matter.

Whats wrong in accepting that you are wrong. We do make mistakes, consciously or unconsciously. Huur. I regretted reviewing his codes there after.

Sometimes, I run tests just because I want a break from writing code. In good cases it's so that I take a moment to think about what I'm going to do next. In most cases however, I'm struggling for motivation

This has just happened

general channel to discuss sonos.
I have sales team less than 1m away.

this office is a fucking pub.
free beers, people telling jokes and
having non work conversations, free beer/wine.

The dream! unless you want to code.
if you want to code....ah NO WFH POLICY.

Passive aggressive coworkers that have problems with each others work but instead of working out problems together they just complain about each other to me and try to drag me into it. What makes people think I want to play office politic games with them? I'm just there to code!

And another weekend full of work, because I don‘t get shit done in the office.

Being kind if the lead dev in my team, everyone is coming to me for nearly everything and I rarely have time to work on my current ‚fulltime‘ project.

It‘s really frustrating. I just want to code .__. FML

(Maybe I should learn other programming languages and switch jobs? I always wanted to learn Haskell)

Today I woke up 🌅 wanting to write code that is more art 🎨🖌️ than just the usual dry technical stuff...

I want to look at my commits this afternoon and feel proud about mastery and craft!

Reading a post on Quora lead me here. At first, I didn't like the look and feel so I hit f12 to see if I code see the source code. One would think that after x hours spent coding at my work desk, I would just want to sit at home and watch tv or play games. However, there is something fulfilling about seeing a coded product and taking a quick glance at some source code.

Your code is like your face! Looking at it often it makes me laugh... But sometimes I just want to punch the shit out of it!

Hacky code post:
property var value: if(editing || !editing) function(othervalue)

I am coding in a property system that only updates an expression if a variable involved emits a signal. Well the function won't get called unless I change a value. I also want to "value" to be updated when editing changes. I also want it to update even if editing doesn't change. So the or-ing of the state of editing.

The result is the function gets called when object is initialized. Then when the editing flag changes it gets updated again. The workaround of doing this is much worse and requires more hacky code. So I am resigned myself to just or-negating the editing value.

I find dynamically typed language a lot easier to read and understand than statically typed language.

What's up with all these interfaces, types and abstractions, its just too much!

I do want structure when writing code, but also the flexibility to test things without the f*** interface/type errors!!!

What does projektaquarius do when he doesn't have a working IDE? Reformat code (that I am already refactoring) to an industry standard format and prepare for the arguments that are going to come from the other group who has their own coding standard that isn't industry standard.
Already preparing for the Pascal case versus Camel case argument. Emotionally that is. Mentally the argument basically just amount to "your group didn't want to refactor the code so we did it. Live with it or you do it."

Ever had the experience of looking for the perfect js library to do some small job for you, after hours of evaluating, trying to tweak the one that seems closest to what you want, you end up thinking I should rather just code this myself.

Spent all morning debugging legacy code that I need to migrate.

Most of the time is just waiting for it to load --pieces of data-- entire tables from the database and then filter out the records it doesn't want using some app logic.

WHAT SORT OF MONKEY WRITES CODE LIKE THIS? HOW WAS THIS EVEN ALLOWED INTO PRODUCTION...

I have to open Notepad to write down my chain of thoughts, steps, and things to check once the next breakpoints are hit so that I don't forget them.

So in theory I'm being paid all morning to sit around and do nothing.

That sounds great but I'm falling asleep... Shoulda worked from home...

What was I saying again...yea...

DON'T HIRE MONKEYS!!! THEY WRITE SHIT CODE THAT WASTES EVERYONE'S TIME EVEN AFTER THEY LEAVE...

I'm going to lunch now... Hopefully Notepad has enough into for me to remember what I was doing...

I have co workers who laugh at me everytime I discuss to them how we should create clean code. (create functions for repeating code, naming conventions, generic code).

They would brag instead how they make another javascript ui library/plugin work(we are web developers by the way). Looks good in the front end but a mess in the backend.

I already created generic classes, generic database views that can be used by them if they want. But they create a new one with the same functionality.

I am a bit of a shy guy, and they are bit of loud, and I don't want to look like a know-it-all-guy, so I just let them do what they want.

I am just concerned how we can work easier by easily reading each others code.

I just spent 3 days with 1 or 2 hour of sleep just for learning a new way to code. Not a project it just for learning. And it make me crazy i cant stop thinking about that. And now im not sleeping at all and code almost 24 hours. But i feel a lot of fun while writing a line of code. I enjoyed every sound i made with keyboard.

Im soo happy now i learned a lot of things. I dont know how to stop and i dont want to stop coding.

I dont know what im talking but thanks devrant for letting me post this shit.