Prof: Okay guys, i need a flash drive to put a copy of your next project.

Me: *pulls out a flash drive and sho-..*

Prof: except you, I dont trust you.

My most successful project? The next one.

If that doesn't happen, read this again.

The DNS server I'm writing in PHP (largely taken from another project) is starting to work!

Next to just blocking queries it logs every blocked query so I can have stats :3

A little terminal output:

HR Project update meeting.
Duration: 1h
Content:
1) recap of previous meeting
2) overview of what we will discuss in next meeting.

I have a friend that does 3D Modeling and asked my permission to use my room where i work for a scene on his next project. I said sure and he gave me this. I like it 👌

note: Not the worst dev I've interviewed but worst I've worked with.
A guy who worked in my company before me "HARDCODED" the entire calendar for next 10 years starting 2016 in dictionaries and arrays in Python for a project.

Sales guy (s) : how many hours do you think this project will take?
Developer (d) : well I guess about 250 hours

(one week later)

S: I finally sold that project
D: nice! When do we start?
S: you'll start next week and it needs to be done one month later
D: 40 hours a week, times 4 weeks for one month is roughly 160 hours
S: yes
D: but I said I needed 250 hours
S: yeah but they didn't accept that so I sold it for less
...
(and no the scope didn't adjust to the new time frame)

Boss: For next project I suggest we use webassembly
Me: Why not use real assembly

Can't ssh to my vps at work; hello new hobby project!
(server hosted on vps, http request -> shell -> http response)
Next up is supporting an interactive shell

Interview (first job):

Interviewer: So what languages do you know?

Me: Well, i learnd C, C++ and Matlab scripting, but i'm learning C# as a personal project.

Interviewer: Perfect!

First day:

Interviewer(now boss): So, a guy is leaving next week and you will be replacing him. He has 70 projects and you will be responsible for this production test platform in JAVA

meeting a client for small web project, we did not agree price of project soo I left...next week I saw him on tv, he was arrested as a pedophile

I bet every developer has a few "personal" projects you started once, but then abandoned because you started working on your next fun project.

So many unfinished things ;)

"Next time, well do it properly from the start." - Every team, at the end of every project.

!rant

A: "Hi, I'm A, I'm the CEO of X, we had this project I'd like you to do for me"
Me: "Hi, can I have more details about the project?"
A: "Ah yes, this is some kind of e-commerce for our start-up, we need you to do a web app, iOS, and Android app in 1 month"
Me: "OK we can do it in 2 month."
A: "OK we'll let you know our decision tomorrow"

(next month)
A: "Sorry we have to postpone this project"

(next 5 month)
A: "Hi! now I'm building this Y start-up and we need you to help us migrate our android app to web"
Me: (Looks feasible than his last project) "OK, I can do it"
A: "Can we meet tomorrow?"
Me: "OK"
(tomorrow)
Me: "Hello? where will we meet?"
Me: "?"

(next month)
A: "Hi! Sorry for not replying, can we meet this week for the Y project?"
Me: (...)

Really pissed of by tha Boss!
Working late with the project then next day, the Boss is talkin nonsense.....

When browsing I saw this, quite an ultimate view

"Everyone must attend this meeting. It's really important that you all attend".

Me: *walks into meeting with other co-workers

Host: So what should we discuss today?

Co-worker 1: We can discuss how we did on the recently completed project.

Host: We'll save that for next meeting.

Co-worker 2: Any strategic plans for upcoming project?

Host: That too, for next meeting.

Me: Black Panther.

Host: That was actually a great movie. I saw it over the weekend. Who else saw it? ....

Me (in my thoughts): Just wow! 😂

PS: I still haven't seen that movie.

When you ask the PM which one of two projects is of higher priority because there isn't enough time to complete both and he responds "of course project A is of higher priority but project B needs to be finished by next week! *leaves room*"

I'm going to call my next project "hacky hack hack" 😂

Source: Guardian

Designer - *showing an animation made with after effects* Lets add this really cool animation in our website

Me - Actually that will be very difficult with plain CSS. We will have to use some heavy animation libraries, and we don’t have that much time for the project.

*next day*
Designer - Found a better animation
*shows another animation*

Me - *awkwardly* This is more difficult to implement than the previous one

*next day*
Designer - What about this one
*shows yet another difficult animation*

Me - *ashamed and questioning my skills* ummm....

Designer - you know what, just add fade-in-out

Boss: Here's the next project that I would you to start immediately.
Me: So the client wants <Application Name>
Boss: Yes and it's due on Friday after 2 weeks.
Me: Yes can be done. By what time today you can give me the requirements.
Boss: Not today, I will give you the requirements next week Friday.
Me: So I should start the project next week Friday.
Boss: You have to start the project today
Me: Start with what? There is no requirement. Excuse me, I need a break.

That time I joined the robotics club and made the pid loop for the robot was one of my favorite projects. I learned ROS, and I created the entire chain of software and hardware to control six motors. That one project set up my experience for the next 4 years and led to a few jobs. I miss robotics.

My next project is creating a genetic algorithm that can play with crypto currencies for me.

I shouldn't have told my family. They think i'm going to be sharing the money now 🙃

me, browsing the web: oh wow what a cool css framework, bookmarked, ill totally use it for my next project

me, making a project: "free bootstrap templates"

My first rant so be kind ;)

All week have been waiting for a day off to finish a side project, and when that day finally comes, my daughter has a fever.

Will have to wait till next week.

It happened 2 nights ago.
We had a whatsapp project for the distributed application programming class, my project mate and me were coding for 2 weeks whole day to finish it, especially with the end-to-end encryption feature that teacher asked, till 2 nights ago the project was trash, the private chat wasn't working and and nothing else is done we had only the UI, we was really doomed especially we had 1 more day to deliver the software, and we decided to deliver the project as a trash and get marks from the UI and the presentation.....
Till the night before deadline at 8 pm
I wanted to try fix some interface pictures and to make it better......
The next thing it was 6 am and the project is full working..
When I told my project mate he was not believing, I had to swear multiple times fot him and hat to go and show him the project by the eye.
We delivered the prohect and got 22/25 😁😁😁
It was incredible I didn't believe my self at first place.
Sory for the long story 😓.

When client compares his cheap 3 months old project App with well established multi Billion $ Bigwigs' Apps :|

"Look how cars are moving smoothly on map in UBER, I want something like that"

"Look how fast is GOOGLE Search"

"Look how AMAZON figures out what we want next"

Are you fuckin serious :|

Sent a corrupt .rar file to a client's nephew/cousin to upload on their server (he managed the hosting account) in a bid to buy myself some time to finish the project. It worked! I was given the login details to upload the work myself the next morning. They didn't understand Git.

Just canceled my last week vacation (of three weeks) because the deadline is in that last week. I requested my days off BEFORE the project was even planned.
They better appreciate I did this, otherwise I'll be absent when the next deadline is due.

Project is done, customer is happy, I'm done and happy. Next job please!

Our company just had a meeting with another company which are our main investors for a project for the next quarter. I sit down next to my team lead and we all wait for their last HR person to arrive. Ten minutes later a girl which I hooked up with last week walks in and sits next to the other company's "main boss". Spoiler alert, she is the bosses daughter.

We might pull out from the project but I sure didn't last week.

I hope this rant doesn't get deleted...

Deciding a domain or project name, got to be the next worst after naming variables and exposed method names

Me: Hey Guys we've been working on this application(project 1) for 4 months and i think we're almost done.

Owner of Company(Not My Boss): CooCook4Choo we moving you to project 2, forget about the previous one.

2 months go by, project is completed.

Boss: I've got another project for you
Me: Awesome!

1 month later...

PM: We're moving you back to project 1
Me: Why?
PM: Our senior dev resigned, we only have junior Devs and we need a lot of help before deployment next month.
Me: Why am i moving back to a project i was taken off of
PM: Where an agile company and you will be moved off many projects
Me: **Fuuuuuuuuuuck!!!* Ok i'll need documentation of everything that happened in the past three months, the current issue, what the current sprint revolves around and A demo of what has been added.
PM: Relax, I've got a lot of work myself, you will get them soon.

2 days later, still don't have what i need, PM is on vacation.

Me: Guess i don't have any work to do.

The only technique I know.

Get hired straight out of uni. Project architect disappears right at beginning and I am left as a graduate employee to build a travel booking web app. Learning new front end and backend frameworks by coding them constantly for the next 8 months.

We might actually get this project done!

Fuck it, I am not going to use any semicolon in my next javascript project.

Boss: I need you guys to give me an estimate on how long this project will take.

Team: We've put a lot of thought into this, and we think we can get it done in 2 months.

Boss: I need it next week.

All those developers complaining about how at their new job there is no source control process, no ci, no CD, no code reviews, no coding standards, no effective project management, next time maybe try asking some questions during the interview stage 🤔

Remember you are interviewing the company as much as they are interviewing you.

Product name: K.I.D.

Product version: v2

Project duration: 9 months

Deployment to LIFE ETA: within next 24 hours

Tests' status: GREEN

uuhhhh soooo exciting! Hopefully this time deployment tools do not fail, like they did when releasing v1. Thanks God it still ended well.

This moment when you finish the project. All done! Yeah! Ok, what’s next dude?

When you stay up late doing a personal project the night before a workday -- knowing damn well you're going to be too tired to do anything the next day -- and have no one to blame but yourself 😁

Until today, I haven’t worked on a react app or front end project in about 5 months.

Hoooo boy. What a fucking rollercoaster ride. One minute you’re doing some slick shit you learned how to do from working on backend projects, the next you’re screaming at your linter and pissing on your keyboard.

2/5 stars do not recommend.

I’m out.

*ascends into the cloud*

Worst Project: Project Managers that don't trust their team.

Our PM before didn't want the developers included in the client meetup because she said the developers wouldn't understand anything in the meeting.

A month after the proposed deadline after, I free up my time (I'm handling different projects), and I decide to speak with the client to see where thing went south.

Apparently, what our PM promised/understood is far off from what the client wanted.

The project was a simple "show the drivers where they need to go next" mobile app while she promised a "Traveling Salesman Problem"-esque solution.

When you sit down to work on a project and you just can't figure it out. Next thing you know it's 3am, so you clamber into bed. Nodding off, nice and cosy when suddenly: What's that brain? You've figured it out?

My next project will disable "Reply All" in all email clients.

Next time my wife falls asleep on the couch, I am not going to play Battlefield, I'm going to work on my side project...

Yes I am...
Yes I am...
... Probably...
🤔

When you work on a side project intoxicated and look at the dev comments the next day.

Our project schedule is quite full at the moment, we are basically at the limit for the next three months.

In comes one of our sales people: "Hey, can we squeeze in a little project, nothing fancy just a very basic static web page." (No question mark there, it was not a question...)

I say no, we are full, the deadline is to tight (3 weeks), can't do it.

In comes boss: "Sure you can, just push everything else back." (We won't change deadlines, what he actually means is for us to do unpaid overtime for two months so he can barocke make a few thousand extra bucks...)

So I cave and allow it. It were just 4 hours of work, we can squeeze it in, maybe do a little less R&D this month.

Next day, the project scope changed, suddenly we are not taking about 4 hours but 80. Sure, we can squeeze two extra weeks into the month.

That is when I realized, I don't hate my work, just my work environment.

3 hours making this beautiful circuit to test stepper motors.
Arduino nano + L293D + pot
Fucking bitch has a short circuit somewhere and can't find it out...
Made the same project in a breadboard in 15 minutes and it's working.
Fuck hardware bugs.
Cutted in the middle of all connections, took out excess solder... Nothing.
Fuck it, moving to the next ideia

yay! Almost done learning basics Nodejs REST :D

Now time to learn how to make gitlab auto build and test, then new features to my little project

Next in line:
Testing UI in React Js/Native T_T

Goals for 2018:
0. Finish some side projects
1. Take python skills to the next level
2. Start a new bigger project.
3. Dive into machine learning

Best 2017: that’s a tie:
- refinding devRant and feeling like this is the place I was missing from my life!
- getting to the end of the year with a stable and complete project, bring on next years insanity!

Worst: still working ( minor routine tasks ) during my annual leave!

Client: we are using Scrum. Next week we have sprint review organized by the project manager.
Me: it’s not Scrum.
Client: in the next sprint we work on a mockup not releasable in production.
Me: it’s not Scrum.
Client: sprint backlog is changed again, at the end we must do everything that is written in the contract with that fixed amount of money.
Me: definitely not Scrum.
Client: we are using Scrum.
Me: Ok.

Boss: We should use Adobe ColdFusion for our next project
Me: Why?
Boss: Because it's the only programming language that can generate PDF. In our next project we will be generating a lot of PDF receipts on daily basis
Me: Oh no!

So glad monday is my last day at my job.

Got a message from mgmt through teams chat today, to paraphrase: we are making our awful time entry system even worse. We are switching to microsoft projects next week for all project. So you'll need to enter in your company wide time sheet with 40 hrs every week, separated by project, then go to a seperate url for each project you work on and enter in the hours you worked on for each individual task given to you by the project manager. There will be no way of easily seeing that the hours in microsoft projects add up to equal the hours entered into the company wide time sheet.

Confession: I'm launching a major project for a client this time next week. It's some of the worst code I've ever written in my entire life. It's beyond awful, but I have no choice. It's sure going to be fun fixing it for the next 2 weeks post launch.

You've got to be a masochist to be a javascript/typescript developer.

Each time I come back to the npm-related parts of my project, the application won't start because of some dependencies nonsense. And I know for sure I left the project working perfectly last time.

Every time... every fucking time! Just leave the project unattended for a week and be sure you'll find it dead next time.

I mean I as a developer don't really have to do ANYTHING for my code to break.

How can people love javascript is a mystery to me.

Boss: "wow how it happened it's already November? Well, here is this project that we supposed to end on October that I didn't mentioned yet, sorry I was sure last month was September. Don't make any plans for next few weekends, ok?"

!$rant

So I'm getting closer to finishing my devrant-widget project but ran into an issue because some people use emojis in their about, skills, website, etc *cough @alice.. cough* and well.. it creates internal server errors because emojis dont magically convert themselves xD But I think I found a fix. On to the next bug.

After like half of a year crunch, when I was working 10-12 hours a day and no one was paying for overtime I was finally moved to next project. We are working in a field where everyone is completely new to it, except me BUT I didn't admit to that. I complete tasks faster while taking remaining time back!

Team estimated a huge feature with 60 days. Made a prototype in a day, implemented it in the project the next day. Code looks a lot cleaner than a previous similar solution.

Now it’s 90% done. Should have worked with 2 other people. Oh well, sorry not sorry for that teamwork.

Just came up and outlined my next personal project... at 5am...

Anyone else solve technical problems while in bed?

Nearly amputated my middle finger by smashing it with heavy armoured door. Blood popped and splashed everywhere, as if I smashed a well fed mosquito mid-july. The nail is broken across the bottom. Finger is swolen to twice the size.

Looks like I'm gonna have a fun start on the new project next week...Unable to code 😁

Yay, my sister is going to Mongolia next week from Infosys as a project lead in Finacle. (a banking product)

Attendance at the daily standup [related to a project that hasn't even started yet] is mandatory!
What did you work on yesterday?
An unrelated project.
What are you working on today?
An unrelated project.
What are you working on for the next 3-6 months?
You guessed it: An unrelated project.
Any blockers?
This is interfering with an unrelated project, but when Agile says "jump", you say "how high?"!

Company wants me to give a rough estimate of developing a new feature in a distributed legacy monolit. They told me they would inform me the next day and want the estimate on the same day for a project that will probably take 2 devs 3-4 months. I ask for more time and info, give the estimate and they say it "feels too much". I mean ok. Then why am I even estimating? If in the first place the client has only X money than do the project for X and it doesn't really matter how much work it is, does it?

I just had my first "Group project"-experience and holy fucking shit am I about to explode right now.

I messaged you one fucking week before the project is due and ask for your input that none of you contributed to and if that was too advanced for you imbeciles to handle then HOW THE HELL ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE THREE MORE FUCKING YEARS IN CS. THEN YOU HAVE THE DECENCY TO RESPOND SIX FUCKING HOURS AFTER THE PROJECT IS DUE AND COMPLAIN ABOUT THE WORK.

WELL GUESS WHAT YOU FUCKING WASTE OF MOLECULES, I ALREADY TURNED IT IN AND THE ONLY REGRET I HAVE IS PUTTING YOUR FUCKING NAMES ON THE PROJECT.
I DRAGGED YOUR SORRY ASSES TO THE FINISH LINE AND THEN YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO ASK "WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG"?

NEXT TIME AT LEAST HAVE THE COURTESY TO SPIT BEFORE YOU FUCK SOMEONE OVER

So the next O’rly book I can imagine for this project is:

How did I ended in this microservices nightmare?

Update on ConsoleWidgets project:

Unit system is done, and much improved from the last project. Included a new class which mimics the CSS "calc()" - allowing you to mix pixel (Or, in console terms, cell) values and percentage values. The screenshot shows 100% - 10c

Color system in functional! In the screenshot you see the aforementioned widget colored devRant light purple! Not to mention retaining the original transparent color for the window background.

Next up: style class (maybe) and layout management classes (for sure!)

this will be included in every of my next project, definitely xD

I gave my project manager a prototype of the ocr app we're developing to play with, just for fun. The next morning, I enter the office to see this along with a well structure spreadsheet with some 40 columns.

Never underestimate the seriousness of a project manager.

Project Managers who stand next to you whilst you are attempting to patch a critical issue

> be new in a big-ish company
> be working next to a senior dev, who's been working on The Project for 5 months now (15 yrs in company)
> be asked for halp
> senior dev didn't know how to use git push
GIT PUSH
> be Joe's terminally flaccid dick

Using Dropbox for my next project!

I don't know which is worse:

1. My project manager telling me that I will have to make a whole project on my own within a month (frontend, backend, etc etc) for our major client and if I make it, we will get a bigger project for a longer period or
2. The colleague next to me being loud (speaking to himself, chewing things) at random intervals.

Finally, I finally managed to grade this year using my own project. We're going to make a personal project that will give us enough to reach the next year. It's so much better than doing those shitty school-forced projects...

There was a project discussed and the agreed deadline was 4 months. And the next morning we got an email that we need to deliver that in a week with absolutely no change in requirements.

Working on Sunday because deadline is next week.
P.S. We got project yesterday.... Wish me luck.....

Picture a small product team, the dev side of it has 1 tech lead, 1 recently promoted senior dev, 1 junior dev.

1 - Offer your tech lead a severance package
2 - Hire a mid-level and a junior dev
3 - Give the product lead role to someone in their mid-20s that has no tech or project management background
4 - ???

The next 6 months are going to be interesting ones...

Yesterday hr called me for a meeting 1 on 1 that lasted for over 1 hour.

Me: i work on my side project when i get home every day

Hr: ohhh.. so you do have time to work on another project aside from ours?

Me: what? I said i work at my project after work when i come hom-

Hr: so you have that much free tim ok how about this. Would you like to work on another project for our clients? So you'd be working on 2 projects-

Me: ...

Hr: one day you work on this primary project the next day you work on the secondary project

---

Corporate people really think giving me MORE work with NO increase of payment is a REWARD???? Go FUCKV yourselves

me: Hey. This looks like a cool component that will save me lots of time and effort in the project I'm kicking off next week.

/* Two months later */

me: WTF was the name of that component that did that thing?

======================

I really should write things down more often.

Boss yelled at lead mobile dev for low productivity because the project manager present him wrong timetables and added accidentally one more week of work.

Next day boss yelled at the lead mobile dev cause the back end wasnt working well.

Project manager and lead back end developer enjoy life! Front is hell :P

I am sitting at Starbucks trying to focus and finish some posts for my side project. The lady at the next table has been loudly 😁talking about her Disney trip in excruciating detail. Do we really have to know she will store her bagel and tuna fish in the hotel room fridge - really!

30 minutes in and she is just getting to the hotel - yikes 😫

No other seats open. I am trapped. Project deliverable delay - reason loud lady.

I was going to do this as a speech to text post but too nice to do that. HELP!

My pm requested me to estimate few tasks on a new project(single page app), the problem was that he was creator of these tasks, so we ended up with

- Create back button
- Create next button
- Create table with contents
... etc

As I prefer to take things literally I estimated each task as they literally should (5 min for adding buttons etc). So all tasks together were estimated for about 5h, while whole project was estimated for 100MD. After few talks and discussions we ended up with:

- Create back button
- Create back button logic
- Create next button
- Create next button logic
etc

!rant

My project is finally officially launched, it is a though and hard move since it's not yet finished.
Now for the next step, i need to find investors to fund our project. We got our publicity from news media, i hope i can get investors attention.

Nonetheless i'm proud from what i've created. I hope this company last

This is one of the picture from local news post about our launching.

you know what i !love?

-project managers that can't manage something as simple as pivotal tracker

-project managers that schedule repeated stakeholder demo sessions when none of my stakeholers show up (ever)

-project managers that hold repeated grooming sessions that no one gives a fuck about because they can't manage what the fuck is going on the current iteration and therfore cannot forecast a proper next iteration

-project managers that complain about what doesn't get done in a current iteration because they don't don't pay attention to high priority stories that are added by developers in the current iteration even though they have (OWN) pivotal tracker

-project managers who have no clue about the business but want to turn grooming sessions into some sort of requirements gathering meeting only so they can appear halfway competent in the stupid little pivotal tracker notes

-cats that can't decide whether they want to go outside or stay inside

i'll take cats. at least their cuddly. sometimes. fuckers.

I've spent my entire day at work planning my next home project. Probably the most productive day I've had at this company!

Just a thought.

If your project has good coverage with tests, it should be possible to develop an algorithm that recreates your production code entirely from tests.

Just look at IntelliJ - its autosuggestions on missing properties/methods are 99% times correct - I only need to hit that ENTER button. Add some AI to recreate some algorithms and there you go - you can use your tests as both: code specs and a part of QA.

Any takers for the next AI project? :)

!rant

Just got a response from a firm I interviewed with for a junior Rails developer position, they want me to work on a demo project as a next part of the interview process.

This might be my first dev position coming through!

My newest BASH project: reactive BASH
:)
Yes, I do like shell THAT much!

Since today my bhttp lib supports STOMP [still need to work on 1.2 compliance], i.e. I can carry out live communication with MQ. Meaning I can script the whole thing, be it 5 calls 5 reads, be it 20 subscriptions and reacting to unlimited number of messages in either of them with separate actions. WITHOUT A FOREST OF IF-ELSEs OR CASE-ESACs!!!

Boi do I love shell scripting... :D

Next project: AI in BASH

I just finished up an absolute cesspool of a project. I was seriously reconsidering a career change to something less stressful, like welding on a high-rise building, or capturing Somali pirates.

Next project is supposed to be a walk in the park, and probably still will be.

MGR: You're starting a new project next week. Prismic for the CMS, and NextJS.
ME: Oh, okay, cool. Well, let me get up to speed on Prismic and Next since I haven't used either of those.
Spent some time last week - easy enough, nothing really new/ground breaking here.

Sprint 0.5 Kick off meeting today
MGR: By the way, we're still using Prismic for the CMS, but we're gonna go ahead and use Gatsby instead of Next.
Me: ... *facepalm

Spent 20h working non stop on a project we were presenting to customer on the next day. Had a shower at 6 am and drove to the client with a colleague. We were presenting the features one by one. As he was presenting I was finishing the missing features and we switched every couple of minutes. Never again working for a company that sets deadlines on the first meeting with customer

When you are switching teams and seems like everyone in the firm knows your next project except for you..

I'm an intern that is almost never going in class, because I've nothing to learn from this school, learnt today I've a java jee project to do for next week, i actually know nothing about it .

My group to do it ? Me, and a « I'm a manager i do not code »

when you are done with your job and thinks about a project for startup yet you still go back to office the next day :P

so this client asked me to build a fully functional financial education app for kids that she needed to present as a project in the next two days...

I did attempt it and it felt good but failed to meet the deadline cos I almost died

That feeling, when you finished a learning project, and now don't know what to code next -.-

1. Get an idea
2. Plan the structure to use overengineered solutions
3. $ git init
4. Setup the barebones
5. $ git commit -am "initial commit"
6. Forget the project for the next several months, until another idea pops out and you visit your github to setup a repo for the new project and rediscovers this miserable project's repo
7. Back to 1, repeat

GAME
The nickname of a person above your comment will be the name of your next project, tell us what it's about (be creative)

All devs in the company are booked 120% until late summer. Boss just sold another 6000 hours cloud project to kick off in 2 weeks. I’m the PM, and my colleagues will hate me for this thinking that it’s my fault they have to work their asses off for the next 5 months!

Happy birthday to my self. Away from my family and friends, alone in the city alone in the office pushing keys on keyboard to deliver the project.

It's been very difficult year for me, both physically and mentally.

I hope next year will be better than this.

Fuck you 2019.

PS: birthday and end year selfish.

(Java) Last year in programming class my teacher gave me a example project he had made. Looked through it found problems, fixed them. The next I had programming class I showed it to him. He were really cross about it and gave me a semi bad grade. After some time he told me I was right, and changed my grad.

Once I was totally exhausted and fatigued doing code...

Then i had cappuccino....

The next thing i saw was my complete project.

Today we kick off the project with the client, it's due in 3 months but client ask me if I can "feed the virtual machine" and "set up a website to preview the final result" for next Monday...

Just me. Working on my next coding project.

My face when PM checks the project day before the deadline and list down time consuming changes that needs to be completed the next day (Deadline day) before 10:00AM.

My ex boss , keep interrupting the project I was leading.. and half way through . He decided to make a huge db redesign just to disagree with me.
Simply I didn't go to office the next day and never since !

Pulled an all nighter for a project, the next thing i know i am demonstrating my code with the error message i forgot to change which was houston we got a problem, i felt so weird and i was laughing very hard after the project presentation

this morning i felt so inspired and very productive so i finished the whole project in a few hours! they posted the pdf file explaining what the program should do and i just told myself "im going to start doing it before class so i can ask if i have questions later." but in the end i finished it all on my own so i am so proud of myself!

p.s. it's supposed to be submitted in December so i guess i have more free time or maybe i'll do the next project which will be submitted next year and be more advanced 😃

I've seriously learned more about programming in 2 months at my internship then I did in 2 years on my own

So glad my high school gave me this opportunity. But currently I'm bored because I can't start the next step of my project yet. -_- So bored

Project Manager logic (the best kind).

PM: Here are a list of the tickets we need to address next.

Architect: Hang on, didn't X raise a number of critical bugs yesterday? They were serious, we need to fix the critical bugs first.

PM: ... but he marked them all as critical

(so that means they aren't an issue? cool, i've been doing this wrong all my life)

So I had this classmate of mine and we agreed to be partners in a project.

She told me she'll take care of the project and let me just do my other stuffs.

We had the highest grade for the project presentation and she boasted how she made that project of ours to the class.

Some students from other class wants to have a copy of our project as their reference (since our class is the first to present) but my partner declined to give them some. She said it was her who made the project from the scratch.

I had my friends from other class and I decided to help them. We had our overnight the next day searching for at least the concept of our project and guess what?

I stumbled upon a certain site and found the source code of our project. Her code and the code from the site are almost the same!

Think she just changed the variable name HAHAHAHA

Me: "there's a fatal crash in the build that has gone to testing, this is how we fix it"
Project lead: "they haven't noticed yet, add the feature the boss wants"
Next day, boss:"testing found a fatal crash this morning and couldn't do any testing because of it, how'd it get past you?!"

Being forced to learn Angular for a project, then as my confidence kept growing those same guys said "actually, we are not going to use any Angular, vanilla Javascript will be enough".

PS: months later those same guys: "Hey, maybe you could learn Angular 2 for our next project". We never worked together again :/

Does anyone else have those little bouts of creativity and interest where you work on a project of your own 24/7, and then when you finish it you don't know what to do for the next however long?

Participating in a non-profit project related to corona outbreak. It should help thousands of people to say at home, have a peace of mind and stay healthy.

Our project should go Live this/next week and we already have a blessing from our government. They are already making some legal exceptions to us.

That feels good!

Project due next Wednesday, spends all day Friday drinking beer and playing Mario Kart Double Dash....

My codes compiling.

Talking about PM, I'm still not sure whether we have one in our company. The project is managed directly by a senior engineer.

If we have any question about the doc, UI/UX team sits just next to us. We even have conversations on how to proceed the project to make us more comfortable.

I don't know aboit the others. But for me, this is sweet.

Lead developer about Project X:

“Focus on responsiveness. That will probably take you the rest of the week”

The next day:

“Focus on functionality Y”

MAKE UP THAT MIND FFS?!

@dfox my inspiration for my next personal project: see the bottom photo :)

Found my next personal project with docker, redis ... only thing missing is time :(

Last Thursday, project owner insisted that the module I was working on to be ready for testing this Monday(though the supposed deadline is next week).
Went to work on a day off to deliver it as requested. Monday came. Monday went. No testing started. Project owner was on leave.
Now he's asking if we can start with the testing.
Hope I have laser beam eyes so I can toast him. -_-

He: Is there a list of what you want to do next?
Me: To be drowned
Me: Hang yourself
Me: Oh, or are you talking about the project?

Emailed my PM a new project spec, the next morning he emails me back saying, to stop wasting time and get back to "real" work.

A few days later we had a Skype meeting with senior management and the PM who rejected the spec to go over that same spec document among other projects, everyone agrees it's a good idea including the PM :D

FML.

!Rant

CTO: "We have a project that is the top most priority get it done"
CTO: "We have some tickets logged for another project get them fixed this is of the highest priority"
CTO: "I want a new feature in another project I want this done now It is top priority!"
Next day, Client comes in CTO shows him around
CTO: "You are still working on this!"

... Arg, its as if the guy thinks giving something a top priority gets it done instantly

I cannot work on my personal project this weekend.. because the fucking IT team gave me a fucking mac charger yesterday and it fuckin stopped working today.. FUCKING waste of a weekend!!!!

I guess I will be gaming for the next 48 hours.. on my windows PC..

(And please don't say Linux Rocks in the comments coz I had to work on an iOS app..)

Day 1 - Monday:
Manager: How far did you go on this project?

Me: I have contacted the PM, and due to lack of data we are putting the project on hold since there is nothing we can work with, we expect to get the data next week. Peter is working on obtaining required data.

Manager: I see, okay.

Day 2 - Tuesday:
Manager: How for did you go on this project?

Believe it or not this happened again on Thursday... fml

You're working on a project, your boss has set you tasks to complete. You complete all the tasks and make pull requests of all the work you've done. Your boss is busy and you don't know what to do next? What do you do? Is it unethical to work on personal projects in work hours, because you're not being paid for that? How do you find other stuff to do?

Anyone know what Safe Agile is?

We're doing project interval planning for next 2 days.... aka long meetings about good knows what...

To me it sounds like bullshit bureaucracy.... because you can't have Safe anything with a team full of monkeys...

That or I just don't like change and giving up control... Or sitting I didn't meetings all day... Especially since I'm deaf and the captions suck...

During my first project in one of the SQLite statements I didn’t realize that it needed single quotes since I was new to it. So I brushed that off but when working on the next function for the program 8 hours were dedicated to debugging to only realize that the error was caused because I forgot the fucking single quotes. FUCK

Started doing deep learning.
Me: I guess the training will take 3 days to get about 60% accuracy
Electricity: I dont think so! *Power cut every day lately
My dataset: I dont think so! *Running training only achieve 30% of learning accuracy and 19% of validation accuracy

Project submission: next week
😑😑😑

I am going to an AI conference in Berlin (which is kinda far away from me) next month.

I am just learning AI & ML and integrating them into a personal project, but I am going there to meet people, learn and gather info.

Do you have any advice on how I could network with people that are masters in this area?

I have this bad habit of starting projects that are way out of my league after getting ridiculously over-ambitious ideas.

”Yeah, let me just do this <insert ambitious project in an area of programming I know next to nothing about> with <insert languge I’ve never written a line with before>. It’ll be fine...”

Live deployment next week Monday but Product Owner really need this new fix in.

Can you code, push to test, test it, push to acceptance test, UAT it before Friday...

It's Wednesday today 😐

Project manager says ok 😱

You come to work 2 hours early to continue a project that needs to launch next Friday.

40 minutes later you're still eating breakfast and browsing DevRant.

The coding hour has already hit and the day hasn't even started.

when the project manager asks you if you have an ETA on the project you're trying to finish because deadline is a few hours. You have never done the thing you're trying to complete before so you have no baseline for it and they know that.... nope but you'll be the 2nd person to know when it's done, maybe next time don't promise deadlines without consulting the devs?

Working a local community site. Used the project to pick up on Vue.

Next I wanna check out what's all the fuss with flutter. Also I am in the process of reverting back to rails after spending 2y writing php

Rant

I was given a project to lead and develop with 2 other team members by the co-founder, I was told that I will need to deliver an initial demo within 30 days, 20 days in the project and I was told yesterday that they need a final release ready within the next 10 days !! Not just that but the co founder decided to assign one of my team members to another project!!!

I've worked today till 4am.

Guess who's working from home in the morning!

My next project is a functional fitness/crossfit application and my client requires me to attend and participate sessions with them in order for me to understand and appreciate the sport. I got the point but OMG I only know sports via tv,youtube,etc.. and not really fun of socializing. I might die doing this project. Help me!

Final day on this project, tonight I'll get drunk to forget about the backlog since client didn't hire me longer ( consultant).

I hate leaving unfinished code.

Monday I start my next project, which is refactoring. .Net code to .net core.

Here is to hoping it doesn't rely too much on unsupported 3rd party libraries.

Cheers fellow devs, have a good weekend.

what's my next language to learn? So far I only know powershell. I don't need it for any big project, just some small games to learn the language. I'm thinking of python or c#.

!rant
made a first update to my game, its live and running. probably gonna do one more and move on to the next project.

One project deadline coming up, one presentation to be given next week, and 3 exams on consecutive days.
Scared as fuck. 😭
I hope I pass.
Wish me luck!

Company hires an intern with Java experience to "help" with the back end of a simple project. Waste the next week trying to teach them what a RESTful web API is. Intern doesn't come back.

Reminder, include legal language in next project that says if we're using JIRA then we're using JIRA and not a thousand emails with requirements embedded in spreadsheets and PowerPoints.

"I want you do this *extremely vaguely described task* for our next project. Can you think for less than 30 seconds and give me an estimate?"

Just wanted to update you guys on the status of the weather app i was working on.

I have decided to stop working on it for the time being but might return to it at a later date.

The decision was in part due to it being a fairly generic idea in a already saturated market.

Thanks for the support however and hope my next project will be as well received.

The worst guy I worked with: Ex Military from USA, psychopath creating SaaS, B2B solution. The business idea was good and also got funding. He was so fucking racist.

When I joined his project there were 4 developers already working for him. One by one they all leave. I worked for the first 3 months taking over all the project.

Between the next 3-4 months I onboard 10-15 different developers and do knowledge transfer for all 10-15. Nobody works with him for more than 2 weeks.

He wants to developer do fucking 4 hours of meeting each day, repeating the same thing each time and expecting 8 hours of output. hire 3 project managers in 6-8 months. each one left.

I also told him i want to leave the project. By different ways he manages to keep me approx. 1 year. At end I told him this is my last month find another developer, So I can hand over the project. He was not able to find one. I leave the project he fucked up my profile.

Till date he has been looking for a developer, even trying to onboard developers in profit sharing.

Programmer friend: Dood, do this and this and show it to me, I'll say if it's good.
Me (noob): Okay, sure.

*next week*

F: So why did you stop coding?
M: Why do you think so?
F: You didn't show me your project in a week.
M: I was lazy?
F: LAZY?!?!

I got reassigned to save a project, I’m not happy about the next 16 day death march.

I'm definitely gonna plan and design my next side project before coding it...

...nah I don't need plans!

Accidently created a folder called "assets" next to my "Assets" folder, deleted it from MonoDevelop and instead it deleted both of the folders... irrecoverably...

Maybe spent about a year on that project and I lost 6 months progress...

Like how did it even manage to delete my folder irrecoverably?!?!

Yes ! Just copy paste an entire fucking react dashboard into our NextJs project !

But don't stop there mate. Fuck up your branch and mine too to a point even gitkraken can't tell me exactly what fucking operations you did.

This is my first Next project and my first time working with this new client and it's going tits up in less than a month. Fucking great job.

I know some C++. What should I really learn next Python or Java?
I want to be able to make a meaningful project as soon as possible.(with Java as I can see I have SpigotPlugins, and with Python I have Telegram Bots).
Sorry for asking for advice here but idk what to do.

Demoing our product at the customer's site by remoting into one of our internal environments. Their internet is slow so product looks slow.

Project manager after the demo: hey, next time, think of yourself as the tech lead, not just the software lead. Next time hop into the command prompt and do whatever you guys do, check the bandwidth or something.

Me biting my tongue: so I can tell you the customer's internet is too slow?

I think for my next project I will give my classes and variables interesting names, so when anyone views the source - they can be entertained.

Working from home working on the company project. The working time ends and i just switch projects for the next 6-7 hours... and i am happy with this

Android app team project at school. We were creating a vocab trainer app. I did all the work my partner did literally no programming. So I asked her to at least copy some vocab list from our book. I didn't hear anything from her that day. The next day at school she comes to me with a piece of paper in her hand: "Is it ok like that?"

I died

A few months ago I lost my laptop that had my school project and our start-up projects. Hadn't learned about version control by then. I had a rough time explaining to the time where the projects were as they were due in a weeks time. Spent the next 5 days rewriting the project. It came out more neater and faster than the previous one :)

Boss:"I need you to help your colleague finish up this java project, but you still have to meet your deadline on web app you're working on and we have an ecommerce website that needs to enter first phase next week".
Me:"la la la la la..."

Gonna start to learn everything I can about Networking Programming. I’ve always wanted to do stuff that requires it so I’m gonna do it. **Also foreshadowing my next project**

> after a week, finally up the project to angular2 rc5
> happyasfuck.jpg
> next day to go angular github.
> rc6
> CHANGELOG.md#breaking-changes

1. Get that senior-appropriate raise
2. Build a real ML project
3. Learn web assembly and get to the next level in web dev

Spends months on a clearly laid out project. Finally gets to the end.
"Great stuff, well done - now let's start the next section of it"

"...the what now?"

Last week, my project manager said that next Wednesday (today), we should have a meeting in person... Take a guess who is working from home

Just finished my first microservice project. I'm so happy that I was able to do that hardest thing I ever did. It's just a side project but I think it will do well on my cv as I will be finishing university next year.
Just wanted to share this with you guys as all the rants really helped me to calm down when I was wrecking my head over some weird bugs.

- Seriously, I should do some work in my senior project.
- (looks at code and stares for an hour)
- I'm hopeless
- (go to sleep)

Repeat next day

When you have a ml project review the next day but can't find a data set that suits your needs 🙈.

!Worst, being put on the project a day before release

!Best, finding and fixing all the data model issues before release, so that the next time I have to pull stats about the system, everything actually makes sense, as all foreign keys and indexes would be explicitly defined for once.

Stuck between choosing Angualrjs or React for the next project. Have not used React before though.

The project started as a series of individual prototypes. The client the wanted a beta app for a few selected clients, and someone had the great idea of just merging the prototypes into a single app. The attitude of the devs was always "whatever, this will be rebuilt for public release"

Over one year later, and after many different developers touched the project, the client wants it to go live, there was never a rebuild, and there won't be one until a few months after it goes live, and the project is buggier than it ever was.

A rebuild would have been quicker and safer than fixing the huge backlog of bugs, still the client won't accept a rebuild.

A few people already quit over this project and I think I will be the next one to hand in my resignation.

Group project meetings in uni. All of them. Noone ever speaks and you're trying to suggest ideas. Noone disagrees with you and when it's time for the next meeting, apparently everyone just did their own thing.. fml

Just realized I don't have a code style. In python at least I stick to what flake8 tells me, but with C++ I change my style every project I work with to adapt to their existing code base, and then I keep that style untill the next project.

Current project is an ns-3 module, and their code style is quite horrible but I'm already making it a part of me.

I had a project idea for creating my own cloud service based on DO spaces. Today I started.

Had the webapp done in several hours and it's already deployed. Next step: the mobile app. I tried out Flutter and I have to say, for beta it's really good! So I'll work with Flutter for the mobile app.

Excited dev here!

I shot myself in the foot again!!

These incident usually happen at restless night.

Some night I become too restless so I do what any programmer would do, I program.

The "novel" idea just come up and I code until I become too tired. I usually finish the prototype of the project before I fell asleep.

I usually found out that I have reinvent the wheel the next morning! Great. My "novel" idea is not too "novel" after all.

It is hard to find the novel project these day since it is too hard to beat the decade of collective intelligence of programmer.

My goal for 2020: actually finish a personal project.

Last year, I built 25% of a website, 10% of a companion app for a video game, and half of a command-line utility. I would really like to finish an entire project this year, but considering that I just started a new project that promises to be huge and unwieldy, that will probably have to wait for whatever project I try next after burning out on this one.

Well, first off I want to actually pass my college classes. You know, the classes I barely find interest in that seem to be very minimal in my coding skills.
Next, take up or join a project for the summer. You know, get my name out there.
Third, make money
Fourth, make something significant in the OSdev community. I absolutely love low-level dev. Now (to myself) Let's do this!

Have my project done 80%...
feeling relaxed and positive for the next 20% :)

Recently, I had a discussion with my HR that
Can I use python for my next project.

She replied:- "Sorry, we don't allow pets in the office."

*Perks of working in a cross industry.

I worked for 16 hours straight without any break because client kept me on call with screen sharing on and asked me to solve all the bugs from last 6 months of coding because he wanted to go live next day.🤕
Ps: I was the only developer and the only tester of that project.

Project deadline next 2 months but they didn't try to communicate with devs. Surprise mothaaa ffffff!!!

Just created a new project folder. Dropped it into the filing cabinet right next to the folder i already created for this project. Son of a bitch.

Dev planning
- set timeline for feature for 2 weeks
- share timeline with everyone involved
- project manager calls and says it's taking too long
- dev adjusts timeline to 1 week
- project manager call next day asks for a new feature to be included in the 1 week timeline

What the f*** is wrong with these ppl. People don't seem to get the concept of schedules, timelines and organizing work. It's not like there is an abundance of resources (only few devs available ) with limited budget and salaries

Started to look at October CMS. Looks like I'm going to dish WordPress on our next project!

I hate when you finish a project, and have no idea what to work on next! I despise feeling so idle!