If you are using a FREE software and you don’t like it
You have 3 options:
- Stop using it,
- create your own,
- or simply, SHUT THE FUCK UP

You get the right to complain about what I build IF AND ONLY IF you paid for it.

Hope this is clear!!!

At Job interview.

Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Me: I see myself as the leader of a raider group, robbing and scavenging together pieces of what is left of the civilization in hopes to build a weapon powerful enough to take the world back from a rogue AI, which I built myself few years earlier.

Interviewer: What!?

Me: What?

Someone at Google: how do we make Android build times quicker?

Someone else at Google: we could make a new button next to Run and call it 'Instant Run' and give it an awesome lighting bolt icon!

First someone: what will it do differently?

Second someone: nothing 😎

Client: Can you build a Snapchat clone but better?

Me: I’m going to say probably not logical given the resources they have and what we have, but for curiosity, what kind of budget do you have?

Client: $2500.

Me: Get out.

When your delivery manager is the stupidest fuckin manager ever born :/

"If you have android code ready then why can't you create iPhone build unh - since A=B, B=C so 'C' SHOULD EQUAL TO 'A' right - so use android code and create iPhone build TOMORROW - don't change the code just create a build in 2 hours and then work on xyz project for other 6 hours since its in HIGH priority"

WHAT THE FUCKIN FUCK..
MY DICK = YOUR FACE MOTHERFUCKER :///

I'm an experienced developer, in my facebook I liked all the pages about programming languages and developing, but Facebook keeps advertising me "the book to learn how to code in 24 hours" or "the tutorial to build a website without paying a developer" or the one in the image below.

What the fuck facebook? Are you trying to say I'm useless?

"Git is useless, connect to the server and edit the pages" - My boss, 2019

And beleive it or not, he's also a teacher. What a great and wise man, we should build a statue for him!

Always wanted to build a URL shortener. Guess what I'm building right now :D (next to working on a blog article)

Somehow this is making me very happy 😊

Trying to explain my job to friend who don't know computers.

Friend: So what do you do?
Me: Well they call me a "DevOps Engineer", but really I am just a Release or Automation Engineer.
Friend: What is that?
Me: Well I assist developers build and deploy their code as well as write code to automated the whole process and build the virtual servers.
Friend: So you like program?
Me: Kinda...
Friend: Dude can you write an app for me, got some ideas!
Me: (blinks) no.

We have no more time for all this Agile stuff!

Half of our developers might have been injured when we built the Great Wall of China, but no worries, we've listened to your complaints about feeling overworked!

You can take 3 extra days off this year. Meanwhile, we're starting the next project.

We're building some pyramids.

What? You want Scrum and sprints? Sure, do sprints, whatever helps us build those pyramids!

Requirements? Refinements? What requirements are there to refine?

We require a giant pyramid.

For v1, you can build the foundation out of wet mud. It must be 500 meters. Wide, or high, we're not sure yet, we'll get back to you on that. It must have less than 4 sides, but certainly more than 3.

The Frontend team has already built a part of the entrance using 60 semi trucks filled with papier-mâché, pipe cleaners and glitter.

Now go build already!

How a regular convo with non-devs usually go:

"So what do you do?"

"I'm a software developer."

"Oh, so you're like... a hacker?"

"No, I build apps."

"Nice! So like facebooks and stuff???"

"Not exactly. Different things, mostly tools. It depends."

"Ooh...cool...Like what?"

*proceeds to spend what feels like an hour trying to explain what I do for a living in the simplest terms, while the person just blankly stares and nods, pauses, then finally tells me their crazily infeasible app idea.*

"So whadaya think?"

"Hmm...sounds good 😀👍"

It's really funny to build a PHP based RSS feed generator when, this morning, I hardly knew what RSS even was 😆

Client: I want you to build me something, I'm not sure jet what is is exactly but it is supposed to be round and be able to fit on a car.

Me: you mean a wheel ?

Client: noooo, this is completely different and original idea like none has ever had.

I gave lift to an old man. Starting the conversation
He: what do you do?
Me: I am a software engineer
He: Nice....... where do you get the material to build a software?
Me: mmmmm google or stackoverflow
He: maybe they are new in market, never heard of them

User:
I wish I could build an app like XYZ that is so cool.🥺🥺

XYZ Developer:
I wish I could build an SDK like Agora.io that is so cool.😣😣

Developer at Agora.io:
I wish I could build CDN like Akamai. That is so cool.🤔🤔

Developer at Akamai:
I wish I could have layed Internet as a concept. That is so cool.😢

Conclusion: Don't disparage yourself as a Developer. Sometimes, we should Appreciate what we have build rather than what we wish to build.

Be proud of the Product "X" you are building.
Just look around, you will find a person wishing to build a product like "X".🤗

#developer #motivation #developers #agora #motivation

Once a friend came to me asking for help building an app, I asked him what his idea was and he said, "It's an app that builds apps! Think about it, people could just tell it what kind of app they want and it could build anything for them automatically! Can you believe no one has done this?"

On Windows machine
Me: login as admin. Cool i have admin rights now.
Me: Open's gitbash.
$ react-native run-android.
Error: cannot create some folder.
Build failed.

Ok. Maybe i should right click and select run as administrator.

Again
$ react-native run-android
Error: cannot delete some folder
Build failed.

What? Again?

Ok one more time.

$ react-native run-android
Error: cannot create some folder.
Build failed.

F**k this shit.

Switch to ubuntu.

$ react-native run-android.
Build finished
Installing on device.
Done

Building your own tool board is fun ! This was nice to build. What do you think?

Fuck project setups that

- Have huge nested enterprise folder structures like Java

- Use tons of shell scripts / makefiles

- Have every config file in the root folder

- Don't tell me what I need / how to build

I know some of these can't really be changed easily, but fuck this cluttery mess!

I see all these tools for the past few years claiming...

"build an app without writing code"

Great, if you want to build a prototype and then try to find a technical co-founder who can actually build something.

Otherwise, none of us need another shitty cookie-cutter app.

There is a 0% chance you can build anything that will scale without writing some code. Your best case scenario is you sell it to some sucker who doesn't understand that what they are buying is garbage.

I give those folks 3 options...

1. Find a technical co-founder
2. Learn to build software
3. Fuck off

Thinking you can build a software company without building actual quality software if fucking moronic.

Of course, that won't stop the thousands of business grads each year from trying and saying...

"I have such a great idea, I just need someone to build it"

Let's get things straight. You have nothing. NOTHING! You idea is worthless without execution.

Some former colleague just blatantly commented out units tests I wrote for his build to pass. What the...

My career is going well. I was really prepared for a small inconsequential raise. But my manager literally doubled what I was expecting (was expecting just inflation match). Awesome 😆 now time to rapidly build a real proper emergency fund and my savings faster than ever

Used to build custom computers... Used to get calls from pissed off people that their cup holder was poorly designed and broke off... One guy even called about it a second time... After we explained what this was for and replaced the part.... SMH

Customer: (calls emergency hotline) We have a really bad bug!
Rep: What seams to be the issue?
Customer: I need to talk to Sam, he knows what to do, tell him it's urgent.
Rep: can I tell Sam what the issue is?
Customer: Well, Sam built a newsletter program but I don't have a way to import mass amounts of emails addresses.
Rep: That sounds like a feature, not a problem.
Customer: why wouldn't it do that? Would you build a car without a steering wheel?
Rep: I am not sure that's relevant to the problem.
Customer: what do you mean?
Rep: I would say it is more like, "would you build a car without a pair of jet skis attached to the back." And we would respond with, "we would be happy to add Jet Skis, but it's going to cost you additional money."
Customer: So, how are we going to fix this bug in YOUR software?
Rep: :/

Have knowledge to build anything but no idea what to build.

Worst part of being a developer?

Everyone thinks you want to freelance a website for them...

Even when you're not a web developer

What do you do?

I write software.

Oh so you're good with computers and stuff?

Yeah

That's p sweet, can you build me a site?

No. 😃

Client: Can you build me a custom Wordpress site to look like this WordPress template..
Me: Sure, but why not buy the rights to the template?
Client: I want it custom.
Me: what do you want custom?
Client: the content on all the pages. The template is all in french or something.
Me: kills self.

Some guy: Dude what're you doing?
Me: Making an app.

Goes ahead to ask what an app is, I give him a brief and try to show him some features of my app.

Some guy: So that means you can "make your own" facebook. Why not build something like Facebook or WhatsApp?

Speechless...

Me: junior dev

Assignment: build a REST search service that also does (thing x)

Me: gosh I just can't figure out how to make (thing x) work! Nothing I try works and there are no online resources!

*goes to meeting with client*

Client: (thing x) is impossible in our application, so we are expecting (much more manageable thing)

Me: awesome! I think I can build that

Manager who can't code: what are you talking about, (thing x) is clearly better and it should be possible to do

Manager: *sends email outlining shifted requirements after the meeting, including (thing x)*

Today, I suddenly received a "build error" email for master on a project that I am working on with my grp.
So I panicked and opened the log to see who messed up. This is what I see

On my way to my first c++ course!

Really hyped to see what they make us build!

(as long as it isn't a fucking calculator)

"There needs to be a Home option on the side menu, people won't know to click on the company logo in the top left."

What sort of fucking moron doesn't know that?

"The website is slower to click around than I'd expect."

No shit. Do you remember the part where you said we had to build it in WordPress?

what is the best framework you have used to build an ecommerce application?? (ps-: your ++ will encourage me :-] )

Person: What are you doing for living?
Me: I am a software engineer.
P: what does that mean?
M: we build applications and websites. basically
P: like what?
M: I don't have an example now, but when you open your computer and navigate to a website, we build similar things..
P: ahhaaah, so you make computers
M: no no, *open Facebook on my phone* see this is an application, we made applications that run on devices.
P: so make phones, that's cool
M: nooo!
P: so you do nothing !
M: yes 🙄

Minutes away from Ludum Dare submission closing. Finalizing game build to upload and submit and I get this...!!!

FUCK!

I'm too exhausted to give a shit at this point. Guess I'm out. Still pretty happy with what I managed to make. Had a late start, first LD and I actually managed to make something I guess XD

I'm going to bed T_T

Programmer: We really have to refactor the codebase!

Director: That's not important. Do you think our customer would care what it looks like under the hood if we are selling cars?

One year after...

VP: We need to build a new platform for flexibility!

Director: Let's rewrite!

(developer thing)
I am trying to build code from the last 4 or 4:30 hours at office and she message me

She : it's urgent.. call me

Me : me();

(THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID 🙄)

When your company uses an awesome online software and your bosses want you to rebuild it internally to save money.

Me "OK, but, product A had a team of engineers and probably took a year to build."

Them: "well, they have the bugs worked out then. Shouldn't take you as long. Just copy what they did."

I am building a PC for my first time and thought about every step more than twice. This is going to be my build:

Processor: AMD Ryzen™ 7 2700
Mainboard: X370
RAM: Corsair DIMM 8 GB DDR4-2400
Video card: Zotac NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1050 Ti
SSD: Samsung 960 EVO 250 GB
HDD: Seagate ST1000DM010 1 TB
PSU: PURE POWER 10 | 300W
Case: Aerocool Cylon RGB Midi-Tower - black

What are your opinions on this build?

During interview :
We are going build the next big thing. We are going to use the latest and greatest, now tell me what WCF and SOAP are.

PM: we need to show some progress, lets build a dashboard to display metrics.
Me: what metrics do we use ? The current period?
PM: No, those aren't good. Use math to show we made progress *wink*
Me: .......

WHAT THE FUCK?
CMAKE you pathetic collection of loosely bundled scripts written in a shitty macro language!
WHY? WHY? WHY?
WHY DO YOU REFUSE TO OUT OF SOURCE BUILD?
IT WORKED FINE LIKE 2 SECONDS AGO! I HATE YOU WITH THE FIRE OF A THOUSAND STARS!

Joined a game development Facebook group just for shits and giggles to see what sort of hell I can see on there...

Never have I seen so much broken English or the amount of people asking for help to build a shameless clone for Android just to get money... Really makes you think sometimes...

At many places, first programming course is Python or JavaScript. Our university first teaches C. I feel its a great language to build up programming skills. Tough then formers and that's what makes it more beneficial.

I love that its 2024, and yet sometimes you still have to delete the /bin and /obj folders from a C# project to remove build errors that are in fact, not build errors...

...and people here hate node.js / npm

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

but come on down in the comments all you C# worshippers and please enlighten me what I am doing wrong... definitely couldn't be C# right?

also explain why 'clean' must not REALLY mean clean 🤡

What you see:
"we gonna build a new application to replace our legacy one"

How to read:
"we gonna make you put more shit in the legacy app whenever we want and still keep asking about the new app you don't have the time to make"

"You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do." - Henry Ford

The more time I get to play with Flutter, the more I am enjoying it. Google mentioned in their Udacity course that the best way to learn is to try and build an app that you use daily. So, I spent my Sunday building a UI clone of Facebook.

Are you also trying Flutter? What are your views?

When the people ask about the dificulty to programming.

Me: well depend to the language that you use to build the app.

People: well in spanish?

Me: what(?), programming language, like c, java and others

People: ah, the pc say me that needs java upgrade.

Me: (smile and forget it), look is not superman behind you?.

Becaue you are getting paid really well to build what is essentially virtual LEGO!

Dear boss, client :

We, the developers, have family. Respect our time by knowing what you want us to build beforehand.

I just remembered that when I was a kid, it was really popular to make personal websites with those simple website builders. Wanna know the funny thing? My parents wouldn't let me build my own website. Well look what I'm doing with my life now mom 😂

If I ever start my own company, I'll build it on the basis of people not giving a single fuck about what others might think about them, especially management.

There will be no place for butthurt special snowflakes and predictable egoFucks! (credit to @MrJDev for that one)

*Working on custom magento build*

Project manager:you are taking to long on this project. I know how long it should take to build a web site, I built a way more complicated site than this in just a few hours!

Me: what site did you build?

PM: *sends link to wife's photography site* wife.squarespace.com

Me: ...that's not the same thing at all

Yesterday my docker build started failing for my .NET core project, but it worked on Windows!

Today I found a Github issue, 4 hours old, what fixes it? Downgrading my kernel, which I upgraded a few days ago to v5

I would never have discovered that on my own, what the hell

Why to worry about what to build? I have unlimited time na? I'll think later ☺️

fck you visual studio!!! seriously what is wrong with you?!?
~me peacfully writing some code ~
ok let's see what we did
vs: I can't compile that. The key whateverKey in line 15 is not defined.
me: ok let's investigate...
nowhere in line 15 use whateverKey.... ok....
wait I didn't change that file at all.
~me clicking rebuild solution~
vs: can't build that because of whateverKey in line 15.
me : WTF?!?
checking git diff -> file not changed
me okkkkkkk......
closing visual studio and reopening solution.
Build succeeded.
What the actuall hell?!?
I'm spending way too much time trying to get that shity peace of software to do what it is supposed to do!

Anyone want to build me a smart robot capable of determining what to keep and what to donate (or recycle) so I can stop packing and injuring myself? Would have to me capable of critical thinking and tetrising the shit out of stuff and boxes...

I'm only partially joking... would buy a packing robot pretty damn quickly

Find what you want to build. Watch some videos. Code. Grab some books. Code. Find some friends to code. Code.
And learn some theory to improve your code. Code.

Get a job. Code. Get paid.

Boss: we need to standardize the CMS we use.

Me: well 90% of what we build are custom Wordpress deployments...

Boss: yeah but Wordpress is best suited for all our clients.

Me: well yeah, I know...we could use Django or Rails and give the clients more customized solutions...

Boss: yeah but not all of our developers know those frameworks, and they require maintenance...

Me: -_- we could really use Jekyll for most sites we build

Boss: yeah, but what about our clients that want a blog?

Me: ...we can build a blog with anything...

Boss: ...we just need to standardize what we use.

I have couple dev ambitions some of them are:
- to become better in what I am doing and get a higher position.
- to build my own product.
- to educate young programmers.

Working with a new team and I don't understand how this is normal or ok.

Me: Does anyone need help troubleshooting the broken build or can I revert this change that broke it so I can push my change out?

Dev: Stop build shaming me, I wouldn't leave the build in a failing state.

Me: Well, I wasn't sure how long to wait, before asking.... it's been broken for 4 hours.

Dev: It's the development environment, you should expect development to be going on.

Me: Yes and appears that this project architecture doesn't support any sort of isolation for development. So nobody can deploy anything except through the development branch.

Dev: That's what development is for IMO, so it doesn't bother me.

I finally received my Rasberry Pi ❤ what should I build with it? IoT everything seems to be the trend these days

How on earth are there people in their second year of a computer science course who are unable to understand how to read build errors. It's honestly not that hard, just look at the fucking build log and see where the error is and what type of error it is, but yet they don't bother reading the log and say that their "compiler is broken" when their 5 line code won't work.

If this was still first year I'd understand since many of the class didn't have much programming knowledge, but if you're in your second year and you struggle with this (that too for a Hello World script) it looks like you aren't even bothered and just expect the computer to magically understand what you mean.

I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO BUILD SOMETHING FROM SOURCE!!!!

So I wanted to install a package with pip. Shouldn't be that difficult, right? RIGHT? Lmao
Things I encountered on this adventure in no particular order:
- multiple undocumented dependencies, only explained on stackoverflow or some github issues
- inconsistent and outdated documentation spread over multiple pages on multiple websites
- Python version can't be too old or too new
- other external software version incompatibilities
- Build process that takes several minutes just to fail, then try again and fail with exactly the same outcome after a few minutes
- fucking SVN is needed?!?!?!
- VS Code is needed for completely manual build ????
- cmd/powershell incompatibilites
- required reboots

At some point I just gave up... Now I don't even remember what I crap I installed that I don't need anymore.
Please for the love of god provide prebuild packages or at least a very SIMPLE build process -_-

This pic keeps me motivated.
It says Great work need time to build their Empire.
What you think??

Hi everyone,
I got an hardware question. Im planning on getting a personal home server. I want to use it as a small gitlab server, continues integration, and the like for personal projects.
It has to be power efficient otherwise my dad will start crying.
I want it to be relatively cheap and running linux.
Ive got no clue what the best thing todo is. Should I get a prebuild one or build one myself.
For prebuild ones, what brands should I look at?
For a custom built what hardware do you recommend me?

I'm going to replace Designer with Architect.

Every single day: WHAT MONKEY DECIDED TO BUILD THIS SYSTEM THAT WE NOW HAVE TO CONTINUE DEVELOPING?

HOW THE FUCK DID HE THINK TO SCALE BY BUILDING A SYSTEM THAT TYING EVERYTHING TO A SINGLE DB?

one of our sales manager ask me,
"what so difficult to build ecommerce website, we work more than you because we strugle on field."

I just smile and start walking.

Spent ten plus years professionally coding, used c, go , python, openwhisk ,docker, kubernetes and God know what else. Now I have to convince those team members who coded so far in their free time that write fucking clean code, avoid dependency on distributed and hard coded configuration, how to build a product
Fuck my life

How fucking difficult is it to first figure out what the hell you want me to build, before assigning me a project?
But noo...make me implement a feature that will do a completely different thing in two weeks, and a completely different thing a week after that...fuck you Jeff

The qt is giving me such headaches. Can't build a project with spaces in project folders name. Are we back to 2005 or what

Back at <biginternationalorg> I witnessed a developer deliberately build an xss vuln into a company web application, so that he could plug a JS file in with all of his passwords hardcoded. Bear in mind, this is an org that provides services to both the UK and US military, and if you have access to some stuff you have access to the tools you need to impersonate high-ranking military folks.

I know its like, twenty different passwords, but that's what a goddamn keychain is for! If you don't trust windows keychains, do what I did and run a VM with a Foss keychain installed! Don't build a vuln right into a public facing web app, that's just stupidity.

Sitting next to my friend's client listening to her bitch. "I asked him to build me a website. I don't have the time to tell him what to put on it."

I interject. "You are tattoo artist. Don't you have a portfolio?"

She replies "Yeah. Can't he do that?!"

All day emails are flying with executives, managers and leads jerking each other off after a "successful" migration from old, weird ass in-house custom java build tool that took hours to build anything and required the dependencies to be downloaded manually, to mainstream tool that also takes hours to build anything aka. Gradle.

What the code monkeys responsible for this migration actually did, was write Gradle plugins that still call that old weird ass tool in the background.

Website idea:

If you can leave one sentence to the world, what would it be.

I want to build a website where people post those sentences.

Hey guys.
Have a look at, and be mesmerized
sunshinehostelfoz.com

Offered to redo the page in exchange for one night, let's see what they say.
Btw anyone knows what bullshit was this build up on? Can't check the code on phone.

Build project on GitHub with new tags, refresh every hour to see what if somebody found it and like "WOW check this out"? Pft, who am I kidding, still zero.

I just had a thought while thinking about Algorithms and data structures. Honestly other than for technical interviews I have never really had to use specific implementations.

Then I suddenly had a thought... What if I wanted to build my own operating system... I would also learn c++ as well....

I can't think of a reason to build my own OS though... Hm.. What about a programming language? Would that be like a mini-OS, and also need all this stuff?

Be me
Newb Ui dev
New job , learn c#
Become xaml pro first
Newb ui dev
Today building menu
It's breaking ree.
Ok I go through an fix
Part fixed
No reee
Commit build for other my senior dev
We have online compiler
Receive build fail
Reeee
My code is good
I'm sweating bullets
I call other dev
Yo I f***** up
Help me
Go figure it out ... reeee
I go spend 40 mins
Don't know what is killing build
Reeee intensifies.
Going to shit diamonds
Reeeeeee
Other dev, lol my bad I turned on somethin that break ur build. Your not fired congrats.
Reeeeeeeeeeeeee

Android is fucking fucked up.

Why the fuck it takes so much of time to build. And trust me,

React + Android is the worst combination. Can't even understand what the fuck it is trying to say?

And sometimes, no body knows what is wrong with something. Seriously look at the picture, that's the solution sent by the Android lead.

Did you realize the repeatedly at the end. 🦆 What try 🦆 dude.

Fuck. I'm ain't gonna work on this after this project.

What the f*** is this gradle in Android Studio??
M getting tired with this error. Whenever m starting studio it stuck on waiting for build to finish project.. I already done with checking offline work still it's not working.. What the f*** should I do with this error??

The build breaks due to a failing unit tests, and what does the dev do?

Comment them out.
Commit.

I really want to build a raspberry pi cluster but I don't know what to do with it...
Has anyone of you ever built a raspi cluster?
What could I do with it?

The object-oriented model makes it easy to build up programs by accretion. What this often means, in practice, is that it provides a structured way to write spaghetti code.
~Paul Graham

I've just received an urgent bug report email saying something like:

Stop sending [item] to destination. This should have been taken care of in the initial work, but we forgot to say so.

... The work they requested was that [item] gets sent to destination if the user checks a checkbox. If I wasn't supposed to build this, then what did they want me to build in the first place?!

What is the best PC spec for development?

Things I mostly work on: Node frameworks, React Native and some Java and C++ (QT)

I know that even a dual core is enough for this but it takes a while even for a webpack build to complete in my current build.

Oh no it's happening to me too... Gave up so many hobbies/interests to focus on my career. Now I have almost no interest in side projects because I don't know what to build. (I mean something actually useful not a to-do list.) I love my job, but is this the path to burnout?

So third party devs that my employer hired to build our web based application used fucking spaghetti jQuery to validate all of it with no documentation. What a bunch of cunts.

Not sure if this is progress or what... But the people who asked me to fix their laptops or build their website now want me to help them out in starting their very own crypto currency.

Client: can you build a website like that for the MissWorld competition and it should have a payment gateway.
Me: what other requirements do you have?
Client: hmmn..just something to showcase our agency.
Me: what's ur budget?
Client: around $100
Me: ** you must be kidding **

What are you doing crashing on me Windows?

All I was doing was running a flight simulation, compiling a build, and doing a regex search over 6 directories. Try to open one little document and it all goes to hell.

Surely you can handle that Windows?

Apparently not.

Take a look at open source projects which are known to be build well and compare their approaches to yours.

What did they do better?
Where were your ideas more sound?

Take the best approaches and continue to polish them, but always be on the hunt for the better idea

I'm just wondering how many developers is tire of people asking them to build a complete custom site in WordPress. And when you tell them "hey Fucker it would be faster and work better if we just build this cms from scratch" but the client won't budge they want fucking WordPress no matter what...

there are a lot of ad for web based start-up to be teams claims they have everything in place only missing a dev, what the F r they thinking without dev involved in early stages means to build a building by copy paste blueprint from Google

Our "agile" process uses one-month long sprints, ending on the last day of the month with a demo. (I'll rant some other time about non-consistent iteration lengths.)

Our sprint ends today (Monday). What was the most logical time to introduce changes that affect the architecture and break every single build? How about 4PM last Friday?

We're still waiting on the build breaker to show up while trying to figure out what the heck we can cobble together and run to show that we actually did something in the last month.

So my boss wants me to build his portfolio website, and he says to me. "Yeah do whatever you want, just don't make it look like a blog." What does that even mean!? 😨

I don't understand the point of giving a 'new' mobile build, 'everyday' to clients

"Today I did minor bug fixes and minor architecture level changes"

Now what, are you going to laser scan the build to see my changes? :|

I'm motivated to start a new project right know. But i don't know what i should build :(

Wondering what hobbies should i begin with while waiting for Android Build to be finished

Hey Linux users. Right now I have a 2011 MacBook pro the new MacBooks you are unable to take apart so I will not buy another one. So if you had a choice of any laptop what would you choose? I do not game I am a web developer and play around with app development and I build ruby CLI's. Any suggestions on what PC? Also I'm looking at arch Linux for distro what do you guys think?

You see this? that's Apple fucking up! Uploaded a release and their server could not do its job correctly... Now I need to do another build just to be able to upload the app again

It's been processing for two hours, and there is another build that is processing for a week!

Not only their XCode is shit but also their iTunesConnect is shit, can they just rename the company to Shit, cuz that's what they seem to be best at doing...

I want to build my lab at home, a useful lab, what can I buy to make a lab that I will use almost everyday please? I already have MacBook pro, an HP elitebook on OPENSUSE, my main gaming computer on Windows, a Raspberry Pi, tons of cables and a bit of money. Can you help me to find?

Am I Data Engineer or Software Development Engineer ?

I design the infrastructure for analytics data, and I build the infra entirely including an development. Except making reports out of the data.

What I'm supposed to be called ?
Data Engineer ?
Software Development Engineer ?

Definitely not an Data Scientist. Official designation given by company is Data Engineer II. But what I'm ?

Confused, someone help me please.

I'd like to build a visual Web of what it looks like with every user connected to eachother by their upvotes to one another. @Localhost would probably end up at the center.

It would be interesting to see nodes that would end up being a complete sink of upvotes.

So, I've been asked to build a tool that scrape's one's Facebook friends and their friends. I (surprisingly) managed to get it done.

I don't know what to feel about this.

Hello, I'm so nerd.
I want to build my avatar here. And even don't know what is a 'Rant' 😅.
But, I can tell a little story...
I'm learning js with an online teacher who has the most adorable Argentinian accent and now I talk like him.

I'd probably get laughed at for even mentioning "php"..

But what is the best framwork for getting started with PHP to build some complex site?

I have seen some here talking good about either codeignitor or laravel. Not sure.

What podcasts are you guys listing to?
I love 'How I build this' and 'This week in ML and AI'

Main branch running locally - fine
Main branch locally connected to QA dB - fine
Main branch on QA server with QA dB - NOPE

OK - build main locally, push to QA server - fine
WTF.jpg
Main build by build server, push to QA - nope

Rebuild QA vm and dB - build main, push to QA - nope

Turn on full server logging - PASS.

MAXIMUM WHAT

Person : Today you worked for 18 hours. What did you accomplish?

Me : I did no progress in the code base.

Person : How is that possible? You were on the IDE all the time.

Me : When you have a huge package pulled in, that takes 3 hours to build, for every single change you do,

And the build path is screwed :D

I'm slowly realizing that my ability to build apps does me know good when I can't design and figure out what to build :/

How do you even learn the creativity I see on places like behance?!

Does anyone enjoy their Windows development laptop? I fight with it so much. I would be happy to smack it hard with a hammer for all of the embarrassing things it has done in front of customers.

They are trusting me to build a multi million dollar system yet for some reason I can't join a Skype meeting, or my mic doesn't work, or the scaling on screen makes everything look oversized.

What am I supposed to say? "Trust me to build your system. I swear I'm not as retarded as I appear."

Never understood why people bloody love their code. It's good to be happy about it, but
beats the zest for refactoring or any other sort of improvement.
Took me an hour to explain a senior dev why his changes introduced bugs in build.

Literally landed to the point reverting his commit and demonstrating the damn build to work.
To which he replies what if the data is corrupt
Damn it's not the data, it's your bloody senses.

What is the scope of Meteor? Does it have a steep learning curve? I'm planning to build a cross platform app (web + mobile).

Just fixing a broken build due to another bad merge by SVN. There was no reason it should have fucked that merge up but somehow it did.

Of course I didn't double check by building locally so that was my screwup but what I wouldn't give to use a decent source control tool

Finished all my side projects. Don't know what to build next.

Developer stress.

If I hear the word "platform" one more time...

What you mean are products that support varying use cases.

IMO, it's more difficult to build/support one application that supports 3 different user types, than it is to have 3 different well-scoped applications.

Thoughts?

I was told to build a logging app for one of the work streams on my project. The lead briefly brainstormed about the data fields they'd need to log and told me to go make it.

I am handing off the app and they ask me what they are supposed to put in each field.

Me: oh [team lead] just told me to put in these fields, but you guys are going to use it so why don't you tell me which fields you need and I can change it easily.

They refuse to tell me how to build the app they're going to use and will definitely complain about it not doing what they want later.

I want to build a home automation bot but I don't know what kind of features to give it. I have hue lights and I want a smart speaker/google home mini. Do you guys have ideas? I'm open for everything.

I am fed up of developing websites backends and do not like working on frontend. What areas should I work in, where I can get to learn low level programming and build something to be proud of rather than shitty shiny websites with CRUD operations mostly dictated by frameworks and libraries.

To all the developers and designers that build these fancy motion-blur and depth-of-field effects for videogames.
In the name of all gamers, I want to tell you,
We hate what you are doing.
Stop this shit.

So i want to build a desktop app for some of my colleagues and me. Unfortunately, we all have different operating systems.

What are your suggestions for cross-plattform (Linux, MacOS, Windows) desktop develeopment? Besides js or js-frameworks.

Build a tool two years ago that I used to download anime of a website.
Buggers now broke it by encrypting(?) a URL I need and using obfuscated JS so I can't find what I need D:

So I got a call from a client wanting me to build a login , hierarchy signup , and possibly reporting website. I'm charging 50 an hour and qouted a 1000 rough estimate on number of pages need to accomplish task. Was wondering what everyone else charges for this?

I don't drink, mainly because I'm not going to be 21 until November, but I have been extremely tired while programming before. One time it was like 4 in the morning and I just wanted to get my app to build successfully with no errors. I got that to happen, then went to bed. When I woke up seven hours later, I went back to work on the app some more, and I had no idea what I changed when I was borderline asleep to make the app build successfully. Go figure.

Friend: I have a idea that will make us millions!
Me: okay, what is it?
Friend: oh its very simple, what I need you to do is build a payment gateway that supports X billing platforms, Y security protocols, crash proof, blah blah blah... Should be done in a week right?

So today's conversation with my co-worker who built our build system...

Me:OS X build server is not building valid installs.
Him:What's the problem?
Me:The KEXT is not rebuild... I think that Jenkins isn't capable of updating the file because of the permissions the script set when you test compiled it manually... Could you please add Jenkins user to sudoers file or something?
Him:Yes of course, but what should I google?

WTF dude? Do you even think yourself? And for some reason no-one has acces to the build servers configs exept for him and he shows up like 3 times a week...

Got an openai invite.

Funny thing it has been so long since I requested it, I no longer remember what I was gonna build.

I know some people who are better qualified and wanted access haven't been able to get access yet.

So, any suggestions?

Hey guys :D So, finally I have to build a website for a service. That means setting up a server and all that stuff...
What servers do you recommend? Also service for DNS?
Thanks :D

Couple of advices from the QA guy

1) Don’t do the bare minimum bc the PM asks that. The people that write up the tasks/requirements don’t know their shit sometimes. Or even worse, they just copy paste what the client asked.
2) Confront the PM and ask more time to build something robust and scalable. When shit don’t work, people will blame the devs which is not fair. Is not easy but put your foot down when you’ve being asked to build shitty stuff bc the client want it ready now.

Opinion | What kind software project could be submitted to college as a supplement ... Like a scripting language build from scratch?

Someone knows about delta printers? I build one with a 8 bit mcu and I'm planning to upgrade to 32 bit. What do you think about it?

so because of equipment limitations I am currently being paid to be bored and watch someone else try to figure out what is wrong with their code. I literally just want to build.

I haven't coded a new project in a long time. I want to build something, show it to the world and hope people use it. I love webapps as I'm pretty experienced in this, and have a huge interest for smart homes, internet of things, twilio, innovative payments and more. What could my MVP be?

Is there a server side framework that will build a website for me? I'm not a web dev, but I'd like to build a web app. What I'm looking for is a framework that will essentially be like a GUI framework and build the html and requisites. I prefer Python, but I'm still curious if it exists at all.

I worked with a guy who paid someone to build an app for him. I went home that night and started reading. Books, online tutorials, hackathon at what some consider the number one tech college in the country. Most of all, A LOT OF PEOPLE TELLING ME, NO!

devRant help me!

I'm getting a lovely little tax return and am in the middle on what laptop to buy.

MacBook Pro (I like MacOS and build quality, fight me)
or
PixelBook (I'm a google fanboy and love ChromeOS so once again... Fight me)

What do you think would be the best option keeping in mind the PixelBook will run Linux apps as well...

What the shitbiscuit is happening with trying to build a single window, 200 line node project? Who thought it is a good idea to use ShitScript to write desktop applications?

When planning a side project how do you decide what language/framework/whatever to use.

I have an idea for a web app that I want to build, but I just can’t decide what to build it with.

At the moment I’m leaning towards rails, but that’s because it’s probably the thing I’m least bad at.

There aren’t really any technical considerations, as it’s basically a system to record details of football matches I referee.

I can’t decide whether to stick with what I know and use it to build knowledge/experience or to use it as a vehicle to learn something totally new.

What project could I build to learn a backend language (nodejs in my case)? Any cool ideas? 😊

DAILY LARAVEL PROBLEMS

I need to parse a JWT with some custom claims. There's a JWT library with Laravel; documentation really lacking, kinda hardcoded to work with Laravel but whatever; it's already installed, let's see what can I do with it.

It turns out I can't say something like "take this token, parse it, tell me it's valid". Let's see how that goes.
You need to build a parsing class with a manager, some auth stuff, a parser.
To build said manager you need a provider that implements a contract, a blacklist, a factory (of what?)
To build the factory (of what?) you need a claim factory and a payload validator
To build the claim factory you need a request
To build the blacklist you need a Storage
To build the storage you need a CacheContract
To build a CacheContract you need IDK it's a mess
To build the contract you need... IDK for real

WHY LARAVEL IS SHIT: 'cause only in this framework it seems reasonable to build this clusterfuck to parse a base64 encoded string, throw some json_decode and check a signature. And have it work only to authenticate a user.

Single page apps? Why are there not more complaints?

Why are there so many ways to "build" these apps? Where are the standards?

Also, what do you prefer, framework wise? Please don't say Ember.

Question: We are planning to transition our old ES5 codebase to modern ES6/ES7 and even typescript.

What would be the build tool you would recommend if we want to start supporting ES6/ES7 and even Typescript?

Webpack, Vite some other?

This is a vanilla Javascript Project with large codebase it's been built using custom build tools like UglifyJS and UglifyCSS and of after lots of begging it finally got the green light to move to a more modern build tool and start supporting a more standard JavaScript Features.

Mainly I want to move to TypeScript but transition would be slow so the build tool would need to support .ts and .js as well, that is traspile both the .ts and .js into one final production build.

What build tool would you recommend for that?

After 30 years, some developers are still struggling to build websites efficiently. Our hypothesis is that this is due to severe and acute ignorance and due to taking an academic backend-focused software engineering mindset to the frontend without even trying to understand what web design and frontend web development has to offer and why.

Some one just asked me to build his site. I don't enjoy building sites. Especialy wordpress... I have never used it but i don't like it. But It could be a fast cash. What do you guys think?

What is used to build the backend of DevRant?

Mate asked me if Electron.js la good to build a desktop app. I suggested to write backend Api and so on in java and front-end in js using Angular or React.
What are your opinion about electron.js?

pgAdmin 4: I don't know what shit they used to build you and I don't give a light fuck, you fucking suck!! 😤😤

Why are you paying me to architect your new stack if you're just going to mandate that I use Guice and Jersey "because that's what you're using already"? I'm sorry. You're wrong. Spring Boot is not a "dying technology". I'm not going to build you a servlet from scratch. Get fukt.

tl;dr: why is it so hard to build a pc?😒

why is it so damn hard to find the right pc components for developing/image editing/gaming/...?😟
i've been googling around and watched many youtube videos on what components to buy/what to watch out for/tips/problems/etc...
i want to build a decent pc for web, mail, office, developing, running linux as VM (for experiments), edit images, doing most in multitasking (and maybe also play some games) ... basically everything, but i can't wrap my head around what to choose😟
every time when i think (for example) "ok, ryzen 5 2400G, that must be it!' there's always smth negative about it, come on!!🙄😤
i wanted to make an AMD setup for 1000€ max

i feel like as a developer/"kinda it guy" i know what i need, then again i feel dumb as fuck, not knowing what to choose and i'm almost certain i will pick smth wrong😪
do u guys have any suggestions for me/any help?

So, I’m on interview 3 with a company looking to build a cross platform app.
They posed the question of what we should use to build it; React Native or Flutter? Or just go native with Swift and Kotlin individually? What’s your thoughts?
I’m really interested in this conversation.

hey does anyone here have a idea what website i could build?

i know html/css, js, node.js and looked into express lately and would like to build something bigger but i have absolutly no idea what i can do ^^

I hate low code products. How about I build some bloatware that's inefficient, expensive to host, and completely dependant on something that will be abandoned in 4 years.

If you want to know what your application will look like in the near future, visit your Myspace profile

I would love to build apartment buildings and sell them.

but ofcourse id need a lot of money to start such a thing. hey what if i work as a dev for a while so i could afford that.

years and years later... var_dump($bug)

If you could build anything you want, what would it be and why?

(If this was a weekly question and you know the week number off the top of your head, let me know and I just go look there lol.)

I'm just interested to see what people here would build.

Hey Android Studio when I put you to bed you was happy and we had so much fun! Why in the morning when I open my project you complain about build issues? What changed?...

Oh, I get it GRADLE is messing you up again! FMDL

!rant
How do you get to learn something new? By doing tutorials on YT, Udemy? Going directly to the documentation of the tool/language..etc ? Reading books ? And to practice what you've learned what do you do? Do you build something that you've previously done in another language or look for ideas or how is it? Does anybody know about a "list" of "programs" that can be developed to practice a language knowledge? Thanks :P

Goals builder that follows SMART method for goals. What was originally intended as "rough draft" became a full blown SPA in less than 2 weeks. It's the ones you don't expect to go far that usually go the furthest. First "draft" took less two hours to build from scratch.. 😃

Looking at vacancies and the JS build tools asked (Babel, Gulp) and then visiting their websites I notice that I don't understand what they are going on about.

"Leverage gulp and the flexibility of JavaScript to automate slow, repetitive workflows and compose them into efficient build pipelines."

What the actual corpo fuck?

The "get started" page expects you already know npm, typescript, and when you look at their pages, well... Where does the circlejerk end and the actual Javascript start?

I've been out of the corporate loop for a few years, seems it's all about build tools these days. I need to get out of this industry pronto.

What the fuck is wrong with npm/react-native??!?😡😡

I completed a part of a project last week, worked well, then I cloned the repo today and It returns BUILD FAILED,

WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO YOU SATAN?!😡

Do you guys have any passive or semi-passive income going ? How much and what is it ?

Looking to build myself a safe situation, any advice is worth taking, cheers.

Where to begin for writing à mobile payment API for m'y country (and countryside) ?
M'y wish IS to build a mobile payment API that would help everyone to pay online no matter what carrier the user 's subscribed to.

Have you guys worked in flutter(dart)?
How long will it survive?
In my company, i suggest them to do project in flutter. They are refusing. Why companies prefer native development (as the crossplatform saves time for andriod n ios seperate build)?

What you think of it?

Just had my first lesson of the course Web Development. We got an explanation of what html, css, js and php are. Nothing bad ever happened from repeating what you already know, so yeah..

But then came the horror: We need to make a website in FUCKING WORDPRESS!! I ALREADY KNOW HOW TO BUILD A FUCKING WEBSITE WITHOUT A FUCKING SHIT CMS!!

So I showed the teacher my personal website and asked if I could use and/or extend that. They loved it, but I still need to build a website using fucking wordpress!! Not even using php! No, we need to build it with the UI of wordpress.

I know that's not even hard. It's just.. WORDPRESS!!

I guess I'll just have to live with it :/

Im learning Angular for my new job. You guys have any suggestions on what I can build (over the weekend) to learn as much about the Framework as possible?

Yo, i have a course where i have to build an android app, and we can make what the fuckever we want. Can you give me some interesting APIs, that are publicly available? It doesnt have to make sense, everything is better than using the anidb api, and thats the only thing that comes to mind.

What use is a frontend developer (having exclusively frontend development knowledge) that's not a designer / isn't good at design.
Sorry if I'm being harsh, but you're either a web developer, knowing how to build web apps (or websites, or whatever), or a UX developer or whatever, knowing how to do pretty (and usable and accessible and...) things. Or even both.
Lemme say it differently. You either come from a web design and build a frontend, or come from the development of an application (database, logic, architecture, APIs, etc., backend++) and build a frontend for it. Again, or both.
Not being able to design, and not being able to build a product, is just... nothing? You're in the middle.
Sorry, but I don't think you're a developer. Maybe a coder.

FUCK ME!#@$%@ 6 hours now, trying to make a production build of my react/redux app but FUCKING envify sets NODE_ENV after the imported libraries are transformed!! IT WORKED TWO DAYS AGO WHAT HAPPENED :((

I'm not lazy. If you want me to build you a typeface - I'll learn how to do it... and I'll do it ~ but when I get files like this... my brain just goes blank. I don't even know how to rename these. Even if I automate it... I don't know what any of them are. : /

Worst part (at least that's on my mind today)? People who don't build the app giving the orders of what needs to be done in it. They never know how possible things are, or expect them in half the time it actually takes.

What is wrong with Android Studio it used to be better just the sheer number of updates and the gradle build oh the gradle build

When the client doesn't know what to build and you know exactly what they need 🙌

I build an android app for a start-up. It took me 2 months to build that app. After I finished they didn't use the app as they started working on some different idea. They didn't even pay me for that app even after requesting many times..
Now after 1.5 years they have the audacity to come to me and ask me to work on a new Android app.
What should I do?

So my school forces me to take a partner in my project. I build him skeletons, give him examples and wait to see what he'll do. He was supposed to do CRUD for text messages in SQL database. In the update and delete functions, he does this:

UPDATE Message SET (values) ...
WHERE username=@username

Yup ...

School software development project in a nutshell:

You will need to gather the requirements from us by ways of an interview, built the documentation for it, we'll sign it and that's what you have to build.
...
We were supposed to get that signature 3 weeks ago, but they decided to not sign yet because they want to make late changes to the project whenever they want, yet we have to finish the build of this in 7 weeks... Seriously? That's what we have to work with.

Any working devs that recognize this situation at work and not at school?

What you guys gonna work over weekend? I am planning to build very simple editor to open CSV's. 🙌🏼

Hmm... Geekiest non-dev thing I do regularly is watch Mark Rober, Smarter Every Day, and Colin Furze videos. They can definitely be entertaining, but I do love seeing what they work on/research.

Don't really have desire to, for instance, build something with Raspberry Pi. But that's just me. 🤷

Everybody is bussy!

So let's going to give this mess to the one who never worked with mongo, does not know the objects in the DDBB, add to it some weird way to build queries in java to it and hope for everithing end well!

End well = need to be done today.

Guess what? Not for today! I have no clue of how to clean this shit.

How is it possible that nextjs developers could build a much more sophisticated web platforms than i do, much faster much more rapidly and easily and ship it to production for almost no costs, not even using any devops pipeline, unit or untegration testing, while i do all of that + devops and it costs me to pay for servers on aws?????

Literally what a nextjs developer can build in 1 month it would take me at least 3-4 months

i hate when a client ask me to build a system and he have no idea about what he want to build.

Hey devRant!

University student here. I’m trying to learn how to build scalable applications. I figured what better way to learn, than to ask this community!

So, some questions:
1. What is a good stack for scalability
2. Regarding microservices, when and where should you use node, .net, and go
3. I hear much talk about docker and kubernetes... how would you use these concerning microservices

Thanks!

What happens when programmers are drunk like shit in an office party, and you try to leave?
"import back that muthafucka and lets build his balls"

I am at a hackathon and i can't find any ideas to build, what should I do other than watching anime