well that explains it...
all i had to do was break them up and now its up and running

A programmer and a business analyst are sitting in the break room one day eating lunch when suddenly the microwave catches fire. Thinking quickly, the analyst leaps up, unplugs the microwave, grabs the trash can, fills it with water from sink, and dumps the water on the microwave to put out the flames.

A few weeks later the two are again having lunch in the break room when suddenly the coffee maker bursts into flames. The programmer leaps up, grabs the coffee maker, shoves it into the microwave oven, and then hands the trash can to the business analyst, thus re-using the solution developed for the previous project.

When u break up with ur girl n she ok with it

*can't figure out why code doesn't work for hours*
ugh fuck this.
*angrily leaves for bathroom break*
*come running back*
I KNOW HOW TO FIX IT!!!!

Colleague: "What is a pl file?"

Me: "Oh thats a perl script"

Colleague: "So how do I edit it?"

Me: "Just break out emacs and modify that perl script lol"

Colleague: " *Triggered* did you just assume my text editor preference"

Me:" -_- what year is this ??"

Type it in, type it in, type a bigger number in. Oh how fun it is to break other people's software!

Your program isn't working. You just haven't found the test case to break it yet.

"Welcome to everybody's favorite show: Did It Break!?!"

"Here's our first contestant, Alex Brooklyn!"

* Audience claps *

''Tell us Alex, what command did you use?!"

ls -la

"And did it break production?!"

Not yet..., the website is still up, even checked without cache and on a different network, I haven't had any calls in half an hour and Sentry reports nothing

"Great to hear! On to round 2!"

Are you serious? Are you afraid of an SQL injection or something, and instead of properly sanitizing your queries you disallow characters? Or is your software and database so outdated that you're afraid special characters will break it? Goodbye security

WHY THE FUCK IS IT SO FUCKING HARD FOR THESE CUM SUCKERS TO UNDERSTAND THAT CHANGING REQUIREMENTS 2 DAYS BEFORE THE DEADLINE IS JUST GONNA BREAK EVERYTHING!?!?
I DOUBLE DARE ANYONE TO TELL ME ITS NOT WORKING TOMORROW...
STUPID MOTHER FUCKER PMS CANT PLAN ANYTHING

Oh the joy of helping elders with their computers..

...

Client: My computer is broken.

*Me expecting some kind of hardware issue*

Me: In what way is it broken? Are you able to start the computer?

Client: Yes. I can read Windows and then there's a login. It works fine but then It's broken.

*me standing next to client while client struggles to type password*

...

*5 minutes and a coffee brake later*

/* the client is finally able to figure out the password.. What a suprise! A note in the drawers containing all passwords.. */

Me: I'm sorry but I can't see any problems so far. You are supposed to be welcomed by your desktop *points at screen*. In what way is it broken?

Client: It's not the same as before. *now the client points at the screen*. Here. There used to be a picture here. It took me to <site>. Now It's not there. Something has changed.

*realizing that the client has lost his shortcut and wants a new one*

Oh the joy of helping elders with their computers.

Me: “I’m gonna rebuild this site from the ground up.”
Also me, 5 minutes into it: “Can’t figure out this stupid CSS thing I need to do. Gonna take a quick break.”
Also also me, looking at it 5 days later:

Wrote some code during the break that transform an image to the following styles, is it good enough to post on github?

!rant
Deployed my first website to production yesterday and the world isn't burning, the error logs have been empty and my (non-tech) colleagues think it is amazing.
I'm somewhat proud of myself.

Advice that I give to interns/grads:

In uni/college, you're taught *how* to code something to achieve a goal, and 99% of the time the code will work and do the job in a lab.

But when building things for a real production environment, you learn the 100 ways how *not* to code, from seeing things break left right and centre - basically everything and anything can break your code, whether it is users, the OS, other people's code, legacy code, lag, concurrency, the alignment of the moon to your server...

Feeling bored? Just break a random component of your OS and spend a few minutes fixing it. If you're lucky these minutes will expand to hours. Problem solved!

"Can you work on this ticket? It's kind of urgent."

-- "OK"

"And could you please not refactor? Just get this done."

-- "Why? What's the issue?"

"The logic is complex. We should not break it."

-- "Erm, that's what the tests are for. So yes, if the need arises, I'll refactor. The tests are my guidelines if the logic breaks or not."

There's a reason we create tests. So let's not hinder code base improvements by some random fear that stuff might break.

If breaks due to refactoring, we'll fix it by adding a valid test case during and then fixing the bug.

If my refactoring does not break the tests, I'll assume the code base is stable.

If your code is untested, then we have a complete different problem.

So, I just got up, opened my sister's laptop to work (she gave it to me while I was in this small trip) and I see this. She was like "if you break it, I'm gonna kill you" and I said "oh no! What am I gonna do? Hammer it or something?" Fuck my luck, seriously

Me: Can you go to that page and see if the issue is fixed?

Colleague: if I go there it breaks things

Me: yes, it should be fixed now, can you please check it to make sure?

Colleague: but if I go there it will break things

Me: Can you just go to the page

Colleague: it broke something

Me: what did it break?

Colleague: I don't know

Me: ...then how do you know it's broken

Colleague: because the gallery doesn't work

Me: WELL THEN THATS WHAT'S FUCKING BROKEN THEN ISN'T IT

Just took apart my laptop to dust it out from the inside. Had it back together, put the battery in. "Alright, time to make sure I didn't break something"

Beep....beep beep beep....beep beep beep....beep

"FUCK I FUCKING BROKE SOMETHING WHAT DID I BREAK?"

Google Lenovo post codes (Thinkpad laptop). DIMM issue.

"Oh fuck I forgot to put the RAM back in.."

Perfect now

Juniors are a fun bunch to work with.
Over confident, hero complex of that fresh graduate high, and then thrown in to the real world! Where there hopes and dreams are crushed in minutes when they see what monolithic applications really look like!!

But don't let that overwhelm you, your not going to be changing all of it any time soon, hell some of this code hasn't been touched in 5+ years and still works without fail.

Don't stress about the work load, you can only write 1 line of code at a time anyway, and hell, even seniors make mistakes.

The key about being able to manage this beast is simple, break it! Because the more you break it, the more you'll understand how a project is put together, for better or worse. Learn from the examples in front of you, and learn what not to do in the future 😎

But more importantly, plan your changes, whiteboard the high level logic of what it is you want to add, then whiteboard in the current codebase and determine where to slice this bitch up, then when it all looks well and good, take out your scalpel and slice and dice time.
Don't worry, your changes aren't going to production anytime soon, hell, you'll be lucky to get past the first pull request with this working 100% the first time, and that's a good thing, learn from tour short comings and improve your own knowledge for the next time!

Made a bad pun at work. Collegue:

What about I break this beer bottle *points at it*, stick it in your throat and put it up your ass sideways afterwards?

Me: 😅 I'll stop 😅

Sometimes my timing is bad :P

The problem with Linux... It's stable, you can get exactly the desktop experience you want out of it, BUUUUT, there's always an urge to tinker a little more, then you break everything and it takes hours to fix

>be me
>it student
>working on group project
>one guy is making the ui
>says he added "date selection events"
>check code

Switch(date.Day){
case 1:
break;
case 2:
break;
//To-Do: add other days
}

He did this for years, months, hours and minutes.
He bragged about it.

Fuck you.
Sincerely, fuck you.

Conversations between 2 java programmers.

Me: How it's possible that your code works?
Frank: I don't know. I try 10 times, and each time, I get an error.
Then I take a break...
Eat a humburger, play ping pong, drink coffee.
Me: That's it?
Frank: Yes
Me: I need a break...

When you see a comment like this in your codebase:

// I don't know what it does, but touching it will break it!

So I found a bug in Bootstrap 4 today that was causing responsive tables to break. I looked at it for a while and threw a bunch of potential fixes at it, to no avail.

I was about to open a bug report when I stumbled upon the cause...

I spelled “table-responsive” wrong 🤦‍♂️

I swear down.

There is a developer out there. His one mission to break something in such a way that it only falls over at 1AM.

I hate that guy.

Winter break is next week and I don't know what to do...

I have an exciting programming project I want to work on!

Buuuut, I also have this 1,500 page book I want to read!

Buuuuuuut, my manuscript still needs some work! I want to work on it as well.

If I do all three, I won't get to finish anything, so only one task during break.

Three of my favorite things... Why must choices be so difficult?

Also, the picture is the 1K page book I bought. :) It's beautiful!

if it aint broke, break it. 😂

Me: Making me work 17 hours without a 8 hour break is illegal.

Manager: You just sit at a damn desk all day and long shifts are required of IT

???????? Do you really think I just sit at my desk twaddling my thumbs?

When you break the Mc Donalds ordering system, and you don't feel bad, bcuz it runs Windows...

(Took 5 minutes for the system to reboot...
McDonalds should have run Linux... ;_;)

I fucking hate this cute little hack my company thinks it's found where if they schedule a meeting at lunchtime in the lunchroom they think it counts as a lunch break

i hate this "She-EO" crap. they can call that feminism all they want, but all it does is set back women 40 years. yes, your red blazer is gonna break the glass ceiling honey 🙄

My tip for staying productive: **Don't**

Take a break. Take a few. Have a nap. Take a stroll outside. Enjoy life.

Life's too short. If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong.

Fuck productivity.

Pomodoro technique, and if nothing works take a break from sitting in front of the computer, and focus on something else, it will get solved easily the next time you touch your pc

Github Inc. (Feel good inc. parody)
=========================

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Github.
Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.
Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.
Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.
Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.

Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.
Fetch it, fetch it, fetch it, Github.

(change) Fetch it (change), Fetch it (change), Fetch it (change), Github
(change) fetch it (change), fetch it (change), fetch it (change), Github

Repos breaking down on pull request
Juniors have to go cause they don't know wack
So while you filling the commits and showing branch trees
You won't get paid cause it's all damn free

You set a new linter and a new phenomenal style
Hoping the new code will make you smile
But all you wanna have is a nice long sleep.
But your screams they'll keep you awake cause you don't get no sleep no.

git-blame, git-blame on this line
What the f*ck is wrong with that
Take it all and recompile
It is taking too lonnng

This code is better. This code is free
Let's clone this repo you and me.
git-blame, git-blame on this line
Is everybody in?

Laughing at the class past, fast CRUD
Testing them up for test cracks.
Star the repos at the start
It's my portfolio falling apart.

Shit, I'm forking in the code of this here.
Compile, breaking up this shit this y*er.
Watch me as I navigate.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Yo, this repo is Ghost Town
It's pulled down
With no clowns
You're in the sh*t
Gon' bite the dust
Can't nag with us
With no push
You kill the git

So don't stop, git it, git it, git it
Until you're the maintainers
And watch me criticize you now
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Break it, break it, break it, Github.
Break it, break it, break it, Github.
Break it, break it, break it, Github.
Break it, break it, break it, Github.

git-blame, git-blame on this line
What the f*ck is wrong with that
Take it all and recompile
It is taking too lonnng

This code is better. This code is free
Let's clone this repo you and me.
git-blame, git-blame on this line
Is everybody in?

Don't stop, shit it, git it.
See how your team updates it
Steady, watch me navigate
Aha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Don't stop, shit it, git it.
Peep at updates and reconvert it
Steady, watch me git reset now
Aha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Github.
Push it, push it, push it, Github.
Push it, push it, push it, Github.
Push it, push it, push it, Github.
Push it, push it, push it, Github.

You Don't post an "X vs Y" article and conclude with "it depends, there is no winner"

We understand it your opinion so just say it, break hearts if you have to. But don't build tension and then leave the audience hanging.

Ps. This is especially for react vs angular vs vue

Other dev: “hey can you trying running (xyz) in your terminal?”

“Sure. Will it break my code?”

Other dev: “probably”

😰

"Don't install the Docker inside the Docker system, it will break your mind."

"First remove the break points, and then commit the code".

He described it as if the breakpoints could stop time!! 😂

When you've been working for ages and are desperate for a pee, but you've just had a major breakthrough and code is pouring off your fingers like honey, and you don't want to stop because it will break the flow.

Made my FIRST APP using Flutter.

How's it?

Fetches 'Random Rants' from devRant.

Should I put the code on Github?

PS: will break if the image is too long in height

Today I learned how to break captcha using tensorflow !
Wondering what is the use of captcha while it can be broken so easily?

Facebook is driving me absolutely fucking crazy so I’m trying to take a break from it. But I need something to fill the void so I’m gonna be spending more time on here 😎😎😎

Coworker: "Yeah, I know the code module is 25K lines of code, but don't try to break it up. At some point I realized that they just have to be that big."

Me: 😦

Sooo this happened when I got hired to "redesign" a website. I opened up one of the WYSIWYG areas and holy shit there were literally hundreds of break tags.

Sometimes taking a break can really clear your head. Yesterday evening, I was programming with my mate and couldn't find a very persistent bug. Didn't want to get a break because I just wanted to solve it. He convinced me to go downstairs and get a drink. Reached the bottom of the stairs aaaaand poof, figured out the bug!

There’s nothing like opening a legacy system you didn’t build and has for some reason lasted the turn of the century, only to add a new feature without breaking anything.....

Would have been nice if I had written that JS function before saving the other file 🙄

There’s nothing like building in production 💩

!rant

Breaking point in System Architecture. The point where you define it is ok for the system to break if you user doesn't meets the expected threshold of intellect.

In plain words, you say "F**K it, if someone is that stupid, let the system go down"

They don't teach this in college.

oh, ok, alright, it won't break the bank.. oh.. are we talking about actually OWNING a bank?

I took a break from coding for a couple of days maybe weeks in the last time in order to do other stuff and now when i came back i realized a huge difference

Is it just me or is the programming life..... depressing...?

Shout out to the people who take someone else's office chair. I just went for a toilet break then *poof* someone took it.

When you work for a long while in a convoluted piece of code and then compile and it just works...

*wink, wink*

Then you spend another 30 minutes going through the code in disbelief trying to figure out why it didn't break 😵

Just wow. I had a fellow developer tell me to drop support for Google Chrome. I hate to break it to you but roughly 70% of our user base uses Google Chrome (Google Analytics proves this). Like seriously!

Python rant

Where the hell is Break key?!

Story: I wrote multithreaded python script and went to Lab to test it. Script got stuck (one thread died) and I needed to stop that thing, but how without magic Ctrl+Break?

Damn you Dell with your slim and minimalistic keyboards!

Fucking news articles like wtf if they don't have a buzzword in the title they will never be published.

This Forbes articles talks about googles quantum computer and hotw it could break Bitcoin. FUCKING BITCOIN like who TF cares maybe you should talk about how it would break the ENTIRE FUCKING INTERNET.

Helped out a junior today with a minor JS issue he had. Told him, "cool so that should fix it on this page but it may break things elsewhere. Make sure you check it otherwise the client will go into meltdown. "
30mins after they go home. Client emails (All Caps) "WEBSITE BROKEN, URGENT HELP REQUIRED"
😡 you didn't bloody check it did you!
Ffffffffuuuuuuuu

How it would be if Microsoft built cars:

*press break pedal*
Message Box:"Are you sure you want to break?"
User:"Yes"
Message Box:"Are you sure?"
User:"Yes"

Me: oh awesome, wine 4.0 hit stable. Let's compile and see how fast we can break it!

*./configure && make*

Ok... Ok... It's been 40 minutes... Ok... Yep still going cool cool...

I think I need a new PC guys...

In an unexpected turn of events, it appears as if years of choosing fancy bullshit over code maintainability will cause said fancy bullshit to eventually break and no obvious way to fix it. There's no way anyone would have seen this one coming.

Wow i must have been brain dead when i wrote this code. Needed to exclude certain elements from response for the the list of objects.

for (obj : objects) {
If (obj.skipFromResponse()) {
break
}
add obj to response
}

I used break instead of continue at the if condition which meant it would break out of the loop at the first instance of condition being met.

This went through qa and has been in production for 4 weeks so how did this not break before. Well little did i know the list of objects was sorted and all the test data, qa data and everything so far in production coincidentally only had the last element with matching condition. This meant it returned everything correctly so far.

Today was the first time there was a situation where this caused incorrect output. Luckily as soon as I heard the description of the issue I remembered to check the merged PR and hung my head in shame for making such trivial error. I must have written way more complicated code without any problem but this made me embarrassed to even admit. 🤦‍♂️

This is my first rant with image, I was taking break and decided​ to read Android apps comments/reviews. So I picked this app call "Calculator", developed by Google.

Take a look at the second comments from the screenshot. It is beyond User Error...

Hey Python, why in the ever loving readability universe I can't break the following command across multiple lines?

df.replace(...).apply(...).reset_index().drop(...)

Oh, but I hear you say "Hitko, why you can break it into multiple lines if you break within brackets!"

To which I ask you, does this shit look any more readable?

df.replace(...
).apply(...
).reset_index(
).drop(...)

„Couldn‘t figure out how to detect the end of a case, forced every developer to end a case with a break; so it doesn‘t go through all cases“

- the guy who invented switch case

What happens if you break your hand/arm/wrist and it requires an arm sling (picture attached)? Can you still work or what? I'm assuming it varies from company to company or something. Do you have anything in place for preparation for this event?

Someday I will have a rant that gets enough ++ to get a stress ball. Until that day I will keep taking out my stress on my poor mouse. At least I hardly ever use it so it doesn't matter if I break it...

So you launched a new app/website. And you can't enjoj it because you expect it to break after each tap/click like it did during debugging. 😤

Legit got excited because today...on friday...one of our servers went down.

Why excited?

Tell me, do you know how fun it is to call your admin if he was "able to get it up" just for him to reply that he is having some "performance issues"?

Lmao it's fucking hilarious.

On another nothe, plz halp

First time spending my lunch break outside this year. Didn't realize how much I missed it. It really helps to breath some fresh air when you got a bad day in office. How do you guys normally spend you lunch break?

Worst possible coworker ever, narcisit beyond belief.... When something new arrived, sealed, he would open asap, break it (audibly and visibly) in front of everyone and proclaim it came in broken from the manufacturer.... He was absolutely incapable of reflection, logic or compassion in any way.

So the team I work on has this giant blue alien doll, the "build break" doll. You break the production build, you get the doll until someone else breaks it. I was wondering if some of the other devs have some fun things they do with their team. ^-^

So my dear programming teacher really hates break statements... I mean really really really. He thinks it's better for readability if you don't break from any kinds of loops (not even ifs) well then we came across a switch statement in class. He says "breaks only exist because it's needed in switches" well how about returning from a fcking swith? or goto? then you need no break...
Is there anyone who could explain why I should NEVER use breaks and why it's bad in any piece of code? Why is it better to just use whiles because fors are apparently evil again? Srsly I just wanna ask him to show me some big code bases without breaks...

I was browsing through xkcd when I came across this comic. Then I realised that a line break after every sentence is actually what I do when writing something in LaTeX. It has no effect in the end but I feel like it makes the document clearer while working with it. Anyone else who does this? ^^'

Have an 'anger' project open to the side, so when you get annoyed or tired of the paid work, take a quick break and jump into that project to clear your head, even if it is just a simple command line tool, done it before and it's quite a good thing from experience

Firefox: You know what our users need?
Ads in new tabs!

FML

Yes I know it is "optional" but why should it be there in the first place?

Today I thought I had a really unique idea so I started writing the script for it.

In the middle of writing it I decided I would take a break and look at social media.

First thing I see is an ad for what I was just writing...

FML

When will Microsoft stop ruining good products?
Xamarin was a decent enough platform untill MS got a hold of it. Now, you never know what the next update will break.
Skype is already lost to the MS darkness.

What's the point in having a relaxation/fun/chill zone/room in your company when you never have the time to use it except maybe on your lunch break? 🤔🤔

It is amazing what breaks when you don't insert a break in your case.

I didn't break the CI build. I alt fixed it.

Working out regularly.

It's a nice break and it wakens my mind and body.

And it eliminate tension headaches

Gotta admit. Amazon fire tablets are awesome for cheap tinkering and installing custom firmware in it. Using 7 of them to use at my super efficient smart home (😎) and they don't break at all...
I wish they allow direct international shipping tho...

You know that USB joke... well you see this cable fits both ways... Sort of except one doesn't work and will if you force it I guess u could break the input

Troubleshooting code...
Me: "ok cool did that fix it?"
Program: [same error]
Me: "alright, so can I break it harder?"
Program: [new error]
Me: "now we're getting somewhere!" 🎉

when you intentionally break something you just spent a lot of time fixing just so you can understand what fixed it

Is it bad that I'm excited about going back to work from tomorrow?
Like, I haven't even done jackshit throughout the break, and so it won't be easy jumping back in with both feet.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I am so sick of people using emoji's in business related emails. I want to hunt them down and break their fingers when I see it.

I'm kinda disappointed.
I installed Arch 3 days ago and it didn't break yet.

Is it justified to be angry at websites that break because of extensions like Ghostery or uBlock Origin?

'Cause I fucking hate it when their fucking website breaks because I don't want to have trackers on my pc

Breathe
Identify the problem
Tea break
Consider your options
Handle it

It took me a while to figure out why my systemd timer wasn't working

Ir was missing a line break at the end of the file :(

My productivity reduces by almost half after lunch and reduces to 10% the day I leave headphones at home. It is only after tea break in the afternoon that slowly I start getting back on track again

Why do things break when you deploy it to the cloud and it works locally...

When the work isn't as interesting as I'd like, sometimes I accomplish the easiest, smallest incremental task and waste time the rest of the day.

I guess because it feels like work, I'd rather apply minimal effort. It's a bad habit, and one I'm trying to break.

Today I had plans to refresh my knowledge about transactions' internals in dbms and in general.

Then the rainy weather hit the town. The whole sleepy day wasted on Netflix.

Well.. I guess it was time for a break :) haven't had one in weeks

"I don't see the point of writing tests on this project. It's just a waste of time. "

3 months later:

"I don't know what's broken and every time I change something I don't know what it could possibly break?"

FFS.

Me: *holy shit there's a lot of code in this template file, I should probably break it up I to components*

*goes through the effort to break everything up into component parts*

Me: *i should quit being lazy and actually register all my templates the way magento wants me to*

*5 hrs later*

Me: fuck this! *<?php include ...?>*

This stupid motherfucker just updated a dependency without even realising that it breaks everything, pushed it to the package manager and causes me almost 2 days debugging.

Nico nico wanna break your fucking knee

The best AH-HA moment is the ones that you just can't get your mind around and then go for a coffee break.

Come back to your desk and then ... bam! There it is!

Thanks, coffee ☕

So I just had a bit of a shower thought. Suppose you could get the linguists to break a language down and define all the rules that make up that language as if it were a protocol - exceptions included. If you get an arbitrary string of text, could you match against those rules, then break that down to the information it contains, and use that information against a new rule set to construct a new valid sentence containing the same information. Would you just have made the ultimate translator?

You can't break into what isn't turned on. We can now scale the admin interface down to zero nodes and spin it up on demand.

So... it's break time.

I just was eating fries with ranch... dipped my fingers in the ranch as if they were holding fries...then immediately hit Ctrl + z.
Took me a few seconds to realise why it didn't work.

jim :"this is not a bug.. you just can't use localhost for developing on your machine.. it is forbidden.. things break"

When your CTO has full access to the production servers and makes SQL changes directly without following process. Then breaks production and tells everyone "this is why we need to follow process!". Then proceeds to break it again hours later.

Ever stressed so fucking much you puke? It's becoming a daily fucking thing for me...

#include <iostream>

using namespace std;

int main() {
cout << "Hello world" << endl;
}

If it works, It's time for a coffee break!! :)

We just started a new project at work

The best part: You can't break production if it doesn't exist yet!

team lead/senior telling you that you're probably going to break prod and have to patch it for the next couple of weeks when working on one of the first migration epics on legacy monolith, but we'll get good data from it doesn't make it any less terrifying

Need urgent change for the site, it takes 5 minutes I guess, no more than an hour anyway.

Can you do it during your break? Thank you

if I take my laptop home...shit will break.
if I don't...shit still breaks and I don't have a way to fix it.

!rant

University assignment asks to create some encryption harder to break than Caesar Cypher. So I decided to go online and look for some tips on making a somewhat decent algorithm.

Universal answer: don't do it

😶

Well then, night off I guess 😎

Everytime I see anything with 404 i expect it to break

Favourite item has to be our coding monkey. He sits next to me and every time I can't figure out some code I leave him on my keyboard and have a break, hoping he'll fix it for me... Never works but there's always hope!

Trying to break it

Rant!

Why enforce a 90 character limit in code file (C++)

It does not make readability any better..
you either break up functions that barely exceed the limits

or

start making nonsense variable names just because they are short.

Question: is it common for test guys to ask you for data that requires you to explicitly break your software? I mean literally remove safety checks from the software to generate such data? Cuz our test guys seem hell bent on breaking our system, even if it means supplying data that is illegal.

I'm a bit confused as to why people are re-imaging their machines from one OS to another?

Use Vagrant (or Docker) and just set up an OS in a Virtual Machine? Then if you break it you just destroy it and provision it again. You don't destroy your whole machine.

Just had a first meeting with a customer who wants me to upgrade their system that a company spent one year making. He gave me the .exe and was surprised I couldn't just edit it.

He was cool about it when I explained, but it's tough to break it to someone how much more time it will take than they had anticipated.

Am I the only one with sore thumbs from using a phone and typing at work all day? Everyone talks about their phone and features it should have but I'm just like "hardware ain't shit if you're going to break your hands using it"

I think it's a tall people with big hands problem.

I did one of those shitty logic bullshit tests these a few weeks ago. It was fucking dumb. Was told to write an algorithm to test when an egg would break if it was dropped off a ladder with 100 steps. An egg would break if you dropped it without being on a ladder. Am I right? The guy was like yeah but what if it didn't? I said Well it would. Eggs are fragile. How about you go away with your fictional fucking logic and ask me some proper question that test my actual coding knowledge instead of trying to pony about on your high horse. Cunt!

I spent 4 hours to find I have written break instead of continue

I tried to make a Sudoku solver (using human techniques), and then I found it was NP-complete

Saturday morning. 10am.
Me: happily sleeping on the sofa in a friend's apartment.
Boss calls: 'oh did I wake you up? Can you please develop this mockup over the weekend?'

Being half asleep I agreed.

Well. After 7h without any break it is done. But one Saturday is lost and I'll never get it back :(

Somehow, a continue instead of break in a switch-case looks weird. Although it makes perfectly sense with regard to the outer for loop.

I'm always afraid to put apostrophe characters when naming things online, even if it is just a photo album.

If you type "Google" into Google, you can break the Internet.

So please, no one try it, even for a joke.

i think im losing my mind.

i swear i placed like, 10 labels on my VB form, the designer even shows it's there! but when i run it for testing it all disappears!

i think i need a break.

Spent most of my fall break programming and destroying my sleep schedule.

Worth it.

make dumbass solution duplicating code because you can't figure out how to do it correctly

nobody corrects you on code review

later somebody on another team has their stuff broken because of you and kindly offers to hopefully fix and not break what you got out of it

I need a quick break from an annoying Product Manager, so based on your experience:
Offend a software engineer in 5 words, I go first:
Can AI make it faster?
Me: ...exhaling...

Not writing tests for your code is like leaving it unguided in the hands of future Devs who gonna just change something and break the core logic and there won't be any regression test to run and check the integrity.

Sometimes it's fun watching new developer who don't want ur help end up writing random number generator code who he thinks works great and u break it in seconds. So much for innovation.

Did a Demo for a project I've been doing and I nailed it , damn it was epic.

How are y'all day's going? Don't wanna break my jaw sucking my own dick too hard

"Refractor this method to reduce its Cognitive Complexity from 110 to 15 allowed."
*Pan*

Ok let's do it :

label : for(....) {
if(...){
for(.....){
If(...){
....
break label;
}
}
}
}

*Pan Pan*

For the past 19 years of life, I've loved Thanksgiving break because it was an escape from school or a job I hated. But now that I work as a dev, I miss working on my project and can't wait to go back!

Guess who got a huge interest in Python this morning. I feel excited to start learning it and do some awesome shit! I need a small break from front end development so I'll try to make some simulators or something with python.. Dunno..

On Holiday break from work, and get a morning email to do some freelancing. Yeah, sure i !will do it today.

*Has more advanced knowledge on computers and cyber security...

Mother still cant trust with repairing phone, asking which phone to buy, and naggs about the amount of time i spend on my laptop saying i'd break it.

Well fuck. This laptop was nice, then the hinges decided to remove themselves from the mount points. Also a metal side rail mananaged break as well...

Anyone have good suggestions for laptops? Prefer machines with a distro of Linux on it, but not afraid to install

The idiot who has taken it upon himself to break into my unfinished, unused, unknown website only uses male names. I'm tempted to change the login process to let female names in (the site is empty so the difference will be a 200 instead of 401) just to see if he ever figures it out.

I hate it when depression strikes again and it renders me useless because I can't focus here at work.

I'm spending my break time right now trying to cheer myself up by looking at some memes online.

I always try to break my code when it works without errors the first time.

Just to be sure that the code I wrote is being used.

Anyone else?

Cincom VisualWorks
The only IDE for Smalltalk-80 and it's ugly and instable as fuck.
You can accidently break the program's code while using it, effectively ruining your day.

When you type 'git facebook' in your browser and need a couple of seconds to figure out what's wrong with it, it might be a sign to take a break and go on a holiday far from any computers. Good thing I have next week off...

Never be afraid to break something your working on! You’ll gain so much experience from trying to fix it including your own computer!

Tldr; Do not go to the bathroom when you are stuck on a problem.

Most of you will know that when you are stuck on a problem for a while, that it is worth to take a break to look at the problem with a fresh pair of eyes.

It's good advice and I have been doing it for years, however now I have developed a problem with it.....

I don't drink coffee or tea often so when I'm stuck I always take a bathroom break and most of the time an Idea will pop into my head how to solve the problem.

The problem now is that everytime when I am even a little bit stuck I need to go to the bathroom even when I just went.

It's really annoying because now I need to find something else to use as a break because my brain has associate being stuck with needing to go to the bathroom.

It's probably not a good idea to take a coffee break instead because if my brain starts to associate that I will be a coffee addict in no time.... Haha

Do any of you have a good suggestion to use as a break?

coding so intensely you forget to eat or sleep and you finally look at the clock realizing its been 3 days since you taken a break and you're wondering how the time disappeared. it feels like it's only been a few hours.

About 15h...
8:00 - 23:00 with a 10 min break in between to go get some food from the store next door..

Because stuff was promised to the customer and we were told about it on the previous day...

The customer needed it before Christmas, so we delivered on the 24th at 11pm.

*Writes CloudFormation Template.*
*Launches Stack*

Starts Murmuring,

"The cycle repeated
As explosions broke in the sky
All that I needed
Was the one (JSON Invalid Format :| ) thing I couldn't find
And you (Teammates) were there at the turn
Waiting to let me know

We're building it up
To break it back down
We're building it up
To burn it down
We can't wait
To burn it to the ground

Me: "FML :| "

I take a task, break it down in smaller tasks which can be done in one day, more if some problem came. But let's say if it finishes within a day and I have free time, I don't start the next thing instead I feel good that I'm done. Is it only me? 🙄

I swear to fucking god if one of my colleagues is going to yell "hosting" again at me (note they do it in a higher pitch than their normal voice)

I'm going to break something..

the usual: suffer in the name of curiosity.

all jokes aside, my goal is to finish several projects and take a long-ass break from it all to fix this burnout, and maybe even find a job somewhere in there too? hopefully? stretch goals?

Well, look at the brighter side Android developers, that long time gradle takes to build gives you the much needed break, doesn't it?

gsus christ, do you HAVE to break it every Fucking TIME???? Wtf's wrong with you???? Cocky motherfucker "ooh la la la, I'ma break it today cuz I've nothing to do but renaming hi hi hi hi"

Fucking OCD motherfucker go jackoff and GTFO of here

Probably would have been a good idea for someone to tell me that if I upload the project to my tenant too many times it can break the entire realm and bring down all the other tenants in it. Good opportunity for some team documentation 😊

Any development on a complex software is like playing Jenga. You make your changes and hope it won't break down the whole structure.

I actually like writing documentation. It gives me a break in a different pace, gives me time to refocus on what I've built and hopefully make it useful for others as well.

I think the worst feeling ever is taking a break from something, then coming back to it and realizing that you have to rewrite something because you put it off before you took a break.

I've had a lot going on lately, and I decided to work on a web dev project I was doing to get the hang of frontend development. Just realized that I have to rewrite a couple functions. Someone kill me now

I've come to accept the fact that when I first learn a new concept I'm not gonna know what the heck I'm doing with it until I code it for myself and break it and then fix it. Bugs help you learn.

Scrolling through and was reminded of something I despise - Windows Update. It always decides to strike while I'm on a tea break and I can't postpone it.

The amount of VM corruption I've had to deal with is ridiculous.

Nothing like working through the night, finding that big break through and getting 900 lines of code going with minimal bugs and then having nobody to share it with that can appreciate the beauty of it all.

Microsoft bought Github so what ? It's not like github is the most important tool out there. If they break it we'll just move on to something else no problem just chill people. Give them the benefit of doubt maybe they'll make it even better.

Does anyone know a semi decent printer available in Germany/Europe, for personal use that doesn't you a kidney and won't break after 7 months??

They're all so god damn awful it makes me want to pull my hair out.

Sometimes I get inspiration for pole choreos, so I can take a break to try it out. I don't even have to change from my pole outfit

Urrg my secundary screen tipped over and now its broken.

like seriously wtf?

it only fell like 30 cm, why would it break that easily?

Anyway, back to one screen productivity. FML

Don't attempt to debug a crash on startup using visual studio remote debugger over team viewer vpn using the worlds worst German hotel internet connection.

If you do, get a drink while it takes 2 minutes for the debugger to break.

Whenever I take a break from my editor, I end up pressing j and k to scroll up and down in be browser, only to be disappointed. Looks like someone at FB was having the same problem and added it to their newsfeed. Thanks bud!

How do you know when it is time for a break?

transition: color 0.5em linear;

When you cannot figure out what is wrong with this transition...

It gives me a break from the kids. But the cost of that is increased strain on my poor wife, and knowing that that sucks all the joy out of it.

how to identify the authentic recurssion post:
check out the tags: recurssion xy
check the number of comments it should be 2^x
those who break it go get urself fucked by a dereferenced pointer

When you feel like giving up on it all and just going off the grid... I've been programming too long. I need a fuckin' break.

Today was a real monday... Untill the lunch break nothing worked even the slightest bit, there was a lot of swearing in the office, afterwards it got better but still wasn't very productive.
So, how was your day?

My css is such a delicate house of cards I'm afraid if any user looks at the UI too hard it will break. why did I think Friday css would be a fun way to end the week...

I have taken a break from computer to spend it with my wife and daughter. We are the O2 watching Frozen on ice. Times like these make you a better father, husband and dev

Too many people seem to think that "goto" in C is the worst thing you could do. It's an abomination, never use it! (Not something I've seen here per se, just generally around)

Challenge:
Break out of a loop inside a loop without using goto, and make it look pretty. Seriously, I don't think it can be done, and goto just makes it so clean!

took a break from dev, thought lets rant...that's it..sorry if u were expecting more

Who here listens to Coldplay."fix you" when you having bugs in your code and it seems you will not have a break through...

Someone tagged PEBCAK on here the other day and it reminded me that I have this printed and hanging in my cubicle. It helps me not break my computer when someone comes to me to help them with stupid things.

I took a break from the chaos of programming and took the time to set some clear goals to realign myself.

It was refreshing, but I’m excited to be back :)

When you take a break from JavaScript and invest your time on other stuff, you'll realise how paper-thin it is. Java is to JavaScript what Car is to Carpet?

Back to work after a nice long break with the family..looking forward to it! 😊

Seems like the #1 rule of thumb in hacking is
"if you can't break it, make it irrelevant".

Seems to be true because god some of these OEM recovery discs are just... awful at securing themselves.

Visual Studio causes Covid!

Well, not really, but it surely disrupts life!

It is a damned shame that a product that promises so much is so flaky!

I have abandoned attempts to use it.

-loses form design
-fails to recognise break points
-changes target configuration on it’s own
-JUST PLAIN SUCKS!!!!
NOT USESBLE

Learning to troubleshoot issues with vms. Had to break a vm with a script I was given and then fix it. Docs I was given said x error should be in y log. I check the log; nope. Check the other logs for other possible errors mentioned; nope. Turns out something else broke instead and before of the thing I was supposed to break. Rip me

Can we like stop making new Frameworks every month and just take a break for like 2 years, cause Gawd Damn! 😣; It should be illegal to make a new Framework in the next 2 years🙂

Theres a method for speeding up diffusion generation (things like stablediffusion) by several orders of magnitude. It's related to particle physics simulations.

I'm just waiting for the researchers to figure it out for themselves.

it's like watching kids break toys.

Hi guys, as I think this is the perfect good place to share point of view, I would love to know what do you think.
Years after years, people fight against hacks/piracy, like governments or video games editor.
Recently, we all heard about that piracy team who said that in the close future, breaking games protection would be impossible, yet the famous Denuvo (DRM) even if hard to break, is still broke few days/weeks after game release.

Here's what I think.
No matter what, hacking/piracy will always have steps ahead of protections. Because that's the way it is, the way it works. Maybe protections will be effective for a while, but there will always be somewhere, someone smart enough to break it. I start thinking that when a iPhone/Sony claims that they were safe and Geohot break their protections one by one.
There is no perfect protection.
(Quantum computers aside).

What do you guys think?