If Programming Languages Were Girls:

Java: Your current girlfriend, you've been going steady for a while now. Things are okay.

Kotlin: The girl Java finds you cheating on, she's just amazing, and you wish you'd met her sooner.

Visual Basic: The girl you accidentally started a relationship with because you didn't know how to say no. But quickly realised your mistake and regretted it.

JavaScript: A childhood friend you occasionally hook up with. But you could never settle for a relationship with them.

Python: A bossy, manipulative girl who quickly turned things sour. But everyone else loves her because of her huge libraries.
-----------------------------------------------------
My and a co worker were joking the other day about what programming languages would be like if they were girls. This is what we came up with (Original inspiration: the Distracted Boyfriend meme (Feel free to add your own!)).

• Manager : WTF did you push, now it keeps crashing all the servers.

• Me : (silent, I'm trying to speak but nothing is coming out. Felt like someone in coma).

• Someone else shouts at boss : Now we now have 47 major crisis bridges​.

[I went running for the door to get away from everything.]

Only to find myself rolling on the floor tangled in my bedsheets after falling from my bed. Realized it was all but a nightmare.

Went to get some water. While taking the first sip...
Me: Shit, I'm late for work AGAIN.

Running for the door again. Then stopped to think if this is all some fuckin premonition. Hurriedly went for my phone to find out it's nothing but Sunday.

I'm thinking about a career switch now. No more devops once this is over.

During exams vs studying
While working vs while chilling.

Anyone else have this problem?

Got an email from client with subject starting with "VERY URGENT", the email mentioned how urgent it is to fix this issue multiple times, it implied that they couldn't do anything else while this issue existed, but they were very light on details. So sparse on them that I couldn't reproduce the issue. 15 minutes after the original email I write a reply asking for some clarifications.

They proceed not to reply for 4 days. Fix took 5 minutes after they explained the problem better.

Apparently it wasn't so urgent after all.

public boolean even( int num ) {
if ( num < 0 )
num = -1 * num;
while ( num > 1 )
num = num - 2;
if ( num == 0 )
return true;
else
return false;
}

I started studying computer science 3 years ago as a challenge for myself, try something new, do something I knew absoluty nothing about.

I was always the girl who didn't know as much as the rest. I took longer than everyone else, made worse solutions. I always felt like a burden.

Yet today, for the first time, I really felt like a real developer at my last week of my summer job. Explaining a five year older collegue (with a lot more (web)dev experience) about design patterns, git, c++, and helping him to understand and use it properly.

Apparently I was smiling like an idiot because he asked me if I was making fun of him, while deep inside I was just so happy to be helpful.. 😊

Okay, we all ranters love pizza, right?

TIL something that we should ALL keep in mind while buying pizza.

One 18 inch pizza has more pizza than two 12 inch pizzas.

if ((3.142*9*9) > (2*3.142*6*6)) {
return buyPizza(18inch, 1);
} else {
/* stop being an imbecile. This is dead code */
}

Just got laid off from full-time salaried position due to various business circumstances. I absolutely loved working there because they paid well, are low demand, they were 100% remote before it was COVID cool, and they didn’t micromanage anyone. Will continue to work for same employer but on hourly work order basis. I’m fighting the “provider” urge to find something else full-time as quickly as possible. My wife, who’s also working part time, says I shouldn’t be in a hurry and take my time to find just the type of job I really want. She’ll even go full-time while I search.

I’m the luckiest unlucky guy.

While everyone else is working, I took vacation for the whole December. Turns out, that was a brilliant move!

I stroll 20+km every day in this beautiful, puffy scenery.

Not just developers but this pisses me right off.....

Guy gets upset... Slams pen on his pad... Has to go and have a half hour discussion about his 'attitude'

Girl gets upset... Starts crying... Everyone else has to get lectured about what made her cry.

Both emotional outbursts but apparently one is ok and one isn't.

*For the record no pens or pads were harmed while 'researching' this rant

I've been working for years on a game that would be a mix between Dwarf Fortress, Factorio and SpaceChem.

Problem is, I keep switching between engines and languages, never making too much progress. I've written several isometric rendering libraries, tried out going fully 2D ASCII or fully 3D in unity... And then something else eats up my time for a while again.

Reading programmer stuff on reddit:

"C# onlY woRkZ on MicRoSoft aNd m0n0 suCks"

Someone else:

"Dude, .net core has been out for a while what are you talking about?"

Them:

"OMg I diDNt Kn0W thaT!!"

Really guys?? Its been out forfuckingEver....

this is the thing. People talk shit, spread misinformation, and just looo amazingly ignorant without trying to figure shit out properly first.

These fuckface wantrapeneurs, posting jobs (paying to do so) and then offering bullshit like:
- We have no funding, so you'll work for free for some time.
- Paying in fucking crypto.
- Wanting a full stack rainbow puking and shitting unicorn for peanuts
- Fucking scammers, posing as legit companies and asking you to install Anydesk.
- Asking absurd interview tasks and times (a couple of days worth of work for a task).
- Whiteboard and live coding interviews with bullshit questions thinking they're Google, while having 20 devs.
- Negotiating salaries and when presented with contract get the salary reduced by double the amount.
- Having idiotic shit on their company websites like a fucking dog as a team member associated as happiness asshole. (One idiot even had a labrador during the video interview while cuddling him)
- Companies asking you to install tracking software with cam recording to keep you in check. (Yeah, you can go fuck yourselves)
- Having absurd compensation schemes, like pay calculation based on the "impact" your work has

Either I'm unlucky or job hunting has become something else since I last started searching.

> le server suddenly stops working, no boot, no POST, no beeps, no video
*le frantic cursing on how perhaps that's why the fucking thing was only €60 🤬*
*takes out RAM*
> le server still not booting
*places RAM back without doing anything else*
> le server boots up again

🤔🤔🤔
Is this what they mean with things like "compile it again and somehow the compiler will not complain anymore after a while"?

Today while livecoding in lecture, my prof got a call that got shown on his Mac. His response to that was very interesting:
“Has anyone else noticed that phones have gotten so advanced that when we receive a phone call we treat it almost like a DOS attack? It impairs is from doing everything that’s secondary to making and taking phone calls and that pisses us off”

18 hours can't fix a bug

go to stack overflow spend 2h writing the question

post question

of course get a downvote in less than 50 seconds

then i thought: hold on while people answer me here, let me try one more thing

i try one more thing

it works

EVERY TIME, JUST AFTER ASKING SOMEBODY FOR HELP, I SOLVE IT BY MYSELF A FEW MINUTES LATER.

DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ANYONE ELSE?

While everyone else is talking about Firefox quantum, I'm here wishing there was a visual overhaul to Thunderbird because right now it looks like shit.

Does this happen to anyone else while coding?

I am about to fire this client.

I can't take any more of this abject fucking stupidity.

I can't take any more sentence fragment responses to detailed questions and thorough responses.

I can't take any more expectations that I deliver consistent metadata and hundreds of pages of documentation, yet no one else has to do the same

I can't take any more rules only applying to/hamstringing me and my team

I can't take any more fucking gross incompetence and grossly undereducated shitfucks that get to send ridiculous bills and have 0 accountability while playing developer

I can't take any more obviously nepotistic and racist hiring that walks back every step of progress we've made in the last 50 years

I can't take not being able to call a spade a spade and being the villain when there's obvious graft occuring at every level

I can't take these old fucks padding their retirements while rendering everyone else contractors and cutting off opportunity for future generations

I can't take how absurdly, blisteringly stupid the business people are, or the fact that one average project managers with a recent PMI cert somehow bills what I do

I'm 100% going to drop dime on these fucks to every regulatory body they are beholden to, their investors, their corporate owners and USCIS, since I've already doxxed the shit out of all of my coworkers that don't remotely qualify for the positions they occupy.

Yesterday I installed windows on the laptop of my parents. I thought no biggie I'm just going to do something else while it installs. AND THEN IT STARTS TALKING. WTF!!!

Also it said I can turn the voice of BUT THE FUCKING BUTTON DIDN'T WORK.

I hate windows.

Taking "fixing a bug in your head once you walk away from the machine" to a new level.

Fixed a bug, checked it in. Happy.
Go to a meeting 5 minutes later. 10 minutes into the meeting have the sudden realisation that the bug fix was wrong and while it would fix the issue it would break something else.

Anxiously sit there for 50 more minutes not really paying attention because all I can think about is that sucker being auto deployed to our Dev server.

Managed to fix it and get it committed without anyone noticing but FML.

I hate winters just because my fingers get freaking cold while coding. :@
Anyone else?

In 2018, while working in Tokyo for a Fukuoka-based startup, one of my co-workers insisted that he wanted an SSL certificate installed on his local dev machine, but he didn't know how to do that. So I created and self-signed one for him. When our CEO came to visit our Tokyo office from Fukuoka, the coworker proudly showed him how his browser would display that green lock icon when visiting localhost:3000. This apparently impressed my CEO, because a few days later the coworker was invited to work at the HQ in Fukuoka while everybody else at the Tokyo office (incl. me) was let go.

This coworker would also only copy whole open source repositories, foo/bar/g all occurrences of the project name with our company name, and tell our CEO that he wrote that code.

I don't know how to deal with this bullshit.

Lets get to know eachother, shall we..?

It's come to my attention that all we do is either rant, or post memes! Lets talk! D;

What's your favorite programming language?

How about spoken/written language?

Favorite band?

Song?

Do you sit or stand while working?

What's the last four digits of your SSN? Haha, jk..

What are you passonate about?

What projects (programming or otherwise) have you started/picked up/finished lately?

What else do you want to share?

Answer as many as you'd like~

<rant about devRant>
Can people please stop posting images stolen from someone else trying to get some points. I'm here to read rants and other interesting things you encounter while working with software development, not look at memes. Thank you.
</rant about devRant>

So this happened...phone somehow turned on in my pocket and the fingerprint sensor rubbed against the fabric a lot of times...didn't have access to my phone for FREAKING 2 HOURS!! Why should my phone get locked by the fingerprint sensor?? The way I see it, if you are someone else, you either have my finger...or you don't...like you could kill me and chop my hand off or be crafty and try and use my finger while I'm asleep or drugged...either way, it wouldn't take that many tries to unlock my phone 😒😒.

Anyone else thought, while watching the website of a big company, "I could do it better"?

I usually have a pen and notebook at my table while coding, to scribble while I'm figuring out stuff. Anyone else does this?

Are there any other developers out there who find that people judge their skills based on the color scheme they use in an editor?

I started programming with software that only offered one color scheme and have never felt the need to move away from it since I'm used to it.

While I'm sitting in the office, co-workers often come up to me, take one look at the fact I'm using a light color scheme and feel the need to try and convert me to the dark side as if that will make me a better developer.

Does anybody else experience this?

Anybody else work dual screen and every once in a while thinks, you know what, I need a third screen!

While everyone else is showing off 1tb of RAM, this is what 295 exabytes of storage looks like:

Just found this while trying to understand some code:

```
bool ok = true;
if(ok) {
// lots of code here
} else {
// even more code here
}
```

I thought this was worth my first rant...

Just curious, how is it like to work as a developer. I mean, as a profession and not a hobby or freelancing.

From devRant, so far I know that you work in an office, the managers and bosses are assholes, and people always write unmanageable and undocumented code.

What else is it like? Do you get to work alone or do you have to work with people? Do you stay there all day long?

I know its still going to be a while for me, but I want to know how it will be like.

Let's see the coder in you.
If I give input: 1 output: 2
If I give input: 2 output:1
Only these two test cases needed.
You should not use control structures such as if,else,for,while,switch etc. (The answer is simple) (Don't cheat)

int number;
cin>>number; //get number
cout<<??????; //Your code

My boss just asked me for a cheat sheet I have that lists all our app server's paths.

The paths are attached as annotations throughout some Java files.

Anyway I send him the one I have but he asks if he could have an updated one.

Now imagine if I were like most monkeys and had made this cheat sheet by hand....

2 mins easy vs an(other) hour of grunt work

Why is it that I'm the only person on the team that writes utilities to automate boring grunt work while everyone else just does it manually whenever it needed....

Isn't DRY a core principle of being a developer?

I'm the only person that builds utility apps that automate frequent tasks that people keep asking us to do....

*gets countless amounts of shit with Windows because of my "nonstandard use"*
WanBLowS fanbois: "Cheap hardware!! Hardware error!! Unstable drivers!!! Can't be anything else, this OS is rock solid."

I really wish that I had your ignorance. I know when I see a shitty OS in front of me. And mind you, it actually ran Linux a while back.. just that I couldn't use my Nvidia GPU in it and had to compile a kernel with all of that crap excluded to make it work decently.. fuck Nvidia. And you know what, it actually did run fucking rock solid!!! But over time I lost the config and X.org doesn't like my dualhead setup all that much, especially the ultrawide display.

So, how about we address this issue for what it is already. THE OS FUCKING SUCKS!!!

A tip to tech folks from my personal xp.

If you fuck up and make an impacting mistake in your company, like taking PROD down, noone is going to fire you on spot. Assign some more mandatory trainings - maybe. So you'd be more careful next time.

See, it's not worth getting rid of someone who made a mistake. You should be seated down and insisted to fix it. If you don't - then they might consider firing it. If you do fix it [with help or alone] - you become a more valuable asset to the company as you prove you are responsible for your actions and you take it seriously. You show that you can clean up your own shit and you don't need a babysiter next to you.

If you simply make a mistake and they replace you with someone else, that someone else is likely to be unaware of your mistakes and is doomed to repeat them. It's just bad for business.

Ofc if you making mistakes becomes a tendency rather than an exception, it's also a red flag for the business.

Don't get too laxed! And always answer for your shit. Never hide a fuckup - always alarm about it asap so that corrective actions could be taken by respective organs of the company while you are fixing it.
Come up with an action plan, announce it. Estimate resources you need [like help from others] - announce that too. Update concerned parties every half an hour or so about the status. If you find you need anything else while fixing it or you come across some blockers/delays/change of impact - always announce asap. Do avoid false alarms and disinformation.

// inspired by someone's rant today

This is how I feel while coding a system whitout tdd or any kind of tests, and it's the company's major system... Anyone else?

while me.alive() {
devrant();
eat();
devrant();
sleep();
devrant();
code();
devrant();
}

Anyone else like that here...

This guy I know applied for a senior position at a company I used to do freelance for. He walked in while I was spending the day there to work on our project.

We used to work in the same company and I knew that this guy doesn't know shit. He's the type that would foam in the mouth while bullshitting his way through any sort of discussion.

Anyway, they had him set up on a computer a few tables from me to complete some coding exercises--real simple stuff just to see how he would approach some common problems.

There was no time limit set but the tests shouldn't have taken him more than an hour.

He sat there for SIX HOURS.

At this point, I went out for a smoke, came back 5 minutes later, and found that he wasn't there anymore.

Apparently, he just stood up and said, "Nope, can't do it" and then left the building without a word to anybody else.

We never heard of him again.

Oh, and the tests? Not a single line of code written XD

Wrote a cpp semester project where i had to develop school management system.
The code was spaghetti and horrible with frightening OOP implementation but it was beautifully written with comments and 🐫 Casing.
Submitted the program and examiner rejected it while saying that i had copied it from else where and i could never write a beauty code like that .

You dumb 💩! Don't you know other basis to reject a person's hard-work

Hi hackers!
Just not sure about this one:
Is this true?
The closer i get to the router , the more packets i might be able to sniff.
And something else:
I might loose the traffic sent to the other APs while i'm close to one another.

Is there any way to capter all packets?
(I also have wired access to network but since the socket isolates the traffic let me know if there is any other method)

Thanks

!dev
Acourding to greenmotion, Germans only need 15 Minutes to assemble the Table I assambled today, while everybody else needs double the time.

Who else finds themselves typing esc + :wq in there IDE after using vim for a while.

Someone talk to me while I am busy.

Him: I think this table is in the wrong place.
Me:... Excuse me, I didn't hear you, what did you say?
Him: it's in the wrong place..

WHAT is in the wrong place motherfucker.. I didn't hear the whole sentence.. what the shit..

Someone else or it's just me?

Ah, the awkward moment when you're told to join a conference call to "just listen in the background so you know what's going on"

...and then no-one else from your company turns up, so you're stuck trying to appease a client while having absolutely no idea what's going on...

FUCK

Have you ever worked with people that constantly asks you what to do? People who are in the same spot as you, I mean.

- Hey, you should start debugging this while I finish this menu
+ So what's failing?
- I don't know man, but there's a bug
+ But where?
- You should look for it, I'm trying to link this to the controller
+ How can you not know?
- Do you know?
+ Where should I look for it? Here?
- ...
(One crappy solution after) + Here it is, I'm moving to something else
- ...

This female collegue whom I used to hangout during tea and lunch has suddenly started hanging out with another female collegue.

I'm alone, sad and overthinking is killing me. I asked her if there is something I said or did that made her hang out with someone else.

She said it's not a big deal and I should stop creating drama. I think I lost my self-respect while facing her about this.

A while back I feel asleep on the couch on the day of the state of the union address.

My deadass mind heard someone asking what the "state of the unit tests" was and I leaped up and said "there aren't any! i'm sorry, it's only a small project anyway".

Thank god no one else was there... 😂

Never ever open a computer while breathing...
I got a ticket to fix a computer from the production line that was turning itself off...
When I opened it, a dark dust from hell came right into my lungs... There were more dust in there than I've ever seen in my entire life... Combined...

I'm still sneezing 3 hours later, and a few black spots keep coming out with everything else...

Anyone else get extreme excitement/anxiety when you overhear random strangers discussing dev and nerd stuff, while you're sitting there trying really hard not to eavesdrop and join in?

My colleague is what you would call a cowboy coder. He solves problems with really complex solutions that only he understands and does not seem to care about that the team doesn't understand it. He's super fast and very skilled, but it leaves the rest of the team hanging. He sometimes works at his spare time so things we worked on the previous day can be totally changed the next day without any notice. He has also removed code written by someone else because he did not like it, in secret. I found this while browsing through commits that were committed directly to master without a PR.

We have tried talking to me about this but it doesn't seem to work. He seems to value speed over anything else and doesn't seem to have any respect for other team member's opinions.

What the hell do I do? Has anyone else worked with a similar typed person? He's really making my life hard and I think it's very frustrating. Please help.

Volunteered at a hospital and made some kind of intranet for other volunteers because they wanted to use a facebook group for internal communication which I found stupid.

Made a reactjs/slimphp app and learned a variety of things while coding, unfortunately it had to support internet explorer which sucks balls.

Quit after a year because of school and a paid job, someone else is maintaining it now :)

Programming while blasting the doom eternal soundtrack is something else

Sunday morning and I'm kind of afraid to start coding because I know that the time will fly while coding and I have other things that I have to get done today...
Anyone else feel the same?

I just had my cell phone cloned yesterday. End of the day, my phone lost signal suddenly. I thought it was a problem with my chip, so I decided to check that on a store and buy a new one next day.

Today, after I recover my chip and number, I started to see the mess. Someone used my number to send message to all my contacts on whatsapp, asking for money. Also, I had some contact info changed on the bank broker, which is really serious. I do not know what else is compromised, and I'm truly worried about it.

Someone has some good tips for improving security while using cellphones?

Started a new job this week.

Just learned that my manager strictly prohibits while loops and "if else" statements.

I am a woman with multiple years of experience in the coding industry , while in most of my jobs I have been the only woman in the team and I do agree there is a need for more women in the coding industry , however I really do believe workshops like shecodes are an absolute scam , the inclusiveness to bridge the gender divide in tech needs to start from the employers , all resources to learn to code are completely gender neutral and unbiased. I also find it quite hypocritical that shecodes was founded by a man and is taught by a man . Can anyone please shine some different opinions about this or does anyone else believe a similar thing ?

While getting a pro in Kotlin, I started using

when(condition) {
true -> doOneThing()
false -> {
xyz = whatEver()
blaBla()
}
}

instead of simple if-else.
It looks nice but also distracting.

What is your opinion on that?
I guess most will be like:

Anyone else developed a habit to structure verbal allday Argumentations in your head in Code syntax? Helps me alot to follow ones logic. Except when I'm arguing with my girlfriend. Sometimes setMood(angry) gets randomly called (bug?) and then every if statement seems to be valid, eventhough it should return false. An inputstream that contains my outputstream is initialized but .readLine() is never being called. Instead, the outputstream to my inputstream is being overly abused. Once we get dive deeper into our if-statement we will find a while loop with a mysterious flag. Noone knows it's origin. The while loop keeps printing out random concatenated strings until it overflows your own capacity. I would have said its while(true) but in fact there must be a timer in another very hidden thread or something that sets our flag to false. The other and only way I know to exit that loop is to call apology() 100 times (maybe a variable sets the boolean that could be deeply buried in her projectstructure like this CONST.VALUES.getMood().getRealMood().getTrueMood().TRUTHCONTAINER.angryMode=true)..
I wish I could get a stressball so I can continue theorycrafting and debugging. Its 4.30 am now, my better side is snoozing next to me. I bet making this a pseudocode would be fun.

Ps: I love my lady but I had to rent

just realized puting else continue in my while loop was redundant. lol

!rant

I need to pick a CSS framework for a[n eventually very large] React/React-native project at work. Any suggestions?

While I'm very good with CSS, nobody else is,
and eventually everyone is going to be touching the project, so it needs to be pretty easy to use.

I'm thinking of picking Bulma, or one of the newer, lighter frameworks, but I just don't know. (I'm also getting a lot of pressure to pick Bootstrap3 so we can... copy tables from unrelated sites? I guess? idgi)

Anyway, I have until Wednesday to completely convert over (it'll take me a day), and I still don't know what to pick yet.

Suggestions/advice welcome!

Just came up and outlined my next personal project... at 5am...

Anyone else solve technical problems while in bed?

I was browsing through xkcd when I came across this comic. Then I realised that a line break after every sentence is actually what I do when writing something in LaTeX. It has no effect in the end but I feel like it makes the document clearer while working with it. Anyone else who does this? ^^'

Anyone else hates those tutorials that go in a direction for pages and pages, then suddenly they tell you that while that works, it's inefficient and insecure. THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU NOT TALK ABOUT THE PROPER WAY??? You don't teach people to drive a car blindfolded.

So I had an interview. Went well. But apparently while they liked me I didn't show passion for development.

Any tips on how to that? Cause like... I like it and all but who really can show passion for working for someone else.

Tips please. Or job opportunities!!!

Does anyone else sometimes feel like quitting, selling everything, move to a small town in e.g. Texas, become a brick layer or carpenter and just start from scratch and build a honest working class day-to-day life? Or is it just me?...

In tech I always focus on what’s gonna happen next year, where will I be in 5 years etc.
I feel like by pursuing a good life I’m missing out on life 😅

Would be nice to do some honest, physical work and leave tomorrow behind for a while..

I don't know if anyone else here uses kik but there's something that's been bugging me for a while
Occasionally (frequently) bots start a conversation with you (the typical "come visit my porn website etc etc), right? Now, this has happened to me at least 20 times now, and EVERY single time, the bot's profile picture has loads of translucent yellow stars edited in, and I have no idea why
I can't think of a possible explanation for this, and I've put a lot of thought into it
Attached is a cropped version of what I mean

I installed WhatsApp after 7.5 years.

My family forced me to do so because they make all the plans there and I am left out.

I am strictly using it for family and specifically for cousins while ignoring everyone else.

While the group is inactive except for when we all meet (which is once or twice a year).

I am also on Instagram which is 99% of the time deactivated and the only reason I have it is when I did my backpack, I met some real awesome people and the only way to stay in touch with them was via Instagram. Too bad that I did not have it then.

Yes, you can hate me for doing this. But I need to get this off my chest here. I am integrated with Meta ecosystem, but I am making sure I tread carefully and take all measures to protect myself from any kind of damage.

Someone else disturbing me while I'm thinking about technicalities. Makes me lose my shit because recollecting everything afterwards is often more difficult than the problem itself.

Note to self: tell cleaning lady to keep disturbances to a minimum when I'm working, and turn notifications on the Fandroids off before starting work. No I'm not interested in that Telegram message right now. And God bless OnePlus for putting in a physical slider for that.. more phone manufacturers should start doing this.

Main language, do people have such a thing? Some quixotic shit about various languages I use:

C#: Microsoft
F#: never quite committing to 100% functional paradigms while still being one of the most enjoyable langs I use
Java: null handling via optional and maybes are ugly, but better than it was
C++: surprisingly functional in 2020
Haskell: no one else seems to ❤️ it, despite it being fucking beautiful
Kotlin: Ternary warfare, Czech sports opinions on how languages should work
Clojure: parenthetical scoping makes me far happier than it should
Typescript: makes ever more sense as it changes

So I just got off of a teams call which I suffered the classic BSOD part way through, a colleague tells me that the entire time I was disconnected waiting for my laptop to restart, my team's account was broadcasting a super loud jackhammer style racket to everyone else in the call 🤦🏼‍♂️ and of course nobody knew how to mute me so they sat in 3 minutes of what can only be described as noise 😂😂

I'm not sure whether to feel embarrassed to have caused the issue or to be annoyed that the software does something so random while I'm not even in the call or with a powered on laptop 🙈

If you are one of all those awesome developers and hackers and I only understand 20% of your rants then props to you and keep scrolling :-D

But if you are a young developer, fresh grad or just learning programming I have an idea, how about a mentor?

This literally just pop in my head right now while cleaning my kitchen!

I'd be learning along your side and also having lots of fun! I don't have any formal experience providing mentoring but have some education credits and patience.

I'm gonna stop the sales pitch because it's annoying even me! but Idk, i just thought that maybe there's someone else out there interested in mentoring services :P

I’m done with people that derail meetings and discussions.

While I want to seek feedback for an Interface that I wrote, these attention seekers decide it’ll be the perfect opportunity to bring up the topic of “how functional programming paradigm facilitates better encapsulation”.

Everyone else follow suit. I try “time checking” and bringing the talk back on track. Never worked.

I’m concluding that meetings are shit and a COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME.

Ok, time to eat some humble pie. I seem to remember ranting about the fact we were going to use an offshore dev house a while back, and I'd convinced myself they were going to be absolutely useless.

Far from it. It's certainly meant I've had something else to do in managing them, and I can't say everything has been completely rosy - but overall, they're a bunch of hard working, decent devs who write good, well-tested code, are receptive to feedback in code reviews and take the initiative and ask questions when they need to. Shame on me for initially thinking otherwise - I'll miss working with them when I leave this place.

Does anybody else think the new expressions are nice and all, but most of them are not really made for those small avatars we have?

most often it looks like the person is about to ask me about how they got their scars or they are making fun of asian eyes while laughing about it

it looks great once you zoom in on the profile, but on the smaller size version it just looks odd

there is some exceptions that actually look great on the small avatars too, but most of them don't

Was assigned a project for my degree with 2 others. I was only one Who knew coding and development. 1 guy spent 5 months on YouTube and other one corrected my papers grammar and stressed out notes while I did everything else in development. Came out with an A, but pissed at YouTuber.

Question from a CTO/co-founder in an interview:
"So you've changed jobs every year or so and you were laid off a bunch of times. Do you think maybe it was because of your performance or the company choices you made?". You fucking privileged city dwelling gen-Xer. You got lucky with your startup until now. You sell recruiting software and that worked for a while when the market was booming but now that companies aren't hiring anymore you want to pivot and also make employee management and HR solutions. Guess what? Everybody else is also doing that.

When you accidentally click on Android Studio while working on something else....leading to 30 seconds of frantically going through task manager and command prompt to kill it before it claims every resource your computer has.

I feel like thinking you clicked on AS is the real life dev equivalent of a falling dream....

How I see my code,

If(){else]:
Do -> this & that with them;
While (for)and >>;
//It takes me forever to figure our my own code

How I see someone else's code,

%fGu$@@)$'®}£jfksksj℅™™}£}∆¢b&jjwoajqh-2+=•{(=jajaJJwUUhh-jtffhk®{£{™>>¥,©®¢€££∆¶¶|×££{©]•{%$==¢++''). 92%+$+
//well I am not sure how in the world I manage to understand someone else's shit

Does anyone else get a serious internal urge to throw their computer out the window while waiting for Android emulators to load?

I received a call from my boss saying I was laid off while I was out.

Wait a minute... I actually just woke up... This was all a dream...

Wonder if it is a message from my subconscious though...

Anyone else dream they get fired?

This was when I was pursuing my bachelors degree. One of the professors was of the opinion that only her code was right and anything else is wrong! For example if she did something with a for loop and I did the same with a while loop, my answer would be wrong -_- What the hell -_-

(Also, often her code would be wrong too and sometimes wouldn't even compile.. She used Notepad btw)

Music genre of choice while coding? Mine is soundtracks from my favourite video games. Anyone else like me?

You get to work, things have broken down in the night, you have no access to production or even test environment and you have to guess why. You do the same job as somebody in other countries for less pay while everyone else has this laid back approach where the time they actually spend working is negligible. Until the sheer amount of entropy in your organization wears you down and you just become part of the problem.

1) I don't have to talk to other people while doing it.

2) The computer does exactly what I want it to do and failure will always be an error made by me, not someone else. That makes it satisfying.

3) I'm pretty good at it. It's just fun helping other people at school and creating small programs to solve problems.

//run every weekday afternoon
public void workIsOver(int hoursOvertime){

int beerCount = 1;
if (hoursOvertime > 1){
beerCount++;
}

startCar();

int timeHomeMinutes = 20 + Traffic.getTimeLostStuckInTrafficToday();
if (timeHomeMinutes > 40) {
beerCount++;
}

Boolean finallyAtHome = true;

if (goToFridge.checkStock("beer") < beerCount){
Log.e("Dude","WTF?");
}
drink("beer");

while (!girlfriendAtHome){

if (stash != 0){
Joint joint = new Joint(stash);
joint.blaze();
} else {
Log.e("Dude","Seriously?");
}

startAndroidStudio();
workOnSideProject(getCurrentSideProject());

}

girlfriend.communicate();
new AsyncTask<>(thinkAboutCodingInBackground()).execute();

if (bedTime){
try {
doSomeBedroomPartying();
} catch (NullPointerException e) {
Log.w("Sorry","not today");
}

activity.finish();

}
}

while reading rebecca & brain's book on object oriented software. I realised that the programmer is a special kind of person. the complexity he can handle, the struggle to implement a system, from input to output, satellite control, AI, robotics, heck, even the planning required for a simple android app, the complexity is overwhelming at first, then you get your jotter and break it down into parts, and you drive yourself to the edge of sanity figuring out an algorithm, then you go over that edge implementing it, but oh that great super hero feeling when you finally get something to work exactly as specified, I'm not sure people in other professions can understand the satisfaction. I'm very young in the whole programmer world, but I'm growing fast, I'm just really grateful programming found me, I mean, can you think of something else you'lld rather do? yeah, me neither.

Anyone else like coding while high? A lot of the time it gives me a different, more simple, point of view of my problem which helps me find a solution a good amount of the time

Xcode's taking an eternity to just archive a build. And what's worse is that the whole system turns sluggish, can't do anything else while archiving.

What do you use YouTube/NewPipe for?

I am using it to fall asleep when nothing else helps. Boring YouTubers are good for such a reason, guys lol.
I use it to do sport, to chill, to game, to be productive, to learn, to have some noise when I am bored (e.g. eating).
Offline music while taking a shower.

So tell me... What do you use it for?

Anybody else just stare at the monitor for a good 10 minutes while programming contemplating their existence or is it just me?

Hey, our air conditions are not free, so you really need to buy something else we charge you for the amount of air you have inhaled while sitting down.

Is anyone else get irritated while upgrading apps and seeing changelogs as:
1. minor improvements
2. performance boost
3. information not provided by the dev
4. repeating changelogs from the past few updates.

just tell me what minor improvement u fixed?
where performance is boost?
how can I trust if tomorrow you decide to add some malicious code.

I don't know but it really irritates me. Sometimes I don't even upgrade the app until they have something in the changelog.

Maybe because I am getting old now.

Anyone else have people that seem to constantly try to "prove" themselves to you in this weird, competitive way that only makes them seem... very annoying? I'll call him Bob here, but it's always something like:

Bob: Hi Almond, how's it going?
Almond: Ah not bad thanks, PSU blew up in the PC over the weekend though so that was a bit of a faff!
Bob: Ah no! How old's your PC?
Almond: Oh, like 7-8 years old now. I don't replace it often.
Bob: Really?! I replace mine completely every year.
Almond: Ah, cool.
Bob: Yeah, I'm a dev so I feel I need to. It's like my tool, you know.
Almond: Sure thing!
Bob: I actually spend quite a lot on it. I make sure it's got the fastest memory I can afford. Like, DDR5 stuff. That's really important, you know.

...etc., while I try to get out of said conversation for the next eternity.

Or:

(while in a conversation about a frontend bug I was looking at in Chrome devtools)
Bob: Hey Almond, you know Firefox actually had a plugin that did all this stuff before everything else?
Almond: Err, yeah, I think so. Used it back in the day.
Bob: It was called firebug. It was really good. Revolutionary.
Almond: Certainly was.
Bob: It was launched in January 2006 you know.
Almond: Right...
Bob: I used it back then.

...I mean damn, I'm all for being civil, but no-one cares you replace your PC every year, or that you know the year firebug was released, or that you once set up 5 identical PCs with different versions of Linux to run some benchmarks...

This is gonna be a long one....
A lesson I learnt the hard way - never go out of your way to help friends with their coding. I helped her always, sat with her on the phone and explained and taught and solved her problems for hourssss while delaying my own work, while losing my sleep, even during pregnancy, I helped somehow as much as was possible even when I was drowning in my own work, even when I’m was not okay myself. But, once in a while I am too full, I also have work, now I also have an infant to take care of as well, and yeah sometimes I CAN be too busy to help!!!!! I have my own life too!! At these times she says “oh you don’t help me anymore”. It’s so annoying seriously What the fuckkkkk and after this shit happened a few times, I expressed my annoyance and she says, oh it was a joke. But then repeated it. And I still feel bad in refusing to help when asked. But lesson learnt that I won’t put myself behind, I’ll help only when I have nothing else to do.

I've installed Ubuntu a million times before, but never had it hang here for 20 minutes, anyone else ever experienced it? :-/

Don't want to hard reset the PC while the USB is being used

!rant

Anyone else who can't focus while listening to music? I can't grasp how that's not annoying to people.

The sound of silence.
For real, the best coding flows happen then.

If there is something that I can hear and process, my train of thought behaves like a dream behaves when you wake up in the morning.

Even worse are children, humming, whistling or munching as the ONLY sound in that silence, Im scorching inside when that happens.

If I can't be somewhere silent (preferably completely), I block the distractions with binaural beats and/or sound of rain.

Share it with someone. They don't need to answer back.
Just lay down your thought process. I often find the answer reveals itself while trying to explain the problem with someone else.

Yall know else if()
Now get ready for else while()

My boss just realized that I'm allowed to say how I want to be treated as a female and it's ok while he can't say how a female should or shouldn't be treated is because I AM FEMALE and therefore I'm speaking for myself and from my own experiences not saying how someone else should feel!
Only took well over a year.....

While sitting in a train (5 hours trip) I really want to code something, unfortunately I dont have my laptop with me, so i just connected with ssh from my phone to my ubuntu vps, created some project via npm and use android app to edit the code. It is not perfect but works. Someone else code like that?

Owning BTC be like:

while(alive){

if(stockValueDrops)
cripplingDepression(me);

else
continue;
}

Don't. Especially while you're not a senior specialist. It doesn't really matter bad company or good: they all have something bad, they all have something good. From the bad examples you will learn WHAT, HOW and *WHY* should not be done. From the good examples you will learn what and why works and how efficiently.

Next month I'm gonna be working on a project that is SO bad I will flood DR with rants. But I'm looking forward to it, because I know I will learn what else should not be done.

Better learn from their mistakes than your own

Code of developer's life

int f = 1;
If( life == "smooth")
problems();
else if( life =="hard")
{
problems();
breakup();
}
else
{
while (f = 1)
{
bugs();😣
}
}

while(self.isWorking)
{
If(self.bored || !tasks.Length)
exit;
else
devRant();
}

Oh great...
I am slowly beginning to realize that my boss/manager doesn't care about refactoring at all. He cares about features and resolved tickets and thats why the code is a pile of spaghetti filled with hacks to fit every clients desires.
Also all of my coworkers work for themselves, ticket by ticket, either because they just don't care or because they are so frustrated that they don't care anymore. And here I am, an intern, and they expect me to cope with this deformed clutter of legacy designs, buried under hacks and workarounds, while implementing some new feature which in the end I have to put on top of everything else because nothing of that codebase can be reused. Fucking shit, fucking irresponsible managers who dont think about the quality of their product.

does anyone else listen to the Pink Panther theme and other jazz while programming or am I an OutOfBoundsException

bool showUpLateToWork=true;
bool rememberHeadPhones=false;
String DayOfWeek=Tuesday;
int hoursSpentOnPhoneLastNight=
int productivity = 100 - hoursSpentOnPhoneLastNight;
if(showUpLateToWork)
missStandup();
}
if(rememberHeadPhones)
Productivity +=10
Else
Productivity -=50;

While (hourOfDay(now()) <17)
{
drinkMntDew();
discussDataQualityIssuesWithBusiness();
lookThroughTonsOfPoorlyWrittenCodeForDefectThatBusinessWantsFixedYeasterday();
dieOnTheInside();
curseProjectTeamForPassingCrapCodeToMaintainaceTeam();
cry();
curseComputerApplicationsForNotResponding();
visitBathroomWhileLurkingDevrant();
}
goHome();
while (!asleep && hourOfDay(now()) > 17)
{
playWithPuppy();
qualityTimeWithMyWife();
pkayLeagueOfLegends();
netflixAndChill('litterally');
for (int i =1; i <=5; i++)
showLoveUsingLoveLanguage(i);
try
{
makeBaby();
} catch
{
learnPatience();
}
cuddle();
if(!wifeAwake)
checkDevrant()
}

hey... while you're working on this big project I've given you a stupidly short deadline on... you'll be ok going to make this tiny change on something else right? it'll only take you 10 minutes...

2 hours later still doing that *tiny* change...

Just spent 30 mins (in bed at 5am) thinking how to improve a mongodb collection sync process from a basic script I wrote years ago to a cleaner Java process.

But then asked myself why.... WHY THE DUCK SHOULD I TAKE THE INITIATIVE TO IMPROVE SOMETHING THAT I WILL RARELY NEED TO USE BUT WOULD MAKE ALL THE MONKEYS JOBS ON MY TEAM A LOT EASIER

NO ONE ELSE TAKES INITIATIVE, WHY THE DUCK SHOULD I...

THEY DON'T LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY EITHER...

Or I could just not share my toys anymore... Watch while everyone else toils in misery...

The more you learn languages like Javascript and Python, the more you realise that while every syntax differs, they're all essentially themes of the same if, else or and, type statements... This leads me to believe that with enough practice, it's possible to shortcut or pick up a new language progressively faster. Or am I just a melon?

Telecon about new requirements. I brought up concerns that while the customer's new approach would fix some problems, it would also fuck up something else.

Customer panicked because he didn't have an answer. I calmed him down that this telecon wasn't about finding answers, only for ensuring that we were on the same page with the questions. Customer relieved.

I actually explained the purpose of the telecon to the customer who had scheduled it. WTF.

“Practical” tech interviews for senior roles (from my experience): DONT worry! We won’t give you any “leetcode” problems!! Instead, we’re giving you only 40 minutes to do this huge laundry list of tasks that are simple but hella time consuming. We want to see how fast you can type. So you have 40 minutes to write a mini app while we take note of the shit ton of simple errors you make due to the time crunch as your fingers burn through the keyboard and then wonder why no one can pass our “simple” tech exam!!!!

DAMMIT!! the only tech exams I enjoy are ones that involve refactoring existing code bc everything else is a fucking speed test! I’d also MUCH RATHER take these exams WITHOUT someone there taking notes like I’m a fucking lab monkey!

Textbook definition of insanity is debugging in Spyder

While True:
Do:
#Comment out code
Run
If not BUG:
Comment back in
Else:
Print('Congratulations. You found it. Just kidding. It's not THIS line. It's just the combination of lines')

Does anyone have a suggestion for a good python debugger that allows jumping to statements, etc.?

who else hates recruiters/ recruiting companies? I have been looking for work a while now and my inbox is inundated with "senior" level roles asking for 7+ years experience in every language imaginable. I have only been at this going on 3 years now and definitely don't consider myself senior by any means but do aspire to get there some day. But how the fuck am I supposed to do that if no one will give me experience?? Rant over

So my coworker was trying to `npm install` after I recently installed Ubuntu on her machine and for some reason , I was doing something else, some jdk not being installed error popped on her screen.

She proceeded to have a mini freak out telling me that npm wasn't working because java wasn't installed and I started hysterically laughing in the middle of the office with my boss next to her staring at me... So I said firmly ( while laughing ):

"no bahuhaahah that's not hahahaha the case."

Still can't understand wtf she thinks happens with stuff in a computer... Cmon...

How do you feel with not having motivation to work on/finish your personal projects?

I'm working 9 to 5 plus commute and at the end of the day I just want to eat some food and chill. But I keep beating myself up over not working on things that will improve myself.

Does anyone else feel like this while working full time?

Anyone else feels technology didn't have a major turning point in a while?

I mean, since the late 1980's we had an explosion of technologies:

Gaming consoles
Macintosh
Windows
GNU/Linux
World Wide Web
Smartphones
The rise of advanced web applications and JavaScript

But now? It seems like stagnation for the past 5-10 years or so.
Sure here and there there some nice stuff(like Cryptocurrency, Cloud services, IoT), but nothing that feels completely game-changing.

What do you think will be the next thing that will completely change our lives?

>Be me.
>Apprentice dev, first real programming job.
>Excited to start work.
>Contract comes through.
>About what I expected, i.e. we own everything you make while working here.
>Sign and send the signed pages back.
>Next day...

>READ THESE 5 20 PAGE PDF BOOKLETS, DO PENSIONS, SIGN 3 DOCUMENTS, LET US LOOK UP YOUR DICK PICS AND EVERYTHING ELSE, GIVE US YOUR PASSPORT, AND SEND BACK THE ENTIRE CONTRACT.

>...ok.

Timesheets were made so that managers can be little dickbags and make a big fuss over the half an hour doing something that someone else asked you to do, instead of something they wanted you to do.

Its also a good way to force employees to become their own managers when you arn't giving them work, so you can have more time to sip tea while they scramble to find out how the fuck they will get their hours for this week with no direction being given

300 fucking people.

and only 120 are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING while everyone else can go fuck themselves in a COMPUTER SCIENCE COLLEGE

why is this restricted so much

why such a small amount of people are allowed to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING

are you telling me i sacrificed my time and wasted 2 years of my life on college because i wanted to study SOFTWARE ENGINEERING, just so i can go fuck myself after 2 years?

someone explain this to me

this is unacceptable

A client hired someone to work on a new feature while we were working on something else. The new guy makes huge commits that we don't have the time to read, really.
I merged and deployed my work only to find that the whole database was wiped. Apparently, the new guy pushed some code that reset the database.
I Spent the rest of the day looking through backups trying to restore the database.

While in Mec engineering university program I was in a robocup team (small robots playing soccer against an other team of robots using AI).

I designed the mechanical structure of the robots. After 2 years of development (while all those years our goal was to participate in the upcoming international tournament) we realized the software part of the project was mismanaged and really far behind. I couldn't accept that and learned how to code over night. Couldn't let the project I put so much time in die because of someone else.

With the help of others that came from other backgrounds than software, we made it the to tournament and the following two others after this one.

Now my job involves programming more than standard mec engineering. It also pushed me to do a masters in robotics in which I developed my coding skills even more.

Have to so a presentation tomorrow about a non dev topic.
While googling stuff I randomly find that cool amazing lib or new tool. Watching a video about it and end up codeing a hello world with it because it's so cool !
3h later: oh wait what was that tab about I opened 3h ago. Fuck.

Anyone else knows ?

Is anyone else dealing with AD(H)D in university or while working as an software engineer. I’ve been diagnosed 3 years ago and I’m still trying to find a way to keep my focus. I start a new project every week without finishing it. Medication helps but not for 100%
Does anyone else experience the same or do you have any tips?

There.s this thing where you can donate pc capacity to do medical simulations on protiens. It helps to understand deseases.
Its called "folding at home"

They now running studies on corona.
So today i started up my old mining rig again (6x rx480's) and set it up to run in the corner of the room. It acts as heater and since winter is starting here i decided well why not heat up my room while someone else use those gpu'sto study corona..

Well turns out mining rigs are still noisy! So much for that idea.

Well i will have to move it or no sleep for me

We are 3-4 days away from deployment to production. We are still bug fixing. But one coworkers decided this is the time to make a fuss about the way everything is set up. He doesn't like the dev database. So he knocks it over.. and while so doing it, he doesn't inform the team. And when I ask if something else is gonna knock over? No answer! (And something broke down too..)
Now we have issues to test our bugfixes. The whole thing took me half a day finding out and made me distracted with frustration, and not just for me. Most bugs could've been done in that half a day!
I so wanna punch the guy xD but no, I gotta save face, pfff!

Programming while drunk:

if (not drunk !== yes) { then return dance.png } else {return 'idk"}

I shouldn't rant while crunk let alone program 😂🙄

Interesting.. When I'm on sugar rush, my phone screen starts flickering. But just to me - noone else. Could be high blood sugar increases eyes' photosensors' refresh rate.

Could explain why lots of devs are troubled by 60hz monitors while others aren't

Oh look, devRant is opening itself randomly while I'm doing something else again

Anyone else ever been through an identity crisis? This shit is intense. For the first time in over a decade I'm questioning who I really am and how to be happy while interacting with the world around me.

I used to not give a fuck what people thought about me, my semi-haggard appearance was just part of my persona, but as time marched on and my hair got longer, I get nothing but shitty looks from people 40+. I feel like nobody takes me seriously anymore. I'm honestly debating just chopping off most of my hair and dressing nicer, essentially 'growing up'. Just kind of rolling over and blending in with everyone else. "The nail that sticks out gets hammered down." - I'm tired of getting hammered. I just want to retreat to my quiet little corner of newfound adulthood.

Way back in high school there was a school wide competition to see who would represent the school at the bigger competition (I dunno, regional or something). Halfway during the test I was on the third out of four tasks while pretty much everyone else was on the first one. The teacher saw this, looked at what I did and said to everyone "He is already on task 3, does everyone agree he represents the school?"
Everybody said yes immediately.
:) The dev equivalent of a K.O. win, felt pretty badass :D

If it’s a personal project, I’ll put it off for a while and do something else to switch things up - I might work on a different project for a day and then pick the first one up again.

If it’s a work project, I can’t naturally put it down, but I might just drop it for a shorter period of time, like a minute or two. Get up, take a walk, refresh my thoughts.

This may of course be a slippery slope for some, but for me it’s proven effective in juggling my projects.

Added an If/Else to the start of my Android app to ask for feedback. After writing the else I removed unneeded spacing. Then I ran the app... none of the action listeners worked. Turns out I accidentally deleted the closing bracket for else and when I said yes to feedback it never executes the reset of onCreate lol. Took a while to track down that mistake.

Do
{
// TODO: Do some proper naming
var myEgg = new Egg();
if(firstRun)
{
Paint(myEgg, red);
}
else
{
Paint(myEgg, randomPaint());
}
}While(isEaster())

I have used Firefox for web development since forever. The recent major update has absolutely turned my world upsidedown. 95% of my numerous, essential addons no longer working, tab groups vanished, keyboard shortcuts scuppered.

While I appreciate the moves towards speeding it up etc, it's nonetheless a goddam scandal.

I wonder if anyone else is facing similar problems. Any solutions?

import antigravity, random

bugs = 99

while True:
print(bugs, "bugs in the code today,")
print(bugs, "bugs in the code.")
print("Git pull the file,")
print("Fix and compile.")
if random.randint(1, 7) == 7:
bugs += random.randint(1,16)
else:
bugs -= 1
print(bugs, "bugs in the code.\n")

A rant about fucking google!

I search for a page, but my internet is pretty slow (not on wifi), so while waiting I think of somwthing else to search. And now I have 4 tabs open on my phone.

After a little while, I get the following error (see attached image). I get a little frustrated, but I'm a calm person, I decide to solve the (still loading) CAPTCHA and continue browsing.

After a little while, I get an error that my browser (Edge) is not supported and I can't open the CAPTHCA. On other websites, it has always worked just fine, but they want me to switch to their Chrome, to steal my data.

It is quite a clever trick if you think about it. Either that, or I've been hacked and there's a bot on my phone.

Here's my idea. In light of all the efforts to teach kids how to do programming, why not start with an introduction to discrete mathematics instead? From a lot of the programs I've seen, the kids are taught different structures such as if else, while, and for loops, but they don't attempt to start teaching them about recursive methods or even other structures such as linked lists, queues, dequeues, binary trees, heaps, different sorts, and other things. Am I just not looking deep enough into those programs? Or are the creators of these programs not wishing to cover those things because they feel like children wouldn't be able to comprehend such things?

My golden rule of debugging - Isolate issues by changing one unit of code at a time. Keep everything else constant.
Second most helpful rule - pick up the habit of fixing things by reviewing code, instead of relying on debuggers. Make you so much more aware of possible pitfalls while coding itself.

12 Hour bus drive while everyone else was partying and having a good time.
Well I drank some Jägermeister but so much for party.

Received a new HP Probook 640 G2 laptop for work, everyone else has theirs as 64bit machines. Yet the idiots who handle hardware and software installs installed windows for a 32bit machine. Well at least I get waste half a day and do nothing while they redo everything and then I have to still get shit done later.

While speaking i cant say if without an else.
I guess it's programming syndrome

"I like jumping back and forth between a few different things to let my subconscious chew on one problem while my conscious works on something else." - Loren Brichter

!rant
I have a question; when I get interrupted while coding (dinner, friends etc) I'm often "stuck" in my head while just thinking about the problem I were to solve in the code. Anyone else have this? Does it have a name and any tips to "let the code go" while not coding?

while(life):
if(YouTube):
watch()
else:
getBored()

!rant
So I've developed this weird habit of writing some important points while making college notes as HTML comments

Does anyone else do that?

For my peeps in the RoR arena, did y'all ever felt the need to change from ERB as yout server side rendering engine of choice?

I find it hard to use anything else, i would normally stick to it unless I was using Rails as an API and leave the frontend to React or Vue.

Asking about y'alls opinion because I knew about HAML from a while back. But never really used it and I find Rails with ERB to be really efficient.

Ruby pagebuilding with ERB is really flipping comfortable man.ERB has been my favorite for years.

Currently migrating a project to use Svelte and wanted to see what some of y'all think about Haml or erb. Just for the sake of curiosity. Don't know how many rails users we have in here.

Wk88 i basically see "I'm a beta that belittles myself, because everybody else seems to be so much better than me.."

While I certainly know how it feels, that mantra & mindset will lead to void or null.

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy and life's a bitch that'll keep ya down if you let it.

It's gonna be rough, but ye gotta stop calling yourself inadequate and start working on honing your skills.

No great feat happens over night, it takes practice and dedication.

Anybody else sometimes do not like being a team lead?

I am the senior most person in my team (in fact took interviews of the rest of them). While I love the work and the team, I sometimes feel that I do not get to code that much. I am mostly assigning work, or helping others. Even if I get in the zone, there is always someone who needs some assistance or some meeting, which breaks the flow. Also the tension about non technical stuff like salary increments, giving feedback and assigning backups. I do love it mostly, but my ass is nearly always on fire. The team loves me though. I am still young, took this responsibility because the owner trusted me with this (he has no complaints). Thoughts ?

is there a google docs for ides? like, real time editing where you can collab while you are?

i think that would be cool.

anyone else?

Dev-tip of the day:

Always make sure that your database table fields are long enough to hold the entire third-party API client reference ID, so that the last three characters won’t be cut off..

I’ve been “crying” here while debugging for the last hour because my API function and everything else worked, but the result wasn’t showing up in the third-party application (their API returned a 200), but when I tested it with their API sandbox application, it did show up..

#include<semester.h>
#include<tension.h>
void pain()
{
mind=confused;
while(study!=done)
{
paper = back;
parents=scold;
}
if(i==pass)
{
tension free;
}
else
{
go to hell;
}

//I find a couple beers after hours relaxes the mind enough to work through the problem. aka The Ballmer Peak.

while(stuck == true) {
if(time < endDay) {
console.log("Keep working");
} else if(time > endDay && beers < 2) {
beers ++;
} else if(time > endDay && beers >= 2) {
stuck = false;
}
}

I'm developing a new (just for fun) programming language and I'm wondering what features I should add next? These features are already implemented:

- Printing text
- Variables
- user-input
- Datatype conversion (String, Int, Float, Bool, List, Dictionary)
- lists/arrays
- dictionaries
- Sorting
- Shuffling
- random numbers & choices
- Math stuff like: log, abs, floor, ceiling, sin, etc...
- Time & Date
- Working with files
- If-else statements
- Ternary operators
- Loops (for & while)
- Functions
- Classes
- Error handling
- Importing libraries & other scripts
- Arrow/callback functions
- Escaping (\)

is there anything you often use missing?

Since becoming an "Architect", I've come to learn "Architect" simply means siphoning your will by eliminating all opportunities to actually write code ...

public class Architect {

static final boolean inMeeting = true;
private int will;

public static void main(String args[]){

Architect me = new Architect();
if(me.inMeeting){
while(meeting.active){
me.reactToEvents();
}
}else{
me.writeCode();
}

}

public void reactToEvents(){
if(new Random().nextInt() % 3 == 0)
will -= this.hit(this.face, this.palm, Force.CONSIDERABLE);
else
will -= this.hit(Office.desk, this.head, Force.MODERATE);
}

public int hit(Object object, Object with, Force force){
object.useForce(force);
object.moveTo(with);
return new Random().nextInt();
}
}

Stare at code I wrote weeks ago for a few hours, while not doing anything else hoping I get motivated to write more

while project != Finish :
if stomach == full :
keepCoding()
else :
orderPizza()
if project == Finish
goOut()

(Fyi, can't indent here. LoL. I am glad there isn't python around to blurt errors on my face 😂)

I wanna make a c+friends language and it'd be dev friendly and will throw lots of errors on compile to show love. Also it'll compile slower with each newline so you can always say "it's compiling" there will be classes but people instead and then instead of new I'll have create. As for loops let's go with a friendly do while loop and dontdo while as normal while or dowith i while to have a friendly for loop. Instead of ifs let's say decide() and instead of else let's have or. Instead of functions I'll have well you need no functions you'll have jumps and tests before jumps just like assembly has. Oh and everything will be a pointer because then it runs nicer. To create a variable you can't use = because that's the equal sign in decide you need to use "var int myint is 69" because why not. Then to print to the console "console.outputstream.out(myint)" instead of threads I'll have please like "please work" where work is a jump target. I hope you'll enjoy this language ^^

Filed a vacation leave to attend a dev summit while everyone else is on their company's dime.

Work on something else. Have nothing else to work, invent a feature and work on that for a while. Do something other than that specific problem and an answer will come to you.

while( battlefield1 != released ) {
thumbs.twiddle = true;
}

Anyone else anxious for something announced at E3?

Does anyone else obsess over coding fonts every once in a while?

Why is operator mono $200 per machine 😭

having some rich and poor friends , i have found some weird behavioural patterns:

1. the poorer they are the lesser they value time over everything else. rich guys not only value their own time, they value other person's time too
2. the poorer a person is, them more they find happiness in people than objects. the richer a person is , the more they spend 'buying' happiness in the form of shiny objects/materialistic stuff than celebrating with people

3. poor people are inclined towards respects and beliefs , while rich people are inclined towards facts and logics. a rich guy is always trying take decisions and make opinions around facts+logics(and even sometimes trying to create false facts around their perspectives), while the poor folks end up doing something out of respect because their ancestors or relatives etc "told" them to do so

======

I am not sure if i can infer anything from above facts. these are not the points that "make" someone rich or poor (or maybe they do, idk)

Both have their goods and bads, but both types of folks are not ideal : Poor people have decency, humanity and respect for traditions/people, but lack areas of growth. while rich people are so much focused on growth and gains, they forget to be a human first

As a friend, i enjoy both styles : get ample amounts of outing, fun, budget parties with my poorer folks, while going into fancy expensive restaurants and trying new cuisines with my richer folks :P

!rant

A while ago I ranted about how the programming club in my school decided to start teaching programming with arduino and it was causing the students to drop out because they were finding it hard, well today I went to the club and got there 10 minutes late, yet when I arrived, thinking that they would have started without me, there was only 2 people other than the instructor and assisstant. And the funny thing is that although 90% of the class stopped going to the programming club because they were finding arduino hard, the instructor still doesn't want to teach anything else and is adamant on teaching them arduino.

What a fucktard

The only difference between a beginner dev and a veteran dev is that the beginner is afraid to touch what he doesn't know, while the veteran embraces it.

Accept that you don't know all and will never know everything. Even so, learn something new everyday. Fight your ego when it tries to make you keep only what you know and reject everything else. Fight that bastard.

The world needs less "I know", and more "I wanna know". And remember, devs should be in the "I wanna know" team.

sudo rm - rf ego
sudo apt-get knowledge-upgrade

How is it that every laptop my mom uses always seems to have Windows Defender AND MalwareBytes uninstalled? The thought of her work laptop always needing to be connected to a super public airport network while she has no AV bothers me to say the least, especially when that laptop then connects to our home network every night. Looks like I'm gonna use Sophos and guard that laptop like everything else on our network depends on it...

I just realized that I may be hard to fire because I create a lot of apps. All other devs on my team work on the same big projects and maybe share code more.

But I tend to be the only dev for a lot of my work. In addition to building and deploying a few standalone projects.... That no one else has used. I write usage and design docs but nobody reads those.

And one application is very complex, has many parts. It even took me a while to pick it up at first and I've been the only dev on it for years... So built a lot of things on top.

Today I was actually talking to the business team that uses it and they were like when is feature A, B, C going to be done. And I finally said, has to be one at a time bc I'm the only dev...

Though last week I did ask for some help to look into one of them while I worked on another more complex one but I gotta train them. And well their part involves only a small part of the entire app.

My Coding Loop :

while (working) {
coding();
createNewBug();
if (bugs != 0) {
fixTheFuckingBugs();
if (bugs != 0) {
fuckMySelf();
} else {
continueWorking();
}
}
}

TL;DR: There was a Steam bug and I fixed it locally.

Some months ago, Steam had the problem, that if you tried to add anything from the Steam Workshop to a collection, you would get an error like "Process failed: 2", while it was loading the collection list.
I realized, that it would work, but there was a bug in the JS (Watched the network tab in chrome while trying to add to collection). I searched after "Process failed" in each js file and after 30 seconds I found the buggy if. It said something like
if (json.success != 2) {
//do error
} else {
//show list
}

After I changed that if condition to
if (false)...
it worked perfectly, although it would make problems if there would be a server side error.

Quick background:I'm am a student at a university in Alabama. I am also working full time and have a family.
My beginning C++ class was online and the teacher was...unique to say politely.
She would post lectures while she did some of the programming examples. That wasn't so bad, except she would cough frequently in the lecture(which wearing headphones would make me jump), and the tempo of her lecture would lull me to sleep after a hard day at work.
What was worse, she would post "projects" for us to do and tell us she would give a guideline in the code.

Well most times what was asked for in the project was topics we hadn't covered fully or she never explained well. Her "guide" was randomly saying a loop should be here and an if and an else should go here, but nothing else would be referenced.

Dropped her the first time, got a Day the second because I just could not follow her lecturing. I later took the class physically and with a different instructor and had the highest grade in the class.

I later had her for web development course and she wasn't as bad on assignments, but damn her coughing still hurt.

Anybody else work dual screen and every once in a while thinks.
You know want, I need a third screen!

Internships just kinda suck.
Like sure I'm probably not as good as the other Devs but knowing I'm getting over 5x less pay than anyone else in the room hurts.
Salaried and it works out at less than minimum wage if you convert it to hourly. Honestly what the fuck.
The experience im getting has been good but having to continue being on a student loan while working 38.5 hours a week is outrageous. Living in an already expensive city and I'm probably spending 10% of my pay on lunch in the office's canteen.

No bug:

while (work.isAt()) { if (work.isDone()) break; else continue; work.doMore(); }

I've been working on a side project for a while(many months) and I'm at my 3rd refactoring and concluded that the greater service I want to achieve the more complex the project become, nothing exceptional, except I feel like doing the effort of an entire team of software developers.

Someone else has/d such a feeling/experience? If yes, I would like to hear your thoughs/story(just curious ;)

Ps: soon I'll reveal some screenshots here :3

To be able to work from anywhere on this planet as long as there is internet connection.
Travel the world while working, who else could do that without being told when to be where?

Thoughts when I ++ somebody's comment/rant by mistake (while scrolling):
- Do you think it's rude to remove the vote now? i mean he saw my name in his notifications.
- If i removed the ++, would he think i removed it or someone else --ed him?
- I haven't seeen his name before on devRant, maybe he'll enjoy my ++ and upvote some old rant of mine as well.
You know what, fuck it, i'll just keep the ++ and move on. 😀

I don't know if I'm mentally connected to the other developers in the world, or maybe I sleepwalk and read devRant at night while I sleep, but every time I think something someone else has posted it a few hours before.

Even something stupid like "why the left is called left hand side? Doesn't make sense"

Going off the grid tomorrow for the first time in a long while. Will be in the middle of nowhere Maine floating down a lazy river drinking beers with friends. Anyone else off grid?

Happy Valentine’s day to all the lonely gang who are coding while everyone else is getting cuddles.

Like who needs cuddles amirite?

Cuddles are temporary
Your commit however stays in the second arctic vault for 1000s of years