HTML: Hate This Meaningless Life
CSS: Can't Style Shit
JS: Just Shit
Java: Just another vicious asshole
PHP: PHP Hates People
Go: (the "fuck yourself" is silent)
.NET: Now Everybody Thinks (they can code)

I really should find a more productive thing to do on my breaks.

So my college has Apple iMacs and this is the pain I have to go through everyday.
Why can't they just clean it at least once?

Shutting down my company 😔,

Can't do it anymore,trying to do the best work for shit pay.

Clients haven't paid... Now I doubt I can even find 10 quid literally don't have 10 quid to my name right now 😔.

Burnt myself out ... I can't even concentrate on my work cause I'm stressing on everything...never ending spiral.... 😢

Going to just get a normal job ... Just lucky I have parents to go back to.

Running a dev company... Really amazing when things go well, it's unexplainable in fact but... Devastating when it doesn't 😞

You know when you break up with a girl you've been with for ages... Like how horrific ... That can be... This is literally worse .. I didn't think it was even possible...

Teacher: Homework for next time is to make 2 web pages with three javascript.
* whole class is quiet *
Me: What's "three JavaScript"
T: undefined
M: Do you mean three files?
T: No, I mean three JavaScript.
M: Okay, so let's go with five CSS and twelve HTML as well then...

Please, go somewhere else when you can't explain your OWN HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT. Holy fuck.

Me: Finally, thanksgiving break. I can't wait to go 127.0.0.1 and read books all week.

Friend: Wait, so you found a phone number in a book? Dude, let's call it!

Me: ...

I'd love to have a friend at school who would understand my references but that's pretty much imposible.

The colleague:

- I can't work, my chair is uncomfortable
- I can't work, my chair is not ergonomic
- I can't work, my desk is too small
- I can't work, my legs are uncomfortable
- I can't work, my keyboard is not ergonomic
- I can't work on this task, John knows how to do it better
- I will only work on <this> type of tasks. I will not work on others
*gets assigned <other> task; browses the internet all day; at the EOD task isn't even touched*
- I can't work with Jack, he's too noisy
- I can't come to the office on time, there's traffic in the city
- I couldn't come yesterday, I was out of town. No, I will not log a vacation day - I was NOT on vacation. It's personal
- I can't<...>

Manager, 2 days to the end of said colleague's probation period:
- I am very sorry to tell you this, but our attitudes are not in line and we cannot continue working together. Since this is your 5th warning, we have to let you go.

The colleague:
- What?? How come?? I did NOT see this coming... You can't do this! I work here! This is where I work and you can't fire me!

*got his things from his desk and left. Never came back*

Everyone at the office:
- YAYYYY!!!! Let's have a shorter day today and let's celebrate this riddance in a pub! (manager agreed)

Me when I go the IT guy for the 7th time, asking for yet another software installation, because I can't install my own stuff on work laptops.

Programming as much as I can now because I've been behind on my school stuff so for the rest of the month no programming until I catch up and go ahead.

I can't wait till college so I can learn whatever I want.

This is how my day has gone so far:
1. In car, see advert about hackathon
2. Look it up, see tickets go on sale in 30mins
3. Read more about hackathon, apparently tickets go within minutes
4. Get tickets, print
5. Printer out of ink
6. Accidentally deleted ticket, can't reprint
7. No more tickets left so can't get another
8. Spend hours with data recovery tools
9. Remember recycle bin. Reprint ticket
10. Cry
11. Rant on devRant

My father just called me while i'm at work:
"You go a big fancy letter writting in english from outside the country (english is not my native or even my second language) , what is it ? .. "
I realised after that it's the devrant stickers 😂
Can't wait to go home and open it 😁

Today at lunch we were talking about the bathroom conditions. At some point I commented:

"I don't go to the one closest to my office, the WiFi reception is terrible there."

*dead silence*

I can't be the only one, right? (posting this from the bathroom, BTW)

I accidently spammed my own server from my other server, which caused fail2ban to go bananas.
Fail2ban sent ALOT of emails to my hostingproviders abuse department and they due to the amount of emails they got suspended my server.

I can't blame them :)

Woke up early. Feel great. Even office coffee tastes great. Today is going to be a good day.

Lead QA: - Hey I'm fixing some stuff in production, and now I can't reach it. Do you have the same problem?

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY, GO FIX YOUR OWN PROBLEM CUNT.

COFFEE TASTES FUCKING GREAT.

When I'm at work, can't wait to go home and work on my personal projects.
When I'm home I cook, I eat then I'm too tired to do anything except watching Netflix on the couch.
Then I go to bed frustrated for not having actually done anything I really like.
Am I the only one?
Is there any escape from this?

I wanted to go on a cruise with my programmer boyfriend.

His response?

"I can't be away from work that long."

Not because he'll get into trouble or anything. Oh no. He just loves writing code *that* much. 🙄

Me: "sorry boss I have a burnout, I don't feel to..."
Boss: "which part of the project you can't do?"
Me: "is a burnout, I can't go..."
Boss: "cmon it's easy!"
Me: "..."
8 months without proper holidays produce this.

StackOverflow's mouse cursor effect is exponentially decreasing my productivity as I go through the day.

I can't stop watching it.

I received a ticket today that said

"The customer can access the app fine if they're at their home, but when they occasionally go to the desert they can't access the app"

You can't make this stuff up.

Someone please kill me.

I decided to go back to freelancing.

But there's a lot more devs than before, and I almost forgot how difficult it was to attract clients.

Oh, and I can't believe I forgot about their shitty attitudes. I don't think a nice client even exists.

I hate it when people say they want to "GET a new girlfriend"...
Shouldn't it be "FIND a new girlfriend"?
I mean you can't just go into the supermarket and get some butter, milk and a new girlfriend. You can't buy them. By saying that, you seem to me as if you're treating women as objects. I know it's technically possible to buy a girlfriend, but that's prostitution.
I think that "GET a new girlfriend" just doesn't sound right...

Your opinions?

Me in the digital circuits class: "Bro I just got a pick up line in mind!"
Friend: "Go on.."
Me: "Girl, are you a boolean signal 1? 'Cause you turn me on 😏"
Friend: "I can't believe I'm your friend."

Half life 2 runs smoothly in a 12 year old PC with Nvidia 8500, 1 GB RAM, and a dual core.
A FPS with wavy water reflection, body physics and huge designed maps which is updates every fucking frame.

Today I can't run smoothly an IDE with 8 GB of RAM and 4 cores.
A program which only reacts to events stutters if I write at more than 3 letters per sec.

I wanna go back. Can we go back? Lets keep the new hardware and go back with the software pleeeease.

During a random meeting for a project:

PM: We'll need you to learn Go for this project. It says you know python in your job skills, so it should be easy.
Me: Uh, hiiii. I'm in security, not development. Can't help you, I really shouldn't even be here.
PM: I think Go has security built-in, does that help?
Me: ... I don't know, you need a developer.
PM: Do you know any Go people?
Me: I think that's something you should know.
- Silence enters the room -
PM: Yes perhaps, but you don't know anyone?

Fucking wat?

Applying to a school for CS major, and they can't even fix their website to not have a null pointer exception...

Do I really want to go here?

One of my support tickets today:
Hi IT, i can't install Pokemon Go on my phone

>Starts learning/coding in python for two days straight.
> Two days later goes into C programming class.
> Prof. Displays my screen as we go through a program as a class.
> Starts typing in Python
> Can't turn off Python mode until halfway through class.

> replaces HDD with SSD in weak-ass laptop, powers it on
> "wow, this is really fast, pretty cool"
> powers on ultrapowerful HDD based desktop pc
> AURGH WHY DOES IT TAKE MORE THAN 0.01 SECONDS TO OPEN THE FILE EXPLORER I CAN'T LIVE WITH THIS SHIT GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU USELESS PILE OF CRAP
> goes back to weak-ass laptop
> contentment

'tis true, once you experience the glory of SSDs you can't go back to HDD based systems.

I can't be the only one who feels that nagging guilt when they go a day without programming...

Where'd my points go?! I can't find them anywhere!

Can't concentrate when this guy constantly keeps a check on the page number (progress) I have reached while learning GO. 😂

when you want to try VS Code out but can't let go of vim 😅

Wear headphones at home office. Not because I can't play it out loud, but when you go around in Iron Maiden shirts the wife gives you a hard time about listening to J-pop.

My girlfriend...

We can't go longer than a few seconds without her saying something trivial and demanding validation from me 😂😂 Oh and trying to work while your lady is half naked sprawled out on the bed isn't very easy either...

Oh well, some things you just have to deal with in life.

Sigh.That day again where I have to work from the client's stupid office.
- Spotify blocked
- Youtube blocked
- Can't ssh to my private VM
- Office is stuffy and no fresh air.Smells like feet and french fries mixed.
- No paid lunch,I have spend my own money
Sigh. 6 more hours to go.

If your issue is not on StackOverflow and you can't find it on the web:

Go another way, you're probably doing something very wrong!

(I have solved many problems remembering this)

1. Decide to learn optimisation algorithms
2. Realise that you have forgotten calculus
3. Decide to learn from the beginning
4. Search for tutorials
5. Go through the introduction parts
6. You know that you can't complete
7. You watch other entertainment things on YouTube.

Stories of a lazy programmer...

need a stock photo
go to getty images
damn, can't download without watermark, dont wanna pay them
well, let the AI generate it for me

The AI:

I just love articles like "Moving from Go to Node.js"
2 completely different topics and different use cases and can't and should not be mentioned together

Boss:"Build templates that convert our 1000+ pages built for desktop, into responsive ones that work on large screen and phones. "

Finished...Run the company's code scanner and it reports violations of development rules (which was expected)

I go to request exemptions....

"Oh, no you can't use JavaScript or CSS that uses position."

# did you use internet while writing the codes for the questions?
* Yeah, I just took some help and...
# you can't take help from the internet. It's a rule. Have you not read it? Go through the rules of Toptal again and...

Rest I forgot -_-
TL;DR their rules

!dev
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT

My Mother was intelligent enough to get her phone stolen and screams at me over the phone of my brother why I can't do more than telling her the last known location

BECAUSE THEY SHUT IT DOWN
I CAN'T DO SHIT WITHOUT THE PHONE HAVING AN INTERNET CONNECTION

But what if they go through my files go into my bank account

THEY CAN'T BECAUSE YOU HAVE A PASSWORD ON IT

but they could crack it or something

NO THEY CAN'T WITHOUT TRYING FOR MONTHS OR YEARS OF POSSIBLE COMBINATIONS

but

NO BUT JUST FUCKING CALM DOWN IF THEY AREN'T THAT BAD THEN THEY WILL CALL ME IF THEY ARE ASSHOLES THEY NEED AT LEAST MAKE A FACTORY RESET AND DELETE ALL YOUR FILES
I CAN'T DO MORE THAN THIS SO FUCKING SHUT UP AND DON'T LEAVE YOUR PHONE AT A FUCKING WAITING ROOM AND DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING ON THE FUCKING INTERNET ESPECIALLY FACEBOOK

Thanks know I can't concentrate anymore........

Dear Dennis from Bremen, I appreciate how you dislike my websites color theme. And totally can understand that you can't employ me because of that. I thank you for taking the time and writing me this, even though I didn't ask you.

Go fuck yourself!

Sorry, but I gotta go with the inevitable. Apple.

Of course, their older slogan is ironic now. Used to be does more, costs less. Now you can't even upgrade the RAM in most devices and legally can't repair their shit without their permission. The only reason people love Apple is because of the ecosystem. Everything Apple works great with everything else Apple, plus it's very trendy to have that logo plastered everywhere. It's too convenient to leave.

Not my own bug, but at our sister company there is a PHP developer who almost gets fired twice a year, once when the clocks go forward and once when they go back again. He can't program dates well, or use stack overflow apparently.

Whenever I can't figure out my bugs/errors, I take a break or sometimes go home and check back on it the next day.
I always remember what Albert Einstein said:
"We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."

Can't help but go for targets with ssids like

That moment when a user tells you that your app has zero value...I have ~30 beta users and everyone I've heard from loves it except the one.

But the one is still nagging at me.

Client: "My proposed deadline can't be met? Maybe we should go to your office and sit right next to you to see how you work."
Yeah right, that surely speeds things up. Even if the ever-changing requirements require at least triple of the time allowed.

I wrote in a rant here that I couldn't access my 1TB external hard-drive anymore because I refused to "Safely remove" it from my computer.

My brother sent me today an image with it, showing me that he managed to open it.

I can't tell you how happy I am!

The solution: if you encounter the same problem (it takes forever for windows to scan it and you can't open it/ on linux it tells you to go to windows and and properly eject it), just go to `Device Manager` and `Scan for new hardware`. This should find it & solve it

So out shopping on a Saturday with the other half and 12yo son.... He clearly is wise before his years when he asks

"why do we always get dragged around all of the shops mum wants too go and we have to sit there waiting while if we want to go anywhere she complains and we can't?"

Hate to generalise but he's already figured out what most shopping trips in married life are!

This is why I can't go to Christmas parties 😥

It's defcon, bsides, and blackhat week. And i can't go. 💔 I miss my con friends 😭

My coworker can't be bothered with learning git branching, so he comments out significant functionality during testing and then comments it back in before go-live. What could possibly go wrong?

I drank left over coffee last night... Couldn't fall asleep.

I drank coffee for lunch in the office... still can't stay awake and want to go home....

Why???!!!! 3hrs left....

Android Q is actually pretty cool, instabilities here and there and I can't seem to get TWRP to boot on it to get it rooted, but overall it looks pretty usable already, especially for a developer preview.. go go OnePlus 😁

Time to go to bed.

Why not trying this lib ? it's not that late, let's give it a try for an hour and then --> sleep.

Woaw what, two hours passed already ? I was just still beginning to have fun ! so frustrating. Na, I could not sleep if I'm frustrated, let's dig deeper for 30min and then, go !

shit it's been an hour already, man, go to sleep now ! ...Actually it's too late already, better not sleeping and keep digging !

In the morning : can't wake up, tonight I promise, I go sleep at nine.

In the evening : oh new angular ! could worth a quick try before sleep !

So it's 11:32,
I can't wait to go to bed, finished development for the day but then my boss sez can you make a sketch up of how the building plans for the app would look?
Me:🙂

Me(To a tree): Hey tree, You have leaves but you can't go anywhere. I can go anywhere but I don't have any leaves.

Mum: can you look at my phone?
*bunch of random shit pops up all over the place*
Me: your phones got a bunch of viruses on it or something. You'll have to get it fixed
Her: can't you do it? You make apps. Can't you just make an app for me to fix my phone?
Me: I don't really make apps, besides that's kind of impossible.
Her: so what did you go to university for?
Me: -___-

When you can't go to the gym because of all the errors 😂 😂 😂

Source: Programming geeks

!Rant

> Go to co-workers working machine
> install tmux and mps-youtube
> play very subtle sounds from console
> close console but keep session running with tmux
> watch coworker go insane because he can't detect the sound source

How to make your coworker go insane in 5 easy Steps

FML

Worked on these amazing production projects during my time at the internship. Now that I am about to leave, every fucking thing that can go wrong is going wrong.

Why can't I just leave in peace :(

Peeps can't go any dumber ! lmao

Fucking hell with the password fields.
Why in the fucking hell you can't tell me what's the max characters count? Why I have to deal with auto-truncated passwords after the fact?
Go eat exquisite shit, peasant punks, pussy cutters.

Fuck Android Oreo and everyone who thought that the following ideas are useful:
- xy app is running in the background notification, which can't be disabled
- xy app is overlaying other apps, click here if you wish to disable it. But you can't disable the notification, you can only disable the app.
- the un-zeroable data limit. It can't be disabled, you can only set it to a retarded high number to avoid annoying notifications

Go suck a veiny one Android devs. Fucking cunt faces.

Stupid apple documentation. can't even give a damn example. I have to go to Microsoft documention to get example on a framework made by apple. What a joke.

unpopular opinion: javascript has broken standards, and nobody corrects it. people use these frameworks and shit with 600 dependencies, then can't figure out how to update their application when things go out of date. now people are expecting you to use NPM to make a - - > static <- - website

Can't fucking stand permanently lazy devs who don't give a shit about their craft.

Fuck off and go do something else that you actually give a shit about! *

😤😤😤😤🤬

* unless you're burnt out - then I'm sorry they overworked you x

One of my biggest pet peeves is when I see people say shit like "fix it now" when a bug pops up.

Like bitch go fix it since you're such a fucking intelligent individual. You can't? Well then, shut the fuck up and let them fix it. They're human too, ya know

A man's best friend is a Martini when you realize the college semester begins again at your birthday, and you're turning 29 that month with a year left before graduation. Fuck college. FML.

Yes, I'm writing this after having 3 martinis. My code can't pawsibbly go wrong tonight. Being a little tipsy is awwwwweeesome. :D

Just watched a 30 mins tutorial on youtube and atleast 20 mins of that was debugging his code. Can't you just re-record or atleast cut the part where you go through all the stack overflow solutions!

Well go fuck yourself Quora! I can't even read my digest anymore!

Trying to find a bug. Found a possible line in the code where it might be originating from.

Not I put a breakpoint in there. I can't reproduce the bug anymore.

Sometimes I think I should just go home and play games :(

I can't believe it took me about 17 years to accidently press the back button on the mouse (mouse button 4?) when Visual Studio had focus. Apparently you can go back to the previous code file by using the back button...

Hey so found another tiny bug, well more like a typo, if you're​ a subscriber and you go to edit a post more than it's time limit in this after 57 mins you get the old can't edit after 5 minutes alert dialog message, super easy to fix (I guess lol) and not too important

Me setting up Webpack for a project

Error: can't resolve ./src

Guess what? ./src exists. So I go searching for an answer, and it turns out webpack looks for ./src/index.js and if it can't find it then it throws an error.

But the error message is: can't resolve ./src

The issue was reported ages ago but webpack devs never improved the error message

THIS IS WHY WEBPACK SUCKS 💩

Yes it might seem like a little detail but it just makes it all the more obvious that Webpack sucks right from the start when you set up a project the error message is stupid and unspecific

Dear client, if you can't be bothered to check more than two data points during several test imports, why are you surprised your production import has errors in the other 10k+ data points? We told you to check thoroughly, and you swore it was fine. But great now I get to unfuck production while you're mad you can't go live yet.

Can I just say, this community is awesome. All Dev talk, all the time. It's like Facebook but not complete s***!

PS: UK Dev rant meet up has to go down. We can't have the yanks outdoing us.

You know that feeling when you're coding late at night and you get an error that you just can't parse with your tired brain, and go FUCK IT ALL, FUCK IT ALL

I'm having that feeling right about now...

A computer? We can't afford that shit.

Later...

Here son. Mom took this from her Job, they were going to trash it anyways. Go nuts.

Sister oh here are all my dev books. I am doing something else now.

User: "My computer is broken!"
Me: "What seems to be the problem?"
User: "I can't go to any websites."
Me: "It appears our connection to the internet is down."
User: "No it's not, look" *points to Wi-Fi status*
Me:

I can't stop the urge to buy Udemy courses. Help!! If I don't stop, I go broke cause I'm still aiming for a job.

Yay 1week vacation starts now... 1 week of "not my problem, go figure out and fix it urself"

Though I can't guarantee I won't see a bigger burning pile of crap when I get back...

Dear bug,
Can you please just go away? I'm away from home right now so I can't do much, I did a lot yesterday to try and get you to leave. Thank

When you make a mistake and try to fix it, but you can't remember how to spell amend...

git commit --ammend
error: unknown command `amend'

git commit -ammend
[branch-name] mend

Huh?

git log
commit #
mend

Created a new commit with message 'mend'. Now to clean this all up and go get some sleep!

Stuck in devRant. Can't motivate to go to sleep.

Tfw can't go back to JAVA after using C# and LINQ.

Go fuck yourself make.

Don't tell me you haven't got a build rule for a .hex file because I'm fucking looking at it. I added a single file name to a variable and now magically you can't find any of my fucking build rules.

NOT FUCKING HELPFUL MAKE.

Watch a privacy video. See how Google use all your datas. Switch on DuckDuckGo. Feel private. Can't find how to go home drunk. Switch to google.

Oh man, I fucked up...
I was doing after hours work for client, setup website with https.

Can't work over sftp with current user,so I give it the same user ID as apache, get files transferred and shit.
Go back to change uid, set wrong uid, now my user is ntp, I can't get into root, can't set password...
I fucked up

Tail between the legs, sent email to clients support, asking them to fix my user fuck up, waiting for reply

Do i look like a retarded weeb? Yes I do.

Can I go out and get a haircut cut? No I can't.

Trying out Exercism - The learning curve is fucking massive - and they don't warn ou about not being able to go to mentored mode from independent mode, and you can''t leave a track to counter this, and can't delete an account...

Why Nintendo why??!

Why can't you make a normal Pokémon game like in the Gameboy for Mobile Devices!

Pokémon Go is good but I miss the old one. Too much today I guess.

I HAVE BEEN CALLED TO 3 OF THE FINEST HACKATHONS IN MY COUNTRY RN, 2 BEING ORGANISED BY HUGE COMPANIES AND ONE BY A COOL COLLEGE. I CAN'T GO BECAUSE FUCKING INFOSYS IS COMING TO MY COLLEGE FOR PLACEMENTS AND MY TEAM MEMBERS ARE NOW BACKING OFF. WTF.

Why can't I ever install a distro in one try..?
☹️

Not sure how to fix this one.. 😐

..
I refuse to go back to Windows..

It's oddly satisfying to see other devs rant about the shit they go through. And yet, I can't deal with the shit that people rant on non-dev related on Facebook.

Why can't Intel play Pokémon Go?
Because Intel inside. 😁😂

Manager: no you can't go to that conference. It's to expensive.

Next week...

Manager: so I'm going on this conference and you need to make sure nothing goes wrong here. Bye!

I am actually kind of starting to see reacts usefulness and opportunities, but just can't let go the thought that many are blocking javascript, so those would be barred from the resulting site, doesn't that bother anybody else? or is that just generally ignored?

Pokémon GO can't touch this.

It is exactly 4 in the morning and instead of sleeping i am crying so hard because the regret of going to college is eating me alive..... I feel like such a wasted fucking potential, a failure who can't provide money for my family in need because i focus studying shit i will never use for over 4 fucking years....... I can not fucking describe how much i regret going to college, i can safely say i would rather go and fucking die than go to fucking college........ Can't even sleep from this fucking bullshit i feel i am wasting my fucking life and losing my fucking mind on this.............

Can we get a translator bot? I can't copy paste the text in app, so every time I want to translate some rant, I have to copy rant link, open it elsewhere, copy the text, and then go translate it.

Like, bots must do it easier and faster, right?

Today we learned:

Don't run a backup integrity check on terabytes of data in multiple jobs your cpu can't handle.

And i cannot abort the process...

Guess i have to go outside, in the cold, brrrr.

CppCon2017 is COMING guys!! All these crazy speakers and conference! I won't say their names because they are too many x) But... FUCK ! That's the only moment I wish I lived in USA... No streaming, can't go... Only one thing to do, wait the upload on YouTube...
When I see people hyped about GoT or whatever... Guys this is the REAL HYPE!!!

Duolingo used to be better. New updates and restrictions are shit. Specially the whole "take a heart away for a mistake, five mistakes and you can't use the app for hours". Like, I get it, you couldn't manage the traffic. But this is ridiculous. Also, where did the lesson overviews go?

when your devrant stickers show up, but you can't decide where to put them.... and your SO keeps trying to steal them

if you're reading this, go post joey's code yourself

Friend of mine had a perfect day today:

It's 3am, you're coding hard, can't even see properly, but you know only a two or three proper lines and you are finished. A few minutes later you set your pc to hibernate because you can't go further and go to sleep.

In the morning/noon you log in, see only a mess. Half of the new variables are probably obfuscated or in some alien language because you can't read that shit and a cherry on the top - 1/4 of a _big_ test suite reports errors. What a lovely day.

hey yahoo why don't you just go fuck yourself

you literally can't make this stuff up

2024: year of the fever dream

One of my girlfriend's goal is to learn whatever web development languages I know and help me work on projects. I can't express how happy I am, I just hope this doesn't go badly though. :/

The best AH-HA moment is the ones that you just can't get your mind around and then go for a coffee break.

Come back to your desk and then ... bam! There it is!

Thanks, coffee ☕

Mom: hey I can't get into the phone, the PIN and PUK aren't working. See if you can fix it otherwise you'll have to go to the communications company to ask for a new card (my mom is working and can't do it)
Me: //gives it another try. Doesn't work. Searches online. Yep, can't do anything, it needs a new card
Me: sorry mom, you have to get a new card, there's nothing I can do.
Mom: OK
Me: why did you ask me for help, again?
Mom: well because you can do things and fix things and so, and I thought that maybe you could fix it
Me: 😑

I have a strict rule about putting my computer away by 7pm.

I've found that if I get started on something, no matter how stupid it is, I will stay up all night working on something. If I try to quit, I go to bed and can't sleep because I'm still thinking about it.

Setting a time gives my brain time to let go before it's time to go to bed.

Can't believe Pokemon Go posts are flooding even DevRant

"We value your privacy, that's why we want you to agree to all of these tracking cookies."

Fucking GDPR, is getting on my nerves now, can't go anywhere without encountering a cookie wall.

Swapped the F10 and F11 keys on sister's keyboard. She can't figure out why F11 won't go Fullscreen

Dev and marriage, dev and marriage
It's an institute you can't disparage
Choosing code over chores and no one's angry
But sometimes you can go quite hungry

Dev and marriage, dev and marriage...

The agenda app I downloaded has a bug now.. can't select the day of the month from the calendar... Have to go swiping from page to page until I get where I want :/

C++ developer: alright, this should finally fix it. Please just compile so I can go to sleep

GCC: I'm sorry Dave. I can't let you do that.

THEN THERES THE USUAL SEGFAULT WITH NO STACKTRACE AND I SPEND THE REST OF MY NIGHT VALGRINDING

FUCK YOU WORDPRESS wtffff with that shit , i can't use multisite if running in 8081 port ?, fuck you! your """ cli """, your media folder with that month and year stupid subfolders, your plugins and your fucking unit test running on a complete WP instance. GO FUCK YOURSELF! stop with that shit and remake all that shit.

Why the hell do we always have to go into the settings to set a sleep timer in Google Play Music... Can't Google just put a button in the menu where the song is playing.....
Also you can't open the left panel from main music page coz it causes the song to change....

PS: My First Rant

I can't work
I can't sleep
I can't eat
I can't code
I can't go have fun
I can't have a conversation

Because I've got a new exciting idea "💡" buzzing all over my mind all the time.

It's been 9 days already and it's still exciting, probably even more. I think that means it might be worth going ahead and realising it.

Took the day and rebuilt my home network with no major issues along the way.

Migrated to a new NAS and gave a Raspberry Pi a new life as a PiHole + DHCP.

Rant: Why can't things always go this smoothly on my projects? 😎

>client: it's just a small change, on a live site, that can't ever go down, EVER

>looks in source it's modification of core files, oh yay :'(

Fuck me why do my unit tests pass with garbage input.

I can't go into a long weekend with this shit in my head rent free.

When you can't understand your own code but then u finally go through it and understand

Co-workers.
I can't go 30 minutes without being interrupted.

It's not the cable
It can't possibly be the cable
It was the cable

apparently non-moving slack CAT5e can go bad overnight

Popped into a general tutorial meeting on zoom. (for work)

Now I'm stuck midway and I want to bail and go do other things but don't want to be rude to the speaker. 😛

Can't even sneak out of this with the excuse of going to restroom. 🤦🏻‍♀️

And now we have Kotlin Native. Life can't get better right? lets see how this will go T_T

Really excited to go to Google IO really can't wait.

Error: Can't find Python executable "C:\Users\*****\AppData\Local\Programs\Python\Python36-32\python.EXE", you can set the PYTHON env variable.

hmmm what if I go to that location

Python 3.6.4 (v3.6.4:d48eceb, Dec 19 2017, 06:04:45) [MSC v.1900 32 bit (Intel)] on win32

ಠ_ಠ

I just fucked myself big time with iptable rules and blocked all incoming connections to my WiFi-AP. No SSH, can't go back, time for a factory-reset...

My phone is officially losing charge with TurboCharge and I can't turn it off as alarms won't go off..
Might need to return to my old *shivers* iPhone

I think I might actually have an addiction to code :S. I can't go a day without writing something just get a feeling niggling at me to write even if I don't know what to. I just opened a terminal on the nearest computer to write 'ls' and had such a relieving feeling, this can't be healthy.

"There's a branch on terraform-our-project called instance-rols"

"Can you send me a link?"

OMG are you really so fucking lazy you can't go to the fucking git web interface, look up the damn project and click on the fucking branch?

I still have old crusty ass 5.1 Lollipop on my phone because I can't let go of the adorable blob emojis. So many good memories.

But now I can't update apps anymore -- can anyone tell a dummy like me how to upgrade from Lollipop to just Marshmallow, nothing newer (to retain the Marshmallow blobs)?

For the past 19 years of life, I've loved Thanksgiving break because it was an escape from school or a job I hated. But now that I work as a dev, I miss working on my project and can't wait to go back!

Read as

I can't reach java

Should go to sleep...

AM 01:06

I have to go onto windows to do something that Linux can't do. Should I be worried about all the updates? (particularly worried about them overwriting my other partitions since I dual-booted)

It wont go down, he said, it can't crash he said,
several DDoS later
You won your coffee and honor,
Touchè

I complain a lot when I'm coding, but at the end of the day I just love it all and can't let go.

Jinja2 is so awful compared to simple and elegant erb, but you can't go over python whitespace limitations.

Time for some bad puns I made up with my coworker when we were stuck in traffic. Got any dev puns of your own? Share them here!

Why is it called Python if it isn't a snake?
Why is it called Ruby if I can't put it on my jewellery?
Why is it called Rust if it's so clean?
Why is it called Go if it stays in the same place?
Why is it called Perl if it's so ugly?
Why is it called C# if I can't write music with it?
Why can't I drink Java?

can't believe I'm so eager to go to work early today (to download windows 10 anniversary update)

ps- my office internet >> home

Fuck I am to stupid to set up an ubuntu.

I just installed ubuntu as a dual boot on my notebook.
But now I can't boot it.
I mean I can boot it but only if I go to recovery mode first.

Any Idea what I could do?

😶🤢🤮 Crap I have a stomach ache today and vomited while I was taking a shower. Suspecting that this is related to Acid Reflux. Sigh I need to reduce my coffee intake. I want to go to work today but I can't due to unbearable pain. I hope this will lessen later because I'll go later to the hospital for a check up.

C'mon bob..you can't go null

What to do against chronic back-aching?

The tips on the internet ain't helpful and the doc can't go out of drunk state.

Dev read full content if can
.
.
.
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No u can't go forward...[read more]

(where did I go wrong...)
I LOST MY PHONE

Can we get a 'designRant' app?

I just... I just can't listen to their fuckery in my angry little devRant paradise. I'll go nuts.

- You know, I have been showed proofs that there are half days where you almost pushed anything, if nothing, you haven't been productive these days

First off, bitch, I'd like to see you try to make something useful from Drupal.
Second, apologizes but you can't commit nervous breakdowns. Can't say I haven't try.

I want to learn a new backend-language, but can't decide which one.
I already know Go and have basic knowledge of Python and Java.
Which one should I learn?
Doesn't matter what kind of language.

Android buttons are the fucking worst thing to deal with when using Xamarin. FUCK YOU ANDROID BUTTONS I DONT WANT YOUR SHITTY DEFAULT PADDING THAT I CAN'T GET RID OF YOU CAN GO FUCK OFF.

Me at my new job: Can I please install a version controlling system to keep my codes organized?

Boss: why do you need it? can't you just navigate the directories?

Me: I will go mad in 2 years!
....
Opens VS 2019 ... sees Local Git Repo system... mind blown!!! :O

Well week 1 with fedora and... yeah think I'll be going back to elementary after giving void linux a go.

Can't quite place why I don't like fedora, it's smooth and lightweight but just... Eh...

Can't believe that the debate between using space vs tab is still going on. Tab is the way to go people.

Does anyone's productivity ever go down as they can't stop admiring the thing you're building?

When I forget to put a small project I'm working on onto my USB or the cloud so I can't access it when I'm on the go. :'(

Trying to understand why do I have a course on Software Engineering which consists 80% of lectures on what Agile and Scrum mean.

Why can't we get to implement a project and work on agile as we go? 😐😣

From few months I was coding late night like 3 to 4 AM but now I can't sleep at night at all 🥺 shit man some time I just think through this and go to mountains 😞

Why can't GO just have arrays. Why do I have to learn new things like slices :(

oh boy, here we go again, another hacker news "who is hiring" thread... can't wait to be ghosted / ignored by a dozen+ companies...

🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡🙄🤡

Just attended my first conference and it was awesome! So many new ideas, but also tired and overloaded. Can't decide if I should code tonight, go to bed early, or just do something mindless.

That fucking awesome feeling when you go to a Mozilla Code RSprint and the next day you get decide to build firefox and get it done right in the 1st try. Guys thats something which i can't just explain.
FOSS I adore you!

Must be nice when product managers can go on two week vacations across Europe but you can't take one because you have a deadline.

The button radius for the Android Pie pill and back button really pisses me off.

I can't tell you how many times my fat ass finger has accidentally pressed home trying to go back in an app.

Having said that, it's still a looot better than the old soft buttons.

Does any of you know, what happens to Go-routines, when they are deadlocked by waiting on a channel and the channel isn't reachable anymore?
I'd assume they get garbage-collected since they'd just a few KB of memory when not in use but I can't find anything on it online.

There we go again...
I can't remember how many times I saw something like this. It seems like ignorance already become a new standard in IT recruit world😎
Should I give a thumbs up just for daring to ask?!

Can I go to CTO and demand that he will demote a "senior engineer" (who takes senior's paycheck) who don't know what "race condition" is, and how to design/deal with it?

Why? Why I can't?

on Monday i finally decided to go to Control Panel and uninstall Visual Studio :)

i can't express the joy i felt minutes ago when the uninstall popup decided to appear -_-

Fucking MQTT, go suck some dicks! Can't get that pice of shit to work, sending connect and publish works like a charm but somehow I won't get an acknowledge message which means the publish doesn't go through!
On the brigt side: another oportunity to fire up wireshark and compare my software to other tools.

Anyone expirienced wit MQTT or thingstream.io

P.s. there support also can go and choke on some dicks!

I'm loving the fact that it's summer, I'm stuck in a windowless office, and everybody is complaining that the weather sucks and they can't go to the beach.

You can't even share an Excel sheet properly but you want me to believe you're qualified to be the build manager...this should go real well

I always start with a personal need. I can't really commit to projects that I wouldn't use myself. Once I have the need, I spend days trying to Google if it exists, and if not, I go ahead. (Then sometimes I find out later that it does exist, it's just that they suck at SEO.)

Boss calls a team leads meeting which is just me and the other guy. Rest are product or project managers.

Turns out they concerns over how our last few sprints are always left unfinished as the work in it doesn't get passed QA.

Tried to tell him how can devs work on something that failed QA on the last day of the sprint.

We have one QA person who tests 20 something devs work. We are massively under resourced and yet they want us to do everything and always end up making promises to clients that we can't keep coz our sprint doesn't have capacity.

Yet they are hiring more product managers instead of getting some more QA help.

Sick & tired of this shit.

Story of my life
Out of habit added .gitignore now can't pull from mainline. Go for deleting the file accidentally deleted .git

When you love iPads but can't let go of Nokia.

I hate having a project to go on with but not being able to :(

For example: I have a project that I want to work on, but I'm currently fixing HDDs and I can't use my computer (which is a backup, therefore quite slow). And I can't stop the HDD recovery process unless I want to start again later.

PS: Am I the only one who deletes his most recent rant when he thinks he has something better to say, and the cooldown is still not over?

today is one of those days were work is just a grind
that moment you are interested in nothing, can't find a good tune either and just want to go home and sleep (although you fear even that might not work)

Coinbase is a miserable clock sucker...

You can't understand that your stupid app doesnt split sir names during ID verification? A month of playing ring around the support email bot... "Try updating chrome!"...

Go duck yourself,
John S Jr. Smith

I have hard time focusing at all. I can't even focus 100% when I am driving my bike. My mind tend to go other issues or thoughts when I am doing anything in my life.

Any tip to improve my focus on the current task.

I hate it when I go to bed early to sleep early but can't sleep a blink for some unknown reason & I just move left & right hoping to fall asleep any minute but end up not being able to sleep at all the whole night :(
whyyyyyy? why cant humans sleep within seconds like a computer???? :(