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Learnt Murphy's law the hard way,
Don't use your office laptop to create a personal auto porn downloading project specially when your boss suddenly wants to use your laptop to do a product demo to client.
Now looking for a new job, let me know if anyone need a smart developer who loves solving problems like the one mentioned above.26 -
[Client]
We've noticed we gave you the wrong product prices for our new online shop.
[Dev]
Yeah, just login to the backend and fix them.
[Client]
But we don't want to use your fancy backend, we'll be using anyway soon - we want EXCEL!
Could you send us an EXCEL, so we can fix that?
How much will this cost?
[Dev]
Sure... here you are.
Not that much, takes about an hour.
[Client]
Great, you'll hear from us in a few days.
(a few months later...)
[Client]
We've finally managed to update the EXCEL. And btw, we've also added a bunch of columns with product pictures and new properties, highlighted products to delete red, inserted some comments with manual instructions and basically destroyed the entire data structure of this table.
Before I forget... also make sure to get this finished today, we have to go live ASAP. Our marketing campaign is already live.
[Dev]
Well, I'm sorry to say this, but this is not possible.
I'm currently working on another project and it will take me hours to clean up the data you sent me, before even starting to build an import tool for the new data you provided. Better stop the campaign and I'll do my best to get this done by the end of the week. Also it may be a bit costly.
(angry client calls immediately...)
(dev transfers to manager...)
(client transfers to client's boss...)
[Manager]
Ok Dev, I think I was able to explain it to them. However, it would be great if you spend day and night to get this thing out ASAP.
[Dev]
No problem...
I'll just do it by hand to get this out immediately.
(few days later; nearly done, exhausted)
[Client]
Hey Dev, here's another EXCEL.
We've just noticed there were a bunch of errors in the previous one. Please use this instead...
13 -
Me, a junior dev: * reports an important issue and a possible fix *
Senior dev 1: nah, it'll do just fine.
Senior dev 2: that won't be an issue, don't you see? It's under control, man.
Senior 3: why are you even here? Why are you even talking?
Manager: yeah, what could possibly go wrong?
* a year after releasing the product, one of the seniors got fired and another one was hired *
New senior: this thing is bananas, code is inconsistent and there's memory leaks everywhere, how does that even work?
Me: nobody believed me when I said that.
Manager: it did work very well, where's the issue?
Me: it's everywhere, goddammit! Don't you see?
New senior: junior dev is right.
Me: I've been a WHOLE YEAR saying that!
Manager: did you? Really? Nah, you didn't.
...
I'm tired of this shit.15 -
Meeting with smooth suit guy:
"So, our company has pivoted"
I hate everything about this guy, not having slept well at all, I fucking snapped:
"Pivoted? Oh wow, what a wonderfully refined word to describe that your asinine business model smacked flat into the mud, that your obtuse bubble of vague ideas popped and your childish dreams of piles of undeserved gold got caught up by the hard reality that your product does not add any tangible value -- yet you tricked your sheepish retarded investors once again to fall for a new hype-filled pitch deck? Congratulations. At least you probably snort enough coke to keep believing in yourself..."
The guy nervously wiped his nose, stuttered, and walked off looking angry and a little confused.
So it turns out, my boss is apparently the major "sheepish retarded investor" in this company.
Today I got a mail from him. I expected fire and fury, nuclear ICBMs crashing into my desk.
"Thanks for your feedback, this is why I invite you to meetings. Could you take a look at their new pitch slides and preliminary API docs for me?"15 -
Every new product these days has the tag line "powered by AI"
FUCK OFF
No it isn't.
A mass of "if" statements isn't AI!16 -
1 - Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
2 - Product is tested. 20 bugs are found.
3- Programmer fixes 10 of the bugs and explains to the testing department that the other 10 aren’t really bugs.
4 - Testing department finds that five of the fixes didn’t work and discovers 15 new bugs.
5 - Due to marketing pressure and an extremely premature product announcement based on overly-optimistic programming schedule, the product is released.
6 - Users find 137 new bugs.
7 - Newly-assembled programming team fixes almost all of the 137 bugs, but introduce 456 new ones.
8 - Entire testing department gets fired.
9 - Company is bought in a hostile takeover by competitor using profits from their latest release, which had 783 bugs.
10 - New CEO is brought in by board of directors. He raises the programming team's salary to redo the program from scratch.
11 - Programmer produces code he believes is bug-free.
12 - fml9 -
"Personalized Advertisements":
No Amazon, I'm not interested in buying any of these phones, I just bought a new one five days ago, remember? You sold it to me! And stop recommending the same book I already got five YEARS ago!
YouTube, why are you always showing me the same ad about an app I already own and use regularly? And why the FUCK do I you show me the new trailer of Star Wars Ep8 as an ad video before the actual video of the new Star Wars Ep8 trailer?
Audi, I am an university student, barely able to pay my rent, why are you telling me to buy your newest car? How do you expect me to afford this?
Monster, why exactly are you showing me job offers as "Technical Product Designer at company X" for which I'm not remotely qualified or even interested in?
Neither do I have 5000£ (I live in Germany, at least match the currency, ffs) to invest in some suspiciously promising stock market schemes, nor am I in any need of rheumatism pills or a hearing aid (I am 19). I cannot afford or want any Rolex watches and PLEASE, I don't know why you think I would, but I really do not need a special new and innovative brand of tampons, my dick is doing fine, thanks.
"Hot local singles near {my actual location} want to fuck!
Click here!!!"
At least there are still some ads you can trust to be relevant...14 -
So i've been a dev manager for a little while now. Thought i'd take some time to disambiguate some job titles to let everyone know what they might be in for when joining / moving around a big org.
Title: Senior Software Engineer
Background:
- Technical
- Clever
- Typically has years experience building what management are trying to build
Responsibilities:
- Building new features
- Writing code
- Code review
- Offering advice to product manag......OH NO YOU DON'T CODE MONKEY, BACK TO WORK!
Title: Dev Manager
Background:
- Technical
- Former/current programmer
- knows his/her way around a codebase.
Responsibilities:
- Recruiting / interviewing new staff
- Keeping the team focused and delivering tasks
- Architecture decisions
- Lying about complexity of architecture decisions to ensure team gets the actual time they need
- Lying about feature estimations to ensure team gets to work on critical technical improvements that were cancelled / de-prioritised
- Explaining to hire-ups why we can't "Just do it quicker"
- Explaining to senior engineers why the product manager declined their meeting request
Title: Product / Product Manager
Background:
- Nothing relevant to the industry or product line what so ever
- Found the correct building on the day of the interview
- Has once opened an Excel spreadsheet and successfully saved it to a desktop
Responsibilities:
- Making every key decision about every feature available in the app
- Learning to ignore that inner voice we like to call "Common sense"
- Making sure to not accidentally take some advice from technical staff
- Raising the blood pressure of everyone below them / working with them
Title: Program Lead / Product Owner
Background:
- Capable of speech
- Aware of what a computer is (optional)
Responsibilities:
- Sitting down
- Talking
- Clicking random buttons on Jira
- Making bullet point lists
Title: Director of Software Engineering
Background:
- Allegedly attended college/university to study computer science
- Similar to a technical product manager (technical optional)
Responsibilities:
- Reports directly to VP
- Fixes problems by creating a different problem somewhere else as a distraction
- Claiming to understand and green light technical decisions, while having already agreed with product that it will never happen9 -
I just love it when my coworkers talk (troll) about Google Ultron like it's the answer for everything in front of a new dev and he's getting more and more confused thinking "what's this awesome Google product I've never heard about"
And we just know that within the next 30 minutes he will have tears in his eyes of laughing after reading the story and probably also has it 'installed' (like some other devs) on his desktop (http://imgur.com/gallery/W9Pnh)
Have a good chuckle if you haven't read it before:
http://imgur.com/gallery/iJD8f
http://imgur.com/a/AOz0d
Don't forget to download your adobe reader guys.
7 -
Welcome back to practiseSafeHex's new life as a manager.
Episode 2: Why automate when you can spend all day doing it by hand
This is a particularly special episode for me, as these problems are taking up so much of my time with non-sensical bullshit, that i'm delayed with everything else. Some badly require tooling or new products. Some are just unnecessary processes or annoyances that should not need to be handled by another human. So lets jump right in, in no particular order:
- Jira ... nuff said? not quite because somehow some blue moon, planets aligning, act of god style set of circumstances lined up to allow this team to somehow make Jira worse. On one hand we have a gigantic Jira project containing 7 separate sub teams, a million different labels / epics and 4.2 million possible assignees, all making sure the loading page takes as long as possible to open. But the new country we've added support for in the app gets a separate project. So we have product, backend, mobile, design, management etc on one, and mobile-country2 on another. This delightfully means a lot of duplication and copy pasting from one to the other, for literally no reason what so ever.
- Everything on Jira is found through a label. Every time something happens, a new one is created. So I need to check for "iOS", "Android", "iOS-country2", "Android-country2", "mobile-<feature>", "mobile-<feature>-issues", "mobile-<feature>-prod-issues", "mobile-<feature>-existing-issues" and "<project>-July31" ... why July31? Because some fucking moron decided to do a round of testing, and tag all the issues with the current date (despite the fact Jira does that anyway), which somehow still gets used from time to time because nobody pays attention to what they are doing. This means creating and modifying filters on a daily basis ... after spending time trying to figure out what its not in the first one.
- One of my favourite morning rituals I like to call "Jira dumpster diving". This involves me removing all the filters and reading all the tickets. Why would I do such a thing? oh remember the 9000 labels I mentioned earlier? right well its very likely that they actually won't use any of them ... or the wrong ones ... or assign to the wrong person, so I have to go find them and fix them. If I don't, i'll get yelled at, because clearly it's my fault.
- Moving on from Jira. As some of you might have seen in your companies, if you use things like TestFlight, HockeyApp, AppCenter, BuddyBuild etc. that when you release a new app version for testing, each version comes with an automated change-log, listing ticket numbers addressed ...... yeah we don't do that. No we use this shitty service, which is effectively an FTP server and a webpage, that only allows you to host the new versions. Sending out those emails is all manual ... distribution groups?? ... whats that?
- Moving back to Jira. Can't even automate the changelog with a script, because I can't even make sense of the tickets, in order to translate that to a script.
- Moving on from Jira. Me and one of the remote testers play this great game I like to call "tag team ticketing". It's so much fun. Right heres how to play, you'll need a QA and a PM.
*QA creates a ticket, and puts nothing of any use inside it, and assigns to the PM.
*PM fires it back asking for clarification.
*QA adds in what he feels is clarification (hes wrong) and assigns it back to the PM.
*PM sends detailed instructions, with examples as to what is needed and assigns it back.
*QA adds 1 of the 3 things required and assigns it back.
*PM assigns it back saying the one thing added is from the wrong day, and reminds him about the other 2 items.
*QA adds some random piece of unrelated info to the ticket instead, forgetting about the 3 things and assigns it back.
and you just continue doing this for the whole dev / release cycle hahaha. Oh you guys have no idea how much fun it is, seriously give it a go, you'll thank me later ... or kill yourselves, each to their own.
- Moving back to Jira. I decided to take an action of creating a new project for my team (the mobile team) and set it up the way we want and just ignore everything going on around us. Use proper automation, and a kanban board. Maybe only give product a slack bot interface that won't allow them to create a ticket without what we need etc. Spent 25 minutes looking for the "create new project" button before finding the link which says I need to open a ticket with support and wait ... 5 ... fucking ... long ... painful ... unnecessary ... business days.
... Heres hoping my head continues to not have a bullet hole in it by then.
Id love to talk more, but those filters ain't gonna fix themselves. So we'll have to leave it here for today. Tune in again for another episode soon.
And remember to always practiseSafeHex13 -
Installed VS Code, have to say, i like it a lot. Even though it's a Microsoft product.
My new favorite editor.28 -
Me: Boss, your new project is ready, we've tested the technical aspect but we're waiting on your approval before deploying, will you test it?
Boss: yeah sure, I'll test it in 5
*2 weeks later*
Boss: why isn't that project deployed yet?
Me: you haven't tested it, and we haven't gotten approval
Boss: oh right, I'll go test it right now!
*2 weeks later*
Boss: I NEED that project to go live RIGHT THIS MOMENT!!!
Me: sure, have you tested it yet?
Boss: nope, but I need it
Me: well, I'll put it live, but me and my colleagues are shifting responsibility to you, since you haven't tested it. Are you sure?
Boss: yeah, yeah whatever...
*put product online*
*2 days later*
Angry call from boss, bugs have been found, tell him that he approved the state of the product and that the bugs will go on the to-do list...
Boss is extremely pissed, but recognized his mistake...
Now, the boss actually tests everything thoroughly at the moment we tell him to! No more bugs, complaints, and I got a raise!5 -
Man, we have a snake in our company.
This snake is responsible for terrible code. They oversee a offshore team, but hold them to no coding practices. They don't do code reviews or checks. They let them be lazy and get away with sloppy work every time.
And if you critize their team - they will defend them and get angry at you. You can't adress the problem because said snake is always around. He's in a senior position for giving our company cheap workers, doing years of damage to our product while the non-code savvy managers remain blissfully unaware of their product being ruined in the background.
This snake is the senior product office. He has a share in the company now. He is from the overshore team's country. That team now has their claws so dug into our companies roots and are just pumping lsd's into it constantly. Feels good untill you die from an overdose.
Here I am, the new junior software developer, trying to tear out the claws that have sunk into these roots. Im up against the snake. The snake hates me. I hate the snake. I am trying to open the eyes of the managers. They hate that. They want to silence me so I don't expose the awful, unprofessional level of work they do.
Well, that's too bad. I won't back down from this, snake.14 -
After 10 months of development we bring the first prototype of our awesome new product to show it to the board of directors. Whereupon the chairman of the board angrily shouts at us "has nobody told you we cancelled this project a month ago?!"
I left two months later, they went bankrupt a year later.4 -
Had a follow up meeting today to resolve the issue of Product ignoring our comments about possible issues, better ways to do it etc.
New rules:
- We are allowed to suggest to Product that they might be doing something wrong
- We are not allowed to tell product they are doing something wrong
- If Product don’t listen, that’s fine, we will document our comments to protect us later.
Conclusion:
Product are too sensitive to have a conversation with. We are now going to let them fuck everything up, make some notes and say “I told you so” at a later date.
Maturity at its finest ladies and gentlemen.5 -
A recruiter called today.
A new job proposal. Higher salary, manage some 5 men team, DevOps buzzwords, cool product, great conditions but then she says "and we're working only in Windows environment".
My ears ringed "only in windows env".. "only windows"... "windooowwssss".
"Nope, thanks, have a good day!" - hung up.18 -
Our product owner's equivalent of "It's not a bug, it's a feature" seems to be "It's not a new requirement, it's a clarification."
:-/2 -
A little while ago, the concierge of my apartment building came to me about some issue with the central heating system. Totally unaware about the issue, I let him check some things in the apartment. Then he told me that apparently my thermostat has been turned off all the time. So I think that my servers may very well have been the primary source of heat for this apartment for several weeks. Servers, the new type of central heating system that even does useful work in the process!! Can we get some wanketeers on this to make it a product? 🙃7
-
A new urgent request today…
“ITS URGENT WE NEED THIS CODE IN IMMEDIATELY I DONT CARE IF ITS FRIDAY WE NEED IT THERE BY ONE HOUR”
“What is happening?”
“ADD THIS CODE TO OUR CODE”
(A snippet to track marketing conversions from fb)
“Uhhh it’s Friday and our product won’t release to the public for 2 months anyway?”
“YOU DONT GET HOW URGENT IT IS, MUST BE THERE IN AN HOUR OR WE’LL LOSE DATA”
“O….k”
Spoiler: data said that today we had no customers on an unreleased project. Go figure!5 -
Based loosely on the popular "git" command, I am happy to announce my new product, "hit"!
Essentially, hit hooks into "git blame" and automatically slaps the shit out of whoever wrote this garbage.
It uses SOHTTP (Slap Over HTTP) to deliver a nice firm wallop to any subpar script kiddie that had the audacity to come up with this bullshit.
Careful, the user is not immune to the effects8 -
Pro tip: As great as your product is, it's 1000x harder to pitch to my boss when it has a goofy-ass name.
Me: Hey boss, I came across some new software that'll help manage our mission critical database system.
Boss: Oh yeah, what's it called?
Me: WoolySocksDB Enterprise Edition
Boss: 😐... No.4 -
Eh ehe hehe he eh ehehe
On top of burnout, codebase issues, spec issues, burnout, the product butt that keeps on crapping, burnout, burnout, loathing for my employer... My local Apple SSL cert expired. I can’t finish this and push it anywhere for testing. I can’t even run my own specs anymore. And I don’t have permissions to make a new one. I can’t do anything at all.
Ehe he hehe
Deadline is in two days, and I’m just sitting here laughing quietly to myself. I might finally be going crazy
I found a loose bit of tangle, started to pull, and the world decided it was time to fall apart. Reality said it’s time to go. And I wasn’t even a good screwdriver dev. Byeee ~12 -
Ticket: Add <feature> to <thing>. It works in <other things> so just copy it over. Easy.
Thing: tangled, over-complicated mess.
Feature: tangled and broken, and winds much too deep to refactor. Gets an almost-right answer by doing lots of things that shouldn't work but somehow manage to.
I write a quick patch that avoids the decent into madness and duplicates the broken behavior in a simple way for consistency and ease of fixing later. I inform my boss of my findings and push the code.
He gets angry and mildly chews me out for it. During the code review, he calls my patch naive, and says the original feature is obviously not broken or convoluted. During the course of proving me wrong, he has trouble following it, and eventually finds out that it really is broken -- and refuses to admit i was right about any of it. I'm still in trouble for taking too long, doing it naively, and not doing it correctly.
He schedules a meeting with product to see if we should do it correctly. He tells product to say no. Product says no. He then tells me to duplicate the broken behavior. ... which I already did.
At this point I'm in trouble for:
1) Taking too long copying a simple feature over.
2) Showing said feature is not simple, but convoluted and broken.
3) Reimplementing the broken feature in a simpler way.
4) Not making my new implementation correct despite it not working anywhere else, and despite how that would be inconsistent.
Did everything right, still in the wrong.
Also, they decided I'm not allowed to fix the original, that it should stay broken, and that I should make sure it's broken here, too.
You just have to admire the sound reasoning and mutual respect on display. Best in class.19 -
What the fuck!!!!!
Never thought I'd have to rant so soon joining my new org.
Guess the honeymoon phase is over earlier than I anticipated.
1. This company is awesome and employee friendly. They made me kickass deal which I couldn't refuse. However, upon checking glassdoor, I realised they still managed to low ball me. Lol.
But I have no complaints and I am pretty happy with whatever they are offering as of now. My next point is the primary reason I disabled my app blocker to rant out.
2. A junior is leaving and so is my lead. Damn! Fuckkkkkk!!! My lead is super awesome. There's so much dependent on her.
Entire organisation is watching the product line she and I am working on. It's the heart of the entire product.
It's just been a month I joined and so much responsibility on me already. Well, I am not fearing that.
What I am afraid of and rather uncomfortable with is that they are going to hire someone else in a different time zone who'll lead this entire thing and they might map me under that new person who'll be a senior level executive.
Fuck that shit. I don't want to leave my current manager for she is awesome too. With departure of my lead, it's just me and my manager that are left in the team.
I am not sure what the future will be but I know that there are lot of learnings coming my way.
One thing I wish for is that they relocate me for short or mid term to UK or EU. Then a lot of things will be solved for me.
For now, I am just keeping my head low and doing what best I can, which is focusing on work.
Hope they promote me with an amazing salary hike.5 -
Get assigned ticket.
Finish the most of the feature. Finish most of the specs.
Push.
Second dev wants to own accounting half of the ticket.
Rip out half my changes, rewrite specs.
Push.
Code review asks for minor changes.
Finish them.
Push.
Product creep creeps the scope.
Finish the feature again.
Push.
Product creep creep-creeps the scope.
Finish the feature again.
Push.
New release happens.
Merge in master; fix conflicts. Run specs; random unrelated specs fail, some fail intermittently. Rabbit holes of complicated, unexplored, obviously-flawed code.
Fuck that. Push.7 -
Senior manager: I cant understand how this project has taken so long?
Me: Well you hired me as a C# WPF developer and then asked me to deliver an android app without any kind of training so i had to teach myself app development and reverse engineer the undocumented protocol it needs to use to communicate with our product.
Senior manager: Ok. I get that, but it should only take around 3 months to get up to speed though right?
Me (to myself): how in the hell? New platform, self teaching, undocumented protocol for a complex low level real-time system, other responsibilities taking at least 50% of my time and i should be as productive as an outsourced app dev company in 3 months???!! FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!3 -
It hasn't even been two weeks since quitting the clowns and I've:
- recorded and edited a new React TypeScript course
- released a new SaaS product (in alpha)
- cleaned up and optimized the home page of an existing SaaS app
- started a mobile app version of said SaaS app
- started working with an agency to drive more traffic to same said SaaS app including guest posts and content creation.
I guess I always had it in me but needed to be broken by the rate race system one final time before venturing out on my own.
Refreshing.9 -
That moment when you listen to your boss' lies to a client when presenting a new product/feature.
I am like: damn, this guy is a talented actor!3 -
Started my new internship for the summer.
"Hey, our client's prestashop is getting really slow, could you please do something about it ?"
I go poke around to see what i can do, and after some research i see the problem. The search bar was taking 20-60s to load what was sometimes 16 objects.
The client was using a prestashop with the default search engine. 175000 products were registered. NO WONDER IT'S FUCKIN SLOW.
So on my first day of internship i entirely re-coded prestashop's product search function. I feel like this is not internship level stuff.5 -
At my previous job I was told by "senior" devs that my interest in learning new things and knowing more is not a good thing. And that I should learn to increase my depth in the programming of the product that was being used.
As part of my job I was asked to analyze the product's architecture. I found out that it was needlessly complicated and performed horribly. The senior devs that were on that product for a while had been hiding their mess from the rest of the teams. Needless to say, my report didn't make me very popular with them.
I was asked to help come up with a strategy for testing.
A guy who had just joined our company out of college and me worked really hard for a few weeks and managed to bring testing down from 3 months to around 3weeks. Our reward: he was fired(albeit for different reasons. The company was trying to restructure)
My yearly review was terrible and I was put on 2 months probation. So I quit.
It sucked. And made me question my ability as a programmer for a while. I've floated my own firm and though money is hard sometimes, it so much more rewarding.9 -
Designing a new software product: 1000 hours
Designing a logo and picking a color scheme that pleases everyone: 689236323447876 hours1 -
While writing up this quarter's performance review, I re-read last quarter's goals, and found one my boss edited and added a minimum to: "Release more features that customers want and enjoy using, prioritized by product; minimum 4 product feature/bug tickets this quarter."
... they then proceeded to give me, not four+ product tickets, but: three security tickets (two of which are big projects), a frontend ticket that should have been assigned to the designer, and a slow query performance ticket -- on top of my existing security tickets from Q3.
How the fuck was I supposed to meet this requirement if I wasn't given any product tickets? What, finish the monster tickets in a week instead of a month or more each and beg for new product tickets from the product manager who refuses to even talk to me?
Fuck these people, seriously.8 -
Product owner:
Okay we have users and groups. Users have roles, roles have permissions, but groups can also have roles or permissions. Clients have users and these client-users can have special kinds of permissions. Now we need to add projects which have pages and special project users who manage the projects, but only the client-users can set rights for which project owners can manage pages. Pages are coupled to roles, and assigned to workflows, unless the client-user already had the permission to... wait where are you going?"
Me: "Fetching a new SSD. I ran out of hard disk space trying to model the database design. Could you please start from the top when I get back?"5 -
So recently we re-orged to a product vs engineering (yes, I meant vs, it’s contentious) organizational structure. One of the former dev leads got picked for product and went on this lovely ass-kissing spiel about how great this was in front of our new bosses. The next day(!) he was telling his old team what to do directly to his buddy the scrum master, who works for me and casually mentioned it. How am I supposed to run engineering and deliver if every P.O. can end run around the structure? I hate all this.
Also, if the new PE tells me one more time all my problems can be solved with SQS, I’m gonna explode. Not all dev problems are a nail to fix with an sns hammer. Asynch comms has its uses, it is not the *only solution.
I feel like I’m over reacting, and yet, I still feel rage…and happy to find an anonymous place to rant about it.
11 -
6 months ago I had to implement a new feature and realized that a related uploading feature was broken if you choose a specific service to upload to.
I was wondering why nobody had reported this, so I took a look at the usage of said feature and it seems literally no client ever used it since it was released almost 2 years ago.
Only the product owner used it in the beginning... only for testing it...
2 weeks well spend.5 -
"Older versions are more stable"
The whole concept of LTS in development pisses me off.
Delayed upgrading, whether it's the language itself, dependencies or tooling, does just one thing: It makes future upgrading way more difficult, often to the point where the company eventually runs into this maintainability wall, and gets stuck in old, unsupported versions.
"But... stability!" — The tiny chance that the newer version has such serious stability regressions that it negatively impacts your own product doesn't weigh up against the clusterfuck you fall into if you push the task too far into the future.
You can relatively easily assess a new major language version using benchmarks and unit tests. Predicting the repercussions of staying on PHP 5.4 or Python 2.7 for another year, predicting the impact of upgrading the codebase later, that is almost impossible.
I'm not saying you should live on the bleeding edge in production, but as soon as a new stable version of a core technology is released, just fucking drop everything you're doing and port those deprecated methods!7 -
>>>> Followed link to a post
* Do you Accept Cookies?: Yes
* Our customer supports online: Okay, I know
* Subscribe to Newsletters?: Click Click Accept
* Website wants to turn on Notification?: Okay
* Seen Our New Product?: No, not today
* We require you to be over 18?: Yes, I am
* We value your privacy?: I Agree
* Looks like you're using ad-Blocker?: Turn Off
* Don't forget to follow us on...: Okay!!! I get it already, just show me the f*cking post!
* What next
***** 1 million ads appear around a single post broken to bits having (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9 next>>) *****
Just wondering who invented this money making strategy.8 -
Managements definition of an MVP:
- Integrate our backend and database with a similar-ish, older internal system built on a different tech stack and different rules.
- Merge the functionality and delete the old one.
- Modify our system to accept 2 types of logged in users.
- Have 2 versions of our API that return different values.
- Update our mobile app to render different data based on which user is logged in.
- Onboard the old system users to this new system.
My definition of an MVP:
- Tell the store we are taking over, that they have to print their labels from our tool, and onboard the users to our app.9 -
Before I left for vacation two weeks ago, I busted my butt to build out another portion of my frontend testing framework and get it in place (and spec’d) to unblock a coworker on a semi-high-priority ticket. I sent him detailed notes on which areas of the product it covers, how to use it, and copied one of his (blocked) tests over and updated it to use the new methods, pattern, namespacing, etc.
I came back today and discovered … he hasn’t even touched it. Everything is exactly as I left it.
Wheeeeeee.12 -
Dear fanboys (and probably past and I hope not future me),
Just because I use alternative product doesn’t mean you can attack me personally. And because you use some service/product doesn’t mean it’s automatically fitting for all people or it’s perfect and doesn’t have any cons.
Just because you use X thing and you’re happy with it (which is perfectly OK), doesn’t mean I can’t be perfectly happy with Y thing.
Imagine if only legal haircut was yours favorite. Wouldn’t be that boring if everyone wore exact same haircut? That’s like some 1984 shit.
I’m not saying that criticizing things is bad - it’s great actually, but in civilized way.
Don’t attack a person using something and automatically assume that they are an idiots, but rather point out why that something is bad.
And please, be different. If you’re happy with that phone which you use, don’t go buy a new one just because someone told you that your current one is bad without pointing out why.
Sincerely,
Athlon
No one is gonna care anyways...8 -
So my boss is staring a new security oriented product and he asked one of my colleagues to prepare a presentation about the possible attacks on the product.
During the presentation there was a section on DoS attacks. The boss didn't know what DoS was and after a brief explanation, he interrupted the presentation and said DDoS is not a threat because there is no data stolen. This is a webapp.6 -
So finished a project for a client, the client signed a contract. He signed off that all milestones where reached. Text me that he was very pleased.
We give 30 days to pay. 8 days before the due date he asked for a meeting, telling us he wants to go another direction and he wants the source code to show the new development team he's going with to get a quote from them. I tell him that, that's fine he can have the source files once he pays for the product which was in the contract they signed mind you!! And this FUCKING DICK FART threats to sue, saying he's calling his lawyer, threatening me and my development partner with physical violence, and saying he's going to sue me personally not because me work was bad but because I refused to give him the product before he paid. I was calm we offered to meet his new dev team explain the code, and show them what they needed to see to give the clients a quote and they would not allow that, saying how now I'm not getting paid instead I'm getting sued and that he will publicly shame my startup company. Just complete bullshit, good thing I saved the original contract he wanted me to sign which had threats of physical violence I. His contract... Which in retrospect should have been a hint, but it was the highest paying contract we ever landed. Seems he never planned on paying. What's a guy to do?26 -
Dear Product Owners,
If you tell me how I need to architect my software again I'm going to ask you to provide a network topology of the architecture you want me to build.
I'll also need you to request the new servers, work with the ops teams to setup credentials, provision the NAT, register the domains and document the routes that the proxy will need to use.
then I'll need you to hook the repo up to our non-existent pipeline so that I can make sure I won't do all that testing I already can't do.
I hope you're paying attention, because that framework you told me I needed to use is going to be a pain to setup correctly.
after you're done with that, please attach any documentation you shit out to the ticket you never created.
Enragedly yours,
Looking for a new job
PS: get fucked3 -
Email: "We just launched our new web interface! It's so much easier to use, and should make life a lot easier for our users."
Me: Oh good this thing has been unusable since I've been working here. How do I get on the new version? Better read on...
"Download this PDF for more information!"
Erm... ok.
In the (20 page) PDF: "Email this address@example.com to get the URL!"
ffs ok
email: "Thank you for emailing us, you username is benoliver999, your password is 'passow0rd' and the url is in this attached PDF
god help me
(50 page) PDF: "Remember to disable pop up blocker, ad-block and to install Flash"
Today I have started building my own version of this product so we can stop using these idiots.
As an aside, the username 'admin' also had a password of 'passow0rd'...4 -
So...new intern , table paired to mine , get my hopes up that it's hopefully not another stuck up uni kiddo , hopes get ruined . He asked me my name and what I do , when I told him I do product security his reaction was 'oh so you're not a dev ?' . Go.eat.shit.and.choke.with.those.alienware.headphones. he didn't even listen to what I had to say about that , just put on his headphones and ignored me . Prick.11
-
Hey guys, if you have some time, can you provide feedback on a new website I launched. It aggregates online product reviews and applies AI to them.
http://diducheck.com
Do you think this is a useful website? Thanks in advance!32 -
when client sits through a 2h explanation/tutorial for his new CMS and doesn't take any notes.
2 days later, ask where to go to add a product.5 -
Apple's marketing department are just dictionary junkies.
Have you guys read some of the latest Apple quotes for their products? You know, the ones where you visit the page and there's some large bold text summarising the product? Here's a few:
HomePod: "The new sound of home."
If you talk over my Spotify music YOU WILL BECOME THE NEW SOUND OF MY SHED.
iPhone X: "Say hello to the future."
E.Musk put a Tesla in space. Also the future can crash with a single character.
MacOS: "Your Mac. Elevated."
If you fly away I WILL use you as birthday balloon.
iPad Pro: "Anything you can do, you can do better."
SOONER OR LATER *Comment what you would put here*
But I mean hey. It sells right.
Reading it back maybe I'm just blind hating.11 -
Fuck my manager. >_<
I'm a fresher at a medium-sized company. Our team is relatively new and we don't have a dedicated support team for the product the team developed (before I joined the company).
So when I was allocated to the team, I was put into support, citing it as a good learning experience (and it was). But it's been a few months. And the support work got boring and uninteresting, looking at logs which don't say anything, dumps which are completely normal and most of all, dealing with unresponsive OSEs, when they claim the issue is super critical and really tricky.
Anyway, there was this tool (among other things) that had to be developed as a support tool for our product and I ended up being paired with a guy who ended up being in charge of it. We started working on it slowly, designing and implementing a framework for the tool.
This goes without saying, I love development.
4 days later, my manager says "why are you developing it? Who's gonna look at support issues?"
Fucking hell. I was hired to be a developer and you got me just decide to up and shove me into support for the next 3-6 months while others are at least enhancing our shitty ass product? And I can't even quit for another year and a half because I signed a bond!
Oh, the depression.11 -
Boss came in with new project:
boss shows me the design
me: it's a wordpress website ?
boss: client wants it with prestashop
me: but the brief is for an ecommerce website with 2 categories and a blog, wordpress with woocommerce and a blog should be enought
boss: no, client wants it with prestashop
oh I forgot, client wants it in a shared hosting server, where I can't add php extensions
started the project, fucked my weekend with anxiety and depression, and then products list came in ... 15 product
me: ok, I need to get the fuck out quick
I quit, I sleep at night, I smile with my kids ...2 -
My team manager showed me a web application of a new client and asked me if I can find vulnerabilities in it to push for a better product contract. She showed me the system architecture and asked me if I could try finding something from their login page. I politely refused since we don't have written permission to conduct a security audit (it's also a ministry website). She was pretty disappointed and idk if I'm doing the right thing not helping the company (I'm an intern but still). I'm sure I can scan in stealth but I don't think it's ethical on a corporate level. Thoughts?11
-
We are a small size product based company. There was a change in management a year back and the new management decided to fire the entire engineering team one by one. I was hired as full time back-end developer (C++). Just after I joined they removed the last 2 engineers from the previous regime and handed over devops and Python API development to me as well.
There was no documentation for the main product which was a sophisticated piece of software. There were no comments in the code as well. I had to go through line by line (roughly 100,000 lines of code).
Then they decide to hire more devs.Turned out to be false hope. They hired interns who had no programming knowledge.
Now they got two clients who are interested in using the service. They lured them using empty promises. The product is not stable. The cloud infrastructure is not at all ready. The APIs are a mess. I don't know which one to work on.
Worst part is that there is no other technical person in the office.
I'm thinking about quitting now. I don't know why I haven't already.😖😖4 -
Imagine naïvely treating your ONLY full-time employee like a robot that simply accomplishes tasks for you on a whim without even waiting for or even acknowledging their feedback (when that feedback has +10 years of experience of product development over you).
I wonder what it's like to operate at so idiotic a level on a day to day basis.
I don't care if you have all the fucking "vision" in the world, I'm actively searching for new positions, especially the ones that pay me double or triple what I'm earning now. I'm outta here, pronto tonto
Yeah, you founded a fucking company, been there, done that, 2 times even. just shut up6 -
*Presents finished product to client
Client: We won't pay until you add this new feature that was never in the original specs.
*One week later after adding new feature
Client: Uhh, actually there's something else we want, do that then you get paid.
😬😬😬😬😬😬😬9 -
PM approves all UI and project gets assigned to me. He then makes tons of UI changes that will affect the workflow of the approved UI. To this point, code was clean and well documented. I request a few days to re arrange the code to reflect the new workflow. PM says: I need a minimal product. I don't need it clean. I want speed to ship and start marketing. That's where I stopped caring.. To the next dev, I am terribly sorry..2
-
!rant
Last night I had a minor hiccup with a iOS/Android CI service I absolutely love (BuddyBuild), so naturally I contact their support to address the issue and ask about potential new plans. A couple minutes later I find out I'm talking with the CEO! Turns out he's a really nice and receptive guy who cares a lot about their service!
How cool is that!? It was nice to tell him how much I've enjoyed their product and about the headache it's saved me!3 -
Before becoming a developer, I used to work as a sales rep at this company that spent a good amount of time building what they believed to be an innovative state-of-the-art “code generator”. It was basically a scaffolding tool for generating software.
They were using it to auto generate customized iOS and Android native mobile app templates, along with a web backed.
The problem was that the generated code was shit, and the developers on the team basically spent more time fixing bugs than if they had built everything from scratch. But their passion for the product meant they just kept using it.
For some reason they never fixed issues in the original templates, so basically all the bugs that were found, kept showing up with each new app!
I have never seen apps like this that essentially had more bugs than features. Opening more than 10 app screen meant the app would freeze and crash. Sign up forms were actually dummy forms. The list goes on...
All the apps had the same shitty UI. For example, Product pages had a product image area that was like 5% of the screen view!
Last but not least, apps had a backend IP address hardcoded pointing to a server with an IP address that was temporary. So one day they had to restart the server and suddenly all customer apps stopped working and required a software update to work!
It was amazing seeing how a team of 3 developers trying to fix messy autogenerated code, couldn’t accomplish what was essentially a website on an app that I managed to build in my free time.
That’s how I knew it was time to quit my job and code full time.2 -
With every new Apple product it seems that Jony Ive's job is reading the dictionary and finding less and less understandable words to be used in the next commercial to make the production process seem more and more complex although the result is the same device over and over again.
-
boss: *showing me the new platform*
me: "oh that looks like a good demo"
boss: "ah no that's the product! we're going to put this live"
me: "wh... there's no update nor delete function for anything! where is the user profile? where are the menus??"
boss: "that's ok, we'll take note when people start using it"
and now
boss: "we've concluded the product was bad and we're giving up on it" -
You know what really grinds my gears? When new employees start shouting out suggestions of what feature we should do.. and how stupid this/that thing now.. or how slow that page is.. or how there's a bug somewhere.
WHAT WOULD'VE WE DONE WITHOUT YOUR OPINION?! thank you so much!!!
+10 points if their job has nothing to do with product or development
SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP
please!!!15 -
Many people were hired to work on new product, but no one have told them that for one or two quarters they will have to maintain 20 years old project. I was ranting about this, but in the end accepted my fate, wiped tears with money and moved on. However one of devs took another path. When he was asked to work with .aspx and jquery 1.X instead of react, he just said : "Not going to happen" and left the building.5
-
Client has an "urgent" release that needs to be launched immediately... So they keep changing the spec every few minutes with new changes, but are upset that the product isn't launched yet. Lol. Got to love clients.1
-
Blabbering co-worker rant.
So this bonker who speaks non-stop for 15 minutes without even a breather break is more annoying than I thought.
1. She used to work for a project A and then they moved her to my project. She kept cribbing she wants to continue working on A because that's where her expertise are. So management hired a new team member so she can continue on A and new member can work with me.
Now next week, the new member is joining us. As we prepare the onboarding plan, bonker comes crying that she wants to work on my project and NOT on Project A. She is forcing us to give Project A to new team member.
Manager upfront rejected her proposal and told her that she'd be working on A.
2. She literally gives orders. Her tone is rude and blunt. The other day ordered me to review her presentation and kept following up even when I said I was busy. Same tone and attitude with manager.
Then she complained about my behaviour saying I was a bossy person even when I used the most polite tone (because I have actively worked on and built my social skills).
3. Knows shit about the product, has no skill set, asks the same question 10 times, and isn't able to deliver bare minimum.
And then evidently everyone follows up with me because I am on top of everything (because I have to as bonker can't function).
4. She lied to me that company gives good hikes and easy promotions.
She was kicked out of her previous project because of her incompetency.
Fortunately or unfortunately, my manager saved her ass. But she literally is the most stupid person I have worked with me in my entire career.
5. She has no communication skills, something that is highest valued skill in my profession. And when I do my normal, it pisses her off. She keeps complaining that I am overstepping.
If I don't then product will just fall apart and everyone might get fired because of no work.
And that is causing her insecurities and she starts fear mongering about both of us being fired.
I told our manager upfront that I want to lead the product and she was more than happy about the proposal. What sucks is that my manager is leaving this month end and I'll have to build trust with my new line manager.
Ugh!! She is annoying..8 -
Business Intelligence, the most confused market technology has to offer. (Perhaps rivaled only by machine licking. Learning, whatever)
Step 1: develop a product that can replace a company's database guys. Make it cost more than the database guys.
Step 2: Show off product to managers using images of the product that the managers will love, but never have the skills to do themselves.
Step 3: Fucking obviously the managers buy it.
Step 4: Fire half the database staff.
Step 5: Managers give the BI tools to their remaining database guys ANYWAYS and instruct them to use it
Step 6: Database guys spend a month learning the new tool because management "wants to use it too".
Step 7: Database guys now use this new system for reports but have trouble using it for complex use cases, as it was designed for simple use cases. Meanwhile, management will never, ever touch the tool again.
Step 8: Hire new guys for reporting, because the remaining database guys can't complete both their normal tasks *and* the reports.
Step 9: Database guys are expensive. Go to step 1.1 -
We are on a tight deadline and EVERY FUCKING TIME I see, my fucking boss is developing new features for the product... WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?1
-
The role of a Product Manager is just a decade or two old. Most organisations, including FAANG, are still figuring out what are the primary responsibilities of a PM.
A vast majority I know, including my dumbass, is struggling to keep things floating while in the role. Learning on the job is one of the only and most effective way to do so.
No wonder, imposter syndrome is so common in this group.
One of the main tasks is to make decisions. Important and impactful ones. The role came into existence to take the decision making load off our engineering friends while building any product.
This shit comes with huge responsibility.
BUT, not everyone understand this. In India, being a developer was a cool thing until 2018 and so everyone rushed into the role. Now somehow everyone started thinking being a Product Manager is cool because all you have to do is sit and shoot orders and things will happen magically.
I get reached out by so many folks every month asking for guidance and when I ask them what a PM does or why they want to be a PM, the narrative is more or less same.
Very few actually understand how taxing the role is or the challenges that we face while performing the job.
WHY THE FUCK ARE PEOPLE SO IGNORANT AND DUMB?
And in another news, my first week at new job was super amazing. Loved every bit of it. People are smart, processes are neat, things are structured, and lots and lots to learn for me.
How are you guys doing? Been a while that we spoke.
Official declaration: I am the dumbest person I know.10 -
So last week I ranted about the hours I was working, great start this week I'm up at 03:00 to go up north, not going to get back till 20:00 ish. Tomorrow I have to be in Wales for 09:00 so going to have to be up at 04:00 for a 5 hour travel time. Check my emails and my boss says after I get back from Wales tomorrow can we have a design and specification meeting about a "super urgent" product that we have to develop. Oh and Thursday I have to prep everything for going live with a new product Friday.8
-
I'm going on vacation next week, and all I need to do before then is finish up my three tickets. Two of them are done save a code review comment that amounts to combining two migrations -- 30 seconds of work. The other amounts to some research, then including some new images and passing it off to QA.
I finish the migrations, and run the fast migration script -- should take 10 minutes. I come back half an hour later, and it's sitting there, frozen. Whatever; I'll kill it and start it again. Failure: database doesn't exist. whatever, `mysql` `create database misery;` rerun. Frozen. FINE. I'll do the proper, longer script. Recreate the db, run the script.... STILL GODDAMN FREEZING.
WHATEVER.
Research time.
I switch branches, follow the code, and look for any reference to the images, asset directory, anything. There are none. I analyze the data we're sending to the third party (Apple); no references there either, yet they appear on-device. I scour the code for references for hours; none except for one ref in google-specific code. I grep every file in the entire codebase for any reference (another half hour) and find only that one ref. I give up. It works, somehow, and the how doesn't matter. I can just replace the images and all should be well. If it isn't, it will be super obvious during QA.
So... I'll just bug product for the new images, add them, and push. No need to run specs if all that's changed is some assets. I ask the lead product goon, and .... Slack shits the bed. The outage lasts for two hours and change.
Meanwhile, I'm still trying to run db migrations. shit keeps hanging.
Slack eventually comes back, and ... Mr. Product is long gone. fine, it's late, and I can't blame him for leaving for the night. I'll just do it tomorrow.
I make a drink. and another.
hard horchata is amazing. Sheelin white chocolate is amazing. Rum and Kahlua and milk is kind of amazing too. I'm on an alcoholic milk kick; sue me.
I randomly decide to switch branches and start the migration script again, because why not? I'm not doing anything else anyway. and while I'm at it, I randomly Slack again.
Hey, Product dude messaged me. He's totally confused as to what i want, and says "All I created was {exact thing i fucking asked for}". sfjaskfj. He asks for the current images so he can "noodle" on it and ofc realize that they're the same fucking things, and that all he needs to provide is the new "hero" banner. Just like I asked him for. whatever. I comply and send him the archive. he's offline for the night, and won't have the images "compiled" until tomorrow anyway. Back to drinking.
But before then, what about that migration I started? I check on it. it's fucking frozen. Because of course it fucking is.
I HAD FIFTEEN MINUTES OF FUCKING WORK TODAY, AND I WOULD BE DONE FOR NEARLY THREE FUCKING WEEKS.
UGH!6 -
New contract termination clause to be included in all future project contracts: "Contracting client agrees that uttering the phrase 'Your job is whatever I say it is,' or any semanticaly equivalent variant thereof is grounds for immediate contract termination. All work product and IP rights will transfer and assign to contracting client ONLY upon payment in full of contracted payment amount prorated to contract termination date."
-
What was your most disappointing moment as a software developer?
Mine was the realization that when you're working for someone, all they want to see is the final product. The people paying you don't give a shit whether you put your braces on a new line, your domain model doesn't call a database directly or if you're applying the best practices. Your teammates do, but the people paying you don't.
People hire you to get the job done, and that job is to solve a problem for someone. Not in the way that's best for you, but in the most effective way for them. Since I realized this, I lost some pride in my work.5 -
My current new boss is pretty awesome. When he arrived, we were a lot of juniors dev crumbling under pressure. He directly went to product team and to sales team and totally reduced our workload to something acceptable.
He values sane work environment a lot, and I think that's what make a good boss -
As some of you may remember about 5 months ago I bought a Lenovo laptop, it had some hardware faults so I got a new one and it had the same faults the store didn't want to offer me a new Lenovo laptop.
I was told to pick a laptop from a selection and today the store is trying to push the product away saying they can't do a thing.
Tonight I'm meeting with a lawyer because the fight has begun.8 -
Have you heard about Apple's new vacuum cleaner?
It's supposed to be the only Apple product that DOESN'T suck5 -
It is said that the number of programmers doubles every five years with fresh CS, CE, and EE grads. Assuming that's true, then at any one time over half the developer community are novices in the early stages of their career.
My entire life's been spent in software and I've been in it now for about 15 years and I've seen a lot of people make alot of things and I've seen a lot of people fail at alot of things. My observation is that the doers are the major thinkers, the people that really create the things that change this industry are both the thinker doer in one person. It's very easy to take credit for the thinking the doing is more concrete. It's very easy for somebody say "oh, I thought of this three years ago" but usually when you dig a little deeper you find that the people that really did it. Were also the people that really worked through the hard intellectual problems.
Many people falsely believe that a great idea constitutes 90% of the work. However, there is a significant amount of craftsmanship required to bridge the gap between a great idea and a great product. As you evolve that great idea it changes and grows it never comes out like it starts because you learn a lot more as you get into the subtleties of it and you also find there's tremendous amount of trade-offs that you have to make.
There are certain things you can't make electrons do, certain things you can't make plastic or glass, certain things you can't make factories or robots do. and as you get into all these things, Designing a product involves juggling 5,000 different concepts, fitting them together like puzzle pieces, and exploring new ways to combine them. Every day brings new challenges and opportunities to push the boundaries of what's possible, and it's this ongoing process that is the key to successful product development. That process is the "magic"4 -
I thought of posting this as a comment to @12bit float' post, but then decided it better goes out as a post by itself.
https://devrant.com/rants/5291843/...
My second employer, where I am on my last week of notice currently, is building a no code/low code tool.
Since this was my first job switch, I was in a dreamy phase and was super excited about this whole space. I indeed got to learn like crazy.
Upon joining, I realised that an ideal user persona for this product was a developer. Wow! No code tool for developer. sO cOoL...
We started building it and as obvious as it could get, the initial goal was adoption because we were still at top of the funnel.
We launched an alpha release shortly followed by a beta.
Nobody used it. Tech XLT/LT kept pushing product and design team to run a feature factory so that their teams can use this tool.
The culture set by those two leaders was toxic as fuck.
Now, I decided to do some research and some more product discovery to understand why folks were not using it. Mind you, we were not allowed to do any research and were forced to build based on opinions of those two monkeys.
Turns out that the devs were really happy with their existing tools and our tool was another tool being forcefully added into their toolbox by the said XLT/LT.
Not only that, even if they decide to use our tool, out of pressure, they still cannot because the product was missing key capabilities like audit control and promotion from one environment to another.
Building those would essentially mean reinventing Github aka version control and Spinnaker aka CI/CD pipeline.
My new boss (I got 3 managers in 4 months because of high attrition across levels due to the toxic culture), thinks that tech XLT/LT are doing great and we all suck as a product and design team.
He started driving things his own way without even understanding or settling down for first 90 days.
Lol, I put in my resignation got out of that mess.
So agreeing to what our boy said here, no code tools are a complete waste, especially for a developer, and even as a non tech person, I prefer keyboard over mouse.2 -
Just had an interview with our new potential product manager. I companioned our CEO, if technical questions arise...
First, he came to our office, to the interview, and never..never looked at our application. Neither he saw some screenshots, review's or anything related to the product. As a potential product manager...gasp
And he really tried to impress me, by mentioning what a great full stack developer he also is (LOL), with years of experience in frontend and backend.
But, since I am an android software developer, he mentioned he don't like java. But he loves java script...
Me: ehhh what? So you compare apples to oranges. Why do you don't like java? (And I could image a lot things ...)
Him: because unlike JavaScript, java is a mess when writing code.
Me: ok Iam done.9 -
!rant
How I think the process for designing a hardware-driver is like
CEO: "Alright everyone, we have designed and created this great product, now let's write a driver for it!"
PM: "Great then! We just code for Windows, create an eye-catching UI but leave the actual at the worst possible case that could work!"
Dev: "B-But isn't there other OSes, like Linux and Android that people use on their computers too?"
PM: "Shut up! We are going to JUST support Windows and f*** no absolutely other OSes!
Dev: "But what if they are also developers, and want to control and use this great product by programming it themselves? We should make the driver open-source, or at least give them some APIs!"
PM: "Nonsense! They are only going to use this product on M$ Windows, and with the program we provide to them, even if it's crappy and crashes most of the time!"
Dev: "But-but..."
PM: "No buts! That's our final decision!"
And some other consumer devs are like, "F*** it, we just reverse-engineer the codes and write a new driver ourselves!"
:|3 -
I have a sandbox account for a product we are developing and I'm receiving promotional emails.
I could just opt out, but I think it's adorable how they try to surprise me with the new features I created -
!rant
Just deleted 6 files and simplified a process significantly, omg it feels so good to throw stuff out
My product owner was once under the impression that writing more code was something I enjoyed doing, but it couldn't be farther from the truth.
Writing new solutions and patterns is fun, adding anything other than that is just more future maintenance work1 -
1 - Spend 6 months building an app with Flutter
2 - Try to add in-app purchase. Must upload an apk to google console and register a product
3 - Must launch the app so the product is activated
4 - Console complains apk must contain 64 bits version
5 - Go to the issues tab on github and find a solution
6 - Implement the solution, recompile and send 2 apk files to Console
7 - Did not work...
8 - Find out maybe the console will allow just on closed alpha and beyond
9 - Put apks on closed alpha and fail because the Console wants a new apks with increased version codes...
10 - Recompile and send apks
11 - Console won't allow launching unless the format is using the new App Bundle
12 - Flutter does not support App Bundle with 32 and 64 bits...
13 - See issue about it saying the possible fix is in beta version, just need to update... What could go wrong?
I just wanted to release a damn app
I hate that shit5 -
Guys seriously why would you buy a macbook if apple will support it for like 7 years then you won't be able to upgrade to newer OSX versions? whereas a good laptop machine could run Linux for a lifetime, you could even change distros if you got bored.
Let me dive into it, If I buy a brand new macbook and use it rarely, its condition will barely change however one day I will get the message you need a greater version to install X app, seriously apple?
Real life scenario: I have an ipod touch 5 i rarely use it, one day i decided to install an application and boom no you can't buddy you need to upgrade the iOS however the currently version of iOS is the latest version i could get for that ipod touch model, so the thing is, I have a perfect condition product that is unusable unless for some music playing and what i already installed as apps, does it look fair to you? I have the same issue with an ipad mini, its condition is perfect, battery life is decent, I can't receive anymore updates, the youtube app stopped working, im stuck again with a product that i can use only to read some ebooks or use youtube through the browser, apple wants me to buy a new ipad which is absurd.
I will never buy an apple product again
Fuck you Apple46 -
Me: we need to fix all these technical debt and prevent new ones from growing
Boss: this needs to be prioritized by product owner
Correct me if I'm wrong but a PO didn't see all the shit under the hood, (of a nice looking "car")... And by the time the engine starts choking... It's already too late?1 -
Was part of a meeting where the TL was discussing ideas for a product based on a new technology, I had read and played a bit with it myself so added a few cents, here is what unfolded:
TL: Great that u know abt this why don't you build a poc.
Me: It's simple to get this poc working, but how will we monetize this?
TL: You don't worry abt that, build a poc.
Me the next day: Here is the poc you asked for.
TL: Great so this can work let's release a basic version soon, so any ideas on how we will monetize this?1 -
New office saga continues... SE1E05
I transitioned from a B2B to B2C role. Now the company and the product is entirely consumer facing.
Many or rather all are actively engineering the product to be more and more dystopian in nature.
Using concepts like FoMo, social validations, and other techniques to get users to spend more into consumerism in the name of building better experience.
It's the darkest shit I have seen so far. And this company is ethically a great one. I can only imagine how pathetic Meta and others would be.
I hate ny role. I hate how I have to do this for a living. Knowingly or unknowingly, I got myself here and absolutely hate where we are headed as a human race.
I don't like it anymore and I am only doing it as a job. No longer proud or excited of my job profile.
Fuck the impact, technology will be a catalyst for human extinction.
And with that, I found a good solution to my Mac 😏
Do check: https://reddit.com/r/Unexpected/...7 -
Just now... Got a job to create patch files for a couple of jars, which may or may not have varying class files. In total, I have to decompile, check, add and synchronize about 30 class files in 6 jars with a new functionality (that I didn't write). 🙂
FUCK PRODUCTION! WHY CANT YOU MAINTAIN ONE MOTHERFUCKING JAR?
OH? YOU'RE SUPERSTITIOUS THAT ONE TINY, ANT-SHIT SIZED CHANGE IN ONE SIMPLE FUNCTIONALITY WILL FUCK UP *OUR* PRODUCT?
FUCK MANAGEMENT! YOU DON'T HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOUR *OWN* PRODUCT!
OH? CUSTOMER COMES FIRST? HAVE THE BALLS TO DEFEND YOUR OWN FUCKING SELF AND PRODUCT TO THE CLIENT OR THEY'RE GONNA MAKE YOU YOUR BITCH AND TIE A GAGBALL DIPPED IN HOT SAUCE AROUND YOUR MOUTH! HOW.. THE FUCK.. DID YOU MISS THAT LOGIC??????
Best part, they want it by tomorrow, and they don't wanna test it. Guess who's gonna get slaughtered after a week? ME! 🙂5 -
Our employee management system, for some reason, stored Testlists (I work in QA) linked to the user accounts that created them. Now after an colleague who worked there for five years left pretty much all our data was suddenly down the drain and nobody backed the fricking server up because, hey, whats the fun in that. Now all the tests need to be rewritten and other than the whole gui test automation of our product, maintenance of the same for another product, manually testing dev issues and training my new code monkeys to frickin not commit non working code to the trunk I have now also "Make a better Employee management system" (roughly translated those are the specs I've got) on my plate... I can remember back to the care free days of just before my boss asked me if I wanted to try to automate some of the test cases... How did I ever survive this paralyzing tranquility. Ha, surprise.
!rant, I fucking love the stress and juggling a shit ton of problems at the same time keeps ine on edge.2 -
Haven't ranted in a while so here it goes.
Head of product took me (senior dev) to a high value client workshop/demo session and over the course of two days found the reason behind why the dev team has been pushed to the limit as of late and sales/product team has been making promises to clients without checking with dev leaders on reasonable delivery dates on massive new features.
I tried my best to manage expectations by differing talking about delivery dates by saying "lets discuss that with the team" rather than giving out dates right now. But as soon as the meeting ends he sends an email to the client confirming delivery dates on features that we have done no research on or even specialize in!
Please tell me this is not how well established businesses work or is that the new reality of things. In either case I wanna find a new job :/2 -
Hot Take:
Subscription based products are exactly why we don't see major break-throughs in software anymore.
*** I am warning you, don't mention AI in the comments, I am gonna fucking lose it. ***
Tell me one thing, If you spent thousands to create a product that you now have a good subscriber base on, why would you invest money into making another? Why wouldn't you just consider improving the product at hand and selling it to more people to create additional profit?
In the 90s we used to get any software on CDs/DVDs and you actually got to own it. Meaning that the company can only take money from you ONCE and never again (almost). This also meant that the companies knew that soon they'd have to come up with something else that will make them money, thus them creating new software every couple or so years, some even creating ground-breaking software.
But then, there is thing called MONOPOLY.
We will never get another music app than Spotify or Apple music, because they are just too far ahead. They're built on subscription model.
You can probably think of more examples of great companies building great products and moving them to subscription model and therefore never creating another software, because frankly, why take the risk to lose money when you can gain more money by improving the product at hand?
We will never get the same frequency of good games coming to market from established companies like RockStar. Why should they bothered to make GTA 6 when they can sell millions of worth of Shark Cards every month and rake in the profits?
Subscriptions have totally killed off software creativity and motivation for devs/companies to create great software.17 -
Smartphone manufacturers these days, imagine how meetings to come up with ideas for new products go about.
Product manager :ok people,what can we do to make our next smartphone 'different'.
Employee 1: let's add more cameras
Employee 2:Let's kill the notch
Employee 3:Let's include the buzzword AI in all of our marketing
Employee 4:Let's put 8Gb of Ram in our phone
Employee 5:Let's just do all of those things and also give it a screen with a ridiculous aspect ratio and unnecessarily high resolution.3 -
The scrum master for the project I'm working on decided to help out with changing some code (I'll add he's got a master's in software engineering and very proud about it..aka..big ego). It took him two days...yes two days to write the attached code.
I reviewed his code and sent back a response (code took about 15 seconds to write) including the link to the logging documentation explaining what fields were and were not necessary. Not sure how will look in devrant ...
var data = new InformationalDataPoint
{
Properties =
{
["RMANumber"] = rma,
["InvoiceID"] = invoiceId
}
};
Logger.Log(data);
He's stopped talking to me. Our next scrum meeting with the product owner should be ...um...awkward.
-
Since my first post was a success, here's another shameless hack-- in this case, ripping a "closed" database I don't usually have access to and making a copy in MySQL for productivity purposes. That was at a former job as an IT guy at a hardware store, think Lowes/Rona.
We had an old SCO Unix server hosting Informix SQL (curious, anyone here touched iSQL?), which has terminal only forms for the users to handle data, and has keybindings that are strangely vi based (ESC does commit changes. Mindfsck for the users!). To add new price changes to our products, this results to a lengthy procedure inside a terminal form (with ascii borders!) with a few required fields, which makes this rather long. Sadly, only I and a colleague had access to price changes.
Introducing a manager who asks a price change for a brand- not a single product, but the whole product line of a brand we sell. Oh and, those price changes ends later after the weekend (twice the work, back at regular price!)
The usual process is that they send me a price change request Excel document with all the item codes along with the new prices. However, being non technical, those managers write EVERYTHING at hand, cell by cell (code, product name, cost, new price, etc), sometimes just copy pasted from a terminal window
So when the manager asked me to change all those prices, I thought "That's the last time I manually enter all of this sh!t- and so does he". Since I already have a MySQL copy of the items & actual (live) price tables, I wrote a PHP backend to provide a basic API to be consumed to a now VBA enhanced Excel sheet.
This VBA Excel sheet had additional options like calculating a new price based on user provided choices ("Lower price by x $ or x %, but stay above cost by x $ or x %"), so the user could simply write back to back every item codes and the VBA Excel sheet will fetch & display automatically all relevant infos, and calculate a new price if it's a 20% price cut for example.
So when the managers started using that VBA sheet, I had also hidden a button which simply generate all SQL inserts for the prices written in the form, including a "back to regular price" if the user specified an end date, etc.
No more manual form entry for me, no more keyboard pecking for the managers with new prices calculated for them. It was a win/win :)1 -
I've been a Macbook user for over a decade, after the initial disappointment of the 2016 MacBook Pro release I decided to move to a PC, against my better judgement I decided to buy a new Dell XPS 15, after reading all the reviews praising it's build quality and performance + it seems to have good hardware for Linux compatibility.
Soo much regret, I couldn't be more disappointed, it's such a piece of shit, I admit I probably got a bad egg, but dealing with Dell support is like pulling hairs from my testicle sack. If I have to pay an extra $500-$1000 on my next laptop for an "Apple Tax" to get a product that has been through proper quality control and has awsome customer service so be it, last time I try something new.
BTW I'm not a PC hater, I just wish more companies made high quality products.10 -
How many of you have started a job and ended up doing something totally different, and how did deal with it?
I was hired to be an SQL Developer, writing reports, views, stored procedures etc, but knew I would be asked to do some work on some internal c# apps.
Roll on almost 2 years and I'm pretty much a DBA in all but name, and the C# app I was supposed to be doing a little work on is now mine, so as well as being the sole programmer, I'm also the product owner, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd line support.
All of this and I've not even had a change in title, let alone a pay rise that reflect the new roles and responsibilities I've taken on.9 -
Point out that removing a "include charger" option from the new iPhone package is not appealing to users with conservative spending habits (me) and users who plan to transition from android to IOS.
"AhaHah you must be poor, poor ppl can't afford to consoom new products every year, I don't care about no chargers AhaAha"
"It'S JuST $30 jUst Buy One @ the StOre"
This is why apple users get a bad rep, apparently not tossing a perfectly functioning phone into a landfill every year makes you poor. My phone doesn't use the new chargers because I actually made a good purchase that has lasted for around 4 years and the only other apple product I own is a macbook, people like these (ain't a few), make me ashamed to be an "apple user" whatever the fuck that means.12 -
Most intense day for me was at the very start of my career. Internship... went with product manager to client's office while PM installed new test version of our product for on-site integration testing. Shortly after deploy, client manager came over to ask why production had gone down...
Turns out that manually typing DB name as part of deployment script is not, erm, risk free. PM entered production DB name and took out a very busy call centre for a few hours. Agents in tears, customers raging on phones, etc! After we restored and got everything back up and running, he reached me the keyboard and said "You're doing it this time."
My attempt was problem free, thankfully. Earned many brownie points that day.1 -
I'm fucking tired of putting my efforts into bug fixes.
5 years of web. I never had a client that likes to keep it's crappy slow piece of shit product on the market in the exact same way it is.
If they didn't sell it to state employees (and good luck for them if they do not use it) their product would be dead.
That's the only way they get money: bids. And the minimum a state pays is 15 MILLION.
And they don't have 90K to pay another dev to help creating a new product.
Their CEO fucking REJECTS anything that's not a bug fix. Once he said to our PM:
"It's pretty and more fast, but wasn't this way that made me rich"
I'm thinking I'm getting another client, seriously. Everyday the same thing breaks and they already know the fucking answer:
WE NEED TO FUCKING REFACT
CREATE A NEW FUCKING PROJECT
This shit is making crazy. I can't sleep. I can't eat and I'm always fucking tired, no matter what I do.
I need to stop working for Brazilians.
I'll try US, Canada or somewhere in Europe.8 -
Working hard to meet crazy deadline to finish last update before new product announcement to make it look better. Our CEO blabs about new top secret product at some conference throwing away all marketing efforts up to date and putting marketing team into panic mode. Result? They moved the announcement date without discussing it with development. Result? Our efforts and overtimes wasted and we are announcing product before it is ready. End result? I'm pissed so I wrote angry e-mail to our CEO. Wondering what will happen now :-) But with unfinished announced product and crazy deadlines they need me a lot more than I need them.
-
Asked to research angular 2 and do a POC on my own time, get assigned to a legacy product last updated in 2011, to watch all the new hires get put on the new tech.1
-
Oh great...
I am slowly beginning to realize that my boss/manager doesn't care about refactoring at all. He cares about features and resolved tickets and thats why the code is a pile of spaghetti filled with hacks to fit every clients desires.
Also all of my coworkers work for themselves, ticket by ticket, either because they just don't care or because they are so frustrated that they don't care anymore. And here I am, an intern, and they expect me to cope with this deformed clutter of legacy designs, buried under hacks and workarounds, while implementing some new feature which in the end I have to put on top of everything else because nothing of that codebase can be reused. Fucking shit, fucking irresponsible managers who dont think about the quality of their product. -
Four and half months,
Hundreds of hundreds PRs and one additional product cluster
By 6 Engineers..
To 500+ micro services
Which has no timezone or currency context,
Created by 250+ engineers,
To launch in a new country...
It didn't make me happy.
But the feedback from customers and drivers is priceless and #heartwhelming14 -
This is how Scrum works:
Three coworkers are in a Scrum Team. One of them is also the Product Owner and the Scrum Master... The PO decided this Monday that they need to add a new feature for the Tuesday night release, which is estimated at 80 hours. I told the other two in front of a manager that this is not scrum. Nobody gives a shit.2 -
Going through the conversation for xxxxth time with my business partner, why we will not launch a new product on top of pre-made PHP script / plugin.
Just got our company into TDD, and automated QA via CI server & code checks etc, PLEASE stop trying to drag us back into the land of spaghetti code & bug legions in production. That's all thxbye. -
The best?
I managed to release the new version of the best selling main product of my company.
The worst?
At the release it had critical bugs I didn’t find during the tests. -
I have been trying my best to fix a broken process and a product that never saw the day of the light.
Aligning all the teams, trying to bridge all the feature gaps, and at the same time learning this new product and company culture.
Now this lady comes to me with a requirement. I have zero clue what it is and instead of empathising with me that I am new and should dumb down her ask, she kept throwing heavy product specific terms as if I have been working in this team for previous 9 lives.
Anyway, I take her ask into my product roadmap and try to prioritise it.
Now I connect with them again for some discovery and she is passive aggressive towards me that it's been more than a year no one is considering their request and started whinning.
I have just joined the org 6 months ago and you start attacking me for someone else's mistake?
What the actual fuck! Go fucking die bitch. Never again I am taking her request.
If she has a problem then just speak it up and take it with leadership. Don't fucking be passive aggressive with me especially when I am not at fault and infact I am trying to help her.
And in interviews they ask people whether they are a team player or not. -
When somebody demos a new app to the CIO as a functional product but turns out to be a concept prototype made with Origami without any proper code... literally a glorified PowerPoint with animations....3
-
when your headphones get a new terms&service with an alexa assistant update and it becomes clear what the purpose of this product has become.
SONY W1100XHe Adphones.
so it plays audio ads now? 😆
1 -
HP makes shit devices. How the fuck you gonna regress with product design from 7 years ago?
Like whos the fucktard that thinks “how about in order to swap a keyboard, we make the user take EVERYTHING out and then put it into a new upper housing?”
Or my favorite is “instead of screwing a screen panel in, lets use some painfully difficult to access stretch tape?”
Fuck HP’s product design team. If by some off chance any of yall know anyone who’s part of that team, tell them i said they can eat a fat dick and get aids.6 -
when you start a new job where they just switched to a new CMS product that is no longer being developed... then find out they spend tons of money on a vendor to set it up for them.
At least it's supported for the near future. Last job was using FoxPro and AS400 mainframe
2 -
I just watched https://youtube.com/watch/... - towards the (very) end he's talking about how software developers rule the world... and I just realized something.
A while back, I was working on an accounting sub system for a SaaS product. We managed some of the revenue of our customers and had the accounting for that part as well. Revenue + Payments (with all the VAT / sales tax / ... that you need to have). BUT no expenses.
One day, the head accountant of a customer, angrily demanded that we immediately implement a new payment method, called commission.
You don't need to be an accounting expert for knowing, that a commission is an expense you have because somebody else marketed / sold your product / service for you. Making it a payment method is probably wrong. With a bit more knowledge you'd know that the taxes which are around expenses are completely different to revenue or payments. (btw payments didn't even have any taxes in those countries that we covered at that time at least).
So there I was standing, a software developer, trying to explain the product manager and the head accountant of our customer, that the idea is beyond stupid, and the fact that it comes from an accountant is super scary to me. (he was usually extremely picky about everything we did.)
Luckily, it was easy to convince the manager. He tried to explain it to the accountant but that person just didn't get it.
as if designing resilient distributed systems, which have 99,99% up time weren't hard enough, we also need to be experts in every domain that we have to deal with? And if there is a tiny bug and one out of 10s of thousands of transactions is screwed up, people start panicking and "loose trust in the product"? - what the hell is wrong with them?
Luckily it's a minority of customers only, but each of them is such a pain. Do you also have customers like that? who should know better, but somehow you are the expert in their domain?2 -
When Everybody Is Digging for Gold, It’s Good To Be in the Pick and Shovel Business
- ai is just another squeeze of money to cloud from our pockets, no matter what you do as long as you’re not selling/renting hardware or have high profit customers your product will die
I don’t believe in any ai product right now that can’t be self hosted and opensource and many of them are not.
I use mac, like 64GB m1 mac book pro so I can host load of things like llama, wizzard-lm, mistral, any yolo, whisper, gpt, fucking midjourney or other stable diffusion for me is no drama.
I’d say there is no consumer product for ai right now. OpenAI is scam given what we got from mistral.
We are very early in this new but old technology and my worries are that we are not there yet. We will need to wait for another iteration that is approximately 10 years to achieve what we have in mind because current hardware is 10 years behind software.
We don’t have an affordable computing power to go for our dreams.
Sad but true.5 -
Got blames for 2 hours because our product went down.
Because the provider of license managment went down.
Well, now I put in place a "fuck you" work around. If licensing provider is down, people can still connect and use product (But not create new accounts).
So silly. -
WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS LEAVE CLOSE TO DEADLINES???
My team exists of three developers and a product owner. By the end of the month we have to deliver two new applications. It has not been going as smoothly as we'd hoped so far. However, one of the developers has cut his time for this project from fulltime to 1-2 days a week starting this week. The other developer is also needed on another project and has to run to the rescue whenever there is a problem with the servers, so he doesn't really solve any bugs either. Also he'll be leaving straight after deadline so he has to document everything only he knows and he'll be on holiday next week. Also, the product owner leaves tomorrow and will be back after deadline.
So.. Here I am, junior developer, have been here for about three months and I have to fix everything and do the communication to our testers as well. I'm feeling too overwhelmed right now...5 -
Got a new job at a fairly large IT firm which deals with large scale business software for customers like the government's various agencies.
The very first job I'm assigned to: we have to strip down this software and make it more general, go ahead and delete everything related to <feature>.
I haven't had time to get to know the product and I've deleted hundreds of files and lines of code from related files...
I have a feeling this will bite me somehow5 -
most productive workflow I ever seen.
excel 1 : stock
excel 2 : order
compare stock with order manually 1000+ product.
excel 3 : check history of order generator (shop)
excel 4 : today's price of product + tax
excel 5 : alot specific unit's of product
excel 6 : maintained bill credit/debit
next step : forword to managers for approval
excel 7 : edit's from nanager
process repeat till managers approval
excel 8 : dispatched history
excel 9 : return product (reason's/unit)
excel 10 : stock update return + new product's
and few more excel's
data of 5+ year's
daily 500+ order's
lPO listed company
i have not mentioned account and other stuff
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
A coworker created several WinForms-Tools because it was "more comfy" than learning XAML which we usually use for all our sw clients.
Now that these tools are relevant for our infrastructure and some even for the product itself they have to be maintained by others as well.
Note: he tried to use OOP but the result is more like a complete new style of programing . Processes, objects and external scripts in the mix.
Mainreason why noone could know about it: the product manager used him as kind of private dev for some hours a week. No reviews, barely documentation... Now we decided that developing the tools from the scratch is more time and cost efficient.
What a mess... -
I'd like to talk about my first impression of the new product of Microsoft :
"New Edge Browser"
I just wanted to take a shallow glance at this browser, and it was horribly awesome in contrary with my expectations.
The design and animations and smooth transitions, ease of migration from chrome and enhanced UI were the things that aroused my interest at the first 5 minutes of usage, as a frontend developer, I'm so much eager to dig up more in it. Share your experience and opinions with me 😉
22 -
So this happened when I was interning. We were developing an online application for hospitals. Now as it is with any new product. We had a lot of small issues popping up related changing of text or design colors. Now this piss kissing product manage of ours who has had no prior experience of a product of the scale we were developing started posting issues in the company’s internal whatsapp group. It was fine initially when the issues were less and small. However, when the amount and intensity grew, I suggested that he be given access as a issue poster on the git repo of the code.
Now I couldn’t comprehend his level of douchiness before hand but this guy started posting issued there but only a link to a google doc with the issue described there.
Then when came the time to change the status of these issues, I asked him to verify for his satisfaction that the issue is resolved and mark it as such. So Mr. Shitmenot started to maintain a fucking google sheet to maintain the status of issues and asked us to do the same. And upon demarcation he would manually change the color of the cells representing the issue. Like what the fuck dude.
I complained about this to my mentor who also happened to be he CEO but he couldn’t care less as if it was some debt that he owed the guy.
Safe to say I left the company shortly after things started to get out of hand and more shit began to happen. Yes there was more stuff that happened!!! -
Product manager: When building new features, we find we have bugs that reappear in other parts of the app where the bug was solved before. We have to find a solution to this issue.
Dev: These are called regressions, they happen all the time in software development.
Product manager: ...
Dev: Fuck outta here! Its friday!3 -
A: Please build a Website for our new product.
A: Please use fancy technology, Animations and stuff!
B: OK, but $_things won't Work on mobile
A: mobile is Not our target audience. No Problem, optimize it for big Screens only.
B: it's 2017 - we need a mobile optimized Page, are u sure?
A: yes, so what i say
A week later...
B: hey a, here is Your preview. Optimized for big Screens, and i didn't Care much about mobile.
A: HEY B, YOU NEED TO FIX $FUNCTIONS ASAP!! THEY DON'T WORK ON MOBILE -
Around three months ago in a meeting regarding a new end2end test for a product :
PO: We have a full feature stop, only bug fixes are coming until we can unify all products.
Me : So I can use any selectors without worrying the whole thing breaks with the next update?
PO: Sure.
Last Thursday :
PO: Yeah, we gonna overhaul the entire UI with the next release to get better UX.
Why would any sane person reinvent an entire product thats already scheduled for discontinuation in 2018? And how is it possible that a few months ago nobody knew anything about it? Are they using fucking tatot cards for management decisions?1 -
”We’re not going to shuffle you (devs) around from project to project and definitely not taking on any new time-sensitive projects with the limited resources we have, seriously understaffed as we are atm” - that was the promise.
So today I got assigned to a time-sensitive project (unconditional deadline by the end of the year) on a product I am not at all familiar with... I almost believed 2 projects underway was enough so that it would not get assigned to me. Oh well, there’s always room for a 3rd.
At least I get to pick my tools so I get to try out Fable... a silver lining there, and not really a thin one.3 -
My boss has told me he now doesn’t think we can afford the new property management system we desperately need to do most of the projects this year.
He has now suggested that I build a new one for the company to use from scratch. Oh and in the same timeline as buying an off the shelf product.
😒 -
To make my new desktop "sweat"
NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1080 8 GB Intel i7-8700 (3.20 GHz) 6-Core 16 GB DDR4 240 GB SSD 1 TB HDD
https://newegg.com/Product/...
https://devrant.com/rants/1890595/...13 -
Job BS that made me consider quitting?
Huh. so timely.
With my previous employer, it was the whole "we're doing Agile and sprints and all the things" with "finish the project in six weeks plus here are some more requirements" garbage. Plus my tech lead always let the business roll over her and add unplanned requirements during a sprint without adjusting the deadlines set by the project managers. In summary: a fuck-all combination of Waterfall deadlines, Kanban tickets and Scrum timeboxes.
At my current employer, it's our business partners who're a bunch of douchebags that don't plan for anything except making sure their bonuses stay intact. Recently they terminated support for a third-party product that literally drives 99% of their web application then says to us "Hey, we need to build our own replacement for the vendor product using an entirely new stack. You have 3 months or our clients will get pissed." Oh, and these business partners keep raising new issues without any documentary basis except "this doesn't feel right" when they test our in-progress work. So helpful <sarcasm />
On the bright side, I'm getting paid whether or not this project fails, so... meh. -
How to fix issues the easy way:
1. Provide users a way to raise issues
2. Immediately respond to new issues saying you added them to the internal ticketing system
3. Wait till the affected product reaches EoL
4. Tell the customer you are sorry, but as the product is now after EoL, you cannot use any resources on fixing the issue
5. Close the issue -
*sees a new tech/framework/language*
*dives straights to download just checking for windows/mac/linux*
*downloaded product doesn't start/gives error/complains because some prerequisites are not met*
*after some frustration it starts to work*
*To not offend the Gods, writes "Hello World"*
*Carry a "Hackerman" face all day*
*Updates resume* -
I've been interviewing at a local company. They want that I (as the new FE dev) do monthly presentations to the whole company (50-ish) about the progress of our product.
This is the first time I heard this. I assume this is a red flag :(
Otherwise, the company looked good (except a company phone that would have been an iPhone)11 -
Life as a Software Engineering intern so far,
Travel 10 miles everyday from home to workplace.
Week 1: Understand the existing stack and start working on Django + Angular JS.
Task : Add something to existing documentation.
Week 2:
Task : Start working on existing product and improve request and response time for a particular module.
Week 3: Shift to new stack. Learn new stuff and start again.
Mandatory work policy for 9.5 hrs. FML -
To the managers and new developers.
Development, and Product Development is not a black-and-white game.
It is an entire spectrum. You cannot move to the next best version. Next best feature, or the next best app.
The only jump that you take is getting started. After that it is a walk across the entire spectrum. Things grow slowly, and steadily. Just keep an eye on the next improvement.
Study the analytics, improvise, focus your energies, and just move to the next shade.
Enough steps, and you will have what you want.
It requires planning, courage, determination, tactics, sticking together ,and above all patience.
Most importantly, get rid of the people who cannot think long, rush, and mess things up.1 -
I was not happy with the way my team lead made those technical decisions. I couldn't do much about it. Hit with frustration, I switched job.
What a coincidence, my new employer is exactly his old employer. Although I liked the company with my impression from the interview, knowing this fact made me nervous. What if this is the place that bred him into what he is today?...
Turned out the reality is not cruel. I'm joining a team that is formed way after he left. And this new team is expected to bring changes to the old-fashioned existing product (or simply a revamp/remake if you call it).
And it's interesting for me to now come to understand the poor decisions he has made. I said I "understand". This does not mean I agree with him now. His approach makes sense when I look at the old-fashion product I am working on. But it still feels wrong in many ways for the product he is now in charge of.
There, I witness that someone with experience is not necessarily smart.
This is the same guy who said "That's why I don't like to catch exception."
FYI https://devrant.com/rants/2420797/...1 -
I used to love my job, the guy that looked forward to mondays, there was always something new to learn, I was passionate about clean code and learning new languages like Elixir. As a software engineer I thought my occupation had a special significance in this world, I saw possibility and potential of creating something so impactful on the world that it would become my legacy.
Now after 5 years I’m realising that none of this stuff really matters to the world, software engineers aren’t special and it’s evident from our salaries how valuable we are compared to other professions in sales, medicine or law. My friend who works as in customer success management makes more than me.
While some of us will be in the lucky few whose work will change the world, most of us will just be another cog in the wheel, all that matters is how many product/features you ship out, nobody gives a shit about code quality, concurrency and architecture design other than us5 -
What retarded way of writing a json feed is this? what the fuck!
Each product in the feed is translatable, but instead of creating a new object in the feed with the translated content, there's an additional field pointing to a language code (this applies to all translateable fields).
Then each translatable field is appended the number which matches the number appended to the language field containing the desired language code.
In addition to that, the keys doesn't have any sensible meaning, but appearently they abide by som obscure "GS1 / GDSN" standard.
So for each "distinct" field I have to look up the definition of that key
If just the language code and the actual value keys was grouped together.. but no, the feed is ordered by the number after the 'D'.
Yeah for being stuck with something that looks like infinite scrolling, because one product object is fucking gigantic.
FUCKING INSANE MANIAC PIECE OF TRASH.
@#%!#€&
7 -
Crazy deadlines> Director: "You need to design a new architecture that has failover, multi-AZ, automated deployments, CI/CD pipeline, automated builds/tests as well, for our new SaaS product. You have 3 days to complete it"
Me: "Ok cool. Do we have the new product developed? Can I have the spec docs of the new software, libs and packages required for the env?"
Product Lead: "No we dont have anything yet. The POC is on my local PC, but I dont know what packages are needed to run it"
Me: "So I cant design anything unless I have the minimum requirements to run the new software"
Director: "Just get it up and running in a live environment and we'll take it from there"
Me: *sigh*..this is going to be a big mistake -
So, a few friends of mine are starting a company. They'll be the CEO, CTO etc. The product is an app, with its corresponding back end in the cloud. They want me to build the app.
1. I'm not willing to take risk - spending time on that (not my idea at the first place & may or may not go well)
2. Not sure if I'll be benefitted. (Monetary / stake)
3. I have few projects at hand & have plans to learn something more/new (not narrow down only to apps).
What should I do guys?? Recommendations??11 -
So, I'm the engineering leader of a startup. This year, the company hired new directors and with that a new CPO. We've been using Google Workspace and have all our infrastructure on GCP. We never had any trouble with Google products. We also have Google SSO configured in almost every tool out there.
Yesterday, the new CPO, sent me a request to change "just some dns" on the domain. Those "just some dns" were Microsoft 365 mx, cname and text records.
I asked him if he was planning to switch to MS.
He answered: "yes! The team (a new team of marketing) wants to use PowerPoint and Teams".
I don't know you guys, but I hate MS products. They're just bad.
So, yes, it seems that now I'm gonna waste my time switching and configuring everything with MS just because they don't know other tools that are way better than any MS product!
I tried to convince him, this wasn't a good move, but it seems my opinion equals zero at this company.
I just hate this type of product managers that always wants to reinvent the wheel to let others see that they are doing something important when they're not.
Also hate when managers make decisions without ever consulting the people that will be affected by those decisions... But I guess that's how it works in this world...10 -
Craziest deadline: job processing system for a manufacturing company, Android app, live updating web interface, integration with 3 existing systems, custom/new database and workflow... 9 days from concept to prototype. I was the only dev on it.
Yes, the product sucked, and no, I didn't really sleep. -
New product owner colleague has a question like every hour, walks right over without considering that I am coding or if my headset is on for obviou reasons.
The questions are not even programming related and more to do with him updating story acceptance criterias for like the next freaking 5 sprints. These are stuff that could take hours to explain what the planned features are to begin with let alone discussing individual stories. I've actually taken my time and spent hrs explaining this shit to him now. Won't take any notes, jus shakes his head and says he understands and comes back asking same question again and again. Best part, he never gets to the point. Instead of asking 'hey for xyz feature do we need that component' he goes on to tell me he talked to this person and that person and he found this out and that out bla bla(like I give a fk..) and then somewhat formulates the question which I swear takes like 10 mins.
Lost count on hw many times he has interrupted me now when I am deep into some debug cos he needed to tell me about how his day went for some reason.
It's one thing to train a new developer but a product owner.. For fk sake. Trying to not be offensive but damn he is pushing it.10 -
I finally get the go ahead to push an update to a client site into production. Client then sends out marketing email about changes later that afternoon. The next day the client decides they are not ready to start fulfilling orders from one of the new products I added. Now I have to rush a change to remove the product links from the site.2
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Started a new job at a big firm (previously came from a startup). Both do "scrum". Still have my mind blown because at the new job, we have people join the standup of which NOBODY in the team knows what their role is on the product...
Does this happen often in big corporates?5 -
New person joins client's team to handle one product on the website and asks me to restructure the whole site. Sorry, pal, but unless you have money to add to the project's already spoken-for pot of resources for features, you're gonna have to wait til next year.
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Second week sick I see how my life slowed down and how meaningless everything around is, everyone is rushing about some bullshit, name it new amazing job opportunity, black Friday great deal, super duper product idea or some most important bug on production that we need to fix asap.
All that can’t wait a week when I’m healthy?
Seriously, people lost their minds in today’s world to some bullshit.
I’m to old and to depressed to care about such idiotic things. Living my life as I want and on my own peace, don’t care everyone is running, I’m slowly walking and I like it.
It’s better to walk straight than run around like an idiot.1 -
So this happened some years ago:
The phone rings and as soon as I pick it up some fast talking sales rep begins his spiel.
"Good afternoon my name is [don't remember, calling him 'jigglybum'] and we have a device that you plug into your phone line and it will allow you to make free international calls over the internet. It's real easy to set up and you can have it on us for the first three months absolutely free, if you could just confirm your address..."
"Don't want it."
"I'm sorry sir but I think you're throwing away a massive opportunity here we're offering you free international calls."
"No you're not. You're offering me a free trial of some sort of VoIP hardware."
"We yes, but it's free for the first three months and..."
"We also don't make international calls."
"That maybe true sir but with this box you could."
"I'm really not interested in your product."
"I don't think you fully understand all the benefits..."
*there's a clicking noise followed by a dial tone for a second and a new voice*
"Hi, I'm the supervisor for 'jigglybum' and I think perhaps he is having difficulty explaining what it is that we are trying to give you here..."
"Listen to me, from what I have understood you are offering to send us a VOIP hardware device that directly connects to our broadband and facilitates international calls, and presumably any calls for that matter on a three month trial which after will presumably have a subscription fee, have I had any difficulty understanding the nature of the device and terms of use?"
"Well, no sir, that's a very accurate description, so if you could just confirm your address for me..."
"NO! As you have just admitted there was no misunderstanding about what your product is or what it does. There seems to be a real misunderstanding on your part on the concept of 'no'. We don't want this product, we don't need the product and if we want to make VOIP calls, we have Skype!"
"Ok sir, goodbye."
This is, to my knowledge the only and only time that a supervisor in a call centre has wanted to talk to ME.2 -
we are organizer of really big trade fair and wanted to place a new product. It was a landing page for exhibitors especially for the fair, the exhibitor would get a subdomain with his company name. This landingpage had some highly requested features such as a calender for scheduling meetings, some floorplan features and other stuff... long story short: not a single exhibitor booked it. it was just trash and huge waste of time. dont get me wrong, this was actually a really great idea but the endproduct just sucked... now 4 resignations later we may start a new try :D
wish i would be a more passionsted ranter/writer... i have a ton load of such things i could rant about... but most of the time i get my consolation by reading your rants here.
obligatory: fuck, shit, cunt -
The 'farewell great manager Jim' party on Monday.
The [insert name of a department] Christmas party on Wednesday, which you shouldn't miss because they want the company to be more integrated.
The [insert name of your department] Christmas party on Friday, which is separate from the other party because they want the company to be more inte... wait.
The hackathon on Saturday and Sunday, because coding all night for free to create buzz around the company's name is always fun.
The team meeting where the product manager presents all the shinny new things they're thinking about presenting to the client while our deadline is still a couple of weeks away. "And the engineering team knows exactly what to do, right?" Yeah, sure, if you say so. -
Live deployment next week Monday but Product Owner really need this new fix in.
Can you code, push to test, test it, push to acceptance test, UAT it before Friday...
It's Wednesday today 😐
Project manager says ok 😱1 -
I could use some advice. Immagine this: you recently started a new job where the people are great, the product is pretty cool and pay is good. But the code you have to work with is the biggest pile of shite you've ever seen and your manager does not want to change any of this, even after you suggest you would build something that would be a thousand times better, not only "code wise" but for the users too. What would you do?9
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Well I've got this new worker and me and him are like "great minds think alike" , we're now trying to convince the boss that a specific monitoring product that cost hundreds has an equivalent open source.... No luck so far in convincing him1
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I don't like the "hype" culture/algorithm tech industry follows these days, like seriously.
I watched Marvel Spiderman 2's new trailer and now most of my YouTube recommendations is filled with "I spotted THIS in the new trailer" or "OMG Peter said what in the new trailer?" related videos.
And my Google feed is now full of "MSM2 will have this villain" or "Peter Parker faces off new villain in MSM2" news articles.
I get it, I am interested in this product, but It doesn't mean that I have forgotten about my previous interests and potential new topics I may be interested in.4 -
I got a job where I should develop a product based on LLMs.
Expectation: oh right! I'll be working with state of the art technology! 😀
Reality: badly documented libraries that are always changing; new libraries becoming obsolete in less than a month; my product ideas were done by somebody else twice before I could finish a POC; getting dizzy trying to keep up with the latest news about LLMs 😵💫
I think I want to do basic old boring stuff again. 😐5 -
So our Chief Test Engineer left the company because of overwhelming frustration and stress. We working on new stuffs so we test our partly done product with partly done test tool developed be another of our team. His successor started to drop most of the 3rd party tools and workflows and documentations to trash expect this one unfinished test software.
Now he wants that we add more features to this software so it can replace everything he trashed already: run tests, generate test reports, generate documentations and so on.
On top of that he organized a workshop to read all this software's source code together, understand how it's works so we can rewrite the whole software from scratch.
WHAT?!1 -
Me: We need to have a developer on our core product
*We fork our core product from a private repo for new projects
Management: No.
Me: But imma die 5years early from stress and anger overdose of fixing the same problems over and over again in every new project we do and still hit deadlines which didn't account for them when we could fix them once and maintain our core product
Management: everything is fine. Lalalalalala
Me: *wonder why every senior dev has left in last few years*1 -
Fucking product owners. Churning out retarded requirements every sprint and then complaining about how the requirements haven’t been met, just to add new retarded requirements the next sprint.
Hot tip, if your product owner is obsessed over apple events, tell the cunt to go buy a new Apple Watch and suck on apples trillion dollar market value. Fucking goofy cunts.2 -
!dev
So that new keyboard I bought? They sent me a French azerty instead of a Belgian azerty layout. Meaning the special keys are in the wrong places.
It's from a third party vendor. Here was me thinking I was getting a good deal on a second hand product in a box that had been opened but returned. Think I can guess why that happened.
I contacted support who will contact the third party but I have a bad feeling about this already. Both the third party and website where I ordered this are Dutch and they are used to Qwerty. Guess I should have bought on a Belgian website at full price :(5 -
The story of how I knew I did the right thing leaving the start up I was an employee of.
It was a great place to work when I started, we had a plan and we were are working hard to make it. But pretty soon I realised that things weren't 100%. We kept altering the product and focusing on the wrong things. Our backlog grew faster than it was completed.
Pretty soon a launch planned in April was pushed back over and over again, until we finally released in November, and instead of being first on the market we were last.
We pivoted hard and I didn't believe in the new product so I quit.
The last week on the job I was finishing up some stuff and when our PO (who also was a programmer)was deploying the things I had done to production something went wrong. Now I had just integrated *his* new authorization service and I had a hunch it wasn't deployed. But he sent a message over slack with a bunch of code alterations that was the "problem". Along with some passive aggressive words about how I wasn't professional and didn't take ownership of the product.
I only added an error log that asked if the authorization service was deployed, and 10 minutes later he came up and said good job, no mention of what was fixed between now and then.
I have no regrets leaving that place. -
whining
So I'm sitting here, working my ass off developing something far above my current skills.
On the opposite side of the table sits relatively new guy, working as a part of support "department". Relatively new means that he's with the company for around 1 month.
The guy started speaking to me. I took off my headphones and listened, while still reading code. He told me about how he'll have to carry out the recruitment process for the support department today. And that he was told to present himself as a leader of the department, blah blah blah.
To be honest, I stopped listening at that moment. I got really pissed. And it's not because of the absolute lack of the professionalism of the company (srsly, make a new guy do recruitment work?). It's because I asked boss to get someone to help me half a year ago. He did employ around 3 new support people (4th today). But no one for me.
And he has the balls to tell me that I NEED to work harder to make it for deadline that he imposed. That he won't employ anyone new for me because new people could stole his "idea". Because MAYBE in a month one guy, a junior like me, will come back (he's on a break to finish his master thesis).
Product I'm working on is probably the main reason other companies are even buying the system he's reselling. As a student I'm working only half-time, so those deadlines are almost impossible.
I wonder how he'll manage if I'll get accepted for the work I'm currently applying.4 -
I absolutely treasure the bug reports we get from users. Nothing helps bring the product closer to perfection than the informed critique of end-users.
Recently, however, this one dude is filing a new fucking report every time he encounters the same fucking bug. "X happens for operation Y on file A"
"X happens for operation Y on file B"
.
.
.
"X happens for operation Y on file Z"
Jumping Jesus Christ, man, I'm pretty sure we can identify a pattern after the first two!
I don't expect him to know about the work we do to reproduce a problem after one report but fucking hell, have some faith that we'll get the picture after two or three.
These are fully detailed bug reports too, so it's not like he's just being a troll. -
Job review time,
(just a random pick from the a list).
---
"Engineering Lead"
Translation: "Chief Calculator Officer"
"Anyone can design or spec a product, get it manufactured overseas and get it to market. But will it be good? Will people buy it?"
Translation: "We're looking for a miracle"
"Take on a top notch team that is going places in Electronics, R&D and advanced product development."
Translation: "Professional Excel engineer wanted"
"This company is a little-known success story that has been operating for over X years, making mission-critical electronic equipment for use by consumers, professionals, government and industry."
Translation: "Design weapons and tamagotchis."
"Working as part of the Senior Leadership team, you will have charge of the I.P. engine and product development team spinning up new ideas and throwing them out the door."
Translation: "You're success is our success. Your failure is your failure."
"The Role
- Generate New Ideas
- Push for new products
- Drive manufacturing
- Manage a cross disciplinary team that includes Electronics, Software and Mechanical
- Project Manage new projects to completion
- Interact with marketing and sales to drive results"
Translation: "We've never hired one person to be a whole team before but we think it will work."
"On your first day, we expect:
- Strong Leadership experience and skills
- Solid Engineering Fundamentals
- Experience taking new and existing products to market
- Experience with manufacturing high-tech, mission critical equipment
- Commercial Acumen
- Bachelors in Electrical or Electronic Engineering"
Translation: "We expect you know where to hide the drugs already."
"Nice to have:
- Experience with Defense or Medical Systems
- R&D background
- MBA, B. Commerce or similar"
Translation: "By clicking on this job ad your background check is already under way."
"In return:
- A loyal and oustanding team will be there to support you
- Extremely knowledgeable experts to guide you
- Incredibly smart founders to mentor you
- The opportunity to work on a real product
- Extremely generous salary package"
Translation: "Our last dev has removed the Warrant Canary. Can you pleeease put it back?!"2 -
It's just that your team doesn't have experience in "insert platform name here" so we want to use a third party to move "insert product name here" into it.
My first thought: why don't you just train the team with the product knowledge in the new platform rather than the other way around? Does anyone else see this happen and want to eat glass every time it does?4 -
Company logic: "we need a new software manager for the program. This guy has worked on every piece of our product. Including as team lead of one of the teams. But wait he has never signed time cards. We better bring in this guy who has been in the company less than a year and is a known job shopper to do it instead."
Long story short, I am getting a new software manager that knows nothing about our product. Fun4 -
Previous company turned from Web Dev E-Mail Marketing into a Service company with more than 50% phone support so I left.
New company, Product focused on web and mobile. 2 months in: Well yeah guys, new strategy. We'll stop feature dev on the web and go into maintenance mode.
That's just great. Thank you very much.
Now I'm too lazy to go through hiring again and just feed my inner rage.
It's hard to keep it in sometimes =__= -
So a product manager emailing devs long essays on requirements? how does that sound? Aren't developers just supposed to implement the specifications? Is requirement gathering and design their job too? Maybe I need a new job before I go crazy.3
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Don't you just love it when a client turns around at this time of year and tells you that there is a new project and it's due by the middle of January!
And then they tell you the specs... Wait... What? How? Ummm... So you want a test app that is basically a fully working product that would take months to build ready in 15-20 days.
I'd rather drag my balls along sandpaper and dip them in vinegar...2 -
So I joined this digital agency where they are working on this ad-tech product and right from day one, I was given a task to implement a new feature on the product. No knowledge transfer. No onboarding process. So, I had given estimation about the task and apparently it took longer than expected. But what were they expecting. Anyways, my manager asked me to have a KT with the only senior guy that has been working there for last couple of years. And man, since the KT started, it's been hell for me. The guy is such an asshole and won't even give me a basic walkthrough of the system. He only took one call and that ended within 30 minutes. On top of that he went ahead and told the product manager that I am not keeping up and am not ready. And my product manager apparently wants me to take his place within a month. It's been only two months since I joined. I have already pushed two major features, tried to understand the system architecture, codebase and everything on my own. On top of that, I got yelled at by that senior dev in a meeting about a PR. I was quite confident guy when I joined and now I am anxious everyday at work and i am scared that they'll let me go because I won't be able to meet their unrealistic expectations. I also can't stand this senior dev and he can't stand me which makes me really demotivated to work. I have anxiety issues and now I am thinking if I stay, I am gonna mess up big time and they'll fire me or worse. I might break something in production because I didn't have proper onboarding.2
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I was adding a new API integration into the product today, half of the API Documentation is written like shit, and has mistakes in them.
Okay, I kind of solved what ever errors there were in the documentation and got the API to give a response.
Tried to simulate an error response and all I get is 'Internal Server Error'.
What fucking pieces of shit wrote an API, which doesn't provide a correct error response.
I had to write to the support team in order to get everything clarified.
The elements that were indicated as optional should be there in the request it seems, if you don't want to enter any data for that, pass an empty string to it.
Atleast they could've given a proper error response / their documentation could've been better!4 -
Note to self:
Close off ALL ways things could go wrong..
Long story short; I released a new feature, to be able to better follow up on any stock moves, their amounts, locations and even expiry dates. An older tool just bypassed that very verification and nothing was logged or taken out of stock.
~
Taking out an amount for a certain orderline has a shortcut in place to mitigate some of the mandatory steps that pickers need to take in order to verify what's being taken. This little tool only available, visible and possible for a very few select users.
I assigned some orders to one of these people, which made him think it was an urgent batch. It's only one product, for multiple orders, so he went to the location, took out the amount needed and then used the tool to quickly be able to prepare them for shipping.
This bypassed the new methods to check if the location actually had stock to take, which I had just enabled for 1 account.
Luckily I caught the miss-hap as I was monitoring that product first-hand and noticed the batch of orders was collected but the stock amount didn't update.
It was 5min before I was leaving work, so I investigated and then ran to the person in question to ask what he did; which was "I used that tool"
I facepalmed myself internally while blaming myself, as he couldn't know that it wasn't ready to use for that purpose.
The tools to fix this up are there already.. so I used that to fix some missing stock-takes manually.. Though I'll need to close that little tool for these kind of orders for sure, asap, probably when I get home, at least until I bring over its new logic to it.
Happy Tuesday? (: -
Working in an Agile software development department (12 dev teams, >100 developers) inside a very old school traditional business (15000 staff, several billion annual turnover) is an uphill struggle that I don’t know if I have the energy to persevere with.
New year is making me think I push the launch button on a product that I spent all of last year building.
For context I should add that I am a senior person / leader in the department so I have to deal with a lot of shit from the suits. -
New Year's day 10am I got a text message from the product owner.
To wish me a happy new year one would guess. But no! She was telling me that the cron job that I developed 2 years ago failed and I need to apply the change on the configuration manually.
What really irritated me was that was no matter of life and death, this could wait for us to get back at the office. Or even worse, she could have done the change herself, after all she was checking emails anyway.
What a b.2 -
I was hired 2 years ago to replace someone who was retiring after 10+ years with the company. I was up to speed quickly and have improved my processes and product in ways appreciated by many others, but mine is a position everyone is glad to have and glad they aren't doing it! I feel rather inconsequential, especially since being neglected by management has become a comfort in that I've already turned my attention to opportunities outside the company and look forward to "putting in my time" without taking on new responsibilities until I can score a job in programming/development/product management.
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When backend is slow to add fields of data, and product manager is after you, the frontend dev to add the new feature.
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Not a true dev rant but still thought I'd share:
Systems team installed new software product I've been asked to setup and test. Within 15 minutes of getting into the software I've already had to open two support tickets with the vendor. Fast forward two hours and I'm putting in a third support ticket. SMH.2 -
Client : Couple of new features are added. Check out the documentation. Deliver the product as discussed.
Me : I doubt that. With new features it's definitely take one more week than discussed.
Client : Don't glam blame. It shows the work Quality and you are Incompetence.
Me : !?!?!???1 -
I finished school 3 months ago, Ive had a traineeship for those three months. Now Im employed at that company and they want me to be the PO of a project already. Ive never been PO, any tips?
In this Project I will be both PO and mentor for interns and Im gonna have to write code for the project as well.3 -
When you start a new job and you inherit a steaming pile of shit that NEEDS to integrate with a completely separate application but after repeatedly telling your manager his requests aren’t possible, he denies it and says it is possible.
Some context. They have an old application written in MVC. They want a new application written in react. They want all the old functionality to integrate with the new functionality. I don’t just mean render different views based on the route, I mean they want both applications to integrate seamlessly to create a new application. Not to mention this new application is completely different to the old one and has requirements that aren’t even compatible with the old application.
Also. I got into trouble today for completing the sprint in 2 days and starting on user stories (that were in the sprint, not the backlog). Apparently we’re not allowed to showcase the product until the sprint ends and we go through our retrospective/demo. LMAOOOO -
Product presentation for a new module in our software suit in 5 hours.
And just now I got an email from my boss, asking if I could add the gui revamp we were planning for next version today...for the presentation...it's just a UI after all.
But yes of course, obviously I do magic and can design, implement and test a new UI from the ground...in less than 3 hours. Because we have to leave early.
Sometimes... -
That weird moment when you realise the damned developers before you haven't even opened any documentation yet were fast on dismissing the new product.
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Product was not thrilled with our estimates we gave them for the next phase of our project. So they got the veep to give us 2 new team members - a new hire and an existing senior - in hopes that it will allow us to finish a lot sooner.
Because 9 women can make a baby in a month, right? Gods forbid we consider removing anything from the scope of this phase. Mind you, there's still another phase planned after this one before we even release the product.2 -
Manager: We gotta new module to develop for our existing product. As I'm leading the team, I'll be involved in designing the module.
Me: Okay.
Manager: *Just after a couple of hours, sends me these lame block diagram which doesn't make any sense*
There you go, this is the complete architecture of the module. Start developing it.
Me: *Woah!!* 😵 -
I'm actually looking for a new job.
A friend of mine: "I heard that company X is looking for informaticians."
Me: "And what is the job exactly? Do you know which languages/technologies they are asking for?"
Friend: "Fixing computers/printers problems and form employer on how to use product Y"
Me: "No way."
Friend: "Why?"
Me: "..." (Long explanation on the difference between developer and technical support)
I should have understood when she said "informatician" instead of "developer"..1 -
Looking for someone to test a new factorization script I wrote.
https://pastebin.com/Td2XTKe6
Tested against a set of products from all primes under 1000. Worked even on numbers up to 87954921289
Worked for about 66% of the products tested.
Obviously I'm cheating a little bit because I'm checking for four conditions n%a == 0, n%a == 1, n%b == 0, and n%b == 1
It appears it is possible to generate the series from just the product, and then factor each result. The last factor in each each set of factors becomes x, and we do p%x and check for zero.
if it works, we've found our answer.
Kind of wonky but basically what its doing is taking p, tacking on a 0 to the right, and then tacking p to the right of *that*.
So if you had a product like
314
The starting number we look at is
3140314
The middle digit becomes i, and the unit digit becomes j.
Don't know why it works more often then not, and don't know if it would really be any faster.
Just think it's cool.9 -
Why don't most products follow a minimalist approach right till the end? Most start ups start like that. But when things begin to fall apart or become better they tend to deviate. While the earlier reason is understandable (because no one likes to fail so they'll do anything to not fail), the second reason seems to me more of an organisational creation than what the users want.
From my understanding as the product becomes popular positions (managerial or product) created need to justify their presence. What do they do? So the breath of fresh air brings in a lot of garbage that may not be required and would be in deviance from the main product idea.
It is debatable that audiences would not accept such ideas that are being brought in, because hey audiences are smart. And they are. But the organisation in order to justify the original wrong decision tends to push their new features (through offers or marketing campaigns). This makes the organisation invested into a wrong direction and security of jobs of the new managers/product people. Win win situation, but lose lose for the organisation and the original product. -
Created whole UAM System in Product for client. After the deployment client asked me
"In which table should I run the query to create a new user." -
So this past week I was supposed to start on a new feature on our companies product. Started the week off with a kidney stone and the rest of the week on pain meds. Too fucked to actually get anything done. RIP. Hope they aren't too mad.3
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Let me just say that I've been playing whack a mole with a new feature for while now. And it's becoming very tiring.
TLDR; CTO is changing the way we're going to implement this, every other day.
June 1st,
CEO: let's implement feature AAA,
CTO: we're going to have a call with Andy to tell us all about his product that will make this super easy, call will be June 4th.
Days before June 4th,
Me: Researchs product X, makes demo works flawlessly.
June 4th,
Call all good, few tips from Andy. We come to the pricing section of Product X
CTO: this will not work, pricing doesn't fit on our budget, fair enough.
June 7th -11th
Me: research altenative approach. Makes second demo.
CTO: Works good, seems to have too many moving parts, let's have call with Bob to check Product Y. It should make our lifes easier.
ME: Geee, ok let's check it out.
June 14th,
Call with Bob, all good, product has a fair price, stuff is experimental.
CTO: let's use Product Y, and just use what we get from their api now, and worry about changes later.
Me: Hmmm, that's a bit risky, but ok, you the boss, right?, starts again new demo. API doesn't work as documented.
Lots of trial and error to figure out how the api is working now, finally demo works well,
June 17th,
API changed, now it works as documented, (expected as it is experimental), previous demo doesn't work anymore.
June 18th,
Redoing research. inputs are completely different from Product Y now, need to redo all that is working and do and a lot more of research.
Go live is scheduled for end of next week, I hope that the API is stable now, and that I get to go live on schedule.
It is funny to see, that it would probably been the same if we just waited on the API to stabilize, and check the pricing section before choosing a product? Who knows.
Anyways, I actually feel happy that over the years I developed the patience to work with ever changing situations like this one.4 -
It is always great when I download a major release of a software I love and it only gets better.
1Password new version is exactly that. It took a great product and made it better integrated with the laptops I use every day.
Not really ranting... but I wish this happened more often. -
Management suddenly decide to push for an early go-live for a product being worked on by another dev team in the company. As a result we are pulled in to help and get extra tasks loaded onto our sprint.
My co-worker pulled an all nighter to get the extra work done.
I emailed the project manager to remove items from my sprint to make space for the new work.
Am I lazy, or smart?6 -
Extremely frustrated with the release process and versioning system at my current company. Don't know if this is same everywhere or the half ass release managers can't think of a better way here.
Basically for any client raised issue that can't wait for next release are built as a hotfix. However hotfixes are never bundled togather or shiped to other clients. This is causing a vicious chain, two clients raise two separate issues on same version. Instead of fixing them as single hotfix (however minor the issues) we create two hotfix versions for each with only their issue. A week later same clients come back with the issue the other raised. Once again instead of bundling what is now effectively same code we build hotfixes on top of the clients respective branches. We now have two branches to maintain with same codebase. No matter how serious issue, the hotfix is never made generally available and always created on client's specific hotfix version.
Now that was an example for only two clients, in reality we have released five patch versions of a product in last 2 years. Each product version contains about a dozen artifacts (webapps, thick clients, etc) with its own version. Each product version being shipped to various clients. Clients being big banks never take a patch of product even if it fixes their issues and continues requesting hotfix. We continue building hotfixes on client branch and creat ever increasing tech debt. There is never a chance to clean up or new development. Just keep doing hotfix after hotfix of same things.
To top if all off, old branches are still in svn while new in git. Old branches still compile with ant new with maven. Old still build with java 5,6,7 while current with 8. Old still build from old jenkins serve pipelines while new has different build server. Old branches had hardcoded integration db details which no longer exists so if tou forget to change before releasing it doesn't work.
Please tell me this is not normal and that there are better ways to do this? Apologies I think I rambled on for too long 😅5 -
Product needs you to work on a new high priority project ASAP after you finish your current work, deadline ~4 weeks. Also product hasn't finished their side of the breakdown yet.
ugh i just wanna be retired3 -
Started new contract recently, their main product is aiming to be some kind of automation holy grail for business, basically low code nonsense integrating with most of the industry standard tools like sap or confluence. Their entire infrastructure is setup manually, slowly transitioning from on premise to AWS. No infra as code, no playbooks, not even scripts, just "engineers" painstakingly clicking the UI. They don't seem to see the irony of being automation company that doesn't use automation, but I'm having a good laugh at least.
-
Well fuck. I am experiencing over-engineering first hand.
I am the single dev responsible for developing a small feature but which is an identity to our whole product(feel free to guess it here). This is quite simple I thought, I can just modify the constants which are being used in the source code and I can finish it off in a week tops. I asked all the relevant teams over which this feature would have dependencies and they gave me a green signal. Setup Jenkins configuration and everything for this new feature. With a wide grin on my face, I sent out a pull request. Now the architect of our product declined the pr saying to change everything from the bottom up giving the reason that it would be configurable sometime later in the future. Now mind you, I get it if this feature could change over time and needs customability. But it has been the same since last seven years and would probably not change again for a couple of years ahead [you have to take my word for it.]. Its not that the guy is a douche or anything, he is one of the best dev I have ever personally came across and I highly respect and admire him. But there has to be a trade off between the effort you are putting in versus the benefit you get. Now I have to touch almost every file, super carefully look in the whole product if a bug creeps out from anywhere and change the existing code to a point where it doesn't even make sense to me anymore, and write tests ofcourse.
wubba lubba dub dub!2 -
1) Had to fix severe bugs in a dynamic UI (configuration-driven forms) component.
Recognized undocumented Copy/Paste/Modify/FuckUp driven variations of the same component all over the project. Unsurprisingly, the implementations covered 99% of the antipattern catalog on wiki.c2.com and could compete with brainfuck in regard to human-readable code.
Escalated the issue, proposed a redesign using a new approach, got it approved.
Designed, Implemented, tested and verified the new shared and generic component. Integrated into the main product in the experimental branch. Presented to tech lead/management. Everyone was happy and my solution opened even more possibilities.
Now the WTF moment: the product with the updated dynamic UI solution never has been completely tested by a QA engineer despite my multiple requests and reminders.
It never got merged into baseline.
New initiatives to fix the dynamic UI issues have been made by other developers. Basically looking up my implementation. Removing parts they do not understand and wondering why the data validation does not work. And of course taking the credit.
2) back in 2013, boss wanted me to optimize batch processing performance in the product I developed. Profiling proved that the bottleneck ist not my code, but the "core" I had to use and which I must never ever touch. Reported back to him. He said he does not care and the processing has to get faster. And I must not touch the "core".
(FYI: the "core" was auto-generated from VB6 to VB.Net. Stored in SourceSafe. Unmaintainable, distributed about a bunch of 5000+ LoC files, eye-cancer inducing singlethreaded something, which had naive raw database queries causing the low performance.) -
I kinda hate brand bias, when people don't have an open mind when judging new products.
some people are ready, up late, waiting for next apple keynote just so they have stuff to rip off.
"animoji is so pointless"
then don't use it buddy :)
"apple tracks you"
https://maps.google.com/locationhis...
"apple product limits you, google products allow you to do a lot more"
- apple iphone:
· download apps
· surf the web
· make calls and send texts
· do things offline
· use the native devRant app
pixelbook/chromeos:
· browse the fucking web
· there's a fucking 'write protect' screw in the motherboard so you can't fuck anything up
(yes I know, generally android is more customizable, but you'd expect more from a laptop over a computer)
I'm not an apple fanboy, I could make this rant about android hate, too, but because a product isn't for you doesn't mean it's not for everyone.6 -
Wrote a new feature for our flagship product in C. Worked perfectly, no issues. I was told to wait before submitting to SVN.
Because my company is a little cheap in engineering, they took my Green Hills license for another dev to use. I wasn't using it, and now can't compile.
Then, a month later, I was asked to submit my feature to the repo, they needed it in done version, do I did. Still not able to recompile to see if other changes broke anything...
As you probably guessed, no one's code complied after pulling from the repo! Big embarrassment. Weeks later I was told that it wasn't my fault in the end... I don't remember how my code impacted it, but man, it was a bad day for this dev.
Never again!1 -
Story of my life - Feature creep, creeping featurism or featuritis is the ongoing expansion or addition of new features in a product, such as in computer software. These extra features go beyond the basic function of the product and can result in software bloat and over-complication rather than simple design.
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Xcode is Apple’s reason to shame.
It is unbelievable how Xcode can exist at all as product/tool of the world most big and important company as Apple.
I’m pissed off every time I see Xcode update notifications, it takes me 3 days to get my projects running on Xcode new $hitty versions.5 -
Question for my fellow devs:
Do you feel like you are spending too much time on maintaining ur devops/infrastructure rather than focusing on the actual product?
Do you think your company would be willing to spend a bit of money to outsource scaling problems to someone else and just focus on the product?
Ik we got lots of fancy new CI platforms like Circle CI GH actions etc but like I personally feel like I’m doing certain infrastructure tasks twice when I look at the two different codebases I work on.8 -
This one time last year a colleague found out that some data went missing and suggested to recover the data from a backup. When trying to create a new database instance in the Google Cloud Platform (if everything works it's amazing!) it failed.
Not knowing why this happened, I tried to revert that backup to the production database, after creating a backup using the GCP. Needless to say that failed as well, resulting in a corrupted database instance where I couldn't access the created backups anymore.
This all went at around 10pm and the only users of our product are currently in the same timezone and use it from around 7.30AM until 6PM so no one besides our team knew the server was down.
After a long night chatting Google's support team the database was successfully recovered and the only harm done was sleep depravation for me and a colleague.
Apparently there was a bug in the GCP. It was resolved in two hours and the last time a breaking bug was in that piece was more than seventy days earlier.
I did at least learn to create local backups as well, instead of relying on the tools of the same product...
Best: the moment I saw the corrupted database spin up again and not losing my job because of it. -
Fuck, the gas spring in my ergo knee stool at home has given up. Now it's in the lowest position, not that ergo anymore, which also tore the rubber gaiter on the spring piston. On top of that, the seat cover is so worn out that I had to duct tape it so that the filling doesn't crumble out too much.
That thing is 20 years old, and the manufacturer discontinued the product years ago. Buy a new one? Noooo. Modern quality would be worse. So I ordered a generic gas spring, let's see whether I can install it, plus a moped fork gaiter. And then hire some professional upholsterer to finally get a luxury leather cover.
That will likely still be cheaper than buying the closest modern product that is even in a similar class.6 -
I’m now in my third try at attempting to set up reasonably priced shipping for a small volume ecommerce website. First it was UPS which charged more to ship than the product was worth, and ended up just dropping it off at USPS for local purchasers. Then it was USPS but apparently I chose the wrong WooCommerce plugin because it’s meant for high volume (but doesn’t say so in the description). Now I have to get the plugin maker to swap it to Stamps.com and I have to set up a whole new account there and no idea if it’ll even work. FML.
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3 or 4 weeks ago me and management had a talk about new features in our product...
So we implemented the new features and then we released the app...
Today I got a really long bug report that summarizes into the following sentence -> BUG: Everything works exactly as we talked 4 weeks ago.... And apparently that is bad 😣
Like c'mon dudes if now it is a bug then why the fuck I needed to code that feature?! Time totally wasted for nothing! 😤
Fix My Lighthouse!1 -
Every once in a while you find an awesome Product Manager who makes Dev life amazing... sadly, he’s looking for new work now, anybody need a truly amazing Agile PM at a kick-ass company?
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Have you ever found a infinite task? Well, I did.
So, the software that I'm working now was under responsibility of another company for development and maintenance (I'll call them X) from 2014 to last month , and the company I work for was handling only with the business part. Now we took all the development for us as well.
This software has a lot of reports , so it has a lot of templates for this reports.
When X was handling the software, they asked the client and the old project manager if they wanted the templates to have the client's products dynamic (no need to change the template when adding a new product) or hardcoded for some products they already had, they choose hardcoded because it would be faster. Butterfly effect.
Fast forward to this week, the team leader designated a task for me, It looked easy at first, just fix 2 templates, easy.
Oh boy, I was so wrong.
I fixed the first template, discovering in the process the hardcoded things, had to add the product reference in a lot of places.
So i went to the second item, a super template that they use to put together some smaller templates.
It was really weird, I couldn't find all the templates that it was supposed to use, and I didn't really know the exact problem, the only thing I knew was that it was not being generated, the reason could be the super template itself or one of the 15 smaller templates, that could happen to have sub templates.
So I called the team leader and explained to him wtf was happening, he called the senior business analyst, that called the PM, we agreed that it would be infinite because of those fucking hardcoded things, they prepared a excel sheet with this and a lot of other problems and will send this to the client, explaining that we'll need a lot of time to put this new product up and running.
Now I'm in the middle of this shit storm seeing a time of darkness in the future.
Ps: This new product was supposed to be inserted in the software since last November, when it was under X responsability, and they analyzed it and said that it would take 190 hours to be completely done, the client refused. It was the first rain drop of what would become a shit storm. -
wk50 will be fun! Developing 3 new projects. 2 real ones and 1 mockup to show a client how our product will improve his daily life. All based on newest web technologies.
-
Alright so when I take over the world in my dreams I will burn all non modifiable devices (so many new Samsung phones and every Mac product, though that is for separate reasons, etc) in a cleansing blaze. And possibly their owners because they are witches, but the church of Aquarius has yet to ratify an official position on witchcraft. Also we are fairly green so the cleansing fire is more symbolic than anything.
Anyway, QUICK. Someone give me a good name for my controlled purge/culling. Bonus points for dramatic sounding names that are secretly punny/funny (haha inside jokes in dark times). This definitely isn't for a novel that I don't want to give you any credit for. -
Sitting in a meeting discussing writing end user docs on a new feature and one of the product managers literally said "we'll end up picking a number out of the air."
-
My team decided to do a MOB programming in one of our tickets.
New joiner: Perfect we did a mob yesterday .
Me: Great, that's good. How did it go?
New joiner: Well, we work together in the gaming room next to each other and trying to solve the issue. I think it's very productive.
Me: Awesome! Let's do it again today... When we started the MOB, all of them are using their own laptop. And I was like.. so, this is how you did the MOB yesterday?
New guy: Yes.
Me: This is not a MOB programming... MOB programming uses only 1 screen, 1 driver and everyone work together, will tell the driver what to do, we need to exchange the driver every 10 to 15 minutes, everyone can be a driver. (devs, qa, ux, product) and do a retro after.
New guy: ah.. wow! Interesting.3 -
Thanks google for creating the illusion of an option to change the shipping address for a repair order. You even mention the new address in your notification email, but when I click on UPS tracking, I can see that you sent the shipment to the old address, which is in a different city where I can't quickly go to pick up my repaired phone. After charging an extra 95,- Euros for additional damage supposedly not covered by my warranty. Lucky you that my old phone had connection problems with the shitty Vodafone station wi-fi router, which is one of the few reasons that I still even want to use a google hardware product. Thanks google for just being slightly less wretched and mediocre than your competitors, that might grant you some more years before you will be buried in history forever. Pixel phones are just like Macbooks: high quality product and good marketing, good enough to make your customer accept everything else being bullshit. Google search is even worse, but based on the same concept: just suck a little less than your competitors but don't waste any effort trying to actually be really good at anything.3
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I wish I had a product owner that wanted to own the product. Or a BA who thought their role was more than "get the developers to have meetings with the business". Or a QA team that didn't want to log all new features as bugs because "if we make bugs we're doing our jobs right?" Or a project manager, that I dunno, makes sure everyone understands their roles.1
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Ok, So I am just fed up with these project delivery dates. These are the most irritating aspect of any project.
My current project is already delayed 3 times, because of the optimistic biases of the team lead.
Developers were forced to work over weekends. The QA cycle is taking more time than the dev cycle itself, and it's very irritating waking up with a new bug in the JIRA notifications.
Everytime we reach the delivery dates, there will be multiple bug items on each and everyone's plate that you just can't release the product.
I want to know if anyone feels the same ? How does your management takes care of these delivery dates ?1 -
Looking for new jobs and all interesting jobs require on-site (or hybrid, which means I have to relocate) and pay less than Remote companies.
Remote ones, pay much more but the product is so boring and uninspiring.4 -
Fuck my company, sincerly.
So Im crunching my ass off, to make product, there is +- fuckton of changes that for example require refactoring flow of certain things, restructure of how shit work, Im +- 2nd weekend now, and most heavy features are cleared.
I work till late. constantly I have someone with stupid shit like calls, indeed Im needed for that stuff but also, that slows down progress of this project. Just sake of example friday 18:00 I had call (I work till 16:00) about new minor and frankly easy feature. Today, morning 8:30 one call, than 13:00 long call, Ive done the feature, didn't push it to alpha. yet though.
Now during that call that started 13:00 I get yelled on that all ordered features aren't on prod yet (I throw them to alpha becouse manual tests must be done as standard here).
Dude what the motherfuck. Im literally wearing my ass off to deliver your stupid product becouse I know its critical for company but it does not mean I can do it all in one fucking night.
F**k off and shut your mouth up and let me work for f**k sakes.
Ah also, stop f**king remotely micromanage me you little piece of sh*t.
Thanx for allowing me to vent out,
Peace.2 -
When you are leading in updating a product to the latest version of a framework, what allows the integration of webpack into it, and so also allows the usage of babel, what allows the usage of ES6 syntax.
And now everyone in the company started calling the "new javascript codes" a part of the framework, even though i explained multiple times how it works.1 -
I hate surprises.
I join office after a short leave and the other guy is out with a completely new product I have no clue of. (surprise 1)
Next, he's on leave and now I'm asked to fix bugs.(surprise 2)
Just for the curious, I ended up successfully fixing them and adding 2 features. -
ColdFusion and ZKOSS framework documentation has been my reading for this first week at the new job.
The nervousness and anxiety is starting to settle down but won't be gone for a while I think. I'm excited and eager to start actually working on our product to both prove my worth (after being selected over 40 or so other applicants) and calm the hell down about my competence.1 -
I finally got the clarity on my relationship.
Atleast I think I did.
I am officially done with Microsoft. I mean the only useful and sensible products left are Outlook and Excel.
Funnily both the products have hit their maturity stage and now MS is trying to bloat them. But still to a reasonable extent.
What other MS products are worth touching? Wait.. I legit can't think of any now.
Next on tagret, Google and Apple. Lol
Perhaps only Apple product I ever want to interact with will be (future tense) Apple Music (well because lossless and the fact that that the product is the reason for existence of the company).
NGL Steve had the right vision on Music. They tagged things right in their iTunes catalogue. But then MTV happened.
And now Spotify is the new MTV. Fuck me in ass someone.
So only Google? Well I have already sold my soul to them. What's more remaining?8 -
I don't think I wanna be a dev anymore
Just a year ago, I was doing many side projects for fun, aching for proper coding tasks at work.
Now, I got a senior title but I don't want to do ANYTHING, I don't want to learn this new service or learn how to develop new stuff, I've lost all desire to learn something new. I just want a simple af simple low needs job, but also want good pay XD I know, it's stupid, but I really don't care what tech I use or how exciting the product is, I just want a simple repetitive job with little stress and deadlines and good pay
How do you motivate yourselves to get through the day and do your tasks? Honestly every PR review I'm shocked other engineers care so much about the code, they're obv right, I just wonder where that desire to maintain good coding practices comes from7 -
I am having an introspective moment as a junior dev.
I am working in my 3rd company now and have spent the avg amount of time i would spent in a company ( 1- 1.5 years)
I find myself in similar problems and trajectories:
1. The companies i worked for were startups of various scales : an edtech platform, an insurance company (branch of an mnc) and a b2b analytics company
2. These people hire developers based on domain knowledge and not innovative thinking , and expect them to build anything that the PMs deem as growth/engagement worthy ( For eg, i am bad at those memory time optimising programming/ ds/algo, but i can make any kind of android screen/component, so me and people like me get hired here)
3. These people hire new PMs based on expertise in revenue generation and again , not on the basis of innovative thinking, coz most of the time these folks make tickets to experiment with buttons and text colors to increase engagement/growth
4. The system goes into chaos mode soon since their are so many cross operating teams and the PMs running around trying to boss every dev , qa and designer to add their changes in the app.
5. meanwhile due to multiple different teams working on different aspects, their is no common data center with up to date info of all flows, products and features. the product soon becomes a Frankenstein monster.
6. Thus these companies require more and more devs and QAs which are cogs in the system then innovative thinkers . the cogs in the system will simply come, dimwittingly add whatever feature is needed and goto home.
7. the cogs in system which also start taking the pain of tracking the changes and learning about the product itself becomes "load bearing cogs" : i.e the devs with so much knowledge of the product that they can be helpful in every aspect of feature lifecycle .
8. such devs find themselves in no need for proving themselves , in no need for doing innovative work and are simply promoted based on their domain knowledge and impact.
My question is simply this : are we as a dev just destined to be load bearing cogs?
we are doing the work which ideally a manager should be doing, ie maintaining confluence docs with end to end technical as well as business logic info of every feature/flow.
So is that the only definition of a Software Engineer in a technical product?
then how come innovations happen in companies like meta Microsoft google open ai etc?
if i have to guess as a far observer, i would say their diversity in different fields helps them mix and match stuff and lead to innovative stuff.
For eg, the android os team in google has helped add many innovative things in google cloud product and vice versa.
same is with azure and windows . windows is now optomissed to run in cloud machines when at one point it was just a horrible memory hogging and slow pc OS
for small companies, 1 ideology/product/domain is their hero ideology/product/domain .
an insurance company tries to experiment with stuff related to insurances,health,vehicles,and the best innovations they come up with is "lets give user a discount in premium if they do 5000 steps a day for an year".
edtech would say "lets do live streaming for children apart from static videos"
but Android team at google said , "since ai team is doing so well, lets include ai in various system apps and support device level models" ~ a much larger innovation as 2 domains combined to make a product
The small companies are not aiming to be an innovative product, they are just aiming to be a monopoly product. and this is kinda sad2 -
From: https://cloud.google.com/vpc/docs/...
---
Updating firewall rules:
You can modify some components of a firewall rule, such as the specified protocols and ports for the match condition. You cannot modify a firewall rule's name, network, the action on match, and the direction of traffic.
If you need to change the name, network, or the action or direction component, you must delete the rule and create a new one instead.
---
REALLY???? goddamn delete and create a new rule to damn changing even its name???
And they wonder why their goddamn cloud won't take off? hell... how can this even be a Google product!!??5 -
When you work with a client who will only use Fireworks for graphics but you only have one dying old machine with a licensed copy and Adobe won't give you keys even though you bought them years ago (and can prove it!) and you can't buy new keys because they don't sell them and even if we had them we can't download it any more.
WTF Adobe!! It's a dead product! We don't want support or anything. Just give us the feckin' keys and the bloody installer!!4 -
So I made a couple slight modifications to the formula in the previous post and got some pretty cool results.
The original post is here:
https://devrant.com/rants/5632235/...
The default transformation from p, to the new product (call it p2) leads to *very* large products (even for products of the first 100 primes).
Take for example
a = 6229, b = 10477, p = a*b = 65261233
While the new product the formula generates, has a factor tree that contains our factor (a), the product is huge.
How huge?
6489397687944607231601420206388875594346703505936926682969449167115933666916914363806993605...
and
So huge I put the whole number in a pastebin here:
https://pastebin.com/1bC5kqGH
Now, that number DOES contain our example factor 6229. I demonstrated that in the prior post.
But first, it's huge, 2972 digits long, and second, many of its factors are huge too.
Right from the get go I had hunch, and did (p2 mod p) and the result was surprisingly small, much closer to the original product. Then just to see what happens I subtracted this result from the original product.
The modification looks like this:
(p-(((abs(((((p)-(9**i)-9)+1))-((((9**i)-(p)-9)-2)))-p+1)-p)%p))
The result is '49856916'
Thats within the ballpark of our original product.
And then I factored it.
1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 12, 23, 29, 46, 58, 69, 87, 92, 116, 138, 174, 276, 348, 667, 1334, 2001, 2668, 4002, 6229, 8004, 12458, 18687, 24916, 37374, 74748, 143267, 180641, 286534, 361282, 429801, 541923, 573068, 722564, 859602, 1083846, 1719204, 2167692, 4154743, 8309486, 12464229, 16618972, 24928458, 49856916
Well damn. It's not a-smooth or b-smooth (where 'smoothness' is defined as 'all factors are beneath some number n')
but this is far more approachable than just factoring the original product.
It still requires a value of i equal to
i = floor(a/2)
But the results are actually factorable now if this works for other products.
I rewrote the script and tested on a couple million products and added decimal support, and I'm happy to report it works.
Script is posted here if you want to test it yourself:
https://pastebin.com/RNu1iiQ8
What I'll do next is probably add some basic factorization of trivial primes
(say the first 100), and then figure out the average number of factors in each derived product.
I'm also still working on getting to values of i < a/2, but only having sporadic success.
It also means *very* large numbers (either a subset of them or universally) with *lots* of factors may be reducible to unique products with just two non-trivial factors, but thats a big question mark for now.
@scor if you want to take a look.5 -
dear amazon,
would you please be so kind and explain me, a native german speaker, how to give more german responds within my german skill to match the german language?
also are you fucking kidding me presenting new unheard silly issues every new submission and needing four days to answer? you don't want to be alexa sounding and acting natural, do you?
your fucking silly certification process takes the whole fun out of free-of-charge-enhancing the use of your own product.
yours cincerely
for real, coding skills is fun, but never ever promise a client any deadline. amazon will definitively screw you. dumbasses.
FUUUUUCKSHITDAMNARSEHOLESSILLYBITCHES3 -
!rant
This morning I went to our PM.
After he went down on his knees and prayed to me (Yes. I managed to do a Feature he wanted soon) we watched a product gif of a new release of the framework we're using.
We watched it for 10 minutes. Was very relaxing
I think we're getting crazy -
According to Lunduke, Google code has now 25% AI generated (only new part I assume) code and is doing layoffs because of that and prevents raises. We wouldnt be replaced by AI but if we work so fast with it, some still are if there's not enough work left anymore. But I also think that Google is the type of company where most people are doing unimportant stuff anyway. What sick stuff they must have with so many developers. There's not daily a new product or so30
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We are launching a new product soon. The C-levels have decided to call it "Foo Bar" (fictive name).
Now all our products are called:
"Foo Desktop"
"Foo Mobile"
"Foo Bar"
Nearly all internal & external reports previously was that "Foo" has problems. We nearly never know if they are talking about the desktop app or mobile app. Soon we will not know for sure if they report a problem about "Bar", Desktop or Mobile.
All 3 applications uses a different tech stack with their unique problems :') -
Learned Angular2+, I'm used to eclipse, I should probably install some Angular extension... Found a great extension in the marketplace, installed it... Found out it's not free and it's expensive as hell, and the best part, you have to keep buying it every year!
Why can't I just pay that shit once? It's not a service, it's a fucking product! I don't mind paying for some new features, but why the fuck should I pay for the same software over and over?3 -
Working as a Dev for a while now, I tell new people not to bother with it. There is never any job satisfaction as people in charge never understand the basics.
Instead of learning to write efficient code, figure out how to solve real business problems, work towards a maintainable flexible product to quickly deliver value on changing requirements, write automated tests to improve quality, maintainability and prevent live issues - basically do anything a good Dev strives for - you will just constantly end up working for people with no interest beyond the next couple days, on a shit code base that no one can understand, with people that don't want to learn anything about software design and just check boxes off.
Apart from pay this must be the worst career possible in a technical field.4 -
I must deploy a new solution today so my product owner came to ask if I finished and asked a new feature for today asap.
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So how do you find motivation to finish a work project which is supposed to "go long"?
So, umm, this is weird, but i have been in this situation a few times and i am not sure if i deal with them correctly.
- the company proposes a brand new feature : a feature which never existed in the product before.
- they have high level directions (both business logics and technical) on how its supposed to be build
-they set vague but comfortable timelines (20-30days) to complete it
- they align me as the main dev for frontend, some x guy for backend , some y guy for parallel frontend (ios/web) and kinda forget about us.
- the business requirements are evolved/cleared as we go on making the product, the backend keeps on providing evolving apis which get stable over time.
- the business ppl shows that yeah there is no pressure and we won't mind extending this for release as other systems will be "obviously" taking time.
- our (the folks on new feature) feature is sidelined .nd we are rarely talked about until we reach those deadlines and at that time we are questioned.
I... am not a powerful performer in these situations. adding a new feature required solving some major problems again and again , while solving smaller problems too, so as the product finally takes shape . for eg:
1. i will start fast by adding all the possible screens, their abstract code, their navigation logic, their xmls etc
2. then based on designs, i will try creating designs a bit
3. then once the apis arrive, i start adding them and modify the logic to handle those.
4. meanwhile many smaller problems come up , like when sending an image from one screen to the previous screen, the thumbnail don't show up, so i spend 5+ hours ensuring that it works precisely . or how i could make 3 api calls in async and make the upload flow better.
5. this goes on for days, until and i and other people start to realise that my project is not upto the point of completion
i keep getting distracted from the original goal of making a working poc first and then fixing the nuances2 -
Why the fuck would Google promote Jetpack Compose as a stable toolset when it doesn't even support a basic feature such as a scrollbar.
A. Fucking. Scrollbar.
LazyColumn can't even come close to being as powerful as Recyclerview.
Here's an idea, before launching something and touting it as something usable, and encouraging people to drop the old, battle tested tool for the new shiny one, how about you make sure the new doesn't lack features present in the old one?
Seems logical, right?
Methinks somebody was just looking for a promotion because, clearly, Jetpack Compose is a half-baked product.
Now, developers will have to suffer because project managers will read about the new framework and ask devs to use it, then wonder why the app is suffering.2 -
Whatever be the current trend on Linked-In, at the end of the day the product development life cycle remains quite the same.
Still, as developers which general domains in software do you think would flourish in the near future?
My picks (not in order) -
>> Cyber security : automation, both offensive and defensive
>> Block chain : trustable data platforms
>> Applied AI : a few key models, applied to all niches, bettering existing UX
>> IOT : wearables, embeddables, smart appliances
>> AR : Navigation prompts, real time info about real life objects
>> VR : Immerse entertainment. (Metaverse 🤮)
>> Quantum computing : first gen costly commercial releases, new algos
What would you add or subtract from this?1 -
In your opinion, what is the mostly preferable scenario at a hackathon: to build a product using well-known technologies or to learn something new?2
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Your product is not big enough until it reaches a stage when new features are kept hidden and your users explore and market them for you.
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I hate my Scrum Master. Normally he doesn't even checks pull requests, and when you need his help, 80% of the time he's missing. Now that our boss is the new Product Owner of the application, the SM is bugging us A LOT
So fuck him, go away to do whatever the fuck you did before. Stop pretending you "work" -
Thoughts on the new Google product line? I'm really excited about the advances in AI and assistant integration. I also preordered the XL 2 (with a free Home mini).3
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Me: Assigned to do some NoSQL injections test cases in December on Jira by product owner.
After asking him about it, he said it can be vague and it’s only for developers to get an idea. I also have this restriction where I can’t really keep actually data or databases in our test sample application, so I could only mock mongodb. Product owner says just mongo is fine.
I do it. Now it’s January, product owner away for a month we so director is managing it. She then schedules me to talk to database team. I show them the very simple test cases which essentially just inject payloads I found online into different parameters specified in test case. They say if that’s it. I say yes. They say what’s the point of this. I said that it’s probably to test your database clients and ensure they’re rejecting bad Malicious input? They then keep asking but I’m just the dev and tell them the product owner is away. Then the guy calls my test case essentially useless and the others agree. Then they tell me to do it for other databases which I can’t mock like couchbase even tho my PO said it’s fine for mongo only.
Am I just being silly here? I am pretty new to working in a dev environment so please feel free to be blunt.4 -
For some reason viber decides to update its self without asking!!!! And now I have to accept their new terms and conditions???? Why did you force update your product in MY machine without asking first????2
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when you gotta generate some product ideas and work for the first time at a new company when you've spent your career as a heads down code monkey
bruh i dont know any of the stats or data, or the product yet -
For me, at work, it's very important to have an inspiring figure with whom I can interact and in lucky cases, get to work with.
I recently changed companies and in my previous company, inspiring people were left, so left.
Now in my new company, I have met 5 6 people and not finding anyone inspiring enough, everyone is young, I am also only 27 but still I'm an old soul. My manager is young and he's chill person but I'm not at all inspired by him I don't think he tries to charm anyone anyway. All other developers too in the team are just meh. Product is good, so I'm looking for work but losing the motivation to do good and better each day as I don't have anyone I want to become like.
:( -
Today I had the chance to participate as a community member of an ecommerce platform to represent the community and vendor towards developers that are getting in touch with a new product from the vendor. This event was completely covered by the vendor and was awesome in many different ways. Features, tutorials, workshop, presentation, attendees.
Previously I worked on a closed source patent management software and one felt stuck and rigid. The only contact outside were customers. They were sort of the community and friendly as well just without technical knowledge. Events with the customers with a hands on the product was also covered by the vendor and great in their kind.
I am unsure what the reason for the different feeling towards this is. Is it about being a dev at a company that let me participate on a vendor product compared to be the vendor? Is it about the product license? The external people being devs or no-devs? Do you have similar experiences after switching jobs?
They were both friendly so it is not just about people being nice. Both products dont personally affect me as I neither file a patent or trademark myself nor do I own a web shop. -
This quarantine has been killing my neck. I’m always looking down at my phone and finally understand the real effect of Text Neck.
However, I found this new app on product hunt that notifies you to hold your phone with good posture and it is a LIFE CHANGER!!
Check it out: http:///www.producthunt.com/posts/... -
Have the developpers from Microsoft who made the new version of Outlook.com even tested their product on smartphones ? I can't delete my mails from the mobile version and everything take years to make -_-"3
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Cereal is one of the most popular breakfast foods worldwide. According to the National Cereal Day website, Americans consume approximately 100 billion bowls of cereal every year. With such a high demand for cereal, manufacturers are constantly looking for ways to make their products stand out. Custom cereal boxes are an excellent way to differentiate your product from competitors. In this article, we will explore the benefits of custom cereal boxes.
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If you are also looking to increase your sales, get custom cereal boxes from OXO Packaging.
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The feeling you get when the people in charge of packaging and installation of the product can't give you an answer to the question: "How is the product packaged, so I can include the new features?"
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Learn more about networking, revisit computer science fundamentals, memorise agile frameworks, practice DDD properly, learn about basic property and conveyancing law for my new job, get through 1 tech book every 2 weeks, revisit Linux as it's been a long time, learn the basics of developing and deploying with azure, learn terraform and docker, finally finish building my own product that has been going for 3 years now, continue learning about mobile development and build a mobile app for my new product.
Should be fine xD5
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