adding //To do in my code be like

Every time when I have nothing to do...

I just had a client complaining on the phone that she read my database design documents and that they are all wrong and need to be done again. Because things like varchar and int are confusing. And nobody understands what they mean. She asked around and nobody understood it.

Ooh, and I should place the customer name in more then one table because it would be handy to have in several places.

Spend a hour on the phone trying to explain that these documents are not intended for her. They are not for her to understand.

I make these documents to build a stable product and in case something bad happens to me its easier to pick up for another developer.

Long story short.. I'm currently making a document that explains the database design... Getting paid for it..... But fucking hell. Somebody save me.

When you are programming and you feel philosophical

Pretty much sums it up.

A: you need to learn how to figure out stuff yourself.

B: how do i do that

3:00.
You turn off the PC.
You went to bed to sleep.
You realized you didn't have dinner.
You are hungry.
You are lazy and tired to get up.
You are in dilemma.
You are pretty screwed.

Not really a dev thing, but ...
Source: Codechef Tweet

So, as everyone knows on here by now (or, a lot of ranters), I am a fervid privacy person.

Appearantly a new surveillance law in my country is about to extend mass surveillance/hacking a lot. So here a rundown of what they are about to be allowed to do (stuff that is not okay imo and this is the reason I am so pro-privacy):

- Mass Data Gathering: The intelligence agency over here (lets call it IA from now) can pretty much record everything send through the country.

- Extra Protection: If they want to conduct surveillance on journalists/lawyers, they have to go through extra channels first at least.

- Data/survaillance sharing: The IA is allowed to share their raw/filtered data with foreign intelligence agencies without limits. Also, they're allowed to conduct surveillance based on foreign requests.

- Secret DNA database: A secret DNA database will be created which can store the DNA profiles of any person who has commited any kind of crime. These profiles are allowed to be stored for a maximum of 30 years. This database is allowed to be shared with any foreign intelligence agency.

- Hacking: Unlimited power to hack any device deemed neccesary to hack in relation to crime. From computers to smartphones and so on. Also, it's allowed to use zero-days without reporting them to the vendor (we have seen what can go wrong with that through the ShadowBrokers scandal).

- Automatic Database Collection: They are allowed to directly tap into any database they see required (banks, healthcare, messaging services and so on). Practically this can lead to backdoors being build in because if you don't cooperate, you can go to prison. (mother of god I am not using anything closed source anymore if possible).

So yeah, this is pretty much the reason why I am so privacy consious. This country is fucked.

WHAT THE FUCK
80usd for a multi device to-do application
A TO-DO APP

Got to learn Shopware (the eCommerce thingy written in PHP) for the job.

Bought a book worth ~60$.

The author writes: "Use vagrant it's soooooo comfy and cozy and everything!".

Sure, why not.

Got to get online over my smartphone.

Cloned the repo with the Vagrantfile.

Did a 'vagrant up'.

Downloaded the Ubuntu box of around 1.5 GB (reminder: over my smartphone which has around 3 GB 'highspeed' internet connection).

Vagrant initialized and provisioned the box.

Error.

Error?

Error.

VT-X is not enabled. Hm. Strange. Wait...when it's not enabled, can it be that...

Yep.

THIS SHITTY LAPTOP SCHMAPTOP DOES NOT SUPPORT VT-X AND I PULVERIZED JUST THE HALF OF MY INTERNET DATA FOR THIS SHITTY BOX IN ORDER TO JUST DOWNLOAD THE ZIP FILE AND INSTALL IT OLDSCHOOL-SCHMOLDSCHOOL INSTALL A APACHE VIRTUAL HOST.

Time for new hardware I think.

Friend: "Don't all computer science people learn multiple languages so they can use the right one for the job?"

My reply:
We learn multiple languages because some asshat before us had a hard-on for it and now we need to keep that shit running and we don't have time to rewrite it.

I make games, I don't do frontend fucking webdev; this isn't my fucking job and I don't fucking understand it. Fuck you, client with money. (Yes that is a CSS for beginners page, no I don't care. Screw you.)

the oscillation between the urge to do nothing and the urge to do everything

Do you dare me to do it?

I almost added a #TODON'T to my code today.

The biggest problem with computers is that they do what you tell them to do.
Not what you want them to do.

Today I gained thousand ++'s and got a dog... I left the dog home alone and
...

My company seems to never have the money to do something right but always have the money to do it twice.

Every job description out there:
" JUNIOR XY position.
Requirements: 50 years experience of Assembly, Java and Masonry, HTML, cloud based computing and artificial intelligence. Must be able to write algorithms like Hummingbird. Fluent in English, Mandarin and Latin. Must have five doctor and two Bachelor degrees. Experience in leading a Fortune 500 company benefitial.
Renumeration: 5 rice grains"

Google, you can't do that to me

YOU CANNOT DO THAT TO ME

I AM NOT A THING

Why do i have to support IE8 why do I have to support IE8 why do I have to support IE8 why do I have to support IE8 why do I have to support IE8 why do I have to support IE8 😞

Uninstalling devrant, devrantron and blocking the site in the router

Was so bored.. I actually started to do. what I was suppose to do.

Starting a new project be like

In my current work, I have two systems to work on (let's name em Systems A and B). Both basically do the same thing; both allow users to book facilities available to them.

System A is already in production. My job is to fix any bugs that come up on said system. System B is an improved version that they wanted me to develop. This would follow a different framework etc. I am already halfway through this system.

Now, here's the fucked up part. The code for system A is a massive clusterfuck. It has unused commented code dated back to ancient times where men had the brain of an ape.

And don't get me started on the fucking logic. One part of the code was to retrieve and display the timeslots available for a chosen facility. The code to do that alone takes up 500++ fucking lines, filled with ajax commands, html manipulation and commented, unused codes..AND THAT'S JUST THE FRONTEND!

The fucking backend was not a problem of smelly code anymore. Nope. It was like a programmer had code diarrhea and shat his backend code all over the project. If I had a pin board, I would have made a crazy wall just to understand what some fucknut was trying to achieve.

Anyway, my supervisor told me to fix some bugs on System A. Knowing how the code was, I told her that I could refactor the code. Since I've already achieved that function on System B, with a shorter and cleaner code, I could just copy that and use on System A. But nope. She SPECIFICALLY told me to just "do whatever to fix the bugs. I don't want to waste time on System A." Okay. Makes sense to me. Whatever. I didn't wanna fuck my head up looking through that mess of a cesspool. So, I came up with a few hacks, not thinking of clean code and fixed whatever bugs there was. I then just pushed to the repo (after testing of course).

This bloody morning, supervisor came in and gave me more bugs to fix. When I thought she was done, she said "Hey. I saw the fix you made to the system. The bugs are fixed but the retrieval of the timeslots is now pretty slow. Could you see what is the problem?"

Slow.. She said that it was slow. And asked if I could fix it. I already told her what the problem was and she did not want me to waste time on it. But she wants me to fix it. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG IN HER BLOODY HEAD! I SWEAR TO GOD... UGHHHHH I swear I was already waterboarding her in my head. YOU WANT FAST?? How bout fucking allowing me to refactor the code?? Fucking shit head. I think I should take up yoga.

Sometimes when people ask what I do for I living I say: talks to machines.
Thats what we do, we know the langauage to tell the machines what to do, how cool isnt that??

1: Open my IDE
2: Think about how much I have to do
3: Try to do it
4: Eventually switch to YouTube

I probably need to take a day off to do the things I need to do at work.

When they don't do the only thing what they are supposed to do...

So I started working at this IT company here in Oslo. Norway. After almost 6 months, I have almost not had anything to do, except little over just 1 month where I actually worked on a project, and now that is done. I have nothing to do, so today I applied for 11 jobs.

You know you have been using devrant too much when you open it and the algo only gives you rants that you already ++'ed.

The single most productive thing I've done today was teaching my colleague how to send GIFs over Slack...

What I hoped to do today: program
What my parents hoped to do today: go to the pool
What we are actually going to do today: go to the pool

ABSOLUTELY AWSOME

I just flashed BIOS on my server. I don't own a UPS, and i was only using 1 of the 2 PSU's since i couldn't find a second power cord.

Without a doubt the scariest 30 seconds I've ever experienced while working with IT

Why... What has freelancing come to

Who use to do this?
I use to do it
And u?

Password max length: 12 characters
Additional requirements: exactly 1 special character and exactly 2 numbers.

✔️ Every time you build a to-do list app, a puppy 🐕 dies 😢

The company I work at have never used Git or any other version control system...
Today I'm working on making everything ready for Git and removing "backup", backup_old", "fileX.php" etc.
In the end, I'll be happy and the company will be happy for the better management and control.

"The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. The bad news is that they do what you tell them to do."

- Ted Nelson

Client: "Help me I can't find my programs"
Me: "Have you installed them right?"
Client: "Yes, I have"

Basically I spent an hour explaining him that dragging an installer from the download folder to program folder isn't actually installing...

*about to push an experimental block of code*

my brain:
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it
don’t do it

Me: “git push -u origin master”

Woke up at 5am with the realization that I could use regular expressions to parse the string representation of regular expressions to build this program to parse regular expressions into more human-readable English.

I am so tired.

Tl;Dr: Client-side validated online test

Some stupid questions in an online test.
Not all of them were coding questions, but all (yes ALL) were client-side validated and to solve the tasks all I had to do was to copy one array into another and set the time I needed for that task to a legit number.

Well at least it was an online test that doesn't required 3hours.

One word; Procrastination. I've learnt how to do it and I've learnt how to do it well.

*Sigh

Every single one of us here loathe this question "Hey can you hack a Facebook account for me?"

Even worse when the one asking is your mom.
😶😶😶

(Backstory, she and her friend runs a store. Shit happened between them. The friend is the one who setup the store's Facebook page. Now posting shit on that page. She's not tech savvy. I can probably brute force her password. No 2FA)

Dilemma. Dilemma.

>.>
<.<

So today I worked with a drill (and actually managed to do what I intended). Where do I collect my trophy and "alpha male" certificate?
This is as far from software as I ever strayed...

Do you ever open devRant, read a little, and then exit the app to find something else to do. Then open the app immediately again, because that's what you do when you want something to do?

Dear Product Owners,

If you tell me how I need to architect my software again I'm going to ask you to provide a network topology of the architecture you want me to build.

I'll also need you to request the new servers, work with the ops teams to setup credentials, provision the NAT, register the domains and document the routes that the proxy will need to use.

then I'll need you to hook the repo up to our non-existent pipeline so that I can make sure I won't do all that testing I already can't do.

I hope you're paying attention, because that framework you told me I needed to use is going to be a pain to setup correctly.

after you're done with that, please attach any documentation you shit out to the ticket you never created.

Enragedly yours,
Looking for a new job

PS: get fucked

Trying to get an open source sponsorship be like

What the flying git did I just do.

So here I am, finishing my billionth.. ok maybe not that many, feels like it some days.. task so I do the following:

git add /path/to/file.ext
git commit -m "yay done for the day" /path/to/file.ext

- yes I specify the files in a commit, I've had bad days in the past, plus I can work on multiple files at a time -
But anyway...

Then all of a sudden 20 other files are now staged for commit 🧐🤪🤭😱🤯

Wtf!

Guess I'll be sorting this mess out before doing a push tomorrow morning.

I left for lunch early to drive five miles away to an abandoned parking lot so that I could cry about an email I received... this week has been fantastic.

Why God? Why do you do this to me?

So Microsoft removed the transparency Aero Glass effect going from Windows 7 to 10, to make 10 more "modern", even though 7 was pretty as fuck with that transparency.

Now they're bringing it back with their wanky "acrylic" blur?

Make up your mind Microsoft

TL;DR: If you make a contest where people get to vote online fucking make it right!

And here's the story: I play in a local coverband to make some cash on the side and because I love making music. We entered a contest hosted by a local radio-station. The first round was determined by judges and now 5 bands remain and of those 5 only 3 get to be voted into the final round. In the final round every bands wins something: 3rd place 250€, 2nd place 750€ and first place 5000€.
Now that stupid dipshit of a web-designer of that radio-station made a website where you can vote and it only fucking sets a cookie. You can delete it and vote again. You don't need no E-Mail and nothing. It doesn't even block multiple votes from one IP. It doesn't do shit.
Even my bandmates (who don't work in IT) where smart enough to figure out that you can just delete the cookies...
I think that now every band except for one is cheating. (we have over 5000 votes and combined all bands have like 4000 FB-Likes and sometimes and Band gets like 400 more votes in an hour) This is such a fucking messup and I don't know what to do. Maybe they'll look into stats but if they're so stupid to make a contest like this in the first place, maybe they won't. And even if they look into the stats it wouldn't be fair to kick out a band with much votes because how the fuck would they know if the band themselves cheated or if it was a fan of the band or even an enemy of the band just to get them kicked out.
I'm afraid of talking to the radio-station as a part of one band because maybe the web-designer there just gets frustrated and bans us from the contest entirely.
This is just fucking frustrating.

Wife and I went to visit her grandparents and when we were at the hotel she would watch lifetime and i would code.

As for Christmas, there's nothing else to do in this town so why not code.

"Crafted the wordpress way"

You mean, a huge pile of stinking shit?

Nothing like waking up to a text from a good friend, "do you know how to make phone apps?"

Sometimes the best thing to do is to rest during a weekend and do an activity away from software.

I was just waiting for it to happen. The gaslighting charade finally crumbles.

Tldr: was strongly asked to work overtime again for no reason, refused it (weakly, but it is a start).

(Boss isn't actually my boss, just my unofficial lead at the moment.)

1.4 hours after regular work hours:

Me: boss, this issue is still not resolved but I am out of ideas for it. Already shared my last resort idea twice with you but you don't agree to it. If you are available I can meet you for a short call before logging off for the weekend.

.
10 minutes later, just as I am about to log off.
.

Boss: let's meet. The problem implies something wrong with your code. Let's check.

Me: [ugh] okay

.
Boss then rambles on about a juvenile nsfw joke to describe the situation and I force a laugh, we get to the topic. I manage to explain the situation despite the interruptions from him. Then he shares his genius idea. We agree it might work but the implementation will be slightly tricky. It is now 2 hours outside of work hours.
.

Boss: can you try it out and let me know if it works?

Me: sure, I'll try it out on Monday and keep you posted.

Boss: Monday?!! Look, it is getting on my nerves now, this has been going on for too long (false, since the issue is from a day before not a week before and I had asked for help multiple times before today).
I don't even know what big boss is going to be like. This needs to be done.

Me:. ...
[ You manipulative asshole, I'm not doing overtime for you, I owe you nothing and don't give a shit about your senile nerves. Fuck you and your shit codebase and clusterfuck development environment which makes the hairballs in a public toilet look well engineered.]
Look, it is difficult for me too...

Boss: If not now, I can accept weekend. Because I don't know how big boss will take it. You understand right what I'm saying. This needs to be done.

Me: [Fuck off scum chod! Take your acceptance, fuck it hard, and take it away with you! ]
Hmm. Let's see what can be done.
Thanks for your help.

Logged off.

I can't express the tone of his righteous rage in words.
I have never had to face such revolting attitude before from people at work. I just don't get how people can be so ridiculous. The whole team is filled with chodebags of different sizes.

Fuck another headache! 2 hours translating C programs to Assembly on paper! 😧

Customer: "Yeah we need <insert bonkers 12 step circular logic> to find a thing(s) in the database."

Me: "Ok let me diagram this out and I'll send it to you to review.... but man this seems like the 8th version of this we're doing right?"

Customer: "Yeah well <employee Y> says they can't do B, C without this."

Me: "Wait... can't they just <insert the most simple step in the history of time> in step A, and then later on they won't have to do all this hunting later? Like you have that data at step A right?"

Customer: "Yeah but <employee Y> doesn't want to do that."

Me: "She's your direct report ....."

Customer: "Yes...."

Me: "Ok.... I'll send you the diagram and the cost estimate...."

Whatever reason sometimes it is a bit draining coding madness compared to making things actually efficient / people's jobs easier...

Just got AWS free subscription, had fun for 30 mins. Now I don't know what to do with it. Can someone give me idea for something to do with it.

It was then, after three hours of trying to get random tests to pass that she realized that when she refactored to make the function more verbose and to add comments, she had accidentally typed one `&` instead of two. And it took someone else looking at it to notice.

Words cannot express how frustrated I am with myself.

Should I tell him?

!rant Security training at work comes in the form of a serialized TV show where each episode concerns some security topic kind of tangentially and ends with a “REMEMBER… “ followed by the lesson you were supposed to get from the episode.

I kind of love it. A lot. I actually look forward to security training, and I’m not the only one. They stagger the release so you can’t binge watch all the seasons at once and you get three episodes at a time. 😂

On chat today.
Dude: can you run a script for me? We don't have permission.
Me: what kind of script? Who wrote it?
Dude: posts screenshot of DML select/update statement he tried to run.
Me: I'm a DBA. We don't run DML for people.
Dude: Oh. Can you give me the password?
Me: examine script and notice he tried to run it on QA DB.
Me: No. We don't memorize passwords, and this is QA; you need to check the password out of the safe. You also need a change ticket to DevOps, and they will run it for you.

At that point I ended the discussion, because running anything in QA or Prod without a change ticket gets you fired. And I like my job. Really annoyed.

Why the fuck does Apple hate developers so much? I just want to test and play around a bit. Why do I have to own a fucking Mac? Why do I need to pay 99$ a year just to install a debug build on my own device?! It's literally impossible to get into ios development without being rich or having some kind of plan for revenue...

Testing my app on Android:
Install Android studio -> plug in phone -> run code in Android Studio or simply install the resulting apk on your phone.

Trying to test my app on my iPad:
Google how to build app for iPad -> reading that you have to own a Mac to run xcode when you want to build Code for iOS -> searching for a workaround -> find a way to build my app online -> setting the tool and building it -> Trying out 5 different tools to sideload the app, no one works -> finding out that you need a developer account to sign the app for testing purposes on MY OWN DEVICE. I really would appreciate it if I would be able to install personal stuff for testing and LEARNING without being forced into insolvency. Why are people putting up with this kind of bullshit?

I'm thinking about buying a Mac

Giant, month-and-a-half-long-ticket.
After learning six or so complicated areas of the system and updating them all to work with the new changes, make them all play nicely, etc. I finally got everything working. 95% spec coverage, though no ui tests because I haven't gotten selenium working. whatever, everything's done and works.

Second dev bases her ticket off of mine and continues working. Work elsewhere continues and there's an official release, so we both merge in master. I run tests, everything passes, and go back to working on other tickets.

She finishes her ticket.
We do end-to-end testing, and everything works perfectly. Time for a demo!

She merges in master again, and pushes her branch to two staging servers. (idk why two.)

Demo starts.
We connect to the staging servers, and... none of the UI changes exist; they aren't running the correct code!

So she runs it locally for a demo instead. Two features in my ticket no longer work. She throws me under the bus. She throws me under the bus again by criticising a rake task I scrapped because she wanted to do it. Then again because I didn't update my branch to master and push it before the demo, despite having no reason to. and despite the demo being of her branch.

Then she continues to show off and brag about how she's like the "legend" (senior dev) she envies. QAbuys it.

I'm having an emotion, and it's called anger.

Is common decency too much to expect?

If you give someone a job in the company you work for, do you expect them to badmouth you? Or to try to humiliate you? Why do people do this?

One day i type hello world program.
And i was amazed that for the first time someone (something) is doing what i tell it to do.
And that's how i got interest in programming.

Lilo & Switch

So when does it get less annoying when someone assumes that you play video games every day just because you spend until late night programming?

Good evening DevRant!

Any ideas on what can I do with my spare Raspberry Pi 3?

Thanks!

Dude, publish your damn dataset with your damn ML study!!!! I'm not even asking for your Godforsaken model!
😡😡🗡️🗡️⚔️🔫🔫🏹🔨

I am feeling useless. :/

Got a mini project assignment in college. We decided to make a game using Unity that recgonizes sign language gestures from Leap Motion.

I asked my colleague to make the function to compare the hand gesture, and I'll do the rest of the game. One more friend does the documentations and reports.

Three weeks passed, asked for the code but he said he hasn't finished it yet. I told him to ask me if he has any problems with it.

He sent me this 24 hrs before the deadline.
Me and my other friend died on the spot.
I screamed at him the whole night on the phone call whilsth trying to do his part in just 3 hours...

Needless to say, we didn't finish the project on time.

I'm so tired yo... I'm on 2 startups, one is mine the other some dude I'm working with. Both sites built in PHP. Another side gig slack bot thing in Node JS. And then 2 day time jobs in which I'm deciding which one to quit out of... 🫠😵💀

Does anyone else suffer from a lack of direction at work? It really kills motivation and velocity

Heads up: if you process a big database and want to do some advanced calculations, do not, i repeat, do not attempt to do so on your pentium home pc.

I was inspired by ADL to show off my first rice. Need to write some conky scripts to make it a little more interesting on the desktop.

Using i3 as the WM, with more or less vanilla i3status. Thinking of switching over to polybar at some point possibly. I used oomox to make my own theme, so nemo, firefox, and all other system applications are matching. Check her out!

You know you are going down a dark rabbit hole when you are thinking about buying the 2019 iPod just so you have an iOS dev device...

(Finding a used iPhone in Australia for less or equal to $300 is just not a possibility)

Long time no rant from me. Sorry guys, has been a tough time for me.

Little background: I'm an apprentice and as such definitely not a fully trained professional. I'm working in a big company with people who have very let's say interesting ideas what I should be able to do.

This whole disaster begins shortly after I started my apprenticeship. I was offered to choose my first little project. "Something from the backlog, not very challenging and a nice beginner one. It's just about a PoC" ok, le me thinks. I choose to make a weather display.
Basic functionality was provided within the next 3 weeks. My direct boss (let's call him Jo) liked it and talked to his boss (Hugo) about it. Hugo was so excited he called our product manager to get my plugin into our software asap and began to think about where else we could use this.
This is where shit went downhill. Hugo told me it was my task to implement it on a totally different platform and to "host it in azure". I don't know much about azure and I never used it. I told him that I'd need time and some kind of sandbox to try and learn how things work. He promised but nothing ever came through. Not even Jo could do something about this.
They told me I should write this asap because "every customer would LOOOOVE this" and I honestly can't think of a way to meet all their requirements without access to our azure system/ sandbox. (There are a lot of requirements)
Am I wrong? Should I be able to do this? I'm a fucking trainee. I don't know everything.

After months I finally received an email from the external partner's support team!

```
Please be informed that we consider your Incident "XXX: How to Y?" as closed with status: Closed.
```

Why thank you.

Fucking asshats, don't understand difference between people who do what..

Fucking asshat wants me to edit this image to his preference, I'd happily do it if I knew it how to...but noooooo he wants to convince me that I can do it without even knowing what or how to do...

That's like asking a plumber to fix my car...

- Do this
- ok.

DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!1!!

anyone ever had a relative download a virus and when confronted about it they say no? even though you specifically told them not to open weird looking emails.

well, pops apparently did NOT open a ransomware email 😂 Baby, bye, bye, bye... to all the files

The amounts of confusion, shame, and sweat after an interview is devastating...

Leo Moracchioli
Coffee
Intellij IDEA Ultimate (Distraction free mode)

Stepping into heaven ...

The whole email and DNS system is fucked up!

Just got a free Raspberry Pi 3 B+ when I bought another. So I have one without a purpose. Any cool ideias?

Got my program hooked up to an external sql database that’s ready to be fed into by PHP, hosted on an SSL website, fixed up all the other bugs with TONS of other stuff.

4:23 A.M. and feelin’ good.

Me: Why are we spending time building reports for Support? AFAIK they never read or use them.

Boss: Seems they expect you to do it.

Me: Then what exactly are they supposed to be doing? All the issues seem to just escalate back to us.... We should just make sure issues never get into PROD

Boss: I agree, they're always firefighting... we gave them more funding so eventually they should catch up **Me: I highly doubt it, you should just stop hiring monkeys** esp. if we prevent PROD issues.

Me: Yea... we should prevent production issues because someone always has to pay off the (technical) debt and interest rates in PROD are very high

Guys. GUYS. There are so many freaking weird edge cases for regular expression evaluation. *head desk*

"So do you want me to do {thing} OR {mutually exclusive thing}?"

"Yes."

Well. Fuck.

A sunny monday morning. The sun almost glimpsing over the horizon. I'm on my way to the office, taking a breath of fresh cool air. It is infused by the scent of sweet pastries.

I reach the office, but something is different. Why is the door slightly opened? Carefully I grab the door handle. I do my first step past the doorframe and wooosch. Thick and sticky stuff is running done my spine, finding it's way through my clothes. I feel so un-fucking-believably dirty in this very moment.

This should give you an impression how I felt when I had to change a DNS record in this completely broken setup for just a matter of seconds until the letsencrypt client renewed the certificate.

I'm feeling seriously dirty.

Got a new excuse for slacking off... DNS propagation... eurghhh

Me: DMs coworkers that appear online after their working hours to check on them and make sure they’re not feeling like they’re obligated to work more/encouraging them to take time for themselves

Also me: Can’t sleep at 4am, so immediately start trying to chase down the genesis of an error someone complained about

Hello !

I'm a fresh school dropout (against my will) without any diploma. I've learned programming from self teaching since three years; mostly doing web and apps development with golang, and c#.

I've already done some small projects, helped a lot of people with code, do some freelance and I'm now trying to build a SAAS.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, I'm completely lost for my future. What would you do if you were in this situation ?

Go to hell
Go directly to hell a bit early
Do not pass go
Do not collect 200 dollars

Adventures with house IT

I'm currently experimenting with PowerShell but my scripts won't run even though I've got every local permission. The error message indicates it's a GPO problem.
"No problem" le me thinks and calls IT hotline.
After 2 incompetent and unprofessional technicians i've still got no solution. I'm waiting for the second tech to call back because he "needed some time to get to know PowerShell" (he is a trained and certified SysAdmin).
During my call he couldn't decide if it was a GPO problem or not.
And this is just one story of their incompetence...

So today is going to be fun, need to do some work on my game and book with a hangover... Why do I do this to myself!

What in the planet do they expect me to do?

!dev
This thing is eating away at me so just shut up and listen.

I have started applying for this uni for PhD (don't judge me) and for that, I will need recommendation letters, right? So I emailed two of the people who have already agreed to write me recommendation letters, to confirm the details that I'll give the said uni to contact them. Emails were sent out on Thursday. It's now soon to be Tuesday and I haven't heard a thing back. And this is abso-fucking-lutely killing me!!!! (There's still another to be emailed but he's a bit high and mighty and I'll email him after I get feedbacks from these two about my motivation letter and CV.)

Like, when you know my whole future depends on a single email of yours, saying that I'm a good PhD candidate (and oh boy, that is a joke; considering that I'm applying for literally one of the best unis in this particular subject in the whole world... I'm well over my head, aren't I?) why would you keep me standing on one leg just to confirm your contact details? I mean I know I'm overreacting a bit considering the deadline is yonks away, but still, urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

When you realize it's 2 o'clock at night and you're still working on a project for a job.

Alrighty, saturday morning rant time!

I just recieved a mail from one of my not-so-much-loved colleagues.

Now Background first: I work in IT-Support. We provide services for other companies. One of those services is monitoring servers and clients for various things. I recently took over the project (was assigned to do it) and restructured everything, wrote new scripts to test more stuff, successfully tested it internally and rolled it out over the last 2 weeks.

Now one of these scripts hooks into the Windows Update API and looks at the update history. It filters for known Windows Update Agent strings (UpdateOrchestrator, AutomaticUpdates and AutomaticUpdatesWuApp in case you also want to do something like this) and then looks for installation errors over the last 24 hours and wherever there have even been any successful updates over the last one and a half months.

Back to that mail.

My colleague sent me this lovely mail about a ticket i opened about his customers servers beeing all out-of-date on updates.

"This is all wrong, everything's fine. I disabled the checks."

...

It's on bitch.

So i logged on to my work PC via TeamViewer, opened my script, connected to the customer and was ready to debug the shit out of my script, knowing i probably won't even need to.

I looked at the update history via Windows Update itself and behold: 1st April. That's almost 50 days in the past.

So the script works, go figure.

Great, so search for new Updates then.
>None found.

Hm. What could it be? Did my super special colleague forget to care about his very special totally-needs-WSUS-customer WSUS again?

Yup.

Online-Search finds a ton of new Updates.

Screenshot, write pissed mail to colleague, re-enable checks, breakfast.

So what do you guys do when you have to work on a project but you are really bored to do anything at all?

Frist time poster & 22 y.o. junior dev here.
I just wanted to get advice in which direction I should start my career.
I just finished my education last year as a Software Engineer and am now undecided if I should more go into Front- ore Backend.
I‘m currently doing mostly Python as a allrounder but am really intrested in React.
Is there a big difference in sallary (if that maters, I‘m from switzerland) or career oportunitys? How do I figure out the correct way I should go?
Thanks you so much for your help!

Me: *Working peacefully*

One hour later:
*Meeting starts*
...
*Meeting ends*
...
*Action items are sent*
...
My Anxiety: 📈

Life sucks when you get an error which you have seen this error like plenty of times and when you start debugging it and run out of all the ways you have always followed to fix it and all those didn't fixed the problem.
With nothing left now to approach, wondering what may have gone wrong.
The fundamentals are shattered
...

Since there is Scrum i am programmer , tester , software engineer , networking guy and application manager. Thank you Scrum didnt know that before. And i have no idea what i am doing right now ....

Learning Vue.js and it's awesome...

Making To-do list.📜📜

Any suggestions👻?

!rant
After a long time, finally I got an opportunity to participate in a Machine Learning competition.

Brushing up my memory.
And also teamed up with another colleague.
Hope, we both get to learn a lot even if we don't win.

If you want to be a dev, don't buy a house. Or if you do buy a house don't do DIY. Or if you do the DIY, do it badly so you don't have to do it again.

I enjoy helping people but jez, just learn to read. Why do I need to explain to 15 people what to do, when there's a document with simple instructions to follow ?
How the fuck do you think I do ? I am not a genius, you are just dumb

Im learning Advanced Computing in a institute. Prior to that I have done many projects with Unity 3D, MEAN and C#. But guy who is teaching is very rude every time to the class. 'you people are stupid' 'you cant do anything on your own' 'that's why your here'. And Im self tought programer so Im getting really angry at such comments. How to deal with this?? 😥😫

jesus h christ why do you do this to me

What do you people love to do in your leisure time?

Best: I have no work to do
Worst: I have no idea what to do with myself now

Yahoo finance shut down all their historic data uRL and im out of options. No API or packeges works. I have a report to pass up on tuesday for my ViVa and this is shit. Fuck. My months of work just wasted.

Java, or: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome the programming language.

Here I sit all alone came to code but only found git corrupted object 😞

Hey guys and girls,

follow up rant on my apprenticeship situation. I talked to Jo (my trainer). I told him I need more supervision and either someone who teaches me the stuff I need to know to meet the requirements from Hugo (my department mananger) or some further education. Because otherwise I'm not able to write producion ready code. (Keep in mind: I'm a fucking trainee who started their apprenticeship 6 months ago!)
Jo is more than happy to help me and make sure I'll get everything i need. Sadly he has to speak with Hugo and get his ok.
Hugo thinks 2 das of school/week is enough training. (Regardless of the fact that we don't even learn the same languages there we use in our projects.) I told him that way I won't be able to finish my projects.
I hope he reconsiders. How should I learn if nobody's there to teach me? (My collegues are to occupied fixing bugs and implementing new features/ don't know the languages either.)

If Hugo keeps this mindset I have to contact the IHK (a german institution which keeps an eye on apprenticeships).

How the fuck do you do a performance review?

For me, we need to do self assessments.

Part of it is what I do well, part of it is what i need to improve.

No idea what to put, since I feel like I'm awful at everything lol.

Just lost hours of work because the winforms designer decided to send half my elements to (11, -8000) and resize others to (0,0). No matter what I did, there was no moving them back. And every change I made was reverted by some unknown mechanism.

Thankfully, I still have the user controls I built. But I still have to rewire 3k lines worth of form events.

After writing ~200 lines of code and then unit testing it

THE TESTS ALL PASS!!!

then I run them again just to be sure and they all pass but mocha is saying I am getting 40ms lag on some of my tests...

Noooo!!!

This is meant to be an async message passing system; I cannot have an input lag of 40ms :(

!rant

What is something I can complete in a week (let's say 30-40 hours) as a newbie (I made an android app, played around with engines like unity and unreal here and there, tried some c#, and I always mess around with the linux command line, my RPi, etc etc)? I'll start working in a dual-studying job ('applied CS') in 2 weeks so I'll have enough learning-without-doing to do. I just want to learn something by doing something useful (e.g. a small android app that I can put ads in or sell, or maybe provide something for free that people like. I don't want to write my own engine( that'd take very long anyways) or make a compiler because I feel that'd be kind of useless and even though it'd probably be fun, I would lack initiative.

Been working on a small collab with my 3 mates
It's just one guy who's doing all the heavy lifting
I chime in with a 3-4 line modification every day or so
The other two are afk
It's chugging along just fine..
I feel like a garbage can in front of this guy's coding ability

Leason, never code when hungary. Eat Pizza first. 🍕

Has any of you reached a point that you want to resign from work because of a client?

We are dealing with a client at work that uses the app for prototyping instead of making designers create wireframe, imagine the amount of code to write,edit, remove, write it again and yet there is always something isn't right from the client point of view.

What is even worse backend guys screw the server and I am the one to be blamed for errors: 5xx
I even get blamed for error 400 (bad request) when that request passes tests but out of a sudden server returns 400, when you hit refresh the exact same moment of error and server decides to return data and stop throwing error 400.

I also get blamed for server fails to return data from a search endpoint, and if server throws 403 for a public endpoint.

This isn't a rant or getting out of my system but I need opinions, I've been working on this project for a year, with complete mess from either client or backend team, if any of you is instead of me, what would you do?

I'm not a complete guy either, but that situation is just beyond my abilities to handle.

We basically don't unit test at work. I write some tests for my code and honest to God people complain I'm wasting time saying a test bed and manual tests are good enough. We don't write test beds for about half of our production code and rely on integration tests for the rest. We only test release builds which have been symbol stripped, I get handed a crash report with no stack trace that I'm unable to reproduce and expected to stay late to fix it for some arbitrary internal deadline.

I've since moved to R&D where basically I'm left to do my own thing so it's better.

We don't project manage. Project leads take time estimates and double them so management might cut them some slack. This doesn't matter because management made up time estimates before the project started. Last project I was on had a timeline of 3 months and took a year.

We have released broken products. Not that any of the above really matters, our software products have made about 50k revenue in 2 years. There are 6 people on software. Fortunately hardware has made about 3 mill. That said our hardware customers are getting frustrated with us as we keep fucking up, shipping broken products and missing deadlines.

I've been working there about a year and a half and will be looking for a job at the end of the current project.

I joined devRant about when I was most pissed off with my job, my rant frequency has definitely gone down since I moved over to R&D.

So... I'm a DevOps engineer and I received an email from boss today wanting me to do "tech Ops" for next few months, basically tech support because they are having a shortage and too much tickets that they can't handle. *Palmface*

Is it legal to destroy other company's site or app. because they didn't pay your money in the past?
and also app they created is not secure.
The company is in another country.
.
.
.
If "No"
I'll still do that. I don't care.

!rant

I went out tonight. Before I knew it, all the songs being played were far beyond my youth, and I'm now sitting outside smoking cigarettes. Is this normal adulthood?

Tell me you don't want to do technical support without telling me you don't want to do technical support

Dual-booted Gaming Computer: A Saga of Frustration, Alcoholism*, and Relief

So a while back my gaming computer was booting Antergos Linux and Windows 10. It took me a few months, but I finally became fed up with Windows 10's bullshit of putting ads in the OS (Suggested Apps, OneDrive, etc.) and reinstating all of their defaults after an upgrade (Edge, privacy settings, the People Button in 1709).

So, I backed up my data and installed Windows 7. Windows 7 has a bright, consistent look, and in my opinion still holds up as a good operating system.

However, I couldn't boot into Antergos after that. For whatever reason, no matter how hard I tried, I just wasn't able to. So, I decided to reinstall. Might as well, anyway.

Now, I have an nVidia card, which does not play well with the OSS drivers, so it's basically normal for me to have to unplug my card and use the on-board graphics. So I do that and boot into the LiveUSB, do the install, boot into the desktop, install the nVidia drivers package, shut down.

I reinstall the card, turn the computer on... and nothing. Just a black screen with a flashing underline. I can't even get into a TTY session.

I ended up trying a few other distributions--Gecko Linux, Arch Labs, Manjaro--but all had the same issue. I was about to give up, but decided to try Antergos one more time, but with the newest install media.

And it worked! I was so freaking happy! I can finally play my Linux games again!

Reminder to do that thing you needed to do before/after work.

what do you want to do in 5 years?

joined blind today...

i don't see smart engineers...

all i see is a bunch of scared sheep blathering around and complaining and wondering why a job in a capitalist society isn't 100% secure all the time...

get off leet code for once and read a damn history book

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

The joy of having to interrupt your current task to go to a hairdresser appointment...

Kinda feels like giving up playing just to go to do your taxes

I recently found an old friend to help my debugging — I don't have a duck, but for some reason people see them as unserious and think the ones I've got are either cute, quirky, or a natural part of the nerd habitat :P

When you would just check the school timetable for tomorrow, but when you unlock your phone you find devrant to be the active app, and you just scroll through everything, and forget why did you even unlock your phone...

Just devrant things...

So I have a question regarding what I should learn next. I am going to my 3rd year in college and you can say that I am sort of baby MERN stack developer. Baby because I don't have a lot of production/real world experience. Now I need to decide whether I want to continue to work with JS in web dev. Or should I go to some other language for web dev like . NET or python. Or should I start learning GraphQL, or Machine learning. I am quite interested in blockchain and devops also, but I need to make a decision and please give me advice as to what you think will help me in the future.
I know I am all over the place but that is literally my brain since last few weeks.
Thanks in advance, I'll do a ++ as a form of my thanks.

!dev?

It's getting cold now over here and all I want to do is sleep... I have no motivation to do anything useful (dev, useful reading) either, just binge watch TV...

So wondering how do you actually get shit done (stuff you should do but don't have to do)? Maybe it's the food related as well?

When starting a new project full of challenges, do not go to your technicians right away; go to your artists first - they will know what to do. Then go to your engineers - because they will figure out how to do it.

Started taking an Angular 5 tutorial to see how things were going in the world of Angular JS. I got to say, I am impressed. It makes me think of React in a lot of ways, but with a heavy emphasis on separation of concerns. Particularly suited for those that do not like to mix views with logic. I am liking it and going at it with an open mind although React is still my preferred option. One thing that irritates me is the ammount of "plz sir, can you give code for <insert complex and heavy app that people just do not give for free>".....so annoying.

On another note, I like how Angular brings in the concept of di among other things to the table, what I am trying to get is the feeling of writing 2 apps, there is one thing to have MVC on the background, the other is to have it in the frontend! Oh well, Angular (first edition) was fun and I know it decently well, time to get cracking on more code!!

Power outage at work.... what to do what to do.

Keeping the clients happy is very important but when you have alot of shit to do, being a glorified helpdesk bugs me the fuck out. My inbox is screaming at me: "Please no more... Master please end me!".

So, a few days ago I went on an interview for a position as a web developer, and during the interview they tell me they are thinking about getting into hosting, and that if they decide to do so I would be the one responsible for managing all of it.

I have no idea how to set up web servers, let alone make sure they can handle heavy loads and so on, so I'd be taking on a huge responsibility and workload, along with the task of making websites.

The company consists of 5 designers, and at the moment, no developers, and they have about 30-40 customers, all with sites that would need to be moved to the new hosting platform.

My question to you all is this:

How much does quality hosting equipment cost, and is it really worth it for such a small company to get into hosting, or should they rather look to make a deal with an existing host for some kind of monthly kickback/rebate?

I'm thinking they should find an existing host and enter some kind of partnership, as that would be easier and safer than doing all the hosting inhouse.

What do you guys and girls think?

Junior front end developer.

Interest in saas, js and jQuery,
1 year html5 and JavaScript, knowledge of image authoring (Photoshop)

Job is wordpress customisation.

18k... Degree in media required.

So you want a graphic designer for junior developer wage.. lol.

I lost all motivation to code today and I don’t know what to do now

Hello.
I am a student of Computer Science Engineering (Bachelor of Technology). I am 3 years into this 4-year course. I am strong in Data structures and Algorithms, and passionate to add more stuff to this list.

I am really done with this University coursework, and want to explore more (specifically, want to do something that is practical, and matters). I, obviously cannot leave the Uni, but I want to make my time at home more productive. Not just to me, but everyone.

But:
1. I don't know where to start.
2. I teach myself everything, and hence, there is much difference between what I know and what people need, and I'm kind of scared of ruining/wasting other's time.

If there is someone out here who has the time out of his/her busy schedule to guide and set me on a path, please do help me. It's getting weird in my head.

Languages I know: C(took a 1-year course), Python, JavaScript [learning JAVA], Oracle, Visual Basic

Things I have done before:
* Developed a fullstack website for Indian Railways (going live in May 2019) [used Python for back end]

I have a sincere need from within to do this, and I am going to learn whatever more I need to, in order to fulfill your requirements. Please just show me WHAT and from WHERE.

Kindly do get back.

I'm just joining this field, and already I hate it when family ask what exactly I'm learning.
I can either dumb it down to the old "I make computer go beep beep" and get met with accusations of rudeness, tell the full details and have them look lost, or try and dumb it down and get met with patronizing remarks ("Oh yeah, I remember doing that last Thrusday! Sure, yeah!).
How do you explain this shit to your folks?

For everyone who is having a busy week, just remember the few moments you get with an empty to do folder

Javascript I'm trying to love you I really do.

But what did Webpack do to my named capture groups?

Spent all morning debugging legacy code that I need to migrate.

Most of the time is just waiting for it to load --pieces of data-- entire tables from the database and then filter out the records it doesn't want using some app logic.

WHAT SORT OF MONKEY WRITES CODE LIKE THIS? HOW WAS THIS EVEN ALLOWED INTO PRODUCTION...

I have to open Notepad to write down my chain of thoughts, steps, and things to check once the next breakpoints are hit so that I don't forget them.

So in theory I'm being paid all morning to sit around and do nothing.

That sounds great but I'm falling asleep... Shoulda worked from home...

What was I saying again...yea...

DON'T HIRE MONKEYS!!! THEY WRITE SHIT CODE THAT WASTES EVERYONE'S TIME EVEN AFTER THEY LEAVE...

I'm going to lunch now... Hopefully Notepad has enough into for me to remember what I was doing...

"How do you do an NSLOOKUP?" Random developer today.... seriously, you've been a developer for two decades, and you don't know how to do an NSLOOKUP? Or at least how to Google to do an NSLOOKUP?

"Ok, now I know what todo with a, b and c but what to do with d?"

"You re-tar d."

I'm not sure what to answer...
Found on SlimSocial for Facebook - Windows 10 Mobile (latest update😜)

When you’ve got so many things to do it just kills your motivation to do any of them.

I was on a PHP conference once.
You know what? They really think all that is ok...

Our company got bought over from a global private entity 3 months back (advent international) and the reciew process started and it turns out, im part of the bunch that may be getting retrenched as per the meeting we just had, our positions being redundant and just last week had a over the top performance review.. Now i need to figure out what to tell the family when i get home. This Fucking sucks im not going to lie

"RAID isn't backup"
"RAID is super not backup"
"Don't do RAID, do backups"

B-But I want to do backups... to a backup nas using RAID. No good?

I've got a question for everyone.

I'm revamping my CV and I was thinking of lightening it a bit, but I'm not very experienced with CV's.

At my last development job, we would order breakfast cobs every Friday, and I would sort all the change out and order it etc.

Would it be wrong to add this to the end of my job history?

To the DevOps here, what do you normally do in your job?

Holy fuck! So many custom roms!

Hey, first time poster :-)

Working alone on a C++ app that has to control a GUI, camera and electronics on the side... but between the test cases, switching between classes and helping colleagues on unrelated issues, I find it hard to keep track of what connects with what, what needs to be done, what IS done...

So, how do you guys and girls keep track of your projects ? Stuck with To-do lists for now ^^

Age 20-25: Don't tell me what to do!!
Age > 25: Please tell me what to do.

What should I do with a guy, who rejected help, promised to do the work and just didn't even try to do it?

EasyJet! Why do you do this to me?!

What you guys do at work when you are not busy (at all)?

It feels so great to check a box from your to-do list... even if it's as little as creating the project file.

Nobody cares about stickers on your laptop

It's a great start of the week when your general manager asks you to get in to touch with a guy to ask about their return merchandise authorization system. And when I reply, sure, what would you like me to accomplish. You get the reply, I don't know, don't bother me with the technical details, they told me it should be super easy.

I don't know what 'it' is, but I'm happy that the man who can hardly use his macbook says its super easy.

How do you do to get going quickly again after leaving code unfinished? To-do comments? Separate notes? Something else?

!rant

I've got a question for everyone as we are all in the same realm. How do you handle working for a company who provides no motivation, very little challenges, horrible pay, incompetent developers, and completely useless management?

Also, no other opportunities in the area. Literally. So, "change companies" wouldn't really be a viable option.

Install React Native on Windows machine with android usb debugging is so hard...

I feel depressed and anxious, what do y’all do to feel better?

Where do you go/do to rant about life?

Let all the rage out... That's not related to dev...