Best story ever

This really happened to me yesterday at work.

Me: *walks into office*
Coworker: Hey Will, I got a question for you
Me: I...[read more]

When you install a program and you realize just beat a world record.

Got a phone call: I got an error, what do I do?
Me: what kind of error?
Her: I closed it.
Me: what did it say?
Her: I don't know, it was a window with "ok" and "cancel"
Me: why didn't you read it?
Her: I don't understand this computer language.

/me dies a little inside.
There is nothing quite as stupid as people who refuse to read their own language as soon as it appears on a screen.
They make those things for a reason.
This happens too often.

I noticed that urban dictionary didn't have a definition for devRant.

So I posted one.

And it got rejected ):

*Bawls like a baby*

To the four people who will read this, if you're remotely close to being interested, let me know, I'll post it here.

"there's a problem with your API"
Me: "why?"
"I get no data"
Me: "what response code are you getting?"
"405 - Method not allowed. But only on the /version endpoint"
Me: "Soo... What request are you sending?"
"POST"

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SEND A POST REQUEST TO AN ENDPOINT THAT **GETS** THE VERSION OF MY API???!!!!

Me: "Read the documentation. It's there for a reason"

She - So. Do you read ?

Me - Yes. Infact a lot. Daily. My life is filled with it.

She - Wow. Nice. So what do you read mostly ? Which one is your favourite

Me - Mostly Documentations. Vuejs documentation is my favourite followed by express and mongodb documentation. And yeah webpack. You should read them too. Then there is a book on ES6, 'Understanding ES6' by Nikolas S Zakas, famous author and programmer. Great stuff

"My think isn't working!"
"Let me see."
*starts program, error message appears, clicks X*
"What was that?"
"Don't know, appears every time, I never read it."

Account guy saw me coding...

account guy: so you type a lot.. how can you remember so much??

me: ??

account guy: I mean there is NO LOGIC in what you do, so you must read these things and type them here... you need to remember a lot.. right??

me: ohh... that... well.. I have very good memory :)

p.s. last line was sarcasm

Who said I can't read my own code after 2 months?
*Opens code*
.
.
.
.
.
*Cries in a corner*
*The world hates me*

Am I the only one who learns more on my own than at university? It really annoys me when I come here to study but all I do is read devRant posts all day, they are good tho.

##Real fuckening STORY##
Angry client: this feature is not working like we discussed !

Me: it is.. *giving some explanation*

Client : no, this is not the right way

Me: But this is what we documented while gathering requirements, and YOU signed in the documentation..

Client : that long document? you don't expect me to read all of that talk just for this simple feature..

Me inside: *killing him 5 times in 5 different ways

Me: Finally, thanksgiving break. I can't wait to go 127.0.0.1 and read books all week.

Friend: Wait, so you found a phone number in a book? Dude, let's call it!

Me: ...

I'd love to have a friend at school who would understand my references but that's pretty much imposible.

Does your article require me to click "next page" 8 times to read the whole article?
if yes, then fuck you.

Client(On Call): I emailed some query a day before. I got a response too. But, i am not able to find answer of my specific query.

Me: Let me check that for you. Yes, it is there. See the mail carefully.

Client: No. It's not there.

Me: Can you read the whole mail for me?

Client: Sure. *Started Reading* Oh yes. Yes. it is here. *Hangs up the Phone.*

Me: Sigh.

Working with a new dev several years ago -

Him: "Man, I don't get why everybody thinks coding is hard. It's easy!"

Me: "It gets tougher, the more you read the more you realize you know less than you think."

Him: "I'm done reading! I did all of my reading in college."

Me: thinking "have a nice career"

Want me to NOT read your fucking article?

'Cause that's how you get me to NOT read your fucking article

(referring to the website creators, not the writer)

!Rant
Senior dev from another team comes up to me:
"you alright? Looks like you're struggling with something. Want me to give you a hand?"

And my personal favourite:
"feel free to slack me whenever you need help. Don't be afraid to ask questions. Only way to learn is to ask"

He also recommended me some books and resources to read.

I left work today motivated af!

Me telling a senior dev on how to install a proprietary software:

Me: Sir, the instructions are in the readme.txt

Senior: I'm supposed to read the readme?!

To all the C++ programmers who haven't read "Modern C++ Design" by Andrei Alexandrescu yet, READ IT! Its great. To me, it opened up an entirely new approach to designing classes with a whole new dimension of possibilities. And it reads really well! Sometimes I got shivers because the code was so sexy 😅😂😂

I’m sorry I didn’t read your marketing email within 2 minutes of getting it. Please forgive me.

I was drinking my tea when I read this. Now it's all over my screen. xD

Thank you for making me laugh, James, whoever you are.

One of my friend at college asked me why her computer is running slow even when she is running only chrome.

Me: how much memory does it have?
Her: 1TB.
Me (somewhat confused): no no I meant RAM.
Her: yeah yeah it's one TB. I read the specifications of the laptop.
Me: *in my mind, fucking read it again* please read it again. You must have misread it.
Her( grinning face ): alright.

Guess who didn't talk to me for a week. 😂

So my CEO wants me to move to architecting systems!!!!!!!! My dream since a kid !!!

It seems like a mad job where you're a crazy scientist 😂
What should I read or do to be better ?

Other people when they read SO:
________________
( Significant other )
————————— o
º
º

Me when I read SO:
_______________
( Stack overflow )
———————— o
º
º

!rant

Just read a DevRant comment and it made me laugh out loud. Looked at the user and it turned out to be an old comment of mine. Looked at the upvotes ... at least I think I'm funny. 😂

Full stack web dev has no idea what an ssh key is. He is telling me that he can't read the key file, it would be kind of me if I could send him a .txt file instead.

Fuck me man...

Usually I do love my colleagues, but lately....

FOR FUCKS SAKE I AM NOT YOUR WALKING HUMAN GOOGLE SEARCH ENGINE SHITOVERFLOW CHATGEPETTO INSTANCE! READ YOUR FUCKING LOGS, DO A FUCKING INFORMATION LOOKUP, READ THE FUCKING MANUAL.

OH YOU HAVE A QUESTION YOU SAY? PLEASE FOR FUCK SAKE ELABORATE WITH SOMETHING MORE THEN 'Please help me with the pipeline"' WHILE YOUR ACTUAL PROBLEM IS A LACK OF KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING OF GIT, LINUX OPERATING SYSTEMS AND AUTOMATION.

OH YOUR BRANCH IS, WHAT, 3 MONTHS BEHIND MASTER? NEVER HEARD OF A FUCKING REBASE? WHATS THAT YOU SAY??? YOU DONT KNOW WHEN TO SKIP A COMMIT??? ITS YOUR FUCKING CODEBASE! READ THE FUCKING DOCUMENTATION !!!

WHATS THAT? YOU WORK IN VSCODE AND YOU DO T K OW HOW? AGAIN READ THE FUCKING DOCUMENTATION !

Self.end(rant)

I had enough of these "Recruiters" bugging me and decided to reply

Fucking take a minute read the god-damn description of the profile to see if they have those skills mentioned at-least

:-)
I think that "family guy" is telling me That is time to close netflix and read something......

First day of work,
team lead asked me to study and read the source code.
Opened one file...

I've read so many stuff in english that it feels really weird to read something in my native language(german). Especially when they're using german words in their code:

public Nahrung mittagessen;
public Gast()
{
mittagessen = new Gericht("Wiener Schnitzel");
}

are you fucking kidding me?!

People here are arguing about a guy using MS word as a HTML IDE,
My boss once showed me how blind people read "colors" by running his fingers over the phone screen.

Business Analyst: What language is this on the test site?
Me: I believe that's Latin
BA: But why? No one can read what it says
Me: 😂

Please help me to read this Captcha

!rant I read some documentation about Amazon, "save all the data in my butt".
- me laughing
* I installed the extension that replaces all the instances of" the cloud " by "my butt". I'm easily entertained ;p

What’s wrong with me?... Found myself spreading my finger and thumb on some food packaging cooking instructions hoping to zoom in and read it.

You can keep telling me how to code it, and I can read about how to code it, but until I've successfully coded it in a production environment 5-10 times it's all just theoretical to me.

Students in my CS class be like: "This sucks"
Me: "y tho?"
Them: "Idk man, we thought we'd learn cool hacking stuff here instead of java and shit"

CESSPOOL OF FUCKING DEGENERATES CAN YOU NOT READ

During code review:

Guy (also the same guy who pushes code without making unit tests): "Hey, this thing you added is unnecessary. Remove it."
Me: "Have you read the rest of the changes? It isn't unnecessary."
Guy: "Not yet"

Windows: "You put in a USB I can't read property cuz it's not NTFS/FAT, want me to delete everything??!"

This happens when your feedback is too important.
'I’m sorry I didn’t read your marketing email within 2 minutes of getting it. Please forgive me."

Me, when read old code:
if z == true
return true
else
return false
Yeah, why not stupid fucker.

Normally people read book before going to bed, but I read devRant . Is it only me?

Recruiter: Hey! I found your CV and think you'd be great for this position.

Me: You clearly haven't read my CV. I don't know, nor have ever worked with anything you've mentioned. Why are you wasting my time?

Sometimes I +1 rants just because I took the time read it. At least the rant made me read it.

Boss: I don't want you spending more than 30 min looking into the problem.

Me: ok

Go back to desk and read or watch some cs training. Maybe related.

Go back to boss.

Me: going to take (over estimate tome) to fix.

Boss: ok.

Go back to desk and fix in less time than estimated.

Look like gold.

CSS !important

always annoyed me cz I read it not important where it actually means the opposite... Damn it devs get your shit together!

convinced a friend to join devrant, have to read his every day rants anyway.

he: are you allowed to swear there?
me: are you kidding? THIS IS FUCKING DEVRANT
he: okay i'm in

// LEARN TO READ, FOR FUCKS SAKE

I've been working with a teacher developing a web application for some business that rents stuff.

Long story short, he's so damn incompetent! I mean, for fucks sake, he sent me this picture asking me "what to do"... dude, just fucking read, it says that the VM will capture input and to escape just press right control!!!

I can't believe this guy is a CompSci Engineer...

For some reason, seeing source code in my native language (Czech) disgusts me and decreases my motivation to read through it.

Anyone else knows that feeling?

Me, whenever I read a post about Rust

Super important prospective client: Yes but can your software application do that thing?

Me: Yes, yes it can do that thing.

Prospective: Great, fantastic thank you please take my money.

Me: Awesome.

Me: *runs away to implement that thing*

Please have my tombstone read "sales-oriented software" as cause of death.

All I wanted to do was read up on cassandra and the first two paragraphs gave me existential crisis.

setup my new private project with react, to dive deeper into react.
brain: hey, how about to read a little bit about vue vs. react vs. angular?
me: ok?
me: *reading some articles about the topic*
brain: hey, how about to play around with vue a little bit?
me: ok.

and this is me right now:

So what do you guys do when you're bored?
My friends : Browse Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, read some blogs maybe..

Me : Browse through the Arch Linux wiki... I mean,... you know Twitter, Reddit, the usual..

took me 3 hours to figure out why my app isnt working just so i can read my own code slowly like a retard and see this

My face when I read a rant and think it's my coworkers ranting about me...

Me: My site doesn't validate for AMP because of some JavaScript the app performance measurement tool inserts into every post.

Support: Do the thing.

Me: I know, but how?

Support: Read the docs.

Me: All it says is "do the thing". But it doesn't state how.

Support: So, do the thing.

Listen, I get you're a junior.

But please read the fucking spec I spent quite some time on writing for you before you ask me a bunch of irrelevant questions, which you know would be irrelevant IF YOU READ THE SPEC!

Trust me.

Read the spec.

It will be clear.

My previous manager: "Your code should hard to read, so our work is cant stolen by everyone".
Me: "Why?"
My previous manager: "Just do it"
Me: "Okay"

So, anyone can answer my 'Why?' question?

P.S: My previous Manager is PHP Programmer

When it's dark outside all the time and the sun suddenly comes around.

Everyone's going crazy about it and walking outside.

Me: FUCK. How am I supposed to read my freakin code like that?!

*Me standing up and closing the shutter*

When i read this, I think "Inject me please! Inject me with all you got!"

This awesome experience from Apple highly encouraged me to read their 80,000,000 word terms and conditions.

Read some books
Get a computer
Write some codes
Use Linux
Hate Microsoft
Argue Vim vs Emacs
Debate 4 spaces vs tabs
Use dark themes
Follow buzzwords..
Now repeat after me, "I am a programmer...."

Welp, fuck that shit.

The boss just called me to tell me d good news that they won't need me anymore...

I made them 1 project for about a year ( + fixing/updating few other projects )

... and that apparently is all they need for now and r gonna back to IT crowd ( read this as 2 ppl IT department )

was fun =]

Well I slapped some text into a file and it screamed at me.

Slapped some more text into another file and it didn’t scream at me.

I then watched videos and read books that detailed the slapping of text into files.

Tldr I kinda just taught myself somehow

So I just completed reading this book and it was pretty awesome. Can anyone recommend me similar books? Which are not language specific but cover computer science concepts & is fun to read.

To the coworkers who won't read this -- If you have a question to message me, type the QUESTION ITSELF. Don't coyly request permission to ask me a question because you're worried you'll bother me, that just turns it into TWO questions. Let us put an end to saying 'hey, can I ask you a question' and then virtually walking away.

OMG. They have finally read my dreams!!! Take me with you!!!!

> 14 years old
> Read about worms
> Making virus sounds cools
> Decided to make one
> Dreamed how I would use it on my friends
> Made a "virus" that looks for all the exe files and append "malicious" content
> Ended up messing my own system

This story makes me feel that I was
1) dumb
2) slow af( took me days to read/write properly)

One of those has changed now 😜

I had done a fresh reinstall of Ubuntu Server on my server PC, cloned my websites from their GitHub repos, and couldn't for the life of me get Nginx to read them correctly.

I forgot to install PHP. 😑

I read a bible verse and get back to what I was doing
God always gives me power

So y'all listen to me.

No Software Development methodology or technique is a silver bullet. None!

Every engineer must acquire the ability to know when and where to use different approaches, appropriately.

Well, you wanna read that again.

So.. Win10 BSOD. TO READ A MINIDUMP I HAVE TO INSTALL FOOKING VS17, FUCK ME SIDEWAYS WITH A RUSTY PITCHFORK

-Hi, my PlayStation’s storage is almost full? Can you change it?
Me: yes, but why not just buy an external one....
-We can’t add games on it.
Me: ... See here. Read. It’s possible. How much storage does the PS have now?
-93GB
Me: ... Total? 500 GB?
-Yes, I think.
Me: buy a 4 TB one will last long enough.
-Ok. Can you come to install it if it’s arrived?
Me: Ok...

Can’t people just read on fucking internet how to connect an external drive to a PlayStation??
I don’t understand... I’m a software guy not fucking hardware...

I swear upon the gods of the internet! Any time I am trying to read an article/blog post/anything and the site puts a god damn pop-up form asking me to sign up for something, I leave the site. ESPECIALLY ON MOBILE WHEN YOU CANT CLOSE THE DAMN WINDOW WITHOUT GIVING UP YOUR INFO.

And every time a client asks me to do this I nicely explain how much people hate pop-ups, 99% of the time I've closed the window or tab before I even read what the box is asking for, I don't care.

If the user is trying to read something, then they are trying to read something, and they don't want to be bothered with your ridiculous attempts for information gathering so you can spam them later.

Something that really irritates me is when someone requests a read receipt for an email. My team of 4 including my team leader has several apps that we own with several different product owners. Sometimes one of the product owners or someone who works for them sends an email and requests a read receipt. I feel like that is very cocky, like they are trying to exert control over me or something deeper. Maybe it's just me.

What cheapest macbook model has touchbar? This isn’t for me, I’ve read like 2016 2017 model that has touchbar and then I read that it has been discontinued

School taught me how to read,
Python taught me how to think,
JavaScript taught me how to work,
Go taught me how to act.

So I'm just wondering if this happened to everyone else because a few friends of mine at work have corroborated my experience.

So, when I was very young and just starting to learn PHP, I was trying to grasp OOP. I read and read about it and did the example tutorials and nothing really did it for me. Then one day, writing some scripts for a game I played, it just hit me. Literally like "oh.....I get it. That's why this is a thing."

I usually read rants while using public transport. What is the probability that the person about whom I'm reading is sitting right beside me!

I don't understand, you pester me to send you an email and stress how it's so important. I send you the email and you don't read it. I remind you about the email days later and you still don't read it. You miss a deliverable because you DIDN'T READ THE FUCKING EMAIL I SENT AND ITS SOMEHOW MY FAULT??!?

Furthermore, you call a meeting after the fact and ask me to read out and explain the contents of the email to you? GTFO you friggin time drain 🖕

Me when I read about another JS framework, gulp module or workaround for using ES2016 features today.

Good ol' fucking brain-dead autistic dipshit me just pulled an all-nighter reading rants on fucking devrant

Now wish me a good day's sleep you perfect-ragging entertaining bastards filling up devrant with the best posts I've ever read about programming.

Dear companies.

Please don't read resume on holidays.
It make me doubt work environment.

Sometimes I write so many comments that it's hard for me to read the code :/

Super stoked. Hubby just gave me this. Now to binge read and see how much I can learn and understand in a short period 😁😁🤩🤩

!rant
I have come to realize, after a long time in programming and using libraries, that spending time to read their documentation saves me time in the long run

*at work*

co-worker: what are u doing?

me: programming and learning

co-worker: but school has just started... u guys havent learnt anything yet

me: thats the great thing about programming, everything is already in the internet waiting to be read and learned. try it next time ;)

co-worker: learning out of school, no thanks

ERROR MESSAGE:
<I am written in plain english>
<Here is the line number of the error>
<Here is the possible reason for the error>

Developer: What the heck is wrong with my code now. (looking at source)

ERROR MESSAGE:
<You incompetent piece of s**t, READ ME. F'n READ ME. Please READ ME. I promise, I be helpful.>
<Nope. You aren't gonna. Fine!>

read some rants about a devRant meetup?

how do I know they are not from my manager trying to catch me rant-handed?

"Yeah, I got your e-mail, I see the subject. Oh no, dude, it says urgent so it went straight to the URGENT queue. Yeah? Ah. Sure, I'll get to it as soon as I get through the ASAP, NOW and YESTERDAY queues. Well, if you wanted me to read it right away you should've say there's NO HURRY - I read only one no-hurry e-mail a day but there's currently 0 tasks on that queue."

Co-employee in Slack: Let's get this bread

*1 hour later*

That guy: Bread has been acquired

Meanwhile me: *Forgot to eat breakfast and read the sentence wrong*

God I wish I was that guy

The first ever actual book about software development and comp-sci theory that I am trying to read. Wish me luck!

My brother, who is a programmer too, throwed the big java book at me and said: Read this and you'll have a job. So I read it and got a job. I'm a practical learner, so I just picked up the basics from the book. OOP and all that I learned while working. It was like a decently payed apprentice position. But I was my own teacher.

He read "Knowledge is a wealth that cannot be stolen"

Then saw me doing something with chmod and then he typed on his terminal

chmod 777 -R

hey helo i doNT GIVE A SHIT THAT YOU CANT READ MY DOCUMENTATION AND SPAM ME WITH QUESTIONS THAT HAVE THE ANSWER WRITTEN IN THE SPECIFICATION YOU WROTE IM PLAYING FUCKING LEAGUE YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHIT

I never thought I was a highly opinionated person (read: elitist) until I realized it bothered me that my coworker prefers low-profile rubber dome keyboards to mechanical ones. I'm going on a journey for personal growth this week.

I have read everything available about blockchains and I still didn't understand why a company should need one.

I don't know if the problem is me or them

"Hey, I learned what the internet was yesterday and read some random stuff some strangers said. Let me tell you about the best materials to learn web development."

- Way too many people

Me and friend talking about a paper.

Friend: how much do you want me to read?

Me: readln

Friend: ???

I dread the day that Slack has a “... has read this message 2 seconds ago” feature. Please Slack, continue letting me pretend I haven’t seen that message that I don’t want to reply to.

When the madness known as "software development" gets me down, I visit DevRant to complain and read about people who have it harder than me.

I just wanted to offer my condolences... Ya'll are so much more fucked than I am. 👍

funny how google sent me a notification to read this very important news

Me: ...blockchain...
*Wanna be techies*
*Investors*
*Dude who read a few articles about blockchain*

Recruiter: I might have the perfect role for you that will match your salary expectations, they want to send you a technical challenge using Java.
Me: Did you read my CV headline at all?
Recruiter: is Java and Javascript not the same?
Me: Thanks but no thanks.

😤 sometimes when I read devRant comments...😧

If I wanted a solution I would ask on stack overflow.

Let me have my hate.

I have a pm to force choke.

It's 10 AM and I've already read code that makes me want to vomit. Guess it's one of those days.

There are no words to say how much I hate it when people put spaces in front of the brackets of function calls. No one ever can tell me that this would be easier to read...

Me: Fuck there's a null pointer exception here... What was trying to happen here
*Read comments*
*It's written in binary... dafuq why though*
*looks up what it says*
*Reads output*
"Sorry bud, if you couldn't figure this out... then no one can"

I miss page inspect tool in mobile browsers. I came across this website that is forcing me to login, in order to read it's article.

me: import express from 'express';

my IDE: quick fix: remove import express from 'express'; ('express' is declared but its value is never read.)

me: // you don't say, as I only just started typing!

This isn't a rant. This is a brag on my team.
I asked the team what exactly a feature did. They read me the test code.
I may get a little weepy. So proud.

My internship company does not believe in the concept of 'commenting'. They just tell me: "Ahh just write readable code!
Yeah that's cool until I need to read out thousands of lines of javascript without a single comment!

!rant
I only subscribe to mobile data plan just to read devRants. It makes me happy.

Bruh, catch everyone on LinkedIn posting about how much they love their company/team.

Translated, these read "Please don't sack me!"

Looking at some legacy code and I was like wtf, later read the author name and it was me.
How people were tolerating me than! Man😂

I feel very sad. No one loves me....
.
.
.
wait.... I just read...

Devrant: @UserIFollow posted new rant
Me: Oh cool, I need a break anyways...
...
Me: There is new stuff in dayly toprants. I have to read them, too.
...
Me: Oh damn, so much time gone already. I have to work now...

Devrant: @UserIFollow posted new rant

...

Me showing boss a draft document

Me: Ok so this is a placeholder list of statuses, I have to call the client to find out what statuses should go here.

Boss: Hold on lemme read it. *Reads*. But this list of statuses is incomplete, you should call the client to find out what statuses we should add.

Me: ಠ_ಠ

That was the first time an image didn't contain the searched for term, so I never read the text "press skip [...]" and really tired me, tried to find a bridge for too long

Being a programmer and had to read scientific papers is the worst. the way they name variables in the pseudocodes making me puke.

If only.

Tbh. When I read about ruby and how it was meant to be as close to English as possible a little part of me was hoping for this

Seeing so many posts of unsupportive family members makes me sad. :(

I was supported a lot by my family, got provided with all the books I wish for... In a time when there was no Stackoverflow or good tutorials.

I read most books during high school and got beat up for it... But look at me now! :D

The amount of times I have read "I can't summit the application" in user issue tickets has prompted me to make this

Soo why the fuck am I receiving notifications about someone from my contacts is available on messenger, when you don't fucking have the permissions to read my contacts? I'm looking at you Facebook Messenger.

That's some new level of ignorance. "Oh I see you didn't gave me the permissions to read your contacts. Worry not my friend just let me take a secret peek of it. I will be discreet, I promise!"... Well FUCK YOU!

P.S.: I only use that piece of garbage because unfortunately some of my friends are only available there... Time to convince them to switch.

Most web developers have to use CSS every now and then. I don't really mind using CSS every know and then, but one thing really bugs me. As a developer, I read ! as "not". In CSS !important becomes "not" important. However, when I read CSS I still read "not" important, when I know this really worked the other way around.

BTW, when I first came across !important many years ago, I really thought it meant a rule was not important, really confusing!

Being a computer science engineer, my friends expect me to be able to read binary like I read English. Fml.

What a cool question... um

My super power would be to intuitively read assembly. I could also focus it into laser eyes. A super power can do other things. Tell me why it shouldn't.

Bug fixed! Commit, close ticket.

Ticket reopens. Dang.. let me test it. Still fixed, wtf? Send message to QA guy that opened it again.

"Read my comment." Comment has some entirely different yet slightly related bug.

Leap out window.

I have a coder friend...
Here's a translated conversation. (read original one followed)
She: Watcha doin?
Me: Foolishness.
She: Means what are you making?
Me: A fool.

Original--
She: Kya kar rahe ho?
Me: Chutiyapa
She: Matlab kya bana rahe ho?
Me: Chutiya :/

fuck u aws

all that money and u can't read idiot proof documentation for me to have SQS connect to a VPC endpoint to read a message

also fuck u search algorithms for not handing me an easy bake solution to what is a not a novel situation

also fuck me for being unable to git gud

!rant

Thank you devrant community

it's because of you that I passed my graduation project presentation
Everything I read on here teaches me something new

Thank you so much

now that monday is almost over for me, here's a couple of questions:

1) From 0-10, how good was it for you?
2) Had you read it, would you say my post wishing you a passable monday worked?

Block off blocks of time as “unavailable” and use that for me time. Gym. Take a walk. Watch some tv. Read a book.

I dream of a chat bot that would read my Kanban/scrum boards and answer status queries for me.
Instead of spending 1h13mins (I measured) on average EACH AND EVERY DAY just telling people whatever is written on the story cards, the robot could tell them for me.

Maybe someone will suggest on the comments that people should just read by themselves on the story cards. Yeah, people will ask you where the toilet is while you are peeing on it. That is why we need robot nannies for professional adults.

Fuck windows and fuck policies that read my hdd as unencrypted forcing me to restart in the middle of a massive data transfer operation. That is all.

Today I read a job offer from my previous workplace and all the things that bothered me there had put them as their points in favor. They are definitely liars

No x-server, wayland. just drm and framebuffer. use computer just fine in this env. I can watch youtube and video. play music, play twitter, read rss, edit my program, surf a web, connect with other computer, view my image, read pdf with this freaking lightweight env.
Basicly, my super battery saver mode.
(want me to list all of these cli/tui app?)

WTF PEOPLE!!
Some people really need to read their error messages.

Just now I got this teammate asking me how he should handle the error git returned. The error message stated: "Please commit your changes or stash them before you merge." He asked me what he should do to fix the error... I was astonished by his stupidity that he did not read the fucking error message.

Almost every fucking time a teammate comes to me with the question how to fix an error, there is a message that says how to fix the error. Why don't they read them?!?! I told you so many times to read your fucking error messages!!!

I'm really glad the project is over in a couple of weeks and I get a new team..

I don't know why but whenever I find Flutter and Dart together. i read that Fart. I know it's just me.

!dev

Saturday... Weekend... Let me get back my sleep from weekdays...

Zzz..zzzz...**phone call**

Yeah, phone woke me, didnt even read who called. Oh, great. My bosss needs quick help and will come nearby my home in an hour.

Yaaaaay... Fuck.

Today I met a guy who fuckin remembers some shitty flag he had set in a code 10 years ago and can read code in his brain for anything he had coded.

Fuck you ass hole you got be shitting me, oh come on show me something fucker. You make me sick.

!rant
I have been lurking around here for about a month. Finally decided to write about how devRant motivates me. Whenever I read stuff I don't understand it makes me realize I've got so much more to learn. Happy new year :)

1) Let me work with devs without me having to explain fundamentals of programming

2) Stop devs from copy pasting code from StackOverflow or any other project without actually understanding what it does

3) Get devs to actually read and understand project documentation FIRST before jumping into any programming work

I am going to fly to Turkey and visit some awesome touristic places.
In case, if I get bored, I will need a book to read.
Spam me with your book suggestions! It can be dev related, car related or even a novel!

Want to read a book that can help me avoid newb mistakes and can help me write beautiful code ?

Pragmatic programmer(1999)
Or
Clean code
Or
any other book ?
Help me !!?

Me trying to hack inside the place where I live ( it’s like a hotel). And I read this:

A client asks me to produce a Release note when publishing a new version, which is more than fair ask, I shall deliver.

Then he asks me questions on the version's feature which are clearly described in the release note, with examples, showing he did not bother to read it..............

...

How to make me not want to
ever contribute to you:

'Please read and sign this CLA'

( Also telling me that shit only whenI try
opening a PR, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU )

Just unsubscribe me!! I don't want to read anything or enter the email address I just came from.

Don't make me think!

What's the best dev-related book you ever read?

I've sure I'm forgetting some, but I'll go with "Don't Make Me Think".

Thought I might see if there's anything intriguing I've not come across yet.

My wife asked me if I get bored reading and writing "in code" all day, when I could just read and write normal English.

In uni
Lecturer: SOAP is insecure...

In interview: Any disadvantages you see with SOAP?

Me: The last i read SOAP is insecure. Im abit rusty with this knowledge

Interviewer: ahhh okay, SOAP is actually secure...

DAMN YOU LECTURER!

Is it just me or does everybody read Magento as magneto ...

my busineas user asked me today.

How and why do you read log file
Does it even help..?

Senior argue with me that Java can’t do serial programming, I prove to him by read the hardware protocol in HEX , and convert to ASCII using Java. He said the F word to me , I was like “他是什麼意思啊？”

!rant

Just read an article about a blind sofftware developer, who is proficient in way more technologies then me, for example.

He can use certain screen reader and code edor combo to read out the text, and also something called refreshable braille display.

This is so insiprational and only goes to show that there is no excuse whatsoever for a person NOT to learn software developing...

Be me. Use DDG to search for nearby bowling alleys. DDG provides reviews in form of Yelp. Click "read more" on review. Yelp transfers me to a bogus url, which prompts

"Open in Another App?

Would you like to leave DuckDuckGo to view this content?

No Yes"

And then, without letting me click "No", I get automatically transferred into Yelp's page in the app store, and if I try to go back, I just get redirected again.

Fuck off. I just wanted to read your reviews in the browser. I had no interest of downloading your app just to read a couple of reviews, and I most certa-fuck-inly have no desire to download your shitty app now.

Made parsers that are downloading and parsing 100 years of law data right now.

I am so happy I don’t have to read every document and just let computer do it for me.

That are great times we live in.

Read this somewhere: Most students don't love programming so much because they are taught it as a science, while it is a craft.

Got me thinking. So true.

I'm reading 'JavaScript: The Good Parts'. Nearly a quarter of the way through and all I've read about are bad parts. I thought this would make me like JavaScript more, not less!

Anyone else get called cute nicknames working in IT?

My favourite is one of the VPs at my company calls me a warlock, because I can read code that he calls "archaic scribble"

if being a developer was a dream to me, it was because I knew I would get to read formal and lengthy RFCs from the IETF.

Video games? Alcohol? Fucking? Ain't got shit on reading one of these things.

Is it just me or are there others who like programming and enjoy the work but just can't do it all day. After 10 hours I don't even want to look at a screen much less code more or read about it.

Acting as a volunteer project manager temporarily at the moment, it angers me that people don't read documentations before they ask questions.

So I wrote the script for the GAL in WinCupl for our project. I used the operators: ! for NOT, * for AND, + for OR

me: *writes code*
me: *compiles it*
compiler: error, unknown operation.
me: wtf but thats how its done, isnt it?
friend: u used the wrong operators. didnt u read the manual?
me: smh i didnt, i invented the syntax xD

lesson learned: always read manual first before writing it directly without knowing the syntax

My original project has morphed and twisted to become this monster where I’ll need to learn PHP, databases, and somehow get a desktop C# app to read the remote database and execute tasks based upon times in the database. God help me.

Pun of the day:
How many people can read hex if only you, me and dead people understand it?

I see a lot of people on this weekly rant telling they go lunch, read a book, play guitar...

And then i look at me, working in an office, only being able to silently cry in front of the screen.

FML. Just when I finally managed to dual boot win10 and centos, only to just read the news of RHEL change its focus and shift to make me a beta user into Centos Stream. Time to distro hop to Arch.

Have you worked with GraphQL? Saw it for the first time and it looks like a pretty good tool for working with APIs, to me. I am excited to read your opinions about GraphQL.

Read logs
Turn on the debugger
Stop bothering me

Was trying to see why a (luckily) wiped drive wasn't reading out of nowhere, got to feel it try to read from the platters, arm flailing to try and read anything, and suddenly it just... gave up, arm parked, platters spun down... It still had power, it just stopped and didn't start back up, except for a moment or two of spin when power is applied.

I felt a HDD give up and die and it made me kinda sad.

What do you recommend to read for Android developement? The SO documentation is not that great for me since I'm just strarting to create some apps?

I've wrote the shittiest Assingenment ever. My college gave me 92%. I can't believe that they actually read it. I'm angry and also exited :D

I've read so many rants while testing my app that I have to implement the Surprise Me feature.

(My app filters out rants I've seen before)

Friends do have their uses after all.

Me: I'm still trying to find a to-do app I actually like.
Friend: Don't you make software for a living?
Me: More of a help desk monkey but yes.
Friend: Why don't you just make the app you want?
Me: Because it hadn't occurred to me that I could probably do that until now.

Time to go read up on android development and java.

I love when recruiters ring me up telling me all about the fantastic opportunity they have for a junior php Dev role a hundred miles away, offering 13k a year. These guys obviously don't read cv's

I guess this is gonna be one of those days where I have to re-read a paragraph over and over until I finally remember something. I'm just trying to learn D: Why won't you let me brain?

I have only read negative things about slack - can any of you give me a good list of reasons for why people don't like it and whether that's accurate

Why on earth I am doing docs and sending them to the whole team, if they keep asking me how to do X and why is Y not working

YOU WILL KNOW IF YOU READ THE DOCS

GAAAAAAA

Are you fucking kidding me?

Just read about Intel ME (I'm trying to secure my computer). Why the holy fuck does Intel need something that powerful? FUCK YOU, CORPORATE BASTARDS IN SUITS THAT RESEMBLE MATRIX AGENTS.

Does anyone have any tips or updates on this? The article I read was from Jan 2016...