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Dev confession.
Everybody in my department thinks I am a genius programmer.
I am just a better googler who knows how to apply things.13 -
Oh boy!
Time to apply for dev jobs!
Good thing HR is fair and just!
*submits résume*
"I'm sorry but you're not qualified. The programming language we use is listed last on your resume."
Welcome to HR Hell ladies and gentleman.2 -
*Me and my workmates laughing and having fun before going home*
Me: Hey, do you want to hear a joke?
Workmate 1: What is it?
Me: Look at your code.
...
...
...
Other workmates: BURRRRRNNNN!!!!4 -
Donald Trumph is a remainder that you should just apply for a job you want even if you don't have the experience!!4
-
I remember reading shampoo directions as a kid and it feeling wrong to exit the cycle.
1. wet hair
2. apply shampoo
3. lather
4. repeat
I didn't choose development life, it chose me2 -
We have an API which returns 600 MB of JSON.
Because client "Wants to see everything first and then apply filters, just like Excel".
FML
Edit and ofc thier laptops with core i3 and 4GB of ram can't even process that.40 -
One of my favorite quotes:
"A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine"
Had to apply this liberally at my last job. Even had it posted at my desk for a time.1 -
Have you ever seen an app or website so awful you seriously consider to apply for a job at its maintainer company just to fix the flaws?8
-
A recruiter reached out to me via email and a voicemail. I politely declined and asked not to be contacted anymore. Somehow the asshole ends up in my office and comes up and introduces himself while he is with one of my superiors. He said we "spoke on the phone" (a lie) and he wanted to meet me. Creeped me out beyond belief, regardless for his true purpose of being there (which is still unknown to me).7
-
I swear 90% of people who apply for a dev job couldn't code to save their fucking lives.
Like wtf? You can't apply for a job as a commercial pilot, then turn up and announce you've never flown a plane before, so why is that accepted as being somewhat expected in development?
Fucking hell....9 -
How do you make a job offer so that only real 1337 haxx0rs will apply? Well https://automattic.com/ has found a way I guess.
4 -
How my resignation letter would be..
Dear Sir,
Please accept my resignation as I have decided to apply for your post.
Thanking you,
Sincerely Yours,
XYZ -
My former team opened two different positions to replace me: senior computer vision engineer and senior computer graphics engineer.
If you combine the required experience years, it's roughly my age 😂
Talk about unrealistic and unnecessary job requirements....4 -
This is in one of the big 5 (not specifying which for some anonymity)
I apply for an internship.
I get an interview.
I pass the interview and get the internship.
I do great in the internship. Get an exceeds expectations.
I apply for conversion.
I ace the two interviews.
I am told that the hiring committee gave me a yes.
I enter host matching (ie to find a team to join).
...
And that's it. I never get matched (I only met 1 team that had UI focus and I had previously asked to not be put on a UI team so the TL rejected me). 1 year later I'm told sorry the offer is no longer valid.
The annoying bit is that I decided not to apply to grad school and refused all other offers under the assumption that it was a guaranteed spot.1 -
Off to an interview with a design agency I didn't apply because of people who I don't know referred me.
Wish me good luck!3 -
Of all people that apply for a job at our company, 95% can't write a loop that counts from 1 to 10.
And if that's not bad enough: our bosses state "we shouldn't ask such difficult tasks."18 -
My brother, as a 23 year old trying to apply for mechanical engineering jobs, came across this posting!
That's why they say, start young, kids :P
8 -
Wow Mozilla published an infographic instead of an actual blog post and didn't include an alt-tag. Let's just ignore the fact that blind users exist and use screenreaders, articles about privacy don't apply to them right?
9 -
Manager: How's the site going. Can I see it?
Dev: ya sure
M: what's that
Dev: that's a * it means some restrictions apply.
M: hmmmm
M: make it a diamond
4 -
I only have one rule when it comes to stickers on laptop:
Do I reguraly use the software on the sticker? - If yes, apply to PC7 -
Max file size allowed is 10 MB, and this is what I get when I try to upload a 5 MB file. Do I really want to apply here?
15 -
There was maybe one of the coolest methods of apply for a job. There was a company in Sydney on linkedin on the apply href for the job was pointing to localhost (might of been a accident) so you had to find their website and with the trailing url get to the page then they said to send OPTIONS request to a endpoint here you got a link to a api doc to where you send a POST to apply for a job they had a example body to use. So sending the Post request with with postman required headers so looking more into the doc it gave the headers needed. Now the example body for the post had some errors in it and once they are fixed you can then submit the request.
NOW thats the way to find competent developers shame I'm not one of the.5 -
junior developer position:
You must know:
HTML
CSS
JavaScript
React
Vue
Angular
Java
PHP
C
C++
Ruby on Rails
Python
Computer Science degree required
Expect a 10 round interview process
And if you're still alive after that,
You're hired!
Apply now!13 -
> scrolling through facebook feed
> see ad to apply as an app developer at carrefour
> "you might win 300€ to spend at carrefour"
> "we're searching for an app developer"
> apply
> first test is to make a button that adds stuff to an HTML list, very basic
> pass the first test
> get an email: "you can candidate to the next phase and might get a job"
MFW I just wanted to get 300€ and not a job
6 -
Any editor I use, I apply a dark theme.
Most of colleagues find it irritating, but for me is more appealing to code with a dark background.2 -
starting my own linux based company, macrohard
our first piece of software will be a linux distro known as doors, and we're going to have a line of tablets called macrohard floors
comment below to apply, and with more product suggestions25 -
"Sleep" is the last frontier in high performance computing. Is your code still slow? Just Sleep™, and you'll have your results instantly*.
* Speed benefits apply only to the sleeper. Sleep is not a solution for immediate deadlines.3 -
Why the hell would I apply for a job as a JS developer when you can't even write proper JS? You're advertising on fucking NPM!
17 -
Just sent all of the papers needed to apply to the schools I want for next year... CS, here I come!
So excited about studying something I love so much 😁7 -
My college forces you to take chemistry, physics, mechanics, philosophy, and Environmental science before you even take your first coding course. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY......... I didn't apply for this XD7
-
I have just solved a problem that had already several days ago: to apply the elimination of a specific color in a photography of animal fabrics.
Thank you SimpleCV <3
7 -
#programmingstuff
A parent may kill it's children if the task assigned to them is no longer needed.
*Don't apply it to real world.5 -
Woke up after a 2-3 hours nap at night just to have a career-panic and apply for all the jobs I'm overqualified for.
... Now I regret it.
😐6 -
My last job application letter was literally: “I saw your add and since you don’t do web stuff I decided to apply”
Hired1 -
When you're tuning the Frame-Color for the devranton application, accidentally apply it globally and it kinda looks nice:
12 -
1 like and i apply to f# jobs with only ocaml experience and when they ask about it ill just say "well f# is just a cheap ripoff of ocaml so i should be fine"11
-
It's funny to see creator of a product not being experienced enough to apply for the job posting related to the same product...😂
https://twitter.com/tiangolo/...
4 -
Can https be decrypted easily?
(Or even by spending some time)
Plus what other security methods banks apply to prevent theft of sensible data?
Do they encrypt data using thair own private key thet is changed automatically?29 -
If you want a New Zealand developer job, you need a work visa. If you apply a work visa you need a job offer to get enough points...6
-
Shit you can apply this to coding too.
"When you fix a bug in your code"
Red: Actually does what you want
Blue: Completely fucks your entire program up.
10 -
Apply for position as an iOS developer. Nail the interview. Get the job. Get asked to write backend in JavaScript. Now I gotta learn JavaScript.9
-
Hey Python, why in the ever loving readability universe I can't break the following command across multiple lines?
df.replace(...).apply(...).reset_index().drop(...)
Oh, but I hear you say "Hitko, why you can break it into multiple lines if you break within brackets!"
To which I ask you, does this shit look any more readable?
df.replace(...
).apply(...
).reset_index(
).drop(...)15 -
Whenever I make instant coffee, I apply this formula:
18ml² water + (recommendSpoons*2) + (milk*M³)
Where 'M' stands for the motivation which is a constant of 06 -
Joined a company as a junior developer and have been working there for almost 4 years.
Too scared to leave because I don't know if I'm good enough to apply for a non junior role :(
Is this the so called "imposter syndrome?"10 -
Is it just the novice in me that finds the Haskell community's misguided obsession over character count really annoying? Learn You a Haskell For Greater Good states
> Shorter code means less bugs
A lot of people and resources seem to share this opinion, but it's obviously false. Simpler code means less bugs, but look at this function which just means "apply this applicative to each element of a list"
> sequence :: (Applicative f) => [f a] -> f [a]
> sequence = foldr (liftA2 (:)) (pure [])
This isn't "less buggy", it's fucking madness. The same in JS, the king of unreadable languages, would be:
function sequence(seq, val, apply = (f, x) => f(x)) {
seq.map(f => apply(f, val))
}
Seriously, how can you design a strictly typed language that gets beaten by JS in readability?16 -
The hat you wear matters a lot, you don't apply for a job as a Penetration tester with a black hat on.
1 -
I thought I would quickly restyle the web version of devRant to make it a bit easier to read on big screens.
You can get it here https://userstyles.org/styles/...
and apply it using stylish or copy the CSS and apply it via the method of your choice.
There is another userstyle for devRant out there, but it's not complete and doesn't seem to be updated.
Have fun!
7 -
Google was hiring till the last week. If you didn't apply, don't worry. They already has all your information. They will call you if they like you.6
-
So, Europe lost today...
Now we just have to hope, that companies will apply these laws only in countries where they should, otherwise a really dark times for internet are coming.9 -
The trope of pressing "p" in the address bar and getting pornhub as the autofill sure does apply to me for "d" and devRant
-
When you thought writing code on paper in university was bad, wait till you apply to Google and have one of your interviews writing code in Google docs.6
-
Opening up the docs, a book or a bunch of random pages online.
build something stupidly horrible to familiarise myself with different aspects and rinse and repeat until it’s something I think is worthy of being released into the wild. -
Our Professor gave us a predefined Datebase with access methods. The whole database is full of
value == 0 ? false : true
How can this guy teach programming languages when he can't apply a simple != operand6 -
!rant
Going to apply for Remote Development Jobs. Wish me luck guys because I really don't have any qualifications just experience and knowledge. As you know some recruiters look for qualifications as well.6 -
Apply for a data engineer role.
Get invited for a data science interview.
HR says they're building AI and I were to supervise another person writing its algorithm.
It's a media company.
*Risitas intensifies*6 -
Never forget, learning feels like flailing.
If you're not flailing, you're not learning.
Warning: does not apply to swimming.13 -
I've heard alot about decipline...
Tryed to apply it for thousend times but no use!
Need some help 😬1 -
I saw a job I could apply, I matched all the requirements, 100%. Not only the bases requirements, but I also had almost all the extras, and the company was in my country and spoke my language, it's good for me since my English isn't perfect.
I didn't apply because I'll graduate soon and I want to focus on my degree.
I bet that when I graduate all my current knowledge will be obsolete and I'll no find any job - not even if I beg for it - until I starve. Do you want to bet a beer? I'm ready10 -
Find out the company hiring and apply directly to the company. Don't go through a 3rd party agency if you can avoid it. It gives the company a massive saving and a great incentive to hire you.1
-
Why does every god dam company require me to create an account to their HR hiring site in order to apply? Ive had to create like 100 accounts now just for them to reject me...6
-
I activated my LinkedIn yesterday and I got an email today from a Facebook London for interview.
Lol wtf! I didn't even apply or search anything related.
And the role is for Product Leadership.
What should I do guys?30 -
/**
Fresh university graduate.
Looks for positions to apply to.
Refines search to "Entry-level".
All minimum qualifications: 5-10 years industry
experience.
Cries.
**/7 -
Companies like this one do love exportation. What junior+ developer would switch jobs to an intern that is unpaid?
Not even students (Or graduates) can apply to this position.
15 -
My boss did not care about making things secure in our early development stage, even though I told him several times.
After 1 day our elastic search cluster was filled with random crappy data.
Fix: Apply security schemes provided by AWS1 -
You really start to question your choices in life when you can't get hired or get paid freelance work, so you apply to help (for free) on Catchafire... and get rejected.
2 -
Me after a good day at work: “Hmmmm… I like it here. I can stay for at least a year”
Me after a bad day at work: “Fuck this. I should apply for jobs elsewhere. Fuck Capitalism”6 -
Why computer science student have a stereotype to have a 'gaming' or high-end laptops? my first impression was that. and i think that is stupid. is this only in my country or apply all-over the place?12
-
1) Apply Vue.js to a real life project
2) Make a CMS for a private school (unluckily, they don't want a standard CMS)
3) Learning wisely of the mistakes I made this year with clients ("what if we added this?")1 -
Stop sucking at competitive programming
Learn Android development with kotlin
Learn machine learning and apply it -
Who is bored with their job?
Wish you had something more challenging other than the same drivel day in and day out? Wish you could learn new things or apply better technologies to existing solutions other than just trudging through each day?
7 -
Thanks Android 14. Now we have to install outdated apk's with adb and a flag 🙄. May apply to devRant too.17
-
The “if” statement works the same in every* language, so if you can code in one language, you can code in most of them.
*Terms and conditions apply.5 -
Stop being high, Monster! Why the heck should I apply to a SENIOR developer position when my skills/experience are of a graduate?!
Job seeking site being troll... 😒2 -
When you go to an architecture meeting and people's statements are so abstract that they could apply to any product on the face of the earth.1
-
Things I understand but still hate #457:
"You must restart this _application or OS_ for changes to apply."1 -
*Spends the day writing script to back up production nosql databases before applying sweeping schema changes.*
*Accidentally runs the script to apply sweeping changes instead of backup.*
😭2 -
These are the rules that apply to all of my JS projects:
- 100% typescript, “any” is not allowed
- strict prettier with pre-commit hook
- no semicolons
- no braces around single argument of an arrow function
- tabs7 -
Just got my stickers 😁😁. Quick question: if I apply them to the back of my laptop, can I remove them after a couple of years if I decide to sell my laptop
4 -
oh fuuuck!
hate that feeling to see in around my place many companies searching for devs but im not skilled enough yet to apply 😢11 -
When I have to apply a strong coat of
reverse engineering to understand an
open source codebase, what's the
point of being open.
No but really, the
WORKS ON MY BRAIN
movement is quite strong ..6 -
What do you think about my resume?
I would like to apply for other jobs, im tired of my shitty actual job.
I'm worried about the ranting on the resume, is that politically correct?
https://drive.google.com/file/d/...15 -
Hey Lemonade is looking for 10x engineers! Please apply only if you write code that has at least 7 layers of abstraction. Thanks!
🤣
https://makers.lemonade.com/recipe/...8 -
Summer starts now!
Things to do.
1. Get better at overwatch
2. Learn 3d modeling
4. Learn animation
5. Learn how to apply programming to animation to make the process quicker
6...do job bc I need money.5 -
Intern position:
"Proficient understanding of NodeJS, MangoDB, Other back-end technologies.
Aw, MangoDB?
Now I can't apply..9 -
Wouldn't say our teamwork failed we just sucked that day.
I had a ticket to fix a SQL sp and then correct some data afterwards. As this was the typical "urgent fix need now" we went through a different process for fixing it.
Me: Just sent you some scripts can you check them over before we apply it to uat?
Boss: let's go through it together.
5 mins later
Boss: looks fine I'll apply the scripts.
2 minutes later
Me: did you apply the scripts to uat?
Boss: No I applied them to live.
Me: oh ... oh no.
At this point I realized I was missing a critical where clause so yup my update was applied against all of the data.
Boss: oh
Yup he just spotted my error.
Helpdesk phones start ringing
Boss: you pick it up it's your code
Me: hey you applied its your problem now.
One db restore and several incident meetings later we fixed it. Twas a fun day.1 -
Ooh. Here's a "deep" one.
For the self thought/online learners, at what point did you consider yourself an "actual" developer and felt ready to go out and apply for jobs and stuff?
And what challenges/reactions did you face?3 -
I will never understand why my university is requiring me to take upper level physics. I understand the need to understand electricity and circuitry but this semester has been mostly quantum and I don't see how this will apply to development.9
-
So, I apply for a job and they send me an automated email with my username....and my pasword....in plain text...I should use a different password for my applications....4
-
Those EU cookie law notices COVERING UP the website so I have to click them and I'm not even in the EU so it doesn't apply here!2
-
So many Ideas... So many projects... And no energy to apply...
Gonna take a few days off my inventions, If i can... -
I have 2 rules as I apply to every internship, don't rewrite my entire resume or linkedin. And I'm not jumping through 20 hoops to get ghosted
-
Started getting into drawing to get it all out, thought some of you might find this humorous, given our strange nature.
Same rules apply as other social media. If this upsets you, insert a tampon and jog on.
14 -
Why apply to interviews if you don't wanna show up? I start feeling stupid because I showed up on time for your interview.
Please, please people; don't apply if you're not going to come; we have other things to do too...4 -
When you hate ur job so bad and secretly apply to a new one, do two interviews, then reduce 400$ from what u said ur expected salary was because youd rather die then use wordpress one more time.7
-
If our company wants to outsource us to other clients then why don't we just resign and directly work there instead!!!!
Seriously we apply here as developers not consultants/analysts/researchers2 -
Two days into the new year and you got made redundant after working there!
Yeah cheers for that! Could done it last year.
Guess it's back to apply for jobs.
/rantover1 -
Anyone run into the HR app called taleo when applying for jobs? It is so bad. Apparently each company has a different database so you have to re-enter all of your employment info each time you apply for a job at a company that uses taleo. Unless desperate I don't apply for jobs that use taleo.3
-
Writing ugly code should be a capital offence. And oh, I should be the sole judge of what is an ugly code or not.
No, this punishment won’t apply to me, thanks for asking.5 -
I know you're not supposed to "spray and pray" when applying for jobs but I find it therapeutic to spam those apply buttons. Also job ads have become so long that I apply and only read them if I'm accepted for an interview.6
-
When you apply to a job and almost, but not quite, have all the skills needed.
Whelp! Time to get my Google on! -
I just received this.
"I'm just saying that one should be proud to be able to import libraries and call themselves Data Scientist who can apply machine learning."
What the actual fuck.6 -
When you go to apply to a web design company and they have this exact bootstrap layout http://adventurega.me/bootstrap/
A company that designs websites can't make itself one?!?2 -
Ever apply for a dev job in an industry you really wanna be jn even though you know you aren’t very qualified for the job? How’d that go for you?8
-
Meeting room pc with windows 7 switched on once a week. Sometime it says at boot that has to apply 32769 updates.
Everytime an heart attack.
Fortunately it takes only a couple of minutes.
-
So my phone got stolen last night. FOR FUCK SAKE. I scrape together enough money to get another cheap phone after the last one broke, and now I need YET ANOTHER ONE WHEN I HAVEN'T GOT A JOB AND CAN'T APPLY FOR ONE WITHOUT ARGRFHUJGHIOSDJGBH:USKDGHISD:1
-
What would be your answer to this question? My answer was closing the tab and promising myself to never apply there again.
4 -
Dear recruiters just because I apply to a specific job online (dice) does not mean I want to be called about jobs in ducky places I would never relocate or in the town I would like to move from.1
-
For all you chuckleheads that think the government will save us with a UBI and other free shit, consider that when I went to apply for unemployment, I got this message: "This website is designed to work with Internet Explorer version 8 and 9, Apple Safari version 4 and 5 or Mozilla Firefox version 16 and 17." Also, the website is mysteriously unable to allow you to apply for unemployment on any day other than Monday through Friday and at any time other than 8 am-5 pm. Those computers the government has have better time off constraints than I do!5
-
If you apply for a job advertising 35,000-45,000 and get offered 26,000 how would you handle it? If you meet the requirements and pass there test.15
-
Can I have some experience so I can get experience to apply for jobs that require experience please?6
-
Helped my electronics teacher with a basic MATLAB code in beginning of the semester, she awarded extra 2 marks at the end to acknowledge it.
All I did was google the error and apply fix according to first link.😂😂1 -
Job description of an internship. They want me to know react framework in Java. I am going to apply anyway coz i'm desperate for a job.
3 -
Introducing the new: Sideproject finisher! You asked for it, DevRant, and unlike you - we finished it!
Instructions:
1. Load chamber with single bullet
2. Apply directly to the forehead
3. Commit- something you should have done more of before you came to this5 -
Today I saw a 200-line function named Apply and a 200-line function with different code, but does the same, named TryAgain...1
-
Email: "Thanks for applying to this position, after you complete this technical test, please let us know via email."
Me: Dude! I didn't even apply for that position, stop spamming 😒3 -
that moment when you apply for an internship and they ask you to develop for both android and ios, and now you feel bad for laughing at xamarin1
-
Question for all Dev..
I recently apply for a front-end dev and I got rejected. I than apply to many other jobs offer for the same position and got rejected. This is really putting me down and disencouraging me to continue (but I know it shouldn't) I just want to know if anyone else went through or is going through the same thing and how did you find the strength to stay positive. How many times did you get rejected before actually finding a job? And how many times people have told you no? This goes for freelancer and business.15 -
All results for GDPR on my "spam mail adress" (NO results for DSGVO!) ... seems like GDPR doesnt apply for spam :D but this email is also registered to sooo many services and websites... i think the search is broken :|
5 -
Hey,
Any tips on how to apply for job, I apply to 10-15 new opportunities daily but haven't received positive response from 99% of them. I don't know what's wrong.
Currently, I am a cyber security analyst at a startup since February 2023.
My resume I use to apply for job
https://ganofins.com/ganesh-bagaria...21 -
Need some advice. I'm 19, working on my own fintech startup. Should I apply to Ycombinator or finish high school first? The prototype is basically ready, but the Winter 2018 YC is taking place while I have school. What should I do?8
-
Not going insane due to lack of documentation.
In retrospect it may have been that I was still learning to properly apply and read docs so eh.3 -
I am in 3rd year of my college and I am a bit worried.
How you people apply for jobs? Do you just walk in a company and talk to the receptionist or.....?7 -
SwiftKey made all their keyboard themes free for good! Time for us to get and apply this theme on our devices :D
10 -
The new twitter developer stuff is SHIT.
I need to apply now for my small app I use wanted to build this evening as an automation site project. Can't you cunts just give me access to this api so I can finish my projects.
How the fuck should I describe in 300 characters THAT I WILL BE TWEETING ONE TWEET PER WEEK NOTIFYING ABOUT A NEW EPISODE.
Now I need to fill 80 more characters with some dumb stuff just to be able to apply.....5 -
Found a job posting that says the company was founded as a "Christian" company. They say that it means that they have high ethical standards, but . . . yeah.
Wondering if I should apply since it's a remote gig.6 -
Getting back into job hunting and job interviews after 2 years of employment is like going back to dating after being married for 5 years.
It feels weird and I'm worried I might be too forward on the questions. But I like how easy to apply for jobs now. Easy one-click apply from my LinkedIn account. Not sure if I should apply for startups or not -
We've introduced an official coding style at my work, which is great. Visual Studio will even alert us when code isn't up to snuff.
What Microsoft didn't think to do was let me automatically apply naming conventions across entire solutions or even just projects. I got to spend a few hours today manually going through hundreds of files and and applying the style guide.
I can automatically apply brace style across an entire solution, why won't you let me do the same with naming conventions?! A few hours down, a few more to go.6 -
Alright, if you don't make apply a little feature, which you already use in your webpage, in your API, I'll have to fucking parse that shit.
Screw you, I'm sacrificing my free time... -
Tired to find out how to apply for an MNC Internship ?
Well, you can find the solution in the attachment below:
Remember : - Always keep it simple and genuine .
P.s. - This is real one .
Don't forget to ++ it .
7 -
Me: Spends 4 hours configuring my new IDE
Me: Hovers Apply for the last apply
IDE: Crashes
Ne: Reopen IDE, not worried as I applied and saved multiple times during setup
IDE,: Totally zero'ed EVERY SINGLE SETTING...
Me: Googles alternatives to X -
Spent a couple of hours trying to figure out why my flexbox css wasn't rendering as suspected. Finally discovered that the html tag I tried to apply it to didn't support display: flex;
Gah.3 -
I'm absolutely fuming why on earth would someone try to apply exactly all rules of a theoretical concept. I hate those so called "scrum masters". We can't apply all rules of agile we're not machines. There's real life and theory.1
-
Does gradient descent in artificial neural networks apply the most changes closest to the input layer?6
-
so in order for me to be able to design a theme for a samsung phone, I have to apply and it has to become public after? what?
https://developer.samsung.com/theme
the fk2 -
MICROSOFT WHY THE FUCK I NEED TO WAIT FOR ETERNITY FOR YOUR PIECE OF SHIT MYCROFTHOLMES FUCKFICE -2007 SHITSTALLER TO APPLY UPDATES
-
- Applied for a job at campus interview
- Got selected (yay)
- Turns out it's a BPO service center
Another opportunity will come, till then I'll apply for the paid PHP Internship. -
Anyone else around here apply for the Google winter 2017 internship? Does anyone know how long they take to respond? I'm excited and anxious! :) Been studying hard to get this internship!
-
The condition of software development in 2019: “Please don’t apply if you don’t have the core concepts of programming, and you depend upon copying and pasting the code from StackOverflow/saved file.”2
-
Citizens of Belarus, China, Egypt, Hong Kong, Iran, Libya, Macau, North Korea, Russia, Syria, Taiwan, Ukraine, and Vietnam can’t enter British Ascension Island.
Vietnamese citizens can’t ever apply for Green Card.3 -
Never apply for a job that has been posted in stackoverflow.
(Oh! And never work in stackoverflow, too!)1 -
Expanding a batch system on production
Set reservation to block the new nodes
Apply changes and restarted scheduler
(Reservation quietly lost, as it should persist)
Client called because jobs start to fail on new nodes…
Gahhhhhhh!!!!!! -
Saw a good privacy movie on Netflix last night. It's called "Terms and Conditions May Apply", it's from 2013. Like most good documentaries I felt bad about myself afterward. Oh yeah, he grills Zuckerberg pretty good out of nowhere. That was funny.
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Why is it that software engineers seem to get so little respect?
This does not apply to everyone but I have experienced this.13 -
I get all the time shouts by boss that I don't test the application, if he doesn't have testing team does it apply on me programmer to test everything?4
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Got rejected for an UX designer position turns out they were realy looking for a UX tester with project leadership skills 🤗 does that even mix bro???
Note to self 🤔 never apply for jobs there in the future 🤔1 -
Two reviewers two comments on the same content, both comments conflict with each other and I'm required to apply both, how exactly?2
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implementing "standards" and "code review" the way "managers" want by reading stuff from a book and forcing us to apply it in real world.... their reply when we have questions that they cant answer... "the book says so"
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When did you last shut down your linux system? Mine, apparently was on June 20th, would have done to apply some system updates. (This is my personal system and not a dedicated server)
1 -
I can't stress this enough: Fuck Workday as an ATS. Nobody wants to create a new Workday account with a new password for every company that they want to apply to. Like which moron PM at Workday thought this was a good idea? Not to mention Workday's terrible resume parser, which requires you to essentially manually enter your entire resume because the parser only picks up the first word of each job description on your resume (and even then it puts that one word in the wrong field.)
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Currently installing Nginx in my OS X via Homebrew. Hope this goes all well + adding of HTTPS in it. Then will study nginx configurations. After all that, I will apply it to Laradock. Push! Excited for this! 💪 😎 🤜
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Confucius - "Study the past, if you would divine the future"
This also apply to many things in life. -
So I'm noticing when I'm looking at places to apply, for example let's say discord, uses JavaScript, Python, C++,etc. How do they use multiple languages for one program? It's so confusing for me to understand8
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!dev
can someone recommend a free 3d modelling software to create printable stl-files for mechanical technical devices? i am not experienced with cad and freedcad gave me a hard time to start with.
educational or commercial use both can apply.3 -
I have an idea to request an icon to FontAwesome project then I went to their github project and found this: https://github.com/FortAwesome/...
It's over a year, hope FA team apply the update -
Figured I’d just apply for a job in Munich (i’m belgian), didn’t think anything would come of it and now they want a skype interview with me and i have absolutely no clue of what to expect from skype interviews6
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String s = "Rant";
boolean b = true;
if (s != b) {
System.out.println ("Sometimes i hate LinkedIn, so many recruiters or companies have meaningless descriptions.. why should i even apply for a job, if they don't describe their offers, specs and so on"
}4 -
I know it doesn't really apply because we have widescreen monitors now, but regardless, I hate seeing code that runs the width of the screen, I'd much rather have more lines than more columns. Viva la vertical!5
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Why is it so common for people to insist on following particular patterns at PR when they have no concept of why the pattern originated or when and why it should apply?9
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This *is* a question you silly wrong tagging mother fucker, how dare you doubt me?
Alright, no more disclaimer: I like dungeons and dragons, but it's too fucking much in terms of rules and systems and shit, as in just *making* a character can take a long ass while.
And if that's the highest level of all your ANAL preferences then OK, but I'm not you and things only come OUT of my ass, not inwards, I swear.
Anyhoo, I got fed up with it and wrote my own ruleset and setting as a last fuck you to everyone. It's very simple: if you want to be some kinky magical alien hermaphrodite royal prostitute half sewer dragon princess and three quarters bearded female incest child of demons and fairies then FINE, but you get no bonuses for that shit.
Get it? No complex racial level scaling bullshit, FUCK YOU, race and background is just for vibes, end of story.
You get no attribute or skills or shit to distribute on level one. All you get is a prompt: pick three actions, that's it. You wanna be sexy? Pick "seduce". You wanna set turds on fire? Pick "ignite". Are you an edge lord? Pick "summon". Would you be my wife? Pick "heal", "buff" and "smite".
The game is turn based, and each action you can take is effectively a spell. Everyone can cast a basic spell like walk, attack, talk, crouch, etcetera -- that costs no mana. Special crap like flying and firing fucking electricity costs mana, and you can only do those if you either picked the spell on level one or learnt it later from a book/tutor/demonic bargain/whatever.
Which spells are valid for taking at level one is up to the game master; I just tell people to pick three verbs or short sentences, and if they choose something that's too broken like "split the Red Sea" I'm like nah you're not Moses, try again.
Still with me? Good. You get eight points of health, four points of mana, and one point of stamina. They're all energy, and you can use it to power your magery, but spending all your health means you fucking die.
Stamina recharges fully every turn, and is used for the aforementioned basic actions. All of these cost one point of stamina each. If you run out of stamina, you can use mana. Or your BLOOD.
Level one spells cost one mana, level two cost two and so on. You get back one point of mana each turn, and you can fire all the spells you want during it, long as you have mana. Or BLOOD.
That's good and all, but if you spend anywhere over eleven combined points of energy in one go, you spontaneously combust and die, erasing all signs of life in a twenty-meter radius. This is called incineration, and it *will* leave behind a blackened crater from which the dark servants of the Horror Immemorial may or may not crawl out of.
In case you didn't guess by now, your blood doesn't fucking come back unless you eat, sleep or see a healer.
But anyway, the more points you spend into casting a spell -- and remember, basic attack counts as a spell -- the more powerful it is, so the bigger your diceroll can get. My rule is I add one dice for every fourth point of energy spent, so (1d4), (1d4 + 1d6), (1d4 + 1d6 + 1d8), incineration.
Additionally, for every three points of energy spent, your spell can hit one more target. That's right, you like AoE? Then spend more mana, bitch. Oh, and if you're using shit like poison it lasts one more turn for every two points of energy spent.
How do we calculate damage? Diceroll over two and fuck your mother. Armor class? Resistances? Out of my face with that shit. Damage reduction is called "tyranny" and is for dungeon bosses only.
If you live long enough to get to level two, you *do* get attributes. Pick:
- Grit: +2 health, +1 to fighter shit type rolls.
- Cunning: +2 mana, +1 to rogue shit type rolls.
- Allure: +1 stamina, +2 to wizard shit type rolls.
- Spirit: +1 to elemental shit type spells.
- Faith: +1 to benefactor paragon asshole shit type spells.
- Hatred: +1 to demonic murder hobo destructive shit type spells.
On second level, you can pick one of the spells you know to get +1 to it, specifically. Eh, "+1" just means you get a bonus to some diceroll, no time to explain I'm running out of characters what the fuck.
On level three, the cycle repeats. Pick attr, pick spell. DONE.
Oh right, and weapons. Mostly just vibes, pick your fancy and fuck off. Normally, you can hit things one tile away; if you have a BIG melee weapon you can hit from *two* tiles away, and if you have a ranged weapon you can shoot anyone in sight, but you need to spend one point of energy to reload.
And there, all bases covered in less that 5000 characters with some flair to spare, now suck my fucking cock Hasbro.
What was the question? Oh yeah right, I'm gonna GPL this shit and put it in browsers. I think I'm going to write it in Kotlin but I'm open to suggestions. Would you guys like to play it/contribute to it's development for shits and giggles?9 -
I spent half an hour writting all my studies down in a job looking site in order to apply for a job (apparently, a CV isn't enough), and when finally everything is done, apparently you need to PAY for premium in order to apply for certain jobs in that site? Are they actually serious?2
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Hey, guys do you think april is too late to apply for a year-long internship by a second year student :/2
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Any idea how to run ASI loaders for games like Mafia or GTA San Andreas via Wine? (Especially Mafia, cuz I wanna apply widescreen fix)6
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hey guys I am here for some advice so I am passed out 2 months ago from my university and I haven't found any job yet. I have hands-on experience with many technology but most of the job requirements need 2-3 years of experience so how can I find a good job or should I apply at such company even though I don't have any experience actually I have 6 month internship. or should I apply only to those company that need 0 years experience developer4
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I'm graduating on Computer Engineering and I'm JavaScript. It still bugs me that I understand the language but then I can't apply the knowledge on code :/3
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If you have 10 years experience in php and apply a JavaScript role with 3 month non commercial experience. You are a junior dev or intern. At least from employee's view3
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I have an interview later this week. Hit me with some unusual non-technical interview questions, so that I've seen them and can prepare. ;)
"What is your greatest weakness" need not apply.12 -
Obviously the concept of right and wrong don't apply here
Trying to take care of my health is not wrong especially when the problem is due to negligence on behalf of other people.3 -
Hello, I am currently taking BS Computer Science and for this semester we are required to take a subject on Discrete Mathematics (logic).
My question is, how can I apply this knowledge in programming?
thanksss12 -
!rant
What you guys do on Sundays? Saturdays I pay the bills, run some errands and study.
Sundays I wish I has something to apply muy mind to, other than code.
Any recomendations?9 -
Aaaand yet another assignment that’s probably too technical for my monkey brains. I’ll just apply at the postoffice1
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excel just apply my formula to rows without empty data
yes i know there's over 100 thousand rows
pls1 -
Just to piss off people some more.
Since everything applies across industries.
How could design patterns apply to non software industries?4 -
I think the instructions for the holy hand grenade could also apply to the amount of indentation:
https://youtu.be/xOrgLj9lOwk?t=851 -
Maybe more specifically/realistically… i need a dev with data science experience that is also as optimistically psychotic as I am… I got wicked ambition. (Just make sure you can apply clear hermeneutic transparency to your math confined programmer brain)5
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I'm currently searching for an internship in ireland.
May you know a company where I should apply.
Sure I will search for my own...7 -
!rant
Guys! What the f? This guy got scolded this way because he apply leave to his own wedding! https://facebook.com/19661117407374...24 -
Should I apply for jobs (I'm an iOS developer) while attending college? knowing that I already had like 3 months of professional experience working for a company and I could work in holidays completing the full time working hours2
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Say you'd have a dev apply for a job after only 6 months into his previous job, what would be your thoughts on that?
Would you outright reject the applicant? If not, wwyd?6 -
What’s a practical use case of the ES6 spread operator? I’m pretty fresh and would just like to see a real world example where you would need to destructure some array values and apply them to function Params.3
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In the way of learning java if you learn new concepts but not able to apply to you code how you deal with this type of new concepts
7 -
Do you think you should apply for a job you are probably not ready for to get work experience or wait till you get experience with learning?
Notes (small company, I am a student)
Please help me with this7 -
Spent two hours trying to work out why a Kubernetes pod wouldn't apply it's database migration when it works in every other environment. Turns out the database instance was powered off. Piss biscuits.
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Could any dev here explain how do u apply SVM to HOG features? I know what HOG features are but cannot for the life of me figure out how the hell to use them in an SVM -_-2
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Confusion is i know AngularJs, VueJS and ReactJs but i am not a frontend developer
who does CSS,LESS,SCSS ..
Always in doubt should i apply or not ...1 -
I don't understand when applying for job .. companies just post their product .. ask for improvements, bugs etc, :( Do I need to look over that I just skipped that types of jobs . Is this worth it to study their product and then apply ?3
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Javascript life sucks, I use javascript everywhere even though I know a little go. life sucks on this side of the valley I think I'll learn some python just so I can apply for jobs.1
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Anyone know if we still can apply to We Are Developers 2018 as a volunteer? Can't find option to apply on their site :/
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What is the possibility of getting a job at Google right after finishing university? Is it doable, or not really? Should I apply?2
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What do you think about Samsung device list for latest android version support? it doesn't apply to my Galaxy S5... yeah I know Rooting is an option, but officially? never? are we stucked at that version?1
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"Webpack not working if its Monday"
https://github.com/JeffreyWay/...
I don't see the issue here? Not working on Monday is completely expected behavior, at least for humans. Why shouldn't this apply to software? -
What is better for a Junior position front end or backend? I like both and I don't want to apply to full stack positions cause it's exhaustive and salary not worth it and not good as a starting point for a dev journey.14
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!rant
I'm just a beginner with CSS, nodejs, sass and whatsoever. Also I really enjoy writing my docs with Markdown, so I decided to make an effort and create a project that aims to create an easy-to-use and easy-to-apply Markdown themes, that can be customized.
I know that this may be horrible code, but If someone can point me in a good direction, I'd be glad to learn and apply it.
https://github.com/apexJCL/...1 -
Having trouble getting CSS to apply to a table in react. Thought I'd ask here. You guys are probably better than SO. Please and thank you
https://stackoverflow.com/questions...7 -
I guess the whole "can work from anywhere!" mantra doesn't apply to those looking at junior positions. I wonder how the industry will handle the lack of new hires coming through as more and more seniors demand WFH accommodations.3
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I really want to apply at magic.dev, but I'm not sure it's the right career move right now.
The work is way more interesting than what I'm doing.
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