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Search - "catch all"
-
After listening to two of our senior devs play ping pong with a new member of our team for TWO DAYS!
DevA: "Try this.."
Junior: "Didn't work"
DevB: "Try that .."
Junior: "Still not working"
I ask..
Me:"What is the problem?"
Few ums...uhs..awkward seconds of silence
Junior: "App is really slow. Takes several seconds to launch and searching either crashes or takes a really long time."
DevA: "We've isolated the issue with Entity Framework. That application was written back when we used VS2010. Since that application isn't used very often, no one has had to update it since."
DevB: "Weird part is the app takes up over 3 gigs of ram. Its obviously a caching issue. We might have to open up a ticket with Microsoft."
Me: "Or remove EF and use ADO."
DevB: "That would be way too much work. The app is supposed to be fully deprecated and replaced this year."
Me: "Three of you for the past two days seems like a lot of work. If EF is the problem, you remove EF."
DevA: "The solution is way too complicated for that. There are 5 projects and 3 of those have circular dependencies. Its a mess."
DevB: "No fracking kidding...if it were written correctly the first time. There aren't even any fracking tests."
Me:"Pretty sure there are only two tables involved, maybe 3 stored procedures. A simple CRUD app like this should be fairly straight forward."
DevB: "Can't re-write the application, company won't allow it. A redesign of this magnitute could take months. If we can't fix the LINQ query, we'll going to have the DBAs change the structures to make the application faster. I don't see any other way."
Holy frack...he didn't just say that.
Over my lunch hour, I strip down the WPF application to the basics (too much to write about, but the included projects only had one or two files), and created an integration test for refactoring the data access to use ADO. After all the tests and EF removed, the app starts up instantly and searches are also instant. Didn't click through all the UI, but the basics worked.
Sat with Junior, pointed out my changes (the 'why' behind the 'what') ...and he how he could write unit tests around the ViewModel behavior in the UI (and making any changes to the data access as needed).
Today's standup:
Junior: "Employee app is fixed. Had some help removing Entity Framework and how it starts up fast and and searches are instant. Going to write unit tests today to verify the UI behaivor. I'll be able to deploy the application tomorrow."
DevA: "What?! No way! You did all that yesterday?"
Me: "I removed the Entity Framework over my lunch hour. Like I said, its basic CRUD and mostly in stored procedures. All the data points are covered by integration tests, but didn't have time for the unit tests. It's likely I broke some UI behavior, but the unit tests should catch those."
DevB: "I was going to do that today. I knew taking out Entity Framework wouldn't be a big deal."
Holy fracking frack. You fracking lying SOB. Deeeep breath...ahhh...thanks devRant. Flame thrower event diverted.13 -
So they were having trouble with the server always being slow and maxed to 100%, so the boss told me when wait times were hitting 5+mins due to server trying to catch up, he complained at me, said if I could get the wait time to 30sec to instant he would raise my pay to 90k a year, then walked away after I agreed, I was quite serious but I don't think he thought I was, so I decided to look over the system, IDK who but they put all the calculations and processing server-side for the CA's on floor then sent the completed view to the CA, so I spent months recreating the entire system except the server only pulled the data needed then the new client would do all the processing on their computer since they weren't doing anything anyways, I did a practice run today as its one of our peak days, wait times went to barely 5secs or "instant" according to CA's, I walked into the office, slapped that hourly report down after just two hours and showed the massive increase in employees production times.
That look on his face...
That look on my face...
That look on my next check...
Bliss10 -
A couple of years ago, I was working in a computer shop as a "technician", I was 15, first job I ever had.
One day an elderly lady came into the shop, probably 50'ish, she and her whole family "suffered" from electromagnetic radiation, and the mother had the worst suffering. She complained about her TV box that just had died.
I accept the tuner and see it's wrapped with 10 layers of aluminium foil, with a tiny hole for the IR receiver.
The whole box smells like burnt electronics, and the foil gets darker for each layer I unwrap. I try explain to her that the box gets warm and overheated by wrapping it like this, and she's lucky that it didn't catch fire.
I further explain to her that she will not get a new box, because the warranty does not cover _this_. The mother tells me she has to wrap it like this, because she gets headaches when she's watching the news.
She then proceeds to go into a rage mode and gets her whole family into the shop, where all of them starts yelling at me, the younger kids start throwing stuff down from the shelves and touching the TVs with sticky fingers (literally, sticky, like yuck!).
Unsure what to do, boss is in a meeting, and my colleague is busy in the back.
So I calmly tell them that in this building there's 4 wireless networks, 3 wireless phones, high voltage cables run in the wall behind me, there's factory tracks 20 meters behind the building, next door business is an electrician, you're standing in front of wall with 30-40 TVs, 5 HDMI splitters, 3 TV boxes and a Blu-ray player. And they've all been standing in front of them for the last 10 minutes.
They all suddenly feel really sick and run out of the store, never to be seen again. From that day, I decided I'll never work in a shop again, and pursued my dreams to become a developer.
TL;DR: Family is "sensitive" to electromagnetic radiation, almost put burnt down their house because of stupidity, yelled at me. I decided to pursue my dream as a developer.16 -
Waiting for a bus. And there is a 14 year old smoking and looking after 3 10 year olds. She then gets them to role her 'fags' and then they all smoke. They are blaring rap from a speaker I'm annoyed everyone is annoyed.
They get on a bus full of elderly people.
Then I have my moment. I hear they are switching phone that the speaker is paired to, for different music. They even say the device name! I quickly get my phone search Bluetooth devices and pair. I connected all I could think was play the tweenies. And so I did.
They have hysterics of laughter, but I try act neutral containing my laughter. They keep saying they can't connect and that it's not their music. This went on for 10 or so minutes of them turning volume up and down. Until they catch on someone else is paired to it. I turn off my Bluetooth and get off the bus, you are welcome society.12 -
Did this on my first programming exam.
int index = 0
int value = 0
try {
while true {
value += array[index]
index++
}
} catch NullPointerException {
System.out.print("Sum: " + value)
}
The task was to add together all numbers in an array.
I somehow aced the exam, but got called in to teachers office this is not the way to use exceptions.7 -
0. Plan before you code. Document everything. You won't remember either your idea or those clever implementations next week (or next month, or next year...).
1. Don't hack your way through, unless that's what you intend to do. Name your variables, functions etc. neatly: autocomplete exists!
Protip: Sometimes you want to check a quick language feature or a piece of code from one of your modules. Resist the urge to quickly hack in the test into your actual project. Maintain a separate file where you can quickly type in and check what you're looking for without hacking on your project (For example, in Python, you can open a new terminal or IDLE window for those quick tests).
2. Keep a quiet environment where you can focus. Recommend listening to something while coding (my latest fad is on asoftmurmur.com). Don't let anything distract you and throw your contextual awareness out of whack.
3. Rubber ducks work. Really. Talking out a complex piece of logic, or that regex or SQL query aids your mind greatly in grasping the concept and clearing the idea. Bounce off code and ideas with a friend or colleague to catch errors and oversights faster. Read more here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
4. Since everyone else is saying this (and because it merits saying), USE VERSION CONTROL. Singular most important thing to software development aside from planning and documenting.
5. Remember to flout all of the above once in a while and just make a mess of a project where you have fun throwing everything around all over the place. You'll make mistakes that you never thought were possible by someone of your caliber :) That's how you learn.
Have fun, keep learning!3 -
A wild Darwin Award nominee appears.
Background: Admins report that a legacy nightly update process isn't working. Ticket actually states problem is obviously in "the codes."
Scene: Meeting with about 20 people to triage the issue (blamestorming)
"Senior" Admin: "update process not working, the file is not present"
Moi: "which file?"
SAdmin: "file that is in ticket, EPN-1003"
Moi: "..." *grumbles, plans murder, opens ticket*
...
Moi: "The config dotfile is missing?"
SAdmin: "Yes, file no there. Can you fix?"
Moi: "Engineers don't have access to the production system. Please share your screen"
SAdmin: "ok"
*time passes, screen appears*
Moi: "ls the configuration dir"
SAdmin: *fails in bash* > ls
*computer prints*
> ls
_.legacyjobrc
Moi: *sees issues, blood pressure rises* "Please run list all long"
SAdmin: *fails in bash, again* > ls ?
Moi: *shakes* "ls -la"
SAdmin: *shonorable mention* > ls -la
*computer prints*
> ls -la
total 1300
drwxrwxrwx- 18 SAdmin {Today} -- _.legacyjobrc
Moi: "Why did you rename the config file?"
SAdmin: "Nothing changed"
Moi: "... are you sure?"
SAdmin: "No, changed nothing."
Moi: "Is the job running as your account for some reason?"
SAdmin: "No, job is root"
Moi: *shares screenshot of previous ls* This suggests your account was likely used to rename the dotfile, did you share your account with anyone?
SAdmin: "No, I rename file because could not see"
Moi: *heavy seething* so, just to make sure I understand, you renamed a dotfile because you couldn't see it in the terminal with ls?
SAdmin: "No, I rename file because it was not visible, now is visible"
Moi: "and then you filed a ticket because the application stopped working after you renamed the configuration file? You didn't think there might be a correlation between those two things?"
SAdmin: "yes, it no work"
Interjecting Director: "How did no one catch this? Why were there no checks, and why is there no user interface to configure this application? When I was writing applications I cared about quality"
Moi: *heavy seething*
IDjit: "Well? Anyone? How are we going to fix this"
Moi: "The administrative team will need to rename the file back to its original name"
IDjit: "can't the engineering team do this?!"
Moi: "We could, but it's corporate policy that we have no access to those environments"
IDjit: "Ok, what caused this issue in the first place? How did it get this way?!"
TFW you think you've hit the bottom of idiocy barrel, and the director says, "hold my mango lassi."27 -
CEO hired graphics designer without HR help after first meeting and that person first day of his work borrowed money from people and that’s not end of story.
Same guy came back at night and robbed the workplace with his friends, didn’t came back to work. Company bought couple of big iMac for new graphics department back then, all gone.
When company reported incident to Police it turned out he travel and steal from companies all over the country and they’re trying to catch him for a year.11 -
New senior dev joined the project today.
Senior dev: "There's no way for me to test my changes before I merge this into develop"
Me: "Can you at least run our test suite?"
An hour later the develop branch is fucked and everyone who has merged it locally has pages of red errors splattered across their screens whenever they run any tests.
Start looking into what the fuck is going on.
Notice that all the errors are related to changes the new guy made.
Ask him if he ran the tests..
Senior dev: "Nah they wouldn't catch anything locally "
Stare at the stream of red text running down my screen.
Normally I wouldn't care but we were trying to prepare a release... RUN THE FUCKING TESTS ASSHOLE.9 -
My first day in a Linux admin and security course. I went all confident and cocky waiting for some bullshit like "type in your term: ls, cd, pwd, see you tomorrow"
Suddenly the teacher starts to configure lampp, then jumps to bind, and thirty minutes leater , when everyone has their ssl keys under control, I was still struggling to correctly forward my mate. The rest of the day was smooth and easy for those who finished their servers, and there I was, unable to find my own ass in the middle of that mess made of bad assigned permissions and wrong placed addresses. Even worse, he came to me when I asked for help, took my chair and fixed everything in one beautiful single bash line. I started to ask "what's this? Where is that? Is it a config file or a directory?" And with all his patience he keep telling me the obvious answers that where right there at the screen but I couldn't see. Took me two weeks to catch his pace, and another two weeks to understand fully his classes. He never said a word about my terrible first day (first couple weeks). When course finished, I saw he was going to teach a really hard security module, and I signed up without hesitate.6 -
Things have been a little too quiet on my side here, so its time for an exciting new series:
practiseSafeHex's new life as a manager.
Episode 1: Dealing with the new backend team
It's great to be back folks. Since our last series where we delved into the mind numbing idiocy of former colleagues, a lot has changed. I've moved to a new company and taken a step up as a Dev manager / Tech lead. Now I know what you are all thinking, sounds more dull and boring right? Well it wouldn't be a practiseSafeHex series if we weren't ...
<audience-shouting>
DEALING! ... WITH! ... IDIOTS!
</audience-shouting>
Bingo! so lets jump right in and kick us off with a good one.
So for the past few months i've been on an on-boarding / fact finding / figuring out this shit-storm, mission to understand more about what it is i'm suppose to do and how to do it. Last week, as part of this, I had the esteemed pleasure of meeting face to face with the remote backend team i've been working with. Lets rattle off a few facts to catch us all up:
- 8 hour time difference to me
- No documentation other than a non-maintained swagger doc
- Swagger is reporting errors and several of the input models are just `Type: String`
- The one model that seems accurate, has every property listed as optional, including what must be the primary key
- Properties go missing and get removed at the drop of a hat and we are never told.
- First email I sent them took 27 days to reply, my response to that hasn't been answered so far 31 days later (new record! way to go team, I knew we could do it!!!)
- I deal directly with 2 of them, the manager and the tech lead. Based on how things have gone so far, i've nick named them:
1) Ass
2) Hole
So lets look at some example of their work:
- I was trying to test the new backend, I saw no data in QA. They said it wouldn't show up until mid day their time, which is middle of the night for us. I said we need data in our timezone and I was told: a) "You don't understand how big this system is" (which is their new catch phrase) b) "Your timezone is not my concern"
- The whole org started testing 2 days later. The next day a member from each team was on a call and I was asked to give an update of how the testing was going on the mobile side. I said I was completely blocked because I can't get test data. Backend were asked to respond. They acknowledged they were aware, but that mobile don't understand how big the system is, and that the mobile team need to come up with ideas for the backend team, as to how mobile can test it. I said we can't do anything without test data, they said ... can you guess what? ... correct "you don't understand how big the system is"
- We eventually got something going and I noticed that only 1 of the 5 API changes due on their side was done. Opened tickets. 2 days later asked them for progress and was told that "new findings" always go to the bottom of the backlog, and they are busy with other things. I said these were suppose to be done days ago. They said you can't give us 2 days notice and expect everything done. I said the original ticket was opened a month a go *sends link* ......... *long silence* ...... "ok, but you don't understand how big the system is, this is a lot of work"
- We were on a call. Product was asking the backend manager (aka "Ass") a question about a slight upgrade to the new feature. While trying to talk, the tech lead (aka "Hole") kept cutting everyone off by saying loudly "but thats not in scope". The question was "is this possible in the future" and "how long would it take", coming from management and product development. Hole just kept saying "its not in scope", until he was told to be quiet by several people.
- An API was sending down JSON with a string containing a message for the user with 2 bits of data inside it. We asked for one of those pieces to also come down as a property as the string can change and we needed it client side. We got that. A few days later we found an edge case and asked for the second piece of data to be a property too. Now keep in mind, they clearly already have access to them in order to make the string. We were told "If you keep requesting changes like this, you are going to delay the release of the backend by up to 2 weeks"
Yes folks, there you have it, the most minuscule JSON modifications, can delay your release by up to 2 weeks ........ maybe I should just tell product, that they don't understand how big the app is, and claim we can't build it on our side? Seems to work for them
Thats all the time we have for today,
Tune in for more, where we'll be looking into such topics as:
- If god himself was an iOS developer ... not
- Why automate when you can spend all day doing it by hand
- Its more time-efficient to just give everything a story point of 5
- Why waste time replying to emails ... when you can do nothing instead
See you all next week,
practiseSafeHex13 -
A Geologist and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.1 -
Dev: I’m taking a vacation next week
Manager: Good you need a break! I’ve put together a list of tickets for you to action during vacation since you’ll mostly be free during that time
Dev: Do you know what vacation means?
Manager: Well I work during *my* vacation
Dev: You write non-answers to emails and interrupt devs with status questions that are easily answered by a single glance at the kanban board. Also, you’ve just assigned a month’s worth of storyboard points to me on my week long vacation. We’d get more work done if you didn’t “work” during your vacation.
Manager: Well it all needs to get done! It’s the only way we can catch up and get ahead of schedule.
Dev: Why do you exist again?15 -
I am bloody sick of being on my own.
I was the sole dev at the last few jobs I've held, with the exception of API Guy -- who didn't really help much, and who got fired / quit six months after I started. Every other job I've either been the only dev, or the only web dev. (Exception:My boss at my previous job was a Rails dev, but he has zero time to code, and was significantly less experiened so he could only rarely help anyway.)
But now I'm in a company with a bunch of other devs, and they're all ostensibly senior devs, so you'd think I should be able to ask questions, right? And get answers? that actually help? like "Hey, you built this; how does it work?" No bloody way.
So far every time I've asked someone for help, they've been incompetent. I asked about what a few flags did, and got an answer that basically said "you just gotta know. oh, and the labels aren't up to date, so don't trust what they say." I asked the head of the "product team" about a ticket that he wrote, and he changed what it meant four times within two days. I asked about another, and he said "oh, that isn't reproduceable." Thanks. I asked about mailers, and got two very different, very incompete walkthroughs from the more senior devs (9+ years on this codebase) that didn't help. I asked two people about how users and roles work, and still have no idea what kind of user (there are like twelve?) is what, what roles even exist, or how to check for permissions. `@current_user` is a thing, but idfk what it holds since that can change considerably, and there's an impersonation feature that changes how it works, too. I ask the product guy again about where to link something, and he has no idea. I ask said product guy about what this feature needs to do, and he doesn't know. I ask what the legal team needs, and i get nothing. I ask the designer where the goddamn CSS lives, and he doesn't know; he apparently just puts it wherever he feels like, even if it's a completely unrelated stylesheet. As long as it works, right?
I ask very simple and straighforward questions, and it takes them forever to get back to me saying what amounts to "idk, ask someone else."
This feels like the same crap all over again, except now there are a bunch of devs I can ask that give me basically the same answers as the sales people always did. Always "idk" or a confusing mess of an 'answer' that skips most/all of the important bits. At least these people don't [usually] contradict themselves.
So, @Root is all alone, again.
And currounded by incompetence.
Again.
For fuck's sake.
Can't I catch a break?19 -
I've got a mini stroke today. My project ended and I got delegated elsewhere.
"It's going to be fine, it's c++, you will find yourself there"
Suspicious, it's a project everybody was staying out of as hard as they can. But hey, it's cool, how bad can it be? what can go wrong with that?
Reality was brutal, project that uses Boost C++ as framework and bjam as builder. Builds with a decent dose of luck, and only under special circumstances, only under one specific version of compiler. No docs, quartet of the code is in Fortran, just to use ancient lisp part which was second qarter. The most senior Dev around does not have idea how it all works. Also everything is inside one enormous try/catch block. Because of the reasons.
That's how people end up with severe alcoholism and meth addiction.8 -
That awesome feeling of closing all the tabs after debugging a server for 32 hours with no sleep.
By now i've seen ~40 of the 220 blue screen codes that windows has available...
Gotta catch em all!2 -
Actual rant time. And oh boy, is it pissy.
If you've read my posts, you've caught glimpses of this struggle. And it's come to quite a head.
First off, let it be known that WINDOWS Boot Manager ate GRUB, not the other way around. Windows was the instigator here. And when I reinstalled GRUB, Windows threw a tantrum and won't boot anymore. I went through every obvious fix, everything tech support would ever think of, before I called them. I just got this laptop this week, so it must be in warranty, right? Wrong. The reseller only accepts it unopened, and the manufacturer only covers hardware issues. I found this after screaming past a pretty idiotic 'customer representative' ("Thank you for answering basic questions. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for repeating obvious information I didn't catch the first three times you said it. Thank you for letting me follow my script." For real. Are you tech support, or emotional support? You sound like a middle school counselor.) to an xkcd-shibboleth type 'advanced support'. All of this only to be told, "No, you can't fix it yourself, because we won't give you the license key YOU already bought with the computer." And we already know there's no way Microsoft is going to swoop in and save the day. It's their product that's so faulty in the first place. (Debian is perfectly fine.)
So I found a hidden partition with a single file called 'Image' and I'm currently researching how to reverse-engineer WIM and SWM files to basically replicate Dell's manufacturing process because they won't take it back even to do a simple factory reset and send it right back.
What the fuck, Dell.
As for you, Microsoft, you're going to make it so difficult to use your shit product that I have to choose between an arduous, dangerous, and likely illegal process to reclaim what I ALREADY BOUGHT, or just _not use_ a license key? (Which, there's no penalty for that.) Why am I going so far out of my way to legitimize myself to you, when you're probably selling backdoors and private data of mine anyway? Why do I owe you anything?
Oh, right. Because I couldn't get Fallout 3 to run in Wine. Because the game industry follows money, not common sense. Because you marketed upon idiocy and cheapness and won a global share.
Fuck you. Fuck everything. Gah.
VS Code is pretty good, though.20 -
Last week I almost lost my belief in everything..
A friend of minde, he's currently learning programming (Delphi 😂) in some kind of university, just told me:
"Hey, why do you spend so much time caring about error handling? I just surround all my programs with one try catch block and I never have to think about errors!"
Ehm. No statement needed, right?2 -
My first experience with Swift ended in me infecting myself with a virus (kinda). I wanted to create a macOS app that would listen for a global key event, catch it and then type a word.
During development I set it up to listen for ANY key event and to type "BALLS". So what happened? I compiled the code, everything looked good, I started the app and pressed a key which emitted a key event. The event was caught by my app and it typed "BALLS", just as expected. However, the typing of the word caused a NEW key event to be emitted, which the app also caught. The infinite loop was a fact. FUCK!
I tried closing down XCode but all I could see was "BALLS BALLS BALLS" everywhere. I tried everything I knew but it just kept typing "BALLS". I had to hold down my power button to make it stop.
I finally finished the app (which I named "The Balls App", I kept the word "BALLS"). I solved this issue by only listening for KeyUp and when emitting the "BALLS" word I just used KeyDown.7 -
Alias coworker = high school classmate
This kid wore a trench coat to school every single day and I guess he had a chronic masturbation problem because the guy was caught 3 different times IN CLASS jerking off.
Most people would catch a sexual harassment / indecent exposure / public masturbation charge, but this kid was breaking all these national math competition records and was working with a local university doing research and had a 4.5+ GPA (in high school in U.S. that's possible) so the school decided to do 2 things.
1. Not punish the kid, and in fact nothing of this was ever put on any record at all.
2. Write him a note from school administrators saying that this student can leave class whenever he would like no questions asked, and that the teacher must notify the office so they could send a security guard in order for this masturbation obsessed student to literally occupy a bathroom as his jerk off chamber uninterrupted.
So if in the past 6-7 years you've been in a high caliber university studying computer science and there was a kid in a trench coat "feeding some geese" near you, you can thank my high school.6 -
Radio Shack store closed near my house. Had a huge fire sale. Electric circuit components were 90% off.
My wife thought I'd gone insane when I got home with two huge bags full of LEDs, resistors, switches, IR sensors, photocells, capacitors, bridge rectifiers, a spare breadboard, a pair of helping hands, etc.
My only regret is that I didn't catch the fire sale in time to grab all their Arduinos.3 -
Hello, world!
Hey, it's me. It's been awhile. How have you been..? :3
For those of you who don't know/remember, I'm the lead developer of a Desktop and (to-be) Hacking Simulator Game. My project should still exist somewhere on here. I just thought I would hop on, and catch you guys up on my progress. ^~^
So far themes are a thing! You can add custom fonts, wallpapers(or just a desktop color) and set the color/opasity of everything in-game!
I have also implimented a modding API. It's under-documented, but it works very well! You can add apps, commands, or even redesign the entire interface using it. It executes modded functions on specific events, so you could really have it do anything.
As of yesterday, there is also a simulated FileSystem. You can navigate it using in-game terminal commands, and you can create and remove directories.
(in-game screenshots are also a thing, you can even set a timer - ps: this is a 100% mod! As are all apps and commands in the current unreleased version. PM me on Telegram @TheCyaniteproject to get a copy~)28 -
"Errors? Won't happen to me!"
One of my first jobs was to finish and maintain a program, that was made by a guy who had a real genius image among others. Years later, people said "oh him, that smart guy."
I never met him, but that's what i heard.
However, he was not only smart, but it seems he was also very confident. That's what i deduct from his code.
He didn't use catch-blocks. They were all empty. Not even logged.
If errors appeared , it was not possible to see what happened and where and why. The program would continue it's execution and if following steps could not work, because there had been an unnoticed exception, it would just throw another unnoticed exception and at some point, end in an undefined state.5 -
Why do Pokemon masters love JavaScript?
Because you gotta, try/catch them all
Haha. No laughs? Okay
*curls into a ball7 -
I wrote a database migration to add a column to a table and populated that column upon record creation.
But the code is so freaking convoluted that it took me four days of clawing my eyes out to manage this.
BUT IT'S FINALLY DONE.
FREAKING YAY.
Why so long, you ask? Just how convoluted could this possibly be? Follow my lead ~
There's an API to create a gift. (Possibly more; I have no bloody clue.)
I needed the mobile dev contractor to tell me which APIs he uses because there are lots of unused ones, and no reasoning to their naming, nor comments telling me what they do.
This API takes the supplied gift params, cherry-picks a few bits of useful data out (by passing both hashes by reference to several methods), replaces a couple of them with lookups / class instances (more pass-by-reference nonsense). After all of this, it logs the resulting (and very different) mess, and happily declares it the original supplied params. Utterly useless for basically everything, and so very wrong.
It then uses this data to call GiftSale#create, which returns an instance of GiftSale (that's actually a Gift; more on that soon).
GiftSale inherits from Gift, and redefines three of its methods.
GiftSale#create performs a lot of validations / data massaging, some by reference, some not. It uses `super` to call Gift#create which actually maps to the constructor Gift#initialize.
Gift#initialize calls Gift#pre_init (passing the data by reference again), which does nothing and returns null. But remember: GiftSale inherits from Gift, meaning GiftSale#pre_init supersedes Gift#pre_init, so that one is called instead. GiftSale#pre_init returns a Stripe charge object upon success, or a Gift (and a log entry containing '500 Internal') upon failure. But this is irrelevant because the return value is never actually used. Pass by reference, remember? I didn't.
We're now back at Gift#initialize, Rails finally creates a Gift object using the args modified [mostly] in-place by all of the above.
Another step back and we're at GiftSale#create again. This method returns either the shiny new Gift object or an error string (???), and the API logic branches on its type. For further confusion: not all of the method's returns are explicit, and those implicit return values are nested three levels deep. (In Ruby, a method will return the last executed line's return value automatically, allowing e.g. `def add(a,b); a+b; end`)
So, to summarize: GiftSale#create jumps back and forth between Gift five times before finally creating a Gift instance, and each jump further modifies the supplied params in-place.
Also. There are no rescue/catch blocks, meaning any issue with any of the above results in a 500. (A real 500, not a fake 500 like last time. A real 500, with tragic consequences.)
If you're having trouble following the above... yep! That's why it took FOUR FREAKING DAYS! I had no tests, no documentation, no already-built way of testing the API, and no idea what data to send it. especially considering it requires data from Stripe. It also requires an active session token + user data, and I likewise had no login API tests, documentation, logging, no idea how to create a user ... fucking hell, it's a mess.)
Also, and quite confusingly:
There's a class for GiftSale, but there's no table for it.
Gift and GiftSale are completely interchangeable except for their #create methods.
So, why does GiftSale exist?
I have no bloody idea.
All it seems to do is make everything far more complicated than it needs to be.
Anyway. My total commit?
Six lines.
IN FOUR FUCKING DAYS!
AHSKJGHALSKHGLKAHDSGJKASGH.7 -
A Geologist and a developer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the developer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Developer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Developer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Developer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Developer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the developer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The developer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the developer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the developer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.3 -
So... my girlfriend has a very random work schedule. Sometimes she works 4 days a week sometimes only 1, sometimes only at the weekend sometimes not at all. If only there would be an app to track that... 🤔
She tried quite a few apps on the app store but they were shit/ugly/too complex..etc
Wait.. i’m a developer, i can do that.
So i made a dead simple calendar-like app in javascript+fuseopen.
She selected the colors, background, layout etc..
If she taps on a date it turns red indicating that is a workday, if a workday is tapped it turns back to normal color.
The main logic is:
Main:
If(AppHasSavedWorkdays){
//check if save is current month
LoadCalendarWithWorkdays();
}else{
CreateEmptyCalendarAndSave();
}
She likes it.
Cool, so let’s build this! She has an iphone and my mac is still in the service center so i can’t build🙁
But its okay, i have a mac at my office, we can build there, the only downside is that is 40min of travel.
We take the subway, go to the office, build the app, make a certificate, install to her phone, everything goes as planned.
Coming back we were lucky enough to catch the bus that goes in 30 min intervals, we only had to wait like a minute so life is good 😃
I enter the house, chill down on the bed, pull out my laptop to close the project when a FUCK ME!!!!
I completely forgot to implement a whole else branch on start!!!
Soo the app does nothing when is opened on january 1😂😂
I guess that’s why we have testers and qa.. 😃8 -
Never thought I will be hired by Chinese software/hardware company located in NYC to code in languages I don't know so well. Instead of lying and saying I know everything about C, PHP and SQL, I said that I suck pretty much at everything, but I'm a quick learner and will study day and night to catch up with their practices. Now I see they have no regret about me, but I still suspect them in hiring me because there is another guy who is Russian too and we all communicate well. Our current squad is 17 Chinese, 2 Russians, 1 Americans. Guess what, I learn Mandarin quicker than PHP. Sometimes a small lie is OK, but sometimes honesty is better.3
-
I'm fixing a security exploit, and it's a goddamn mountain of fuckups.
First, some idiot (read: the legendary dev himself) decided to use a gem to do some basic fucking searching instead of writing a simple fucking query.
Second, security ... didn't just drop the ball, they shit on it and flushed it down the toilet. The gem in question allows users to search by FUCKING EVERYTHING on EVERY FUCKING TABLE IN THE DB using really nice tools, actually, that let you do fancy things like traverse all the internal associations to find the users table, then list all users whose password reset hashes begin with "a" then "ab" then "abc" ... Want to steal an account? Hell, want to automate stealing all accounts? Only takes a few hundred requests apiece! Oooh, there's CC data, too, and its encryption keys!
Third, the gem does actually allow whitelisting associations, methods, etc. but ... well, the documentation actually recommends against it for whatever fucking reason, and that whitelisting is about as fine-grained as a club. You wanna restrict it to accessing the "name" column, but it needs to access both the "site" and "user" tables? Cool, users can now access site.name AND user.name... which is PII and totally leads to hefty fines. Thanks!
Fourth. If the gem can't access something thanks to the whitelist, it doesn't catch the exception and give you a useful error message or anything, no way. It just throws NoMethodErrors because fuck you. Good luck figuring out what they mean, especially if you have no idea you're even using the fucking thing.
Fifth. Thanks to the follower mentality prevalent in this hellhole, this shit is now used in a lot of places (and all indirectly!) so there's no searching for uses. Once I banhammer everything... well, loads of shit is going to break, and I won't have a fucking clue where because very few of these brainless sheep write decent test coverage (or even fucking write view tests), so I'll be doing tons of manual fucking testing. Oh, and I only have a week to finish everything, because fucking of course.
So, in summary. The stupid and lazy (and legendary!) dev fucked up. The stupid gem's author fucked up, and kept fucking up. The stupid devs followed the first fuckup's lead and repeated his fuck up, and fucked up on their own some more. It's fuckups all the fucking way down.rant security exploit root swears a lot actually root swears oh my stupid fucking people what the fuck fucking stupid fucking people20 -
#First
I joined a start up and worked after college hours as an intern over there. I would usually bunk my college and go to my internship. I had limited knowledge at that moment. I worked very hard over there because I wanted (still want) to gain practical knowledge.
Almost a month into it and I had to take a break from it because I had college work. Rejoined the same start up during my vacations. Worked quite a lot and learnt quite some stuff. I continued the internship after my one month vacation for another month once my college started. All this while I was not being paid, not even a little bit of allowance. But that didn't matter because I wanted to learn
Fast forward six months to November 2016. I have been placed in an MNC through my college placements. One day I get a call from this start up owner(we had become good acquaintances by then) if I was willing to work as a paid intern while I was working on the projects that the company landed (so I guess as a free-lancer) and as an unpaid intern while I was working on the company projects. I agreed. Jump to December. I have joined and started working on an Android project of this very big company.
At time point, I should inform you'll that I'm not very good at Android and that the company size is very small. Company owner plus the tech lead in one city (where I'm from) and another two full time employees in another city. Out of which one quit to start his own company apparently. The start up would primarily employ interns and provide exposure to them while getting their work done.
Back to the story. The tech lead vaguely assigns everyone their work. Everyone over here includes new interns and previous interns like me who will get paid some amount. 3-4 days into the project, the tech lead quits. The tech lead and the company owner call three of us and says that one of you will have to be a project manager for this project. And then both of them and 2 of my colleagues look at me. And I don't know what to say. I hesitate initially because it's too much responsibility but agree to it finally.
The next day I come to office and read about the project thoroughly and catch up with my colleagues about the progress. The entire day I'm panicking about what I'm going to do. In the evening, my boss tells me that we have to go for a meeting with the client for whom we are doing this project. At this moment, the shit out of me has been scared. Mostly because I don't know what the fuck am I going to do over there apart from being stupid and asking dumb questions. So we reach the client's office and wait for him. The entire time I'm thinking to myself that I'm going to drown this company by opening my mouth. Surprisingly, all the questions that I asked seemed legitimate and I asked a lot of questions. And so I didn't drown the company after all...phew!
It's been more than a week. And holy fuck! What a pain it is to manage people. Half of my time is spent on updating excel sheet about their progress, where are they stuck and what is needed. And the other half about thinking what the fuck am I doing or how am I gonna do it.
So to sum up, intern-turned-freelancer-turned-project manager who has no idea what the fuck is going on. Seems pretty crazy, don't you think.6 -
The solution for this one isn't nearly as amusing as the journey.
I was working for one of the largest retailers in NA as an architect. Said retailer had over a thousand big box stores, IT maintenance budget of $200M/year. The kind of place that just reeks of waste and mismanagement at every level.
They had installed a system to distribute training and instructional videos to every store, as well as recorded daily broadcasts to all store employees as a way of reducing management time spend with employees in the morning. This system had cost a cool 400M USD, not including labor and upgrades for round 1. Round 2 was another 100M to add a storage buffer to each store because they'd failed to account for the fact that their internet connections at the store and the outbound pipe from the DC wasn't capable of running the public facing e-commerce and streaming all the video data to every store in realtime. Typical massive enterprise clusterfuck.
Then security gets involved. Each device at stores had a different address on a private megawan. The stores didn't generally phone home, home phoned them as an access control measure; stores calling the DC was verboten. This presented an obvious problem for the video system because it needed to pull updates.
The brilliant Infosys resources had a bright idea to solve this problem:
- Treat each device IP as an access key for that device (avg 15 per store per store).
- Verify the request ip, then issue a redirect with ANOTHER ip unique to that device that the firewall would ingress only to the video subnet
- Do it all with the F5
A few months later, the networking team comes back and announces that after months of work and 10s of people years they can't implement the solution because iRules have a size limit and they would need more than 60,000 lines or 15,000 rules to implement it. Sad trombones all around.
Then, a wild DBA appears, steps up to the plate and says he can solve the problem with the power of ORACLE! Few months later he comes back with some absolutely batshit solution that stored the individual octets of an IPV4, multiple nested queries to the same table to emulate subnet masking through some temp table spanning voodoo. Time to complete: 2-4 minutes per request. He too eventually gives up the fight, sort of, in that backhanded way DBAs tend to do everything. I wish I would have paid more attention to that abortion because the rationale and its mechanics were just staggeringly rube goldberg and should have been documented for posterity.
So I catch wind of this sitting in a CAB meeting. I hear them talking about how there's "no way to solve this problem, it's too complex, we're going to need a lot more databases to handle this." I tune in and gather all it really needs to do, since the ingress firewall is handling the origin IP checks, is convert the request IP to video ingress IP, 302 and call it a day.
While they're all grandstanding and pontificating, I fire up visual studio and:
- write a method that encodes the incoming request IP into a single uint32
- write an http module that keeps an in-memory dictionary of uint32,string for the request, response, converts the request ip and 302s the call with blackhole support
- convert all the mappings in the spreadsheet attached to the meetings into a csv, dump to disk
- write a wpf application to allow for easily managing the IP database in the short term
- deploy the solution one of our stage boxes
- add a TODO to eventually move this to a database
All this took about 5 minutes. I interrupt their conversation to ask them to retarget their test to the port I exposed on the stage box. Then watch them stare in stunned silence as the crow grows cold.
According to a friend who still works there, that code is still running in production on a single node to this day. And still running on the same static file database.
#TheValueOfEngineers2 -
Okay, story time.
Back during 2016, I decided to do a little experiment to test the viability of multithreading in a JavaScript server stack, and I'm not talking about the Node.js way of queuing I/O on background threads, or about WebWorkers that box and convert your arguments to JSON and back during a simple call across two JS contexts.
I'm talking about JavaScript code running concurrently on all cores. I'm talking about replacing the god-awful single-threaded event loop of ECMAScript – the biggest bottleneck in software history – with an honest-to-god, lock-free thread-pool scheduler that executes JS code in parallel, on all cores.
I'm talking about concurrent access to shared mutable state – a big, rightfully-hated mess when done badly – in JavaScript.
This rant is about the many mistakes I made at the time, specifically the biggest – but not the first – of which: publishing some preliminary results very early on.
Every time I showed my work to a JavaScript developer, I'd get negative feedback. Like, unjustified hatred and immediate denial, or outright rejection of the entire concept. Some were even adamantly trying to discourage me from this project.
So I posted a sarcastic question to the Software Engineering Stack Exchange, which was originally worded differently to reflect my frustration, but was later edited by mods to be more serious.
You can see the responses for yourself here: https://goo.gl/poHKpK
Most of the serious answers were along the lines of "multithreading is hard". The top voted response started with this statement: "1) Multithreading is extremely hard, and unfortunately the way you've presented this idea so far implies you're severely underestimating how hard it is."
While I'll admit that my presentation was initially lacking, I later made an entire page to explain the synchronisation mechanism in place, and you can read more about it here, if you're interested:
http://nexusjs.com/architecture/
But what really shocked me was that I had never understood the mindset that all the naysayers adopted until I read that response.
Because the bottom-line of that entire response is an argument: an argument against change.
The average JavaScript developer doesn't want a multithreaded server platform for JavaScript because it means a change of the status quo.
And this is exactly why I started this project. I wanted a highly performant JavaScript platform for servers that's more suitable for real-time applications like transcoding, video streaming, and machine learning.
Nexus does not and will not hold your hand. It will not repeat Node's mistakes and give you nice ways to shoot yourself in the foot later, like `process.on('uncaughtException', ...)` for a catch-all global error handling solution.
No, an uncaught exception will be dealt with like any other self-respecting language: by not ignoring the problem and pretending it doesn't exist. If you write bad code, your program will crash, and you can't rectify a bug in your code by ignoring its presence entirely and using duct tape to scrape something together.
Back on the topic of multithreading, though. Multithreading is known to be hard, that's true. But how do you deal with a difficult solution? You simplify it and break it down, not just disregard it completely; because multithreading has its great advantages, too.
Like, how about we talk performance?
How about distributed algorithms that don't waste 40% of their computing power on agent communication and pointless overhead (like the serialisation/deserialisation of messages across the execution boundary for every single call)?
How about vertical scaling without forking the entire address space (and thus multiplying your application's memory consumption by the number of cores you wish to use)?
How about utilising logical CPUs to the fullest extent, and allowing them to execute JavaScript? Something that isn't even possible with the current model implemented by Node?
Some will say that the performance gains aren't worth the risk. That the possibility of race conditions and deadlocks aren't worth it.
That's the point of cooperative multithreading. It is a way to smartly work around these issues.
If you use promises, they will execute in parallel, to the best of the scheduler's abilities, and if you chain them then they will run consecutively as planned according to their dependency graph.
If your code doesn't access global variables or shared closure variables, or your promises only deal with their provided inputs without side-effects, then no contention will *ever* occur.
If you only read and never modify globals, no contention will ever occur.
Are you seeing the same trend I'm seeing?
Good JavaScript programming practices miraculously coincide with the best practices of thread-safety.
When someone says we shouldn't use multithreading because it's hard, do you know what I like to say to that?
"To multithread, you need a pair."18 -
Teaching new recruit some SQL (even though hes supposed to fucking know SQL and have multiple years experience but I was a contractor and idgaf, not messing up my money. Just fucking annoying to have an idiot around you all the time).
Me: Okay, so sys tables, so this one is for jobs yeah?
Him: Yeah
Me: Okay, so in this table, its obviously not one row per job per step cos you have multiple rows for the same job and step. Also, there is a datetime field, so what is it showing?
Him: Hmmmmm..... (after some time, back and forth we get to the answer).... history table
Me: Cooooooool, okay, so, lets say, I have a job with 5 steps. If i run it once, how many rows will be in this table?
Him: 5 rows.
Me: Correct, so if I were to have run this same job, 10 times, how many rows get inserted into the table?
Him: (Now...you have to understand, how long this thought process was, im trying to fill the gap with words but really, he was like, having a flashback or something...I kept quiet but silently wanting him to say anything....then he looks me dead in the eyes).... 10!
Me: Motherfucker what!?!? 10 What? If 1 time == 5, what does 10 times ==?
Him: Hmmmmmmmmm.... (yes...we are doing this whole flashback montage all over again)....... Ohhhhh, 1!
Me: .....Stop, think, its a history table. It holds history, for when every step is run for a job, why would it be only one row?
Him: OMG, I know what a history table is!!!!
Me: (Pissed off cos I don't take disrespect calmly). Fine, genius, answer, go!
Him: (LONGER WAIT THAN LAST TIME!!!!)....is it not 10?
Me: I swear, I'm gonna kill you one of these days.
Him: *chuckle*
Me: No...seriously....
TOOK 20-30 MINUTES FOR HIM TO SAY 50!!!!!!
And even then, I swear he didn't understand why. Serious, he was a special breed, had a manager that was a super tard and when I worked here, the spirit of that manager possessed this idiot, the CIO and his little right hand bitch zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
If there was ever a time I was willing to catch a case at work, it was there.
Bonus: Serious, it got to the point I had to come in and tell this idiot that he can only ask me questions today if he calls me by my name...and my name has changed today...and no, you can't ask me for it cos you need my name to ask me questions.....FUCK OFF kkthxbai.5 -
Dear Product owners / Company Owners / Whoever requesting a feature:
Devs like to know they are adding value to whatever product they are working on. Every time you request a stupid no value added request, you kick the dev's soul.
After several hits the developer will stop caring about the software and eventually will get the job done, but oh boy, the amount of tech debt/trash code the dev is gonna leave behind will be horrendous.
Then the next developer, not only takes the hit from another stupid request, he/she will see the crappy code the past sad developer left and will take a double hit. Of course all of them start proactive and try to fix previous blood trails but sadness will catch them eventually.
If you want you're apps/products/reports to be good in a long run don't make stupid requests.
BAs, Stop being Expensive Email Forwarders and challenge a request, understand the process and then hand it to the developer.
Us developers are sensible cute ponies. Treat us well or expect poor quality projects8 -
Weirdest co-worker... We'll not to be judgy, but I think our industry is sort of home of the weirdos, but.. there's a few over-the-top weirdees we've had at work.
First one that comes to mind was a guy that walked liked Mr. Burns, hands behind the back & chest out. He microwaved the same thing every single day for breakfast - crackers, sausage and cheese. 😖This guy would get to his tasks very slowly, wouldn't talk to anyone on our team, and would go missing from his desk a lot, sometimes for extended periods (2+ hours). He really struggled to catch on to easy tasks. He quit after a few months, thank god.
Another weirdo we had was a girl who just couldn't dress to save her soul. She would wear these ugly ass sneakers that had neon colors reminiscent of bowling shoes (neon orange and green) and would wear turtlenecks and floor length skirts that all the colors just clashed. Her outfits were uglier than your great grandma's. Myself, her and 2 other girls dressed up as the Dr. Seuss things for Halloween, but did h1, h2, etc. tags instead and she put like rope from curtains in her hair with like 10 little pony tails. Just like wtf. She would play her gameboy at lunch and not talk to anyone much. She was really bad at our job, a lot of clients complained. She would literally read a book, braid her bangs or nap at her desk. Needless to say, she was fired.6 -
!rant
Today I bring happy news. First company I interviewed at clicked so well, both personally and technically, and they expressed an eagerness to hire me on the spot. I figured we might as well talk salary to compare them against other interviews. The offer they made me was so good I decided to sign there and then. They said they participate in a fair wage program but for me this is absolutely the dream. I get lots of nice perks to boot. And they've already mailed me some tech documentation to go over so I can prepare, as I'll be working with the latest front end stuff and of course my trusty .NET (and yes I asked it'll be C#, haha).
I can't even begin to express how great this is. The last decade I've been unemployed for several years in total, and vastly underpayed when I was employed. I've worked in some toxic environments, been falling behind on tech and wrote a lot of rubbish code as a result of that. But it seems that somehow all the hard work I did put in paid off by taking a chance when it presented itself and go in accepting I might fail horribly. And I did bomb the tech questions actually. But they let me explain myself and come to answers together and saw beyond the black and white.
In short I feel like I've won the work lottery and will start 2018 in style. Part of me is still scared though, that there will be a mistake or a catch or even somehow I'll ruin everything. But that is the risk in life and I'm just going to have to deal. What I can control and will do is my very best, because I want to keep succeeding and have a great future career. And I hope I can inspire others in the same boat with my actions too.1 -
!rant
So, I imagine this little prank is about as old as graphical OS interfaces, but anyways.. Now and then I will take a screenshot of someone's desktop, set that image as their wallpaper, then hide all their icons, make their taskbar (or plural for Linux) to the smallest possible size, and wait for them to try use their PC.
One day a few years back, I tried to catch my mom with this trick, but although it was still pretty epic, it did not happen quite as I expected.
Suffice to say with her knowledge of keyboard shortcuts, she actually used her laptop for about an hour before she noticed none of the taskbar buttons were working.
Yay for trying to prank people who actually know how to use a computer. Lol.1 -
Depression update two.
Thanks for amazing support guys!
I have made decision to have a digital detox. Today I did have another bout of depression accompanied with a mild case of confused state of mind and suicidal thoughts. I have found the triggers(Social media and too much time spent on the internet.) I have lost a lot of weight too. From 68KG -> 46 KG in span of weeks. So I hope I will catch you soon after I recover from it.
Fuck depression. If anyone is having bouts of depression please contact your health-care provider or friends/family.
Love you all. ❤️🙏☺️10 -
Love really fucking sucks. It's the only exception i try but can't catch and i end up crashing in a bar alone and drunk. I finally wake up in my apartment just to do it all over again.14
-
LONELINESS IS REAL
I am a freshman in a university ( about to complete my first year ) with a girl to boy ratio of around 1:10. During my first semester I was spending a lot of time with friends, chatting up with people and making connections. Due to this my productivity as a dev, if I am even capable of being called that decreased ( I was not a developer before joining , but I had an aim of being one , esp at least the best in my batch ) after 1st year. In retrospect I did nothing productive till 3 months out of 4 in my first sem and the guilt hit me hard . During the last month I had to catch up with my much neglected studies and all I had done was a little bit of html and css, and barely scratched the surface of js( please don't judge me for this :) , I had to start somewhere < although I learned a little bit of C++ > ). BUT I WAS A HAPPY CUNT, and had no sign of lonelines. Now during this sem , I had made progress ( learn js with es6 syntax and still learning, did c++ and extended my knowledge ) . Currently I am working on my Vue full stack app ( along with express and some websocket library , TBD ) < yeh I learnt some backend too > , and increasing my knowledge of dsa using clrs. Although my productivity has increased manifolds but I know feel the need of closure. I am kinda happy with the fact that I know a lot of people around here ( thanks to my extroverted 1st semester ) but sometimes it hits me hard at night when I don't have a monitor to drown my eyes and thoughts in. I have increased my academic performance too but I need someone to share and express my feelings with. I could have made a girlfriend earlier but now most of them are taken and I have lost touch. But believe me, all I want is a companion to spend these lonely days and night ( not talking about as a friend ). Staying away from home isnt easy you know...m :(
KUDOS TO DEVRANT FOR DEVELOPING A COMMUNITY WHERE PEOPLE LIKE ME CAN FEEL SAFE IN OUR NATURAL HABITAT. I COULDN'T HAVE EXPRESSED MY FEELINGS ANYWHERE ELSE EXCEPT IN A PERSONAL BLOG ( where no one would have read it )
PS1: I apologise if I sounded arrogant about any of my skill, I didn't mean that way. I ain't even that good, just kinda proud of myself a little for achieving something I couldn't have thought.
PS2: Any type of suggestions and help is much appreciated ( considering I am a college student who went into some serious development 4 months ago , I am pretty impressionable ;) )
PS3: Please don't confuse this with depression. I am HAPPY BUT LONELY
PS4: Is there a way so that I can change my username?16 -
TL.DR.: Emojis in commit messages + bad commit messages made by Microsoft™ employees.
Yes, I'm looking at you Microsoft. It would be helpful if I can, you know, understand your commit messages instead of trying to guess wtf _that_ emoji means. That is, if it is the same emoji on my machine. We didn't figure that one out yet. And no, "Some 💄 changes ✨" is not a good commit message, even if you interpret it correctly (which depends on your emoji icon set).
idk about you, but that shitty 💄 emoji tends to be (see image) and I happen to associate that with an XLR audio cable. I had to ask someone else to understand a commit message; a message supposed to be explicit—stating what you changed and optionally why you changed it (you can off-load that part to an issue tracker).
Furthermore, that "Some 💄 changes ✨" commit did none of that. "I made cosmetic changes somewhere for some reason without linking to an issue." If you didn't catch that little detail yet: "COSMETIC CHANGES" is vague as fuck. What is a cosmetic change?
* Does a cosmetic change mean adjusting indentation?
* Does it mean deleting unnecessary abstraction to make the code more readable?
* Does it mean refactoring code to add that beauty factor?
* Does it mean all of the above? Or perhaps a specific combination of these?
Human communication is shit enough, don't make it worse than it already is.22 -
Dev: Hi Guys, we've noticed on crashlytics that one of your screens has a small crash. Can you look?
Me: Ok we had a look, and it looks to us to be a memory leak issue on most of the other screens. Homepage, Search, Product page etc. all seem to have sizeable memory leaks. We have a few crashes on our screens saying iPhone 11's (which have 4gb of ram) are crashing with only 1% of ram left.
What we think is happening is that we have weak references to avoid circular dependencies. Our weak references are most likely the only things the system would be able to free up, resulting in our UI not being able to contact the controller, breaking everything. Because of the custom libraries you built that we have to use, we can't really catch this.
Theres not really a lot we can do. We are following apples recommendations to avoid circular dependencies and memory leaks. The instruments say our screens are behaving fine. I think you guys will have to fix the leaks. Sorry.
Dev 1: hhhmm, what if you create a circular dependency? Then the UI won't loose any of the data.
Dev 2: Have you tried looking at our analytics to understand how the user is getting to your screens?
=================================
I've been sitting here for 15 minutes trying to figure out how to respond before they come online. I am fucking horrified by those responses to "every one of your screens have memory leaks"2 -
Earlier I signed up on this forum called NulledBB. Basically some hacker skiddie forum that had a dump of an archive I wanted, unfortunately behind a paywall which I didn't want to bother with.
On signup I noticed that I couldn't use my domain as an email address, as I usually do (the domain is a catch-all which means that mail addresses can be made up for each service I sign up to on the fly, super useful). They did expose the regex that they accepted email as however, which included something along the lines of "@live.*".
So I figured, why not register a subdomain live.nixmagic.com real quick and put that into the mail servers? Didn't take too long and that's what I eventually went with, and registered as somepissedoffsysop@live.nixmagic.com (which I have no trouble putting on a public forum as you'll see in a minute).
Still didn't manage to get that archive I wanted but I figured, fuck it. It's a throwaway account anyway. But eventually that email address started to receive spam. Stupid motherfucker of a forum operator with his Kali skidmachine probably leaked it.
Usually I just blacklist the email address in SpamAssassin by adding an additional spam score of 100 to email sent to such addresses. But in that case it didn't even sit on the main domain, thanks to that stupid regex block from earlier... 😏
*Logs into my domain admin panel*
*Le rm on the live.nixmagic.com record*
Null routed entirely.. nulled, if you will! 🙃3 -
When you have dependency issues and can't work it out...
Just run
#npm install all-packages
And wait a millennia
https://npm.io/package/...6 -
Just need to get this off my chest. Started a new job 3 weeks ago at a company that has been around ~18 years, it is only recently that they have started to grow more rapidly. I was brought in under the guise that they wanted to embrace change and better practices and so said I was up for the challenge.
In my 2nd week I was asked to produce a document on tackling the technical debt and an approach to software development in the future for 3 consultants who were coming in to review the development practices of the company on behalf of the private equity firm who has taken a major stake in the company. I wrote the document trying to be factual about the current state and where I wanted to go, key points being:
Currently a tightly coupled monolith with little separation of concerns (73 projects in one solution but you have to build two other solutions to get it to build because there are direct references.).
Little to no adherence to SOLID principles.
No automated testing whatsoever.
Libraries all directly referenced using the file system rather than Nuget.
I set out a plan which said we needed to introduce TDD, breaking dependencies, splitting libraries into separate projects with nuget packages. Start adhering to SOLID principles, looking at breaking the project down into smaller services using the strangler pattern etc. After submitting what I had written to be part of a larger document I was told that it had been tweaked as they felt it was too negative. I asked to see the master document and it turns out they had completely excluded it.
I’ve had open and frank discussions with the dev team who to me have espoused that previously they have tried to do better, tackle technical debt etc but have struggled to get management to allow them. All in all a fairly poor culture. They seem almost resigned to their fate.
In my first 2 weeks I was told to get myself acquainted and to settle myself in. I started looking at the code and was quite shocked at how poorly written a lot of it was and in discussions with my manager have been critical of the code base and quite passionate and opinionated about the changes I want to see.
Then on Friday, the end of my third week, I was invited to a meeting for a catch up. The first thing I was told was that they felt I was being too openly critical in the office and whether I was a good fit for the company, essentially a stay or go ultimatum. I’ve asked for the weekend to think about it.
I’ve been a little rocked by it being so quickly asked if I was a good fit for the company and it got my back up. I told them that I was a good fit but for me to stay I want to see a commitment to changes, they told me that they had commitments to deliver new features and that we might be able to do it at some point in the future but for now I just needed to crack on.
Ordinarily I would just walk but I’ve recently started the process to adopt kids and changing jobs right now would blow that out the water. At the same time I’m passionate about what I do and having a high standards, I’m not going to be silenced for being critical but maybe I will try and tackle it in a different way. I think my biggest issue is that my boss who was previously a Senior Developer (my current position) has worked at the company for 12 years and it is his only job, so when I’m being critical it’s most likely criticising code he wrote. I find it hard to have the respect of a boss who I had to teach what a unit test was and how to write one. It makes it hard to preach good standards when by all accounts they don’t see the problems.
Just wondering if anyone has suggestions or experience that might help me tackle this situation?12 -
I once had to make a shitty canvas game as part of a marketing campaign when I worked for an agency, for fuck only knows what. You dragged a shopping trolley back and forth in an aisle, and got points for catching items that fell from the top.
The initial round of feedback had the complaint that sometimes players weren't receiving points for items. I spent a night playing this senseless game over and over, but I never failed to get the points for an item. I was pretty confident that it worked, it wasn't like the logic was complex, so I sent it over.
Second round of feedback had the same complaint. They were getting quite annoyed by it, said that it was a bad user experience. Again, I could not reproduce it at all: the game was an equally tedious waste of life on every device I tried it on.
In exasperation, I asked the sales guy whose pitch it had been to get me a video or a more detailed report. The client was quite arsey, as they saw it, at having to do bug-fixing for us, but they did agree.
Anyway, it transpired that they were angry that players were not receiving the points for the items they *failed* to catch. The way they saw it, the game wouldn't be fun if you were punished for not catching items - so they wanted the player to get ten points for every item on screen, regardless or not of whether they caught it in their trolley. Of course, I thought. Silly me.
I was actually quite impressed at how a marketing department could accidentally undermine the very notion of a game whilst seeking to make one more fun.8 -
May i ask for help dear fellow devRanters?
@aureliagbrl suffered a deep depression and pressure from her family, the cause is exceptionally simple yet very crucial; so here's the story :
Every week, in friday after the last class she have to go home to fulfill her family wish to gather around and will come back to her dorm in Sunday. her home is more than 1.5 hour from University. recently one class in Wednesday moved out to Saturday Noon for some reason this cause her to go home in Saturday afternoon, yet her family doesn't care if it means she have to wake up 3am in Monday, to get back alone to catch up with class. her family just want to gather around longer, that's it, no exception. According to her this is so frustrating and exhausting. so the condition now is Tomorrow Morning (Monday) there will be a Live Coding Exam. she isn't prepared, her only wish was to get back on Sunday instead of Monday to Study. her family discard her wish entirely. this make her so deeply depressed and i can't even talk to her, she starting to mumbling about quitting college, and etc, etc.
We all know how bad it is to burnt out right ? and we want our fellow developers get out from it and a good shape. My wish is simple from you guys, i wish you can mention her in comment and cheer her up.
Thank You
here is her cheerful photo.35 -
I just tried to sign up to Instagram. I made a big mistake.
First up with Facebook related stuff is data. Data, data and more data. Initially when you sign up (with a new account, not login with Facebook) you're asked your real name, email address and phone number. And finally the username you'd like to have on the service. I gave them a phone number that I actually own, that is in my iPhone, my daily driver right now (and yes I have 3 Androids which all run custom ROMs, hold your keyboards). The email address is a usual for me, instagram at my domain. I am a postmaster after all, and my mail server is a catch-all one. For a setup like that, this is perfectly reasonable. And here it's no different, devrant at my domain. On Facebook even, I use fb at my domain. I'm sure you're starting to see a pattern here. And on Facebook the username, real name and email domain are actually the same.
So I signed up, with - as far as I'm aware - perfectly valid data. I submitted the data and was told that someone at Instagram will review the data within 24 hours. That's already pretty dystopian to me. It is now how you block bots. It is not how Facebook does it either, at least since last time I checked. But whatever. You'd imagine that regardless of the result, they'd let you know. Cool, you're in, or sorry, you're rejected and here's why. Nope.
Fast-forward to today when I recalled that I wanted to sign up to Instagram to see my girlfriend's pictures. So I opened Chromium again that I already use only for the rancid Facebook shit.. and it was rejected. Apparently the mere act of signing up is a Terms of Service violation. I have read them. I do not know which section I have violated with the heinous act of signing up. But I do have a hunch.
Many times now have I been told by ignorant organizations that I would be "stealing" their intellectual property, or business assets or whatever, just because I sent them an email from their name on my domain. It is fucking retarded. That is MY domain, not yours. Learn how email works before you go educate a postmaster. Always funny to tell them how that works. But I think that in this case, that is what happened.
So I appealed it, using a random link to something on Instagram's help section from a third-party blog. You know it's good when the third-party random blog is better. But I found the form and filled it in. Same shit all over again for info, prefilling be damned I guess. Minor convenience though, whatever.
I get sent an email in German, because apparently browsing through a VPS in Germany acting as a VPN means you're German. Whatever... After translating it, I found that it asks me to upload a picture of myself, holding a paper in my hands, on which I would have a confirmation code, my username, and my email address.. all hand-written. It must not be too dark, it must be clear, it must be in JPEG.. look, I just wanted to fucking sign up.
I sent them an email back asking them to fix all of this. While I was writing it and this rant, I thought to myself that they can shove that piece of paper up their ass. In fact I would gladly do it for them.
Long story short, do not use Instagram. And one final thing I have gripes with every time. You are not being told all the data you'll have to present from the get-go. You're not being told the process. Initially I thought it'd just be email, phone, username, and real name. Once signed up (instantly, not within 24 hours!) I would start setting up my account and adding a profile picture. The right way to ask for a picture of me! And just do it at my own pace, as I please.
And for God's sake, tackle abuse when it actually happens. You'll find out who's a bot and who isn't by their usage patterns soon enough. Do not do any of this at sign-up. Or hell, use a CAPTCHA or whatever, I don't fucking care. There's so many millions of ways to skin this cat.
Facebook and especially Instagram. Both of them are fucking retarded.6 -
So spent almost all my time on break just hoping to catch the elusive 512++, never came so I went to bed and slept... Woke up and by the skin of my teeth!!!!9
-
Manager: Hey, what you working on?
Me: cough-finding another team-cough.
Manager: I didn't catch that.
Me: Sorry my throat is acting up today, i've been bug fixing all day.
Manager: Ah great, thanks.1 -
The more I use Go, the more i start to like it. I didn’t realize how nice being able to generate binaries for every OS that matters was, until I had that power. It beats the hell out of trying to distribute a Python app for sure.
Sure, it has its warts.
It’s overly bureaucratic in the same way Java is.
I hate that you can’t import something without using it (most people I’d wager preemptively import libraries they know they’re gonna need even if the code isn’t written yet)
I really wish there was a way to just say “See this JSON blob? All those keys and values are strings, trust me, you don’t need me to tell you the type of each one individually.”
Generics would be nice.
I’d kill for exceptions - any decently sized go program is going to have very many if err checks where most could be condensed down to a single try/catch in most other langs.
I wish the tooling was better. Dependency management was a solved problem when Go was released and yet they chose to ship without it. There’s still no standard. Many hours of time have been wasted dinking with this.
But ya know what? Even with those warts, it’s still easier to write than Java. It’s still write once run anywhere, it’s blazing fast, and doesn’t require your end user to install an entire freakin runtime.
<3 Go2 -
Google:- Google home is using machine learning to remove all type of back noise like traffic, air, and others so the call experience goes smoother.
Microsoft:- In Skype we are using machine learning to catch all type of back noise and mix it with your voice. Skype will try every possible way to make your call experience as bad as possible. Every type of noise Trafic, Air, hardware, your breath if there is nothing! the software will cut your voice and send only a few parts.4 -
After I spent 4 years in a startup company (it was literally just me and a guy who started it).
Being web dev in this company meant you did everything from A-Z. Mostly though it was shitty hacky "websites/webapps" on one of the 3 shitty CMSs.
At some point we had 2 other devs and 2 designers (thank god he hired some cause previously he tried designing them on his own and every site looked like a dead puppy soaked in ass juice).
My title changed from a peasant web dev to technical lead which meant shit. I was doing normal dev work + managing all projects. This basically meant that I had to show all junior devs (mostly interns) how to do their jobs. Client meetings, first point of contact for them, caring an "out of hours" support phone 24/7, new staff interviews, hiring, training and much more.
Unrealistic deadlines, stress and pulling hair were a norm as was taking the blame anytime something went wrong (which happened very often).
All of that would be fine with me if I was paid accordingly, treated with respect as a loyal part of the team but that of course wasn't the case.
But that wasn't the worst part about this job. The worst thing was the constant feeling that I'm falling behind, so far behind that I'll never be able to catch up. Being passionate about web development since I was a kid this was scaring the shit out of me. Said company of course didn't provide any training, time to learn or opportunities to progress.
After these 4 years I felt burnt out. Programming, once exciting became boring and stale. At this point I have started looking for a new job but looking at the requirements I was sure I ain't going anywhere. You see when I was busy hacking PHP CMSs, OOPHP became a thing and javascript exploded. In the little spare time I had I tried online courses but everyone knows it's not the same, doing a course and actually using certain technology in practice. Not going to mention that recruiters usually expect a number of years of experience using the technology/framework/language.
That was the moment I lost faith in my web dev future.
Happy to say though about a month later I did get a job in a great agency as a front end developer (it felt amazing to focus on one thing after all these years of "full-stack bullshit), got a decent salary (way more than I expected) and work with really amazing and creative people. I get almost too much time to learn new stuff and I got up to speed with the latest tech in a few weeks. I'm happy.
Advice? I don't really have any, but I guess never lose faith in yourself.3 -
i know we're all sick and tired of the covid talk, but...
I'm so, so sedentary right now, more so than two years ago, and that's a feat.
this past week i had to walk a little and do some stuff, and today i woke up a little earlier and spent my afternoon in the sun. and it feels so good, to just... do nothing, sunbathe, pet my cat, kiss my boyfriend.
i never realize how much this shit wears me down until i catch a break. it's not just the pandemic though, it's this career, this lifestyle. sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours straight, no window in sight... that's death, no matter how much of an introverted nerd i may be.
if someone wants advice, I'll tell you to go out, get some fresh air, do nothing at all. we don't need to do something at every minute of the day, that's not resting. find a park, a beach, some piece of nature and just breathe it in, it's worth it.4 -
Crazy code.
You know when you come across some code, where you think: “I kinda see what you were going for, but it’s still hella dumb though...” right?
Currently doing some work on an F# backend, and the dev clearly knew enough of the language, but their code makes me question a lot.
The problem is simple: use a third party tool to generate images of each page in a pdf.
Said tool supports:
1. Querying the number of pages
2. Getting all pages as separate images in a single invocation
Can you guess how the dev solved it?
They’ve recursively incremented a page number, called the external tool to grab the image of that page.
“But how does it know when it’s run out of pages?” I hear you ask.
Simple. Catch the inevitable exception, and check against a hardcoded string literal to see whether it says “must be before the end of the document”.
I shit you not.
I nearly had an actual seizure when I was debugging some semi-related code and ended up in this wonderland of fuckery.
The recursion and pattern matching was flawless though, yet the tool’s website clearly states the supported functionality.
The whole thing feels like they tried to do it the right way, but couldn’t be bothered / couldn’t get it right, so they ended up creating this insane bit of madness.5 -
I took this contract and made the suggestion that we backup to the cloud and create a private repo on GIT. Client said no, local should be fine, they don't want someone stealing their code. I said okay fine.
AC just went out in the server room and they apparently had a leak from the AC to the power supply which they happened to put on top of the rack servers and switches. I'm surprised that place didn't catch fire, might be to early to call it.
All this on a Friday and we were 2 weeks away from launch party.
Not my fault, I clearly said we backup to cloud and use GIT on private repo.3 -
Do you have a ‘Drama Queen’ on your team?
This happened last week.
DK = Drama Queen
DK: “OMG..the link to the document isn’t working! All I get is page not found. I’m supposed to update the notes for this project…and now I can’t! What the _bleep_ and I supposed to do now?!...I don’t understand how …”
This goes on for it seems 5 minutes.
Me: “Hold on...someone probably accidently mistyped the file name or something. I’m sure the document is still there.”
DK: “Well, I’ll never find it. Our intranet is a mess. I’m going to have to tell the PM that the project is delayed now and there is nothing I can do about it because our intranet is such a mess.”
Me: “Maybe, but why don’t you open up the file and see where the reference is?”
DK: “Oh, _bleep_ no…it is HTML…I don’t know anything about HTML. If the company expects me to know HTML, I’m going to have to tell the PM the project is delayed until I take all the courses on W3-Schools.”
Me: “Um…you’ve been developing as long as I have and you have a couple of blogs. You know what an anchor tag is. I don’t think you have to take all those W3 courses. It’s an anchor tag with a wrong HREF, pretty easy to find and fix”
DK: “Umm…I know *my* blog…not this intranet mess. Did you take all the courses on W3-Schools? Do you understand all the latest web html standards?”
Me: “No, but I don’t think W3 has anything to do the problem. Pretty sure I can figure it out.”
DK: “ha ha…’figuring it out’. I have to know every detail on how the intranet works. What about the javascript? Those intranet html files probably have javascript. I can’t make any changes until I know I won’t break anything. _bleep_! Now I have to learn javascript! This C# project will never get done. The PM is going to be _bleep_issed! Great..and I’ll probably have to work weekends to catch up!”
While he is ranting…I open up the html file, locate the misspelling, fix it, save it..
Me: “Hey..it’s fixed. Looks like Karl accidently added a space in the file name. No big deal.”
DK:”What!!! How did you…uh…I don’t understand…how did you know what the file name was? What if you changed something that broke the page? How did you know it was the correct file? I would not change anything unless I understood every detail. You’re gonna’ get fired.”
Me: “Well, it’s done. Move on.”9 -
Using pokemon exeption handling on some very important and sensitive back end stuff to meet a deadline.7
-
Does anyone feel overwhelmed by all the new technologies? It's like every developer nowadays code in JS, and knows ES6, React, webpack, babel by heart. I have been working in Java for less than a decade and sometimes feel like I can't catch up. Even in Java ecosystem there is now Scala, Groovy, Gradle, Kotlin... Not to mention other languages like Python, Swift... How do you guys have time to pick up everything?? 😖7
-
A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in here a flat tire. three men try to solve the problem
the project manager said: let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we will reach out destination.
the computer programmer said: we have drivers guide.I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive.
commuter operator said: first of all turnoff the engine and turn it on again. may be it will fix the problem.
suddenly a Microsoft engineer passed by and said: try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get on and try again. -
So I wanted to update my visual studio. Turns out I cant because WPF (Apparently the Installers uses it) has a problem with broken fonts.
Okay. No problem I thought. I uninstalled all 720 fonts and re-registered them, filtering out the 3 broken ones. Checked the time-stamp as suggested. Everything fine. Had to reboot. (Of curse.)
Rechecked the fonts, reports as okay. Tried to start the installer BUT THIS FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT SOFTWARE CRASHES ON ME AGAIN WITH THE SAME FOCKING ERROR. IT DOESN'T EVENT WANT TO FUCKING TELL ME WHICH FUCKING FONT IS THE PROBLEM. I CHECKED EVERYYYY SINGLE FUCKING FONT. NOT THAT THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY TO FUCKING CATCH A FUCKING FUCKER EXCEPTION IN THIS FUCKING WORLD. I mean seriously. Why would you crash on a font THAT YOU DON'T EVEN USE IN YOUR FUCKING FUCK PROGRAMM TO INSTALL YOUR FUCKING PICE OF SHIT SOFTWARE.
But, IT GETS WORSE. TURNS OUT MICKY FUCKING SOFT KNOWS ABOUT THIS FUCKING BUG SINCE TWO-FUCKING-THOUSAND-FOURTEEN.
And they didn't fixed it. Nooooooooo. THEY FUCKING WROTE A FUCKING WORKAROUND THAT DOES NOT FUCKING WORKKKKKK AND KEEP PUTTING THIS FUCKING BUG IN EVERY FUCKING INSTALLER SINCE THEN.
Can you tell I'm pissed? YES? GOOOOOOD. BECAUSE I FUCKING AM.
MICKYSOFT CAN GO AND SUCK A FUCKING APPROPRIATE THING TO SUCK IN THIS FUCKING SITUATION.
THE BEST? THEY EVEN FUCKING DARE TO ASK ABOUT MY FUCKING FEEDBACK. YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU GET MY FUCKING FEEDBACK. TOGETHER WITH A FUCKING BAG FULL OF FUCKING SHIT TO YOUR FUCKING HQ
CAN I HAVE A FUCKING STRESSBALL NOW
</rant>3 -
*Senior Dev:* Ah yes, we need to put try-catch in every function to handle errors and Logger.Log() at the beginning.
*Me:* Is not better to define a global error handler and use the stacktrace instead of doing all that?
*Senior Dev*: ...
*Senior Dev*: Is a rule here, do what I'm telling you.3 -
If you are programming in C++ please always return a type from a function as the function prototype return type.
I had to debug some old code that failed to return a boolean on one of its flow paths. It would work on linux in release and debug, would work on windows in debug, and fail on windows in release.
The failure was NOT straightforward at ALL. It would return exit code 3. Then if I added a debug print to the function it would segfault.
Why the hell would popping something extra off the return/call stack not crash more readily? Wth is the point of debug compile if it won't catch shit like this?8 -
The cleaning lady saga continues...
(previous: https://devrant.com/rants/1850777)
Had an appointment with their manager, stuff gets discussed and coordinated at a 3x slower pace than if I'd done it myself (as usual because fuck efficiency when there's muggles involved -_-), yada yada.
*mail addresses for contact start getting discussed*
Incompetent fuck of a manager: And you $realName, your email address is $company@nixmagic.com, then changed to $nickname@nixmagic.com? Mind explaining this?
Me: Oh yeah that's just because I give out different email addresses to each contact person when it involves public forms or registrations, helps with spam prevention and putting the company name of the correspondent in there helps with easy recognition when some company's database leaks and I start getting a lot of spam on that mailbox.
IFOM: Really.. we actually weren't sure whether we should reply to something with our company name in it.. you know, not sure whether it's legit etc. Why would anyone want to use one of our email addresses as theirs?
… Let that sink in for a moment. They think that $company@nixmagic.com is theirs? Just because it's their domain (minus TLD) in front of MY FUCKING DOMAIN? How about you start by learning how email addresses work first, because clearly you have no fucking clue about it. Are you the kind of brainless fucks that get lured in by http://totallylegitbank.com.freehost.com/... scams? Fucking stupid piece of fucking shit.
Oh, and when you're using MS Exchange, of course you can't know that when you're having your own domain, you actually also own every fucking mailbox on it, because Microshaft doesn't allow you to have more than n amount of mailboxes, unless you gobble up money for them. But you know what, in my case it's a fucking catch-all domain running Linux on its servers, so yeah I can use whatever the fuck I want in front of it, including your stupid fucking cleaning company.
IFOM: And then there's your current designated email address. $nickname@nixmagic.com..
Oh you're going to criticise that as well?! Yeah condor is my fucking nickname all over the internet, and my username on all my systems. That's why I use it. But you know what else is an email address that you might come across, because people are shallow idiots like that? ILoveBigTits69@gmail.com or something like that. You know what, how about I address you next time from ILoveBigTits69_OhAndYoursAreAWashboard@nixmagic.com, because you know what? I CAN FUCKING DO THAT. But you know, I at least am halfway fucking professional about my business-related stuff, so I won't because I really don't want to be associated with such an email address. So don't you fucking dare to criticize me for using my fucking nickname instead of my real name.
Long story short, people are fucking idiots.6 -
I accidentally created something adorable. See, what happened was I wanted to figure out how to programmatically create blobcats for different countries, since I’d done it by hand for every country represented at my company and wanted a quick way to catch up once we add people from different countries.
Enter Cloudinary!
Wrote a transform that would take the image, shrink it to 150 px wide, then add the blobcat emoji as the underlayer behind and above it, then add the little arms I drew die holding the flag on top.
And that worked! I had a folder of flags and the frontend could query them using the transformations and the country blobcats were born! I even added a preset so I could view the little blobcats with their flags when I looked at the uploaded flags
But then I’m like “Eh, each transform adds a thing against my limit and I really don’t want to go over if this gets popular (why do I ever think _that’s_ a possibility?). I know! I’ll just add the transform on upload and reupload all the flags to a different folder! Then I’ll just need to request the image instead of having to do the transform per request.
And that worked!
But I forgot I still had my preset transform on.
So in addition to the successful country blobcat, I had a preview of what I like to call papa blobcat with kitten blobcat.4 -
Raging here, overheating really. One spends thousands on technology that is promoted with the catch phrase "it just works", yet here I am, after updating my fancy new emoji maker (iphone x) to 11.2 and then attempt to carry on working by compiling my code to test some new features. And...
oh, whats this xCode? You have a problem? You can't locate something? You can't locate iOS 11.2 (15C114)... sorry and you think that this "May not" be supported in current version of Xcode?
Let me get this straight you advanced piece of technological wizardy, you know you are missing something, you in fact know what it is, you can actually TELL me what is missing and yet, still, in 2017, you can't go FETCH it?????
Really? All you can do is sit, with that stupid look on your face, and watch the paint dry? Your stuck? That's it?
I hate you for the false pretense of advanced capability. and for your lack of a consistent dark theme so my eyes stop bleeding when reading your "I don't know what to do" messages...
By the way, maybe you can stop randomly crashing, or pinwheeling, I get that your bored as a machine designed to crunch numbers/data/code all day long and that for fun you feel you have to add some color to your subsitance. But stop it. Do what I'm told you can do, "JUST WORK" for once without me having to drag you forward kicking and screaming.
K. that feels better. Now for some whiskey.5 -
try philosophy()
catch markAsSpam()
Do you ever think of organizations as people? People personify Google and stuff all the time, but I mean something deeper.
When I look at devRant threads, I feel like we're all part of a collective consciousness, growing and thinking and making decisions. Society is a living thing of its own, in the same way that living cells unknowingly make up an individual body. When a question is asked from one node, another node answers, and the result is a repository of questions, answers, opinions, and jokes on an app that might appear as the scrolling thoughts of a singular mind rife with pure, aggressively structured information.12 -
Fuuuuck!!!
In 2017 I had a reeeeally sweet offer for a Java-gig. Equity, quarterly evaluations with potential raises, exciting products, world class experts as colleagues and all. The catch was relocating across the entire country, and due to some family health stuff, I was forced to decline.
Today I learned that the company is valued at about $150M. The equity alone would have been worth around 1.5M today, and thats not all. One of the founders are giving away about 15% of the shares to the employees, landing them about 100K in equity each.
And here I sit, wondering about what the next electric bill will be...10 -
I have some good, no, great news I forgot to share yesterday:
Drum roll 🥁🥁🥁🥁
I just got my first job as an intern!!!
I'll be developing their product from scratch along with a few other devs, it's gonna be awesome. My primary occupation will be as a backend dev, but I'm also gonna help a bit on the frontend.
They also said they won't micro manage me, they just want me to deliver their tasks, so I can work whenever I want and not necessarily 6 hours a day. I'm a bit skeptical here because that sounds like they're gonna overwork me, but they also said they don't want to get in the way of my studies in college, so idk. It seems like a really nice place.
It's going to be remote work and the pay is also very good for an internship.
All of it seems way too good to be true, there has to be a catch... I'll find out in time, just let me be happy for getting my first actual job ever ok? Just for a few days.
Anyways, I'm just so fucking happy with this and wanted to share it with ya :)7 -
Today I learned why it’s so important to have life outside engineering (better put, I remembered this).
For the last couple of weeks, we’ve been working hard to catch some deadlines, contributing to a large oss project. Getting up at 4am, working with the team in my timezone, having some time with family then working with people with 6-9 hour difference was extremelly challenging and I was so tired I literaly was a fucking pain to bear with.
Today, on Saturday, my wife started cleaning the bathroom sink drain. You know, started... “won’t fix” was not an option. First, the dirt and the smell, mmmmmm, you just have to love it. And then the thing collapses (yes, I was optimistic, trying to clean it just partly - I learned not to fix if it aint’t broken, I wonder where).
It’s of course built of trivial parts, but the water just finds its way. Needless to say, I am afraid of it :). In the end, it got resolved. Just as any bug we squash - with some anger and plenty of dirty words.
During the whole thing, I thought to myself, that all that stress at work is quite bearable; it put everything back into a perspective. Great feeling!1 -
!rant
I've lost all fucking motivation to do anything at the moment.
Fuck not even gaming is much fun anymore.
Also amazing that I have so little time on Mondays that I can't even eat properly.
Literally living on caffeine, a spoonful of, like, porridge and water on Mondays.
And of course the nice bistro is closed on Mondays.
Then there is that motherfucker of person at school that just randomly starts sharing weird ass details with you and promptly started to break out in tears when she failed maths today.
Like fucking hell, then for some reason the same person fucks up everything in her volleyball group by literally doing nothing and complains when she gets hit by a fucking volleyball, like, she doesn't even attempt to dodge it catch it.
So much for that fuckery.
Then there's these little brats that just completely play asshole and are being jackasses to everyone including upperclassmen and teachers.
Grab em by the throat and fucking put them in a toilet.
Literally the reason why our school is generally known as the 'Drecksloch', literally dirt hole.
The fucking volume is driving me batshit insane in school to the point where I just start yelling at people.
Fucking kids, it literally doesn't cost you shit to just shut the fuck up.
Okay, vent over.
Sorry for that.12 -
Name a more iconic duo than web developers on help sites and having pissing contests over which modules they use instead of actually answering the question!
I've been a web dev/server admin for all of about a month now, and only known PHP for about a week of that, and the one thing really that grates on me isn't PHP's odd function naming inconsistencies or at times outright trash documentation, it's the other developers who, when asked a fairly straightforward question about why a mysqli function won't return something, demand you use PDO instead.
Please. I'm running a LEMP stack on a Raspberry Pi here, I'm trying to keep dependencies to an absolute minimum because the SD card is tiny, the Pi will catch on fire if it runs any hotter, and more dependencies are more potential points of failure. Just answer the damn question. I'm not going to install PDO for something I know I can do anyway just because it makes my code look slightly prettier.
Honourable mention to all you Node.js developers out there too, with your thousands of useless npm dependencies. I salute you.8 -
So at this startup i was single iOS dude age 34, android had 1.5 dudes, one older, one you ger. That 0.5 younger was tech director, really good, so they churned for two guys. Millenial, nice guy, never making conflict, just being sleazebag.
Nobody explained to boss why iOS was always late with features, even when i complained. So i got help, 10 months later, project was unpolished but stable, codewise. Now i interview and hire a guy, age 27, who was all yeah dude no problem, and that being my first interview, i fell under his friendly appearance. I ignored a fact that he didn’t know 90% of stuff i was asking him, because he was so friendly and outgoing and we will do anything attitude.
The guy knew very little, was childish and irresponisble. He showed at work at noon. He started telling me what to do, his senior collegue who started the project. He argued about everything that i would tell him. So i spent three to four hours a day charting with him, because we were in different cities. He had two uears of experence, but he was below junior level. And he refused any of my advices for learning in free time. No, he said, thats my free time, you will not tell me what to do. Well, how do you plan on being better, i asked. He said, i learn by doing. But, since he was at his job only six hours a day, instead of eight, and since he was productive only for 2, i guess he was lazy.
He would deliver a UI he would make, without business logic, and tell it is done. Then clients would call me and ask why text fields are not saved..
This all took me month to understand. I lost time, i lost trust, and soon he was fired.
But, soon i was fired also, replaced by another two devs who i had interviewd and formed a team. I was discarded as trash, just like that. I have even worked overtime to catch up with android guys, unpaid.
Took me year to recover mentally from this.
Lessons learned: be objective when interviewing. Job is business, not friendship, trust no one, keep neutral on work. Leave honesty for someone else, honesty will be used against you. Never criticize two girls in office who disturb developers by talking about sex and dicks all the time, dressed sexy, they are girlfriends of people ranked above you. Leave code perfection for your projects.3 -
Not quite a interview question, but in a competition (I had build a compiler) the jury (they all told me they had all studied informatics) asked me what a compiler is... Not in a "lets try to catch him off manner" but rather in a "i am too stupid for this world manner" he asked me what a compiler was... And it got even worse: my compiler is based on linuxes utils (nasm+ld) the guy didnt know about linux. Assembler was much too much for him and when my compiler threw an error (I wanted to show them the error system) he told me I shouldnt present unfinished projects... Atleastthe other two were really nice and i still got 2nd place (behind a person who prorammed an Nxt thingy)7
-
I just want to share this:
When I start working at my last job, I have little idea of what a unit test was.
My boss on one meeting said that unit testing will be mandatory (wich is ok and umderstandable).
Almost a *year* after that, no one still care about them. I see myself doing them the best I can, but I saw things like wrap the assertion line with "try / catch" to lie to the coverage and unit test percentage. Or in other cases directly uploading *manually* the code on the server without test at all.
And then, as the only developer who do the unit test ok I have to do the missing ones and repair the fake ones.
Then when something explodes the question all the managers love to ask "Did we had the testing?"
At least I quit... that job was some crazy shit, this is just one story of many.
Like that other time that my co-workers did not understand why I needed to do POJOs on an android app because the big bad JSON that the app used was working fine.... -
I swear I almost had a nervous breakdown today.
Advisor at college has told me I won't be graduating until Feb 2019, I'll be 29 with a degree in IT and my minor in software engineering. I feel like I'm just playing catch up to the younger crowd who got there sooner.
On top of that all the entry level programming jobs I applied to have rejected me on the basis of not having my degree yet. They're impressed with my work but they want me out of school. I have to wait it out until I'm closer to graduating.
On good days when I code Java web applets love what I do and I wouldn't have it different, but on days like today I feel like shit and wonder if my degree was worth it, especially when I factor in that my degree only went up to pre-calc on the math end. (I'm thinking of majoring in a masters in CS as a way to makeup, maybe)
I'm frustrated and I feel the same kind of loneliness when I graduated HS. I know there's a light at the end but some days it's just hell.
I'm sure a lot of you have gone through this. Any ideas to destress?6 -
So I'm writing some multithreaded shit in C that is supposed to work cross-platform. MingW has Posix threads for Windows, so that saved already half of the platform dependency. The other half was that these threads need to run external programs.
Well, there's system(), right? Uhm yes, but it sucks. It's incredibly slow on Windows, and it looks like you can have only one system() call ongoing at the same time. Which kinda defeats the multithreaded driver. Ok, but there's CreateProcessA(), and that doesn't suck.
Fine, now for Linux. The fork/exec hack is quite ugly, but it works and is even fast. Just never use fork() without immediate exec(). First try under Cygwin... crap I fork bombed my system! What is this shit? Ah I fucked up the path names so that the external executable couldn't be run.
Lesson learnt: put an exit() right after the exec() in the path for child process. Should never be reached, but if it goes there, the exit() at least prevents a fork bomb.
Well yeah, sort of works under Cygwin, but only with up to 3 threads. Beyond that, it seems like fork() at some point gives two processes the same PID, and then shit hangs.
Even slapping a mutex around the fork and releasing it only in the parent process didn't help. Fork in Cygwin is like a fork in the ass. posix_spawn() should work better because it can be mapped more easily to the Windows model, but still no dice.
OK, testing under real Linux. Yeah, no issues with that one! But instead, I get some obscure "free(): invalid size" abort. What the fuck would that even mean?! Checking my free() calls: all fine.
Time to fire up GDB in the terminal! Put a catch on the abort signal, mh got just hex data. Shit I forgot to compile with -O0 and -g. Next try. Backtrace shows the full call trace, back to the originating line in my program - which is fclose() on a file.
Ahhh I remember! Under Linux, fclosing a file that is already closed makes the program crash. So probably I was closing it twice. Checking back.. yeah that's where it was.
Shit runs fast on several cores now!8 -
would software product companies plz start describing what the product *actually* does on their homepages? if u say ur product/framework/tool will help me leverage this or collaborate that, it's an almost zero entropy statement, because everyone says so. Are u selling coffee or a .net gui library? because both can help me make my software better and leverage whatever it's supposed to leverage .. so, pleaaase, just say what ur product does, if that doesn't sell it, using hyped catch all phrases won't either ...
oh, and stop calling ur products somethingfy or somethingly .. just stop -
Am I the only one, who likes to hate the tester for sending back your code, when I should be greatful for him/her for finding bugs?
Replies from me by the amount I get my ticket back:
1: okay, sure, thanks
2: all right
3: oh, okay
4: what? still not okay?
5: how did you even catch that?
6: what the fu** is wrong with you?
7: you again???
8: die already!
9: <singing the frozen theme> Let it go, let it go!1 -
First Rant here.
So I was working on some integration test issues when I found this by accident made by a professional level SW engineer:
@Test
public void testMethod() throws ApiException {
Response res = null;
try {
res = serviceToTest.callMethod();
} catch(Exception e) {
assertNull(res);
}
}
Was wondering why tests were being green after some code changes I've made cuz tests could have not been green afterwards.
Together with a senior (I'm also professional only) I've tried to explain him for a good 1-2hrs why this code is useless and he still did it. Good thing there are no errors in the real implementation from him after fixing the tests as it's code freeze here and we are having go live in a few days 🙃
Also luckily he isn't working on our code anymore and has only been doing so for a few weeks.
Wasted a day with it and gonna check all of his code now before I run in the next surprise.1 -
What I say:
Ah shit man! Spring break! Finally gonna be able to continue working on my personal project. Study, catch up with some books and tv shows while continuing to code!
What my wife hears:
Oh cool! Now I have someone to drive all around town getting me useless shit that I don't need while I am at work!!!
-_____________________________- -
I've had a couple of interviews that were bad because I fluffed them, but the worst was a 4 stage process I went through a while back.
Development hub for an international org, 1st stage was a phone call with high level questions. Stage 2 were online coding tests, which I passed. Third - another phone call. Finally, a visit to the office. I was informed that I was the only one to get this far after the other filtering. This is where it all went wrong.
I'd been led to believe this would be a reasonably informal chat (around an hour or so) to fill in some of the detail of what I'd already been given. It wasn't. It turned into 2+ hours of the most intense grilling I've ever had. Felt like I'd gone 12 rounds by the end. Another coding test in the middle of it. The interviewer seemed to be enjoying the opportunity to show that he knew much more than me and seemed to be trying to catch me out, rather than really discover what I knew.
By the end of it, I didn't want the job and I didn't want to report directly to someone who seemed to thrive on making life difficult to boost his own ego.1 -
Last Monday I bought an iPhone as a little music player, and just to see how iOS works or doesn't work.. which arguments against Apple are valid, which aren't etc. And at a price point of €60 for a secondhand SE I figured, why not. And needless to say I've jailbroken it shortly after.
Initially setting up the iPhone when coming from fairly unrestricted Android ended up being quite a chore. I just wanted to use this thing as a music player, so how would you do it..?
Well you first have to set up the phone, iCloud account and whatnot, yada yada... Asks for an email address and flat out rejects your email address if it's got "apple" in it, catch-all email servers be damned I guess. So I chose ishit at my domain instead, much better. Address information for billing.. just bullshit that, give it some nulls. Phone number.. well I guess I could just give it a secondary SIM card's number.
So now the phone has been set up, more or less. To get music on it was quite a maze solving experience in its own right. There's some stuff about it on the Debian and Arch Wikis but it's fairly outdated. From the iPhone itself you can install VLC and use its app directory, which I'll get back to later. Then from e.g. Safari, download any music file.. which it downloads to iCloud.. Think Different I guess. Go to your iCloud and pull it into the iPhone for real this time. Now you can share the file to your VLC app, at which point it initializes a database for that particular app.
The databases / app storage can be considered equivalent to the /data directories for applications in Android, minus /sdcard. There is little to no shared storage between apps, most stuff works through sharing from one app to another.
Now you can connect the iPhone to your computer and see a mount point for your pictures, and one for your documents. In that documents mount point, there are directories for each app, which you can just drag files into. For some reason the AFC protocol just hangs up when you try to delete files from your computer however... Think Different?
Anyway, the music has been put on it. Such features, what a nugget! It's less bad than I thought, but still pretty fucked up.
At that point I was fairly dejected and that didn't get better with an update from iOS 14.1 to iOS 14.3. Turns out that Apple in its nannying galore now turns down the volume to 50% every half an hour or so, "for hearing safety" and "EU regulations" that don't exist. Saying that I was fuming and wanting to smack this piece of shit into the wall would be an understatement. And even among the iSheep, I found very few people that thought this is fine. Though despite all that, there were still some. I have no idea what it would take to make those people finally reconsider.. maybe Tim Cook himself shoving an iPhone up their ass, or maybe they'd be honored that Tim Cook noticed them even then... But I digress.
And then, then it really started to take off because I finally ended up jailbreaking the thing. Many people think that it's only third-party apps, but that is far from true. It is equivalent to rooting, and you do get access to a Unix root account by doing it. The way you do it is usually a bootkit, which in a desktop's ring model would be a negative ring. The access level is extremely high.
So you can root it, great. What use is that in a locked down system where there's nothing available..? Aha, that's where the next thing comes in, 2 actually. Cydia has an OpenSSH server in it, and it just binds to port 22 and supports all of OpenSSH's known goodness. All of it, I'm using ed25519 keys and a CA to log into my phone! Fuck yea boi, what a nugget! This is better than Android even! And it doesn't end there.. there's a second thing it has up its sleeve. This thing has an apt package manager in it, which is easily equivalent to what Termux offers, at the system level! You can install not just common CLI applications, but even graphical apps from Cydia over the network!
Without a jailbreak, I would say that iOS is pretty fucking terrible and if you care about modding, you shouldn't use it. But jailbroken, fufu.. this thing trades many blows with Android in the modding scene. I've said it before, but what a nugget!8 -
How do you deal with massively poorly-performing and unknowledgeable teams?
For background, I've been in my current position for ~7 months now.
A new manager joined recently and he's just floored at the reality of the team.
I mean, a large portion of my interview (and his) was the existing manager explicitly warning about how much of a dumpster fire everything is.
But still, nothing prepares you for it.
We're talking things like:
- Sequential integer user ids that are passable as query string args to anonymous endpoints, thus enabling you to view the data read by that view *for any* user.
- God-like lookup tables that all manner of pieces of data are shoved into as a catch-all
- A continued focus on unnecessary stored procedures despite us being a Linq shop
- Complete lack of awareness of SOLID principles
- Actual FUD around the simplest of things like interfaces, inversion of control, dependency injection (and the list goes on).
I've been elevated into this sort of quasi-senior position (in all but title - and salary), and I find myself having to navigate a daily struggle of trying to not have an absolute shit fit every time I have to dive into the depths of some of the code.
Compounded onto that is the knowledge that most of the team are on comparable salaries (within a couple thousand) of mine, purely owing to length of service.
We're talking salaries for mid-senior level devs, for people that at market rates would command no more (if even close) than a junior rate.
The problem is that I'm aware of how bad things are, but then somehow I'm constantly surprised and confronted with ever more insane levels of shitfuckery, and... I'm getting tired.
It's been 7 months, I love the job, I'm working in the charity sector and I love the fact that the things I'm working on are directly improving people's lives, rather than lining some fintech fatcat's pockets.
I guess this was more a rant than a question, and also long time no see...
So my question is this:
- How do you deal with this?
- How do you go on without just dying inside every single day?8 -
"Alright everyone, we can't keep this up. Every day our builds are breaking because of test failures."
"We could just be more diligent devs and actually write/update tests based on new behavior we introduce to the system?"
"What? No! We're just going to get rid of all tests!"
a few days later
"Guys!!! Everything's on fire now! How didn't we catch these huge breaking changes!"
https://media3.giphy.com/media/...2 -
After two months of NPM hell I have made the decision to stop trying to catch up to this Javascript insanity.
The salary I would make if I understood this shit is not worth my sanity. Most people develop a career, but all I seem to develop is RSI and a seething hatred for humanity.1 -
Just don't open it...
Will definitely not pretend to be productive 24/7. But the below help me reach a satisfactory 8/5 most day's.
- Exercise in the morning
- Eat breakfast
- Listen to good music
- Make sure to have fun moments throughout the workday (++ for initiating)
- Catch air, have a walk, take a break
- Minimize interactions with toxic people
- Be open in sharing knowledge, thoughts, work , good people will repay you
- Get in the kitchen, cook nice healthy meals
- Set concrete and reachable targets
- Remain eager to learn
- Celebrate successes
- Spent time with friends and family
- Catch enough sleep
And above all, DON'T open devRant!!! -
Most painful code error you've made?
More than I probably care to count.
One in particular where I was asked to integrate our code and converted the wrong value..ex
The correct code was supposed to be ...
var serviceBusMessage = new Message() {ID = dto.InvoiceId ...}
but I wrote ..
var serviceBusMessage = new Message() {ID = dto.OrderId ...}
At the time of the message bus event, the dto.OrderId is zero (it's set after a successful credit card transaction in another process)
Because of a 'true up' job that occurs at EOD, the issue went unnoticed for weeks. One day the credit card system went down and thousands of invoices needed to be re-processed, but seemed to be 'stuck', and 'John' was tasked to investigate, found the issue, and traced back to the code changes.
John: "There is a bug in the event bus, looks like you used the wrong key and all the keys are zero."
Me: "Oh crap, I made that change weeks ago. No one noticed?"
John: "Nah, its not a big deal. The true-up job cleans up anything we missed and in the rare event the credit card system goes down, like now. No worries, I can fix the data and the code."
<about an hour later I'm called into a meeting>
Mgr1: "We're following up on the credit card outage earlier. You made the code changes that prevented the cards from reprocessing?"
Me: "Yes, it was my screw up."
Mgr1: "Why wasn't there a code review? It should have caught this mistake."
Mgr2: "All code that is deployed is reviewed. 'Tom' performed the review."
Mgr1: "Tom, why didn't you catch that mistake."
Tom: "I don't know, that code is over 5 years old written by someone else. I assumed it was correct."
Mgr1: "Aren't there unit tests? Integration tests?"
Tom: "Oh yea, and passed them all. In the scenario, the original developers probably never thought the wrong ID would be passed."
Mgr1: "What are you going to do so this never happens again?"
Tom: "Its an easy addition to the tests. Should only take 5 minutes."
Mgr1: "No, what are *you* going to do so this never happens again?"
Me: "It was my mistake, I need to do a better job in paying attention. I knew what value was supposed to passed, but I screwed up."
Mgr2: "No harm no foul. We didn't lose any money and no customer was negativity affected. Credit card system may go down once, or twice a year? Nothing to lose sleep over. Thanks guys."
A week later Mgr1 fires Tom.
I feel/felt like a total d-bag.
Talking to 'John' later about it, turns out Tom's attention to detail and 'passion' was lacking in other areas. Understandable since he has 2 kids + one with special-needs, and in the middle of a divorce, taking most/all of his vacation+sick time (which 'Mgr1' dislikes people taking more than a few days off, that's another story) and 'Mgr1' didn't like Tom's lack of work ethic (felt he needed to leave his problems at home). The outage and the 'lack of due diligence' was the last straw.1 -
Startup-ing 101, from Fitbit:
- spy on users
- sell data
- cut production costs
- mutilate people's bodies, leaving burn scars that will never heal
- announce the recall, get PR, and make the refund process impossibly convoluted
- never give actual refunds
- claim that yes, fitbit catches fire, but only the old discontinued device, just to mess with search results and make the actual info (that all devices catch fire) hard to find
- try hard to obtain the devices in question, so people who suffered have no evidence
- give bogus word salad replies to the press
This is what one of the people burned has to say:
"I do not have feeling in parts of my wrist due to nerve damage and I will have a large scar that will be with me the rest of my life. This was a traumatic experience and I hope no one else has to go through it. So, if you own a Fitbit, please reconsider using it."
Ladies and gentlemen, cringefest starts. One of fitbit replies:
"Fitbit products are designed and produced in accordance with strict standards and undergo extensive internal and external testing to ensure the safety of our users. Based on our internal and independent third party testing and analysis, we do not believe this type of injury could occur from normal use. We are committed to conducting a full investigation. With Google's resources and global platform, Fitbit will be able to accelerate innovation in the wearables category, scale faster, and make health even more accessible to everyone. I could not be more excited for what lies ahead".
In the future, corporate speech will be autogenerated.
(if you wear fitbit, just be aware of this.)14 -
A piece of code someone just pushed:
In pseudocode
------------------------
Function foo()
Result = GetFoo()
If result != null
DoStuff()
Return result
Else
Result = null
--------------------------
Ffs.
It's written in a strongly typed language, and the whole function is in a try with an empty catch and inside yet another try with an empty catch. Guess he wanted to be sure no error got away....
Oh, and he has 9 years of experience, and since all paths don't return something it does not compile12 -
Me: Why are we spending time building reports for Support? AFAIK they never read or use them.
Boss: Seems they expect you to do it.
Me: Then what exactly are they supposed to be doing? All the issues seem to just escalate back to us.... We should just make sure issues never get into PROD
Boss: I agree, they're always firefighting... we gave them more funding so eventually they should catch up **Me: I highly doubt it, you should just stop hiring monkeys** esp. if we prevent PROD issues.
Me: Yea... we should prevent production issues because someone always has to pay off the (technical) debt and interest rates in PROD are very high6 -
Like someone else already mentioned here, remember that interview goes both ways: youre there to gauge wether workplace suits you or no. Always ask to meet teamleads/project leads or potential colleagues before accepting the job and try talking with them.
I applied to 3 jobs and in all of them managers did put a brave face and told me lots of bs just to get me accept the job. Managers live in their own world, sometimes they dont even know what you will be working on.
Once I accepted a job and got stuck with a perfectionist teamlead for 8 months which could have been avoided given I had the chance to catch the bad vibes during the interview.
Another time I accepted a job and had to work with a backend guy for one year and his accent was so thick+stuttering that I had trouble in understanding anything he says. Every conversation felt like trivia contest. I wish I had knew that stuff before accepting the job -
Anyone reading these emails we are sending?
I work at a small place. A few users are using an application at our place that I develop and maintain. We all work remotely.
I announce by email to these few users a new version release of said application because of low level changes in the database, send the timeline for the upgrade, I include the new executable, with an easy illustrated 2 minutes *howto* to update painlessly.
Yet, past the date of the upgrade, 100% of the application users emailed me because they were not able to use the software anymore.
----------------
Or I have this issue where we identified a vulnerability in our systems - and I send out an email asking (as soon as possible) for which client version users are using to access the database, so that I patch everything swiftly right. Else everything may crash. Like a clean summary, 2 lines. Easy. A 30 second thing.
A week pass, no answer, I send again.
Then a second week pass, one user answers, saying:
> well I am busy, I will have time to check this out in February.
----------------
Then I am asking myself:
* Why sending email at all in the first place?
* Who wrote these 'best practices textbooks about warning users on schedule/expected downtime?'
*How about I just patch and release first and then expect the emails from the users *after* because 'something is broken', right? Whatever I do, they don't read it.
Oh and before anyone suggest that I should talk to my boss about this behavior from the users, my boss is included in the aforementioned 'users'.
Catch-22 much ? Haha thanks for reading
/rant7 -
I take the train well out side of rush hour when the trains are about half empty (though most seats taken). I have to come in because it's not like I can afford to have a workspace comparable to the cockpit of the millennium falcon both at home and at work.
I don't believe going into a panic about coronavirus but take obvious basic precautions to at least reduce the chance and slow the spread and that should do a good amount to reduce overloading the system. I kid you not, at this point medical facilities are considering buying diving equipment for enriched O2 supplies to keep up.
Today, as usual, some fucking piece of shit cunt twat psycho beggar that literally needs to be in an asylum with a massive fucking great gob of snot dangling out his nose is going up the entire train, every carriage, begging groping every hand rail along the way and potentially exposing several hundred people every hour.
I told this sorry sack of shit, surprisingly politely, that he'll end up rapidly spreading coronavirus if he keeps going all the way up and down the carriage like that. After he's fucking muttering on trying to make people feel bad about fucking ignoring him not being all caring and shit and then doesn't give a shit about giving everyone coronavirus after fucking waltzing down the entire fucking length of the train his pockets stuffed with coin. Then he threatens to assault me. I was fucking this > < far away from unleashing a life changing beat down and kicking his ass off the train with no pain or injury spared.
At the same time, that piece of scum waste of skin the mayor has apparently informed the public that you can't get coronavirus on the train or buses. How the fuck did he come to that conclusion? Is this really happening? How can something that clinically fucking thick as shit be our lord and master?
I fucking thought the great toilet paper rush was brain dead. Jesus fucking Christ and people voted for this fucking championship moron. Why don't they just all save themselves the fucking hassle and all march themselves off a fucking cliff?
These dumb shits without two neurons to rub together only need to put a dozen or so plain clothed police offices on the trains to catch these fuckers.
Why am I even fucking paying taxes? Where's it all fucking going? Another fucking lets give a billion quid to Fujitsu fucking failed IT project again I bet. Can't people bloody do anything these days? Does there have to be an app for fucking everything?
Someone should make a fucking facial recognition app so I can snap a shot of these fuckers and then if one of these fucking passes the phone camera anyone else with the app it'll set of there's a fucking imbecile in the vicinity alert.
These people need to be dragged out into the street, lined up against the wall and shot. No remorse. Toss them in a pit, cover it with dirt and be done with it. Why even bother with the execution? Throw them down the hole and fill it with dirt.
You don't have to go mental like it's the plague but people could at least show some fucking common sense, common decency and basic decorum. Even minimal measures, is that much to ask? Absolute scum of the Earth. How we even allow them to walk to Earth I do not fucking know.1 -
I started learning Golang today and really like it.
The error handling is *excellent*. It always works the same way and is standardized, unlike the hell that NodeJS error handling is (.catch(), try).
Modules confused the fuck out of me. I eventually figured out how they worked, but Go really doesn't try to make it easy to have multiple source folders...
I'll probably be re-writing my Discord Bot in Golang soon. Being able to have just one binary output will make things infinitely easier. Compile-time variables are another feature that's nice and easy to implement.
The goal is only having to upload a single binary to deploy on production from my CI script that has all keys and stuff inside. Feels good to finally throw all that old bad JS code out and starting completely fresh.7 -
Student here.
For those who got a degree in CS or similar, what is some advice you can offer to a sophomore in school?
The education I have gotten so far for a Software Engineering degree seems like it isn't enough. So far, I only know C++ and front end web development. Besides the little tiny projects they give us, they do not teach us how the field works.
One of my most lingering questions of all is.. what technologies should I know before interning and/or job hunting?!?! There are dozens of languages for everything; I'm lost. I feel the pain for developers in the future who have to catch up on technologies.
I have heard that learning C++ will make it easier to learn other languages. I won't know until I start another language (too busy working in the summers).
What regrets do you have? What do you wish you could've known while studying as a student or self-teaching yourself?8 -
Sit down to do a math lab in Maple on university computers. Struggle for a while with shitty software. Click on a help link provided by Maple for an error I was getting.
BSOD outta nowhere.
Hadn't saved my work. And Maple was developed by the best university in Canada. I hope they all catch something rare and incurable and die.4 -
Pokemon GO is a trend as if I need to tell you all that. But people are now making money out of it.
www.pokewalk.com is the funniest thing I ever saw today. The site claims that it will walk for you and catch them all. No worries about the battery of your mobile...they will charge it as they collect.
Are you serious?? Where's the fun in that?? Professional walkers cmon !!??8 -
Cannot understand those who are frustrated with it.
Sure, one can feel frustration when some project is not going as they were supposed to go, but that is life for ya, boi.
Without wanting to offend anyone it feels like devs who complain so much either do not actively search for a solution and learn shit properly and cry their soul out afterwards or they do search, but cannot find anything.
Patience is the solution. Do not let yourself fall down and stay strong.
Even if it takes a lot of willpower, retries, inner pain, patience and non-sleepy nights, you will and can do it. I believe in you.
My whole life was basically a psychological disaster.
I have had and still have depression and a lot of short frustrations from time to time, too, but I do not cry it out loud.
My high school is fucked up. In every single aspect. I am doing all-nighters almost every day. With maybe half an hour of sleep to get school projects done on time.
I cannot just say "fuck you. I am not gonna do this shit" to school, because that would affect my grades in a negative way. Same thing applies to you, as an employee, too. But at least you do not need to be afraid of getting bad grades.
Bad grades->not getting the desired degree->bad chance of finding a job
In your case:
Bad communication with boss->bad connection->bad chance of finding a job
But is that really so?
I do not think so. Nonetheless, you still can have a good chance of finding a job, if you have proven yourself to others in a great way. Everyone has bad times. Even with their bosses. That's normal. Being bad with someone does not make yourself bad in general.
The job world will still accept you, but school won't accept you again. Whenever I feel like the burnout is about to catch me, I take an immediate break and go outside. Take a walk in the sunset. Go to the forest. Run with music playing loudly. Swim. And other things like watching the stars in the silence of the night.
To finally come to an end here...
Do not make yourself feel bad that quickly and try to endure the pain. This is going to make you a better and stronger person.
If you cannot do it anymore (hitting the borders of burnout), take your time and do whatever makes you happy and treat yourself.
Life is not all about work. Were you born to be a worker? No. Were you born to be a slave of others? No.
What is holding you then? Let go of all the stress (for a minute). You are free.
You are a great person.
Do not forget that.7 -
Client doesn't want me to use internet, while connecting to their vpn to code. It's a security 'violation', it seems. Do they think I am Denise Richie to code without internet? And the catch is I code for OpenFlow with OpenNetworkLinux+OpenNIE. I mean, do they even understand what Open means in all these?11
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There is someone in our building who urinates like a watering can.; all over the place. Do you think I will get caught if I try to get a DNA match, or install a CCTV to catch the culprit?14
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3 straight days with less than 3 hours of sleep per night. If something or someone wakes me in the first fifteen minutes as I'm drifting off, that's it, my wired for however long.
Previous two nights I just barely slept at all. Last night got awakened twice as I was drifting off. To start with, its ettypre for me to be able to fall asleep at all a second time.
Last three nights I'm not actually sure I even slept. I blinked and it was morning and I woke up exhausted. Only thing I can remember is racing thoughts, as I fell asleep, and the very same exact thoughts *as* I woke up, as if my brain had been thinking the same thing on a loop for a few hours, while I was catatonic and unable to fully shut down, stuck in 'on' mode all night and not realizing it.
Not a single fucking job I work honor's their god damn promises, let alone my repeated requests for night shift.
Was so exhausted yesterday my chest hurt.
How am I supposed to drive to work on less than 9 hours asleep spread out across three days? Cant catch a fuckong break lately, and when I do it's like the universe fucking sabotages me with shit like this.6 -
"Pokemon Let's Go" review:
I knew it would be a very easy game, made to transition Pokemon Go players to the core series of games, but this game is just poorly thought out. The multiplayer was obviously an afterthought; there is no split-screen. When the other player goes off-screen, they are lost off camera. Player 2 cannot interact with anything: they cannot talk to people, collect items, or initiate battles (They walk right through Pokemon)
The game is too easy by design. You cannot fight wild Pokemon, so you end up having 6 Pokemon by the beginning of the game all at full health (And everything gets XP when you catch something, so most of your Pokemon will be up to level 6-10 by your first battles) and the opposition will only have one level 3-4 Pokemon.
This trend continues throughout the game.
The map is tiny. You could walk the whole thing in an hour. Even Gameboy Pokemon maps were larger.
I knew this going into it, but it only has gen 1, which means pretty much no Pokemon, and they're the ones that I'm bored of. Every shitty game starts with generation 1 pokemon then ever introduces anything else. I'm sick of pidgeys!
Plus the hefty price tag of $60 just makes this game not worth much, despite the hype they tried to give it. That's probably why they were to secretive about the gameplay before launch: they knew it was bad,6 -
So my friend who is currently attending University to major in Computer Science just started programming Java a few days ago. His first assignment was to learn bubble sort and make it organize a table of certain values provided in the assignment with a few other items on the side. Apparently, he was stressing over the assignment and waited till the last night to do this, and was running on 2 hours of sleep. Anyways, a few days pass and he received a 0% on the assignment with the comment "See me on Monday." and questioned what he did wrong (They use GitHub to submit their assignments, even though other classes at the University just commit to the University Server for Computer Science), and asked me to review the code. When I started looking at the code, all he managed to do was just make two tables, one that would print the unsorted table, and then print the "sorted" table. Plus, the catch that got him in trouble, he named his package "fuckthisshit", how does one not realize that when they're submitting their assignments... like seriously? Like I can understand the 2 hours of sleep, but with 1000s of examples out there, how do you manage to fake bubble sort plus end up naming a package "fuckthisshit" and question why he got a 0%. I do feel bad for him in the long run since there aren't many assignments in this class so this was worth 25%.
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I have to make a big decision about my future as a developer...
(Long rant)
I am currently in an apprenticeship as a dev.
The thing is i was forced to do testautomatization.
I was there for half a year and had a good time.
But now my trainer (the guy who assigned me all the work and showed me all the stuff I learned) has been fired.
And now it sucks... they don't teach me new things anymore and don't give me time to catch up with the new technologies.
(This was different in the past!)
I was forced to do manual testing for the past few week.
Therefor i am working with a friend and his trainer.
One day i was talking to my friend about how things have changed in the testing-team.
His trainer was listening (we did not know) and sayed: If you want i can ask my boss if it is possible that i can teach you as well.
Now the point is i woud love to work with him. I love the work they do!! (Java; don't hate me)
But it will make the testing guys mad and I dont know how HR will react.
I am pretty sure it will reduce my chances of getting a job (at this company) if I change the team...
Should I talk to HR or not? What do you think?
Thanks for reading and sorry for my english bugs.6 -
OK people, I don't need a novel written for every line of code, but PLEASE STOP trying to tell me that "yOuR coDe sHouLd bE sELf dOcUmeNtiNg aNd cOmMenTs mEaN iT's aUtoMaTiCaLLy bAd". That's a bunch of BS. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've saved my own butt by dropping a "this call can't be awaited; causes the library's internal API to throw an error" comment in my C#, or a "can't use double quotes here; doesn't work right for some reason" line in my JavaScript. Sometimes there are very good but un-obvious reasons why something was done a certain way, even though it looks like it could be done better. And don't try to tell me "the tests will catch it". Let's be realistic here, nobody has 100% test coverage on any project that's much more than "Hello World". And even if the tests DID catch it, why waste the time when you could just write a comment?
P.S.: This is not directed at anyone on here specifically. It's directed at all the devs I've met IRL and the comments I've seen on SO, who think that comments must be bad.12 -
https://devrant.com/rants/3140022/...
So I just realised it's been a while and I haven't updated this story.
So the job mentioned in the previous post did not work out. Things were tough for a while after that but then all of a sudden I had 4 interviews back to back. I guess everyone got the 2021 budgets and suddenly knew they could afford me.
So had an interview at a small company, only 6km from my house. A week later second interview, another week later, when I had the other 3 lined up as well, third interview as they wanted to physically meet me. The first two were digital.
They also only offered me 47% of my previous salary but they said there was a salary review after probation (3 months) and another at the 6 month mark.
Another interview was for more just a general "the printer's not working" type job. I went for that interview as at the time, I'd take anything that paid enough to cover the bills. They also made me an offer for 47% of my prev salary. I turned them down as I was about to sign for the other gig. I recommended my brother and he got the job.
The monday of that week I had an interview at a bigger company. They called on 11th Nov offering almost the same as my last salary and wanted me to start on the 1st of Dec. So I took that one as it was double the other two. I then got delayed by 2 days with starting because they were having trouble getting my equipment sorted. All's well now.
It's a support job, not dev but it's internal 2nd line so at least it's not customer facing. They want to grow me into an RPA role, which I'm down for. I figure I'll kill 6 months doing that and worm my way into microservices.
The forth company, I didn't even actually for the interview, it kept on getting delayed and by the time they came op with a date, I had already signed my current contract.
Overall, the job is not what I expected but it was a godsend as I was about to sign for half as much money. Finally, I can pay all my bills, catch up on debts and even save a bit!
Thanks for the support and encouragement from those of you who have been following this story -
Am i whiny or is resilience so glorified in this field?
I am a junior developer. I was assigned with two projects together with a friend and a senior. My friend and I finished our assigned tasks way before the deadline. Fast forward, my senior got reassigned to a different project since we are lacking with manpower. Naturally, his transactions were assigned to me and my friend. And my goodness, his existing codes are a piece of shit! It's all over the place. His variable naming is shit, his codes are all around the place, his codes doesn't even follow our company's coding standards, no try catch, a lot of unsafe practices. In short, cleaning his code is a pain in the ass and my friend and I got really busy with cleaning his mess. The testing of our system is really near but I just thought that maybe he's really busy with the other project that's why the quality of his codes deteriorated.
He's not. One day, I saw his in discord that he's playing during work hours lol. And the worse part is that he is playing with our boss! YES. DURING WORK HOURS. I got mad but I couldn't say anything because he is really tight with the boss.
Later on that day, we had our meeting. I was surprised when my boss told me that she's expecting that the excel part of our system is already finished. A little background here, my boss asked me to study Excel VB. However, I didnt get to study that much because I was so busy fixing bugs and after that came the cleaning of our senior's shit codes.
So I tried to say these things to my boss but I was cut out by the same senior shouting "You can do it!" over and over again. No one listened to what I was trying to say! And to make it even worse, the boss had a very proud look on her face and she even had the audacity to tell me that I'm lucky I have such a good support system. I dont.
Now, the company is planning to put me in a very demanding project. I havent finished cleaning up my senior's codes, I havent started anything with the excel and the deadline is next week!
The boss told me that even if I enter the other project, that I will still be responsible for the Excel part of our system. So fucking shoot me in the face.They were telling me that I should have a good time management system, that I should be flexible, that I should adapt easily, yada yada yada. She just makes you feel bad about yourself if you're not as 'flexible' as her.
The thing is, even if I have the best time management techniques in the world, if you bombard me with a shitload of tasks, then I won't be able to do it properly! I don't even take breaks anymore! I work literally 8 hours a day, even more than that. And I dont understand, why the hell is she overworking me when her friend (the senior dev) is just playing during work hours?
Another funniest thing is that she told us that when we encounter technical problems, we should ask our senior dev. Oh boy, if only she knows how shitty his codes are.6 -
No error handling at all, not even a single try catch. Program crashes when the wind changes direction. Previous developer developed his test plan around his bugs. 😭1
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(Keep in mind I am 16 and I have never had an internship or a job)
I have a potential internship that I can partake in over the summer. It is a mainly front-end job and it is paying 15-20$ an hour. However, the one catch but they use WordPress to code all of their client's sites. I have tried to use WordPress before and I have not had much fun. I feel it is more confusing than it has to be. Should I try again and relearn it to get some early job opportunity and expand my portfolio or should I try freelance work instead?
If you vote WP could you link some good ways to learn it?13 -
Sony.
I don’t *hate* them, but I had really high hopes for Xperia smartphones back then, five years ago.
So I saved up and bought one. That’s what I got:
1. It was getting slower and slower
2. Micro usb broke just months after I got the smartphone
3. Sticky fragile screen with absolutely no oleophobic coating
4. NO UPDATES TO KITKAT AND LOLLIPOP! They just left us behind!
5. The main reason.
I catch moments with my camera. For me, camera is a vital feature, the most significant factor.
I once needed it really urgent and it just said “Camera is unavailable”. And that’s all. Camera is gone forever, broken. Factory reset haven’t fixed it.
You, alongside with Meizu, turned me away from android irreversibly and forever. When I heard about no update, I literally felt abused. Just like a girl whom random fuckboy made a proposal to, fucked and then left just months later.
With that level of customer support, basic respect to me as a user and buyer and that level of quality control, fuck you and your sloppy bricks you call smartphones. Maybe things are changing now, but I don’t care anymore and hardly ever will.
P.S. it heats up as hell, fucking pocket stoverant xperia abandonware android xperia tx hate abandoned wk130 android update customer support updates sony3 -
Android development sucks assssssssssss.
They FINALLY made a design system that doesn't look ugly so I thought might as well upgrade my old apps to it.
Publish and tonnnnes of crashes hours after launch.
Test on older devices and turns out some @color/material_xyz was missing in a lower API code BUT available in higher ones? No fallback, no error in AndroidStudio, just a runtime crash. Amazing
Then the location permissions glitch up. On lower androids even if you aren't actively tracking the user, the system tries to call some method which if you haven't overridden, the app crashes at launch.
And no amount of wrapping in try-catch-ignore helps (https://stackoverflow.com/questions... helped)
OH AND THEN the above solution if used on latest Android code33, CRASHES ON RUNTIME. so more sets of 'if VCODE this then ask this else that' bullshit.
I don't even need location it's just for better ad money ffs.
I've been team-android since Froyo and hate apple's monopoly, but if this is the level of their competence, many will jump ship sooner or later.
PS: yes I know I should've checked for lower versions before hand but Im not gonna make 8 android VMs to test all when different things fail in different versions.
I did have to do that in the end, but for a meh pet project one shouldn't have to. The system should have enough fallbacks and graceful fails.3 -
Ok apparently I forgot rants can only be edited within the first 5 minutes, I thought it was 30, and you can't rant 2 times in 2 hours so I'll have to wait before posting this.
So, I'm doing a Genetic Algorithms class, something I liked since I was 15 yo and didn't know shit about coding, but I loved the carykh videos about it. (here is part 1: https://youtu.be/GOFws_hhZs8 )
The yearly class consisted of 3 little projects to be able to do the final exam and an investigation project to pass the subject without a final exam.
We had to make teams, and I got together with 5 more people.
I have a lot to say about these 5 people, but the only thing I'll say is that I was the most experienced programmer among the 6 of us, if they had any experience at all. Mind this is a third cycle class.
We were allowed to use any technology, as long as we wrote the important algorithms by hand, of course.
The development of the first project was such a mess, that one of the members left the subject.
While developing the second one, we were given the topic for the investigation project; fractals.
It took a lot for us to find an application of fractals where we could use genetic algorithms. Once we found it, fractal antennas, we had to learn about antennas, so we interviewed professionals, and such. We ended up learning to evaluate antennas.
We also found a site that used some parameters to generate fractals, we had the parameterization.
We just had to code it. It was July and we just had to code it by October.
We were 5 people, and "we" were so busy writing the little projects, we fucking couldn't finish the investigation project.
We just had to write the proper algorithms and GUI specifics, without even having to write boilerplate (we used the first project as a template), and they still took so much that we didn't have time for the important project.
That sucked, because I had been coding and investigating in many weekends, I spent countless hours on them, I had to pause development on other projects for these ones; and after all that we have to do the (very shitty) final exam.
Since May, the average people together "working" on the different projects was 2.6. And 100% of the time, I was one of them.
We tried to speed up things in the last months but even with the deadline on us and the project not even started, there was no time we all got to work together.
Dude projects don't just get made, someone has to develop them.
It's so sad we had the project ready to be made and 5 people couldn't finish it. There was so little to do to pass and yet these people couldn't.
I guess it's my bad too. I wish I could rush the project in a couple of weeks, but unfortunately the guy with a job and 8 other subjects can't.
You can find the project in my GitHub. I'll do a requiem of what it was to be one of these days, after I catch up with all I left aside for this subject...rant genetic algorithms project systems engineering failure subject college investigation fractals wk2833 -
Small company, sole engineer. Non-tech management. Increasingly fancy job titles despite working alone most of the time, with the promise of hiring someone (again) I can actually manage soon.
Backlog of projects/tasks is truly a mindfuck, with new things being added each week. This backlog will never ever get done, and nothing matters anyway because the next idea is "the future", all the time.
While I have influence on some aspects of decision making, it usually ends up being what the boss wants. Actively opposed a project because it's just too big of an undertaking, it was forced through anyway. I'm trying to keep the scope manageable as I'm building it now, and it's hard.
"It's the future, we absolutely have to do this. It will be the biggest thing we've ever done."
Boss's excitement then quickly faded since it's actually in development, now nobody really seems to want to know where it's at, or how it will all work. I need to scope it out, with the knowledge that many decisions boss signed off will be questioned when he actually looks at it. We now have even more "exciting" ideas of utter grandeur. Stuff that I can't even begin to comprehend the complexity of, while struggling to keep a self imposed deadline on the current one.
Every single morning we sit on Zoom for a "valuable" "catch-up". This is absolutely perfect for one thing: Completely destroying whatever drive and focus I have going into the day. Unrelated topics, marketing conversations, even more ideas, ideas for ideas sake, small problems blown out of proportion, the list goes on. I recently argued in detail why it should be scrapped or at least be optional to attend. No luck, it's "valuable".
Today a new idea was announced, and we absolutely have to do it ASAP because it can only be better than the current solution. I raise my concerns, saying it's not as easy as you make it out to be, we should properly think about it. Nope! We'll botch something to prove that it works... So you'll base your decision whether it's good on some half ass botch job that nobody really has the mental capacity to actually pay attention to. What a reliable way to measure!
"Our analytics data isn't useful enough to tell us the impact of things we do. We (you) have to fix this." Over the last 2 or so years, I've been pushing for an overhaul and expansion of our data analysis capabilities for exactly this reason. Integrating different data sources into a unified solution so we can easily see what we're doing, etc. Nope, never happened.
The new project idea which is based on wild assumptions is ALWAYS more important than the groundwork.
Now when I mentioned that this is what I wanted to do all along, it got brushed aside. "We don't need to do anything complicated, just fix this, add that, and it's done. It should be an easy thing to do. This is very important for our decision making." Fine, have it your way.
I'm officially burned out. It's so fucking hard to get myself to focus on my work for more than an hour or two. I started a side project, and even that effort is falling victim to my day-job-induced apathy.
I'm tempted to hand in my resignation without another offer on the table. I just need time to rediscover my passion, and go job hunting from that position, instead of the utter desperation of right now.
If you've read through all this rambling, kudos to you!8 -
My job environment is either fucked up or am too young to understand what a job life is.
I was hired to intern for a startup having 2 main bosses/founders . one of them is mostly administrative and comes to office daily. He sets some tasks and i have to complete them, as soon as possible or sometimes till a deadline. He has little knowledge about the complexity of wotk so usually he says "just complete it as soon as possible so we could release it" but we haven't pushed any updates since i joined (of course i have completed some tasks, but they are just not pushed to the release version)
The other one , as i ranted previously is a completely different story.I think he is an elder bro or senior of the other boss,but he is just a superman: dealing with the distributers, commanding the hardware ppl, discussing with the othr boss, handling the server and most importantly the guy who wrote all the code i am working on. So he comes extremely rarely(1 or 2 days / week) , tries to communicate with me , but is immediately diverted by some other call/person and goes away.
The problem is : am feeling a little helpless. They give me tasks and i start working on them with excitement .( I don't believe myself to be a terrible beginner: i have been learning/working on android development for past 1 year, i know my things. And even if i don't, i know how to search/debug and produce results) . So as usual, i start and try to apply my skills / search for things i don't / try to understand his large,overwhelming and confusing codebase and at the end am stuck at some point where i don't understand what to do next. Sometimes its a bug which doesn't seems to fix, sometimes its a thing thats in the codebase but i couldn't find or sometimes it's just something i couldn't seem to understand why isn't it working. At that time, I only wish that boss to be here and look at what and how i have done, if its a correct approch and how can we together take it to completion (or simply wtf am i doing wrong, see my shit and tell me) .
But again, the tech boss is busy or wouldn't have time to understand my problem in our short , incomplete meetings. But he or the nontech boss will definitely have the time to ask the sttus of project and pressurise for the "deadline" .
Like today, i was so stuck at this fucking one line error that i couldn't detect that i just messaged him that am leaving for home 3 hours early. He came running and for the first time in history gave me a complete undisturbed time. It was such a small mistake, but i wasn't able to catch on my own. But when i told him, he immediately caught , changed a single line and the code started to work.
I am feeling irritated. Is this all a correct environment?2 -
Feeling like a stupid shithead bc all the new hires are smarter and get thru the training wayyy faster than I do. Spending hours after work to catch up, will this get any better????9
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(inspired by another rant I read here)
Last semester we were learning Java in the Programming Fundamentals class and a friend of mine asked for help with an assignment.
The objective was to make a virtual store (as a console app) in which the user would be able to select a few products, customize some of them and then the program would print out a receipt, with a list of all products, their prices, and the total cost.
Simple enough I thought, but there was a catch: you were not allowed to use arrays because the teacher hadn't taught that to the class yet. So I was like "how the fuck are you supposed to do this then?". Turns out the way to do it was to just append text to a string in order to generate the receipt. This is stupidly simple, so stupid that it didn't even cross my mind.
It's just that it's an awful way to architecture your code, it's just plain shit. Sure, if you're learning programming that's completely ok, but using that code on production is just completely unfeasible and I think that's why it didn't even cross my mind to do it this way. I'm just constantly worrying about performance and good code architecture and organization that the simplest of all solutions slipped my mind. When I finally discovered the way the teacher wanted us to do it I just wanted to kill myself...3 -
Fuck, I'll always be a noob. Knowing next to nothing about software development, hacking, exploits - just anything.
Felt a bit proud to had reached the level "hacker" on hack the box. Was fun solving stego, crypto and reversing challenges, diving into assembly the first time. Felt cool stepping through a disassemblied executable with radare, and understanding what a NOP slide is...
However all the illusion crumbled down, when I watched this CCC talk on OpenBSD security, where the speaker was underwhelmed with one of OpenBSD mitigations, where they tried to disallow them: "NOP slides?! Srly? No one is using that anymore. Just look at current exploits."
I felt so stupid, which I probably am. Will never catch up with those guys.
But whatever. In the end we all know nothing. We have no clue, but some are more apt in disguising it behind big speech.
(really like this German song: https://youtube.com/watch/...
Those lines always give me a chuckle:
"Man has no idea.
The house has no idea.
The tree has no idea.
The fawn has no idea.
The squid has no idea.
The tapir knows, but doesn't tell us.")3 -
A dev found a bug I created where I set a SQL parameter name to @OrderID instead of the expected @Order. The standard is @OrderID, there is one stored proc where it's @Order.
Oops...I didn't catch it because the integration test didn't cover that area of the code. My mistake...I should have checked...I take complete responsibility for the screw up.
He let me know by email..
"When refactoring, from now on check the stored procedure parameters, there are a few that don't follow the standard."
I was like "from now on..."? ...wow....bold comment from someone responsible for code that doesn't check for nulls, doesn't log errors, and relies on exceptions for flow control. You wouldn't even have known about the error if I didn't modify your code to log the error (the try..except returned false)
I really wanted to reply ...
"Fixed. From now on, when you come across those easily found bugs, go head and fix it, write a test, and move on. Don't send a condescending email to me, my boss, your boss, all the DBAs, and the entire fracking order processing team. Thanks."
But..I thanked him for finding and letting me know...we're a team..blah blah blah..
Frack..people suck.1 -
Finally got to catch up on last week's episode of Mr. Robot...I must say, Elliott got my mind messed up with all those illusions. O.o2
-
As I already said on devrant, I'm a freelance web developer and I also often sell my services for teaching, loving that. Currently I'm teaching PHP with 30 students and it's going very well.
But yesterday, I received an offer for giving another course next month, this time on HTML and CSS, for a company I don't know yet. Almost every line of this email is wrong, outdated by 20 years, or just basically meaningless...
So I thought I could do my best to translate this as close as possible to the original, preserving the wrong formulations too, just for you devranters fellas.
"Hello,
I have an offer for a 2 days course for 5 people (level 1+ and/or 2), on HTML5 and CSS3. Below, the program :
1. XHTML AND CSS2 INTRODUCTION
Advantages and benefits of change
Understanding compatibility for different versions of browsers
HTML, XHTML, CSS edition tools : presentation of the different tools
The CSS language : different types of selectors : class of selector, identifier of selector, contextual selectors, grouped selectors
Blocks of text, boxes of text
The CSS1, CSSP, CSS2 properties
Relative and absolute measures units
2. LAYOUT TECHNIQUES
Full CSS, XHTML websites demo
Positioning with the position property, positioning with the float property
Columns creation
Layout for forms
Layout for data tables
Layout for menus
3. INTRODUCTION TO SVG (SCALABLE VECTOR GRAPHICS)
Role and importance of SVG
Using SVG on client side : basic shapes
SVG structure of document, tags examples
Using CSS styles with SVG
Different integration methods for SVG in a XHTML document
4. OPTIMISATION OF JAVASCRIPT CODE
Introduction to DOM and Javascript
Access to document objects : different access techniques, using this keyword, create elements dynamically
Positioning elements with the help of Javascript : positionning elements relatively to the mouse, move elements
Show/hide elements for creating hierarchical menus
Code optimisation techniques : using objects, objects litterals, loops optimisation
Can you please give me your availability ?"
Seriously...
CSS-fucking-1 ! Is it a course for dinosaurs ?
...And if only my rant was just about the program...
It's totally impossible to cover all these subjects in only 2 days with people of different levels and experience.
The guy exactly said to me : "don't worry about the program, it's an old text but they agreed to it anyway. They just want to learn HTML and CSS, some of them already know it but want to learn more, and the others are total beginers.".
And here is the meaning for the "(level 1+ and/or 2)" part in the email.
So... Surprizingly, I accepted the offer, but asked for at least a 3rd day. I'm waiting for their answer, but I'll do it anyway, adapting the course content to the actual students knowledge. I need the money, after all.
Wish me luck...
It's just sad that these formation companies are selling bullshit to clients that just want to learn something useful. It's too often like that, they sell shitty/useless programs and we have to catch up in real time with students that don't understand why they don't learn what was told to them.3 -
One of the perks of directly working with the CEO is that sometimes he goes on business trips so you pretty much catch up on medium articles all day lol2
-
Be me, get a consultant job, go to a supposedly great client that has fame of getting scouted by Google. (attn: I doubted all this shit before I started)
Learn the basics by a awesome mentor and trial/error stuff at the same time to get the hang of things, after that was done, I noticed there was no documentation whatsoever, code is spaghetti and your documentation, good luck!
Royal spaghetti, you can't make heads or tails of it, dev code in production, empty try/catch blocks, empty statements, if (true)... (incl. their core classes)
Keep in mind this is a multi milion dollar company...
Someone please understand my pain...6 -
Okay so this is my first desk job. I'm experiencing some personal issues and wondering if they are normal, what you do to combat them, etc.
First of all, some days, I literally almost fall asleep on the job. Caffeine doesn't work much. I know it's just my sleep schedule but what should I do in this situation? What if I actually do fall asleep?
Secondly, I'm finding that my productivity only exists in bursts. I'll do three hours of work in 10 minutes, and then 10 minutes of work in three hours. I can't just catch a stride. How do I become more consistently productive? Should I be more consistent?
My legs hurt. Sitting all day is not for me. I guess this is more situation to situation, and I do walk almost 6k steps a day on my breaks, but it really doesn't feel great most of the day.9 -
Day 2 of devWholesome...
Have another great day! Have fun and do something productive! It is always a great feeling when you finish something that requires a lot of time and effort. Finish that project that you started but never finished, clean your room, or maybe just catch up on school work! Make sure you are also taking care of yourself with your hygiene and to eat all your meals and drink plenty of water. If you are feeling stressed today, take a break and relax! And again, make the most out of your day!4 -
!dev
I just had one guy coming back to the house at 4am, again, and he made his usual grand entrance, slamming the doors, stomping on the wooden floor making all the creaking sound as he walk all the way to his room, which is right beside mine. And when he went into the bathroom, which is on the other side of my room, he slammed he motherfucking lid on the toilet bowl which was so fucking loud I literally jumped out of bed. I ended up not being able to sleep (I have a lot of trouble falling asleep), and when I tried to sleep in the afternoon to catch up on the missed winks, another motherfucking bastard started blasting fucking hardcore electronics in the living room which is right below my room. The same bastard also plays loud movies or music at 2-3am. I’ve told that bastard that comes home late to watch his noise but man he only minds the noises I told him and nothing else. As for the other fucker, he’ll say he’d keep it down but continues doing what he’s doing anyway.
I moved here cause I know that it’s usually a quiet place and away from the party kids, but I somehow ended up with a party kid and an insensitive fucker (This motherfucker had the loudest sigh of frustration when I knocked politely on his door last night. Yes I calmed down before I talked to him, but ended up deciding to not utter a word at all when I hear that sigh).
I should move out, but I can’t find a place before next term cause it’s way too late at this point. I am on a lease, but my landlord understands my situation, and he seems okay with breaking the contract.
Having been here as an international student for almost 2 years now, and having moved 5 times, this has been the worst nightmare of a bunch of people to stay with.
For those that has read of me ranting about this elsewhere, yes it’s that same fucking bunch that doesn’t clean the house.9 -
I hate my coworker. I'm currently working in IT, but both my former full-time programming and my IT work has taught me how to dig for things and find them. He has learned this, and is CONSTANTLY bringing me things that have NOTHING to do with my job because he's too fricking LAZY to do it himself.
"Hey, there's a credit memo on this Amazon statement. I'd like to know what it was for, thanks."
SO LOG ONTO AMAZON AND LOOK FOR IT WITH YOUR OWN TWO EYEBALLS. I've got my own work to do without doing your AP detective work for you. THAT'S PART OF YOUR JOB.
But unfortunately I REALLY hate conflict and so I just do it for him, seething the whole time and knowing I've just reinforced the behavior.
EDIT: Before anyone says it, no it is not because he's stuck. If someone is at the end of their rope I'm glad to help them. But I've taken to asking him "so what have you tried?" And every single time he says "nothing." It's gotten to the point he'll literally say, "Hey can you do this for me? I haven't looked at it at all or tried anything." But he just doesn't catch on.5 -
When I was 6yo I was playing next to my dad with his old PC on a good old CRT a game called “Sperms” where you catch sperm with condoms and every time you do it made a really loud “YIPPIE” sound. I was playing this game for 4 years.
Somewhere around when I was 10 my dad told me we should build a PC and I was asking “Why does everyone has to make their own PC?”, I didn’t yet know what an cheap ass my dad is, so we did. Had a lot of fun and was very scared of the PSU, like really scared.
It blew up a few months later because I switched the toggle on the back from 220v to 110v, and got even more scared of PSU’s until I started an electricians apprentice.
Anyways, one day my dad and I where at a friends place and I played Tux Racer on his super loud Maschine that would crash if you kept the side door of the table closed, it ran some kind of Linux and I was fascinated how “simple and clean” it looks. I got a mini-cd to install it at home and immediately was hooked because the windows installation was such a pain in the arse those years. I did that all by myself just because I also wanted to play Tux Racer at home.
Anyways, somewhere right before GTA IV came out I started with VB.Net and ever since I was totally hooked and spend more time doing that than actually going to school.
My dad didn’t care and just let me do this, my mum just made sure I would have been up at least after the first lession, I don’t miss the bus and that I went to bed in a timely manner, which never happened because the PC was in my room and my mum slept downstairs and couldn’t notice that I was doing script kiddie things after an hour or so of “sleeping”.
So yeah, they didn’t care and were happy I didn’t annoy them.
Actually I didn’t wanted to become a developer because I always wanted to have it be a hobby or something and I liked woodwork more, but then people more qualified than me were more stupid than this script kiddie that still just wanted to play Tux Racer. That’s it.2 -
Stack Overflow is a great resource for all sorts of programming hints and tips, information and...sadly, desinformation. But if you want to comment on something someone's said you need 50 reputation points. How to achieve that when you need rep points to do anything that could earn you rep points? It's a catch 22 for newcomers that are like totally excluded from any discussions at SO which is more sort of a read-only community to me. This is where devRant shines. Anyone can rant about anything and comment on anyone's rant. Some rants and comments are stupid, and some are great. In the end of the day, freedom of speech is a great thing.9
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I have a confession to make. I am indeed a team of entities. Yes! The only catch is all those entities live inside one brain.
My first and perhaps most important insight stemmed from not being able to overcome a persistent identity crisis. I spent seven years trying to figure out who I am and what my worldview is. I realized however that it was impossible. It makes no sense to be rational while your irrational part is hovering over, judging.
So, I split my “me” into two parts: rational and emotional. Usually, they coexist peacefully.
When presented with a complicated case, I let both speak. It doesn't matter if they contradict each other. The consensus is never reached, but at least both parts spoke their mind and are now calm.
There are two kikis. Rational kiki talks about life, insights, worldview, and occasionally tech. Emotional kiki sends leg pics and describes her wild dreams.
Also, it gets even more complex when derealization hits. Remember, autistic brains don't have garbage collectors, so as the day goes by, noise accumulates, influencing my entire being. In the morning, I'm cold and calculated, albeit a bit robotic. In the evening, I'm creative and talkative, albeit a bit unhinged.
You're welcome!7 -
I love a number of the little slack "all clean" icons when you catch up on threads. They're adorable. My personal favorite is the floptopus.
Anyone else have fave examples of adorable, ideally platform mascot-related pieces of task-accomplishment-reward-bait (octocat, go gopher, etc etc?
It's a rant bc fuck anyone who's too cool for cute shit :p7 -
Hi guys!
I never thought that this day will come, be here is my first rant with a big dose of frustration.
So, I'm working on the API team of one of ower products and a coworker that works on the webapp has a lot of problems (don't want to be mean, but he has problems like 'i can't catch a 404 http status, please send a 200 with a message' ) and he always go and wines about the API and that he can't do his job because the API is faulty...
But it is not the case, every functionality of the API is well tested and it works as it should.
So, tonight I was the only one left from my team and the project manager comes and
starts asking me about why I am returning http status codes with all my responses, how the login works and other stuff like that...
Just wasted more than an hour to prove that all the code that I wrote works as expected...1 -
Regain work life balance.
The last few years especially with COVID I've started to do way to much for the company's I've worked for. Working while I was coughing my lungs out when I had COVID. Working during my holiday because it was finally a fun feature to develop. Working in lunch breaks because people would call me all the time (remote there are no boundaries)
I left that company on a good note, started actually healthy as the new company actually understands flex working. However as I gained responsibly more meetings started to appear also causing rushed lunches no more walks of sport activities. Than I was lead in a project and because of some personal circumstances (death in the family) that was running long. Again started to work overtime trying to catch up.
I need to stop doing this. Caring is fine but I just give to much when I feel responsible. Good thing is that my current company actually wants to help me with this.1 -
More rants coming up.
1st
Working with a guy who I am not sure has the necessary experience to begin with.
The person who hired him told me to teach the guy for him to catch up to our project and its pace. He has some experience with Java. Which our project is being developed in java in a linux dev environment in a full stack way. So we handle front to infrastructure.
First day working with him and I saw this guy is trouble.
1st - doesn’t know effing git commands. Who doesn’t know git nowadays. Ok i can forgive him for that. But damn this guy’s learning curve is so slow. After s month of joining, he still has to look up the commands in his photo cheatsheet.
2nd - doesn’t know linux basic cli commands like cd, ls, rm. not an ounce of knowledge. He told me he is used to developing in Windows. Now this. I can’t forgive him for not knowing this shit. cd (change dir) even exists in windows command line. He even has guts to say to everyone he wants to try working in our servers. The HORROR!
3rd - not sure if knowing junit and matchers of hamcrest, if you are working with Java is a must. But this guy doesn’t understand Matchers of Junit. How the fuck did he ensure effing quality in his prev work.
All in all, seems like this guy doesn’t understand the basics of current development tools.9 -
I have a domain with mailgun and a catch all statment, I don't remember signing up for this but I was apparently mad2
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?rant
We bought an expensive middleware which helped development speed and stability a lot. Something did not work and after a week I located the bug in the middleware. Support was adequate and the bug got fixed after my report.
I'm not mad at the developers, because bugs happen, and this one was hard to catch, even with tests.
On the other hand I have to explain my boss what took so much time.
It really wasn't my fault, but I also don't want to shame the middleware company, because it will make it harder for me to buy their stuff (and I quite like their products) or even any software at all. -
I have a co-worker who won’t stop “refactoring” our codebase. He will go on a long tangent — under the guise of working on a proper story — and then reveal proudly after a few days that he now introduced a new middle-layer into the code which will help us such and such.
I have never seen any benefit from this. I think sometimes cleaning up variable names is nice, but a lot of the things just add noise and complexity. He’s a junior dev, I’m a senior dev. My progressional opinion is that he is doing a bad job. Management doesn’t know the full extent and the lead programmer scolds him every now and then but in the end let’s the code changes pass code review. “It has already been implemented so what’s the harm”.
Then the rest of us are stuck with horrible merge conflicts. I recently noticed that some new business-important unit tests that I wrote were mysteriously gone. Oops — lost in some misguided refactoring I guess. I’m assuming they were failing after the refactor, so clearly they had to go... Fortunately the underlying logic still works I think.
His main tactic in all of this seems to be to just use argumentative stamina. He will lose discussion after discussion but doesn’t seem to care. He’ll just talk and talk. And the in the end the lead tech gives in. And/or doesn’t have the energy to catch the error introduced.
I swear, the company would be better off without him. Maybe even better if we keep paying him but he just cleans the toilets instead. Sometimes I almost believes he gets up in the morning to come to work and just fuck with people all day.2 -
So I got in contact with a recruiter who said they have a possible job for me. The catch is it's in c# (I am a python java dev) and that there is a assessment test for the language to test for competency. I told the recruiter that's fine but I would need a week to highlight the main differences between the two languages and at least do a couple of educational programs for my learning sake. All was fine and that was the plan.
The next day the recruiter notifies me that the test is being called off on account of the company being swarmed. So the recruiter then proposes another similar test (in c#) the recruiter will use to measure my skills and that the recruiter will send the test via email that same day. Later that day I check my email and don't see the test. So I message the recruiter and never get a response. Next day comes and I decide to give the recruiter a call; no response. I then wait until the next day and message him on linkedin that I still needed the test. Linkedin was showing he read the message, but of course didn't respond.
I told my brother about this and he said to send a message saying: "Hi [recruiters name] because of the lack of further feedback I decided to go with another opportunity. Best regards, Lane"
After I send it I get a message the next day from the recruiter saying: "Hey, sorry I haven't gotten back to you. We had to install a new phone system yesterday so it was a busy day."
"I'm going to send it to you today so that you can look at it over the weekend. "
I can't help but think the recruiter is full of shit, but I may be jumping to conclusion. I know they can have a busy schedule, but if you have time to look at a message on linkedin how long would it take to type a short message explaining what's going on? I would like to know any opinions or insights on this.10 -
Many "purists" love to piss on JavaScript and web development. And to an extent I can understand ostream’s frustration with these people.
It’s easy to criticize because yes: many web projects are indeed shit.
But I’d like to argue that the reason why so many of these projects are crappy is because of bad management:
- unrealistic deadlines
- no clear testing strategy
- or no testing at all because of deadlines
- no time allotted to catch up on technical debt
- etc.
This type of management is far more commonplace in web projects because things need to get delivered quickly and if they’re delivered with bugs, it’s no big deal as lives aren’t at stake.
I doubt this type of management is tolerated in projects where you’re working on software for welding machines (for example), where the stakes are that "you’re expected not to kill anyone" (to quote demolishun)
So in these types of projects, management can’t tolerate anything much below perfection and thus has to adapt by setting realistic deadlines that take into account the need for quality processes and thorough testing.
If this type of management was more common in web development, I can guarantee that web applications would be much more reliable and of better quality.
I can also guarantee that poorly managed non-web projects as outlined above would be just shitty as many web products.
My point being that’s it’s really DUMB to criticize fellow devs that work with web technologies on the basis that the state of websites/web apps is a mess. It just so happens that JS is the language of the web and that the web is where things are expected to be delivered quickly (and dirty … but we can fix it later mentality)
Stop acting like you’re the elite. I have no doubt you’re super smart and great at what you do. So be smart all the way and stop criticizing us poor webdevs that have to live with the sad state of affairs. ❤️38 -
Started work at 05:00 to catch a flight, just finished work now (20:00)
Tomorrow morning i have to be up at 03:30 to catch a flight back, my boss has also booked me in with a all day meeting with our largest client tomorrow so won't be leaving the office until 18:00.
Atleast im going to the midnight viewing of Capt. America tomorrow (if I'm awake)3 -
I'm fixing our wrapper for API calls. The typescript for it was nice and simple, except that halfway through it casted almost everything as `any` and then hand-typed the expected return type :)))
Took me almost two weeks to work through that wretched piece of code, I managed to get the types actually correct... but now it started to catch incorrect calls, so I have to go through quite a lot of files to fix the references. But the worst part?
Now it breaks unit tests.
Turns out, multiple frontend unit tests DID NOT MOCK API CALLS AT FUCKJNG ALL HGGHGGHHHHHH. I WONDER WHY THE TESTS WERE TAKING SO FUCKING LONG TO RUN. I AM FUCKING FROTHING AT MOUTH AND I MIGHT NEED TO BE PUT DOWN OR I WILL START BITING PEOPLE3 -
I need some opinions on Rx and MVVM. Its being done in iOS, but I think its fairly general programming question.
The small team I joined is using Rx (I've never used it before) and I'm trying to learn and catch up to them. Looking at the code, I think there are thousands of lines of over-engineered code that could be done so much simpler. From a non Rx point of view, I think we are following some bad practises, from an Rx point of view the guys are saying this is what Rx needs to be. I'm trying to discuss this with them, but they are shooting me down saying I just don't know enough about Rx. Maybe thats true, maybe I just don't get it, but they aren't exactly explaining it, just telling me i'm wrong and they are right. I need another set of eyes on this to see if it is just me.
One of the main points is that there are many places where network errors shouldn't complete the observable (i.e. can't call onError), I understand this concept. I read a response from the RxSwift maintainers that said the way to handle this was to wrap your response type in a class with a generic type (e.g. Result<T>) that contained a property to denote a success or error and maybe an error message. This way errors (such as incorrect password) won't cause it to complete, everything goes through onNext and users can retry / go again, makes sense.
The guys are saying that this breaks Rx principals and MVVM. Instead we need separate observables for every type of response. So we have viewModels that contain:
- isSuccessObservable
- isErrorObservable
- isLoadingObservable
- isRefreshingObservable
- etc. (some have close to 10 different observables)
To me this is overkill to have so many streams all frequently only ever delivering 1 or none messages. I would have aimed for 1 observable, that returns an object holding properties for each of these things, and sending several messages. Is that not what streams are suppose to do? Then the local code can use filters as part of the subscriptions. The major benefit of having 1 is that it becomes easier to make it generic and abstract away, which brings us to point 2.
Currently, due to each viewModel having different numbers of observables and methods of different names (but effectively doing the same thing) the guys create a new custom protocol (equivalent of a java interface) for each viewModel with its N observables. The viewModel creates local variables of PublishSubject, BehavorSubject, Driver etc. Then it implements the procotol / interface and casts all the local's back as observables. e.g.
protocol CarViewModelType {
isSuccessObservable: Observable<Car>
isErrorObservable: Observable<String>
isLoadingObservable: Observable<Void>
}
class CarViewModel {
isSuccessSubject: PublishSubject<Car>
isErrorSubject: PublishSubject<String>
isLoadingSubject: PublishSubject<Void>
// other stuff
}
extension CarViewModel: CarViewModelType {
isSuccessObservable {
return isSuccessSubject.asObservable()
}
isErrorObservable {
return isSuccessSubject.asObservable()
}
isLoadingObservable {
return isSuccessSubject.asObservable()
}
}
This has to be created by hand, for every viewModel, of which there is one for every screen and there is 40+ screens. This same structure is copy / pasted into every viewModel. As mentioned above I would like to make this all generic. Have a generic protocol for all viewModels to define 1 Observable, 1 local variable of generic type and handle the cast back automatically. The method to trigger all the business logic could also have its name standardised ("load", "fetch", "processData" etc.). Maybe we could also figure out a few other bits too. This would remove a lot of code, as well as making the code more readable (less messy), and make unit testing much easier. While it could never do everything automatically we could test the basic responses of each viewModel and have at least some testing done by default and not have everything be very boilerplate-y and copy / paste nature.
The guys think that subscribing to isSuccess and / or isError is perfect Rx + MVVM. But for some reason subscribing to status.filter(success) or status.filter(!success) is a sin of unimaginable proportions. Also the idea of multiple buttons and events all "reacting" to the same method named e.g. "load", is bad Rx (why if they all need to do the same thing?)
My thoughts on this are:
- To me its indentical in meaning and architecture, one way is just significantly less code.
- Lets say I agree its not textbook, is it not worth bending the rules to reduce code.
- We are already breaking the rules of MVVM to introduce coordinators (which I hate, as they are adding even more unnecessary code), so why is breaking it to reduce code such a no no.
Any thoughts on the above? Am I way off the mark or is this classic Rx?16 -
Got one right now, no idea if it’s the “most” unrealistic, because I’ve been doing this for a while now.
Until recently, I was rewriting a very old, very brittle legacy codebase - we’re talking garbage code from two generations of complete dumbfucks, and hands down the most awful codebase I’ve ever seen. The code itself is quite difficult to describe without seeing it for yourself, but it was written over a period of about a decade by a certifiably insane person, and then maintained and arguably made much worse by a try-hard moron whose only success was making things exponentially harder for his successor to comprehend and maintain. No documentation whatsoever either. One small example of just how fucking stupid these guys were - every function is wrapped in a try catch with an empty catch, variables are declared and redeclared ten times, but never used. Hard coded credentials, hard coded widths and sizes, weird shit like the entire application 500ing if you move a button to another part of the page, or change its width by a pixel, unsanitized inputs, you name it, if it’s a textbook fuck up, it’s in there, and then some.
Because the code is so damn old as well (MySQL 8.0, C#4, and ASP.NET 3), and utterly eschews the vaguest tenets of structured, organized programming - I decided after a month of a disproportionate effort:success ratio, to just extract the SQL queries, sanitize them, and create a new back end and front end that would jointly get things where they need to be, and most importantly, make the application secure, stable, and maintainable. I’m the only developer, but one of the senior employees wrote most of the SQL queries, so I asked for his help in extracting them, to save time. He basically refused, and then told me to make my peace with God if I missed that deadline. Very helpful.
I was making really good time on it too, nearly complete after 60 days of working on it, along with supporting and maintaining the dumpster fire that is the legacy application. Suddenly my phone rings, and I’m told that management wants me to implement a payment processing feature on the site, and because I’ve been so effective at fixing problems thus far, they want to see it inside of a week. I am surprised, because I’ve been regularly communicating my progress and immediate focus to management, so I explain that I might be able to ship the feature by end of Q1, because rather than shoehorn the processor onto the decrepit piece of shit legacy app, it would be far better to just include it in the replacement. I add that PCI compliance is another matter that we must account for, and so there’s not a great chance of shipping this in a week. They tell me that I have a month to do it…and then the Marketing person asks to see my progress and ends up bitching about everything, despite the front end being a pixel perfect reproduction. Despite my making everything mobile responsive, iframe free, secure and encrypted, fast, and void of unpredictable behaviors. I tell her that this is what I was asked to do, and that there should have been no surprises at all, especially since I’ve been sending out weekly updates via email. I guess it needed more suck? But either way, fuck me and my two months of hard work. I mean really, no ego, I made a true enterprise grade app for them.
Short version, I stopped working on the rebuild, and I’m nearly done writing the payment processor as a microservice that I’ll just embed as an iframe, since the legacy build is full of those anyway, and I’m being asked to make bricks without straw. I’m probably glossing over a lot of finer points here too, just because it’s been such an epic of disappointment. The deadline is coming up, and I’m definitely going to make it, now that I have accordingly reduced the scope of work, but this whole thing has just totally pissed me off, and left a bad taste about the organization.9 -
There are a few email addresses on my domain that I keep on receiving spam on, because I shared them on forums or whatever and crawlers picked it up.
I run Postfix for a mail server in a catch-all configuration. For whatever reason in this setup blacklisting email addresses doesn't work, and given Postfix' complexity I gave up after a few days. Instead I wrote a little bash script called "unspam" to log into the mail server, grep all the emails in the mail directory for those particular email addresses, and move whatever comes up to the .Junk directory.
On SSD it seems reasonably fast, and ZFS caching sure helps a lot too (although limited to 1GB memory max). It could've been a lot slower than it currently is. But I'm not exactly proud of myself for doing that. But hey it works!1 -
Sooooo... I've felt a bit lost during my years as a student and maybe this is a nice place to finally talk about it.
I've had my first programming experiences in school (back then it was delphi, a Pascal variant), then decided after graduating I want to study computer science. I've stuck with it and will finish my masters degree in a few months. (Took me a year longer than the university plans but will likely have a very good grade)
Since i have little programming experience and never coded anything useful (mostly study projects or simple programming tasks) I've always been struggling with depressions, worries of being not good enough and never finding a job etc pp, but in the last few months it got worse since I NEED to apply for jobs now as i graduate next may. I'd really like to improve and found some "learn how to code" websites but the progress seems still slow and meaningless when I compare myself to all those guys out there:
- those comparing several hardware/software pieces casually since they know all the (dis)advantages and specs off by heart
- those who have fierce discussions about languages, libraries, runtimes etc
- those who solve the problems in coding websites with 3 lines and incredibly mathematicsl proofs for why this shortcut works (fastest)
- basically the guys who discuss so many things i've never even heard of
I just feel so lost, useless and like i missed years of learning things everybody else just obviously knows now. Is there any way to catch up? I thought about trying to join a local Chaos Computer Club but they sound like they wouldn't be fond of a noob like me.6 -
Halt and Catch Fire is having another great season. Lived those days and it is so true. CompuServe, Compaq, Commodore, 5 1/4", Tandy 1000, Byte Mag, Atari, The Well... The tech you see is really 1985ish. Attention to detail is appreciated by long time technologists.
H&CF is about building a tech business and much applies to today's startups. That two brilliant tech women are leading the charge adds to it. All the characters are great Cameron, Gordon, Donna, the devs at Mutiny and Joe channeling Jobs (in my opinion) is spot on.
Any H&CF fans have an opinion?4 -
The following paper combines recurrent neural nets for vision with methods from reinforcement learning research:
https://proceedings.neurips.cc/pape...
Apparently an agent learned to catch a ball 85% of the time, without being explicitly told to track the ball. The RL algorithm rewarded the agent *only* for successfully catching the ball. The system itself used this reward signal to set its *own* policy/goal, which was used to guide it toward the goal of tracking the ball itself--all on its own.
Behold, the very infancy of the paperclip maximizer problem.3 -
You had two additional weeks to improve your project.
You could research different marketing strategies to increase revenue. You could add some new features to attract more users and ensure your existing users are satisfied. Finally, you could optimize performance to make your UI quicker.
But you’ve chosen to write some unit tests. Now that two weeks are gone, you got no new features, no performance improvements and no new marketing strategies while your competitors got them all.
Tests caught obvious bugs that can even be caught by static typing, but you by definition couldn’t write tests that’ll catch unpredictable bugs, so they are still present.
After six months you realize you have to rewrite a major part of your project because your project (surprise-surprise) has to chase market needs to stay relevant. Your tests are thrown into trash along with your old code.
“Having trouble with code quality? Write a lot of tests. And I mean a *lot*. Test every file in isolation. Mock as many imports as possible.
When you're done, your code will still be bad, but now your tests will make sure it's impossible to improve anything in any meaningful way.”12 -
I really like the concept of a "hackerspace" but they are far away from my flat and after working all day I don't really wanna travel across the city for hours to try things for an hour or two because I need to catch the train on time to get at least a bit of sleep.
I'm thinking of a "digital hackerspace" where ppl can "meet" and write code or build something(?). Does something like this exist?
If it doesn't I'd really like to build that kind of thing because I'd say I'm not the only person thinking like that 😅5 -
So here's a random idea: DDoS defence swarm.
Install the daemon on your server, and every time your server gets DDoS'd, all members of the swarm will mobilise to defend you, but the catch is that your server will have to help other members of the swarm too.
The defensive technique in question can be one of many:
1. Automated IP blocking/reporting with a blacklist in distributed form.
2. Other swarm members counterattack and cooperatively DDoS the offending addresses.
3. Flood the ISP with automated emails to force them to pay attention to the problem.
...or a combination of all of the above.
The only issue I can see with this is abuse potential. A clever person can trick the swarm into DDoSing innocents.15 -
When I say I'm in "DevOps" what I really mean is that I'm a full-stack engineer, DBA, system administrator, security engineer, auditor, cloud custodian, cost optimization expert, and everything else that doesn't get its own dedicated staff member here. Pretty much the catch all between developers and customer.
-
!rant just a question. Sorry in advance for the long post.
I've been working in IT in Windows infrastructure and networking side of things for my entire career (5years) and recently was hired for a role working with AWS.
We use Macs and we use *nix distros for days. I've only ever dabbled for 'funsies' before with Linux because every previous job I held was a Windows house and f*** all else.
I'm just wondering if anyone here might have some insights as to a great way to learn the Linux environment and to learn it the right way. I'm not the best Windows admin ever and will never claim to be, but I have seen stuff that other people have done that makes me want to swing a brick at someone's head. And I feel that with all of the setup wizards and the "We'll just do it for you." approach that Windows has used since forever it allowed enough wiggle room for people that didn't know what they were doing to f*** sh*t up royally. I'm not familiar enough with Linux to know if this is also a common problem. I know that having literal full-access to every file in your OS can cause a n00b like myself to mess up royal, thus the question about learning Linux the right way.
I vaguely understand the organization of the folders and file structure within Linux, and I know some very basic commands.
sudo rm -rf /*
Just kidding
But All of my co-workers at my new job are like mighty oaks of knowledge while I'm a tiny sapling. And at times I've been intimidated by how little I know, but equally motivated to try and play catch-up.
In addition to all of this, I really want to start learning how to program. I've tried learning multiple times from places like codecademy.com, YouTube tutorials, and codeschool.com but I feel like I'm missing the lesson that explains why to use a certain operation instead of another. Example: if/else in lieu of a switch.
I'm also failing to get the concept of syntax in certain languages I've tried before. Java comes to mind real fast.
The first language I tried teaching myself was C++ from YouTube. I ended up having a fever dream that night about coding and woke up in a cold sweat. Literally, like brain overload or something. I was watching tutorials for like 9 hours straight.
Does anyone know of a training resource that will explain, in terms a 5 year old would understand, what the code is doing and why? I really want to learn but I'm starting to lose steam cause I'm just not getting it.
Thank you in advance for any tips guys and gals. I really appreciate it. Sorry for the ridiculously long questions.5 -
"Exception has been thrown by the target of an invocation"
This error message pisses me off. I know the SSIS Script component is capable of catching exceptions, you can wrap all your code in a try/catch (please don't) and get an exception. So would it be so hard that if the Script Component throws an exception that it tells me what it is instead of sending me on a goddamn scavenger hunt?
The whole bullshit system of errors is why I hate SSIS. Just tell me what went wrong.
I did what I wasn't supposed to do, wrapped it in a try catch and it gave me a stack trace and an error message and all sorts of actionable shit. But why the hell can't it just do that on its own?
There is literally nothing worse, except maybe Hitler, than a goddamn vague error message.4 -
So, apparently, in 2015 our webhost (ixwebhosting) was purchased by Site5... This week, they finally migrated us to Site5 servers without warning, taking my email down in the process...
Today, after following the instructions in their own KB article (that tells you to click an icon that doesn't exist,) and chatting with support for over an hour, I was told that the new system they migrated us to doesn't support catch-all email accounts... At all... It's simply not possible to receive an email that was sent to your domain, unless the email address exists in the system somewhere... Despite the fact that it's a standard cPanel feature, that the old and new systems both use cPanel, that every other webhost I have ever seen that uses cPanel has this feature available, AND the fact that this is an important feature for a lot of websites, because they pipe all of their emails to a script for processing... It's simply not possible... They won't be providing that feature anymore. Nor for that matter is it possible to be migrated back...
They migrated accounts to a system that has a basic email function intentionally disabled, without warning... And we can't afford to open an account with someone else ATM... So I can't get any email until we get migrated... FML9 -
So a co-worker of mine contacted me for help in her project. I was in no mood to help as I hadn't slept properly the previous day. But she begged me to help, so I obliged just so I could get her off my back and catch some rest after 2 hours, or at least that's what I thought it would be. But here I am, 10 hours later, having just finished helping her in her project, and now I have a really bad headache, just waiting to go to sleep, but my brain is betraying me.
It was a project that uses Tryton framework (based on Python), which I sometimes feel is fucking inconsistent. Things won't work as expected most of the time. Her boss (my ex-boss) is a piece of shit, and he wanted the work by the next day (i.e. today). And nobody else (not even the boss, who would have gotten this work done in less than half the time had he helped her even a little bit) was ready to help, because they all hate her for being a slow learner. All I had to do was get some data in a particular format in a text file using the framework. But the amount of tries it took just to get the data in the text files cost around 2 hours due to shitty internet speeds that caused tons of lag on Anydesk. Then we had to take breaks in between for reasons. But due to my agitated state of mind, I couldn't sleep in those breaks. Then I had to spend time tinkering around with ljust and rjust to get the right amount of padding for the data, which took hours due to shitty internet speeds that caused tons of lag on Anydesk. And then Tryton kept throwing errors in between which took some time to fix. But we finally completed half the task, and I am off to sleep.
As I write, my co-worker is still awake completing the work her boss gave her. It's around 1:46am IST. HER BOSS IS A PIECE OF SHIT.2 -
I'm still using .then().catch() instead of the async await.
So, first of all, Fuck you for calling it a STANDARD now. its nowhere near to be called standard. You wanna get some data from an API? Wanna call it using axios or fetch? What if the server is down? what if there's an error that you don't even know existed? Where do I get that kinda error in async await? try-catch? no thanks :| I'm good -_-8 -
Ok so was dating this girl who n has a 8 year old I was with her for 4 year her son calls me dad... Long fucked up shit story short. She cheated fucked me over all that cool I stayed for the kid... A few months later I catch her in my son's bed with another dude.. ya I know right my apartment my everything!!!! How could she right.... but as most men knows Once Upon and gets caught doing something they turn into something completely unrecognizable in ridiculous. If I do whatever she says and wants to still let me in her son's life!! And as soon as I left my apartment to her she moved some dude in with his two kids and stole everything that I had.. so I had to get coppers involved to try to get some stuff... I mean I was free balling to work with no socks .. no towels nothing... you can only imagine how badly I wanted to go into my apartment and destroy this dude.... But for my son's sake I bit my lip and took it... she got a hold of my spare car keys both spare key tab and keys... shortly after I left they run my truck of all my HVAC technician tools... Then to make it worse some months later she emptied out my truck again... and you can only imagine how upset I was about everything because I love that kid and I don't want him to have to go through anything.... Someway somehow her and her new boyfriend got some guys off GitHub I mean I'm getting torn up out here ... GPS trackers .. people following me... and everytime I leave my truck or leave anything that gets broken into and stolen... it was so bad that they even made me lose my job at three different stores that I was working not because of my performance but every time I would walk outside of work my truck wouldn't start or it would be completely ransacked. Someone plz HELPPPPP and yes that's like the 4th GPS tracker that I've taken out of my second vehicle now because of this crap it is literally almost ruined my life6
-
Its only 5 months left till my graduation,and my mind is getting fucked up.
The current startup i am interning with is a lot stressful and demanding. I am giving my 1000%, only because this is the only place to.. how can i explain..
if world is a race of horses, then i am the tortoise and these guys are the only slow horses that i think i can catch up with. These people are your next door app dev startup, releasing multiple apps fastly and trying to hit the magic recipe. I am not sure if i am learning anything besides how to search stuff on my own and produce faster results. But still, better than nothing.
However i am a far sighted person and am not sure if this is the future that i want.
I am currently giving 14+ hours to this startup as an intern (including all the traveling from home). The only relaxation i could make in future is to shift near the office which will save me 3-4 hours but then what?
I am currently running out of goals. My childhood was shit, but i want to make my youth meaningful.
Leaving my home means leaving the only 2 people (mom/dad) currently present actively in my life.
My college would be over by then, all my colleagues are all on their own ,going into different companies. We don't meet now leave alone meeting then. I am also not much into( or have the time to be into) online games and anime where those guys meet/chat
Not that i was able to gather courage to get into some relationship or talk to people till now. I don't have much talks with my officemate or gals coz 1 :i am so full of work and (2) i simply can't
Currently i spent my whole Saturday sleeping and watching movies and Sunday doing the office work.
Is this going to be my whole working life now? I often think other people's jobs as less demanding but i don't think that would be the case.
I just want to be in touch with people, the people that i know, the people i can trust somewhat.
When i was in 7th std, life was so easy. There was this just 1 irritating thing called school that we had to attend.
After that, we used to run down to nearest park in our shorts and cricketbats or rsckets, play till our heart's content, then sit in some friends house for hours and talk shit , then come back home , do some irritating study, then go back to watching television and playing online games with those same friends , while deciding the birthday party of some guy and game plans for the next day.
Damn5 -
For Silicon Valley fans, all of us?, looks like they visited Google last week.
https://youtu.be/QOXup8chEoY
And now in additional to TED Talks, I need to catch up on Talks at Google...3 -
Oh my dear internet,
FUCK THIS FUCKING SHIT
I AM SICK AND TIRED OF IT, WHO BUILT THIS HACKED TOGETHER ORWELLIAN SWAMP PIT?
Fuck the same fucking Envato template on every content page with 70 layers of sidebars, inline ads, popups, cookies and content shifting as if I was playing CATCH UP WITH YOUR FUCKING CONTENT.
FUCK the same fucking annual upselling 'plans' on every 7-day trial overengineered scam app that requires me to sign up for 1 fucking, falsely advertised task where my fucking password generator doesn't even recognize the input as a password field so I have to cmd+, to my FUCKING BABYLONIAN PASSWORD ARCHIVES PROMPTING ME FOR THE MASTER PASSWORD.
Thank god I can at least CREATE A BURNER CREDIT CARD THAT FREEZES ITSELF BECAUSE I CANNOT BE BOTHERED TO UNSUBSCRIBE FROM YOUR FUCKING STEAMING CRAP.
FUCK every fucking step I take being recorded by our CYBERPUNK OVERLORDS REQUIRING ME to sign up for 5 different fucking privacy protection tools' annual plan or duct tape some open source shit onto my browser just for some BASIC PRIVACY WHILE TRYING TO NAVIGATE ALL THE OTHER 5000 annuals plan naval mines like A FUCKING FRENCH SUBMARINE IN 1940 GERMAN WATERS.
FUCK my walled garden scam ecosystem not being compatible with your walled garden scam ecosystem prompting me to reactivate my old SATANIC GOOGLE DON'T BE EVIL ACCOUNT from 2012 sending me on a DANTE ALIGHIERI STYLE ODYSSEY THROUGH THE 9 LAYERS OF PASSWORD RESET QUESTIONS, UNEXPECTED ERROR, 2FA MY PHONE DIED HELL to come out on the other side as a broken man.
Thank GOD I have your useless SUPPORT PAGE to aid with my signup problems that is actually just an FAQ with a hidden EASTER EGG HUNT for your support form CRISP AI BOT THAT IS ALSO 'currently experiencing high demand due to COVID' which is peculiar since that has been 3 years ago, but fortunately for you enabled you to fire ALL YOUR SUPPORT STAFF AND REPLACE IT WITH THIS BANNER.
I might as well just SCRAPE your fucking content, it'd be faster.
And although it is quite funny, FUCK THIS PAGE TOO for having me create another of 10.000 accounts to write this shit, where my browser firmly placed a newly created burner email into the PASSWORD FIELD.
I do not know how we managed to create something that is even more unwieldy than 56k DIAL-UPS, but I know that if this shit continues I'll have to train my own AGI to proudly interact with of all this STUPID SHIT on my behalf or I'll have to move into THE FUCKING MOUNTAINS AND LIVE WITH THE DEER.1 -
Playing pokemon. I'm extremely into the series and played nearly every gen since the first ones. Even bought the cheap 2ds just to play these 3ds versions even tho i got acutally no time during exams and sometimes even played the different editions of the same gen just because i can.😅
And I have the habit to think about "how is it done?" With everything that is displayed on a screen or just blinks. And with 800 pokemon and their stats and subforms and IVs and all that nerdshit (back then compressed in such a small rom and running on pretty low end devices) i began to think about data structures, organization of them and such, especially when there are many big, wide datasets.😪3 -
Aaaaaaggghhhhj fuck you mosquitoes ! Fucking fuckly fuck you all!!! i wish to have a fuckin hunk spider with 8 eyes and a diminishing machine right now... We 2 will get smaller enough to come below my bed to the nasty place you jerks are hiding then use the webs to catch everyone of you to give you a slow painful death by spider claws.
Bloody micro fuckers1 -
Backstory: my father used to work in software development and IT support in companies with medium to large sized networks. I decided to catch up with him a few weeks ago and he asked me thus almighty question
"So if I installed another router in our house, does that mean I can double the amount of traffic going from my computer to the fibre modem?"
All respect has been lost, I was ashamed.3 -
I took 9 days off. Two 3-days long-weekends included.
First long-weekend went in Holi celeberations.
Weekdays went in planning and executing trip to Vaishno Devi.
Second long-weekend went in resting because Vaishno Devi is a hiking pilgrimage of a total of 30+ kms and 650+ kms away from my house. Totally loved the trip, though. Always a pleasure.
After 9 days of leaves, I come back feeling somewhat mentally fresh and rested.
The very next day, I catch cold and fever. Whole body fucked up. Skull paining from sneezing and blowing nose too much. Body paining from weakness and little fever.
Now.. I don’t want to work at all. Even little work gives me stress. Even though I have time to complete it.
I mean 😪
What an unnecessary hell after 9 days of heaven.2 -
Me: "ok let's have a look at this code I have to review ..."
try
{
* Some random unreadable overcomplicated shit code *
}
catch (Exception e)
{
// Useful for debug
}
😓
In which God forsaken crazy alternative universe, a "catch all" block that swallows the exception and does nothing else is even slightly close to the concept of "useful for debug"3 -
I absolutely hate it when companies use this or that medium for communications despite me asking them time and time again for another.
I have a mail server for more professional communications. The phone, only for stuff that won't matter if I inevitably end up forgetting about it (even more so now that Google made call recording more or less impossible, laws be damned). I will forget about a phone call no doubt. I've got better shit to do than to remember your manglement decisions, thank you very much. On mail, that's all nicely on my mail server for retrieval in several years even.
So I ask them to use the email address I gave them, a dedicated one for their company too (catch-all go brrr). Can't do that with phone numbers. Managing all those SIM cards aside, our government has now limited the amount of SIM cards one can have to 10. And texts and phone calls are not a long-term medium! And I can't share my phone number with just about anyone because people will inevitably spam the shit out of it, AND it's hard to replace! It's not a good medium! So with all due respect, companies - I couldn't care less what medium you prefer to use for your customers. You don't care about what your customer wants you to use - explicitly so! - and you lose a customer. It's as simple as that. Dealing with manglement is one thing, but dealing with manglement using the wrong media is something I'd really rather not do.
But hey I guess that virtue signalling is more "in" than actually listening to your goddamn customers nowadays? Let's replace another master/slave reference. You know, arguing that if we did that 2 years ago, George Floyd would've totally survived. Not by fixing the US police brutality, oh no no no. That's not the right way. Changing nomenclature and hashtags however, and not giving half a shit about your customers, yeah that's the way to go!1 -
A couple of months ago I watched all 3 seasons of 'Halt and Catch Fire'. I thought it was excellent. If im honest I enjoyed it more than mr robot (and I loved that). Still not seen Silicon Valley though (it's gonna cost too much).7
-
Finally friday! Only a few hours left in it school and I can start programming again and catch up with all the sleep i'm missing by not getting up till 5pm...1
-
This to good to be true: a script that removes all win10 bloatware and "telemetry" processes at once.sat as .bat, execute and your pc runs smooth...could there a catch? Expert advise welcome ;) https://hwinfo.com/misc/...3
-
I take the day off for a dr appointment cause I know shots make me tired and I won't work well after
But..... my coworker breaks a super important batch script by not reading a pop up note on a recent fix and (temporary) manually needed adjustment that pauses the script until you press a button
Then proceeds to skip all THREE places across the process to catch the problem caused by that not reading the note
And finally sees an issue AFTER final version is already sent out to clients....
So as soon as I get home I need to log on and rerun the process taking my time to read the check spots to make sure values and counts are correct and a new file is sent out
It feels great to take a chunk of my day off to cover a mistake of someone else's
Also should note I'm salaried. So I don't get paid extra for logging on and fixing this on my day off. Kinda sucks but whatever3 -
It is great feeling, to leave company and leave all your crap code to others :D
500 lines bash generic wrapper to curl (just to catch and print errors, not just silently fail as most devs tell curl to do).
It was monster that used "function overload" and "subclasses" (based on dynamic source files). Also dynamically created inline AWK script to parse curl output. It kinda worked, but amount of high-level hacks I had to use was enormous.
Never use Bash when you do not have to. Even if you have experience with it. Others don't have it and will fail miserably trying to patch your code. Just leave bash for fast bridging between programs, leave python/java/c#/go or any other proper OOP language for a job. Please ? -
Had to extend the platform of a customer. For one part of my task (generating an encrypted string) there already was a class with encryption and decryption methods. This class is used in a gazillion places all over the code, so I thought it might be a good idea to re-use already existing stuff... Until I saw that the encryption method using basic Java methods (all fine with that) wrapped in a try-catch block, 'cause the Java methods may throw, returning err.getMessage() in the catch block...
Yeah...sure...makes sense... Instead of throwing an error or returning null just remove the possibility to handle the error.
So I decided to basically copy the methods and return null so I can work with that.
Created a merge request and was told by another dev of that company to remove my own impelemtation of the encryption method and use the already existing. Arguing that I won't have a possibility to prevent my code, that returns an URI containing the encrypted string, from generating something like "http://..../Encryption failed because of null" without success.
So I had to use the already existing crappy code...5 -
1/2 dev and a fair warning: do not go into the comments.
You're going anyway? Good.
I began trying to figure out how to use stable diffusion out of boredom. Couldn't do shit at first, but after messing around for a few days I'm starting to get the hang of it.
Writing long prompts gets tiresome, though. Think I can build myself a tool to help with this. Nothing fancy. A local database to hold trees of tokens, associate each tree to an ID, like say <class 'path'> or some such. Essentially, you use this to save a description of any size.
The rest is textual substitution, which is trivial in devil-speak. Off the top of my head:
my $RE=qr{\< (?<class> [^\s]+) \s+ ' (?<path>) [^'] '\>}x;
And then? match |> fetch(validate) |> replace, recurse. Say:
while ($in =~ $RE) {
my $tree=db->fetch $+{class},$+{path};
$in=~ s[$RE][$tree];
};
Is that it? As far the substitution goes, then yeah, more or less. We have to check that a tree's definition does not recurse for this to work though, but I would do that __before__ dumping the tree to disk, not after.
There is most likely an upper limit to how much abstraction can be achieved this way, one can only get so specific before the algorithm starts tripping balls I reckon, the point here is just reaching that limit sooner.
So pasting lists of tokens, in a nutshell. Not a novel idea. I'd just be making it easier for myself. I'd rather reference things by name, and I'd rather not define what a name means more than once. So if I've already detailed what a Nazgul is, for instance, then I'd like to reuse it. Copy, paste, good times.
Do promise to slay me in combat should you ever catch me using the term "prompt engineering" unironically, what a stupid fucking joke.
Anyway, the other half, so !dev and I repeat the warning, just out of courtesy. I don't think it needs to be here, as this is all fairly mild imagery, but just in case.
I felt disappointed that a cursed image would scare me when I've seen far worse shit. So I began experimenting, seeing if I could replicate the result. No luck yet, but I think we're getting somewhere.
Our mission is clearly the bronwning of pants, that much is clear. But how do we come to understand fear? I don't know. "Scaring" seems fairly subjective.
But I fear what I know to be real,
And I believe my own two eyes.11 -
try (HappyHolidays happyHolidays = new HappyHolidays()) {
happyHolidays.wish(all);
} catch (HolidayWishesNotWelcomedException){
specialCasePatternInterface.specialCaseCall();
}
Yep.18 -
You know how each generation is taught more and more advanced stuff? My grandparents didn't have a clue about the the things my parents were learning at school. My parents could only catch up with my school course until like 7-8 class. Considering this trend we should have no idea about half the things our kids will be learning in higher classes.
However, since AI is taking its pace, schools are adapting and starting to use it for teaching, workplaces are leveraging it to rely on employees' brainpower and skill less and less,... I wonder if we won't see a downtrend. I wonder if we won't be the smartest generation who managed to ingest so much knowledge, and all the generations to come will only focus on mastering prompt engineering.
I wonder, how long will we survive with this dumbed down society... As the primal instinct is to overcome your opponent with greater force, possibly destroying it and everything around. And less educated tend to rely on primal instincts more.
I wonder if I'll live long enough to see Idiocracy [the movie] manifest in real life.
I know I refer to Idiocracy movie more often than anyone refers any other movie here. But it just hits too close to home too often. It might look like a silly something to spend time staring at, but man.. It's got one hell of a point3 -
I have so many thoughts I literally cannot scream
I don't know where to go and find what I'm looking for
is this the world I remember? scrolled through some current events and this isn't the world I grew up in in the 90s
it's strange life goes on like that
and my teeth keep cracking and will probably fall out of my mouth
I've learned all of dentistry and that ain't it
and the AIs are told to be contradictory and when you catch them they cease communicating
and the search don't work
and forums don't exist
this isn't the world I remember
where you could find real people and real things
it's such a strange world
there's new fads,
people care about weird things... not like actors, but whole technology stacks,
everything is work is stressful, how to be a "leader" (wtf), look at this muffin I made, anti-aging foods or some nonsense, some dude survives on an island for 7 days
I remember when the Internet was like "how to install a printer!"
I've been looking around for stuff to buy, like I wanted a treadmill for a standing desk but they're all sus. I wanted a lamp but they're all sus. I wanted a Roomba but they're all sus. all the pictures are photoshopped on every site, the reviews look fake or outright are 90% "got product for free" and it even states so in the disclaimer, or just plain most things don't have a single rating
it's like the whole economy is dead
why did everyone decide to resell lamps, treadmills, and roombas, wtf
nobody wants this shit. I mean I wanted it but not from scammers. and you can't find not scammers.
there's no real news (like exciting shit), there's no real stuff, there's no real people
I guess life just goes on, we're just parasites on a rock hurdling through space
things I was sentimental about are gone now
I don't even know what people do. I guess everyone my age does meetups and retarded middle-age going to die in their house shit, and I'm stuck at 12 year old shit poster
and anyone interesting got gobbled up by a university and made unofficial nerd clubs and have personal phone calls or something to discuss cool things, but I hated the snobbiness and never fit in with those due to my punchiness, willingness to sound retarded and sometimes gender
it's strange to see articles for dating. I used to have such unified theories about everything, but things have changed so much it's not like slightly off but I just looked outside my window and I appear I'm on an alien planet now
something something mortality I guess. makes me wonder if just the random-ass direction societies take is all that matters. but then why would that even matter anyway? I've always been such a perfectionist, and been lauded for predicting the future everywhere, but somehow I feel blindsided
I don't get the point
I feel like some metamorphosis is happening
but I don't know what I'm giving birth to
I guess it's not the right way to do things but just the way you want to do things
people my age focus on the upbringing they had but I'm not fond of being defined by things I didn't choose, it just doesn't meet my perfectionistic standards you see
it's strange to want to go in a direction but being so out of touch you don't know how
I used to spend so many evenings reading everything and finding the weirdest things nobody knew about
but these things are so hard to find
or are they? maybe I'm mixing my unconscious stuckness to my own familiarity with feeling caged in
word of mouth used to exist but now it's a promo that gets you banned
reddit is a ghost town with the amount of people they banned
and people are so weird now. you enter a room you never get anything interesting
how many uninteresting places is there per interesting place?
if I don't know where to go to find what I'm looking for I need to go everywhere and survey everything so I can itemize and know how to navigate in the directions I'm looking for
maybe it's the crushing defeat in realizing muting tactics work
that barrier to do a task will drop the lazy, but eventually even the relentless can't find their way out because every step is so far
maybe I thought of the world as an infinite garden of infinite gifts, and it's like it's coming to an end. the party ends. but I don't like anything else7 -
PHP is awesome, but it annoys me that there is no typing and that you still can get errors based on types...
Other than that, not being able to catch all errors in one catch and especially not being able to natively catch fatal errors is my biggest problem...
(not natively meaning that you can use hackish solutions but there's no "fatal error" class to use in your try catch, and you're using the register shutdown function not as intended...)8 -
My most recent side project is meant to be a lighthearted thing with a dynamic subdomain where anyone can type [whatever-subdomain-they-want].is.obviously.best or [whatever-subdomain-they-want].are.obviously.best or [whatever-subdomain-they-want].is.not.obviously.best or [whatever-subdomain-they-want].are.not.obviously.best.
I have a list of political terms and people that route to an HTML page that says “[subdomain] has been flagged as political. The creator of this site intended this domain to be used to spread joy and merriment and feels that pushing political agendas undermines that intent.”
I have sentiment analysis in combination with a disallow list on is/are (positive, rather than is.not and are.not) routes that if the subdomain is flagged as negative by sentiment analysis or matches a term in the disallow list, it serves an HTML page that says “[subdomain] is/are NOT obviously best. What the hell is your problem?”
Sentiment analysis only goes so far and it’s hard for it to catch a lot of things (since it’s a small amount of input) and I’m not confident that I’ll think of all of the possible things that really shouldn’t resolve to is/are OBVIOUSLY best.
Is there anything you guys can think of that should be on the disallow list?
If it helps, the disallow list so far is https://raw.githubusercontent.com/A...16 -
An app I'm making for a client currently has 23 "pages" that are simply web views.
Most of those pages have A HREFS which open other pages (some external pages that I have no access to as a developer).
Of course, some of the links aren't HREFS and are javascript calls to change the content on the screen without going to another page. So the user thinks they have gone to another web page when then system doesn't recognise it as another page...
Additional to this, there are multiple versions of the pages depending on which language the user has selected in the app.
And nobody seems to have considered how the default back button handles all these possible eventualities (whether it can go back to previous web page, IF it was an HREF and not just JS mimicking a new page (and how would my webview even catch that), and of course IF the language hasn't changed during the user journey etc etc)
Am I wrong for being annoyed about this? Am I the dick for not developing a clean solution to it? Or am I justified because webviews have no place inside an app!
I'm sort of hoping apple deny this app due to too many web views :S8 -
That moment when: You're asked to quickly code a fake login screen and you have a deadline to add it to 10 devices before 2pm.
First build: Forgot to force it to be on top, forgot to add closing preventions
Second build: Due to it going on tablets, it needed an onscreen keyboard, but being on top all the time means the builtin onscreen keyboard doesn't work.
Third build: Forgot to add try and catch exceptions which caused crashes
Final build: Avast kept closing and opening it due to DeepScan
urgh... -
FFS! having nodejs server on heroku, added certificate successfully for https, yet when going to www.example.com it uses http on prod and maintanence page while example.com goes to https.
All my attempts to catch http connection failed.
This is the definition of me wanting to bang my keyboard and problem autosolves itself while I am doing it!
Where is the my one click and everything is ready. I want to code back end and front end not spend 2 days trying to figure out https bullshit for unknown reason. -
I'm developing an app for a not so mobilefriendly website.
I do not coorporate with the webmaster, yet, so I need to sort of reverse engineer my way around everything (basically just one feature.. xD).
It's a website for people who likes to fish, and they *have* to submit their catches. So, when people submit their catches via the form and click "Submit", the URL they are sent to goes like
http://url.tld/submit_catch.asp/...
I can't figure out if that is a POST request, or what it is.
Somehow, I need to submit a catch from the Android App, and all I currently got is that URL.
What do I need to look into to solve my issue here? Any help appreciated :)22 -
Let me run something by all of you. Let's say you once started freelancing as a "Plan B" in case your full-time gig dropped you. Over 12 years you've managed to build a long-standing personal brand around that occasional freelancing. You have several clients who adore you and the work you do and they tell you they would be lost without your talent and have nowhere else to go and nobody else they trust. You know, because in the past you tried to send them elsewhere (for various reasons) and they just kept coming back.
You get laid off from the full-time gig and ACME Company calls and interviews you as a top candidate they're really interested in for that same type of work for a full-time job they're offering.
Here's the catch...if hired, you have two months to basically erase your personal brand and agree never to do any freelancing work as before, even on your own time on evenings and weekends. ACME wants your full focus and attention. Additionally, you find out that the person you'd be replacing is being let go because they weren't sufficiently tech-skilled for the job. And, with a little digging, you find out that person _also_ had several freelancing gigs going on the side. Probably for the same "Plan B" reason. Which is probably why ACME is demanding exclusivity.
Your client base is small. ACME says "we don't care". The work you do is 90% automated and easily achievable in just minutes a day on a weekend or evening. ACME says "doesn't matter". You already had full-time work to begin with so you weren't doing a ton on the side. ACME couldn't be less interested in this "excuse". And you're not keen on the idea of burning down your brand, especially with no guarantees of any kind in the present IT industry hiring/firing/layoffs climate. ACME says this issue is make or break for them.
If you get to the offer stage do you:
a) Flip the bird to your brand and clients you've built up for over a decade and memory-hole it?
b) Negotiate a non-compete clause with ACME, agreeing not to take on any new clients while working full time for them?
c) Flip the bird to ACME and look for something else?
Asking for a friend. ;)16 -
After three months of development, my first contribution to the client is going live on their servers in less than 12 hours. And let me say, I shall never again be doing that much programming in one go, because the last week and a half has been a nightmare... Where to begin...
So last Monday, my code passed to our testing servers, for QA to review and give its seal of approval. But the server was acting up and wouldn't let us do much, giving us tons of timeouts and other errors, so we reported it to the sysadmin and had to put off the testing.
Now that's all fine and dandy, but last Wednesday we had to prepare the release for 4 days of regression testing on our staging servers, which meant that by Wednesday night the code had to be greenlight by QA. Tuesday the sysadmin was unable to check the problem on our testing servers, so we had to wait to Wednesday.
Wednesday comes along, I'm patching a couple things I saw, and around lunch time we deploy to the testing servers. I launch our fancy new Postman tests which pass in local, and I get a bunch of errors. Partially my codes fault, partially the testing env manipulating server responses and systems failing.
Fifteen minutes before I leave work on the day we have to leave everything ready to pass to staging, I find another bug, which is not really something I can ignore. My typing skills go to work as I'm hammering line after line of code out, trying to get it finished so we can deploy and test when I get home. Done just in time to catch the bus home...
So I get home. Run the tests. Still a couple failures due to the bug I tried to resolve. We ask for an extension till the following morning, thus delaying our deployment to staging. Eight hours later, at 1AM, after working a full 8 hours before, I push my code and leave it ready for deployment the following morning. Finally, everything works and we can get our code up to staging. Tests had to be modified to accommodate the shitty testing environment, but I'm happy that we're finally done there.
Staging server shits itself for half a day, so we end up doing regression tests a full day late, without a change in date for our upload to production (yay...).
We get to staging, I run my tests, all green, all working, so happy. I keep on working on other stuff, and the day that we were slated to upload to production, my coworkers find that throughout the development (which included a huge migration), code was removed which should not have. Team panics. Everyone is reviewing my commits (over a hundred commits) trying to see what we're missing that is required (especially legal requirements). Upload to production is delayed one day because of this. Ended up being one class missing, and a couple lines of code, which is my bad (but seriously, not bad considering I'm a Junior who was handed this project as his first task at his first job).
I swear to God, from here on out, one feature per branch and merge request. Never again shall I let this happen. I don't even know why it was allowed to happen, it breaks our branch policies. But ohel... I will now personally oppose crap like this too...
Now if you'll excuse me... I'm going to be highly unproductive and rest, because I might start balding otherwise after these weeks... -
I decided to take this week to write unit tests for some code I already finished. I am new at it and I really want to incorporate as part of work. (Damn deadlines).
I am already seeing the good effects. Bugs I didn't catch before are now showing up.
Now I am wondering what I have been doing all these days calling myself a developer... -
@dfox @trogus
Is there a way to hide ++ and notifs from the UI itself
I am thinking about the current UI, seems like it is designed to “catch-up”.
A more refreshing design would be where i get to hide all the ++ and notifs from the UI itself.
That way App engagement is solely based on my realistic interest rather than an need for external validation8 -
It's funny how alcohol actually makes you remember all the crazy shit you had to deal with.
As when I was a junior c# programmer at an ERP shop.
I was new, naive and full of energy.
I used to dive deep into the code base, and one of the things I noticed but didn't pay too much attention was.
Error stacks were usually meaningless.
And why was that?
First, well it was c#.
Second, the guys use to do this.
try {
ThrowingFunction();
} catch (Exception e ) {
throw e;
}
PS: I'm not doing c# anymore, that was 10 years ago. So syntax might be a bit off.8 -
Im beginning to think im stuck in an infinite loop of learning. This fucking bullshit never stops. I just continuously keep learning new shit and the more shit i learn the more i realize how much bullshit i still have to learn
It creates an illusion as if i know nothing
Just when i thought i see the end of the horizon and reach it only then i realize it just keeps on going into oblivion, as a sphere
Its like im trying to catch and find a corner of a sphere
There aint none
Its pointless
Is it also pointless to keep learning like this?
Perhaps this whole existence is pointless
Real talk now whats the point of existence bro
No matter what you do or dont do it doesnt matter
No matter if you're successful or not it doesnt matter
No matter if you learn all the bullshit in the world you're still gonna die and it wont matter
No matter how much i learn, it still and will always appear as if its not enough to these shitface recruiters and companies, to them it doesnt matter
Nothing matters. Everything is empty and meaningless. The entire life itself is. I dont value life. I dont care if i live or die. I feel no joy when i succeed and i feel no sadness when i fail
The tiny little bit of joy or success cannot outweight the years of sadness depression emptiness and failure the life has dumped onto me in spite of my hard work and continuous learning
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh20 -
So i bribed a fellow dev/friend who HATES php and Magento... to help me grind out a Magento site while im super behind on a bunch of crap that's mostly boring administrative bs (#ReluctantlyInCharge)
He knew I was coding in python several times over the past several months... yet, despite my near constant griping of formatting bs and high preference of basically anything that doesnt require readability-esq formatting... he apparently didnt get it.
I need to make a quick splash page with a timer on it (other cool elements that i dont think ive ever seen done but i figured why not... weird shit is totally on brand here... like scripting page elements to change and see if people catch on... in very basic ways)...
I know js plenty... but I'd likely have looked up the syntax, was lazy, he loves js (for the intended purpose... he does a lot of blockchain dev) so i asked if hed write me a quick timer line cuz... well im lazy.
He totally overcomplicated it and sends me a page he typed up incl html header. Timer was 3 short block/lines with semicolons... i laughed and wondered why he did all that instead of just the little js... he didnt know either. I told him as a courtesy id make sure to keep the js formatting as he wrote it instead of 1 line...
He sends me 2 examples of a js timer in 1 line... like 1semicolon... i had to show him what i actually meant... 3 'lines' with semicolons on 1 visual line...
He was stunned, then realised i must really hate python11 -
DREAM 1
(my comments look like this)
A kikiland metro system. It's extradimensional and shapeshifting. When you enter it, it adapts to your needs. The people inside (they're probably just vinyl shells), the social circumstances, all generated for you.
When you enter it, it knows where you want to go. It spawns exactly one train just for you. It will be the first, it will be the last. You have to catch it to go where you need. If you miss it, there will be no more trains, and you have to wait till the metro station closes for the night and reopens.
It's always you entering, catching the train that arrives just in time, going to where you need to go and exiting.
Because of its extradimensional nature, you cannot agree to meet someone there — every person has their own personal metro generated just for them every time, with exactly one train going exactly to the station you need.
It's used by BLA as a form of control. When they don't want you to go somewhere, the train won't spawn. Or, it might diverge and get you to some other place. It isn't known whether the map can be altered on the fly or not. So far, the consensus is that the map is persistent and is a public knowledge, and it's just the metro itself that is extradimensional. But, no one ever saw the real metro in its real form, and not the top layer that protrudes into the three-dimensional world you can interact with. It might be the case that they can make people disappear by creating ad-hoc stations that don't intersect with the real world, trapping them in places that are nowhere in particular.
(it took seeing BLA once in one dream to make all the following dreams include them. Sigh.)
Kikiland also has a school, and it always had it. I befriended a chemistry teacher there. His classroom is small — exactly as deep as other classrooms, but really narrow. There are no desks there, just his desk and some bookshelves. Chemistry isn't a priority there — his class exists only because it should. No one attends it. This is why he was so pleased to meet me. Despite his classroom being located on a busy floor, its door is overlooked by students, and NO ONE ever enters it. He just sits there, waiting for students to arrive, but they never do.
He has a secret, though, because of course he does. In the game Control, if you complete the main storyline before you complete some side quests, one of the main characters will be sitting in the C-suit hall, doing her things, waiting for you to come and talk to her. But at the same time, she will be waiting for you deep down the oldest house's mines, again, just sitting there, waiting for you to take the quest. This teacher is the same.
If you have a good relationship with him, and you attend his class, the classroom will change to a tunnel entrance, with him being the security guard. He's your friend, he'll let you in. It looks like Fallout's vault entrance. THIS is how you enter the REAL kikiland metro. (Dream 1 ends here.)
Episode 2
Tiny waterborne rat puppies whose mouth is their entire face unfolding like a piece of paper with teeth covering it as a grid. (I wrote about them already, but here they are again.) They are _tiny_, a bit like tadpoles. Also, like tadpoles, they die if you touch them out of water. As I was flying over some mountain resort (I routinely fly in my dreams, but it feels more like a very low gravity falling I can control, like using a parachute in GTA San Andreas), I dumped them to a location that resembled the garden level of Prince of Persia: Warrior Within for my cat to eat. It didn't want to. -
You know all those times when you neglected to put anything in those catch blocks?
If this hasn't happened yet, just wait. Soon enough some lunatic's nondeterministic code will randomly break you will have to spend hours figuring out why because you never did anything with that error.
Of course, actually writing code for every mandatory catch block is even more of a waste of time, so empty catch blocks it is!1 -
My school did that and it helped firing the worse teachers I got :
A simple poll on every course taught during the three year.
[Gonna be surely a long rant since some testimony below]
The previous prom before us got a teacher that went nuts, like the first and only lesson classes was like "Okay so if you don't understand my lessons, you get out. I don't want any question." I'm not kidding.
So since he wanted to teach researching stuff, they had only 4 hours of lessons, and the other classes were to research.
At the exam, he went nuts again and were saying people did shit, saying that they are shit, etc.
Worse is, if you happen to have to do a catch up examen with him, you had to implement in 4 hours a program that took at least 20 hours of research.
But at the end of the year, students got asked with a poll how each classes of the year went. All the prom gave the feedback that was deserved.
The next year, wiht my prom, the teacher was extremely kind with us, but we all knew that was because his job was compromised. (And if I'm not wrong, he doesn't do that course anymore for engineers, fortunatly.) -
someone asks me : What do people not tell you about being a software engineer?
So the thing is , No one actually knows what they’re talking about.
See, the thing about building software is that usually you are inventing something.
Not in a pretentious way. I don’t mean “inventing something” as in inventing the light bulb, but I mean making something new that someone else hasn’t built before (well, hopefully — if you’re building something someone else already built, then you might be doing it wrong).
Because of this, people are usually just coming up with solutions based on what they think will work.
And that’s about the best you can do. Sure, the more experience you have, the more you can recognize certain patterns, or lay certain architectural foundations, but you’re mostly just coming up with something new. Maybe not 100% new, maybe some sort of slightly different thing than another thing that exists, but it’s still new.
So yeah, no one knows what they’re talking about. You’ll sit in meetings, with people talking about all kinds of smart-sounding stuff. Most people are trying their best to understand and play catch-up. No one wants to be the dumb one. People try to make it a science as much as possible, but if you really wanna be honest, people are just trying stuff and seeing if it works.
It’s not a bad thing. That’s just the nature of software development.6 -
So the saga of broken fucking everything continues at work, and I'm managing it, effectively, and doing it correctly on the first go-round. It's a long process though, because the two retards who preceded me were equally inept for completely different, yet equally disruptive and destructive reasons. The first dude was just plain psychotic, probably still is. I'd post some of his code, but I don't want anyone's face to melt off like those Nazi dudes at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. I can handle it because I'm constantly inebriated, which is not as fun as it sounds. If you have to ask yourself if you can handle it, you probably aren't, unless you've had to Uber to/from work due to still being fucking drunk. Anyway, enough about that, and it was only like twice. The rest of the times, I was more blazed than Jerry Garcia at a weed smoking contest. Moving along.
UPS shipping labels broke two weeks ago, I fixed it, but these fucking 10xers jointly decided to not only never implement anything resembling error handling, other than EMPTY GOD DAMN "try/catch"es (empty catch, wow so efficient), and instead of using COMMENTS, which I know are a new thing, they'd wrap blocks of code in something like: if 1 = 0 {} FUCK YOU DICKFACES. As I was saying before I got emotional again, they tied the success to all kinds of unrelated, irrelevant shit. I'm literally needle/haystacking my way through the entire 200GB codebase, ALONE, trying to find all the borked things. Helpfully, my phone is ringing all the time from customer service, complaining about things that are either nothing to do with the site, or due to user stupidity, 75% of the time.
A certain department at my company relies on some pretty specific documents to do their job, and these documents are/were generated from data in the database. So until I can find and fix all of the things, I've diverted my own attention as much as possible to the rapid implementation of a report generation microservice so that no one elses work is further disrupted while I continue my cursed easter egg hunt from fucking hell.
After a little more than two days, I'm about to lauch a standalone MS to handle the reports, and it's unfortunately more complicated than I'd like, because it requires a certain library that isn't available on Winblows, so I've dockerized the application. Anyway, just after lunch, I've finished my final round of tests, and I'm about ready to begin migrating it to the server and setting up (shitty fucking shit) IIS to serve it appropriately. At this point, this particular report has been unavailable by web for about 8 days.
A little after lunch, and with no forewarning of any kind, the manager of managers runs upstairs and screams at me to "work faster" and that "this needs to be back online RIGHT NOW", but I also know that this individual is going to throw a fit if things on this pdf aren't a pixel perfect match. So I just say "that's some amazing advice, I wish I'd had the foresight to just do it better and work faster". Silence for a good five seconds, then I follow up with "please leave and let me get back to my work". At that moment from around the corner, my "supervisor" suddenly, magically even, remembers that he has had the ability to print this crucial, amazingly super fucking important document all along, despite me directly asking him a week ago, and he prints it and takes it where it needs to go. In the time that it takes him to go to that other department and return, I deploy my service.
I spent the rest of the day browsing indeed and linkedin jobs, but damn this market is kinda weird right now, yeah?2 -
This was in 2001 on a legacy AIX core ops server. I got tired of waiting hours for the last page of a print job to debug totals. So, I added a print menu option to print it to an HTML file on a share served up by a wab server and send me the email link. Took two years to catch on but when it did, we eliminated all nightly print jobs and took the paper budget down by 90%. All because I was too lazy to keep reloading my desk jet with paper to debug reports and I forgot to take it off the menu.
-
The first company I worked for had a policy to not ship any release, service pack or hot fix as long as there were still open bugs with the severity "critical" or "blocker". They wanted to ship a service pack nonetheless, but without violating the rule and thus keeping their KPI unharmed. So the support guys got in touch with developers and asked them to lower the severity of certain "critical" bugs. They said we by all means need to write into the comments that the severity of those bugs has to be reset after the service pack was shipped, so that those important bugs would not be left behind.
- Support team violates the rules set up by themselves.
- Developers had the actual work of doing so (and the blame to catch).
- The Support team's KPI just remained unharmed.1 -
The term "technical debt" is poorly used. I hear folks of all stripes and roles proudly proclaim that they've "reduced technical debt" in some way. It's used as a catch all to describe some kind of supposedly beneficial change. I think it's just more software process word salad. Mostly because there seems to be some assumption that "Yay, that stuff that was changed is no longer a problem" when odds are that it will be changed again before too long for more "technical debt reduction". Software changes over time because the requirements change over time. I don't see the need for the phrase at all, and I think using it gives some false sense of accomplishment when really the constant change of code is the normal state.6
-
Because teams is a big fucking waste. Wonder why does it have to use all that cpu, fking pirece shit. They could have made it a simple chat platform, but not Microsoft.
Teams, you've been the main cause of my everyday struggles, and I gave you one last chance but you proved to really like to storm your shit.
F .. at this point we're playing catch me, why do you have to launch yourself again after I just killed you?!
use you crap from browser.6 -
!rant
Coworker: *Watching a DefCon talk*
Me: *walks over and notices an image on the slide of a woman sticking a cotton swab in her mouth with text saying "get paternity testing"*
Me: Paternity testing? But that's a woman!
Coworker: *silent for a second* What? Oh! *gets closer to screen, chuckles*
Coworker: It actually took me a second to catch that because I wasn't looking at the video, I was looking at the side "related videos" or the ad and I was like "no... did you mean Penetration Testing?" But even then, this is DefCon, so there aren't any women--or at least less than 3. And then I saw it in the corner and was like "Oh, I see it. But yeah, Paternity.... Oh wait..."
Me: Jeez, it really did take you a while...
Coworker: Yeah. All the while I was thinking "What the heck are you on," and then there was the "Oh, I get it" moment
Me: At least you got there -
Well Django, I think I've fucking HAD IT WITH YOUR STUPID FUCKING SHIT ALREADY.
./manage.py shell
In [1]: from inventory.models import ProductLine
In [2]: ProductLine
Out[2]: inventory.models.ProductLine
In [3]: ProductLine.objects
Out[3]: <django.db.models.manager.Manager at 0x7f03e23017b8>
SO WHY IN THE FUCKING FUCK DO I GET
"""
, in ProductLineViewSet
queryset = ProductLine.objects.all()
AttributeError: type object 'ProductLine' has no attribute 'objects'
"""
FUCK ME
I hope I just FORGET I am a programmer, wake up tomorrow free to go work at fucking McDonalds and die in mediocritity anyway. FIANLYL Get to catch up on fucking work and I have to diagnose this inane fuckign django model problem that I dont fucking see anywhere on google, SO, etc right now
Best I can find are all like "You've probably defined something else called <model class name> in that file." But Grep and I sure as fucking tits can't find it!!!!!
Time to fucking make an exact copy of everything but change it to ProductLine2 and watch it all work perfectly fucking hell am I really this stupid or am I going to eventually find a bug after hours of GETTING FUCKING NO WHERE OMN THE STRUPIDEST FUCKING SHUIT IVE EVER SEEN FUCK ME7 -
So...buffered query kept crashing even though I have a row limit of 10001 on my abstract datatables class. I didn't realize it was buffered because I grab the results in a for loop as a fetch. Well, I tracked it down to being the size of the email content that I'm selecting (and then using strip_tags and substring in PHP before returning to the front-end). So it's totally a catch-22 at this point because if I select let's say...substring 500 characters and most of that is line breaks and other html junk, I may only get a couple characters of normal text (or none at all) after stripping tags and doing a final substring to get the 50 characters of text I want to display. I said screw it and took the email content out of the table all together. You have to view it to see the content now. I should probably be storing a text-only version of the email, but argh..that's a lot of extra data.
-
After realizing that php.js is an actual thing, I'm thinking of ending all my sentences in.js, I think it's cool.js, might actually catch on.js and replace the period.js if everyone does it.js1
-
!rant
If any of you were wondering why all the panic when we keep hearing reports of so few people personally knowing anyone with covid19 symptoms, I think I just figured out why.
So as of yesterday, assume unofficially fatality is 15%. Yesterdays death total was 3861.
If we assume roughly 15% death rate, based on ten days average for a case to recover or die, then the cases that would be recovering today on april 1st would have been infected or started to show symptoms on march 22nd.
At that time there was 32882 cases total in the u.s.
Therefore for april 1st, that would mean by the end of the day today, if the ~15% fatality rate is accurate, there would be at least 4,932 fatalities logged today.
I don't know about you, but here it's almost 9am, not even halfway through the day, and we're already at 4067 deaths.
And now we get to the part where all this shit starts to make sense.
For a long time since this outbreak has started somethings been bugging me and I couldn't place what it was till now.
Why did it seem, no matter how high the numbers climbed, no matter how much this spread 'like the flu', no matter how hard I looked into it, very few people seemed to personally know anyone *in real life* who died or at least came down with this?
I mean we'd all heard the rumors that it was more lethal, and then mums the word, it seemed like media the world over simply except the official "it's only 2% lethal" line. Same as the line about it only infecting people of asian descent.
And it didn't make sense to me why the numbers were so high, and why all the panic if it's just the flu? I knew in the back of my mind it wasn't I just didn't have a specific reason why.
Here it is: This thing is still pretty contagious, but not as contagious as it *could* be with a lower fatality rate. And with a fatality rate at 15%, combine with *just sufficient* spread, it would continue to burn and fester in communities for a year or more until those panic-numbers we see on the news would become a real thing. And then no matter HOW flat we made the curve, it would be x5-x50 times worse than a bad flu.
So we get panic and fake numbers. Because you really don't want to catch this thing. It kills 1 in 6.6. And it spread just enough that it is hard to effectively fight.8 -
so, a new day, a new ERP software to rant about:
this one features an email feature (heh) but with a catch.
only pop3, no imap, if you want ssl the software suggest that you use a 3rd party program, also every user has to be logged in by the admin cause they assume the sysadmin knows all passwords cause he has "password lists"
i called them to ask why their software is what it is, they answer "there was never a need to develop an IMAP functionality, SSL would be so much work and it never became a problem that the sysadmin didnt know all passwords"
in unrelated news, does anyone know a nice sub 100K ERP software with CRM, Material Management and Offer/Order Management that runs on a local server and offers german support for a company in the 50 to 500 worker bracket? -
Not dev related so don't shoot me. If you like writing I figure you maybe might enjoy this and thought I'd share.
This is a section from an unfinished novel about 2050s America, set in a corporate subsidized mega-fevela sprawling across washington state, ruled by gangs and patrolled by the officers of a bankrupt nation suffering through austerity and on-and-off again spasms of mass civil conflict.
"Averice - Sex, drugs, and vice, in the downfall and dying days of america."
we lived in a smoke government, where everything was bullshit they blew up your ass so you could continue make believe while
you were bent over with your head in the hole in the ground you mistook for your ass to start with. And if you questioned it all, one bit, the mouth organ of the state would command
hate upon you, like an old latin curse, with a lexicon armada of phrases like "terrorist", and "troubled individual" to character assassinate you by drowning you in the humbling river of societies mass delusion giver, those two sweet letters "TV."
No, we were on the industry edge here, inventing better bait to catch what the state politiburo labelled 'bandits', all for what?
It had, in later years become fashionable to call those who didn't want to be stolen from any more, projected as it were, "thieves", in the same fashion as those in the middle east, defending
their homeland from foreigners, were labelled "insurgents." Tyranny had not so long ago grown a sense of irony it would seem.
And if you became enemy number one of the state, as thousands were, you would spend your days on the run, always looking over your
shoulder for the states vanish vans--black escalades with men in dark suits and mirrored glasses, like bugmen with shiny inhuman, and inscrutable eyes full of alien malice.
These were sordid summers, full of plastic playhouses where the cost of a days wages you could lay with a synthetic lover and pay away the days tense tax for a good lay, and forget your toils and troubles. And so many were kept in poverty because of easy habit and routine that they forget they were not living.
But for me, I had none of it. I preferred the troubled thing on the corner when I could coax one into my state issued sedan. She was sulky, with bright blonde curls, 19, maybe 20, with empty eyes, as if watching some invisible horizon. And in the glow of the blue neon, among the wet sidewalks, and trash, she leaned into my car. No words were exchanged. I nodded, and
she got into the car, a miniskirt, and slinky little handbag.
This was no more than state business with a bureau guy like me, and for her, little more than the prison trade taken public.
She huffed some powder and climbed spraddle leg onto my lap, grabbing me along my jawline, eyes locked onto the depths of my soul, and
for the next ten minutes as she moved on top of me, I was motionless property while my lusts became animal, and she, my cream cup.
After, I arrested her to the standard protests, but she new the game and quickly hushed. This was the verdant arithmetic of the state. I was awarded x amount of pension points for every criminal, no matter how, and it was no gentle hand, not the judge, not the jury, or the executioner of their will. It was the rigid touch of a long arm, dislocated from the law, and now, like frankenstein's monster, cobbled onto the mechanism of the state not unlike the manner of a combine harvester.
We were the owners of all by virtue of all we could take, and we took all we could get. The serial romeos of state police power, romancing
the unwilling citizenry with televised patriotism and five minute power talks at the beginning of the corporate day.
It could be paradise or a wasteland if we wanted it to be. And for a time it was.
Edit: devrant always breaks my formatting. sigh. -
Browser automation is a PITA. I’m going on my fourth side mission with this crap and I honestly still look like a newbie. I’ve tried Java Selenium with Chrome, Excel VBA with IE9, Vanilla JS in the browser console, and tonight I’m thinking to concoct some kind of hybrid CDP & Selenium approach in Chrome. Never used CDP before, not even sure where to start but I heard it sucks like anything else unless you get some extra libraries and plugins and stuff.
It doesn’t help that I can’t get just anything I want from our IT Department. It would be another PITA to ask for puppeteer. If puppeteer is totally legit please let me know.
Selenium sucks. The buttons don’t click, the waits don’t wait. Its unusable. Iframes are annoying as all hell but I can deal with that. HTML Tables suck too. It doesn’t help I have to restart my whole java program and whole Chrome every time an element doesn’t get picked correctly. Scripting one single element can take all fucking night.
Chrome dev tools what the fuck. Why the fuck is the DOM explorer in the same window as the web page I’m working on?? I can’t undock it. Am I supposed to use a fucking TV screen to work with this bastard?? If I use the remote chrome tools on port 9225 or whatever - It Still Renders The Whole Fucking Page Alongside The Console. Get Out Of My Way!!! The nested HTML CODE IS ONE CHARACTER WIDE ALL THE TIME. I can’t for the life of me figure out what the fuck I’m looking at. Haven’t you people ever heard of A HORIZONTAL SCROLL BAR at least.
Fuck I tried using getElementById, and the Xpath thing and its not all that great seeing I have seemingly 1000s of nested Divs all over the god damned place oftentimes containing a single element. I’m finally on chrome now should I learn Jquery now? I mean seriously wtf.
I use this one no code tool for dev it has web automation built in. As you can imagine its just as broken as anything else!! I have 10 screens to navigate it gets stuck on the second screen all the damn time. Fuck I love clicking the buttons when my script misses and playing catch up with it.
So as a work around to Selenium not waiting even 1 millisecond when I use explicit wait or implicit wait or fluent wait, I’m guessing maybe I can attach both Chrome Dev Tools Protocol (CDP as ive called it earlier) and selenium to the same browser and maybe I can use CDP to perform a Wait with any degree of success. Selenium will do nothing more than execute vanilla javascript Element.click(); This is the only way I know to even ACTUALLY use selenium beyond the simplest html documents possible. Hell I guess CDP can execute js idk.
I can’t get the new selenium that has CDP but I do have some buggy ass selenium from a few years back. Yeah, I remember reading there was a pretty impactful regression defect in the version I have. Maybe I’m being gaslighted by some shit copy of selenium?
The worst part is that I do seem to be having issues that the rest of the internet’s devs do not seem to be having. People act like browser automation is totally viable and pretty OK. How in the fuck hell is my Selenium Test Suite going to be more reliable my application under test?!!?? I’ll have more fucking bugs in my test suite than in my application. Today, I have less than half a test script and, I. already. fucking. do.
I am still SUPER PISSED at the months of 12 hour days (always 8 hours spent on normal sprint work btw only 4 to automation) I spent trying to automate our regression tests. I got NOWHERE.
I did learn a lot about HTML and JS though like I’m not that mad…but I’m just trying to emphasize my achievement on my task was zero.
The buttons don’t click. There are so many divs and I swear you sometimes need to select a div somewhere in the middle sometimes to get it working. The waits don’t wait. XHR requests are invisible. Java crashes 100 times before I find an xpath and thread.sleep() combo that works. I have no failure modes to use — Sometimes I click the same element 20x in a script because I have no way to know if it clicked the first time! Sometimes you gotta scroll the page to make the click work. So many click methods all broken. So many wait methods all broken. Its not just the elements don’t click! There are so many ways to click that almost work but surely they all fail the same in the end. ok at this point I’m just repeating myself…
there yet even more issues that I can’t remember…and will soon remember as I journey into this project yet again…
thanks for reading I hope I entertained and would love to hear your experience!5 -
There was a department. Long time ago their work was somewhat complicated: background checks of businesses, websites, ToSes, assuring agreement compliance, some risk management on top. They started as small 3 people team but over the years they were hiring new employees to catch up with the growing customer base. They were still struggling. Few years back we've integrated 3rd party services to help them and, finally, their backlog was gone!
In January they complained about how much more work they have since the merger so I inquired about which process was troublesome, what was the flow, etc., and it turned out to be very... Tinder-like - the issue was the sheer number of cases:
1. open a case,
2. check results in few windows,
3. if green + green + green, move right.
4. else move left.
It was ridiculous, I wouldn't stand for that. I sat for an hour, made some ghosting scripts that followed same business logic and saved results alongside their actual decisions. Last week I compared the two and there was zero difference so I green-lit it with my boss and pushed to prod.
Oh, the happiness on their faces when they heard the news, the disbelief, the tears of joy!
And then it happened. After 4 years of being cautious not to stir the waters I did it again. Yesterday I accidentally replaced 17 people department with 3 scripts. How was I supposed to know it was *all* they were doing??1 -
A medical equipment that you can attach to employees and excruciatingly kill them as soon as they say things like (please note that the list is not limited and we should use a speech to text API to provide NLP states for the meaning - I want to catch all false negatives!! Kill them all!!!!):
- It works on my machine
- I tested it before!
- Haskell is a terrible language
- Big data and actionable insights
- why do you need unit tests here?
- I am a recruiter
- Anything that comes with the following construction as well: "I don't have anything against X, but..."
Any other suggestions of phrases?2 -
This morning I found out that the code I wrote to convert json data to a new format in our DB was giving errors and a bunch of questions got saved with the wrong property. It was assumed when it was triaged with my boss that we would only see one key property so the code written by me so the code was aimed at that. Well some questions have multiple keys for no reason. They are mostly floating data that hasn't been wiped clean because the develop who wrote this use json data in psql with no validation or data cleaning. This edge case was also never caught on PR reviews and we got a pretty heavy review process. I'm not being blamed for it. Most of it I think all the devs feel bad we didn't catch this because it affected us greatly. I've been working all morning trying to resolve it with my boss and just now in the evening we stopped. I just feel like I'm not a good dev at all and just want advice on how to deal with situations like this. I'm a new dev and this is my first job I have held for almost a year2
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That rabbit in my grandpa's left table drawer, in the home I grew at. I wanted to finally catch it, and kill it. I was bad with animals all along, especially this one. My grandpa died the year before I was born, and my grandma said we would've got along really well. So much to talk about, a scientist to an engineer. So, I travelled back, but my home somehow turned from a city stone-walled house into a half-soaked, decaying wooden one. I caught that rabbit though, but while I was holding it at its neck and twisting it, it somehow disappeared, distributed evenly as if I were twisting a crayon. I was trying to find it, but in that left drawer, among century-old pencils and that red liquid thermometer I played with as a kid, only a faded out, dusty duckling resided. I picked it up, and unlike the rabbit, it was paper, no, cigarette paper thin. It wasn't hostile. It wasn't trying to run away. It just turned from yellow to grey, feathers leaving my fingers covered in fine dust. I realized it will never die, dwelling and decaying there forever, happy.
I did my calculations, and I knew for a fact when and where the rabbit should've appeared. It was the middle drawer, not the left one. I opened it and looked in anticipation how something chewed through the bottom. I caught it, but it was no rabbit, it was an alive, rubber rat. The rubber was white turned grey, old, aged, dusty, probably Soviet. I poked the rat's eye with a pen rod, but the rat's body inflated a bit, leaving it invincible. It was mocking me.
Of the same white rubber, a ball appeared. I knew for a fact it was alive too, I felt the bones inside holding it. I found its lips, and was prying it open. The massive, dry mouth emerged, with a full set of human teeth, albeit wider and nastier ones. Huge eyes looked at me. It was alive, it was intelligent. It was my grandpa's personal financial assistant all along. It told me to leave the rat and the rabbit alone. He told me not to worry about the ducking, as it was in safe hands.
It made friends with my brother during the "blue age", when he was wearing thin, worn out rugs instead of clothes, tiny faded blue flowers on them, screaming and annoying my grandma he lived with in that room, not a single person other than the two in sight. The house was slowly submerging. The water was rising.2 -
When I was young I tried to catch all the pokemons but "finally" now I "try" to "catch" all errors...
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I’m a mid level dev in a team of three devs (one jr and another “mid”), but the other mid is super lost all the time and is pretty much useless.
I have to do all his work because he can’t seem to handle simple tasks. He’s taking the whole sprint to do stuff that takes me or even the Jr dev less than 3 days.
I have no idea how he managed to get mid position in the first place. I don’t have a problem in helping someone catch up, but I feel like I’m basically explaining technical stuff to my mom. Nothing seems to catch up on him.
I’ve already talked to my manager about him, but unfortunately we are understaffed so she feels it’s unsafe to get rid of him, but I’m starting to consider taking up the load instead of having to deal with him much longer. This shit is honestly stressing me out so much I’ve considered simply quitting.2 -
At my work we have this most generous benefit, free lunch and one hour lunch break. There's one little catch though, our lunch coupons only apply in one of two restaurants. Which one, depends on weekday. Mondays and Thursdays we go to this worthless place called Kvarter 5. Today our one-hour break was a complete waste of time as the food never arrived. GRRRR!!! I get grumpy when I'm hungry! :( I waited patiently for 50 minutes and then gave up, demanding my lunch coupon back, and had lunch at Sagulthai (thai buffet, tasty food, ready to grab with no need to wait). Some of my colleagues staid until the food eventually arrived. They told it wasn't worth the wait. The salmon was burnt and the chicken salad rather bland. Heck no, from now on I'll skip free lunch two days a week. There are so many better restaurants in town, like all of them2
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Funny login screen bug: the title and the jokes changed, but the image did not.
(This is partly photoshopped, since I couldn't catch all the 3 "hot spots" open together in a single print screen)1 -
Never Ending Project
"What's make software development great?"
"What's it?"
"We must catch bugs all the time."
"Oh..."1 -
My most consistent enemy at work is this fucking system I have to work in, holy shit. Not only is there no default support for shit you would really think there should be, no real control over the interfaces with the UI, and the far too complicated method they use to magically make said interfaces, but we also have to use their build environment to build this shitty thing. So builds take anywhere from 4 to 12 minutes a pop and ridiculous style guide will stop the build, no questions asked, for dumb violations like spaces between if and (. And it doesn't catch these, sometimes, until 7 or 8 minutes in. I have wasted so much time on this. And seeing as we work in 2 week sprints that are really 7 to 10 day sprints based on whatever hair goes up my bosses ass and have to deliver feature complete in those two weeks, I can't really afford all this nonsense. I used to joke about having an alcohol problem, but I think I actually may be developing one at this point.
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I think I've asked this before. Just cropped up again cuz I'm pushed to do some stuff in nextjs
I Wonder how much longer before js framework devs realise they've been reverse engineering the browser this whole time, that the current browser spec was outdated since the dawn of Web fidelity and real time applications
I wonder whether there are some guys who have seen this and are already cooking in the background. The browser still treats the Internet like front end and back end, whereas with the way apps are going (eg deprecation of the front/back end roles), it seems apparent the browser needs to scale up by fading whatever js is now
I'm seeing "use server", which was one of php's infamous atrocities back in the day (lack of separation of concerns, everything in index.php). It's shocking how those who ridicule that language let this fly, but that's probably a separate thread. Point is, a bunch of these stuff done by front end frameworks seem like boilerplate but the syntax is far different from what I remember javaScript to be. I only vaguely recollect and understand what I'm reading
Why not merge all the cryptic syntaxes struggling to achieve bare minimal expectations, into advanced markup language controlled by dom attributes? Overhaul and Rethink client - server communication to fit modern standard. Someone needs to step out of the box and take a good look at the rat race. I find our lives would be made much simpler if api integration into client side behaviour wasn't a separate thing altogether
You have all these funny hoops and precarious bridges to cross. The reality is what we're fighting to overcome is the manner the architecture is setup. We need a Google/meta/amazon/apple to step in with a new browser since it's not a weekend gig and might need their reach to catch on with mainstream users. Sadly, they're the same guys rolling out new js frameworks2 -
One of the worst practices in programming is misusing exceptions to send messages.
This from the node manual for example:
> fsPromises.access(path[, mode])
> fsPromises.access('/etc/passwd', fs.constants.R_OK | fs.constants.W_OK)
> .then(() => console.log('can access'))
> .catch(() => console.error('cannot access'));
I keep seeing people doing this and it's exceptionally bad API design, excusing the pun.
This spec makes assumptions that not being able to access something is an error condition.
This is a mistaken assumption. It should return either true or false unless a genuine IO exception occurred.
It's using an exception to return a result. This is commonly seen with booleans and things that may or may not exist (using an exception instead of null or undefined).
If it returned a boolean then it would be up to me whether or not to throw an exception. They could also add a wrapper such as requireAccess for consistent error exceptions.
If I want to check that a file isn't accessible, for example for security then I need to wrap what would be a simple if statement with try catch all over the place. If I turn on my debugger and try to track any throw exception then they are false positives everywhere.
If I want to check ten files and only fail if none of them are accessible then again this function isn't suited.
I see this everywhere although it coming from a major library is a bit sad.
This may be because the underlying libraries are C which is a bit funky with error handling, there's at least a reason to sometimes squash errors and results together (IE, optimisation). I suspect the exception is being used because under the hood error codes are also used and it's trying to use throwing an exception to give the different codes but doesn't exist and bad permissions might not be an error condition or one requiring an exception.
Yet this is still the bane of my existence. Bad error handling everywhere including the other way around (things that should always be errors being warnings), in legacy code it's horrendous.6 -
Had food poisoning and was out for 2 days. Now we're all 100 wfh cuz of coronavirus so I was going to catch up. But then our build and deploy engine went down and since it is controlled by a third party vendor, we have to wait for the ticket to be fixed. I think the powers that be are telling me to get drunk, fuck the schedule.
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Why is it always the case when you give your cide to QA they find more bugs than you? Even though developers write test cases, why can't we catch them all?4
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Javascript library developers - FFS please stop using try...catch blocks to detect features. Makes the "break on all exceptions" debugging feature FUCKING USELESS.
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I'm more pissed than I've been in awhile. With classes coming back soon and having to catch up to my classmates in college and as a developer, have to work part-time to pay off debt. Now I just found out that I have high cholesterol at EIGHTEEN and need to exercise regularly. All this putting off has now crashed down on me and I have no idea how I'm going to do this all at once. For the sake of my future (and my heart), how the heck am I gonna do all this?2
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I have a Angular webapp that's minified in production. And it's throwing an error thought it seems to get caught by a catch-all and relayed to a toast message.
Is there anyway to trace it back to the source code?11 -
What’s up with all the “To Catch a Predator” and Chris Hansen videos showing up on my YouTube recommendations. Apparently, too many people have been binging on them in this lockdown.2
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The project needs to make bigger changes to a module. A guy starts doing the changes. It turns out that the task is bigger than we though originally. Team lead has a brilliant idea: you need help. So he'll assign couple of more guys to do the same change.
What's the catch? The catch is that we are now all changing the same files. The code is a mess and tweaks and hacks are needed all over the place. So basically one guy changes the files and others just watch YouTube and wait for him to commit. The it's your turn to change the files and the first guy watches PornHub.
You could all just try to edit the same files at the same time, but we all know how GIT feels about that. You change random lines, he changes random lines, someone else changes random lines, all merges go to shit, nothing works and we spend 2x more time on just trying to get it compiling again.2 -
I love everything about the Nvidia Tx2 board...except the ARM64 architecture. Catch me constantly building shit from source :(
Seriously though, I wish there was just one, universal open source processor architecture standard to rule them all.1 -
Called in for an interview for graphic design, didn't get it. Same company contacts me a few months later for a web design opening. I get the job. They were behind on graphic design work, so my first few months were helping them to catch up. One day they asked how the web site was going. I was like, uh, you've been scheduling me graphic design since I started. It took a few more months to get my plate cleared completely but I was able to finally build out their site and a photo appointment scheduler that we could all love.
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I have a long question for developers out there... bear with me.
I'm currently learning and devoting all my time towarda Java and have been for the past two years although it's moving slow because of summer courses. The catch to this is, I'm not sure what I'm learning it for. How do I implement this code, I'm not sure what to do with it. The only project I plan on doing is a discord server management bot... besides that, I'm blank... Is java used in web development? What exactly should I be using it for..?
I'm planning on learning javascript, php, mySQL, and CSS I pretty much have down but I don't know what to use them for. Besides how I want to script for the game Hackmud which is in javascript.
I'll put it into simpler terms... I love java and I'm looking forward to mastering it but I don't know what to use it for. I want to use it on my free time and all but use it for what? One more thing: what other languages go hand in hand with java? Sorry if it's confusing lol.3 -
Me and a friend are making a discord bot, and added a warning command to warn users.
All was going well, and when we tested the deleting a warning it seemed fine. I then tried to delete all the warnings one by one, when we came across a problem. It wont delete the last warning in the array, the 1st, 2nd, 3rd etc? Thats fine, just the last index that isnt working.
Our code is like this:
list = data.warns//a list of JSON format warnings
console.log(list)//shows the value is in the list
console.log(list[index])//shows the value
delete list[index]
console.log(list)//shows its gone
data.warns = list;
console.log(data.warns)//shows the value is still no longer present
data.save().catch(blah blah)//no error is caught, and nothing crashes, it proceeds to send a message to the channel after this
but then the value at index is still there in the database as if it didn't save it, but only if the index is the last item in the array.
We have been stuck on this for over an hour and I now remember why I hate programming.2 -
So i am at an MNC as a summer internship, me along with 18 other students from my university cleared this hackathon and got selected for this internship,
Few things you should know
1. Amongst all the other candidates i had the most work experience
2. I had worked with a lot of python and JavaScript
3. I legit have more skills then almost everyone working in my team
So, I don't know how but the HR decided i should go to this team, where there are no developers and are people of age 30 who have no idea what django is,
I was fucking frustrated but i let it go, thinking i will just solve this problem and will change my team, calm down
They told me about the project. I said okay give me access i will just finish it.
5 days no signs of access anyhow, so, i sucked it up and tracked all the network request and made my own api,
Then I was happy i get rid of this project,
But then they had bigger plans they ask me to add features on this project but there is a catch you have no access to any accounts, do it on your own,
Like What the Fuck, before giving an intern any project don't you have the responsibility to check weather the fucking project is possible i am just wasting my summer internship. I thought I got a big company it will help me grow i will get job security, but noo wtf, i am hell of frustrated1 -
@SidTheITGuy - please help enlighten me. You claimed 1 was Ignorant of Indians... you may just be right... so im coming straight to you about this specific, foreign topic. Im assuming you have expertise with softcolon, right???
So... Ive had one hell of a day (well... a month and still pretty hell of a yr tbh)...
Due to some work-related reason to look at an associate's LinkedIn, I ended up curiously clicking the profile of a sole respondent to a post...
ROFLOL (near literally-- extremely rare for me).
I read it like 10x... going through every, oftenly plausible rationale for what I was making sure wasn't just dyslexia, thinking in non-english, some typo or even some new trendy crap that i was unaware of.
Do to my tendency to avoid tons of new dev/tech terms...
I even briefly wondered if it was some new term for using whitespace formatting instead of semicolons in js (fyi, i prefer coding in giant unformatted blocks, in notepad.exe... you will never catch me w/o explicit ;'s).
Now i really wanna just contact this guy and ask him how/why he chose this business name.
I cut out his pic/name... but, tbh, as someone who's innately amazing at SEO, i must admit, he's got some seriously impressive SEO.
The entire 1st page of google results (after asking if i meant "softcolor"...idfk what that is), was all his company, even an Insta. My locale is germany/deutsch... technically i do also have Hindi pages as allowed/dont auto-trans... but what i searched on and what i was using for linkedin, barely resolve to the same country, no shared anything.24 -
Compare and harmonize the web configs
Oh no someone set execution timeouts to 14 days
Fuck fuck fuckity duck
Hey compare all the web configs of all environments and harmonize them all wtf cmon bruh do your job as a developer
Take them and back them up into svn. What do you mean svn isn't a back up system of course it is well its the only thing we have fuck
What do you mean we have shit logging where people will catch an exception and only print the word exception in the log you can figure it out can't you we have live produxtion issues that hace to be solved now what the fuck
How dare you make a. Mistake copying our shitload of a bloated codebase and configuring our 100s of different options all by fukcing hand what the fuck dude do yoh write anyrhing down?
Please catalogue all the exception mails we are getting but we have no db or error reporting system so they all just plop into tue inbox and thats all ypur fuckjng data figure it out kid
This is a rewarding, fulfilling job whwrw you can be both dev ops and a developer and manage all of our fucking environments of which there are about 15 of all your own with no sort of tool or software to aid you because haha what the fuck we wouldn't make your life easy
Whata that you want to spend time to write stuff or change stuff that will nake it easier fot you fuxk that bruh get back to your biklable tasks like holy shit you thjnk this is a charity ofr aomw shit
Live production issues
Live production issues
Produxtion issues. A ghost in the machine. Find it fix if find it fix it find it fix it cmon why can't you fix it I expect you to spend your day hopelessly pretending to try to solve something you fucker
One of the only peopel able to help you sometimes though hes a bit of an old laxky, yeah hea fucking leaving see ya seeya kid and now we're not hirinf anyone to fuckjng help you no no no managing and monitoring the environments its your jov alll fof them every sngle on do you knkw all the xonfiguraiton values for them yet??
Instead we are hiring a new sales person to fucking make us some more money and we don't need naother seceloper to help you infqct lets have you use this mid end retail computer from 2014 to develop on yeah yeah oh but all our shitty code and visual studip will destry your memory but too bad!! Hahahahahdhsj
Go lice is all you, why sare you so slow
How long will it take
How long will it take
How long will it take
How long witll it tqk2
How long will it take holy shit
Give time estimate for sonethign that I don't fucking know how about it will tqke till fuxk you oxloxk4 -
iPad passcode,iTunes
I get home from work after a busy day in the office and try to use my iPad to catch on some Android books had saved for offline reading there.
I can't use the devii as it's off and so power it up and coming back later to use my buggy mind can't recall the passcode.
To make it worse hadn't synched it with iTunes on my machine and am fucked.
I try some few passcodes with no avail and call the shorts a full reset though all have to lose all data damn Tim Cook and company. -
WSL GUI... WHY?!?!
I have an assistant(no better defined title) in Myanmar who we've ruined from ever being a "normal" 21yr old Burmese kid again... First non-android computer experience was remote access to our local RHEL server; He's gonna be a dev... being a blank slate, started him primarily on CLI.
Yesterday he tells me wsl stopped working and he can't figure out why. I ofc asked what the last thing(s) he did was... simple wget. I tunnel in, check processes... one of the catch-all wsl ones had hulked out.
Despite very limited abilty to trace whatever was going on, I found what I thought may be responsible. Quickest way to know, kill it...
Whatever will we do without GUI for wsl debian?!?!?
Seriously... the wsl Deb culled things like systemd for simplicity... but arrives loaded with numerous GUI functionalities. I reeeeeallly want to know what advanced practical applications are coming from this -
Hey DevRant,
I know there is a range of devs here from novice to expert. So I wanted to get feedback on a platform I was building.
Essentially it's a web platform where Devs can authenticate with their Github profiles and all their repos (non-forked) and pulled to the website to quickly create a portfolio for the users. I currently have two templates users can switch between I plan on adding more if it begins to catch on.
Besides that users will be able to message and find each based on their skills to possibly connect with one another to work on projects together.
I have a lot of features I want to implement, but it wouldn't make sense to do those things now, I would have to wait for the user base to reach a certain milestone.
So I just wanted to share it and get everyone's feedback and possibly if you see value in it to share it with their own companions
Link: http://dev-chain.herokuapp.com -
How do you handle error checking? I always feel sad after I add error checking to a code that was beautifully simple and legible before.
It still remains so but instead of each line meaning something it becomes if( call() == -1 ) return -1; or handleError() or whatever.
Same with try catch if the language supports it.
It's awful to look at.
So awful I end up evading it forever.
"Malloc can't fail right? I mean it's theoetically possible but like nah", "File open? I'm not gonna try catch that! It's a tmp file only my program uses come oooon", all these seemingly reasonable arguments cross my head and makes it hard to check the frigging errors. But then I go to sleep and I KNOW my program is not complete. It's intentionally vulnerable. Fuck.
How do you do it? Is there a magic technique or one has to reach dev nirvana to realise certain ugliness and cluttering is necessary for the greater good sometimes and no design pattern or paradigm can make it clean and complete?15 -
Can anyone please help me troubleshooting my PC? My PC won't boot even to BIOS. This happened several times in the past but usually jiggling the cables would do the trick, this time it doesn't.
What happened: PC powered up, power light went on, all fans turned on just fine, hdd light turned on for a few seconds before turning off, monitor didn't catch any signal from the HDMI
What I have tried with no luck:
- unplugged and replugged SATA cables, fans, mobo 24 and 8-pins connectors
- moved the harddisk to another SATA and power connector
- flushed the CMOS memory
- removed RAMs
- unplugged speaker, keyboard and mouse
- switched it on without the HDD connected
Any suggestions?9 -
This is a repost of an original rant posted on a request for "Community Feedback" from Atlassian. You know, Atlassian? Those beloved people behind such products as :
• Thing I Love™
• Other Thing You Used One Time™
• Platform Often Mentioned in Suicide Notes, Probably™*
Now this rant was written in early 2022 while I was working in an Azure Cloud Engineer role that transformed into me being the company's main Sysadmin/Project Manager/Hiring Manager/Network Admin/Graphic Designer.
While trying to simultaneously put out over 9000 fires with one hand, and jangling keys in the face of the Owner/Arsonist with the other, I was also desperately implementing Jira Service Desk. Normally this wouldn't have been as much of a priority as it was, but the software our support team was using had gone past 15 years old, then past extended support, then the lone developer died, then it didn't work on Windows 10, then only functioned thanks to a dev cohort long past creating a keygen....which was now broken. So we needed a solution *now*.
The previous solution was shit of a different tier. The sight of it would make a walking talking anthropomorphised sentient puddle of dogshit (who both eats and produces further dookie derivatives) blush with embarrassment. The CD-ROM/Cereal Box this software came in probably listed features like "Stores Your Customer's First AND (or) Last Name!" or "Windows ME Downgrade Disk Included!" and "NEW: Less(-ish) Genocide(s)"!
Despite this, our brain/fearless leader decided this would be a great time to have me test, implement, deploy, and train everyone up on a new solution that would suck your toes, sound your shaft, and that he hadn't reminded me that I was a lazy sack enough lately.
One day, during preliminary user testing I received an email letting me know that the support team was having issues with a Customer's profile on our new support desk. Thanks to our Owner/Firestarter/Real World Micheal Scott being deep in his latest project (fixing our "All 5 devs quit in the last 12 months and I can't seem to hire any new ones" issue (by buying a ping pong table)), I had a bit of fortuitous time on my hands to investigate this issue. I had spent many hours of overtime working on this project, writing custom integrations and automations, so what I found out was crushing.
Below is the (digitally) physical manifestation of my rage after realising I would have to create / find / deal with a whole new method for support to manage customer contacts.
I'm linking to the original forum thread because you kind of need to have the pictures embedded in said reply to get really inhale the "Jira-Rant" ambiance. The part where I use several consecutive words as anchor links to tickets with other people screaming into the void gets a bit sweet n' savoury too - having those hyperlinks does improve the je ne say what of it all.
bit.ly/JIRANT (Case Sensitive)
--------------------------
There is some good news at the end of this brown n' squirty rainbow though!
Nice try silly little Jira button, you can't ruin *my* 2022!
• I was able to forget all about Jira a month later when I received a surprise vacation home! (To be there while my Mom passed away).
• Eventually work stress did catch up to me - but my boss thoughtfully gave me a nice long vacation! (By assaulting *while* firing me (for emailing in a vacation request while he was a having a bad (see:normal) day))5 -
Need some help,
I am setting up postfix and I need it to accept all emails, from any domain (without a domain list), and forward it to a local address on the machine (It pipes into PHP, toscript@).
I have a catch-all working where it is forwarding the emails to the toscript@ mailbox dispite of the to address. But if I send an email to it that is not in the domain list it gets rejected as it's not in the domain list, Is their a known way to force Postfix to accept all domain emails without having a list of the domains in the server.
I have searched but no luck of a working solution, I have looked at the following with no working solution
Server Fault: 133190
Server Fault: 422468
Server Fault: 179419
Server Fault: 105641
Server Fault: 161321
Server Fault: 318426
Server Fault: 514643
Server Fault: 410053
Stack Overflow: 4772229
Super User: 353488
Looking at the docs I do not see anything for it but making it an open relay but I can't figure what settings to update to make it the open relay to capture all of the mail.
I know I am missing something but I can't figure out what it is!
::Rant::
I'd like to use Postfix as it seems very stable and it's not a hack job as some of the projects that I have seen. It also can communicate with all of the proper channels for SMTP and the Protocol as well as some very easy configs.2 -
ADVICE: I’ve been assigned someone I was told was mid weight developer for a ‘fast paced project.’ I’ve quickly discovered he doesn’t understand core concepts and is likely very junior; this means I am picking up all the slack to cover for him.
We’ve had to ditch every PR he’s made so far and I’ve had to pair up with him to explain each one, from scratch, step by step.
Not sure what to do, he’s a nice guy, but I’m going to burn myself out if I have to do everything, it’s not acceptable and there is enough pressure on me already.
Do I request for him to be moved off the project, talk with him about my frustrations or raise my concern with the product owner with some evidence?
I get that no one comes to work to do a bad job, but I have my own shit to work on, and don’t fancy doing late night catch ups before every demo tbh1 -
Anybody like to rip up CTF (or similar)? I've honestly never done a CTF before, I'd like to give jt a shot. I'll get my ass handed to me because I'm not back up to par on OpSec yet, but I adapt well and when I get into a nice groove I can make shit happen! (I like to think so, anyways haha!!)
I've been in full on dev mode lately and haven't had any time to Hulk Smash for a while... I went to fire up a new Kali live USB today and I couldn't run through the updates like I always have- they changed sooo much and I was pissed because I didn't have ethernet with me. That'll be another day for sure, but I still have my machine with Manjaro armed to the nutsack and back with the BlackArch rep. I def could use a break from the chaos, and getting my ass handed right to me sounds like an awesome time because learning is my favorite thing next to a possible chance at getting to destroy shit.
It's weird, because I'm sort of a n00b but also at the same time I've had computers ripped apart/jammed in my face since every day since I was 9 and Y2K was about to hit the fan lmao!! My hardware/network/layering knowledge is fuckin mint titties, I just can't code like a fuckin madman on the fly. I don't have a "primary" language, because I've been having to work with little bits of several languages for extended periods of time... I can at least find my way around all the dox without much of an issue and have no issue solving the probs I come across which is neat, but until the day comes where I can fuck a gaping hole through my keyboard on the fly like George Hotz during one of his lazy Sunday OpenCV SLAM/Python code streams all jacked up on Herba Mate hahahahaha!!!!
The dude uses fucking VIM and codes faster than anyone I've ever seen on levels of science/math so challenging I almost shit myself inside out when I catch one!!!! The level of respect I have for all my fellow red pills in here is as high as it gets, and that's one of the best parts about being a code junkie- sometimes ya get to cross paths with beastly, out of this world people that teach you so much without even having to explain shit.
If anyone's down, or maybe has some resources for me to check out so I can get my chops up let's make it happen -
So, some data need to be prepared during the summer and the diverse departments' elected data processors got shared in a Google spreadsheet they will need to fill with some basic data IT needs. Simple, straightforward data entry, with nothing private nor confidential. Just another divide-and-conquer-style large amount of data to enter & organise, that's all.
Today, I received a new comment notification as the owner of the spreadsheet. You can imagine my surprise when I saw that, for some f*cked up reasons, one of the guys just wrote the super-admin username & pw for one of the main data systems we use in a freaking comment in the spreadsheet... WTF...
Oh, and also, juuust in case, he also wrote the pin code that is normally required to pass through the device-check when you log-in as a super-admin from an unknown device and/or location.
Fortunately I could catch it on time, but this just ruined half of my day.
I am supposedly on freaking annual leave. Ha Ha. Ha.