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HR: We have received complain that you have been sexually harassing an intern.
Me: No, I wasn’t. Me and the new intern all we talk about is Coding, Apps, and TV-Series
HR: You are lying. I have the words that you said to the intern. Do you want me to read it out.
Me: I have no clue what I said to the intern so please read it out.
HR: You said, “Always pull before you push”. Do you remember saying this?
Me: Yes, I was teaching the intern how to use GIT.
HR: Okay, let me call the intern and let see if he says the same.
** Intern **
HR: Was he sexually harassing you today at any time.
HR: Did he said, “Pull before you push” to you?
HR: What does that mean, sounds like a slang for something sexual.
Intern: haha, no it means that I should pull the changes made to the files before I can push the changes I did to the code from my computer.
HR: But he said something else like he was teaching you how to use GIT
Intern: Yes, that’s what GIT is.
HR: Okay both of you can go and don’t use this type of terms in the future it doesn’t make good working culture.52
I was told during my initial interview that the book "Clean Code" is their Bible here.
And it's true. It's lying, unread in drawers and shelves all over the office.15
We have a bunch of white people in human resources that are trying to hire "diverse" people because the company sets HR diversity targets. Which is an inherently racist way of hiring someone.
I am told to interview this guy who claims to have Angular experience. Before the interview I ask to see a form that he has built in Angular. He sends me a repo which is ripped off of an open source project and has the readme and git commits removed. A quick web search shows that it isn't his work. He shows up to the interview and I find out he is from a Southern African country. I deliberately ask some questions about code that I can see he didn't write that I prepared ahead of time. He lies to me and tells me all about how he wrote it which showed me that he has no idea what the code does. I tell HR they better not hire him because he was very comfortable lying to me, and I'm confident that he doesn't understand any of the code that he showed me. I do not trust this guy and would never choose to work with him. HR lady says "Ah okay."
Today he walks in with a big grin on his face. HR lady fucking hired this guy. I can see his monitors from my desk and he spent his whole first day looking at a soccer website on his second monitor. I call up HR, "Why would you even ask me to interview him if you refuse to listen to my feedback?". Lady tells me "You need to be open minded about diversity. Probably most of the things you observed were either cultural differences or language barrier." I tell her definitely not. He lied to me multiple times, and he took credit for other people's work." She tells me that they will keep an eye on me because I'm not being open to diversity.
Are you kidding me? This white lady is literally stereotyping me as a racist because I'm white.
So this fucking HR lady called me a racist because she decided to hire someone that we shouldn't trust. Then she put this asshat on my project. Now I have to be cautious about my position because HR is "watching" my racist ass. Even though I am literally the only one on the development team that is white and speaks English as my first-language. I called a team meeting before the on-boarding is over so I can tell the other developers what is happening. We restructured our code review process so that I will never give him feedback. Then when the time comes that he slips up the "diverse" developers will kick him out so I won't be reprimanded as a "racist".
This company that I work for is a special kind of stupid.34
Another day, another hit piece against gaming.
So, a 15-year old boy hanged himself and the media goes all „This was caused by this game“, even though NO FUCKING TRACES OF THE GAME WERE FOUND ON THE LAPTOP OF THE DECEASED!!!
And then of course my freaking parents go all lecturing me about how the internet twists the brain into not being adequate towards reality etc.
First off, CAN THE FUCKING COLLECTION OF COCKSUCKERS that is the fucking media just fucking get a grip on reality? It was literally said in the same sentence that the supposed game that caused that was not found in any form on the person's laptop. You would think an online game that you take months to play through would need at least some fucking download to run, right? Unless it was a freaking video chat bullshit that they call a „game“ just for the fucking spite of gamers.
Second, HOW FUCKING LONG WILL IT FUCKING TAKE FOR PEOPLE TO FUCKING ACCEPT THAT IT'S NOT THE TECH THAT MAKES PEOPLE KILL THEMSELVES? How hard is it to fucking understand?
Third... How do people in their 60s freaking think they understand anything about modern gaming when they have no freaking way of interacting with it other than these hit pieces? They certainly give more fucks about what a hired bitch of a lying „journalist“, that cannot even talk properly, says. Oh, they care so much about the children. Have they never thought that people are killing themselves exactly because they feel nobody cares about them?
Fourth. How fucking long do parents like mine deny the reality that just as long as they see me as an incomplete copy of my sisters I will be suicidal? Let me guess... It's video games causing me to be oh, so inadequate when I've not played any of them for quite some time...
Fifth... How am I out of touch with reality when these people have never known how I „work“, so to speak, as a person, and they've been the ones basically dictating all my life? Let me see why I'm unhappy...
I know I complain a lot. Sorry for that. But I just cannot stand people like them. People that lie all the time and project that on you while depriving you of any means of defending yourself in a debate...44
So, recently, a person in the US was arrested for stalking people.
The evidence was some data from google, a work computer and from a VPN provider.
Guess from what VPN provider the FBI got those logs? Yes, PureVPN!
Althouh I'm happy they got this creep off the street, it still means that PureVPN has been lying to its entire customer base.
I personally hope that their reputation will be destroyed now because this should never happen.
Keep your eyes open when choosing a VPN provider!62
After listening to two of our senior devs play ping pong with a new member of our team for TWO DAYS!
DevA: "Try this.."
Junior: "Didn't work"
DevB: "Try that .."
Junior: "Still not working"
Me:"What is the problem?"
Few ums...uhs..awkward seconds of silence
Junior: "App is really slow. Takes several seconds to launch and searching either crashes or takes a really long time."
DevA: "We've isolated the issue with Entity Framework. That application was written back when we used VS2010. Since that application isn't used very often, no one has had to update it since."
DevB: "Weird part is the app takes up over 3 gigs of ram. Its obviously a caching issue. We might have to open up a ticket with Microsoft."
Me: "Or remove EF and use ADO."
DevB: "That would be way too much work. The app is supposed to be fully deprecated and replaced this year."
Me: "Three of you for the past two days seems like a lot of work. If EF is the problem, you remove EF."
DevA: "The solution is way too complicated for that. There are 5 projects and 3 of those have circular dependencies. Its a mess."
DevB: "No fracking kidding...if it were written correctly the first time. There aren't even any fracking tests."
Me:"Pretty sure there are only two tables involved, maybe 3 stored procedures. A simple CRUD app like this should be fairly straight forward."
DevB: "Can't re-write the application, company won't allow it. A redesign of this magnitute could take months. If we can't fix the LINQ query, we'll going to have the DBAs change the structures to make the application faster. I don't see any other way."
Holy frack...he didn't just say that.
Over my lunch hour, I strip down the WPF application to the basics (too much to write about, but the included projects only had one or two files), and created an integration test for refactoring the data access to use ADO. After all the tests and EF removed, the app starts up instantly and searches are also instant. Didn't click through all the UI, but the basics worked.
Sat with Junior, pointed out my changes (the 'why' behind the 'what') ...and he how he could write unit tests around the ViewModel behavior in the UI (and making any changes to the data access as needed).
Junior: "Employee app is fixed. Had some help removing Entity Framework and how it starts up fast and and searches are instant. Going to write unit tests today to verify the UI behaivor. I'll be able to deploy the application tomorrow."
DevA: "What?! No way! You did all that yesterday?"
Me: "I removed the Entity Framework over my lunch hour. Like I said, its basic CRUD and mostly in stored procedures. All the data points are covered by integration tests, but didn't have time for the unit tests. It's likely I broke some UI behavior, but the unit tests should catch those."
DevB: "I was going to do that today. I knew taking out Entity Framework wouldn't be a big deal."
Holy fracking frack. You fracking lying SOB. Deeeep breath...ahhh...thanks devRant. Flame thrower event diverted.13
Boss: "it's not the same font"
Me: "yes, it is"
Boss: "don't argue with me. It's a different font"
Me: "ok it's a different font" (it's not)
Boss: "change it please"
15 minutes later and I've done nothing at all to it. Boss comes back.
Boss: "see? I knew it was a different font. This looks perfect now. Why were you lying to me before? I don't like you arguing with me"11
I'm In Canada. A woke HR lady hires an African guy despite him plagiarizing code and lying through an interview. First day he surfs soccer websites so I confront it and HR lady basically calls me a racist and to watch my back.
A second African new-hire comes into the office today and he seems quite capable in an area of specialization for our team. So I ask if we can have him on our team because he has skills. The exec decides to look at the costing for him and goes, "HOLY SHIT WHY ARE WE PAYING ANYONE THAT MUCH?" She looks at the résumé of the new guy and finds out that he is only at intermediate level in his specialization. So I say, "It could be worse. The other guy flat out lied through his interview and he got hired anyway." I forward the emails where I recommended against hiring the other guy and why.
My exec, who is a company stakeholder, opens the pricing list for recent hires. It is obvious that if you are not not white you get paid way above market value for your skill level. Exec is pissed off on a level I never knew was possible.
We make a call from the board room only to find out that the head of HR (also an executive) is driving this. My exec tells me to give her the room. The yelling was so loud everyone could hear what was said from outside the boardroom. At one point the HR lady says, "Just because we could get them cheaper doesn't mean that we should… We pay that much because it is 'the right thing to do'." My executive goes completely silent for a few seconds then in a super aggressive way says.
"…I am going to have your FUCKING head for this. Then I will make sure that you NEVER get a job in HR again for the rest of my natural life. ONLY ONE of us will survive this. YOU are the one pissing away profit. So get ready because I'm going to drown you and your team like a bag full of unwanted puppies." Then she hung up the Polycom. She came out about a minute later and kicked the office manager out of his office and sat there all day making calls and sending emails.
TL;DR: Got a really horrible supervisor temporarily fired, maybe permanently fired, got a laptop, and realized that senior devs are amazing when they stand up for the little guys
Omg... I love my coworkers!!! So like, I'm an incredibly shy dev, like, I only managed to get my internship purely because of my familiarity with c#, Android/UWP app development (although never apple, which you can read about in my last rant lol), and the API Management framework that they were using, so, long stories short, I'm insanely shy and I get anxious quite quickly in social situations, that'll be important in a bit. Anyways, so, in my previous rant (my first one actually, it was "that" bad...) I had a run-in with a rather unfair supervisor situation where he expected me to work on an iOS app without a Mac machine.
So, this is currently a little bit before my shift end, where I'm anxiously trying to get a MacOS VM up and running to be able to copy paste some psudo-code so as not to get in trouble, which is when the senior dev of the team walks by and sees me tearing hair out of my head and being really sad. So what does this god amongst men do?
He comes over and asks me what I'm doing.
Now, I didn't actually notice him, so when he asked me, I was insanely jumpy and scared that my supervisor would appear and be mad at me for not having things done, so I kind of half scream half yelp when he says something, so now he knows somethings up and he acts kind of like I'm an injured deer and slowly asks what's going on.
So, of course I tell him everything that had happened and how the supervisor got really mad about me not being able to develop iOS apps due to not having a Mac, and his expectation of me to get it magically working and getting to work on my module, and the selenium portal automatization, and after a couple seconds of me rapid fire nervous squirrel-like explanation, he holds up a hand and says "He what?!!!!? God dammit, how the hell are you supposed to do that? Jesus, you were supposed to get a company laptop when you got here, where's that??? And if you don't have that then how the hell were you working on the cross platform portion? You need a Mac machine for that, so let me get this straight... You've been frantically trying to find a workaround so that AS (let's call him AS for asshat supervisor (missing an s)) doesn't get mad at you... Who the hell... And this fuckers in charge of the interns??"
He was incredibly pissed off at this point, like, REALLY pissed off... But-
This man had just spoken miracles to me.
So I do what any self respecting intern would do, I start cry laughing and hug said BSD for a quick second (badass senior developer), and I say yep, pretty much ;-;.
And queue AS walking into my workspace and saying
AS- "are you done with the iOS a..."
BSD- "You've got to be kidding me, shut up for a second and sit down"
AS- "?" *Sits*
Me- *hides in corner and cinches up hoodie*
BSD- "Excuse me, but what did you ask benlion to do?"
AS- "Um, I simply told him to start working on the Xamarin app"
BSD- "Yes, but according to benlion, you angrily told him to start working on the Mac portion... Let me ask you something first, why would you do that? It's rude and inappropriate to be hostile to anyone at the workplace, in fact, if he wants to pursue to matter, you can get demoted, actually, if he wants to pursue it, you're fired, and there's no way I'm letting you get a management job again"
AS -"Wow, did benlion really say that? He's obviously lying due to his dislike for me, BSD, it's rather unfair to take his word over his superv..."
BSD-"Oh you did NOT just go there. That's it, stay here. And benlion, come with me." *Points at me*
Me- *Terrified out of my mind, almost to the point of a nervous breakdown because of the argument that I had started* "O-okay o_O"
Long stories short, we come back with his supervisor and he is now relieved of his duties temporarily while this whole thing gets settled...
Oh, and I get my Apple Laptop tomorrow ^-^ so I'm really happy, albeit kind of sad that its my fault that AS doesn't have a job right now ;-;, but he did yell at me and expect incredibly impossible things of me, so, not as bad as I might feel.25
Not writing unit tests.
Everyone reading this is guilty of it.
Anyone who says otherwise is lying.23
So at school the teacher gave us a MONTH to write a sorting algorithm in Java. I asked the teacher if that wasn't a little too much time.
Her answer:" I want to give the weaker people in class a chance."
Okay so far so good.
The day we had to turn in our code I asked around what algorithm others had choosen and if they had any problems with it.
Classmate A: "yeah we didn't know how to program it so we copied it from the internet and I modified it heavily."
Me *raised eyebrows*: "can you show me?"
Me: "but that's exactly the same like the first Google result?!"
A:"No look there , I added this line so that it works with my code"
That lying bitch just added bucketSort(myArr, maxVal);
In the main method.
Me"How is that heavily modifying?"
A:"Also I asked the teacher and she said it was OK to copy the method from the internet"
What the flying cunt is wrong with people. So you give us a month to copy and paste from the internet.
Yeah great teaching.
You are the reason why half the class can't program shit.
Thanks for nothing. 😒😒
First rant hope you enjoyed it.12
So i've been a dev manager for a little while now. Thought i'd take some time to disambiguate some job titles to let everyone know what they might be in for when joining / moving around a big org.
Title: Senior Software Engineer
- Typically has years experience building what management are trying to build
- Building new features
- Writing code
- Code review
- Offering advice to product manag......OH NO YOU DON'T CODE MONKEY, BACK TO WORK!
Title: Dev Manager
- Former/current programmer
- knows his/her way around a codebase.
- Recruiting / interviewing new staff
- Keeping the team focused and delivering tasks
- Architecture decisions
- Lying about complexity of architecture decisions to ensure team gets the actual time they need
- Lying about feature estimations to ensure team gets to work on critical technical improvements that were cancelled / de-prioritised
- Explaining to hire-ups why we can't "Just do it quicker"
- Explaining to senior engineers why the product manager declined their meeting request
Title: Product / Product Manager
- Nothing relevant to the industry or product line what so ever
- Found the correct building on the day of the interview
- Has once opened an Excel spreadsheet and successfully saved it to a desktop
- Making every key decision about every feature available in the app
- Learning to ignore that inner voice we like to call "Common sense"
- Making sure to not accidentally take some advice from technical staff
- Raising the blood pressure of everyone below them / working with them
Title: Program Lead / Product Owner
- Capable of speech
- Aware of what a computer is (optional)
- Sitting down
- Clicking random buttons on Jira
- Making bullet point lists
Title: Director of Software Engineering
- Allegedly attended college/university to study computer science
- Similar to a technical product manager (technical optional)
- Reports directly to VP
- Fixes problems by creating a different problem somewhere else as a distraction
- Claiming to understand and green light technical decisions, while having already agreed with product that it will never happen9
People in my office sing me praises for what I can do with Linux even though I joke with them that “I have no idea how to do that - but give me half an hour and an internet connection and I’ll figure something out for you.” I even once specifically said in response to my boss commenting on my skills, “You do realize that I just like…google stuff when you ask me to do something with Linux that I don’t know how to do, right?”
But his praise didn’t change at all. There was no “Wait, that’s all it is?”
Instead, he said “Yes, but the fact that you think to do that - and that you know exactly how to phrase your searches and how to sift through the results to get the right answer, and you then integrate what you’ve learned and use it going forward - is still so much more than any of the rest of us can do. To you, it’s “just googling stuff,” but it’s still a unique and valuable skill you bring, so don’t shrug off the compliments so cavalierly, okay?“
And this was coming from an executive with an MBA. Don’t undervalue your googling skills, kids. It’s not lying if you know you can figure it out.10
A client called today because their email wasn't arriving at the receipants inbox but bouncing back with a 'poor MTA rating' error.
Checked about every blacklist I know and our server was definitely not blacklisted. Must be the receipants host which for some reason was blacklisting his specific email address.
Told the client that it wasn't a problem on our side and that he had to request a whitelist himself (we'd do it but it wasn't a specific server problem so we're not going to spend time on that).
Fair enough, he'd do that.
Calls back. "Well, the other party says that your server definitely has a poor rating, it's on your side!!"
Alright, this is getting annoying. Gave him a few blacklist checking sites links and told him to run his domain AND our server IP through it. Indeed came back completely clean.
"But the other party said it's poor rating on your side so I'd think tha........"
YEAH WHY DON'T YOU SHOVE THAT OTHER PARTY UP YOUR FUCKING ASS. I'VE SHOWN YOU PROOF THAT IT'S DEFINITELY NOT ON OUR FUCKING SIDE, EXPLAINED IT TO YOU AND SO ON. MAYBE, FOR ONE FUCKING SECOND, TAKE INTO CONSIDERATION THAT THE OTHER PARTY IS FUCKING LYING?!?!?
That was my productivity falling out a window. I just found a shit load of bubble wrap lying around!
Safe to say, productivity efficiently ruined.19
My guide to know if your startup is failing:
My Qualifications: Every startup I've joined has failed. Not necessarily because of me.
For the sake of me typing faster, x=startup.
1) X doesn't have a product, but just an idea that x keeps pitching as the next "big thing". (What's with this shit anyway?)
2)X keeps changing products, One day your designing IoT sex toys and the next day your building a self aware AI. For some reason, the people at X saw Silicon Valley or that meme about how Instagram was created and thought "Fuck that happens to every moron who can switch on a computer."
3) Even worse, X keeps changing industries.
4) X keeps lying to you, your marginal user base and seems overall unethical. (You should leave at this point.)
5) X wants to target some obscure and very specific market and keeps pitching the company along the following lines
<famous_company> for <random_market>
Eg: "Yo bro it's like Amazon but for necrophiles."
6)X keeps saying that X is the next big thing. (X is not and I can't emphasize this point enough.)
What you should realize is this is my general observation and some or all of these points may not apply to every situation.
Sorry for typos and any other stuff.11
This customer comes in and practically throws a computer on the counter.
Customer: This computer isn't working. I've ran the diagnostics and it says it's software. *places a dvd case with a 32 bit Windows 7 disk in it on the counter* It had Windows 10 on it, but I want Windows 7 on it.
Me: Well, you may have issues with the drivers if you put Windows 7 on it--
Customer: I don't care, I just want Windows 7.
Me: You SHOULD care. That means no wifi, no display, no mouse... Windows 7 doesn't like Windows 10 hardware.
Customer: Then... check to see Windows 7 compatibility!
Me: Alright.... *makes notes to check for Windows 7 compatibility*
Me: So has this Windows 7 been used before?
Customer: Yes, it has.
Me: On how many computers?
Customer: I've installed it on two computers and it works just fine.
Me: That's weird because Windows license keys are for one computer only. Are both of them connected to the internet?
Me: Well, okay then... *finishes up ticket*
Customer: I work in this field and I just don't understand why they don't come with the disks anymore. How much is a Windows 10 disk?
Me: *gives price*
Customer: And do you have any?
Me: Let me check *I go to where they are, find some and come back out*
Me: Unfortunately we're out at the moment and would have to special order some back in.
Customer: OK. So then how much to fix this computer?
Me: *price of installing Windows and backing up data*
Customer: That's halfway to the price of a new one of these!
Me: Well yes, an HP at Walmart... But you do have that option if you want to take it.
Customer: Well, why does it cost that much?
Me: Well, it's $labor1 to install Windows, $labor2 to do some basic setup and drivers, and $labor3 to backup and restore data.
Customer: Oh, well I don't want data.
Me: Okay, well then it would be $total - $labor3
Customer: ...Okay, fine
Me: *updates the ticket*
When she finally left I put it on the bench and the first message said "SMART ERROR." I then did 4 different tests that said "lol, the hard drive is failing."
If you "worked in this field," you would know that a SMART error is hard drive related.
If you worked in this field, you would know that Windows is only a 1PC license, so why are you lying about installing it with no issues on other computers?
If you worked in this field, you would know you would want a 64bit Windows on your computer.
If you worked in this field, you would know how to find a Windows 10 installation media online.
If you worked in this field, you would know that HPs are not good computers to get.
IF YOU FUCKING WORKED IN THIS FIELD YOU WOULDN'T BE SUCH A FUCKING CUNT.17
Excuse the profuse amount of profanity below.
Fuck this fucking fucked up motherfucker of a fucking director. Money does not make you a fucking decent person, and you come in here and tell me that you pay my fucking measly salary so I must be fucking grateful.
Starts off with a boardroom meeting this morning. Wireless connection on my laptop takes two minutes to connect, I get told that I am wasting company time and that the salary of everyone in the meeting is quite a lot ("with me being the highest"- cuntface director) so stop wasting time. Fuck you man, it's a fucking wireless connection. I am building your motherfucking company applications and doing web design and for what, so I can earn fuckall and be told that I am fucking wasting time. I am presenting your fucking site you wanted, so give me a fucking minute extra to start up the fucking wireless connection.
The fucking mails are taking long to send, great, let's come down and fucking scream at the dev who regrettably said he would try and assist IT (by calling the provider). I literally just got told that I am the following. 1) Fucking stupid 2) He is going to close the dept down because I apparently fuck up (yet again cuntface, your fucking mailserver is NOT MY FUCKING PROBLEM) 3) He is going to contact an external company to come and check my work. 4) I am fucking useless. 5) I telling him lies (yeah fuckface, I worked as a sys admin, I know what a motherfucking DNS server is and what it does. you don't - so don't fucking tell me that I am lying when I tell you there is a DNS fucking issue, because you don't know what the fuck you are talking about - to top that off motherfucker, I FUCKING BUILT YOUR FUCKING SERVER AND YOUR FUCKING NETWORK. I FUCKING KNOW HOW IT WORKS AND WHAT THE FUCK I AM TALKING ABOUT).
On top of that, I got pushed out of the way of my own PC, my code got some fucked up gibberish in it (because he was trying to minimise my editor and he typed some in it, and now I have to fucking roll-back. He told me I am wasting company time and he will take my shit away from me if I download something again. It is an open network. I downloaded JAVA and fucking updated Sublime. Jesus man. What the fucking fuck.
"why is your gmail open?!?!" because I was testing your emails from an external network. "DON'T FEED ME BULLSHIT" (even though the top mail states "test"). It's the whole fucking "my money determines my dick size" mentality.
That being said, I got told that I need to work overtime, without pay, to resolve IT's issue, even if I have to on the weekend.
That being said,my new Dell that I had just bought (my own) got thrown on the floor and he fucked out of my office. Stupid motherfucker. I fucking earn nothing but cannot leave. I will find another job, and when I do - you can go and fuck yourself and your fucking degrading opinions. I am not fucking stupid, so fuck you.Fuck your company and fuck you. Cunt.34
So I own a webshop together with a guy I met at one of my previous contract jobs. He said he had a great idea to sell product X because he can get them very cheap from another European country. Actually it is a great idea so we decided to work together on this: I do everything tech related, he does the non tech stuff.
Now we are more than 1 year in business. I setup a VPS, completely configured it, installed and setup the complete webshop, built 2 custom PrestaShop modules, built many customizations, built a completely new order proces (both front and back end), advertised quite some products, did some link building, ensured everything is in place to do proper SEO, wrote some content pages, did administration and tax declarations, rewrote a part of a PrestaShop component because it was so damn inefficient and horribly slow, and then some more. Much more.
He did customer relation management, supplier management and some ad words campaigns. Promised me many times to write the content for our product pages. This guy has an education in marketing but literally said: I'm not gonna invest in creating some marketing plan. I have no ambition in online marketing.
What?! You have the marketing knowledge and skills but refuse to use it to market our webshop and business? What the fuck is wrong with you?!
Today he says to me: 'Hey man, this is becoming an expensive hobby as we don't sell much and have lots of costs. I don't understand why I should be the one to write these content pages. Everything you did in the past 8 months can be done in less than 20 hours! You are a joke and just made it a big deal by spreading your work over so many months. I know for sure because I currently work at a company where I'm surrounded by front end devs! Are you fucking crazy?! You're a liar.'
He talks like this to me every 2 months or so while he can't even deliver the content for 1 single product in 6 fuckin' months! We even had to refund a few of our customers because Mr. client relations manager didn't respond to their e-mails within 1 fucking week!! So I asked him how could that have happened as you do the client relations and support. Well, he replied to me: 'Why didn't YOU respond to our clients? You don't log on in our back office at least once a day?!'.
Of course I do asshole. But YOU don't. He replied that I was lying just like I was lying about what I did for our business.
So, asshole, let's have a look at PrestaShops logs to see who's logging in daily. Well, you can probably guess who's IP was there in most of the entries. It wasn't his.
So, what the fuck have you been doing then?! You can't even manage to respond quickly to a client?!! We have maybe 50 clients and if we get 1 question a month by email it is already a lot. But you keep bitching, complaining and insulting me instead?!!!
Last time he literally admitted on a WhatsApp conversation that he had and still has the hope that he could just sit back and relax and watch me do ALL the work.
Well, guess what you fucking moron. That's not what we agreed upon. You fuckin' retard think you're so smart but you say EVERYTHING on WhatsApp! Including your promises to me. Thank you you fuckin' piece of dog shit because now I have hard evidence and will hand it over to my lawyer to make you pay every god damn cent for all the hours I've spent working on our business. Oh, and I'll take over the webshop and make it a success on my own because I know damn well how to get relevant traffic and thus customers.
You just go get yourself fucked in the ass without lubricant you fuckin' asshole. I have told you you shouldn't fuck with me because I take business very seriously. I even warned you when you were crossing a line again. Well, if you don't listen... You will pay for the consequences. I will be so damn happy to tell you 'I told you so' with a very very big smile on my face. That momemt WILL come, 'partner'.
Fuck you. You will be fucked. Count on that. Fucking asshole.8
Used to work for a company that used asterisk for telecommunications.
Boss asked me to quickly change the call charge costs effective immediately. Finished 3diting. Went to piss. Some douche from sales came and pressed asdffggkl into the code, went down 50 lines and left it there.
Got back. Saved the code, pushed through live without testing.
Get a call three minutes later asking what the fuck did I do. There were already 450 call tickets from clients moaning they couldnt call.
So I went and checked the file I pushed. Tested it. What. Line 460 asdffggkl? What the fuck.
Removed it and boom it worked.
Got called in and said I cost the company four times my salary. Said it wasn't me, I wouldn't make a mistake like that. Told him that it was my fuck up for leaving my pc open, and that it probably was best to lock the screen.
Said I'm lying. Pulled the fucking camera footage and there was the fucker changing my code.
I got pardoned, he got a warning (just a warning). For 15 Min, I thought my ass was fired.
Will never make that naive mistake again.14
Do you also hate that feel when you have to deal with 110% idiot? Today, BTC hit 5000$ mark, right now it was 5200$. Media are now full of BTC. Me with my friend, having lunch.
Me: Wow, BTC is finnaly over 5k$.
Friend: Wow, I will just wait till it gets to 5500$ and then buy so I can sell it for kore when price drops.
Me: *trying to explain that if you want to profit you need to buy when its cheap and sell when its expensive*
Friend: No you are lying thats bullshit *ragequit*
It really hurts since he is really smart, especially good in math and logical thinking... 🙄15
Less recruiter and more recruiting company.
Specifially: Robert Half.
Robert Half is scammy as hell, and they 'fired' me for quitting when my girlfriend got raped. Really.
Robert Half took half of my paychecks for the entire duration of my contracts with them. I didn't know right away because, as a policy, they hide how much the hiring company is paying for you, and they also forbid the company from telling you. (The company pays RHI, RHI pays you). Makes sense why they hide it because it certainly pissed me off.
Long story short, I worked for a php dev shop through them (after telling them to lower their fees or i'd walk), worked there for awhile (while remote moonlighting because why not!), and quit. I quit because my girlfriend at the time had just gotten raped, and with the emotionall fallout from that, there was no way I could focus on two jobs and be there for her. My boss understood and let me leave, though it put him in a bind.
The next day, I got a call from the regional manager of Robert Half. He was a total tool. He demanded to know if I quit, didn't care why I quit, proceeded to "educate" me in the finer points of why that was unprofessional and why i'm unemployable, accused me of lying about idr what, and finally switched into legalese to say "I regret to inform you that you can no longer consider Robert Half as a means of employment." (or something along those lines) and hung up on me. Asshole. I hope various large someones rape him so he has an inkling what it's like to be objectified and thrown away like trash.
Guy was an asshole; probably still is.
RHI was awful and scammy; probably still is, too.
Wasn't really a fan of the job either.
So at the end of it, I wasn't out anything but some patience and serenity (a lot of serenity). I kept the first (remote) job, was there for my girlfriend, and helped her through everything.
But yeah, Robert Half?
They can fucking go to hell.25
Just reduced 900 lines of horrible code into 106 lines of less horrible code..
QA: do those 106loc really do what the 900loc did ?
QA: are you sure?
Me: NO. I was lying. Maybe it does. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe you should run it and find out.
QA: *immediately releases for prod*3
Saw my uncle using Microsoft Edge today.
Me: Uncle, you should use Chrome or Firefox. They are better.
Uncle: Windows 10 showed a pop up few days back that chrome drains battery faster. So I uninstalled chrome.
Me: But Windows is fooling you to use its product. Edge is horrible and useless.
Uncle: So you think you are smarter than Windows people? Are they idiots who designed this whole software?
Microsoft u got 1 more Edge user. Enjoy, you lying and misleading company.28
Stumbled upon this old gold on reddit. If I tell you that my monitor is now not covered in accidentally spat out espresso, I'd be lying. 😂😂😂2
Random Person: *looks at my screen as I’m writing a short pointless script* Oh! Are you coding?
R: Oh! I code as well!
M: Cool, what languages do you know?
R: Uh, English?
I love it when lying, cheating, bitching dinosaurs act like they're all powerful and on God mode just because they can click buttons in a mobile app and do whatever the fuck they want. You know the system logs your shit, do you? I guess not.
I booked a car using a mobile app that I've been using for years. They absorbed their competition so currently, they are the only car booking app here. When I saw that my driver arrived at the pick-up location, I looked around and found that he wasn't there so I asked him where he is. He did not respond so I walked around the pick-up location and said, "I'm right outside <insert building name here>."
To my surprise, the mobile app said he has already picked me up. I kept messaging him asking what happened and why he picked me up in the app when I'm still waiting for him in the location. No response. I called him thinking it was just a misunderstanding and politely asked what happened. He was angry and said, "Why weren't you in the pick-up location?" I said I was there and couldn't find him. Thinking there must have been a mistake, I asked "Can you cancel my booking? I can't cancel from my side because it says I'm already in your car." He yelled, "Well, I can't do anything about that. I picked you up anyway and if I cancel now, it would reflect badly on my record."
I dropped the call. Now I'm stuck in my location because I can't use the app to book another car until this motherfucker "drops me off" when I wasn't even in his car to be dropped off anyway. I'm late for my appointment and had to chase down some taxis when most of them are occupied due to the rush hour. A few minutes later, I received a notification that I was "dropped off" and my credit was charged for the "trip".
I was furious and I swear to fucking Satan, I'm gonna destroy this man's career. This guy is on a power trip. First, his car just zoomed by the pick-up location. He did not consume the given 3 minutes wait, not like he would consume it anyway since I was fucking there waiting for him. I hate it when people are late so I also avoid making people wait. Second, he didn't have to pick me up at all. He could have just cancelled or let me cancel. And finally, he gave me that fucking attitude when I called him like IT JUST MADE SENSE that he picked me up anyway. Now I'm hassled and he gets paid for it.
What he said kept ringing in my ear:
"I don't want to get a bad record."
"I don't want to get a bad record."
"I don't want to get a bad record."
So I emailed the company and told them what happened. I explicitly said that not only do I want a refund, something has to be done with this driver given the details above. How's that for not having a bad record? I swear, the fucking rotting old corpses in this country act like they own the place just because they existed before Jesus was born. And these motherfucking drivers, the chariots from hell, they just abuse their passengers like they're some almighty god who can do as they wish because well, you don't have much "choice", do you? I have the choice to hand your ass back to you, sir.
This is why you're all fucking poor. You get a small taste of presumed "power", you act like little shits. This is why I have no sympathy for the poor in this fucking place. You're all lazy fucks who hassle everyone just because you feel entitled to do it. Because everything is unfair, right? You're not given opportunities, right? And yet given an opportunity, you do this kind of shit and assume everyone else is too dumb to prove what you did because you went clickity-clickity-click on an app you think you know everything about.
Fuck you. Fuck you. May god have mercy on you and I hope my rage blows over soon enough before I do some crazy shit as to stalk your next fucking location and keep spamming you with bad reports using different accounts until you lose the fucking job that you don't even care for. It's not that hard for a raging lunatic like me. God damn, I hate liars and cheaters. An eye for an eye, motherfucker.
"Now you're acting the same way and all powerful just because you can report them."
"It's ironic how you--"
Yeah, yeah, nice observation, genius. Stop spreading your mediocre "findings" on someone else's rant. It doesn't make you look smart, it makes you look desperate.
"Oh yeah, oh yeah? Well, stop spreading your mediocre rants in this plat--"
Shut the fuck up, oh my gggggggggggggggoddd. Just let me fucking rant.10
My dream is to build a shopping cart for web stores that doesn't fucking suck.
Seriously Bigcommerce, Shopify, Magneto, etc. All of you can eat bag of dicks and burn in hell for ever.
I don't care what languages you fancy, all of their stacks are a pile of shit, monkey patched together with popsicle sticks and duct tape and it all falls apart with high concurrency.
All their greasy haired sales teams will throw all manners of horse shit at the poor bastards who are trying to run a business so they can pad their commission checks... "High availability", "scalable", "reliable", "Increased conversation rate"... Lying dick fucks, all of them! I am calling them the fuck out on that snake oil they're all peddling.
The only thing worse than their shit APIs is the shit documentation and the shit support that accompanies them.
Support of these platforms are pretty much all the same, sure mayhaps one has 24*7 phone support and another closes at 9 or some shit like that, either way the only people they put on the phone are monkeys that will freeze up and say "I'm not a developer so I can't help you"... Guess what, "Eric"! I didn't ask if you're a fucking dev! I'm calling because one of your devs fucked up and I need you to tell him to unfuck it so I can get the fuck on with my day!
Their app/plugin market places are shameful to say the least. The overall quality of software is somewhat dire and it's mostly dominated by oversees developers who speak English about as well as the language they're developing with (not very well usually).
I could go on until I hit the character limit but I'm gonna end it here by saying, all shopping carts suck and they should burn for eternity in the depths of hell so that a savior can free all developers from this agonizing torment.9
Roommate's boyfriend visits just to work because his laptop can't connect via WiFi anymore.
Described the problem and fix attempts yesterday, he got two other tech savvy people involved, now suspects hardware problem.
I needed <1m to re-activate the WiFi adapter, now I'm seen as the local tech God as I deserve.3
Guess what my supervisor had lying around the house and gave me? (from an old company project) My desk is gonna shine bright like a diamond. Yes, it's RGB.4
The Raspberry Pi is the most fun toy I've bought in ages. And this is coming from a guy who has 700+ games in his steam library, with dozens of midi equipment lying around.7
My mom had forgotten her cellphone with me, and of course it rang. So I answered to be greeted by a "Microsoft" support employee. *thinking, this is gonna be good*
- Bla bla bla there is a virus on your computer which I am calling to assist you in removing.
- Oh? Great! But it's running Ubuntu! (my moms windows drive crashed some weeks ago, so I installed Ubuntu on replacement instead)
- Oh you think you're so smart with Ubuntu and your bullshit! You are lying.
- Oh, yeah I do love lying!
- You are a liar! You should be ashamed of yourself!
I didn't get to give him a piece of my mind before he hung up....
So today I got called a liar by a scammer... Not sure if I should be happy or disappointed in myself 🤔😂3
Some Romanian "Hacker" is trying to hack my forum xD
He tried to call the setup script for PhpMyAdmin, but I don't even have PhpMyAdmin installed because I use MongoDB xDDD
I'm lying on the floor laughing6
(I wrote most of this as a comment in reply about Microsoft buying GitHub on another rant but decided to move it here because it is rant worthy. Also, no, I'm not a Microsoft employee nor do I have any Microsoft stock).
Microsoft buying GitHub makes sense. They contribute more to the open source community on GitHub than any other company. (Side note, they also contribute/have contributed to the Linux Kernel).
Steve Ballmer isn't running the show anymore. Because of that, we have awesome things like:
* Visual Studio Code - Completely free and powerful light weight IDE for coding in just about any script or language. This IDE is also open source, hosted on GitHub. It can be installed on Win/Mac/Linux.
* Visual Studio Community Edition: fully featured flagship IDE free for solo developers and students, can be installed on Win/Mac.
* Fully featured Sql Server running in a Docker container.
* .Net Core, which can be compiled to native binaries of Windows, MacOS AND Linux. You can't even do that with Java, you have to first have the JVM installed in order to run any kind of Java code on any of those operating systems. .Net Core is also an absolutely beautiful framework with so many features at your disposal.
Yes, they've done bonehead things in the past but who/which company hasn't. Yes, they have Cortana. Yes, they force Bing on you when searching with Cortana (does anyone actually regularly use Cortana? Or Bing?). Yes, their operating system costs money. Yes, their malware-style Upgrade-to-Windows-10 tactics were evil and they admitted such. Yes, they brought ads and other unfortunate things to Skype. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't concerned about that Skype bit translating over into GitHub. BUT, the fact that so many of their employees use GitHub daily means they are dogfooding the platform, which is a positive thing.
Despite the flaws, from the perspective of a software engineer they really should be given a lot of credit for all these new directions they are moving in now. They directly aim to help and contribute to the developer community. Plus, Windows 10 is finally getting a dark theme! haha.
I think Microsoft buying GitHub makes a lot of sense. Of course do what you want about it, feel how you want about it, but casting the same ol' shade at them for anything they do seems a bit like automatic reflex more than anything else.
I'm bracing myself for the impending wave of angry hornets from the nest I just kicked. In all seriousness though, I welcome discussion on the topic even if you feel differently than I do. I'm not saying there's no reason to dislike them, just saying there are lots of new reasons to hate them less and/or appreciate what they are doing now.19
There are things that i wish i didn't see.
Yesterday, i went to a coffee shop to relax and reviewing my works. And suddenly a college friend of mine approach me and we started talking about work.
Me: So, What do you do at work? What's your stack?
Him: Not much of a new. Still working with wordpress, html,css and jquery.
So he started talking about how cool wordpress is and how he generates money doing sites.
Me: Can i see your sample works?
Him: Sure, *opens his shitty windows laptop with Web Tech stickers*. and handover his laptop to me.
Me: Woah. the design is so neat (I'm lying). But it's freaking slow man(REALLY FVCKING SLOW).
* I decided to open the devTools and inspected the source code. And I can't believe what i saw.
- 20+ images with 2~4mb file size
- CDN's of bootstrap, foundation and semantic UI
- LOTS OF FVCKING PLUGINS
* I didn't told him what i saw. I just turn over the laptop to him and finish my coffee.
Him: My sites are cool right? I have a lot of pending projects right now. Easy money Bruh!
Me: Wow. *sips* coffee. and say goodbye to him and walkout.
I FEEL BAD FOR HIS CLIENTS!4
If you are a salesperson, you can just go straight to hell. You're all a bunch of cocksucking twats and I'm amazed you manage to get yourselves dressed each day. You're a no good fucking waste of oxygen and you need to put your fork in a socket the next time you're eating.
I'm working on building a crm and ticket management system for use in the office to handle client passwords. Since I'm building from scratch I wanted to make sure I had properly planned my classes and functions before opening the code editor so I put a message on my door that says "Don't interrupt, thanks" followed by the date so people knew it was a fresh message and not something left from the previous day.
I'm deep in the zone, the psuedo code and logic is flowing, I'm getting classes planned and feeling really productive for an hour or so when suddenly my door flies open and in comes a sales person.
SP: "Hey, do you have any extra phones lying around? Mine's being slow and keeps hanging up on people."
Me: "Do you see the sign on my door right there at eye level which says not to bother me?"
SP: "oh, do you want me to come back later?"
Me: "You've already interrupted me now, let's go see what's going on before I spent an hour setting up a new phone for you." While we are walking across the office I asked him when the last time the phone rebooted.
SP: "idk, Salesperson#2 suggested that as I was headed over here but I figured I'd just ask you."
We get over to his desk and I see he has two phones sitting on his desk. "Where did this one come from?"
SP: "Oh that was on the desk over here but I figured I could use it."
Me: "Well aside from the fact that the phones are assigned to specific people for a reason, you took the time to unhook your phone to set this one up and you didn't think to reboot your phone first. Plug your phone back in."
He plugs the old phone, which is assigned to him, and while booting it does a quick firmware update and boots up fine. He tests a few things and decides it's all better now.
So someone suggested a fix for you and you decided, instead, you would break company IT policy by moving equipment from one station to another without notifying the IT department. You entered a room which had a closed door without knocking, and you disobeyed the sign on the actual door itself which politely requests that you go away. All because you couldn't be bothered to take 2 minutes and reboot your phone, which you had to do anyways.
You completely broke my train of thought and managed to waste 2 hours of effecient workflow because you had an emergency.9
It were around 1997~1998, I was on middle school. It was a technical course, so we had programing languages classes, IT etc.
The IT guy of our computer lab had been replaced and the new one had blocked completely the access on the computers. We had to make everything on floppy disks, because he didn't trusted us to use the local hard disk. Our class asked him to remove some of the restrictions, but he just ignored us. Nobody liked that guy. Not us, not the teachers, not the trainees at the lab.
Someday a friend and me arrived a little bit early at the school. We gone to the lab and another friend that was a trainee on the lab (that is registered here, on DevRant) allowed us to come inside. We had already memorized all the commands. We crawled in the dark lab to the server. Put a ms dos 5.3 boot disk with a program to open ntfs partitions and without turn on the computer monitor, we booted the server.
At that time, Windows stored all passwords in an encrypted file. We knew the exact path and copied the file into the floppy disk.
To avoid any problems with the floppy disk, we asked the director of the school to get out just to get a homework we theorically forgot at our friends house that was on the same block at school. We were not lying at all. He really lived there and he had the best computer of us.
The decrypt program stayed running for one week until it finds the password we did want: the root.
We came back to the lab at the class. Logged in with the root account. We just created another account with a generic name but the same privileges as root. First, we looked for any hidden backup at network and deleted. Second, we were lucky: all the computers of the school were on the same network. If you were the admin, you could connect anywhere. So we connected to a "finance" computer that was really the finances and we could get lists of all the students with debits, who had any discount etc. We copied it to us case we were discovered and had to use anything to bargain.
Now the fun part: we removed the privileges of all accounts that were higher than the trainee accounts. They had no access to hard disks anymore. They had just the students privileges now.
After that, we changed the root password. Neither we knew it. And last, but not least, we changed the students login, giving them trainee privileges.
We just deleted our account with root powers, logged in as student and pretended everything was normal.
End of class, we went home. Next day, the lab was closed. The entire school (that was school, mid school and college at the same place) was frozen. Classes were normal, but nothing more worked. Library, finances, labs, nothing. They had no access anymore.
We celebrated it as it were new years eve. One of our teachers came to us saying congratulations, as he knew it had been us. We answered with a "I don't know what are you talking about". He laughed and gone to his class.
We really have fun remembering this "adventure". :)
PS: the admin formatted all the servers to fix the mess. They had plenty of servers.4
So. I'm trying to use Material Design with Material UI. The components and UI look *great*.
It's from google, though, which really pisses me off. but I like what I can do with the UI.
I really want a grid system for responsiveness. because obviously. besides, i really hate doing all the responsive shit myself. it sucks and i hate it.
Material Design does not include a grid system. okay, it includes a grid component, but it's not for site layout. it's for making a grid of images. or something.
What it does include is a lot of very lengthy documentation on what you should do, complete with fancy graphics saying "THIS IS HOW YOU MUST DO IT OR YOU'RE DOING IT ALL WRONG" -- but they don't actually support it! you must do it all yourself.
Why oh why would they tell you how you must do things if they don't provide the tools to make it possible? fucking google.
You might decide it's a grand idea to interject at this moment and say: "there are plenty of tools out there that allow you to do this!" And sure, you'd be right. however -- and i think this might just barely might be worth mentioning -- THEY REALLY FUCKING SUCK. Hey, let's look at some of the classes! So clear and semantic! This one was nice and simple: "xs4" -- but wtf does that mean? okay, it apparently means 4 columns as they'd appear on an extra-small layout. How does that work on a large layout? Who knows. Now, how about "c12"? okay, maybe 12 columns? but how does that display on a phone with a layout small enough to only have 4 columns? i don't know! they don't know! nobody knows!
oh oh oh oh. and my particular favorite: "mdc-layout-grid__cell mdc-layout-grid__cell--align-bottom" WHAT. THE. FUCK. I'm not writing a goddamn novel! and that one claims to be from google itself. either they've gone insane or someone's totally lying. either way, fuck them.
SO. TERRIBLENESS ASIDE.
Instead of using Material Design v0.fuckoff that lacks any semblance of a grid layout, I figure I'll try v1.0 alpha that actually has one supported natively. It's new and supports everything I need. There's no way this can't be a good idea.
The problem is, while it's out and basically usable, none of the React component libraries fucking work with it. Redux-Form doesn't work with it either because it doesn't understand nested compound controls, and hacking it to work at least triples the boilerplate. So, instead, I have to use some other person's "hey, it's shitty but it works for me" alpha version of someone else's project that works as a wrapper on top of Redux-Form that makes all of this work. yeah, you totally followed that. Kind of like a second-cousin-twice-removed sort of project adding in the necessary features and support all the way down. and ofc it doesn't quite work. because why would things ever be easy?
like seriously, come on.
What i'm trying to do isn't even that bloody hard.
Do I really have to use bootstrap instead?
then again, fuck this significantly more.
Making a contest site for a client. It's 2 parts, a static part and then a "hub" where the contest actually takes part. I did most of the static part, and uploaded it to show her. She likes it, but wants to be able to change the content automatically without having to talk to me. Ok, I think. The harder part is the contest site, so she's not gonna run away with my code. I give her access to the ftp and teach her what to do.
To my amazement she takes a liking to html. And starts adding some (super simple) tags. They ruin some of my designs but they look fine. Whatever.
Today she messages me saying that the top picture is off. Hmm, I'll check it out. Turns out almost the entire page is ruined. What's even worse is that she inserted a link to a facebook image she has on top of everything, a picture I don't have access to, and yet she's refusing to admit that it was her mistake. It's not even wrapped in an img tag, it's just pure text!!!
Fine. I'll revert to the version I had. No! cz apparently I can't undo all the changes she's worked hard on. So now I have to go through all the markup and check what's causing this -- and I hate frontend!!!
Worst part of this all? She can't fucking be bothered to type out what her whore infested lying mouth wants to say. She has to send me voicenotes, a few minutes long, filled with uhhh ummm let me think, because that brain who thought learning to write <br/> and <em> is bad ass can't FUCKING formulate a thought before sending it. She has to have me stop my music, and stop my concentration just so she can tell me maybe she pasted it by mistake IN A 5 MINUTE VOICE NOTE. tbh the money isn't even that good. I don't know why I'm still here.
PS: it's not missing an include. I checked.7
Story time :
Sometime ago I posted a video on YouTube on how to root a particular phone that was lying around at home. I was trying to demonstrate one of those "one-tap root" apps that were plentiful in the market. It so happened that one specific version of Framaroot and one particular method of exploit works for that device. I even verified this by trying different versions and it didn't work. So in the description it was mentioned to use ONLY this version that worked. Few days later there were atleast 5 dislikes and comments that it didn't work on some other version.
That's how I understood how stupid and dumb people can get.7
So im here with this lovely girl on my chest and all i can think of is why i got a Null Pointer exception and why in the fudge im lying here with this woman instead of fixing that.
Oh, maybe its because i spend 27 hours of the available 24 hours in a freakin day writing code whilst struggling to give her attention. She deserves this moment. She's my best Fragment...Friend, she's my best Friend.10
I am a little bit fat (just a little bit :D) and there is no such an avatar in devRant to represent my look. That makes me feel I'm lying about myself 😐2
For any job, you can include in your resume, without a hint of lying, that you are Time magazine person of the year 2006. Seriously.1
It's not a dev quiting but my brother who worked in parcel delivery at that time.
He was hired on a temporary contract but promissed from the beginning and in every discussion they had, that he'll get a permanent position after 6 moth, if his work is good.
Fast forward 6 months. They had a meeting and told him how satisfied they where with his work so naturally he asked about the permanent contract. Fuckers acted suprise and shit. Claiming to never have said any of it. However as they are happy with him and so "generous", they offerd him another contract for 6 months and told him, they could talk about a permanent one after that period.
He kind of has a temprament, so he got up, fliped them the bird and called them lying assholes and went home. He didn't show for the time left on his contract.
The funny thing about it he worked for the swiss postal service (which is owned by the state) but not directly but through this.company providing temporary workers (which is cheaper for them as they get a shitty salary compared to a full time employee with all the benefits).
Nice thing though, the accounting department still sent him a christmas bonus (he quit somewhere around mai...)7
This is my Research Purpose VM, It had been lying around unused for too long.
P.S. I know my specs suck actually3
Client calls at 3AM, telling me an issue he reported which I told him was already solved in a new update hasn't been solved. He tells me that I'm lying because the issue is still there. The son of a bitch didn't even update the flicking app. Sincerely, fuck you.4
Google is getting smarter with their recruiters, if those recruiters are even people at all. I have this recruiter message me once a month and her messages are so targeted and specific.. like.. she ACTUALLY read my profile. She writes a lengthy message that includes my previous company's name, work experience, and even the projects I have on Github (as in specific questions, not just the name of the repository or some shit that can easily be scraped). She mentions events specific to the area where I live in, etc.
She's doing these things that I've been planning to do. Maybe a web crawler and a game of adlib to make people think you actually read about them and cared one bit when in reality, you're just a bot who have access to public information. You just bind them all together and fill in the blanks and then send it away.
Maybe you have a few message templates and use a bit of code to shuffle some words a little bit, make them less perfect and more human. Throw in a few "unintentional" mistakes to make it look more casual, add some warmth to your cold, metallic, robot heart. With all these, you get more variety on the messages you send. Maybe apply some machine learning or some shit, have it listen/read from different people, and give it an illusion of a personality.
But what's this? She did not send the message on an "o'clock" time. It wasn't 12:00 AM at all, or 7:00 PM, or 4:00 PM. The follow-up email was sent on 12:20 AM. Was all the messages queued and the job runs at 12:00 AM but she's sent it to so many that it reached me 20 minutes later? Nah. Or maybe this is intentional, some low-key "I'm not a bot, I don't operate at exactly 12:00 AM. I don't have a cron, I have a heart." But if I were to make one, I would send it at times like 9:34 AM, a little less suspicious. I want to see if there's a pattern on what time she sends these things but I only see the date on the previous messages now because I didn't care enough to read it before.
Also, this is LinkedIn, they give scrapers a hard time but then again, this is Google and they have the money to pay for abuse. Now I want to check our time difference. What time did she actually send this and was it really rainy in Ireland that time OR ARE YOU LYING TO ME, CLAUDIA? I thought you cared about me? Was it all a fucking lie? Do you know me at all? Or was it all just a clever game to get into my pants?
Now I want to make a new account that has almost the same details to see if she messages that one but I don't want to go back to the asylum, I know how deep it goes. I either hunt down this bot or make a counter-bot to cross-check all the shit she and other recruiters are telling me.
Or maybe this is exactly what they want to happen.. For me to lose my mind and post in a forum where I would "unintentionally" spread the word and they can attract/trap more people.
Fuck it, early onset dementia.2
My dad only cares about how much I make... And whether I have an office. I have been working remotely lately, and to him it seems like I am lying about having a job2
New spin on an old joke
Three Comp. Sci. Professors get on the first pilot-less plane they are then told that their students wrote the landing software. All but one of the professors gets off. When the one that stayed on was asked why he didn't get off he said:"you have to be lying because my student's code never compiles "2
Lying bastard of a teacher.
This is year I'll graduate from my high school. But before that we have to pass the final examination. One part of that examination is presenting a project, which we should complete within this year. Each student has to choose a mentor/supervisor to help him on them on their project. I chose a professor who'll leave the school in January because of her pregnancy.
This is the part where the bastard, who asked me whether I use HTML or CSS for a website, barges in.
Given the fact that he incompetence be matched by his arrogance, nobody would ever choose him. He has to watch while other ring the other professors. He asks desperately for students, but everyone already has a mentor.
Yesterday he told me that my mentor will leave this January and that she already WROTE him an email where she asked him to continue mentoring her students. I was kinda confused, so I told him I would talk it over with my mentor and guve him an answer on a later date.
Today the truth comes forth. She didn't write anything. This bastard invented all of it. She even told us that she is aware of this guy is incompetent and that she would have asked a teacher with a good reputation.
But I'm furious. Not only did he waste my precious time with that conversation, which he follow up with the most basic way of time managing you could think of.
HE STRAIGHT UP LIED TO STUDENTS TRYING TO BOOST HIS NONEXISTENT REPUTATION.
I am not comfortable with a person like that being able to give me marks. Just yeet him out already!5
Your system doesn't work and you wasted everyone's time so why don't you just give up, dive from the 50th floor, and smash that watermelon you call a brain case?
Every fucking time someone attempts to make an online ***sYsTeM*** for the sake of "convenience", it does nothing but give everyone a headache because the people administering it are too dumb for life. I walked in to your office asking how to secure an authorization letter, you said I should just ask the owner to email you the letter and you would print and sign it. All is done, you acknowledged the email and you said "Noted" so we're good now, right?
Nope. I walked in to your office again to ask for the signed and printed letter, you tell me you can't sign it because there are missing information - some shit you didn't mention when I first asked you. I told you that you gave an OK to the request, you denied. When I looked for the email and tried to show you your own fucking response on the spot, you said "Oh, oh wait. I did. But you are missing this and that." Talk about a lying piece of shit whore mouth.
So what the fuck did you "accept" then? You choke and try to make shit up about how you could be referring to some other information that are good but there are still some that are missing. So why did you not respond to the email and told me so the first time around? Am I supposed to read everyone's fucking mind around here? Is there even a mind to read in the first place? Seriously, is this my life now?
Apparently, I have to come down to your office, email you, come down to your office again, email you again, and then come down to your office again? Ooh, the convenience. The SYSTEM. What a process. Innovative. Ingenious. Brain damage-inducing experience. It's like accepting a merge request and then blaming the requester why it got merged. Fuuuuck you~~~~
Does that make any fucking sense to you, you bimbo useless piece of shit? You try to be a smart ass about it but you know you're wrong, you response-happy piece of shit. If you just apologized instead of lying and blaming your way around competence, I wouldn't have reported you. This is why you're stuck in that fucking desk, you basic bitch. Savor what little power you have but you're gonna get a feedback of the lifetime.
I swear to god, some people are just fertilizers waiting to happen. You'd think that technology would filter out your kind but instead 8 out of 10 people that interact with you develop new sets of hemorrhoids in various flower patterns. Every sword fish that found a home in my desecrated asshole are now coming out and killing themselves because even your shit is just too much for them.
I hate this city. God damn, I fucking hate it here. I just got back from vacation all happy and chill, yet these selfish fucks are masters in pushing my buttons.17
My Aunt works for a company for which I did a website. She shows me a plastic cup with a pretty design and a qr code on it and asks me if I knew anything about that. I declined and she continued to tell me that her boss claims I can connect the qr code to some location on the website. Of course I can't. Now they have 2000 of these things lying around the office with a stock qr code that is invalid7
Never thought I will be hired by Chinese software/hardware company located in NYC to code in languages I don't know so well. Instead of lying and saying I know everything about C, PHP and SQL, I said that I suck pretty much at everything, but I'm a quick learner and will study day and night to catch up with their practices. Now I see they have no regret about me, but I still suspect them in hiring me because there is another guy who is Russian too and we all communicate well. Our current squad is 17 Chinese, 2 Russians, 1 Americans. Guess what, I learn Mandarin quicker than PHP. Sometimes a small lie is OK, but sometimes honesty is better.3
Why is it that every time an international company creates a local entity in this country, it turns into a boomerfest cringe factory? The company could be advanced in technology and the managers and organizers pull the culture back to the old colonization period.
Attended a training where the attendants suck up to the host and organizers like children or with some air of inferiority. The whole thing felt like elementary school and this is a call with participants who are 20 - 50+ years old. "Ma'am, Sir, I'm done with my attendance, Ma'am, Sir." Okay, Fernando and the gang, you just had to submit the spreadsheet as stated a thousand times. There is no need to keep unmuting yourselves and asking the "teacher" if she can see your name there or "Am peenished with the attendance, mam, ser." I can hear dogs barking, roosters screaming, all the damn noise. And people keep raising their hands on Zoom accidentally.
Then the organizers said shit like "You have to turn on your camera the whole time so we know you're listening." Bitch, there are 100+ participants, you cannot. I can literally turn on my camera for an hour and mute the shit out of you, it means nothing. An hour was wasted with the attendance bullshit and dumbass threats about kicking people who don't turn on their cameras. I didn't turn on my camera because fuck no, they can kick my plump ass away from the house of cringe, I don't care.
"You have to wear something professional and don't lie down. I saw someone lying down, we should be professional." I find that semi-reasonable but it would have been great if you indicated that in the invite especially when you scheduled this call so early in the morning. Instead we received useless crap like a picture of the receipt indicating how much the company paid for it. It was cheap and no one gives a shit.
"We will call you one by one especially those who have their webcams off to make sure you are listening. We're gonna have a recitation." All this shit said in such an elementary school teacher manner. It just reeks of third world. It makes every cell in my body cringe.
"We're gonna have an exam so pay attention." Yeah, could have just said that in the beginning or in the fucking email. That's a more effective way to make sure people would listen instead of policing cameras and treating people like children. There's a guy who's probably like 69, just a year younger than Demolishun, and dying by the second. He doesn't have much time for this shit.
One guy was a foreigner who only understands English so he had to pull in some dude who speaks our native language to translate certain things for him. They are both sitting there in the dark like some censored interview about drug dealers. Everyone else and the street dogs are bilingual, the slides are in English, what is even the point? Jesus. So another few minutes wasted on that.
The training finally starts and the host is sooo cringe. He keeps making the dumbest jokes. Right around the terrorism topic, he mentioned 9/11 as an example then called my name (of course) to ask why no Filipinos died during that attack. I assumed it was another stupid joke so I just said I don't know. He said, "It's because they were late." I humored him and said, "Filipino time, lol." He said, "No, no, just kidding."
The whole time, I was typing his jokes to the group chat I have with my team mates so they can die along with me. All of them expressed the urge to smack the guy with a rolled newspaper in the face. That is how I survived the entire training, by dragging others down the misery hole with me. I'm so glad it was over.
For context, "Filipino time" refers to the habit of being late a few minutes or sometimes a few hours than the set appointment. You can yell racism all you want but being late is almost expected here and the locals learned to make fun of themselves. I can see it changing but the habit is still common in provinces or city cunts who make everyone wait to make themselves feel important.
I personally hate being late and I turn up at least 15 minutes before the scheduled time. Yet another reason why I like the Germans. In before "BuT aNyOnE cAn bE LaTe oR pUnCtUaL." Fuck you.30
That moment when your at a career fair and a non-tech recruiter won't hire you because you don't have the paper experience but the tech recruiter is questioning a guy with "5 years of Java experience" who can't answer what an anonymous inner class is.1
So I used to do some freelancing in web development last year, nothing too fancy just some simple PHP websites. Comes the worst meeting in my life. So I am from India and we have a lot of long lasting business here being passed on over generations. TL;DR the guy was the owner of a very old business which was actually very huge and the guy was educated too, so I assumed that he'll be sensible as compared to other people.
The meeting was in an expensive cafe and he paid for it, he even told me upfront that meeting is on him. Great, right? So we sit down, order some coffee and then start discussing what he needed.
The guy needed an ecommerce website built with backend and logistics system integrated. We discussed possible designs for the website and stuff too and so far the deal looked promising to both of us.
I explained him the cost estimate and told him that I would email him the final quote from myself once we discussed server cost and shit.
So now comes the bargaining part where he asked me to give him server and domain for free.
At this point, I suspected that he didn't know that servers and domains are not something that you make. You have to purchase and renew them periodically.
So I told that guy that he didn't understand the cost estimation and explained to him that X is the cost of making this fucking thing and Y is its monthly maintenance cost, if he wanted annually could be done too. And this Y did not include server and domain costing.
Now came the fucking tide, the guy straight up turned to his shit and told me I am lying and trying to con him. So I gently asked him if he had ever gotten any website made. To which, he said No, but he knows how the costing works.
I was like "Bitch?". So I calmly tried to explain that that's not how websites are done, delivered and maintained.
He didn't seemed to be understanding and kept on fucking repeating that he knows his shit and blah blah.
At this point, I was like "Okay. Fuck this dude then. I can find another project. " and then I told him that he'll need to find someone according to his needs.
Interestingly enough, the guy called someone and then walked out of the cafe while talking on phone. I waited for 5 minutes and he didn't come back so I decided I would pay for my coffee and leave. Turns out the guy had paid his bill before my arrival and ditched me with the excuse of the call.
But oh well, I think working with such an idiot would have been much worse than paying for that coffee.4
This memory came up as I was commenting on another rant, and thought it was worthy of a better retelling.
So about a year or two ago, I had just gotten a Software Defined Radio, and was tinkering with it and looking around for cool stuff I could do with it. After stalking planes for a while (caught a 747 over my area 😎) I saw this program that decoded satellite images of earth, coming from the NOAA satellites. I thought this was amazing.
So I waited until one was over my area and let the software do its magic. The image was not great, since I had this set up on the first floor and there was a lot of material between me and the satellite.
So I came to the brilliant conclusion that I'd leave the program on automatic more (it will start sampling when the satellite is near) on my terrace, which should yield better results, right?
Perhaps. Who knows. Anyways, couple hours pass and we are running late to a family dinner. So we book it. Family dinner was great, good food and all, and was having fun, so never thought about my poor laptop, sitting alone in the night.
But then, when I was walking home in the rain... It hit me. I started running. I couldn't believe what I had done. Fast forward five minutes, and I'm out of breath, but home. I run upstairs, and see the laptop just sitting there, lid open, no lights on, and of course soaked right through.
I couldn't believe it. My only piece of tech at the time, and my only avenue for programming, gone. And I was 15, so I wasn't getting another one any time soon. Took it inside and drained the water out of it, and just left it there lying on its side.
Next day it worked just fine 🤣 the battery on my laptop only lasted max one hour, so by sheer luck it had lost power before the rain came. That is the one time I have to thank that battery for being such utter trash.7
“Arya” and I were classmates in college. We were in the same year and did the same major. We’ve known each other for 16 years and have worked together twice; one time she was my manager and the other time I was hers. We often attend the same work-related conferences and exchange thoughts on articles that appear in industry publications. Our relationship is a professional one, although I did attend her wedding because her husband was in the same fraternity as me, and she did introduce me to my future husband at a networking charity event. Besides her wedding, we have never talked outside of work or a networking event.
I was hiring for a position and one of the promising candidates was working for Arya and had put her down as a reference. Arya sung her praises and told me she was the best employee in the department. The position I was hiring for would be a promotion for the candidate, and Arya said there was no room for promotion in her department at the moment. Based on Arya’s glowing review and the same from another manager there (and her strong resume), I hired her.
It was a catastrophe. Her work was sloppy and disorganized. She struggled to do basic tasks, missed deadlines, and was sometimes cold to her coworkers and clients. She was asked to take point on a project because her resume listed a similar project, and it went so far off the rails we had to bring in outside help to get it back on track. I know a promotion and new company can be an adjustment, but she was incompetent beyond having to adjust to a new place. Her mistakes cost us so much money she had to be fired.
When I spoke to Arya the first time, she played dumb. The second time, she admitted to lying about how good the candidate was because she was tired of dealing with her mistakes and wanted her gone. She told the candidate she wouldn’t fire her if she quickly left on her own and promised a good reference in exchange. The other manager agreed to do the same thing when Arya asked him to. Arya also told the candidate to lie about how long she worked there to make it seem like she was there longer and to put the project on her resume even though she wasn’t point on it. Arya said it was business and nothing personal.
After she was fired, my boss told me the bad candidate is being investigated by federal authorities for regulatory violations from her time at Arya’s company. The investigation started just when we were interviewing her, and Arya knew about it and didn’t tell me. The other manager is also being investigated for the same violations, which is how Arya got him to lie about the candidate. If the candidate had not left her job there, she would have been fired when word of the investigation got out. We had another candidate who worked for Arya, and Arya told me he was a mediocre employee who does the bare minimum. He just won two different prestigious industry awards. Arya also admitted to lying about him because she didn’t want him to leave. He still works at the same company as her.
I’m angry. She knowingly lied to me. I put stock in her opinion because of our relationship. I feel stupid and duped. I’m afraid making such a bad hire and passing up a good candidate will make me look bad and affect my career. My boss and her boss are upset about this debacle, and everyone knows something is up because the regulators came in when they found out the candidate worked here. They haven’t found anything yet but everyone is still nervous. The other manager who lied about the bad candidate has already been arrested and, based on what the bad candidate is accused of, she will likely be arrested soon also. (Arya cooperated with authorities, isn’t being investigated, and isn’t accused of doing anything against regulations.)
I don’t plan on talking to Arya again beyond being arms-length and professionally cool if I run into her at a conference and others are present. I’m not even sure if I can go to her boss because I don’t have any proof beyond her telling me verbally. Whether I knew her or not, the lie was egregious. Do I tell her boss? Do I confront her or leave it alone? She didn’t show any guilt or apologize to me.8
So the ceiling in our (upstairs) laundry room started leaking. After some troubleshooting, we determined it was the A/C, and not the water pipes. (The house is cheap as hell and fucking stupid.) We did some troubleshooting and research, and tried fixing it ourselves; no luck. Cleaning the pipes from outside: no joy. Cleaning the pipes from inside: no access. The attic is ... small. Maybe half a small closet? and doesn’t give access to fucking anything. The builders must have installed everything before putting up the walls and ceilings, sealing everything off, because there is no access. It’s fucking stupid. Also, the usual maintenance openings aren’t even there either because why the fuck would they be?
But fucking whatever.
We called an a/c repair guy, who never showed. We assumed he was busy (it’s fucking hot), so we called him again the next day; two days later he showed.
Guy didn’t bring a ladder. Whatever, we have one right there in the hallway because we’ve been trying in vain to fix it.
Guy didn’t bring a wrench of any kind. Guy didn’t bring a screwdriver. Guy didn’t bring a bucket. Guy didn’t bring any pipe. Or any pipe sealant. Or fucking anything but his sagging fucking pants, fat belly, and fat stench. We had to supply everything, which fortunately we had on hand as we were already trying to fix it. Hoorah for being proactive.
Guy said he drained both primary and secondary pans. Somehow. Without access. I’m not even convinced it HAS a secondary pan. Guy said he cleaned out the pipes, too. From inside the house. Without access. Somehow. Maybe he did that from outside, without tools, while I was chasing the brats and someone else was watching the fat bastard. Who knows; I wasn’t with him most of the time.
When he was done, the guy said “pay whatever you think it’s worth” (or whatever). Fine, if he actually cleaned the pipes out and it isn’t leaking anymore, that’s great.
We go up to check. AND THE FUCKING A/C IS STILL LEAKING. BUT NOW IT’S FROM BEFORE THE PIPES, TOO. AND HALF AN HOUR LATER, THE LAUDRY ROOM CEILING IS ALSO LEAKING, WHICH MEANS THE PIPES ARE STILL LEAKING.
It turns out the asshole broke the pan.
We call him back, he goes blah blah blah, we send him a video. Drip, drip, drip.
“The pan must be rusted.” IT’S FUCKING PLASTIC.
“Oh, in that case, it’s probably a rusted coil that’s leaking.”
a) HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW IT WAS FUCKING PLASTIC IF YOU DRAINED IT?
b) THE COILS CARRY FREON, NOT WATER, AND THE A/C IS STILL WORKING. IF THERE WAS A LEAK, SHIT WOULD BE HOT. AND RANK. FREON SMELLS NASTY AND DOESN’T CAUSE IT TO RAIN IN THE FUCKING HOUSE.
REPLACING A COIL IS ALSO A $2000 FUCKING REPAIR.
THE FAT BASTARD PROBABLY BROKE THE PAN INTENTIONALLY JUST TO UPSELL. I WANT TO FUCKING MURDER HIS LYING FUCKING FACE OFF.
It’s possible he didn’t break the pan intentionally, so I’ll tentatively remove that from his charges. BUT TO FUCKING LIE?
LIE AND DIE, FUCKER.9
We are devs right?
We have cpus and gpus lying around right?
We are still alive... right? 🤔
How about we do our part and utilise our PCs for helping with COVID-19 research.
I've stumbled across this little tool that not only keeps me warm at night but helps researchers with several diseases.
It's like a a bitcoin miner but for research purposes, no it's not a dodgy bitcoin miner.
Oh and feel free to keep yourself anonymous as there are stats that will identify your username - when they work.
There are installers for windows, Mac, and linux distros so everyone can get involved.32
Finally got a new job, but it's already a horror story not even 2 hours in (making this while on break)
Everyone here is an Intern, IT? Interns, Designers? Interns, HR? Interns.
The Person who I should've worked with got fired yesterday, and now I have to work all of his shit up from 0, Documentation? Fragmental, a few things here and there, but nothing really.
IT security also doesn't exist in the slightest, there is an Excel sheet called "Master_Passwords" and every single password is in Plaintext, written out for everyone to see. (at least they used "strong" passwords)
And the place also looks run down, theres PC's, Laptops, Mics, Cables etc. lying literally everywhere no-one knows what works and what doesn't (since everyone is an intern)
Not to mention the "Server Room" is an absolute mess itself, cables hanging from literally anywhere, powerstrips are ontop of servers, each rack has like 2 or 3 2U Servers, (in a 40u Rack) and there are 10 of them!5
Not to get political, but apparently the political climate in the world leads to the following situation.
"I'm being a fucking evil lying asshole. But I'm actually a good guy, because I'm doing it as pseudo-scientific research to show how easy it is to be evil and dishonest"
("Researchers" with an anti-FOSS motive attempting software supply chain attacks on Linux kernel)
What's next? "Scientists" killing puppies to show that, if someone was inclined to be that evil, puppies are weak and their necks snap easily?16
Me: *reading work order* Customer states Mac does not have sound
*Me turns on Mac, it makes the signature "BONNNNG" sound*
Me: Uh huh...
Coworker: Rule No. 1 of tech support: The users always lie
Me: True, but still! How do you miss the start up Mac sound?!3
Me to designer: "I did the research and this just isn't possible to implement, I'm sorry"
What I actually mean: "There's a couple of ways I could implement that feature, but all of them require me to do sketchy things that destroy my integrity as a programmer."5
This is going to be a rant, but personally, I'm pleased with the outcome of my life now.
I was part of a community for a few years and decided to help them out with my knowledge of programming Lua nearly 2 years ago since they lacked developers for the project itself.
Since it was sort of a custom language that they modified how Lua worked on it, it took me a bit to adapt, but within a few weeks, I was pretty fluent in this so-called custom language they had. Began working on some major updates, additions, removals, and just optimizing this code base. It was a pretty old code base and needed a good chunk of love.
A few months later, I've implemented loads of features, optimized the base whenever I could, and then things start taking a turn for the worse. We get new 'developers' who haven't ever coded the language, and worse they couldn't afford to provide them development servers thus they ended up breaking my servers. I helped them and they learned, they were decent, but now the Seniors and CEO's of the project began to take a toll on me.
I was told that this community had a reputation of driving out developers, ruining their reputations, and that is what started happening. I started getting questioned if I was loyal to helping them, that I've become lazy, even though they were explained I've had mental health issues for a few years and have been hospitalized multiple times.
These sort of attacks kept happening for months, and then they finally pushed my buttons, where I was talking to another Senior of how we should redo the base since it's just so massive and a few tiny updates to the base take a few days to implement across the entire code. What instead happened was that I went to sleep, and this Senior told the CEO I was going to steal the code base and go sell it...
I woke up to messages of how the CEO is all pissed off, and that this what the Senior said. At this point, I started responding with, fuck it. I was so sick and fucking tired of their bullshit. I was the only fucking competent developer, and I did more work in the few months I was there then some people did in 2 or 3 years.
A few hours later I decided to go chat with the CEO and explained what was truly brought up, and he just brushed it off like I was lying. At that point, I lost it. I told him why the code base was horrible since he hired stupid ass developers. He didn't know how to code. People wanted certain items, and he wouldn't be able to add them for fucking months and players sit there making fun of it. Some people state the only differences they see within the code is the code I've done. Basically, he was an incompetent fuck that said he knew what he was doing, and had all these big plans for the future yet couldn't listen to the only competent developer and fucking claimed bullshit.
Now a few months have gone by, I'm looking at their community and it's basically dead with no proper updates except for copy and paste updates claiming to be custom coded. While I'm working on my real life businesses (Which are currently being a headache, but within the year should resolve its issues), starting University for my Computer Science degree here soon, and even considering building my own game here.
Basically, karma is a bitch and that's why when you get loyal people in your life, keep them. (Writing this at 3 am after a few drinks, hopefully, it made sense, I think it does.)
Anyways, goodnight everyone.5
The funny thing is I have never been rejected. I know you think I am lying, but everyone I have ever interviewed with wanted to hire me.10
Behold the results of photoshopping pictures for the last 3 weeks....
Now I should be able to delete 10GB of RAWs from my 256GB SSD....
Next up, the 4 hours of videos.... and my interview tomorrow.... wish me luck?7
Can I just say that the absolute most important skill for any kind of programmer or engineer is knowing HOW TO FUCKING GOOGLE!!!
I am the head of programing on my school's Robotics Team. We're relatively know, however most all of my teammates know how to program and they are all very talented academically. In fact my "Lieutenant" will be the valedictorian.
Seriously I missed one meeting yesterday because of the flu. Imagine me lying in bed and suddenly getting multiple calls from the team (even the valedictorian) asking how to fix errors from Android Studio. I asked them if they googled them and they said "No we didn't".
Why is knowing how to google not apart of any kind of CS education! They could have been after an hour, but NOOO it took them after 5 hours!!
Oh my FUCKING GOD!!5
Thank you for fucking me
Thank you for sucking me
Thank you for lying to me
Thank you for showing your true self
Thank you for teaching me what type of people to avoid
Thank you for sharpening my focus
Thank you for making me suffer
Thank you for improving my grind
Thank you for being a bitch
Thank you for being a whore
For now i have taken heavy damage and a heavy loss of time
For i shall take it as a reminder
A lesson to never forget
Short term gain
Long term fulfillment
And vice versa
The perfect balance
You will not be missed
I am done dealing with this fuckin bullshit
No, it's not damaged. Yes, it most definitely can be opened. No, I should not move it to the trash, because I want to open it.
Quit your bullshit Apple and stop telling me what I should do.5
So a few days ago I shared about the conflict with my colleague on learning React. Today I was let go. Obviously I asked why they would do that and they said they feel the problem isn't even my React knowledge but the fact I don't grasp the fundamentals of OO programming.
Thing is in these 3 months there has not been a single code review. They are either going of what my lying colleague told them (they claimed he was excluded from giving feedback), or the consultants who were hired to help us. And yes, I got feedback I should improve but at the same time the assurance so long as I show improvement it'd be fine. And I was told they could see improvement. So I'm not sure what changed but suddenly there is no budget to keep me on. In any case it feels like shitty corporate bullshit.
But I can't say they are wrong. I struggle to explain simple concepts I know in words. I've worked a series of bad jobs where nobody cared how you did stuff as long as it got done. I feel I'm so behind now and so affected by bad knowledge it's even harder to fix than to learn the first time. So I'm wondering how to fix this.
I'm really gutted too because I loved this company. I was finally getting a fair wage instead of being underpaid. The people were excellent. I felt I could finally relax and feel safe at work. And now I feel betrayed. Which for someone with self esteem issues is very hard. Can't trust in myself and can't trust in others.
I'm gonna try and pick myself up in the morning, but today I feel totally shit. This wasn't how I'd expected things to go. I thought my manager had intended to talk conflicts over but instead I get the boot. And the advice to stop overselling myself. Real useful that. Like it is on me that they hired me despite my subpar interview because my CV looked good. It's a shitty excuse. In any case they're now stuck with a dev that walks out of work, throws false accusations about colleagues, and another person warned me about to not engage because nothing good ever came from it. He's gonna keep over engineering everything and make up for all the time he wastes outside of work creating a dysfunctional environment for everyone. But yeah, easier to fire the new person who does her best despite the odds. And who cautioned against over engineering because we kept missing deadlines. And who believes in refactoring when it is needed because that's how agile works. Yeah better keep someone who has no sense of work life balance and makes others miserable then claiming he's being driven out by your ignorance. And of course the consultants who throw your own people under the bus. Can't get rid of those now.7
So today I realized that Im not happy.
When I was a kid I wanted to do many things because I had time and energy but I had no money. Now that Im an adult and I have the money, I have no energy and no will power to try and have personal life in these few hours left of my day. I spend 9 hours at work everyday and totally 1hr 30min is wasted on commuting.
I spent 4 years in uni between lectures and working on my side projects, and I really believed that after uni I will get a job and my life work balance will improve.
After uni I spent 2 years working abroad in 3 jobs at 3 countries. I work as android dev and now Im making a really decent salary.
However Im not happy at all. I realized that life is not about the money. Im changing countries like socks and dont even feel the need to socialize or enjoy my life anymore. Im european and these other eu countries are not that different at all. It came to a point where relationships are meaningless to me. I became an office drone who cares only about work and outside of work I care only about my projects and more work.
At this point im only 25 years old with around 2 years of experience and money is really good, but fuck it Im so tired of being an emigrant and having no stability in life. Im so drained. I spent past 6 years (4 in uni combined with side projects and 2 years working in 3 jobs in different countriee) working my ass off and lying to myself that after the next big thing Im gonna take a break and enjoy life. But its never enough. I dont want to hit 30s or 40s and realize that I wasted my life on pursuing money and didnt get to enjoy life..
Im really considering taking a 6-12 months vacation. I need to find myself. Probably going back to my own country. Just learn how to enjoy life, attend workshops, get to know new city area, meet new people, do some interesting hobbies. Maybe do a little freelance (max 10hrs a week).
Im tired of feeling like I need to make as much money as I can and learn as much about my work as I can. Its not rewarding because its never enough.
Whats the point in that money if I cant enjoy it?9
I swear next time I see a UHD TV sold as 4K I'm gonna pop a cap in the lying fucker who mislabeled it!
4K has 552,960 more pixels dammit! This is the "720 HD" bullshit all over again!2
Look, I'm not even mad that your dataset is the spaghettiest of all spaghetti, but why do you have ten different jupyter notebook files lying around?
I mean, I'm not implying that a monkey has more brain in his armpit than you have in your entire body, but like, you call this a dataset while all over seen so far is half-processed garbage. You could've just dipped your pc in sewage and the results would still be cleaner than this.
Luckily, your paper is half decent so what the hell, let's see if I can fish anything useful out of this. But I swear to god if I come across another static path in this... And here we go! Another static path! Ladies and gentlemen, I propose we get this guy's phd back until he learns to fucking do a decent code.
(It's actually a massively complicated project, so it kinda makes sense to be this big of a mess. But still!)10
Alright boys, let me tell you how someone fucked up so hard they got their deployment schedule delayed "indefinitely".
Being security, we get to oversee most deployments, and we especially get to oversee all deployments that are on IT-managed tech. Knowing fullwell about this fact, some dumb motherfuckers woke up and thought to themselves "You know what would be good fun? To piss on security's asshole and then try and ream them up the backside before they notice the piss!"
Well let me tell you, we noticed. And our boss noticed. And his boss noticed. And the CIO noticed. Thus it came down the chain that this particular group of lie-spurting, baseless accusation-leveling group of developers would have their deployments put on hold. How long? "A while."
I have never quite heard my higher-ups this mad before, but damn if i dont share in their enthusiasm to stick it to entitled cunts.17
My tablet is lying on a table 2m away from me and I have to install a new app.. but I don't want to get out of my couch ffs! And I haven't configured dropbear in it yet, and neither do I have adb over TCP/IP. Well fuck it then. My desktop with BlueStacks.. hah, it's running fucking WanBLowS. No remote access there. Too much to ask of that certified pile of crap.
But the point is.. moar remotes, moar better 😋 anything to not have to stand up, taught by my ability to log into a server in Italy from the comfort of my couch. SSH and the sysadmin trade sure is nothing short of amazing ♥️5
The company that I currently work for has a strict clean-desk policy. So strict, there's even have a little booklet that they have about 1000 copies of lying around the office everywhere. In the booklet is a playful description (with cartoons!) of what can go wrong when sensitive information is lying around, or shared with outsiders through careless talk, etcetera. Employees are encouraged to take a copy of the booklet home.
Also in the booklet is a description of the importance of having a good password. It mentions the required minimum (x) and maximum (x+1) length of passwords, mandatory character classes, and how often the passwords have to be changed.6
So Android phone makers have been lying about installing security patches for years. Hhhmmmm https://twitter.com/wired/status/...3
Long rant ahead.. 5k characters pretty much completely used. So feel free to have another cup of coffee and have a seat 🙂
So.. a while back this flash drive was stolen from me, right. Well it turns out that other than me, the other guy in that incident also got to the police 😃
Now, let me explain the smiley face. At the time of the incident I was completely at fault. I had no real reason to throw a punch at this guy and my only "excuse" would be that I was drunk as fuck - I've never drank so much as I did that day. Needless to say, not a very good excuse and I don't treat it as such.
But that guy and whoever else it was that he was with, that was the guy (or at least part of the group that did) that stole that flash drive from me.
Context: https://devrant.com/rants/2049733 and https://devrant.com/rants/2088970
So that's great! I thought that I'd lost this flash drive and most importantly the data on it forever. But just this Friday evening as I was meeting with my friend to buy some illicit electronics (high voltage, low frequency arc generators if you catch my drift), a policeman came along and told me about that other guy filing a report as well, with apparently much of the blame now lying on his side due to him having punched me right into the hospital.
So I told the cop, well most of the blame is on me really, I shouldn't have started that fight to begin with, and for that matter not have drunk that much, yada yada yada.. anyway he walked away (good grief, as I was having that friend on visit to purchase those electronics at that exact time!) and he said that this case could just be classified then. Maybe just come along next week to the police office to file a proper explanation but maybe even that won't be needed.
So yeah, great. But for me there's more in it of course - that other guy knows more about that flash drive and the data on it that I care about. So I figured, let's go to the police office and arrange an appointment with this guy. And I got thinking about the technicalities for if I see that drive back and want to recover its data.
So I've got 2 phones, 1 rooted but reliant on the other one that's unrooted for a data connection to my home (because Android Q, and no bootable TWRP available for it yet). And theoretically a laptop that I can put Arch on it no problem but its display backlight is cooked. So if I want to bring that one I'd have to rely on a display from them. Good luck getting that done. No option. And then there's a flash drive that I can bake up with a portable Arch install that I can sideload from one of their machines but on that.. even more so - good luck getting that done. So my phones are my only option.
Just to be clear, the technical challenge is to read that flash drive and get as much data off of it as possible. The drive is 32GB large and has about 16GB used. So I'll need at least that much on whatever I decide to store a copy on, assuming unchanged contents (unlikely). My Nexus 6P with a VPN profile to connect to my home network has 32GB of storage. So theoretically I could use dd and pipe it to gzip to compress the zeroes. That'd give me a resulting file that's close to the actual usage on the flash drive in size. But just in case.. my OnePlus 6T has 256GB of storage but it's got no root access.. so I don't have block access to an attached flash drive from it. Worst case I'd have to open a WiFi hotspot to it and get an sshd going for the Nexus to connect to.
And there we have it! A large storage device, no root access, that nonetheless can make use of something else that doesn't have the storage but satisfies the other requirements.
And then we have things like parted to read out the partition table (and if unchanged, cryptsetup to read out LUKS). Now, I don't know if Termux has these and frankly I don't care. What I need for that is a chroot. But I can't just install Arch x86_64 on a flash drive and plug it into my phone. Linux Deploy to the rescue! 😁
It can make chrooted installations of common distributions on arm64, and it comes extremely close to actual Linux. With some Linux magic I could make that able to read the block device from Android and do all the required sorcery with it. Just a USB-C to 3x USB-A hub required (which I have), with the target flash drive and one to store my chroot on, connected to my Nexus. And fixed!
Let's see if I can get that flash drive back!
P.S.: if you're into electronics and worried about getting stuff like this stolen, customize it. I happen to know one particular property of that flash drive that I can use for verification, although it wasn't explicitly customized. But for instance in that flash drive there was a decorative LED. Those are current limited by a resistor. Factory default can be say 200 ohm - replace it with one with a higher value. That way you can without any doubt verify it to be yours. Along with other extra security additions, this is one of the things I'll be adding to my "keychain v2".11
Walk down the street. Accidentally discover I'm in the way of none other than Stephen Hawking.
Not even lying about that.
Feel like a fucking rock star.6
Well, devRant has turned me from a bigot arse into quite the humble and decent person, and on top of that, introduced me to some new series (well more so the users than the platform, but you know what I mean).
Binge watched Silicon Valley (season one, I just started) and learnt about dick to floor ratio.
Prior to that binge watched Mr Robot. Cannot remember who suggested that, so I cannot attribute the appropriate gratitude to the appropriate person here.
Add to that that I no longer claim one language to be holy amongst others. Yeah. I was that dick before, we all have a bad side. I'm just admitting it.
I sat down and started utilising other languages, and even found quite a few that did what I wanted more efficiently. Plus I have gotten to meet some sharp people and broaden my own mind.
Fuck I hate my job, but I see a fucking brilliant future for myself thanks to coding and the open mind that I have attained. I attribute this to devRant (perhaps it was lying dormant, but you guys awoke it.).
Enough chitty chat, I'm off to sleep and then code my balls off.2
This whole experience thing is really killing me.
"We like you a lot and you seem to have a solid understanding of the core concepts but you just lack the experience we need"
I've heard that basic response from plenty of different potential employers. Granted they could be lying just to be nice but that doesn't help the situation either.
Like tell me where I am lacking and where to improve.
Yea I can learn on my own but they're a lot of things I will never think about touching or gain any knowledge of because it's not something I may ever need to dive into during just everyday apps. There is a difference in building a hobby app to learn and what goes into a full blown application handling thousands of users and all the data that can come along with it. Not to mention the kind of things that can go wrong when you have thousands of users on your app at the same time all doing different things. That's not something I can just have experience with. If I could just get in somewhere I can prove myself because then I will be doing it each and everyday.
Gotta keep grinding though, I'll get something eventually.2
I finally gave in into the peer pressure and made myself a Twitter account.
WHAT A FUCKING SHIT SITE.
When registering the only thing I provided was my email and username. Nothing more.
One day later when visiting Twitter I get a big ass pop-up that briefly tells me my account is locked for 'unusual behavior', 'suspicious activity' and 'not following of Twitter's rules'.
I want to remind you that my account was barely one day old, and had no activity whatsoever.
So if getting your account locked for no single reason isn't bad enough. The only and ONLY way to unlock my account was TO PROVIDE MY FUCKING PHONE NUMBER. No other single way to unlock my account.
YOU WANT MY PERSONAL DATA SO BADLY?
On top of that I didn't receive a single email from them for this 'suspicious activity' or 'breaking of Twitter's rules'.
THIS IS SCAREWARE. Lying to people in order to get more personal data. My account was perfectly fine. And without providing your phone number you can't even delete your account.
GO FUCK YOURSELF FUCKING ASSHOLES WITH YOUR ASSHOLE DESIGN
Why is it that an issue is only critical-priority until the person who's raising the biggest fuss has to do something about it?
I was notified that a website hosted in AWS went down overnight and never came back up. I was then bombarded with email after email after email while I logged into our AWS account and poked around. I'm responsible for cloud infrastructure stuff, like VMs or virtual networking or security or whatever, not the actual applications running on said infrastructure. Once I confirmed their EC2 instance was reachable and I could login with SSH, I told them they'd have to fix their application.
They told me that they had no backend developer on their development team. I'm still getting a deluge of emails from multiple people on this team and their managers and managers' managers and so on.
"Perfectly understandable," I told them, though it was anything but. "You should probably look into obtaining one."
The emails stopped immediately. I assumed they were handling it and closed my ticket and moved on. But apparently I was wrong.
Six weeks later, the site is still down, they still have no backend dev, and I'm convinced that they were lying to me when they stressed the importance of this web app because now that it's no longer my problem, not a single person seems to care that it's still broken.3
As a person who takes a lot of tech interviews everyday, here are a few thoughts
1. You DON’T need to know everything, it’s okay to say you don’t know things. Trust me, we know when you’re lying
2. Rule of thumb, the more the number of questions, the more we like you
3. We don’t mind you saying what you’re thinking when we ask a logical question. It might help us understand your approach to the problem and guide you.
4. Don’t google during telephonic interview, your stutter tells us the truth10
I worked at a company that was the HQ for a sizable organization for a while, until it was eventually bought out by another company, and then yet another company who was located in the valley.
We were kinda a forgotten office not being the HQ, like most places like that are.
No customers EVER visited our building, few if any people knew we existed even, even our own company. I visited HQ in the valley on a number of occasions and was stalked by the video monitoring system for hours before I was stopped by security and the cops called because nobody believed there as an office outside the valley when I explained why my badge looked different .... (San Jose cops were very nice about it and really pissed at the security team.) But that's another story...
One day people who were never at our office decided (after many meetings without talking to anyone at the office) ... they decided the beige walls at our office didn't match the company colors.
So they took all the generic wall coverings down and painted all the walls an almost imperceptible different color.
So now we had an office with all white(ish) walls and nothing on them. Due to the configuration of the building there were these huge monolithic white walls that looked pretty dumb.
This lasted quite a while so as a joke I printed up and framed (found an old frame, as a former HQ we had lots of stuff lying around) a sign that said:
"This space intentionally left blank."
When the "mediocre hotel room quality art" and posters were scheduled to go up the folks putting the art up skipped that wall thinking the sign was official.
Even the somewhat corporate drone directors, and one VP at our office thought it was so funny, they didn't say a word about it. Word has it back at HQ they assumed it "must be fire code or something" and told the folks hanging the crappy art to skip that wall.
It lasted on that wall for a decade until we moved out of that building. On the last day, everything was moved, but that sign remained. No idea if it is still there or not...2
Wow, I just realized the marketing teams of most of the companies I have been dealing with are some cold sociopaths.
Every other letter that pops in the mailbox is filled with dark patterns trying to guilt me into opting in to their continued spam:
Subject: Most awesome husky puppy!
Look at this beautiful husky puppy. Isn't it beautiful.... It would be sad if something happened to it... But I am afraid... Something will happen to it...
If you don't opt in to our email message... I am afraid we have no choice... We have to kill this puppy. End it's life... We have no choice. I wish we did! Nothing would please us more than keeping this beautiful-beautiful puppy living and playing....
But if you don't opt in... We have to cut it's throat. Leave it lying on the ground, bleeding out as the life slowly fades away from it's pretty blue eyes...
And Remember: it's not us who killed it... IT WAS YOU! YOUR ACTIONS LEAD TO THE DEATH OF THIS PUPPY! YOU.... YOU FILTHY MURDERER!
Pls opt-in ok, then we are all good. Puppy lives! Just opt in. Ok? Yeah, you know what you have to do.3
My old job was almost perfect. I was a systems engineer for a research network. My duties were to configure, build, install, secure, manage and repair Linux hosts used for research on projects so advanced/cutting edge that I could spend days just listening to researchers explaining them and I honestly loved it! I understood less than half of the projects but just seeing how motivated and excited the researchers are made the job my favourite. Unfortunately I had to leave and get a job closer to my house because having a 2 hour (one way) commute for two years was killing me :-/ relocation wasn't an option and still isn't but I'd be lying to myself if I tried to say I wouldn't go back as soon as I could.2
First thing on Monday. The very first thing.
I fucking killed prod.
Reminder to my future self to either stash local config files and .htaccess files... or add them to gitignore... But either way, don't leave them lying around assuming I won't do something dumb and accidentally commit them. Because some fateful Monday morning before I've had my coffee I'm going to do something dumb.8
I am going to post cryptic ass shit on y'alls shit that gives over a fake sense of me knowing what I am talking about in terms of faking my credentials from working on big companies and having tons of knowledge of software development in an effort to convince you all in of my credentials to get massive upvotes by making you all think I am intellectually and technologically superior to you in multiple senses! I will use a thesaurus for this btw! not my general day to day speech! after all, it will give my fake ideals of credibility more success and acceptance! remember! i worked for all companies starving kids in different parts of the world did! nothing but my word for it!
Some people really need to consider the shit they read online from people that have been caught bullshitting all the time.
9/10 your shit is good enough, stop letting phonies make you feel inadecuate over their supposed success in this works ffs19
When you're trying to get to sleep but you're just lying in bed thinking about things that annoy you at work because you were just reading DevRant.3
Why me. Why is it always me who has issues with Windows. (The OS)
I HAVE to use windows for a specific thing right now. Fair enough, I have an old system lying around somewhere with not the best specs ever but it'll do. Windows 7, clean install.
Firstly, let's boot up! Booting goes fine, login goes well... "Installing device drivers" (keyboard and mouse combi). I connected this set a gazillion times before so no clue why windows would need to download the drivers YER AGAIN. But, fine, it works.
Let's connect a USB webcam and to to the hardware testing website to see if my setup is right!
(I mostly don't blame this part on windows)
The webcam drivers install successfully, good. Although the page says it isn't working, it displays the live cam footage well so whatever.
Installed Chrome (not chromium too badly) to see if it shows fine there but chrome doesn't detect ANY cam/mic combination at all, not even the integrated one(s).
Annoying so let's reboot and see if it works normally with all checks okay on Firefox.
Rebooted.... aaaaand the USB webcam driver installation fails. I'm weirded out since the drivers were installed BEFORE the reboot already. Firefox now does not display any can/mic.... until it does after a few reloads. Windows is still saying that the driver installation failed.
The testing webpage, however, still says its not working while I'm literally seeing my ugly smug on screen. I contact support which does a remote check and says all is good but there was probably "a glitch with Windows" while the checks are still mostly red, I take a copy of the chat log just to be sure.
Now, I kinda want to shut this system down until the time I'll need it but I'm rather afraid that Windows is going to throw driver conundrums yet again and I simply *CANNOT* have this right now. So, I'm leaving this system on until I need it, and I'll pray windows plays along well.28
Has anyone felt the astonishing effect that is writing a whole bunch of test classes, hitting run for the first time and they all pass.
I'm kinda sitting here staring at my screen in disbelief, either these tests all passed, or I've really missed something and they passed anyway, or it's just a lying piece of shit trying to question my own abilities... all are possible right now.
And no, they are not " assert(1,1) "4
This happened with one of our senior profs during the first year of my college. I wouldn't call him a dev if my life depended on calling him a dev but regardless, I narrate the story here.
We were "taught" C++ by some really dumb professors during our first year of college and it was mandatory that everyone cleared the subject regardless of what field of engineering the students chose. Having already done 2 years of C++, it was quite a breeze for me. But during the final lab exam, one of my friends requested my help in solving the quite tough question (for those beginners). Thinking the exam and teaching was unfair, I stupidly wrote the answer on a piece of paper and passed it to him. One of our teachers, who had seen him ask me, was lying low waiting to catch me in the act and she swooped in and busted our asses kicking us out of the exam hall and sending us to the HoDs office like some prize from her war against academic corruption.
In the end, I failed the exam for cheating and had to redo (not only the exam but the entire lab course).
When I returned to college during the summer vacations to redo the course, I first met the antagonist of our story. Having a huge head that looked like a deformed watermelon and an ego the size of a building, he assaulted us first with a verbal diarrhoea of his achievements as a CS professor. I quickly realised that I was in a class of people who had failed to grasp how to make a program that printed "Hello World". To make things shorter, every question the prof gave us, I managed to solve in a mere matter of minutes, several better than his own solutions. Not having expected a student who knew his shit, he was determined to play me down. He hurled tougher question at me and I knocked them over his enormous head piercing his ego. He asked me such questions as how to reverse 1000 and get 0001 and wasn't satisfied with the several ways I gave because none of it were what he had in mind (which turned out to be storing them in a fucking array and printing them in reverse. That's printing not reversing you dung beetle). I kept my calm throughout but on the day of the final exam, he set quite a tough paper for a class of people who had already failed once. To his utter shock and dismay, I aced that too and I produced flawless code. This man who has an MTech from one of the most reputed colleges of my country then proceeded to tell me that he had to cut my marks because I had used more than one function when the question had asked for one function ( it never said only one). I lost my shit and pointed out that since I was the programmer, it was my wish how I coded. I also explained to him how repeating code is a bad practice and one should use functions to reduce redundancy and keep the code clean. Nevertheless, he lost his shit and he threatened me with consequences as apparently "I didn't know who I was messing with". I handed over the paper and stormed out of the class (though he called me back and tried to argue more with me. I apologized for losing my shit and left when he was done talking). I ended up getting a 'C'. Totally worth it.4
* Driving... Thinking about code.
* Walking... Thinking about code.
* Lying down... Thinking about code.
* Sitting down... Thinking about code.
* Eating... Thinking about code.
* Conversating... Thinking about code.
* Praying... Thinking about code.
* Partying... Thinking about code.
* Pooing... Thinking about code.
* Bathing... Thinking about code.
* Eyes closed... Thinking about code.
* Eyes open... Thinking about code.
Genie... I think you already know my wish.12
A few days ago someone posted a pic of an ESP8266 microcontroller, so it reminded me that I have one of those lying around with a board with a screen I built during summer, so I thought, why not making a devrant reader, and so here it is:
For now it can only read rants, posting is coming soon, the software keyboard is already implemented
We call it the thing (Accrocchio in italian)5
well, the microsoft surface that has been lying in a shelf and was used three times in the last year now only boots to bluescreen. you still get the full experience even though you barely use it.
A lot of online games (mainstream) tend to make me kind of angry or stressed. Lots of either blatantly stupid or negative players kill the fun.
A few days ago I've startet to see videos about "Among Us". It's on a big hype right now and their machmaking servers must be glowing.
Well, this game is fucking awesome and it makes me really happy! 😊
Nothing beats a 30 minute game of lying, betrayal, teamwork and good old 30'000 IQ big-brain detective work.
I think it's a great execise for remembering stuff.
You remember colors, who's said what and who faked or did which task. And the hardest part is, even if you fucking saw the killer, you have to present the facts in a way that people believe you.
Each round is unique and full of riddles.
Yeah, I just wanted to say: Fucking great game 😄3
I am really getting sick of recruiters contacting me with "great opportunities" then when I ask questions about the post they just give me the answers they think I want to hear. I know when you're lying because if you knew the answer you would have led with that. At least say you'll find out more and then give me a follow up response.
Recruiter: Would it be possible for you to deliver hacking training?
Me: You mean pentesting?
R: Yes, that.
Me: Well, what will it be used for? Breaking into peoples networks and spying on them?
R: Yes, they'll want it to be able to spy on people.
Me: Well, that's unethical, I'm only interested in defensive security practices.
R: Yes, they'll only want it for ethical reasons like defence and against bad guys.
Me: *dirtiest look I could muster*
I mean there's gullible and then there's what ever it is you think I am.2
Some mother fucker parked his car in my parking lot...and it's lying there for more than 2 weeks...10
If anyone has been keeping up with my data warehouse from hell stories, we're reaching the climax. Today I reached my breaking point and wrote a strongly worder email about the situation. I detailed 3 separate cases of violated referential integrity (this warehouse has no constraints) and a field pulling from THE WRONG FLIPPING TABLE. Each instance was detailed with the lying ER diagram, highlighted the violating key pairs, the dangers they posed, and how to fix it. Note that this is a financial document; a financial document with nondeterministic behavior because the previous contractors' laziness. I feel like the flipping harbinger of doom with a cardboard sign saying "the end is near" and keep having to self-validate that if I was to change anything about this code, **financial numbers would change**, names would swap, description codes would change, and because they're edge cases in a giant dataset, they'll be hard to find. My email included SQL queries returning values where integrity is violated 15+ times. There's legacy data just shoved in ignoring all constraints. There are misspellings where a new one was made instead of updating, leaving the pk the same.
Now I'd just put sorting and other algos, but the data is processed by a crystal report. It has no debugger. No analysis tools. 11 subreports. The thing takes an hour to run and 77k queries to the oracle backend. It's one of the most disgusting infrastructures I've ever seen. There's no other solution to this but to either move to a general programming language or get the contractor to fix the data warehouse. I feel like I've gotten nowhere trying to debug this for 2 months. Now that I've reached what's probably the root issue, the office beaucracy is resisting the idea of throwing out the fire hazard and keeping the good parts. The upper management wants to just install sprinklers, and I'm losing it.
Imagine asking your friends to help you rate your app on the google play store and instead of saying NO I DONT WANT TO RATE YOUR APPLICATION no... they decide to fuck with your mind.
I will rate it tomorrow. (she never rated it tomorrow nor the next couple of weeks later)
I will keep it in mind and rate it later :). (she never rated it later)
I rated it haha (less than 30 seconds later they deleted the rating)
Send me a link and I'll rate it (i send the link, they never respond or read my message again)
I dont have memory on my phone :) (because 13MB of memory is a lot of storage requirements but taking 1 million selfies of up to 25GB is completely fine)
I dont have memory on my phone what dont you understand :) x2 (this is the second girl)
Your trying to give me a virus?? No (i got blocked multiple times)
You want to hack me by making me install this application from the link that you sent me that leads to google play store? No (blocked)
Rate your app? Haha i dont care about it because it doesnt bring me any benefit only the fat cocks that fill my pussy up satisfy me and not ur app haha
Haha send me a link ill rate it (i send link, 8 hours later no reply or reading my message, i text her back if she had done it and im still put on ignore)
Notice how none of these people have said the 2 letter word: "no".
All of these 10 examples are based on a true story.
All of these 10 examples are different people.
Can it be
For all of you who are about to trash talk saying i am desperately trying to beg people to rate my app:
i know all of those people for a long time. But when it comes to asking (and not forcing) someone to do you a favor for free that takes no more than 30 seconds, no one seems to have 30 seconds of their free time. Dont get me wrong, some of my friends did politely rate it and left a review, even the people who i barely knew left a review and rated it, but the people with whom I was closer by, didnt.
In the beginning i used to not care about this at all. Then i started falling into depression because of it. I fell then into deep depression. Then i sunk so deep that i couldn't feel any emotions anymore so i laughed as an anti depressive mechanism whenever something depressing happened. Now i cant even laugh because i have no more energy. Now i actually leave man tears
The only thing more valuable than people, any materialistic thing, animals, coding and even money - is time....
why do you waste my time
if i ask you to do something that takes 30 seconds and you dont want to do it
why cant you just say no
why do you drag me
why do you say you're going to do it when you know you wont do it
what do you gain by unnecessarily lying to someone for such a small thing?
to someone who has been a good person to you?
do you feel superior?
is your ego bigger?
This experience has taught me that not even a human from the same blood can be trusted.
All of your are fucked up in the head in your own style and i am guilty of it too, all of us are.
But i have never seen the human evolution went from simplicity to overengineered complexitory bULLSHit where you have to lie to someone and waste hours, days, weeks, months and sometimes years of his time just because you dont want to say a 2 letter word, no.
But when that person becomes more successful than you and achieves higher status, Theen you have those 30 seconds of free time. All of you are fucking cynics. and i am so much overly disgusted by all of this fucking bullshit....
This experience has proven to me to simply focus on investing into myself and learn and improve myself and no one else. To not even bother asking even for a small kind of help, a feedback from my work because people don't have 30 seconds of their free time. That is all.13
Gotta love Linux!
Wanted to install Arch on my Rasperry PI yesterday, but don't have a cardreader on my PC. Still had an SD with a different distro (RasPlex) lying around. Popped that in, connected power and ethernet only, looked up the default SSH credentials and got to a blinking terminal on my desktop PC.
Well, how am I gonna format my microSD? Rasplex comes without fdisk, and I booted it from the only microSD slot.
Well, here we go - Extracted arch to a usb thumb drive, chrooted into it, switched microSD cards, partitioned and formatted it from the USB-Arch, installed Arch on it, chrooted from Arch to Arch (😁), set up drivers, network and ssh access, rebooted to my why-the-hell-not distro.
Sooooo I am not a fanboy. I do have my reservations when it comes to technology and whatever, but I live and let live and normally don't shit on stuff as long as it does not affect me or has any reasonable opportunity to affect others.
But my lead developer does, highly opinionated dude for a lot of shit (he ain't really my lead dev anymore in the sense of him being over me, i actually got promoted to a different department but have to continue working with him) and as such we sometimes go on some huuuuge rants regarding tech. With me, shit is simple man, you tell me you like something and I'll dig it, even if i don't necessarily dig it....i am pretty chill like that...ya dig?
Well the other day he was talking about how tvs like mine were too small for him, mine is a 55 inch, i don't think its small, it doesn't inconvenience me in any way really. But to his royal blindness shit is small.
I mentioned that I watch most of my shit lying down on my ipad pro, to were he starts talking massive amounts of shit about apple.
Now, as a previously hired and annoyed mobile developer, ios has a special place in my heart in which my only complaint about the platform was how xcode would fuck up from time to time. The languages were glorious(Obj C and swift) the cocoa apis were amazing(between ios and mac desktop....oooh la la) and the care that the apple store takes in not letting every other add infested garbage app to play a part in their store, the gloriousness of having your data secured as well as havinf applications compiled into the actual fucking operating system REALLY TOUCHES HOME WITH ME. ITS COOL IF IT AIN'T YOU, I AM TALKING ABOUT ME.
Oh. And ipads are smooth as fuck. This was something that I had to mention when he said that anything that I could do with my 1000+ dllr ipad could be done with his samsung table. Normally, I would be like "cool man" but diz doode insisted on making an android vs ios argument.
He insisted on me trying on his tablet. Boy it was the jankiest, laggiest shit I had laid hands on.......just like any other underpowered Android device. Don't get me wrong, my s9 works fucking amazing, but why in the name of heavens would you make an argument against a tablet whilst simultaneously using a piece of shit that doesn't even work properly? Are people really that delusional in their arguments that they would really be that wrong while still insisting on being right?13
So I'm using a temperature sensor to detect the air temperature in a box. I'm getting readings of about 225°C. Thinking that's weird I check the algorithm converting the input to celceius. Seems legit. Okay must be hardware, let's try resetting the sensor into the board. Turns out the readings weren't lying... Long story short, if you reverse the polarity of a temperature sensor you get a very powerful heater...5
Listening to music, lying facedown on my bed with my eyes closed. After a long day, I usually can't look at any electronic screens.
Still dealing with the web department and their finger pointing after several thousand errors logged.
SeniorWebDev: “Looks like there were 250 database timeout errors at 11:02AM. DBAs might want to take a look.”
I look at the actual exceptions being logged (bulk of the over 1,600 logged errors)..
“Object reference not set to an instance of an object.”
Then I looked the email timestamp…11:00AM. We received the email notification *before* the database timeout errors occurred.
I gather some facts…when the exceptions started, when they ended, and used the stack trace to find the code not checking for null (maybe 10 minutes of junior dev detective work). Send the data to the ‘powers that be’ and carried on with my daily tasks.
I attached what I found (not the actual code, it was changed to protect the innocent)
Couple of hours later another WebDev replied…
WebDev: “These errors look like a database connectivity issue between the web site and the saleitem data service. Appears the logging framework doesn’t allow us to log any information about the database connection.”
FRACK!!...that Fracking lying piece of frack! Our team is responsible for the logging framework. I was typing up my response (having to calm down) then about a minute later the head DBA replies …
DBA: “Do you have any evidence of this? Our logs show no connectivity issues. The logging framework does have the ability to log an extensive amount of data regarding the database transaction. Database name, server, login, command text, and parameter values. Everything we need to troubleshoot. This is the link to the documentation …. If you implement the one line of code to gather the data, it will go a long way in helping us debug performance and connectivity issue. Thank you.”
DBA sends me a skype message “You’re welcome :)”
Ahh..nice to see someone else fed up with their lying bull...stuff.
You ever can't figure out how to do something elegantly during the day, end up with a weird hack. But then when you are home and are lying on the couch browsing memes the perfect solution pops into your head?
Companies should give us thinking couches where you can slack off waiting for the idea.5
Personally I am starting to think that any development tools, resources and sites should not be allowed to use marketing dribble.
It should go
-> Land on home page
-> Hi, we are a realtime database cloud host
-> no you cannot host it yourself
-> here is code to speak to our servers
-> here is the cost
->now take it or go.
Something like that, and not
We provide clients with the leading cloud and hosted data solutions that can scale vertically and horizontally on and offline data management keeping people connected and saving kittens.
Fuck you show me one kitten you saved? Lying pieces of shit that do not want to just say hey this is what we have , this is ours, it may not be much but it is what we believe in and if you would like to use it here is how , thank you now move the fuck along our server can't handle so many concurrent connections.3
So i just had an interesting conversation.
View source images in comments
So some background. I used to do a lot of Minecraft development and server configuration. And Minecraft being made of mostly 12-year-olds they really don't pay very well. So I moved on from Minecraft but someone reached out for me to do their configuration for their server. (this was about a month ago) and I quoted them 40/hr because that's what I charge for my web dev work. So he promptly declined and I thought that was that. But tonight he messaged me and found a 5 month old post saying how I was looking to do free development work in order to get experience. And here is how the converstion when.
(His name is "Candy")
Trying to take advantage of me with your bullshit $40/hour claims
Which is outright laughable
”I am looking for a network to stay long-term with and help/see it grow into a bigger server. (I would expect pay later down the road if we work together on an ongoing basis)”
Quoting your MC-Market post.
What do you have to say for yourself? Trying to take advantage of people?
Going to say something else completely delusional or own up to the fact that you were trying to take advantage of me?
I already knew you were, but now I have the hard evidence.
As I am not a stupid person.
Not only did your friend lie, but you tried to take advantage of me, thinking I was stupid enough to fall for your $40/hour bullshit for basic configuration work. MineSaga charges $30.00 an hour on the high. Don’t even try to do the same shit you did to me to anyone else. It won’t work.
Me:I was interested in doing plugin development and learning so I offered my services for free so I could learn in a more real environment. I no longer do minecraft plugins rather I am a web developer and my rate is $40/hr I am good at configuration which is why i contacted you but I am not going to lower my rate because it is "simpler" work. Just like how you can higher a prostitute to wash your car but it would be cheaper to get the kid from around the block to do it. Also not sure what your end goal is here. I gave you my rate and you didn't agree with it. So you should just move on. Plus this is the minecraft world let me know when you get to the real world so you you can pay in big boy money.
So your configuration work for minecraft is $40/h as well?
did you not read my message?
"I am not going to lower my rate because it is "simpler" work."
Who were your most recent clients?
i'm not going to give you that information
Because you know you are lying to me with your crazy rates, and if you aren't, that means you have near to no clients.
Yet another lie.
keep telling yourself that buddy
Good luck getting any more clients.
I get more clients all the time
They just are not in your realm of your minecraft imagination where you can pay a developer 20$/hr
I just strongly disagree with the fact that you are charging $40/hour for configurative work
But why even contact me? Did you really think trying to "Call me out" was going to have me lower my rates or something.
Just get over it
I haven't called you out and overcharging like that to others in the minecraft realm for a significant gain in money for work that is not worth nearly that amount is absolutely delusional.
I would recommend you stop making up false assumptions
Me: What ever you say
I left it at that. There was some more stuff but it was not that interesting so i left it out6
Said jokingly to my dev lead yesterday: "or you could just use that VPN we have lying around lol"
The look on his face while saying: "v..pn?"
Like it was same mambo jambo from outer space written in Russian... Lol, this dude is so out of touch with tech :/4
I hate lying customers.
Today a customer opened a support ticket related to his website account. Apparently he is losing his session right after the login success.
I've debugged everything, checked all logs and couldn't reproduce it.
I know every bit of business logic on the website by heart.
The only explanation could be that his browser either doesn't allow cookies or expires them after page change.
So I asked him to check.
"Yes, cookies are allowed in my browser" he wrote.
Well... fuck me... I will change the code to put the session ID in the URL as well. If it works - and I'm 100% sure of that - I will personally mail him a collection of the finest turds.4
I need ideas.
What's the best use for several old, moderately crap laptops (<= 4GB RAM) I have lying around? I'm using one as a minecraft server because 3GB ram is enough and the Pi isn't, but past that, I'm pretty stuck. They all work, mostly, have CD drives and mostly free hard drives.25
Don't fake it until you make it if you can't pull it off.
A few times I encountered people lying about their skills. And then admit that they can't do it when it's too late. That just knocks the project timeline off!5
Alright lads here is the thing, have not been posting anything other than replies to things cuz I have been busy being miserable at school and dealing with work stuff.
Our manager left us back in February. Because she was leaving I decided that I wanted to try a different path and went on to become a programmer analyst for my institution, if anything I knew that it was going to be pretty boring work, but it came with nice monetary compensation and a foot in the door for other data science related jobs in the future. Thing is, the department head asked me to stay in the web technologies department because we had a lack of people there and hiring is hard as shit, we do not do remote jobs since our work usually requires a level of discretion and security. Thus I have been working in the web tech department since she left albeit with a different title since I aced the interview for the analyst position and the team there were more than happy to have me. I have done very few things for them, some reports here and there and mostly working directly with the DBA in some projects. One migration project would have costed my institution a total of 58k and we managed to save the cost by building the migration software ourselves.....honestly it was a fucking cake walk, if you had any doubts about the shaddyness of enterprise level applications regarding selling overpriced shit with different levels of complexity, keep them, enterprise is shaddy af indeed. But I digress.
I wrote the specification for the manager position along the previous manager, we had decided that the next candidate needed to be strong with development knowledge as well as other things as to properly understand and manage a software team, we made the academic requirement(fuck you, yes we did ask for academic requirements) to be either in the Computer Science/software engineering area or at least on the Business Administration side. We were willing to consider BA holders in exchange for having knowledge of the development process of different products and a complete understanding of what developers go through. NOT ONE SINGLE motherfucker was able to satisfy this, some of them were idiots that I knew from before that had ABSOLUTELY no business even considering applying to the position, the courage it took for some of these assholes to apply would have hurt their mothers, their God if they had one, and their country, they were just that fucking bad in their jobs as well as being overall shit people.
Then we had 1 candidate actually fall through the cracks enough to get an interview. My dude here was lying out of his ass through the interview process. According to him he had "lots of Laravel experience and experience managing Laravel projects" and mentioned repeatedly how it would be a technology that we should consider for our products. I was to interview him alongside the vice president of our institution due to the head of my department and the rest of the managers for I.T being on vacation leave all at the same bloody time.
Backstory before the interview:
Whilst I was going over the interview questions with the vice president literally offered me the job instead. I replied with honesty, reflecting how I did not originally wanted him but feeling that our institution was ready to settle on any candidate due to the lack of potentials. He was happy to do it since apparently both him and the HOD were expecting me to step up sooner or later. I was floored.
Regardless, out of kindness he wanted to go through the interview.
So, going back to the interview. As soon as the person in question referenced the framework I started to ask him about it, just simple questions, the first was "what are your thoughts on the Eloquent ORM? I am not too fond of it and want to know what you as a full time laravel dev think of it"
his reply: "I am sorry I am not too familiar with it, I don't know what that is" <--- I appreciated his honesty in this but thought it funny that someone would say that he was a Laravel developer whilst not knowing what an ORM was since you can't really get away from using it on the initial stages of learning about Laravel, maybe if one wanted to go through the hurdle of switching to something like doctrine...but even then, it was....odd.
So I met with the hod when he came back, he was stoked at the prospect of having me become the manager and I happily accepted the position. It will be hell, but I don't even need to hit the ground running since I have been the face of the department since ages. My team were ecstatic about it since we are all close friends and they have been following my directions without complaints(but the ocational eat a dick puto) for some time, we work well together and we are happy to finally have someone to stop the constant barrage that comes from people taking advantage of a missing manager.
Its gonna get good, its gonna get fun, and i am getting to see how shit goes.7
Guys, if you have an extra computer lying around, support for the cause by contributing your device as a resource to SETI:
If you discover something, the credit goes to you! If you are not happy, you can contribute to various other projects which are in need of your computation. Kindly consider.7
I got in bed early last night with a bad stomachache.
While I was lying there half asleep, it occurred to me that I could just set a breakpoint, and then the next time my stomach growled, I could inspect it to see what food had been passed in that was upsetting it...
Linkedin/Jura/Monster/[other job finding websites] should add a feature:
A button that reads "lying mofo or dumbass" on each job ad.
For those employers and recruiters who don't understand that neither a senior role nor any role that requires a PhD is classified as an "entry level".
Unfortunately there are so many such dumbfucks I can't blacklist all of them from my job search. 🤬18
My setup: AMD Phenom-2 1100T with fat cooler for silent PC, 16 GB ECC RAM, AMD Radeon HD-6850 passively cooled, WD Blue 1 TB HDD. One 22 inch monitor with 1650 x 1050.
The mouse is a bit broken because the click switch under the mouse wheel doesn't work anymore. The empty bottle in front of the PC is necessary for lying on the room light switch, or else it won't work. And the black/yellow tape is a fix for the worn out seat cover.
But the best, under the monitor, is the little green troll that serves as rubber duck.
Anyone else have trouble with real life common sense?
Yesterday Evening a dog chased my best mate's cat up a tree. Being the genius I am, I decided to climb after the adorable bugger. Fell from about 8-10ft onto concrete slabs on my back.
Main thing first: I got lucky, CTs and X-rays showed no lasting damage. I'm back home and safe now.
What got me was going through the hospital having to hear the story of how I fell out of a tree onto my back and head like an idiot... from medical person to medical person.
I was lying in the bed, thinking "I swear I'm competent!? Why do people trust me!?"
Does anyone else have any weird skill black spots, or common sense break downs?7
Too many people are such unreliable pieces of shit. I am tired of getting up and working with Charles Bukowski developers who think code is everything, teaching juniors who might be better off not learning this shit at all, and talking to managers who pretend to care more about your safety.
The lies you tell us. The lies you tell yourselves. I'm so tired of the lies and the hidden agendas. I'm tired of mistrusting people but at the same time, I can't fucking help it. Every goddamn time I think "this person's pretty cool", I find out that they are lying or hiding something. Same shit, different package. A decent person is almost too good to be true.
I understand that in a business setting, you can't always tell the truth but some lies are unnecessary. You don't have to be super friendly to someone you don't like, just deliver the fucking product and quit it with your "we are family" kind of bullshit. I don't understand why you make your lives harder and why you find it so hard to tell the truth.
I'm fucking disgusted. I don't want to work anymore. I don''t want to talk to anyone anymore. I just want to quit this fucking job and sleep in my room for weeks.
Everyone lies. Nothing makes sense. There's no fucking hope. Give up, you dreamy cunt.3
Why is source code so crappy? May career is not the longest, buy in my 8 years I talked to so many developers and every one told me how important quality, standards, tests and architecture are - but every codebase I've seen is lacking all of it. Everything is running on constant live support.
I don't get it. It is like I live in a world where everyone does know what has to be done, but no-one does it. I suspect it is because people are lazy, lying and won't say no but that's also not a world I want to live in.24
Is it too much to ask for companies in the current world to be.. oh I don't know.. honest and consistent?
If you advertise on your Job section: "We always give our candidates feedback, whether they got the job or not". Then, *****, give them feedback! I applied and they never got back to me. And no, that's not feedback.6
Customer:"Adjust my application so it stops automtically when it encounters a file that has already been processed".
I do the adjustments. Two days later I get a mail from that customer. I'm not lying: "Hey, my application stops when I try to reuse my files"... the people you sometimes have to put up with...4
Tried getting enough sleep for the Monday and failed miserably.
First, I made my kids washed, like usual, around 6pm. Then tried to put them to sleep. The younger one went to sleep, the older refused. Wanted to play, run, jump, sing and scream. After an half an hour his screaming woke up younger. Now I had two kids to put to sleep back again.
The younger is one year old and requires more attention, otherwise cries.
After serious fight the older was forced to sleep. He tried to jump over me, bite me, kick, hit, eat chocolate, wanted to pee, then jump, run and fight again. I ended up lying him forcibly in the bed, holding his hand by kind of a block, so that he couldn't move to much. Took 15 minutes, but he felt asleep. It was 22. Joys of having 3yo kid.
After more 30 minutes and a bottle of milk the 1yo was sleeping.
At 2am the older woke and cried. I woke, tried to make him calm, he pushed me away and went back to sleep. Now it's 3:40, my sleeping pill wore off, and I won't take another one, because I need to get up at six.
This is how you get a good night's sleep before having a busy week.11
For the last 4-5 months the boss hasn't paid our wages complete. Since then he has promised over and over that he will pay all that he owes us, and we (most of us, anyway, the smart ones already leave) like fools believed in him.
The boss still is lying to us, the same lies over and over (i think he believes them himself)
YOU FOOL, NOBODY BELIEVES YOUR LIES, SHOW ME THE MONEY. DAMMIT!
I'll leave the job and very posibly sue him at the end of this month. Took me long enough. I'm not a smart man...5
"Those who say 'it’s not personal, it’s just business' are lying. All business is personal, and the best business is very personal. " - Richard Lenz
I never used to lie. Unless it was absolutely necessary which was very rare.
But now, I can lie so easily.
It all started with those fake sick emails after entering coroorate. And now I have become a lying bastard.
I don’t like myself when I lie but the necessities have become frequent in corporate.
Fuck corporate man!
Fuck it with porcupine quills!11
I have a 4S I leave lying around and most apps are dogs on it or crash.
Not DevRant app, though. Pretty solid. Impressive job.10
For fucks sake
Will I really have to become the fucking PM around here so shit start being done properly?
We look like bunch of scared cockroaches doing random shit everyday and lying to our selves that we are gonna meet deadlines and produce quality software but the only shit we can produce is quality bug.1
Client: Please add feature x in "here"
Me: Adds feature x in "here"
Fast forward to QA
QA: Test for feature x failed. Feature was added in "here" but is not in "there"
Me: There was no request to add x in "there"
Client: Feature x was already supposed to be in "there", you might have removed it.
Me: *Checks file where feature would be added.
* Git blame show no changes since received we the project (one major release back)
Lying cunt. I'm sick of your literally incomprehensible tasks giving government fucks, speak human language not overhead driven bureaucracy-jargon3
After two interviews at same company,.. I'll just cut to the email and my response to them..
Company X: "...blah blah blaaah, sorry but unfortunately, we decided to move forward with a candidate that we see fit for this role. Thank you for your interest and interviewing at X company."
My reply: "....don't be sorry. Fortunately, I have already accepted an offer where I see my skills fit at an even higher level at a company."
I was lying. I didn't have an offer yet. Just had to let them feel a little regret. 😂😁1
A question arose in our office today and I can't stop thinking about it:
If you imagine your life as a file lying somewhere, being steadily changed and expanded - of which filetype would it be and why?8
Job interview in an hour while depressed. And I‘m not ready for the thought of “lying” on how great I am if i don’t feel like it. It feels so wrong.11
Feeling pretty accomplished for someone who did no "work" today lol. I needed to work on side gigs but instead I:
1) Factory reset a 2011 Macbook Pro I'm selling and reinstalled Mojave using a patch (this laptop is officially unsupported by Mojave as of June).
2) Migrated all personal files from my windows desktop to my NAS. I'm turning this computer into a gaming rig now that I exclusively use my 2017 Macbook Pro for development.
3) Setup RDP from my macbook to my desktop.
4) Fixed registry errors and deleted junk apps off my desktop.
5) Erased and formatted all USB drives I had lying around.
6) Packaged up an old Xbox One for my brother-in-law which will get mailed tomorrow (included a few USBs for him since I rarely use'em).
7) Tested streaming my Xbox One X from my PC but it's laggy as F (both are wired, have static internal IPs, and use my router for DNS...it's just the app I guess).
8) Scored a like-new Scuf Vantage for my PS4 for $140 (the guy who was selling it paid $214 a month ago lol). I traded my spare Xbox One S for a PS4 slim and in an attempt to get used to it, I got this controller with thumbsticks in the same position as Xbox's.
9) Fixed and updated my Synergy app (mouse/keyboard sharing - I can use PBP on my 38" LG ultrawide and it's fairly seamless going between them).
10) Cloned a buddy's repo and set the project up to work locally.
11) Starting to get some work done while watching the Vikings game.1
My last day at my current company and damn, I couldn‘t be happier. Consulting was the worst decision I ever made and from tomorrow on I‘ll be free.
No more lying to clients, no more pushing of horrible products, no more silence towards problems because they didn‘t pay for a more expensive service.
I can finally stop hating myself for my job!4
House search has never been as painful as 2021. Not only the websites are shit at stopping agencies from outright lying on their websites, but also they can't even give you a quicker browsing experience. All the click click clicks just to view one fucking option. Duplicate advertises, photos from "a similar apartment", no 3D showing, no blueprints, etc. , and all in all, awful experience all around that nobody cares to fix. 😒8
Ubuntu is a dumb piece of shit with so many bugs lying around, especially when you try to get an alternative to Unity or Gnome.
Windows does have bugs too, but at least I don't run into six new bugs everyday which are so bad I can't even work.5
This is not really the reason I got these parts, but I just had them lying around and have been following the project for some time... so why not? Haha. I was also thinking it might be cool to set these up to auto-disrupt known AP names that would be issued by companies most responsible for the dismantling of Net Neutrality. Like just make them in a dirt cheap throwie form-factor and let the companies deal with pissed off customers for a few days until the battery dies (thinking the little generic LiPo’s that cheap quadcopters use would give a few days if attacking sporadically and using the ESP’s sleep function). Just riffing here... ;P ;D2
Conversation yesterday (senior dev and the mgr)..
SeniorDev: "Yea, I told Ken when using the service, pass the JSON string and serialize to their object. JSON eliminates the data contract mismatch errors they keep running into."
Mgr: "That sounds really familiar. Didn't we do this before?"
SeniorDev: "Hmmm...no. I doubt anyone has done this before."
Me: "Yea, our business tier processor handled transactions via XML. It allowed the client and server to process business objects regardless of platform. Partners using Perl,
clients using Delphi, website using .aspx, and our SQLServer broker even used it."
Mgr: "Oh yea...why did we stop using it?"
Me: "WCF. Remember, the new dev manager at the time and his team broke up the business processor into individual WCF services."
Mgr: "Boy, that was a crap fest. We're still fighting bugs from the mobile devices. Can't wait until we migrate everything to REST."
SeniorDev: "Yea, that was such a -bleep-ing joke."
Me: "You were on Jake's team at the time. You were the primary developer in the re-write process saying passing strings around wasn't the way true object-oriented developers write code.
So it's OK now because the string is in JSON format or because using a JSON string your idea?"
SeniorDev turns around in his desk and puts his headphones back on.
That's right you lying SOB...I remember exactly the level of personal attacks you spewed on me and other developers behind our backs for using XML as the message format.
Keep your fat ass in your seat and shut the hell up.3
We need more cool stuff to put in our profile pic
Like chainsaw our skull on the desk
Shotgun lying on the ground
Quad-copper hovering on top
You know what I mean3
I was working late one day and a "dumb" co-worker and another co-worker who work later than me were both there. "Dumb" co-worker was a few feet from me and the other co-worker didn't know I was working late that day. So she comes out of the break room and says "Oh, Team Manager, you're still here?"
I jokingly say "No, I left!"
Honest to god, "dumb" co-worker jumps out of her seat and says "HE'S LYING, HE'S STILL HERE."4
Lying in my bed, and watching Darling in the FRANXX...
A whole weekend long...
I dont regret anything.4
Lying to your misses about the purchase price of a new laptop - protecting the relationship or just plain wrong?6
So Twitter managed to break its content censorship system so hard that when you tweet the word "Memphis" it insta-bans your account for 12h.
This is hilarious. I had an account lying around and sure thing, within a single page refresh I was banned for mentioning a city in the US.
In case anyone wonders, writing "Memphis" as ban repeal comment seems to have no effect ;)5
If anyone has an object (Domino's) recognition program lying around you might be able to get free pizzas for life.
Proudest bug squash? Probably the time I fixed a few bugs by accident when I was just trying to clean up an ex-coworker's messy code.
So I used to work with a guy who was not a very good programmer. It's hard to explain exactly why other than to say that he never really grew out of the college mindset. He never really learned the importance of critical thinking and problem-solving. He did everything "by the book" to a point where if he ran into an issue that had no textbook solution, he would spin his wheels for weeks while constantly lying to us about his progress until one of us would finally notice and take the problem off his plate. His code was technically functional, but still very bad.
Quick Background: Our team is responsible for deploying and maintaining cloud resources in AWS and Azure. We do this with Terraform, a domain-specific language that lets us define all our infrastructure as code and automate everything.
After he left, I took on the work to modify some of the Terraform code he'd written. In the process, I discovered what I like to call "The Übervariable", a map of at least 80 items, many of them completely unrelated to each other, which were all referenced exactly once in his code and never modified. Basically it was a dynamic collection variable holding 80+ constants. Some of these constants were only used in mathematical expressions with multiple other constants from the same data structure, resulting in a new value that would also be a constant. Some of the constants were identical values that could never possibly differ, but were still stored as separate values in the map.
After I made the modification I was supposed to make, I decided I was so bothered by his shitty code that I would spend some extra time fixing and optimizing it. The end result: one week of work, 800 lines of code deleted, 30 lines added, and a massive increase in efficiency. I deleted the Übervariable and hardcoded most of the values it contained since there was no possible reason for any of them to change in the future. In the process, I accidentally fixed three bugs that had been printing ominous-sounding warnings to the console whenever the code was run.
I have a lot of stories about this guy. I should post some more of them eventually.2
I was 8 and I was at grandpa house and he had computer lying at ground while it was opened.
It looked cool to me so I asked him to learn me and he did learn me the total basics then when I got home I downloaded C compiler (damn I don't know which one it was) and well learnt total basics of C and made few simple programs.
And I continued to learn even when I was 10 made couple of basic apps (calculator and that kind of stuff) and I continued learning and well after 10 years here I am.
Almost18 years boy that knows C pretty good (10 years experience)
While that 10 years I started to learn C++ too and Java too but I still learnt C the most probably cause I never stoped learning it.
4 years back I found out about SDL and learnt it damn it was cool now I want to learn OpenGL(Yea I'm learning it kinda late but oh well)2
Finally made good use of my RPi and setup pi-hole on it. After a painful 4hour long dist-upgrade and picking the right filters it is working like a charm. Why didn't I make this work earlier.
I've also wrote a little script which queries the api and displays different info on the AMOLED screen that was lying around unused for some time.
In case you are interested (from left to right and bottom), the traffic in the last 10 minutes with the max value on a graph, the most active clients query and blocked ratio as lines relative to the top one, and an overview of the total queries/ blocked queries and total clients.
At least I've finally spent a weekend useful not just playing games and watching anime.5
Installed windows 10 in a virtual machine, fresh install no updates.
"Windows, what are you playing at we both know you are lying, how many updates do you have?"
"Away and install them NOW so that you don't reboot on me when I'm doing something important, ok?"
Remember, windows update rules should be like bathroom breaks on a long car journey, everyone goes before you leave and only when you stop for gas
does anyone know if theres a way (browser / api / mobile) lying around on devRant to retreive the list of users you have subscribed to?
it looks like someone has a half done project to finish 😢5
I'm quite a vengeful person, I'm sure I get the wrong end of the stick sometimes to.
In the last few years of my life I've been trying to not act and "be mature" about the situation.
There's still times I fall of the wagon but generally I have shrugged it off...
But do you know how I feel like now!? That I've been walked all over people are taking me for granted. People think they can get away with lying and messing me about.
Quite honestly I don't know how to act your always meant to rise above the situation. When all I can think of is how I could fuck up the thing they did.
And people go well just protect yourself but that means I'm not open and honest myself and that's what I fucking hate to begin with!
Today I'm feeling vengeful because a client didn't pay until the last second. They wanted the website for next to nothing. And took a year to pay. Now they have gone and paid a tonne on a new site ! Because they went well what you did was shit "effectively"
Granted it was but you don't spend a few hundred quid and expect to get everything. I gave them what they paid for.
Everyone is expecting something for nothing 🙄 I get that's just the life of companies directors
But it pisses me off I try to do everything truthfully on the up an up and they would prefer a group of liars
Oh front page of Google yes we can do that for free
Oh yes the greatest animation look!
😤 And I'm meant to sit here and be like yeah that's cool. I mean at this point what reason do I have to be open and honest if shit stains like that exist!
What pisses me off more is that I'm trying to rise above. I don't think I should I think I should ruin their fucking day and be done with it. I have the capabilities.... But I know "it ain't legal"
Then people go on about well if you don't like the rules help them get changed ...
I've tried the political route they are all far worse 😐 they are ignorant cunts. That's the truth! I can't stand to be around half of them 🙄
So here I am ranting to not fuck up someone's day , trying to rise above 😔
Heh promotion? I only get fake promotion..
For two years, I was doing so many *free* overtime, manager is a big liar, he said that it will he considered on the yearly evaluation.. cool, the thing is there is no evaluation at all, just lying and lying.
Few months ago I took a vacation of 1 month (I am expatriate so I get one vacation per year, my home town is too far..) I talked to tye manager about salary taise and he said absolutely we will talk after I get back..
He called me during my vacation to do some urgent (as always) work, I worked about 5 days, and for free.
After I get back to work, he was angry about my *attitude* that I wasn't available more time.. oh and there was no fucking raise. always lying..
In this country, if you're an expatriate so you can travel outside the country without the validation of the employer (yeah like that) and the notes period is about 3 months, what makes very hard to find another job, no one will wait for 3 months, unless you vanish during a vacation.
So, why didn't I gave my resignation? well, life is hard when you have unemployed wife and a little baby, and the pay is, let's say OK comparing to costs here.
I am charged to learn and work with another language and framework, and when I asked for a raise they said no, so I will stop working in this language and let's see..
The problem is that other employees in thus company are literally bitches, they don't say no to anything, so I am the special guy here who does not a blowjob..
So, what do I do? I am hunting for a new job since a while but no luck.5
Lying recruiters really make my shit itch.
A couple of months ago a recruiter got in touch on linked in as he’d seen my cv on Indeed or somewhere.
He asks what I’m looking for and I tell him I want to move to a more development focused role rather than mosh mash of support, admin and Dev that I do at the moment.
He’s says he’s got just the role at a fairly local software company, and that the role would be at least 90% development blah blah blah.
So I set up a video call, and it immediately becomes clear that they want someone to do support/admin who might get to do a tiny bit of dev (they mainly asked about my experience with HTML) and I could tell they lost interest when I said I was more interested in backend development etc.
They didn’t want to progress the application as I wasn’t what they were looking for, which is fair enough they weren’t what I was looking for either.
But, do recruiters intentionally set out to lie to applicants about what a job is/entails or do they either get duff info from clients, or just not understand the job specs they are given?
I mean it wasted my lunch break (not including calls with the recruiter) and an hour of time for the CEO and Dev from the company.12
Fucking telecom and their shady ways of providing "service". Don't even need to consider paying for porn sites when my isp comes along with its own, overpriced service to fuck a customer in every way possible.
Probably other providers as well, but for now I'm fucking pissed at them because they already scammed my grandmother twice, when it comes to internet speed, probably because they thought she wouldn't notice either way.
My grandmother's residence can receive up too 200mbps, so she got a plan according to that. Installation of the router was included as a one time fee.
This is where they first scammed her, imo. They installed a router, that can route 100mbps at max. At first I though she got a plan for that speed.
An elder telecom technician, who was investing a completely irrelevant issue, switched it out for one than can handle uo to 1tbps. He had no obligation to do so and he didn't charge anything.
Seriously, probs to that one guy. He openly stated that telecoms pulls off this scam and switched it for free, since they have many of routers lying around anyways (I wonder why 🤔🤔🤔)
Anyways, guy switched out the router and BAMM! from ~80mbps to ~170, iirc.
Fast forward a couple of months I notice internet speed is capped out at 76mpbs. Capped out way to perfectly, to just blame the cable. But obviously the guys over at customer support do exactly that.
Calls telecom: "yeah, your contact only goes up to 100, 76 because of the cable. You need to pay extra to get up to 176".
Excuse me, what the fuck did you just say, shit nugget? We should pay extra for something you contest from us?
Yo, Mister ChromosomOverflow, don't think that relaying the responsibility to another number to call will put you out of the fucking shit you tried to pull off.
Edit: The contract states up to 1000, 200 or 100mpbs download depending on what the cables allow and in case of 200 there's 100mbps upload, but we also get capped out there at 20. I wish these fucker one gang rape per non-received mpbs2
Found it lying around. Googled it, and it seems people avoid it, so I started using it all over the place(s). goto b
no other places to goto exit
Yes, it does require some thought to avoid confusion, and some pull requests get declined, but... Helps me alot when I have goto a
To my client who wants a two-column formatted email built with tables in Constant Contact to appear in the same two-column format on mobile devices: You're lying when you say your previous developer achieved a legible, mobile, tiny screen email this way. I know because I can see the previous email formatting. In fact, I cloned that exact email and merely swapped out the content. You really do not understand what you're asking for.4
Tfw when you're lying down falling asleep and realize you didn't commit your work but you turned off your computer.3
I'm surprised a lot of people still don't realize that passphrases are way better than an 8 character gibberish word.
I've even tried convincing a friend and he thought I was lying.
(insert relevant xkcd link)-->https://xkcd.com/936/
Show your support for the FOSS community and help to save it from lying politicians
All kinds of support is very much appreciated.
A few days after the vacation, daddy (me) finally finished copying all the photos from the digital camera to the big external hard drive. Left it lying in the living room, in the corner where all the tech stuff frequently lies. In come my boys, and I'm not sure why, they start plugging power supplies around. Unfortunately the one from the laptop fit into the hole on the external disk, but had a different (higher) voltage. Result: 1 fried hard drive, containing all the baby photos and videos of said boys up that time.
I still believe that it's only the circuit board that is fried, and the data is still all there. I still have the hope to find a used disk, replace the board and all will be back.5
Do you get filled with anxiety and mental anguish when asked for your availability for a technical interview, knowing you’ve spent all your time recently programming and not working on algorithms/data structures and so you’re terribly unprepared but have no idea what the acceptable amount of time to schedule out without seeming like you’re incompetent is?
....me neither. (She says, lying)8
I'm feeling empty. All my friends and roomates went home. But I stayed in hostel. I haven't touched my laptop from last 3 days. I'm just lying on bed staring at ceiling. I'm not even in a relationship, so I call my mother everyday to get the feeling of being loved.
This quarantine is strange. First few days I spent my time playing video games, watching Netflix, laughing at memes. But Now I'm feeling empty. Very strange thoughts are now occupying my mind. I'm sleeping 10+ hrs, and staring at ceiling or outside window most of the time. My room is a mess. Forget washing hands, I don't even feel like standing up to switch on lights.
I'm not saying I feel sad or depressed, I just feel very strange.20
In this world where everyone is a lying son of a bitch, being truthful is hot as fuck. Be hot as fuck!4
I get punched in the face by my phone (free falling on my face) so often that I should start suing the mofo for physical damages.
Like, what is wrong with my muscles? Why can't I keep a goddamn phone at a goddamn safe distance and type without goddamn dropping it while lying down? 😠😠16
I never felt this satisfied in my entire life,
So I was working on an open-source org where people can come and read books online for free. But they were facing the challenge of making books text selectable with the mouse pointer. But the problem was that their website renders scanned images of the books so it is impossible to select text from it.
So I solved this problem by building a small prototype that could do it. All of the books that they have in their database are having XML files associated with them which contains the coordinates of each word. So the logic was simple - select a rectangular region to pass its coordinates and check whether the coordinates of a word are lying in that rectangular region or not and display them. This trick is helpful because most of the OCR generates a similar XML file.
So if you wish to use this prototype for your own projects - you can check my GitHub repository https://github.com/ishank-dev/...
please star it if you like.
I don't get why people set their alarms every 5 minutes, instead of every minute with 5 minute snooze... It's waking up or lying around and getting angry at your phone that way16
So there are consequences to being an experimenter. Currently trying to develop my own smarthome, and last night, I was fixing up some lights. Just soldered some wires together, and hung it up by the outlet on the wall. And it worked!
But I didn't want it to just hang, so I moved it around a bit. And obviously because of my shitty soldering job, not really insulating anything, I created a short circuit, sparks everywhere, and blew a fuse in the electrical box. No problem, I'll just replace the fuse.. Except I didn't have any lying around, and it was 1am...
So I had to get up at 8am when the stores opened, and buy some fuses. Couldn't fall asleep again, so I started cleaning my apartment (I've possibly gone crazy from the electrical shock), and now I'm in my 3:30pm till midnight shift...3
I think I might need to visit the doctor soon.
I just can't get hungry and if I do try and eat I feel like shit not even 10 minutes after. Only after many hours of going by without eating do i really feel hunger and can eat without my stomach wanting to kill myself.
Yesterday for example. Ate at around 1 o clock (without being hungry) and not even 5 mins later i was lying down in my couch feeling like absolute shit.
Didn't eat anything throughout the rest of the day and today I am feeling like I could eat an entire horse by myself.
I don't know what is happening to me. I am dropping pounds like crazy and been feeling super tired. Really creeped out at what the doctor might say about why this is happening.
I would like to think that is stress and nothing more.14
So for a while I have wanted to build a raspberry pi cluster. In the spirit of shia labeouf I got started last saturday.
I had two pies lying around so I figured I'd run some experiments before I invested in a lot of hardware. After about a day I had turned the two pies into a shared cluster when disaster struck....
I had completely ignored the fact that you cannot run 32 or 64bit software on an arm processor (I know... I'm a java developer). So when I booted my service and the load balancer, I found that nothing worked. So pretty bumbed out, I quit the project.
Later that day I found a crazy guy who had bought a batch of 400 small form factor PSUs (300W) and internally I laughed at him a little. I mean, who's gonna sell 300W irregular power supplies. Then, just as I was about to go to bed I found this guy, he was selling from a batch of CPU-onboard motherboard for 10 bucks each and everything clicked!
I did some quick calculations and decided I could probably gather enough cash to get: 10 motherboards, 10 2GB ram dimms, 10 Sata disks and 14 PSU (in case some fail) and some misc hardware for networking and such.
So... Long story short, I am going to build a cluster computer, the first version is going to have 10 nodes and I am waiting for delivery right now!12
Two types of men in this world
The ones admitting to themselves they need a tomboy gf and the ones lying to themselves20
I’m really struggling to see WHY IN THE HELL it was necessary to delete my FUCKING NETWORK PROFILES to update this FRUIT FUCKED ALUMINUM SHIT BOX!
How did they test this and be like, oh, yea, you can’t connect automatically to ANY of the WiFi networks you have saved, because we deleted all the network profiles. That is acceptable, it won’t cause anyone any real problems.
Sure you need to update some shit. But why are you even touching that part of the disk? Damn you filthy lying fruit fuckers!
My programming desk created from stuff lying in office.
Under pizza boxes is old not working coffe machine2
2 hour meeting to brainstorm ideas to improve our system health monitoring (logging, alerting, monitoring, and metrics)
Never got past the alerting part. Piss poor excuses for human being managers kept 'blaming' our logging infrastructure for allowing them to log exceptions as 'Warnings', purposely by-passing the alerting system.
Then the d-head tried to 'educate' everyone the difference between error and exception …frack-wad…the difference isn't philosophical…shut up.
The B manager kept referring to our old logging system (like we stopped using it 5 years ago) and if it were written correctly, the legacy code would be easier to migrate. Fracking lying B….shut the frack up.
The fracking idiots then wanted to add direct-bypass of the alerting system (I purposely made the code to bypass alerting painful to write)
Mgr1: "The only way this will work is if you, by default, allow errors to bypass the alerting system. When all of our code is migrated, we'll change a config or something to enable alerting. That shouldn't be too hard."
Me: "Not going to happen. I made by-passing the alert system painful on purpose. If I make it easy, you'll never go back and change code."
Mgr2: "Oh, yes we will. Just mark that method as obsolete. That way, it will force us to fix the code."
Me: "The by-pass method is already obsolete and the teams are already ignoring the build warnings."
Mgr1: "No, that is not correct. We have a process to fix all build warnings related to obsolete methods."
Mgr2: "Yes. It won't be like the old system. We just never had time to go back and fix that code."
Me: "The method has been obsolete for almost a year. If your teams haven't fixed their code by now, it's not going to be fixed."
Mgr1: "You're expecting everything to be changed in one day. Our code base is way too big and there are too many changes to make. All we are asking for is a simple change that will give us the time we need to make the system better. We all want to make the system better…right?"
Me: "We made the changes to the core system over two years ago, and we had this same conversation, remember? If your team hasn't made any changes by now, they aren't going to. The only way they will change code to the new standard is if we make the old way painful. Sorry, that's the truth."
Mgr2: "Why did we make changes to the logging system? Why weren't any of us involved? If there were going to be all these changes, our team should have been part of the process."
Me: "You were and declined every meeting and every attempt to include your area. Considering the massive amount of infrastructure changes there was zero code changes required by your team. The new system simply worked. You can't take advantage of the new features which is why we're here today. I'm here to offer my help in any way I can with the transition."
Mgr1: "The new logging doesn't support logging of the different web page areas. Until you can make that change, we can't begin changing our code."
Me: "Logging properties is just a name+value pair dictionary. All you need to do is standardize on a name and how you add it to the collection."
Mgr2: "So, it's not a standard field? How difficult would it be to change the core assembly? This has to be standard across all our areas and shouldn't be up to the developers to type in anything they want."
- Frack wads smile and nod to each other like fracking chickens in a feeding frenzy
Me: "It can, but what will you call this property? What controls its value?"
- The look I got from both the d-bags I could tell a blood vessel popped.
Mgr1: "Oh…um….I don't know…Area? Yea … Area."
Mgr2: "Um…that's not specific enough. How about Page?"
Mgr1: "Well, pages can cross different areas, and areas cross different pages…what do you think?"
Me: "Don't know, don't care. It's up to you. I just need a name."
Mgr2: "Modules! Our MVC framework is broken up in Modules."
DevMgr: "We already have a field for Module. It's how we're segmenting the different business processes"
Mgr1: "Doesn't matter, we'll come up with a name later. Until then, we won't make any changes until there is a name."
DevMgr: "So what did we accomplish?"
Me: "That we need to review the web's logging and alerting process and make sure we're capturing errors being hidden as warnings."
Mgr1: "Nooo….we didn't accomplish anything. This meeting had no agenda and no purpose. We should have been included in the logging process changes from day one."
Mgr2: "I agree, I'm not sure why we're here"
Me: "This was a brainstorming meeting as listed in the agenda. We've accomplished 2 of the 4 items. I think we've established your commitment to making the system better. Thank you all for coming."
- Mgr1 and 2 left without looking at me or saying a word.1
The temporary friends you meet in "Among Us" makes the game even more charming. Many players are overly aggressive assholes then you meet that one player who's into the childish shit you are into. Hiding behind a box, standing on top of each other, celebrating with party or flamingo hats then boom, one of you disconnects.
CallMeKevin had three episodes where he always had that one random homie. He didn't find them ever again. There was a time he was an impostor and he proved it to that same "friend" he just met in that lobby a few minutes ago by getting into a vent in front of him. In every emergency meeting, the guy vouched for his innocence and the impostors won even though the homie was a crewmate.
I'm rambling. I just like how the game was designed. Of course, there are far more people who lose their shit for someone lying when that's literally what the game is about. Users will always be dumb no matter what.5
Got a couple of Raspberry Pi (Pies?) lying around.
What’s the coolest thing you have used a Pi for?17
Lying in bed and thinking about negative things over and over is quite self destructive it seems.
So if you do that, please don't do as I do and get out of bed. Don't let it turn you into a slob. Don't let it haunt you through your day.2
New coffee machines at work. Real beans! What's the equivalent of the Ballmer Peak for Caffeine? Posting this at 4.04am, lying awake in bed and not coding, I'm probably past it.. sleep not found2
Vacation is almost over. Checking my work mail I realised our coding standards updated. Comment requirements on variables now. I would have argued against it. That's fucked up overkill. But I was lying in the sun. That's just an excuse for bad naming. And our coding convention did not forbid us to add a single comment when there was a special circumstance for that.
I just should not take vacation. But now I have to comply. That's what I am going to do, but that pisses me off.1
Important memos to future self:
If the specs the client gave you seem written by a confused pre-teen, run.
If the client says something like "this can't possibly take THAT long", run.
If the client can't pay you enough, but reassures that (in return) he won't stress you and let you work in peace without imposing deadlines: he's lying, run.
If he politely asks to do something but then when you say no he keeps insisting, Don't. Give. In. Ever.
If the project seems shitty and not likely to have success, but hey, seems also simple and easy: it's not. But it's shitty anyways.
And on top of all: trust your fucking guts, you've been right tons of times by now. You didn't want to do this but you forced yourself, because "it's still an opportunity" and stupid slogans like that. Never again.5
Full stack developers are myth . Anyone who claims he is expert in both domains. He is lying. he would be implementing one side crappy solution and showing off that I developed everything from scratch. Tell him you are from monolithic era. You no longer exist. You are doing both side crappy solution go back to school and focus on one thing and come back with one thing which you can do properly24
Right,i consider myself a pretty damn good dev... I can back up everything I say to prove that I'm right on not lying to clients
But I see all these devs who do lie... Who withold data from clients cause it's not great.
And I go to clients and prove that they are lying not doing it right.
But I know saying to them... Oi your current devs are shit fire them ... Isn't a good way to get them as a client
Me and my company are open and honest ... we go all out on all of our projects. I work nonstop. It is seriously baffling the kind of developers are out there and how bad they can be I'm... Seriously just.... Urgh 😖
How should I go about talking to clients without going ... Fire them quick or saying that in a ... More humble respectful way...
I need more clients ... To survive and I don't mind coming across as a dick as long as they understand what's going on and that they are people ripped off by these asshole devs5
Can we collectively as an industry just calm down a little and stop lying to ourselves in a misguided attempt to inflate our sense of purpose...
I just stumbled upon a job listing for a WordPress developer position that described it as "helping solve the big problems of the day". Seriously?! Let's stop and get real you're probably just building themes. Maybe a plugin or two. So just relax and accept you're just another web developer building yet another 💩site you're not solving "the big problems"...
... Then again it IS WordPress...4
Me: *opens devTools*
Firefox: yea bro lemme just ..uh.. hmm yeah so this is the css for the element, see?
Me: this makes no sense, why would I ever do that?
Firefox: also you can't have width on an anchor tag. I can't put that rule into effect
Me: I didn't put any width on your inline element, you sure about that?
Firefox: yea try using display: inline-block
Me: No. I'll just delete that. *checks file*
Me: Maybe that line is wrong because IT DOES NOT FUCKING EXIST!
What is this shit? I just restarted you! What else do you need, a reinstall? Drink too much over the holidays?
It's like the css editor has become a shallow tray with rules on it, and as soon as you bump it a little everything spills over and then Firefox just thinks oops, I've got this font-size: 200% lying around, lemme stick this into the hr tag which makes sense because THERE CAN'T BE ANY TEXT IN IT.9
I like lying in the dark with my laptop with keyboard backlight enabled just to look at the keyboard.4
So it turns out I was interviewing for a senior role, when in fact I'm looking for a junior-mid role.
Two days ago I had a bad feeling creep up on me when the HR interviewer mentioned to me that they were looking to fill a senior role. I should have interjected. Instead, I stupidly asked the recruiter after passing the HR interview. He answered that the company would also take a mid-level developer and he thinks that I have a good chance. In retrospective, I'm not sure on what basis he made the judgement call.
I had the technical interview today and didn't get the job as I expected. But the same recruiter told me that the company said they'd take me for an intermediate role in the future, but I didn't make it for the senior role.
Can I take that as "you're not technically sound enough" put in a nicer way to soften the blow? But by the company or the recruiter? Or would they actually consider me for a mid-level role in the future? Who is lying or not lying?
Steam off my head now. Thanks for reading my rant.
Context: I'm still transitioning from another field and barely had one year of web development experience so far, half of which was from where I just learned to hack stuff together. I'm now going to focus on landing an internship or a junior role, without going through recruiters since I'd be waste of their time.15
Finally got few cables and now I can connect my laptop and even my cubietruck (device llike rasp) to the crt TV which was lying waste. Thinking to provide cast service to use it to watch movies. I know the resolution will be poor up but still with a try ☺️2
My Boss Abuses me, should I leave my job?
I overheard this tidbit on a bus recently. Okay I'm lying. But in the great spans of
time I've spent reading "dear annie" type articles, many involving how often my meth head step dads beat me while growing up, or in turn how often *I* beat me (oh yeah)..I've come across this in one form another, this, and other dumbfuck questions from the stuttering meek and halfhearted.
They say there are no dumb questions. Well, like that guy who smoked too much weed and
asked "what is the sound of one hand clapping?" (fap fap fap), there are in fact dumb questions.The world is overflowing with them, like a clogged shitter full of tacobell and glitter covered brown gutter wisdom. And it smells like roses, if roses smelled like shit.
Questions like "How do I make sure my cats don't feel lonely once I have my first child?"
I don't know, they're fucking cats. Did you even google this before asking?
"How to make spaghetti?"
Really, is this question written by a bot?
All of them and none of them. Welcome to hell.
"Whats your favorite color?"
My answer: I'm not five years old any more. And obviously you are. Why are you on this site instead of eating crayons at daycare?
Yes indeed, this and many more dumbfuck questions await you and can be found on the preeminent quora, amongst other sites.
A place, which censored an eminently reasonable answer of mine (I was totally not being a shithead btw).
I responded in kind by removing a whole mess of long form answers of mine.
What I have learned from the experience is this: Humanity is greatly comprised of many people who, having no brains to speak of, wander aimlessly like beasts of the field, glass eyed and slack jawed, in search of a savior. But their savior came a long time ago, once, and many times before. An engineer, or programmer, or perhaps in another reincarnation a guy parting a sea of koolaid after the local ruler swindled his peeps out of another payment for moving some heavy ass stone blocks, but I digress.
And in response to peoples worries, anxieties, everyday problems and concerns, every one of these would be wiseman, every one of these saviors, leaders, and great men spoke these magic words which resonate now down through the ages like the voice of reason and providence:
"Read the FUCKING manual."
"And don't bother me again asshole." (well this last bit is all me, but I'm sure others said it too.)2
I choose to believe performance self assessments are useful. Not for, like, my actual job, but they keep me grounded. Nothing like seeing your entire body of work for a year summed up in 30 to 40 bullet points to deflate your ego. Also it gives me a chance to work on my skills in what some of you might consider "lying" though I consider it more along the lines of "creative truth telling" and "having a loose grasp on reality".
No, that Nigerian prince is not real and it is a scam, and no, I am not jealous and I don't envy you, you know what, it is totally legit ... I was lying ...
I've alway pronounced it sequel but everyone I know swears it's SQL, so I say that now to fit in.
I feel like a spy, lying to my closest friends everyday...2
People talk about hacking like, "I don't do it cause its illegal", like they could if it wasn't/ )))2
I need a new fucking job. Woke up at half 11, missed a couple of meetings. Think I'm just apathetic coz of stupid fucking lying bastard management.9
My room is well isolated from street noise, today I am having some trouble to sleep, and can't stand ear buds. So I said isolated from street noise, but now I can fucking hear the mother fucker upstairs snorting like he was lying next to me
I really like my position as the head of my department. But I am most definitely hitting walls(and in some way breaking them) concerning the way the CTO(my direct boss) deals with a lot of the things that his management team wants to do.
For example, the previous manager could only do so much in terms of directing a software team since she did not have a formal background in computer science or engineering, thus the developers that she had would tell her the different deals with many things and she would have to take their word for it. Nothing necessarily bad with this, but it just meant that a lot of things could have gone smoother had she the knowledge to fix said items. Whenever she would try to use resources(dev time or such) the CTO will resort to the all powerful manthra of "if it ain't broke don't fix it!".
but it was about more than fixing things that were breaking, our internal services and admin boards were built using all of the WRONG proper development practices, it feels as if they took the book of best practices.....and said fuck it and did whatever the fuck they wanted. It is the worst PHP/Java/JS code I have ever seen in my entire life and the reason why even though I do not concur with it I will always understand the dislike from other developers. Our services look like something that came out from the 90s, no style, no engineering concepts in place, no versioning no testing NADA zip(these are all web based services)
One in particular, it was an admin board used internally to let students evaluate their professors, the entire app is shit, and it was broken, for some UNGODLY reason, the original dev decided to use some weird external libraries he got from some blog somewhere and as such something that would take about 5 or 6 files is now a mess with over 200 php/js files all over the fucking place. The CTO insisted on fixing them, they were all broken, and I continuously told him that redesigning the application would be faster.
Mofo fought me on it, and in the end I did what I wanted and rebuilt the app.
It took me one afternoon. One fucking afternoon, over possibly 2 weeks of fixing it.
See, I am not one to just do whatever he pleases, but I am firm in my belief that if I know a better way I will do it and save precious time. The dude had to agree with me on this and promised to consider this shit on other items that will undoubtedly come up. He was lying out of his ass but oh well..........
So, funny story with a bit of self promotion at the end.
I was recently checking out some apps on playstore and found that my first ever , "launched just to experiment" app (released 1.5 years ago) has received more than 5k downloads . I was very happy about that so posted a small message on LinkedIn .
Now , my LinkedIn profile consists of 98% people who are totally strangers and never met me ( is it just me or do you also get a lot of stranger connect requests there?). So my usual post rarely ever goes beyond 5 or 6 likes.
Bit idk how there too my post got 35+ likes and now i was on cloud9.
So i finally decided to kick my ass and release some update to that app ( it had around 70% pity comments like "nice first app,but it should have this x feature",. "overall nice but it could use an x feature " etc.
And boy what my journey was in the last 72hours.
Firstly my madhead laptop started killing me with the battery failures and constant hang.
Then my past asshole self tried to give me a middle finger. So i have this whole partition in my memory where i keep my Android stuff and apps. It has a special folder named published zone and i keep all my published app codes and related files there.
I was fairly certain that this app's code eill be also there,so i opened it, found the code and tried running it.
Turns out my asshole self had tried to mess around the code so much that all the db layer WAS fucked up, all the ui WAS changed and no code was working.
"Not to worry", i thought. I always use git and there would be a correct version some commits before. WRONG. I HAD CHANGED THE WHOLE FUCKING WORKING PRODUCTION CODE AND DIDN'T MAINTAIN A VCS!
Also this was the verbose and shitty java code my 1.5 year before self so loved to write, so it was taking me way more time to figure out what's happening in an already fucked up code.
So i tried a couple of ways to get back my working code :
- I tried looking for a google recommended solution. Those guys take my whole app code build and distribute via playstore, but they provide no means to retrieve back the original code.
- i checked my (occasionally) back up hard disk but no. My hard disk would have 100s of movies from 2016 , but not a useful piece of fuckin code.
- i also tried to get my apk and decompile it via some online decompiler. Here the google again fucks up and don't allow me to get my apk directly. Meanwhile i found a ton of shady websites which are hosting an apk of my app without my knowledge O_o . I tried to decompile on of them but code was even more non understandable than my fuck up code.
So i ended up looking at both the mess up code and decompiled code and coded the whole app from scratch ( well not scratch, i extracted the resources and some undamaged activities from the mess up code . Also github was down for more than 3 hours yesterday , at the same time when i was trying to look onto some repositories)
- DON'T FUCK UP WITH THE PRODUCTION CODE
- MAINTAIN VCS
- Your laptop is shit reliable, github is also shit reliable , so save code at multiple places.
- there are way more copies of your code lying on the internet than you think.
Checkout my app here :https://play.google.com/store/apps/...3
Weekend thought: What counts as stable in development?
From my experience it seems that "stable" is a relative concept. My linux server is "stable" in the sense that the packages are tested for a long period of time before release, but my home distro is a rolling release and that is also stable in my opinion. So which is it? Can it be both? Or maybe we're just lying to ourselves that anything is stable.
When I'm developing web applications I always have this rule that is the user can't enter and exit the application without a major error coming out, it isn't ready for production. Once that's out of the way, from my point of view the application is stable. But if I were to present this to a company would they think the same? Probably not.
What do you think counts as a stable production release?2
Spend 2 hours migrating my old NASs ubuntu zfs pool to the new freeBSD NAS, which has new fancy stuff like a crossflashed raid card new hyper efficient psu and so on. Sadly, the pool just wont import, many drives are missing. I debug. For hours. Trying to test cables. Interesting. No matter which SATA cables i switch, this one drive always starts... Hm... Must be the controller then. Maybe the controller doesnt spin up the other disks, because i removed the boot rom! That must be it! Wait... Why is this cable lying in here... Wait, this is the power cable attached to all missing driv ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! I WASTED SO MUCH FUCKING TIME ON THIS SHIT HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!
Unfortunately, one power cable become loose (i dont know how, these cables have plastic thingies to prevent this...), but it works now. And its better than before.
"Failing upwards" is not a thing, you're just denying the damage you caused and therefore lying by implication.6
Uhhhhh, it's do damn hot today :-P The thermometers are just lying! It says 21° but it feels like ... 51° Hope my ass won't melt down and bind me to the chair.13
I can't believe it.
Actually getting more fps.
My eyes are not lying. I checked twice to be sure.
And now unredirecting support for 3.38 mutter is in place it will be even more amazing.
What a time to be alive.4
It's Friday, I just want to go home and work on my side project.
At the end of the day some co-workers ask me to join for a beer. It's too hard to resist, it's just one beer. Just one beer? Who am I lying to? Its probably going to end the same way as last friday and the friday before that.
This is why I don't have time to work on my side projects.
I don't look forward to the headache tomorrow.
It's too hard to say no.
Does anyone of you feel the same way?4
Not sure if junior dev is lying or just really bad at using the search function. He made sweeping changes in code he inherited from me and failed to find all the jQuery selectors that broke because of it. And he didn't think of clicking on all the other buttons on the page to check they are still doing their thing. Of course claiming that there is no time for testing when I pointed out his mistake. Wish he'd stop being such a bad, this is not the first time this has happened!
I am lying down on the floor because I cannot figure out why this specs pass locally but repeatedly fail on the ci/cd pipeline. Literally done everything now I just want to lie here and sleep.3
Does anyone else use the old “I’m not available today / tomorrow too” with clients when they come knocking?
Y’know, to let them know you’re not at their beck and call?
Am I evil?3
I was messing around with global git precommit hooks.
Then I went on a holiday for a month, and forgot all about those hooks.
I came back, and then spent 2 days debugging why "git was behaving weirdly". I seriously started questioning whether I had ever even understood git at all. Turns out some moron (me) left some half-baked scripts lying around.
I'm such an idiot
Some humans are calm and thoughtful, some annoyingly complicated, while others with behaviours too difficult to comprehend.
I got a call from the office (former from 6 months ago) and it's from the G.M herself.
** Phone rings **
Hmm see who's calling...
Me: * Picks up phone and set it on loud speaker, so my partner can also listen *
Me: Hello Ma
G.M: Hey (calls me by my full name)
Me: It's really nice to he...
G.M: Why would you move the YETI server hosted on AWS to Azure! We have been faced with lots of challenges ever since and that has cost the company a lot.
Me: Pardon me Ma, but that...
G.M: That is a very bad and unacceptable behaviour from you and I can have the company sue you for this.
Me: Excuse me Ma, but...
G.M: I have spoken with the director of C.M.D quaters (A sister company) and explained the situation on ground about what you did before leaving without having any prior permission. What nonsense!
** At this point my partner let's call her "CC"... was more confused than me**
CC : **Panicking** Who's that? What did you do? I thought you said you no longer work at that firm, what's going on?
Now I'm confused cus I don't even know who to reply.
Me: **Signals CC to calm the fuck down**
G.M: ** Still talking and spitting out millions of threats to the guy who left the company with evil deeds in mind...**
CC who literally hates suspense and also a half cool and half crackhead kind of person... Tries stealing the phone from me so she could pour out whatever is on her mind to the caller because of how disgusted she felt, mostly for reasons I quite understood but nevertheless i kept the phone far from her reach while we both enjoyed the suiting voice of *a threat giver*
Honestly at this point my closest guess was "Joe, who must have fucked up big time" because Joe is the company's SysAdmin and has a lot of fucked up records (One time Joe tried to convert all system OSes to Linux even with our hydra servers with pre-installed windows running smoothly, his action caused a noticeable server down-time all for the reason of Joe being a Linux freak). He and only he has the power to transfer/switch/off/on servers at will. I really don't know what Joe must have done but sure thing is there is a fuck up somewhere.
Talking about me, I was only a developer enthroned only within his desk and secondly I no longer worked there. Who fucking calls a retired soldier about a lost battle after six freaking months later! Just fucking sink with your ship captain!
But how can I explain all of this to G.M without implicating Joe and also not look like snitch, I thought to myself.
While I was pondering within myself and the call which has long been disconnected, CC broke the silence.
CC: Giddy, Can you honestly explain me why your old company is calling talking about lawyers and suing you? Have you been lying to me about your work?
Me: *Explained the situation to CC*
CC: But why was she that saucy and acting a bitch? You should have spare me a minute with her.
Me: She wouldn't let me speak but we good CC. We good.
The woman that just called is the G.M. of the firm I had formerly worked with and she's also the wife to the M.D of the same firm which was my former direct Boss whom I respect a lot. Having a disjunct with the wife can also affect the relationship with the husband, which I don't want to lose. So we cool!
Maybe I should text her or maybe not... But before then
** Another call comes in **
It's her again.
GM: Hello Giddy (Sounding calm)
Me: (WTF. She called me by my first name and also sounds cool... More confused than a stray dog) ...Yeah Hello
GM: I just called to let you know that my accusation was wrong because I was misinformed. Joe Nosa was in charge on Systems but why didn't you correct me on that during our last conversation?
Me: ... 😲
CC: (Drags the phone) Hello and Good morning whosoever...
G.M: Sorry who am I speaking with?
CC: (Introduced herself) I overheard your last conversation with Giddy, and I demand you appogise to him both in written and in verbal because not only did you accused him falsely, you also almost bridge the trust between us which may have cost the relationship.
** Long awkward silence **
G.M: Hey Giddy, I'm sorry. Just angry about what went down recently.
Me: All good ma'am
CC: ** Hangs up **1
Bought myself a new graphics card as my old one died. After i got my system runnning again ( Linux Mint 17), by fixing the video drivers i concluded that i may want to get into gaming again.
I have a free Windows 10 Pro licence lying around so lets try to get dual boot running.
Hmm seems like i cant install windows after linux without installing grub2 again through a recovery disc. Well okay wanted to try out mint 19 anyway.
Downloaded both Isos. Linux mint is 1,5Gb and Windows 10 is 4,3Gb. MS what are you doing ?!
Only have a 4GB USB-Drive and dont want to buy a new one. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT MICROSOFT.
So at a forum i found a software to remove packages from windows isos and now i'm sitting here removing windows bloatware for 4 FUCKING HOURS, JUST TO INSTALL WINDOWS.
Ofc that tool was only windows specific so i had to install windows in a vm first.
Fucking tired of this shit.3
Look, extra remote team member. If I hired you with the express requirement that you work and/or live in sync with my time zone, and you claim to live and work in my time zone for a few weeks but you're lying to me and you were actually just on vacation here and have moved back overseas, you SUCK. And now we're firmly entrenched with the project and it's near impossible to fire you at this point if I don't want to deal with a whole new developer and learning curve!!!
On Sunday nights I hate doing what I love for a job. Lying in bed for hours too excited to sleep. Brain won't switch off about the cool things I'll be too tired to work on properly in a few hours
Vuex, redux, any spa store interface. Can we quit lying to ourselves that shoving every little last thing into a complex web of dispatches, commits and mutations is actually making our lives easier. I cant even hire a seasoned vue developer without spending two months getting them to speed on the application because our store has become 5 times the size of the initial project. Then on top of that, our store tests are twice the size of their respective stores. In effort to become perfectionists, we remove productivity.1
I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. We brought on a vendor to provide us some fancy OCR tool. It barely works. It's been barely working. And the vendor is so adamant it works it's so difficult to get them to send people onsight to work with us. We complained about it to the exec and we got "Oh they're a tech startup. You have to help them along with developing their process blah blah blah". Well they don't want help we offered they keep existing their shit is top secret (and it works). When they make changes remotely it's like they blindly make a change and then throw it to us to test. When we can get them to come in they hang around till the problem is fixed (more than once we've had to tell them how to fix it.) and they fly as fast as they fucking can through the door. A guy on my team even built something similar backed by Azure but we were given directive to work with them. And now we're getting pressure about delays in launch. But it's not our fault. The vendors asshole lying CEO keeps making shit up and we're told to work with it. Yet it's our fault that we missed deadlines? fuck this place !!! fuck all of this !!!6
Resently I was messing around with USB extender cables that I had lying around. And I made this.
And I got it to ba able to go pretty far but then I realized that I could spider man my external battery from outlet to outlet.
I am calling it spideemanning.1
So i decided to hit the gym last night because why not? Now i haven't gone to a gym in a long time, so my stupid self thought why not lift some weights, and rather than starting with something light and gradually increasing the weight i went for the heaviest dumbbells, guess who's lying in the bed now, not even able to lift his hands to code? This fucking sucks i can't even lift a damn spoon without having cramps, i tried rubbing some massage gel but it doesn't seem to do any difference, do you guys have any advice? Thanks :)2
So... a fucking frontend developer is responsible for
- conducting meetings regarding the future of the website,
- talking to the bosses at their own desired times,
- researching on the designs,
- then asking the designer to make the design,
- then implementing those designs
- then again talk with the boss if he likes those designs, then again research ask designer to make designs, and then again fucking implement those designs?
Well fuck it. The politics everyone tries to play at different levels just to grill the poor intern is beyond repair.
A simpler flow could be that boss directly interact with the developer and the designer in a meeting, the designer could then come up with a design based on boss's suggestion, could interact with me and the boss regarding acceptability and practicality and then we could make it once and for all. But nope. 2large is the 10x dev intern that the world needs to grill .
The above is a somewhat exaggerated but real description of what I am currently facing. Since people are good here and am not being pressurized for the time delays, am somewhat cool about it.
But this kind of thing was something that haunted me to the core at another company, where people were not much nice. :|
Blames are actively being thrown on each other . Designs are impractical. the senior devs just "assumes" that junior/intern would magically make stuff without any instructions. And not just the product, but the 100% clean, bug free product, so they don't need to neither review nor provide a direction nor any help when intern couldn't do it.
"But you are an engineer , right? what did you do in your college life? Didn't you studied those subjects" : Fuck you, govi .
Welcome to "Product Based Startups" . God, how long I have to face such unfunctional systems? or do I have to just adapt and learn the art of lying, delaying and playing the blame game?1
*never* come into a GitHub repository to hijack all the issues with microscopically different questions that are largely off topic from the original issue.
but if you do, and you manage to go as far as to tell the developers that they are practically lying to your face because after all "you think the same code can easily do that other thing", then go fuck yourself in the arse with the biggest pole you can find and walk straight into hell.
it's probably a better option than my stone cold wrath anyway.
I actually don't mind setting up the printer. What I do mind is when they call me when the computer won't even turn on. Like I have spare power supply's just lying around.1
"I'll make a library out of this part of code, so it'll be portable! But another day, I have to make the whole thing work first"
*1 month later*
"Alright, why are there 4 different versions of this class lying around?"
*LookAtCalendar* 1st april already done this year...
I would suggest to use the function to set a "mentally challenged"-flag on the user profile.
Let's hope the developers behind that idea are still lying under their desks laughing their asses off.3
I think we may be getting too attached to our phones. First it was linking logins now important things that prolly shouldn't be left lying around in the open...3
if i didn't know any better...i'd say youtube is lying about being at 1080 res. pixelated and jaggity as hell. redo resolution, looks better. ya...okay. go swallow your own head youtube4
I just discovered the best way to get public WiFi in my new apartment is by sitting in my bed.
It's a struggle anywhere else and lying don't work... It's looking a special sweet spot...
Me: (lying peacefully with my legs touching sky and scrolling through some tutorials on my phone)
Dad: (frustrated seeing me in that posture) Everyone should be given a phone and you should start making something like a head gear that will hold that thing on thier eyes! Isn't that a "cool idea" you keep looking for your startup?
its 3:08 AM here and i think i just had sleep paralysis, few moments ago.
I woke in the afternoon last morning. Soo was not feeling sleepy. Thought of just closing eyes for few minutes before picking a book. That was around 2 AM
Next thing i could remember, All of sudden, I faced a force from back, like holding me from moving. I could not move my hand, face, body or anything. I felt like i was conscious. Then a few seconds later, it was all gone. I couldn't make noise, but tried to make some. Just after few second, felt like i came back to consciousness. I was scared to hell. Didn't even had courage to pick phone lying a feet from me, on bed.
I felt something like this, after more than two years, if i could remember properly. I still don't have courage to turn my back6
Been lying on the bed for 5 hours now and still can’t sleep. Popping a melatonin now... hope I don’t overdose on this stuff....RIP....11
I know everyone acting cool on the Internet that they've made friends while coding is lying. This is real life not twilight!3
Out of any service industry web dev is the only one that shorts it own market and full of lies making it impossible for any real person trying to make and honest living and everyone seems to be okay with it - no other trade does this 25 years experience haven't found a job yet in a year something's not right too many people are lying making people untrustworthy I know I'm not the only one that feels like this8
When your project partner tells you not yo use database constraints, know that he's about to do some messy handling of the database.
How can someone make a user deletable and leave his other data lying around in other tables? I'm tired.
Messy codes everywhere.2
It's weird that I feel okay with team leads or managers who I know are lying about facts, just to motivate the team in some way. I mean I might lose respect to that person but I would somehow commend their people skills. A pat in the back goes a long way2
My senior is lying about fixing bugs in my code to the big boss. I can’t prove it because I don’t have access to the live site files. I don’t have the rapport with the higher ups yet, what do I do?12
CraZy 🎶 crazy for feeling
I’m crazy for lying
Crazy for dying 🎶
SO QUIT FUCKING LYING YOU AWFUL INSANE FUCKING BASTARDS !!!!
Here I’ll give them another chance
Did this happen before ?3
Opengenus talks about how his honesty bit him in his ass and I'd like to expound further on the topic.
You have to remember, honesty is rarely rewarded.
My motto is LLAMF, a powerful tool for success.
Like a buddhist mantra, I chant it every morning as I'm getting out of bed.
If you look around you'll see this wherever you turn your head. On the news? People lying like a mothafuka for their job. People selling something on tv? Billboard? internet? Lying like a mothafuka. People in fancy suits with fancy pieces of cloth tied around their neck to tell you who the master holding their dog leash is? "I did not kill that hooker", "We have to sign the law to know whats in it", "These ratfuck starving terrorhobos huddled inside a cave out in buttfuck nowhere, saudi arabia? They made a nuclear bomb!". Lying..like a mothafuka.
And all of them have careers, or jobs, or some cause, or principles they 'believe' in. Or nation they 'serve'. Or any other justification, any other *excuse*. But really thats all it is.
In this great big universe, you didn't exist for billions, possibly trillions of years, and now you do, for a brief span, and then afterward, you'll cease to exist (maybe, who knows what happens after death?), for more billions or trillions of years.
Put on that scale, no utterance out of your mouth *can* or *will* ever really truly matter. at all.
I say, go nuts for donuts.
Did you know I was almost a billionaire? TRUE STORY.
Did you know I once told a guy in a turtle neck sweater about this great new idea for portable phones. His name was steve jobs. TRUE STORY.
Did you know I cowrote a canticle for leibowitz? TRUE STORY.
Did you know I'm a mothafuking time traveler? TRUE STORY.
Napoleon said "Imagination Rules The World". Of course he also said a bunch of other things, mostly (all) in french. I don't speak french. But why live in ordinary reality when countless others do? Why not live in a world all your own making, and let people believe whatever the hell you tell them? Why not be the most interesting person in the room? Or the most obnoxious, but hey, at least no one can say you didn't try!
Lie to me. You know I love it when you do.
My favorite lie I tell to *myself*, every morning. Like zen. "I'm gonna do something great one day."
And it keeps me going, keeps me high.
Whats your favorite kinda lie?5
The fucking LAN port cover broke
The Internet of things tells me you can't fucking replace it (nobody sells this part)
Lan ports aren't important I guess
Make something useless by having part of it covered by flimsy plastic that breaks if you stare at it long enough
And I thought having o lying 2 usb slots was bad...
Next laptop will be a... i don't fucking know... something BETTER
Wait, 2h until posting another rant?
@dfox wasn't it just one before? :(
And it deleted my wonderful tags :c
I found such a nice tag and now I forgot it :c
Now you won't know how hilarious the tag was, and I'm sad
I've got some free time at school today and decided to go to our teacher assistans room after checking his schedule. It was obviously his 'office time' and the only purpose of that time was assisting students that need help with something.
I've been there before and we had a nice conversation about tech stuff other than school things. So I thought I could go there in my free time today.
He said he's kind of busy when I've asked him if he got some time or not. Eventually we had a 5 min talk and I left BUT I've seen something on his monitor at the exact moment I stepped into his room.
Bitch, you were watching John Wick 3 trailer before I came in. So this is how you're busy, huh?
Stop fucking lying please.
In my head: Look man, I'm not saying you're lying. I just need examples of these reported failures. Call times, caller IDs, etc. I am trying to track this issue for you, but we've had no failures, and the call samples you provided show that the calls went through. We've tested the calls and they went through. You tested the call with your cell and it went through. Can you please provide examples of failures? That's what I need to help you. I'm not calling you a liar. Oh, and by the way, GO FUCK YOURSELF!
Worst interview was with a kind of "Job Promoter" lying on my capabilities and the interviewer clearly saw I wasn't able to do some stuffs.1
Ugh i am so addicted to coding while lying on a bed. How do you guys go on coding while sitting for hours and hours?8
I used to love the hero treatment I got long ago in my previous company. Appreciations and what not for conducting events, contributing to open source. I think I burned out later. Later the hero treatment stopped there and I craved for it when I wasn't doing the stuff I used to do - basically I was previously keeping others happy I guess, instead of keeping myself happy. Contributing to open source or conducting events was not even part of the day job and was mostly considered outside the working hours and hence one had to stretch to do all that extra stuff. I over did stuff I guess and burned out
In my current company, I see heros and appreciations so much for contributing to open source though not all our roles are completely defined as open source roles and we instead have to work on closed source or yet to be open sourced stuff. My role is contributing a very tiiiiiny testing bit in an yet to be open sourced project, but a few other colleagues of mine work on closed source paid advanced version of the open source core project
Seeing all the hero treatment where I'm not the hero and seeing all the appreciation, I wonder how it doesn't seem right. Surely I'm jealous, lol. But I also felt the treatment also shows some sort of Special treatment for some people. It's "Special" and not exactly for all and only for open source contributors or people doing all the popularly so called as "cool" stuff. Fortunately for them their job role kinda mentions that I believe. And people working on closed source are now trying to contribute there. I'm stuck with some of my main day job work and dying in guilt for burning out, and not being able to contribute to open source and also kind of starting to hate open source for it's dark sides. Reminds me Batman dialogue "You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.". Open Source dark sides - of course the possibile dark sides of companies funding open source, the people behind the companies and also of course my company being one of them possibly, though if you ask anyone they say "Community comes first". That's full of lies is what I would say.
Inclusivity gets thrown out the window. Heroes get to talk. Heroes get worshipped. Others are not even noticed I think. I guess the only way to get noticed is to imitate the heroes
At some point I realized I'm envying or idolizing a crazy set of people, or like putting them on a pedestal. I'm trying to fix that in my head. But oh my, you should see all the treatment, the respect, etc. Surely some people just are there to do meh or grunt work or even good work or whatever without much appreciation, and then have to move on. No respect or consideration for opinions, thoughts usually. Some of them don't even have the time to care to check what people have to say. Top down hierarchy but they say it's flat hierarchy. They don't even wanna listen to some of us I think, that is during team meetings. Only very few care from what I have noticed
One good thing is I have to come to realize how much I'm like them in some behaviours and feeling damn guilty. I sometimes spend time thinking how to change myself for the long term. And how to avoid the toxic behaviors in the team and also control my anger and control my response to their behaviours. I'm also trying to understand where I'm climbing the ladder with my assumptions and also trying to see the "real" thing instead of assuming or being blind or imagining etc. But it has become so hard because idk if people are faking it, it's become very hard to always assume people are telling the truth 🙈 though it makes to assume or believe that by default. If people are okay with themselves lying, who am I question that huh1
I hate when application is lying to me. For example when it says my message has proper length, in this case maximal allowed length (showing 0 characters remaining), but then throws some random error message like "Your comment is probably blank.". But when I apply some magic, like when I remove 2* characters from it, suddenly it's working as expected. (Removing 1 character isn't working, hence the magic.)
PS: This does devRant Android app and web version as well.
Security theater is not security.
I am still on my mother's cell plan. I pay for it, but she is the primary account holder. We are grandfathered into unlimited no restrictions data, and a new phone yearly, so yeah, not giving that up.
Anyway, when i go to the store to manage the account they say, 'sorry, Sarah needs to come in as the primary account holder.'
'I am sarah' I tell them. I am lying, they know I am lying, and they know I know.
But they have no choice but to go along. I even asked once; they are not allowed to ask for proof of id. I don't know why.
It's just security theater.1
This might be a highly specific mistake but, never ever uninstall the ms-office package installed on your work pc, linked to your corporate ms account. And then try to install another version from an installer you have lying around. Internal Support Team wasn't happy. 😅
What's the best way to turn a phone into a dedicated http server? I have a useless android lying about. Wanna turn it into a server.
Linux tools on android? Or forget about android and install Linux on it from scratch? Which flavour?
I can't delete stuff!
I am currently sorting through my harddrive(s) and realized I have over 800 gigabytes of raw audio and video from four of our theatre productions lying around. The films have long been edited and there is no use for the source material anymore.
But just in case, I'm keeping it. You never know...
I was thinking about the things I do or do not, at the time when an action has to be taken. There are certain things that
1.) i would never do, probably because i am taught by society /culture as inappropriate,
2.) things that i don't want to do (which again I/the values i got from society/family/culture find wrong) yet end up doing, and
3.) the things that i intentionally do as a decision taken by me based on my knowledge of right /wrong/correct/incorrect.
The first and third case could be called as morals being correctly followed, but the tendency to fall into 2nd category is where my weakness would show.
for eg, killing someone in any situation would never be my action, because that's my moral, but lying in a situation is something that i could deviate to, and that's my weakness.
So why do we fall in the 2nd category? why do we become weak at following the morals? how do you face your decisions ? is there a way to never fall into the 2nd category i.e doing something that you know is wrong?1
I got a SIM card activated for my dad yesterday. Here in SA you need to verify your identity to get the card activated. But the company's systems were offline yesterday while I got it from another distributor of theirs 2 shops over. Now a day later they tell me I have to go and get another one because the one I got won't be activated because of it being offline. Something about it being assigned to me while it is offline makes it not work.
WHAT BULLSHIT? WHO THE HELL CODES THAT TRIPE TO FAIL TWICE AS HARD AS IT SHOULD? IT MAKES NO SENSE IF THE THING IS OFFLINE FOR THIS TO HAPPEN.
And yet, with Telkom's legendary poor service I know the service people are not lying. They just don't know what the hell is going on.
Just burning right through the years of our lives aren’t we ? Same bitch
Same unfinished work
Same jack assess
I wish people hadn’t gone out of their way to make me feel they were full of shit at points
Liars lying requires some real annoying thoughts to determine if they’re lying 100% of the time or just deceiving because they know you think that6
How is your stand on lying to the stakeholders about the project management.
To give context I worked on a research project for the half a year. Had to report yesterday about what I would do differently if I could start over. I responded truthfully and told that since now I know the caviates of the type of project I did, I would do nearly everything differently. Today I received a feedback from my boss that this was an absolute No Go.
I don't understand now what purpose it would serve to lie towards my stakeholders. Can someone clarify this for me thanks5
HP Process Automation. Hideous abortion of a product for eForms and workflow. HP took it on when they acquired Autonomy the original developers. And Autonomy are now getting in trouble for possibly lying about their success figures before being acquired.
Feature request: could we use the volume buttons for scrolling? 9gag app style? Personally, I love lying down and just using the buttons to scroll down to eternity. I'm willing to code it myself, for Android. @dfox2
Am I in developer hell already? A shitty project is about to come to an end (hopefully), or should I rather say: It needs to come to an end. But I am still quite lost in how to deal with it, hence procrastinating on it - making the deadline come closer and with it the realization that I'll probably have to rewrite almost everything. I'm not sure how, but I do know that the current code is a dumpster fire.
Basically what I need to do is dealing with the APIs of different payment providers/gateways (like PayPal, AmazonPay). For most cases I'll get a payment ID from the shop and need to act on it later, e.g. capture the authorized money in the case of a credit card transaction or do refunds (without user interaction, unless there is an error). Now at first I put something together where I try to abstract the payment information into two tables:
Unfortunately trying to abstract the different payment methods and to squeeze them (and their different possible stati and functions) in these tables was not very successful, it's a total mess with magic numbers, half-broken behavior and without any consideration for partial payments/captures or unfinished requests (i.e. if there is an exception before the response is dealt with, there is no indication that anything has ever been sent). Also the current amount is calculated through the history of the paymentDetails table, which basically works differently for each payment type.
How to fix this mess in a way that I'll still have a job by next week?
I'm trying to improve the db schema first, as I think my biggest problems are lying there. Through some research I've come across a recommendation for making payment type specific subtables (with a magic number/string in the main table to prevent having to look up all subtables). That way I can record what I send and receive without having to abstract it too much, so I'll have an acceptable transaction log. The paymentDetails table can be removed (necessary fields go to the payments table). The payments table gets multiple fields for the amount (differentiating between open, authorized, captured, processing and refunded values) and always reflects the current status.
I think I'm going in the right direction here. hm. Maybe there's some light at the end of this long, dark tunnel. Or a train. I'll have two days to find out.6
I used vim, Sublime and most recently vscode. I had Webstorm lying around for about 2 months now, and I'd really like to switch to it but it's constant fight, and not one im winning either... :(
Any advice from fellow "devs who rant" ?6
I have raspberry pi 3 lying around; at the same time, I want to make a minecraft server to play on with 4-6 friends. Is the pi3 capable of running a server? I tried running it once but it was so slow you could outrun the world rendering with as few as 2 players. Would trying to run it multithreadedly help?
Or should I just resign to a server rental site? it'd preferably be a vps since I really don't like these 'management' sites gaming providers often make - any recommendations that are as cheap as possible)1
My current "file/media server" is a crappy old falling apart windows box with a stupid mismash of internal and external drives with no redundancy. That sucks for a number of reasons, so planning on dropping around a grand or so (including drives) on doing it properly.
Space requirement would be around 20TB-ish of usable space, with 1 disk's worth of redundancy. That can include a newish 5TB drive I have lying around however. Would also run either Plex / Jellyfin, so some horsepower for transcoding would be nice (but no need for more than a single 1080 stream at once.) 24/7 operation, so don't want anything too power hungry.
Current (loose) thinking on the hardware side is an AM4 board and a reasonably low end CPU, 3x8TB WD golds. Software side, probably CentOS, then mergerfs + snapraid. Anyone got any insight as to other options? Hardware not my speciality in particular, so open to suggestions.14
There are alot of questions in the job industry I'm not aware of. job gaps, lying, job hopping, hr and little details I didn't even notice.
I have a job gap for 2 months.(Nov and December) and planning to land a job on January.
For 2 weeks, I got burned out and need to recover my motivation to move on because my employer told me the job industry of not being honest, but being a dick and slave is what it gets to keep the job.
This December, I'm just going to do my side projects and little coding challenge(not the fizzbuzz). I don't plan to create short term side projects. I have to keep on practicing.
I'll be a slave in January. But I don't want to work 48 hours a week.1
Holy fucking shit, I hate ubuntu SO much.
So what it happened..
I was tryin to set up an Ubuntu server on my machine using virtual box, and I know what you are thinking, "VirtualBox?" yeah its the only machine I had lying around and it had windows and I didn't wanna re-format its hard drive.
So Here how it goes...
Install went fine.. But when I was trying to manage multiple network interfaces, it was Terrible & pain in the ASS 😡...
So initially I needed 2 network interfaces, one for NAT adapter and another Host-only interface for SSH and stuff.. so I made changes in virtualbox settings and rebooted the VM. and it stuck on "a start job is running for wait for network to be configured" I was like okayy and removed host-only adapter and rebooted, it booted fine :/ then I tried combo of bridged adapter with my Ethernet and a host-only adapter, and what? it booted finally! but this wasn't an optimal solution because it had and IP address within subnet of other devices with my router and half the bandwidth (like 50mbps or something).. I reverted back to NAT network & I checked with ifconfig and it STILL didn't had an IP address assigned to it for Host-only adapter!! FFS I deleted the VM and reinstalled the whole thing again but this time both interfaces attached..
after installing it stuck on same shit again :'(
"a start job is running for wait for network to be configured"... FUCK!
after about an hour of troubleshooting and trying different configurations, I still couldn't get it to work.. I never had such problems with centOS.
Fuck you ubuntu.. fuck you in the ass7