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Another dev on my team just got a new machine. Before he came in today I made two separate USB installers and left him these notes.
60 -
To all new devs:
- Your language of choice is fine.
- There is no superior way to indent, yours is fine.
- Your IDE is fine.
- Your OS is fine.
Unless you work in my team, of course.18 -
When the new guy on the team uses click bait titles on his PRs... that’s when you realise this guys going to go far.
12 -
// repost \\
To all new devs:
• Your language of choice is fine.
• There is no superior way to indent, yours is fine.
• Your IDE is fine.
• Your OS is fine.
Unless you work in my team, of course.18 -
Just left a job where I felt like one of the best devs on the team. At my new job I feel I have so much to learn from the devs I work with. I'm so happy. :)9
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So I have been temporarily assigned to new team .. moving from mainly backend.. to help the Web team ..
Me .: Aight guys .. what we working with ?
Team: MVC .net
Me: awesome ..
Team: but we have our own version of MVC .
Me : 🤔 your own MVC ?
Team: yeh we only buse controllers.. but no models at all ?
Me.: 😲 So where does the view gets its data from ?
Team : from Azure functions apps.
M: how ?
T: ( in very proud tone ) .. we use js to call all functions.
M: so why not just use HTML pages . Why MVC then !
T: coz MVC is modern architecture design.
M: but you not using it and all of calles to the functions are exposed publicly.
T: 🧐 THIS IS MODERN DESIGN !!
M: 🤪 My bad .. what the hell do I know ! I only been developing MVC applications for 7 years !!
Please tell me more about your " Modern Design "
🤮🤮🤮25 -
>we increased new releases to once a day
> wow, how'd you do that?
> fired the QA team
Credit - @iamdevloper✓3 -
New devRant energy drinks we'll be handing out at our booth at Techcrunch Disrupt NYC next Tuesday. Swing by and meet Team devRant (me and @dfox)!
10 -
We hired a new team lead. On his first day he wore green leather elf shoes. Yeah, the pointy kind.
He also ended up being one of my favorite people ever, but also one of the weirdest.3 -
Our parent company is pushing a new zero defect policy for code that gets shipped.
The next day they announced they are firing our QA team.
WTF?!14 -
My Senior php backend team leader told me I could choose a new laptop, he said:
"You could always choose a mac, and be a real developer"
mean while I was already downloading ubuntu, and replied
"No thanks, I don't do html/css"11 -
Gotta do this at my office, especially at the cube where the "New Guy" in the team sits!
--Evil Laughs--
4 -
That's it. I'm done. I'm out. Tired of a team and manager who refuse to make me feel like part of the team.
Officially started looking for a new job today.
🤞11 -
My team are the best coworkers I've had. Admittedly I'm only 4 years into my professional career, but my team makes me stay with my current job.
My team do a lot of silly things to keep everyone in a good mood, and stress free. This week we've had a game where in a quote moment you just yell the name of a primitive type (like BOOL). Why? No idea, but we're enjoying it.
We also have a chicken hat that we named Barry. He sits with people on their desk to do code reviews and such. When people leave they get their own Barry to take with them to their new job. We introduce people to him as a regular member of the team.
Sometimes work sucks. Being a developer can be hard, and can be stressful. Working with this team makes it worth it. -
Seniors: Welcome to the team. Feel free to ask anything if you need help. There is no such thing as stupid questions.
New Dev: Sure. Thanks.
*a few minutes later*
New Dev: How to comment a code?
Seniors: Google it....and please don't ask stupid questions.11 -
Your first day at work be like:
"If your new team doesn’t use git, announce your resignation immediately and walk out."4 -
My team was sharing an API key to our company's microservice containing all our customer data.
I say "was" because one team member accidentally published the key online so the security team disabled our key and won't give us a new one.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry4 -
I did it! I FUCKING DID IT! I got the new job, where I am paid better and won't get abused! The culture is better, pay is better!
My struggle now! Do I do finger guns to my current boss after telling him? I hate that asshole.13 -
Mobile app crashed a lot after latest release. Everyone called for a meeting to discuss the issue and find resolutions.
Engineering lead for backend team: well part of our problem is we haven’t had time to test everything fully. Maybe product could give us a list of all the features that can’t go down and we’ll prioritize those for testing?
Product: ... ... ... all of them?
Me: laughing hysterically while on mute2 -
Bus-Factor: A new metric to describe how well kowledge is distributed among the team members by calculating how many of your team members can be run over by a bus without killing your project!6
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12 - 1pm is lunch time. What the hell is it with this team and arranging meetings for this time, does nobody eat?
*Propose new time*
Justification: ... i'm fucking hungry4 -
Ugh, fxk. I got a promotion, I'm now a team lead for 4 developers, and I fxking hate it.
They never asked me if I wanted the position, they just threw me into it this week. They ripped me away from the team I had great chemistry with and put me on this other team with people I have no connection with.
To make matters worse, I'm also responsible for production servers of the clients of this team, one has malware even.
On top of all of this, they made me move desks for a new developer to fill my spot.
How do you demote yourself? Why would a company want someone to perform poorly (on purpose, I don't care) than to just keep their employee happy?
/end rant14 -
UI/UX Team: "We're using a new piece of software; all you developers can install it, its going to revolutionise our workflow and collaboration"
Me: *checks download page* ... "Only supports MacOS... FFFUUUU"
Where is all the linux love these days -_-9 -
One of the new guys on another team calls the Internet the Innernet because he doesn't hear the T. He both days and writes it as Innernet.
He told me today he wants to switch to our network team.9 -
When I joined my team in august as a junior/trainee, we were 6 developers.
Now we are 4 left in the team.
By the end of june, we are 1.. I mean its me, myself and I.
Wtf did I do!? My code isnt that spaghetti. I think...
But its np, just me with a 20 years old database, 7 legacy systems and a new one planned.
Atleast my boss believes in me keeping this shit floating.11 -
When the whole dev team desperately tries to convince the boss to get Linux on the new servers instead of windows.6
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whenever my team starts on a new project we're all like "okay we're gonna have MEANINGFUL commit messages this time guys"
*5 hours later*
$ git commit -m "go fuck yourself"
[master a7b9de] go fuck yourself
1 file changed, 1 insertion(+), 0 deletions(-)4 -
I have been a team leader for about 2-3 years. My boss announced that the company will be accepting WordPress Development services and it will be fucking assigned to me and I will be given a new team. Don't get me wrong but WordPress has been my bread & butter when I'm still a college student for I have to fund my own tuition and apply for free-lance and part time jobs. But those days have been a pain in the ass and I don't want to experience those days anymore. Well, I will definitely going to look for a new job. Bye2
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Just started my new job.
Poorly defined requirements ✅
Expecting things to be done yesterday ✅
Poorly managed teams ✅
Terrible legacy code ✅
Half the development team is offshore ✅
Maybe I’m just selfish, but I need to work in an environment that has the following
A good technology stack.
A competent manager/team leader.
Competent colleagues.
Clearly defined documentation.
A proper onboarding process.
Why is this so difficult to find in organisations?12 -
Received devRant stickers today. First international package. :D.
One of this stickers is going on my bike or bike helmet. For others, waiting for new laptop. Thanks David, Tim and team devRant from Mumbai, India.
13 -
## 4 years ago:
- Principal Architect: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: IDK, let's test it!
*we run tests*
- Perf team: results are OK, but we're exhausting Burst IO capacity, effectively hard-limiting number of tests we can run per day
- PArch: ahhh, I see. Then Gp2 is a no-go.
## 3 years ago
*PArch quits. New one is hired*
- PArch2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- PArch2: I see. Let's test it again anyway
- Perf team: *wtf???*
*we run the same tests, we get the same results*
- PArch2: I see, so GP2 is a no-go.
- Perf team: *you think....? How did that thought never cross our minds, we wonder...*
## 2 years ago
*new DBA is hired*
- DBA2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- PArch2: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- DBA2: I see. Let's test it anyways. I've read somewhere that GP2 might be a better bet
- PArch2: you might be right, let's do that
- Perf team: *wtf???*
*we run the same tests, we get the same results*
- DBA2: I see, so GP2 is a no-go.
- Perf team: *you think....? How did that thought never cross our minds, we wonder...*
## 1 year ago
*DBA manager left; new one was hired*
- MGMT_dba2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- ........
Should we even bother bringing up the history.....?
11 -
Fourth day at new job, hired as a C++ developer.
"We think you'll be a good fit in this team!"
It's a huge JavaScript project. I feel lost and confused 😓8 -
We use MS Teams and I started a new team for the contract renewal. My preference was to continue with the old one for files and searching. I am the “owner” and the PM is the “owner”. Everyone else is a “member”. Owner means admin. The executive sees that she is a mere member and demands the PM add her as an owner. He makes her an owner. Then she decides that she outranks is and should be the only owner. We discover this because we can’t on-board a new person on the team or configure build notifications or GitHub code review notifications.
Basically the executive has stopped the team from using Teams because her ego tells her that she is the one true “owner.”5 -
Interview for a new job
Team leader: well yes, we have this webapp with Angular, it's a bit convoluted so we need help working on it
Me: sounds good enough, I have no experience with Angular though, I'll need to learn on the road
Team leader: no worries :)
A couple of weeks later, after joining the team
Me: wait a moment, that's not Angular you got there. That's AngularJS, it's like 10 years old
Team leader: 😊
Bruh11 -
Today, a team mate has sent me this picture: he found this Olivetti in the street, near a trash bin. He will take it to the office next Monday so we are going to troll other team mates with this new and fantastic mechanical keyboard!!
2 -
Hey y'all!
So uh, I just finished my first week in the new jawb. And thought you guys would appreciate seeing the swagducky's new home!
My first week was awesome, the team is a group of interesting, skilled and clever people.
They started me off on an introductory task... I've been building an iOS game in unity! Different to the say job but damn it's been fun 😂😄
5 -
A while back our whole team was really frustrated with the marketing department.
In retaliation we made a new branch for our project called marketing-bs, which was used for all of marketing feature requests.
It's the little wins that keep us going.1 -
My team is working against me, seriously time to look for a new job! Bad management, piss poor communication, and...I'm in the wrong room: https://www.devrant.io/rants/285723
1 -
So after a llllllloooooonnnnnnngggggg struggle with the team i've been working with, today is the day that my group move to a different org and start working with a different team.
This is a huge step in the right direction for us and we are so happy. This new team is much bigger, but has been around for a lot longer and has proper processes in place and works a lot smoother. Never going to be perfect, but still going to be much more workable and we are so ...... thats an interesting linter file, hhhmmm they have disabled all the checks for the stuff that will cause crashes, like force unwrapping ... but they've enabled the rule to make sure our imports are sorted alphabetically
... nope, cant do it, no sign of intelligent life in this company at all. linkedin here I come.7 -
Today a new person joined the team.
Started bitching about the entire team for not having documentation for our already written code and software.
Asks the manager for a new task that he can take up so that he can write documentation for all our already coded works.
Manager says Go On.
Troubles me with 400 questions every 3 minutes in the name of Knowledge Transfer for writing his documentation.
Sends a proud mail to the team for writing this new documentation that no one else had time to do.
He is a newbie and had no other task to do anyway.
I seriously don't know if I should feel proud of him, for writing new documentation,
Or if he's doing this to defame me.
The team is filled with snakes.15 -
!rant
I'm currently helping a junior developer in my team to get on board. He is new to Linux and whenever I ask him to work on vi editor, I get to see that look on his face!
16 -
Before we started a new project, as a team, we set some ground rules like: frequent, small, digestible PRs.
PR#1: 52 files (week 1)
PR#2: 107 files (week 2)
JUST FUCK OFF MATE!!!2 -
When new developers join in your team, please make a time and help them to get confidence with the project they will work on. Besides the project's documentation there is a human factor that can make the difference between a just another dev team and a great one.2
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@dfox can you please implement a gang feature? Someone assigns an hashtag to some people and everytime this hashtag is called, the team members get a notif.
Adittionally, maybe you could add gang stats (how many new rants, how many times the hastag was mentioned etc...)36 -
Who in their right mind though it would be a good idea to move the web development team to a new office without checking that the internet is connected.
What a waste of three working days.
And of course the project needs to be delivered by Sunday...3 -
I manage a team of engineers.
Toxic Culture Post #2:
Manager: Everybody on your team needs their own swimlane in Jira. Each person's work should be their own lane. When I have a ticket for <Project A> I want to make sure that <Bob> always gets it, all tickets for <Project B> must go to <James>. You'll need to figure out which team member will handle <New Project C> and create their personal swim lane.
Me: That's not really how SCRUM works. Actually, that's not how teamwork works. You're creating silos and we all need to learn how to do these tasks. We're a cross-functional team, and each team member brings their own unique talents to the whole process.
Manager: So you'll create the swimlanes?
Me: No
Manager (to Bob): You'll be devoted to <Project A> from now own. It's the only work I expect you to do. All work for that project will be yours.
Likewise, my manager also reached out to each team member and assigned them specific tasks, furthering the silos.6 -
Today I got fired (I work for a outsourcing company and was the client that "fired me") and the reason was that the work load was low.... funny thing is that they contested a new dev for my team and she is staying only because she is in the same office as the main team and I'm on a different office.
How fucked up is this?29 -
New country, new company, new team, new projects.
I'm supposed to be the TL of a team working on a React project.
A guy in his late 40s celebrates himself as "the senior", he basically just finished watching a youtube thing, React 101 crash course or similar. The other two juniors who did only Wordpress so far venerate him like a god.
The code, of course, is one on the finest pieces of crap I ever had the pleasure to deal with in my life: naturally a bunch of JQuery plugins for everything, no tests, no state management, side effects everywhere, shared state and globals like hell, everything written in ES3/ES5 style, no types, no docs, build and deploy totally manual, deep props drilling at every level... and not to mention the console.log() shipped in prod.
First day, already headache.
Full rewrite start tomorrow.
Hiring real devs as well.4 -
When you’re way more experienced and new to a team and are met with “but this is how we’ve done it for ages, and it’s done fine for us” but the sprint performance shows they’ve not completed one in 2 years.
5 -
My previous boss disappeared for a week and didn't tell us why. We thought the team was gonna get fired because of him and I even started looking for a new job. The team got fired, but they kept me for some other work.4
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ceo: we need new docs, kiki should make them
tens of team members: lemme explain docs to kiki
ceo: don’t you fucking dare, let kiki execute their unique thought process
☺️14 -
WORST: moved from Canada to France and went from a company with agile methods to one without methods.
A 8 months nightmare...
So much useless meeting, for no result
A drupal project... with a junior team with no drupal experience at all.
And a general "i don't give a fuck" feeling from everyone.
BEST: My new job. Building from scratch a Team with agile methods, backed by my hierarchy.3 -
Just joined a new team at the organisation as senior dev.
Team lead keeps singing about how we need unit testing and good standards.
I implement domain pattern on the backend supported by unit tests.
It passes QA and then get an earful about the code not being 'restful'. What does that even mean?
Well, it matters not since team lead changes the whole feature in the release branch and all unit tests obviously fails. Builds start to fail.
The solution? Comment out all unit tests. In the sprint retro, we hear the same old adage 'we need 80% code coverage'
Do as i say, not as I do. FML.6 -
Me: "hey we should do this new project in react!"
Boss: "no he barrier to entry is to tough for our team"
Boss talks to past employee(which he had to let go because he was a TERRIBLE developer who now works for facebook....) about new project, past employee recommends react....
Team is now going to work on a new project written with react......1 -
5 of us working for a larger team were tasked with doing some R&D, we blew everyone away and were given funding to start a new team and hire people to make the project come to life.
One of the high level sales / product managers we were reporting to, secretly had another team work on a similar idea because he needed it quicker (i.e. no time for research, just build it).
After forming new team, we were asked to work on his project instead because it was further along. 4 months later, big knob comes to a meeting and basically says "You know what, this doesn't look like we have enough features, we need more, but I don't know what".
Project blew up 2 months later, head of the unit kicked up a shit storm saying how badly everything was planned and canned everything. Now one of our clients is building nearly the same thing we were originally working on, the team no longer exists and i'm back on the R&D team.
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the R&D team, actually didn't want to leave in the first place but was told I had to. But the sheer anger and frustration to see that walking cluster fuck strutting around like his shit doesn't stink, derailing entire teams, meanwhile we can't hire new staff due to lack of funding.
Heres an idea, fire the fucktards bleeding us dry ... then we'll have lots of funding. -
I'm a backend (Java, Kotlin) developer and I mainly design & develop services and Android apps which consume these services.
My team in my current organization (I've been working here since past 2 years) just got merged with another team.
And now the new boss wants me to fix some fuck ups in their project which is written in C#, with some WCF and other stuff.
As this stuff is completely new for me, I asked for some time to get familiar with the environment. But the answer was a big NO.
As a result, "I've started looking out for a new job"
😡😠
Fuckin management screws up everything!4 -
My former team had an "ux expert" who made ux templates for new features.
For years since he started his job, the team was told that there will be a first face-2-face meeting.
It never came to this point.
Instead all the team know about this guy is that his name is Thomas and that he does all the talk and decisions with our client without a word with the team, bringing their imaginations to li(f|v)e...
Genius! xD
No wonder the team got mad after some water had ran down the river.
At first they only questioned really poor design decisions.
But after a while the productivity of the team dropped, because they weren't willing to accept any of those design decisions.
Boi o boi.
Things escalated pretty well ;)3 -
Need to send a mail to a more senior member of the team. Could use a hand translating the below into something more work appropriate.
"You have reached a new level of wrong, you insufferable prick, please just shut up and leave"11 -
In a meeting with my new team I asked if they had a preference between tabs and spaces. None of them cared.
#notrealdevs4 -
When you add a new team member and have to upgrade the numbers of users for your Atlassian products...
2 -
Our new COO has decided to migrate our passwords from to a new password manager (due to security concerns).
But now, nearly 75% of our passwords are just 'missing' and we don't have access anymore to our first password manager and it's been emptied out.
AFAIK, the COO still has all the passwords but not shared. He is not responding to my mails / team message from the past day.10 -
Sprint planning:
PO: I have a great idea for a new game changing feature
Team: cool, let’s talk requirements, etc
PO: nah, I trust you can come up with the best implementation possible
Sprint demo:
Team: presents the feature
PO: Why are you guys always doing it your way, instead of following my vision?!
Every single sprint...2 -
Trying to investigate why the team of new Devs are reporting a particular set of modules is not properly maintainable, found this little gem at the root, written in 2014.
4 -
The moment when you are tasked with finding a new person to your team for the lower position than yours and you check the going monthly rates on the job market just to realize that they are higher than yours is.9
-
My very first rant here was about the mess of ticket submission and ticket tracking applications we use, and about how we were moving to a single unified system some day.
Well, that day is today. And, predictably, it went horribly wrong.
So the way it's supposed to work is people login to the portal, search for what they want to request, then fill in details and submit. It creates a request ticket assigned to the appropriate team. (The old way involved a bunch of nonsense that you can see in my first rant).
The thing is, I found out about this today, when I got a company-wide email saying the new system was live as of this morning. None of us knew it would happen today. Not that I could've foreseen any issues just by getting the announcement early, but still, usually people find out about these things beforehand.
So, ecstatic to finally be rid of the old ticket tracking system, I log into the new system and look for our request form, which is, of course, not there. I check the old system and see that they combined every single "general request" into a single request where you pick which team the request goes to.
So I finally find the right request, pick the right department from the drop-down, and see that the request looks much better than it did on the old system. Out of curiosity, I look at the list of people who are part of that department.
I am not on the list.
My ENTIRE TEAM is not on the list.
Because they migrated the team data to the new system a year ago, when the issue tracking/reporting portion of it went live. My current team was hired approximately six months after that and apparently updating the team data in the new system isn't part of our Onboarding process yet.
So... Bright side is I guess I will have a lot of free time soon since nobody can submit new project work to my team?
tl;dr: they took a great software product and implemented it so poorly that our team can't use it.3 -
Is a week enough time to figure out if a company is right?
I'm not sure if I like this new leadership team...
I'm starting to think that I might have been far happier with my previous gig...11 -
When you still own a Lumia and realize how useless it's with all the non official apps and crappy optimization. But the you there is DevRant
+ New, clean and modern UI
+ Optimization
+ Fast
Thanks you to your team to bring such an amazing master piece to here4 -
New project team name needed
Random team name generator suggested "The snowballers"
Errrr no I don't think so 🤢
https://urbandictionary.com/define....4 -
Me apprentice 18 years old in germany: I don’t want to go in another team
Also me in the new team after 2 days: playing with my new boss during work CSGO and say everyone we are to busy with the big project3 -
My Team Lead: Hey do you know goofy?
Me: What is it?
TL: It's a new programming language
Me: *being suspicious* show me what are you dealing with
TL: *Shows me a Groovy code snippet*
Me: Yeah!! Your goofy is pretty good!! Enjoy! 😡1 -
Abuse "new" google meet background feature level : 999
- while in meeting take screenshot of one of my team mates
- mirror the screenshot and put is a background
- now pretending that I'm at their place
after half an year of lockdown... It was fun1 -
PHB wanted access to our team chat room where we do standup, among other things. Access granted. Immediately a new chat room was created.
2 -
My current new boss is pretty awesome. When he arrived, we were a lot of juniors dev crumbling under pressure. He directly went to product team and to sales team and totally reduced our workload to something acceptable.
He values sane work environment a lot, and I think that's what make a good boss -
(in a meeting between o&m team and business partners to assign priorities to various tasks)
I.T.: So what priority would you put this new task?
Business : it's our 1.
I.T.: ok, and this other one?
B: it's a 1.
I.T.: ... -
When your new team-members don't commit their code end of day Friday and you end up working the whole holiday weekend to fix their shitty work while they're away for the week....
Joys of being a team-lead..1 -
Started a new job and our tech lead doesn't know how to use GIT in a team environment, has only ever used it while working by himself on one person projects. Kinda worried...2
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I got moved to a new team. My old team was truly agile, and my manager was very "off hands" and actually let us work.
My new team is an older team that practices a bloated abomination called SAFe Agile, and the manager gets into all the details to the point of removing autonomy.
Shoot me please.
Paradise lost. -
nobody in my team works at my location. they are all at different sites of the world.
can i have the option to work 100% remote please?
my company:
no :-)
oh, it is soooo hard to recruit new team members :-) what in the world could we possibly do??5 -
when you love trying out new software that could improve your entire company’s setup but the rest of your team runs from it 👀3
-
For those who have seen me ranting about ending up in a bad team.....
Few days back I was emotionally and mentally affected to a level I couldn't handle anymore. I spoke to my manager (our team got a new manager who is sensible and serious) and asked for team change and he said it was possible but he would need some time. 🙂1 -
devRant keeps getting better and better! Collabs are great and the new avatar pets rock! Thanks devRant team.
What do you guys think of my new pets?2 -
Can someone explain some of my colleagues that THEY DON'T FUCKING NEED A DIFFERENT SLACK TEAM FOR EVERYTHING!
Want to have some random talk? Let's create a new Slack team
Want to add notifications from Git? Let's create a new Slack team
Want to try some new bot they found? Let's create another fucking Slack team3 -
I always try to explain the new coding conventions to my team but they think it's funny and should not be taken seriously [facepalm]2
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You remember my team with scrums that last more than hour? They just decided that it is not enough - we will have another, morning, scrum. I am looking for a new job.5
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"The tool to push new releases to the data centre blocked us last night. Saying all the nodes are 'unhealthy', resolve the issue(s) first. But then the remote team said 'we have a way around that' so we managed to get it deployed in time. We need to document the process as there were many ... 'shady' processes and steps involved lol"
- Manager explaining how the first production release on our new team went last night
... he called it a success1 -
Team meeting. We are getting religous. They just agreed after an hour argunent to keep curly braces on the same line not new line. Im gonna need a teraphy to follow that practice.9
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My most useless meeting was probably the review meeting for a new team I had to consult for a short while for. A review to find why nothing gets done on time. Everyone showed up an hour late, including the boss.4
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Haven't ranted in a while so here it goes.
Head of product took me (senior dev) to a high value client workshop/demo session and over the course of two days found the reason behind why the dev team has been pushed to the limit as of late and sales/product team has been making promises to clients without checking with dev leaders on reasonable delivery dates on massive new features.
I tried my best to manage expectations by differing talking about delivery dates by saying "lets discuss that with the team" rather than giving out dates right now. But as soon as the meeting ends he sends an email to the client confirming delivery dates on features that we have done no research on or even specialize in!
Please tell me this is not how well established businesses work or is that the new reality of things. In either case I wanna find a new job :/2 -
One of our most essential functions was giving a weird warning: C4706. Turns out that one of our team member wrote if(count =! 0)... Yes, he's new here
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Company is celebrating new awards. Whole dev team basically says fuck you we have better things todo and isn’t attending for champagne.
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Message I just sent my boss about a new person on a completely different team...
"Hey boss, would you be able to figure out who supervises [xyz] and ask them to... Supervise some more? Been getting a bunch of super basic questions and don't have time to train them up from scratch for [other team] right now"5 -
The new devRant vote info is great! Improvements like this is one reason we all love devRant! Thanks devRant team for implementing this.
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So, our team got a new dart board. Not the magnetic one, the wooden one with sharp darts.
Now, we all are wondering where should we place it, so that it is safe for everyone.3 -
So today at work while trying to get a group of people together to play a game of foosball my boss comes up to my friend and starts talking with him.
The conversation then goes on to include the topic of a new hire coming onboard and my boss not wanting to take him into our team because he feels that the new hire isn’t smart enough.
I’m the time span of this argument/conversation I went and helped another coworker, bought a keyboard from a friend and also finished reading a 25 page white paper.
At the end he still doesn’t want to have the new hire on our team.
All I wanted to do was play a game of foosball 😥8 -
I fckin love it when you start working on a new project in a new team and the 5000 lines of Angular code are acompanied by 0 documentation.
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Being a junior and part of a small team at a startup, working with a new software architecture, even the team lead is a beginner in it. It feels like I'm at an echo chamber, there's nobody expert enough to look up to if stuck, decisions seem to be based on opinions rather than an architectural design kinda point of view.
Ugh, I hope I'm not the only here ever feeling this way.7 -
Fist day at new job. Supposedly I only came to pick a laptop. Been here for seven hours because the team leader wanted to meet and pass some instructions, and still a no show.
Not a very good omen…6 -
It's depressing how much time I spend asking, begging, demanding, and pleading for the older devs on my dev team to follow simple naming conventions. And every time I ask, they act like it's new information.3
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New team in new company is awesome, no meetings for standup just post in slack channel, less meetings = work feeling less like work for me4
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The new devRant long story feature is great! Very nice to have them in one place. Thanks devRant team!
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Just needing somewhere to let some steam off
Tl;dr: perfectly fine commandline system is replaced by bad ui system because it has a ui.
For a while now we have had a development k8s cluster for the dev team. Using helm as composing framework everything worked perfectly via the console. Being able to quickly test new code to existing apps, and even deploy new (and even third party apps) on a simar-to-production system was a breeze.
Introducing Rancher
We are now required to commit every helm configuration change to a git repository and merge to master (master is used on dev and prod) before even being able to test the the configuration change, as the package is not created until after the merge is completed.
Rolling out new tags now also requires a VCS change as you have to point to the docker image version within a file.
As we now have this awesome new system, the ops didn't see a reason to give us access to kubectl. So the dev team is stuck with a ui, but this should give the dev team more flexibility and independence, and more people from the team can roll releases.
Back to reality: since the new system we have hogged more time from ops than we have done in a while, everyone needs to learn a new unintuitive tool, and the funny thing, only a few people can actually accept VCS changes as it impacts dev and prod. So the entire reason this was done, so it is reachable to more people, is out the window.3 -
Hired by large prestigious company to do web development. Understanding at the outset, I was not a web developer, just wanted my foot in the door with the company. 2 days after orientation, I am placed on a $20 million contract expansion with 3 other developers. All new to this contract. So: new language, new technologies, new team, no leadership, no mentorship. 2 months later after a month of asking for help, I'm asked why I'm not delivering solid code by the project exec and moved to the testing team. Testing team lead introduces me to people on the contract and answers questions or tells me vaguely where to loom. Spend last 4 months building a professional fuck you by making myself a yes man to everyone and their mother. Left the contract and have been getting regular hours with them since (including developing for them). New contract loves me and despite the project execs attempt to torpedo me, I have an excellent reputation and am positioned for career advancement already.
I couldn't give him the finger, but I made him regret lettimg me go. Original team lead has since been released for unrelated HR complaint. -
!Rant But this is hilarious 😂
Appraisal interview of Gayle:
Gayle:- Sir, I scored 211 Runs in 118 Balls. I made the team win the crucial match. I should get “A” rating.
Management:- You hit 17 Sixes and 23 Fours. Though, that is good but that is not something new you have done. That is why we hired you. As this is not something new, I will mark it as “Innovation Lacking”.
Gayle:- But sir, I played according to the situation. I took 21 singles as well.
Management:- Exactly, your performance is not consistent. You played 15 Dot Balls as well. This means, you failed to optimize the resources.
Gayle:- But…
Management:- Also, I would like to mention that you are not a team player. The whole team scored 112 and you all alone made 211.
Gayle:- What??
Management:- Yes. So, overall, you are getting a “C” rating for the year. Improve Consistency, Innovation, Utilization and Team Work...1 -
Tomorrow starts a new guy in my team (I am TL), but I have never seen him before! 😕
A coworker resigned during the hiring process and has had his last day today and I am overtaking his team because my boss is unable to set up a job profile.
180% of workload and even more new guys arriving (2 more in the next 2 months!)
No salary raise either...
FML4 -
My new team mates type in the date and time of commit on their commit messages and maintain code only on master branch. Some people deserve have their write access revoked.2
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Being a team lead is watching your members grow more and more while you stay out of date because you don’t have any more time to read and learn what’s new3
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This wanker approached me via LinkedIn before new year to be team lead to a diverse team of devs spread over a few time zones.
The mission? Build a metacritic clone, but geographically constrained to New York.
Me : How much are you offering?
Him: <radio silence>1 -
Oh my effing goodness...just went through the repo of an app we're working on and this new dev in our team saved his commits with, "ok", "done", "fixed", "another one", "arrggghhh!", "wow!"..."not complete"...for fucks sakes...DUDE!1
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After remembered my boss for two months to create a team GitHub acc, he finally made it today.
Time for a new era 🤓
New frameworks, new source Control what's next?
CI Tools? 😱😂
Feels awesome to work with the good tools you already know from your private projects 🤗1 -
Me: (Talking to new recruits) "Remember, you should only ever work on one project at a time. The different requirements, complications, and resolution times will fuck you over. That's the last thing you need, being new to the team and all that. If the client needs more man power, then-" (you get the idea)
Also me: 3 monitors and working on 4 projects. *Sips coke*1 -
Have you ever encountered a situation like this before?
You worked in a team, made many adjustments in the codebase, and all the changes you've made are the best practice (after some research or asking the community).
But the team leader decided to go with the "messy" version of the code and the team leader does adjust the principle of "bad code" in favour of your coworker, just because he/she is a friend of the team leader.
So, whatever you adjust or contribute is simply nullified but any adjustments made by your coworker are considered "new updates".5 -
setInterval(() => {throw new Error("April fools!"}, 100);
Time to make the front end team hate me.4 -
Back from long weekend... Already want another...
Perhaps I've finally realized the team cannot be saved, work isn't fun anymore, it sucks being the linchpin, and I'm just not having fun anymore...
And for one I think I've even take a pay cut to get onto a new but better managed and 100% senior team -
I'm doomed.
My first production worker script is making multiple active attribute of a user. My script should be able to deactive the old attributes if there is new one.
Months ago, this issue occured. My teammate from team A take over the script to investigate since I am busy working with team B.
Yesterday, I found out that I, myself, overwrite the fix my teammate made for that because of a new feature.
I have to clean up the affected records on production on Monday..and i have to explain to my manager. T.T
LPT: ALWAYS PULL REPO before developing new feature... -
that feel when I am the only one in team who knows at least one framework.. and coworkers refuse to learn and instead copy and paste code parts from old, insecure apps into new apps... 😐1
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New job. Pays more but is fucking boring as hell.
Team is a drag and everything is slow... This is the kind of company I was trying to get away from...12 -
TL;DR: A new "process" for collaboration between teams was created in order to stonewall requests from my team.
A couple months ago, we created a new Dev team that specializes in writing internal tools. This team was staffed with internal developers, and got a separate manager. The whole point of this team was to collaborate with my dev team so we can both help each other develop tools that the company needs.
One of the developers that was on my team went over to this team while he and I were still working on a big application. For a few weeks, he still worked on this application as he normally would, and we'd sit with each other and work through features together whenever we needed a fresh set of eyes.
Well, eventually his new team got protective of him and created a new "process" for our teams to request assistance from one another. So now instead of just popping over to someone's desk to ask a quick question, you have to send an email to the team and request that you can borrow that particular developer for a question, and then the entire team sits down and discusses whether or not they're going to allow that person to answer your question. Then after a week of discussion, if they decide to allow it, they schedule a meeting for a week later, in which you will get the question answered.
So instead of just spending 2 minutes to ask and answer the question, you have to spend weeks in order to request assistance, and then schedule a meeting.
It's ridiculous, and it's all because his team got protective that he was working with another Dev team. Dev teams collaborate all the time, and work together. My team is constantly helping other teams, and we don't have this ridiculous process. We get asked a question, and we answer it. Simple as that.
Last week, I sent an email for assistance in completing a feature, and didn't hear back. I talked to the Product Owner for the team, and he said "Just send an email," to which I responded that I did and hadn't got a response. He said "Oh....." I then told my boss that this is an enormous bottleneck, and he seemed surprised hearing that this is a bottleneck.
A week passed and today I still hadn't got a response, so my boss reached out to the Product Owner to push him. Finally, I got a response and they scheduled a meeting to answer my question 3 days down the road. So it's going on 2 weeks to get this simple question answered.
Normally I'd just have the other developer come over and help, but apparently they yelled at him the last time he did that.
The issue is that the process was created with the assistance of our "senior" developers, who never work with this other team in this capacity, so they just nodded and smiled and let them put this ridiculous process in place.
Like, get off your high horses. You don't "own" him, he's allowed to collaborate with other teams. This question would've taken literally 10 minutes, but because of your new "process" you've turned it into a 2 week debacle and you've effectively delayed the app launch with your pettiness.
They say that this process isn't intended to prevent us from getting assistance, and that might not have been the original intention of the Product Owner/manager, but it's very clear that the developers on the other team are taking advantage of it and using it as a big stonewall so they can beat around the bush and avoid providing assistance when it's needed.
If this becomes a trend, I'm going to schedule a meeting (which apparently they love to do,) and we're going re-work this entire process, because it's extremely counterproductive and seems to only exist in order to create red tape.3 -
I want to fuck the whole Skype team until death for blocking my contacts and won't let me to make any call with my father and my family member. FUCK YOU SKYPE.
Happy new year to all devRanters !2 -
!rant First code review in the new team, came back with list of helpful suggestions and constructive criticisms. Yep I'm going to like it here. Excited to be learning from the bests.
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my first job is in a brand-new team, all team mate other than the manager are new grads from colleges. we r so engaged and dedicated our efforts to deliver something. and one day one of our team mate decided to resign due to family issues, we try our best throw him a farewell party, it is so emotional. now I have worked in a couple of teams, the spirit could not found after then.1
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Explaining to the new team, all with experience, how to compile and what to do with errors. 😓
What are they teaching in school these days?1 -
Spotted a new feature that had just recently being completed: "Disable all Logging due to noise". What.
Us on the Ops team just died a bit inside... -
Got transferred on to a new team. The team I was on previously was successful, had great processes, and very smart people. New team was floundering, very late, no processes, and crotchety. Did my best with the (lack of) expectations and information given to me. No one gave me any feedback. Get called into a meeting to discuss my lack of performance and failure to meet goals. If I hadn't needed the money I would have walked out. Transferred teams a month later.
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Products team just hit me up with random requirements straight out of their ass. They know very well my entire team is wrapped up building a new app. Now I respond with random mêmes. Fuck you.5
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I hear so many rants/jokes about making releases on Friday evenings. But my new team makes almost all releases on Friday evenings 😶😶1
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Joining a new team to find that ,
Non .. and I mean non of all of their code is Asynchronous!! non .. zeroo !!
And they have told me to follow their practices !
I forze for a couple of seconds then I said : no !2 -
Ooh what a nice feeling it is when you come back from a short vacation and everything is in the gutter... My team is divided into the two other teams... (I said divided but I ment everyone got assigned into team X... And I am the only one who was put into team Y)
Besides the whole team fiasco, I think my legacy project decided to role around in the garbage... Because I have no idea where all those bugs came from...
One positive thing is that I won't be working alone on that legacy project anymore, at the start of next week I get help from my new team... Now let's hope they don't suck!1 -
So related to my very first rant, after two months on the new job, I got the whole team together (including my boss) and taught them how version controlling works!5
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I no longer work with those !Ð↑Ωŧ$, but when ex-teammates told me that they have to escalate some issue to them and pasted the responses they got from that team..
Ooooh boy. I REALLY want to create new swear words.1 -
Looking for a team mate for https://spot-next.io - a new fast and small OSS microservice-focussed ORM RAD framework
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When companies don't understand what DevOps is and don't know how to implement it.
I hate when the term DevOps gets slapped onto a traditional Ops or sys admin team and they call it a day.
It's become the new agile.3 -
Started a new job at a big firm (previously came from a startup). Both do "scrum". Still have my mind blown because at the new job, we have people join the standup of which NOBODY in the team knows what their role is on the product...
Does this happen often in big corporates?5 -
Funny team names? A team at my comapany cant call themselves the "super high intensity team" so they gotta find a new name.15
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Our Other it team asked me to create a new repository instead of a new branch in my project just cuz they thought branching would be more time consuming than maintaining a separate repo for emergency bug fixes.
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It's official, I'm now the only senior in my team, the other person got promoted for a new position in a new team and now I'm fucked.2
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I joined a a new company .. the Technical team leader .. is coming from a lawyer background.. and feel threaten by new technology and insist on using old technology so he feel relevant !
The project manager has a background of business management which I understand but .....
It's been 3 days and am asking my self if I made the right choice by joining such company ...3 -
We have a new team member in our team. So I was giving her one to one KT. After KT
She: so are there new changes coming soon?
Me: Yes there will. Now you here I could really use a hand.
She: that's what he said3 -
With 182 compile errors management wants the new build out by Monday morning but neglect to say this until end of day Saturday. They also knew for a week or better that they were going to enforce the deadline on each team.
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I have *created* a new team member :) I think he alone could replace most of the team.
Kind of makes you think what have we been doing with our time all those years. If all that work can be automated :/5 -
Best way to deal with office politics?
As background: we have our own implementation of some C++ data structures, including an "Array" class (basically the same as std::vector).
A few years ago, the senior guys on my team refused to add new features to it for (seemingly) no good reason.
So senior guys from another team added the features anyways, in THEIR repo.
My team couldn't stop them, but refused to allow the new features in OUR repo, so now our Array is split between two repos for no good reason 😢.
Two years later, here I am, hoping to clean this up. As far as anyone knows, there's no good reason to have it split up like this.
How do i convince my team that we should move the code to OUR repo where it belongs?7 -
Fuck it. Two big releases plus all the minor shit raining down on our team with only three active devs. A new team member who's unfortunately more of a burden and nuisance while the whole ship burns so beautifully....
And stupid me? I fucking break my arm, is in a cast now for four weeks. So I can mostly watch, while everything sinks.4 -
Job review time,
(just a random pick from the a list).
---
"Engineering Lead"
Translation: "Chief Calculator Officer"
"Anyone can design or spec a product, get it manufactured overseas and get it to market. But will it be good? Will people buy it?"
Translation: "We're looking for a miracle"
"Take on a top notch team that is going places in Electronics, R&D and advanced product development."
Translation: "Professional Excel engineer wanted"
"This company is a little-known success story that has been operating for over X years, making mission-critical electronic equipment for use by consumers, professionals, government and industry."
Translation: "Design weapons and tamagotchis."
"Working as part of the Senior Leadership team, you will have charge of the I.P. engine and product development team spinning up new ideas and throwing them out the door."
Translation: "You're success is our success. Your failure is your failure."
"The Role
- Generate New Ideas
- Push for new products
- Drive manufacturing
- Manage a cross disciplinary team that includes Electronics, Software and Mechanical
- Project Manage new projects to completion
- Interact with marketing and sales to drive results"
Translation: "We've never hired one person to be a whole team before but we think it will work."
"On your first day, we expect:
- Strong Leadership experience and skills
- Solid Engineering Fundamentals
- Experience taking new and existing products to market
- Experience with manufacturing high-tech, mission critical equipment
- Commercial Acumen
- Bachelors in Electrical or Electronic Engineering"
Translation: "We expect you know where to hide the drugs already."
"Nice to have:
- Experience with Defense or Medical Systems
- R&D background
- MBA, B. Commerce or similar"
Translation: "By clicking on this job ad your background check is already under way."
"In return:
- A loyal and oustanding team will be there to support you
- Extremely knowledgeable experts to guide you
- Incredibly smart founders to mentor you
- The opportunity to work on a real product
- Extremely generous salary package"
Translation: "Our last dev has removed the Warrant Canary. Can you pleeease put it back?!"2 -
The mechanical team once told me, hey I want this feature on the software - sure it will take approx 1 week. Yea I know, but I want it without any bugs.
WTF?? They sure got some f words from me. 😅1 -
You join a new team. You find that the code is horrendous. Do you
A. Run away while in probation?
B. Start complaining about it and have the others hate you?
C. Cry silently and hope things will get better?9 -
The most senior person on the devops team just turned in his two week notice. I started a month after him and am now the most senior. Our old manager was fired back in the spring.
I really need a new job.3 -
Company Infrastructure Team: We are doing away with proprietary libraries and using standard Java instead.
Also Company Infrastructure Team: Here have a fuck ton of new proprietary libraries with dozens of nested dependencies. Oh we don’t use Maven by the way because we are fucking idiots. -
I can't believe he chose the kid over me.
My boss decided he needs a new team leader, (he led it till now) at start he said none of the team members fit one guy is new, the other is young and this his it's first job after college.
After weeks dragging us, he chose the kid over me.
I am more experienced then him (10 years in the industry) and led the team most of the time.
As "consolation prize" he let me chose a professional course of my choice.
I am so disappointed from his choice and from myself, I just feel like drop it all off and go somewhere else.
I am 3 years there, and people are like "how can it be? You're one of the veterans in the company."
So embarrassing.
Should I stay or should I go
Thanks for reading this long rent.1 -
When you have two managers and one of them is trying to screw you into a position on his team even though you have made it clear that you want nothing to do with that type of development.
I am looking for a new job now...3 -
I'll be starting a new job soon, and I'm sure there will be a chance to implement some form of process for the dev team to use...
To Scrum or to Kanban?2 -
our team are responsible to build backend restful API for other team to look up data in DB.
the consumer team just sit beside us.
the interface definition came from our pm in a different time zone. btw he did not have any programming background.
and he insisted that just build what he said and ignore the noise from the consumer team. because each interface change should be considered as new features and need him to prioritize and create user story and he will review the schema with the pm from consumer team and so called architecture who did not coding real shit for years.
we ended up with building shit code not useable by our real consumer.
yes he do manage to keep our team busy building worthless shit and accomplishmented lots of jira items to show we have value to change a useless shit into very hard to use shit1 -
Leaving my first job 🦷after graduation as a programmer for 6 yrs.. to join an international team of developers in a new company...exciting and wierd but must 🦴👔7
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When your boss ask to convert the system to the new framework version, but still ask the other team add new module. Then said why your work never done hmmm.2
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Last day on my first job where I stayed for a year. I really enjoyed it, loved the team, we were always laughing and making jokes, even in the worst moments.
Had a leader who became a friend, I made some good friends in there.
But I was really unmotivated as a dev, we maintained a really old and complex software, with a poor infrastructure for the dev team.
The manager was a great guy, but couldn't handle much pressure, saw him about 3-4 times quarreling with someone when he should be talking with the team to solve the problem.
But as I said, he is a great guy.
Today the whole team will be making a happy hour as my farewell party. I love this guys.
After that, on monday, I'll be joining a new company, working with a whole new stack, studying a lot for this new challenge.3 -
Wow! New devRant IOS upgrade released today has some really cool new features! They must have a team of 10 coders or 1 @dfox and 1 @trogus. Great work guys!
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Mobvoi just launched the new Ticwatch S2/E2. Currently have the S1.
This FAQ page has me scratching my head. Guess their documentation team wrote part of this before they decided to pull the NFC feature?
Maybe?
If so, that's something in common with my company 🤣
1 -
Fucking fuck! I'm done.
The client IT team decided to change the whole fucking theme of Wordpress and the manager who fucking approved the previous changes left month ago.
Spent whole day trying to integrate all the changes I've done previously on different theme in new theme but this fucking new theme always decides to fuck up whole CSS every time I do some changes in theme option.
FUCKING FUCK!1 -
It's just that your team doesn't have experience in "insert platform name here" so we want to use a third party to move "insert product name here" into it.
My first thought: why don't you just train the team with the product knowledge in the new platform rather than the other way around? Does anyone else see this happen and want to eat glass every time it does?4 -
For me it has to be dealing with other developers who don’t want to keen with the times.
I don’t mind anyone deciding they don’t want to learn new things, for whatever reason.
But when you’re in a team if you feel that way it’s unreasonable to expect the whole team to stop developing their skills for you.3 -
My first job, I was expecting to be part of Android team but assigned to php team, a little disappointed but I guess as a developer its not something new 😛.
Excited first day first job2 -
A new team member joined us today. After introduction, he grabbed a chair. F*** YOU, IT'S JUST YOUR FIRST DAY BUT YOU'D GRAB KATE'S CHAIR WHO JUST TOOK A COFFEE BREAK?! PET PEEVES I HATE CHAIR GRABBERS3
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I am in this weird situation, where I work with a pretty cool team and have an awesome commute to work, and a nice salary. But I don't like the actual work that I am doing, nor the why I our team is run. Due to some personal events coming up and being still fairly new in the job I also don't want to switch (yet). Does somebody have/had similar experiences?
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Wow! Giving Thanks this morning for the new devRant upgrade. Tag suggestions, links open in app, mute notifs... Thanks devRant team
-
Showed this one to my manager the other day, she wanted to include it in our documentation for new team members...
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Changing from vscode to Visual Studio, because new team has C# projects.
Changing ide is very painful.9 -
Read this somewhere—
“C# is not just an improvement over Java, it’s an improvement over all previous languages. And the C# team has done an excellent job of introducing new features without making the API ugly. C++ fails at this, as does Java.”3 -
I was having some trouble accelerating the delivery of a new feature and so my team leader joined me for some pair programming (awesome!). Five minutes later I was selecting some, text while explaining some problems, and he stops me.
Team leader: you know, you can select all that text by double clicking it;
Me: ok (continuing to explain)
Team leader: you have to be faster with that;
Me: That's not the point right now;
Why do people focus so much on these little things?! I really like pair programming, or just pairing to think about a problem, but this kind of things really get under my skin...
(Silver lining: Cool team leader that didn't snap after I told him to focus 😅)2 -
*Email chain forwarded by support team to our dev team*
Hi,
Please assist our customer. He is unable to reset his password!
*Went through the emails turned out that customer is asking for password reset request for legacy website for which we don't work at all*
Scrum master sending another reply to look into the matter on High priority.
We again double checked for the customer but he is not registered on the new website.
Apparently, both scrum master and support team and entire company is aware that our team is not working for legacy website.
But No one reads the email properly and keep forwarding to dev team disturbing the entire team.
Some times things like this are done by product manager and her associate, but they keep replying to each other on unnecessary things till they come to conclusion and scrum master try hard to keep up with them with his own agile disciplines. -
Got hired in a new organization for a particular team. Before joining, I had met the manager of the team and the work he told me was interesting. Upon joining, on the first day, I found that I am joining some other team and the work in this team doesn't look interesting at all!! :'( :-\
It sucks! -
My company wanted to move old desktop applications to web and use angularJS. Finally, "new" tech. Not allowed to use node and Mongo because maybe someone who joins the Web team don't know Javascript and only sql experience ... Time to dust off my CV1
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A year since the Group Manager stepped into the position, 4 team leads have moved to other companies.
He is known to be politician/manipulative..
Guess what, Now there's a new Team Lead position and I was offered it.
It will be a step up for me, from senior engineer, and in other circumstances I would take the job in a heartbeat.
I guess it is not the time to step into leadership role.
What would you do?4 -
Your time is better used somewhere else, let the intern write the documentation. While the project was transitioning to a whole new team with no one from the old one.1
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I am being transferred to a new team. New team has started assigning work, but the current team has not yet released me.
So I end up working 80% of my time in the current team and 40% in my new team.
1 -
Two months in my new job, no task assigned to me yet. Not even one. There's been a budget reallocation, and the team just got dissolved. Will probably be moved to a new team (or not?). Part of me enjoys the free time I'm getting (I get to work on my side projects) but it's kind of depressing that I can't prove to the company how much I love building things while at the same time helping the company. 😔4
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Ever since I got moved to a new team a few months ago, the number of times I've wanted to go "F U, I quit" has skyrocketed...
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as someone who never worked in an office, or in a team, new term for me:
cowboying
I can guess what it means, but..
please, share... and elaborate
is this a new term?
I don't get to hear much office gossip... :)3 -
So I just noticed while looking at our release notes, we got some new members of our Shanghai team. Their English names are:
Paul, Jonas, and ....
...
...
...
...
Elvis
Every time I see his name I sort of chuckle...3 -
About to change to a new internal team next Friday. So thrilled about it! But god, motivation right now is only downhill until the move.1
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Another day I had to remind myself that I don't need to learn everything about anything in 3 hours
Lol (new equipment in for tech team and within minutes I was looking it up online) -
Our current project...
First three sprints... going fine and slow get used to each other.
Later sprints get more of a clear scope. With a deadline a couple of months later. The team raises some red flags with problems.
Seems like the PO/PM doesn't get it or ignores it.
More sprints later with more confrontations. PO/PM still doesn't get it.
Team introduces a new theme song
https://m.youtube.com/watch/...
Hopes she gets it now . . . -
The fog of war over all that happened with my change of team is starting to dissipate.
3 people were involved and there were 4 different versions of the whole situtations, but from what I've been able to collect it looks like the company is expanding and one of the mail KPI for the current team leaders is how good they are at creating a NEW generation of team leaders, to take care of the new entries.
My previous team leader told me about all these new growth perspectives and the junior entries I could manage, knowing very well of the desire I have previously expressed of being a senior dev with my small group of juniors to teach.
I declined the offer, stating that this whole year has been exhausting. Every single time I've tried anything (using modules for new components on our old web client, tsdoc to document our types, suggesting technologies like ANYTHING BUT ANGULAR AND MONGO, telling how removing down migrations was a retarded move) my suggestions were either shrugged off or flat out refused. Let alone how every time I was proven right, except for angular but give it time and that will bite their tail as well.
Don't get me wrong: they are well withing their right when they take all those decisions, and more. But I DO NOT PLAN on selling a plethora of bad decisions to a new stack of devs as if they were the gold standard.
"I understand your reasons; you, as a company, need a well coordinated team all running towards a goal; loose cannons are harmful.
But now I need you to understand me: I do not agree with your technical direction. I never lied before and I will not start now. Promotions don't matter nearly as much as my integrity, and integrity in my world means speaking up about problems. Your position is perfectly valid, but mine is as well and they can't be reconciled. If I were you I'd make myself a favor and make sure IHateForALiving doesn't become a team leader; given your direction, I'm not the man you want right now".
As mentioned, one of the KPI for team leaders is how succesfull they are in finding new team leaders, and trying to turn me into one didn't end well; I love sharing knowledge, but being honest to myself is far more important to me. So this meant my previous team leader failed in a very big task, and thus was demoted? At the same time, I've been there for 2 years now so they're not really eager to replace me, but I'm under strict examination too as of now.5 -
I gave my team 2 weeks notice last week. Now, every time something “stupid” happens, this is how I feel! I’ll be starting at my new job in a few weeks and couldn’t be more excited!
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When a new manager joins ur team and start talking about shit he doesn't even understand and use the word "sacrifices"... Bitch, i've being in this entrepreneurship doing the job of 5 ppol for 5 years don't talk 2 me about sacrifice and compromise 🙄1
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Getting settled on a new team. They are using this custom built Dependency manager/Build tool. I’ve now wasted 2 weeks trying to get it up and I haven’t started my actual issue item yet.... sigh I wish I was on the team that uses Gradle.1
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Just realized my current team owns a new project that is smaller than the one that one I left a few years ago.... and yet we have more issues and work...1
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In my new job the main task of the team is to refactor 16 old java apps, when I was about to shot myself they told me I was going to another department.
Still have to deal with some old ass stuff(cobol and a few old Java apps) but it’s mainly new projects.
I guess there’s still a god above us.4 -
People who use automatic code beautifiers and standards fixing scripts. 😠
Agreeing on a coding style with your team is important. But I really don't feel like reviewing the new guy's PRs if it's a thousand style adjustments and a tiny bugfix.
If you disagree with the current style, communicate about it so everyone can discuss and adopt new rules, and fucking fix the whole codebase in a separate PR.1 -
One day, being new in the team i was not sure of all the DB column decodes, asked my senior member to send me decode of a column.
He sent me a 300 line SQL query. Took me 30min to understand it. -
Anyone know any good JS ES6 courses? Don't mind the price. It's great if it encourages practical learning :)
(Got a new developer on the team, junior AF)2 -
!rant - Love the new pets but only shoulder birds show up in mini avatars on posts. Cats should be available on shoulders too. :) One of our team has a cat that walks on a harness, rides & sits on his shoulders around town and while he works.2
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Me, suggests buddying system for new starters in July then again in September
Senior management "we'll take your recommendations into consideration"
Staff survey result: people don't feel part of a team.
Me: Huh. -
When you have to work in a team that are all vegetarian and you want to hit the new Pho place for beef ramen at lunch!
8 -
The service hooks at Visual Studio Team Service are a mess. A new subscription for every single event. Really?
Is it that hard to add an "everything" field? Instead I can now add 25 events one by one - for every project. -
How do you fit QA inside the weekly sprint?
At the end of a sprint, the team should be able to give something deliverable such as a new release.
How could the developers team integrate their work with the QA team along this week?
I mean, should we test individual features with QA as soon as they’re merged or make a pre-release test with all new features together before releasing? Develop 80% of the time and reserve last 20% for tests?
Could you share something or recommend any links?3 -
We offer you to join our A-team and be an important contributor in an exciting agile web development team using the latest web technologies to develop our new front end using AngularJS.1
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I started working at a new company a couple of weeks ago as a Dev/Ops engineer, my first real ops position after years of being mostly a dev with two sys-admin positions sprinkled in.
I should have seen the red warning signs when, during the interview, a developer told me the old devops team was so bad they fired all of them last year. After I started, I learned that all four people on our team were totally new. Three were hired after the last guy from the old team left (without any notice) and one person use to be a developer who was transferred over to this new team (but not to lead it).1 -
Soooo I am an apprentice who just started his third year. Everybody in my team (3 ppl) left for better jobs.
I am now basically front and backend lead, teaching four new employees our restapi, web and javafx frontend.
At the same time I fix errors happening in production and develop new features.
I guess there are many great rants to come, so stay tuned :D
Going to write about things like tests that got disabled months ago after migrating to gradle, no documentation, finding out how to set up new development workstations with an outdated script missing important steps, management, print debugging in production and much more :)
Oh and it is not that bad, I learned more in the last month than in the two years before. (not saying my team was bad)1 -
Phase one of the project we assembled a team for rapid development. The client was enthusiastic about the progress that the team made in a short time. They specifically requested the same team for phase two of the project. Executives replaced everyone on the team except me.
I looked at the new team and basically everyone on it is less technical.1 -
So the testing team at my company are a stickler for rules and are somehow bureaucratic as hell. Since I'm new to the project I usually have to make direct contact with them. They are short of me getting in their face and screaming like a madman.
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After working for a startup for 70 hours a week that taught me everything. The place was fun but lacked all the processes. But the boss eas awesome and taught me a shit a loads.
Things started geeting veryvslow so the start up is on lause right now. Anyhow... I ended up finding a job in a really undynamic city where i live where a prettysucesful and growing company just moved to.
Scrum on point， every one is cool， tasks are well established， git processes are freaking awesome and i could go on and on. 2nd week in i thank my old boss for being so precise and annoying on some very specific things because im rocking my first real it job thanks to him.
It feels good ;) -
My team has been using CVS for ages. I'm new to the team and can't imagine how my colleagues are working in this environment. I am thinking of proposing to change to git.
I found this amazing video of Linus explaining to Google engineers why git is better and I thought I'll show it to them:
https://youtu.be/4XpnKHJAok8
What do you guys say about my idea? Do you have anything that can help me?17 -
ITS FRIDAY!!!!!! such a long week..... fcking prod issue and new (anti) agile process team wants to implement2
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Best boss ?
Well, on Friday we learned our business was shutting down, bankruptcy.
Other new recruits have had a 10 days notice. My boss had me a 30 days notice instead, and have been fighting day and night since then to find a new investor to buy our solution and hire the team with it, comforting me that I will be part of that team.
Feelsgood to have a boss having your back :-)
(see previous rants for more)3 -
So I've just been proposed by my (now ex) team leader to be the next team leader. I'm scared to death because this is something completely new to me.
What are your views on the move from development to team leader? How did you handle the transition?4 -
My manager is still being an asshole to all our customers. I cannot stand him, or his bullshit corrective action/write-up he sent to HR. The entire team is frustrated with him and his personal vendetta against me has caused me to go full force, looking for new works and well as transferring teams within the company. Things are getting politically heated right now and I'm not sure how things will pan out. I wish our old VP of software didn't pass away last month. The new CTO is a total tool and fuckwit. He sees developers as subordinates who must always away managers. He hasn't talked to anyone on the networking team since being hired, or anyone on my team.1
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Do you ever feel like you can't stop putting your foot in your mouth after joining a new team? 😬 The struggle these last couple weeks has sucked!2
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So I just got an email from Github, saying they created a new package for Atom called Teletype.
I quote: "Teletype (beta) for Atom lets developers share their workspace with team members and collaborate on code in real time."
Wondering what the devRant community thinks about this new feature!
https://teletype.atom.io/1 -
I need to learn to stop offering help or telling everyone else how they should be doing things...
I end up giving myself more work..
If only I had time to look for a new team...1 -
Nothing beats when you move into a new team and your old team message you all the time for those little things they could Google... Did people really think I was that smart??? Maybe some people are better at googling than others...
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Hacking events, I always go then gather the team in the event place with team-less people.
Making new friends, having some fun, and solving some challenges.
By the way, I couldn't get a girlfriend using my coding skills, it is not working.7 -
I want a new job. Not because I want a new job, but all I want to do is tell my current team that they are a bunch of fucking morons and should kill themselves.3
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Everything was good. We were a very sophisticated agile team. We knew our work very well and we were proud of it. Every new feature was implemented in matters of hours. Everyone happy. Me, other developers, managers, customers. Until the other team felt a bit bored and decided to build a New Deploy System!
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Starting a new site in work and the Content Team ( no dev or design knowledge) suggest one thing i advise it shouldn’t be done and this is best path... later during day right so we are going with our idea! 😩
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New guy likes to both approve and merge other people's pull requests have he approves them. Please don't merge other people's pull/merge requests. Other team members may have comments too! The person who created it should merge it.1
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Why asking your dev team for any suggestions or solutions when you can easily say „make new website! Fast!“... now we have a new Website providing the exact same features as the so desired App... no further words for this.1
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I'm looking for some Remote work to do as freelance or "startup", low pay is alright if there is not too much pressure. I'm a Front end developer who's trying to actually apply some of my React knowledge, maybe someone can take me "under his/her wing" :) , HTML, CSS and Javascript (jQuery) are no problem. If anyone has any pointers or recommendations, I'd appreciate it. Thanks2
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Working on a new website for Web Designing and Web Development etc
It's great to work with the team.2 -
Here is my problem. The team I'm on has developers from other areas that were "put" into a new team. Two use "structured programming" but the requirements make me think we need "domain driven design". How in the world can I get them to evolve into another mindset while still meeting the deadline?1
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Any suggestions for Dev team names? My team has several new people and we have decided to change our name.10
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so I'm the new guy now, my new team write complicated, deep-for-no-reason IFs instead of a switch, gave me a shitload of resources to get up to date with their standards, insisted to every time make sure my code has been tested, then the first deployment I see THEM do breaks production, because a major fucking app had no tests whatsoever, also half of the team has 30+ years of experience in backend, laughs about TS on the server (which is actually fair) and I'm the frontend guy
challenge accepted4 -
When my team ships a new version, someone I've never met sends out a company wide announcement email personally thanking a bunch of people I've never heard of for their work.2
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In the last three days our team has had 4 people who were the final decider on priority for a single project.
Im staying here until my contract has ended but then I will tell my company they can find a new project for me...1 -
!rant
I just got the best pe of my carrier.. Got some extra cash, and new future career path goals..
sometimes it’s hard being in this industry, but when you find a great team, you’ll know by the support
🍻 happy Friday! -
Have you guys had any trouble trying to get the BAs to use JIRA for issue reporting/management? The dev team just upgraded to new JIRA and we are getting hard pushback... they're wanting to stick with 1-4 excel spreadsheets on a share drive...3
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PM: Can we setup this new server today ?
Me: Sure, where is the ESXi setup CD ?
PM: ehh, wasn't in the box ?
Me: nah
So Finance team can't ctrl+c, ctrl+v from what we send them and actually buy stuff we need :D1 -
*New defect*
Designs are confusing and use bad practises. Multiple buttons achieving the same task. The dev team, the BA's, PM's can't understand the current flow.
*Defect closed*
"Design happy with current implementation" -
A couple of months ago I bought a two year licence for PHPStorm but shortly after I started this new job as React Web developper and everyone in my new team has been using Visual Studio Code with a specific set of plugins and settings which make I my premium IDE useless.
What an investment I did.7 -
New types of calls. Team members need some help from me, I go on call to help them out, once the issue is fixed they just keep me on the call for company while they go about doing their tasks. Dude, even I've work to finish 😑2
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It was quite a rough begining of 2016... having to give the context of a 7 team members project to 5 new team members, that replaced 5 teammates that left the company...
2 -
Hey guys, I'm new to a dev management role. One of my responsibilities is to write tasks and do code reviews for the team. I keep getting issues in code due to the lack of contextual understanding of the codebase. How much detail should I include in a task? Should I expect my team to understand the context of the task/codebase?3
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How do you go about introducing new technologies to your company/team?
Whether it’s writing the next API in another language or using a new framework/library/approach?6 -
You know what's new among my team?
The one that put semi colon and the one doesnt. (Yes javascript)1 -
New team structure at work. Six of us. It’s a mixture of seasoned devs and new guys (me). An (subjective) objection is made about something I created. Should I push back or let the senior devs have their way?6
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Joined a new team at work hoping to learn something new. Was told by the team lead that they will be starting development on a new project that I was interested in.
Guess what it was all a fucking lie. I'm assigned a task to create documentation for some legacy java shitcode without any fucking comments.
Fine I get it, they say it's required going down the road of the new project as it will work alongside the old application. But the code is so fucking bad. For starters
-The db host and credentials are hard-coded in a million places
-it stores user credentials in plain text
-its creating files in the fucking filesystem to store things instead of storing it in the db
-each functions ranges from 100 to 8000 lines of code
Who even codes like this 🤯
And I can't fix these issues. All I need to do is document every function and class and package. Fine. Fuck this shit -
I was the new guy in a meeting where we had to decide who works on which projects.. I was last pick and had to take one for the team.. Build a freaking WordPress plugin... Fml
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So I recently started a new position as a Node JS dev, and on my first day I've been assigned to the DevOps team... The offer and the interview had me believe I was going to be actually writing code not config and yaml files5
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company restructuring is pain
finish current work ASAP
your team is now in charge of some legacy/maintenance codebases and products that another team used to own, but they're getting moved elsewhere
new projects coming in -
I am in a team where almost everyone is an apt critique. everyday new challenges and people seem to be so competitive that they don't share any information across, thus making everyone isolated and whack the motto "collaboration is key" teamwork rarely comes into play and it is most if the times one man show. thriving in such an environment is a challenge thanks team 😃
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I just got a new job as Web Director, leading a team of 4 (junior and mid level) developers. Thankfully I still get to write code, albeit less. After 7 years of development out of college, I am finally making the salary I dreamed of. What are some tips to make sure I can succeed in this position, and not have my team hate me?3
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You work in a team, for a team to move forward successfully the team should work in sync. A team always has a goal and a plan to get to it. There are times when the team needs to take a different direction therefore the set path should always be available for change because our environments dictate it.
We all have different styles of working and different opinions on how things should work. Sometimes one is wrong and the other is right, and sometimes both are wrong, or actually sometimes both are right. However, at the end of it all, the next step is a decision for the team, not an individual, and moving forward means doing it together. #KickAssTeam
The end result can not come in at the beginning but only at the end of an implementation and sometimes if you’re lucky, during implementation you can smell the shit before it hits the fan. So as humans, we will make mistakes at times by using the wrong decisions and when this happens, a strong team will pull things in the right direction quickly and together. #KickAssTeam
Having a team of different opinions does not mean not being able to work together. It actually means a strong team! #kickAssTeam However the challenging part means it can be a challenge. This calls for having processes in place that will allow the team members to be heard and for new knowledge to take lead. This space requires discipline in listening and interrogating opinions without attachment to ideas and always knowing that YOUR opinion is a suggestion, not a solution. Until it is taken on by the team. #KickAssTeam We all love our own thinking. However, learning to re-learn or change opinions when faced with new information should become as easy to take in and use.
Now, I am no expert at this however through my years of development I find this strategy to work in a team of developers. It’s a few questions you ask yourself before every commit, When faced with working in a new team and possibly as a suggestion when trying to align other team members with the team.
The point of this article, the questions to self!
Am I following the formatting standard set?
Is what I have written in line with official documentation?
Is what I am committing a technical conversion of the business requirement?
Have I duplicated functionality the framework already offers?
I have introduced a methodology, library, heavily reusable component to the system, have you had a discussion with the team before implementing?
Are your methods and functions truly responsible for 1 thing?
Will someone you will never get to talk to or your future self have documentation of your work?
Either via point number 2, domain-specific, or business requirements documentation.
Are you future thinking too much in your solution?
Will future proof have a great chance of complicating the current use case?
Remember, you can never write perfect code that cures every future problem, but what you can do perfectly is serve the current business problem you are facing and after doing that for decades, you would have had a perfect line of development success.1 -
Today, an hour left of work, our team was brought to an all-hands meeting. 20 mins later, I learned why our team was so often left out when getting a 3rd dev.
Someone higher up decided to move our train to another part of the state (it's birth place was where it is now). And that same person decided to localize all teams on a train to the same location too... which means my team is getting killed. We have an estimated lifespan of a few months.
...and here I thought moving to an open floor plan was gonna be horrible. The new location is 200 miles north (an hour 30 via the free campus bus). This won't be a fun coming new year. -
New job
Week 3: We might assign you to a new Java we might be creating
Week 5: So you might be working with the other team on an webapp.
That team has taken 2 weeks to decide the tech stack to use for the webapp and still hasn't decided.
Week 7: So we have only one role available right now and that's production support.
*Insert ultra rage face*3 -
Tl;dr any tips for new scrum team ? How to start with story points with people that dont know eachother?
More:
Its for our team project at uni ( 8 people 1 year). Yesterday we had our first meeting and the hardest part was asigning story points. Or asigning some benchmark value for story point.
Looking for some practicall tips since uni gives us all the theory we need. ( Does not mean I know all the theory :D )6 -
After Years, I've Returned! CEO and Founder of Team/Company Productions HH108!
New Announcements!
new Team Member otogi-cho 🦊🌺
Welcome to the Team!
Otogi-Cho 🦊🌺
Togi is our devloper in charge of Combat systems and polish work.
HH108 Hopes to Post a Working Beta Version of our new game "Filthy Frank'z" With a Post war theme of endless zombies chasing after you a Filthy Frank! (Hotdog) It's up to you and your allies to decide how to win!
We can only express how excited we are to launch this beta release!
In the meantime sit back and realize just how lame life is without this game...ik that's right, you can't!
Beta in current progress (no current release)
Be back soon with more info, screenshots, updates and more!5 -
Just been moved to a different team.
I talked to the old team leader, the new team leader and the CTO. Those are 3 people and I got 4 conflicting explanations. -
When talking to the integration guys, installing a new testing environment takes about 3 weeks or more.
When a new dev arrive in the team, we set his dev environment in half a day.
I don't understand such a difference.5 -
New year, new Google HashCode!!!
I need a new stupid name for my team, last year "SicroMoft" by @Fast-Nop was great, but this time I need something even better (or worse)
Also, who else is participating?6 -
The new team member seems to hate me... For releases, each component that needs to be released has an owner responsible for building and post release merging.
I already own 2 branches but she assigned me 2 more... -
My new project is going to enable business to do IT work via intuitive interfaces and eliminate the IT team dependency at all.
It's not AI/BOTS/ROBOTS/ML that will replace us, we ourselves are our own enemies 🙄12 -
Alessandro Demarinis Yonkers
Address: New York, USA
Alessandro Demarinis of Yonkers owns and operates a reputable plumbing company in New York. Alessandro Demarinis of Yonkers provides top-notch plumbing services tailored to meet individual residential and commercial business needs. Alessandro Demarinis of Yonkers employees a team of highly skilled and experienced plumbing professionals, dedicated to delivering exceptional results in a timely and professional manner.
#Plumbing #Alessandro Demarinis Yonkers
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The project I’ve been working on for the past one year has been put on maintenance mode so the number of deployments will be significantly limited (around 4 per year). So what does this mean for me? I will be moved to a new team? Or I need to start looking for a new job? Or nothing changes?
I’m backend dev btw— I don’t deploy it. DevOps does it.1 -
So I have this new role at work, still app development with some added responsibilities. Nothing major. But already I'm noticing what could be a pattern.
Zoom meetings that could have been phone calls or emails. Meeting was setup a week and a half or so in advance. Had real a meaning last week where a team member mentioned it and reminded the other team members of the upcoming meeting. We all confirmed that we'd be there.
I get a notification that the meeting is in 15 minutes. Meeting time!!! So I log on, only to see one person from the other company, two more people from said company log on then my team member. But to my surprise him and I are the only people from my team on zoom.
My team member then goes on to waste this poor man's time asking him questions that he doesn't really have the answers to and I'm here just wondering why.
Why isn't this meeting a 2 minute phone call?
Why am I in this meet?
Is my team member bored?
How does this make my company look in the eyes of these people?
Now I know why my other team member didn't log on. They smelled the rat and knew this would be a wast of time. And me being new to the team walked right into it 😐
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