New colleague in the office.

Him: How do you rename a file in terminal?
Me: Just sudo rm <filename>, rm stands for ReName.

I'm a horrible person.

My employer bought some new 40" 4k displays to the office. The want us to evaluate if they are any good, and if so replace all monitors... No real developers has one, only HR people sitting there with one huge window with office or word open!! It makes me cry! And they will most likely say they are too big!

When everyone left the office I tried one... OMG, i need this in my life! 😍

A client called

Client: Hello Mr. Can you come to our office today?

Me: Yes sure

In fews hours I was there

Client: Check this email we are getting every day

It was email from spammers who asking to redesigning their website because it was not responsive

Me: 🧐Thinking ‘valid point !’

Me: So what you need me to do for you then?

Client: We need you to redesign the site

Lol - thanks spammers for bringing in new client

Learnt Murphy's law the hard way,

Don't use your office laptop to create a personal auto porn downloading project specially when your boss suddenly wants to use your laptop to do a product demo to client.

Now looking for a new job, let me know if anyone need a smart developer who loves solving problems like the one mentioned above.

Piece of shit admin installed a chrome plugin which changed the new tab to no internet default image ... The whole office was pranked

I'm lacking a rubber duck at my office. I asked for one, but the company won't buy one. Instead they offered me a 1m x 1m sheet of bubble wrap, which they replace every day. Love my new place.

The marketing department is right next door to my office, and to make room for their new intern, a very high end, large, and noisy printer was 'temporarily' placed in my office. I'm a reasonable person though, and didn't mind this. The salespeople figured out that it makes commercial grade printouts, so for their various presentations and whatnot, they'll print enormous numbers of pages on this thing, and basically use my office as a motherfucking water-cooler. After a few weeks of this, I logged into the printer from my computer, and set it to disallow all connections from MAC addresses other than those in the marketing department, who print far less material on their own, special, dedicated printer. Absolute fucking chaos ensued. Grown men were brought to tears, ultimatums were made, and blood was shed. The hardware guys were down here for over an hour, making up absolute bullshit as to why it wasn't working(which really surprised me).

Long story short, cut off access to printer, sit back and watch the true face of humanity emerge. Seriously, fuck those guys. They have their own goddamn printer.

New office chair for the dev on holiday, no expense spared.

FUCK!! It's been 3 days in the new office.
Can't find a single to rant about.
Why is everyone is so fucking nice??

Me at the office, Boss calling me by phone..

Boss: Hi, I need a new Build of XX Android app for another client.. set the base address at x.x.x.x and send me an APK file

Me: OK, I will do it.

Boss: can you do it in 5 minutes?

Me: Sure, it's simple..

Android Studio: You think it's simple !
* Indexing Files
* Sync Project
* Gradle Build
* Indexing....
* Some f* tasks

Oh kill me now !!

i've been working with my plan to make a small software development company for a while now.

time to implement my plan
Finalizing my plan: Done
Quit my job: Done
Ordering Office Requirements : Shipping
a Server : Shipping
Dozen of Rubber Ducks : Shipping
etc...

so here it is, Day 0; repurposing my bunker to be my small office !

new life, new hope

Me: Sitting in beanbag chair in development office, using closed macbook as a plate for a large walnut-brie-honey-rucola sandwich, honey dripping all over the aluminium top.

New manager (well, he's pretty old, but newly hired): "I don't think you're allowed to eat near the computers"

Me: "And I don't think you're allowed in my dev cave".

*Put macbook to the side*
*push him out of the office*
*close sliding door*
*close blinds*
*sit in beanbag chair*
*eat sandwich*
*lick honey from macbook*

I'm sorry, coworkers. Two weeks of writing MySQL queries made me a bit feral.

"I really love the new $3k Fortigate firewall switch you bought for the office after our chat about security but it doesn't change the fact that you can access any computer in the company using Password123" - me

7 years of "learning" "IT" at school...
What have I learned: Excel, Word, PowerPoint....
School started. I got the new book and we are doing more than MS Office!

We are making a website
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
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...
With Wix!!!!!!???!?!!?!!
Fuck me!

Fuck open office spaces.

A few months ago I landed a super sweet job as a senior full stack developer, mainly going to work with their Python microarchitecture. The company pays well, has a sweet balance between freedom and responsibility, 30 days vacation etc.

During the recruiting process they walked me around the office that was super cozy with 14 devs in on large room and 10 people from marketing in another. They also mentioned that they would move and merge office with operations and customer service (around 100 more people) in a few months.

Life was good in the old office, I thought that this is the company where I will work for a looooong time.

Now we are in the new office and its fucking shit. No walls or FUCKING CEILINGS between departments. Right above my head there is balcony with customer service talking loud as fuck 24/7. Everyone that is not a developer is just so fucking loud.

I have to use earplugs AND earmuffs to get silence, or blast my ears with way to loud music. Every day around lunch I'm completely done mentally.

I know I'm extra sensitive to noise because of my ADHD, but seriously who the fuck thought this was a good idea?

All the devs have told our boss what needs to be done. If they listen i don't know. In the meantime I will start looking for a new job....

Today I got to my new office. After booting my PC I noticed, that my phone-client isn't working.

I wrote an Incident to our helpline, telling them my phone isn't working.

After one hour I got an mail:
"Dear XYZ, we couldn't reach you at your phone. Please call back so we can fix your issue"

FUCK YOU WTF! ARE YOU GUYS RETARDED? READ YOUR FUCKING INCIDENTS! MOTHERFUCKING CUNTS!

I guess i have a new debug buddies at the office

So our company hired a new COO few months ago, and he oversees digital department as well

recently he called the digital department into his office to talk about a new campaign for a client, and client's mascot is a ladybug, so he goes like this

COO: So i was thinking, we need to make people more aware about the new branch opening

COO: I have a creative / innovative idea, we probably can get an award for this and I'm sure client will be really impressed with this. Why don't we put ladybug​s on Google homepage, just walking around flapping their wings and stuff, i mean everyone visits Google right ?

Our Team: awkwardly looking at each other
Me: 😐😐😐😐
( I was confused what to think )

Then our designer calmly explained him why it wouldn't work while we were trying our best not to laugh

how the fuck someone like him manage to stay alive all these years and become a COO, i mean he doesn't have to know it all but damn this is common sense

This is a brand new office on the building across to ours

Friend: Why don't you just quit your job?
Me: I want to, I just can't right now, it would cause too many issues.
Friend: oh really? Will it affect your health insurance or pension?
Me: No my office is the shipping address for my new iPhone. Haven't got it yet.
Friend: Oh ffs .... seriously?

There's a fancy new coffee machine in the office. When it breaks, it displays java exceptions on the screen. 😂

Battery testing new app at work. Boss wants us to test Pokemon Go for comparison. I get to leave the office for 2 hours to catch Pokemon and get paid...

*While I was working from home this occurred*

New Accountant: How come Dev gets the nicest chair in the office?

IT: He brings his own chair because he doesn’t like the ones we have here.

New Accountant: How come I don’t get a nice chair?

IT: If you want a nicer chair either ask your department manager to buy one or if that doesn’t work you’re welcome to bring in your own

New Accountant: I shouldn’t have to bring in my chair from home! I want a nice chair like Dev has but I don’t want to spend the money to buy one as nice as his and my department manager said we don’t have the budget to buy one either!

IT: He buys them from a used office warehouse for pretty cheap actually, cheaper than what the company pays annually to rent these chairs from what I’ve heard. He has 3 more at home. You should ask him where he gets them from.

New Accountant: He should give me his chair! He mostly works remote anyway!

*This resulted in my being asked to come into the office to remove my chair because it was “upsetting people” in the office*

New set up at the office. I'm in love 😍

!rant
Handed over my keys and computer to my boss a moment ago and left the office for the last time. Spent 3 years there, and most of the people there came with me from my previous job I spent another 3 years at.
Feels heavy to leave a bunch of great people.

Two weeks until I start my job as a developer at a game company though.
Took me 6.5 years of work to finally get there.
Super stoked!

And I won't lie, some stickers on my new work laptop would not be a bad thing.

Just got the new office update and damn the new icons are hideous

!rant

Office invested in a new coffee machine. With actual coffee beans.
It also makes hot chocolate.

Worst disturbance while working?

Some of my faves:
- Mgr flying his new $400 drone around the office (hitting walls, ceiling, etc). I mentioned the price because he crashed it a week later (un-repairable kind of crash), so I didn't feel too sorry for his loss.
- Mgr trying out his new blowgun and blowing darts at a cardboard box down/bewtween the cube hallway (where anyone could walk out of at any time). We would hear the "pfffft" and a loud 'Yea!'.
- Mgr would walk by a cube entry-way, fart, and walk away laughing.
- Mgr called me into area and his desk+the floor area around his desk was covered in peanut shells.
Me: "Wow, you got a mess here."
Mgr: "Yea, got tired of trying to hit the trash can. Maintenance will vacuum the office this weekend."
The mess was one thing, but what disturbed me the most was this asshole thinks Maintenance-Jim has nothing better to do than clean up after this so-called adult.

Karma kicked in and an hour later the owner's wife (we're still a family owned company, so he+his wife are on friendly basis with everyone) stopped by to say hi and walked in on the mess.
June: "What do we have here!?"
Mgr: "Oh...um...uh..I was eating a few peanuts and putting the shells in the trash can and accidentally knocked it over. I was on my way to get the vacuum cleaner."
June: "Hmmm...this looks like more than a few. *You* clean it up right now and *never* let me see this again!"
Mgr: "Yes..yes ma'am...right now.."

Whole office heard the exchange and it was frickin' awesome.

Gotta do this at my office, especially at the cube where the "New Guy" in the team sits!

--Evil Laughs--

A few years back we hired a new guy for our sales department. He worked with us for less than a week and seemed pretty normal.

Until one day he came into my office sat reeeeally close to me and actually whispered into my ear: "last night around midnight i was a bit hungry so i got up and fried some sausages".

Then he looked at me with the weirdest grin ever and just sat there for like 15 seconds not moving a muscle.

😳

What I did wrong during my home office cleaning session this morning:
- put soap on my mouse mat
- snapped my enter key
- vacuumed up my F8 key
- absent-mindedly cut my ethernet cable
- lost my zero key
- dropped my backup hard drive (data was recoverable, but I need a new drive)
- lost one of the nose pads on my glasses
- got a cocktail stick stuck in a USB port
- exploded my mouse by using the wrong type of battery

Things I did good:
- nothing

Yet another Windows rant but boi Redmond deserves it.
For our new office I took a leap of faith ordering 15 iMac 5k. (btw HP quoting us €10k each pc for same spec).

There are two young guys insist on Windows. Good for you so we ordered two top of line surface book. He religiously unwrapped and said “who want apple trash more than this beauty.”

It’s been 5 hours that shit spent on “Getting Ready Windows for you”, once done it prompted another updating at 4% until we all left work.

So this morning I’m ordering another two MBPs...

This fucktard of a 'stick that facility management up your arse' manager.

He insisted 'no cooling required. Trust me'.

While we insisted 'how dare you to asume our servers temperatures'!

We moved our servers to a new /tmp/office/ yesterday. Was quite fun, until we saw this...

Doorhandle is hot as fuck, 50 degrees air temperature, all servers in heat error state. Thank you, you damn fucktards! Take this cactus 🌵 and stick it up your arse!!

Can't work like that.

new office with an old friend :)

We've started a new betting system in our office. Every time you lose a bet, you have to optimize atleast one project for Internet Explorer 😂

View from new office. Another distraction... :D

Today we moved to a new office in the next building.

It is a very big upgrade, since it is bigger and nicer.

So I ask where the bathroom is and go in the direction told, and the bathroom is so nice! Huge mirror, everything is clean and new.

On the way out I find that it was the girls bathroom....

Hi everyone, I'm new here but I liked the posts so I thought I'd chip in. Here's a picture of my home office.

I'm currently brushing up on SQL and Java in my internship while I await graduation at the end of the year. Java>C# IMO. C++ is my first love but nobody wants to hire for it anymore.

To everyone who's worked in Java, Eclipse or Intellij IDEA and why? (I mostly use Eclipse because the internship requires it).

I hope to have fun here, so please give me a warm welcome or a rant.

Part of the new hire process was all salaried employees had to work all hourly position jobs for a day (over a several week period, not all in one day) to really understand what we do.

I once hazed a new network admin who was working in the call center and I sent his station a pop-up message:
“Ha! Fire me will you!! I planted this virus and if you don’t enter the password in 60 seconds I will erase the database.” The pop-up had a counter counting down from 60.

This was over the lunch hour, so all the supervisors and managers were away and ‘Mark’ in a panic ran into our office (I was hiding under my desk)

Mark: GUYS!!...GUYS!!!....OMG!….Where the frack is everybody?!!!”

He runs out.

I peek out the door window and about a second later he’s running down the hall with one of the vice presidents. Mark shows the VP the message, VP looks over at our office, sees me…laughs and walks back to his office (not saying much to Mark).

Mark not knowing what’s going on watches the counter…3...2…1….
”Just kidding. Welcome to the company!”

Ahhh…the repeated sounds of “You son of a -bleep-!!” never sounded so sweet.

The joyful moment when you can finally afford to buy a new piece of furniture for your office.

My new home office. !!

Walked into the office in the afternoon, everyone was kinda panicking
Asked what was going on, well, the ticket system is not working anymore, can't put in any new tickets.
So I started to look for the issue as well, checked the system and... The last tickets' IDs were at ~32k. Ha. Looked into the source code and, sure enough, they used a data type with an upper limit of... 32k. So when trying to get a new ticket ID it just crashed and burned.
Quickly changed the data type and stopped the office panic in around half an hour.
Memorable not because of how tough the bug was, but because of the impact and the simplicity of the fix

First day on new job. Hardware guy comes to my office, says "Hi, here is your computer" (no eye contact) and leaves a pile of boxes on the floor.

A few hours later I finished building the computer from scratch lol.
Not sure if it was some kind of test or just him being weird 😂

New office.

They gave me a fucking Mac. It's a fucking nightmare to operate this machine efficiently and effectively.

Piece of shit. I had given a preference of Windows and yet they shoved this PoS in my face.

What a cognitive load to deal with on constant basis.

so my mom wanted to write some word document, but she didn't use her laptop for like ~5 years, it didn't boot up so she asked me to fix, now here is what I found :
>the laptop had a 240 gb hdd
>the hdd was literally broken
>bought her a new 500 gb hdd
>installed windows 7
>took 10 mins to install
>took 19 minutes to boot up
>removed windows 7
>installed win xp
>took 30 mins to install
>took 3 minutes to boot up
>opened windows
>checked pc specs
>see picture below
>[insert wtf gif here]
>installed drivers
>took 20 minutes to install drivers
>[insert epic music here]
>tried installing office 2016
>insta regret
>tried installing office 2010
>memory farted and I couldn't even move the cursor
>installed office 2007
>mom started writing document peacefully
>after 2 hours bsod
>mom asks me to fix
>opens laptop to check internal components
>the cpu had a black hole inside
>the fans weren't working due to the circuit being burnt for some reason
>kills laptop
>kills mom
>kills self
>live peacefully in hell

First day at new office?

Setting up email rules

Just moved into our new house today and my wife gave me an early Christmas present. Really just completes my new office. This beautiful lamp is touch activated on each individual light and each light is individually dimmable by touch as well. 😍 had to share

yesterday my boss called me to his office.
(him) - Please close the door
(me thinking) - My God, this is gonna be serious. He never closes his doors
(him) - It's a common practice here that we buy a new laptop for new colleges. What kind of laptop do you have?
(me relieved and excited) - Well it's 4 years old shit, 8 Gb of RAM, slow
(him) - Great we'll buy you this i7, big SSD, 32 Gb of RAM + new monitor, mouse and keyboard.

I was excited as fuck.

Until he sent me what he bought. It's much worse laptop than that I have 😑 Only thing that is better is it has 16 Gb of RAM.
I guess I'll just take that RAM off it and put it in my machine (if it is DDR3, God please may it be DDR3)

Since my last update, I got a new screen. We reorganised the office, so I got a new spot in the office (corner with no one behind me). Got a monitor stand.

I’m costing the Norwegian people so much. All this stuff I request, is financed by the tax kroner.

That moment you leave the office for the last time in 2018.

FAWK YEAH!

What a year it’s been, from learning new platforms, to developing never ending changes, to breaking production at Christmas time, and finishing the year at the peak of purchasing period on a couple of websites with no reason to care what happens for several weeks all while absorbing extra projects from resigning co-workers.

*Turns on autopilot and walks the fuck out*

From one exhausted dev to the rest of you, enjoy the holiday break!

New shirts in the office. Making Friday even better!

Moved in to new house, finally have myself a room for an office. Started to deck it out and the wife asks if we can find matching chairs, one for her, one for me...

It's more than an office, its supposed to be my man/dev cave!

Finally got myself setup in my new office today, before there was three of us cramped into a tiny 3mx4m office, now only two of us in a much larger office.

Since 4 weeks i have during work my noise cancelling headphones on, thanks to the new open space office.
I don't even hear my phone ringing 😂

#TheCoronaEffect

Before Corona: (Work From Office)

Boss: Let's have a call.
Me: Sure, allow me some time I am assisting the team on a new feature in the app.
Boss: Ok, ping me as you get free.

----------------------------------------------------------

Now: (Work From Home)

Boss: ***Calls for the 15th time in a day...***
Me: (With Bleeding Ears) Yes sir, am here...!
(Having to pick up every single time as he knows you've got nowhere to go 'coz the whole city is in LockDown)
Boss: ***Talks for another 1 hour with screen share***

My Boss is a bigger threat to my health than Corona now!!!

#GoCoronaGo

This is more on work and life balance.

1. Don't do hard work, but do 'Smart work', else you will end up burn yourself 100%.

2. Don't think your manager is your guardian angel, even though it seems like sometimes. He has his own goals to achieve.

3. Spend considerable time daily in and out of office/work, for your own development/improvement.

4. Learn new languages and technologies.

5. Stop making things perfect, 'good' is enough.

and it goes on ............

That moment when you walk into the office on your first day, while setting up your desk they ask you which mouse you would like to use, and you respond "oh no thank you I prefer my trackpad" and the whole office stops what their doing and gives you that look...

I wonder why new Office icons look like a ripoff from stack exchange....

Some 'wk306' highlights from different people:

Walk around the office in his underwear, because he forgot he left his trousers in the bathroom

Run a red light outside the office due to not wearing his required glasses. When questioned by co-workers, replied "I don't follow those facist rules"

Asking if we work less will we get paid more, because the project will take longer to do (while in a startup with no funding trying to secure some)

Tell a senior dev to stop testing in his spare time, as we won't be able to release on time if he keeps finding critical security bugs

Telling me "your timezone is not my concern", when asking for help with new tooling so we don't have to be online at the same time

Blaming my team for requesting too much help, leading to his team missing deadlines, in a meeting with very senior managers. When the reason we were requesting help was the handover doc we were given was filled with lies about features being finished and "ready to ship" and lacking any unit tests

Being accused of bullying and harassment to the CEO, because someone asked "did you follow up with X about the partnership they emailed us about". The person who was responsible, forgot 4 times, and saw it as an "attack" to mention it in team meetings

Telling an entire office/building mid November they've secured funding for at least the next year, then announcing in January after the Christmas break that its cheaper to move to India, so they are closing the office in 30 days

!rant

New mobile coffee van appears at our office today. When he realises we're developers he knows he has hit the jackpot. 😀

Doesn't it look like Bixby(New virtual assistant from Samsung) logo got inspired a bit from Clippy(Microsoft office assistant)?

Or is it only me?

The company got a new office just in time for the "company summit".

I checked out the address on Google maps. It's a cinderblock building with the number spraypainted on the side, a battered cyclone fence in front, a cyclone gate off to the right side (apparently falling off) leading to a random battered shed, and immediately on the left is a dental office with bars on the windows. Also, the fence has spikes on top.

I'm terrified.

In this episode of "office drama", we have the head secretary asking me if I want to contribute to the gift for the baby of some guy I don't know well. (I'm new to the office btw)
When I refuse, saying that I don't know him well enough to want to contribute, she says "that's okay, but we won't be collecting for a gift for you once you have a baby. We want to be a '''team''' ".

😐

I just said "that's fair", but maaaaaaaan! Since when is it okay to demand that someone participates in a gift, while ignoring their social or financial circumstances? 😤

Update: went to her office to talk about this "being a part of the team" and clear things up. She said, and I quote "I don't have time for this". And by that, swords have been unsheathed. I guess there is no pleasing some people.

Going down to the new office tomorrow to choose my new nap ro... Err, I mean, our server room.

!rant

Finally back to coding at the new office. Better connection speed. Wider space. Own toilet.

Guess you won't see new posts from me anytime soon.
Just gonna enjoy the rest of your miseries from my chilled desk.

😎

My 1 year old waddled her way to where I am sitting to my computer and gives me this. I start a new job this Monday and have been really nervous, I always get nervous when I start a new job. Guess who is going to be sitting with me at my office this monday? :)

our HR made a survey about home office and how people think about coming back to office in the future. Shortly afterwards, our new CEO sent us an e-mail saying that he would like to see more employees in the office again soon. After all, it is paid for and must therefore be used. Of course, it's better for everyone to commute 2 hours to work every day, and last year home office worked well for everyone.
Personally, I can do without constantly sitting with my colleagues in a noisy office where 10 people are on the phone at the same time.

Bonus: In his opinion, software is better when it has more LOC.

Bonus2: Last working day for me is end of September. After that I start my new job with 43 days vacation per year :D

Starting to work with a new senior designer in the remote office (red). Spent 4 days explaining to him that we need .png's in multiple sizes for the app, trying to teach him to use Zeplin to let us export them. Everything failed, his manager told him to just send us the .png's via slack ..... has he seen a computer before?

In a moment of boredom I decided to pen test the new system I've been writing on the live server. Ran sqlmap but forgot to proxy my connection.

DDOS protection kicked in and blocked the entire offices connection to the server, had to drive home quickly to use my home internet to un-blacklist my office ip. 😂

fuuuck, I overslept today, and I have to introduce a new team nember today and I will be too late in office because of that.

OK so i take a shower, and brush my teeth and get my clothes on in under 5 minutes (which is actually very fast for me), run for my train, just made it into it, get to the next station where I have to switch trains, and then it hits me again: 8 minutes delay, OK that made it even more bad than it was vefore, because I will miss my train on the next station where I again have to switch.

I will now end up 45 minutes too late in the office, only because I overslept. I hate me

Was feeling like a boss in new office after fixing a major bug.

Yes, the bug was fixed. Only half of the program doesn't work anymore.

I’m a civil engineer working in IT and this is the view from my new office, watching the construction work every day and think did I take the right decision.

Did I every tell you about that time I scared a boss (not mine, he was in the room) so much, that he was to scared to enter my office for the next couple of weeks? 😅
Good times 😊

Tl;dr: He was the reason I was working at max capacity and then he started complaining that shit wasn't working.

Full story:
I was out of office, building up a new site. I was the only IT working that day, others were out on vacation.
Suddenly I start getting flooded with calls from other sites, that nothing works. It is so bad, that my boss can't reach me on the company phone, so he calls me on my private phone.
Apparently all the servers are down.
So me into a taxi, heading for the main office.
When I get there I just start booting the servers on by one, because they didn't like that they had lost power. While I'm working, my boss is standing there, ready to help.
Another boss enters the office and goes: "I can't access Navision". To which I quickly reply something like: "Well everything is down, I'm the only one who can fix it and I'm working as fast as I can".
Two weeks later, another employee tells me, that the other boss has been running all his equipment off a battery backup, since the failure, because his power cord failed. He spilled a cup of coffee on it and therefore was the reason, that all the servers lost power (bad setup, I know). And apparently I was so frightening that he didn't have the courage to ask for a new power cord 😂
Best thing was that my boss never stopped me or told me that I did something wrong.

Our sysadmin just wrote our new work account passwords on our office whiteboard, visible to everyone... Now that's how you create chaos

Today, a team mate has sent me this picture: he found this Olivetti in the street, near a trash bin. He will take it to the office next Monday so we are going to troll other team mates with this new and fantastic mechanical keyboard!!

Past few weeks, I have started to work late night and sleep whole day. I go to office at around 7pm and returns back next day 8-9am. I found it super productive.
But, my manager wasn't happy about it and now, she shifted daily scrum at 1 PM and emailed me to make sure I attend it daily.
Now, I have to fix my sleeping cycle... Nights are so great to work. Silent and nobody around.
Now, from tomorrow, I got a new challenge everyday to make it to scrum daily.

Best work prank?

Get a random friend to burst into my home office during a zoom call, wearing a ski mask, gun in hand, speak foreign language, and drag me out of the room. Have another masked friend go up the camera and threaten to kill me if my coworkers go to the police. Disappear for a week, then email my boss saying I need 100k or they’ll start killing my family members one by one, take the money, then go on vacation while I fill out job applications. Get a new job and repeat the prank every few months until I retire.

Late to the party. But renovation complete.

Presenting my new home office / bedroom setup.

👌

A client of mine kept getting hit with a ransomware that was spread over rdp. So I set aside this whole week going to different sites this guy owns. Setting up a VPN tunnel and showing them how to use it. So they didn't have to rdp anymore. No more having a server with rdp facing on the outside of there network. They were all linked in like they were in the same office. I traveled around 400 miles going to all these locations. I finally got it done went back to the main office to talk to the owner. Instead of a thank first thing they say as soon as I walk in is to revert it all. We are going with a different company and they are buying new computers and server from the other company. After he tells me that he then says but when the new computers come in will you come and set them up for us because we are stupid with computers.

I reverted the stuff and walked out. Didn't say a word to him. Didn't agree to set up the new computers. Why should I set them up. He just pretty much bent me over and screwed me out of a extra couple thousand dollars.

So after coding the first iteration of a big project on some whack office supplied logitech keyboard I rewarded myself with a new proper keyboard that suits my character. I am as happy as a kid on Christmas :)

Vortex Race 3 Brown Cherry MX

I was working with a guy 3 years ago, he was junior web developer. Lazy for work, watching YouTube and game streamers all day long at the office. Sometimes i was fixing his crappy code.
And ... one week ago I was surprised seeing this guy come to my current work office as senior web developer.
Im also new at this office and i had good impression i was working with professionals before this happened. Guess what... This guy hasnt changed much. Still writes crappy code , no idea of clean code at all.
I got concerns about my work place now :/ thinking to change it.

How to check devrant in the office.

Open devrant
Read rants
Smile to yourself
Refresh devrant
**no new rant
keep phone away for few seconds
Open dev rant again

Got new mug from office.😂😂

Rant for Indians

Who the hell gives you joining in the Diwali week. Half of the office has taken holiday so that they can go home. My orientation/induction might also get cancelled because of lack of personnel. And her i am stuck in a new city away from home for one of the major festival in India.

When you discover this new amazing programming language and play with it the whole weekend and then realize it’s Monday again and you need to go back to the office to work with some legacy GOTO spaghetti... 🍝🌧

Epic newb here. Like, can-barely-read-HTML new. But I'm curious and interested. I work in an office filled with very skilled developers, and I bring the human component to the operations. Not a day goes by when I don't learn something, or teach something. Sadly, that enriching experience accounts for maybe half an hour of my day. I wish it was more. Anyhoo, rant on, Wayne!

!rant

It's a non-working holiday at the office so I'm at home doing nothing. I asked my boyfriend what to do for the whole day then he said "Spend your day to something you really enjoy".

Ah yes!

So I'm building a new project. What an exciting day!

And I'm joining new company today!

I hate one guy in our office!!! 😡🤬
He is a very toxic person, but that was ok (more or less) till today.

Today I have had a videocall with a new team, PM and client, because I have ended the previous project and has been moved to a new one.

And this asshole has taken a purple pony(!!!) and touched my face with it few times while I speak with other persons via webcam!

I just lack of words to describe all my emotions about this situation 🤐
And he thinks it was funny!

People are incredibly rude and ill mannered.

New company stories.

Whenever I am in office and having a conversation with a person, someone randomly appears (like those annoying pop-ups on websites) and interrupts the conversation and starts with their own.

I don't understand why people don't wait for the conversation to be over, or ask for permission (in case it is urgent).

Such behaviour derails the entire thought process and breaks the rhythm.

It's just beyond me. How difficult it can be!!!

So I finally did it and quit my job.
The new company seemed to be a really realy nice place to work.
And yesterday I heard that they even allow one colleague to sleep 2 nights a week in the office because rents are high and he otherwise lives far away. They even bought a sleeping couch and a washing machine for him. O.O

can't wait to start to work there!

Who in their right mind though it would be a good idea to move the web development team to a new office without checking that the internet is connected.

What a waste of three working days.

And of course the project needs to be delivered by Sunday...

Woo, rant time.

I've recently changed jobs to a new company due to a number of factors at my old job. I didn't tell my old boss (let's call him X) my expected salary, nor did I tell him which company I was going to.

However, I've been informed by someone that still works there that X has been discussing my new wage in front of everyone; he was telling everyone that I'm going to lose money by moving job and that I made a stupid decision.
I didn't leave due to money, it was due to X's inability to take constructive criticism, the constant subtle sexism of the office and just a generally bad overall feeling about the job/office going forward. Yes, I will admit that money did have a minor part in my decision to leave but I didn't verbalise that to anyone in the office, and I made X aware that my departure wasn't to do with money. I left on good terms.

I feel as though it was wrong of X to talk about his opinions on my new job in front of my ex-colleagues and friends. I don't know, maybe this is the norm and I've just been living in a cave before this, or maybe my last boss was just a bit of a douchenugget. Has anyone else had this experience?

I've got to meet up with everyone from my last place tomorrow to properly say goodbye and things.. but I'm not sure how to approach my old boss when leaving drinks are held now. Should I say anything? Should I just act as though I know nothing about it?

What would you guys do in this situation???

Today I got fired (I work for a outsourcing company and was the client that "fired me") and the reason was that the work load was low.... funny thing is that they contested a new dev for my team and she is staying only because she is in the same office as the main team and I'm on a different office.

How fucked up is this?

The freaking furniture people didn't complete things on time and our business development department is still not finished. The freaking reception desk is not there yet.

Here I am going to my new office on Saturday morning. Not to code but to monitor those guys to get things done by today.

!rant

I started my new position in Ireland about a month ago (relocated from Switzerland) and it‘s amazing how awesome life can be despite working full-time..
I have a 8-5 job, I usually get home around 6PM and have 6 hours left for myself every evening.. no calls, mails or similar after I leave the office.
Im actually not allowed to do overtime..

Everyone in the company is super nice and the Irish people are so incredibly welcoming and are happy to help if you need something..

So thankful right now..

zero motivation for anything, i just want sit outside in the sun at the lake with ice cream and not in front of a screen. And not being bothered by the new vacum cleaner loud deep learning rig of the data science department in this open floor office.
I fucking forgot my noise cancling headphones. FML

Office survival tip #1: When in a new office with no kitchen, heat your food with the office heater.

How @JacoKotze and I are heating our food in our new office (no kitchen equipment or microwave yet)

#newlifenewhope -> update no. 0 / Day 0

it's about the end of Day 0, front office is taking shape. the pantry is cleaned.

can't wait to see how my repurposed bunker will look like.

Order and Shipment progress :
- My Server supposed to be arrive tommorow
- Rubber Ducks Package Delivery is accepted by courier
- 2 weeks before my Office Requirements Arrive

Further Update for my Little Office Installment will be tagged as : #newlifenewhope

Stay Tuned !

From the window of my new office I see a lot of chicks.

Literally, there’s an henhouse out there!

Closing on my new house today and this was in the office at the title company

Just moved into new "office" :D
It's not much, but it's an upgrade

So here is what happens. I have new guy in the office. He thinks he is a big shot or something. Our office time is 9 to 6, but no one comes in at that time.

This guy, he comes at 10:30 and I come at 11. I have been working as a senior dev for 2.5 years now and he is a fresher who joined as a manager which I am still wondering why.

And he tells me you are late and I inform the CEO about this.

One of these days I will tell him that brother the day you show the same commitment I have shown to the company or anything close to it, we will talk.

Waiting for the exact day.

Can we rant about coworking spaces?

I like the coworking office concept and I love this desk I have for myself, I like this building, the supervisor is sweet and I made new clients here...

But I hate one of my "neighbours".

We have several office rules and he constantly breaks them.

No music allowed without headphones. Nope, gotta listen to shitty radio straight from the smartphone speaker.

No loud conferences or phone talks. Nah, let's set the volume to the max. And leave the phone behind and let it ring loudly forever.

You can only occupy one desk unless you rent more. In comes his coworker who keeps occupying an extra desk for free and who's as loud as he is. And bring the kids because hey, growing up bored inside a office is good for them.

And today's newest: no eating in the office. Coworker brought her kid who set up a -dinning table- on the extra desk and began eating her lunch leftovers. It wouldn't have been so bad and I wouldn't have noticed except the office was overflowed with the stench of overheated pasta.

This is a big office. I had to open the windows. I can still feel the smell. It's nauseating.

I didn't say anything because it's not the kid's fault they didn't take her to the building's canteen space. But at the risk of making enemies where I shouldn't, I need to have a "fun" talk with someone.

When I arrived at my new job last year they were working on developing a large site using a live server with all the devs ftp-ing every change in the build process to test it. 😵

It was not uncommon to hear 'is anybody in the style sheet?' being shouted across the office!

Needless to say, I had to fix many bugs multiple times when my fixes were overwritten!

Downside of being a developer without design skills & creativity.

--

Yesterday, i created a simple food ordering app for our office. I shared it to my dev colleagues and got a decent feedback (except for the new hire). But when shared it to people like writers and graphic designers. I feel a bit off.

Graphic D: "The app should not use a blue color scheme. because blue is an UNAPPETIZING COLOR", "The yellow color is too vibrant"

Writers: They are blabbing about the grammar and spellings :(

New Hired Dev: Can you share me the codes?

** I always trying to learn how to do webdesign but i think its not really for me :(

I've got my new job less than a month ago. On this Monday i've got annoyed by the unhappy faces in the office and said to them, that i'll work from home. But instead I boarded a train from Zurich to Milan. Checked in to a really nice Milan coworking space called Login. And had some google hangouts meetings all while beeing anxious that some might get suspicious that I left the country. 😅

Startup rant ---

John and Bob joined a startup at the same day but they were in two different offices.

John joined the US office while Bob joined the European office (let's not share the country here ;) )
Both of them worked really hard, they worked longer hours, showed result and helped the startup to reach and get Serie A funds.

That seems good no? But let's step back, John was promoted twice and get more perks while Bob got only a salary raise that aligned him with the current market.

There are different reasons for this but the most important one is that the company is having two different cultures for the two offices.

What's funny here is that Bob effort is well known across the two offices and his contribution has made a huge difference to the company but unfortunately he wasn't rewarded for it.

So Bob opened a new window not in his office but in his browser to find better opportunities.

!rant

Bought myself a new chair from Ikea. Just finished assembling it.

😍😍😍

So it's done. I signed my new contract with my new company after I left my old job. Better contract level, better pay, better benefits (at my old office they didn't even give me a pc. I had to use mine..)..
But the sad/funny story is that my old boss do not talk to me anymore because he can't understand why I'm leaving..sooo mature!
I really don't care because actually he do not deserve anything from me, he's (and forever will be) an arrogant prig without humility.
The only regret is leaving the co-workers I bound with..but I'm sure we'll be in touch.
Yep.. maybe this is definitely a rant/story!
Wish me good luck for this new adventure!

Our (new job) dress code policy is "that's what the CEO wears, so you have to wear a shirt too", but not enforced while working remotely.

So, I'll never be in the office.

#LifeRightNow
- need to find a new place and roommates to live with
- my gf's father doesn't want us to marry.
- my joint family wants to get separated.
- my boss wants me to be at our primary office ( i work remotely ) asap irrespective of anything since it is our biggest production yet.
- i am about the least productive i can be from last couple of weeks.
- going through a serious allergic condition.

#FuckMyLife

I'm four months in my new job and I've done 5 days worth of coding. There aren't much projects coming to our office nowadays so I'm being paid just to log my hours.

Any of the ranters here have any small project ideas I can make to pass the time?

I've literally run out of things to make.

A 27" monitor with a 1080p resolution is a match made in hell. Oh the eye bleach. (At home I got 30" with 2k or 1440p resolution. Much better viewing experience.)

I'm having my first day in the office in the new job after two week of remote work. I think I will prefer working from home office definitly (even though the office coffee machine is nice).

It doesn't help that the internet connection in the office is 100 Mbit and at home I have 1 Gbit.

New office, same old Bruce

Ok I'm seriously getting sick of this shit, my new manager wants us to have the fucking 12 hour night shifts from the office for .....no reason??!! for her own fucking entertainment I suppose!

I knew the day would come where my happy times at the new job would be over, my target now is stay 3 more months so I've been there for at least a year then see what happens. fuck me.

Boss: oh so you are working on that unrealistic 3week project ? Let me also assign you some completely unrelated office work.
Me: But I'm a programmer, researching other companies and contacting them looking for new projects is not part of my job descrip...
Boss: oh don't worry I'm sure you'll do great!
Me: that's not what I'm sayi...
Boss: ok I have to go now, have it ready by tomorrow!
Me:(crying internally)...ok.

Im also getting scared easily programming new features in the dark office by night

deploy new version on the last 5 minutes in office

So we're looking for a new developer, my boss sends me an email with a subject "Intresting CV". It was for a office clerk who altered a Wordpress website for the company they use to work for

Fuck Monday and SAs... Just arrived at office and logged in:

Consider changing your password:

**Ok... Enters new password**

We're sorry your password is invalid

?????

Let's I already have a lower, uppercase letter, a number

....

Adds a symbol

**works**

Difference in security though? 0.... But now I have one more thing too remember...

So Microsoft doesn't ship the ODBC drivers for Access on their new distros of office because they run in an isolated environment... THEN WHAT GOOD IS YOUR FUCKING EXPORT TO ODBC OPTION IS. YOU'RE MAKING MY JOB SO MUCH HARDER THAN IT NEEDS TO BE.

This might seem like a dumb rant to have but I just started a new job, and I asked my boss about the Work From Home policy and basically, there is no work from home, at all. I'm bummed out because I got into a really good WFH rhythm at my last job and now I have to go into the office every day, even though I am stationed in a different city than the main company office anyway. I'm already remote! Why do I have to pay to come into work remotely anyway!? Argh.

Now, I started in a new position as a dev back in September 2020 - after some starting pleasantries like "how are you", "whats up", "how is your weekend" the working relationship with my office partner soured.

It started with asking me TOTALLY random questions while my headset was on and i was "in the zone". These were questions like: "where should I buy a car", "Why is the virus spreading so fast". I tried to answer politely but made it very clear that when the headset is on my brain and every fibre in my body is inside the code and f---ing it.

Then it escalated, she called me 9.30PM on xmas day and wondered if i needed the API we are using........ Which i most certainly did not.

Now she hates me because I asked to move to another office and was granted that request 15 minutes after asking....

newlifenewhope Update No.1 / Day 2

It's so hard to formulate company's Vision and Mission, even rubber ducks is not helpful. I need my vision to be unambiguous. this will take a while to finalize

My Server arrived and not opened yet
The Dozen of rubber ducks is delayed for another 3 days.

"Hey, we got this new untested artifact a few minutes ago. Can you deploy it to the 2500 POS in production and stay at the office in case something goes wrong?"

That moment when you take the time to explain the idea of camelCase variable naming as opposed to the Underscores to this hot new girl at the the office and she comes back to you showing off her handy work and you notice how her very first variable is named camelToe

I still can't get it why people looks at IT people as lowlife. If you need a new computer in your office I can get the right spec and help you to buy it. But moving the computer table is not my job 😠

So pretty much all my clients have decided they are done working or responding to emails until the new year. Normally this would be fine and dandy, but I work in an office that says I have to be there every day still, and all my projects are in a state of "Waiting for Client Approval" so I can't move forward on anything.

I've spent two days so far just staring at my work pretending to do things while browsing the web, but I'm losing my mind here pretending to work when I could be doing other things. I still have at least 4 days next week where I will be in the office hoping someone responds, either say something is broke or tell me to push it live so I can get my projects out of limbo.

My boss and I, with a normal morning greeting in slack

Me: morning boss, how are you?

Boss: very good and you?

Me: marvelous. hey boss, do you have a secret entry to your office? I didn't see you coming

Boss: hahaha, front door :| . And I greeted everyone too

Me: :( sorry

Boss: Microsleep 😂

Me: 😎 nope, extreme concentration

Me: it's a new development methodology, born from extreme programming

Boss: 😶

Had to change password on computer for administrative reasons (sysadmins and infosec make us change our pass every quarter). Changes didn't sync to everything so now I can't even log into my computer.
Need to go to the office tomorrow so some guy can type in an admin password on my pc and do stuff to it. If that doesn't work I will just be given a new laptop.

Seriously fuck this week

Today I don't have much of work. Should I :
1. Start reading about Machine Learning
2. Read and understand Rust( is it being used actively and does it have scope? )
3. Check out some new imnew-tryme.js framework.
4. Crib about my ex dating someone else.

Just visited my new office! Tech offices are the best IMO. Open office plan, fully stocked pantry, bean bags, and a lot of cool stuff. Wayyy better than my previous job where we literally had desks and a coffee machine.

I'm not a developer by profession and my home setup is always messy (where I develop personal projects) but I am an intern sysadmin so here is my office desk :) wanted to join the whole show your desk movement

Pardon me if the tags are not right. Im fairly new and mostly a reader.

I want to try something new: Code with libre office.

As much fun it is to code and create new features for users. Take a break from the computer and spend time with real people.

A few years ago I would stay at work to get tasks done. While everyone in the office would go home I would stay and finish some task. After doing that for a few months my wife started to yell at me.

It made me realize that no matter how important a new feature, a bug or optimizing code is family and the relationships you have are more important.

Late update to the party, but I’m temporarily occupying the newly decorated living room while my room / office is being prepared for a swish new look.

Obligatory code included.

Moving to a new office this week. The only chinese restaurant nearby is one of those where you get 5 times the amount of rice compared to the meat. Fuck.

Last week I had a meeting with a client at their office and I got an invitation to a BBQ with some other people that evening. So I went to that BBQ and when I wanted to leave he said we could go laser gaming in their building.
That was awesome!! 😱

So yeah, you could say I've made friends. Not only because of programming, but also in the process of getting a new project.

My business partner and I started working at our new office and this other guy who was our client and provided us Internet connection for very cheap price, asked us if he can come and hangout sometimes
My partner : yeah man, any time !!
That guy : thanks man
Partner : But only when we are not that busy and don't bring any other person unless it's a woman.
Me : what !!
My partner : what ?

So we do not have an amazing internet speed. Can you imagine the dread we feel in the office when a new xcode version needs to be used to have apps be accepted by apple again. For those uninitiated: update all ios devices. Update unity to work eith newest xcode. Update to newest xcode, update mac to newest osx to actually be able to update xcode. It takes FOREVER. If this meets you at 8am, you are not building today. You are done.

Well, this'll sound like my first rant but my boss did it again. working on implementing a new feature. but I got sick last week and took some time to recoup. well come into the office todat, tell him I'm going to finish it. he says okay. 3pm comes around and I go and ask him for some help on finishing it. he says "check out the repository, I already did it."

okay. I'm sick. you want it done. fine. that's cool. but you made me waste literally my entire workday doing something you knew was already completed? WTF?

My new wall decoration at the office:

A member of infra team:
"Hey, we are migrating to a Microsoft office tools and we migrated your google drive data to One drive"
I go and check the new One Drive account and it's empty. So I point that out and the reply was:
"You should export your files to a zip and then import them to One Drive"
I didn't want to waste my time showing him that he is just contradicting himself in less than 5 mn and in two nearly consecutive messages.
I need more patience.

Last day in the office. I started remembering good old memories. Felt nostalgic and doubted my new job as they were not giving rise as per my expectation.

Then, my manager comes up with his divine improvement in the good working site (not for me but for other dev).

I felt sorry for my fellow mates and started praising my new job.

My new home office.

I haven't posted on DevRant in a while so thought I would share my new home office set up.

My old set up was great. Dual screen standing desk, fast desktop and great monitors.

Since having a new baby a few months back, the home office is now a nursery. My only option is to sit at the kitchen table or stand in the kitchen (I prefer standing).

So here it is, my new office. Laptop on a kids toy box, fit snugly between chopping boards and tomatoes.

And hey, I don't actually mind at all, I love my family.

Just remember that when life gives you tomatoes 🍅 ...

I haven’t physically went into an office for over 4 years, I’ve always worked from home. Today I’m starting a new position because of how unreliable government work is and also it felt nice to go into an interview and them be like “I know you! You go by fyroc and you’re the one who made the open source video streaming application!”

Now that it is 6:30 in the morning, I’m thinking ive made a mistake. I really wish I could be sleeping in like I’ve done every day for the last 4 years.

I lost my bike key in office yesterday and searched hell out of everywhere like in office, in my bag, in others bags (never know who can prank you), even we were searching in everyone's drawer but we were unable to find it so we went out an checked if I dropped it near canteen or anywhere out in office area using mobile flashlight at night for like 2 hours. So we just lost hopes and went to home by bus.

So today we went to shop and bought the new lock assembly and while we were heading back to office our QA called me laughing and telling "we found it, it was stuck in your chair and it fell out while the cleaning guy was cleaning it.!"

Luckily the shopkeeper took lock assembly back as it is laughing and gave us full refund.

It happens some times. not actualy their fault.

Today i reached office on almost lunch time. and i saw our new intern(3 members) team trying something on same PC, something in like css file. (Helping each eachother).

Yes i Forgot to mention that they were supposed to finish that page-task yesterday (in angular app).

When i asked them about issue.On which i got to know that they were trying to apply css on class name. But could not since Morning.And when i saw code, It was something like this....

Yes "cls_model" is css class

Two new Laptops arrived at our office today. Tried to install Manjaro on a USB with different Windows Tools because Windows Laptop was the easiest to access. Nothing Fucking worked!

Searched and found a Linux laptop.
Used dd
First try success

dd is love ♥️

What are the chances that you get busted by your manager and 3 team leaders you personally know when you are going to a job interview?

We have poor men’s silicon valley near universities. Our company’s one office moves to another university. By the one in a million luck, interview takes at the same building where our next office of my current company will be. Managers and team leaders are there to inspect the new office. I enter the building, see them near elevator. One of them see me, with panic i wave my hand to him. There is a distance of ten meters, I hide behind a column. The team leader who sees me waving thinks I am with them to inspect new office. He asks others why am I not coming with them as I learn later. I can not pretend to play along and catch up with them, due to panic and time of interview is soon already. They get into elevator and finally I dont have to hide anymore 😂.

I got into interview and c++ exam with that physcology. Little did they knew that I just completed CPP PRIMER book. I both rock interview and exam but lets see if they will return with a job offer. What a rollercoaster of emotions.
Note: I am on mobile now so can not give more juicy details for now, fingers are tired.

"Why are you sometimes late?"

Because your promised office was always late. Had to commute 2 hours and work for almost 10 hours in weekdays just to sleep for 4 hours.

You said that the new Office will be in August. Now it's October and it's still half-baked.

Learn Empathy first

Today I'm picking up our new network gear for our new office. Exciting!

So, I was buying a new WiFi connection, had some doubts about the speed, visited the Regional Office Incharge for a demo... Asked him the speed... Dude didn't know the difference between MBps and Mbps... Pretty much gave up on the service provider.
How the fuck people hire such dumb fucks.

Having a possible new client come in our office and they wanted to see our system. I ask the sales guy what he thin kthey wanted to see.

Day before:
Sales: They do a lot of projects, so if we could show them our rollout system that would be great.
Me: We don't have one....

Needless to say I was up all night and it still turned out as an amazing feature that we use to this day.

I have a really old Toshiba NB200-10P notebook with Intel Atom CPU and 2 gigs of RAM and 32 bit architecture... It was made for Windows XP, and now it barely runs Windows 7... So I'd like to give new life to this old piece of hardware with Linux (for basic tasks like Office, and maybe coding with Notepad++)...
I really like Manjaro, but after they ditched 32 bit support, the Manjaro-32 community project seems a bit unstable...

So, could you devs please recommend some reliable - and somewhat good-and-simple-looking - Linux distros?

Still not sure about this new guy, not trying to be rude but everytime we're talking about code he says shit that makes me wonder how he got hired. (btw he is hanging with the IT department all the time) He's a very nice guy, but talks massive shit when it comes to bugs/new features/etc.

Should I have a look at his pc to see what he's doing when in office or is it none of my business. Help me out here, I'm really curious but don't care if he's a fake at the same time lol.

Got a new guy sitting in the office. He is nice to talk to and easy to work with. But when he codes for himself behind his screen and something is not working he moans and bitches in a very whiney voice. That whiney tone is so insanly annoying. Sounds like a young dog is mistreated...

So I landed a senior linux admin job in August, moved to a new city, and signed a 2 year contract for them to pay my moving expenses. I took an employee survey in October, not knowing anything. As a department (all ops and devs), we reviewed the results as a whole with HR.

Now HR is coming to our remote office tomorrow (4 hours away).... to be continued...

First day back from holiday.
CEO announces everyone the pandemic is over and everyone has to return to the office.
Talked about how good it is to come and crack a joke with a colleague and that they care about our wellbeing.
I have barely been able to even focus on work because of all the chaos in the company since the beginning of the year (many interviews for hiring new devs, company events, meet etc.)
Colleagues talking about the fact that nobody can work from the office given all the chaos in the projects and nobody will come because they can't fire us all.
I have to answer to an outsourcing company today for a new fully remote full stack .NET developer position for the same pay, but might be risky in terms of what I can actually deliver in terms of code.
What advice can you give me? Jump the boat or not?

Discovering that all the coffee machines are out of service....|| there's no coffee machines on your new project office..

All my seniors in office approving my brand new created UI/UX
For a young professional like me, Happiness!! 😎😇

Fuck this shit
The company that I work moved to a new office 5 months ago and my laptop never worked in the corporate wifi.. they said that was necessary a full format.
Today they go it, formated 2x still this shit don’t work, my team leader asks every hour hey What’s up? And I just in the sofa playing games on my mobile phone 😅😅😅😅since 9am, now 1pm 😑🔫

Ok...... first day in office at a new tech company

since 9am till now 15:42 (CAT) I haven't done anything besides sitting on my computer and googling shit
and everyone at the office is busy with their business and avoiding me

Used to have FiOS at the office. Apparently someone thought we were having "issues" with the connection, so for a week we were sharing off a neighbor's connection while they found a new vendor and got it set up.

...we're now on Cox.

hey do you know if there is a JavaScript libary for naming newly created files acording to user convention? Instead of "Unamed file".
Like [DATE]_[0000]_[NAME]_[SIZE].[Filetype] --> 20210708_0001_Pictureofme_1000x1000.jpg

There is a brand new service of the swiss post office that scans all your mail. But in the app it says only "unnamed document" for each new letter.
I'd like to suggest them, that you can set up a naming convention for each new pdf to my liking.
thank you 🙂

Mum's new office cat (Tony) is fond of mice..

A 20-Something: “Hey, why aren’t you dressing up on spirit week decades dress theme days in the office this week?”

“Because I lived in all those decades and my childhood is not a costume.”

“Okaaaay…”

“Because when we dressed up for spirit week in high school we nerdy kids would always get made fun of by the jocks and cheerleaders because we didn’t get the memo that spirit week was only for the cool kids. I have trauma I’m still working through because of that.”

“Geez, I…”

“Look, I got rid of all that shit years ago. Now I’m supposed to go to a thrift store and spend money I earned here for real world needs on 4 new sets of clothes I will wear one time each? That’s literally my gas money to get to this office in an inflated economy. No.”

Me. In my head. Coming up with things to explain myself when I show up at the office dressed like it’s a regular day.

First day at the new internship. Boss man is pretty nice, but there is a language barrier I have to overcome. I'm supposed to be given a laptop, but the IT guy haven't arrived yet. Good thing I brought my own. I have been seated in the corner of the office, away from the rest of the developers, whose names I already forgot. Apparently I'm going to be doing miceoservices, but I have no idea how.. Am I the only one this has happened to?

New floor opened in our office building last month or so.. they are filling it and now there is lack of chairs. So we typically can pay musical chair @office. This is my wallpaper made using gimp

I work in a small scale company based on Kolkata, India. It's my first job and I have been working here for last 6 and half years. Now I am the technical lead there.

I love my job. I love taking new challenges which I need to solve on my own (most of the times). My working hours are 9am to 6pm. Hardly I have to stay late at office. Even if I have any client meeting after 6, I do it from home. I am never tired on Mondays, I love to join my office. I can do my personal projects after reaching home, sometimes even in the office. All these goods come with a small price, I get less salary than my friends who are working on the MNCs (e.g. IBM, TCS, HP etc). They are frustrated though, with their jobs, with their bosses, with the long working hours. I am not. Sometimes I feel bad that I earn less. But that feeling doesn't stay much longer. It goes away whenever I join the office and get a new thing to do.

I have rejected offers from many companies. That includes all the major MNCs working in India. I feel bad about that sometimes, just like currently I am feeling. One my friend (a really bad developer) is roaming in the New York city, he is there for an onsite project. I know I can't go their, at least now. And that feels bad.

What should I do? Does it make me an idiot to stay in a company for more than 6 years? Should I switch and join an MNC like everyone does? I am confused. Pretty confused.

I come into the office today and a new guy is sitting at my desk. alright, I introduce myself and explain this is my desk (btw I work in an office where some workers share a desk, me being the most senior tech the desk is reserved for me) and he gives me a dirty look, gets up, and doesn't say anything. could you be more of an asshole?
has this ever happened to anyone else ?

new guy starts last week. we rearrange office this week and some how he gets a window seat... WTF

Hey DevRant, I'd like you to meet "Marketing Brandon", his favorite daily activities include:

- asking me when that landing page is going to be ready

- asking how to support a customer on live chat even though he chose to assign the ticket to himself in the first place

- explaining how important social media is

- telling me he's working as fast as he can on some website copy I need and then sitting and composing tweets for 40 minutes

- asking if I can "just real quickly when I get the chance" implement a huge new feature for our users

- announcing to the entire office that he "has to leave early today" because the pet store closes at 5 and his ferret ran out of food yesterday

-.-

Does your office have a Marketing Brandon or similar?

three days ago my manager force me to complete a huge android app in one week, alone😑

this project contract signed three years ago😑 and my manager every day lie to contractor 👹

i`m new in office and now he wants fuck me 🙄

one week piece shit😡

so whats your idea to safe me😶

I am working my ass off for past couple of days to set up our new office. Today I got sick and sleep walked most of the time. Thank god my colleague was there with me. I'm home now and took a day off. 🤒🤒😞

alright so I've been at my new job for 3 days now. I got a complain that I was talking too much or was just in general to noisy.

I'm sure alot of other developers do this but when I am programming I talk myself through steps. I understand that this is an office environment and I need to keep quiet. But what I don't like is that other full time employees are being hypocritical.

One other worker had a 40 minute conversation, that I'm sure the entire office could hear, about the card game bridges.
Another was full on yelling at a team of devs over the phone about how they should get the entire team to work on a bug that he had found.

Bought myself a standing desk (one that rests on top of an existing desk), a new chair with good lumbar support and a few other office bits and pieces before the end of the tax year in the UK. I didn't think I'd be able to put them through my Ltd Co next year because of IR35 changes, but they have been delayed now.

The only thing I don't have yet at home is dual monitors. Otherwise the setup feels great. 30 Mins sitting followed by 30 Mins standing is doing wonders for my old back

I've just started my new career with a job in IT operations and I love it. After my electrical engineering degree I fell into a job as a website manager for a small company, I self taught html and css and I knew from then that I had found a job that didn't feel like a job. I'm​ excited to learn everything I need to know to progress as far as I can go in this industry. In my first few weeks at this new job (where i have my own office!) I've self taught python to create automation scripts for live projects, currently up to my eyeballs trying to figure out how to change the VB code for an excel module.....Then there have been so many other projects and bugs and I love it! Any tips and advice is greatly appreciated!

Today I talked to a cousin who works in Tata Consultancy Services (TCS) and he told me precisely why companies like Infosys, TCS and Wipro are moving towards ending WFH and mandating working from office.

He told me that post-COVID hires are treating these software jobs so casually, that they don't ask for leaves. They decide, on their own, when they want to take leave(s) without telling their team members.

They don't pick up phone calls when someone from upper management tries to reach out and they magically show up 3-4 days later. They don't value deadlines.

He told me that these companies do see the benefit of letting people work from home, but the new generation hires are creating a joke out of these positions and are taking blatant advantage of the situation. So they are forced to mandate working from office.