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EDIT: devRant April Fools joke (2017)
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@trogus and I have had an absolute blast working on devRant over the last year. However, we're strong believers in only working on a project if you're passionate about it, and over the last few months, we've sadly lost some of that passion so we've to announce, with heavy hearts, that we will both be moving on. We've decided to focus 100% of our energies on our next product, one which we are confident has billion dollar potential: Semicolon JS (http://semicolonjs.com).
We identified this sizable market opportunity as we were building out the new devRant website. Every JavaScript framework we tried left us wanting more. More efficiency. More elegance. More extensibility. That's what Semicolon JS is: more. More than a framework, it's a guiding philosophy. We believe that Semicolon JS will do for front end development what Material Design has done for user interface design. We're calling it Semicolon JS because even though you can still develop JavaScript without it, like a semicolon, we think it will soon become a standard and synonymous with quality JS development.
So comes the obvious question. What will happen to devRant? We wanted to make the announcement today because we will be officially shutting down the product in 30 days. So that gives everyone a full month to take in the last memories, look at those rants they really loved, and hopefully take some time to chat with @trogus and I about Semicolon JS and what we have planned.
With so many thanks and looking towards the future,
- @dfox and @trogus
160 -
*i am a teenager*
*i don't have credit card*
*can't buy anything*
*sees unixstickers is $1*
*pulls out a dollar from physical wallet*
*throws in the air*
*cries*53 -
Mother of god, was listening to the US govt hearing of zuckerberg about the recent scandals. The amount of very fucking simple obvious questions he 'could not' answer normally...
Govt person: Would you be willing to change Facebook's business model if this was required for the security and privacy of Facebook users' accounts?
Zuck: I don't understand your question.
Sorry, WHAT?! You don't need particular rocket science to understand what's being asked here. A combination of common sense and knowing the English language and English grammar in combination with maybe having finished some form of education should be enough to understand this ridiculously easy question.
Do you need it written on a golden plate with fucking blue letters in Facebook's font with the S letters as dollar signs while drinking 10 gallons of 'fuck every persons privacy'?!
Or maybe shoving it up your ass in the form of heated/glowing metal letters of 10+ inches in height? We could arrange that as well.25 -
Story time:
I was once working on a project that dealt with incredibly sensitive financial data.
We needed a client’s database to do a migration.
They wouldn’t send it over the internet because it was too big and they didn’t think it would be secure.
They opt to send it in the post on an encrypted usb drive.
(Fair enough thinks I)
USB drive arrives.
Is indeed encrypted.
MFW there’s a post it note in the envelope with the password on.
MFW this is a billion dollar multinational petrochem company.
MFW this same company’s ‘sysadmin’ and ‘dba’ once complained because a SQL script I sent them didn’t work - they’d pasted it twice and couldn’t work this out from the fucking “table already created” error message management studio was throwing at them.3 -
I was at my uncle's village.
Where getting internet is big thing,very far from main city.
I was talking with one shopkeeper.
I told him ,I am software developer.
He ask me questions that
"How can I improve my business using software?"
To help me figure out situation.
He told me problems he is facing right now.
Accounting/inventory management/contact's with big retailers.
He was so genuinely explaining it.
He don't want next billion dollar startup.
He want to solved his problem.
I am really impressed after that conversation because person who don't know what is excel is talking about ERP software.
I am going to develop that software.
#respect14 -
I made an account just to rant about this:
Currently working for a multi billion dollar company and this is the code some wanker decided to write! Now I get the pleasure of reading through and debugging it :D
29 -
Million dollar app/service idea.
Automatically reply to all LinkedIn inmail’s with “I don’t have any experience with that on my profile”.
Even without any NLP I estimate over a 90% success rate.12 -
A Geologist and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.1 -
When anyone tells you some app idea you have already heard a thousand times, do you throw a OutOfFucksToGiveException?5
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Is Microsoft going to ruin GitHub? NO!
Are we going to get amazing git integration in VSCode? ABSOLUTELY!
They're a 600 billion dollar company and they're one of the leading contributors to open source. They know the community they are handling and how fragile it is. This is just a developer trust move from them.
Stop pretending this is the end of GitHub, cause it isn't.23 -
Here's to all the people who are willing to spend 5$ at starbucks but refuse to spend a dollar on an app
5 -
You start new job and take over huge codebase without tests and documentation.
It turns out programming language is custom language made by previous developer who was the only one maintaining project.
There is no source version control.
Language runs in vm developed in Fortran.
No one cared to this day cause everything was working.
Project is critical for multi billion dollar corporation that sells medical equipment that keep people alive.
You can’t test your code on real devices only on virtual ones that were made using same custom language but you can’t find source code for it.
Previous developer accidentally died before you were hired.
You signed contract with penalties that will ruin your life.
Your first task is to add “small” feature.
Good luck !12 -
This user asked me to Provide my app to Him free of cost for one month (Cost is Around a Dollar for a Month service). I agreed. A few months Later he asked again and I politely refused. See what he did.
10 -
I can’t count money as quick. I don’t know how to operate a cash register. I’m bad at following small tasks in the kitchen. Ex: girlfriend yells at me for putting unstrained yolk in recipe (after straining it).
I can’t lift heavy stuff. Out of breathe helping my mom move. My uncle told me, “if you can’t do that, how can you work?” Then he touts his son around proudly for being in the army. I felt like shit for years.
My cousins told me to get a job at McDonald’s to learn the value of a dollar. I spent all this time studying and hadn’t found a single job at the time (not that I was looking). I was living off financial aid and some income from an app that sold for a dollar on the App Store.
I would mess up if I worked there. It was depressing guys. These people who worked at McDonald’s and Starbucks. It was like a cool club that I couldn’t be a part of! I wanted to be that smooth barista at Starbucks with a smug look on my face. Making coffee for all the ladies and writing hearts next to their name on the cup.
The responsibilities of going to work day after day and blowing your paycheck at a meal at Denny’s with your friends. Complaining about not getting enough hours and talking about adult stuff! Sigh sigh sigh. Oh and taxes! Let’s complain about taxes on a single W-2 just for the hell of it (not sure why they do this when you can file a simple 1040EZ) even though we get a refund.
Then..
After many paid internships (roughly 3), now I may be receiving an offer that is 100k+ with a 401k and all benefits I can imagine. Free food up the wazoo. Gym on site. Happy hour Friday’s.
I brag about taking a shit for an hour at work and coworkers don’t give a shit. Or taking a day off to do personal errands anytime.
Having my own place in a nice area (though the cost of living is enough to take care of 3 families in another state). Supporting my girlfriend through school and helping her with her dreams of art.
Going to fancy dinners and not worrying about the bill afterwards.
Accidentally damaging my 2017 Honda Accord and not giving a fuck because I can pay $900 for repair with less than a week of work.
But I can’t help but think that all this time..
I could’ve just quit and worked at McDonalds. I could’ve been one of the cool kids..10 -
Me: “Hi, Client. Did you review my proposal?”
Client: “Yes. You asked me to pay you using dollar bills. I found someone else who will do the work for mere pennies. Have a nice life!”
How does anyone make any money in web design and development anymore?14 -
The weirdest shit happened today. My 14 year old sister comes to me and asks me that she has a million dollar app idea that I should make her so that she can put it on the app stores and earn.
THE PLAGUE HAS SPREADDD😱11 -
Got a graphing calculator in high school for math class. Needed to memorize a bunch of formulas, saw you could program them in the calculator with BASIC. Sold the program to other students, profit.6
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1. Do you know why my computer is so slow?
2. What cellphone do you recommend me to buy? (They always end up buying the cheapest)
3. What do you do at work? (Answer: "I create applications". Anything more complex than that is not going to be understood or they will loose interest)
4. Something is wrong with the: [TV, Cellphone, microwave, etc.]. Could you please take a look? (Believe or not, if something works with electricoty, my family thinks I can fix it).
5. Is it true that if I send this WhatsApp message to all my contacts I will have more options?
6. I need to build an application that (pretty much The Matrix), how much time do you need and how much would cost? Don't you dare to give me wrong numbers. (We have to see the future)
7. (Continuing the previous point, a non-technical client) I don't think that would take so much time/money. (Every time)
8. I want to use the latest Front-End frameworks. I want to see all those beautiful animations in my page and that it runs smoothly... I also need that it runs in IE 5.
9. So, you have been working in the back end? If you don't have a screen to show to the client is like you didn't do anything in this sprint.
10. Why haven't you built and million dollar application? Everybody is doing that right now....
Yep, those are only a few downsides of our profession if we count family, friends and even co-workers. But I can't imagine myself doing anything else.6 -
Had a team with
1 entrepreneur who has this great billion dollar Idea and want me to sign an NDA before he can share the idea
1 newb who thinks that X language is the coolest because that's what everyone on Hacker news says
1 person who spends more time with other team than yours. I'll be fortunate to even spot him during the hackathon. Aka, "networking guy"
And then there's me, wondering why was I even here in the first place
Oh wait, that's the every hackathon I've been to.7 -
If I had a dollar every time a non software engineer used the word "just" in a sentence...
"Just" convert this Matlab code to C++
"Just" make it faster
"Just" have it done in a week8 -
1. Submit my resume, get an email asking to schedule an interview
2. Schedule the interview
3. One day before the scheduled time, I get an email saying that the interview is being rescheduled to another time two days later (no explanation for why they did this)
4. I clear out my schedule and wait for the interview call (it’s suppose to be at 2:30, but I wait like 15 minutes early because I don’t want to miss it)
5. I don’t get a call
6. At 3:00, I call the company and ask whats going on. They apologize and say my interviewer will call me back as soon as he gets back from lunch.
7. He doesn’t call.
8. At 4:00 I call them back. Apparently the guy who was suppose to interview me went home. I ask them wtf they are doing and if this is how they treat their employees. They said they would reschedule the interview and call me back once they did.
9. No one calls.
10. I wait a week, call them back, and am told that the funding for my position didn’t come through (what does that mean? You’re not hiring programmers to design the software for your billion dollar war machines anymore? Seriously?).
I’ve had it with this company. I don’t know if it was just this incompetent recruiting group or if this is a company full of scumbags, but I mean, really?1 -
If I had a dollar for every time IBM disappointed me, I would buy IBM and turn it into a company that sells dildos and fake poop so their product would be more up front and direct.3
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I hate how willing companies are to let someone go over money.
I’ll use a real life example with someone I knew. This person joined a company at the entry-level developer and worked up to a senior level. His pay rises were around 3% per year with around a 5–7% promotion raise (there were two of these).
At this point, 4–5 years after joining, he was making far under what a senior developer salary was in his area. Eventually, he interviewed on the team of a friend at another company and was offered a 40% increase. Four-Zero. CRAZY.
What the company did is baffling to me.
His boss said they may be willing to increase 5%, but there was no way they could even match what the other company offered, let alone beat it. The benefits were better at the new company, but he would’ve stayed with the original for a salary match.
So he left…
But what did the original company do? Hired a new senior level developer for the same dollar amount the dev was offered at the new one, then lost about 6 months ramping up that developer due to a super complex code base, and the new developer turned out to be much less capable than the one they just let go.
So wtf? It’s flat out stupid on the company’s part. Some sort of effed up pride or something.
They’d rather let someone walk out the door, knowing it’ll cost just as much to replace them, plus losing literally tens of thousands of dollars on ramp up time, and they gamble on getting a capable developer instead of a known, proven, loyal developer.
Thankfully, the younger tech companies understand this, and many pay people appropriate to level and talent, regardless of what they were making before they advanced to that level.11 -
A billion dollar company just sent me a nice email template.
Probably the dev missed a tutorial.
DEV 101
NEVER USE PRODUCTION DATA FOR DEVELOPMENT
2 -
!rant source: LinkedIn;
Yesterday I met with a potential client who wanted a website. I gave him a quote of X. He said, do this work for X/2 as I have lots of projects and I can keep you engaged for months.
If it was 2 years ago, I'd have happily accepted his proposal. But in the past 2 years I have learned this lesson hard way. Don't work for clients who don't pay well, because when a developer is not paid enough, the quality of work degrades. Hence the portfolio is degraded and so the future projects are also of low budget.
And before you know it, you will be surrounded by low paying clients who see you as a Skilled Labour.
Today, I don't negotiate, not even a single dollar. To justify my cost I make sure that no stones are left unturned while delivery.
It's better to work for 10 hours a week for 40$/hr then to work 40 hours a week for 10$/hr.3 -
Uncle- What do you do?
Me- I'm a software engineer
Uncle- My brother's friend's son is also a software engineer.
Me- (so what am I supposed to do about it?) yes that's nice
Uncle- I have a great idea, u should implement, I'm just telling you, it is a revolutionary idea
Me- (oh fuck, not again) yes tell
Uncle- you should make a matrimonial site which tracks what people do on internet and tell their to-be-spouses about it
Me - (yeah, I'll get sued for breach of privacy, and it has got nothing to do with my current line of work, and will probably cause divorces before marriage) yes great idea uncle
Uncle- see I told you this billion dollar idea, u should do hard work and make it
Just WHY in god's name do all uncles think laptop is a magic box in which I just have to type their idea in and it will spit out a website/software in 2 minutes. I don't go around advising them about their line of work.11 -
It's not that I hate PHP, I just hate the lack of consistency in standard function naming and parameter order, nonsensical attribute access, nearly-meaningless comparison operators, reference handling, case (in)sensitivities, and more!
I mean, look at these functions:
strtoupper(...)
bin2hex(...)
strtolower(...)
And look at THESE FUNCTIONS:
array_search($needle, $haystack)
strpos($haystack, $needle)
array_filter($array, $callable)
array_map($callback, $array)
array_walk($array, $callable)
And let me jUST USE SOME ATTRIBUTES:
$object->attr = "No dollar sign...";
Class::$attr = "GOD WHY";
HOW ABOUT SOME COMPARISONS:
(NULL == 0) // true
(NULL < -1) // ALSO true
Functions AREN'T CASE SENSITIVE (at least variables are).
Wanna dereference? TOO BAD, YOU'LL HAVE TO GET OUT THE TNT.
Alright, yeah, I hate PHP.18 -
Idea Guy repellent:
Next time they tell you that they have a billion dollar idea and want you to build it, don't get angry.
Just point them to a code learning website and tell them if their idea is truly worth a billion dollar then they should spend the time learning the tech.
Then laugh as other idea guys come to them with ideas about their billion dollar apps while the rest of us are finally left alone.9 -
Take my dollar. Take. My. Dollar.
TAKE MY DOLLAR. I WANT A DR PEPPER. THIS IS A GOOD DOLLAR. ACCEPT IT. YOU ARE MY MECHANICAL BITCH. I WISH TO EXCHANGE MONEY FOR GOODS. I WILL LITERAL-
Oh, okay. You took it. That's what I thought.4 -
Me reviewing some high school level exams after an Excel course.
"hmmm the next question is 'what does the symbol $ mean when found inside a FORMULA in Excel' ... Let's see what they answered..."
* "it's the symbol for DOLLARS" <-- well, he tried
* "I don't know" <-- mmh ok, he doesn't know
* "it can be either a plus or a minus" <-- mmmh maybe the interpreter will just figure out the correct one
* "it's used to keep an index fixed when you copy/drag the formula" <-- nice, someone who actually followed the lesson or at least knows how to google things when the teacher doesn't see
* "it's the symbol for POUNDS" <-- WTF!! Wait a moment: POUNDS???? Have you ever lived a single moment in this world? -
A Geologist and a developer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the developer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Developer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Developer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Developer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Developer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the developer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The developer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the developer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the developer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.3 -
If I had a dollar for everytime I cussed at the computer screen because my code wouldn't work I'd be rich
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Right hand working on that "billion dollar" website idea of mine; Left hand holding our 4month baby who won't sleep when put down!!!!6
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tldr:
everyone got the same hardware because senior dev liked it
So my project team was allowed to buy some hardware (monitors/keyboards/mouses etc.) so teamleader asked what we want.
senior dev: i need 1 monitor because i like to work with 1 monitor. i prefer this 27' zoll 4k monitor for around 1k dollars. since i work with multiple pc's i like this bluetooth keyboard and mouse because u can pair them with them and switch witch a click between the pc's costs around 300 dollar (1 setup of this costs 1'300 dollars)
me: so i like to use 2 monitors because i tried out multiple setups and this works for me the best (also what i have at home). but they dont need to be fancy. 2x 24' zoll montitors for each 200 dollar are enaugh (together 400 doller)
i also only work with 1 laptop and would like to have just a simple keyboard and mouse with cable because everytime they dont respons or battry runs out im fk triggered. so for me its okey if its this 30 dollar keyboard and 20 dollar mouse. it would be cool if i could get this mechanical keyboard for 80 dollars but not really needed. i only prefer mechanical keyboards a little bit more. and also i would like this mousepad i really like. it makes the mouse super responsive it's also just 10 dollars (this setup cost 510)
so at the end the teamleader was like. ah u know what senior dev has more xp and knows whats better for coding so we only buy this for every dev. but that 10 dollar mouse pad is okey u can get this extra its not that expensive.
WTF why u dont give me the cheaper setup which i more like. and why u even ask.4 -
"we don't plan on fixing a huge security hole that allows for root on our one server that runs our million-dollar service"
3 -
Just got pitched another one of those “billion dollar” app ideas at work....
An app that stores app ideas
You don’t need an app for that, you can write your app ideas on a napkin and store them in the trash where they belong.2 -
Every single time a friend comes to you with a "million dollar app idea" because he knows you're in webdev
6 -
i am BEYOND pissed at google.
as some of you know, i recently got android studio to run on a chromebook (you read that right), but it being a chromebook and google being a protective fucktard of their crappy operating system, i had to boot into bios every time i started it.
when i was with some friends, i started up the chromebook, and left, after telling my friends how to boot the chromebook.
ten seconds and literally one press of the esc button later, he broke the entire thing.
but that's not what that rant was about, i honestly knew it would happen eventually (although, this wasn't the best time).
so now this screen pops up.
"chrome os is damaged or missing, please insert a usb recovery drive" or something like that.
well, i'll create one. simple enough.
no wait, this is google, just your average 750 billion dollar company who cares more about responsive design then a product actually responding.
i started to create the recovery usb. of course, chrome developers thought it would be a good idea to convert the old, working fine, windows executable usb recoverer, and replace with with a fucking chrome extension.
i truly hope someone got fired.
so, after doing everything fine with the instructions, it got to the part where it wrote the os image to the usb. the writing stayed at 0%.
now this was a disk thing, writing os's and shit, so i didn't want to fuck it up. after waiting ten minutes, i pressed 'cancel.'
i tried again many times, looked things up, and frantically googled the error. i even tried the same search queries on bing, yahoo, duckduckgo and ecosia because i had the feeling google secretly had tracked me over the past 7 years and decided to not help me after all the times i said google was a fucker or something similar.
google is a fucker.
after that, i decided to fuck with it, even if it formats my fucking c drive.
i got to the same point where the writing got stuck at 0% and proceeded to fuck. i start spamming random keys, and guess what?
after i press enter, it started.
what the fuck google?
1000s of people read the article on how to make the recovery drive. why not tell them to press the goddamn enter key?
i swear there are hundreds of other people in my same situation. and all they have to do is press one fucking key???
maybe tell those people who tried to fix the shit product you sold them.
fuck you google.7 -
Worst meeting. Hmm..
Embarrassment wise maybe the one where my boss called me the queen of porn in front of everyone. Yes, classy AF. (Just have to know him to know his sense of humor I guess).
Most cringe worthy meeting was probably when our out of state national director came in and basically told us he has no clue what we do nor does her care to learn. We brought up salaries to him as well as we're in the bottom 8th percentile for the industry in our area with HUMONGOUS work loads, like 20 sites per developer at once. This is a huge multi-million dollar corporation, mind you. We told him some of us have to have 3 jobs to survive and he basically said well you're an at will employee so there's the door. He also took phone calls and sent emails during my one on one meeting which we never finished even though he promised to. But he bought us a shirt, so you know, it's all cool. 🙄10 -
post != rant;
post = "Feature Request";
@dfox
Stack Overflow is full of abuntch of downvoteing dickbuts. The devrant community is so much more accepting of new devs, why not add a question section.
Down votes would only be allowed for spammers.
One the question was solved, it would go into the devrant question archive, Searchable by everyone.
Ik you have heard this one before, but it's Just my two cents.9 -
Just found old logs I had with an ex-client, pre-devrant:
"What if we add the newsletter checkbox to the login, so each time a user logs in, he has to uncheck it, or else he will be subscribed to our newsletter?"
Not sure if that even needs a comment, I am speechless that was an actual suggestion, ever.1 -
So you think it's bad when your friends, family, strangers and others ask you to fix their phone or computer is bad when they hear you're a programmer, IT or good with computers?
You think it's bad when they ask you whether you're hacking when they see code or terminal on your screen?
You think it's bad when they ask you to fix a cracked phone screen because you work with computers?
Well, think again because today my teammate was asked to fix a vending machine by X from another department because, according to X the vending was not accepting X's other dollar bill. The first dollar bill was accepted so why wouldn't it accept the 2nd one? Because the 🤬 dollar bill is crumpled. That's it.
What wows me is what made X think this is an IT issue.
According to X.... "because it has power, lights and touch screen so IT can fix it That's what you guys do, right? You can fix anything".
Me: wait!?, what?, uhhh..., are you serious? Wtf? Why? Grrrr4 -
I used to think Electron apps were gonna do great and make it more accessible for companies to produce high quality programs with ease.
Oh boy I was wrong. All it did is enable big companies with the ability to refactor all of their software to run 5 times slower, consume 10 times more memory and kill your battery 20 times faster.
I fucking hate all of this prototype fast optimize later bullshit. Can I get some value for my dollar? How come technology is just being degraded for the same of "ease of programming".
You save programming time but sacrifice end user time, cus our time just doesn't fucking matter.10 -
Multi-billion dollar company - don't write fucking changelogs
At least write "Fixed some fucking bugs" or something...
Is it that hard?
11 -
Fuck ISP. Just moved to nz. Explain to this company im working at home on the internet. Need it fast.
Takes 8 days to get the 📦 in a country of 5 million people. Wtf.
Box does not contain all default connections for box to work in a default house hold.
Call them. Tells me i have to go get it myself because i didnt request it. Fuck you or did you just fuck me.
Pay 100 dollars (this is in new zealand even though it feels like afghanistan. Not trying to offenecse any on here btw) a month for unlimited internet and phoneline.
They forget to put on the phone line.
Pay their fucking stupid 4 dollar cable insurance because new zealand has houses built for fucking cave people with 0 insolation and prone to dampness.
First day connections dont work. Well is that not fucking beautiful. I actually payed 4 worthy dollars.
WRONG YOU MOTHER FUCKER.
They tell me i didnt take the insurance.i go mayhem tell them how useless they are. So they send some one 8am the next mornin while activating the insurance. Ho yeah they also told me they forgot to include landline in my account.
Now 2 days in everything works im happy. Wake up to “your account has been suspended because you went over the max 200$ of your credit. You owe us 250$ before you can re-activate your account....
Inside boiling. Rudness and caps just won`t help.... I need some blood.... Some ISP blood....12 -
Started watching silicon Valley. HELL, THE BEST TECH SERIES EVER.don't know why i always end up watching long multi-season series in my exam days xD
Anyways what would you guys choose for your million dollar idea: sell it at $10 million, or build a company out of it? I will definitely sell.
14 -
There's a developer hired solely to write an application to replace millions of dollar third-party subscription somewhere in the universe.
9 -
You are seeing this ad because Facebook sold your data in order to become billion dollar company.
Haha.
28 -
made my first dollar(actually $4) on internet.
got a gig on fiverr.
client wanted his joomla website to be unresponsive so website looks same on all devices.
never touched joomla.
it took ne 2.5 hours but actual work was only 10-15 minutes.
yippiiiieee.....😀😀😇😇10 -
Saw some cheapie little radio in the dollar store, bought 2 of them for reverse engineering. Powered it from my lab bench power supply as usual, and tested whether it actually works before doing anything else.. then I noticed that the tunes were actually quite catchy, so I just ended up listening.
Then I started to notice that the audio wire I was using (the one I've spent a couple of days building earlier) had intermittent audio issues where the right driver would drop out when the wire was held in certain positions. Oscilloscope probing showed that there was some sort of disconnect, with only the 50Hz noise from the power lines showing up. Opened up the connector and noticed that the ground wire had detached. An 28AWG electrical wire that was inside a jack that was meant for stress relief! Yet the copper strands must've detached one by one regardless. What do I need then, huh?! 18AWG which wouldn't even fit on the connector, only to see the strands in that eventually detach as well?! You know what, let's go fancy.. 1AWG which is meant for extremely high current applications!!
At that point I was literally shouting "FUCK!!! Why does this shit always happen to me?!! ONE FUCKING PROJECT THAT FINISHED SUCCESSFULLY, YET STILL BROKE?!!!! WHY!!!!!!"
Clearly I need some fresh air to cool down. On my way to the fast food restaurant to get some Bicky burgers. More shit, humans. One stupid driver who slowed down on me, which of all things I hate the most. GO FASTER ALREADY YOU SLOWFUCK, AND GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT!!! Next a pedestrian with a dog.. I swear motherfucker, if that dog comes anywhere near me I'll personally turn it into fucking fricassee.
Ah and then comes the killer.. in this stupid fucking summer, all that's needed to fix any issue is a fucking stupid DESPACITO, right?! More like DeSPASTICo!! FUCK!!!!
.. Back home, rather tired. So essentially a wire that was specifically built to have high endurance broke on me. Back to Bluetooth I guess.2 -
Anytime I have to deploy to iOS store. Part of the stack includes human review... Need I say more?
If I had a dollar for every fucking time they ignored our flagging to not put it on iPad, and returned with their review 2-3 days later saying:
"App UI did not run on iPad resolution cleanly."
Then having to submit an appeal and wait 2-3 more days...10 -
When you're a multimillion dollar company that ships software used by oil and gas and you still haven't moved away from VB6 for extensions while in the 21st century... Well, you're certainly missing out on the accelerating telegram industry.
-
10 years experience in DoD C4I enterprise hardware and software.
Looks at civilian job (requires A+)
Gets A+
Looks at civilian job (requires Network+)
Gets Network+
Looks at civilian job market (requires Security+)
Gets security+
Looks at civilian job market (requires CCNA)
Getting CCNA
Looks again at job market (requires CCNP)
Fuck...
Job interview "we don't think you have a strong enough background"
Looks back at my 5 million dollar military flying robotic server FML4 -
Windows 10 'App Store' Stole My Money.
So I work a 40 hour work week, sometimes more, same as anyone, on my feet, all day.
I get home, buy a little $3.99 app. Won't install. Check it again won't install. I check some guides. Follow all the standard commands, my purchase won't install. Use the tools. won't install.
Naturally I sent off what I'm good at, some hate filled invective
For fucks sake. I'm exhausted, have insomnia and want to wind down. And here microsoft is killing 32bit libraries to dispose of competing services like steam (also fuck gabe in his fat asshole) but I digress.
And they expect us to use their services? Spend our hard earned *fucking money*..and spend half an hour on their dumpster fire fucking 'walled garden' with nothing to fucking show for it?
No refund button. No chat option. Just a fucking feedback hub. Look at it some time. JUST LOOK AT IT. The motherfucking *feedback* hub *frozeup* in the process of my feedback. Microsoft is a sewer of negligent business practices and incompetence.
So I've chosen now to aim two heavy ion cannons at them and warned them too. Two twitter accounts, one with almost 10k followers and another with 15k.
Should have just offered a manual download button microsoft.
My money would have been better spent on alcohol. Cheap alcohol. It's not like it's a lot of money and I don't buy a lot online, but it's the principle. You're fucking *payment* process worked *just fucking fine*.
Anyway can anyone calculate the monetary damage a cumulative quarter million views over the course of a month will do to the reputation of the windows store in dollar amounts?
I'm betting it's going to be a lot fucking more than three fucking ninety nine.
Don't worry microsoft, I'm gonna take it out of your sweet fucking hide.22 -
I recently ranted so much about languages but here it goes
JS we need to talk. BECAUSE YOU GOT FAT AND UGLY STUPID BITCH! Dumb piece of bloatware. What even is your problem? Depending on a library for strpad and then blow up like Steve jobs ego. Bastardized fuckfest. I used to like you bro and then you screw me over!
It's like you fuck my wife while I try to fix your car. Why can't you even be usefully on your own anymore? I'd be richer than bill gates if I get a dollar for every damn framework people pull from their asses. Are you writing this fuck while shitting so you can compare colors of your outcome?
Normalize the fucking base, don't add to the bukkakke! bitch is drowning already. Why is everyone jerking of to react and angular? When have YOU written something in vanilla the last time? Why even bother? Remove the core and hardcore every damn framework into the browsers. Guess that saves you 200kb. Oh wait I forgot that's about unminified jQuery.
Now I need to load about 2GB of dependencies, some creating code that puts code in my code to load code out of my code which was generated out of something that remotely resembles JS so every browser is able to execute my fancy shit. But hey, it's fast. And of course there are the fanboys. You are worse than apple fags. You sample your own jizz with your friends in a wine glass. there was a Time it was bad practice to mix logic and view. Now you made it mandatory. "Browser does the rendering" ofc you imbecile pile of fuck don't show me a damn preloader for 1 picture and 20 lines of text. Who fucked your brain so hard?
So react seems to be the cool kid now, then I tell someone I know angular it's like showing up in a pikachu onsie to a formal dinner with the queen.
I used to love you girl. I loved how we could dirty things together. Now you are like a pig. Please loose weight bby the sight of you disgusts me nowadays2 -
LinkedIn is probably the closest thing we have to a parallel universe,
where all HRs hand out more salary to candidates than they asked for,
where 100% of people struggle in the beginning get their big break and turn their business into a multi-billion dollar company,
where there is no such thing as office politics, every employee is always happy to be a part of the organization.
where each team identifies themselves as a "family".
#ugh15 -
Android Studio Installation.
What is the fucking point of giving an option to install the software somewhere other than C drive when the installation fails if done so.
Fucking cunts, multi billion dollar company my ass. Go to hell you stupid fucks.15 -
A mate from highschool contacted me the other day, offering me a job on this grand new idea he had.
So I said: "Allright, lets hear it, whats the idea?"
Him: "Trust me, its the next billion dollar app! It is a whole new social network for..."2 -
Today a client requested me create a full portal for him (including a CMS, a Blog , a News Aggregator + LOGO & Android App )
guess how much he was ready pay for it ?
3,000,000 (iran Rial) in US dollar equlas to lower than 100$ :|
why they think we are doing magic ?6 -
If you had a dollar for every time someone has told me "I have an app idea" , you would have enough money to hire me to build your app.3
-
Who says all bugs are bad? Vending machine at work only charges you a dollar regardless what drink you buy if you use android pay.1
-
My annoying 19-yo nephew wants to drop out of CompSci to "create the next billion-dollar startup".
I told him I would give him 10 rupees (USD 0.10) for 0.000000001% percent of his "pass me the butter at the diner table" company.
He accepted. Thus, his "heritage protein logistics startup" had an series-A valuation of a billion American dollars!
Hopefully he will stay in college now.2 -
Yeah sure, the Metaverse will be bigger than the Internet.
I really believe that. Short of a system collapse, there's nothing which will stop some Web/VR/AR amalgam from eventually going mainstream. If anything, a prolonged pandemic will make humans hunger for more digital entertainment and socializing options.
Might take 5 years, or 25, but it will happen in some form. Eventually, people will even readily accept various augmentations to their bodies to further immerse themselves and connect to digital experiences.
BUT:
We're still pre-bubble.
Does no one remember the dotcom crash?
Facebook/Meta will become the new Yahoo, decimated to a sliver of its former glory. Million dollar hype NFTs will become the new $10 parked domain names. 99.99% of all current efforts and content will end up like a modern day Geocities Archive.
So yeah... when I read that my pension fund is considering "investing in metaverse technologies"...
...you fucking bet it's time to transfer to a different fund!22 -
/* rant */
I freaking hate it when people call me to fix their 9 gazillion dollar ultra extreme enthusiast alien technology pc just so they can play a a god damn freaking son of a damn bloody bitchy fb game on 9000 fps in 4k while some people struggle to have 6 tabs open at the same time so they can code+compile+preview+consult the interwebs. And lets just not mention the amount of monitors mmkay?5 -
The time the manager blew wind in a million dollar + client meeting. The meeting ended quick soon after that as the smell lingered in the room for hours. The client went else where we lost our jobs.3
-
Reasons 1 and 2 arent that important to me. The main reason I code is #3.
1) Brain exercise. I always feel sharp after a coding session, even if it ended in disaster.
2) Lots to do! There's never a full day in code. Make your own universe, if you so desire.
3) Pride. I have a pride problem. I never felt proud of myself no matter what I do. I graduated with a melancholy feeling, same deal when getting my license, same deal when passing a test (God, glad that's over!)... But code makes me proud. I love what I make. I want to show everyone. I want to show it to everyone before it's even finished because I just can't wait. I want everyone to use it and to love it. Because I sure do, and it's the best thing ever.
I could make a viral video, produce a triple platinum record, or build a billion dollar business and still not feel the same level of genuine satisfaction and happiness that I may get from writing good code.
It always keeps me coming back. -
New feature on the Cuntbook. Want to write a post to a page? Poof, and it's gone! BILLION DOLLAR FUCKING FEATURE!!! BILLION DOLLAR FUCKING COMPANY!!!
CERTIFIED MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!
Oh and just to load our pages it takes 20 seconds. Because fuck you, this is Web 2.0. FUCK!!!
9 -
Wow, after 4 years of working with PHP, and now working with NodeJS and ASP Core, I gotta admit that PHP is pure shit.
It's really awesome to see the documentation provided for NodeJs and ASPCore.
75% of PHP documentation isunreadable crap. Every fucking variable starts with a fucking dollar sign, wtf! How unpleasant is to read that. And holy mother of god, why concatenate with a dot ? We all know "+" means "add, aggregate, etc". PHP is unreadable as fuck. Fuck laravel, fuck Yii, fuck Composer.
Seriously guy, move to NodeJs or AspCore. Both of them are pretty good.16 -
I forgot my password to [SITE]. Of course, I click "forgot password", and enter my email, which I did remember. Fairly routine "ah shit we have a problem" steps.
Now, it takes a second. This is to be expected. So I'm not worried. I then get the email and...
Now, you will notice that I redacted some information, like the company name, email, and my PLAIN TEXT PASSWORD, and my name.
I would like to note that this isn't a small, very local company that's new (even then it'd be unacceptable), but this is a multinational, multimillion dollar company.
How'd someone fuck up THIS badly?
13 -
A couple of months, 0$
It was a school project where I had to make a website for a company. I asked for a small amount of money for the website(100 euro). They accepted my offer but when it was time to sell the website, the company was sold to someone else. Unfortunately, they didn't want to pay for the website. They didn't even bother looking at the website(They are probably using Wix right now though).
Sorry if my English is crap :)2 -
I bless everyone with happiness worth billions of dollars and additional billion dollar in cash.
Live happy everyone. I hope all your good dreams come true.23 -
I'm starting to think we might need a global union for developers. I have been reading the comments today and it looks like a lot us getting way underpaid.
New features should be a moment of joy if they are released. So far so good. People really liked the idea of working together on opensource project. The app is updated. But then we encountered a major problem. It looks like some of us are getting so underpaid that they can't pay for the 14 dollar it cost to start the opensource project they want. We must rebel against this.
14 dollar, how much is 14 dollar. How many hobbies cost 14 dollar to start up. From running to collecting stamps. Its going to cost you more And how many hobbies are you as passionate about as your own open source project.
The next great thing is that it is show in the place where developers are eagerly looking to join a opensource project. And will probably join you're product because I'm sure between all of us there are tons of wonderfull ideas just waiting to be build.
And for me personal I do not mind supporting an app that I use almost every day. And just keeps growing without annoying ads.
So you should be more then willing to pay 14 dollars. And are ready to start recruiting your team.
And if you really can't pay. Your house burned down, you needed it for food. Your only pc is beyond saving. You can be a positive force in this community and do pay with upvotes.
But if you are to much a cheapskate to pay 14 dollars well, I think I was clear enough.5 -
Photoshop in my country with a low dollar exchange rate, literally required 1/10th of my monthly salary when I was a beginner.
Literally go fuck yourself Adobe.4 -
(the meeting)
I've had a non-IT world colleague ask me to build a website, I asked if it's a static website like resume etc with no database & stuff. I quoted $1000 if that's the case since that's minimal maintenance
He goes he needs a simple website, like eBay to sell his products. Also need features like Amazon, integration of various payments. And this and that.
For $1000 !!
I felt good that he thinks I can make an e-commerce site but f¢k that thinking man.. I told him to hire a freelancer and told him about few sites.
Maybe we'll see a thousand dollar e-commerce site, haha I only hope the payments part is secure 😂😂 I ain't buying anything anyways. I'm 99 % sure nobody's gonna do it and next time we talk, he's gonna be like 1000 and a 50 haha3 -
>be my team
>developing a mobile app
>I'm responsible for developing a "RESTful" API to interface communications between the app and the database
>there's also an "admin" web application which the client themselves will use to manage some shit in the database
>I've developed the API, it works with the mobile app
>instead of just making it simply a front-end app that makes requests to the API like the mobile app does, the guy responsible for the admin app completely ignores my API and implements his own with a certain messy dollar symbol language and a certain bloated piece of server software, accessing the same database directly, and does some operations in his own special way that will break what I've implemented
>now data inserted via admin app is inaccessible to the server API, and I'm expected to "fix" my code so it's consistent with this guy's shit, but the only way to do it is introducing interdependency between the actual API and the admin app's back end
Fuck my life, now I'm the one responsible for the app being broken because no way the guy who's used to kludging unmaintainable shit together fast would ever fuck anything up2 -
My worst Technology I've worked with is deffinatly the Facebook Graph API.
THIS AIDS INVESTED PIECE OF CUNTFLAPS IS FULL OF BUGS THAT THEY REFUSE TO SOLVE.
How such a multi-billion dollar business can produce such a retardedly incestious sucky fuck dick ass cunt broken API is beyond me.
FUCK!!!5 -
You wanna know what the fuck we did in our goddamn code.org class today, wait no, the last whole fucking week. YES OR NO QUESTIONS. I GET BINARY IS FUCKING 0'S AND 1'S. FOR GOD SAKES I KNOW BINARY. I EVEN KNOW FUCKING TERNARY. AND. YOU KNOW WHAT TEACHER ? EVERYONE ELSE COULD LEARN BINARY IN FIVE GODDAMN MINUTES. "Is code.org worthy of being kicked in the ass and tied up on a railroad when the trains coming?" Is a perfect binary question. This whole fucking class I feel like I'm in an english class for five year olds in spain. HEY TEACHER I DON'T CARE IF BILL GATES OR MARK SUCKERBURG OR BARAK OBAMA OR GODDAMN CHRIS BOSH SUPPORTS IT. ITS FOR THERE FUCKING REPUTATION. PEOPLE WITH HALF A BRAIN KNOW THESE PEOPLE DON'T GIVE A FUCK. THEY EACH HAVE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OR EVEN BILLIONS OF DOLLARS, BUT THEY ALL CHOSE TO USE A FIVE DOLLAR MIC JUST TO FUCK WITH US. EVERY TIME I WALK IN THAT CLASS I FEEL DEGRADED LIKE I'VE BEEN PUT BACK IN PRESCHOOL. THANK YOU TEACHER, I ALWAYS WANTED TO LEARN BINARY TO MAKE MY FUCKING SIMPLE JAVASCRIPT APP AS MY FINAL PROJECT FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR.4
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Have a couple I want to air today.
First was at my first gig as a dev, 4-5 months out of school. I was the only dev at a startup where the owner was a computer illiterate psycopath with serious temper tantrums. We're talking slamming doors, shouting at you while you are on the phone with customers, the works...
Anyways, what happened was that we needed to do an update in our database to correct some data on a few order lines regarding a specific product. Guess who forgot the fucking where-clause... Did I mention this boss was a cheap ass, dollar stupid, penny wise asshole that refused to have anything but the cheapest hosting? No backups, no test/dev/staging environment, no local copies... Yeah, live devving in prod, fucking all customers with a missing semi-colon (or where clause).
Amazingly, his sheer incompetance saved my ass, because even if I explained it, he didn't get it, and just wanted it fixed as best we could.
The second time was at a different company where we were delivering managed network services for a few municipalities. I was working netops at that time, mostly Cisco branded stuff, from Voice-over-IP and wifi to switches and some routing.
One day I was rolling out a new wireless network, and had to add the VLAN to the core switch on the correct port. VLAN's, for those who don't know, are virtual networks you can use to run several separated networks on the same cable.
To add a VLAN on a Cisco switch one uses the command:
switchport access vlan add XYZ
My mistake was omitting the 'add', which Cisco switches happily accept without warning. That command however can be quite disruptive as it replaces all of the excisting VLAN's with the new one.
Not a big deal on a distribution switch supplying an office floor or something, but on a fucking core switch in the datacenter this meant 20K user had no internet, no access to the applications in the DS, no access to Active Directory etc. Oh and my remote access to that switch also went down the drain...
Luckily a colleague of mine was on site with a console cable and access to config backups. Shit was over within 15 minutes. My boss at that time was thankfully a pragmatic guy who just responded "Well, at least you won't make that mistake again" when we debriefed him after the dust settled. -
The dreamer : doer ratio
"I have a million dollar idea"
"That's cool!"
"I just need someone to do the work and I'll be rich!"
DO THE WORK YOURSELF!!!4 -
>work on multi million dollar company
>last year "we were doing fine" until we got told "well, turns out we didn't, no bonus this year"
>people leave
>You'll get a bonus next year for sure
>Company cuts expenses such as training budgets and freezes raises and promotions
>People still leave
>There are whole teams that are now left with 1-3 people, lol
>Turns out we will not get any bonuses this year either, except for "the high achievers", but they have not announced it yet
>high achievers include the evp of engineering who single handedly destroyed the company's DevOps department last year and an EM/engineer who is completely incompetent as both an engineer as well as a manager, so much so that the company has made him his own 1-person-department so that he doesn't have to work with other people
>Upper management keeps telling us everything is going fine and they suck each other's d**k
This is like watching a trainwreck in slow motion lmao.
I'll stay till they announce this year's bonuses to watch the shit show and then I'll leave17 -
A dollar or a peso is a certain amount of work stored in a piece of paper. You need to work to get them or have other people work for you. When governments print new money and push it into circulation they reduce what you were compensated with for the work you did. Essentially they are taking your wealth (spending power) away without you even realizing. It is a modestly sophisticated form of theft. When public companies issue new shares onto the market they are doing same thing by reducing the percentage of the company you own. This is why you will see non-inflationary assets such as Bitcoin, land, gold bars and gold ETFs, etc. continue to rise in value and certainly outpace inflation. It’s because people who are smart with money are fearful of holding cash and they are looking for a safe place to store it. If you are not afraid of holding substantial amounts of cash, then I suppose you don’t really understand what it is. There is a reason why they don’t teach teenagers about inflation in any country of the world. As long as the masses are focused on earning and saving fiat, governments have so much more power and control. If you remove all of the fiat from circulation, then we will revert to a barter/trading system which would substantially reduce government power, at that point they would only maintain control using physical force, which is a lot more challenging to carry out. #btc #gold #rant #av41
-
bro just learn C bro I promise it's all smooth sailing bro haha lol just take up HTML with CSS bro its a piece of cake bro what bro lol just start coding up differential equations with numpy library haha its so simple bro just start with Ruby bro it will take only couple days bro what lol bro take this aeronautical course on how to code an airplane simulation bro its so simple bro just start algorithms on cryptography bro its so easy i cant bro just start writing drivers for printers bro haha lol just start writing a bootloader for a new Linux distro bro lol haha easy bro just make a billion dollar company bro haha its so simple.
keep going bro haha invent your own JS framework over a billion existing ones haha bro typescript is so easy bro lol what u say take up redis bro go from the first command bro learn mongodb and mysql together bro its so simple.
but bro don't try to master JS bro .. u will regret it forever bro.6 -
If I'd have a dollar each time someone said to me: "ohhhhh you are programmer? So you could get me the Facebook password of someone?", I would have retired 5 years ago.4
-
Ok so to recap, we had shit beginning. We couldn't find client like 3 months and thank god that we agreed that we don't register the firm right away. If we did we would be broke a long time ago.
We found first client and he wanted to build some scrapers with gui. So me being BackEnd developer I created API for scraping (boredom) and my friend created website for that api and I just created gui that displays that site. The project was about 1200$. And since there are 3 of us we splited it into 3x400$.
After that it was again really hard to find clients again. We thought of quitting and just going to uni or something but we really didn't want to and anyways we needed to get money for uni ourselfs if we wanted to go.
So we said that as we are not paying anything and not losing money we will continue as long as we can.
And after we managed to get a hold of it and now we have 2 clients and after we finish them we have 2 more.
So I think the most important thing is that you help your coworkers. My friend who finds clients had a rough time at the beggining as I mentioned. So all 3 of us got together and started spamming people for few weeks. That's how we found our first client.
So now we are running. Not a milion dollar company but we are happy that we are doing what we love and that we have money doing it. We aim higher but we don't want to hurry and screw things up as we are young still.
Also thank you for getting interested after 300 days :)11 -
I don't think it's to complicated...
Dumb clients, no matter who they are if they want you to fix their computer ... Create a new Twitter , hack, when you don't hack.
They make our lives hell .. why ? Because ignorance.
My favourite is when they expect you to work for nothing.oh but you can have 2% it's a billion dollar idea you'll make like 20 mill!😒🙄 All I'll do is sit here since i was the genius if the idea you work out the details ? 400 hours you say? I'm sure it'll take 20 don't be silly now.1 -
If I had a dollar for every time my work PC froze today, I'd have already died from alcohol poisoning.
-
A bit different than wk93, but still connected and a fun story.
Back in high school when it began to digitalize everything, so began our teachers journey with technology. We, as IT class were into these things, but as far as I can say, others in the school including both teachers and students were like cave mans when it came to IT.
Most of them kept the different wifi networks password on the windows desktop, in a file 'wifipassword.txt'. When we were on robotics seminar, we had to use a teacher's laptop. The wifi network was incredibly fast and powerful,, yet so poorly configured that even the configuration page user/pass was the default admin/admin, because the IT admin wasn't the most skilled one.
We got the idea to sell the password of the wifi network to other students. Not much, for about 1 dollar a week. The customer came to us, we took the phone, took note of the MAC address, entered the password, and if the guy were to stop paying every week, we just blacklisted that MAC on the next robotics course.
Went well for months, until a new sysadmin came and immediately found it out, we were almost fired from the school, but my principal realized how awesome this idea was. You may say that we were assholes, and partially that is true, I'd rather say we made use of our knowledge.2 -
Friend: i have an idea
Me: what is it?
Friend: uber is not yet here, lets do the app exactly like uber only for the city, can you do that like in one month?
Me: uber is a billion dollar company with several and the best engineers in the world
Friend: so what, just copy the exact same idea, of course the money comes when the app is done
Me: sure... ill call you in a month. (delete conversation) -
My NDA prevents me of revealing a lot but here we go...
Hi,
during a 2 year hiatus after High School I decided to study CS. Coming from a third world country with no prospect of getting a nice job without breaking my back or getting spit on by overconfident CS geeks who now actually make a living wage there, I decided to study abroad.
I immediately realized what I have been missing... the culture, the people, the happenings,... I have been starved of LIFE
Anyways, I got the language pretty much down, uni is pretty hard but doable and I got the unthinkable... A JOB. I am currently a working student for a year at a multimillion dollar global conglomerate, doing what some may think of as scripting/data tinkering. I get payed more than both my parents combined, which is why they don't know anything... 😂 (yet, gotta ease em into it).
Now I have gotten my contract extended, which shows that I am doing a decent job there, the boss is firm but chill, coworkers are helpful and resourceful.
But what really grinds my gears is that I am mashing code together whilst googling my brain out, but I am not gaining any skill...
Now comes my grievance, the bane of my existence, the evil Morty to my Morty,... GitHub.
In this professional surrounding, where I got handed a $2,5k notebook and a overly huge paycheck, I never use Git (because we have a proprietary, internal, and very transparent alternative (transparent for the higher ups 😬 ))
I always wanted to contribute on GitHub, but I get very intimidated by the projects there and their scopes, people are waaay too knowledgeable in comparison to me and I will most certainly screw something up and embarrass myself. Since I am very self-conscious and awkward I would most probably just delete my profile there and lurk in the shadows again.
I need help, not only for my mental health, but also to expand my skillset and improve myself, since skill is the only thing I can still acquire.
Does anyone know where I should start as a overglorified python script-kiddy who still thinks 1337 is cool and mr Robot is a decent show?
Thanks,
@rn11 -
Inspiration to code kicks in!
Kids asleep, everybody’s asleep, house is quiet. The kind of peace ive always wanted and wished! (Parents here will understand.)
Get to my laptop, opened up code editor, start fresh and clean! Created new file, about to type my first code and.........blood dripping from my nose. It doesn’t stop there, its like flowing for a while!
I noticed it keeps flowing while im projecting the inner excitement to code. When my mind drifted a bit, the nose bleeding stops. Wth? Its like my body is ejaculating when im excited to code, yeah.. it ls blood shot out of my nose, wtf!
...and i have to stop what im doing. Then the ideas just spoofly gone. Suddenly i dont know why im staring at an empty code editor.. (what was im about to code again?) i totally cant recall, it simply gone. Damn it. That could be a million dollar apps! Wish i can go back to an hour ago and record myself when i received that historic inspirational moment. 😔9 -
For fucks sake, Amazon Prime has also decided that they are adding ads to their *paid subscription*. Because I guess paying them fucking monthly is not enough for them greedy fucks. It's not like they were loosing money either, the service had a slow but exponential growth ever since 2014 (slow in the sense that it was only hundreds of millions at first, but luckily it was tens of billions by 2022, poor amazon eh?) ... first fucking Netflix does this, and now these retarded fucks follow suit like little retarded ducklings with dollar signs for eyes. You can bet your fucking hats that the other services will jump on the adWagon soon too...
"you will own nothing and be happy".. yeah fuck you, you fucks. As if owning nothing wasn't bad enough, now that nothing comes with fucking ads on top FOR THE SAME FUCKING PRICE?!... And they have the audacity to fucking ask for *more* monthly money to get rid of the ads they oh so graciously provided?!
I don't even use fucking amazon prime, but what the actual fuck. This is *one* of the reasons I canceled my netflix sub. I'm not going to fucking support this behavior even if it doesn't affect me. But I guess some people keep showing netflix dicks into their gaping asses because they sure don't seem to be taking this bullshit back... And I assume even more people will keep sucking amazon dicks as if this was a-ok behavior.
god, shit like this really makes me angry...3 -
There are always guys coming with the same million dollar app idea every few weeks that want me to develop the app for share of the future revenues.
Btw the idea is always like this: "he man, i got an app idea which will make us rich quick. It's like Facebook and Instagram mix but with tinder functionality."
7 -
If i had a dollar for each time I promised myself to actually work, I wouldn't have to work for the rest of my life...3
-
Do you think refactoring code adds value?
Pick one:
1. Hard No (Only refactor when there is a dollar value associated with it, i.e new feature depends on it).
2. Somewhat Yes (Futureproof your code, anticipate easiness to build feature requested in future).
3. Yes (Developer happiness, retention and for point 2)27 -
My younger brother is a speedcuber and I got this for my birthday.
The albino cube.
Useless, like myself.
Beautiful, like myself.
And btw it’s no shabby dollar-store piece of crap, it’s a real magnetic competition-grade cube.
5 -
I'm tasked with hacking a million dollar production machine and all the PLCs have the same password for the root user, which also happens to be the name of the company producing this shit....5
-
Watched an action hack movie
Then designed a scenario to sniff around a bank and get the encrypted key and finally extract the key and omg!
I've broke into the bank !!!
But seriously, is it worth trying?
I'm not going to do any thing stupid like even taking a dollar , but is it just the way I thought it is?
Will anything unexpected happen?16 -
Spent 2+ months this year building two new software courses. They've netted me a total of... $17.00
That's 5 cents per hour at 40/hours a week, not bad!!!!
also please fucking tell me how a $49.99 course with 92 enrollments this month earns me a grand total of $93 (even rounding up here for generosity)
creator: $93
udemy: $4506
udemy: "instructor gets 37% of comissions"
yeah okay then where is my fucking $1000+
I mean what in the literal FUCK is going on here
better put: i average a single fucking dollar for each $50 course I sell?
Please kill me and end it all in this mindless race to the bottom
taking a deep dive on this revenue share and then i'm going to fucking get the money i deserve10 -
Baby I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight ~
I love cheap clients ~
Baby I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight ~
I love shit bugs ~1 -
2,8 trillion dollar company btw. Unannounced maintenance (not showing up on their status page either). Wanted to publish a fucking ios bugfix, now I can't do shit.
6 -
Who's the dumbass that decided you can't delete your PayPal account at all unless your balance is $0?
I am not giving you my card information for the $0.18 balance I have. For God sakes, I don't even bend over to pick that up if I see it on the ground.
It's one thing if it were like $100 or even $10. But it's eighteen fucking cents. Not even a a quarter of a fucking dollar.
At least make me put in my password and answer a security question or some shit, not straight up remove the option to delete it.
Fucking ridiculous.21 -
Google search can get fucked in the ass.
Greedy fucking bastards deceptively including ads as normal results.
It used to be just one, but I've seen crazy shit, like 4 ads in one search results. FOUR.
And it's not just the ads. It's all the fucking litter that they put above the results.
I'm talking about all this fucking Google Maps and web cards bullshit.
It takes too much goddamned space, and most of the times I DO NOT GIVE SHITS ABOUT THEM.
And if you want to hide that shit, guess what, you gotta go into the settings. How about you include a fucking corner X that I can click so I can hide immediately hide that shit when I want to?
Now, let's analyze the unholy mess that the image I included is:
The search I did is a simple "html form". Notice that the fucking Adblock is turned ON, yet I still get a "chameleon" ad.
The first real result is from w3schools that also expands on two also hideous things: sitelinks.
Sitelinks are nothing more than spacehogs that I very very rarely click. They look fancy, but they just add CLUTTER.
What are search result n 2 and 3? w3fools again. And I shit you not the next 2 results to those are also w3schools again. So 5 w3fucks links TOTAL.
Wow, google, I'm fucking mindblown, excellent fucking job for a trillion dollar corporation.
Get fucked in the ass.
12 -
"Can I have an app? It's a million dollar idea: you take a picture of yourself and it tells you if you're pregnant or just fat. I don't have any money at the moment but I'm willing to give you 5%, maybe less if my friend wants to join. plus, no ads, and make it a free app so it will be liked alot."
Can you shut the fuck up? do you have any idea what the fuck you're talking about? that's the most fucking ridiculous idea I've ever heard. how the hell would it even work?5 -
It's always the people who being nothing but "million dollar ideas" who want you to build the entire product and then have the audacity to ask for 50% profit.7
-
Today some random highschool guy who i barely knew tried to convince me to build for him his "billion dollar" social app while he handles the business side. I burnt that crap with eternal holy fire before he even finished that sentence!1
-
My first experience with any kind of development was in a web mastering class in high school. I got super into it and started going really far ahead in the course materials.
During the second semester most students in the class were not interested at all so I decided to start a business of selling custom tailored assignments to about half the class. It didn't make me rich of course, but it felt good being the HTML / CSS god in the class.
The best part honestly was getting caught. The principal was so impressed at the amount of extra work I'd been doing that he just gave me a detention. Thanks Mr. Murray, for being so cool and not putting me down for doing what I love. -
Is it ethical to charge a client for the runtime of a computation? I.e. cpu time?
I usually don't, since it doesn't cost me anything to leave my machine running overnight. But a few of my friends told me that I should.
More context:
I do sometimes freelance work for professors as an RA. At times you need to leave a script running for like +5 hours. During which I just either procrastinate or go to the gym or sleep. The energy cost for computer running is barely a dollar.
I get charged by the hour per work in my timesheet, or sometime for a negotiate price which is also usually computed by the estimated work time it would take.5 -
Let's Americanize idioms:
1. Break the ice — Open the wallet
2. Bite the bullet — Pay the price
3. Hit the nail on the head — Count the exact change
4. Let the cat out of the bag — Drop a dime
5. Piece of cake — Easy money
6. Costs an arm and a leg — Break the bank
7. Under the weather — In the red
8. The ball is in your court — The check is in your hands
9. Burn the midnight oil — Spend the last dollar
10. Hit the sack — Cash in for the night
11. Barking up the wrong tree — Investing in a bad stock
12. When pigs fly — When money grows on trees
13. Kick the bucket — Cash out
14. Spill the beans — Drop a coin
15. Break a leg — Make a fortune
16. Pull someone's leg — Shortchange someone
17. Once in a blue moon — Once in a financial windfall
18. A blessing in disguise — A hidden treasure
19. The best of both worlds — A double dividend
20. Caught between a rock and a hard place — Between a loan and a hard debt16 -
So, finally I can rant after a while.
After I stopped helping people coding online few months ago, because I was getting literally spammed 24/7 by everyones shitty multi-million dollar ideas, I introduced few of my classmates in to coding. Now, after ~6 months, I am spammed by my classmates by their awesome programming ideas which are too hard for them but they are sure its gonna be awesome. The difference is, that I cant say "FUCK OFF AND STOP SPAMMING MY INBOX WITH YOUR FUCKING IDEAS" to my friends and block them. Please fucking kill me. Once more someone will start messaging me their fucking idea
-like this
-in
-separate
-messages instead
-of writing one
-long and propper
-message
I am gonna swim with a toaster. 😡3 -
Combine multiple open source softwares.
Tweak it a bit
Voila! You've a 100 dollar software ready to be sold.8 -
Oh no...
A <FlatList> as a DIRECT child of a <ScrollView>... I mean, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt if you forgot or it was buried in a nested component... but... it's just sitting right in front of you on the same exact component... it's like, did you even test this once and see the warnings?
God these 'affordable' devs truly aren't actually worth it.
They really aren't.
You spend just as much time fixing their clownish mess as you get for "saving money" with their cheap rates.
Another day, another clown dollar in clowntown...
SHEESH3 -
This guitar looks heavily worn, yet it’s brand new. It’s called a “relic” — the guitar is artificially aged. Relics always cost crazy amount of money compared to regular guitars.
Relics were invented by Keith Richards, when he said “bash ‘em up a bit” to a guitar master builder from Fender, the guitar company.
With one phrase, Keith created a billion dollar industry.
7 -
USA: you were born American, so you must pay American taxes even if you live and do business in some other country, or else say hello to the IRS. You know, we need money to feed our trillion dollar army (that can't handle protests and prevent civil casualties)
also USA: *prints two trillions of dollars in 10 months* Here's your $1200 stimulus package10 -
!rant
I know it's not that impressive in the dev world, but I'm finally making six figures (the lowest six figure value possible but STILL) and I can't really brag to my friends about dollar amounts so HURRAH. Accepted the offer yesterday, and I'm quite pleased about it.
Annoyed that it took so long (I'm 29), but I did have a two year long career break for a family medical issue/travel/quarter life crisis, so so it goes.10 -
when life gives you lemon, buy vodka and stuff. prepare good vodka martini. then develop an app to sell it across countries.
-
so Broadcom bought VMWare.... so now whenever you go to any community support page that used to be on VMWare's community, you're just always redirected to Broadcom's support homepage...
another billion dollar company that has failed to understand the basics in HTTP and DNS
what do i expect...
i don't know, they probably only have like 2 devs, i shouldn't be so hard on them
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡3 -
!dev
Fucking money problems..
Had 20k on the side before relocating..
Old country wanted 10k taxes, 10k left..
Flight, hotel etc 2k..
8k left..
Bought a cheap car, 5.5k left..
After the rental cars, 3k left..
Bank blocks card because of potential fraud, so I can’t pay the insurance and have to take another rental car..
2.5k left.
2.4k deposit so I can’t pay the insurance for 2k..
At least 0.4k left and first salary comes in, but since I’m new, I’m on emergency tax so I only got about 1.5k.. will get the taxes back later but for February I’m so fucking broke..
At least everything is paid now so I can start to safe from 0 again...
Fuuuccckkkk..
Totally worth it though..
#lifeIsSoMuchBetterOverHere,ImNeverGoingBack..
#iDontThinkCommasInHashtagsAreAllowedButIDontGiveAFuck!9 -
Another day, another dollar. Well, a dollar for me... About 3000 dollars for the people billing me out to this place.1
-
If I got a dollar for each time I did well in an online contest, I would be poor as fuck.
like very intense fuck.2 -
So with the advent of Docker Desktop going premium we thought we'd buy a couple licenses... What did the HR team say?
"No, you're fine - we can just keep using it - how will they know?"
WHAT??!!! I will NOT be the one who gets brought into a multi-million dollar lawsuit because HR are a bunch of nitwits. I will fight this with everything I have so that when ouch time comes, i can say i didnt participate in the shady bullshit these people are recommending.13 -
Do you suffer from low motivation ? For three easy installments of $79.95 plus shipping & handling , the secrets of overcoming low motivation can be yours . Act now , don’t delay !
Operators are standing by & the first caller will receive a free set of dollar general steak knives in a faux wood gift box , excellent for regifting for that team party or potluck where if you’re lucky , you might get tofu .7 -
Afaik the supporter program was for 5 dollar a month.
I want to pay more. Because with the 5 dollar, I don't really feel like I am supporting anything at all.
Prove me wrong, guys.
PS: I don't want to buy anything. I just want to pay more.5 -
I am sick of misrotated videos.
Sometimes, the phone camera software saves a video vertically because the user hits "record" before the software has detected that the user is holding the smartphone horizontally, because the software stupidly launches in vertical orientation by default.
So the software wants the user to wait until it has finally detected horizontal orientation, which causes the user to miss out on a moment.
How about the camera software actually saves the video in the orientation it was recorded in for the most time, rather than only the beginning of the video?
If I can think of this idea, billion-dollar companies surely can.
In the meantime, misrotated videos can be fixed using this ffmpeg command on Linux or Windows:
ffmpeg -i input_file.mp4 -metadata:s:v rotate="0" -c copy output_file.mp4
And if the phone was held with the home button to the left side:
ffmpeg -i input_file.mp4 -metadata:s:v rotate="180" -c copy output_file.mp4
This solution is superior compared to using -vf (video filters) because it only touches the metadata of the video. No re-encoding. This means no quality loss and no CPU/GPU power needed to process the video again. It just passes through.
10 -
Wish we can shut down every tech product and service and start all over again. All the million dollar ideas are already realized and the only thing to do is be a rich guys employee now.9
-
Goddamn livid right now.
Our 3rd party Vendor developers' couldn't figure out how to check-in their goddamn code to our GitHub branch so they just sent our PM a zip file via email containing the project with the node modules folder too!!
Wtf.
Why are we even giving them a dollar. 😤😲4 -
This quote made my day.
"Dependency Injection" is a 25-dollar term for a 5-cent concept. [...] Dependency injection means giving an object its instance variables. [...]."2 -
!Rant
I was just listening to a podcast and they mentioned patreon. Not sure if you two, @dfox and @trogus, thought about creating a patreon page. I would definitely support you guys for the work and time you two put into devrant. Would be awesome to have some method to tip you guys some dollar for a tea ;)1 -
Be me, get a consultant job, go to a supposedly great client that has fame of getting scouted by Google. (attn: I doubted all this shit before I started)
Learn the basics by a awesome mentor and trial/error stuff at the same time to get the hang of things, after that was done, I noticed there was no documentation whatsoever, code is spaghetti and your documentation, good luck!
Royal spaghetti, you can't make heads or tails of it, dev code in production, empty try/catch blocks, empty statements, if (true)... (incl. their core classes)
Keep in mind this is a multi milion dollar company...
Someone please understand my pain...6 -
Everyone's bitching about how costly a College Education is , and that cost makes everyone see it as an option.
While here in Kerala , India my Entire 4 year Btech in CS costs less than 2000$ dollars, it's that cheap , that College is compulsory.
The million dollar question is should I be happy that College is cheap or Sad that College isn't an option2 -
I've worked for 2 firms with billion dollar revenue on contract basis in last years, but I'm still a year away from graduating.
It feels suffocating when after a great night of work I have to go to class among people who don't care about programming at all
I just want to graduate and leave this place...
Ps. Attendance is compulsory in my college and I take computer science classes
Pss. I already make thrice of the highest package in offered in my college for last three years!5 -
How do you respond to the person who says this: "Hey #{insert_your_name}, I overheard that you are a programmer, I would like to tell suggest you a billion-dollar business app idea"?6
-
What if sites like Fiverr and Upwork are actually preparing us for when we all have to compete with third world programmers working for a dollar a day? 🤔2
-
Another log in issue because of moving from country to country...
If only I had a dollar for everytime a system didn't let me in after I moved... I'd be financially comfortable.14 -
No offense...
But if I had a dollar for everytime, I faked a laugh in my office. I wouldn't need the job anymore.
*Surrounded by fucking dumbwits in the office*1 -
you know what im tires of?
Finding a good domain name for a potential business, unregistered, and then using algorithms, the registrar itself snipes it and cybersquats it as "premium".
In otherwords, if you do find a good name, theres no point becauss it'll just be immediately labelled "premium" by an algorithm and lock you out with 5,000 dollar pay wall.
people in 2003 didnt have to deal with this shit. Registrars should be allowed to do this.
Five domain names now, out of a couple dozen I tried, the five good ones I came up with, all five, "premium".
It wasnt like they were even .coms or common words either. Hell one of them had a number in it.
Nope "we have determined spontaneously, through algorithm, you haves selected what may be a valuable domain name, thank you for the service of identifying it for us, we will now reserve it, even though no one else wants it, at a prohibitively high cost."
Like a homeless women finding a winning lottery ticket in a parking lot, and the rich fucking owner running out demanding that she give him it because it was lost in HIS public parking lot.
Like you motherfuckers dont already have enough? You know what a good domain is? Its a basis for credbility. Its the difference between whether people use your service or not. Its the foundation for excitement or interest.
And here we have this "algorithmically marked as premium" bullshit, fucking the poors out of any chance of even a good start.
"Haahahaha cocksuckers, you're not internet startups in the early two thousands! If you dont habe five grand go drop on a dpmain name that isnt even fucking owned, enjoy staying part of the fucking lowerclass!"
These fuckers. Cant believe this bullshit.
Just another day in motherfucking america, where you have to start rich to even get ahead. just one more way gen x, gen y, and gen z got fuckity fucked right in the ass.
fuck this country so much. fuck it all.
never even gonna have a chance to own a home or anything else.
nobody ever offered me a real fucking chance, not once in my god damned life. not even my fucking parents.
might as well drink myself into a coma.13 -
Wtaf?
why are there only two of seven characters of the Webservice password, when the request goes out in my docker container?
Answer:
The password was retrieved via PHP getenv()
Soooo....
If there is a $ in an environment variable, this $ has to be escaped with $$.
fml
Everyday another thingy to learn ^^
xD1 -
CSS is magic.
CSS is a katana blade.
CSS is a tiny bristle scratching Gorilla Glass Victus. It shouldn't exist, yet it does.
CSS is a plastic-based sticker that you peel off, and it leaves no residue behind.
CSS is a summer breeze of 2004 that you felt while riding longboards with your girlfriend.
CSS is plugging a '86 Les Paul into a Marshall JCM800 and switching to a dirty channel.
CSS is diving into a freshly made bed after an evening shower.
CSS is getting your winter coat and finding a hundred dollar bill in the pocket.
CSS is the front right burner.
CSS is stomping onto a Big Muff pedal before you do solo.
CSS is David Gilmour inviting you for lunch.
CSS is cracking open a cold bottle of Perrier.
CSS is falling asleep in the attic hugging your loved one and watching the stars.
CSS is a glass of just below the room temperature cold pressed orange juice after you run 5k.
CSS is stepping on a scale and seeing yet another pound of body weight gone.
CSS is a supportive, beautiful person saying they love you just after you escaped an abusive relationship.
CSS is putting on your cold white gold Rolex in the Friday afternoon before meeting with friends at the bar.
CSS is discovering your old Sansa Clip+ and booting RockBox.
CSS is giving cunnilingus to Mary Elizabeth Winstead.
CSS is finally feeling empathy to another person after two years of therapy and realizing you're alive.
CSS saying "unleaded" after you pull up to the gas station in your vintage 911.
CSS is your ex-boss apologizing to you after they hit the rock bottom.
CSS is smelling her hair in the back seat of a Maybach taxi.
CSS is giving presents to your grandparents.
CSS is hitting bong while watching Home Alone with your friends after New Year's Eve.
CSS is getting a new job that pays 3x your old one and removing your old job's Jira bookmark from a bookmarks bar.5 -
Let me share a million dollar worth of advice with y'all
RGB makes your code run faster and gets rid of errors. If it doesn't work, you're not using enough RGB.7 -
So I started working at a large, multi billion dollar healthcare company here in the US, time for round 2,(previously I wasn't a dev or in IT at all). We have the shittiest codebase I have ever laid eyes on, and its all recent! It's like all these contractors only know the basics of programming(i'm talking intro to programming college level). You would think that they would start using test driven development by now, since every deployment they fix 1 thing and break 30 more. Then we have to wait 3 months for a new fix, and repeat the cycle, when the code is being used to process and pay healthcare claims.
Then some of my coworkers seem to have decided to treat me like I'm stupid, just because I can't understand a single fucking word what they're saying. I have hearing loss, and your mumbling and quiet tone on top of your think accent while you stop annunciated your words is quite fucking hard to understand. Now I know english isn't your first language and its difficult, I know, mine is Spanish. But for the love of god learn to speak the fuck up, and also learn to write actual SQL scripts and not be a fucking script kiddie you fucking amateur. The business is telling you your data is wrong because you're trying to find data that exists is complex and your simple select * from table where you='amateur with "10years" experience in SQL' ain't going to fucking cut it. Learn to solve problems and think analytically instead of copy fucking pasta. -
When you decide to create a startup and then look for someone on freelancer.com to create your Million Dollar product with a budget of 750-1500
4 -
The fires in australia killed something like half a billion animals, and it's kind of sad, all that potential barbecue going to waste.
We have the means to solve this. With KNAWWWWLEDGE.
What we do is hook up buckets to a bunch of big ass drones and have some sort of contest to see who can put out the most acreage of fire. People will come from all over for the annual "australian fire olympics."
Shit, put a $1 million dollar bounty on "most acreage put out" stream it on twitch, youtube, netflix, you name it.
Fires would be out in a day or three.12 -
Not sure if someone posted this already, but on https://stickermule.com/unixsticker... there's currently a deal for 10 laptop stickers for one dollar.2
-
Fucking product owners. Churning out retarded requirements every sprint and then complaining about how the requirements haven’t been met, just to add new retarded requirements the next sprint.
Hot tip, if your product owner is obsessed over apple events, tell the cunt to go buy a new Apple Watch and suck on apples trillion dollar market value. Fucking goofy cunts.2 -
If I had a fucking dollar for every time someone interrupts me at work. I literally get bothered in the hour by people in QA that have nothing better to do ( not taking shots at QA ). What irks me is when they continue to chat up a storm behind me with someone else when I finally get the point across.1
-
Randomly one day, out of the blue:
Echelons: You now have Workspace, and it’s a requirement you use it. Make it successful because we paid and are paying a large dollar amount for it, and our competitors have reported success with it. We want email communications companywide eliminated by 50% within the first 60 days.
Management: Ok, excellent! We want to do XYZ.
Echelons: Nope, can’t do any of that.
Management: Ok, how about a, b, and c?
Echelons: Nope, nope, nope.
Management: Alright, let’s try 1,2, and 3.
Echelons: Nope, not possible.
Management: What can we do then? We need further direction at this point.
Echelons: One group for all departments, posts, and attachments only. PDF, .jpeg, .png files only. Everyone in the company must be registered within seven days and using the platform. Only mobile devices allowed.
Management: We have almost 10,000 employees, and the SSO aspect alone could take weeks and months.
Echelons: Insignificant as Facebook said it should be easy to deploy. Also, every post not created by admin will need to be manually approved and done so within 5-10 minutes after its submission 24/7, 365.
Management: Ok, solved. A little shaky, but it’s working. Can we increase the number of admins and moderators?
Echelons: Only 1700 employees have registered; the app has been up 14 days now? What’s wrong? Where’s the engagement? Effective immediately, all members of management must be creating and starting 4 to 7 posts daily, including weekends.
Management: Our registration process with the SSO client isn’t smooth and clean across all devices. We had to implement training to overcome this. Can we increase the number of admins and moderators? Can we make all members of management either administrators or at least moderator? Can we at least turn on live streaming and video formats?
Echelons: No! 10 admin and mods max. Yes to streaming and video.
Echelons: Progress update, please. Include ROI timeline and impactful usage data. This must to pay for itself in the first six months and continue to pay for itself long term, along with showing XYZ company-wide growth quarterly.
Echelons: Hello?
Echelons: Hello?
Having Workplace shoved down your throat has been an interesting experience. Anyone have any exciting ideas or examples to share on what they have utilized with Workplace and increased employee engagement?7 -
Are you willing to share details of your salary, or for contractors your daily/hourly rate? If you're not, that's interesting to know too.
Interesting to know;
- Currency (hopefully obviously)
- Location of work (or if remote, primary location of employer?)
- Contract type (FT/PT employee, contractor/freelancer)
- Job title (or general activity for contractors)
- Number of years in role/contracting
- Whether or not you would or have shared your salary with a co-worker (perhaps you're willing to share here but not with a co-worker)
- Gender
The 'Why is it soooo taboo to ask co-workers salary?' question made me think about this (https://devrant.com/rants/1557306/...)8 -
If I only had a dollar for everyone that comments on my rant, but doesn't +1 it, I'd be one wealthy individual.3
-
Why am I not super rich of being a dev my friends ask me. Well, it's Saturday, I have now worked around 75 hours this week. When am I supposed to have time for all of that develop my own million dollar fail?2
-
How hard is it to make a custom steno-lithography API? And do I even need one?
Hi, all. My name is J.A and I am co-owner of 3DPrintedDreams with my best friend. (We are both 17.)
During a brainstorm of what should be the flagship feature of our shop should be. We decided to take user images, (exact specifications TBD), and then use an API to transform them into .stl files so my friend can print it on his 3D Printer.
I am asking how hard or "easy" would it be to make such an API and what would be the bottom dollar if I were to make a collab post here about it? If anyone would be willing to listen, I could explain how all this would work in relation to the full stack of my website.
p.s. I understand that experience costs money and I myself have experienced this, but, we spent most of our money on the Pallete 2 from Mosaic. (about $500).
HOWEVER, we still have some money left. If a suggested price is to much for us to pay up-front, 3DPrintedDreams is willing to pay you in installments dermined by mutual agreement.
Thanks for your time and have a nice day!
-Josh
Co-founder of 3DPrintedDreams, LLC (Pending).15 -
A one time gift consisting of the following in a party bag without any letter to explain why:
A jar of Polski-Ogorki pickles, synthetic motor oil, a Chicago's Cubs cap, a My Little Pony doll and a dollar store clown costume.1 -
Does anyone enjoy their Windows development laptop? I fight with it so much. I would be happy to smack it hard with a hammer for all of the embarrassing things it has done in front of customers.
They are trusting me to build a multi million dollar system yet for some reason I can't join a Skype meeting, or my mic doesn't work, or the scaling on screen makes everything look oversized.
What am I supposed to say? "Trust me to build your system. I swear I'm not as retarded as I appear."8 -
Rant!
What ryms my gears seeing those posts on LinkedIn:
1. What startups need to do to become the next billion dollars corporate
2. App ideas that will sell in millions
3. What every wannabe needs to know to become the best entrepreneur
I honestly don't recall adding other than devs and HRs 😒 -
"You can't argue with the TV"
This statement is true when engaging with people online. The TV has told them what to think. Sometimes it takes a jarring moment to shake someone out of this trance. For some nothing will break the programming.
I can tell when someone isn't thinking for themselves. They repeat the standard media terms, and then use those terms to dehumanize people. They can then dismiss any counter information as being from "those people".
I assume this is some kind of protection mechanism. I suspect people are afraid of being wrong and their ego won't allow this. So the conclusion seems to be: people who don't believe the TV "must" have character faults. Some even have fantasies of harming those who don't agree. I have witnessed this a few times with a few different people. It would be sad to live like that. I don't understand or comprehend that kind of hate. I can only suspect this comes from the TV content. I don't know because I haven't watched it in almost 15 years.
The AP is a trillion dollar propaganda machine. If you can see through its facade count yourself lucky.
Pray for people to wake up. Remember you can't argue with the TV. Just move on.
On a side note. Viewership of traditional AP media is now in the toilet. So I hope that is progress.9 -
If professors that teach programming classes are experts, why are they teaching instead of working for multimillion dollar companies?8
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My reasoning is stupid, I just think it's cute in a pimp my ride kind of way. I heard you like getting colossally pounded in the fucking ass, so we put a virtual machine inside your compiler so you can use your binaries while you compile your binaries.
But there is a practical angle to it, too. It's state, structures and execution within the code itself -- that is, in a sense, generators "embedded" within the source, but without any kind of special syntax.
Rather, the code is all the same, and I'd have the option to make calls at compile time: the output of these calls could, in turn, be part of the resulting binary or processed by further calls.
It'd greenlight the wildest fuckery in the jungle, because *that* is the true and ultimate abstraction: programs that write other programs with minimal human intervention. But is my (still) theoretical, cheap ass two-dollar prototype approach held together with clown jizz and prayers better than the endless cumloads worth of corporate investment that's dumped and pumped into generative AI on a daily basis?
Well... **lights cigarette**
That's what we're about to find out, mother fuckers.1 -
I can write million-dollar-software from scratch but I can't make my i3wm look like anything other than utter shit.2
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The difference between having a million dollar idea and having a million dollars is, unfortunately, a awful lot of work.6
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If I had a dollar for every time my mom tried to literally convince me that I wasn't in fact me, but was an impostor planted by aliens… I would have one dollar.
Yes, it did happen. I was twelve.6 -
if null was the billion dollar mistake https://hackernoon.com/null-the-bil...
then what is javascript with null and undefined24 -
I know I am probably late to the facebook drama, but I think taking out of this all is just how genius and evil all those collector companies are.
I would have probably never thought of collecting data off of mechanical turks and quick jobbers, but they did not only think of it, they deployed their system across multiple jobs, scanning more and more data in from all those connected logins, for less than a dollar per profile, which generates atleast 300 profiles on average.
The real question is why is it allowed for a third party app to actually access all that? even if there's a permission for that, why would such exist?
I really can't see why any application would need access to likes, shares, all friends, all their profiles etc. -
Uni nowadays be like:
Lecturer says everyone should come up with an idea, find out how much it costs, figure out the competition, write a business plan, find out the development costs and indicate your value proposition. Best idea gets an A.
This is more like trading an A for a potential billion dollar idea.2 -
No, I didn't hack your Facebook. You gave me your password. Thank you for assuming I'm qualified to break into a multi-billion dollar company network, though I am definitely not nefarious enough or petty enough to contemplate wasting my time to find out who likes your cat videos.
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I know it’s old hat but…Edge…I mean really how is it still so bad? How do you base your browser of the chromium engine, have, gosh idk, a billion dollar dev budget, and still, still, it’s significantly worse than chrome in every ui/ux way.8
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I'm studying a mix of computer science and engineering. This semester we were tasked with hacking a "smart-production"-production-machine.... And OMFG it's shit!
This is a product by a major company and it's version 4... How the fuck is it this bad?
Like, using the same 5-letter password on all the PLC's FOR THE ROOT USER!!! WTF!!! AND open, unencrypted Telnet.....
This is a million dollar machine and, as soon as a hacker is on the same network it is done for! wtf.... I just can't believe how easy it was to get in and reek havoc.6 -
"Are you sure you want to commit a billion dollar valuation to finish an MVP?"
*Shows only mockups and has a deadline of less than a month*
No thanks. I don't think this company will ever survive -
Last year in uni:
Module 1: Build two projects in a team using java
Module 2: Build a website for an airport using plain php/javascript/css (i had no previous experience with thia pathetic language with the dollar signs)
Module 3: build a website using python
Module 4: Rasperry PI with Matlab
*** I have to study C++ for the job I will be working at after uni..
I really want to specialise in C++ and finally get proficient in it, but hell no my curriculum requires me to know how to do the same exact thinf with 75668888765 languages... fs -
Hey guys, could use some opinions. So I live in a country with a pretty small economy. I've been working at a big company out here for about a year now. Initially my plan was to work here for a year then apply for grad school in the states, try and use that leverage for one of those big us dollar jobs and potentially one of those magic green cards I've been reading about. I work about the equivalent of 35k/yr in my current position. It may sound pretty ordinary to some of you guys, but here it's a pretty huge salary. It's pretty hard to walk away from it. It's now becoming difficult to make the decision of giving up such a high salary, to make the time and money investment in school. Running the risk of spending a year or 2 in school and then not being able to work in the states. Putting the money aside i know that there'll be greater oppurtunity for learning and growth in the states, so it may be worth it for the experience alone. What do you guys think ? Take the risk? Stay safe in my job? look at other countries maybe ? I'm all ears.6
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#Story time.
Been working on a project for 2 months with Colleague "Jim" doing the code reviews. Project is finished in a stable form and can be extended if needed. Then my other colleague/boss "Mo" decided that we need to do a refactor. Fast forward a bit and the conclusion is "Mo" and "Jim" are going to discuss every step with me. And we started a new project that should do the same as the project I just finished
Here some facts:
Every day a meeting/ code review / discussion.
Decisions they make I do not agree with.
I need to redo my work multiple times.
Now this does make me look like a toddler that needs supervision which is not the case.
They want something future proof and something that fits his new coding standard "Mo". and certain things I do agree with and is clearly the better architecture. however somethings are just stupid, time wasting, making it worse. I'm getting so frustrated by the fact that billion dollar companies have clear coding standards that work. and are correct. and this company decided to do their own thing of stupid rules!
- shorten variables
- Keep lines under 90char
- put multiple things in 1 file
- Keep function names short
and many more of removing stuff and let you guess stuff..
I just... *sigh* get so tired of this shit.
*names are randomly chosen2 -
So apple event today was 2 hours long to say....
MOAR screen for MOAR dollar?! 💵💵😂
The only feature I want is the fall detection for when I face-palm now....6 -
Alright, my very first post here was about this project and I am thinking it out loud again.
I see a problem and I am struggling to find a solution.
Now what I am thinking of is to articulate the problem well and state WHY I believe it needs to be solved. There are some reasons which must be presented in a capitalist way.
Furthermore, I am thinking of doing a market research to understand various demographics, validate the idea, and figure out the product-market fit.
Now, this qualitative research and quantitative data will help me decide whether it is worth putting in the efforts to solve the problem or not.
And since, we have an MVP already (funnily yes, we built it before all of the above), that will help me validate the tangible solution.
Once we get a confidence boost, then it will be time to get that single transaction which has net positive cash flow.
Start scaling to 'next billion users', so a billion transaction with net positive cash flow.
I won't be branching out into multiple verticals before be able to sustainably scale the core USP.
And while the second half sounds like, 'I have a million dollar idea', I am trying to be more and more realistic and rationale instead of falling in love with my idea.
I don't even have an idea (read solution) to fall in love with. Rather I have a problem that is bothering me.
So, yes, I am continuing this journey to solve the problem which started in second year of my hostel room and has evolved over 10 years. -
What's more important to you guys. Getting the chance get knowledge or make money ?
I recently graduated as the second best, making a little less then the average (in Germany) but get all kinds of certifications and courses for free and working on a 90million Dollar Projekt using modern technology (Java)
I'm totally happy with this situation for the start of my professional career what u think5 -
I'm pretty tempted to start to invest in a home server to host a few websites from.. I need to find where to start4
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Fuck Uber eats and it's changibg fucking requirements to use their 20 dollar promo !
And who the fuck uses Facebook ?2 -
Love going to out-of-state programming courses on the company dollar!! Went to Germany, Denver, and Rochester, NY for Codesys training. Hate PLC programming but it's fun traveling and learning new things.
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To find and be able to fully deliver one project with a multi-million dollar profit just for me so I can just retire already.
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Budgie up and running. Tho, I had an issue overload cpu, and stopped previews-creator. Is that even safe?
Anyways, half of my customized deepin shit doesn't work properly anymore. It's a piss off. Wondering if a downgrade would help.
If shit stops breaking for six more months, I might be able to finish uni and go back to workforce properly, where cash-cash-dollar can buy me a new laptop, or a workstation that allows me to duck around with current laptop.
Like, being a student again has been so unnerving. Won't do it ever again. (a PhD doesn't count as study 😜)2 -
<!rant>
With very little experience I have become head of software integration on a multimillion dollar state contract. (Whole other story on that part) had a meeting with the states mainframe and DB departments this last week after having worked in person with these guys for three months. They told me that I am by far their favorite employee of a vendor they have worked with. I have put a lot of work into understanding their workflows and making sure we have minimal impact on their systems. Evidently this is a rare occurrence for them. I am just so stoked that I am having such a positive impact on them while still getting my job done. Still have a long way to go, but it is awesome to hear I am at least making a good impression for my company!
</!rant>2 -
How do I resolve this conflict of interest?
TLDR: I want to go out for exercise/health. But I also need an immediate goal. So when I go out, I will always end up buying some junk food.
----
It's such a nice day today. Let's go for a walk, get out the house and some exercise because I also love deals.
Hmm… where should I go? (Need a motivation)
I know let's go shopping! (Only reason to leave the house)
Takes a walk to Duane Reade (supermarket) 10 mins away.
It’s so hot/I want a reward! I'm out already why not get a treat… let's see I can get a large Iced Coffee for $1 (or some other deal) at McDonalds (which is pretty much next door now that I'm here).
I mean isn't that a great deal! I could make coffee myself but only the KCup and well they wouldn't be cold. I want it cold now, not in an hour… (i probably won't when want it then). So that dollar is just for the coldness mostly and i guess the service cost.
Also since I'm here already, i save the food delivery fees (this also applies whenever I order for pickup: I save so much on the delivery costs and I get exercise too!)
Healthwise and financially, this negates any benefit of going out and probably would've been better had I not gone out and just ate the plain salad at home.3 -
> be you, paypal, a billion dollar company
> your react paypal button dist js file, which is a button that makes api calls, is over 1300 lines long
> 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡2 -
Update on https://devrant.com/rants/2127480
So I sent my Pixel 3a with a broken screen to the Google repair center and within 2 days I got a response that there's liquid damage. OMFG.
So now I get options:
1. Not repair, I get my money back.
2. Buy a refurbished one for basically the new price and I might not get the same colour device.
So basically I'm forced to choose option 1, because I could also buy a new one at the same price.
🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
So just due to bad luck I now don't have a functioning Pixel 3a any more.
😢
On the bright side: I explained my story to Google in a contact form and they called me back within 10 seconds. I spoke to the most helpful employee ever (Chris). He was very understanding and called it an exceptional situation. He now is reaching out to the repair center where he can get in touch with the actual repair people and see what can alternative Google might be able to offer me.
I don't expect anything, but kudos for Google's customer support.
Also, why do I keep hoping that this multibillion dollar company would just say: hey buddy, here's your new phone for free, just make sure you will promote it with your friends and family if you like it.1 -
I know someone that’s constantly paranoid about being spied on by the government and fears companies stealing his code e.g. github, Microsoft etc.
His solution:
do nothing until we find a secure platform to write code on so that our ‘billion dollar ideas don’t get stolen’
Suffice to say that he’s a very bad coder, not that I’m really that good but compared to him I’m light years ahead.1 -
I have gained quite a lot of coding confidence recently.
Im quite confident i can deploy a full working application or a mobile app.
I have some inspiration bit i am still not sure of how much work/investment does it take to make something that generates money.
Of course im not including million dollar ideas. No my goal is to make small apps/applications or freelancing jobs off work to generate some extra money (noticeable enough that the investment is worth the return).
Obviously the best way to learn is to dive in and im not asking to know about your golden egg that you are harvesting.
But do you have any tips/advice or experiences to share?3 -
Time to boot up the old ass Macbook Air 2013 I reluctantly have solely because Apple is a dick towards the people their trillion dollar company is built on3
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https://cnbc.com/2018/02/...
Why a trillion dollar company is dependent on someone else's data centres?4 -
I was once working at very successful startup as lead android engineer, when another startup contacted me and offered me a better paid and "stable" position. 9 months later I woke up on the 1st of the month (1st June 2018), checking my bank account: No payment. I go to office, boss comes in : hey guys, we're bankrupt and we can't pay your salary.
Today still no salary, we're waiting now for court to officially declare the startup bankrupt and then Government will pay me my last 3 salaries, while my working contract is still valid for 3 months after company gets declared officially as bankrupt. We're being expected to work as nothing would be, with no money on our bank accounts (we've been even told to take a temporary loan) and that sooner or later somebody will buy us off. Oh, it would be also really nice from us if we would not be looking for a new "challenge". What'd you do?3 -
i think kobenz is borderline autistic
he claims he built a predictor of dollar "exchange rate" price (didn't mention against which currency - warning bells), if this were true he wouldn't be on this site...
THEN he claims he built a "framework" like React in 500 LOC...
💩🤡
lotta trolls on this site, beware...6 -
If I had a dollar for every time a mother fucker in QA distracted me and threw me out of focus..
Nothing against QA but an unnecessary interaction costs me about an hour of downtime trying to back up to speed. -
The Michelin star chef says to a fast-food line cook:
— In my restaurant, we don't use mayonnaise. Better even, I don't need mayonnaise, so as my fellow Michelin star chefs.
— You are idiot. We use mayonnaise and the burgers taste like crap without it.
— Perhaps it's because your recipes are trash and your products are made from waste materials?
— Look. I consulted with my fellow cooks from KFC, McDonald's, Burger King — all huge, billion-dollar companies, and they too are using mayonnaise. The whole world uses it. If you don't use mayonnaise, you can't cook tasty. End of discussion.
That's how I feel when someone defends unit tests. Matter of fact, I can't stand _both_ tests and mayonnaise. Coincidence?24 -
JESUS CHRIST GOOGLE YOU ARE A MULTIBILLION DOLLAR COMPANY HOW THE FUCK IS YOUR WEBSITE DESIGN SO SHIT?
goddamit with the amount of fucking whitespace on YouTube I could fit an entire fucking copy of the website in.4 -
i don't know how is apple a trillion dollar company. even it's chat support needs a support system. i had to chat to a human and all he did was forward my request 😭. Apple is going to lag so far behind in Ai, I'm telling ya. Suck a waste of time.1
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Hi )
I was wondering how do you guys who work or have worked as freelancers price your websites/projects.
I never had a client before and I don't want to spoil my first chance by pricing too high or too low.
I've heard people asking for 500 dollar or 2000 dollars, depending on how much work and time is involved.
How much would you ask for a simple personal website or a restaurant website?
Thank you very much for your time )5 -
Woo time for a Chromebook rant against Samsung!
So they just 'revised' the Chromebook plus (Currently using v1 to write this) and I was intrigued because they ditched the Samsung made ARM chips for an intel CPU.... Buuuuuuuuuut... It's a fucking celeron... Of all fucking things to put in a half thousand dollar laptop, at least an m3 would be useful. Then I find out they are ditching the full metal body, it's heavier, thicker, same 3GB of RAM, ditching the 3:2 aspect ratio (Fucking why?!) and the 'upgraded' keyboard doesn't even have back lighting...
Ugh, makes me want a pixel book more, double the price and a million times the performance and quality -.-3 -
So. Wow I have a question. Ok for real... I am in need of advice. I have a concept for a platform based on a specific interest which almost all of us have, based on a peer-to-peer principle with multiple services and user types/needs/agendas/reasons. The platform is intellectually straight forward and users will all participate on the platform as they see fit which will benefit other users as well as motivate more to join. The platform will serve it's own purpose and meet the users needs in a way that you may have seen before but the intellectual property and how the platform is used, is so unique that I can't risk too much information.
The question is. How do I protect my idea / intellectual property so I can recruit help and market without someone coming along and stealing it out from underneath me?
This isn't uncle Vinnys Cologne idea...
Everyone thinks they have the million dollar winner. I'm not sure if this puts gold toilet paper in my bathroom just yet but... I have something that an existing platform with money will absolutely steal and try to push as their own idea... They will probably succeed too.
So how do I protect this from happening so only I get to fail or ruin this good idea?1 -
Can someone example to me why do people use a VPN when not on public wifi? Like you are already at home with your own private network.
Like the moment you log into Facebook or Twitter or medium or to check your Gmail/outlook whatever, all you are doing is making is making it very clear to the host companies that you are inconsistently paranoid. Because all the sudden the person who's home address is in Seattle, work and home phone are in Seattle and all of their communication is done with people in Seattle. Has their web traffic location encrypted unknown.
Yeah your packets might be encrypted, but you are still spreading enough self identifying information by merely existing on the web.
At the end of day it seems more like a illusion of safety that these VPN sell. At the cost of a good dollar and slower internet speeds.
Unless you got some actual trade secrets and sensitive information, the f is the point for you to use one?17 -
Why do companies waste serious cash in office parties? I'm talking about those hundred-thousand-dollar extravaganzas that major tech companies seem to be addicted to.
Poll after poll finds that most employees would rather have the cash, so "kissing the collective asses of tech staff so that they won't leave" is not an explanation that holds up.
The "Roman Triumph" explanation also does not make any sense. If rich assholes want to flex their immeasurable riches, why would they invite mere mortals that do not put a lot of effort in being famous or pretty? Couldn't they invite the entire Victoria's Secret catalogue of models and the NE Patriots? Surely it would make for much more impressive photos of decadence.
The "Michael Scott" explanation also falls short. Companies spend serious cash on consultants and professional party planners, that are sure to know a lot of people. Money can and often does buy personality, so no rich asshole is ever a party dud.
Why else do they force most of their own staff into what they perceive as a "do not relax or you may get fired" loud and poorly lit meeting that takes hours to dress up for? What am I missing?5 -
As usual, the million-dollar question: whats the best laptop to buy for developers, in the price range up to $1,500?
I'm between a 2015 Macbook Pro, the new Dell Latitude or the Thinkpad T460 😕10 -
Did you know 2021 saw 44 unicorns startups? For people who don't know what unicorns are, unicorns are startups having billion dollar valuation. This made me wonder about startups with no revenue, how are they valuated? So researched a bit on it and penned down my learnings in this article.
https://readosapien.com/how-to-valu...7 -
OMG I want to throw my monitor out of my window right now!
Someone just went through my entire project and un-cuddled all of my braces, AND THEN STARTED ALL MY FUCKING VARIABLE NAMES WITH AN UNDERSCORE!!! Are you kidding me??? People actually do that??? That's literally worse than php's brilliant idea of starting every variable name with a dollar sign!
I can't even read my own code anymore...2 -
My new microphone arrived.
I used to own Razer Seiren, but it died few weeks ago.
Now this cheap 60 dollar mic bundle's sound quality is on par with that Razer Seiren.
It just lacks all the functional buttons and knobs, and of course, a switch for illuminating logo.
Does anyone stream or run a YouTube channel here?
If so, what kind of content?
PS: Please, no links.
2 -
https://github.com/netlify/...
This repository has been archived by the owner on Oct 10, 2022. It is now read-only.
Well fuck, whats the alternative? Absolutely NOTHING in the README that points to any new tool or documentation.
I swear to fucking god I write better documentation for MY FUCKING HOBBY PROJECTS THAN YOU BILLION DOLLAR VALUATION FUCKING DUMB FUCK STUPID FUCK COMPANIES THAT WASTE MY FUCKING TIME EVERY DAY AND HOUR AND MINUTE AND SECOND I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU
I swear I HATE all CA software employees, all that they stand for, and all that they do (apparently not much)
How the fuck can I list out all my users? Just fucking clowns.
God I'm fucking fuming. How irresponsible is it to archive a repository (thereby blocking new issues) and then NOT linking to any new tool or documentation!?!?!?!
I MEAN HELLLOOOOOOO AM I SPEAKING A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE HERE
just leave me to die5 -
To solve problems in life, One must be irritated to have a solution or else it will be a norm to the society... We want to propose something that can eliminate our irritation. I, once commute a trycycle who charged me 5¢ because it was too far to fetch other commuters... So i kicked his vehicle and he drove away. I reported to the traffic office because thats where they record the violation and they never issued this case... I can think of a PWA that lets the commuters to report those pesky and annoying trycycle driver.
We won't display the bio of the violated person but we will put their temp number written in their body parts. So that the commuters wont go to the office just to report, instead. Let the commuters immediately report them. Im ranting because of overcharged fee... Even among of my classmates agree... A hundred dollar idea for this. I really need to solve this because it irritates me... And by the way, there wont be report abuse because the officer will confirm if both parties crossed the line of argument via message/call. Its just within the city so its not much of a deal outside the vicinity
PS. dont judge my english. I suck at it. -
I'm so fucking sick of auto pay bull shit. Auto renews, auto debit for bills... Fuck off folks. AWS just charged me 150 bucks and now it will cause my rent to be returned nsf because their shit only has ACH.
Fuck you amazon. Going back to my 7 dollar VPS. May be an outdated OS version andimited but at least I don't need lube to use them.5 -
Dat $15 dollar game maker humble bundle, I dont know if I will ever need it but damn it feels gud.1
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Heard an interesting idea: along with estimating tasks based on time/points, a dollar value should be placed on it by the product owner, basically how much money they think completing the task would bring in for the company. If this was based off of real data, I could see a lot of tickets being moved back into the back log.
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I just made a complete list of 185+ excellent no-code tools you can use to build your next million-dollar app.
Visit: https://zerobizz.com/p/...
7 -
I started working full-time almost a year ago and I make around Rs 3.5 lakh. A $100k dollar salary in US is equivalent to around Rs 10-12 Lakh in India. Realistically speaking, How long will it take before I can to get somewhere close to that number ?3
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Whyyyy whyyy can a billion dollar company be the last regarding Kubernetes as a service!! EKS has such a fat ass, damn slow to bootstrap and a pain to manage the lifecycle, while all other clouds even the small ones have figured it out. Can't just get it.6
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i am so fucking conflicted right now. seeing my fiture getting ruined in front of my present eyes. Life always gives me a chance to jump out of a ship that's about to fucking blow , i took it the first time, but this time i missed it for bravery ( and stupidity), and now am sinking alongside this fucking ship
my first job was amazing. decent work, sometimes a lot and sometimes too less. i would learn new things ,interact with people, handle a lot of fuckups . at one point i felt like looking for another opportunity , got one giving 50% hike , so i jumped the ship and sent a resignation letter. the noitice peripd was less, so i enjoyed my days applying to other ships. got even a better offer with 100% hike, so from one boat to another to now a literal cruise.
later i got to know that my original company got bankrupt and fired 85% staff. the next month the company that gave me the first offer layed off 30% staff.
now the waters are tough and my cruise is also getting impacted. but instead of firing, they are asking us to come to the office permanently. their office is in a fucked up place: you need 8$ just to breath the fucking air there. its the city of blood and money. and you will be giving away both things there.
my brain got split into 2 parts after this announcement: my stupid self was still considering this while my sensible self started applying for jobs. my stupid self was thinking that this is a great opportunity to leave my fucking nest of a home , where i am liv8ng woth my parents for last 25 years, and learn to live alone. clean utensils, cook food , wash clothes... i wanted to live the life the harsh way.
but life still took a pity on the fool that j am and gave me an opportunity. an opportunity to work with a big brand who hasn't done any layoffs in their 40+ yrs of existence (but also known for giving shit increments)
the offer was just a 40% hike but it was near my home. i could be in office in 1 hr in less than a dollar a day and still earn more than what am earning now.
plus my notice period is now 60 days , so who knows what other offer i could have got in those 60 days ( when i would keep my profile with a big green "immediately available to hire" circle on me.
however this time i didn't jump the boat. i asked them for a bigger raisez they declined and my stupid self was more than happy.
now the company has started to send mails regarding relocation and yepp the cruise is sinking , atleast for me. if i was savingsx in this company, my savings would become x/8 if i go to that city. in the new offer it would have at worst remained x.
and that's not even half of what's bothering me. i had accepted the money loss in exchange of what that city and my company had to offer : a chance to experience WFO, a chance to live life like a mature man and not a kid in his mom's house ,and a life full of hurdles and strangers.
however i always like to keep an emergency fallback mechanism on me , for if things don't work out. I don't wanna go depressed and cut my wrists there, I don't want people to hurt me so much that I can't recover. i want to run away from that wreched city the moment i start to loose the battles there and the city starts taking over me.
but what the holy fuck? my company's notice period is 60 days, and my rented room's security deposit is 6 fucking months? i will be giving 6 months of deposit + 1 month of brokerage + 1month of rent on the first day i put my steps on that wretched land after travelling in a 100 dollar flight! where am i supposed to get this much money?!
and okay, somehow i manage this. say i did an 11 months agreement, paid the fucking 8 months of rent at one go and simply started living a shitty life there. in month 2 i break down and wanted to implement my escape mechanism. it would go like this : i will suck up and try to live for rent free for next 6 months. but wait, THAT'S NOT FUCKING ALLOWED!! iam supposed to get my security AFTER 11+1 MONTHS!! why not freaking adjust it in my rent?
I can't think straight . 6 months of security deposit has blown my brain. i am regretting anything and everything. I can't think of my roommates situation, home safety, room location, whatever the fucks we think while looking for a room . all i can think is ...WHY SO MUCH MONEY NEEDS TO GO AT ONCE!?
FUCK1 -
I was scrolling through my past rants and found this gem
https://devrant.com/rants/2305697/...
I posted it when images were not loading due to expired ssl. Looks like everyone who saw this got tricked!!
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