Secretary of the IT department stated in a meeting that she was "overqualified to babysit a group of 40 grown-ass men who are unable to communicate with each other"

... all devs had a huge grin on their faces because we knew that she was absolutely right, management was furious 😂

She submitted her resignation on the same day, best secretary we've ever had!

Sister called me on my way to work (she never calls me, we communicate through a family signal) to ask if I wanted to come over for dinner in the weekend because a new guy she knows will be there and also my parents.

Me: hmm idk I've got a lot to do in the weekend....
Sis: he saw my laptop by the way, he was highly impressed that its dual booted and asked how on earth I know about Linux! Then I told him about you and what you do and now he really wants to meet you!
Me: what time would I have to be there?

I hate how that stuff can make me change my mind just like this 😅

- Sleep 7h+ each night (you think you don't need it - but you do!)
- drink NO coffee (you've slept enough!)
- pair-up (you're not as good as you think)
- get a grasp on the problem (it's time will spent!)
- communicate constantly (you're not alonw especially)
- refactor just as much
- learn from you partner
- celebrate even small accomplishments (you need success!)
- go home and do something else (your pet project does not need more than 5hrs per week!)
- repeat (because repetition makes perfection!)

Client: Where are we with the project, it's been a week and I see nothing.

Me: You asked me to do something that was not in the agreed scope of work, which has kept me from starting on the project.

Client: Do I need to plan out everything in advance on paper for you to get it done in a timely manner?

Me: Is that a serious question? Yes, you should. That's the whole point of creating a scope of work. It's to allow me to schedule out the time necessary to build out a product in a "timely manner".

Client: I don't appreciate your attitude. This is not how you should be doing business if you like making money.

Me: I don't appreciate your condescending, unreasonable, dickhead mentality that makes you think it's remotely okay to act like you're better than me. Money doesn't grant you the right to be a dickwad, and just because I'm being paid doesn't mean I have to put up with any level of arrogance or disrespect.

I am in this business to make money, but not at the cost of my dignity and self-respect. You will be receiving a full refund later today, not because I have to provide a refund, but because I never want to communicate with you ever again moving forward. Take your unacceptable bullshit somewhere else.

You know who sucks at developing APIs?

Facebook.

I mean, how are so high paid guys with so great ideas manage to come up with apis THAT shitty?

Let's have a look. They took MVC and invented flux. It was so complicated that there were so many overhyped articles that stated "Flux is just X", "Flux is just Y", and exactly when Redux comes to the stage, flux is forgotten. Nobody uses it anymore.

They took declarative cursors and created Relay, but again, Apollo GraphQL comes and relay just goes away. When i tried just to get started with relay, it seemed so complicated that i just closed the tab. I mean, i get the idea, it's simple yet brilliant, but the api...

Immutable.js. Shitload of fuck. Explain WHY should i mess with shit like getIn(path: Iterable<string | number>): any and class List<T> { push(value: T): this }? Clojurescript offers Om, the React wrapper that works about three times faster! How is it even possible? Clojure's immutable data structures! They're even opensourced as standalone library, Mori js, and api is great! Just use it! Why reinvent the wheel?

It seems like when i just need to develop a simple react app, i should configure webpack (huge fuckload of work by itself) to get hot reload, modern es and jsx to work, then add redux, redux-saga, redux-thunk, react-redux and immutable.js, and if i just want my simple component to communicate with state, i need to define a component, a container, fucking mapStateToProps and mapDispatchToProps, and that's all just for "hello world" to pop out. And make sure you didn't forget to type that this.handler = this.handler.bind(this) for every handler function. Or use ev closure fucked up hack that requires just a bit more webpack tweaks. We haven't even started to communicate to the server! Fuck!

I bet there is savage ass overengineer sitting there at facebook, and he of course knows everything about how good api should look, and he also has huge ass ego and he just allowed to ban everything that he doesn't like. And he just bans everything with good simple api because it "isn't flexible enough".

"React is heavier than preact because we offer isomorphic multiple rendering targets", oh, how hard want i to slap your face, you fuckface. You know what i offered your mom and she agreed?

They even created create-react-app, but state management is still up to you. And react-boierplate is just too complicated.

When i need web app, i type "lein new re-frame", then "lein dev", and boom, live reload server started. No config. Every action is just (dispatch) away, works from any component. State subscription? (subscribe). Isolated side-effects? (reg-fx). Organize files as you want. File size? Around 30k, maybe 60 if you use some clojure libs.

If you don't care about massive market support, just use hyperapp. It's way simpler.

Dear developers, PLEASE, don't forget about api. Take it serious, it's very important. You may even design api first, and only then implement the actual logic. That's even better.

And facebook, sincerelly,

Fuck you.

bitchface micromanager keeps telling me i don't communicate enough, don't do enough, am not fast enough, etc.

So i've been sending her a weekly summary of ~50 bullet points of things I did during the week, issues encountered, workarounds found, research findings, who i talked to, etc. all organized by task with links to the tickets.

My work volume hasn't increased (probably decreased, actually) but it certainly looks like I'm doing a lot. probably because i am? but she doesn't listen during standup, so... victory by a hundred bullet points it is!

The Irish minister Rudd said today (for the second time I think) that 'WhatsApp gives terrorists a safe place to hide and execute their activities. Might be a good idea in the future to ban encrypted chat apps'. (not literally like that but it's a good summary of her points)

Imaginary dialog:

"okay so encrypted chat apps help terrorists and criminals to execute their activities"

"Alright, let's ban water then!"

"Wait what why would you ban water?!? How will ordinary people be able to drink then?"

"Why would you ban encrypted chat apps? How will ordinary people be able to communicate securely?"

😐
😶
😮
😧
😓

"could you please just use the standard messaging/social networking thingies? That way it'll be way easier to communicate!!"

Oh I don't mind using standard tools/services which everyone uses at all.

Just a few requirement: they don't save information that doesn't need to be saved, leave the users in control of their data (through end to end encryption for example) and aren't integrated in mass surveillance networks.

Aaaaaand all the standard options which everyone uses are gone 😩

A year ago I would have said:

"Because I love solving logic puzzles, there's no greater joy than finding a very simple, elegant translation of a user's requirements into code"

Then 2020 came. I'm SO FUCKING FED UP with coworkers and managers who miss all the required competence to organize and communicate about projects as they are fundamentally incompatible with the concept of working from home.

I'm quite sure I'm the last one to give up at my work.

The company chat has completely died down. I've tried setting up meetings, but even my bosses show up irregularly, confused about why I'm calling them in the middle of their Netflix marathon.

So if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. My answer is now:

"I'm a developer because I get nearly 6 figures, for going through my Steam Library while completely shitfaced at 11AM. When I sober up in the afternoon, I work on some hobby projects. I get to spend 500/m on ordering sandwiches"

Biggest hurdle for me is living with Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder. A neurological disease which affects the way my body makes melatoline. Basicly I have a set wake/sleep pattern which is extremely hard to deviate from. My sleeptime is 7am and wake up time 4pm.

I worked for 8 years forcing myself to be at the office at 9am because thats the social norm. Got 2 burnouts due to being sleepdeprived, various other issues and whatnot.

Finally discovered whats wrong with my body 3 years ago and found a awesome job at a company where I develop very complex systems which communicate with various stock exchanges.

Best part is that I work on my own and have the deal that I work about 3 to 5 hours a day on site. Then I go home have dinner, do some netflix and chill with the misses and after that I have the whole night just for me. When the world is asleep I am writing code, developing a complex system with NOBODY around me who can annoy me!

For me, this is the biggest hurdle I've overcome.

*1 week into dream job*

Me: I need to communicate this variable to a script running in another thread, how do you normally handle that?

My Lead: oh, just add it as a global variable

Me: oh no...

The head of the software department of a company I did an internship at once said:

'the stereotype that programmers sit in a dark room all day with empty pizza boxes on their desks is wrong. They are very social and communicate a lot'

Me: yeah, for sure ...

Just wanted to say a 'thank you' to all people who bear with my privacy stuffs! I know quite some people who installed messaging apps, signed up to privacy services and so on, solely because --> I <-- want to communicate in private and I realise (I've always realized that though) that that can be tough sometimes.

Also a thank you to those people for not requiring me to get data fed into the big companies :).

Thanks!

"Do you easily get offended?"

"We have a bro culture here. [Some other stuff and examples] So do you think you can fit in here?"

"Tell us about a time you had to communicate with people who are not as technically capable as you."

I can remember more but cba tbh.

Hey Root. Here’s a new ticket for you. It involves lots of things you’ve never seen before, and the only person you can ask is out this week.

Hey Root. Why haven’t you been making good progress every day? Why didn’t you reach out to the guy on FTO? Clearly you can’t communicate. Give me detailed status updates twice a day at specific times, covering <exhaustive list of topics> so I know you’re working. What do you mean “no”!?

Hey Root. Stop working on that ticket, and work on this other ticket. It’s the same thing, but different. High-priority!

Hey Root. You asking questions about that ticket pissed off a legendary golden boy principal dev, and he said it’s a bad idea and that we should have assigned it to a different team, too — you know, the team who usually works on these areas. But we might still have you do it. Please work on the previous ticket that’s in the exact same area until we decide.

Hey Root. Why haven’t you gotten anything done?

Standard Sunday evening I guess:
I wake up, satisfied that I already did all my tasks for this week and most of the tasks for next week.
5 minutes before I'm heading to bed I get a message from my boss saying he's disappointed that there is this one task I didn't finish yet, because he arranged a meeting with a customer about it tomorrow. Well, you know what you fuck, maybe, just maybe you should begin showing interest for your own company and actually use Jira to assign deadlines so people know wtf to prioritize. I'm so pissed off, I've been working for 4 hours straight this evening now, only to bang my head against the wall and realise I can't finish it since I have to buy a Windows 10 machine to test out some features. Fuck you! Maybe tell me next time you have a meeting about a certain thing. Yes, I could have spent more time throughout the week, and yes, you could learn to fucking communicate and show some care for your own company.
English is not my native language, so I can't really express how furious I am right now. And yes, he's genuinely mad at me.

Asked to do a technical interview task. It has expected input and output.

My code does what it needs to and produces the desired result.

Get rejected and no feedback given when asked.

Juniors won't get better if you don't communicate my dude 😒

Yes, senior developers get stuck just as much as junior developers do, the difference is that they get stuck in places that junior developers can’t even access. That is partially because senior developers are expected to do so much more than just simple coding, they need to also grasp and untangle client requirements, communicate clearly and thoughtfully with the team, be some sort of guiding/mentoring/leading figure, make sweeping architectural decisions, and so on and so forth.

A junior developer is struggling with making relevant columns of a table a nice shade of purple. A senior developer is struggling with making sure that implementing new client requirements will not have a destructive impact on the current infrastructure, there will be no regressions elsewhere in the system, tries to pinpoint what prior assumptions the new stuff breaks (it inevitably does), and how to reconcile everything.

I'm a shit programmer

I'm 29 and I assumed that by this point I'd be successful some way or another, either by being financially abundant or technically complex.

I am not, just mildly accomplished instead.

Here'a list of thing I consider challenges that I have:
* I tend to tunnel vision ideas that are terrible or execute them poorly because of said tunnel vision.
* I don't hone my skills, I usually consider my potentials the same as my actuals, as if I achieved everything already, probably product of ny huge ego.
* I communicate poorly with my boss, I sidetrack into thing he didn't ask
* I'm a mess when it comes to reading documentation online, I have the attention span of a fucking fish.
* I work alone, I have 0 networking status or skills.
* I take huge amounts of time to finish my side projects
* Of all the side projects I started I only finished one, the ones that I couldn't finish usually bevame insabely stressful things, so much and so many that I questioned myself many times if I should be a programmer or not.
* I have little discipline or organization, if I work in more than one thing at a time, i get really anxious and stressed.

I am not saying I'm not competent, I think I am (I'm looking at you imaginary scary recruiter googling this online), I'm just not really proud of myself

When you can code thousands of lines but is lost of words when trying to communicate to humans how you did it.

Once, at my first job, the CEO of the company sent a group email in which he essentially lambasted my ability to do my job.

I wasn't even hired as a programmer, I was a data entry guy who learned how to code on the job, and at this point I was literally the only person writing code for the company. I regularly worked 12+ hours every day, and even though I had to learn practically everything on my own I was still getting things done -- at least, I would have gotten things done if the CEO didn't keep pulling me off of my projects to work on whatever his latest ultra-important-idea-of-the-week was. I was even working for an 8 hr/day, 5 day/week salary, putting in extra hours for free.

But no, my sacrifices and hard work weren't good enough in the CEO's eyes, and he chose to say that to multiple people in an email, including investors in our startup. I don't remember exactly what was said, but whatever it was made me so livid I couldn't do any work; every time I sat down to code, I thought about that email and it so infuriated me that I couldn't concentrate. It took me twelve hours just to calm down enough to get back to coding.

After that, I refused to communicate with the CEO except through my boss, the CTO.

If your manager asks for a "rough time estimate" for a project, there is a higher than 99% chance that your answer will be written down and be used in presentations of project roadmap to upper management and/or marketing, who will create a hard deadline based on your rough estimate and communicate this to customers/clients, and then blame you for not keeping the deadline when it turns out (as it always does) that the rough estimate was off by several months because feature creep caused by upper management.

Why computers are like men:

In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.
Why computers are like women:

No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Never thought I will be hired by Chinese software/hardware company located in NYC to code in languages I don't know so well. Instead of lying and saying I know everything about C, PHP and SQL, I said that I suck pretty much at everything, but I'm a quick learner and will study day and night to catch up with their practices. Now I see they have no regret about me, but I still suspect them in hiring me because there is another guy who is Russian too and we all communicate well. Our current squad is 17 Chinese, 2 Russians, 1 Americans. Guess what, I learn Mandarin quicker than PHP. Sometimes a small lie is OK, but sometimes honesty is better.

Senior manager: I cant understand how this project has taken so long?
Me: Well you hired me as a C# WPF developer and then asked me to deliver an android app without any kind of training so i had to teach myself app development and reverse engineer the undocumented protocol it needs to use to communicate with our product.
Senior manager: Ok. I get that, but it should only take around 3 months to get up to speed though right?
Me (to myself): how in the hell? New platform, self teaching, undocumented protocol for a complex low level real-time system, other responsibilities taking at least 50% of my time and i should be as productive as an outsourced app dev company in 3 months???!! FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!

I just had a rather stressful morning. I should've known something was up by the sounds of thunder as I walked into the office.

I sat down and checked my emails. There was an email from the boss who was away on a business trip. The subject read, "CRITICAL BUG" and my name was mentioned. "Great...No time for coffee", was my first thought.

I began searching commits to see when and how the bug came to be. "SHIT! It was my fault", I said aloud.

(A bit of backstory, I am Irish, working in Germany with a B2 level of the German language.)

I now had to communicate the problem quickly with a senior developer who is Russian. He can't speak English well and I would not expect him to speak it. We are in Germany after all. I tried my best to communicate the issue, but I found it so difficult to understand his German in a Russian accent. Normally, in the office I speak German except when it is urgent and I must explain a problem in greater detail through English. I got past that obstacle, however, the real challenge of fixing the bug awaited.

After 2 hours of coding, I had a solution and committed it to the master branch. All the while, I had been replying to the bosses emails with updates, probably with many grammer mistakes.

We have no dedicated testers here and the code is written in a way which makes it very difficult to test (i.e. it was written many years ago). When I had initially written the code, I tested rigorously and found no issues.

Just needed to rant. I need a coffee break now...

I have in my head parts of a game, I'd love to build. A top-down space colonization game. You control various spacecrafts and build spacestations etc. to expand your control.
The catch is that you have limited direct controls in-game. Most of the "gameplay" consists of having your own piece of software running somewhere, communicating with the API and controlling your colony.
Similar to Screeps, but I don't like the limitations of writing JavaScript and uploading it to the service. I'd love for the user to have free control of what language to use. They just need to be able to create a TCP socket and communicate with the API

Talking to myself regularly.

It made it really easy to communicate with my duck later on.

I had this meeting with this new client and where talking about the possibility to exchange data.

And he told how his company now has everything in the cloud and if we also have it in the cloud it should already be connected since it's both in the cloud.

I tried to explain that because its both in the cloud that does not mean it's connected to each other. We still need to develop a way to exchange data.

On wich I got the answer that our data probably is not in the real cloud.

In the end I just said that we can probably exchange data but it the easiest way to accomplish this is talking to someone who maintain the data in your cloud. And we could adapt our system to theirs.

Sometimes it's hard to communicate with less tech savvy people about tech stuff. Explaining things in a way they understand but also is technical correct.

So customers can place orders at our website, but some of the products are actually handled by a third party. We use a web service to communicate about these orders. Obviously, we need a way to uniquely identify each order, and decided with this other company that we would use a simple incrementing integer.

Last week, something strange happened: we could no longer cancel orders by their ID, because according to the web service, the orders were placed too long ago and were no longer eligible for cancellation. But I knew that could not be true: the orders were from last week. So I checked out database, turns out the ID's are not so unique: some refer to two or three orders. Somewhat worried, I contact the guy responsible at the other company and ask him how that could ever happen?

He: "Yeah, when we restart our server, the counter goes back to 1, you see. I didn't think that would be a problem...".

REALLY?! YOU DIDN'T THINK?

Every time I interact with this DBA he treats me like I’m some fucking moron who barely knows what a query is. It doesn’t help that I can’t get him to understand a damned fucking thing, no matter what the topic is. We speak the same language, supposedly, but can barely communicate. I can’t even begin describe how his half of the conversations go because I am unable to follow much of it.

Maybe if I start aligning my fucking chakras and channeling my inner goddamn cosmic peace energy, or whatever it is he’s on about, he might start making more sense? I swear he’s been so high so often that he’s never quite come down.

There’s obviously a language barrier, somehow, but the guy is also such a douche every freaking time. Ugh.

A LOT of this article makes me fairly upset. (Second screenshot in comments). Sure, Java is difficult, especially as an introductory language, but fuck me, replace it with ANYTHING OTHER THAN JAVASCRIPT PLEASE. JavaScript is not a good language to learn from - it is cheaty and makes script kiddies, not programmers. Fuck, they went from a strong-typed, verbose language to a shit show where you can turn an integer into a function without so much as a peep from the interpreter.

And fUCK ME WHY NOT PYTHON?? It's a weak typed but dynamic language that FORCES good indentation and actually has ACCESS TO THE FILE SYSTEM instead of just the web APIs that don't let you do SHIT compared to what you SHOULD learn.

OH AND TO PUT THE ICING ON THE CAKE, the article was comparing hello worlds, and they did the whole Java thing right but used ALERT instead of CONSOLE.LOG for JavaScript??? Sure, you can communicate with the user that way too but if you're comparing the languages, write text to the console in both languages, don't write text to the console in Java and use the alert api in JavaScript.

Fuck you Stanford, I expected better you shitty cockmunchers.

Is it just me, or does nobody read their fucking email? Especially when I try explain how a bug isn't trivial to solve because its based on some shitty design decision, that the managers made, that is practically the core of the app. If YOU cant understand the logic with me explaining it to you in plain FUCKING ENGLISH, than how in the name of baby FUCKING jesus, do you expect me to communicate that to the most complicated machines that man has ever built?!? What in the actual fuck do you even do here?!? I could do your job blind-folded, with terminal access to the db, while a monkey was flinging shit at me!

You want to land a job as PHP developer? About to go to an interview?

There are two ways:

1. Be able to explain the difference between an interface and an abstract class and their purposes. (I shit you not.)

2. If you aren't able to, then simply state you don't know and are eager to learn.

(The second approach might not work if you claimed to know object oriented programming "very well" before though.)

Yet I am astounded in how many interviews people were either playing smart and just rambled on not wanting to lose face. During the remote calls of some special candidates I could even hear them typing on their keyboards in the background googling the answers to my questions.

And the irony is that I thereby had to veto their appliance. As they had lost my trust in being able to communicate honestly. And for wasting my time.

Our domain is complicated and ever-changing and not knowing certain parts of software development is *normal*.

Yet don't just try to fake it in order to land a job. It won't work, and when it does you may find yourself literally in the company of like-minded individuals.

I find the way to communicate with APIs very inteRESTing.

We all work on the same room: Devs and testers.
In order to communicate with each other without taking off our earphones, we use the chat app.
Ok, sometimes the chat app has delay sending messages.

I really, really hate when one of the testers comes to my desk without telling me he's coming to my desk! >:v and this is the reason why I hate it so much: I'm concentrate in my code, listening to ASP or SPA and, suddenly, I feel a heavy presence behind my monitors. I look up and I see a very penetrating gaze from the corpulent tester looking at me (he's tall). Every time he does that I almost have a heart attack D:

"There's a bug I want you to check" he says.
And I check my chat app if there's a delayed message from him. Nothing, NOTHING >:v

Always, when I want to go to his desk, I send him a message

"Is it ok if I go to your desk?" and he says me "You don't have to ask for it, just come here" but the thing is that I do that because I expect him to do the same :/

Fortunately this doesn't happen every day, but it pisses me off, and I don't know how to tell him to stop doing that because I don't want to be like a... jerk? intolerant? I don't know

Client: i'd like to develop for this particular device named the hololens. And i want 2 of those to communicate over LAN as well (holo lense specific data)
Dev team: If you can provide us with 2 holo lenses to try some stuff out, we can do that.
Client: Well i only got one but i need that for my presentations to my clients. Can't you just research something and make it happen without the hardware?

And that is the story of how we now have to do something for hardware we do not have any of. FML.

Why computers are like men:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

Why computers are like women:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Let me share a piece of advice to entry level devs that are getting ready for job interviews that I wish someone gave to me when I was first looking for work straight out of school. Do not focus making yourself look good to this company by trying to make your resume flashy or trying to oversell yourself. Although its important to present yourself sure, but it should not be the foundation for you to base your interview goals around. Rather focus on the company itself. Find out whether the company itself uses modern technology,practices and upholds to project management and the software development cycle, find out how they work,communicate and develop as a team. Simply put focus on whether they are worth working for instead of looking like your worth being hired. Can they collaborate,communicate and solve problems efficiently. Otherwise you may end up getting hired and hating your job. Just a thought and some advice on my own experiences. Hope it helps someone.

Some people think that in the software industry there is no communication and everyone is glued to their screens doing their work. It really fucking pisses me off.

- We write documentation around our code more than actual code so that we can communicate with other developers better.

- We use version control and pull requests to make sure our work is at the required level and it is approved.

- We invented UML to communicate our technical understanding to less technical people.

- We sometimes have more client meetings than doctors have patients. In which we have deal with clients worse than patients.

- We conduct keynotes and conferences and hackathons to bring together communities.

These are just a few things from the top of my head so next time you think of saying that the IT or software professionals don't have "much" communication you better fucking educate yourself as to what the profession actually is.

"What we can do to get all on time? ", manager asks
"Can we have 4 more developers on the project?", dev asks
"No, that's not gonna happen. Let's be realistic", manager says
"Is it realistic to ask 3 devs to ship 20 features in a week, reviewed and tested?" dev asks
"Actually 2 of you, because our contractor goes into a vacation. But you can do overtimes, can't you?"
"I prefer not to but even in that case I can't guarantee that as it's not realistic. But at least can I leave earlier and work more from home more because there are severe delays on the train lines and if I have to commute 4 hours a day it won't help", dev says
"Well, I'm not sure if that's a good idea. You have to communicate with people, you know. We have to ship things. But we can discuss this tomorrow as I have to leave early today. I have to take my kids from school"

Really? Wtf?

I understimate always how long tasks takes. Because of the fear that it is expected to be done quick.
I should unlearn that. And learn to communicate the time it really takes: at least doubble the amount of time of what you're thinking it takes.

Programmers are like bees!

You can domesticate programmers the way beekeepers tame bees. You can't exactly communicate with them, but you can get them to swarm in one place and when they're not looking, you can carry off the honey. You keep these bees from stinging by paying them money. More money than they know what to do with. But that's less than you might think. ~ Orson Scott Card

A web developer has started working on my windows.

How should I communicate with it that I don't want a website outside my windows? Will this be considered a covid layoff if I just throw it off the said window? 🤔

P. S. I'm talking about a spider, icymi.

Focusing. I'm part of two teams that use slack, office 365, email, jira, and Trello to communicate simultaneously. I'm expected to respond to urgent messages--so I'm in productivity-killing notification hell and it's really taking a toll. :(

How the Fuck are aliens going to communicate to us, when the protocols we use for communication are all human made?

My phone just froze. But this one time, instead of being mad at it for stopping I had the thought that it's probably working harder than when things are going smoothly. So I watched with compassion as my phone tried to resolve its internal struggle, it being so overwhelmed that it could no longer communicate with me. It was like watching someone having an anxiety attack. There, there. Take all the time you need, little friend. You're safe in my hands ♥️

My bitch ass employer won't allow work from home saying unless government enforces it, he can't allow it and reason he is giving is that wE wOn't be AbLE tO communicAtE via SkyPE?
I am so pissed that such people. Everyone citizen has non serious attitude that they saying things like "Nothing gonna happen", "Chill, you are panic way to much about the Corona virus", while number of cases are increasing exponentially here too!
WTF,
I have realized that people don't understand something unless it happens to them.
This is shit.
As rational beings, we should be taking drastic measures while we can but NO!
Fuck You!

That moment when you work the whole day to write a discord bot from scratch. No discord.py and other wrappers. Pure websockets, oauth2, https, json loads here and there. Understanding how the discord API works was a real challenge, but I did it :).
Most of my time was spent on discord's gateway connection and identification system.

The bot can renew its token, get all the guilds it is part of, all the channels and users of these guilds, send message and communicate with the gateway.

Tomorrow I will start connecting it to a voice channel and let it "speak". Thinking of combining text-to-speech with it, but I am not sure how well they are going to harmonize together.

People on dating apps say they are very pissed off and frustrated when they’re ghosted.
As a developer you get eager calls from recruiters talking for hours. They say I’ll catch up with you first thing in the morning. An HR manager says I’ll get back to you in 14 hours (in 14 hours?? very precise). Even you get a contract offer from a manager who is rapidly contacts and convinces you.
Than you hear nothing, you are left on read.
“Professionals” communicate in that way. They are also getting paid whilst taking your time. What can you say to random people behind nicknames?
I don’t know what I would feel if they get back and I’m zombied. I really feel like unmatching meh.

It's my 19th birthday today! I've had a good year as a programmer, my best yet actually. A year ago I never would have thought about coding a browser but now I'm building up to it with smaller projects like programs that communicate to each other from other computers, more advance gui, c language and wrapping c with python. I never thought I'd get to this but I'm only getting better and I thank this community for being here supporting me. Honestly I cant wait for this year and I cant wait to post more :)

"How well we communicate is determined not by how well we say things, but how well we are understood." - Andrew Grove

!dev

I'm just fucking glad this day is over

* less than 3h of sleep thanks to insomnia
* unable to get breakfast
* unable to concentrate at work
* Almost falling asleep
* Lunch was not even enough to sate my hunger
* Accidentally upset a good friend because I cannot communicate well in general, but even worse when tired
* Get something snitched away from my by cutting in line
* get told by said person that I should have reacted faster
* get told by said person that they'll sell me the the thing that was supposed to be mine in the first place
* get a half assed apology when they saw that they made me mad (still keeping mentioned item)
* Don't get to meet up with friend for workout
* Get home and don't even wanna do anything

My day.

07.25 early ringing of phone.

I'm usually dead asleep till 9 o clock.

Went to bed at 01 o clock.

Something crushed at work, needed to be fixed ASAP.

No coffee. Tired. Stinking peace of garbage

08.45 o clock - super market delivery came earlier than expected, while la me was still trying to communicate necessary steps to resolve the issue.

Forgot to pre pay online.

Still had no coffee, still a piece of stinking shit, still tired.

Took me nearly 20 mins to get my PIN right.

Poor delivery guy had unpleasant call from chef, I needed to deescalate.

Back to work, people angry for me being 20 mins away in midst of chaos.

Me back to fixing stuff.

Done at 09.30.

One of these days where everything you touch becomes a large pile of poop and no matter what you do it's wrong.

Yep. The rest of the day went pretty much as bonkers as it started.

At least no work on weekend.

Yay.

!rant && thanksgivings.

Sure we troll here. Sure we preach strangers here. Sure we hug unconditionally here. But everything is all cool.

I haven't been here very long but I found this community very good to communicate. In fact, we are talking more than dev related things. But I literally don't see any conflict or well.. shit posts/comments.

Really thankful for that. To everyone.

Question: What does screaming typos in all capitalized letters in a job posting communicate?

I am so fucking done with all these incompetent fucktards!!! Why would you keep a client-brief in secret from your colleagues?! Why on your screwed delusional Earth you think it is perfectly okay if you don’t communicate the changes ahead your team? How could you - microbrained prehistoric dinosaur who petrified to your own semen - think that I can estimate with my time and do my work when you are barely able to think ahead 2 minutes without letting me know the actual scope and deadlines???!!! AND NO telling me the day before NOT GONNA MAKE IT VALID!!!! You failed in life you failed in evolution you played my trust and I don’t give horseshit about your career! Go fuck a hedgehog, eat it and shit out on the same fucking day. Tomorrow a new era starts and prepare yourself as I am hereby vow that I am not going to care any of your bullshit! I vow that every time you come to me with a new task, I will start it WHEN I can and do it between 9 and 17 and if anyone asks I will calmly tell the hard truth about the overbred, human shaped, evolutional dead end you are...

Well, my company hired a total amateur who can't do anything right on his own without copying code from me or the internet and I have to pretend he's helping in any capacity because otherwise I'm a "bad team player" and "should communicate more".

Helped me get over impostor syndrome, at least.

This is by far the best way to communicate "don't touch this" I've ever seen

Unity is trying to communicate with aliens

my mom says: "I've got an app [on my smartphone] so that I can call and internet via my phone at work, so I don't use any minutes or MBs! :) "
me: "So how does your phone communicate with your work phone then? "
my mom: "via the app"
me: "without using minutes or MBs?"
my mom: "yes"

me: "So how does your phone communicate with your work phone then? "
my mom: "via the app"
me: "without using minutes or MBs?"
my mom: "yes"
etc

After months of searching for jobs, ended up I got called by a guy who claimed that he would want to partner with me to start a company. Well, I would love to start one, not without certain knowledge.

The so-called "partner" has a very bad attitude, unable to communicate, blames others for his own wrongdoing, arrogant, gullible and ignorant.

He asked me whether I believe in a deity (God). He demanded me to swear to the "upper heavens" that I will get "eternal punishment" if I ever cheated or betray his every decision.

This is a huge red flag!

I just want to have a "will smith slap" him so hard.

Well, today will be a day of trying to make my frontend angular website communicate with my backend symfony rest api. But after work also have to go to college and learn about ER models.
I KNEW MY ER MODELS LONG AGO.

This picture from one of my favorite series shows perfectly what today will be like.

I don't like marketing people (nothing personal).
Most of those I had to communicate with, do lack anything that would remotely come close to brain activity.
A handful of days before the start of a huge event, for which we made a VR game over 2 months, they have the ovaries to tell us that the spectator TV doesn't fit the event's design and thus the VR game will not be shown at the event.
Wow.
Thankfully, half a day later, their CEO directly wrote us and told us to ignore them and to proceed with the preparations for the game.

My patience limits are huge but our product manager seems that likes to stretch them.

You piece of fuckin shit. You ask for feature A and we agree on the way we will do it. Good. Half way you want to change it's behavior.
Fine, i accept that. Let's move on.
I'm close to finish it and you come and say let's add more on that feature and make it more complicated. I can't say anything, just fine and let me work on it.
Then you and the senior dev that "helps" us don't come to 2 meetings and just communicate via emails.
And then, then you fuckin scums tell me that is unacceptable that i haven't finished it and it doesn't work?
I used my uni time and missed lessons to work on your shitty feature and that you just yell at me?
What about comming to the fuckin meetings so we can discuss what problems occured and how i can overcome them, you sucker?

Just because our boss complained to you that the product is late because of you, that doesn't give you the right to yell at me, you piece of shit.

And the next time you tell me that you pulled the repository and it doesn't work while it does on everyone else i will come and shove your laptop up to your ass.

Memory just came up from reading another rant about static keyword I wanted to share. Involved a network programming assignment in Java back in my heyday.

Fellow student was told that a static member was shared between every object in a class and decided that they could use that to implement network communication (i.e. if they ran the same java program on different machines, they'd be able to communicate by reading to and writing from the same static fields).

Have a memory of sitting in corner of lab overhearing tutor lose their mind trying to (unsuccessfully) explain why this didn't work.

Just closed a TOP PRIORITY ticket with "as designed"..

After a 1 minute talk with the developer who wrote this code, I found it is actually deliberate..
So I just closed the ticket..

but what really bothers me is:

That developer, is sitting right next to the QA.
HE IS SITTING RIGHT THERE..

We are a small startup company, everyone are sitting around the same table..

communicate much?

Let's share information! Communicate! How do we do it? Via email!

You got question? Send an emai!
You want to share some excel? Send an email!
Not sure who to ask? Send the email to everyone!
Have a 100 message long email thread and then need some help? Send the whole fucking thread to me and just add "what do'ya think?"!
Send some attachment in email and then 2 weeks later refer to it saying "but I sent the file to you!"? Well surely I can remember your special email from the hundreds of email I get every week.

I did complain to the mangers that why the hell do we have these mega-email-threads? Why do you send all the meaningles release notes to the whole company? The anwer is simple: all information needes to be transparent and if you don't need the info, then just don't read the email!

And fuck you, you CEO wanna-be who sends seasonal greetings through his secretary and thinks anyone gives a shit.

I was just wondering guys. If all developers speak English.

By speak English I mean easily able to communicate at a basic level because from what I know... all programming language had their base vocabulary in English language.

Just wondering!?

I've just seen the documentation of an api I have to communicate with, and facepalmed when I have seen that some actions return 404 on success. And more bizarre things... Just wanted to make it worse for me, didn't you?
Once at it. Why don't you glue spikes onto my keys?
Ffs

One night, after one very stressful week of production code fixes (I was working on a game with some friends and I created the network infrastructure for P2P and database communication from scratch), I was at my gf's house. After we fell asleep, I stood up and screamed right at her something like "I fucking already told you how X works and how to communicate with Y. Learn to write code properly and after double checking yours then you shall ask me for a non-existing 'bug' fix. Learn how to properly write event based code and use polling you moron!". After that I turned to the other side and fell asleep immediately.
When I saw her the next morning sleeping in the couch, I could not understand why... Only after she described to me the whole incident I started laughing.
After that I just took two weeks off the project and after that period I never actually worked the same way (so hard) in my free time with them.

"What’s the hardest thing to communicate? The hardest thing is to communicate." - Michael Cina

Well today I found out that is perfectly fine to not communicate or look at your phone and be unresponsive while pair programming. They can't even write a single line of code on their own. I'm having to dictate them things by character. How can this be seen as a cultural difference. How the hell are they still employed and the most important question. Why do I need to accomodate to them and find ways to motivate them?
They should be doing what they are paid to do.

When you work in a company that has over 5,000 employees, the sluggishness of how things move and people communicate is sometimes unbearable.

Bureaucracy is the biggest impediment to progress.

Instead of putting a brick wall in front of you by saying "The PO said that you created a bug", learn how to communicate and have a horizontal hierarchy, for fuck's sake.
Even if all my tests passed, they still throw other bugs in my face and call it my fault. Fantastic. I love Scrum. This is not Scrum, this is abusing and not respecting Scrum.

Stupid rules, stupid people.

Trying to communicate with a client's former "web guy" to transfer the clients domain back to my client so I can make changes to the design and make it mobile friendly.
He emails me "it's on Wordpress, so it's already responsive"

Go to double check on iPad and my phone. design is unresponsive...

Today i had my first video conference in English, and i was very nervous and excited at the same time.

I think i were able to communicate my ideas really well, because the other person just asked me 2 times to repeat what i said.

I'm proud of myself (and all the video games, series and tutorials that helped me reach this level of understanding english)

IF ONLY DOCUMENTATION WAS IN ENGLISH

In the past I've seen documentation that is great, and documentation that is conspicuous by it's absence.
Over the last decade, I've noticed documentation is getting WORSE.
I believe the reason for this is that those tasked with creating documentation have become so accustomed to the jargon in their own heads that they have LOST THE ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE IN ENGLISH, and as a consequence simply don't bother.
New terms such as "ThingamyJig" are defined as "A Collection of ThingamyJigs" — so you end up going round in circles and get back to square one.
They make little or no effort to provide simple examples.
If only companies who create languages understood that those who wrote the language may not be the best people to write the documentation.

Me: "Here is the new feature you asked for. You can select from the dropdown and if it's "Other" you can put the details in the text field next to it"

Them: "I need to add options to the dropdown"

Me: "If you need something added to the dropdown, just let me know and we can get it added, but we need to control that field"

Them: "It won't be necessary to communicate with you to add something to the dropdown"

Me: "Yes. It will be"

Got an assignment in school to make an easy project in c for embedded real time processors with a free complexity level (it was really early in the course and many had never been programming before).

Since I've been working a few years in development I decided to create an own transmitter and receiver for an own protocol between processors (we had just spent a week to understand how to use existing protocols, but I made my own).

The protocol used only 1 line to communicate with half-duplex and we're self adjusting the syncing frequency during the transmission. I managed to transmit data up to 1 kbps after tweaking it a bit (the only holdback was the processors clock frequency).

Then I got the feedback from our teacher, which basically said:
"Your protocol looks like any other protocol out there. Have you considered using an UART?"

Like yeah, I see the car you built there looks like any other car out there, have you considered using a Volvo instead?

Couple of jobs back we got bought out by that massive shipping company with the red and yellow colors.

We used macs and some high up moron decided it was a good idea to put on domain policy restrictions on our macs, but developers can't work without admin access so if we wanted to keep said admin access, we had to sign a written agreement indicating that we were not allowed to do certain thing, like change our wallpaper or install personal music players, you know like Spotify, which at the time was what most of us used.

Now this was just a nice cherry on the cake of stupid descision that was making me rethink working there. Thanks to the high demand for skilled front ends, it was 11 am when we got this, 3pm I had comnfirmed my interview for the next day.

An hour later our manager called us all in to explain this was BS formalities. Well too fucking late, learn to communicate you dumb shit.

Managers should not communicate with a customer then sit on it for a week or two before passing it to a Dev as high priority/fix it now. They also should not say our 'team' is working on it when that team is one person who is also busy with other tasks.

If hiring managers really want to hire based on skill, what they should be doing is testing for one thing:

The ability to take a specification, written in general language, notice deficiency, communicate with the 'client' (manager) to hash out what needs done, and the (explicit) ability to read documentation on libraries or tooling outside the dev's core skillset.

If a dev can read a spec, talk to a client to work out whats lacking, and then identify what they need to know and where to find it, thats 90% of the skills they need from what I can see.

tl;dr version of it, is they should be explicit about the requirements for reading/implementing specs and finding the correct documentation.
Something along the lines of
"can you form your letters? Are you able to follow instructions on the back of a cake box? Then there may be a position waiting for you!"

ask about his game code logic he will rage, ask about how his front end code doing he will rage, talk to him about my server so that his front end code can follow he will rage.. and the end of final project which I merge my code and his code (I need to refactor nearly everything) he said you are very hard communicate. _. fml

Had a couple occasions to feel like a badass, recently.
I'm the only programming polyglot on the team. They've been wrestling with an encryption problem. I crack open C, make a few calls to wincrypt (yes, I'm sorry, we're a Windows company) and give them a dll they can call in their IDE. They were stunned by how fast it was.
Last week, my manager asked if I could put together a communications module for our flagship software.
Him: will 3 months be enough time?
On Monday, I had an alpha of the module ready, and a standalone simulator of the module, and a couple different examples of how to communicate with it written out in python.

Ok so we just signed a new client with some "artificial intelligence" back-end...

To authenticate with their back end, they developed a FU**ING GET REQUEST so the username and password are passed in the URL.

Then we get a token that we pass in FU**ING GET REQUESTS to communicate with their "artificial intelligence enhanced" back end.

I can't even. I just can't.

"Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people." - William Butler Yeats

The people. I find devs to be (obvious generalization) prone to: not take criticism, not understand the difference between fact and opinion, not understanding that it is perfectly acceptable to change your point of view when presented with new information that will conflict with what you currently believe in. It is a sausage fest brought to you by eons of very fragile male ego in the making, and many other qualities that were very much diluted in a lot of the other fields I have worked on: from retail (shitfest) to import/export all the way to military (another shitfest, for different and rather dangerous reasons).

I have met some amazing people in the field, don't get me wrong, but the quirkiest of mfkers i have met make me believe that maybe I AM the one that does not belong in the field (top kek).

On a more technical side, basic stuff like reading comprehension, attention to detail, the ability to translate complex problemd to pieces and that interconnect among the themselves, the ability to understand the grand mathematical scheme of things, the ability to be patient and despite what the above generalization would have you believe...the ability to communicate with other humans with tact and understanding as well as a spirit of collaboration, etc etc, are definitive traits to consider if you want a career in software development that leads above just being a code monkey.

Shit like that.

I love arriving at work to see in a mail that a co-worker is literally saying "please test things before delivering it"

Like I did it, it worked, and most importantly, it's their part of the code that had a problem.

Fuck off, learn how to communicate without reproaching stuff you should have done before

web technologies rot your brain into a festering deadly biohazard mush. web technologies are the worst thing that ever happened to this world. fucking festering web shitosystem fuck this disgusting stupid fragile opaque bloated universe-sized chunk of retarded pukeshit.

I JUST WANT TO MAKE FUCKING GAMES, NOT HAVE MY BRAIN AND SOUL CONSTANTLY ROTTED BY THIS FUCKIN MONUMENT TO UTTER RETARDED LOBOTOMIZED HUMAN INCOMPETENCE FUCK YOU ALL FUCK ALL THIS SHIT FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK DISGUSTING FUCKIN MINDRAPE PEDOPHILIACS SHOULD STOP FUCKING "INVENTING" SHITPOOLS.

WHEN
THE
FUCK
WILL
SOMEONE
COMPETENT
BE
THE
INVENTOR
OF
SOME
PIECE
OF
IT.

whoever were the rapists who "invented" php, js, html, css, SQL, and all the bullshit about how it's supposed to be configured and communicate with each other should have died of starvation in a fuckin ditch while being raped by squirrels... before they managed to "invent" any of that disgusting shit.

fuck you with your fuckin linux bullshit philosophy which keeps rotting all your brains thinking that this is fine and it can be fixed just by piling more and more layers of fucking shit on top of all this shit.

FUCK.
YOU.
ALL.

GOD DAMN !@^@ react-native bridge to #@$^&ing objective-c bridge to an intermediate objective-c friendly #$@!ing swift class to communicate to a @$#!ing external swift framework #$@!ing POS!

And $!@# you Apple Mach-O Linker error!

I get so fucking awkward and autistic when i sit at work 8h a day and just work... I cant fucking communicate with people. I behave like the most extreme "nice guy" beta shithead and its hard to fight it.

Went to put coffee in the sink now and a girl was washing the dishes. In the same time another girl was coming into the kitchen. I stopped and wanted to wait for her to wash them. The girl walking in looked at me weird. I was turning around pretening like im searching something. She asked hey do u need something. I then turned a 360 in place (oh my fucking God) walked towards the sink 1 step and then 1 step back as if i forgot to walk. Then i replied i just wanted to wash the coffee. And then i awkwardly put the coffee in sink for the girl to clean my coffee too

So fucking embarrassing!

Only when i work from home at my pace within my environment ALONE (im the biggest introvert) is when i dont become autistic. I can communicate. Im an alpha chad

Well I'm officially terrified. My biz/coding partner in a project had to move back to China about a year ago. We have been working on a project for about 2 years. About two weeks we had to use different VPNs about every 30 minutes so we could communicate because Chinese government keeps cutting it off. He said the virus is much worse than reported and he was to be imprisonment in his house. I have not heard back from him in over a week. ☹️

Ok, so I REALLY HATE ChromeOS. MY story is this: I'm using Chrome, and I want to get a file from my computer to my phone. Simple enough, I just plug my phone in, and... oh, wait! First it has to open two new windows for my phone's two storage areas. Ok, fine. I close the windows, get my file prepared, and I click/drag it over to the folder I want. Except, the computer doesn't FUCKING see it as a device anymore. It knows it's attached, but it doesn't fucking communicate with it. Ok, maybe it's a cord problem. Nope! Same issue. Maybe I need to update? Nuh-uh! That doesn't work either, since my computer's not supported anymore! And, the cherry on the top of the fucking shitcake that this whole situation is, the Files app, the one that you use to view the stuff on your hard disk? OH, IT JUST GOES AND CRASHES. I can open it! Nothing shows up. No devices work. It's just stuck like that until I reboot my machine.

God... FUCKING damnit, chromeOS.

What the fuck is wrong with Google?!!

Trying to log into Gmail.
Forgot password.
Gmail: To reset, code from authenticator app is required.
Me: Super. Good thing I set it up.
Enters code.
Gmail: Recovery email.
Me : Uh... Forgot that too.
Gmail: Some email address to communicate.
Me: Super!
Enters some other email address.
Receives mail with a link.
Me: Finally!
Opens link

Gmail: "When did you create your account?"
Me: Uh... If I had that kind of memory, we wouldn't be dancing right now.
.
.
.
Gmail: Sorry we couldn't verify you.

WHAT THE FUCK, GOOGLE?!
What sort of sadist play is this?!

Dropped them a mail to get access back. Got a link in the auto reply that explains how to repeat the above process. WTF?!

What the actual fuck?!

Riddle:

Alice and bob want to communicate a secret message, lets say it is an integer.
We will call this msg0.
You are Chuck, an interloper trying to spy on them and decode the message.

For keys, alice chooses a random integer w, another for x, and another for y. she also calculates a fourth variable, x+y = z
Bob follows the same procedure.

Suppose the numbers are too large to bruteforce.

Their exchange looks like this.
At step 1, alice calculates the following:

msg1 = alice.z+alice.w+msg0
she sends this message over the internet to bob.
the value of msg1 is 20838

then for our second step of the process, bob calculates msg2 = bob.z+bob.w+msg1
msg2 equals 32521
he then sends msg2 to alice, and again, you intercept and observe.

at step three, alice recieves bob's message, and calculates the following: msg3 = msg2-(alice.x+alice.w+msg0)
msg3 equals 19249. Alice sends this to bob.

bob calculates msg4 = msg3-(bob.x+bob.w)
msg4 equals 11000.
he sends msg4 to alice

at this stage, alice calculates ms5.
msg5 = (msg4-(alice.y)+msg0.
alice sends this to bob.

bob recieves this final message and calculates
the sixth and final message, which is the original hidden msg0 alice wanted to send:
msg6 = msg5-bob.y

What is the secret message?
I'll give anyone who solves it without bruteforcing, a free cookie.

C: what technologies are you using in this product?
Me: we are using celery which uses kombu to communicate through redis. Additionally, we have beat tasks that run and check the state of workers
C: was someone hungry when they named these frameworks?
Me: Possibly, but I just got hungry naming them.

Honestly, the most underrated skill in tech is communication. Writing clear, succinct emails and telling the story without rambling is a critical skill. If hiring comes down to a wire, I would hire a dev that can communicate well than someone with pure technical skill but zero communication skills.

I was searching for an internship while studying abroad (7h timezone difference, I was expecting some difficulty to communicate). I also sent my resume to a friend so he could pass it around.
So one day I receive this mail, with a company telling me they're interested in my profile. When reading through the previous messages below I see that actually my resume hopped from my friend to one of his to another person etc...
Quite glad that this human link brought me an opportunity, I ask for an interview over Skype. When we finally settle for a date and time, "interview" starts by him basically saying me : "We'd like to hire you, do you have any questions?"
Well that was easy 👍

Building an interface for a client between industrial power quality meters and a database that serves a webapp of data.

Client had heard of a way of sending data between meter and raspberry. From some manager in a big firm.

Currently we where using modus to connect the meter to a raspberry. This method was tested and proofen to work. Both devices could talk to each other in modbus.

Client kept demaning to use mbus, and was nog listening to any reason because the firm suggested it. In the end we end up going modbus to mbus to send it to the raspberry. There the mbus was converted back modbus. Because the meter could not communicate in mbus.

Really weird experience to program something so useless. But protesting about it was going nowhere and taking more time than the changes would take to implant.

Building a website using Wordpress and Visual Composer for a client is pretty easy, right?!

Until the clients wants to change one of the icons to sofa “you can’t use image, and visual composer has a list of only 5 icon libraries and none of them has a fucking sofa icon”.

Manager says just do it today!
Ok no problem.. just had to figure how visual composer communicate with the libraries to show them in the module area, edit the function, create the font/svg files for the new icon, edit the css file of one of the libraries to add the icon. And boom its working fine!

No tutorial about this stuff so had to figure it out by reading the code and see how they did it so I can do it.

After finishing this, they just gave me few more changes as I have done nothing.

Thank you

I just thought of a terrible scenario. So here it is:

You invent a revolutionary machine which can communicate with the dead. It's a marvel of technology and could reveal secrets about the afterlife.

After turning it on and getting in contact with the dead, the only thing they want to talk about is how much you masterbate. They literally will not talk about anything else.

Would you share your discovery?

A story about a helpless intern : On a fine day an intern was assigned a feature to develope. He worked his ass off, completed it, submitted it for testing, the build was approved by the tester and got released the next day. Fast forward a few days, the feature is failing in few cases at the production.Everbody, starts pointing fingers at the intern.
The intern wonders...How the fuck am I gonna know this fucking use case, do they really expect me to to build a full proof feature without telling me about all the possible senarios...And how the fuck did the tester approved this...? I mean, now that I know this senario, it seems pretty obvious that it should have been tested...!
Note : This also happened to another developer who recently joined...The PM failed to properly communicate all the requirements and the fucking lazy ass tester did not consider all the possible senarios. And the script failed in the production...!
Note : It's 4 fucking AM and the intern still can't sleep...

Follow up on a previous rant:

I visited a customer to talk about the reporting discrepancy between two applications.

It turns out the applications were custom built by outsourced developers from Russia, that communicate with each other through a byzantine (and completely undocumented) series of web services, excel import/export tasks, and a customized SSRS environment.

These are spread across at least half a dozen servers, some on-premise and some cloud based, there are at least 3 SQL servers (2 running 2005, one running 2000), a 10 year old local install of TFS (which no one knows a username/password for), and who-knows-what-else.

They laid off their entire IT team years ago, and they have no backups.

I'm not certain anyone there even understands what the software is supposed to be doing beyond the most general terms.

No one knows if they even have source code.

Biggest case of "nope!" I've encountered in more than 20 years of IT experience.

There are 2 types of people that I can't stand:

- Designers who thinks they can do the front-end as they use Photoshop

- Programmers that thinks the front-end is easy enough as put random bootstrap columns everywhere

Then when something doesn't work, they blame the front-end developer.

Try to communicate more, assholes, and do your job.

I don't know the current total number of daily active users and rants counts on devRant. But maybe it would be nice to have a group tagged/mentioned feature. Or something similar. Or subscription to a tag?

Like for example, when it comes to security and privacy and google-free-life all of us usually mentioned linuxxx and the gang. When it comes to server, if I'm not wrong Linux and electrical hardwares for Condor, etc.

But there might be (should be) other who should be mentioned and who would want to get mentioned as well.

Might be fun as well. All those Raven and clans can communicate easily with such feature.

Thoughts anyone? If I got positive responses here, I'll open a feature request on GitHub 🤔

Fuck you external API that only exists to communicate with us for refusing our connection at 1am

PM and CTO (direct boss) are always too busy to answer questions. CTO goes for hours without responding when I need him to clarify some task or to get access to something so I can set up something else (configure some server, whatever). PM is more available, but doesn't have the technical knowledge. CTO comes after hours asking me how the task is going, and refuses to make a call so we can communicate more effectively about stuff (whereas I never deny that to anyone when they need my help). Then, when I get late on tasks, CTO comes to me like "man, if you get stuck, ask for help". Like what is even the fucking point of asking for help if nobody will answer?

This is so fucking frustrating.

Whatsapp REALLY needs a feature to silence the notifications for messages that are image only!

I'm now stuck having to communicate with a group for work so I had to un-silence it's notifications but I get sent 100+ memes and videos a day by EVERYONE else.

As much as I love them if I have to stop coding to check my phone only to find a fucking meme one more time I think I'm gonna snap...

Two days ago I wrote the deployment instructions. 5 lines. I sent them to the devops four days before the release (two days before usual).
A colleague of mine leashed out and had me send another message to say to ignore my instructions because they "generated too much entropy" he is releasing too his application and we should create a single instruction file. Okay, I see no reason to do that nor how that helps the devops. A longer file is not easier to understand than a smaller one.
Today the devops deploy our application. They make a backup of the new files and promptly overwrite the original copies with the files from production.
I lost 3 hours today. My colleague is refusing to communicate the error properly to the devops and I have a meeting in 20 minutes. I love my job.

I don't scream because my teams are in a different country and we communicate by IM and email.

I do write long ranting/passive-aggressive emails or type really quick replies when I'm pissed though. .

An example of the latter:

Boss: I need you to make a "quick" fix...
Me: hmm ok sounds like we should implement it like ...
Boss: I was thinking something like this... since it's a temp fix
Need: (typing faster) why is it a temp fix... why not builds it properly so it can be reused
Boss: but that takes time, this is quicker
Me: it's bad design because ... (Typing so fast I'm making typos)... Anyway I can do it. This is better...
Boss: ... ok fine... if you can finish it before deadline

i was having a really hard time because there was no record of changes in code, the boys would communicate changes in private and I'd spend hours trying to figure out why i couldn't compile. when i asked my boss that they put that info somewhere, he said it was unnecessary and that it always worked that way before i came. ofc it worked, it was 2 guys coding. i couldn't work properly and everything took forever to sort, no one tried to help. i went to hr and they just told me i was right and that i had to be patient. i quit soon after

Becoming member of a political party.

I met a lot of smart people, had many great debates about different issues, yet most of all: I learned how dangerous group dynamics can be. (It's insane how fast Us-vs-Them-group-thinking can manifest itself.) I learned to reflect myself (the hard way) and that if I want to convince someone, rational arguments is not enough if you are a dick about it and that sometimes the how you say things is so much more powerful than the what.

Basically, I learned a valuable lesson on how (not) to communicate. I still profit from that on a daily basis in my work as a developer.

(On the other hand, the whole experience made me rather cynical about the state of the world at large.)

So I got some new methods to call, when I tried to call them the usual way, it didn't work quite well.
Surprised, I asked the coder of them.

"Yeah, we're using the new way, you don't mind ?"

nah, no problem, I'm starting to develop my skill in divination and mind reading, that was just my usual training.

You want to change the wifi network to which is your embedded device connected?
It's easy:
- The native process is broken
- ESP is in the correct state, but refuse to communicate with anything
- Restore to default doesn't work
- Flashing default firmware doesn't help
- download the whole NodeJS/NPM
- compile two perl binaries
- bump into 2 year old bug, that your Intel wifi won't connect to the ESP SoftAP
- reinstall the Intel driver, just to find out it's still not fixed
- connect the external Atheros wifi adapter
- connect that shit back to the cloud

And just after little under 4 days of fiddling with GPIO pins it finally works and communicates.

My GOTOs are:

- Check if focus on teamwork is emphasized. Does the company state themselves? Spend a day with the team if possible, see how they work together.

- What tools do they use? Sometimes this will hint you towards whether or not you will encounter a good environment or a jumbled mess.

- Is there organized communication? I know, sometimes there are too many meetings, but that is better than too vew. How often does the team meet, even if just for 10mins? How does management communicate with the team? What ways are provided to give feedback? Are suggestions to improve practices welcome?

I left my last company and joined my current one, where these things work out the way they should. While I liked both projects with respect to development, my mental state has improved dramatically in the new environment. Stress is down, productivity is up. I love my job.

So uhhhh, I think maybe someone is trying to communicate...

Y'all go share some love with them.

Introduce Git - Promote Collaboration
In the real world they won't work alone. Instead of giving individual projects give them a module to work for.

Example project: Library System
Student 1: Sign-up module
Student 2: Log-in module
Student 3: Book sorting module
Student n: x module

Output: A working system

With this approach, students will learn to work with a team and communicate properly about the project they're working for.

It's really strange being an intern at a company, and having 95% of your co-workers be 5-10+ years older than you. The age gap makes it feel hard to communicate and make any friends. :/

I fucking hate Microsoft. I fucking HATE it.

I'm supposed to be setting up a Hyper-V VDI environment on a Windows Server 2019 instance. I got all RDS roles installed, but can't see any fucking templates to make a collection out of.

I don't think that the RDVH role got installed correctly because it can't communicate properly with the RDCB, but both roles are installed on the SAME SERVER. I get stupid and unhelpful errors like "Error: 0: ScenarioBasedDeployment: Job Finished for Cmdlet" and when I tried to create a Quick Start Deployment: "QuickVMCollection: Provisioning job failed. Reason: ". Yeah, I typed that correctly. No reason listed.

I reach out on Technet, and I'm told that I need to contact Microsoft Support directly because my problem is beyond the scope of the forum.

I try contacting Microsoft Support, and they want to charge $499 for a one-time helping fee.

My company does not want to spend any money, and we do not already have support services.

I'm supposed to have VDI set up and working by Friday.

Fuck YOU.

It was in old days when I was working in java and windows systems.

Java and different log4j versions across dependencies caused system not working only on production server.

Turned out some of libraries got log4j embedded and conflicted with other log4j.

It worked in all computers except production one.

Actually that was my main reason to switch my career to python after that dependency hell.

Another one was windows server 2008 tcp connection limit set to 200 or something.
We needed to change registry to get our servers working. After this case we finally managed to convince people to switch to linux.

Anyway any non standard error when you got multiple layers communicate with each other is hard, practice make it easier to solve those problems as your success moment comes faster.

I have been a developer in one company or another for over 27+ years. Today I had to dismiss / fire / let go of a recently hired developer (a Senior by career length) on one of the teams I now manage. Basically imposter syndrome compounded with an inability to communicate a need for support (even when we reached out daily to assist).

When I had to let this person go I felt all the times when it happened to my colleagues , and to me. Like a thousand knives stabbing . It wasn’t easy.

It’s of course not easy to be dismissed . But it’s also not easy to be the one to dismiss.

Had you known what he knew (1), had the training he had (2) and had the objectives he had (3), you would have made the same decision

the holy decision-making trinity

don't be quick to judge or question others' decisions. You don't know some things. S/he may not know as well.

A company I worked with makes an "effective communication" class that every employee must follow.

...
Still, they cannot even communicate properly internally.

Scaled custom help desk software across 5 school districts. Way harder than it sounds when you realize that we needed a tunnel to get an external site working, complex routing to get the servers to communicate with one another without exposing one districts network to the others. And I also made it auto deploy on a successful CI test. The only thing that really perfectly worked on the first try was the database (CockroachDB). Everything else was a complete mess of DNS and routing rules.

I was an introvert while growing up hence I found interacting with non-living things easier. When I was 11 i.e. like 17 years I told my parents to enroll me into computer classes. They didn't see much of a future in it so they refused. I fought hard and finally they agreed. Hence started my journey with computers.

First week all students were allowed to explore the computer we were assigned and also were taught to play basic Windows 95 default games to make it interesting. It was all fun. Next week the teacher said he would be teaching us how to tell computer to do what we want i.e. programming. Hearing that I could make my computer do what I want excited me a lot. I felt I could finally communicate to a computer. This is how I learnt BASIC. I was so amazed I could do so many things like take input and do calculations etc. I decided I would do this kind of job in the future if it exists.

So now I am actually doing what I wanted to do when I started programming i.e. coding job!

Some of yall really need to learn git and learn how to communicate with other people and fucking be considerate human beings who are not fucking all leaches off society but goddamnit we can’t have nice things. All it’s gotta be is ruthless assholes in this industry I’m fucking so done I hate everyone in dev and I want out I FUCKING WANT OUT PLEASE GOD KILL ME

fired in the morning, feeling happy! in 39 minutes later, having next job in the startup I worked for before.
yeah just would like to add, not only be honest, but communicate.. on friday I was laughing with colleagues hacking open source, today I guess they are more surprised than me.
so yeah don't just say empty words without deeds in behind, adding the picture to make you guys feel corny

In my experience object oriented is very good for composing high level abstractions into a complete system. Functional is awesome for validation, parsing and massaging data in any way and imperative is tithe most useful paradigm to handle side effect dependent code that either manipulate the computers state ( read/write) or communicate with external systems.

The people acting as if one of them is the one true way are misleading you.

Several years ago, I interviewed for a popular site and it was the only one of the many interviews I did that suffer that did Google-style whiteboard problems and nobody peppered me. I didn't recall the optional way to reverse a linked list right there and then. I think I came up with the right solution and failed to communicate it well.

When we got done, I could feel their eyes trying to burn holes in me for wasting their time.

The iPhone is only good for consuming apps, that's it. If you want to use it for anything else, good luck.

Its keyboard is miserable.

Its browser is the new IE.

If you connect to a share folder, at random you lose all networking and you have to restart the phone.

You don't reliably get notifications so good luck explaining to your boss or client or girlfriend why you didn't reply back for hours.

Once the battery permanently dies, you're just expected to spend another $1k for the privilege of this suffering.

It took over 25 edits to get to this point in the message. I had to restart this status symbol 3 times in the last 24 hours in order to restore its ability to communicate. It is agony to use this substandard pile of garbage and it has objectively made my quality of life worse in the 18 months I've had it.

It's an iphone 12. I bought it new from the store. I thought Apple only intentionally made older phones unusable through updates, but this has been unusable since the beginning.

I can't share it but I basically just wrote an email at work that's pretty much a rant.

Basically something like should we use Java for this new component? It needs to communicate with our existing server written in JS.

And someone was like no we should stick with JS and Node because that's what the website is written.

And so I'm like wtf... It doesn't matter as long as everyone agrees to follow the same rules... And then added a part about commenting and documenting stuff being more important so I don't need to keep doing CSI on the codebase when something blows up.

"What we got here is… failure to communicate." - Cool Hand Luke

Take a computer, any computer. Remove all the useful shit that makes the operating system actually work and rewrite all the prompts in simple English. Just for fun, give it the complete inability to perform everyday tasks that a child could use an Etch-a-Sketch for. Put all the useful settings/options in the background and make updates look like they're going to install up until the last minute until they error with "Unknown" as the only reason. Now interface it with your cobbled-together backend system and REQUIRE it to communicate with that system for EVERY task.
Then paint it silver.
There. Now you have a Mac.
Fucking toys!

What is the social networking programmers use to communicate.
Hey guys.
So what program do you guys use to communicate? Something that I can drop here and not behing spammed. Time to start creating my own network arround you guys... You know, smart people.

When I hit the endpoint from Postman it works. When I hit the endpoint from my application that pushes data to the endpoint it doesn't work, returning a 404 status code. I KNOW the endpoint is there and operational and that both Postman and my application have the same endpoint configured, letter for letter.

So lost. So confused. What the hell is going on.

I decide to install Fiddler to monitor the traffic to see if I can see anything helpful.

I initiate the request again from the application and immediately see that the request size is huge. BAM. It immediately hits me, the payload to the endpoint is too big and the server is "rejecting" it with a 404. I post a smaller request with the application and it works fine.

Yay, saved by Fiddler.

Why does the endpoint default to 404 in such scenarios. The definition of 404: "the client was able to communicate with a given server, but the server could not find what was requested"

In my case, the 404 returned was a red herring. I understand that the substatus code gives more information on why the 404 was returned, in my case the request size being too big, but 404 in general feels like the wrong status code to return because the endpoint IS there. It made me troubleshoot the wrong thing.

Thanks, IIS.

After javascript, coding in C# feels like I have to communicate with a deaf person with using only one hand. :D

Trying to code a Chrome extension with Native messaging so that it can communicate with my python script. Just kill me.

Can't even get the example from Google to install correctly.

FML

So i was working on an android app that communicate with restfull web service. I setup everything , started the web service api at localhost and launched the app on genymotion (virtual machine android) .Nothing seems to work . I checked the code , debugged some stuff and it turns out i couldn't communicate with the api server. I tested the api on my browser and nothing is wrong ,I tried to test on the phone vm browser and voila 404 not found . How the hell it's working on my windows and not on the vm (with localhost url :/ ) .I kept debugging for more then 3 hours with no solution to be found .
The moment I realised wtf I'm doing and how stupid I was => shut down my laptop went to coffee shop and bought a lifeless dark espresso .

In case you didn't understand what the issue is, I was running the api on my windows localhost and testing it with same url on my android vm (I should've changed localhost with my machine IP )

Agile/Scrum is the worst project management style in software development.

Rather than focusing on delivering a feature or changes on the project, everyday there is always a meeting that you need to attend to, other than the daily huddle. And those meetings are none of your concern or why they needed you there

And my Product Owner and Scrum Master does not know even though how software development cycle works. When you discuss technical details or constraint to them, they either look confused or don’t know what to say and just say “If you need anything, always communicate or approach me” even you already told them the issue.

Or maybe we are doing it wrong. But it is been 5 years when they implement this Agile/Scrum and we are still bad at it.

Just ranting

Not a DRV rant bit I am Maaad AF here

I am doing an internship at an amazing company. Everything is going well and I have learned a lot. This internship is for 6 months and almost 4 months are remaining. Now this shitfuckery of obscene ignorance that I call my college , wants every student to attend classes no matter what. I have already told them the status of my internship but they said "college is more important ". Along with this they want 2 projects in this semester and my HOD said we have to give developments of our project weekly

When I told this amazing piece of human knowledge that I won't get off for every week and I will be using git , he can see my developments and we can communicate on slack etc.
This humble genius said with utmost compassion " what is got, I don't use it , come daily to college". Man, first time in my life I have ever given that Michael Corleone stare at sollozzo killing death stare.

Indian colleges are messed up.

Open office plans are a GREAT idea. Nothing says productivity like hearing a pin drop from across the building. Who needs good acoustics anyways? And you bet your ass the moment anything sensitive to background noise is going on you're no longer allowed to communicate at all, because even a potato plugged into an audio jack can hear you whisper from 50 feet away. Good thing we don't do that often - only on days that end in Y, I assume.

~rant
I think we need to change way how websites deliver themselves to its users. This HTML CSS JS clusterfuck is just a huge PITA in the ass.

What is a website?
It's an application where users find, communicate or share information, can buy or sell their penis pumps and loads of shady stuff.
Why must a website (the delivered application) be split into multiple languages/scripts and lots of HTTP requests?
In my opinion, PWA is a start to make us look at websites more like apps as we are used to on the machine, but they don't solve the mess.
Per my experience, many people working on websites regularly confuse what's executed on the server and what is on the client. They send data to the client via XHR, for example full DB tables of private data, just to then filter it in their beloved Array.filter function.
You can tell those people again and again and this is why I start thinking that the Web, as we know it, needs a big change.

I truly hate PHP because I know nothing about it. I thought writing an API would be cool and it was until PHP stopped cooperating. Why won't my API communicate with my app WTF!? It's like it's not even there even though Apache is clearly serving the page.

Egad! An actual rant is revealed!

Lamers who insist that informal or oversimplified stuff be written are damn annoying.

God forbid the appropriate use of a four-syllable word.
In what world is "uncanny" a strange word?

Is "blessed are the authors of good documentation" such a difficult sentence? Call the linguist; this shit can only be interpreted by an expert!

"U WRITE LIEK A ROBOT!!!!!!!!!"
Piss off, trog. Some men like succinctness and just wish to communicate without a great deal of ambiguity. A bit of clunkiness is preferable to a bit of ambiguity.

Pants are apparently shat when proper sentences are encountered.

If writing coherently and correctly implies being pretentious, then the world is beyond repair.

Also annoying are lamers who insist on wasting other men's time by asking questions which are perfectly suited for search engines.

Reaching through the monitor and beating the crap out of people sometimes seems a bit tempting. But doing such a thing is infeasible... and would probably result in felony charges if such a thing were feasible.

Every time the same fucking shit. Need to form groups for some uni project. You hear from your group members how excited they are and can't wait to code some shit. AND AT THE END I AM THE ONLY MOTHERFUCKER WHO CODES ALL THE SHIT DOWN. 4 MEMBERS AND NO ONE EVEN CARES TO COMMUNICATE. LIKE WTF.
And then you here stuff like "I wanted to start and I see that you finished the story and I need to understand what you did there. Everytime I want to start a Story you finish it" MOTHERFUCKER THERE ARE 19283120 OTHER STORIES THAT NEEDED TO BE IMPLEMENTED AND THERE IS A FEATURE IN TRELLO... "ASSIGN TO ME" MOTHERFUCKER. PEOPLE IN THE MID 20s ACTING LIKE LITTLE CHILDREN GOSH

"What’s the hardest thing to communicate? The hardest thing is to communicate." - Michael Cina

Fucking egos. Why is it so difficult to communicate with some senior?
Senior: we need to support old browsers.
Me: What about using polyfills.ts?
Senior: that's not what I am asking for. what's wrong with my implementation?
Me: check whether a global function exists at one place does not solve the issue. What if people use global function somewhere else
Senior: is the pr breaking some features for old browser...

Fucking hell

Fucking pimatic.... I'm not fucking able to send just raw 433MHz signals like in pilight. Now I have to use the fucking shell-execute plugin to communicate with pilight to send the correct codes to my RF Sockets.
(Btw the pimatic-pilight plugin is deprecated so I'm not able to use it)

Fuck. But. Hey. It. Works.

It takes courage to use npm as a product. The inability of its leader, Isaac Schlueter, to communicate the reasoning behind decisions pose a risk as a choice for long term toolchain.

My company will move to yarn for now and jump ship to Deno as soon as it reaches all of my check marks.

Scott Meyers.
He's just amazing. The way he thinks, he teaches, is absolutely wonderful. He's inspired me on many occasions.

Herb Sutter.
Absolute beast of a programmer. His guru of the week series is a simple but effective way to communicate concepts and techniques in a language.

There are a lot more - Scott Hanselman, Martin Fowler, Andrew Koenig, Andrei Alexandrescu, Barabara Moo and many more.
They remind me of why I chose programming. It wasn't for money or fame, just to solve puzzles in cool ways. It's the way you can take a simple concept and apply it to great effect that brings me joy and these people do it relentlessly.

Studying human languages.

They are so much more complex than a programming language and full of irregularities and stuff you can't really learn but have to 'feel'. This helped me a lot developing methods to learn new things quite easily and knowing foreign languages are kinda useful when I have to communicate with people too.

Imagine an online, public service, that allows you to communicate with others (for example a simple chat, game, whatever ).
The users connect to each others via p2p. Based on this, you can easily get the ip address of any user directly connected to you. P2p is used to reduce server load, but information is still verified (for example using RACS), so let's assume the data is always safe.

(please remember, this is just a imagined Szenario)

Now the question: AFAIK, the IP address is a sensitive information. Would p2p in this scenario still be 'legal' in the EU given the latest changes in the laws?

This weeks question fits me well, as I am still unsure about the full details of how the fuck this all came together and was about to just rant about it anyway.

Ever since this companies network equipment and cabling has been updated, a lot of vital tools went down and bug out every now and then, at seemingly random times.

The codebase is a horrible mess to begin with and random things execute at random times and at random places spread all over different resources that get random hooks from random physical values etc.

Turns out (or at least what it so far seems like) all of them somehow sync their clock and other variables based on how many (valid-?) requests it gets per measured time and similar oddities, so when the network equipment got updated, that meant that multiple processes now could reach each other much faster and therefore threw off thousands of values and internal clocks.

There's a total of like 600 systems that are all "separate" from each other but all need to communicate in-sync for the production chain to properly work. Thankfully I didn't sign anything yet, so might actually just redirect them to somebody else, I am not ready to age 20 years, even for the amount that would pay.

Project manager asked me to directly communicate with our client.

BUT, he told me what to say and what not to say.

BULLSHIT! All of these business "etiquettes" and formalities are just a waste of time for both the clients and us.

If only I could, I would simply cut all these nonsense and just communicate honestly.

Having a middleman to either communicate a design or decision to a chinese client can sometimes really be the one thing you'd wish you've always had.

I've worked with tons of companies and clients from china and they are often very certain about things like bright orange/green on white/flashy background with black/white/red font, that sometimes you really just roll with it, but having said middleman really helps to communicate why e.g green and red on top of each other - aren't the best choice for a company that maybe wants to reach non grayscale visioned people too.

People who are too cool for old-and-busted OOP, but want to build microservices: networks of independent, encapsulated systems that look after their own data and communicate by passing messages.

Yup, that's totally not OOP you're doing there, kiddo.

Connect my brain and communicate to any computer telepathically.
Not humans, I don't want human brains.
But computers. Sweet little bad-ass machines.

PM: we have plenty of time to develop this app. The client is so slow in providing designs and specifications that it took them 2 months just to give me this lousy mockup where they copy/pasted UI element directly from Photoshop. Btw, i have a meeting this afternoon with them :)
ME: ok. since it's Friday, monday you will update me :)
[Fast forward the weekend]
PM: where the hell is the App ? the client told me we have less than one month to deliver it. why didn't you provide a fully functional pixel perfect prototype yet ? Why don't you communicate with me ?
ME: :|

What the heck!

Are kids these days that smart?! I can't imagine a 3 yr old being able to communicate properly or let alone sit still to learn something properly.

I was dumb af and playing all the time till my 6th age.

Thoughts?

Can we please normalise using JSON bodies for GET requests? Makes life way more easy to just have one uniform way to communicate with API's and having different parameter formats between GET and POST request. I mean, In my opinion it is not logical to do one request with query params and others with data in the request body

Next week is super-efficient-daily-standup-and-monday-status-bonanza-meeting week!

The most effecient way is NOT to attend.

If you have no questions/impediments/whatever and you feel like you have velocity > whatever. Be a no-show!

I am SURE you know what is expected from you!

Hey, younglings! Some meetings are _not_ compulsary. No need to be there if you know the drill. If you are in a good work place, everyone will get it. You’re working. This is not always understood by juniors.

But, communicate what your intentions are! Don’t be quite. Communication are difficult. More is better than nothing! Just right is very difficult to obtain and will never be mastered.

And, Windows 11 really sucks…

Is it me or is Software Development basically just Web Development?

I don't hate web development, in fact, I'm learning to become a web dev myself, but everywhere I look, everyone is a web developer.

When looking for a job all the requirements describe skills that are commonly associated with a web developer role despite the title saying Software Developer, all the developer communities I visit are filled with web developers and web dev topics, any topics pertaining to other fields of software development are close to non-existent, and when I go looking into resources for learning the Web Development courses and paths are much more well-supported than other fields.

At first, I was thinking of becoming an Android dev than maybe later learn some web dev but it looks like it would be a better idea to become a web developer since it would be much easier to ingratiate myself into the communities, find resources, communicate with other developers, find a job and I could even use the web dev skills to make mobile apps or apps outside of the web.

Should I stick with Web Dev or continue learning Android?

Our project manager is a past-retirement-age consultant who prefers to communicate the old-fashioned way, which is to physically pop in to my office asking questions about stuff that isn't even urgent and could easily be dealt with in jira or by e-mail FFS. Way to go disrupting a dev, break my flow and deprive me of my joy of working! He even says it himself: "May I disturb?" My answer is "No, but now that you already did, spit it out!" He's a nice and funny guy, I give him that. But I don't like this particular behaviour of his. I've complained to him directly and also to my boss, but to no avail. This is where devRant comes in, to let the steam out. Anyway, if I have it my way, we will definitely *not* be hiring the same consultant for our next project.

Computer science vs software engineering?

Software engineering is all about people. You have to communicate with the business, realizing their needs, figuring out their processes, optimizing them, all this before the first line of code is written. Then, you have to manage your direct reports, and if you have none, write code with people in mind, people who will read it after you. As they say, code is for people, not for computers. Then, you have to improve the app listening to users, again, people.

I can’t assign a software engineer a role higher than middle if they’re bad with people.

If you wanna do cool stuff with computers and be a misanthrope, do computer science! It’s a very prestigious field where you are left alone with scary math and fundamental concepts. If you’re successful there, you’ll have a mad asocial scientist card, and no one will ever insist to you that people is important. They will just accept that they shouldn’t annoy you, and you are “allowed” to yell at them because you’re “special” and a “genius”. You can hate them 24/7.

Hello, I am new on devrant.

Trying to finally land a job after studying for so long. I must say that for a lot of interviews their questions are quite unpleasant and after interview itself I often feel like an idiot. Guess it's not my thing to communicate that much.

If there are any other devs shy/with an introvert personality: How did you overcome stress and later initial uncertainty in new job?

Apple is fucking EVERYONE over with Safari 12. They are changing how extensions communicate with the browser, they are calling the new type of extensions Safari App Extensions. It means all current Safari Extensions will not work in Safari 12.

The problem with this is that they require all extensions to have this “backend” written in Swift with a VERY LIMITED API. Maybe you want to close a tab with your extension? “Fuck you, you’re not allowed” are Apple’s response to that. On top of this shit show their documentation is horrendous.

They will kill the extension ecosystem with this new approach, I’m sure of it, because most of the current extensions will not be able to migrate all their features to the new approach. They have built the API around specific extension types, so lots of extensions will simply not work in Safari 12. For distribution they will only allow extensions to be distributed via their new(?) Extension Store where they will review your code, just like an app for App Store. Unless you’re in the Apple Developer Program, which is $99/year.

I do not understand this change and I think it will hurt Apple in the sense that people will use other browsers where extensions are not as strictly controlled. Usually I understand Apple’s changes but this one is just beyond me. 🦆 you 🍎.

One evening I put on my Quest2 and have some fun with the Climb2. I fell off the cliff a few times. Next morning my 5yo wakes up with shitty mood and tells me he had a dream how he was on a hill and fell off. It wasva bad dream.

A few days later I was watching The Troll on Netflix. I like this king of genre so I was enjoying it. Next morning my kiddo wakes up all excited with 'daddy daddy, I've had a dream of a mountain!'. 'Did you fall off this one too' - I rush to ask. He says: 'no, but the mountain stood up and it was like a man!'

he's been asleep both times. I was with my headphones during the movie and on 1bar of volume during the climb. He's never seen neither the game nor the movie [or any troll, for that matter]. And I'm not making this up.

How... How the hell did he do that. Do we after all float in some wibbly-wobbly ether we can communicate through?

When I hear the word "service" I think of something that just runs in background and you can do stuff with it. I have no idea how to create one, I almost had to make one on Android and use it properly, now I'm back to Windows and Java and we have something working as a service, I have no idea how it was created and how it does work, I just know how to start, restart and stop it. If you asked me how it works and how to communicate with it - XD no idea lol but let me google that. I have almost 4 years of professional software development experience.

And at this point I'm too afraid to ask ;____;

At my company we have half annual discussions between supervisor and employees for development and knowledge stuff.
End of last year I had a very emotional discussion for over half an hour as somebody with a year of experience on why my stuff can be considered under knowledge. He never yielded in the slightest and tried to push me down in every way.

The outcome also reflects on the payment and therefore I tried to argue that we would need a third party, like HR, to help, which was debated down as to me not being able to communicate.

This is just one of the bad things I have/had to deal with.

Sadly I am still at the company mostly for legal reasons...

Still don't know if it was the right thing to debate and not getting in touch with HR :/

Worst

My last rant did not go down well 😂

I need to clarify.

If you have no communication directly to another dev.... And your creation directly impacts theirs .... And you don't tell the middle man ... You are a twat especially if your aware of the launch that's basically right now !

To be clear.... This guy built their site and database everything .

I had to connect part of their new app to the site... A few pages they wanted in the app.

He changed the links ... On purpose I think to screw over the launch of the app to make me look bad

I can not communicate with him... The CEO hates him and won't talk to him either

So what am I to do?

Not be pissed off about a spiteful dickhead?

Of course I'm pissed

To make people understand you don't send out a lethal update that can fuck up the servers without telling no one... That their might be technical issues

My last week of 2017 sucks! The function that been assigned to me has been 7 months until i doing it without any priority tasks. The bad for this, is becoming worse for the clients and they really want it until the end of 2017, so happy new year motherfuckers.

Here's the story, the function i am doing requires a heavy calculations, and i am no brainer in math, though my logical skills, hopes me up to made it quickly as possible. However i am full of workloads/to-do for the past 3 months, that i am unable to comply my documents regarding my employment!!

Much worse for this is the coding guidelines. There no fucking guidelines at all, like do what i want just to make it work, but my team lead ironically speaking that never touch that because it's already working. Dude, the server response was the real issue there and i was supposed to handle that function because your fucking json was not formatted well! Shout out to git for giving me a saving grace not to fire me.

Lastly, the leader's attitude. You're so sarcastic as fuck! Of course i won't get mad at you on personal matters, i understand. But on work, the way you communicate was not like my any mentor/prof that i ever met!! I hate my fucking work. Hope my 2018 would do my best, AND I AM GONNA MAKE MY OWN GUIDELINES ACCORDING TO YOUR ASSES!! HAPPY NEW YEAR, GODDAMNIT!!