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I have an array of 1037 records. The soap service only accepts 100 at a time. So, I write code to send an array of 100 records at a time to the soap service in a loop and get a response back of, "The maximum number (100) of records allowed for this operation has been exceeded." Well, I'll try 99 records then. Nope same error. I'll try 50 records, nope I'll just bang my head on the desk now since the documentation and error say it is a record limit of 100. 😠
Look at my code again. I was grabbing 100 records out of the array of 1037 records and storing it in a new array, but I was sending the original array with 1037 records instead of the temporary array in the loop. 😢 I'm going to bed.7 -
Once I forgot to break a loop that was supposed to send 100 email to a colleague in the middle of the night.
She did not get 100 emails, she got alot more11 -
Back in the days when I started to learn c I had an assignment to print all the prime numbers between 1 to 100 but didn't know how (with if/for/while)
So I searched Google for "prime numbers from 1 to 100" and used printf to print them on the screen
I got an A+7 -
Everyone that finds out you're an app dev: "So I have this multimillion $$$ idea!"
Me: "I'll do it for $100."
Everyone: "$100!? I'm giving you the chance to be part of the next best thing!"
Me: "Well I guess the 'next best thing' isn't even worth $100."
I literally don't even like telling people what I do 😒5 -
What is the point of having a progress bar if ..
beginning
0 %
after ~2hrs
0%
next minute:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 100 %
installation complete
??6 -
Recruiter: This is a 100% remote position
Dev: Good! That’s what I’m looking for.
Recruiter: But the company does require you to come into the office “on occasion”
Dev: I live 5 hours away from your office so that would be not a good fit
Recruiter: And once covid is over the ability to work remotely will be getting reconsidered. You’ll likely need to move cities in order to continue your employment with them.
Dev: Yeah I’m looking for 100% remote work
Recruit: This is 100% remote! Just with the need to come into the office sometimes now and potentially more later.
Dev: …15 -
Always work below your capacity.. if you give 100% that will always be expected. 70% gives you some wiggle room, plus you're the hero that saves the day when you kick it up to 100.13
-
HR: Everyone must fill out these 100% anonymous surveys about how you feel about our company, it’s leadership, and how likely you are to leave in the next 6 months etc. Please be 100% honest, since again it is 100% anonymous. Reminder! You must use the individual links we sent to you, do NOT use someone else’s link. Oh did we say it’s 100% anonymous?
The Link:
www. surveygen .com/ companysurvey123 ?employeeName=boombodies &employeeId=6969
Dev: …19 -
Client: You can develop a e-commerce system for me right?
Me: Yeah sure, whats your budget?
Client: 100$ and I want a really good vps included in the price.
** FManzi left the conversation **
No more work for inexperienced5 -
Dev: "What if the user has more than 100 entries? How would that display?"
UX: "They won't ever have that many"
Dev: "But what if they do?"
UX: "They won't."
(spoiler: they do)3 -
“If she saves you 100 GB or more inbound traffic per month, she’s the right one.”
— Some guy on Pornhub3 -
FUCK CSS!
I spend more time positioning a single button than learning a frickin framework!
I gave up trying to make a div the same height as its parent. No clue why height:100%; doesn't work!20 -
100+ attendants in the meeting
1 single speaker
random guy every 5 minutes: sorry guys have to drop off
WHO THE FUCK CARES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!9 -
!rant
Ah the joy of tweaking one tiny segment of code to reduce your neural network runtime from 3 minutes for 100 generations to 3 seconds!6 -
Moved to a new place about two months ago.
The internet connection is provided and baked into my rent. Didn't mention anything about speed.
First thing I did was to check with my phone over 2.4 GHz hit about 100/100 and thought.
Sweet! I have the nice 100/100 Mbits speed!
Yesterday I had some issues with my 2.4 GHz band on my phone. (I have a lot of wireless devices, mice, keyboards, headphones, so it makes sense) Couldn't even do a speed check. Was like. What the fuck. Switched to 5Ghz band because it's not as busy with other devices.
Do a speed check.
500/500.
I realize. Wait. I am checking from my phone.
What does my cable connected computer really get?
900/700
Holy shit. I've been connected to gigabit internet for almost two months without knowing.
What the shit. What God have blessed me with such sick speeds?25 -
The reason I wont be buying another iphone but instead switch to android:
- No yearly 100$ license to publish apps
- No mac required
- Heaphone jack16 -
Company: "We only accept the best programmers! 5 years of experience in 100 different Javascript frameworks!"
Also company: Random alert popup saying "page loaded" everytime you click next on application form.2 -
When you realize you're spending all your time on a skill set that would be 100% useless in the apocalypse....6
-
November 2015 - Android users: "How stupid are Apple fan boys paying $100 for a stylus?"
October 2017 - Google releases $100 Pixelpen.
September 2016 - Android users: "OMG! Apple removed the headphone jack! You will have to use a DONGLE! That is ridiculous!"
October 2017 - Google announces Pixel 2 width USB-C for charging and audio playback. Includes a USB-C to 3.5mm audio dongle.19 -
I was wondering why I never have space on my C: drive…
It seems that "Windows.old" which shows as only 500 MB in the explorer actually weighs almost 100 GB. 😑
4 -
People who use smartphones with brightness set to 100% and no blue light filter on a dark bus at night with the display (7+ inches ofc) in the direction of your eyes... thanks, now I’m blind.9
-
Why do people get so unbelievably greedy when there is something for free.
Like "it's a free game server host, let's just create 100 accounts so I can have 100 empty servers"
Or "you can get a free game key if you contribute a lot, so let's just spam until I get the key"
It's so painfully to watch.3 -
Just added Kotlin plugin to my new android project and what do you know, CPU went to 100% of usage.
Aaand the winner is: Fucking Android Studio!
19 -
To all these people that uses mouse a lot, take the time to learn keyboard shortcuts. You'll never look back, will be 100% more productive and 110% cooler in front of everyone10
-
Overheard guy on the bus: "...but I don't understand where variables go in memory."
It took 100% of my will power to not pop over the seat like some muppet to sing song about stacks and heaps.6 -
Me: Hans, Get ze Flammenwerfer!!!
Hans: Why?
Me: They use long instead of big decimal!
Hans: How do they handle the floating values then?
Me: Before sending the request they multiply by 100 and on receiving they divide by 1002 -
I am an idiot. I wrote some 100+ lines of code months ago and I took another look today and it seems like it could've done the same thing in 3. Fuckity fuck fuck.8
-
I am not saying I trust 'the cloud' 100%, but having the freedom to wipe your phone, laptop, or pc at a moments notice without a second thought or worry is an incredible feeling.
-
Girlfriend had issue with her Python code (she does mathmatics, not actual programming):
```
t = 51.74636335135748
i = int(t*100) // 5174, wrong value
```
instead of
```
t = 51.74636335135748
i = int(t)*100 // 5000, right value...
```
She asked me if I could fix it for her.
I found the issue but wanted her to understand what went wrong.
She didn't care "because she didn't have time for it".
Well, then it's quite simple for me: I have no time to help her :^)7 -
MFW the company that have a turnover around $100 million via their woocommerce site only does'nt want to upgrade from PHP5.4 because "it is too much work".
Well fuck you then3 -
The allocation of my time while 'programming':
50% Reddit
25% Stack Overflow
24% Error messages
1% Actual coding
100% Frustration9 -
Reached 100+1 on a single rant...
Devrant raised to 150 +1's in order to receive the stress ball...
2 -
Fucking airstrike alert this morning in my federal state.
Yote me out of bed yelling "The russians are coming!"
Turns out it was planned but what the fuck, the closest siren is like 100 metres from my window.14 -
When you open 100 tabs in Firefox (mobile). Not as cool as the chrome gimmick though (which replaces it with a :D smiley)
7 -
The best feeling in the world is when your code works the first time or when you close 100 tabs when you finish work7
-
The goal of 2018 is to contribute to at least 100 open source repositories at GitHub and maintain the track record.10
-
My manager (who is a PhD) says that the difference between probability and percentage is that the former ranges from 0 to 1 and the latter ranges from 0 to 100.
Now the only question I have is, "Where can I buy PhD?"22 -
When the client writes a 100 page novel about his problems, but never sends the ACTUAL CODE to review.1
-
Biggest problem I've encountered as a 100% self-taught programmer in an internship: Having no idea the meaning of half the words my boss uses when explaining my assignment... I always called most of them "that thingy that does the thing" XD3
-
Just refactored 100+ lines of madness to 5 (FIVE!) lines of code. It's pleasing me and shitting me off at the same time.
Some people still get paid per line of code, I'm convinced.21 -
Yahoo, Kotlin is the first class language for android. So no more fucking Java codes. No more 100 lines for basic configurations. No more null pointer exceptions.
Only beautiful code and fun.14 -
GO FUCK YOURSELF BY A CRAZY PONY SAFARI !
Fucking useless browser that hide by default the fucking dev tools.
And also it fucking supports flexbox but can't fucking calculate height 100%.
Fucking fuckitty fuck.
Have your website with a shitty ui then. Might as well do a popup saying "switch browser" cause even IE manage to understand height:100%.17 -
My professor asked my to write a method that recursively reversed() a linked list. Wrote an iterative version with the same name and called it in the recursive method. How I felt after she wrote 100 for my presentation...
6 -
Editing this method for half an hour. All of a sudden I realized I was editing the wrong method. This was me.
*Slowly presses CTRL-Z 100+ times*
4 -
The code for some of the backend of my 100% custom media server in front of the blurred frontend of my media server. It just looks cool
6 -
Lisp code was live-debugged and fixed with REPL on a spacecraft 100 million miles away
“An even more impressive instance of remote debugging occurred on NASA's 1998 Deep Space 1 mission. A half year after the space craft launched, a bit of Lisp code was going to control the spacecraft for two days while conducting a sequence of experiments. Unfortunately, a subtle race condition in the code had escaped detection during ground testing and was already in space. When the bug manifested in the wild--100 million miles away from Earth--the team was able to diagnose and fix the running code, allowing the experiments to complete. One of the programmers described it as follows:
Debugging a program running on a $100M piece of hardware that is 100 million miles away is an interesting experience. Having a read-eval-print loop running on the spacecraft proved invaluable in finding and fixing the problem.”
https://gigamonkeys.com/book/...4 -
The time I learned loops and I was fascinated by the fact that I could do 100 operations in a few lines. I was hooked.7
-
Copy paste from the internet, usually stack overflow without knowing what the fuck the lines do.
I saw this girl who was tasked with building a spring mvc application and she literally googled(yeah googled) "spring mvc web app" and copied from the first tutorial site and pasted it.
When errors showed up she copied everything from the second link and pasted it ... Wait for it... Without deleting the old copy but commenting it out so each file had 100 lines of code and 100 lines of comment9 -
I have written one answer on stackoverflow that got more than 100 upvotes \o/
It's about downloading google fonts and it's not even on par with the other answers. /o\ -
When you're in doubt... commit as "Refactoring"
It works 100% of the time and nobody is gonna check3 -
Why the hell there is a skype meeting with around 100 participants... And all i have to do is just connect and listen to same 2-3 persons... Repeatedly.
PS- mostly no one even listens😑9 -
My school's servers can only support 100 connections at the same time. So they are always down. It's so lame10
-
Client asks me to implement pie chart on webpage. Sum of figures supplied amounts to > 100%. Pointing out discrepancy I request the correct figures, only to be told that the figures are correct. Very well. One week passes. Receive email from client: "The figures for this chart are wrong, they total > 100%, here are the correct figures...". *Sigh*.1
-
I pay over $100 per year for Apple's piece of shit developer program and the app store connect website isn't even accessible right now.
Great.4 -
Open letter to any website that is trying to implement "smooth scrolling" on their website using JavaScript: stop, consider how awful it is 100% of the time, and kill yourself please.2
-
I'm starting to think that the quality of my day is directly correlated to the amount of times I say "fuck". Today I said and shouted that word for about 100 times.
FUCK!6 -
Someone had the bright idea of going 100% on premise then only having the VPN on the server in the office building with no backup to another server. Well the power went out and no no one can work or work remotely. What a plan.2
-
I just love how liferay keeps finding ways to surprise me...
Customer: need to fix this security issue
me: ok
me: fixed. Testing locally. Works 100%.
Me: testing on dev server. Works 100%
qa: testing on dev server. Works 100%
me: all good. Deploying to preprod
customer: it doesn't work
me: testing preprod - it doesn't work.
Me: scp whole app to local machine. App works 100%.
Me: preview loaded liferay properties in preprod via liferay adm panel. All props loaded ok.
Me: attach jdb to preprod's liferay to see what props are loaded. Only defaults are used [custom props not loaded according to jdb]
me: is there some quantum mechanics involved..? Liferay managed to both load and not to load props at the same time and the state only changes as it's observed...2 -
So after two hours of debugging I get to know that Chrome doesn't differentiate between font-weight 100-500 unless on a Mac, and IE does, but IE doesn't support the <picture > tag 😶
9 -
How to take off with a jet:
1. Have a 2013 MBP
2. Don't clean the coolers and exhausts for 5 years
3. Transpile an app and start a gradle build
4. Enjoy your machine taking off at around 100°C
FFS Apple, 100°C is not OK. Neither is having the fucking fans so loud I can hear them over my headphones. I should probably clean the laptop... Not sure I can open it up though. Company-issued machine.7 -
the moment you get a job offer from am fortune 100 company but its in another country and you cant move because of wife and family ... :-/9
-
Could people that want a stressbal that badly, just buy one?
Lets say the community grew with 15%. So if your rant first had to be "100 funny" to get 150++, you still need "100 funny" to get 175++.
Conclusion: you don't need to be more funny to get a stressbal. releived?
Besides that, it's free, be grateful3 -
100% of the credit goes to my dear friend @TheKarlisK
This is our VPN project we did recently and published it as open source to the world.
Cheers to you my man, Karlis.
8 -
I just saw the most astonishing repo that will be 100% useful for developers who don't get paid by clients
I can't stop lmao
https://github.com/kleampa/not-paid1 -
To the users who complain about small MS Edge banners on google.com, and on bing.
This kind of bullshit to convince users to download Google Chrome is 100 times worse.
6 -
I'm so fucking depressed. I've get 100/100 and 96/100 in the lastest exams but I can't keep going to the university because I don't have money to travel from my home to the building. I have to throw away my career and knowledge. I don't find a job in this fucking country.
Sorry for boring you with my shit, I had to write it.13 -
100% of the code defects from a recent code review are from code copied from elsewhere in the codebase.1
-
Manager: we want to autoplay a video on the homepage of the eCommerce site, and links to go to the blog.
Hmm, do you have "getting bounce rate to 100%" as one of the goals this quarter?2 -
Planning.
- Sales people: we will deploy and install 100 customers by the end of the month.
Meaning: 100 it's impossibile, we want actually do 50, but we set a high target so people will sweat their ass off. But we don't tell them the truth.
- Tech people: no way, we will deploy and install no more than 25!
Meaning: we could do 100 but we would die. We will guarantee 25, but since we are good we will optimise the workflow and maybe we will make it to 50. But we don't want to create expectations.
Big misunderstanding arise if these two language are used in the same meeting.
At least if I'm in the meeting as technical people7 -
Just startup stories:
Our backlog of tasks and bugs has officially reached 100+ tickets, all for me, the single software engineer at our "tech" company.
Huh, imagine that.3 -
just tested one of my the old website i have made on google PageSpeed Insight got 0/100 for mobile and desktop speed1
-
A client just asked to reduce the budget on a project, which I have already delivered. fml. Also, I had a look at wakatime, and realised that I've spent over 100 hours on this project.4
-
i don't know graphql
but the schema.graphql file is over 100 000 lines long and lags intellij
how bad is this?5 -
So there’s this SOAP api I have to use (not by choice, and not the only one i have to use) that returns a bunch of XML nodes to confirm the data sent made it and checks out - pretty standard stuff yea.
Now every once in a while it doesn’t respond (as far as I could tell) so today I wrapped a debug around the soap call, error handler and responses and threw a bunch of messages it’s way to try and force it not to respond in order to be able to put some decent error handling in place.
Well it wouldn’t fail.
100 messages .... all responses good
100 more.... all responses good
And then 100 more.... all respond with “x”, plain text not XML as expected!
Wtf is this shit!!!!!6 -
Man, my product owner is so fucking annoying. I am 50/50 between two projects when really it feels like I'm 100/100 - and the PO of one of the projects always requests that I join daily stand ups and give updates.
CUNT.
I don't always have updates because I'm working with another team. Why are you trying to micromanage me you fuck face. Also, you know when you get those PO's that are totally useless and don't actually bring any real value to the project except in the capacity of being a slimey charismatic weasel? Yah, that's this person.5 -
Have you guys tried the 'recent' rants tab?
It's like going back to the early days of devrant when it was unusual to see a rant over 100++ 😍6 -
New Year resolution 2018:
Actually read / pass at least 2-3 of the 100+ books/courses on professional topics that I bought in 2017.
And stop buying stuff I don't use.3 -
Get one of the 2 startups I’m involved with (one is 100% my own project, other is with co-founders) into a state that will allow me to quit the day job.
-
When I press a button I expect it to respond!
Not to freeze the entire program!! Especially when I need to press this freaking button a 100 times a day!!!
I'm looking at you UNITY 3D!! !@#$%^&*1 -
Programming is the most relaxing job in Quarantine
100% pay
100% staying online
5% work
30% pretending to work and think
20% attending meetings
45% doing everything else not related to work4 -
> Old job does away with working from home
> Half the department of ~100 quits within 3 weeks
It's almost as if IT people want to work from home 🤔🤔🤔4 -
Tomorrow there are 100 days left in the year. How will you use them?
I will read 10 pages of "CleanCode" every day.
(Blatently copied this from Reddit, but was hoping for more CS related goals)2 -
I wonder what "eligible" means. "The few people who learn anything in this program..." I can't wait to write the copy for my school. "100% of students who turn out to be good at things - will do things well." haha.
1 -
When I write “grid-template-columns: repeat(auto-fill, minmax(max(15rem, (100% - (var(--columns) - 1) * 1rem) / var(--columns)), 1fr));” in my coworker’s code and it fixes the CSS grid
7 -
Didn't touch windows for about 8 years and just installing it for the sake playing The Sims 4. Downloading a couple of software and got 100 malware -_-14
-
Love when the client knows more than you and tells you to create a report on an imaginary tool they are 100% sure it exists because their friend is an SEO expert and thinks all pages should be running at a 100 percent on lighthouse. Fml.2
-
Fine don't take my suggestion during refactoring old code. Keep the python code over 100 lines of code...we could have cut it in half, but whatever
-
Programming is the most relaxing job
100% pay
10% work
40% pretending to work
10% drinking water and coffee
20% discussing with other coders
20% attending meetings15 -
Woke up this morning to Amazon charging me over $100 bucks for the web services I used at my Hackathon last month. What the hell, I thought the free tier covered that?13
-
This is getting WAY out of hand.
So I pay for 100/100 internet right.
I get 3/17...
This has been happening for half a year now...
The closest other ISP is 200km away......
Gonna confront them but they're probably just gonna blame my 2 year old 200$ asus router for being "too old"/"too slow".
😂🔫10 -
Today I just spent ~100€ for a 3 year VPN subscription. A lot of money but I feel like I did the right thing.11
-
100 updoots and I actually post this to my linkedin feed
entertain me, devrant, my finger is itching on the post button already
8 -
when you only have 5 hours of public internet access and you spend 2 of them fighting with the network because the router's dhcp rules somehow manage to crash the dhcp service 100% of the time3
-
Updating something that I built 2 years ago and looking at the code like Wtf was I thinking... Reduce 100 lines down to 6. That's enough for today, let's not spoil a win
-
Here in Switzerland 🇨🇭, i have a 100/20mbps internet over cable for 120$ per month, with a fixed ip.
What about you? I’m interested about the price around the world.46 -
My co-worker pointing out there is a problem with my code that isn't implemented 100% yet. Hinting she wanted me to finish it over the weekend.
Yeah FMDL. -
i think mobile and pc manufacturers should reduce the magnitude of 0% screen brightness, it looks 100% at night5
-
found at the mall.
im not a fanboy of any os, but this is a perfect situation for linux.
why would they pay $100 for an os just to control the screen?
4 -
HuGhEsNeT gEn5 Is FaSt.
*Yes I know for some of you, 25 mbps is fast. But it's not here. I've got 100/100, I believe. And soon to have the option for gigabit, I believe.
7 -
Management: Our internal app must be 100% rigid so that we users follow predefined process flows exactly so no mistakes are made while also being 100% flexible so that users are free to go about their business in whatever way they feel is appropriate for their own unique needs. These are the requirements!
Dev: …7 -
God damn it, if you aren’t a member of the devRant discord, please join already. Please.
https://devrant.com/collabs/...
3 -
Achievement of the day:
Reverted a merge from 3 weeks ago (about 30-40 commits back), 1000 ish LOC. Didnt break the build, app worked 100%.
Can't shake the feeling my desk will literally be on fire tomorrow tho. -
The fastest minigun in service fires 6,000 rounds per minute. If you modify it to fire $100 bills, you will need two of them to match the rate of Elon Musk loosing money.
3 -
My Gear S3's charger all of a sudden decided not to stop full charge when the watch was at 100%, so I came home to a watch that was flaming hot and going crazy with error messages that it's overheated, battery going down WHILE charging.
Tried it a few more times, never stops at 100% anymore
Samsung you fucking retards, thanks for trying to burn my house down (again)4 -
i know i sound like a broken record...
but 100$ a year to have the prestigious privilege to develop for iOS, granted by the god emperor Jobs himself....
and no fucking proper output logs during build-time....
100$ a year... professional software...
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
bad nightmare: getting a bug on the day of deployment..
worst nightmare: getting more than 100 comments on a Rant with no ++1 -
Who decides the question of the week? its 100 weeks of devrant i guess, this monday.
@dfox Should have a party and poll on it3 -
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed...compile again, 100 little bugs in the code. 🐞
-
Since I bought my laptop the screen was scaled to 125% (1080p display) so that it looks like a ~768p display.
I like it, it looks good, but now I'm trying it at 100% scaling (15" screen).
Yes, everything looks so small now, and my eyes cried for the first 10 minutes, but I'm starting to like it.
Do you have any similar experience? What do you prefer, 100%, 125% or something else? Why?16 -
These are the rules that apply to all of my JS projects:
- 100% typescript, “any” is not allowed
- strict prettier with pre-commit hook
- no semicolons
- no braces around single argument of an arrow function
- tabs7 -
Best part of the holidays for me has been the steam sales. I grabbed "TIL-100" and "Infinifactory". Both of them are wonderful logic games, and til-100 has you programming in assembly. It's the most challenging yet fun way I've ever programed!2
-
Care to help me with some some-what basic math?
100 characters exist in the ASCII codec.
I'm trying to figure out the minimum amount of characters required to encode them. (= Turning each digit into a two digit char set that doesn't mach any other char set to enable me to do other things with them. i.e: A = dE)
It would simply be: x^2, where x is the number of minimum characters required.. But I don't know how to interact that with 100 to find x.11 -
setInterval(() => {throw new Error("April fools!"}, 100);
Time to make the front end team hate me.4 -
When "Programmers" don't understand how something as simple as git works.
>Do they keep whole repository in a zip file for each commit? Having made 100 commits is there 100 zips with all the files? or is each commit additive to the first commit. so that 1 zip with all the files you just get files added or removed based on what commit you are downloading?
Stuff like this makes me cry.....
-commit 1GB file
-commit another 1GB file
Repo is now 3GB? Seems legit right?8 -
Recruiter:"so I just got off the phone with company X, and they will most likely make you an offer tomorrow, but it's not 100% guaranteed, but I thought I'd let you know"3
-
To all devs out there who don't use the toilet flush in company: FUCK YOU! I WISH YOU 100 BUGS EVERY DAY AND MAY YOUR FUCKING CODE NEVER COMPILE YOU DISGUSTING PIECE OF SHIT!!5
-
Who knew that NOT using results given from an API can actually help.
The private devRant APIs give you offsets in text of where links are in comments and in rants.
It’s EXTREMELY inaccurate and I don’t understand why it’s so hard to write it so it’s accurate 100% of the time.
So I said fuck it and NOT use the given offsets and just hard-find using the built-in algorithms inside Swift to create the range for me. Results? It works 100% of the time. No crashes, no out-of-range errors, no nothing.8 -
After 5 years as a developer, I am 100% sure the users of Stackoverflow are the real Good Guy Greg
2 -
I'm seeing all these people with rants over 100 for the week and i'm thinking to myself: you lucky sobs you get squishy balls... 🙃3
-
I've started participating in my university's student programming club. In one of the core projects I found the following lines of code:
class User(models.Model):
password = models.CharField(max_length=100)
...
I feel like I need to do something about it.3 -
T(x, y)=x*(1+y/100)+√-1
x = hours estimated from Boss. if the boss
y = sum of the features with the following weight:
Multiplatform = 10
Web = 5
social * = 100
blockchain = 100
HTML-email = 10
Every other bullshit bingo term = 20
everything else = 1
Terms that appear multiple times count multiple times.
If the boss didnt give his estimate triple the feature-value and use 100 as x-value3 -
All these companies not going the full 100% remote and requiring one day in the office, would it kill them to do 100% remote? My current role is fully remote and were spread through many timezones and still manage to work well, why don't companies see this and give an option atleast to be fully remote for developers?12
-
dubSmall = lambda x: x*(2-min(1,x//100))
dubSmall = lambda x: 2*x if x < 100 else x
I prefer the first one, and I think people will always hate me for that.6 -
When I realised ruby on rails doesn't serve requests fast enough. It's response times are in 100s of milliseconds while the corresponding framework in elixir serves requests that are sometimes around 100 microseconds
-
In order to remain sane at the workplace, always give your 100%:
-- Monday: 23%
-- Tuesday: 17%
-- Wednesday: 26%
-- Thursday: 24%
-- Friday: 9%14 -
Fucking love it when the windows copy/move dialog gets stuck at 100% with 0 items remaining and I can't get rid of the damn window for 20 seconds.
Windows is obviously the superior OS.10 -
I alloted just 100 gb to Linux while dual booting. Now I need more space but can't extend the partition without messing up the boot sector and spending a lot of time :/7
-
If we could lay off the LinkedIn jokes, that would be great. These things are already more stale than a 100 year old bagel, K? Thanks. The rest of the dev community thanks you. 🙄3
-
100% accurate product description on Google…
Which color of the iPhone 8 do you prefer?
Silver looking as the Fujitsu ESPRIMO Desktop, or Space Gray looking as an HDD? 🤔
Without counting the "Oro Garanzia" (Gold Warranty) looking as Space Gray.
4 -
Guys, why is everybody complaining about apple usb-c ports? Isn't that the future?
Wait four/five years and it will all be usb-c
I mean, 100% chances of inserting the drive in the computer at first attempt. Fucking rad!11 -
When your project leader wants to work 100% scrum and the steering committee, up front, wants to know exactly what will be delivered, what it will cost and when it will be ready..3
-
When offshore overwrites your (100% to spec) content and then logs a critical defect because the incorrect content is showing...1
-
The Microchip LAN7850 is a USB 2.0 to 10/100/1000 Ethernet controller. I wonder how they manage a gigabit connection over USB 2.0 which maxes out at 480MBit. *Thinking Emoji*7
-
Need a dirt cheap tablet for basic bedtime needs, reading, surfing, mailing, movies, music, devrant for less than £100.
Amazon just released the fire HD8. Perfect. Ordered. -
88 hours on the clock
Take one more, pass it around
89 hours on the clock
Maybe my goal next week should be to clear 100 😂5 -
Online logo generator, but it automatically buys an .io domain of your company name and ask you to buy it for 100 times the price.6
-
Like the last 100 weeks:
1. Be a better person
2. Learn something new every day if you can.
3. Get older :( -
When the boss can't even use an email client but insists on telling you that the email provider is 100% integrated into the production application and short story you know it's not. 😑
-
How do you deal with relatively complex Boolean logic requirements?
Here's a simple example, of which I missed 50% of the cases because it was non-intuitive to me:
A year is a leap year if:
- it is divisible by 4
- except it is also divisible by 100
- unless it is also divisible by 400
To my intuition, the logic tree is as follows:
if (year % 4 == 0) -> true
if (year % 100 == 0) -> false
if (year % 400 == 0) -> true
so I ended up with 3 cases and I initially missed all the others until I started coding.
The full solution is:
if(year % 4 === 0) {
if(year % 100 === 0) {
if(year % 400 === 0) {
true
} else {
false
}
false
} else {
true
}
true
} else {
false
}
}
I don't like it when I don't immediately see all logic paths.19 -
IT's going around making sure everyone is able to work from home. It's gonna be like the shining at my house by the time the situation is over. I like having wfh as an option but 100% is gonna do my head in3
-
I think ATM machies works on the most shittiest algorithms ever. One day me and my friend went to an ATM to withdraw ₹500 for me and ₹300 for him.
I entered 500 and got five ₹100 notes. But my friend, he had to withdraw ₹500 because, guess what, the ATM didn't have any ₹100 remaining.
the message "Available denominations are: 500 and 2000" was shown.
If only it had given me a ₹500 note, then he could get his ₹300 too.2 -
lets say I have managed to hack over 100 PCs (not powerful , all in the same building)
what kind of things should I do to them ?
*mining bitcoin is out - those computers are really bad*6 -
When your marketing director says "we're going to market the sh*t out of silver customer's".....I'm over here like "lol", apparently he was 100% serious, I got scolded.3
-
50% position (95 hours a month)
100% of my current compensation (~90k$)
In a company like the one I work in now: great team and great tech drive.
Rest of the time is for hobbies and family.2 -
Dev boy to Dev girl: "What's the time complexity on you loving me, baby?"
Dev girl: while(iExist){
Int n = Random.Next(1, 100);
for(int i =1; i < n^4; i++){
Console.Write("..."); } }
Dev boy: Assert.Fail(); -
Dancing and singing in my house with windows open!
Volume : 100%
With my Shure SM58: http://amzn.to/2jBvChZ
Neighbors yelling out the window saying "Whoever singing, stop the hell off!"
LOL
ElementD - Giving In
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
Windows just got a BSOD and had the classic "please wait while we collect error info, we will restart for you shortly".
When it reached 100% it actually restarted itself and I litturally said "woah" out loud, thats litturally a first for me. It normally just hangs on 100% for about 15 mins before I just power it off manually.
It sucks that I lost my work, but atleast I got to witness such a rare event.4 -
Imagine 100 years from now, what would programming be like?
My answer :
Speaking the commands directly to the computer and hope it runs
Your answer?9 -
Is it normal, that certain cores on linux stay on 100% load whilst the others do nothing, this all while being idle.
8 -
Something I just read
"It’s hard to build a 100% secured system, the only thing you can do is to make the attacker’s job harder."5 -
If I have to train one more person, or answer the same question for the 100 times I'm gonna loose it. I just want...need to code
-
Just saw my teacher clicking 100 times on the arrow button under scroll bar to get to the end of a web page.
Aliens Confirmed -
Quick tip:
An office laptop cant keep unity, atom, github desktop, >100 firefox tabs and ms word open at the same time.8 -
git
Linux
VLC media player
Inkscape
LibreOffice
Metalsmith js
100's of low-level NPM packages I don't know the name of2 -
Reviewing a newly reported bug from the QA team:
Reproduction Rate: 100%
Process: Load x, click y, observe
Result: Sometimes, z happens.1 -
An utility function longer than 100 lines shouldn't even be a single function. Shit, it shouldn't even BE inside the "utils" file9
-
When someone tells you there app is 100% secure just because they use E2E encryption but using the Authorization header is too complex..2
-
If you build a company on the blockchain you're basically committing to 100% transparency with your investors if you fail to increase the value of your token or coin your investors will be left holding the bag. 💰5
-
How many Windows users does it take to change a light bulb? - 100. one screws and 99 clicks the error messages away
-
Has anyone made enough money with their SaaS to quit their day job and focus on the business 100%? I’m considering doing it and just do Lyft or Uber on the side to make up for the salary decrease.3
-
The moment you realize that you don't need more than 100 Points to create an Avatar that looks like you in real life
-
So, it turns out that the "low sugar" biscuits I've been eating and feeling good about, is 18% sugar per 100 grams.
And the previous ones I was eating had 28% sugar per 100 grams.5 -
Whelp, so much for Dell making good on the 32gb sku for the xps 13 9300. 8 days late and 16gb short with minuscule storage at a $100 premium.
"Developer edition" indeed.
11 -
Hm... Windows 11 supported Android apps, and Microsoft Store will give devs 100% of sales.... For now....
Wonder if that includes in-app purchases....
But I sense the return of the Windows phone soon.... If this goes well....6 -
100 dollars to rebuild the whole frontend of their startup. what sort of humans run these Nigerian companies ? smh2
-
that feeling.
almost stress ball. 100+
then I saw that they increase the difficulty to 150+
why? hahaha
-
Does the 99 trick work still when it's like $1499.99 vs $1500...
Do ppl still easily most the $100 diff?13 -
that moment when youre staying at one point for like 2 hours and the mobile Internet works 100%,but the next second everything is dead.. wtf how could that happen????
-
Chrome it's shit. I have been brainstorming in the CSS on a flexbox and its height of 100%.
My website works under Firefox.
The code to win tonight.
And you? You use which browser?15 -
Just came back from lunch with 100+ new slacks notifications about the new iPhones I thought something serious was happening.2
-
Need $2000 by the end of November.
Oh, I forgot about car insurance. +$200
Oh, I forgot I'm changing apartments. +$2000.
Oh, I forgot about my credit card. +$100
Oh, I forgot about food. +$200 -
The man just asked how to make folders with the command line, what on earth is this 100-line nightmare json?
https://superuser.com/a/14187013 -
Wow. Fucking wow. My CPU is an i7 6700K on 4.5GHz. What's this process doing that any single fucking core is on 100% load?!?! After killing these two the CPU load is on ~5%. WTF
(ik it's only on 59% load on the screenshot but it's going from there to 100%)
8 -
Sunday planned to Building a project VS family reunion long drive. No laptop at the moment. Beach later will just watch tutorials in my phone oh well 100 km long driving 😩
-
Today I had the regional stage of the Romanian Olympics of Informatics.
There were 3 problems supposedly : 1 easy , 1 hard and 1 insane.
I spent time only on the "easy" one
No one took more than 50/100 at that problem :'(4 -
The day started well. Two PRs got merged today. Begining step towards open source.
Following this committment https://devrant.com/rants/1241509/...3 -
Today I got a change request that told me I needed to create a report showing orders broken down by their order types as percentages.
Now the order types part involve SQL queries that translate business rules into multiple table joins and it's quite nasty (200 + lines or so).
Naturally the change request doesn't mention any of these business rules and how to tell that orders are of a specific type... but alas!
It teaches me how to calculate a percentage :)
... like "10 / 100 * 100 = 10%"
I don't know whether to laugh or feel insulted.2 -
Upwork should build a anonymous comment section for swearing to the fucking hiring managers who wants their website to be developed for $1002
-
Honestly, people who complain about Chrome using too many resources, it's fucking time to upgrade your toasters or close some of the 100+ tabs you NEVER use2
-
It is surprisingly difficult to make two things equally high in css (without putting height in pixels). Like two columns of a parent div. You can't use "height: 100%;" out of the box like you can with width.
Why though? I understand that height is more difficult that width. But the parent element has a height. Not by me, but the browser figures it out. So why can't something inside it be 100 % of it. Beats me.
Well at least it works now. -
You might want to disable your virus scanner before trying to install this joke. It's 100% totally legit. Virus free. Just ignore the warnings if you see them. It's the real deal.
-
when I am maintaining someone elses code, the class is 900 lines and I loose the context on line 100... then I rely on the test fixture... where all tests are ignored.
-
When you test your code, it passes all 100 tests & still shits in the rehersals of a competition 😌 Only because I wrote a wrong if condition🔥
-
So I was writing some C code, pretty simple code. I had to pass a matrix to a function. The matrix had been globally defined as arr[100][100]. But the actual size of the matrix was stored in 2 vars m, n. Now when defining the function if I do like this:
void fun(int a[][n])
The code doesn't work as expected but when defined as:
void fun(int a[][100])
Works perfectly.
I have no idea why this is happening, any insight will be very helpful.5 -
I really thought i would never run into integer overflow issues, but damn, not being able to set a date as 100 years into the future for comparison is pretty shite. Fuck this bug.2
-
Apparently work in progress submissions of our assignments were graded by the percentage of their completion.
So yeah... there was no way of getting 100% unless you had the assignemt compete. Spoler alert! Nobody got 100%... even if all the assignment criteria were met.
And the best thing is that he got the percentages by asking each student after their presentation...
Now I get why he was boasting so much, that only few of his students get A. -
I'm the only who occasionally swims like exactly 32, 64 or 128 lanes when doing sports? Or doing something like 64 rounds instead of 50 or 128 instead of 100?1
-
Me 3 weeks ago: I need the changes to make so I can add them to the code.
Hours before the change is scheduled, I receive a list of 100 changes to make.1 -
I WFH 100 percent of the time. I've been doing do for over a decade. The number of times I've had some disease while WFH is the same as it was when working on an office. There are so, so many other factors.2
-
I gotta write a quick mailing solution for an email discussion list, given a budget, so i'm like, ok, cool, let me check out sendgrid api, etc, whatever, right?
Wrong! 10000 members, with an email volume of about 100 messages per member, per day, meaning you're sending at least 100*1000 msgs/day ... or 3 million messages a month!
With most services you're looking at like $2,000 right there. My budget was $100.
So.... wtf. How would you use an api to host a discussion list... seems impractical?
I see no discussion about it, no service addresses it, nothing.
Email discussion list. Can someone point me in the right direction?5 -
We started planing for next month's. After this my time was already planned for 100%.
Now the Chef was coming we should document some processes. Now I'm planned for 110% for the next months.....
I like to be 110% xD1 -
When u are at page 8 of promotions of pc components, click on "see 100 products" and go to the first page 🤦
-
For the stress ball is that +100 on a single rant or overall? @dfox
& just for kicks I'll put the question in code form... well, kinda.
if( rantLikes >= 100 || overAllLikes >= 100)
{
Stressball.send( );
}2 -
What if I just make a website called the internet is nasty and let people either leave a comment with 100 characters and can shuffle through the comments to see how nasty the internet can be15
-
They intended to hold a press release for the 100 people who were saved by the corona virus shutdown. During the release they were to formally thank the world.
Unfortunately, before the press release could commence all 100 were killed by the common flu.1 -
I'm at the moment..... after a 100 commits in one single pull request, days of torturous effort and grappling with a stupid bloated piece of crap software, when, I realise, I COULD HAVE JUST TOLD THE CLIENT TO BUZZ OFF!!!
-
*attempts to leverage browser caching to raise site speed
*Site speed suddenly jumps to 100
*Very happy for 2 seconds
*Realise it's because I've knocked the site over
*Shit1 -
People talking about getting 100 +1's when I haven't even broken the 50 +1's barrier lol everyone should be having fun here, don't worry guys, stress balls will come 😊
-
Level of anxiety = ((Size of the programming project code)^2) * (100 - Percentage of the tested code in project)2
-
Apparently the standard "pack" of applicants for a job is at least 100 people, how else can you only be in the top "2%"? If there's only 2 applicants, your fingers (typing skills?) are in the top 2%, and the rest is in the upper 48.
All of that just to say it would have been better worded as 2 in 100 people than 2% =).
https://grammarly.com/blog/...
2 -
When your project manager/tester keeps changing different fields required, which is being handled 100% with JQuery....requiring you to rewrite the entire functions logic
This has now happened 4 times... -
If the same data is being fit over and over again to a neural net shouldn't it start spitting out the result it was trained to very quickly if over svereal frames its training for 100 epochs each ?8
-
When you change three lines in a PR with 100 changes that breaks the whole functionality, and it starts working flawlessly 😕 seems like testing PR before merge could have solved the doomsday
-
When some knob head at work convinces himself and the team that 100 projects in one solution is a good idea.2
-
About to get dicked on by finals tomorrow. I am 100 percent not ready for this. Thinking about bribing the teachers...1
-
@dfox & @trogus
Since there are less people around can we lower the requirements for the free stress ball back to 100++?
I know I can just buy one but earning one is so much better 😁4 -
another fail. this time during uni diploma defense. i'm the most unlucky person i swear. i didn't speak very confidently and got 93/100. those who were confident, got 100... #3002
-
Back from a 2 week holiday, inbox says 100+ messages
What is your back 2 work routine to get the current project status?1 -
https://upwork.com/jobs/...
Need exact copy of already fucked up website done in Wordpress because the Drupal one wasn't maintained. Will gladly pay $100.1 -
I never got 100 +1 ... and now that has risen to 150 I see that I never take away the stress that I have hahaha. so I had to make my own stress ball, but painted is not the same😔
-
I'm writing this rant because I've read all the recent rants here. As well as the top +-100 Algo rants.
So for the ones with the same craving for rants, here's mine. -
Me: Let's try the ballmer peak
One Beer
Other Beers
One Cuba Libre
Two Cuba Libres
Me: I think I'm ready let me take the test
Result: 93/100
mmm Interesting, let me try more. -
Benner Cycle Predicts 100+ Years of Market Movement
Link: https://silviodeda.com/how-the-benn...
Do you think so?1 -
I have never been able to find the perfect rollerball mouse. My Kensington is almost perfect but the click buttons don't work 100% of the time. Suggestions?
1 -
Why doesn't height:100% of an element follow the height of its parent that has a max-height value set? Width works just fine.
A minor annoyance, but an annoyance anyhow.2 -
Anyone know how to fix this efficiently? I'm calculating Realized gains but the output is ~ $120.
Because it's using the avg cost as the sales price of each share.
However what it should do sell the shares using FIFO.
But I can't think of how to efficiently track the purchase prices to use without replaying all the trades and tracking every single share that is bought and sold.
Like:
B1 100
S1 50
B2 100
B3 40
S2 70 (50 B1 20 B2)
2
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