Close relative: Hey, what is my gmail password?
Me: I have no idea.
Him: but you created the gmail account for me a couple years ago.
Me: Yeah, I helped you to create it and I warned you to remember your password.
Him: didn’t you write it down somewhere?
Me: no, I didn’t, you fucking useless piece of shit. I am not your fucking password manager.

Yes, it's in a basement, but I'm close to my servers 😅

!Rant
Thought this was kind of funny for us lady devs/programmers, and something we can relate to.

The lady in the image is an engineer/programmer and is getting married but doesn't have any girlfriends (since she works in a mostly male oriented field, like us). So instead of having female bridesmaids she had her close brogrammers / college classmates stand up in her wedding with her. I mean, it was probably less drama, anyways! 😂

I'm the only girl on my team so I def relate!

*not my pic*

Boss: Can we add a [Close] button at the top right of the modal instead for all the items, the back at the lower left seems out of place.

Me: What modal? You mean move the back button to the top right of the page?

Boss: And make it say [Close]

Me: But it navigates Back. It's not a modal so it doesn't close. [Back] makes more sense than [Close].

Boss: Ok
...
Boss: Change the [Back] on the modal to [Close].

Me: But... fine...

Buttons all now say "Close", they all have double quotes. No one has said anything.

Me: Sitting in beanbag chair in development office, using closed macbook as a plate for a large walnut-brie-honey-rucola sandwich, honey dripping all over the aluminium top.

New manager (well, he's pretty old, but newly hired): "I don't think you're allowed to eat near the computers"

Me: "And I don't think you're allowed in my dev cave".

*Put macbook to the side*
*push him out of the office*
*close sliding door*
*close blinds*
*sit in beanbag chair*
*eat sandwich*
*lick honey from macbook*

I'm sorry, coworkers. Two weeks of writing MySQL queries made me a bit feral.

As usual, I woke up at 6, got ready and did all my usual stuff.

Then at 6:15 I was beautifying my Python script because the code was unattractive.

I swear it took 5 minutes! No more than five minutes, but when I checked the time it was 7:10! Why must this happen all the time?

It's just like when I'm sleeping. I'll wake up, close my eyes for two seconds, and then it's magically been an hour.

Mum: Tom time to do something get off your computer
Me: *continues staring at computer*
Mum: Tom?
Me: ...
Mum: TOM
Me: Whaaa? *moves head slightly up but still doesn't take eyes off computer"
Mum: Please get off your computer there's stuff you've gotta do
Me: *finally looking up* OK just let me fix this one thing I'm so close
Mum: fine, 5 mins
*5 mins later:
Mum: come on Tom time to get off
Me: uuuggghhhhhhhh I'm nearly done please
Mum: hurry up
Me: *tries to hurry and finish as to not upset her* please I'm so close
Mum: *furious glance*
Me: *furiouser typing noises and frantic clicking*
Me: *finishes, attempts to run the program*
Program: *runs just fine and problem I was trying to fix was working great*

...

...

*something else breaks*
Me: ok mum please just this one thing
Mum: OFF

This is just my token of appreciation for the Skype devs. Can't begin to say how much I hate it. Your android app is a joke even after a host of updates, your desktop client is an even bigger joke (atleast Linux Beta version, I know betas aren't supposed to be stable but this is ridiculous).

You have reinvented chat clients to be extremely bulky, cumbersome and very hard to sync across devices. And you have managed to make it "buffer" more than a YouTube video does on a 2G network. I for one, am blown over by how you did that. And to top it all, you can't close the client on Linux atleast! All you did is just override the close button so that it only minimises it. Brilliant piece of work right there!

Why the hell can't you just close the client and run it in the background the proper way like everyone else does? Why does it have to take 20 *** seconds to open a message? The only reason I am stuck with this is some wierdos in the office still only use this. Get your shit together 😡

Ahh.. I feel much better now.

Made this for my mom for one of her projects.
May not be 100% accurate, but I was lazy so that means it's close enough. 😋

Dear Chrome,

I know it's ridiculous to have 50+ tabs open, but please - pretty please - just make it work for me. 300 MB/tab is starting to make Windows mad.

No, I will not close them. I might need that page I opened 4 months ago and was too lazy to bookmark.

Your abusive friend,

-chappjc

You can't buy happiness
But you can learn to code,
and that's pretty close

I just found my favorite editor in the shelves for cleaning products and couldn't help but buy it 🙃 but I'm afraid that when I open it, I might not be able to ever close it again...

So I'm doing my thing... Suddenly all open windows start closing one by one and computer starts a shut down.. and i realize the windows update is coming..

But like.. can you at least give me a 2 minutes heads up? How the fuck such a process gets approved in microsoft?

"Yeah just close everything and force restart.. it's fine"

Non dev related but: release my first track 😊

I'd love to create something which is near musical perfection for myself 😃

There's a couple of tracks which come close for me but not 99 percent yet.

fujioaskl;f;asdfjkl
WHY THE FUCK DOES MY BOSS HAVE ME MOCKING FUCKING RECAPTCHA API RESPONSES? IT'S SO FUCKING STUPID

I CAN'T MOCK THE RECAPTCHA JS METHODS SO I HAVE TO MAKE VALID-LOOKING JSON RESPONSES AND I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING CLUE HOW ANY OF IT FUCKING WORKS

THIS IS THE STUPIDEST THING ANYONE HAS EVER ASKED OF ME (okay, it isn't, but it's pretty damned close.) AND IT'S DURING MY BLOODY PERFORMANCE REVIEW.

I send a PR to your GitHub repo.
You close it without a word.

I tell you that your lib crashes because you're trying to parse JavaScript with a (bad) regex, but you keep insisting that no, there exist no problem, and even if you barely know what "parsing" means, you keep denying in front of the evidence.

Well fuck you and your shitty project. I'll keep using my fucking fork.

And if you're reading this, well, fuck you twice. Moron.

Not even algo this time. Probably not what the ranter meant by change log, but close enough

When u want to close a tab(cmd +w) but pressed cmd + Q

Visual Studio wasn't responding and I wanted to close it via task manager ... But as I clicked the button "close task" task manager wasn't responding😭

_An engineer was removing the engine parts from a motorcycle._

_Suddenly he saw a famous heart surgeon in his shop. He went to him & said.. "Look at this engine... I opened its heart, took the valves out, repaired and put them back"...So why do I get such a small salary? and u get huge sums_....!

_The doctor smiled at the engineer and came close to his ear and said.... "Try the same when the engine is running_."

👌👏 *Classic!*

_Continuation

.
_The engineer smiled back came close to doctors ear and said_
_I can pick any dead engine and make it alive . . . . . . . can you_ ???

👌👏 *Not only Classic but Epic*_ 😂😂👍

I got my very first dev job! After first making it to an interview where I didn't think I did all too well, I got a boost when on the 22nd December they called me asking for a referral. I gave them one but the person could not be contacted before the 23rd - close to xmas.

After an agonizing wait over the xmas period I finally got the call today. One hell of a way to start the new year!

I got a summer job (full time student) doing actual coding! I am so pumped!!!

Am I the only one who hates in app browsers? I fucking hate them. If I want to look at something later, I like to click the link, then close chrome. I'll have the tab to return to it later. But these shitty in app browsers that you can't turn off makes that a pain in the ass.

What the hell @Apple
I know autocorrect / suggestions is getting worse every day but this doesn’t even remotely come close ☠️

Shitty call
Me: what do you want?

Q: I Lost my iphone

Me: (already pissed) ok,do you have an icloud account?

Q: Yes, but i forgot the password.

Me: what!?!, ok, fine, we will reset it, which is your ID?

Q: I lost it too.

*stay calm* *stay calm*

Me: I can't help you go to an apple store and ask there. *I Close the call*

*Add that number to blacklist*

Not a rant about anything in particular. Just a summary of some feelings stored in the hateful part of my heart.

Developing for Android: Add this third-party library to your Gradle build. Use (this) built-in Android class to make the thing work.

*Clicks link

Deprecated since API version SUCKMYDICK-7. Use (this) instead

*Clicks link

Deprecated since API version LICKMYBALLS-32. Use...

Developing for Windows: Please use (this) API call. It was literally already available before Bill Gates was born. Carbon dating has placed this item to older than the universe itself and it is likely the entry point for the big bang. It is also still the best way to accomplish (task).

Developing for Linux: "Hmm, I wonder how to use this"

> > > Some shitty mailing list in small blue monospace font tells you to reference a man page that is three versions behind but the only version available.

What? Those three sentences didn't explain it enough? Well, maybe you aren't cut out for this type of thing.

JavaScript: you know how it is.

SQL: You expect a decent-quality answer from stack overflow but you always get an outdated and hacky response and it's using syntax from Microsoft SQL. You need MySQL.

C#: A surprising number of Microsoft forum results ranking high on Google. You click on one in hopes that it will be of any sort of quality. You quickly close the tab and wonder why you ever even had hope.

Literally any REST API: Is it "query" or "q"? "UserID" or "user_id"? Oh, fuck, where's the docs again?

You thought you escaped JavaScript, but it was a trick!: Some bullshit library you downloaded to make your other library work redefined one of the global variables in the project you inherited. Now you get 347 "<x> is not a function" errors in your console. Good luck, asshole.

FontAwesome/ Material fonts/ Any icon font pack: You search "Close" for a close button icon. No results. You search "Simplified railroad crossing sign without the railroad". You get a close icon.

I think that's all of my pent up rage. Each of them were too small for an individual rant so I had to do this essay.

Riverbed...the software cost USD $120,000+ and their support was horrible.

Tickets would go unanswered.

Their documentation was pretty good but there were parts that were wrong and they would not fix it.

They would usually close an issue because it was opened by someone else 5 years prior and hadn't been fixed.

The several years I used it their releases consisted of no tangible code enhancements.

Several times we provided very simple reproducable issues and there response was basicly "just don't do that".

Some of the dinosaurs maintaining legacy systems are rather well meaning, but somewhat frustratingly don't seem to have updated their knowledge of what counts as "a lot of storage space" beyond the early 90's. Just asked one of them if they could dump all the legacy logs to AWS each day so we could keep them for 6 months or so (they're rolled over weekly otherwise.)

"Well I mean we can, but are you sure? *All* the logs? You could end up storing close to 100MB of logs a month! Won't that be prohibitively expensive?!"

It's rather cute really.

I never thought a browser will come close to Chrome. But wow, Vivaldi is AWESOME. It's really fast and the tab organization is just amazing.

I just MS doesn't buy it soon :|

Does anyone know what program people use to create those beautiful code snippets? I can't find an example, but it looks quite close to this, just with more vibrant colors.

"Lightweight rant"

Good job, devs of Sparkasse.
Time to "jobn't" y'all.
That error message is very informational.

I know it is because of the time counter being at 0 and I need to relogin to reset it, but what if I was a regular dumb client? To add more salt into it, what if I was someone in his 90s.

Do your fucking job properly.

Edit: The error message translates to "Error", "Error" and "Close"

Fucking Windows... If you don't have enough memory for everything youre supposed to do, then kill whatever you want, but not the fucking graphics driver.

What should I do then? Close something different? Fuckin Monkeys.

So I had a very long team viewer session with my colleague and after 3 hours we were finished and I went straight to pornhub after the session. But the problem was that I forget to close the team viewer session and 30 minutes later I saw him disconnect. FML, I’ll see him tomorrow

Hi hackers!
Just not sure about this one:
Is this true?
The closer i get to the router , the more packets i might be able to sniff.
And something else:
I might loose the traffic sent to the other APs while i'm close to one another.

Is there any way to capter all packets?
(I also have wired access to network but since the socket isolates the traffic let me know if there is any other method)

Thanks

So our university website was recently refurbished with new design. But fucking hell it's bad. Not only the whole website is full of bugs, the design choices are extremely poor.

Sometimes, when I open a course page, it opens a modal with undefined as it's title. And I have to click close button ten times to close the modal.

I can't even blame university. The guy was a former student and Uni probably trusted him. What a retard!

When it keeps happening every time but you're too lazy to fix it because you always remember it at 7am when you want to close the computer and go get some sleep...

Ugh...

Oh my fucking god. It's 1:30 PM and I literally cannot sleep right now. It's like I lost the ability to close my eyes and go to sleep.

What could be the cause of this?

*Flashbacks to earlier today*
Brother: Hey, want a piece of this FUCKING HUGE Toblerone bar?
Me: Sure why not

But seriously, I need sleep

Okay, windows, it's cool that you're getting a dark themed explorer and overall UWP-Fluent Design improvements but...

What's up with this context menu, which has a button saying "close [context] menu"?

(this is made up of screenshots, not a recording - the actual animation is much smoother)

People that post shit like "if you believe/support x, then unfollow me" are some extremely conceited and childish morons.

For starters, surrounding yourself with only people who think just like you will make you extremely close minded, which is ironic as fuck because in my experience these people believe x and bitch at y for being close minded whenever they're just as guilty as y.

Secondly is your head that far up your own ass that you can't accept that people aren't gonna be like a flock of sheep and all believe one thing? That's the great thing about us: we're given the opportunity to have our own opinion but these retards don't like whenever people exercise that right. It's tragic how retarded some people actually are.

The minister of human resources is a fucking idiot. Nobody including ministry employees knows exactly what will the rules be 6 hours ahead, but they take effect immediately and failure to abide is punishable. Yesterday the HR minister said that if public schools close down, everyone will have to repeat this year. In response to this and a few other questionable decisions on behalf of schools across the country, today the government banned anyone from closing down public schools including headmasters, public health services, the police and the ministry of human resources.

Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 1)

ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts

I've pretty much completed my profile here on devrant... I'm just 3000 or so away from my final item

I don't even know what it is exactly.

Dear developers who create an electron based app... Yes it's easy to make custom titlebars but please... Please please please give us the option to use the system default title bars... Looking at you itch!

(Also stop assuming everyone uses windows and use the minimise > maximise > close to the right of the window, not everyone does)

Fuck, I'm too tired to rant about shit. Life is really starting to go better and I just...don't know what to rant about, so I've been quiet for the past couple months.

Uhhhhh, whenever I close my laptop the screen stays on and seeps through but I'm too lazy to actually mess with it to make it turn off when I close it?

I've been hanging out with my best friend again lately and she's the best fucking person ever?

OH WAIT, I'M BROKE, THERE'S SOMETHING (I've spent like 10 minutes typing, just trying to think of shit to say)! But I'm just bad with managing money and I get paid on Saturday anyways..

Guys. I don't know what to even rant about anymore. Life is finally going good enough that I don't feel the need to rant all the time.

!Rant

> Go to co-workers working machine
> install tmux and mps-youtube
> play very subtle sounds from console
> close console but keep session running with tmux
> watch coworker go insane because he can't detect the sound source

How to make your coworker go insane in 5 easy Steps

Management: Create [totally idiotic and complicated feature, near to impossible to create]
Me: that's close to impossible and could probably destroy some other parts of the application.
Management: well, then your application is poorly programmed.

DAFUQ? HOW DARE TO JUDGE THE QUALITY OF MY CODE WITHOUT EVEN ABLE TO READ 2 LINES OF CSS? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS THIS?

I'm really not easily offended but this sentence hit really hard.

My last day before vacation, Friday after hours,
Me as a Junior dev, not that experienced with bash.
An unfortunately with root on a prod machine.
I wrote a script and wanted it to stop at a specific point, but couldn’t remember which of those cmd it was so I wrote all of them.
Quit
Close
Stop
Halt
Exit

Ran the script.
Wanted to kill myself.
I haven’t had the privs to turn on the VM again.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
🤦🏽‍♂️
I definitely learned a lot!

My current project. Won't reveal anything about it until I've got a usable version (which might take more than a month) but it would be a good way to give a middle finger to a big ass surveillance company.

It won't exactly match with their product since this is impossible for me to do as this would compromise user privacy but it'll come close enough!

Idk if this has been posted before, but it hits way to close to home...

I just pressed CTRL + W to close a rant, but I was reading on my phone so I closed a browser tab on my computer instead.

Flexible working hours, Home Office, fair compensation, working on a greenfield product 🥰.

I was in a bad spot two years ago jobwise and I don't regret jumping the ship for a second.

I would never have guessed that flexible hours and WFH would be so beneficial to my mental health!

Not everything is perfect all the time, but it gets pretty damn close all things considered.

I know:
-Python
-Web Development
-JavaScript
-Node.JS
-Electron
-Linux

-- In all of this, I know lots but not nearly close to everything

Am I employable?
I don't feel like I know enough.

The website of the italian post service is "closed" between 23:45 and 00:15, everyday.
I don't know if something like this happens in other countries...

And do you know when I really need to access it?
ALWAYS IN THESE 30 MINUTES, not the others 1.410 of the day!

P.S.
What do you think, what could be a valid reason to "close" a web service?
I thought about backup, but other services don't have this problem.

My head hurts so much right now...

So there's a beautiful hilarious woman next door and we're getting really close (friend close), but she's 26 and she's just messing with my head so much, wtf is going off???

My company’s upper leadership is sooo focused on the NUMBER of defects that are open on our project and only the number. We give each defect a priority of P0, P1, or P2. You would think this would help prioritize and strategize our plan to fix them. But nope. Every week we have some arbitrary “goal” to hit. A number purely made up by clueless leadership as to what makes a “quality” product.

On Friday’s, managers start harassing devs to merge their fixes and for QA to close out defects. So effectively rushing to hit that arbitrary number or else we’ll have to work Saturday.

Meanwhile they want more test automation coverage to reduce the incoming defect rate. But when the fuck do we have time to develop said tests when all you want is the defect closed to bring down your precious little number?!

They’d rather us close 25 P2 defects to bring the number down rather than 10 P0 or P1 defects. These leaders are so incompetent it kills me! Without any back story, they’re ultimately the reason we’re in this position in the first place! Argghhh!

"Hey Google define *word*"

>>*Definition of word*

"Hey Google define *struggle to pronounce word while sounding like I have tourette's or I'm having a stroke; get no where close to the accurate pronunciation*"

>>*Gives definition of the word I'm trying to say*

This asshat can understand me stroking out while failing miserably to pronounce a word, but when my southern accent kicks in and fucks with the pronunciation of some words, this thing can't take it? Fucking hell bruh.

Working as a software engineer but: co-workers randomly walk into my office to ask me <<insert random IT problem (i.e. mouse not working etc.)>> while I'm deeply focused programming. Trying to close my office door results in co-workers backbiting...

Why can't they just go to the IT administrator who's work it is to handle their fucking problems?

The best comment I ever read in the production...

/*
* You may think you know what the following code does.
* But you dont. Trust me.
* Fiddle with it, and youll spend many a sleepless
* night cursing the moment you thought youd be clever
* enough to "optimize" the code below.
* Now close this file and go play with something else.
*/

devRant is nice.
If you move rant feed to "Recent" and saw a bunch of rant u already read but you keep scrolling down hoping to see new rant but u fail cause rant policy keep people from posting new rant for 2 hour and not many new rant has been post.
This is a nice feature. It make u self aware that "crap, maybe too much time on devRant". Even if you addict to devRant but by this policy -> It force you to really close its app and checking it on another free time. (more healthy than another social media I guess 😂)

I question myself sometimes.

I clicked on not one, but BOTH information bubbles, and proceeded to close them immediately.

WhatsApp and Telegram should consider a feature to disable voice messages from all contacts or all contacts but close friends.

I'm getting tired of getting tech support requests from acquaintances I haven't hung out with in years but when these are too lazy even to type and I have to take type and listen to their muttered voice notes I get crazy

Public service announcement: Wearing club de nuit perfume will have random people get close to you and smell the perfume thus complimenting it but making it really uncomfortable.

My brother in law gifted me this awesome perfume and it has brough upon some very serious awkward encounters.

I know it smells good, and I know I am pretty, but please ma'am I am married and this is weird, get away and ask me. Seriously no one every talks about how dudes get put into weird positions sometimes and I don't like females getting close to me.

I wear the perfume because I like the smell, and I get it, but please leave me alone.

Was looking through some repositories and found this in a 2y old PR, the only PR there is and ever was in the repo..

Ends with:
> Best wishes for the Wednesday launch.
> Steve

Steve never got an answer (on the PR at least) .. but the README links to his fork now (and no other changes have been done) .. why not just accept the PR or at least close it..

Two days ago I was so close to being single again. Reason? I was in the zone when my fiancée called, the ring of the phone jarred me so much that I contemplated smashing the phone at the wall. I didn't but just turned it off. I guess she must have called a couple more times because when we finally spoke she was so angry that she threatened to get her stuff from my place. Luckily I later got back in the zone, and luckier still, I have a girlfriend.

My friend who works in marketing told me the other day that he would like enter IT world to earn more. I have told him that company had opened position for junior SEO/SEM which in theory is very close to what he is doing right now. His base salary would double and there are bonuses and commissions. I have told him that I could get him that job, but what I heard back? "Nah I don't to want to do that" and started whining again about his salary...

Day 653

I still didn't manage to close vim but I dont wan't to close my terminal.
Guess I'll accept my new buddy on my screen. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I opened an issue on a repo telling the owner that placing a "test passing" badge on the readme but not having other tests than an "ExampleTest" and no tests of the actual functionality is bad practice and what he thinks about updating the readme.

The result was a deletion (not close) of the issue and a ban from contributing (issues, PRs) on any of his projects.

And it was not some small "ten persons use this" project but a large boilerplate project with 2.4k github stars and over 800 forks. You would expect a little bit more professionalism of someone with that popularity.

Layoffs happen all the time. But when you survive it and come back the next day and see the empty cubicles occupied by very senior devs who were really close to you and mentored you.

Had to go through this twice, 2014 and 2016. Thankfully we still meet up at Hooters every Friday and rant, and that's our version of a 'weekly'

a random talk with a group of friends (back in the 90s)

A very close friend: How can I print a document horizontally? I tried to put the sheet well, but it wrinkles.

To this day, all my friends and I laugh every time we remember that

i'm writing a custom web server for a project (esp32 based)

each 4 connections system crashes (cannot bind socket anymore)

i was so angry with espressif thinking that was their fault (bad implementation of posix sockets)
but is mine...

today i did another code review and I just discovered that i missed a fucking close() in the websockets handler
fuck
fuck
i wasted a month on this issue.

!dev but since dev can still give you headaches:

‪Ibuprofen is damn close to magical. I fully understand the chemical mechanism by which it works, and it still don’t make sense how that shit can make you a new person in 45 minutes.‬

Mfw you try out Atom and it crashes the moment you open anything even slightly big. Then you try to close it out and reopen it but it decides it should start off right where you left it-suspended in time... doing absolutely nothing.

On another note, it looks beautiful, has many extensions, and is highly customizable but it gets bogged down so quickly.

I don't understand how is possible that programmers today are developing applications that are storing plain password in the database.

I know it's kinda boring topic since everybody here is talking about it this week, but it's really confusing to me.

Every now and then some DB gets hacked, millions of passwords are leaked and then you have developers, who should be smart and logical people, who decide to do that.

Ok, maybe the project deadline was close or something similar, but I think there is no excuse for something like that. No matter how close or behind deadline project is, you should always be able to explain to your boss/client what could happen.

What kind of a fucked up company that has a 9 interview process in a 3 month period and sends the rejection email without a single line of feedback?

They are a fucking startup, not Google! Not even close to a company like Google!!

It's my mistake that I put up with their shit from the beginning but I didn't know any better.

When all your automated test results come back good... But you just know, deep down, somewhere there's a plate of shit sitting too close to a fan.... waiting!

I really do like Flutter/Dart but I just cannot be the only who thinks that the way to create several nested components/widgets is even close to somewhat readable, what the fu** Google.

I think I might get close to a burnout. Last week was extremely stressful because of a deadline and I worked 45 hours in 4 days. Even in the evening my heart is pounding like a coke addict who had his last nose 1 hour ago.

What is your personal way of dealing with (work related) stress?
What activities help you best to cool down and relax?

I've not yet tried meditation but am trying to take some time to regularly do sport after the work, hopefully it helps.

Laravel payment gateway
Ep 2 (part 2)

ps: all chats are dummy of the original of conversation and a little bit exaggerated but they are close to the original facts

So @Linux gave me a website to check which happens to have a tutorial on how to close ssh session after x inactive minutes, and now every time I'm back to the terminal I find my self out T_T

but it is a good life savior if I forgot my session on work computer lol

New manager was hired in another department but he sits close to me.

After a couple of weeks he complimented how it always seemed like I was there at work.

I just said thanks. But what I wanted to say was...

"Yeah no kidding fucktard, you get here after 8am, leave before 3pm, and you some how are impressed that not only does my normal 8 hour shift completely overlap the time you are here, but I also regularly put in 9 hour days which is pretty normal for people around here.”

Very random, I’d normally post this on twitter but my girlfriend is there and it’s about her. A bit long and very personal...

to;dr My girlfriend and soon to be fiancé officially who is certain we are going to marry, doesn’t want to invite people to our wedding anymore because she doesn’t have close friends like I do and I’m quite disappointed.

My girlfriend and I have been planning to get married for a while now at least 18 months. I haven’t asked her to marry me yet officially but I know she’ll say yes because we’ve discussed it. We’ve spoken about a small wedding with a few friends not much family but the more we spoke about it the more she’s reduced how many people we should invite. Today she basically said she doesn’t want to invite anyone because she doesn’t have any friends she’s that close to or trusts like that.
By comparison I have about 5 best friends I can count on any day of the week and at least 5 other friends I’d want to be there. We’re both introverts but I’m close to some of these guys because we have similar mental illnesses and trauma from our youth and we gravitated to each other like magic. She kinda gets jealous of that sometimes or sad that she isn’t close to anyone like that besides me. But not like a toxic jealousy or anything. I’m pretty disappointed that at this point it really may just be us at our wedding.
I’m a romantic and the day will be great regardless, after all it’s her I’m marrying not them. On the flip side I’ve always seen my wedding day as something I’d get to share with my close friends I wanted to get married in the past in fact this would be the second time I’d propose to someone. She’s the one that made me feel like I’d marry again after the first engagement went terribly.
I’m disappointed and if I bring it up too much it’s just gonna make her feel awkward and cave for me but I don’t want that. Gonna marry her regardless though.

I want to code again, but now LaTeX is my life. Close enough I hope?

You guys ever get "Project Zoned"?

When you've been consulting with a client for the past few weeks and then in the end they say "I've decided I'm not going to move forward because it's better for me, blah blah blah. But if I did you'd be the person to do it."

But you spent all that time trying to close the project that seemed so attainable at the time, thinking about the money you could be making. Then you get hit with that shit stick.

God.

Senior Developer is a title that you get from working at the same company for over 5 years but you don't learn anything new within those 5 years.

Close your damn divs!!!

So, a close relative of me is a local politician in my hometown.
I managed his political website for a while but then I completely left it in the hand to who deal whit is PR.

Today he emailed me to update only the header photo. No big deal.

After a bit of scrambling I find what I used when I made that.

FML I hate me of the past

That happiness after you are so close to open the closest window and throw the pc, but you manage to fix the problem.

FUCK YOU GRUB I WON!!!!!!!!!!!! SUCK IT!

Basically any meeting where "the big bald" (a.k.a our manager) was present...
It always started professional and alright but it often took only around 5 minutes before the asshat started bragging about "his past accomplishments", his life when he was younger and often a lot of shit that wasn't exactly respectful to women...

I'm not an SJW, nor am I the most "female-friendly" person out there myself...
But the things he said repeatedly, made me come really close just punching him in the face.

Just spent over 5 hours trying to figure out Microsoft’s OneDrive REST api. Basically my first time trying to do POSTs n’ stuff. I got very very close, but the server kept throwing 400 error codes. Eventually I had to give up and ask Stack Overflow. Going to bed now at 2:20am. No worse feeling then not being able to solve a problem you’re dedicated on solving. :/

Aaaaaw fuck yea. I'm finally at my mother's, for my first holidays since late December 2017, and I FINALLY can sleep as much as I want without being bothered. I just slept 30+ hours in 3 days, which is close to what I sleep in a week. Still tired though, but I feel so much more relaxed than the evening I arrived at my mom's place 3 days ago *.*

Kiki’s Autistic Stories!

Living with synaesthesia is very interesting. To me, drinks, especially homogenous and complex ones like espresso or vine, make sound I can describe. This is a system, this is not random. People are agreeing with me. Colours have taste.

But I fear just one thing. There is a certain colour, especially when it’s a glass of that colour, that “tastes” so fucking bitter sweet that it gives me migraine. When I see it, I have to immediately close my eyes, go away, do something to forget it, otherwise migraine. Somehow, thinking of it is unpleasant, but thinking alone doesn’t induce a migraine.

Oh my FUCKING GOD i HATE VISUAL STUDIO CODE, I just wanted to FUCKING OPEN A C++ CLASS IN VISUAL STUDIO 2019 FROM UNREAL ENGINE but for some FUCKING REASON my SCRIPT EDITOR WAS SET TO FUCKING VS CODE, and now 80% of my FUCKING CPU is being FUCKING USED AND I CAN'T FUCKING CLOSE IT AND ITS FUCKING FROZEN SO I CAN'T EVEN EDIT THE CLASS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA anyways thankyou for coming to my ted-talk

!dev

This has been an eventful week I guess. Not a happy week, however.

A friend of mine passed last Thursday. We weren't too close, but we were still friends, and he was very close to a couple other friends of mine. He'd always had health issues, but he was only 19. He hadn't been out of high school for a full year.

Then I just found out today that another friend of mine got arrested for shooting and killing someone this past weekend. I don't know many details about what happened, mutual friends are saying it was self-defense. He's never seemed like the kind of person that would just murder someone, but shit happens.

As a programmer, this is painfully unsatisfying. Just make it 2048 and everyone would be happy.

Today at 'Derp & Co' is the end of the last sprint, no one have close all the task asigned. Myself included.

- that sucks...

Because there are task from previos sprints still in TODO that block other tasks.

- oof

But there is more... Yesterday was the deadline of the project. From today and onwards the client get discount.

- oof (but fair to the client)

Management have in mind AT LEAST 4 more weeks of development.

- But... how... wtf?

In 2 weeks part of the hardware we need for the project will return to the client.

- <smash the door and leave>

Management still is asking if we can do it on time...

- yeah... just call the Doctor, we need a TARDIS ASAP

Loving this platform and I'm very close to being convinced of getting the sexy black theme, but only when my stickers arrive, living in India.

When can I expect them on my bae(XPS 15), since I sent the mail about 3 days ago.. CANT WAITTTYYYY

Have been working on my project recently, bug fixing, aws configuring, containing the app, etc, etc. I've been sleeping close to 5hrs on average per day, juggling college finals, work, training and project labour, my activity here has been minimal but I figured some people might be going through the same and I wanted to share my last resource dev weapon...the jet fuel of dev fuels imo...DW coffee

I strongly recommend to use it in dire times (not a promo this thing got me through 13 hours of coding straight)

I am torn apart for several months now. My boss and coworkers are amazing people, projects are quite fun and interesting, workplace is close to home and they pay for my exams (step by step reaching for MCSD certification), but...
The salary if fcking low (you could probably earn same ammount while working as a waitress of normal restaurant). Not only for me of course, but still :( Now I am thinking of running to some bank and doing boring programming job coding same tasks again and again, but getting payed very well

They all think I'm a hacker.

My parents have no clue about what I do.

My wife is starting to understand (at least she knows I make web pages 90% of the time I'm working), but still doesn't get close to see the full picture.

Btw, they are all very supportive and I love them for that :-)

There's a side project that I wanted to finish for some time now:

I built a pipboy (from Fallout 3) for a close friend - 3D printed and colored the parts, made a preliminary setup.
But to this day, it's still missing a power supply and all the proper wiring. (Jumper cables ARE not.)
Apart from that, I probably want to replace the RPi in there for a slimmer version.
Development is all done, implementation needed.

Hey buddy pal mate, yeah, i get it, you a good frontend dude but if your page lags on my phone, im gonna just close it and never open it again, so dont you fucking use every possible overhead framework known to man.

That moment when you have 2 Chrome windows open, each having 100+ tabs. Walk through each of the tabs to close off as many as possible and make some room but you cannot, as all of them are required or will be required soon enough.

More masturbation with numbers.

If you take some product p,
and do

√p**(1/p)

and it's factors

a**(1/p)

and

b**(1/p)

you might find something interesting.

Take for example

a=21977
b=43331
p=a*b=952285387

(√p)**(1/p) = 1.0000000108551363

a**(1/p) = 1.0000000104986928
b**(1/p) = 1.0000000112115799

More often then not, a, b, or both, will share one or two of the most significant digits in the mantissa, as the root of p.

It doesn't always work, but it seems to be true more often than you might expect.

This is probably obvious in hindsight but I still think it's cool.

In some instances if you then do, say
sqrt(log(p, 1.000000010)), it comes pretty close to the original factors, but thats really hit or miss.

I hate all the hate, violence, and abuse in the world. I live somewhat close to one of the recent mass shootings and I’m fortunate to not have known anyone involved. But I wish we’d just stop trying to point fingers and actually do something about the mental health here. All the Racism, Sexism (on both sides), and mental health that goes unchecked genuinely makes me sad. And this bullshit with Walmart taking down any advertisements for “violent video games” but still selling guns is horse shit. Idc if you sell the guns but if you’re going to fuck over video games for nothing because they’re never the cause, then stop selling guns if you’re rolling off this bullshit logic.

I hope everyone is safe and doing okay.

How to fix issues the easy way:

1. Provide users a way to raise issues
2. Immediately respond to new issues saying you added them to the internal ticketing system
3. Wait till the affected product reaches EoL
4. Tell the customer you are sorry, but as the product is now after EoL, you cannot use any resources on fixing the issue
5. Close the issue

There are few developer who name their functions all wrong, but the functionality is fine. Then there comes those who name their functions right but the functionality is nothing close to what it says. There is this function I debugged. It's name is optimizeQuery. It does not optimize the query at all. Rather dismantles it. Also it made it's way to the production. 😅 Now I have to correct and optimize the optimizeQuery.

So apparently google doesn't give a fuck about your money. Yes I didn't use it right now, i purchased the dev account so I will be able to publish later when I need it and already used it in the past. How is it that they will close an account that you've payed for for inactivity?

ps.: Now I understand why has the play store full garbage apps. I will do that too...
pps: I know it's only 25$ but I still payed that to have access in the first place

Probably taking our tech directors mobile phone and putting in the ceiling. Kept ringing him from our desks and he couldn't work out where it had gone, but could hear the theme from Rocky, so knew it was close!

Firefox by far :)

At least as a program I start up my self.

I do use a fair number if other to but no other comes close.

I think I'm still under NDA.

But I wanted to share, that shit after 6 months figured out that the ONLY time I can breath is weekend.

And I'm telling this in a GOOD sens. It's one of the reports I get 1-2 times a week, but this one struck too much close to reality ':)

When project managers are panicking and you know you are really so close from done, a few fixes and everything will fall into place. But manager is on your neck because "nothing is working" now you must take time to be their psychologist instead of working on what is actually making them panic 🙃 development is a rough space. One bug can stand in front of working products just like that

I really wanna say, please fuck off for a few hours. Thanks bye.

So… I prefer nano over other terminal editors (Mainly because I don’t understand how to use others properly) and I wasn’t really aware of the VISUAL and EDITOR environment variables. So on my Arch machine most things would default to vi. Vi to me is like an annoying pop-up that really doesn’t want you to close it (Tho, one thing I did learn eventually was how to close it ). So at some point I quickly wanted to edit crontab as root and I just couldn't manage to get crontab to use nano. So what did I do?

sudo pacman -R vi

ln -s /usr/bin/nano /usr/bin/vi

I symlinked nano to vi and it finally worked. I know that there are probably countless ways this could’ve been done better but in that case I wouldn't have posted it here under wk81 ;)

Inspiring moment: when the control system I wrote for a robot stopped the thing's EDF mere inches from my nose when the bot went out of control (for other reasons) during testing. Had it not stopped I would probably be without a nose, that EDF (Electric Ducted Fan) had fairly sharp blades. Very scary, but very thrilling too.

Each time my code affects something in the real world, it feels so damn awesome. Thankfully I've not come close to losing my nose (or other body parts) after that incident, but that incident inspired me to continue work on failure-proof control systems that enforce safety.

Fuck LinkedIn
Fuck their closed API
Microsoft always steals your PRIVATE info, but is scared of us using their PUBLIC info
Fucking morons
I can just use selenium and still have all the info I need
Then why the fuck would you close API to approved only
Can't you just track the traffic????

I just spent 45 minutes trying to make my HP printer work in Arch Linux (actually Antergos, but close enough).

Finally had enough and booted into an Ubuntu MATE LiveUSB that I had... Which saw the printer, connected to it, and printed without needing to install anything extra.

I gotta say, while not a big Ubuntu fan, I'm certainly impressed it was stupidly simple!

I haven’t told anybody about this outside of my close friends and the dR discord, but I am getting another fumo. This one will be the Kaguya Houraisan fumo. (ᗜˬᗜ)

!rant

just a poll i'm looking for from all the linux based dev's

What distro would you recommend for a front end dev? Tried ubuntu but the wifi driver wasnt supported I guess in my dev machine. Currently looking at Elementary OS, but still undecided. I would primarily like it to be Debian based or something close as I'm very familiar with apt-get debain based stuff, and dont really feel like learning an entirely new distro at them moment.

Thanks all :D

PS. I have a Lenovo Ideapad 110
Specs include quad-core AMD A-8, 8gb ram, 1TB HDD, can give more if necessary

worst part of programming is knowing what needs to happen, having an idea of the logic that needs to run, but having absolutely no idea how to get that logic implemented.

Been staring at my screen for 30 minutes at this point starting to type a function, then deleting it realizing that method won't work, trying another one before deleting that one as well, over and over and over again

I'm about to just close this damn thing and play Minecraft for an hour, maybe a mindless Minecraft break will help.

!rant, but a feature request.

@dfox, whenever I use the comment box, it covers the whole screen. So, if I wanna tag somebody in my comment, I gotta close the comment box once, memorize their username since there's no autocomplete on @'s and then type back.

Either the comment box could be shortened, or autocomplete be added to user tag function, which could atleast detect the users commenting on the current thread (since programmers suck at memorising).

What say, DevRanters?

I get some error when deleting an azure service so I put a support ticket asking for help. Just as I am about to close my computer for the day I receive an email saying:

"Product team will disable the account xxxxx from backend".

The xxxxx is our subscription number. The subscription that hosts not only that service but also production servers and databases, storage accounts containing backups, etc.

I replied to the email so hopefully disaster is avoided otherwise tomorrow wont be a happy day.

Has anyone ever been so close to remembering a really old memory but can’t put your finger on it?

Friend: Hey I am rebasing my commits and got stuck into a weird window and i was not able to come out of it?
Me: It is vi LMAO. Just press `:wq`
Friend: Wait I'm pressing the same but still nothing happened, it is displaying on my screen?

... After 200 messages...
Me: Just close the computer and I am going to Himalayas. Peace

The graphic cards supply is completely madness. Even after the crypto crash it is not possible to buy RTX cards at price any close to MSRP.
But today my jaw drop when I saw auction on popular online portal where some guy was selling a place in a queue in another store. The title was "Rights to buy RTX 3080" and for 400$ you could potentially buy a GPU for the price close to MSRP. I think this was too much and after a few hour the advert was took down.

Worked my ass off for every single thing, gave everything I had, didn't care about my friends too in some situations
But...
When it came to making someone the head... It wasn't me it someone not even close to me..

First rant guys!

I'm a .net and PHP developer and love visual studio. I also hate windows 10 and it's stupid surprise reboots. Twice I switched to Linux mint but returned to windows because of the IDE. Been on VS (with PHP tools) for too long and nothing on Linux comes close to VS not to mention the lack of .net 4.6 (no mono) on Linux. M$ make Visual Studio 2015 cross platform!

I'm not one to shit on Windows, because I use it extensively in my daily life (Streaming, Gaming, Coding etc)

but I'm driven crazy by this fucking TEAMS app. It starts itself right after booting, doesn't want to close without me firing up Task manager and ending the process.

And in the "Startup" tab I've disabled it two times but it will just Enable it by itself. This is borderline criminal practice of writing software.

Are you saying I should just remove Teams?? Pfftt.. can't do that either. Joining a Teams link on the browser is so painful that it's better to just jam scissors into your eyeballs.

Fuck you, Microsoft. Sincerely.

Just realised one thing. Every single time I have IntelliJ IDEA or Android Studio opened, Chrome of Firefox are just, like really fast. But as soon as I close IntelliJ or Studio, the browsers are slow as hell.

That moment when PM writes "click on learn more" on the whiteboard, but the 'c' and 'l' are too close together and it seems like one letter 😂

After nearly 30 years developing, I've seen plenty of irrelevant job emails, but this one shows I can still be surprised! I'm struggling to think what in my profile could even come close to matching me for this role.

I have to show weekly progress on my 2D game engine this monday in order to be graded.. but I can't focus due to tooth of wisdom.

I'm THIS fucking close to using these:

I'd love to use something more user-friendly than Arch, but nothing comes close to Yaourt :(

The amount of highly sexual, disgusting jokes and shit that me and my employees say at the office behind close doors is the primary reason why I keep the door to my department offices closed.

I usually tell everyone that it is due to covid concerns, but it ain't, we really do be making the most disgusting jokes known to man.

Example:

Me: cum bucket!!!!
From outside the office, the CMS admin: "mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yess daddy??"

My office is not normal, my guys are polite, articulate and proper in any other meeting that we attend, but dear me I sometimes worry.

I wasn't hired to do a dev's job (handled sales) but they asked me to help the non-HQ end with sorting transaction records (a country's worth) for an audit.

Asked HQ if they could send the data they took so I wouldn't need to request the data. We get told sure, you can have it. Waits for a month. Nothing. Apparently, they've forgotten.

Asks for data again. They churn it out in 24 hours. Badly Parsed. Apparently they just put a mask of a UI and stored all fields as one entire string (with no separators). The horror!

Ended up wasting most of a week simply fixing the parsing by brute force since we had no time.

Good news(?): We ended up training the front desk people to ending their fields with semi-colons to force backend into a possibly parsed state.

Me: *Clicks red 'X'
macOS: "Do you want to close the window?" "Keep window open" "Close Window"
Me: *Clicks "Close Window"
macOS: "Are you sure you want to close the window? YOU MAY LOSE DATA!"
Me: "YES!! Close the goddamn window!"
macOS: "Window failed to close, click 'Close Window' or try again later."
Me: *Presses and holds power button to shut down.
*"Computer" restarts...
macOS: "You shut down your computer because of a problem. Would you like to close this window.
Me: *Clicks 'Close Window'
macOS: "Do you want to close the window?" "Keep window open" "Close Window"

Macintosh: It's like a computer... But not really... Well, maybe... NAAAAHHHH!!

So I'm wondering how I'm getting a date that, according to the settings should not be that one in that case, but is pretty fucking close (so much so that I first thought that was the correct one).
Then I realise it's because I'm hitting a case where I can't get all the necessary info so I literally made a method called GuessDate and it tries to guess the date based on available info and it did an amazing job, but it didn't have all the data so it's slightly off.
I both love and hate programming right now :)

tl;dr fuck me, I'm stupid, I suck at my job and I wanna die but can't complain because I'm labeled ungrateful

I am -this- close... -this- close to strangling someone, or myself for that matter, over trying to finish this goddamned website that I regret taking on just because I needed the money.

You make me rework my website design three times and eventually end up micro-managing me and keep on making me make small changes that even I can't figure out, nor can anyone else for that fucking matter because you want it to be 'perfect'. God I'm so irritated right now let me fucking sleep. I want out so bad but fuck me sideways with my gaping asshole I need the fucking money.

I wanna quit this shit so bad, it's making me hate myself and throwing me into an existential crisis whether or not am I even a good designer / developer because I just can't satisfy this perfectionist asshole and need to greet him with a smile every fucking time to maintain good terms between our startups.

I recently started learning Erlang. This is the story of how I got trapped into it.

When I code, I usually use my trusty text editor and a terminal to either compile my code or run tests in the language interpreter. The interpreter, erl, works fine, but when I wanted to close it, I ran into a small issue.
Because I never know what the command is to close an interpreter, I usually use the EOF character (^D), that is widely recognized. Except erl does not react to it, not even a tiny message saying it won't close or doesn't recognize the output.
Alright then, let's try quit. That's an atom, it does not behave how I want.
quit() is an undefined shell command, exit() terminates the shell process but the interpreter automatically starts a new one...
But I get the welcome message, telling me to abort with ^G! Some progress, finally... except ^G redirects from Erlang interpreter to user switch command. Damn, another interpreter...

I ended up killing the process from an other terminal.

I was so close to getting my macOS virtual machine fully working on my Razer Blade... But then I discovered that something with OpenGL/GLX doesn’t work properly, so I can’t use any graphics-heavy applications until I somehow figure out what’s wrong 😞

They say it will take you 300 years to download the internet. You probably can't do that but you can get pretty close. Just hit Rebuild on Android.

Customer complains about an issue after a software update. The head of department himself tested the update and got an error message.

Me looking at the logs. Ok, that's an issue, but based on hardware failure, customer should fix his hardware, no relation to the new software.
But surprisingly close to the software update, which piques my curiosity.

Me looking at older logs ... same issue. EVERY FUCKING DAY. For months. The corresponding error message only appears if a user is logged on, so quite a few people have seen it. Obviously nobody cared. Maybe we just ditch error messages, it'll save lots of work.

I may not be the guy who 'sudo rm -rf /' for a company but I dang near came close and had a heart attack...

I'm pulling an all-nighter. And I'm still nowhere close to being done for desktop. But mobile is pretty much there. Mind you, I have work in 6 hours and counting

Back to using WSL because I suck at installing windows apps on Wine (and that I can't seem to connect to a WiFi with PEAP on Linux that the network admin know how to except on Windows).

So can't exactly rice Windows. I know I can with raindock and all that but its not the same as Linux. So I'm on WSL, installed tmux and wouldn't you know it, I found plenty of dot tmux files on Github.

But alas, its not the same as i3wm but its close.

So my business developer informs me that he couldn't log in to a particular account. He as tried to log in but couldn't. I used my account and logged in fine. Tries with the credentials he gave again and was bounced. After about 15 minutes of wasting my time, I found out was giving me wrong username.
"Check the username again" I said as calm as I could.
Realizes his mistake and
" oh ... Sorry"...
If he only he knew how close I was to exploding...

That moment when you finally decide to close devRant ... but before the closing-animation even fully stopped some kind of reflex moves your finger and opens devRant again.

Why the fuck is Seagate's official bootable HDD/SSD toolkit 32-bit??? It's bad enough that it's TinyCore, but it's 32-bit, so even while booting it tells you to fuck off if a drive has >2TB worth of LBAs, but it's meant for ALL their drives! Their Twitter support was predictably useless, too, and was just "we don't support running the bootable disc off of anything larger than 32GB" and "we don't officially support Linux formatted disks in our tools" (neither of which were even remotely close. The first one I can understand, it was an untrained knee-jerk reaction to a number they recognize, but the other one...)

When you get that customer's customer who forgets what the email is about:

-customer's customer was complaining they couldn't see a thing on some website-

Me: "That reference number didn't work... can you give me another reference number or something that might help find the thing?"

Customer's Customer: "I'm sorry but you're going to be more specific, I can't help you without a reference number."

-It appears customer's customer thinks I'm asking them for help now... let's see if...-

Me: "Never mind, close ticket."

Customer's Customer: "Ok!"

-me closes ticket-

┐(´ー｀)┌

hi, i have a question of a darker note, hope you won't mind.

How do you deal with monotony at work ?
The more experienced i get, the more my work becomes monotonous. I understand that it's impossible to know everything, but i feel as if there's not that much knowledge left for everyday work.
Sure there will always be new scenarios and more advanced/marginal stuff, but they don't appear that often.
i get depressed (not clinically, just very bad state overall) when i stop learning, which is why i've been strugling quite a bit recently.

i have ~3 years in web dev. So i'm not some kind of guru or anything even close, but this is the problem i have right now.

i've been thinking about switching languages or specialisation (i do enjoy DevOps/sysadmin work), but i'm afraid i'll have the same problem pretty soon...

Anyone here worked a whole lot with low level programming?

I have always worked with high level languages like Python and C++, but I’ve also had an interest in working with embedded systems, real close to the metal.

Any directions on where I should go to start learning low level programming? Sites, languages, etc?

Appreciated devRant fam!😊

Fucking illnesses suck ass.

On Thursday afternoon I started get a feeling of “fullness” in my left ear, nothing major, thought it was just my hay fever.

Got progressively worse and ended going to the local walk in center (out of hours drs) and got prescribed a course of anti biotics.

I know they take time to kick in and I won’t feel any effects for a day or two, but fuck me I feel rougher than a badgers arse.

I assume I have ruptured my ear drum as my ear is leaking, but the swelling means I can’t close my mouth properly, the pressure makes it feel like my head is going to burst.

I am not sure if this is the best place for it, but let's go:

I am 35 years old and I always worked in the localization industry. I really love to code and I always developed small tools and scripts to help me and others at work, but now the company is going bad and it has the chance to close.

I was reckon if it would be a good idea to give development a try, besides my age and the lack of experience in a real development place. I am not even sure if I use programming good practices, as I always developed by myself.

Do you have any opinion about it?

Thank you so much!

.Dispose();
.Close();
.Dispose();

what an idiot! and his profile said he had 4 years of experience...

oh, yes, and that thing of not using arrays...
I have even more code from this guy, but one picture is enough

I can cope with the workload and the silly client requests but I think my bullshit-threshold is very close to being breached.
One more thing and I'm not sure my brain will be able to act fast enough to stop my mouth shouting a horrible string of profanity.

I want to sleep. But I better close this Jira issuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu zzzzzzzzzzz

!dev
„Keep 2m distance“...
Funny.. as if I would get that close to other humans..

Jokes aside, I feel uncomfortable if I’m less than 1.5m to another person and I avoid touching at all cost by nature.. Except for family but they are not in my country anyway. I think I’ll be fine..

#ImALonelyBastard

Oh thanks Windows. I wasn't working. And that Windows 10 upgrade I very specifically confirmed as cancelled ... yeah, go ahead and start that installation with no warning, while I'm working, sitting at a Starbucks that will eventually close and cutoff my ready access to power on a device with limited battery life, probably before you finish the update.

I don't mind sitting here twiddling my thumbs while you do your thing ...

Not that I didn't plan to upgrade, I actually like Windows 10 ... but it wasn't on the agenda for this particular moment.

o.O

I makes a React mistake, alright I is fool.

I caused an endless loop, but Chrome won't let me diagnose it, because when you have an endless loop, you can't close the tab, can't open devtools, can't debug to find the source.

I dunno how this happened, but this browser in VisualWorks decided to crash for like no reason (it wasn't even running the app), and is impossible to close. At all. Like there is only one process.

Why, Smalltalk, why?

I haven't touched my OpenVPN server configuration in almost a year. Everything seemed to "just work" the way I wanted it.
I have now just found out that all ipv6 DNS queries were actually going to the wrong ip.

Why am I such a magnet for stupid shit like this?
Every time I try to do something beautiful, elaborate, complex, I always get some small shitty detail wrong.
It's like "close, but no cigar".
Every.
Single.
Time.

Sigh

Bonus fun fact: I only found out thanks to Windows' DNS leak feature. Thanks, Windows!

I think it related to the app crashes, but now, instead of crashing, the app thinks it has no internet and loads forever things. Usually happens when I put the app in the background and don’t force close it.

Closing the app multiple times and switching to other apps fixes it, most of the time, not always.

But it still crashes. Less... but it still does, no specific patterns to see.

iPhone 6S

I know it's old but it happened again and I had to waste a few minutes because I couldn't disable the bloody task this time.
But using psexec tools worked.
Guess micro and soft describes their ux team.

Look at the balls on their micro cocks. "Heads up". How dare you scare me like that on *my* fucking machine that I paid for, god dammit.
"We're going to make Windows better...". Can it suck my dick after updating? Because I'd like to choke the retard genes out of it.

The only thing that comes close to it is the fucking swiping keyboard that I'm using to type this rant.

When you think you know something and you can close the Task in a day ....
But your manager adds requirements at every stage and it's been 4 days, 50 commits but the task is still open ....

Manager Y U Do this?

2nd week on a new job, already been assigned smaller Jira tickets to work on.
But it takes me awhile to figure it out and close the ticket, coz it’s React and I’m completely new to it and I feel I have no idea what I’m doing.
Imposter syndrome hitting hard

The most annoying coworker I've had is one I still work with! He thinks he's a know-it-all but when ut comes to actually solving a problem, he can't think anywhere close to as innovatively as he portrays himself to be. -_- Oh well, some things you just cant help

Just helped in the little 'Büdchen' (kiosk comes close, but in reality it is more of an little super market) around the corner to Update the firmware of a money bill verifier and counter... As there are new 50 Euro bills.

God. Serial to USB. After running installer and starting firmware update, the owner was a bit frightened as it took so long....

XD

Setup. 30 secs. Firmware. 6 Minutes. XD

This afternoon I had my first close encounter with a core dump, while working on my C++ simulation. It was brutal and I probably opted for the less efficient solution to avoid the problem, after hours of fighting. But hey. I'm alive and that is what matters most.

For US salaried developers here, a young soon-to-be employed graduate has a question...

When it comes to salaried work, is it just a matter of work "close to 40 hours but really just get your work done" or should I be trying to fill a seat for 8 hours a day even if I don't have anything to work on? And if I'm non-exempt (elligible for overtime over 40hrs), is it reasonable for me to be here 9 hours a day, or should I be capping it off at 8?

I know these are questions for my employer but it's gonna be a bit before I actually start work and I'm curious.

Talking about UX design.

Im on facebook scrolling down all this shit news and then i see one of my friend commenting on one post.

I tap on it and .... The commenting list appear but it not scroll to my friend comment... Close this shit get mad close facebook 😂

Long story short facebook sucks cocks

Just got out of a dev hellhole
Being stuck in one is just minecraft where the diamonds move and you don't wanna stop digging cause they look close but they keep getting away

I want to switch over to Linux again, Windows just annoys me a lot lately. Thing is, I don't know what distro I wanna use yet.
I want one that is:
0. Security focused, so encryption, VPN and so on. (I know software could do the job, but would be nice if it comes with the OS)
1. Not hard to configure, but I should be able to configure it more when I want to.
2. Not too ulgy looking.

I have a little bit of experience with Linux, but I'm not even close a professional.
Looking forward to your suggestions!

Thanks I hate it, I hate the fact that typescript will still transpile this. Not an exact copy of the code I'm working with, but close enough. Also this code targets es3, but we generate tsconfigs that say es5 (which don't actually get used) which leads me to believe that we generate them soley for the benefit of ides, and because if they said es3 the ide would show even more errors

To create a really amazing OSS, I don't even care if anyone uses it or if it becomes popular or anything, I just want to do it to prove to myself that I don't need to get paid to write good code, I can do it to make the world a better place too.

This has really been my main goal for a long time now, sure I've written some a few OSS but I don't consider them up to that standard yet, but I am working on something right now that will get close if I ever manage to finish it and if it is well written.

Senior dev on our team is concerned that we are raising standards above and beyond what we need to deliver the project.

For 6m+ this project has delivered little, but what there is is full of bugs that got through testing, and no standards (coding or otherwise) in place at all.

I hate dealing with people who preach “good enough” is fine but won’t accept they aren’t even close to doing “good enough”

Did you know, any time you copy text on Windows 10, windows saves the url of the page you copied it from?

Don't know where it is saved, or how long it is cached, but the more you know.

Steps to replicate:
Go into your browser, copy any text from any site. Close the window.
Open one note. Paste text. Theres the url.

I think clipboard saves the url when you copy text from a browser, dunno. but its interesting.

A lady that I have been talking to suddenly went radio silent on me. And refused to answer my messages and calls.

Anyhow, I blocked her and deleted her contact but I’m so heartbroken. I hope I recover from this heartache. It’s so close. I thought it was gonna work. I thought this was the one.

This is just why I love computers. When you mess up, they tell you you mess up and even point to the line and column. Humans are damn difficult.

Hey guys, I know this isn't the best place for skate stuff, but does anyone here skate? Im close to doing a heelflip and a kickflip, please post your photos of you skating, or riding a bmx, scooter etc.

How do you deal with a manager like this?

My manager is close with 2 colleagues who constantly suck up to them and who they're pretty much friends with.

I don't particularly like to do stuff like that and don't really like the manager either (in my opinion they're incompetent) but now, often when I write code, the manager will have those colleagues "check" it. Not peer review, as I never get feedback. Just occasionally I'll find out they "checked" my code to see if I work/do my job right.

This is despite me being more senior than the both of them, having contributed far more actual code to the project than both combined and one of them can not even write proper code!!!

I'm honestly tired of sitting here and working on boring long tasks, and then being treated (behind my back) as if I am not working.

It's building up this paranoia in my head that this problem is also making other colleages/my boss think that I am slacking.

I used to be so close with everyone at the company, but now I feel completely alone and alienated...

Finding internships as a college student is aggravating... I applied to 12 different companies in the last month and have only heard back from one and now I'm stressing out because it's getting very close to summer and I have no job. I have to pay for college and food and all that shit somehow but I can't exactly do anything about it besides apply to more companies and just sit and wait

Hey people,

Can anyone point me at a cms that I don't have to fight with design and programming wise but is still easy for someone not even close to tech savy to edit and add content?

So, A very close friend of mine is a fellow computer science student. But she has no interest in coding. Mostly because she never tried it. Is there any post or video that can help her find a motivation.

I know that interest comes from within, but set that aside for a while and help me out with something that inspired you.

I am getting really close to actually FINISHING the avatar editor, this took way less than I anticipated but there are still many bugs in that thing that I haven’t discovered yet and that I have already discovered.

Last night i sat down at 6pm to free up some disk space on /boot, because i didnt properly size it months ago on first installation.

5:20am i close my laptop with a fresh install, and no more WinBlows.

Didnt set out to do it, but Im not mad that it happened.

I promised myself that if I didn't start up a new relationship by September that I would plan to start a new lease in life and move in 2019. The online dating subscription I've used for a few years will cancel at the end of this month.

I used to doubt that fate was real, but times like this make me come close to believing in it. Maybe fate is just one large karmic refactoring.