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Search - "what what what what?"
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Me: *Watching a movie*
Main Character: "Oh no, we have to hack the CIA to figure out how this machine works! Hacker girl, do the stuff"
Hacker Girl: "Consider it done!"
Hacker Girl: *Opens Linux bash*
Hacker Girl: *types 'mkdir Hack_CIA'
Hacker Girl: "They have two-factor authentication in place, this is going to be a hard one."
Hacker Girl: *Types 'cd Hack_CIA'*
Hacker Girl: "I'm in!"
Me: "..."
Friend: "Wow, so well done, so realistic!"
Me: *Dies*82 -
Root ain't givin' no fucks no mo'
My boss just demanded that I join a conference call. So, I call in, and there's three other people there.
He starts chewing me out for talking with some vendor directly (their VP emailed me directly and asked for a few things, and i was instructed to make him happy). Apparently I used "confusing wording" and "did not talk his language." Bossman was really getting into gear for a ten-minute berating.
It turns out that the guy in question only read half of my first email, and totally ignored the second email where I told him everything was finished and live and working. I told my boss quite bluntly that the guy should have read what I had written, and that he was an idiot. The boss's defense of the guy? "Well, he's a sales guy." I just laughed at him.
Later, bossman started in on me (once again) for not making enough progress on this ridiculous shared-spreadsheet sales tool he wants, saying "We discussed this a week ago!"
I casually reminded him that we had talked about it for the first time ever on Friday night (today is Tuesday), and he had said it wasn't going to be a priority for the next three weeks(!). Again he stopped in his tracks. Again, I laughed at him.
Guy's a tool and I'm so done with caring.
Root's going to be flippant and angry. Root's going to have fun (:
What's he gonna do, fire me? 😂25 -
At job interview.
They: What would you describe as your biggest character flaw?
Me: *rolls d8* I pretend not to understand the local language in order to avoid interactions I would rather not have.
They: What?
Me: ¿que?6 -
Windows, you fucking idiot! You scheduled that damn update and now you have the balls to ask me what happened?!7
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So a friend of Mine asked me to check their Mail server because some emails got lost. Or had a funny signature.
Mails were sent from outlook so ok let's do this.
I go create a dummy account, and send/receive a few emails. All were coming in except one and some had a link appended. The link was randomly generated and was always some kind of referral.
Ok this this let's check the Mail Server.
Nothing.
Let's check the mail header. Nothing.
Face -> wall
Fml I want to cry.
Now I want to search for a pattern and write a script which sends a bunch of mails on my laptop.
Fuck this : no WLAN and no LAN Ports available. Fine let's hotspot the phone and send a few fucking mails.
Guess what? Fucking cockmagic, no funny mails appear!
At that moment I went out and was like chainsmoking 5 cigarettes.
BAM!
It hit me! A feeling like a unicorn vomiting rainbows all over my face.
I go check their firewall. Shit redirected all email ports from within the network to another server.
Yay nobody got credentials because nobody new it existed. Damn boy.
Hook on to the hostmachine power down the vm, start and hack yourself a root account before shit boots. Luckily I just forgot the credentials to a testvm some time ago so I know that shit. Lesson learned: fucking learn from your mistakes, might be useful sometimes!
Ok fucker what in the world are you doing.
Do some terminal magic and see that it listens on the email ports.
Holy cockriders of the galaxy.
Turns out their former it guy made a script which caught all mails from the server and injected all kind of bullshit and then sent them to real Webserver. And the reason why some mails weren't received was said guy was too dumb to implement Unicode and some mails just broke his script.
That fucker even implented an API to pull all those bullshit refs.
I know your name "Matthias" and I know where you live and what you've done... And to fuck you back for that misery I took your accounts and since you used the same fucking password for everything I took your mail, Facebook and steam account too.
Git gut shithead! You better get a lawyer15 -
TL;DR: Teacher wants to invest in my company 😲
So, just this morning as I headed to class (still in school, 17 years old, from Germany) someone tapped me from behind - a female teacher whom I've only seen a few times (She is a really nice and friendly teacher who teaches economics)
She asked me: Aren't you the young businessman? I've seen your interview, fantastic! (Background info: I recently founded my second firm (Webdevelopment, Design and Marketing) and was quite often in the media (local newspaper, television, radio))
Quite unsure, I responded: "yeah, right".
Promptly she asked: "Is there some way I can invest in your company? Perhaps in stocks?" (Of course we can't offer stocks, we're just a small local company lol)
Me: "There always is a way I guess?" (I was extremely grateful but didn't know how to respond)
Her: "Great! Would you mind sending me an email with your contact info?"
What the fuck just happened. 😂15 -
Me: good morning, what can I help you with?
Client: I THINK REMOVED SOMETHING AND NOW ALL MY EMAIL IS GONE. HELP.
M: okay sir, do you have the domain for m....
C: HEY WAIT IT'S BACK NEVER MIND THANKS BYE
M: Oh tha....
*click*
😆5 -
After it was revealed that the Equifax hack was even bigger yet again, the US government said something that really made me say/think something in the trend of "WHAT the actual FUCK?!"
"This data is in the hands of cyber criminals anyways".
You run the biggest mass surveillance program in the world, sucking up more than a million terabytes every hour, then at least could you PRETEND to care/take interest when the personal data of about all your citizens appears on the Internet?!
Fucking hell.11 -
Me : hey, why have you taped out your webcam ?
Him : shhhh, they are watching.
Me : what ?
Him : what ?16 -
Just received my very first pull request on GitHub. Pull request: "Remove jquery as dependency".
* Makes repo private *9 -
So today , a company phoned me for a job I applied in Jobstreet. So the conversation goes like this.
Com " Do you have any experience in Android studio? "
Me : " Yes . I develop android application, it is compulsory to know actually."
Com :" ok... Do you have experience android SDK?"
Me : " I believe you are referring to the Android studio, yes."
Com :" do you have experience in Android programming"?
Me :" Yes. I do android application for both native and hybrid. As for hybrid, I use flutter."
Com :" Ok...but I was asking about android."
Me :*explaining what I just said *
Com: " you no understand! We need android programmer! Not native or flutter programmer!"
Me *explaining what native and hybrid is (in simple terms)
Com : " it is ok then.. our company prefer those who can develop android app , not native programmer or anything flutter programmer.
"
(Btw , I transcript how exactly that person talk to me)
My question to this person is.... WHAT THE F*** IS THIS? WANT AN ANDROID DEVELOPER BUT NOT NATIVE OR "FLUTTER"? WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN ? IF ANDROID IS NOT WRITTEN IN NATIVE OR HYBRID THEN WHAT YOU EXPECT ME TO USE THEN? USING ASSEMBLY X64?14 -
Someone at work trying to impress me: I recently got a really nice PC! It runs Microsoft 10 and has an i5 graphics card and a high performance case!
Me:6 -
So what do you do for a living?
- I fix shit. While i do that, i break some other shit and then i fix that shit.2 -
OMFG it happened again. I'm always very explicit with recruiters that I don't take full time employment while I'm studying. This one was very understanding about it and said he found a great match for my skillset.
I just had a meeting with the CEO of this great match of a company.
- "No, we only seek people who can work full time, let's keep in touch when you've graduated".
What the fuck, way to waste everyones time.10 -
I now know another person's password without even wanting to.
He was sitting in the row in front of me, logging into our course page and then *brrrrraaaaapppp* - ran his index finger along the top number row and hit enter.
1234567890
I don't even know what to say.13 -
> le server suddenly stops working, no boot, no POST, no beeps, no video
*le frantic cursing on how perhaps that's why the fucking thing was only €60 🤬*
*takes out RAM*
> le server still not booting
*places RAM back without doing anything else*
> le server boots up again
🤔🤔🤔
Is this what they mean with things like "compile it again and somehow the compiler will not complain anymore after a while"?16 -
Every single time I try to find a solution to a problem I'm having....
Who were you? What did you see?4 -
YoU nEEd tO tHInK MorE LiKe oUr nOn tEcHnICal UsErs
That's your fucking job you powerpoint monkey, I'm writing code since age of 14, I distrust everything that doesn't spit out logs of what it's extacly doing to my console including you, my gf says sudo to get my attention, how the hell am I supposed to know how normies think16 -
Just wow. I am amazed by what just happened.
A year ago my parents decided to switch from desktop to laptop for convenience. Knowing their needs, i bought them one without an OS and installed Ubuntu 16.04 on it. The thing is that if you do a regular maintenance of the laptop once a year at their partner company, you get additional 4 years of warranty (this offer is amazing).
So today was the day I brought the laptop for this maintenance for the first time. They make you a profile on their support website where you can track shit regarding your device, super convenient. First thing I notice that the login page was not https. Awkward, but there is no sensitive data here so i let it pass. Naturally i forgot my password, so I requested a new one and guess what? I recieved it in plaintext via mail. A tech repair oriented company does this, my god.
I went there, gave them the laptop in question and got a piece of paper, where they wrote that the laptop is in their hands now, and the current physical state of the laptop, and blabla.
I got home and I read what the guy wrote among other things: THE OPERATING SYSTEM IS NOT LEGAL.
How the fuck is Ubuntu not legal??? What the fuck is this shit? I sure as hell didn't torrent it or bought a booteged copy on the streets.11 -
Y'know what I can't understand? People who knock and literally immediately come in. THEN WHATS THE FUCKING POINT OF KNOCKING9
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So today I learned i can pay my property taxes online. The way you pay is:
1. Enter address (street #, I live in an apt)
2. It will show all matches **including the owners full name**
3. If you click view, it shows the full account history...6 -
teaching myself pointers right now
here is my learning process right now:
1. what even is this
2. wow this is neat
3. why does this even exist
4. what even is this
5. repeat9 -
Shoutout to the guy who stored his entire website in a JSON file and then asked me why his app wasnt working2
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Just set a cron on a coworkers machine to play "What does the fox say" at max volume at 8 when he's the only one here.
May need to review the security footage in the morning.2 -
Dad: [this company] is coming to town soon.
Me: I know
Dad: yeah maybe you can get a IT job
Me: I dont do IT
Dad: You never know what you do until you do it.
Me: *getting an aneurism from sheer ignorance*
I DO IT EVERY DAY HOW WOULD I NOT KNOW WHAT IM DOING THAT I EVEN WENT TO SCHOOL FOR?15 -
Our PM is on vacation. And our CTO/CEO takes control of the PM role.
So today he decided it was time to just start a customer change request. Regardless of the customer not having approved the actual solution and estimate.
He just said that he did not want to waste any more time talking to the customer. Now they are gonna get what ever he thinks they want.
I predict this to backfire in a fabulous way. What could possible go wrong🤔4 -
Got a new job this week with a huge raise at an awesome new company! It's wonderful being paid what you're worth! Now if the current company can just fire me so I can have a two week vacation, that'd be great.11
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I don't go to the doctor and tell him what tools to use. I was just told to delete the .scss files because they were taking up too much room and to put all partials and images at root instead of in descriptive folders.3
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Tutorials on the Internet.
They say you have to enter a 12 Character long hexadecimal number.
AND THEN THEY PUT A "G" IN THERE?
WHAT? ARE YOU STUPID OR SOMETHING?3 -
What manner of imbecile writes a password reset function that passes the email and password as god damn query parameters, in the email link....1
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I have a VPS for under a year from Digital Ocean. No idea what to do with it.
Specs:
20GB Disk
512MB RAM
Debian 8.9 x64
A spare domain from Namecheap
IP: 127.0.0.1
Ideas?42 -
A brief, and biased opinion of what love is in the dev world:
Love is my employees bringing me something to eat when they know I stay back so that they can all go out do whatever they can do.
Love is my CMS admin getting his ass up and walking all the way to my office when the director walks in to say some STUPID FUCKING SHIT to me that he(CMS Admin) knows would have me 2 fucking seconds away from getting out of my chair and drop kicking the fuck out of him.
Love is the rest of my employees getting up to follow along in case(certainly) one dude is not able to hold me down.
Love is them knowing that I know that their mere presence there will make me chill the fuck out and not choke the fucking director
Love is the CMS Admin proof reading every email I send to a bitch that was trying to get smart, to make sure that I was not being agressive.
Love is said CMS Admin bringing me coffee or a coke congratulating me on listening to him about X email not being aggressive (there is no passive in my vocabulary, just balls out "isn't this your fucking job" aggressive)
Love is my lead developer showing to work after medical treatment fucked up as all hell because he knows that if he is not there I will do a billion things myself in order to give him some rest.
Love is taking my CMS admin and lead dev out to eat when a major stakeholder shits on something I damn well know it took them a while to finish. Love is also letting me open up to said stakeholder to tell them how much of a fucktard they are, sometimes they let me loose, and I appreciate that.
Love is every small person in the company approaching you to tell you of their issues, becuase they care more about the productivity they give to their users, rather than the bullshit numbers their managers care about.
Love is the staff of other places taking care of you because you are not a VP dickhead that treats them like shit.
Love is the HR reps sending you personal e-mails asking you for help because their shitbag of a boss does not count for help and leaves them in the blank with shit software, for which said HR go above and beyond for you later on even though said shitbag manager said no.
Love is your team getting angry and responding respectfully at people when they talk shit about their manager on their emails (manager being me)
Love is your employees closing your door for you when they know you are overwhelmed and you need a quick second to pull yourself up.
Love is not wanting to leave this miserable place because you know some dickweed will be left in charge of the people that care for you, trust you, work for you regardless of the date, and confide in you.
They got me locked in, this shitty institution, for now. Until I find a way to bring my entire team with me.8 -
This guest at our house was checking out the whiteboard in my room. It had some JavaScript code i wanted to keep in mind and some ReactJs stuff
Him: you know, I can recommend you a book, if you're into reading?
Me: well, I don't have that much time to read, I prefer online tutorials
(We're interrupted at that point)
(Later at dinner)
Me: which book were you gonna recommend me btw
Him: there's this psychology book I'm reading...
Me: oh.3 -
Me: So, tell me more about what you want me to code.
Friend: Well... Do something nice.
Me: Like?
Friend: I don't know, I thought you're the expert...
Me: You motherf...1 -
Friend: Hey, so what do you do?
Me: I build backend systems and apis. I work with java/mongodb. I dable into some elixir and kotlin on my free time.
Friend: Cool, can you build me an Android app?11 -
What. The. Actual. Fuck.
My co-workers just tried to convince me that the following is a secure password:
"ThisIsASecurePassword2018"
Just... I mean... Why? *sigh*
Their argumentation is based on the new NIST guidelines.
If they've read these guidelines CAREFULLY though... (not only the appendix) it actually states "Don't use words from the dictionary". Passwords like these should even be rejected right away.15 -
As a developer, I want to write clean code and I want managers that understand the importance of clean code. I don’t want to work with people who force me to deploy untested code because "we need this feature working today".9
-
*finishes university exams*
*gets to code after a long time*
*cannot remember what the code does that was written a few weeks back*
Fuck 😓3 -
The new guy:
- I'm a big fan of effectiveness and efficiency. The faster can you do the task - the better.
- naah, typing in the terminal is soo inefficient. Typing, remembering commands, parameters, paths... That's such a drag! Such a lag! Having a button I could click to do the job is far better!
- OSS is the root of all the evil!
- I'd like to try linux once again. I like it, hopefully I won't need to spend another couple of weeks setting up dual-gpu power management and searches for an Intel wifi's dual-antennae driver.
- I need a bluetooth mouse for my laptop. Using trackpoint or a touchpad is a nonsense [I agree abt the trackpoint]. Using a keyboard/typing for navigation?!? That's utter nonsense!
- I'd like to try i3wm, it looks effective and efficient
it's happened within the last month and I'm still trying to compile all this input into his preferences. So far I'm getting too many conflicting errors13 -
What if we were the AI created by God to automate repetitive tasks and now we are making AI to automate those repetitive tasks and this goes on and on until the world gets a stack overflow.9
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> be me
> post-well-structured question on SO
> very next millisecond, the question gets downvoted
> ¯\_(ツ)_/¯7 -
Earlier I was viewing my HTML document, but when I opened it this popped up. Musdguest is the name of my school's WiFi, and this kinda looks like the source code for my school's website...?6
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GUYS I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE:
Apparently Windows Explorer is an internet browser and a lot of websites only work on it
I fucking hate this dude, he CLEARLY doesn't know what he's talking about8 -
So I've got this raspberry pi 3 and no inspiration what to use it for.. and it bugs me, just sitting there taunting me: -"you aren't very creative are you?" So.. ideas and suggestions?21
-
I was having dinner with two girls, one a project manager and the other some finance reviewer or something like that. We were discussing our line of work and I was talking about how bad quality code affects everybody and the finance reviewer girl goes like (and I quote) "In our company we use polymorphism, inheritance and encapsulation so it's not a big problem. So our database has a parent class and we only use the parent class". I was at a loss for words. I mean, if only more programmers just did that, right?14
-
Coworker: We you have to estimate these tasks.
Me (thinking): This task should take one day, but I'll add 4 hours in case something unexpected happens again.
* Estimates 12h
Coworker: Alright, the tasks for this sprint have been selected. Please start to work on them.
Me: * Starts working on certain task
* Sees time available for task
2d 4h (=20h)
* Writes coworker
Dude, that much time is overkill for that task!
Coworker: Yeah, the client said something similar.
Me: Then why did you estimate it that high?
Coworker: 🤷♂️
Me: Ok, what am I gonna do with all that extra time? 😑
Coworker: 🤷♂️
Thanks mate.
Around 4 hours in and almost done. What should I do with that extra time?
Task in question: Add a mutually exclusive field to a database table, add it to the form, test it and update the docs.
Enjoy the unrelated, clickbait cat13 -
> 1:1 meeting with a CTO from Fortune 500 (any minute now)
> spilled coffee over the table and both computers
*taking a dog outside, so she doesn’t talk during the meeting*
> some dudes injecting drugs in the corner
My day is a shitty Hollywood movie 🍿8 -
Hey guys I just installed Arch Linux and a desktop environment, I don't know what to do with my life now...10
-
The FCC Chairman is going ahead with his plan to repeal net neutrality despite objections from fellow commissioners, the CTO, more than a hundred members of Congress, senators and of course, the people.
What the fuck is wrong with this guy? How far up your own fucking ass does your head have to be to ignore basically everyone's vote against you? What the fuck. This guy is a really piece of fucking work. I hope this bounces back to bite him in the ass real hard.15 -
I enjoy listening to Metalcore while coding. It really helps me calm down and focus/concentrate (the irony of that whilst having someone scream right into my ears 😂). It also helps me chill and regulate my emotions better. Am I weird? What helps you focus and code better?31
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What if devRant made this app just to see how to improve their own company without looking like shit?1
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Started a new job this week.
Just learned that my manager strictly prohibits while loops and "if else" statements.23 -
Was just told by a guy in my class proudly, “yeah, I’m pretty good at typing. It comes in handy for when I code stuff in class.” Awesome, that’s cool. I ask what he’s doing in the class. “We learned Scratch last semester and now we’re starting Java.” -______-6
-
I had the weirdest dream. Michael Cera was a developer I was working with. I had a meeting with him and discovered that he spoke 3 different Indian languages fluently.9
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Client:we want dynamic mapping of network and packet flow visualization like;packet tracer simulation
Us: is 2D visualization enough.
Client:yeah
*fast forward after first demo*
Client: now make it 3D with pipes representing cable.and packets flowing through them like water.
Me: fucccccck3 -
So I have a chrome extension, and someone reviewed it. At first she gave me one star, and wrote "extension is not working, bad UI, not good!" And ten minutes later, she gave me five stars and wrote "good extension, good features, working fine, good UI, loved it".
I saw this a week after, and I wonder: what happened in these ten minutes?5 -
met a client yesterday to discuss about the coming task. After discussion, we agreed that I will develop the API for the system in one month. I did the planning and posted the upcoming tasks in Trello. Today, he told me some of the tasks have been done by his staff and asked me if I can continue the remaining tasks and get it done in one week. Hey, bro, what you want!? it is not what we agreed! do you think i can understand the code that your staff wrote, with poor documentation and structure, in few hours and immediately start working on it, yet deliver everything with high quality? come on...5
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At what point can you say you are a programmer of a language? Is there an exact amount of lines of code carved in stone somewhere? I call myself a Python Programmer because even know I am self tought, I have been working with the language for years and I am very good with it. "Professional" level by some accounts, though I wouldn't go as far to say that myself. I have been working with Java a couple of weeks and it has been going very well, but I wouldn't call myself a Java programmer, but should I? At what point does one pass that line?
Idk.. Just a little shower thought for ya. What do you think?29 -
"We should probably fix that security issue, but the application already works, so it does not matter" - My boss2
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An IT guy told me during a phone meeting set up to talk about how he builds these web forms on a dumb CRM for a client of ours that he has been an IT professional for 25 years.
He says he doesn't know much about the codey stuff.
What do IT professionals do again?8 -
I have a developer job and being paid less than my uni classfellows who are in QA and support positions. Aren't developers supposed to be paid more?10
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My father calls me very worried: hey, do you know your mother's email login username and password? We need it
Me: no? Why would I?
My father: well, she sent it to you on email when she created it, so you'd remember!
?? What?2 -
Just got AWS free subscription, had fun for 30 mins. Now I don't know what to do with it. Can someone give me idea for something to do with it.17
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I've been wondering what tech will be like in 50 years time,
I can only imagine it will be insane compared to today's tech.
I mean we have only really had 30 solid years or so of computers in people's hands. And the world is.. absolutely different . And really 20 years of internet (when it's been properly mainstream)
If your 20 now you have about a 50-60% chance of being able to see 2070
I think I really want to see that.
I promise I ain't high 🤔5 -
I'm currently working in call center. Making them a management system for agents. I'm the only developer there. No one asks about the progress even the owner doesn't know a thing about softwares. This gives me a freedom to do work when I want and how fast I want. But because of this I don't care anymore about the little things. and I have adopted some bad programming habits during my stay. Should I quit or what?6
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I finally got to updating my old laptop when I saw a post about Ubuntu 18.04 being released. What do you guys think of it?8
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So this just happened. Some background before I begin: We're understaffed, my desk is in the back of the building, and there's no one really at the front to greet people. No security either...
Guy walks in wearing a flannel jacket (no shirt under it), pajama pants, and sandals. He looks like hell. Explains he was just released from a hospital and his apartment is locked. I let him use my phone to call his sister.
When I talk to his sister, she barely wants to speak with him. Tells me his apartment is locked for a reason and he's not allowed back. I'm just like: "So... what would you have us do for him?" At this point if his sister won't help, I was going to ask him to leave. Oh, and that hospital was a drug rehab.
So it ends with him waiting for a ride, but he ends up napping on the couch in the front of our office. CEO/Owner and his business partner walk right past and say nothing. They go into a meeting. I'm trying to figure out if I ask him to leave, wait outside for his ride... I'm a developer, this isn't my job.
A good 45-60 minutes later, after the guy walked outside and then came back in and laid back down on the couch, he leaves with his ride. Shortly after the owner walks out of his meeting, so I ask him what to do in this situation - more hoping he'd realize the need for more security.
If this story isn't crazy enough, the business partner pipes up - absolutely serious - and says he didn't say anything because he thought the guy was a developer.
So I've learned that we've got extremely low hygiene standards for developers here, with a relaxed dress code and are allowed nap times on the front couch.
Thankfully our CYBER security is better than our PHYSICAL security. :|1 -
!rant
Does anyone know what the Boolean Pythagorean Triples problem or the Ramsey Theory? I read about it while reading an article on brute reason, a kind of compliment to brute force...8 -
Today I was working on a laptop. I needed to uninstall a program because i had to install the newest version of it. That process usually takes 2 hours, but 3 hours passed and the uninstall was still at 35%. I went on the task manager to see if I could figure out what is running on the laptop, that's when I saw this.... This laptop has been on for 314 days. This cannot be a normal thing to do on a laptop specially when running Windows. Why do this?7
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As a software engineer, I’ve only *ever* worked remotely. I honestly have no idea what it’s like working in an office as a dev/engineer. Probably makes me weird. 😅
What did you like about working in an office, if you’ve had that experience? Was mentoring different? What did you dislike about it?29 -
"How do we share access to two-factor authentication."
What you mean is "how do we defeat the purpose of multi-factor authentication."4 -
What was the most stupid thing interview ever do to you?
My side of story. He (interviewer, also a developer) try to convince me that JavaScript and Java are the same thing. Which we all know that is not...
He said "I can't hire someone who don't know basic of computer science , this is basic that JavaScript is from Java"
(Isn't ecmascript or something?)
Saying JavaScript is From Java is a wrong statement. There are differences between having a DICK and Being a DICK.5 -
When a client sends you an email with multiple question marks "????" Just because you havent answered an email solely stating "ok thanks" in the past 24 hours.
What am I even supposed to do with that dude?
PS we need to fix some stuff on his wordpress website thingy to which we agreed literally a day ago. First of all do you really expect we magically fixed everything today even or ehm at least try to be friendly instead of just sending a bunch of question marks thank you very much3 -
THICK-HEADED FUCKNUTS!
I have absolutely no idea as to why these would ever be password requirements, can someone please try to explain WHY THE FUCK4 -
I had a USB WiFi dongle installed and working great. Then someone pulled it out of my computer, without talking to me, so they could use it. I found another in the office...exact same model...plug it in. Drivers don't work. Can't update them. Reinstallation crashes. Try to restart computer, it crashes. Restart computer and now Outlook won't even open. No idea what to do now, but this is going on an hour and counting of no productivity.
WTF Windows? You can't even handle a WiFi dongle right?3 -
dude@milotic:~$ vncpasswd
Password:
Verify:
Password too long - only the first 8 characters will be used
WHAT1 -
On any given morning, when I"m not quite sure what to tackle first.... there's always:
sudo apt update
Ahh, now I feel like I did something.
"dude! are you hacking!?"
shutup, haven't had coffee yet. -
Rant time. So, me and a few classmates finally finished and handed in a website for a web development class a few days ago. Before we handed it in, we had a meeting with the professor to discuss what we still needed to do.
Us: Are we missing anything?
Prof: Nope. Looks good. Just make sure you have stylus implemented.
Us: Cool, thanks.
We got our grade back today. We didn't do as great as we'd hope, and here's one of the comments that the professor left us:
"You forgot to implement all of the CRUD operations. -4"
WHAT THE **** IS THAT? We asked you if we were missing anything, and you said no. You reminded us about stylus, which we looked at ONCE in a 13-week class, but you failed to remind us that we needed all of the CRUD ops?2 -
Ah the classic "Grau Dunkel 70". I know exactly what hex code that is. Thanks, design team!
Fuck you.8 -
Client told me that they have two workers with very similar names (one letter difference) and customers constantly send emails to the wrong person because of this.
She asked me if there is anything I could do to fix this?
What the hell am I supposed to do? Tell one of them to get their name changed?4 -
if false? if false what? (false is just not defined, but this is the sort of shit I come across in the twig-theme-saas world, makes me angry)5
-
Person: I need documentation for your program.
Me: Program isn't done yet.
Person: We want it anyways.
Me: Everything I document in dev will be drastically different once it's completed.
Person: Yes, we want documentation of what doesn't work so we can refer to it later for help.3 -
[SERIOUS ADVICE NEEDED, PLZ HELP]
I am going to school again for like 4 days from tomorrow (don't ask me why, blame the government) and I feel a bit depressed. I just don't know what I have done in the last 2 years.
What I learned:
- Bunch of stupid facts from devRant
- C# stuffs
- Games are expensive
- Music production
And.... that's it, tbh
I don't really have "PERSONAL PROJECTS" that everyone is bragging about, I just have bunch of empty projects with a cool name but just Program.cs in it.....
I am worried of what to do now.
I just feel I made the wrong choice going with C#.
I just feel I should have went with JS.
With JS, you can do
- React Native + Cordova + Titanium + etc and make native android/ios/wp apps
- The WWW stuffs
- Electron --> Cross platform desktop apps (win/mac/linux)
- UnityScript (deprecated, but whatever) --> Games
So, what I am seeing now is a thick fog in the way to my future + career etc.....
I am stuck rn.
Please help.
Should I continue with my pace and learn more C# and the things I do rn, or change the language and start from scratch, or as a last resort, leave the "make stuff by coding" industry and go to music industry, or just go to the airport and do planespotting and upload in youtube to earn money?
Serious advice please, and no jokes about C# and JS. These languages may suck, but YOUR language may suck more.10 -
Co-worker: At my last job "I was technically lead dev", so don't mind me telling you what to do and criticizing every line of code you write. (He said that in finger quotes. I am also paraphrasing the last part, but you get the gist).
Me: So the fact that we are both level 3 programmers means nothing?
Co-worker: Exactly! See you understand!
Me in my mind: What a prick!
Just a little context there aren't any lead devs at our company, our boss doesn't want any. Also we have been working at this company together for 3 years, and this co-worker just said that to me today, WTF?13 -
Since Parse is shutting down by January 27th, I need to migrate my startup application's entire database to a new platform. What a pain. I'm thinking of doing Firebase...11
-
Wow, very technical and clear documentation:
"While we do not publish the symbol limits for the streaming API, we do monitor for abuse to make sure people aren’t doing anything egregious. Essentially, ask for what you need. Don’t abuse the APIs and you should be fine."
...and, we all know what 'fine' stands for, right?
🤡2 -
So....
I was just told why the company's code has no documentation...
Quote: "It enforces devs to write simpler/better code"
Oh and added bonus - the whole backend is PHP with a bunch of tweaked libraries.3 -
What do you do for a living? I mean, since we're all in devRant, we are all programmers and developers here. But what do you specialise in and which language do you recommend for use in your field?17
-
Hello !
I'm a fresh school dropout (against my will) without any diploma. I've learned programming from self teaching since three years; mostly doing web and apps development with golang, and c#.
I've already done some small projects, helped a lot of people with code, do some freelance and I'm now trying to build a SAAS.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, I'm completely lost for my future. What would you do if you were in this situation ?4 -
Got a new motherboard today, a Asus crosshair vi hero, AM4 for amd ryzen.
Bought is as broken / defective, it supposedly works except 2 ram slots should not get detected.
On a closer look, the story of water-damage didn't seem right.
Disassembled everything and took another look.
😲😨 "Is that solder tin? What the actual fuck?"
*Scratche it with tweezers
*"Supposed solder tin" becomes liquid and moves
😱 "The fuck that's liquid metal"
😵 Who the fuck sprinkles liquid metal all over a board?
😳Ryzen is solderd why the fuck should someone use liquid metal?
What the heck14 -
Got this in Slack from the owner of the firm I work for...
I mean, you already pay me half of the average salary I should be making, but yeah, let me get right on that...
To be fair, I work with this guy because he is a really good guy to work for, is very hands-off (no micro-managing), doesn't expect me to work on the clock or any overtime and lets me make all the calls with our directions in development. Plus he pays me all he can afford, so it's not like he's trying to screw me (he shares the books with me to prove it).
But still, the dude has to realize you get what you pay for. You don't go to McDonalds if you want a gourmet burger...2 -
-- What if JavaScript never existed?
-- What if HTML was a programming language?
-- What if our data online isn't abstract but physical?
-- What if geeks have their own country?
-- What if humans exist and we are the aliens?
-- What if the internet is state-owned?
-- What if we could download food just like every other downloadables?
-- What if my VSCode won't kill me when switched to light theme?
-- What if there was no gender and the word "female" is just an alias for "male"?
-- What if bugs could find and fix themselves?
-- What if there's no need for an account password?
-- What if Linux was owned by Microsoft?
-- **What if I could tell my boss that I'm tired of his fucking job without actually telling my boss? This is the actual what if.**27 -
My friend wants me to post a question on SO coz he cannot as he is currently banned from asking too many questions(dats what he says). Moreover, the question he wants me to ask was already asked by him a month ago. He wants me to ask again as he didn't find a.solution.8
-
Today I learned that for boolean HTML attributes, they are considered true if they're present on the element at all, regardless of their value. And that as a rule, you should specify the empty string("") in value.
This wounds me on a logic level since everywhere else in JS, "" is false.
What.
The.
Fuck.
Seriously. Why?14 -
I made a thing.
I then turned it into a CodeSandbox template so other people could make the thing.
I then turned it into an npm package.
The thing is a cat clock generator.
https://codesandbox.io/embed/...
https://npmjs.com/package/...3 -
Convo with me an my friend today (i purposefully left out my opinions and reactions):
Friend: i want to learn c#
Me: sounds good, but I'd go java if i were you
F: yeah but i want to do unity
M: sounds good, but I'd go with unreal engine if I were you
F: what language is unreal engine?
M: C++, but if you want to make apps, go with unity
F: yeah I want to make an android app
M: sounds good, but I'd try out renderscript if I were you
F: yeah I've used that before
M: oh really? What does it do?
F: I don't know
M: its for gpgpu because android game devs needed better performance
F: yeah I've used that
M: what does gpgpu stand for?
F: umm… i know what gpu stands for
M: okay dude, you didn't use it
F: yes I did, I made a cypher
M: dude, you didn't use it
F: yes I did!
M: what does gpgpu stand for?
F: *left*
*five minutes later*
M: *checks phone*
M: *sees text from friend*
Text from friend: dude it was general purpose gpu1 -
I'm just frustrated. I wanted a simple, statically-typed language that doesn't get in your way and offers GC. I can't find anything "just perfect".
- Go: enforces a style on you, nono.
- Rust: ownership system. I love it, but it's too low level for what I want.
- Scala: seems to have a bunch of useless and bug-prone features.
- Java: I hate how you have to declare and catch exceptions. Good practice, yes, but the code gets bloated with try-catch statements.
- C and C++: Too low level, no GC.
- C#: maybe? idk
I want to make a back-end for an app but I want it to be easy and fast. I need something with a gentle learning curve, not keep fighting the language. I'm between Java and Rust. Java's easier to use. Rust is rust <3, but it's hard, I haven't learned it properly and I just keep fighting the fucking compiler.39 -
What if an enormous asteroid hits the entirety of earth and all our codebase, hardwork, passion, and js frameworks get wiped out?6
-
Last year I wrote a sudoku program which did solve easy sudokus but messed up on harder ones. I had got bored after a bit and forgot about it until today I thought I'd rewrite it using new stuff I've learned since and make it work properly.
So I opened it up and look and I'm like 'WHAT!?' because I don't understand what I wrote. After a bit I start to get the idea and see that it was kind of smart even if long and complicated.
If anything, it shows how much my documentation skills have improved.
Now I just have to work out how to redo it in a way I understand.7 -
Has any of you reached a point that you want to resign from work because of a client?
We are dealing with a client at work that uses the app for prototyping instead of making designers create wireframe, imagine the amount of code to write,edit, remove, write it again and yet there is always something isn't right from the client point of view.
What is even worse backend guys screw the server and I am the one to be blamed for errors: 5xx
I even get blamed for error 400 (bad request) when that request passes tests but out of a sudden server returns 400, when you hit refresh the exact same moment of error and server decides to return data and stop throwing error 400.
I also get blamed for server fails to return data from a search endpoint, and if server throws 403 for a public endpoint.
This isn't a rant or getting out of my system but I need opinions, I've been working on this project for a year, with complete mess from either client or backend team, if any of you is instead of me, what would you do?
I'm not a complete guy either, but that situation is just beyond my abilities to handle.6 -
I label all packages I know are coming as being for a company: Derp Industries. This is from an old in-joke between my friends and I. This tells me whether a package was something I ordered or not from the label (as I often forget I have a package coming.) However, I just got a call from a DHL driver asking me how long we'll be open. I, uh... I told him we close at 8. He said that's perfect, as he has to pick up from the local holding station at 5 and i'm his first stop.
I'm tempted to call back and tell him I'm just a dude living in a trailer...2 -
Remember, the more "cutting edge" and "thousands of clients" a company has is inversely related to the quality of documentation they have on their APIs and software solutions.
I don't give a fuck about your pretty examples, show me which FIELDS can take which VALUES. It's that simple. Instead, I'm wasting your company's and my own time by spamming support for what should be basic questions clearly outlined in the documentation.2 -
I have a local variable that is completely unused, can be of any name or type as long as it's assigned.
Yet, if I delete it the program no longer works.
Huh?8 -
i just saw a macbook pro 13" for the first time in my life irl in a shopping mall
1) what the fck
2) how the fkc can someone work on a screen This small, my fckin dick is bigger than this screen
3) who the fkkk buys such a small screen laptop at a price of $3777 !!!!!!!11 -
People wonder what would happen if internet went down while all it takes is npm repository and the dev world goes to shit xd
https://github.com/npm/cli/...2 -
Me: What if I use navigation props in EF Core, what might go wrong?
*tests API call*
*120 seconds later finally got result*
Me: I better undo my changes and stick with 2 seconds response time O_O -
So, I've been asked to build a tool that scrape's one's Facebook friends and their friends. I (surprisingly) managed to get it done.
I don't know what to feel about this.2 -
The content of this file is called code or algorithm or instructions or coderithm or algode or instrude or algostruction2
-
apple you fucking donkeys you don't even have the specs for iPhone 14 up yet
https://developer.apple.com/library...
you're only what, the highest market cap company in the world?!!?!?2 -
So... I let people around me who see me programing assume what they want to about my abilities, so when they asked if I could hack I decided to play a joke. I said "give me your phone and I'll show you your files and make your phone display a white for a few minutes" (phone was an Android with no lock on it), I do all that as I had an app that closed itself already built for other reasons... They said "cool, now hack that guys Facebook" .... people are gullible...
-
TIL that in JavaScript [1, 2, ] gives you a 2 elements array, while [, 1, 2] gives you a 3 elements array
WTF JavaScript???7 -
The Nintendo switch has been out for a while now. The one thing no one has ever addressed, how are the joy-cons charged?! I can't see any connections in between the console and the controller. And teardowns don't reveal induction coils.7
-
WTF?! I just dunno how to handle this error message.
Are you trying to tell me that 'oops that C written Javascript library just crashed by a WTFCrash within a Java VM'?
Eh What!? I mean what?!
Will someone please catch that? I'll throw it to you...5 -
Found a Junior Dev position for fresh graduates but requires 5+ years of Java programming. Hope I started Java when I was in high school.9
-
I'm not sure what to answer...
Found on SlimSocial for Facebook - Windows 10 Mobile (latest update😜) -
Holy shit this is creepy.
So I just got back from a team event today from a location that was a few hours away and, while we were at the hotel there was a little cardboard box on our breakfast table with an ad on it. The slogan on the ad was “Bada book Bada boom” it was really dumb and I almost forgot about it, but just now I’m listening to pandora on a completely separate network, many hours away from the location and an ad comes on with the SAME SLOGAN for what I assume was the same company.
Now I’m just wondering how they managed to do that.... I really do not believe it was a coincidence considering I have never heard that ad on my pandora before....
This is fucking creepy1 -
Hello.
I am a student of Computer Science Engineering (Bachelor of Technology). I am 3 years into this 4-year course. I am strong in Data structures and Algorithms, and passionate to add more stuff to this list.
I am really done with this University coursework, and want to explore more (specifically, want to do something that is practical, and matters). I, obviously cannot leave the Uni, but I want to make my time at home more productive. Not just to me, but everyone.
But:
1. I don't know where to start.
2. I teach myself everything, and hence, there is much difference between what I know and what people need, and I'm kind of scared of ruining/wasting other's time.
If there is someone out here who has the time out of his/her busy schedule to guide and set me on a path, please do help me. It's getting weird in my head.
Languages I know: C(took a 1-year course), Python, JavaScript [learning JAVA], Oracle, Visual Basic
Things I have done before:
* Developed a fullstack website for Indian Railways (going live in May 2019) [used Python for back end]
I have a sincere need from within to do this, and I am going to learn whatever more I need to, in order to fulfill your requirements. Please just show me WHAT and from WHERE.
Kindly do get back.3 -
JIRA life:
Project leader proceeds to put what is actually two separate issues in the title. I'm already raging. I go to take a look at it.
I read the description - ANOTHER (this makes it three now) totally seperate issue in there.
Just fuck you I'm so sick it i see it over and over again no matter where I go or what project I work on its all the same bullshit.
"wE wAnT tO cLeARlY dEfINe iSsUeS aNd MoVe RaPiDlY"
YEAH THEN F&Q*@#()#$(@)#$ DO YOUR F$*(@#(*&$ JOB!!!! I'M DOING MINE, IN ADDITION TO DOING YOURS, CLEANING UP YOUR ABSOLUTE MESS THAT YOU LEFT!!!!1 -
Here I am again, entertaining the thought of having a day job that doesn't require me to be in front of a computer..7
-
What the fuck is this piece of shit called Ubuntu? I was writing an automation tool on my local PC (ArchLinux) in c++ 17 (c++1z or whatever). Finished it today. Working and compiling so everything is fine. Went to my server, git clone, make.
Okay some errors because I havent installed my networking libs yet. So I installed them.
Make.
Error because I was using a c++ feature only available in c++ 17. But wtf. I told g++ I wanted to compile with c++ 17 support. I mean... On arch it compiled fine. On centOS it at least told me that it doesn't know c++1z (it was some really old centOS). BUT JUST TELLING ME ITS BECAUSE I SUCK AT PROGRAMMING?? THAT IS SO NOT OKAY. MY CODE IS LEGIT ISO C++ 17. FUCK UBUNTU. Installing Arch on my server now because I can't handle this shit anymore...16 -
I woke up this morning thinking "what if Trovalds doesn't GPL-released Linux" and i got like all:
Edit:
*Shooting stars music
:v1 -
I had the Fox Sports Go app on my Roku TV.
A few weeks ago, I noticed it was changed to the Fox Sports with a whole new design.
"Cool deal I like this."
Fast forward to today, I'm looking for a game that I know I have access to and I should be able to see. (I also check the Fox Sports Go website to see it there.)
Turns out, some dumbass fucker thought it'd be a fan-fucking-tastic idea to take a few of the TV channels and put them on their own app, while leaving the others in a separate app.
What the fuck was the point of this? I genuinely want to know what the end goal was, because it's fucking retarded to have two apps to do what one can and DID do.2 -
I once met a guy who said tech guys chose windows over Mac's because windows goes wrong often so it keeps the tech guys in work!
And Mac's hardly ever break so they didn't want their business to use them
He clearly hasn't met tech guys we don't want to be dealing with your fucking problems
It made me furious internally... I said nothing.
Seriously do you think all tech guys in the world joined a union and went 🤔 how can we make sure we have more work ... Fuck off you ponsy twat6 -
When you're looking for the person that wrote over your changes by force pushing and you find out it was your CTO.1
-
Well, I just made a Telegram bot that allows you to slap people with a mention. This is what my life has become.
-
Won an Amazon Echo Show in a Hackathon where we spent most of the time integrating with Google Home.
I don't know what to do with the thing. 🤔3 -
Wonder what tomorrow will bring?
Monday I fuck up by duplicatung some emails.
Today my colleague accidentally sent emails in our test system out which in turn reduplicated the same emails I sent.
My boss is going to love it when he's back in. -
It's a great start of the week when your general manager asks you to get in to touch with a guy to ask about their return merchandise authorization system. And when I reply, sure, what would you like me to accomplish. You get the reply, I don't know, don't bother me with the technical details, they told me it should be super easy.
I don't know what 'it' is, but I'm happy that the man who can hardly use his macbook says its super easy.1 -
Follow up to this:
https://devrant.com/rants/6403741/
So we had today a meeting....
To restart the project, as the current state is garbage.
Turns out the whole team has after two weeks of being left alone with it - kinda like the rant says - zero clue how lucene works, what it does, what its for.
In case anyone of you wonders why some managers are micromanaging biatches, there you have it.
The whole meeting had more "oooh"... "ehm".... "eh"... and other fillwords just to cover the shame of not having any clue at all.
I'm really disappointed that a team of up to 5 people really thought they could pull a stunt of "fake it till you make it". Collectively. Really noone had a real clue.
Now to an interesting discussion: How would you devs reprimand them?
:)
Just curious. Firing is out of option, for several reasons, e.g. law.
Serious answers, I would be really curious. :)
I'm feeling sad for the socks metaphoric in the last rant btw.
Even a cum socket deserves more dignity than them imho.6 -
Yeah ok. I went to bed extra early yesterday but i kept waking up at night and now i am tired anyways but thats ok. i have to go to work now but thats good. yeah this is great. now when the sun is up and i have to go to work, my body feels like it could sleep 10 hours straight but hey, i think this is just what i need right now before work.
-
How the fuck are you supposed to read the Nobody: shit? What does it mean? It doesn't make any fucking sense.19
-
So today's conversation with my co-worker who built our build system...
Me:OS X build server is not building valid installs.
Him:What's the problem?
Me:The KEXT is not rebuild... I think that Jenkins isn't capable of updating the file because of the permissions the script set when you test compiled it manually... Could you please add Jenkins user to sudoers file or something?
Him:Yes of course, but what should I google?
WTF dude? Do you even think yourself? And for some reason no-one has acces to the build servers configs exept for him and he shows up like 3 times a week... -
It's a bit late but what do these specs mean?
The f and the 16/20.
I thought I was getting 20mp but all the camera apps say maz is 16.
And for RAWS, dinner say 13, OpenCamera says 16.9 -
heeeeey!
what libraries, frameworks, third-party stuff, etc. does Python have? I need to know some and I will dive deep on it!8 -
So I'm starting my a mandatory vacation today (for a week) because I can't carry over my remaining days.
What do I find myself doing this morning though? Reading and coding a personal project.1 -
What can I do with my spare Android devices/boards? Could I use the board with a custom OS for a Pi/Arduino analog?
I have 2 tablets that I have no use for. Googling suggestions are pretty simple and nothing that repurposes the hardware.7 -
This comes up when I search on Google 'what is code' lol this looks like a bob the builder remake all about code
-
I'm studying computer security and learning Linux on my free time, yet at my work I spend most my time in MS Excel and PowerPoint... what even is my life1
-
In the middle of the semester, my class and I are going to have a class about threads in Java. The teacher is at his normal days, 10 minutes later he just looks at us and says "Do you want to teach? Do you want me to teach today? You know what? I won't teach today. Let's talk about each other, I want to know you more. Tell about your hobbies, what do you do besides your student life?" 😂
-
A developer just followed me on twitter and their description stated their game had 'FPS quality visuals'... What the fuck does that even mean?1
-
A customer of ours not to say names trains people for infosec certs upon investigating their website I noticed they don't have forward secrecy enabled.
Why? What? Even?
Turn it on you baddies.2 -
I have an onsite technical interview test tomorrow. I have no clue what to expect as I have always done it online.
Should I expect it to be the same system but me just doing the online test in their offices 🙄?
NB: After the test I have an interview with the hiring manager.3 -
co-worker : "hey, have you listened to this cool rocking song"
*Absolutely no idea about what he's talking about*
Me : *internally screaming* no I haven't
CW : well you should check it out, it really blah blah blah
I lost interest mid-way.
Protip : never intimate your colleagues out of their interest -
I always enjoying snacking on some popcorn while people argue so, what are your thoughts:
Comments in your code - good or bad?4 -
Thanks for your email and any other information you have a great time and consideration of this email in the end the game and the rest of my life and death and resurrection I am not able and willing I am not a good time and I have to be able to do the same time and effort and I am going through my resume to the inbox to be in a career change it back on track with you to see the profile photo album and a couple weeks...
When you just click through the autocomplete...4 -
You have all this power your ancestors never ever dreamed about to command every machine that uses a random bunch of characters at your fingertips and you do what?
A dating app!4 -
So my girlfriend was trying to find another word for "whispered" and I just had to screenshot this ad...
Could someone tell me what its trying to actually scam people into?5 -
Basic requirement of every Data Science college internship:
1) 2-3 years of experience... God damn it
2) Research and publications...(yeah right! in 2 years of college in which you taught me how to "work with" C on Turbo-C... I should have god damn publications... Well worked my ass on and have 2, but guess what campus internships says.. " no fucks given man", solve those damn segment tree question first then we will talk)
Its an infinite recursive while loop
FML -
I'm following this fucking tutorial (https://blog.ssdnodes.com/blog/...) and everything goes well, I have docker running, docker compose installed properly, but when I start trying to create the docker-compose.yml and accessing the stupid site using the virtual host domain i set I can't it keep getting "503 Service Temporarily Unavailable" or "502 Bad gateway" what the hell am i doing wrong, I just want to get this working in my VM so i can move it to my damn server and have my own fucking cloud. This damn bullshit is exactly why i went into programming rather than dealing with configuring servers and bullshit like this i know it's outside my level of understanding but I really fucking want my own cloud system but I want it containerized for both isolation and learning purposes.
I have no idea what the hell i'm doing wrong and all the damn articles and links i'm reading aren't helping at all with my level of stupid not allowing me to understand what i'm doing wrong1 -
Me: The client is getting hosting from a different company than we suggested since they require you to pay via bank and she doesn't consider that safe.
Co-worker dude: But aren't banks like the safest way of paying?
Me: Well I guess not in the Filipines (where the client is from)
Dude: .......3 -
I always liked to go through recruitment pipelines, to see what other companies do.
So today I had a meeting with a "talent recruter".
He asked to present myself, my history and what I did in the last three years... In 10 minutes...
So, obviously I did it in 20 mins.
The final response was "not good vibes, and synthesis problems".
WTF? How can I presente a big restructuration, recruting, process, formations, architectures in less thant 15 minutes... Did he wanted that I made drop naming.2 -
Not really developer related, but today, my girlfriend was trying to convince me why taking the stairs was better then the elevator. She decided to not mention the health benefits, not talk about safety risks. The argument she chooses is that "stairs have less steps" like what? Out of all the things you could have said, that is literally the worst argument. I can't think of a single statement less true! Like she could have stated pretty much any fact and that would have been a better argument. I don't understand what's going on in her head sometimes.3
-
Way of wasting time:
generating csv and importing in Open Office Calc, mysteriously what should be ",-," shows as "-0".
I thought some strange fucking time function was responsible of generating a "0" after my "-", until I discovered that for some fucking reason, Open Office Calc decides to add the fucking "0" by itself.
And they say that computer do what they are told to. I just said to import a fucking "-", it's called "Minus". do you fucking understand Calc?
Back to something useful.1 -
Got an interview at a financial tech firm. I asked them what I should wear:
Engineering is a casual environment, so we encourage you to wear whatever makes you feel most comfortable. We are focused on your knowledge and skillset, not your outfit, so please come as you are.
Not a suit, OK... but not sure if I should wear weekend casual or my usual business casual/work clothes...5 -
$ git clone some/shit.git dir
$ cd dir
$ npm install
[literally ages later]
$ du -sh node_modules
441M node_modules
fucking what???!2 -
This indicates what I often ask myself when posting a rant.. but could be used for example for feature requests, too. 😋
The song is quite horribly though.. was kind of a running gag during my studies. A friend reminded me of it a couple of days ago and my mind directly associated it with @dfox 😛3 -
Fuck undocumented shit!
I was wondering how to use this one method of the "interface". Googled the name of the program and the specific method.
Got two results.
From the same page.
It's a comment complaining that this shit is undocumented and doesn't work.
If you build something that others use, please, motherfucking please, document your code.
At least some auto generated javadoc, how hard can it be?
You are using the atlassian suite for everything and you have confluence so use it already! The only documentation that actually exists it about a hundred years old, totally useless and covers about 1% of what your product can do.
I like your product but fuck me sideways your documentation sucks balls! Fuck!
That needed to get out. -
Doing magical things and hacking the world. They don't understand it maybe never will but it's ok because they respect what I do :)
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Started working at a new company recently, like a week later me and my girlfriend decides to move in together at her place(6hour drive from my current work place).
So since im there during my trial period i contact another company looking for a job to have some kind of security in case they Fire my ass since im moving.
End up with a new better offer from another company and when breaking the News for the boss - a possibility to work on distance for my current position..
What to do, stay or take the better offer?1 -
Just discovered qwik and solid... any thoughts?
they both look like react clones :/ but what doesn't these days?
I guess they really were serious when they say its its 10 new frameworks per year 🤡3 -
What exactly is a full-stack developer/engineer? I'm confused.
So, I worked as a freelance webdev for a US company where I redesigned a pretty complicated website from scratch with PHP, mysql, JavaScript, CSS, HTML5. I only mention those because it will important later.
Basically, it's a lame mvc framework I wrote which heavily relied on AJAX and bootstrap modals.
I built from mysql <=> PHP -> UI
I Also built an android app that communicates with the php api
I worked for 4.6 years and they were kind enough to give me the designation "Full Stack Engineer" so I could put that on my resume. Alright, cool.
Then I go to this interview and one interviewer took offense. He told me that, there are 3 tiers of web dev; Database, Backend shit and UI. And I'm not a full-stack engineer. He then asked me if I worked with frameworks like laravel, symphony etc. [I did but not in this project]. I didn't know what to say. The other interviewer tried to help me, "Do you know what it means? Or have you ever worked with React.js or Angular?".
Didn't get the job and I'm so embarrassed and just feel like I'm a fraud. How could I not know what full-stack is? And why did I put it in my resume? Fuck!
Anyway can anyone tell me what "full- stack *" is?
>inb4
>incoherent
>bad engrish
Just fuck my shit up fam5 -
There is so much fuzz about AI and fear of missing out on the leaving AI train, but as a dev I have no clue about where at all to get started!?
What can we developers do with AI?
OK, I can get some code for free. I can use a LLM as a half smart search engine. I can integrate my product with some AI service. I can produce content to teach said things to others...
Nothing new, really, just another API or another search engine.
It is of course possible to start to make some neural networks, but I can't really picture that as a high demand skill, do you?
Maybe at some of the big companies, but for an average client?
Does anyone know what kind of knowledge of AI that a developer should really learn?
Especially something a client would be interested in?
Here is a potato for scale:6 -
It's gonna fucking long day, after work I have to attend the convocation rehearsal tomorrow and the day after i.e. Saturday it is actually convocation (graduation day). I had 12 hours of sleep in the last 3 days and it is catching up with me now.
I'm gonna slack today and take an off on Friday1 -
What is everyone's opinion on companies/organisations 'too big to fail'...?
I was just pondering on how 'just Google it' has become so 'natural' as a way of saying search the Internet. The more I think about it, the less I like it.
I know the chances of them failing/crumbling are neary zero (hence the name) but if an org, Ie Alphabet, made some shit decisions and bankrupted their company, what would happen then? Any ideas? I don't mean in terms of social fallout, economic etc.
I mean in terms of network infrastructure, them being such a central part of 'the web', all their Dns services, their backbone links, Google drive, Google fiber etc. What would happen to all user data? Just be destroyed?
I've never 'seen' a large tech company collapse, but just wander as to how that process would work for such a huge organisation, and the literal mountains of data they have which will need destroying or relocating.
Inb4 watch Mr robot hurrr5 -
Yesterday our company CEO gave a presentation on the plan for our company's growth.
Let's just say that I'm not too sure that the goals he's set might not be met because I know the way we work.
But if those goals are met, it'll be a huge hit. Provided all the stars align and the PMs decide to do things right for once.
Can't decide what to do in terms of asking for those better projects that have been mentioned or just lay low and stay sad because the work that I'm getting sucks (no actual development just site support for the past 6 months).2 -
So, I've just been offered two jobs that are basically the same. It is impossible to do both. What do I do?15
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Doing some SendGrid integration with suppressions via their API. I changed around a bit of my own code today because what I had before wasn't working well. Something I didn't touch suddenly stopped working. The response body from their one API endpoint no longer matches what their docs say and I swear it did yesterday. So I've been swearing thinking I broke something for the last four hours.4
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What i'll minded cocksucker decided it was a good idea to let the web application cache MySQL login credentials..3
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There's a time when I wrote a programme in Elixir which GitHub mistakenly thought my programme is in Ruby...2
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Am I the only one that didn't the use of not after a something incredibly triggering?
Eg. "Ask not what..."
I know the meaning but I interpret it as "ask how(?) [ inverse of what]... "2 -
A lot of the skills I use at work are actually learned on my own time. And a lot of the time, it feels like I trying to drag the team forward but everyone else does things that drag them, and thus me as well, backwards.
There's always work but most of it is low value and there's just less and less time to make things better because no one else has any opinion of how things should be...
Maybe I should just give up... Again....
I really need to find a better job or at least one without so much technical debt.
Feels like actually my PM is exactly like the name of in Phoenix Project... But I guess he'll never take any meaningful action.
But when I'm not sure what that is... Guess it really is hiring the right people and doing things right from the start, it at least fixing them immediately.
**END internal monologue and summary** -
Been watching lots of videos about Docker lately, yet I still can't wrap my head around it. Especially that I'm just new to web development.11
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I just felt like saying as I'm not sure how prevalent this is but the reason I got into computing and programming is essentially this, I want to change the world and make a better society and to quite frank I honestly believe that what you make and it's impact on people is far more important that your personal character5
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Ooh this project.. So I was put in charge of creating new pages, and general maintenance as the site was already built by a previous dev on the team before i joined the company. I take a look at the design, fairly strange forward quick analysis most of it bootstrapable, some custom code is needed for some parts so no issues there.
Looks at the code, only the bootstrap grid system is being used, the rest is custom code, an additional 9K lines of CSS and 526 lines of JS. What the hell is this.2 -
A register machine with strings and hashmaps as the only data types and no stack. You have to make one from a linked list of hashmaps.1
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Making CD-Extra discs, because apparently some people still use ye-olde CD players and others want MP3s.
What a magical world I live in. -
Hope you guys dont mind me asking this here. Does anyone know what library this datetimepicker is using?2
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Gradle gradle gradle
You're made out of C
Gradle gradle gradle
The community doesn't seem to appreciate thee
Gradle gradle gradle
A blowjob is what comes after coffee
What the fuck is gradle?
RoadToPleb2 -
I'm building a website with Django just to learn, so far I have login/sign up and even a chat I cloned from github, I don't know what else to do with it, any ideas?4
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A question for all of you. What is the best way in CS to earn enough money for a comfortable life standard and where can people go for this?3
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When you're agreed with prototyping sdlc then suddenly it became waterfall model.
"I'm thinking there's some lack of additional features that might be needed by our clie-"
"NO! CAN THE SOFTWARE WORK? WE NEED TO RELEASE TOMORROW "
"Yes it works ok deliver tomorrow"
Fucking cheesedick hobo here comes another deployment Friday that tops another nice fucking shit on your degenerative brain to come up with such a plan -
Why is laravel quickstart guide's default files are so fundamentally different from what I got, when I run 'laravel new myApp'? It's so frustating!3
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It can't be as simple as comparing geocoded locations. It just can't be there has to be other factors as well I have data for and can use as well. It cant be this easy what the hell am I missing
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When I run this Python code on Dcoder, they shows that they are using Python 3.6.8, and not 3.7.1 as they claim. This is why I cannot use dataclasses.
(And yes, I am having an idea about a template engine)1 -
!rant
I got an old laptop from my girlfriend that I can use for whatever I want.
As a programmer and computer nerd you can't deny that you wouldn't do anything with it, but what to do?
I want to use it for something, but can't figure out what. Maybe you have some ideas :D7 -
Just found a production project that has good portion of it's Composer dependency tree listed in .gitmodules.
Deployment builds are prepared with --recursive clone.
Why. -
Okay so I calming down now. All is well. Great now I have iphostor syndrome! What will come tomorrow?! I can't wait... 26s till I can rant. now
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Humans only live for eighty years (average).
What percentage are you the way through yours?
You must be knackered 🧓9