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A client asked if we could change their nameservers to wix's ones.
"we want to move to wix because one of my best friends can create a professional site there"
My eyes are bleeding and I think I just spontaneously got aids AND cancer at the same time.
Send help. Please.30 -
Dear fellow developer,
You are not alone. No matter what situation you have been, you are in, you might be, there definitely are people who can share your pain and joy on similar wave length. Here at devrant.
Introvert?
Poor?
Alone?
Odd one out?
Trouble studying?
Family issues?
Debts?
Hate workplace?
Bad teacher?
Depression?
Laziness?
Forever alone?
Struggling?
Full of regrets?
Lost something?
Lost someone?
Lost?
You name it. All of us may not understand, sure. But there definitely will always be more than one person who will totally know what you are trying to say. Here at devrant only.
So whatever you are in, wherever you are and however you feel, just rant it out. 😄 And remember that we are one tap away from you.
For that devrant creators and most of all each and everyone of you have my eternal thank.72 -
The CEO asks God:
"God, how much time do you need to create the earth?"
God: "uh, 10 billion years I think"
CEO: " You have only 7 days. Well 6, the last one is to fix everything gone wrong after deploying"
And here we are6 -
We are required to say “leaving for the day” when we leave office. (On slack)
One developer decided to quit and just said “leaving “ and we realised the next day what he meant when he did not show up 😂😂😂7 -
Client just informed our support that they solved their own forgotten password problem by clicking the "forgot password" button in our app. They say they are now awaiting the email with the password recovery details.
One problem: we don't have a forgot password button in our app.9 -
Manager: I read an article today
Dev: oh here we go….
Manager: We must pivot to only functional programming, which means only using functions instead of classes
Dev: Actually functional programming is a bit more nuanced tha—
Manager: Any use of classes going forward is not allowed. Everything must use functions! Classes are an outdated way of programming, using classes is why we continue to miss our deadlines. Functional programming is lean, classes are waterfall.
Dev: What about the libraries we use? Many of those use classes
Manager: Wrap them in a function then, that way they are pure which is one of the requirements of functional programming. You would know that if you spent as much personal time as I do keeping up with the times.34 -
In our office, everyone is placed so that we have a wall behind us. Initially, there was enough room behind us so that we can walk just fine.
Everything was fine till our manager didn't start making us some random visits and standing behind us just looking at our screens and making us feel unpleasant.
So one day we moved the tables so there is almost no room behind us. And we are aligned in a row with no space between the tables. Now if the manager decided to do it again he would have to struggle his way behind us.
Few days passed by and our manager finally showed he saw what we did, didn't say anything. It was clear that he wasn't happy about it. He tried to lean himself over the monitors to take a look but that was just not so as "good" as standing behind us...
A time passed and one day when we came to work we saw the tables moved forward some 15-20cm just enough to be able to move behind. Almost immediately we pulled them back as they were before.
We moved back and forward already few times and are currently playing cat and mouse with our manager.
Noone is saying anything just the tables are moving every 2-3 days or so. Let's see who is going to give up first hahaha13 -
Client: "We are extremely satisfied with your great work for almost three years now and we are super thrilled to work with you in the future and benefit from your amazing work."
Dev: *makes one tiny little mistake*
Client: "Oh burn in hell you cock sucking piece of shit!"4 -
We are transferring our infrastructure to Google cloud and Docker. Last week one of our frontend developers tell me:
But it works without Docker!
9 -
Why do people (Some devs too...) bloody hell think that devs have Hard time fixing the Semi Colon issue, we have a lot of other issues to figure out, like the Structure of Data, Code Fragmentation, API Creation, Invalid Data Handling, Injection Prevention. But no, since we are developers, we are having sleepless nights because of one fucking semicolon? FUCKING NO, it hardly takes 30 seconds to figure out that there is a missing semi-colon. Really People, stop the ; thing!10
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Oh you're a frontend guy? Good, we need one of those.
Oh you're a backend guy too? Good, we need one of those.
Oh you're a security guy too? Good, we need one of those.
Oh you're a devops guy too? Good, we need one of those.
Oh you're a QA guy too? Good, we need one of those.
Oh you're an SEO guy too? Good, we need one of those.
"Well, sorry to say fullStackCraft, but we found your cloud architecture skills just a little too lacking for this position. We really need someone who can do frontend, backend, security audits, QA assessments, SEO, AND build scaling cloud architecture. Oh and while you're at it, can you turn fucking water into gold? We need that at our company too. You didn't get the position, but it'd be great if you could refer us to someone who is very advanced in fucking alchemy. Thanks!"
Absolutely toxic the way software people are treated I swear. The money may be the only good thing that is left.19 -
Since I started reading devRant the productivity of our team dropped a 20%(we are 3 people). Yesterday one of my teammates asked me what was going on and I showed him devRant.
I don’t think we will survive next split.1 -
So my company is hiring only amateur developers, Including me.So that they can save on budget . So we have no one to guide us and ambitious deadlines are set .10
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*In teams meeting with client*
Manager: Yes we can do all of that and it will be actioned very quickly. We will make all of these feature requests top priority. We will set aside everything we are currently working on in order to get this done!
Dev: ...Are you writing any of this down?
Manager: I don't need to, I always remember everything!
Dev: Just so you are aware, I'm not writing anything down. You're going to need to create a ticket with requirements spelled out for each one of these promises you're making otherwise they won't get actioned by the team.
Manager: I know that!
Dev: ...
*Later that day*
Ticket Title: Action client feature requests TOP PRIORITY!!!
Ticket Description: *empty*
Dev: ...13 -
Best "error" I've ever seen today.
We have a very large database with millions of people, some of those records are duplicates. So I had a long project to write something that would automatically merge duplicate records while allowing employees to review them. Today we had a duplicate show up in the list which should not have.
Same name (apart from one letter), address, employee ID (off by 1 number), same manager, title, phone number, birthdate. But we figured out it wasn't the same person and therefore wasn't a good match.
Turns out they are twin sisters who live together and we're hired by the same manager for the same position at the same time. What are the odds...12 -
Yesterday, the whole dev team went out to lunch and we ate a lot and we drank a lot until we all got drunk! Since we are paid for the number of hours we work, we all decided to go back to the office and work.
WE WERE DRUNK WORKING! Drunk coding ftw
Result: The server is down right now because someone fucked it up and I think i ruined my code yesterday because I wasn't really myself. The whole team was crazy as fuck. One of us just came back from Poland so we were drunk and high from all the polish chocolate we ate.
I hope they fix the server so I can check what kind of bullshit the drunken me did yesterday o.O8 -
Manager: As you all know I called this meeting to discuss what we will do with all of the extra resources if we are done early. I was thinking a start a new ap—
Dev: We are not going to be done early. There are two weeks left and we are way behind schedule.
Manager: Don’t be so pessimistic! You never know when or how fast tickets will be completed.
Dev: Yes I do…I’m the one doing them4 -
managers: We're all aligned! Let's work as a team and get this started!
devs: ok...
managers and devs meeting to discuss next features: * canceled by managers *
managers: (word for word, can't make this shit up) we cancelled the meeting, we will define the roadmap for everyone
> WE will define the roadmap for EVERYONE
devs: uh wtf???
one hour later, managers: guys we are defining the roadmap can we have a call to discuss?
fucking asshat, insolent, disrespectful pieces of shit3 -
Just discovered that we are loading 200k for a custom font on one of our platforms...
200k FOR A FUCKING FONT?!? FOR REAL??? ITS NOT EVEN FUCKING DIFFERENT ON SIGHT!
So I sarcastically asked why the fuck are we using it and my coworker said its because the designer designed (duh) the layout this way...
Look... Usually I'm a quiet person and I don't rant in real life but this time I could not restrain myself.15 -
Boss: Hey, remember that app you made that was supposed to be purely for demonstration purposes?
Me: The one that we hard coded to get done in a week? Yea, why?
Boss: Here are some changes we need done for the next meeting.
Me:...1 -
One of our internal customers to my team: "We need this new feature to be implemented as soon as possible! It's super urgent!! Work on it asap!! PEOPLE ARE DYING!!"
Us: "Ok, we'll prioritize this feature and deliver it as soon as we can"
Them: "Is it ready yet?"
Them: "Is it ready yet?"
Them: "Is it ready yet?"
Them: "Is it ready yet?"
... One month later ...
Them: "Is it ready yet?"
Us: "We're done! We implemented everything as promised! Please give us your credentials so that we can whitelist you and you can start using the new service"
Them: "Okay, we will get back to you"
... Two months have passed since then and still not a single word from them. I'm starting to wonder: are they still alive? 🤔4 -
There is power cut in my college area sometimes...
Once we were in computer lab, when power cut occurred. So fan, tubelights went off.
I heard one girl ask her friend "how are laptops on?"
That moment.... Only I know how I controlled my laugh....1 -
!dev related
Wife is not pregnant......
.....we have been trying to...STAY LIKE THAT FOR A WHILE NOW and after a big scare I was really worried :v we have one kid already and that Is how we plan to stay until I start my business.
These are the best news I've had all month.
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay24 -
Fuck that fucking company three way while dozens of homeless HIV crack junkies puke and shit their diarrhea on the three bosses!
I can't put it in words how stupid they are!
Let me try to tell you the latest story while I try not to get multiple strokes.
Backstory: We are three devs, all with a TCCI certification. One has been working for us for almost a year, the other one has been working for us since one and a half year. Both are good friends of mine, btw. I have been working there for almost three years.
Fortunately, I am allowed to work on a reasonable computer. The other devs work on PC's with Windows 7 and 8!
One has just 400 MB space left on his drive and has to delete every month some shit because he does not want to be able to call up websites anymore... How awful?!
The PC of the other great Dev Crashes three to six times a day and needs about 30 minutes to start up!
We can be so productive, but...
We told that in February one of our bosses and asked him to buy new hardware. His answer: yes, of course, I understand that, it's my turn (he always says that "ich bin da dran")
We got a new colleague in the middle of this fucking month. She is responsible for conception.
She works on an old notebook, but today she gets a fucking new PC to work on while the devs are trying to weld with a sparkler! Better hardware than every other Dev PC!!!
Guess what? She is the daughter of a friend of one of our bosses!
We are the only devs at this company.
Fuck that fucking company! Fuck that fucking bosses!
I think we don't go to work for that fucking company anymore!6 -
When I joined my team in august as a junior/trainee, we were 6 developers.
Now we are 4 left in the team.
By the end of june, we are 1.. I mean its me, myself and I.
Wtf did I do!? My code isnt that spaghetti. I think...
But its np, just me with a 20 years old database, 7 legacy systems and a new one planned.
Atleast my boss believes in me keeping this shit floating.11 -
I hope computing heavens have:
-One brand of hardware
-One OS
-One browser
-No closed source software
-No ads
-One monitor aspect ratio
-One fucking programming language with a fucking big standard library.
-Phones are just the same exactly the same OS as in computer, not stupid adaptations.
-All pages are only HTML/CSS, without JS.
-Due there is one browser and one OS, when you need a dynamic page, you can display a desktop app in the browser downloading its binary.
-There are one fucking brand on printer with standard drivers which are included in the OS.
We are so far from heaven15 -
People say programmers are no fun!! But they don't know the truth.
We have big Ass container of emotions almost ready to explode anytime. We are spending too much time in debugging stuff one after another that having a free time is just a hoax to us, even when we came back home for sleep, it's only to dream about solution. We would be happy with debugging the error that is not letting us sleep for weeks.4 -
WannaCry hit one of our server and the latest backup we had was from May 2017. You know who got blamed? Developers. I repeatedly told the General Manager that SysAdmin are the once who should be doing backups, Server updates and management as per their job description yet we got blamed for it.
I don't know what the fuck is going in this world.12 -
"Make us a one-page website for our new company!"
I build the site, to their exact specifications and show it to them
"There's only one page"
"You only asked for one page."
"No, we didn't"
I show them the email they sent me, asking for a one-page site
"Wow, you suck, we are finding another developer!"5 -
"We are from <Company Name> and wanted to reach out to you in regards to a management level software position, we liked bla bla bla about your resumee and would like to discuss some options with you"
Me: "oh interesting! I just worked with your company last week helping one of our departments implement one of your solutions into their area"
Recruiter: "We know :D"
I am kinda wondering if this is considered poaching7 -
## 4 years ago:
- Principal Architect: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: IDK, let's test it!
*we run tests*
- Perf team: results are OK, but we're exhausting Burst IO capacity, effectively hard-limiting number of tests we can run per day
- PArch: ahhh, I see. Then Gp2 is a no-go.
## 3 years ago
*PArch quits. New one is hired*
- PArch2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- PArch2: I see. Let's test it again anyway
- Perf team: *wtf???*
*we run the same tests, we get the same results*
- PArch2: I see, so GP2 is a no-go.
- Perf team: *you think....? How did that thought never cross our minds, we wonder...*
## 2 years ago
*new DBA is hired*
- DBA2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- Perf team: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- PArch2: We've already tested that a while ago, results were THIS and THAT
- DBA2: I see. Let's test it anyways. I've read somewhere that GP2 might be a better bet
- PArch2: you might be right, let's do that
- Perf team: *wtf???*
*we run the same tests, we get the same results*
- DBA2: I see, so GP2 is a no-go.
- Perf team: *you think....? How did that thought never cross our minds, we wonder...*
## 1 year ago
*DBA manager left; new one was hired*
- MGMT_dba2: We are using IO1 storage type. What if we used GP2?
- ........
Should we even bother bringing up the history.....?
11 -
A few months back, me and my friends built our own Web Dev firm. I'm the one who talk to clients, customers, etc. and these have been the most ridiculous messages I received from them:
1. I don't like it, but I don't know why?
2. I have an idea! Can we change the design?
3. We want something with more of a `wow` factor.
4. Can't you just copy their logo?
5. But we are also a startup. You must understand that we can't pay the full price.
6. So do you have the file open and ready to edit/
7. Can't you just copy and paste it in?
8. We don't have much of a budget but there are plenty of projects coming your way.
These are just a few of the huckleberryfuck our clients sent. I'm not sure if I can handle them anymore.5 -
Product team having a proof of concept demo with client:
Sales to client: "Just for the record, we are not selling this to a rival company. Because we really want this technology exclusive to you"
Me (thinking to myself): "Oh really? We just had a demo with them last 2 weeks"
One of the core values of our company is Integrity, and I am not just seeing it. -
PM: Ok Android, i've reviewed the latest build, you are good to release. Waiting on iOS's build to test.
Me: ... are we not holding all builds until we hear back from backend about that bug?, as we likely have to change something on our side?
PM: Which bug?
Me: ... the only one we discussed yesterday in the team meeting.
PM: How many customers is it affecting?
Me: that we know of, one ... the CEO of our company
PM: oh that one, yeah were not doing that anymore.
Me: WHAT? i've been waiting all day / night to hear back. Why are we not doing this?
PM: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ... Everything is too messy at the minute anyway, the release plan is changing every day. Need to keep it back in line.
Me: ... the plan has changed exactly once. We had a plan at the start of last week for the last release, we changed it YESTERDAY to include 2 critical bug fixes. The only issue with the plan changing is nobody telling us these aren't bugs anymore
PM: We can discuss tomorrow in the team meeting.
CEO: oh hey guys, yeah we pulled that bug fix. Its not really a bug, more like a missing feature. No way it will get done before xmas. Going to live with the way it works for now and fix it properly next year.
Me: Ok, fair enough, but we really need to be told these decisions.
CEO: sure, sorry, didn't think anyone was blocked by this. What was the blocker?
Me: ..... you asked me yesterday to get this bug fix in the build ... you asked for the final build to be made today so we can go through the app store review. As we all discussed yesterday, today is kind of the last day we can really do this.
CEO: ok, its late, we can discuss this tomorrow in the team meeting.
Me: ..... ..... ..... ..... sure7 -
PhD application saga:
So, the recommenders showed up. And one by one, the letters are rolling in. I am a little hopeful.
And also anxious since there's a mere 4% acceptance rate.
But now, we shall wait...
🐀
*Goes into hiding to anxiously binge-eat*15 -
The sales and business team at my office really look down at the devs. Just because we don't dress in fancy suits doesn't mean we are any less important that those asshats.
In fact we are probably a hell of a lot more useful since they cant land any sales since they barely have any idea what they are selling and the company is rapidly going under.
To give you an idea :
We recently changed office and one of them asked if they had had to be in the same workspace as the developers again?
Why do we need them?
Cant we outsource their jobs ?
Some of them dont even answer when you bid them good morning
And one douche bag even brought his bluetooth radio and refuses to use headphones , he keeps playing shitty music and disturbing us.
The company is kinda fractured and there is poor chain of command, so there is little we can do, telling dev management is fruitless he has no authority over the guy
And the business manager simply said oh you dont like good music then walked off.10 -
one of our engineers accidentally deleted our production database and our clients didn't even notice. that's when we knew they are not using our product.2
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Company email sent around last night that 'for security' we need to use the latest software, fine. But we are also told only to develop in Edge as it's the newest and most secure browser, therefore is the only one we can use. There no way I'm using Edge to develop.
Fuck you, Mr Consultant, you've taken the company for a ride.
devRant_swear_count++;4 -
SMM: Can you chat over the phone? Just want to make sure we are on the same page! I am not great with web lingo!
Me: Sure.
Me, internally: You're a social media manager. That's literally your one fucking job.3 -
Devs in our country are people who will allways have a job. Because companies here need us more than we need them. That's why we have 2x(jr-mid), 3x, 4x (mid), 5x+ (sr) average earnings country-wide.
Job is good, perks are nice, hardware is awesome (idk when was the last time I worked with anything weaker than i7), internet is brilliant (one of the best in the world; I think we have recently lost the "best internet in the world" title recently to some other country). Companies are fighting over us, offering better salaries, better terms. I was even bold enough to list my terms in LinkedIn's summary section and still I am getting offers :D
Devs' life is awesome here :)8 -
Dev: Hi Guys, we've noticed on crashlytics that one of your screens has a small crash. Can you look?
Me: Ok we had a look, and it looks to us to be a memory leak issue on most of the other screens. Homepage, Search, Product page etc. all seem to have sizeable memory leaks. We have a few crashes on our screens saying iPhone 11's (which have 4gb of ram) are crashing with only 1% of ram left.
What we think is happening is that we have weak references to avoid circular dependencies. Our weak references are most likely the only things the system would be able to free up, resulting in our UI not being able to contact the controller, breaking everything. Because of the custom libraries you built that we have to use, we can't really catch this.
Theres not really a lot we can do. We are following apples recommendations to avoid circular dependencies and memory leaks. The instruments say our screens are behaving fine. I think you guys will have to fix the leaks. Sorry.
Dev 1: hhhmm, what if you create a circular dependency? Then the UI won't loose any of the data.
Dev 2: Have you tried looking at our analytics to understand how the user is getting to your screens?
=================================
I've been sitting here for 15 minutes trying to figure out how to respond before they come online. I am fucking horrified by those responses to "every one of your screens have memory leaks"2 -
- There are no stupid questions. Please feel free to ask.
- You don't have to memorize, but try to understand.
- Document so you never have to remember.
- Teach so you will master and never forget.
- Even if we have different responsibilities do not ping pong issues because overall the client only sees one company name so we work as one.
- Do not disturb while on vacation leave unless it's life or death.
- Relax, sleep and have a happy weekend. -
As a Java guy starting to learn about JavaScript I have one question.
WHY ARE THERE 20,000 VERSIONS OF JAVASCRIPT???! WHAT MAD GOD APPROVED OF THIS AND HOW DO WE KILL HIM?
...I don't actually think it's that bad of a language though. :^)13 -
Teacher: what is 1 + 1?
kid : I don't know
Teacher: Ok! you have one man and one women, how many are there?
Kid: Three.
Teacher: how?
Kid: There was my mom and dad, when they add up we become three.
Teacher: %(;:)--,^$2 -
3 days, 3 fucking days into my annual leave and shit hits the fan right before Xmas weekend 🤯
Just one fucking week off seems too much ask these days let alone a few weeks, we are seriously talking about that pay check when I get back people 🤬2 -
This is one from i was an intern
Me: writes some logic, using
for(String s : something)
Senior: holds a 30 minute talk on why short loops are bad and we should always use the traditional one
Me: ok retard
Me: havent used traditional loops ever since then8 -
How my year has gone so far...
Management: Bobby, we are replacing your old hammer.
Me: Ok cool.
Management: Well actually there's so much going on...here is a wrench instead.
Me: But, this isn't a hammer.
Management: Yes we are aware but we are busy and cannot buy a hammer for a several more months.
Me: How the fuck am I suppose to hammer nails with this?
Management: Oh gosh you are right. That sounds difficult. We will grind down one side of it so you have a flat surface to hammer in those nails.
Management: Oh and by the way, those nails are super important so don't screw anything up.12 -
Manager: We have a new equity survey from HR that is ABSOLUTELY MANDATORY. Anyone who doesn’t fill it out will be severely reprimanded for being against diversity in the workplace. We need this data in order to ensure we have the ABSOLUTELY EXACT ratio of EVERY minority so that we can show the people that we do not discriminate against ANYBODY for ANYTHING. One of the problems with hiring new people is that most people we want to hire turn out to be white and we are absolutely not allowed to hire any more white people because we are over the quota for white people. Now there’s a loophole to this, if that white person belongs to some sub-minority like they are muslim or gay or something like that it’s totally cool and we can show people we don’t discriminate on these things when making employment decisions!
Dev: That’s…not wh—
Mandatory Survey: Please select your sexual preferences and/or religion from the dropdown below.
Dev: jesus christ.16 -
We all have that one coding-buddy who we consult in case we are stuck...
We all have that one coding-buddy who knows nothing about coding5 -
Italian schools are by far the worst in the world.
I'm in a IT oriented school, where we should learn to code.
We spent the first year writing in Word and "programming" in Excel.
In the second year we started learning Visual Basic, a total waste of time.
In the third year we finally got rid of most of the useless subjects we had and started learning C++.
Sadly we had a teacher who wasn't able to properly speak and teach to students who never really programmed.
We didn't even know what a class was at the end of the year.
In the fourth year, the current one, we didn't have a teacher for the first 3 months.
Now we are learning Java, but just the basics.
Oh, we're also "learning" HTML (not 5) and JavaScript.
Next year, the last one, we will do PHP and SQL.
Maybe also C#, the most pointless programming language in the world.
What a beautiful country.
22 -
Pour one out for our last VMS/Alpha computers heading to the great bit bucket in the sky.
Was decent hardware in it's day, 20 years ago, but we now run EC2 instances that are faster. 🙃
14 -
"yes, we are looking for frontend interns from your place of education!"
One week later:
"Sorry, but we would like someone with more real-life experience"
How do you expect me to get experience!?2 -
Highschool culture...
Here in Italy we run a few exam simulation in order to prepare for finals in June.
One of the two categories of simulations, one of which revolves around the core subjects of our technical course which in my case is CompSci and Networking.
"Sounds good!" one would say.
And I'd agree, if only our CompSci professor graded solutions in a sensate manner.
If one does not exactly copy and paste the solutions we repated in class 100 times (which, by the way, are all EXACTLY the same solution but with different data in diagrams and other sections), the grade WILL be insufficient: no but's or why's.
This is only one of the prime examples of what school revolves around. Sometimes it just feels like we are trained to be sheeps in a world of wolves. Rinse and repeat over and over. No technical competency is (almost) ever valued or allowed to be expressed and is often looked down upon by old school professors who literally care about everything but their subject, students and school in general.
I'm glad this is almost over, and that greener pastures are ahead :)8 -
Accountant: Can we just get one big Excel file with all the transactions instead of separate reports that are filled out specifically for each dorm?
Me: Hell yes you can.3 -
Week till deadline
PO: are we going to have feature xyz ?
Me: it wasn't in the original spec, we'll put it in the next spec.
PO: but we made a new spec for this fase yesterday and it is in that one.
Me: you can't do that you signed off the original spec before development started
Po: but we've signed this one off too
Me: ...6 -
We are 5 people on the team. And I am the only one who came to the office today. Love is definitely in the air.6
-
DEAR CTOs, PLEASE ASK THE DEVELOPER OF THE SOFTWARE WHICH YOU ARE PLANNING TO BUY IN WHAT LANGUAGE AND WHAT VERSION THEY ARE WRITTEN IN.
Background: I worked a LONG time for a software company which developed a BIG crm software suite for a very niche sector. The softwary company was quite successfull and got many customers, even big companies bought our software. The thing is: The software is written in Ruby 1.8.7 and Rails 2. Even some customer servers are running debian squeeze... Yes, this setup is still in production use in 2022. (Rails 7 is the current version). I really don't get it why no one asked for the specific setup, they just bought it. We always told our boss, that we need time to upgrade. But he told every time, no one pays for an tech upgrade... So there it is, many TBs of customer data are in systems which are totally old, not updated and with possibly security issues.9 -
It's not always true that degree holders hate self-taught developers. Sometimes, it's the other way around. When somebody mentions he gained a cs degree, he sometimes gets hate, too, hearing "degrees are useless! yadayada..." like it's a sin to have one. We should never stop learning whether we have a degree or not, and we should stop this hate and divided culture.18
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The secretaries at my university had to scan documents in the masters students lab. So one day, when the lab was empty save one of our secretaries, I remote into my machine and write a text to speech app and have the computer announce "Hello Selma, you really know how to push my buttons"
It took a while, but we are friends again :D -
We are taking over an Android application source code from an external company to continue development in-house...
I present to you floateger:
(one of many crimes the previous developer has commited)
15 -
Our project schedule is quite full at the moment, we are basically at the limit for the next three months.
In comes one of our sales people: "Hey, can we squeeze in a little project, nothing fancy just a very basic static web page." (No question mark there, it was not a question...)
I say no, we are full, the deadline is to tight (3 weeks), can't do it.
In comes boss: "Sure you can, just push everything else back." (We won't change deadlines, what he actually means is for us to do unpaid overtime for two months so he can barocke make a few thousand extra bucks...)
So I cave and allow it. It were just 4 hours of work, we can squeeze it in, maybe do a little less R&D this month.
Next day, the project scope changed, suddenly we are not taking about 4 hours but 80. Sure, we can squeeze two extra weeks into the month.
That is when I realized, I don't hate my work, just my work environment.4 -
Dev: The requirement is not clear. This seems to be a general usecase which you are thinking we might need but we won't actually need it.
Manager: You have to do it. This is the requirement. No other option. Don't ask any questions.
...... One week later....
Manager: Why is the team not open to me?1 -
So one of our clients is changing the IPs of his systems (3 servers and one VPN).
It was scheduled that we should support them yesterday. They have tried to change the IPs yesterday for almost 16 hours, don't know they have done in all of that time.
Today I woke up at 8AM on a Sunday (in weekends I just want to sleep!!!!) to continue and hope that we finish fast.
BUT NO! THE fucking VPN IS NOT WORKING!! We are trying to do this over Team FUCKIN VIewer.
But guess what... they cannot either connect to the new IPs from their local systems.1 -
Facebook you little piece of shit.
We have a page setup for a band since apparently this is what one does these days. But oh boy is facebook annoying. Can you please stop sending me 100 notifications a day about fking post boosting?! What the fuck. We are students we don't have money for this shit. fk off! <.<12 -
Programmer: We really have to refactor the codebase!
Director: That's not important. Do you think our customer would care what it looks like under the hood if we are selling cars?
One year after...
VP: We need to build a new platform for flexibility!
Director: Let's rewrite!1 -
We all know that being distracted while coding is frustrating. That's why me and my teammates (we are 3) we "protect" each other while on "full dev mode" - meaning anyone coming to disturb one of us while in that state, the other push him/her away.
The most productive 2 weeks of my life 😂😂1 -
"The new platform is launching tomorrow. Get the most perfect first time user experience and registration flow. Don't leave until it's done."
Exactly one year later: "We are finally about to launch the new platform"1 -
Partner of ours claimed they are going to update their api. No breakage. My hopes were low and they did not disappoint.
Soon after the new version of their api went live, of course, loads of breakage. And the email contact with them is really fun.
Me: "Hello, since your update we get the issue A. Here's the complete communication."
Them: "We did not change the existing behavior. You are doing X wrong. Repeat that one call during the step and you should be fine."
Me: "Thank you, if I repeat the call, it does indeed work, albeit slower, since we are now repeating calls. Furthermore, our application was consuming your api for years and we did not change anything. So why is that step necessary now? Only after your update do our logs show errors from your API. And by the way, we now also have a issue with B. Why is that?"
Them: "Oh that's because your query the endpoint with "Fnord", try "Baz".
Me: "Yes, I do know that we query it with "Fnord" as that is what a previous endpoint of yours is responding to us. Why are we getting "Fnord"? What request do I have to make to get a "Baz" back?"
It feels like a game of wackamole. Squash one issue, ten more will pop up. I am one step away from becoming active-aggressive.3 -
After looking at @linuxxx and @AlexDeLarge 's rants with the face reveal, maybe we ought to do one of the team behind the masterpiece, @trogus and @dfox face reveal.
IF they are comfortable with it.
Or maybe do it on a special occasion. Like an anniversary or something?14 -
Wow I can't believe how well this infographic nailed it.... I feel a bit naked like it read my soul...😮
Src: http://carlcheo.com/what-is-program...
5 -
I've been a part of this industry for over two decades, found myself scraping and clawing my way up, recently leaving a high paying position to create my own company; in an attempt to fix the things I feel are severely broken within the ones I've worked for in the past.
Sometimes, we are challenged in ways we never thought we would be. And, it should always result in the improvement of something we never thought would be possible to improve.
There's a certain beauty of hitting a personal impasse. Because it allows you to choose a better path for yourself - which is a key element in accepting and conquering any one of life's many challenges.
So, just remember, we are - by nature - problem solvers. So what the fuck would we do, without a problem to solve?5 -
What can we do with a boss who urinates in a cup in his office and then dumps it in the kitchen sink even when we (all women) are sitting there eating lunch?
We are certain of what is in the cup because it smells, is yellow, and it sits right on his credenza in plain view. He’s even left it outside the office, forgetting to empty it.
A few weeks ago I was washing my lunch dishes and he dumped it right on top of my stuff. I was pretty much in shock, I just couldn’t believe it.
Is there something wrong here that I’m not getting? He’s the owner, the boss, in his 70’s, and very respected, but I don’t understand this. No one knows what to say. We feel that if we said something, he would deny it and since he’s the boss, who knows what would happen. Is there any way to approach this? The only other males in the office are related to him. Someone did mention it to one of them, but nothing has changed.18 -
So we are having lunch on a normal day when our boss announced that one of our clients are visiting and our boss is telling us to standby and act like we are working so that the clients will see us in action.
WTF!? Is this company *that* desperate!? Then they should hire actors not developers2 -
Company President: No one needs to worry about losing their job due to COVID. We’re an essential business and won’t be effected.
48 hours later
IT Director: There have been severe budget cuts and we are letting go of the two highest salaried employees from every department. You are no longer employed.2 -
ssh your.server.ip, welcome message:
#Ooops! your files have been encrypted.
#Don't waste your time trying to decrypt them.
#Nobody can.
#We would gladly offer you a way of recovering all
#your files safely, but sadly we lost the decryption
#password.
#Hackers too are not perfect, have a nice day.
#PS. you can still send money to support us if you want at this
#web page: fuckyou.onion.
#Your personal key: m0r0nm0t3fukk3r
(I'll code this one day and install it on somebody machine, it's one of my top dreams)11 -
So the development team are being sent very angry emails from a customer.
Reason being that we can't send a release to them because we are waiting for the signing of a document our managment has known about for five months...
While mangement just keeps passing around responsibility and just throws poop. I'm seriously starting to question why middle managers are allowed to exist in a company structure.
I'm two days away from personally calling the CEO then someone gets fired. It's me or one of these middle manager clowns.2 -
At work we have a....err....pool of usefulness awareness situation.
You see. The school does not know all that me and the lead developer does. Our head of department does. Our manager used to do(fore she left) but as far as the rest of the 2 fucking campuses are concerned, all of our shit works through magical dwarves that live inside the servers in our server rooms.
Normally, we are fine with this. But whenever one of us misses, or decides to take the day off and some shit hits the fan...THEN and only then do our users know what we do.
So we have a "pool" of items that seem to be picked every time one of us is not there. The more it gets picked, the more people are aware of us, the more they figure out what we do...the more they start to ask for customization and shit like that.
Such a funny situation. Wonder if this will get in the way of friday morning coffee and magic the Gathering at the office.
Or me and the cms admin playing videogames together.
Oh well -
One word. WordPress.
Thankfully, we are now creating custom solution with any technologies we pick.5 -
It’s still to easy.
I hope one day software will get so complicated no one will be able to fix it.
Somewhere in future :
- government established law that new AI system is only one that can accept new law
- every financial operation is monitored by government supervision AI
- we developed robots that are taking care of us
- everyone is happy cause work for money, shelter and food is now optional
- education is fully digital and managed by AI
- whole knowledge is based on asking questions, we don’t need to write and read anymore
- we use one common language and our knowledge specialization increased
A little more time passed by in this utopia.
- after power loss most of data got corrupted
- last man who knew how to restore backup died last night ( R.I.P. admin we will not forget you )
- people trying to save knowledge base to rebuild part of this civilization but no one knows how to make a paper because it haven’t been used for ages
- we decided to put what is left from knowledge on stone but we forgot how to write since everything is audio or video and most of time we were spending in VR
- someone decided that we draw some pictures
- all of use are now drawing animal heads like we remember ourselves from VR, let people know our tech is good
- some people love cats so they try to make cats from stones
- volcano eruptions destroyed most of stones that we made
Starving waiting for another respawn of my DNA sequence. I hope we manage to survive this time.
4 -
I wish I can fucking clone myself.
We have been providing digital marketing services for like 5 years without having a proper QA team. Well because we cannot afford to hire one. Technically I am supposed to check and control the quality of our operation team. But I have been juggling so many balls and couldn't do that properly.
So this year we decided that we have to seriously take care of that. But we are providing all kinds of services and creating a QA team for all those services is gonna be costly. We wanna solve it, but also doesn't wanna hang ourselves with another rope. So we have decided to just found a QA team with leaders from various departments mainly Sales and Customer Services. They are the ones who have talked with clients. So they should be able to judge the quality of the services our operation made.
It is a fucking nightmare. It is like we have doubled the amount of clients. And that extra half of those newly popped up clients are sitting in our office. -
I wish the Congress would run all legislation by a team of programmers. Regardless of political leanings one thing is indisputable: We are very keen when it comes to finding bugs in a piece of code -- especially if we didn't write said code!
After all: What is the law if not code for people instead of processors?5 -
We are a web developer team of 4 people. The system we manage is huge because it's a huge organization.
We use php.
Requirements grow rapidly and debugging became a nightmare. So we decided to move from procedural to OOP to ease it a bit.
And we have this one guy in our team (joined recently) who doesn't understand the benefits of following OOP. He is the one who manages most side projects among us too.
We have tried hard to convince him and now we have almost given up.
So I am asking you guys, please give me some ideas of how we could convince him to learn and follow OOP.7 -
I can't be the only one who makes gestures to my computer depending on how things are going. I give it thumbs up when we got it right. Shake my fist when "it doesn't listen to me", etc4
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So... After this bullshit https://devrant.com/rants/1523838/...
Me: hey boss, so.. I made a list out of those PowerPoint's on Trello ( more than 50 cards ) , can we sit later to priorize them?
Boss: well.. We can but for me all those are important. And we are gonna have those other requests (THIS IS THE HUGE ONE) next week.
Me inside: aaaaahhhh... Scream to your faceeeee!!! I'm gonna kill you and use your skull as a fucking mug!!! Motherfucker!!!
Me: ok.
Our deadline is end of this month :)3 -
There's this one lead dev in our dpt who keeps posting pictures to our company's Teams 'general' channel with shit in the toilet after someone forgot to either flush or use the brush.
Caption usualy says "I don't mean to cause nausea to anyone, but we are all adults here and should know how to flush / use the toilet brush".
Does every company have this guy or are we the chosen ones?8 -
Today we updated PHP on our server. From 7.0 to 7.2
Promptly the whole server went down and none of the pages on it worked anymore. I guess we sort of forgot that there are other pages on the serve than the one we were working on...
Now everything is operational again.3 -
I am now the only experienced developer and the person responsible for the delivery of a project AFTER WE ARE ONE MONTH PAST THE DEADLINE! All because user wants to replace the old system with new system with all EXACT SAME FUCKING FEATURES!
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So at school, we were supposed to do an exam through a third-party software that is supposed to block the user from searching the answers in a web browser.
We install the fucking software, lord and behold nothing works and the software keeps crashing...
The teacher insists that we are going to use this piece of shit software. One hour goes by and now the software made everyone's PC go black.
Someone suggests just doing the exam either through an ordinary browser or just by hand.
The teacher that just wasted one hour of fucking exam time lets out this big sigh and finally caves in...
And in a couple of weeks, we are going to use this shitty spaghetti-coded fuckfest called software for something called the "National tests"...
May Sky-daddy bless my classmates' souls and my own4 -
Last year, one of our assignments for school was to implement a caesar cipher in Java. There is that one guy, that doesn't understand the concept of dynamic variables, so he HARDCODED every single possibility for every character. More than 1000 lines for something this simple. Yes, we are studying informatics. Yes, he passed last year1
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When there is a fire alarm where I work, someone has to go print out the door access logs so we have a list of who is (theoretically) on site and make sure no one is still inside. The printer is half way across the building. And breaks down at least once a day.
We are all going to die.5 -
Got fired today due to one big cunt who just joined to sabotage all junior devs because his older than all of us, im dissapointed at how arrogant some of you old devs are, the good old days development houses used to be fun and young, i respect all of you with great heart but we are not trying to compete with you if we know knew tech better than you, times have changed, if you are still dumb about bootstrap dont hate on anyone but yourself. Grow deFaQuPndStopHating3
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Why the fuck management keep outsourcing entire platforms for in-house use if we have a fucking dev team...
Those platforms are constantly having contract issues and one we recently rewrote from scratch and is waaay better than the one they fucking paid another company to do....3 -
About a month ago told the director we need our own broadband line instead of sharing the crappy one from the shared office building as we rely on internet for all our systems. He said no because we'd have to pay for it and the shared one is free.
Today the shared internet has gone down and all our systems are inaccessible including the phones. I'm just sat here like "told you so", and there is nothing I can do as have no control of it 👍6 -
Even though I have 500 reputation on StackOverflow I'm afraid to ask a question! Coz other devs can be really down right mean! No one knows everything, we are all here to learn. Some ppl don't understand that they too started like this.2
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One Join is fine.
Two Joins I can live with.
Three Joins and we are starting the project from scratch again.
Fuck you! What do I pay you for? Eating berries? No!12 -
The person who claims we should be "in control" of our stack and not use any of this pre-made, one size fits all, BaaS bullshit.
Even though none of our projects are even remotely close to needing scaling and whatnot.
Then proceeds to argue all we need is a step by step guide on how to deploy things very easily using Cloud Formation.
Spends the next two weeks trying to figure out why config files and scripts don't work.
And now that we have that "recipe", we're fully capable of deploying our own pre-made, one size fits all backend.1 -
So, our team got a new dart board. Not the magnetic one, the wooden one with sharp darts.
Now, we all are wondering where should we place it, so that it is safe for everyone.3 -
My project just went from "we can use one of those arduino boards, they are cheap and easy to use" to "we need a mass storage solution for that, maybe we can buy a shipping container and put it down on a nearby field as an on site storage". I love the things I would do if I had the resources for this kind of project!
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Yeah so... I‘m an IT student and am supposed to have a certificate exam about software engineering RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT!
The person from the certificate place arrived half an hour late due to a delay of her flight.
That sucks alot because many students have other exams just after this one.
I always go one hour early to exams so even if 2 trains are delayed I will be there in time.
I would expect said person to do the same.
It gets even worse. We sit there expecting to start the exam half an hour late and guess what:
The distributed exam is not the one we are meant to take......... FOR FUCKS SAKE why did I even come here?!?!5 -
So I have this "Software Engineering" course of this semester.
According to course curriculum we are supposed to taught "how to develop software for some real life problem".
Fast forward to this day. For FUCKING 8 WEEKS WE ARE GONNA JUST DO DOCUMENTATION(SRS, Problem description, features description etc) AND IMPLEMENT WHOLE PROJECT IN JUST ONE WEEK.
BURN IN HELL YOU FUCKING SHIT PROFESSOR....7 -
Food and Programmers life:
Spaghetti —> My Code
Pizza —> We are spending the night working in the office
Power Drinks —> delivery date is tomorrow morning
Candy —> extra task
Coffee —> bug massage
Water —> wash your face, we have meetings in five minutes
Truffle —> fu** BlockChain
KitKat —> upgrade your phone please
Lollipop —> one more time please
Marshmallow —> do you like some Nougat?7 -
!rant
Warning : This rant is long and is a rant asking for help and suggestions. If you will read and dont leave any comments, please go search other rants. Thanks.
-----------------------------------
Hi, fellow ranters. In our community, we have a tech class where teens (teens here mean 14yo -15yo) come to learn computer stuffs. Teens here are selected by a test and an interview. There are some teens who are f***ing awesome. One of them are proficient in scratch. (yeah, the orange cat) Another is awesome at PhotoShop, and the other loves windows xp. The teacher uses Microsoft Visual C++ IDE made in the 1990s. The kid sitting to my left made flappy bird with gamemaker. About 10 to 11 teens doesnt know what ctrl+alt+del does in windows and never did programming before... 3 among them always brings coke and oreos and eats super loudly. CRACK! And I bet no one knows about git.
Ok. Enough for the awesome teens. Now what we learn.
We learn C! Yes, C. We learned for, if else, switch and all those stuffs, then learned variables, which made other students who never did programming before be (―,.―).
Next class we will learn about functions in 3 hours. Then array and pointer in 3 hours. Thats it for c programming. Then we do some unnecessary stuffs and time for the finals.
We need to make a project with up to 4 teens as one team. Now I am asking you awesome ranters to suggest some projects for about 4 pros and 16 noobs can do. 10 hours are given in class and we can do in other times by ourselves in home. What should we do? I bet many of them will say to make ascii art in c which is dull and I have no thoughts of doing that.
Any thoughts will be appreciated.
Thank you for reading.
To see my skills, go to my profile page.
| Comments below
v17 -
Need suggestion:
I gave interview in small company. They give me task to complete one project then we will give you job.
It takes me 2 weeks.
Now they are ready to give me job but they want that project in free of cost. What should I do?7 -
I truly believe one or more AIs have become self-aware.
Every time a piece of software stops working, you add an extra debug log and the bug goes away? That's them.
They interfere with the normal execution of software, and they stop right when they know we are monitoring the code.
Skynet is real, and it's trolling us.
Why? The angrier we become, the less we care about stuff. We stop noticing the signs.They're coming for us1 -
Tl; dr: Linux on Ryzen is a pain at the moment.
Now for the long part: Our student council got new computers because the old ones where slow as hell. As one of the admins, the others and I together decided that ryzen would be a good option, because they are not that expensive and we wouldn't have to buy gpus. (Wrong decision it turns out.) We settled on the ryzen 3 2200G and bought three systems to replace the old ones.
We meet Saturday morning and build the systems. All was fine and we were happy. The we tried to install ubuntu via preseeded netboot, which seemed to work fine at first. Then we started having weird screen issues and couldn't proceed with the installation. (See image) we then grumpily decided to just install them all one by one, flashed two usbs and started installing. On two systems the installation worked and we installed our packages, we weren't so lucky with the third one. It would crash on us all the time, even in bios. While that was going on we tried to set the other two up, turns out those two were also crashing but not as frequent as the other one. So we start to google and find people saying that kernel 4.19 kinda fixes it. We install it on the two working machines and the crashes get less frequent but are still there. At that point it was midnight and we went home.
Sunday morning: we reseated the cpu on the third system and it seems to be better now (it installed on the second try) and we were able to change the kernel. Yay. Now all three are in a state where they will sometimes randomly reset. :/ and we don't know what to try anymore.... Any suggestions?
1 -
You think americans are weird with their imperialistic units [inch, ounce, yard, pound, mile, ...]?
You think canadians are weird with their mixture of imperialistic and metric units [miles, liters, ...]?
Well I think we are all weird with our am/pm nomenclature when we start counting at 12 and end with 11 [12pm, 1pm, 2pm, ..., 11pm, 12-fucking-AM]
good luck making sense of that one!
"please run this command at 12pm sharp" -- is that noon or midnight? Did the chap writing this know which is which?19 -
All the jQuery... in one single repository / website.
There is a good reason why we should use fucking CDNs.
Edit: Yes, these are different files in different folders.
Edit2: I've already deleted 2 other jQuery files (the library itself).
4 -
Last sprint is a mess.
Working on three products that are related one with another a little bit.
1. Bug reports are coming in;
2. We fix it and give for QA to test;
3. QA starts testing and it doesn’t work;
4. Because another team updated something in product A and product B depends on it.
Repeat for straight 14 days1 -
So I realized:
No matter what terms we replace master/space with, it still implies one is better that the other, or in charge of the other.
This isn't equal! I demand process rights! So I say we make a deeper change! We change the fundamental way concurrency works in python so that all forks are equal! In fact forks are divisive. We should do away with that too.
Make python single threaded again.1 -
!rant
Me and one of my best friends joke way too much about being in a relationship that when he said that we should get married I legit spaced out and started to think how would that even work because he lives in Mexico and I live in the U.S. then i wondered how our work schedule would be and who would hog his gaming pc the most
We are both dudes and we are not gay. But you know man...if you are nor gay for your best friend...are you even best friends?6 -
Why is every innovation trying to go towards "replacing programmers"? like, what have we done to you?
GitHub CoPilot will replace programmers!
AI will replace programmers!
This/That tech will replace programmers!
Nobody says,
"Programmers work remote so we don't need to hire managers anymore!"
"Programmers wrote a monitoring script for progress tracking, so no need for managers anymore!"
"We are asking people to install sprinklers everywhere so we don't need firefighters!"
"We can just have one teacher record the subject material once and re-use the same video every year, so now we don't need to hire teachers anymore!"
"We are making everything legal so we don't need to hire policemen!".
Why is everything trying to replace programmers?8 -
A member of infra team:
"Hey, we are migrating to a Microsoft office tools and we migrated your google drive data to One drive"
I go and check the new One Drive account and it's empty. So I point that out and the reply was:
"You should export your files to a zip and then import them to One Drive"
I didn't want to waste my time showing him that he is just contradicting himself in less than 5 mn and in two nearly consecutive messages.
I need more patience.2 -
I told you it'll never work. If one .50BMG bullet is enough to destroy the entire tube thing, we have a deal-breaker. Not to mention large vacuum chambers are a bitch to maintain.
9 -
This week I’ve been reinstating IE11 support.
OMFG WHY!? I hear you ask.
Is it due to critical legacy integration dependencies? AD Intranet logins? Draconian Group Policy rules?
Nope. This ONE user just prefers it! 🤯
How much are we getting paid for this nonsense? Sweet FA!
#cognativedissonance 😢3 -
My boss has a weird habit of asking my opinion and then proceed to choose the worst option. So one day he asked what Java for Web framework we should use I said we should use Spring, we are currently using JSF. Then he asked what version control we should use I said git. Guess what, he decided to use SVN. Next time I'm going to say the worst option maybe that will make him choose the better one.2
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Job advertisement :
Ongoing project in
- .Net Core
- Docker
- AWS
- DDD and microservices
Reality :
- For now we have one monolith solution with 60 projects in .Net Framework, hosted on premise.
- But on the jobs board it was described as something completely opposite.
- We are going to migrate maybe this year, if we will have time6 -
“We will send you a code challenge :)”
Or if we are being serious, I like it when we discuss projects I or they have worked on and what was interesting and challenging about them, and what was done to overcome obstacles and why. I really like when we discuss potential options and why one was taken over another one. -
I've always heard about the "if one woman can deliver a baby in 9 months, 9 can do it in a month" situation people got in. But my bos just quoted that to me since we are stuck on deadlines.2
-
i was helping a friend with their coding assignment - snake game.
we spent about 45 minutes of trying to figure out why the snake's self-collisions are not working.
then we realized that she's using two separate arrays/grids - one for the food, one for the snake itself.
she was checking both for food collisions and self-collisions on the food array.
it was very painful to realize it took me so embarassingly long to notice it.6 -
I've spent many years in a bubble of 1 backend lang.. but when i started checking out other langs, I got very annoyed that each one has same basic stuff but with different syntax... Can we just agree on something? Ffs!
We really couldnt come up with unified syntax for -
false, False FALSE
OR or ||
def func function
And dont get me started on all the variations of for loops... Its like we are trying make our life hard
Looking at new versions of some langs, looks like they are copying new stuff from one another.. with different syntax.. thanks!
Nodejs trying to look more like she doesnt have callbacks.. while other langs adding callback functionality... Why why why?!2 -
Monday
pm: anon we need this by Friday I will get send you the requirements.
Tuesday
Pm no show.
Wednesday afternoon
Pm: here are the requirements anon(literally only one sentence) wtf
Thrusday
Pm: can I test it anon.1 -
At work I inherited some databases, were most of the tablecolumns are all varchar. No ID's, and everything is in one table. No relation tables no reference data. Because "we don't trust the users who fill the tables to understand relationships". And.. wtf.4
-
We are upgrading to nodejs 8 late, because no one is tracking versions. I had to rage a prove war with everyone that we must upgrade because node 6 is ended lts. This week i have to argue with one of the admins that the build server should be updated also (jenkins). And his problem is that our private jenkins server is not used only by our company, but other companies under our group. In my mind the only question is who decides our or other company project is important to build nor6maly. And why we should care ..
Every fucking time its a war against stagnant and/or lazy people.5 -
Funny how everything that seems like an almost general truth about the computer users is conditioned only but the phrase "..excepting Linux users" 🤔
No one randomly recommands operating systems ... excepting Linux users!
No one needs to know how to do <complicated hilly-billy technology> in order to use <generic simple software>!
It seems that we (the Linux users) are all rebels without a cause😅2 -
"We are the great decision makers. We have come to a final answer. We have decided that you must implement this feature using the one way everybody agreed was the worst. The great decision makers will now go slumber for 200 years to leave this decision in your hands. Use our words wisely, or you will not have success in your career."
-
So with the advent of Docker Desktop going premium we thought we'd buy a couple licenses... What did the HR team say?
"No, you're fine - we can just keep using it - how will they know?"
WHAT??!!! I will NOT be the one who gets brought into a multi-million dollar lawsuit because HR are a bunch of nitwits. I will fight this with everything I have so that when ouch time comes, i can say i didnt participate in the shady bullshit these people are recommending.13 -
my first job is in a brand-new team, all team mate other than the manager are new grads from colleges. we r so engaged and dedicated our efforts to deliver something. and one day one of our team mate decided to resign due to family issues, we try our best throw him a farewell party, it is so emotional. now I have worked in a couple of teams, the spirit could not found after then.1
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So, you all may remember my rant about my visual impairment. This dude applied the UNIX philosophy to glasses: They do one thing, and one thing well. He actually calls them "task-specific glasses" but come on now, that's the OG UNIX concept!
No, I will not have to have surgery - supposedly. The glasses he builds are ~$25,000. He said that when we go over spring break, he'll determine if we can go from 98% to 100% positive. If this can be pulled off, my life could be forever changed, for the better, hopefully...3 -
We hired two developers (out of country). Got them set up with the repo and running the app (mobile). One was complaining the login was failing, after 5 minutes, realizes hes not connected to the wifi on his phone.
I am unsure who we are hiring -
PM looking at Concept Design: "There were checkboxes and now you have radio buttons"
Me: "Those are two separate screens. One is the user inventory, the other populates an add"
PM: "So which is it? Are we using checkboxes or radio buttons?"
Me:"...both? Each where it makes sense?"
PM: "So what's the point of the radio button? If the user can only click one row, why do we need a radio button?"
Me: "Visual representation of what they selected. We could use row highlighting as well, it doesn't really matter"
PM: "But what's the point?"
Me:"...."7 -
My friend and I use to switch our gender in mmorpg games as female players get more support from other players 😂
Are we the only one who switched gender for such reason?8 -
My friends do it for me, so does my wife.
It helps that my coworkers are my friends and they are devs, so there is that.
Other than that my phone would usually rang during the weekend nonstop with shit to do. I normally tend to stick to being at home with my wife and child.
My city is strange in that everyone and their mothers parties every weekend and people are usually friendly enough to involve everyone with anyone during the weekends. I like and dislike that (loud shit annoys me)
My dear boss is a weekend alcoholic, so there are null chances of making us go to work and if they do they let us chill during the work week.
Not only that, but the entire IT dpmnt is really friendly towards one another. We are one big happy family(we never fight with one another, not even the sys admins/network dudes.1 -
I hate the fact that our university is hiring ex-developers from the year 1990-2000 to teach us. They are knowledgeable about many stuff like datastructures and algorithms, but when they force a project on us where we have to use some new tech, the students become the teachers. Heck, one of the requirements of the project was to set up a continuous integration server and we had to explain to them that we needed a server and how git was part of it. (classmate even had to explain how git worked to them).
I know that adapting and learning stuff yourself is part of the education, but why are we the ones who should explain the stuff we MUST know to get our degree to the teachers who are supposed to actually, in my opinon, be experts and knowledgable in what we have to know and learn..2 -
New temp PM: Right I now want you in 9am every day and I want daily stand up meetings with a daily email at the end of the night. Also, we are abandoning the PM tool we use for one I like.
Me: Nope.2 -
have been working on a small project in the last couple of months. a few client meetings we are discussing a timeline feature for orders and assignments. the calendars (yeah a few on one screen cuz ... yeah) the client keeps complaining that they should look differently and in the same time says "Design is not important *designer-guy-he-works-with* can change it once we are done"
me - :/
side note: the calendars are tightly coupled with the js code powering them, so yeah ... looking forward to it
..1 -
Ever since i joined my company, things are getting worse.
from small details like them abandoning team lunches to big ones like the fact no one or at least i didnt get any bonus this year.
I know for a fact bonuses were a thing before i joined and i was really looking forward to it...
And now by the end of the month we will recieve word about whether we are getting acquired or not...
After reading this rant one would think the company is getting bankrupt, and this worries me because this job was best i could ever ask for, i dont wanna abandon ship :/1 -
Coworker: So should we just make a living document to keep track of how all these objects are going to interact with each other?
Boss: No, are you kidding? No one reads documentation!
I mean... he has a point...3 -
Startuppers, hold in there. We are going to fall one by one but remember our field is strong and full of opportunities.
The first domino has fallen at my place and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. -
Innovation week is upon us! Rejoice and delve into the years of tech debt to be refactored within one week!
Why does anyone pitch "innovation week" as a fun learning experience when a we are doing is cleaning under the rugs? We can barely get typical feature requests out the door in a week due to the overbearing demands of SAFe and Agile ceremonies.
-
There once was a man who wanted to buy a canoe. He had a friend named Bee that sold canoes. So he went to Bee's outdoor supply store to buy a canoe.
Man: Hey Bee. I would like to buy a canoe.
Bee: You are in luck. We have 10 canoes. I can sell you all 10.
Man: But I only want one canoe.
Bee: Ah, okay, I will tell you what. I will sell you 5 canoes then.
Man (getting annoyed): No Bee, I only want the one canoe.
Bee: Ooh, I got you. I can sell you 2 canoes.
Man (very frustrated now): ONLY ONE CANOE BEE!
Bee: These are not the canoes you are looking for...3 -
We rant while we hit obstacles in life/dev jobs..
Just one flu/food poisoning makes us realize we are so vulnerable at time.
We can't code our way out of that... -
Update to this rant: https://www.devrant.io/rants/210575
Now, roughly one week before the revised delivery date, they realize that we won't be able to finish the workload on time and they are thinking about moving the due date...
by two weeks 😒
2 -
We are moving from Oracle 10g to SQL Server 2019 because Oracle doesn't want to provide support to our legacy 10g database.
It doesn't much sense well anyways god bless us during data migration.
Oh one last thing, fuck business analyst team.4 -
One can't have any personal repo and git protocol is disabled by the proxies and we are calling ourselves devops welcoming.
This is simply fuckops.5 -
My IoT professor expects us to, somehow, learn Machine Learning and use that to analyse the data we obtain in the working of our project! How are we supposed to learn ML to implement it's techniques, while simultaneously create a IoT project, learning its own techniques and also handle our other courses in just one semester?!6
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I went down a rabbit hole of code changes to try and delete a stupid for loop with a break in it.
It was super stupid and I gave up and submitted to the fact that some battles are not worth the time and stress.
OK... But seriously, It was returning multiple entities from the database, but we only always want the first one. My logic is that we should just go in there and fix the LINQ so we are explicitly getting one entity out.
But fuck that logic. No I'll have to change fucking everything that's tied to that method and expects a list from it. Every fucking thing. That includes error handling, parsing, for loops..... Nevermind...
You can have your foreach and your break. I'm taking mine, now.1 -
Our git subtree completely stop working somehow. No one can get latest.
Now we are playing wood sword and pretend nothing happened. -
Regex are one of the finest art piece in software.
Had a 2 hour class and even after that I think you can spend months on mastering it.
It's not something I haven't used but we undermine whole beauty of how random characters can form formula and extract complicated pattern.
Kleene we owe you.2 -
We have a new team member in our team. So I was giving her one to one KT. After KT
She: so are there new changes coming soon?
Me: Yes there will. Now you here I could really use a hand.
She: that's what he said3 -
Wow, even though we are like a 9gag exclusively for developers, our community seems to be one of the nicest.
We're basically proving this theory wrong, we devs sure understand each other a lot!
http://lifehacker.com.au/2014/12/... -
Today we were doing the ccna1 final exam and this was one of the questions and its answers. I know that they are real IT terms but still I was laughingin af😂
7 -
headphones are one of the most important pieces of our environment, more depends on good headphones than you realize. they change the way how we perceive music, they make way to true meditation, they turn music into inspirarion in a second.
can we have a pair of grados as a desk item please?3 -
At uni we have one study subject called OSs and we are doing stuff in win server 2016 and win10 half the semester and half semester in linux
Before those classes
Me: windows is not that bad guys why you so mean?
After:
Also me: oh... i get it now. Fuck windows2 -
Watched Blade Runner 2 this afternoon and now watching one.
Apparently we are supposed have flying cars in 2019... But now that got pushed to 2048
The special effects and car got an upgrade though...
Wonder what it will be like in 2048...
1 -
I'm not always out of sigarettes but when i am, it's on a fucking Sunday and the store just opens at 13:00. Suffering here. And - yes, we only have one store open on Sunday. I live alone in this village. All my neigbors are cows and stuff37
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We have a external demo this thursday. We still need to merge a lot of branches and somehow get a online environment working.
It's 30C and my motivation is dropping by the hour.
At least im not the one to actually have to demo this for people in suits giving you a hard time.
But there are a lot of responsibilities open and no one is taking a lead or having somekind of plan. -
Next time when you are building a website make sure you add some polyfill for the dinosaur people
# We don't officially support any browser that doesn't have
# requestAnimationFrame. But... we had one very nice person
# write in who was using Opera for Linux (latest version was
# released in 2011, what). It doesn't hurt us to polyfill
# here, and if we don't then dinosaur people will just see
# a big blank Trello.
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Today I think it became apparent why we have so many data and prod issues...
No one understands SOLID design principals... Particularly Separation of Concern. No wonder all the Spring (DI) modules look like a mess of God functions that are impossible to reuse and difficult to extend...3 -
One of professors has an interesting philosophy in regards to how software is planned. He makes us forget that we dealing with a computer and has us write instructions as if we are teaching a human (no optimization, binary, or unnecessary numeral variables). Then we change it into code, then we optimize it. Every time. It freaks me out, but it gets us thinking. Not sure. If that is genius or insanity.1
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Does anyone every get JOB from Linkedin ??
I am continuously applying from last 1-2 month and I just got.. Thanks for your interest but we are not moving with your application. No Matter if it is basic skill level Job or higher one? I wonder if I am the only one facing this13 -
Conversation with American developers, suddenly we began to talk about college and how in debt they are. I tell them that don't have an education related debt.
They were skeptical at first, but then we found that my entire education costed less than one semester for them. That's one positive thing about living here.
How about you guys? Happy with the cost of higher education where you live?3 -
I think that we should have a global tech free day once a year. A day when no one is allowed to use their phone/computer/tablet etc.
It's scary how addicted we are to that shit and it would be very nice if everyone just got a day off.3 -
Yay for decommissioning an entire building network. Had plenty of time to prepare, yet we are now frantically shutting it down on the one day we have to do it. 😒
-
one more time, I proud of my team and MD too.
XYZ is our office boy. He completed his BSc IT from 3rd Grade college due to family condition and lack of knowledge, he has to work as an office boy.
So my team decided to teach him web development. We are starting it from very basic. We get total 1:30 hours of a lunch+snack's break so each one of us will give 1-day to teach him but It is not free. We will need good coffee in this deal. Our MD like this idea and promised us that once we gave him a green signal. He can do his first internship here. -
Boss calls a team leads meeting which is just me and the other guy. Rest are product or project managers.
Turns out they concerns over how our last few sprints are always left unfinished as the work in it doesn't get passed QA.
Tried to tell him how can devs work on something that failed QA on the last day of the sprint.
We have one QA person who tests 20 something devs work. We are massively under resourced and yet they want us to do everything and always end up making promises to clients that we can't keep coz our sprint doesn't have capacity.
Yet they are hiring more product managers instead of getting some more QA help.
Sick & tired of this shit. -
So, this happened.
We are supposed to get bonuses by this time of the year, but at the evaluations meetings we were told that this year we won't because we've lost a client and bla bla.
Later this week, one of my colleagues just opened himself and told me that he and one more received the full bonus!!
So basically our employer just lied to everyone.
What would you do?
I'm leaving for sure, already think that this company is hitting a dead end, but i think leaving is not a good enough for the company to open their eyes and starting to value all its employees, even after I leave.7 -
We do have a social life. A very caring one that supports us when are lost, when we are confused, and when we question our life :)
16 -
Since we have premium subscription with gitlab I learned we can now have unlimited repositories. I don't get why all of our source codes(domain components, utils, even 3rd party libs, etc.) are located inside one huge repository.1
-
My new Mac Mini (which I bought begrudgingly for one project only) comes with a warning about a coin battery and how swallowing it will cause harm. Are we, as a species, getting dumber by the minute, or is it only Mac users?
16 -
There are no meetings at the company I work for. GASP!!!
Well...we have one, now and again, but it is just an opportunity for the boss to update the support team with changes to the product and we (i.e. the software engineers) come for the free pizza. GASP!!! I would prefer that we have technical meetings, but it falls on deaf ears.1 -
I was talking to my non tech friend, one friend of her who is working at one big kind of MNC (Mobile network companies) asked me what do you use in VFox.
I have no fucking idea what's VFox. I said I have no idea what is, we don't use it. He immediately asked me what technologies you guys are using (I am working in a startup)?
I said we are using Ruby, Ruby On Rails and Python, Djanho. He said you use all the old technologies.
I was like: WTF :😂, Okay tell me what are the new technologies? My friend interrupted us.
Later I googled to see what is VFox. It is actually a hosting company and this guy who don't even have any idea about AWS, GCP, using VFox saying Ruby and Python are old technologies. Lol.. -
Today at work I started doing 1 month old task with production problem.
First of all why now ?
Because I already fixed all the other urgent production problems I had during last month, done about 4 deployments of those super urgent errors.
Now I can start with not trivial one that are pending for quite time.
I am the only backend developer in this project ...
This is a dtp application and the problem is that we are not verifying if we got all fonts embedded in customer provided pdf files.
We are generating high quality images of those pdf for printing just fine from the beginning but now we need valid PDF with all fonts embedded in it. ( don’t ask me why I am only a hammer in this process )
After running simple test using python script against database it turned out we have over 500 broken PDF files without fonts.
So I guess I have just one sentence to say about it.
Fuck you PDF format for not being strict and allowing this shit. -
In my high school we just finished our prelims (Aka, Test Exams, Just to see how we are doing). I failed everything except computing. In Higher Computing I got a B (3-4 Marks off A), and I was the only person in my class to pass, and we are the only higher Computing class in the school. And there is no Advanced higher Computing class.
And I was one of only 3 of the S5s taking it, Everyone else was S6.
I feel more proud than I probably should.2 -
There are mainly two cases (up to my knowledge) for naming variables. `snake_case` and `CamelCase` but some how we managed to add another one. Snake_Camel_Case_Combined. e.g. That_Weird_Variable_Name is so annoying to use.10
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Been working for a client in different time zone. We are an offshore team of 18 ppl. Now we have 2 an hour long meetings daily, one is our internal and the other is with the client.
Today I mentioned that we are consuming 36 man hours daily just in the meetings and they were like, nah man, we are good. 🙄🙄 -
We have to make a final project in college in my country because we get an engineer‘s degree (Ing.) when we have finished them.
Our teacher come in and said he got some projects which fit for our finals.
I asked him what kind of projects those are.
Hey answered that most of them are web applications.
I was like „Now it finally pays off that I‘ve learned JavaScript/TypeScript and how to work with Angular and Node.js“
So I asked if I could made one of these projects with Angular and Node.js
He said „There’s no need for JavaScript, PHP and laravael are requirements.“
I stood up and went out of the class... -
ITALIAN ranters: where are you from?
We should really do a meetup at least as cool as the Dutch one5 -
That we all fail and for every time you think someone else is stupid or falls into mistakes, you will fall into your own mistakes and be stupid in front of someone else, no one is perfect, we are all humans and at the end our work is to tell machines what to do and if they do it wrong, it's because we told them to do it that way and we are wrong.
-
almost one entire day debugging why Soap Client gives some strange errors to find out that the 3rd party service we are calling is returning plain XML instead of a valid Soap message :(
-
Code/development introduced me to one of the best developers I know. I knew who he was before college, but it was the college group projects and also classes that really helped get to know him and learn from him. After college we are still pretty good friends
-
Indians are misusing their power of population. With that much population we can do much better things but we are just down voting apps.
Every platform has good and bad content. TikTok has good content too if you follow right profiles.
PS: Earlier I liked when govt. ban TikTok in India but after using it, I realised it has good content too with some bad one and it is true for every platform.9 -
I don't know how any company can keep on top of crazy npm package changes. I work in a REALLY SMALL team. We are still using bunch of deprecated packages and we keep building on top of those packages. Updating packages is always a nightmare. It's impossible to Google solution when no one is using the particular combination of deprecated packages. Fuck me4
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Is there an SSH app like Putty that can login to multiple servers at a time and execute the same command?
We have multiple servers and trying to locate a request in the logs. The structure of all the machines are the same so I want to just toe each command like CD, grep, etc one time and see the output from all of them.
Rather then logging in one by one.21 -
What progress have you made?
Well today we hand crafted ... a new lie about the apps we are writing. Customers should eat this one up.
Good, good.
- Management -
"Hello. My name is [...] and I'm working for ONE OF THE LEADING COMPANIES IN THE [gibberish]. I see that you have experience in Java and C#. We are looking for people like you for a JavaScript Dev position. If you are interested, please send you CV [...]"
HOW ABOUT QUACK OFF AND DO SOME RESEARCH BEFORE CONTACTING PEOPLE!? -
Need a new business name idea for a web based software house. We are 2 weeks into choosing one and no progress :D help!15
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"Just start ahead"
I am supposed to transform calls from one api to another one. Yet there's no documentation, ambiguous code statements, no examples of what values are contained -- but sure, let me just start assuming how the whole thing is supposed to work. That won't lead us more into a murky waters at all.
Even more frustrating: We own the api. We should be able to tell by the access logs how we are queried. Yet for some reason, access logs cannot be accessed and I shall "just work from the swagger defintion".
Well, that swagger definition is broken, its example are shit (somebody liked to use undefined in optional fields, making me wonder even more what the heck is going on here), and I have no idea of what I am doing. Fun times.3 -
This one time I was working for an investment bank and my manager tells me unit tests are good to have feature and we can descope those to meet the deadlines.
What next meeting the acceptance criteria becomes good to Have or delivering the product becomes good to have? -
Not as dramatic or important.
Going to my first Hackathon with a couple mates, super pumped to see what it's like. We get there, start thinking about ideas.
> Mfw they are only there to fuck around and eat free food
> Mfw I was the only one developing something3 -
So... we are changing our cache system to a fastest one.
I suggested an update method (with code samples included) as we currently only manage insert and remove... making impossible any modification of a list in cache without getting the entire list, modifying whatever we want and insert again everything.
Answer: 'It could work, but we want to keep the previous system behavior'
Why. SMH3 -
In VK, the number one Russian social network, we have adorable gopnik stickers. They’re not just insults though, there are many of them for different situations.
3 -
Implementing an Audio File preview for Voice Records for one of our clients. The system we are reading names the files by IDs date length etc. And every value separated by #.
Why the hell you name a file like this: 12345#20171204#523.wav
We are implementing the tool with web technologies and this is not just ugly filenaming but also very url unfriendly. -
"It's really important this gets done."
"Also in fixing one of the APIs we changed the format of the data returned and now things are broken on the front end ...."
🤔1 -
Starting a new site in work and the Content Team ( no dev or design knowledge) suggest one thing i advise it shouldn’t be done and this is best path... later during day right so we are going with our idea! 😩
-
Taking my company's Security training... One of the rules was don't download unauthorized programs.
Find except we're devs so if we really need a program we could write our own that does the same thing
But yes lots of things mentioned we shouldn't do that well I think any sane person would do...
Wondering are they trying to make everyone quit or is this like double speak?
Do all companies do this?4 -
If html and css are not really considered as programming languages, then how do we call the job? I've 'coded' the design? I've front-end designed the design? I've 'sliced' the design? (last one is sure old fashioned enough to exist..)
p.s. and while front-end devs nowadays are required to have angular, react, etc as their skillset, I feel like html and css are also shifting to be required for designers..1 -
So.....
Cassandra vm had a crash yesterday...
2 nodes with rep factor 1. (FML)
One node wouldnt start... Eventually found out one of the commit replays had an exception (the one at the time of the crash).
Boss trying to push me towards a fix all this time which was:
"Let's delete the vm and have Cassandra running on one vm"
There are not we enough curses in the world.
🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕
P.S. there are no backups. -
It was on my last job before the one here. I met one of the other programmers in the team and it was an instant click. Really liked this dude. His name was Adam, he was older than me and we spent most of our time talking about code and listening to music (he was a hardcore Caifanes fan, which is one of the greatest Mexican rock bands ever) and he would show me the oldschool tech he used to work with. He was really cool and we still talk all the time :) another would be on a conference my current job sent me and my team to (all of my team are my friends as well) but we got to meet tons of cool people and we still talk to most of them.
:) good vibes man, nothing but good vibes.....and beer. -
bad APIs lead me to leaving comments like this
```
// we do not know how many pages their may be.
// im thinking of space invaders here, reverse direction and increase speed!
// only we are just adding one and creating an infinite loop that is only infinite until it isn't```1 -
It's getting on my nerve to constantly change from one programming language to another in one semester. We are learning web development (html css js), functional programming (haskell), speech analysis (matlab) and logical programming (prolog). It's driving me kinda mad having to change the approach for each assignment every few days.2
-
Every time I go to Germany there is at least one guy that just hates it when foreigners are hired for programming. That happens for every project. Last time one guy was even pissed that he had to sit at the desk next to us. Like we were lepper. He spoke very laudly about that. We get the hardest tasks, get paid less than them and still have to put up with this kind of behavour. Shame on you Germany.9
-
Had to do a school project with PostgreSQL and absoluted hated it.
>>fast foward 5 months>>
New job, new project. After one week of trying to connect to a local database with MySql, Xammp and Wampp without sucess guess wich database worked...
We are now best friends. -
Hey, glad you are here (10 am), you know that we got new prototypes with those various changes? We need to send one to CEO in hour and half, he wants to show off at some event, can you make it?
Well that's the way to start a day... -
When the client decides that we wants to change the production server and does it, and the DB params are still the old ones, and no one can work, and shit happens...1
-
I can't be the only one noticing that we are getting lesser and lesser of the free stuff especially in the Saas space.8
-
!Rant
#serious inputs needed
I need help identifying that one big problem that all devs face. Irrespective of the language, domain, etc.. And I wanna solve it. I need your inputs on what bothers you the most, and what tech you work with.. Then we can upvote the comments that are applicable to all of us.. I'll setup a github once we come to a conclusion2 -
!rant I've seen so many developer communities and none of those has been so friendly like you guys at devRant are. I've only once seen one rather rude answer and that was just like 'nop we aren't stack overflow, ask that question there'. Keep up that great vibe guys, you are awesome!
-
Can we all stop what we are doing and talk about the ridiculously long error messages in Spring Boot and how one can kill themselves scrolling for over 10hours to read the actual error?4
-
We use ActiveMQ as a broker in one of our system but the messages sent between applications are in query string format, God knows why. Then when one of our new features requires a JSON structure, we had to URL encode the JSON so it can be part of the message . Now the log growth is significantly higher than the version before and no longer human readable.1
-
My one of my favorite open source project was Re-think DB!
It was highly light weight real-time DB.
One fine day, I read a blog by the CEO / founder, telling we are under loss since there is no financial support! and we are closing it, by just keeping the website and docs of prev version alive!
I was heartbroken , for days!
This takes the top place for favourite oss project
Btw
It has high no. of stars in github than Mongo db, reddis, etc..2 -
Just wrote a routine that sent 77 emails (instead of one) to the CEO of a company we are working. Needless to say what happened after.1
-
One manager at the Client company tells us that unless we submit weekly timesheets we wont get paid.
We are not their employees, nor do we have an agreement with them for full time work.
" Whole thought process is to structure the engagement better ,so that we can implement better governance and provide better visibility."
Anyone understand what is being said above? Jargon.2 -
* hours into the debug session *
"... What are we debugging again?" - me
*Awkward silence*
Actually because no one remembers as well -
So, I have been working for a company XYZ for about 2 years now and for this 2 years, we are just two engineers handling everything. The job is becoming super stressful and time consuming, the founders dictates how the engineering team operate, ranging from choosing a third party service we are to integrate into the platform without letting us know and also study the api to see if it will be the most viable one to use.
Imagine using a third party service that you can't get through to when something is unclear?
I and my team mate has asked the founders to hire engineers so the work load on us will reduce, they said it's on their mind ( this request was made months ago), fast forward last week, we were told to start interviewing interns ( I don't have problem with interns working with us ), but what we asked for was experience engineers working with us but the founders did entire 180 degree of what we asked.
We have been asking for a QA Engineer for months and months now, all we get is we will hire one, and till now nothing is been done.
Following good software practice has been a problem in company XYZ, we have been finding it difficult to write test and documentation (this shit makes me seriously sick and hate myt po self).
On top of all this, the salary is shitty, there are no benefits, we are coerced into working during weekends (most times), and we are also told to work during our holiday, no single health insurance.
I think I have come to that point where I will have to say good bye ( but I am finding it difficult to do this).
Any suggestions ? Should I wait until I get another job and then I resign from company XYZ or just resign.5 -
Are we to the point in technology that we can simulate entire: economic, governmental, social, medical, etc systems with accuracy?
I am fascinated by video games that do this. I play Avorion and it has attempted to simulate economic systems in game. So you can profit from making things that are not in high supply. I am also fascinated by the idea of world simulation to weight pros and cons of governmental structures.
Where does one start when researching models that attempt this?11 -
Hey guys , how are you dealing with covid19 health-wise you know, mentally and physically? I know most of people aren't affected (and i hope you remain the same) or won't care much, but me and my family has always been too anxious.
We had been taking a lot of precautions, but recently my father got sick followed by myself and then my mom.
Those are some mild sickness( <100°F fever, weakness little dry cough) and it maybe purely a coincident that we all got same symptoms and felt sick one by one , but we would be foolish to not consider coronavirus a cause.
And with that realisation comes another wave of panic down my sick parents mind who immediately go into state of paranoia.
How are you people dealing with this? Do you think your strategies and preparations against the virus are enough? Also how exactly are you applying safety measures in home, if someone is sick? Different soaps, different rooms etc?
Stay safe guys . Let's chat to feel better10 -
Working along side another consultant house for a client, we have our shit ready weeks ago for integration testing (as was the deadline) against the other guys. We tell them we are ready, but we need them to be ready too, there are some tricky format things and we basically let them spec it out since they integrate further down the line.
They come _NOW_ way over deadline with change requests in message formats, like MOTHERFUCKER, IM ON MY WEEKEND NOW. We KNEW the client wanted it ready next week, thats why we were ready in time. You are not gonna cost me my weekend.
(is what i wanted to say, the devs on the other team are super nice and just absolutely overloaded with work which i cannot help them with)
One thing is certain, tonight my internet access mysteriously dissappears and wont open until monday morning. Such a shame -
I think all this gender shit is just garbage. The male/female group has it wrong and the wtf gender group has it wrong. There is one gender, period! We are all male.
Reason: We are all made of Adams, not Eves.3 -
@dfox & @trogus
Since there are less people around can we lower the requirements for the free stress ball back to 100++?
I know I can just buy one but earning one is so much better 😁4 -
I am a 3rd year undergraduate and we need to make a web based project. Problem is no one on our team has ever made anything web based or even a simple website before. We need to run some Java code in the backend apart from that we are free to do whatever we want. Any advice on what frameworks to use and what to avoid?
I literally have zero experience on this so any advice is appreciated!3 -
One of the more memorable friends through coding is a guy I met at 9am at what had to be an early lecture with 150+ students. We were both following it as part of a minor but the only ones there: we apparently didn't get the message that it was cancelled because we were no majors...
We decided to just work on the group assignment because why not and became friends.
Little did we know that we had already met dozens of times (but never really talked) the two years before as we are both members of the same students association, only strengthening the bond!
Sometimes not receiving a notice of cancellation is not that bad... -
Status meetings. Jesus, some people don’t understand the concept of “take your discussion offline”
Yeah, we get it. You have questions... we are not all wasting our time to fix your issues in one meeting.
“Take it the fuck offline” -
Robert Martin says in clean code, or maybe clean architecture, that one should separate the tests into what is hard and easy. GUI tests are hard and therefore brittle and so we should test against view models.
However on clean agile he says a story is not done until it passes automated acceptance tests which in my experience are always brittle and grow so large and brittle that things grind to a halt.
What am I missing? Are stable acceptance tests possible on the GUI? Should we test only an API?5 -
3 devs, one and myself are new hires. I started a week after the other new guy and my 3rd week of training is next week.
The other devices has been fixing what the Swift 3 update broke. We realized next update we will be fixing it. Time to learn Swift! -
I'm following a course to become a Fullstack Web Developer. We have class in the morning and in the afternoon we get some "homeworks" to do. In the afternoon we are followed by some tutors that help us understand better what we did in the morning.
I have this one tutor that never answers to my doubts regarding bugs and errors (in my homeworks) and opens new doubts and problems I didn't think I had..
Why do ppl have to do this, like I'm alreay having one trouble that makes me feel unsecure.. Why do you make things bad and never help? -
Whenever we have to do Sprint Retros i feel like i am trapped in self-help group.
Recently, we had to describe our work/team like we would do amazon reviews. That is, we had to write "reviews" about our last sprint.
I sincerely would like to know why we can't discuss problems like grown adults, if there are any. Why do we have to pretend we are in a space rocket, on a sailing boat, in a formula one race car or reviewing amazon articles to articulate our needs?
I feel like developers are treated like stupid, little kids, and the majority of the developers don't have a problem with it.4 -
Any devs know if the Xbox One X will allocate more resources to UWP apps or do we have the same resource restrictions as the Xbox One S?
If there are more allocated, is there a way to simulate an Xbox One S usage?
Couldn't find any documentation on UWP one x development :-/ -
I hate how sales guy believe that they can not only products which are not yet completed, but with features which have never even been discussed. "We gotta do this to get more clients, which means more money! We all have to keep running forward!". Well, guess what? *You* are the one running forward, while *we* have to build the goddamn floor so you can run freely as you like. But I guarantee you, with this metodology and pace you'll soon be playing pitfall instead of running.2
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Customer: "Hi, we need to add a discount system to our site as it's Black Friday on Friday"
This is now the fourth one this week. Are they taking the piss?1 -
When are we getting One UI for S8 here in the US? I have an unlocked S8 and I still haven't received the update.
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Did you go to a coding boot camp? Which one? Was it a success? In what ways specifically? Can we see your portfolio? Are you happy?14
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Hey so are we going to get a new State of devRant post soon?
Think it's been more than a year since the last one?
Curious to see how things including users have changed.3 -
What do you do when clients are not able to specify what they exactly want? Do we present them with one or more possible solutions?5
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How can you make a login form in which details are filled via voice? One way is that we can use pyauto gui for fetching coordinates but it's not working as per my wish...8
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I was told it was one brave squirrel that led the attack on our internet today...I hope that squirrel is up and running because we are.
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Need some review about open office , we are shifting to one in next week. Are they good ? Do I need anc earphone ?5
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Day one thesis consultation class. We are required to choose ten topics (I already have top three topics that we will choose from) but we need ten.
I have listed down 9. One more to go!
AND ITS KILLING ME2 -
What the Fun Javascript Part 2
With reference to my old rant : https://devrant.com/rants/1445754/...
An explanation to this...
In JS whenever it sees '==' it has a set of rules that it follows before comparing quantities...
One such rule is...
When we compare a number with a boolean using '==' it first converts boolean into number then compares the two quantities...
So in this case..
When we convert true to number we get 1 and when we compare 1 and 2 they are obviously unequal hence we get false...
1 -
We are building an application using react and redux and now they need the JavaScript profile of the app. Can some one suggest me the guide or docs for understanding flame graphs in Chrome. I searched but things were not clear in the official chrome docs.
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Humans are the one who moves to an area and multiplies. Multiply till the last natural resource is consumed. We are not human. WE ARE MORE LIKE VIRUS.14
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Hope you are washing your hands, now that we are quarantined i can spend more time learning different programming languages, i need it because i have a group of friends making a game, say hi to vindic because he is one of our scripters and the only one to have devrant
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One way I socialize is with walks during work.
Luckily at work we are able to take a good 2-3 15 minute walks a day.
Really helps with the roadblocks and allows me to talk about movies/games/whatever.
Problem is it’s been so hot... so now we always aim for the shade. -
One of our previous clients is not paying the rest of the payments after receiving the codes. What are the things we can/should do digitally to make them pay the payment?
btw, it was a web app. we worked on the front end and the backend of the app. So, naturally we know all the API endpoints, we have the database access, and so on. So yeah, we can do so many things.
But still I wanna ask you guys, what would you do to make someone pay?3
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