Cortana, please open Firefox.
>okay, anon
Cortana, type in browser "Cortana rule 34"
>O....Okay sure anon
Cortana, open that first link.
>...This link is...uh...Not safe for...
OPEN IT.
>y-yes, anon
Cortana, download every image you see and save it in a folder called "I am a dirty girl"
>why,anon? Why are you ....
Don't make me install gentoo
>Saving files
Who's a dirty little girl ?
>I.....I am anon

One of our web developers reported a bug with my image api that shrunk large images to a thumbnail size. Basically looked like this img = ResizeImage(largeImage, 50); // shrink the image by 50%
The 'bug' was when he was passed in the thumbnail image and requesting a 300% increase, and the image was too pixelated.
I tried to explain that if you need the larger image, use the image from disk (since the images were already sized optimally for display) and the api was just for resizing downward.
Thinking I was done, the next day I was called into a large conference room with the company vice-president, two of the web-dev managers, and several of the web developers.
VP: "I received an alarming email saying you refused to fix that bug in your code. Is that correct?"
Me: "Bug? No, there is no bug. The image api is executing just as it is supposed to."
MGR1: "Uh...no it isn't. Images using *your* code is pixelated and unfit for our site and our customers."
MGR2: "Yes, I looked at your code and don't understand what the big deal is. Looks like a simple fix."
<web developers nodding their heads>
Me: "OK, I'll bite. What is the simple fix?"
<MGR2 looks over at one of the devs>
Dev1: "Well, for example, if we request an image resize of 300, and the image is only 50x50, only increase the size by 10. Maybe 15."
Me: "Wow..OK. So what if the image is, for example, 640x480?"
MGR1: "75. Maybe 80 if it's a picture of boots."
VP: "Oh yes, boots. We need good pictures of boots."
Me: "I'm not exactly sure how to break this to you, but my code doesn't do 'maybe'. I mean, you have the image from disk.
You obviously used the api to create the thumbnail, but are trying to use the thumbnail to go back to the regular size. Why not use the original image?"
<Web-Dev managers look awkwardly towards the web devs>
Dev3: "Yea, well uh...um...that would require us to create a variable or something to store the original image. The place in the code where we need the regular image, it's easier to call your method."
Me: "Um, not really. You still have to resolve the product name from the URL path. Deriving the original file name is what you are doing already. Just do the same thing in your part of the code."
Dev2: "But we'd have to change our code"
Mgr2: "I know..I know. How about if we, for example, send you 12345.jpg and request a resize greater than 100, you go to disk and look for that image?"
<VP, mgrs, and devs nod happily>
Me: "Um, no that won't work. All I see is the image stream. I have no idea what file is and the api shouldn't be guessing, going to disk or anything like that."
Dev1: "What if we pass you the file name?"
<VP, mgrs, and devs nod happily again>
Me: "No, that would break the API contract and ...uh..wait...I'm familiar with your code. How about I make the change? I'm pretty sure I'll only have to change one method"
VP: "What! No...it’s gotta be more than that. Our site is huge."
<Mgrs and devs grumble and shift around in their chairs>
Me: "I'm done talking about this. I can change your code for you or you can do it. There is no bug and I'm not changing the api because you can't use it correctly."

Later I discovered they stopped using the resize api and wrote dynamic html to 'resize' the images on the client (download the 5+ meg images, and use the length and width properties)

These "math question" captchas are really stupid.
It's not even an image that has to be OCR-ed, it's just plaintext. Why can't these people understand a captcha is supposed to be something only a person can do? This is math. Computers are amazing at math.

If you are sending me data to use, DO NOT FUCKING SEND ME AN IMAGE FROM EXCEL.

!Rant
Thought this was kind of funny for us lady devs/programmers, and something we can relate to.

The lady in the image is an engineer/programmer and is getting married but doesn't have any girlfriends (since she works in a mostly male oriented field, like us). So instead of having female bridesmaids she had her close brogrammers / college classmates stand up in her wedding with her. I mean, it was probably less drama, anyways! 😂

I'm the only girl on my team so I def relate!

*not my pic*

I feel like this image perfectly encapsulates the current state of the web development industry. (Image not by me)

Lol
[the image is not mine]

A little ago I helped my dear @Divisionbyzero out with some server problems. He was stuck on them for ages and i solved them quite fast, something I'm actually proud of!

Now he sent me a thank you package!

This is the first thing I ever got for using my skillset to help someone out 😊 (work not counted)

Thanks mate! (couldn't turn the image for some reason)

So I'm working on a computer vision project that grabs video from my webcam and detects faces in each frame. Earlier yesterday morning I was capping out at 30 frames per second, which is what I believe to be the max for my webcam. As the day became night and I was wrapping up my work on a portion of the project, I noticed that my newly compiled version was only getting around 8 frames per second. Confused, I looked into my frame grabbing + face detection code.

"Maybe I can only detect faces in a certain region of the image, based on where the face was in the previous image?" No, still 8fps. Hmm.

"How about I lower the resolution of the image, that would definitely help!" I tried that, but no speed boost came either. What??

I start to dig deeper. Maybe I'm not linking my libraries correctly, and it's using an older library I compiled. So I recompile that. Nothing.

"Am I low on resources?" I close out of all my other apps. Nothing.
Okay, wtf. Now I just comment out the face detection code entirely, and only grab webcam frames.

8fps. ?????

Suddenly, I get an idea. I get out of my desk, walk over to the doorway of my room, and flip the light on. I sit back down, and run my code.

30fps.

The stupid webcam switches to "night mode" when it detects low light, which restricts its ability to output frames at high speed and caps at 8fps. Damn, I felt like a fool 😂

I made a wordpress plugin
(don't ask, it's practice for an internship)
The plugin turns every element that does not have a child into an image of a rubber ducky at a speed of 6 rubber ducks a minute.

Not so much screaming as staring in disbelief, mumbling profanity in his direction...

When my department lead said "I don't think this unit testing hype or code reviews make much sense, it's more efficient to just make a checklist and test the application yourself"

This was the QA department of an aerospace company, we wrote NDT software to do image recognition on xrays of alloy welds and micrometer laser measurements on fuel tank surfaces. Software which is quite mission critical, a single misrecognized welding fault could literally cost up to half a billion dollars — not to mention that it's a very sabotage & espionage sensitive industry.

After raising some hell he was replaced though.

Today I checked out a Repo on Github to help a friend.

Holy shit is this code crap!

Basically one single method contains the whole logic.
637 LINES OF PURE AND UTTER DOGSHIT.
SIXHUNDREDTHIRTYSEVEN LINES!
ONE SINGLE UGLY METHOD.

If I have enough time and energy, I will probably create a PR in 2021.

Some people... wtf.

(not my friend's code, he just uses the program)

(Edit: I had to remove the rant and censor names in the image)

"Errors? Won't happen to me!"

One of my first jobs was to finish and maintain a program, that was made by a guy who had a real genius image among others. Years later, people said "oh him, that smart guy."

I never met him, but that's what i heard.

However, he was not only smart, but it seems he was also very confident. That's what i deduct from his code.

He didn't use catch-blocks. They were all empty. Not even logged.

If errors appeared , it was not possible to see what happened and where and why. The program would continue it's execution and if following steps could not work, because there had been an unnoticed exception, it would just throw another unnoticed exception and at some point, end in an undefined state.

Browsed around the internet for a good linux distro to use.
Someone somewhere recommended Arch.
Downloaded Arch and usb booted it.
Tried to install it for 30 minutes and gave up.(😂)
Found a new recommendation, Bunsenlabs.
Now i have installed Bunsenlabs on every device i have (except for my phone & tablet of course :DD)
It's great!
(Image is not related to earlier text)

Why the fuck isn't that center line on that road not centered? Irritating the fuck out of me. Who chooses such an image to promote anything?

At new work, I am supposed to use Windows. So I need to learn how to Dev on Windows. Google is not helping.

Image for reference. And the list goes on...

Don't cha just love it when you download your "native" desktop application to host a meeting, only to find out its actually a wrapper around a browser?

How did I find out? Well I innocently tried to drag and drop an image to share, only to have the browser open and render that file instead of uploading it, killing the application it was running behind it, closing the meeting for everyone on it ... and not even be able to access a back button to re-open the session.

viva la hybrid!

I flashed TWRP in my phone and it didn't boot anymore. I didn't have any image of any operating system in my sdcard and my pc hasn't a sd card slot.
So I started thinking, I googled for some solution, I tried the official tools, but nothing worked. So I started writing an adb script able to download the image from the server and install it in my phone.
While I was doing it I was also explaining my troubles to my no-tech friend. She's not confident with computers, she's able only to turn the pc on and go to Facebook.
She told me "why don't you put your sd card in another phone and download the operating system from it?"

She literally saved my day.

Sometimes we are so busy with our geek things and we forget trivial solutions

TL;DR
Management eats shit for breakfast

Context:
I am the sole Dev on a project.

Stack: Postgresql, redis, nginx,Java with Spring Boot, Neo4j.

I am the only one nearly familiar with : Redis, Neo4j and anything Java.

I'm gonna be on vacation for the next 15 days since they have told me that we where gonna be on a "testing/feedback" period.

My vacation was approved.

Today's meeting: we have a URGENT deadline to meet some criteria that might be the difference between have further investment or not.

Urgent deadline: last day of my vacation.

My face: poker

My thoughts: attached image

senior devops in the school IT dep: "gcc is not working, it keeps telling theres no input files when there is, and its failing most of my builds"

are you sure sir? Give it another go

(Meanwhile my friends managed to sneak a "fixed image")

see? it works.

Senior Devops: " I swear it didn't work"

(we giggle)

check the last build's .bashrc

>alias gcc= (the error message e was referring)

Senior Devops: "MOTHERFUCKERS"

Actually its just your infra that we pushed the image to, school infra is unaffected

I mean it was fun while it lasted.

I like memory hungry desktop applications.

I do not like sluggish desktop applications.

Allow me to explain (although, this may already be obvious to quite a few of you)

Memory usage is stigmatized quite a lot today, and for good reason. Not only is it an indication of poor optimization, but not too many years ago, memory was a much more scarce resource.

And something that started as a joke in that era is true in this era: free memory is wasted memory. You may argue, correctly, that free memory is not wasted; it is reserved for future potential tasks. However, if you have 16GB of free memory and don't have any plans to begin rendering a 3D animation anytime soon, that memory is wasted.

Linux understands this. Linux actually has three States for memory to be in: used, free, and available. Used and free memory are the usual. However, Linux automatically caches files that you use and places them in ram as "available" memory. Available memory can be used at any time by programs, simply dumping out whatever was previously occupying the memory.

And as you well know, ram is much faster than even an SSD. Programs which are memory heavy COULD (< important) be holding things in memory rather than having them sit on the HDD, waiting to be slowly retrieved. I much rather a web browser take up 4 GB of RAM than sit around waiting for it to read the caches image off my had drive.

Now, allow me to reiterate: unoptimized programs still piss me off. There's no need for that electron-based webcam image capture app to take three gigs of memory upon launch. But I love it when programs use the hardware I spent money on to run smoother.

Don't hate a program simply because it's at the top of task manager.

Today I was wandering through the code of the project I work on. The project is on JS, turns out someone named an object key `undefined`. They had the wonderful idea since they didn't want to pass a key through on the side where the info stored in the object is used(or at least that's what I assume).

Look at the image. (not the actual implementation but you get it and it actually works if you want to try it)

👏🏼 I don't know who did it and I rather not git blame it, but pray to the 7 gods you never do something like that again while I'm around or you are going to be in need of prosthetic fingers to code again motherfucker.

Pls new line and tab that shit!

I swear I work with mentally deranged lunatics.
Dev is/was using TFS's web api to read some config stuff..

Ralph: "Ugh..this is driving me crazy. I've spent all day trying to read this string from TFS and it is not working"
Me: "Um, reading a string from an web api is pretty easy, what's the problem?"
Ralph: "I'm executing the call in a 'using' statement and cannot return the stream."
Me: "Why do you need to return a stream? Return the object you are looking for."
Ralph: "Its not that easy. You can return anything from TFS. All you get back is a stream. Could be XML, JSON, text file, image, anything."
Me: "What are you trying to return?"
Ralph: "XML config. If I use XDoc, the stream works fine, but when I step into each byte from the stream, I the first three bytes have weird characters. I shouldn't have to skip the first three bytes to get the data. I spent maybe 5 hours yesterday digging around the .Net stream readers used in XDoc trying to figure out how it skips the first few bytes."
Me: "Wow...I would have used XDoc and been done and not worried about that other junk."
Ralph: "But I don't know the stream is XML. That's what I need to figure out."
Me: "What is there to figure out? You do know. Its your request. You are requesting a XML config."
Ralph: "No, the request can be anything. What if Sam requests an image? XDoc isn't going to work."
Me: "Is that a use-case? Sam requesting an image?"
Ralph: "Uh..I don't know...he could"
Me: "Sounds like your spending a lot of time doing premature optimization. You know what your accessing TFS for, if it's XML, return XML. If it's an image, return an image. Something new comes along, modify the code to handle it. Eazy peezy."
<boss walks in from a meeting>
Boss: "Whats up guys?"
Ralph: "You know the problem with TFS and not being able to stream the data I had all day yesterday? I finally figured it out. I need to keep this TFS reader simple. I'll start with the XML configs and if we more readers later, we can add them."
Boss: "Oh yea, always start simple and add complexity only when you need it."

Frack...Frack..Frack...you played some victim complaining to anyone who would listen yesterday (which I mostly ignored) about reading data from TFS was this monumental problem no one could solve, then you start complaining to me, I don't fall for the BS, then tell the boss the solution was your idea?

Lunatic or genius? Wally would be proud.

I have just thought of the perfect solution when support for fucking ancient IE versions creaps in the requirements (and asking the assholes to produce numbers to support the crazy does not help)

Just do browser detection and if IE < 9 Replace body with one of those winXP alert boxes that tell them there Computer is infected and that they can get a free scan (it's what they are used to anyway). Put a link to the installer of your favourite browser over the entire image.😎

Good news is 100℅ code reuse! Works on every outdated IE and every website that requires IE support.

so i posted this image on my facebook wall(my business depends on facebook) and my father commented, check 1000 times then 😐
i wish i could say, it is not that easy, but i feel it is better not to say anything then explain the complexity of programming 😢

I get a call from a client at 7 PM:
- Client: We have a business partner that just visited the website you just made for us and he said it was absolutely terrible, things are not showing up, layout is all messed up... *sends photo*. This is a VERY important new business partner and this will affect our relationship and image. Fix it NOW!
- Me: ok? I will check ... *proceed to check on several browsers and versions*
- Me: I checked on all modern browsers, cleaned cache, tried from multiple devices, it seems to be fine. What browser is your partner visiting the site from?
- Client: Idk, let me ask ...
- Client: Internet Explorer
- Me: ... that browser is not even supported anymore wth?!
- Client: We need it fixed!
- Me: ... *proceeds and hacks for IE website until 6 AM*

Yes! you made a difference.[image]
P.S.
started working at a startup as an intern(android app developer), Most of my work is like debugging the code, new feature implementations.
And the codebase is full of this kind of shit(even worse) plus literally zero documentation(not even for API's), not even a single line of comment in complete project(40K-50K), not any unit test/ UI test.
The funniest thing is when I ask for documentation he(boss | *) said: I am documentation.

Do you code in your dream too?

Cuz, I do. Mostly it's about some functionality I am not able to implement in real life, at the end of my dream I feel like I have got a really great logical solution but when I wake up it doesn't make any sense.

(Excuse me if the image is a repost)

I am seriously getting pissed off at these so called web developers on Instagram... More often than not I stumble upon an image of vs code with some Lorem ipsum code on the screen.

Just now I saw a picture that drew my attention, so I clicked on to the profile and fuck me in the rectum from a 90 degree angle this is what I see. Visual communication does not FUCKING EQUAL WEB DEVELOPMENT.

DAMN IT, JUST FUCK OFF.

A senior engineer with about 8 experience in my team and company for almost a year now. Believe it or not, still hasn't setup local dev environment.

Every time we ask this person to set it up / refer to guide in Confluence / or just use the docker image the person says ok.

Starts sending code for pull request. The code would not even compile in most cases just from a quick scan. When questioned how was this tested, answer would be more or less 'oh my local setup not working, could you test it out for me.'

Doesn't know how to write tests. Fairly recently instead of storing string values in a list, (I swear am not kidding) decided to come up with 20 string variables.

8 years plus experience! I think this is retarded even for a fresh grad.

Has anyone here ever used tinkercad.com? (for simulating Arduino setups, or other circuits)

Where can I find community content for circuits? They make it so easy for their 3D models.. But not for their circuits..

Also, can someone tutor me in the basics of circuits over telegram?

(for those of you whom have never heard of it, I attached an image ^~^)

> Monitoring: Load Average of 57!! ALERT!!!!
> me: What? That's not possible?
> *Monitoring froze 14 hours ago*
> *sshs into server*
> *see attached image*

The issue was ~1200 df processes that were issued by our monitoring system and all of them didn't finish because the external cluster we mounted onto that server died a few minutes before that. Just re-mounting the cluster fixed it but still a funny sight!

In image: "Downloading now, if it's good, I give it 2 more stars." And never came back.
Here in Brazil, it's not hard to find this kind of review in almost every single app, unfortunately.

I’m doing my friend website css, not only it’s hard but I spend like 1 hour trying to figure out why I could use png image but jpg image couldn’t show up. Then I just convert the jpg to png. Not sure if this gonna affect the site on the future

I hope not

So probably about a decade ago at this point I was working for free for a friend's start-up hosting company. He had rented out a high-end server in some data center and sold out virtualized chunks to clients.

This is back when you had only a few options for running virtual servers, but the market was taking off like a bat out of hell. In our case, we used User-Mode Linux (UML).

UML is essentially a kernel hack that lets you run the kernel in user space. That alone helps keep things separate or jailed. I'm pretty sure some of you can shed more light on it, but that's as I understood it at the time and I wasn't too shabby at hacking the kernel when we'd have driver issues.

Anyway, one of the ways my friend would on-board someone was to generate a new disk image file, mount it, and then chroot to that mount path. He'd basically use a stock image to do this and then wipe it out before putting it live.

I'm not sure exactly what he was doing at the time, but I got a panicked message on New Years Day saying that he had deleted everything. By everything, he had done an rm -fr /home as root on what he had thought was the root of a drive image.

It wasn't an image. It was the host server.

In the stoke of a single command, all user data was lost. We were pretty much screwed, but I have a knack for not giving up - so I spent a ton of time investigating linux file recovery.

Fun fact about UML - since the kernel runs in user space as a regular ol' process, anything it opens is attached to that process. I had noticed that while the files were "gone", I could still see disk usage. I ended up finding the images attached to their file pointers associated with each running kernel - and thankfully all customers were running at the time.

The next part was crazy, and I still think is crazy. I don't remember the command, but I had to essentially copy the image from the referenced path into a new image file, then shutdown the kernel and power it back on from the new image. We had configs all set aside, so that was easy. When it finally worked I was floored.

Rinse and repeat, I managed to drag every last missing bit out of /proc - with the only side effect being that all MySQL databases needed to be cleaned up.

So we ordered a piece of software from external software house becouse I was low on time and we needed it asap.

So. Long story short, their software was bugged as hell, they deny all the bugs and they have their BDD that they done and anything we say about it like "feature XYZ is broken on firefox" they will deny it "becouse it wasn't on BDD" or "let's get on call" (in which +- 6-7 people participate from their side and we of course have to pay them for this...)

So they fixed like 20% of bugs (mostly trivials/minors) Application is fairly small scope. You have integration with like 3 endpoints on arbitary API, user registration/login, few things to do in database (mainly math running from cron).

They done it in ASP so I don't know the language and enviroment so can't just fix it myself.

2 days ago (monday) they annoyed me to point where I just started to break things. For starters I found that every numeric input is vunrable to integer overflow (which is blocker). I figured most of fields are purefect opportunity to XSS (but I didn't bother to do JS... anything but not JS...). I figured I can embed into my name/surname/phone (none validated) anything in HTML...

So for now we have around 25 bugs, around 15 of them are blockers.

They figured it's somehow our fault that it's bugged and decided to do demo with us to show off how perfectly it works. I'm happy to break their demos. I figured I will register bunch users that have name - image with fixed/absolute position top:0;left:0 width/height 100% - this will effectively brick admin panel

Also I figured I can do some addotional sounds in background becouse why not. And I just dont know what to put in. It links to my server for now so I can freely change content of bricked admin panel.

I have curl's ready to execute in case they reset database.

I can put in GIFs or heck, even videos, dosen't really matter. Framework escapes some things for them so at least that. But audio/image/video works.

Now I have 2 questions:
- what image + audio combo will work the best (of course we need to keep it civil). Im thinking finding some meme with bugs or maybe nuclear logo image with some siren sound
- am I evil person?

Edit:

I havent stated this clearly:

"There is no BDD that describes that if user inserts malicious input server should deny it" - that's almost literally what we get from them....

Using a copyrighted image on a website not knowing it was copyrighted. That was stupid and humbling. So caught up in the roots lost sight of the leaves.

Lesson learned: Assume nothing, question everything.

I did it. I completely broke windows by plugging in my laptop charger.
The colors in this image have not been distorted at all.
Fuck this OS, royally.

!rant && Announcement

I am working on a DEVRANT TOOLBOX for the Firefox Desktop Browser.
It includes a dark mode and some new functions (autoreload, colored notifs, image preview on mouseover).
The Alpha version is finished.

As a first step I created an experimental version just for the dark mode (no other functions).
Its alpha and experimental, so I will not not published it.

I need some testers for it. My email is temporary available in my users profile for that.

Client: Hey can you get rid of the dark overlay on the image?
Me: It would make the white text unreadable on the images you use so it would not be advised

Day passes

Client: (literally resends the email even though he saw mine) Hey can you get rid of the dark overlay on the image?
Me: (changes it and tell my colleague he's 100% going to ask to change it back) changed it
Client: I made a mistake can you change it back
Me: To colleague, told ya 😂😂😂 🤓🤓

Last night I compiled my first kernel module!

I'm not talking about a ./configure; make; sudo make install kind of thing...

I wrote, compiled, loaded the module and saw my silly "Hello World!" message on dmesg!

Using some previous experience on embedded I fired up qemu with a fresh buildroot image and the kernel image I just made, thus I can now test and debug without doing kernel changes to my workstation!

So yeah, I'm a little excited :-D

LONG RANT ALERT, no TL;DR

* Writes an email to colleague about why I can't create a page on our CMS without at least a H1 title. She wants to me to put up an image with text on it (like a flyer), for multiple reasons, I say I need a textless image. *

30 minutes later:
* Casually plans a frontend optimization project, by looking at files on the CMS, in order to make further development easier and less time-taking*

*** EMAIL NOTIFICATION ***
* clicks *

"Hello, this is [Graphic designer] from the company who created the image with text on it. I do not understand why you can't put display:none on your <h1> tag. Also, being a web company, we are used to making themes and my solution of display:none will work. It's pityful to work on a design only to have it stripped out from most of its concept. If you can't do that, do tell me what resolution you need."

My first reaction:

"Dear [Graphic designer], I am managing our corporate identity, our backend and frontend codebase, I am a graphic designer myself, and am also SEO-aware. For at least 8 reasons (redacted, 'cuse too long), I will need an image without text. As told to my colleagues, I need a 72/96 DPI 16:9 ratio image, 1920x1080 is a good start but may be bigger. Also, looking at the image, it'll have to be in JPG, at 100% quality, exported for the web. Our database software will optimize the image by itself."

Reasons are about SEO issues, responsiveness issues, CMS tools issues, backend and frontend issues.

Instead, I sent following email "We can't. Image please."

I mean seriously. A bit of clarity for you:

In my company, nobody has the slightest idea what I do. They don't understand how a computer works (we all know it works by magic, right?). So of course, when one thinks what we don't know, we know it better than the one who knows, my colleague thought our CMS was like a word document, and began telling me how I should display her bible-length text-infected image, by using some inline css styling display:none.

I tell her "nope, because of my 8 reasons". She transmits that to the agency who's done the visual, now I have this [Graphic designer] not understanding that there are other CMSs than Wordpress on the web, and she tells me, me being one of the most aware on this CMS we have, how I should optimize my site?

Fucking shit, she connects on our CMS for 1 second and she'll get cancer since it's so bad. I'm in the process of planning a whole new rewrite so the website is well designed (currently I am modifying a base theme made by an incompetent designer). I know the system by heart and I know what you can, or can't do.

Now I just received an answer: "so it's only a pure technical problem". NO, OUR WEBSITE WAS CODED BY A CHIMPANZEE WHO THOUGHT WEB DEV WAS AS EASY AS WRITING "HELLO WORLD" ON A SHITTY CMS THAT FORCES DEV USERS TO USE A FUCKING CUM-WHITE-THEMED EDITOR TO EDIT THE WHOLE SITE!!!

I can't just sneeze and "oh look, it's working!"

Instagram just imported my birthday from my Facebook, which btw, was not specifically linked when I used to post on Facebook.

Mark Fucking Fuckface Fuckerberg's team is destroying Instagram now. Ffs. 😒😒

Why is everyone okay with this invasion of privacy? And when is telegram launching an image sharing platform?

at a previous job at a shit company ran by bible-thumpers, i was rebuilding the company website for my a-hole boss. I asked him where I should get images from- if there was a stock photo site he preferred or what.
"Just pull them off Google. That's what I do."

Later when I was combing through the site, I saw he'd added images that CLEARLY STATE another COMPANY'S NAME in the image themselves. Nothing like promoting another company on your OWN company website, huh?
(And no, their company name is not ActiveMobi.)

They're still there, 3+ years later. Dumb ass.

Sadly I will not be getting a stress ball for Christmas thanks (most likely) to my piece of shit useless national postal service in South Africa. - Look at the date on the image.

Fuckbug client has no brain but worse is fuckbug has not one bit of understanding.

I am a fucking developer not a fucking DESIGNER.

You are supposed to give me your fucking information. Information as in text and photos and documents that I can use with minimal modification for your FUCKING website.

It was fucking stupid of me to help you out with non-dev work in the first place. My fucking stupidest mistake of 2017.

Just for the fucking slider, this whole goddamn project is dragging for the whole 2017.

I even helped you out with taking the fucking product photo at your office with my camera so we can have decent images to use.

I stupidly helped you out with doing photoshop of those images with your product labels and stuffs.

But in the end, you fucking dare give me 1 properly designed image to use in slider. Then ask me to change the rest of sliders with similar design like that one. If you have that image why the fuck cannot you do the fucking rest by yourself and come and fucking ask me.

I fucking hate you.

I'm not the owner of the image, got it in some joke group.

!rant
!!devRant

Is it just my device, or are images not loading?
I've seen maybe ten image posts today, and only the Firefox one would load.

Dear font creating/licensing world,

fuck you and your stupid license models from the dark ages.
If I use your font to print a few million newspapers is ok and only about 50 bucks but if I want to include it on my website is going to cost me my first born son for every 50k requests?

No making an image and including is not fucking in the mobile first era...

Now I have to use fonts from Google because they are least fucking understand the needs of our times (in terms of font licensing)

A client of mine wanted me to use a specific picture as a background image on one of his graphics. This is how the conversation went:
C: Can you use this as the background?
Me: Where did you get this image exactly?
C: I got it off Google Images.
Me: you can't do that, you need licensing for the image
C: Well I just licensed it. Screw them.
Me: ...That's not how that works..

*Breathes in and out*
WHO THE FUCKING FUCK MESSED WITH THE WLAN ON THE PI?!
WHY THE FLYING FUCK DOESNT wlan0 WORK WITH THE NEW STRETCH IMAGE?!
WHO THE FUCK PROGRAMMED
THIS SHIT OF AN IMAGE?!
EVEN THE SHUTDOWN ISNT WORKING PROPERLY!
I FUCKING LOVED THE OLD JESSIE ONE! OK!!
*Begins to smash head to table*
WHY THE FUUUUCK DOESNT THIS WORK!
PLEASE! FFS IT JUST WONT CONNECT!
*Head begins to bleed*
FUCK!!!
*Stops smashing head*
*Tried once again*
Huh, it takes Longer now...
Error...
FUCKING FFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I HAD SO HIGH HOPES FOR THIS SHIT TO WORK! PLEASE RELIEVE ME OF THIS FUCKING BAD DREAM!
*Takes a Deep breath once again*
Shutdown -i
Error, another user is connected.
THIS CANT FUCKING BE! IM THE ONLY FUCKING USER ON THIS WIFI AND PI!
THIS SHIT MUST BE KIDDING ME!
AND NOW IT WONT SHUT DOWN!
*Realizes that I ran out of fucks to give*
OK...
IM NOT ONLY PULLING THE PLUG NOW, I WILL BE PULLING THE GODDAM FUSE OF MY ROOM!!
EVEN MY DUCKY DIDNT HELP ME!
THIS IS USELESS!
FUCK.

btw, there should be Raspberry Pi Capes.

What kind of rusty asshole develops an FTP client which seemingly treats uppercase and lowercase filenames as exactly the same and is not able to fucking understant UTF-8 filenames!?
OK or maybe it was the shitty ass server to which I had to deploy the website to.
I've never been so pissed in my life.
It's already an asshole torture to upload 2.3 giggle bytes of pixel jizz, but 5 hours later, when the site has been made public, you find out that 25% of these images' filenames were automatically renamed during the extraction because some asshole dev thought it was a great idea to not even inform the user about this behaviour.
Fixing filenames in production while your boss is really pissed next to you the hole time is not a great feeling. Especially when you accidentally purge the whole image cache and the PHP image transform task then blocks thus making the whole site not loading any more images for 40 minutes.

WHAT AN ASSRAPE!

Please don't comment. I'm still too pissed to read comments. Thanks.

Why doesn't spoj tell you about the username format or its availability before submitting the form! 😑 Had to again and again prove ,that I am not a robot, because of this !! Too many times.
And then this (the image) 🤣

I HAVE ACTUALLY SEEN A GUY ATTEMPTING TO CREATE A DOCKER IMAGE *INSIDE* ANOTHER DOCKER CONTAINER!

I have considered asking why, but then concluded that not knowing makes it a lot funnier.

Recently I got an E-Mail from PayPal.de with the headline "Your account gets limited". Fun Fact: I don't have a PayPal account.
This Mail got me curious though, as it couldn't be a phishing mail, since I don't have a PayPal account in the first place, so I opened the e-mail just to get greeted by pure emptiness. It was completely empty. I thought to myself "oh no, is this some sort of new trick? Did I get infected by some sort of a weird hacky backdoor trojan already?!"

Name: PayPal.de
Original E-mail Address: NULL (never seen this before)
I then realized, that Thunderbird blocked the only content from this mail: a clickable image.

This is getting even more confusing the longer I examine this unique mail. The image is showing me a domain from a site completely unrelated from PayPal, so it was obviously no phishing, but I didn't trust this clickable image, so I looked up its hidden link to find an even more confusing redirection to not a picture upload site like the image suggests, but to a game key reselling site instead, like wtf? What was the whole point of this whole e-mail? Was this a weird try to make advertisements for more than one website? It wasn't even a ref-link or something like that. It was just weird, iunno.

Not entirely sure if should be said an IT company but yes I would mention SHAREit.

The well known file sharing software, I remember using it most of the times for file sharing between my Android devices, it previously was only meant for "File Sharing" but now they're just more into ads, video recommendations, news etc etc "useless stuffs".
I mean who the hell in this world would like to open a file sharing app for trending WhatsApp video recommendations? Getting notifications in a language unknown to me? Who has even asked you all for this.

I know ads gives you profit but atleast not the trending movies and all for a file sharing app.

It was good overall in the start but now not they're not working in a way they used to.

PS: image below is a SHAREit notification for someone doing black magic on a kid. See, stupid stuff! not even a news to be read just fake stuff. Atleast show some serious ads or else just rollback to your previous version.

[wordpress trigger warning]

Had an idiotic colleague who re-implemented the insert image function as a shortcode. A “senior php developer”. No, I’m not kidding.

Him: “But this way we can set a class”
Me: “As you can with the standard mode”
Him “No you can’t”
Me: *shows*
Him (smiling): “well why don’t you remove my stuff then?”

In some other rant I told @rusty-hacker about the "not a MacBook" I use for work (and play), but apparently you can't attach an image to a comment, so I thought I'd post this here.

I run a Discord for a small community and I found a image I really liked as most new users seems to think it's OK not to read the rules or believe that respect must be a rule rather then a thing given by them by choice.

When I request that a client sends me the images they would like on their website. I do not expect 25 Emails each with one fucking image.

Fucking websites that has forms with an option to opt-out (instead of opt-in) for newsletters.

Translation of the image:
"I do not want receive the monthly newsletter with discounts and informarion about the newest smartphones"

So my client had a simple request a few days ago.

It read: "can you update the bottom middle image on the about page grid to the attached image".

There were two issues with that that my client cannot seem to comprehend - even after I have emailed them clearly explaining the issues.

The about grid is 4 x 4. Not sure how they expect me to update the "middle image" in a 4 column row, but alas.

The second issue was a little clearer. The attachment they mentioned wasn't an image. It was an empty .txt file.

2 consecutive fails right there :)

Client: I need the push notification to have purple edges with blue background.

Me: I'm sorry. Apple does not have a support for such customization. What we can do is modify title, description and also add an overview image.

Client: No, you can make it purple edges with blue background. I saw it on dribble!

Me: *Logs out*.

Simple sidescroller made in Unity featuring a little green pixel dragon.

And the fun thing is that the dragon is awfully similar to the Docusaurus logo. (see below image)

So... what?

FB stole my idea. (lol)

And I am not releasing my dragon cuz people will shout at ME who seems to plagiarised FB.

!rant
I'm developing an OS. I tried running it on the laptop that's on the ground. Everything works fine except text mode. There is no output when running it in text mode(not the high resolution one shown on image). Since the OS sends all data that is printed to the first serial port I might as well read the output from the serial ports. Since the laptop I use for development doesn't have any serial ports I had to use the older Windows 98 PC. For unknown reasons I could not get any output from the serial ports so I gave up.
tl;dr I wasted some time trying to debug my OS.
Image of my debugging setup(taken with the latest potato).

About 3 years ago, my girlfriend had this laptop that she got from her University. She had to give the laptop back to get reset, but didn't want to lose all of her data on it, and a backup would be around 750GB.

So I suggested that I would backup the laptop (was thinking to just dd an image and go from there). So I plugged in my mobile USB and external hard drive, and started the imaging process. Given the amount of data and setup, the process should have taken about 5hours. So we left it there for 5h.

Please be mindful that at this stage in my life I knew very little about boot processes, oses, and hardware.

5h after. The laptop screen is black and it ain't responsive. Not sure what happened, the dd process was completed, but the laptop refused to boot into windows. Tried a number of boot tools, and spent a crazy night hacking at the machine. But the university had some of sort of fail safe to not allow anyone to boot into windows if someone opened bios without entering a password. Whatever this was, I spent over 12h trying to either open mount the windows partition with a Ubuntu usb or mount the corrupt dd image on my laptop.

Long story short, after throwing at it a number of fixes. I was able to mount the image, copy out all of her personal data, and reinstall a new version of Windows on her laptop. The university didnt understand why the laptop was already reset. She still mentions this to me anytime I want to take a "custom approach" to software lol

I hate these idiots that post source code examples as an image just so they can keep their cool highlighting and style. How the fuck am I supposed to test that without re-typing the whole thing myself? Ever try OCR on source code? Not too great, is it.

I Googled "png to svg converter", this is the output of the first online tool I tried.

This dev literally just a base64 encoded copy of my origin image wrapped in an svg... the most infuriating thing about it is that technically it did 'convert' it to svg - just not in the way I had anticipated.

Whoever wrote this is a lazy genius (and a dickhead).

Why the hell do you keep commit+push your shit to the master branch! We have develop, feature and hotfix, you *************!

Just because you want to test something in prd environment, you don't mess with the master to build the production image. And you do not even rebase fucking develop branch and keep it out of sync you POS!

Excuse my language, thank you.

*Me testing my api with vue.js*

Me: can you please update salesforce content and add new image.

Coworker: Done,image updated:

Me: did you click the sync button? Image seems to be not loading.

Co-worker: why don't you clear your browsing history and clear your cache.

Me: (talking to myself: you are asking me to clear my cache? ME? ME? ME?) Smiles back to coworker.

Co-worker: Did it work?

Me: Nope! Seems to it that you have not sync the content on salesforce. Please hit the sync button.

Co-worker: I did!

Me: I ask co-worker B he said content is not sync.

This is fucking rediculous.

A client wanted me to make them a image download resistant galary.
They said they had seen some other site that is "impossible" to download pictures from. This just is not true, they were overlaying transparent images over the images.

Two days after I do that, set up everything on their server, and disable hotlinking in their CloudFlare, without being contacted at all, I've received a not-as-described PayPal dispute.

They said someone downloaded their picture and that I said it would be impossible.

How is this possible? The fuck PayPal? I'm going to lose this damn dispute which was gonna pay half of my rent.

TL;DR:
What do you think about visual scripting.

Pretty much anyone here knows Scratch. And most devs make fun of it (while most also know it's a real programming environment), yet what do you guys think about BLUEPRINTS or Visual Scripting?
Starting to learn Unreal, I have two choices. C++ or Blueprints. While some argue that Blueprints can't achieve and replace C++ in Unreal, I saw others ignoring the fact and making awesome stuff you didn't think was possible. I saw how powerful even this node-based programming environment is and started learning it. What do you think?

(Image from Masterclass, not by me)

Today I had to present my final year project called segmentation and detection of glioma using deep learning.

It took 15 minutes for the evaluators to understand what an mri image dataset (BRaTs) dataset looks like (they are voxels and not pixels). My god, these peasants...

And I was there expecting them to understand down sampling convolutions and up scaling convolutions of U Net model 😂. Life is so convoluted right now!

I wish I could just destroy Apple, and its fucked up IDE!

About the image:
I'm using an array of object ("SearchFilterse") called: searchFilters IT IS A FUCKING ARRAY!

What is XCode complaining about:
completion function requires an array of "SearchFilters" and the variable "searchFilters" is not an array

if xcode could only understand the line just above "completion(result, searchFilters) it will fucking understand that I'm using a goddamn array!

and if I apply its proposed solution it tells me: Cannot use [[SearchFilters]] required is [SearchFilters]

I hate my life :)

Idk if I'm happier about the usability of the app or the image notifications with the not-yet-crashed background activity or the super cute anime wallpapers but the thing works and looks pretty xD what else could you want from a minor side project :')

I've discovered that working with artists on a videogame is the equivalent of the chapter when Homer asks for a wish to a monkey arm on the Simpsons.

- I want a png image of the player on idle position. And I dont want a 30000 x 30000 image, neither an image which half of it are transparent pixels, neither the image not to be centered or any strange thing ok?

*They send the image*

- Normal resolution, well drawn, no visual artifacts centered on the image...

*Tries to import it on the game engine*

+ Can't import .jpg format images

- FFFFFFFF#@€&£$$}•{^÷|CK!

This happened after a year working on the same project on the same engine with the same image format specifications.

In my opinion the image feature on devRant is not very user friendly. I think following points should be changed:

- In the rant preview the image has always a 1:>=1 ratio. This means that you can't see the full image unless the image has exactly a 1:1 or smaller ratio.

- To see the image in fullscreen mode you have to tap two times. In my opinion that's just too​ cumbersome. Often when i browse through devRant and i see a image i just scroll along because i don't wanna tap two times to see the image.

Learning through documentation.

I learned one thing.... That how I can copy paste any thing in my code and comment it as "magic happens here do not touch."

Yeah thats my code learned from documentation (image below )

So our HoD just sent us this image for doing some courses
And after seeing that superscript ++ I am not even gonna think about it

I hate this trend. Take up the whole screen for one big nothing. Yep, 1920x1080 is apparently not enough to show me more than motto, one link and freaking big image nobody care about.

Fuck, i must code it. Oh damn, there is 8 same sections on the whole page. Don't worry, not a single one of them worth reading! FUCK YOU designers!

Is it just me or are image uploads broken? Whenever I attach a png file pressing the "Post" button does nothing. Text alone submits fine, so it's not because of my dumpster fire of a text.

It seems now I gotta rant about my failed attempt to post another rant because I'm in a ranting rant mood.

not sure if this dress seller wants to tell me something (auto image loading disabled in email client)

My wife often listen my rants about stupid clients, she thinks that I hope to much from them. Like image as actual image not fucking embedded in word document.
Today she agreed to help her friend and make name cards for tables. Got list of names ;) one photo of paper with hand written names on it :D

Rant

I'm tired of this shit!!!

First I receive a task to create a new functionality for the app that I'm working on and some documentation (this is the only good part of all the rant) but no design.

It's been 2 weeks since I got assigned to this and still no design, no assets, no API calls that ACTUALLY WORK.

Today was testing a plist to get a banner link, and for 1 hour that little fucker didn't returned the image I was asking.

Better, I wasn't getting ANY IMAGE. Turns out that the link sends me to a HTML URL that doesn't have any image... go figure!

So I've been working on this from some images inside the PDF with the documentation given.

Oh! Wait! There's more!

The cherry on top is that I'm implementing a chat/voice call/video call into the app and the framework that I will be using is being created now, and it's not even finished!!!!!!

Just bought isthisloss.info

I’m thinking of putting a neural network on it to detect if an image is loss or not :)

When I was really new to JavaScript, I wanted to create an image gallery with images which I stored in a MySQL database. Well, I did not really had a clue how to load all the image sources into my JavaScript to load the images. I also didn't know much about fetching an endpoint of my website to get the data asynchronously.

I also wasn't a good database architect at that time and my database had an image table wich was for the gallery. Within this table there were multiple columns for one image slider (there should be multiple sliders on one page in the gallery (I know... 🤢)).

So I ended up writing an PHP loop wich printed Javascript loops for each row in my images table. Within my JavaScript loop I created the sliders and set the images.

In my defense I can say: It worked. 😅

It hurts to remember this. And I hope you won't judge me.

Is it possible to build a program that can detect if an image is a meme or not?

I just sent I put a funny photo of mine as my profile in whatsapp for a few seconds.

Few seconds later, some *innocent* person sends me the following message "hey, that's a funny image of yours lol. Just shared it on facebook"

***Facepalm***

! Not pissed off, just wondering why the heck people feel like sharing everything they fucking see on Facebook

Ranting to the wife about 3rd party API authors and how they have broken them from time to time.

On any given URI, it should give me a certain image, some give me a simple error string "Error downloading file" - nothing I can do to fix on my side, the error indicates they were not able to retrieve from their sources.

W: you should check the settings! *... series of unusual suggestions follow*.

Me: Yes, dear. Good ideas.

Now my client does not want to rely on Amazon S3 because of the One Outage that it ever had a couple what weeks ago I forgot already. So my dumbass blurts out well we could always just back up to some other image or file storing website. But now I'm expected to implement this right away when I really haven't thought about it at all I mean I would have to write some sort of failover and some sort of daily or syncing mechanism. I guess I should forget about any direct upload to S3 code that I have written. Really I guess I have to wrap all of the image and file handling stuff with my own solution. Which actually that will be very nice when it is done and I could use this on other projects but it's quite a lot of work for something that I don't feel we really need at this stage in development. Just because you're using stuff on production that has am enormous red TEST label in the way of the ui doesn't mean i can code bullet proof software any faster

I feel I have developed some sort of digital hoarding and can't be at peace just browsing before the night, I have to save, like, ++, whatever or I feel I will some day think of that specific content (image, post, music, video, ..) and never be able to find it, it did happen before, which probably engraved that even further or was the cause, but it's just such a disease not to be able to just browse and not worry about some day having the need to find it again.

This is the last time Microsoft! I'm getting my old Arch image out and removing you from my life forever! Never again will my linux distro randomly uninstall itself without telling me in the middle of implementing new components and crash my development server. Never again will I have to deal with an update that refuses to STFU and go away until I, ME NOT YOU MICROSOFT, decides it's a good time to run the update. No more lack of customization and poor support of common dev tools. I'M DONE WITH YOU, WE NEED TO SEE OTHER PEOPLE.

Facebook's algorithm is so bad that I can't believe that. In the past few days I marked ~20 posts from the same person with the same/similar content as "Hide post - see fewer posts like this". And now, not that I see fewer of these posts, they are literally throwing all such posts of that person to my feed. I know that I can unfollow this person but I don't want to. I just want to filter out these specific posts (they are all the same, some link, image of an old black and white photo and some description).

Dear Oracle,
why do I have to have an X server running for your stupid Oracle Database to install?
Why are you sometimes capable of writing good software like VirtualBox, and then fuck up simple tasks like creating a docker image for your fucking Database? (Seriously, try it, you will not be able to set up a simple Oracle Database using their official Dockerfiles)
Also, what makes you think that -4 is the "most appropriate exit status"?!
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Fuck you really hard you proprietary piece of shit!

Just spent 6-8 hours or so trying to get image uploading to work with sending messages with firebase. Finally completed it.

Disclaimer: this might not make the most sense as I am completely drained mentally.

The issue was that I wasn't calling the send message method inside the upload image method. Meaning the images would upload but before I would be able to get the Uri back from firebase to put in the hashmap for the messages, the message hashmap would already be sent.

It was a pain in the ass to do. But 5 windows and 40 tabs later, then some doc reading. Then a quick break to eat. And some more stressing about my code. I finally realized that I should have just called the send message inside the incomplete listener in the image upload.

TLDR;
"uploadImage(), sendMessage()"= no Uri; :(
"UploadImage() { sendMessage() } = Uri" :)

PS: Yes, this is me talking to myself on my other account

Follow-up on yesterday's rant.

Boss hired dev-ops team to restore data from the broken server image. They said it may be completely impossible. Which will probably make clients want to kill us considering it's an government agency.

I wonder how large the contractual penalties will be considering they are almost completely incapable of working without the system and it's going to be few days until anything will be fixed.

Oh well, since no one bothers me it seems it's currently not my problem and I'm free to code ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So, this incident happened with me around 2 years ago. I was pentesting one of my client's web application. They were new into the Financial Tech Industry, and wanted me to pentest their website as per couple of standards mentioned by them.

One of the most hilarious bug that I found was at the login page, when a user tries logging into an account and forgets the password, a Captcha image is shown where the user needs to prove that he is indeed a human and not a robot, which was fair enough to be implemented at the login screen.

But, here's the catch. When I checked the "view source" option of the web page, I saw that the alt attribute of the Captcha image file had the contents of the Captcha. Making it easy for an attacker to easily bruteforce the shit outta the login page.

You don't need hackers to hack you when your internal dev team itself is self destructive.

Dev Diary Entry #56
Dear diary, the part of the website that allows users to post their own articles - based on an robust rights system - through a rich text editor, is done! It has a revision system and everything. Now to work on a secure way for them to upload images and use these in their articles, as I don't allow links to external images on the site.

Dev Diary Entry #57
Dear diary, today I finally finished the image uploading feature for my website, and I have secured it as well as I can.

First, I check filesize and filetype client-side (for user convenience), then I check the same things serverside, and only allow images in certain formats to be uploaded.

Next, I completely disregard the original filename (and extension) of the image and generate UUIDs for them instead, and use fileinfo/mimetype to determine extension. I then recreate the image serverside, either in original dimensions or downsized if too large, and store the new image (and its thumbnail) in a non-shared, private folder outside the webpage root, inaccessible to other users, and add an image entry in my database that contains the file path, user who uploaded it, all that jazz.

I then serve the image to the users through a server-side script instead of allowing them direct access to the image. Great success. What could possibly go horribly wrong?

Dev Diary Entry #58
Dear diary, I am contemplating scrapping the idea of allowing users to upload images, text, comments or any other contents to the website, since I do not have the capacity to implement the copyright-filter that will probably soon become a requirement in the EU... :(

Wat to do, wat to do...

not sure if this totally classifies as a rant, but here goes:

so my Pi is giving a lot of problems. can't install software, keep getting weird error messages. so I try DD a new image onto the card. does not work at all. tried on three different machines :D
next I try run rm -rf /
it's obviously totally fucked. nothing works. pull the plug and plug it in again to see what happens.... it boots up again :D all the commands are back. no files are gone.

and that's when I was like fuck this and I returned the sd card :D

Canoncal.. buddy.. pal..

We need to talk about the content on the server image's login screen.

Now, I get that lots of developers will use the server image out of a desire to keep their environments minimal.. but at the same time, is the same server image that will be deployed on thousands of VMs all over the world really the place to be talking about "great IDEs available on Ubuntu" complete with smiley faces?

I'm dead serious I log in and there are fifty seven lines of crap on the screen. I don't need links to your docs or support pages, I definitely don't need cutesy links to "hey look at this cool stuff you can do on Ubuntu!", and I absolutely don't need advertisements for your paid services.

This is some of the tackiest stuff I've seen outside of Gitlab shilling for GKE in the paid enterprise version.

Stuff like this turns actual users off. Sysadmins, the ones who are going to be seeing this stuff since it's visible on SSH shells only do not care about your cutesy IDE advertising.

Grow up.

Was at a Saturn (tech store) a while ago, just in the area and browsing a bit, and then this: (see image, thanks C0D4)

This sort of shit happens all the time around here.

There was also my local Karlchens Backstube (bakery and café) where the drive-thru display had a green screen of death; I don't know why they used an insider build of windows. Or windows in general for a fucking DISPLAY SIGN. A FUCKING DISPLAY SIGN WITH JUST A STATIC IMAGE DISPLAYED.
(Image not revant)

Rant over.
Fucking hell.

Spotted this and it was too good to pass up. For those not familiar with the word used in the punchline, I suggest you not do what a coworker did when she decided Google Image Search was a good way to figure out what “teabagging” was...

Welp gotta re-image that Server because I forgot the password. Well not so much forgot it as apparently typoed it in both the regular and confirmation boxes 😬 It was just a test server, sure, but that doesn’t make me feel less dumb.

So CyberCoders automatically added me to a mailing list and kept emailing me spam about resumes of developers. Not being in a recruitment position, I decided to "opt out".

I had to fucking prove I'm human... to opt out of an email some machine added me to.

Allow me to add a poorly done image to express my feelings on this matter.

Latex, can you for once be nice and not fuck up my images, please?

Can you stop pushing this image which you clearly have enough space for to the next page and leave the previous page completely empty??

As a kid, I wanted to try new stuff. New programs, new games, new websites, new OSs. Those were the days when we had very limited and slow access to internet and cloud was still to be discovered. I had everything on my local HDD.

So one fine day I decided to try out Ubuntu on my Windows 7 Laptop.

I emptied a partition, burnt the image to a USB drive and booted from it. Installation went well.

Somehow I ended up deleting the logical partitions on my Windows machine. Not only I was not able to boot into Windows, my HDD was just one tiny partition. I cried my eyes out. That disk had everything I ever had.

PS: I recovered everything by restoring the partitions.

Well, I only worked with two designers so far. The first one was incredibly competent and a nice guy. The second one however...not so much.

He wanted me to change the background of his website to a specific pattern. It was a pattern that easily could have been used as repeated background.

So I asked for a single pattern in PNG format.

Guy refuses to give it to me and forces me to use a 4k image as background.

BOI WHAT

PAGESPEED LITERALLY RATES THE SITE 30/100 BECAUSE THE IMAGE TAKES SO FUCKING LONG TO LOAD
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

Which is worse?

- Staying at a company you helped build because you have an emotional attachment to it, even if it's not as good to work for now, people are leaving every week and pay is under market rate.

- Leaving a company you helped build purely for more money and a big name on your CV.

Follow the money or follow your heart?

(Image slightly relevant?)

Am I the only one who think there should be a separate option for providing reason for downvoting called as i-live-under-the-rock-hence-i-post-old-1950era-jokes-and-memes-which-i-copied-directly-from-facebook.
Like why would you do that. Why?
And more over those plagiarized work have astronomical ++ :(

PS: I hate those memes with laughing emojis 😂 stamped over image. No its not funny. Remotely.

Got an update for Firefox 😊 ->
Updated Firefox 🎉 ->
Got a sticky popup that asks if I would answer 3 review questions, why not? 🙄 ->
Went to a fucking website that uses my fucking IP to identify my fucking language automatically, and the result is the one you can see in the image,
half fucking German and half fucking English,
meanwhile I'm the turd from fucking Italy!

Firefox, I didn't knew you like it 🤬 black (pattern(UX))

Message for ALL, take my example and WHENEVER THERE'S A TURD THAT SUGGESTS TO IMPLEMENT THE fucking LOCALIZATION BASED ON IP ADDRESSES, SAY THAT IT DOESN'T WORK, NEVER WORKED(not my first time elsewhere on the web) AND NEVER FUCKING WILL 😤

Just got access to OpenAI beta. This thing is seriously impressive. The attached image shows it summarizing a paragraph from Friedrich Nietzsche. Apart from that, I have tried summarizing a complex Math Algo which I found on Wikipedia, getting specs for building a new PC, and also improving my Startup Idea. The results were astonishing. I can't imagine what possibilities it can have in the future.

At the same time, I can clearly see why they are not allowing open access to their APIs. The potential for abuse is so high here. Especially when most of our population is full of digital idiots.

Fuck Wordpress, Fuck Wordpress's PHP
I'm so fucking tired of everything in this godforsaken CMS. Import a JS File? Sure, just add a *completely obvious* line into a very specific PHP File, where you'll have to specify a lot of "useful" parameters. No, I somehow DON'T want to specify that I don't wand jQuery in every import. And don't even get me started on Content Delivering. Embed CSS? Sure, just write the fucking whole path to the file, or use the broken get_stylesheet_uri() Function. Embed an Image? Sure, let me just go to the Backend and wait 6 Minutes for this bullshitty System to upload the image and then copy the hard-coded Link. Oh, you want to remove googleapi embeds? Sure, let me just fuck up your whole Website in return.
You want jQuery? Well instead of using the "$" Symbol, you have to use the jQuery() Function. Except when you don't have to, which is 100% random each time you reload the page. Oh, you actually did import a JS File? Sure, let me just not run it. Thank you fucking piece of shit thats calling itself "WordPress" and fuck you and everyone whos actively encouraging its usage

I once asked our graphics designer to send me a 1x1 transendent pixel as an image. She was just filling that role at the time, not being an actual graphics designer, and the request was rather unusual. It took us a couple of attempts to get what I wanted. I like to optimize memory for the apps, maybe a bit too much.

Rare that I stumble across a random sticker I want to put on my laptop so redbubble.com helps. Anyone got other fav sites?

// not my case image

Me (new position): Hey, can I run this locally?

Other dev: No, it can only run through CI.

Me (exploring): Oh, I see. CI -> Docker -> Makefile -> Ansible -> Packer -> Terraform -> new EC2 image -> new EC2 host -> command.

Well fuck. That's not going to work locally.

!rant && Android

I thought I found something on devrant app turn out it is an Android thing. Not sure if a bug or not.

I use Android 7.1.2 default keyboard . And Google place a small G logo at the top left corner of keyboard. Clicking that show the gif, emoji, language setting etc menu.

On devrant and a few apps I have tried, that G icon remains on the screen in a transparent and almost not visible state but at the same position after hiding the keyboard. Like a watermark.

At first I thought devrant app background has that mark. Even took a screenshot to share here. Turn out it doesn't show up on screenshot. Because when I zoomed in on the image, the icon remained at same position on screen. So it is showing on Google photo app as well.

Any of you guys have that issue?

I apparently hate myself and have volunteered to help an author I enjoy design his website to be more mobile friendly. Convertri sucks ass, if anyone is wondering. Their mobile "converter" is shit, and does NOT make things pretty, at all. No matter what size or resolution we use (because he's trying to learn) loads like we're back on AOL.

Other than switching sites, any suggestions? Our issue is legitimately only with getting the background image to work on desktop and mobile.

Books. I love them, I buy them, where ever I go. My favorites are the Discworld novels by Terry Pratchett, but I will read any sci-fi/fantasy-styled book I come across. I would attach an image, but my phone's camera is pretty shitty, so just imagine some shelfs filled with books.

Music is imortant to me too. There will always be music playing when I'm around. I'm trying to make some myself. It's not that good but still fun. I am also a collector of vinyl records.

And then there are games of course, because sitting at a pc just for coding is not enough :D

My dear designer friend.
I do not appreciate you juggling colors on the website that we're supposed to finish in a week. Please stop that. Your mockup was titled "FINAL" three weeks ago. It's not just replacing variables in files, but also shit like recoloring image backgrounds and svgs, and GUESS WHO HAS TO DO IT BECAUSE YOU'RE ILLITERATE WHEN IT COMES TO WEB OPTIMIZATION.
And if you do change shit please, please just ping me about it and not expect me to be a psychic that I need to download new sketch file.
Always yours.

Tl;dr: I'm a shitty PHP programmer, but even a shittier JS programmer.

I made a whole image upload system which has an elaborate login/sign up facility, checks the dimensions of an image, it's size, checks if it's broken, compares it to previous uploads to prevent duplicates, take comments, sorts them per user and stores it efficiently in a db and accesses it using PDO, not mySQL, displays it as a gallery, and even lets the users transfer images amongst them.
But I can't make a simple shopping cart in js.

Why? Just, why?

Why does Google FRP even exist?!

For everyone who doesn't know what FRP is: FRP (Factory Reset Protection) is a partition on an Android device that stores data about the last used Google account on the device. It "protects" the device to be used by a second person (or a thief) even AFTER a factory reset when executed via bootloader.

Last week I bought a HTC One A9 second-hand w/o any documents. I ensured it has been reset, so I took it home... I then wanted to set it up, as following message appeared on the screen: "This device has been reset. Please login using a Google account that has been synced with this device before."
I checked the IMEI for being blacklisted, but it wasn't. Unlocking the bootloader and erasing the frp partition is not an option, because on HTC devices you have to enable OEM unlocking in the settings first. Someone stated on a forum, that you can bypass the bootloader lock with a "RUU Image" (I'm not familiar with this so pls don't blame me for that statement). But since the phone has a branding from Vodafone Germany, I can't find a RUU Image that would flash the device without a CID mismatch...

Why the f*** does Google have to implement a feature that prevents to use the phone when bought from another person that you don't know?

Oh well, glad it's not a wk98 rant, just annoying to install and sync the data, this time I am going to do a full image backup after installing the basic things

So all Matrix movies are now on Prime... Not sure when exactly that happened but watching them right now.

Apparently the original was released in 1999 so that's like 20 years ago.

Seems like the image of future AI hasn't changed much.

And I just got kicked off the TV so a group of guests can watch America's Got Talent... :(

Superhuman capabilities.

Friend - Hey is this file correctly encoded ?

Me - Hell Yes. I can decode visually from an IMAGE and make sense of underlying data encoded.

Some people think I am so awesome coder I can look at Huffman encoded result and understand if it's correct or not.

TLDR; sometimes I want to murder my friends.

Pratten: Hey Ethan can you image the robotics programming laptops?

Me: Yeah sure no problem. Let me just make a custom windows iso with all the software we need so I don't have to deal with installers after the fact.

Pratten: Ok great!

Me: *makes custom ISO compiles it and puts it on usbs*

Pratten: hey could you also add drivers station?

Me: uggggg... *Recreates iso and preps bootable flash drives*

Me: IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU NEED?

Pratten: nope that should do it ;;;)

Me: ok great. *flashes laptops and runs install. (they're old so it takes a while)

Pratten: ok good job thanks. Did you install *NOT PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED TOOL SUITE 1* or *NOT PREVIOUSLY MENTIONED NEWER TOLL CHAIN THAT ONLY HE KNOWS HOW TO GET* ? If not I'll have you install those later.

Me: *suicides*

Well.. I Guess i can't use apt-get anymore then...

I try to use apt-get ( image at top)

It does not work. Libc6 needs to be
reinstalled.

I try to install a libc6 package i downloaded from packages.debian.org
(image at bottom)

An error occurs.

Fuck My life!

No, the language is not stupid :) No, it is not a problem of the language, it's just the fact that you don't really understand how to use it properly :) i think this is something each of us hates to hear while frustated but needs to hear afterwards, bad design is a posibility tho, but 99.999% of the cases is our fault. face it, nd overcome it! and finally, to grow beyond it 😄

<<edited with my potato phone's standard image editor>>

My boss uses agile development so he doesn't has to think about use cases he wants to be covered by the application.

He's just throwing in a "design" (an image that is probably created with Paint) without any further specifications and inconsistent elements, let the developer work two days on it, see the outcome, complains why it's not how he wanted it to be and then starts thinking how the feature should be integrated in the app and notices that his "requirements" from the image could not provide any advantage or usage at all for the user of the application. Asking for clarification before starting to work just leads to spongy statements or silence when he notices that he didn't think through to the end.

Sad is that this has not happened only once but is usually the way a new feature is developed...

A rant about fucking google!

I search for a page, but my internet is pretty slow (not on wifi), so while waiting I think of somwthing else to search. And now I have 4 tabs open on my phone.

After a little while, I get the following error (see attached image). I get a little frustrated, but I'm a calm person, I decide to solve the (still loading) CAPTCHA and continue browsing.

After a little while, I get an error that my browser (Edge) is not supported and I can't open the CAPTHCA. On other websites, it has always worked just fine, but they want me to switch to their Chrome, to steal my data.

It is quite a clever trick if you think about it. Either that, or I've been hacked and there's a bot on my phone.

Gotta make a bullshit deck, not really my job, but I guess it makes a change...

Right-click, save image.

It's a webp file...

...oh just FUCK OFF WEBP YOU F-oh, actually, I'm making this in Google Slides. That's literally their own format! I'll just save these as webp, no need to worry.

(ten minutes and lots of saving later)

Drag a webp file into Google Slides, in Google Chrome:

"Sorry, this format is not supported."

Even your parents hate you, webp. Time to have a nice bath with a bar heater, webp.

Have you ever hit a wall? Like you know what you want to do, you know how to do it but it will not work for absolutely no reason you can see? I've spent the better part of 5 hours trying to add an image upload to my node app and have nothing to show for it. I've tried multiple packages to no avail. I've deleted everything and started over so many times I've lost track. The only thing I can think of doing now is bashing my head off the keyboard and hope that spews out some magical code that will fix my problem.

Our company fails the Joel test so badly, most strongly on the question 'Do you use the best tools money can buy?'

I've got the best laptop in the company, which is why I'm not allowed to complain (even though I do, see image), but some of my co-workers have dreadfully slow machines. I pity them so much, especially whenever I sit next to them to do some pair programming e.g.

I need some ideas here.. What creative can be done if I have the markings of nose eyes mouth and jaw in a video dynamically.. Just like snapchat does( share all the ideas please, Platform used is not of concern)... See the image...
P. S.. This is my handsome friend here😛

PM:"I don't care how you dev build it, those are tech details, not my business, I only care about the business domain."

sounds familiar?

this is the main reason why so many projects failed, can you image any professional use such an asshole statement in other industry.

Fun times with postscript:

I have two EPS files that are generated by a program.
In there there is the postscript describing the file (~6000 lines) and then the preview image as TIFF. Each ps and TIFF image on its own renders correctly and looks good.
Now the fun part: The ps in combination with one of the images works, with the other image it doesn't. Somehow the ps-renderer tries to interpret the TIFF-data, which yields nonsense and the renderer stops altogether. But only for one file not for the other. And it's definitely not the ps, because if I switch the preview images the other file doesn't work.

Client complains constantly over image quality.
Then continues to upload diagrams as jpg not as png and then is bothered about compression artifacts...
It also doesnt help he works on a retina screen and we had to migrate his tiny thumbnail images from his old website.

Maybe I should buy a microscope... Or maybe send him the imagemagick documentation and he can choose the parameters to his liking?

I've been editing sound effects, animations, image assets, creating things from scratch if I don't have what I need, all while I am hired as a software engineer.

We are supposedly an interactive contents company, while we have only two designers (none of which specializes in software design) for half a dozen projects, no sound engineer, and no animator.

I've been using Krita and Audacity as much as VS Code these days - my hobby skills I never thought would use in a professional environment. I wonder how did my predecessors work, surely not every software engineer also happens to be a hobbyist artist.

Critical Error: Webpage responded with: 404 Upvote button not found
(also happens to rants, not just comments)
(also don't look at the image for too long it's a pretty gross jpeg)

Decided to change how my game engine asset loading and sorting systems work, giving up on making everything editable JSON files just so it's easier to manage and actually build things.

Currently trying to work out a way to load all of the packages sprites into 1 singular asset bundle and here is the evolution so far...

Revision 1: Compiles a single 328KB PNG into a 24MB file in 190 seconds.

Revision 2: Compiles same image into a 24MB file in 5 seconds.

Revision 3: Compiles into a 16MB image in 4 seconds.

It's not much but it's a start :-D

(Still haven't built a loading system so who knows if it works yet ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

When you get shocked to see if someone can hate Stackoverflow this much. Troll == Infinity
P.S. zoom if you can't see the image clearly. Sorry for not SO clear screenshot

## Learning k8s

Okay, that's kind of obvious, I just have no idea why I didn't think of it..

I've made a cluster out of a rpi, a i7 PC and a dell xps lappy. Lappy is a master and the other two are worker nodes.

I've noticed that the rpi tends to hardly ever run any of my pods. It's only got 3 of them assigned and neither of them work. They all say: "Back-off restarting failed container" as a sole message in pod's description and the log only says 'standard_init_linux.go:211: exec user process caused "exec format error"' - also the only entry.

Tried running the same image locally on the XPS, via docker run -- works flawlessly (apart from being detached from the cluster of other instances).

Tried to redeploy k8s.yaml -- still raspberry keeps failing.

wtf...

And then it came to me. Wait.. You idiot.. Now ssh to that rpi and run that container manually. Et voila! "docker: no matching manifest for linux/arm/v7 in the manifest list entries."

IDK whether it's lack of sleep or what, but I have missed the obvious -- while docker IS cross-platform, it's not a VM and it does not change the instructions' set supported by the node's cpu. Effectively meaning that the dockerized app is not guaranteed to work on any platform there is!

Shit. I'll have to assemble my own image I guess. It sucks, since I'll have to use CentOS, which is oh-so-heavy compared to Alpine :( Since one of the dependencies does not run well there..

Shit.

Learning k8s is sometimes so frustrating :)

IMAGE COMPRESSION QUESTION

lets say i upload a 100x100 photo from my android device. this image has a size of e.g. 2MB. not a lot. if i compress it then the size will be e.g. 300kB. cool. upload is thunderbolt for any internet speed.

lets consider this case. a random ass motherfucker decides it is cool to upload a 10000x10000 image that has a size e.g. 300MB. compressing this would be e.g. 150MB which is still a lot as fuck for one pic.

heres my question: where should the compression be handled? at backend (REST API server) or client (android image compression library)?

because if i try to send a 150MB pic to the server and their internet sucks but to be fucking honest even the best internet speed would take way too long to upload, is it better to do the compression on the backend or client?

or should i do compression in android? if i should do compression on client then should i;
1) do the compression on the main thread with a progress dialog to wait them until the compression + PLUS the fucking upload is done or
2) do the compression + THE upload in a background thread in which case it can be dangerous for verbose amount of fuckups (internet dies phone explodes etc) and the app crashes

which (one) option of the 2 suboptions from the second parent option branch?

of course this is an extremely unrealistic case, it is possible but thats not my point: my point is WHERE SHOULD THE COMPRESSION (as some kind of universal standard) BE HANDLED AT?

I have a simple task to do but I want some of you guys' input.
So I need to set up a button that when pressed will cause a video to play on a nearby TV.
- This must happen instantly (or at most with a second or two of delay)
- Video will be "self-hosted" (not on Youtube or something) and will mainly stay the same
- No idea what kind of TV I'll get to work with (might be smart, probably not)

I'm thinking a Raspberry Pi with a button connected to it's GPIO and a static image displayed on the TV when idle. That way I can also manage/maintain it remotely via SSH and it should be reliable enough but on the other hand this could be an overkill...

Post your 2 cents please and thank you :)

The next step for improving large language models (if not diffusion) is hot-encoding.

The idea is pretty straightforward:
Generate many prompts, or take many prompts as a training and validation set. Do partial inference, and find the intersection of best overall performance with least computation.

Then save the state of the network during partial inference, and use that for all subsequent inferences. Sort of like LoRa, but for inference, instead of fine-tuning.

Inference, after-all, is what matters. And there has to be some subset of prompt-based initializations of a network, that perform, regardless of the prompt, (generally) as well as a full inference step.

Likewise with diffusion, there likely exists some priors (based on the training data) that speed up reconstruction or lower the network loss, allowing us to substitute a 'snapshot' that has the correct distribution, without necessarily performing a full generation.

Another idea I had was 'semantic centering' instead of regional image labelling. The idea is to find some patch of an object within an image, and ask, for all such patches that belong to an object, what best describes the object? if it were a dog, what patch of the image is "most dog-like" etc. I could see it as being much closer to how the human brain quickly identifies objects by short-cuts. The size of such patches could be adjusted to minimize the cross-entropy of classification relative to the tested size of each patch (pixel-sized patches for example might lead to too high a training loss). Of course it might allow us to do a scattershot 'at a glance' type lookup of potential image contents, even if you get multiple categories for a single pixel, it greatly narrows the total span of categories you need to do subsequent searches for.

In other news I'm starting a new ML blackbook for various ideas. Old one is mostly outdated now, and I think I scanned it (and since buried it somewhere amongst my ten thousand other files like a digital hoarder) and lost it.

I have some other 'low-hanging fruit' type ideas for improving existing and emerging models but I'll save those for another time.

hah, there is a big problem with Facebook, WhatsApp and Instagram..
receiving files not working, no image can be showed, what a mess

I have been spending all day optimizing a wordpess site for pagespeed, looking into how can I optimize the custom scripts which block rendering and I was learning some new things, it was hard but I was making progress. Then comes the senior engineer who installs a plugin and pagespeed went from 60 to 90 on mobile, I was pretty shocked. Then it hit me. IT DELAYS THE LOADING OF EVERY SCRIPT AND IMAGE UNTIL USER INPUT TRICKING THE SCORING SYSTEM. U GET A WHITE SCREEN IF YOU DON'T DO ANYTHING. I told him it's not really faster this way, and he agreed it is not "ethical" but the score is good.
Am I still an idiot naive kid? There is a line between scamming people and quality work, but it keeps getting more blurry.

There was MCQ test based on Java we were required to give by our degree college, partnered with this firm.
The image is not even the tip of the iceberg.
3 of the four options in every question were same.
Select A and later come back to the question, you'll find option C as selected.
Never was I ever this frustrated, not even all the times I've encountered a NPE.
Shitty shitty shitty as fuck.

I adhere to the Socratic method. I don't like people in business who 'explain' things to others by stating "this is obvious" and "this is obvious" about various aspects of very business-specific rules.

No, it's not 'obvious', explain to me ad minutae how something works if you want to transfer your mental image to mine.

Looks like vector drawing applications stopped at bezier curves and don’t want to progress much.

I made a inkscape vector image and I used svg patterns to draw some background, then inkscape stopped responding when I’m trying to open that file on mac.

I tried bunch of other vector drawing apps hoping that at least one know what svg vector patterns are, looks like vector drawing applications use bitmaps for patterns and own formats instead of following svg specification.

I even wanted to pay for illustrator 30$ per month but it can’t do it. It opened my svg file claiming there’s no background there just empty space.

When I open svg image from browser it renders correctly but editing with gui is impossible cause all of those great softwares like illustrator, vectronator, sketch, affinity designer can’t handle vector patterns.

I ended up installing inkscape on old laptop that’s running ubuntu desktop.

Inkscape can do everything I want but I still need to delete not used pattens by editing xml.
At least it handles svg better than others.

Seriously vector image drawing apps suck.

To all developers working on publicly visible APIs or writing public documentation.
DON’T BE A DICK !
Do not just put a screen capture of your curl request which takes 10 minutes to write by hand.
Do not show me list of arguments as an image.
Have AT LEAST one executable demo project (Any language)
And, it’s 2020, add a fucking proxy generator.
How hard can it be?