Root ain't givin' no fucks no mo'

My boss just demanded that I join a conference call. So, I call in, and there's three other people there.

He starts chewing me out for talking with some vendor directly (their VP emailed me directly and asked for a few things, and i was instructed to make him happy). Apparently I used "confusing wording" and "did not talk his language." Bossman was really getting into gear for a ten-minute berating.

It turns out that the guy in question only read half of my first email, and totally ignored the second email where I told him everything was finished and live and working. I told my boss quite bluntly that the guy should have read what I had written, and that he was an idiot. The boss's defense of the guy? "Well, he's a sales guy." I just laughed at him.

Later, bossman started in on me (once again) for not making enough progress on this ridiculous shared-spreadsheet sales tool he wants, saying "We discussed this a week ago!"

I casually reminded him that we had talked about it for the first time ever on Friday night (today is Tuesday), and he had said it wasn't going to be a priority for the next three weeks(!). Again he stopped in his tracks. Again, I laughed at him.

Guy's a tool and I'm so done with caring.

Root's going to be flippant and angry. Root's going to have fun (:

What's he gonna do, fire me? 😂

Manager: Hey, this is Junior. he will work with you from now on.
Me: Oh cool, we could use some help.
(moments later...)
Junior: Hey i got this error. Im new with this engine. sorry.
Me: It cool, then you should read the documentation first. its all there. including your error.
Junior: whats documentation?
Me: ...

For all the cunts ever existed! what do they teach to programmers in college these days?!

When you start reading someone else's code and all you do is properly indent for the first 30 mins so you can actually read it.

Fixing family / friends technical problems, episode 2.

Problem: "I lost my iPhone, I know there's a thing that lets you find it. Can you help?"

Debugging:

Me: sure, it's called "find my iPhone"

Friend: ah yes that's it. How do I use it?

Me: I'll show you, just login here and ... oh you didn't set it up?

Friend: Probably not, I don't know much about this computer stuff.

Me: ... when you setup your phone for the first time, it's a full screen thing that says "do you want us to locate your phone if it's lost. Yes / No". It's hardly writing an encryption algorithm now is it?

Friend: no it's not, but still I just didn't know. I probably clicked no for everything.

Me: ... says here you clicked yes for iCould ... and yes for photo sync ... so you read the one about your pictures but not about lost or stolen property ... nice.

Friend: ... so you can't find it then.

Me: No, natural selection took it away from you.

Friend: oh **** off.

Hi there fellas,

I'm new to devrant and I'll like to share with you my first story.

It was my first payed job. A good friend of mine (media designer in print) called me "My customer needs a website, do you think you can do that?"
At this time I've never build a single page, so my answer was "Of course, easy-peasy".
She told me it was a family business and a nationwide player in finance sector.

I met the CEO, did my research and build a prototype. Well, the CEO and his staff liked it so I finished the website and prepared for the first review.

I booted the laptop and tried to connect to their network. There was none. They just never had a wireless connection not a single cable in the entire office. That was the time I realized that I work for a family business.
The CEO was an ancient guy who probably saw Jesus Christ hanging on the cross in personal and internet is weird thing controlled by the devil himself.

I took the laptop and went over to the CEOs personal office, plugged the network cable out of his Computer and into the laptop. Finally I could show them what I've done.

He took a look at it and called for his assistant. "Might you print that website for us?" That was my second wtf moment.

The assistant returned with a half chopped down and bleached rainforest that contained an image of their new website.

I tried to tell him that a website on paper can't show him the functions n shit, but he looked at me like I was talking two foreign languages at once.

So we reviewed the website on paper and his one and only problem was the size of the letters. "I can't read it well, please make the text bigger" At this moment I wanted to hit my forehead on the table and tell him that it is normal to have readings difficulties when you are walking the shores of Styx.

At the end everything went well, but I realized that dealing with customers is a lot more difficult than developing something for them. The future should prove me right.

That's it.
My first story about my first job.

Thank you for reading 😊

Software engineering is doomed.

The next generation of developers is going to suck as fuck

I've come across a lot of situation that made me think this way.

The most notable examples are right here on devrant.

I've seen a shit ton of rants blaming languages for "bugs" when in fact those "bugs" wouldn't have happened if those fuckers would have read the specifications of said languages.

This new generation doesn't read, when they've got a problem they just fucking go to Google for answers, they don't bother reading specifications, language books, rfc, etc, they don't bother reading where the true source of information are. The documentation ? What's that ? Let's go to stackoverflow first, let's think second.

Same back in school I've seen people in the highest grades that couldn't fucking decompress a tar archive.

In the coming decades we will loose the high skilled people, the people that made the software world as it is today we will be left with fuckers only able to blame things for stuff they don't understand.

This is my first true rant. This is me being pissed off.

Dude, FUCK automated bathrooms.

First of all, what the hell is so complicated about making a motion sensing faucet that works? Why does it *need* to be motion sensing? I stand there for 5-10 seconds with my stupid soapy hands extended, waiting for a squirt of the divine liquid.

And then the immediately following experience isn't much better. Motion sensing paper towel dispenser. The first go works fine, but it always dispenses half of what you need to get your grimy paws dry. So you go in for seconds, and it just flat out ignores you. Leaves you on read. You flap your pathetic noodle arms at it again. It isn't happening. Please wait 3-5 business days.

Oh, and god forbid you forget to cover the automatic toilet with a few wasted squares. Lean into a shit ONCE and you've just been prematurely flushed. Your ass is misted with the cold, unforgiving equivalent of an automatic insult.

Asshole design

Waaaay too many but let's go with this one for now.

At my previous job there was a web application which was generating about 1gb of log data a second. Server was full and the 'fullstack engineers' we called had zero clue about backend stuff and couldn't fix it.

Me and another engineer worked our asses off to figure this out but eventually the logging stopped and it went back to normal.

Great, right?

For that moment. I was the on-call server engineer and at like 3am I got called awake because this shit was happening again.
Sleep drunk with my phone I ssh'd into the server, not sure about what to do at first but then suddenly: let's chattr the goddamn log file...

$ chattr +i /var/log/logfile

Bam, worked, done, back to sleep.

(this comment + param marks the file in a way that it can only be read until the mark is removed, so you can't write to it or move it or remove it or whatever)

Just downloaded some big ass codebase and the first line i read is:

"// The source code is not well documented, but every advanced programmer will be able to understand it after some time."

Well... let's find out about your definition of "some time", Dickhead!

I've had 3 interviews with the same company. The first two interviews went pretty well, they looked interested, on the third they tell me "your CV says you are not graduated yet, we can't hire you now".

SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU HAD TO WASTE MY TIME?

You've had my CV before the first interview, why the hell didn't you read that I am still a student? Is the first thing it's written on it! Stupid fuckers.

When you write a guide and people completely ignore it, then bug you about problems they wouldn't have had if they read the damn guide in the first place.

It's funny how every one says Google respects your privacy.

I remember a few months ago, one of my manuscripts was removed by Google because it "violated the terms and services."

First of all, it's just a psychological crime thriller about murder. I read the terms and services and it said nothing about murder, so I didn't violate anything.

Second of all, assuming they removed it for the reason it was all bloody and about murder, how would they know that? Did they start snooping and read my manuscript?

Fortunately, it was recovered the next day, but if Google cares so much about your privacy, why would they read my document?

At an interview, the first round was an online coding round. Two questions, one easy one hard, 90 minutes, easy peasy.

I solved the hard one first.
A bit of good logic, followed MVC pattern, all done. Worked flawlessly.
Submitted code. Online compiler threw up an internal error citing java is an invalid command(jdk not found).
Called the invigilators. What I heard next, I couldn't believe this shit.
"We're not responsible for any errors you may be having. Figure it out yourself"
I was like WTF dude. This is not even a compilation or runtime error!
After a heated discussion, I made him look at the code.
Him - what is all this classes and all? Why haven't you written everything inside the main function?
Me - those are model classes. Those are different helper functions. That is a recursive function to avoid 5 for loops and use divide and conquer. Ever heard of OOP? what kind of person writes a 300 line program inside one function?
Him - no no we write it like that only. Correct this.
Me - I fit everything inside the main function. Still the same error, java not installed. Called the idiot to have a look at it.
Him - yeah your code is wrong.
Me - may I know what's wrong with it? Can you fix it please?
Him - no no we aren't allowed to see the code (he had already read it twice. It was compiling and running perfectly, locally) .
Yeah you solved only 1 problem, you were supposed to solve 2.
Me - yes because the rest of the time I had the pleasure of your company. (It isn't everyday that I see talking buffoons.)

If I run into a problem with code or a configuration of some kind, like a good little programmer, I Google it.

One of two things will happen:

1) I quickly find the answer to my problem.

or

2) After hours of searching, I can't find anything about my problem. At all. I change the search phrasing, adjust the advanced search settings, read all the somewhat related but still unrelated articles. Nothing.

If #1 happens, awesome, life is great, thanks Internet!

If #2 happens, it's because of one of two things:

1) I am the first person in the world to stumble upon this issue. Quick! To the Blog Cave!

2) I AM TOO STUPID TO BE DOING WHAT I AM TRYING TO DO BECAUSE MY MISTAKE IS SO UNBELIEVABLY DUMB THAT NO ONE HAS BOTHERED NOR WILL BOTHER TO WRITE ABOUT IT, ANYWHERE, EVER. I LOOK AT MY WORK AGAIN FOR THE 100TH TIME AND FINALLY REALIZE MY EMBARRASSING NOOBERY.

2.1 is a unicorn. 2.1's happen to other people.

I am dealing with a 2.2.

Yesterday I got contracted by a recruiter through LinkedIn.

Lo and behold, SHE ACTUALLY READ MY INFO.

In the message there were references to my previous experience, my tech stack and others stuff.

That's a first for me, but it feels good to know that this kind of recruiters exist.

Hashedram's compilations #1
List of most annoying website designs.

1) Pages with AUTO PLAYING VIDEOS.

Yes I'm looking at you Netflix. Along with every news website known to man. I'm looking to read a fucking article, so why would you even waste your money and bandwidth trying to shove a video of some shit I don't care about in my face, and make it follow me as I scroll down like a fucking insecure puppy. Also, fuck you Instagram.

2) Pages that redirect once immediately after you visit them, thereby fucking with the browser history and the BACK BUTTON just leads back to the same fucking site.

I mean, just why. Did you think I would just go "Hey the back button doesn't work so let's stay on the site and read their awesome content"?

3) Sites showing things in a SLIDESHOW, when it actually should be in a list.

Slideshows are for progressive stories or for showing lists where you don't care about what's in them. Top 10 foods that reduce weight. Slideshow 1/15. Fuck you.

4) LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE USING AN AD BLOCKER

Yes. Yes I am. No I will not turn it off for you, you narcissistic snowflake fuck. And don't even try to guilt shame me into turning it off, because I know you're just going to bombard me with videos of sexy singles in the area if I do.

5) Pages where I see the first 3 lines of an article and have to SUBSCRIBE to see more.

Yes. Brilliant fucking idea. A user wants to see what your site has to offer, so within the first three seconds, don't show him exactly that.

6) Looking up an article and having to read through the entire motivational life story of the author.

I just want to know how to boil eggs, not read about your journey across Africa learning how to make difference recepies using boiled rhino dung.

7) CLICK BAIT.

Title: School boy designs blockchain machine learning game engine

Actual Content: Tic tac toe program made using linked lists

Just wow. I am amazed by what just happened.

A year ago my parents decided to switch from desktop to laptop for convenience. Knowing their needs, i bought them one without an OS and installed Ubuntu 16.04 on it. The thing is that if you do a regular maintenance of the laptop once a year at their partner company, you get additional 4 years of warranty (this offer is amazing).

So today was the day I brought the laptop for this maintenance for the first time. They make you a profile on their support website where you can track shit regarding your device, super convenient. First thing I notice that the login page was not https. Awkward, but there is no sensitive data here so i let it pass. Naturally i forgot my password, so I requested a new one and guess what? I recieved it in plaintext via mail. A tech repair oriented company does this, my god.

I went there, gave them the laptop in question and got a piece of paper, where they wrote that the laptop is in their hands now, and the current physical state of the laptop, and blabla.

I got home and I read what the guy wrote among other things: THE OPERATING SYSTEM IS NOT LEGAL.

How the fuck is Ubuntu not legal??? What the fuck is this shit? I sure as hell didn't torrent it or bought a booteged copy on the streets.

Hey DevRant community :-) I’m Milo, I’m quite new to this app and to be completely honest I’m already addicted to it! And honestly just having a community which is full of developers or people with common interests like myself just makes me feel warm and happy! .

A bit about myself I’m from Australia and gained an interest in Coding about 2 years ago where i landed a course in TAFE. Now i had absolutely no prior experience i was a complete rookie, first day was basically (if I remember) only one day of using the console with what I remember to be sequential programming. Well after that it was all GUI and a disaster i had no clue whatsoever of what i was doing and well interestingly enough i still managed to enjoy it and move on😅.

Fast forward about six months I’m now doing a proper degree and actually understanding concepts and better at coding and i love it!. Welp guys & gals i thank you for taking the time to read my post I certainly hope i posted this in the right section! :-)

Hope you all have a great night or day where ever you may be!.

An application based on a single MySQL stored procedure that contained all the application business logic inside of it (plus a poor webapp that simply called it). The stored procedure had 97 (yes, NINETY SEVEN) parameters... and about half of them were boolean flag used for enabling/disabling another parameter. I think that Uncle Bob could follow you holding an AK-47 if he saw that. The saddest part is that the shit was written by a guy having a PhD in computer science, and he knew that was bad, but the boss asked him to do it in that way. The guy left the company before I joined it and I had to maintain that crap. Guys, the first time I saw it I thought that should be a joke. Code generated by decompilers was easier to read, maybe even Brainfuck. I tried complaining with the boss but she said that the system was wonderful and very efficient. This was one of the reasons I moved to another company after some months.

Manager: this is your first day in your first job right?

Me: yes mam!

Mngr: Good .. here take this system understand it and read all of the source codes.

Me: hmmm Umm ok ... where's the documentation?

Mngr: no documentations ... the contractor left without providing the documents for it so we need you to understand everything ... as we have alot of enhancements lined up for it ... and we're too cheap to hire someone with advanced knowledge on this ... goodluck!

Me: ......

When I first saw the line:
include <stdio.h>

I read it as:
include <studio.h>

Got a call from Google!

Asked for two months to study: Discrete mathematics, Calculus, introductions to algorithms, design patterns, CTCI and linux/unix OS workings in general.

I know I'll be banging my head against the wall and I don't have my expectations too high. But regardless I feel like this is a good excuse to speed up my studies and push myself in the direction I want to go already. It'll be a win-win even if I don't land the position because I'll definitely gain a ton in the process of preparing.

I will be expose to all of this material (except for calculus because I've been learning it for a couple of months) for the first time so I know it'll be a challenge and I am looking forward to it.

If any of you have any tips on good study habits that'll be much appreciated; I currently like to read most of my material and supplement with videos/tutorials... Khan is great but they lack material on discrete mathematics unfortuantely. Thanks in advance!

Wish me luck (:

Ooh this is good.

At my first job, i was hired as a c++ developer. The task seemed easy enough, it was a research and the previous developer died, leaving behind a lot of documentation and some legacy fortran code. Now you might not know, but fortran can be really easily converted to c, and then refactored to c++.

Fine, time to read the docs. The research was on pollen levels, cant really tell more. Mostly advanced maths. I dug through 500+ pages of algebra just to realize, theres no way this would ever work. Okay dont panic, im a data analyst, i can handle this.

Lets take a look at the fortran code, maybe that makes more sense. Turns out it had nothing to do with the task. It looped through some external data i couldnt find anywhere and thats it. Yay.

So i exported everything we had to a csv file, wrote a java program to apply linefit with linear regression and filter out the bad records. After that i spent 2 days in a hot server room, hoping that the old intel xeon wouldnt break down from sending java outputs directly to haskell, but it held on its own.

Dear customer,
as our services are completely free and we do not get paid for working, we beg you to understand, that there are some things you have to tolerate.

1. We are DEFINITELY not going to work 24/7 for you and answer immediately anytime. Only because it's 3pm in your country doesn't mean it's 3pm in our country!

2. We will NOT waste any time figuring out your gibberish and translate your language to our language or whatever, you have to be able to understand English anyways because our website and rules and everything is English!

3. Speaking of rules, READ THEM, I'm sick of explaining to you why you are banned, what do you think FAQs are made for?!

4. STOP SPAMMING AND TAGGING ME FFS. First we have a support chat so you can leave a message there and somebody will read it eventually AND SECONDLY I'M NOT THE ONLY SUPPORTER SO STOP BUGGING ME.

5. READ THE FUCKING MESSAGES I WRITE!

geez.. I just lost it for a second... okay.. gotta go now, I got 20 new messages since I started writing this rant.

First they came for the atheists, and I didn't speak out - because I'm not an atheist

Then they came for the university teachers, and I didn't speak out - because I don't like universities

Then they came for the gamers, and I didn't speak out - because I don't play videogames

Then they came for Open Source and I didn't speak out - because "anyone can fork it"

Then they came for me - and there was no one left to speak out for me

I know I butchered the poem and I'm not comparing our social situation to the Holocaust (obviously), but I think it kind of illustrates that silence and gradually giving up ideals like justice and meritocracy can end up badly.

I also encourage you to read the actual poem it's pretty nice and food for thought.

Worst code review experience?

Hard to pick just one, but most were in a big meeting room with 4+ other developers not related to the project and with some playing Monday-Morning-Quarterback instead of offering productive feedback.

In one code review, the department mgr reviewed the code from a third party component library.

<brings up the code on the big screen>
Mgr: "I can't read any of this, its a mix of English and something else."
Me: "Its German."
Mgr: "Then why is 'Button' in English? This code is a mess."
Me: "I'm not exactly sure how I should respond, I mean, I didn't write any of this code."
Mgr: "Yes, but you are using it, so it's fair game for a code review."
Me: "Its not really open source, but we can make requests if you found something that needs to be addressed."
Mgr: "Oh yes, all this...whatever this is..<pointing again to the German>"
Me: "I don't think they will change their code to English just so you can read it."
Mgr: "We paid good money, you bet your ass they'll change it!"
Me: "I think the components were like $30 for the unlimited license. They'll tell us to go to hell first. Is there something about my code you want to talk about?"
Mgr: "<Ugggh>...I guess not, I couldn't get past all that German. Why didn't we go with an American company? Hell, why didn't we just write these components ourselves!?"
Me: "Because you gave a directive that if we found components that saved us time, to put in a request, and you approved the request. The company is American, they probably outsourced or hired German developers. I don't know and not sure why we care."
Mgr: "Security! What if they are sending keystrokes back to their servers!"
Me: "Did you see any http or any network access?"
Mgr: "How could I? The code is in German!"
Monday-Morning-Quarterback1: "If it were me, I would have written the components myself and moved on"
Me: "No, I don't think you could for less than $30"
Monday-Morning-Quarterback2: "Meh...we get paid anyway. Just add the time to the estimate."
Mgr: "Exactly! Why do we even have developers who can't read this mess."
Me: "Oh good Lord! Did anyone review or even look at my code for this review!?"
<silence>
Mgr: "Oh...ok...I guess we're done here. Thanks everyone."
<everyone starts to leave>
Me: "Whoa!...wait a sec..am I supposed to do something?"
Mgr: "Get that company to write their code in English so we can read it. You have their number, call em'...no...wait...give me their number. You keep working, I'll take care of this personally"

In they nicest way possible, the company did tell him to go to hell.

!rant

There are some extremely competent, blind developers where I work. They have a tool that read screen elements out loud to them.

At first it was chocking to see they work with the screen off. It makes total sense though, however this thought never crossed my mind before. Their headphones serve as screen to them, which is pretty cool.

It's my first week working at shithole.co (can i say that?). My boss is a micromanaging asshole who knows the bare minimum re: programming. He thinks css is hard (no offense). I'm fresh outta college. He expects me to be able to do a very complicated api development through an equally complicated authorization process. Every fucking day "Is it working yet?" [This is my first week on the job]. I don't think he's read the documentation and I don't think he understands how to. As I am typing this out I realize I'm more educated than this dumb ass. Oh, some more context. Our senior dev is working on a more important project So we don't have time to bother him? So I am doing his job for 1/10 the cost. Oh, and i'm not allowed to contact him because he is too important. When the app inevitably crashes and no one knows how to fix it. I will give them my nutsack to swallow (can i say that?).

How do I don’t over complicate things?

Background: I’m currently working for a game with some base project. It alr has pretty complicated ai and some other system.

Today, I was asked by boss to help him set up a test environment for testing taking damage of a character.

First I tried to read up how the battle system and ai works in the base project. Figured, it’s overkill for this testing purpose.

Then, tried to use some plugin to automate the ai and movement. Make the enemy follow the target and stuff.

Alr spending half day, then suddenly realised all I need is just to make one script that takes damage on collision.

Why am I still a programmer? 😭

I work for healthcare client project in a start up, worked two years straight without a break.

Client is very inconsiderate about developers work-life balance, he always wants to release every features yesterday.

Never had a reasonable deadline, worked late nights most of the time. No one had backbone to control this client from our side.

Its only developers team, no project management, scrum masters or anything, everything has to be taken care by Dev's.

I decided to take a week break from work.

The first day of my leave he pinged me 3 times to change an "from email" address for notification email which no one give a damn about.

I never replied or did anything. But the part of myself is dying of guilt.

Now I can't relax myself completely.

Re-thinking of my life choices atm.

I loved programming since high school, I can work on computers 24/7 without tired. That's how much I love it. Now I'm just tired of it.

If anyone who read this till here. Thank you.

Have you guys heard about blind coding?

I had been to competition, first round was quiz.
That was quite easy, though most of the questions were incomplete and didn't make any sense.

They have provided an app. We use that to check the result.

So first round is over, 1 hour later my friend called me asked whether I'm qualified for the next round . I checked the results and my name wasn't there. I was very disappointed.

I left that place after I saw my result. I got a bus which goes to my place.

After 10 minutes, I got a call from the event head asking why I didn't attend second round 😑. I asked why name wasn't there on the result, for which he replied with "database updatation error".

I got down in the next stop and took a bus again to that place.

I reached there, second round was started, First part was debugging. It was easy, I debugged the given program and got the desired output.
Second part was coding. A guy showed a problem to solve and told me to read it quickly . I did as he told.
He opened Dev C++ and gave me a paper to write the program .

When I was about to start typing, he turned off the monitor and told I should write it on paper first and type the program having monitor turned off. 😨

I wrote and typed the program without seeing.
After 30 minutes a college lecturer came to give marks. He told me to compile the program.

TBH, there were many typing mistakes. As header file spelling was wrong it showed only one error.

Him: Huh, cool only one error, well done. *noted that and walked to a guy next to me*

Fuck Apple and its review system

So, this started in december. We wanted to publsih an app, after years of development.

Submit to review, and passes on the first try. Well, what do you know. We are on manual release option, so we can release together with the android counterpart. Well yes, but someone notices that the app name is not what was aggreed (App Name instead of AppName). Okay, should be easy, submit the same app, just the name changed. If it passed once, it will pass again, right? HAH

Rejected, because the description, why we use the device’s camera is too general. Well... its the purpose of the app... but whatever, i read the guidelines, okay, its actually documented with exapmles. BUT THEN WHY THE FUCK COULDNT YOU SAY THAT ON THE FIRST UPLOAD?

Whatever, fix it, new version, accepted, ready to release just in time.

It doesindeed roll out,but of course, we notice that the app has a giant issue, but only on specific phones. None of our test phones had this problem, but those who have, essentially cannot use our program. Nasty as it is, the fix is really easy, done in 5 minutes. Upload it asap, literally nothing changed from user point of view, except now it doesnt crash on said devices. Meanwhile 1 star reviews are arriving from these users - of course with all the right. Apple should allow this patch quickly, right? HAH

THE REAL BULLSHIT COMES NOW

With only config files changed, the same binary uploaded we get rejected? What now? Lets read it. “Metadata rejected, no need to upload new binary”.... oh fine only the store page is wrong? Easy. Read the message, what went wrong. “Referencing third party content is nit permitted on the app store” meaning that no android test device should be shown. Fine, your rules. They even send a picutre of the offending element. BUT ITS NOT EVEN ON THE STORE. THATS A SCREENSHOT OF THE APP. HOW IS THAT METADATA? I ask about this, and i get a reply, from either a bot, or a person who cant speak or read english, and only pasted a sample answer, repeating the previous message. WTF. Fine, i guess you are dumb, but since they stop replying to our queries, do the only sensible thing, re-record the offending tutorial video that actually contained an android device. This is about 2 weeks, after the first try to apply a simple patch to a broken app. And still, how did it pass the review 2 times?

Whatever, reupload again, play the waiting game for a week, when the promised average wait time is 2 days, they hit us with a message, that they want to know what patent we use in our apps core functionality. WTF WHY NOW? It didnt bother you for a month, let it release ti production and now you delay a simple patch for this? We send them what they know. Aaaaand they reply: sorry we need more time to review your app. FUUUUUUCKKK YOUUU. You are reviewing a PATCH with close to zero functional change!!! Then, this shit goes on, every week we ask about an ETA, always asking for patience... at the end it took another 3 weeks... so december 15 to jan 21 in total...

FOR. A. SINGLE. FUCKING. PATCH

Bottom line is what is infurating, apple cares that there is an android device in the tutorial video, but they dont care that a significant percentage of our users simply cannot use the app.

Im done

After 9 months of my course that involved much fear, anxiety and depression, last night I had a great moment.
Learning about scrapers for my dissertation - watched 10 minutes of a tutorial video then thought of an idea and went away and an hour later had built a little program to read a restaurants menu on their website then read back what they had in the form of a poem - all in a language I hadn't used before that night.
The reason I learnt coding was that I idolised the idea of thinking of a problem and then just solving it with your own code. Last night was the first time I felt like I might be getting there.
:).
p.s. Sorry this isn't very ranty.

Once had a manager who would refuse to review anything on the basis he "didn't have enough time". Not just code reviews, but also customer comms, support messages, documentation etc. - anything that it's good to get more than 1 set of eyes on. This was a small startup so me working pretty much solo - it wasn't like there was anyone else able to review anything like this.

Fair enough, you might say. He trusts me. Just put it out there.

...but then *as soon as* it was published / sent / committed / whatever, he'd then magically find 5 minutes to glance through it and point out how rubbish / unhelpful / ridiculous the work was, and how it should have never gone out in the first place, and why didn't I read through it before sending as I'd clearly realise how stupid this was.

After a few rounds of this I actually flipped out on him in the office, called him out on his BS and told him to think for 2 seconds about how ridiculous this situation was. In fairness to the guy he did back down, take note and it didn't happen again, but damn, those times were some of the most frustrating of my career to date.

Vuejs is great. I havent read any of the docs, only the first part of how to make components, and pretty sure i just hackes shit together but i now have a working site. It just speeds everything up, unlike fucking angular lol.

I started programming 7 years ago, but I downloaded my first tutorials on programming in C++ already back in 2000. I had read maybe 4 pieces of literature, didn't understand anything, because it taught things in this order 1, "So, say you want to create a cat?", no I don't. I want to make a useful program.
2, "then you have make a constructor and a destructor", makes sense since that perfectly replicates nature, not,
3, "then you can define a method in the class that enables your cat to meow", eeeh no it doesn't make a sound, what it does however is print a series of characters even less useful than "Hello World" to stdout.

Then I found assembler and it all made sense! 😀

After i read about Arch Linux for the first time here about a few weeks ago, i thought i'd give Antergos a try on my Laptop which i use solely for working. Found out that Matlab is supported, so i don't even need a VM.

First time having a Linux distro. Still feels a bit odd for being a Win only user for a long time, but i love the look and with every hour it gets easier. :)

Whenever something goes mainstream and becomes buzzword there are annoying consequences of it.

First, it’s harder to find anything meaningful about the topic.
Second, suddenly everyone is an expert and web search starts to show not related products like promo codes, stupid videos, tutorials for dumb.
Third, old content that was interesting is lost under pile of shit or gets deleted.

I feel like I’m living in middle ages and before I try to watch something interesting it’s deleted by Spanish inquisition and replaced by some crap.

Most of expert content I have in favorites is returning 404 and youtube videos are deleted or private so from some time I started to backup all content I read or watch and find interesting in public networks.

Fortunately I have couple of terabytes of storage to backup interesting topics but I’m not happy that I’m back to times when I was saving internet page to floppy disk to show it to my friend later.

What a fucking nightmare.

Patience needed here ...

Long time ago, back in a day of Microsoft Office 95 and 97, I was contracted to integrate a simple API for a payment service provider.

They've sent me the spec, I read it, it was simple enough: 1. payment OK, 2. payment FAILED. Few hours later the test environment was up and happy crediting and debiting fake accounts. Then came the push to prod.

I worked with two other guys, we shut down the servers, made a backup, connected new provider. All looked perfectly fine. First customers were paying, first shops were sending their products... Until two days later it turned out the money isn't coming through even though all we are getting from the API is "1" after "1"! I shut it off. We had 7 conference calls, 2 meetings, 3 days of trying and failing. Finally, by a mere luck, I found out what's what.

You see, Microsoft, when you invent your own file format, it's really nice to make it consistent between versions... So that the punctuation made in Microsoft Word 97 that was supposed to start from "0" didn't start from "1" when you open the file in Microsoft Word 95.

Also, if you're a moron who edits documentation in Microsoft Word, at least export it to a fucking PDF before sending out. Please.

I just received this gem this morning.
First of let me start by saying that I am against scammers and all this Nigerian prince crap.
But some of this shit is so bad that it actually pisses me off. My intelligence feels insulted.

Look at this email. These fuckers spent hours perfecting the Hotmail feel to it. The logo, design and even font are in par. As I started reading the shit, the spelling mistakes are so obvious that I wondered; do these nut suckers know that whatever email editor they use, it autocorrects for you? Are they just ignoring the recommendations? I mean they could've even used the "Did you mean" feature in Google. Or any of the freely available grammatical check sites out there.

Think of this as plagiarism. It's bad but a majority of us can appreciate a well planned out one.

I'm yet to encounter a really good scam email that almost had me click their link. There's always an obvious stand out! Is there like a copyright holder to a perfectly well put scam email?!

(And yes, you just read a rant about someone complaining that scammers aren't doing a great job)

Last week I was erasing a 2Gb USB thumb while copying some really important shit to my backup disk. I look at the terminal and see it's taking a lot of time to did zeroes on dev/sdb.
Then I realized that dev/sdb is the backups drive and I just erased the firsts sectors of my only fucking backup.
It's ok, I said, let's see what can TestDisk do for me. And it only could find an empty sad partition that had useless shit on it. Whdd couldn't even find the drive. Cat and dd vomited 160Gb of nothing to a file that couldn't be read. I was lost, because I failed doing something I'm really good at. And I did it because I was to stupid to check fstab...
It's the very first time I couldn't recover data, so I'm thinking about delete "Data recovery" from my resume skills and put "Data cleaning. Really effective. I can send you 160Gb of pure horse shit to prove it" instead.

Big rant.
Just finished my first year of uni. I took an extra course on c# (mvc, entity framework) and android development in java. We learned a lot of stuff and at the end of the semester they held a contest. We had to develop an app respecting their specifications and add something from ourselves for extra points. Problem was that we were supposed to work on the project during our finals, which we didn't, finishing uni is on the first place. But we had a week after finals to work on it. I, like many others, slept very littlre during that week, only to work on that app, I worked for more than 13 hours a day to finish it (it was a pretty big app) and I was pretty happy with the end result. Today they were supposed to announce the apps that made it to the final. They just announced that no app deserves to be in the final. They know that we had finals, but that we could still do better. They just peed on our work, probably threw our code away, fucking +13 hours a day, 5-6 hours of sleep everyday, almost no fun for a whole week after finals, and they think no one deserves to win. Fuck them, fuck their shit contest. Fuck you essensys, I hope your devs read this, fuck you bell ends.

What is your story of your first encounter with a Linux Distro?

Here's mine (Slight long version) –
Back in my 8th grade I used to buy Tech magazines that used to have DVDs filled with random updated contents like Audio/Video tools, Wallpapers and other stuff. There used to be this "Linux Distro of the Month" section that I used to ignore because I didn't know what it is.
But one issue of the magazine had a review of this "amazing new" Ubuntu 10.10. I read it and at first I thought it's some kind of theme for Windows (I know). But then I tried it out on my HP Compaq nx6120 which had a pure BIOS. No UEFI shit. Ubuntu came with it's wubi installer and it installed Ubuntu smoothly like a normal software. Later I discovered that it is a completely different operating system that doesn't run anything from my Windows. I was upset about it and I booted back to Windows.
But I never removed it. I felt like exploring what it was and why people use it.
It's almost 9 years later and I'm so glad with what had happened back then.

Im getting a bit tired of programming.

I have been struggling for years regarding programming. I did have some moments of perceived success, but most of the time it has been depressing.

I’m not sure if I dislike programming. But there are some aspects of it that make me feel not as passionate about it.

First of, programs are invisible. No one sees your program or you (assuming we’re talking about a non artistic dev job).

People can’t see lines of code executing, but even if they did it would be gibberish to them.

Users can only become aware of bad software and that kind of breaks my heart a bit.

You could write fast, stable, secure, easy to read, easy to update software. People won’t notice. Hell, even your boss/coworkers might not notice.

In fact, sometimes you try to do the good thing, you try to become a better dev, you try to write tests first, you try to i18n, and what do you get? “Uhh, that’s taking too much time and I don’t see the benefit”.

I know some people will say that people noticing bad service happens on every job.

But programming is the ultimate isolation job. No client has ever told me “hey that code you wrote was pretty good”. They can’t even read code.

I don’t know the users, the users don’t know me, and the users can only judge my program by the result, they can only judge the visual interface.

Let’s say you write a cool project at github. The code is great. Guess what, every language’s ecosystem out there is saturated. Everything is already written. GitHub is saturated. Your best project ends up being a just for yourself enjoyment.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t enjoy code for yourself. That’s how I bet most prolific coders start. I’ve been doing that for many years now. But at some point you want to be part of something with humans.

Imagine I’m stranded on an island with nothing no humans, just food, water and a computer. Would I write code just for myself, just for fun? I think I would off myself 3 months in.

Maybe I should do develop a more social talent...

I had a manager who scolded me in me in public on a non-IT floor because I used child classes and overloading of methods which "is too hard to read". Instead use "lots of ifs and else's". This is the guy that had a JSP so large (be cause he had so many ifs) that it couldn't be compiled even on a server.

The best karma happened a few months later. I was looking for a new job (wonder why?) and was very deep in the interview process - like round 5- of company A. I got talking to this jackass, who had no idea I was interviewing, said "yeah I applied to company A once. Couldn't get past the first round. Great benefits, though.". Me getting the job a week later was the best thing ever.

University Final Viva for OOP with C++
(Yeah, that first line is a rant in itself for the likes of me and Mr. Torvalds)
Assistant Professor:
Tell me a few "functions" in C++ STL algorithm header
Me:
*starts off with the first one that came to my mind*
sort()
AP: Huh? a I'm asking the Algorithms in C++ STL
Me: Yes, this is one of them Ma'am.
She looked at me as if I told her that I'm dating her daughter. It became clear she doesn't know about it and she'll gladly deduct my marks for getting it wrong. So I explained how Sort() is a hybrid of quicksort, heap sort and insertion sort. (Read about it an hour ago while doing a competitive programming question)
AP: Tell me the ones we did in class.
I haven't attended those classes, so I just told her the ones I knew.

After a couple more infuriating questions, which themselves sounded right from a book published in the 90's, she gave me 10/15.

This is what's wrong with India's Education system, even the teachers know only the stuff mentioned in the course hand-outs. Forget brownie points, you get screwed over by the teachers for actually knowing stuff and using it.

Hi every developer! My name is Allen. English is not my native language so forgive me if I say something that does not make any sense. Let me tell you my story how I become a programmer. (I am still learning) My first computer was a DELL OptiPlex GX 720 desktop. My father bought it for our self-employee job. Before he allow me to use the computer, I used to sit next to him and watching what he do, what he click and what he gets. When he allow me to use the computer, I was slow at typing. One or 2 WPM (word per minute) my father taught me how to use the computer. Very slowly, my typing speed improves. I understand how to use the computer. but one day, I do what make me regret. I was playing with some executables, when I double clicking it, it does not work I used to associate files with apps. I associate music files with every player I want. So, I did what I used to, I associate exe files with windows media center! The computer started to open hundreds of windows media center (WMC for short) whenever an app is clicked, it opens windows media center. Today, I realized that windows were trying to open every app and every process that regularly run. However, since I associate it with WMC, instead of the app itself, it opens WMC some days after the mistake, I wonder how apps work and how I can create my own. My father  told me before that a program is simply a binary file that the computer can read. However, it was too advanced to me at the time.I begin my search with google. Everytime I search, it says "learn to code" or something like that. I see some C++ code but, it was disgusting. when I read just a few lines of a hello world code in java. it was too complex

What I seen

#$$#% $%&$%&*#!@

~

(&*%&$ (_(*^% #&&* (^^$(&^$%^( %^*$())

~

^$70^(`*#%`*#&%^)*!"   Hello world   "#@

~

~

The actual code:

class helloworld

{

    public static void main(String args[])

    {

         System.out.println("Hello World!");

     }

}

I look for an easy way but my attempts fail. then. I push

I to learn how to code.I try learning java. but it still

Very complex. i tried LibertyBASIC. from LibertyBASIC to

Java. after learning LibertyBASIC, it was easy!

LibertyBASIC -> Java -> Ruby -> NOW, C# and XAML

Today, I am learning C# and XAML.

My first OS                         :  Windows 7

My first Computer             :  DELL OptiPlex GX 720

My first successful click  :  The Start menu

My first used App              : Microsoft Encarta 2009

My first created App         : Hi-Lo(number-guessing game. written in LibertyBASIC)

Thankyou for reading this Long story.

 

My coach during my first internship. The first 4 weeks he took the time to pair program at least 3 hours a day with me. He needed the time for his own work but still invested in me. His technical prowess was insane. His code was so easy to read that it took me less than 3 weeks to get to know the 500,000+ lines codebase. He could explain the most complex stuff at such a fundamental level. After those 4 weeks of coaching I wasn't an intern anymore. I was an actual member of the team. Also learned a lot of useful non-technical skills like planning and communication from him.
Then after those 4 weeks he resigned and started working for another company. At the time I found it a dick move. It took me months to realize he managed to get an intern with 0 experience so comfortable around a code base that everybody treated me as a worthy colleague and engineer. It was a matter of days before people would ask me hard questions and I found I could answer each and everyone of them.

Pure sensei this guy was. Such a different level of knowledge and ability. I hope to become such a model for all of my students.

Red flags in your first week of your software engineering job 🚩

You do the first few days not speaking to anyone.
You can't get into the building and no one turns up until mid day.
The receptionist thinks you're too well dressed to work in this building, thinks you're a spy and calls security on you.
You are eating alone during lunch time in the cafeteria
You have bring your own material for making coffee for yourself

When you try to read the onboarding docs and there aren't any.
You have to write the onboarding docs.

You don't have team mates.
When you ask another team how things are going and they just laugh and cry.😂😭

There's no computer for you, and not even an "it's delayed" excuse. They weren't expecting you.
Your are given a TI PC, because "that's all we have", even though there's no software for it, and it's not quite IBM compatible.
You don't have local admin rights on your computer.💀
You have to buy a laptop yourself to be able to do your job.

It's the end of the week and you still don't have your environment set up and running.
You look at the codebase and there are no automated tests.
You have to request access every time you need to install something through a company tool that looks like it was made in 2001.

Various tasks can only be performed by one single person and they are either out sick or on vacation.
You have to keep track of your time in 6 minute increments, assigned to projects you don't know, by project numbers everyone has memorised (and therefore aren't written down).
You have to fill in timesheets and it takes you 30 minutes each day to fill them in because the system is so clunky.🤮

Your first email is a phishing test from the IT department in another country and timezone, but it has useful information in it, like how to login to the VPN.
Your second email is not a phishing test, but has similar information as the first one. (You ignore it.)
Your name is spelled wrong in every system, in a different way. 2 departments decide that it's too much trouble, and they never fix the spelling as long as you work there. One of them fixes it after you leave, and annoys you for a month because you haven't filled out the customer survey.

This is my first rant with image, I was taking break and decided​ to read Android apps comments/reviews. So I picked this app call "Calculator", developed by Google.

Take a look at the second comments from the screenshot. It is beyond User Error...

PM: "so I need you to deploy this new application to some new server. The deadline is in 2 days"

Me: "yeah I can do that, is the application ready and has been tested? Have the servers been set up properly by the IT guy?"

PM: "yep, all is set up and good"

Couple of hours later I try locating the server, only to find it didn't exist.

Me: "the server you mentioned earlier, is doesn't appear to exist?"

PM: "it definitely does, IT guy said he set it all up"

I dig around a little more, but this server definitely doesn't exist. The IT guy was on holiday for a week, so we had to wait for him to get back; delaying the release. On the morning the IT guy got back,

PM: " I though you said you set up that server for the application, we've had to delay it now!"

IT: "I just set it up this morning. Like I said in the email to you before I Ieft, I will have to do it first thing when I get back after holiday"

Turns out the PM had asked the IT guy to spin up the server, but never bothered to read his response. Assuming it was done he told the client he'd have it deployed in a couple of days.

The application was deployed successfully later that day, but not before the PM blamed us two for its delay.

I'm so fucking tired of OOP.
This bullshit never ends. Everyone treats OOP in their own, proper (of course) way. You read tons of those fashion books, like uncle bob and shit. and then comes a dumb asshole that starts reviewing your code, and tells you doing it wrong. FUCK. and you can't tell anything to your TL or PM cuz they are same dumb asholes. Because after you fix all the bullshit from the first asshole, those more responsible assholes come and tell you that you still doing it wrong.

- uh.. bruh, why don't you make interface for everything? that' S.O.L.I.D, you know.. it just right thing.
- bruh, why don't you use enum and switch case. we need a factory.
- bruh, we don't use abstract classes, use interface
- could you rewrite your linq/stream thing into a class and a method. it's just simpler for us. foreach loop is something everyone knows.

well,then go and LEARN the tool you're dealing with, coderfucker.

FUUUUCK.

As you start managing people, you understand why you read job listings requiring attributes like "Passionate about creating things" or anything like that.

When you see people not proactive and just lazy in a group, and you let them in, it's really disappointing. It makes you feel like you have to put everyone out, do it all again with new people, and pay attention to what gave them away the first time but you didn't know yet.

Next time I'm gonna look for people "passionate" about what they do and "interested in making great projects".

(biggest facepalm moment)
So this happened...
We were suppose to submit a project in the name of app development.
Being our first app, it was a simple Android app having simple features which any e-commerce app would have.
On the day of evaluation, we handed our mobile (which already had our app) to our evaluator, to have a feel of our app.
After few swipes here and there, the evaluator said this,(which blew our mind)...
Don't be so smart,... Here take my IPhone and run your app on it! I want to see if it works on my IPhone like it does on yours or not.
The next thing our group was doing was to look at each other's face,.. completely stunned what to say next!
(If confused, read tags...) :/

I'm gonna decline the next time someone asks me "hop in chat with them" to discuss their stackoverflow problem.

I'd already given my two cents about the problem in question and I thought something was unclear about that so I say okay what the hell, made a chat room and invited him in.

Him: So I have this OTHER problem with [insert JS plugin]
Me: ... I don't know enough about it. I've used that specific plugin maybe once. The question I offered you my help with was PHP.
Him: Yeah but can you take a look really quick?
Me: I'd have to reread the documentation. I literally don't remember how to use it.
Him: No problem, here's the documentation. I want to do X, Y and Z.
Me: I don't think you can X without doing A and B first.
Him: I was told not to do A, so how can I do X, Y and Z?

Fucking hell I'm not gonna do your job for you. You know english. There is documentation available. Just read it and at least try things.

Do these NPC devs even read the README of a project before spewing some dumbass stackoverflow like garbage in an issue thread?

Do your damn job. Being a good software engineer is not like TiKtOk or cHaTgPt where some "magical" answer or entertainment is spoon fed to you, do your absolute best to solve it yourself first, before causing more chaos out in the opensource world.

Your favourite comment?

My team was working on a legacy system, one part of it is an assistant, sadly required as global variables.

Being a non-english-first-language company, some dev years ago thought shortening said assistant to "ass" would be a wise idea - less to type, right?

When we redid the application 2016 part-by-part, our code needed to define 3-4 global variables starting with the "ass" prefix for the legacy parts to work. The colleague who was tasked with this is a fine gentleman from England.

Later as I read through the commit, I found 5 lines of code following 20 lines of comments explaining and deeply apologizing for "ass", "ass_open", etc.

The same dev also had a "HACK OF THE YEAR" comment he moved around when time constraints made a less-than-optimal fix necessary which was worse than the last "highscore".

being a first year IT student:

- help, I can't check-in to my flight
- my computer is slow, I heard you can fix it (still runs xp)
- can you fix the printer?

- my laptop is broken (error message pops up with the actual solution) and there was an error
- did you read it?
- did I read what?

Is this gonna get better anytime soon?

Spent the last days trying to reach paypal tech support, hung on the phone across the globe, with people at paypal CS, who weren't even familiar with their own terminology, read tons of VERY 'straightforward' documentation and it kept me up two nights straight.

ALL because I REFUSED to believe that it is like I understood it between the lines that I read.

Today I got my answer. You can create Billing Plans (rules on which you'll base your subscriptions, i.e. amount, intervals, duration..) ONLY over the rest api, and only when a customer purchases a first subscription, you're able to EDIT the plan on Paypal dashboard!

What fuckery is that!? You have a edit form, but you can not provide a create form?! TY paypal for making me build a whole billing plan manager for usually a one time transaction per website.

I AM SENDING YOU MY PHONE BILL.

What is the point of disabling the fullscreen button on a youtube video embed?

And funnily enough, I seem to find this on a lot of sites for software, that have a demo video embedded the page or some shit, like a screen recording in this tiny little frame where I can't read anything because it's in this 400 pixel wide box, that I can't fullscreen. I don't understand it at all! What purpose does it serve? You're actually encouraging me to leave your stupid site to view the damn video on youtube.com so I can actually read the text in your stupid ass video.

Why does youtube even give you the option to remove the fullscreen button in your embeds in the first place? They even recently removed some of the "modest branding" features, like hiding the title, or removing the recommended videos at the end, but they thought that this feature was valuable enough to keep?

This may seem irrational to complain about, but I'm confused and befuddled more than anything else? If I'm embedding a video on a website, the last thought I have in my mind is "Oh, I really don't want people to see my video fullscreen. Better make sure I disable that!"

VSCodium, just for a little moment, please go fuck yourself.

I mostly use netbeans but for just a little I'm using VSCodium (VSCode without the Microsoft calling home bullshit).

Just had this error I didn't see that fast and then, usually, whenever you put your cursor on the tee underlined code, it tells you the error in this drive-by popup thingy.

The goddamn popup disappears so fucking quick that its impossible to read.

Ended up trying to capture a screenshot in time which worked at try number 10+, then saw the error and corrected it.

VSCodium go fuck yourself. I'm not ready for this shit when I've just woken up and haven't fully drank my first coffee yet (or this is more like a triple espresso as for strength)

😡

!rant
I'm developing an OS. I tried running it on the laptop that's on the ground. Everything works fine except text mode. There is no output when running it in text mode(not the high resolution one shown on image). Since the OS sends all data that is printed to the first serial port I might as well read the output from the serial ports. Since the laptop I use for development doesn't have any serial ports I had to use the older Windows 98 PC. For unknown reasons I could not get any output from the serial ports so I gave up.
tl;dr I wasted some time trying to debug my OS.
Image of my debugging setup(taken with the latest potato).

!rant
So my pm gave me a task and estimated it to 6 days. I was like, well, thats a vacation for me isn't it :). I started it 3 days later and read the description... Get these api into this app..etc..mvp and all... so I worked on the views first. Later I found out that the api were totally incompatible, and no such data was found or COULD BE MADE for the app. that was day 1 :)
I kept publishing apks with empty views, nice empties If I do say so, and just said we have to wait for backend to make tokens and data. Vacation starts, (sorry boss if you're reading this :D)
On day 6, the PMs were just rushing up and down, contacting backend, back to me, then backend, office ping pong, (a lovely sight), til the senior SysAdmin said, its impossible. Of course I knew this, buuuut, who would miss such a lovely opportunity.

PS: to all PMs, keep on dreaming those impossible ideas :)

Hi from Guatemala! I am new to devRant, now it's a must read every day, so much fun! I just landed my first job and I am very nervous/happy. My part of the job is to make the frontend using Flutter, I have some experience on Android but I feel it's very different. Lets see how it goes!

Ahh it's been a while since I've posted.. My skills with python are getting better (I'm a beginner) and I know for everyone else it's probably nothing but my first big project/idea I came up with was to program a simple rock paper scissors game that prints if you win lose or tie. I got the input and random output right without having to look anything up and that actually makes me proud of myself which is rare but for the printing out you win, lose, or tie I looked it up but I'm noticing that I'm getting better.

Then today I made a coin flip script that returns heads or tails in like 2 minutes and the only reference I used was my own code!!

Thanks if anyone actually read it I envy a lot of you for doing it for a living and I can't wait to do it too :)

Well, this is a rant about devRant! Sorry.
I like devRant, especially when my internet connection is fast. But when it is not, it is very annoying to wait for a rant to load whenever I click [read more]. I found myself skipping interesting rants that I want to read just coz I don't wanna be waiting doing nothing during the loading screen!
Suggestions for how to improve this:
- Just like facebook and devRant web app, Increase the limit of the text that loaded when loading the rants feed. Not all of it has to be visible in the feed, but when clicking read more, show the rest so I can continue reading the rant while the comments are loaded.
- If not, then like youtube, load the whole rant first from the server when clicking read more before loading the comments.
- (Even for short rants) when clicking on a rant, show the loaded text while fetching the rest of the rant. This way I can at least click the rant, and continue reading till the rest of it (or comments) is loaded.

1) Read the wiki on git. I probably have enough shorthands and test methods that you won't need much other shit to debug issues.

2) when debugging, remember that if it is there, there's a good reason why I put it there.

3) commented-out code is probably useful for maintenance. I left it there for a good reason. 😛

4) chances are whatever I wrote, was the state of the art at the time I wrote it. There might be better ways to do it now tho.

5) I always work modular. First, understand the structure. (probably also documented on wiki) DO NOT fuck up the structure. If you change it, you document it.

6) If you feel I wrote shit, it's probably because management annoyed the living shit out of me. Pun intended.

7) Your confusion is normal. I don't do dumb shit.

Just spent an entire night eaning up my codebase...

I optimized some of the functions got rid of unnecessary global variables and changed up the whole file hirearchy so it would be easier to read. After spending all night doing this I went to run the program and for once it seemed everything worked right the first time! However a portion of my application that is supposed to happen at a certain date and time never would run. After spending all night comparing each and every line for what I changed versus my last commit I couldn't find the fallacy in my logic. Everything should still work like it did before. After spending more time looking for bugs I finally realized I didn't break anything when I switched over to this new structure it was the old code that was broken. I went through the old code and after some debugging eventually found the culprit an extra continue statement that prevented my loop from fully executing. Lesson learned sometimes the biggest bugs can spawn from one line of code.

So yesterday ended with me becoming a first responder in front of my house. Talk about a crazy day.

Guy sped up down my very short dead-end road and flipped a school van down the embankment. Thankfully there were no kids in the van and the driver was okay.

I've never had to run into the scene of an accident before, and what the brain does in a time of crisis like that is absolutely amazing.

Feeling everything but the immediate need drain away. It was like time was slowed. I took in all the information of the scene and somehow worked fast while also double-checking every action I did.

I remember hesitating for a moment, worried about what I'd see. School students on the back. Would I see injured or dead children? Body parts? I remember saying "Fuck it" and running down the embankment and that was about it.

So serious props to any of you who read this that also volunteer as EMT or fire/rescue. I've long considered doing that myself and I may very well step up now that I've had first-hand experience.

And now for the requisite joke: Usually I only have to help out when Windows crashes. :)

I have come across the most frustrating error i have ever dealt with.
Im trying to parse an XML doc and I keep getting UnauthorizedAccessException when trying to load the doc. I have full permissions to the directory and file, its not read only, i cant see anything immediately wrong as to why i wouldnt be able to access the file.
I searched around for hours yesterday trying a bunch of different solutions that helped other people, none of them working for me.
I post my issue on StackOverflow yesterday with some details, hoping for some help or a "youre an idiot, Its because of this" type of comment but NO.
No answers.
This is the first time Ive really needed help with something, and the first time i havent gotten any response to a post.
Do i keep trying to fix this before the deadline on Sunday? Do i say fuck it and rewrite the xml in C# to meet my needs? Is there another option that i dont even know about yet?
I need a dev duck of some sort :/

long rant;

How did I got into CS?

When I first got my laptop, I put on a password and forgot it. Nobody knew those things at that time around me (most of them, still don't) so I had to pay ₹350 (~$5) for formatting (OS reinstallation).
After a week, I again forgot the password and had no guts to ask more money from my family, because of the fear of getting scolded.

So, I took out the manuals that had shipped with the laptop, read them all. Found nothing.
But, on a very small page, a single line was written, "Insert the disc. Press F12 after pressing the power button".
I intuitively tried it and it worked (I had the OS DVD and no internet).

And I spent the next year experimenting with the windows OS (Vista).
Then tried all the other OSs.

Those were some times..2008..I guess.
Learnt OS without the internet. Nowadays people can't do it even with it.

What's your story?

God damnit Quora!

I stumbled upon some article or post or whatever they are called on quora.
And I really wanted to read the comments on it. It wouldn’t let me unless I log in.

I normally don’t do that but I thought I’ll make an exception because I really wanted to read the comments.

So I clicked on that comments button and logged in (via google). First it presented me some modal dialog to pick 5 things that interest me. And it was mandatory. Fine… I picked those 5 things.

Finally it presents me the list of articles or whatever. But not the same list that I have seen before I was logged in. Scrolling, the article of my interest is not there. God damnit! Just show me my comments for fucks sake.

I go back to that tab where I was not logged in to somehow copy the link of that article or the link to the comments section. But it doesn’t let me. Some bullshit pseudo smart layer of crap is preventing me from doing anything.

Then I abuse the fucking share link to visit it in my logged in tab to finally see the comments that I came for.

And the comments weren’t even worth it. God! What a waste of time! And how can one fuck up a fucking forum so much?

It will be a lesson for me not to visit Quora ever again.

I was reminded of people's posts about preferred text editors in another post, so I thought I'd do the same, but also add some super old technology that I used along the way.

The first text editor I consistently used was pico. I used it to write my first webpage at school.edu/~username. It was a natural choice, because the it was the default text editor in pine, which is what we would all use for our email after opening a serial connection to the college's Digital Unix server. Or if we were the lucky ones who had a computer in a wired dorm, telnet. My dorm was not wired until my sophomore year.

I got my first job in tech in 2001, working as a night shift tier-one support technician. By this time, most people were using web based email, or POP3, but I wanted to keep using pine (or elm, or mutt) because I was totally in love with the command line by this time, and had been playing with Linux for two or three years by now. I arranged a handshake deal with a guy in my home town who had a couple well-connected NetBSD servers, to let me have an account on one for email and web hosting (a relatively new idea at the time).

I recall telnetting into my shared hosting account from the HP-UX workstations we had in the control room. I would look at webpages on HTML conventions and standards, and I kept seeing references to this thing called vi. I looked into it more deeply, and found that it was a text editor, and was the reason I always had to CTRL-Z out of elm. I was already finding pico to be lacking, so I found a modern implementation of vi called vim that was already installed on the aforementioned NetBSD server, and read through vimtutor on it. I was hooked instantly. The modality massively appealed to me, and I found editing files to be an absolute delight, compared to pico, and its nascent open source offspring/successor, nano.

My position on that hasn't changed in the years that have passed since then.

What's your text editor origin story?

So I had a really big personal project the last 2 years, which certainly thaught me a lot. But on Tuesday this week it got shut down. How you ask? Let me first explain what kind of project it was.

It was a mobile application for my school to look up substitutions and events, read news and some other stuff. I talked about it with the principal a lot, but back 1 year they said there were too few features. So the last year I spent improving and adding features.

Then the last few weeks, it was time to make everything ready and talking with the leadership of the school about everything necessary. Then one big problem arose. No teacher in school could maintain the app, the ones who maintained IT-Stuff at school left this year.

So it was decided to "kill" the app and wait for an IT interested teacher to come.

And now every day of the week, I sat infront of my PC and didn't know what to do...

A puzzle, just for fun.

Two friends, (a)lice and (b)ob are communicating through a channel encrypted with random numbers XOR'd together, like so:

keyA = randint(1024, 1024**2)
keyB = randint(1024, 1024**2)

msg = randint(1024, 1024**2)

You, an interloper, have watched all these communications, siphoning the packets as they went.

When alice sends a message to bob's mailbox, she does it like so:

mailBoxB = keyA^msg

Bob's mailbox receives the mail automatically, and applies his own key, sending it back to alice's mailbox:

mailBoxA = keyB^mailBoxB

Next, Alice's mailbox notices the message, and automatically removes her key and sends it back to bob's mailbox. All of this, the first message, the second, and the third, happens in milliseconds, the back and forth.

mailBoxB2 = mailBoxA^keyA

Finally, bob's mailbox removes his key, and deposits the now unencrypted message in his box, for him to read in the morning:

mailBoxBFinal = mailBoxB2^keyB

As as a spy, you know the first packet sent to bob, had a value of 589505.

The packet bob sent back to alice, after applying his key, has a value of 326166

The message sent *back* to bob after alice removed *her* key, had a value of:
576941

What are the values of keyA, keyB, and what is the value of the msg?

Earlier this day, I was about to start a new project. So I copied my favourite gulpfile.js into that projects root and installed all dependencies with npm. After running Gulp for the first time it threw an error.

Silly me tried to fix stuff and got googling the error and trying random things... After a break of a few hours I just fucking rerun Gulp and read the fucking error completely. It stood there. The fucking solution just stood there, run "npm blah --force" to reconfigure package blah....

Of course it worked right away and I finally could start working. But this shit took way too long. Why I just can't read the fucking error message. Damn

Last time, working on a project with two mates at school.

I'm the one who knows how to read and understand correctly a doc for low-level c libraries (portaudio, opus) and working on sockets.

I make the barebone of our server. Co-workers should work on socket client.

After a week, the socket client is ugly, and almost unusable.
I rewrite the socket client in two days.

Co-worker, for a week : "the only contribution of Orionss is deleting my code" (it wasn't the first time)

In these moments, I would like to kill this guy

So I'm making a file uploader for a buddy of mine and I got an error that I had never seen before. Suddenly I had C++ code and some other weird shite in my terminal. Turns our that I got a memory leak and the first thing that sprung to mind was "Fuck yes, I get to do some NCIS ass debugging".

Now the app worked fine for smaller files, like 5MB - 10MB files, but when I tried with some Linux ISO's it would produce the memory leak.

Well I opened the app with --inspect and set some breakpoints and after setting some breakpoints I found it. Now, for this app I needed to do some things if the user uploads an already existing file. Now to do that I decided to take the SHA string of the file and store it in a database. To do this I used fs.readFile aaaaaaaaaand this is where it went wrong. fs.readFile doesn't read the file as a stream.

Well when I found that, boy did I feel stupid :v

A couple of weeks ago I had an internship. I worked there with a classmate. We had a simple assignment, but since we're noobs when it comes to web applications (and because you don't learn that in school), we even had a hard time preparing.

Finally, I... I mean "we" decided to use React because it's close to the way we learned to solve problems in school. I asked him to implement a page with a date picker/calendar. I even searched for a repo that. 2 Days later he was still not able to implement it, he experimented with the code, but he
1. didn't even read the readme, just copied the tutorial expecting it to work
2. Didn't even look at the logic behind it.
3. Demanded to use this other repo with less functionality

10-30 minutes should have been more than enough. Instead, I wasted time telling him to read and code properly. He refused the second (and probably also the first), because "Why should I care? We'll be here for 3 weeks and then we're done with this"

Guess whom I'll avoid in any possible group project

Most web developers have to use CSS every now and then. I don't really mind using CSS every know and then, but one thing really bugs me. As a developer, I read ! as "not". In CSS !important becomes "not" important. However, when I read CSS I still read "not" important, when I know this really worked the other way around.

BTW, when I first came across !important many years ago, I really thought it meant a rule was not important, really confusing!

> Be me
> Using another country's public transit system for the first time
> QR reader can't read my bus ticket
> Ask the bus driver about it

"Sir, can I check myself in here?"
"Very high-tech system, isn't it?"
"Sir, I'm a programmer..."
"Shitty system then? Maybe you could fix it?"
(thinking: you're not paying me for this you bastard, and if you want me to get a manual for this piece of shit to repair what should've worked in the first place, you're sorely mistaken...)
"Probably I'm the kind of person who would... Anyway the ticket is valid."
I didn't bother checking the ticket afterwards.

All I wanted to do was get on your bus mate 😐

A few months ago I ranted about how my first encounter with Assembly was hopefully the last one

Here I am, again, with my second Assembly encounter. However, this time I'm able to read and understand it more, such that I'm even able to compute stack layouts. I don't even hate it that much anymore.

I guess I'm walking the path I couldn't defeat

*cries in %rax*

Chat apps. What's the idea? Those are basically tools of violence. They give you a possibility to in real-time stop someones work and start demanding service. Now. Immediately.

Usually people send you first email and then they after 10 seconds chat "did you see my email?? read it! serve it! please me!" Usually it's just a small request to document something, review someone else's document. Do it ASAP. If you were coding something, then drop it and do someones job for them instead.

You got a request for me to create some verification case list? Put it into my backlog. I might start doing that in week or two. Or month. In case there's nothing else more important. Since I know that you are working with something that you think is the whole universe, but trust me, I got my own problems already.

But hey, if I don't reply to your chat in a minute, please feel free to walk behind me and start explaining your life. No need to wait even for me to get my headphones off. "Oh you are in conf call? Well, this is just a quick thing blaa blaa..."

I'm a junior dev less than 1 year into my first job out of college. I'm halfway done reading Clean Code (my first software book out of college) and I'm really enjoying it!

What should I read next? I was thinking something about design patterns. Should I go for the classic GoF book or continue with Robert C Martin and read "Agile Software Development, Principles, Patterns, and Practices"?

A few days back I read an article about ethical hacking and get rewarded for bug bounty. I thought that might be interested.

AND

I'm about to send out my first ethical hack report to a company! I'm nervous because I don't know how they'll respond. It's an xss vulnerability, and I really hope they'll fix it.

First rant from my new job.
I got a position as backend-dev in a startup and for now i'm learning angular. Yes, you read that correctly, because the frontend-team is short-staffed i decided to switch teams. We are 3 people and neither one has sufficient angular-experience (the framework was a management decision).
First of all i got confused because we use slack and trello but the frontend-lead decided to do some stuff via google-spreadsheet too. Then we didn't have any code in our repository until yesterday. I tried to check out the repository after that, did an npm-install but when running ng serve i got an error "css-file not found". It turns out you had to download some files from the official website and put them in the unversioned node_modules directory. It was the teamlead's decision to do so and me and my coworker got really annoyed when we tried to set up everything on our end. But that's not all, yesterday the other dev's merged their first versions of the project. But not via git, that is way to mainstream. The coworker had to upload his code into the cloud and the teamlead copied the files into the project folder.
Aside from that the code already isn't the best, some things should be done differently imo and we have credentials in the code (not in some separate files, but in an if-else-clause that checks node.env.production).

We'll have a discussion about this tomorrow, let's hope things can be straightened out.

We have this one professor in a mathematics course.
He sits there having no plan of what he's doing. He literally opens his python Jupiterbook with latex enabled, writes a complex equation and tries to solve it in 10 minutes. Makes mistakes every few steps and deletes his formatted equation that isn't even interpreted yet (we see the cdot etc. instead of * which makes it even harder to read). Every few minutes some student corrects him and he deletes it again.

Why can't you just think first and then write and try to teach us?
Use as much time as you want as long as you don't have to keep reverting back the humanly unreadable latex equation.

Hell, you are also allowed to use a basic pen and paper. Trust me, that shit is more readable, even if you have a bad handwriting, than your squeezed in complex untranslated latex equation in Jupiterbook.

Btw. he also streams with no zooming in I might add.

Am I supposed to trying to read your small as shit, focus on what you're teaching while you keep making mistakes or write it down on paper and practice the given tasks?

On top of that, he records the zoom conference but he doesn't share it anywhere on the college forum so that people who have missed it can download it and rewatch it.

Everything he does makes no sense. How did he become a mathematics professor with a PhD?

Warning: this is not a rant. I'm too happy and excited to rant right now.

Today I "finished" my first webpage!!!

Wohooo!

It's the blog I'll use. It's currently offline for obvious reasons but I intend to put it out there when I have more confidence on my skills and some content to put in it. I only used django, html and css, and I really dig the looks of it. My gf liked it so it can't be that ugly.

I still have a lot to learn with django, and I will add a thing or two to this
webpage but now I feel confident enough to make the backbone of my first real project : a platform to ease essay writing for history students. It's something simple for students to keep track of their essays thesis and ideas but also the bibliography they'll use and the thesis and ideas they think each text they read for the essay has. I intend later to extend the functionality so it can store all the texts the user has used in some useful and atractive manner so they can keep track of everything they've read, share it and use it for later works.

I'm so fucking excited I can't fucking sleep (it's 3 am right now).

Was just reading some of the OpenVPN scripts to renew a certificate where I forgot to source the vars file first (apparently OpenVPN stores those in a separate file that you always have to source first, and I tend to forget it sometimes).

Reading the revoke-full script that OpenVPN provides, it's just bash so I can read it no problem. But traversing through it and trying to understand it... Horrible! There's a test file in $RT named keys/revoke-test.pem. It's not used anywhere in OpenVPN for anything useful as far as I'm aware. The script however - the script that's running on a production server! - attempts to remove this file. It doesn't exist. Test files do (or at least should) not exist in production. They're not supposed to be there.

It exports empty variables. Some of them are set by the sourced vars file, some aren't. Not entirely sure why it's exporting variables as empty when they're uninitialized, or why it doesn't just unset the ones that are initialized.

And finally it goes ahead and revokes the key file that I'm actually concerned about through regular OpenSSL and verifies it.

Not to mention that the lack of the sourced vars file, which admittedly I should think about in the current status quo, if it *always* needs to be sourced anyway... Why doesn't the script do that itself then? One less thing to go wrong. But hey, proper design?

Gore. I don't have any other words for it.

And before anyone tells me that I should go and fix it if I'm so worried about it. Remember, I am not a developer. That's the job of the developers that made this in the first place.

Hey guys, wanna install Linux first time, but had some doubts.
Config - core 2 duo 2.93GHz, 2GB ddr2 ram, 320 hdd, AMD graphics card.
Doubts :
1. After writing it on usb and setting it in usb boot mode, the system didn't read the pen drive data ... is it because of the writing software ... I used power iso.
2. What about the partitions ? Do they still remain and will the install guide only ask to format the c drive or the whole hdd ?
3. Which distro do y recommend... I had kali/debian/fedora/mint in mind
My friends complained about fedora taking 45 seconds to boot up, I don't know about the other distro's ..
Thanks in advance

I remember the first time I was experimenting with Linux and decided to install Kali Linux (was still version 1 at the time) and in the process cleaned my hard drive. I was in first year and I hadn't been introduced to git, so you can imagine what happened to my code.

Or when I dumped all my databases into one SQL file (the feature looked tasty in phpmyadmin) and then after reinstalling everything, I couldn't import back the files.

Or last year, where I was on industrial attachment. So we were to delete some data from DHIS2 manually. So as a developer I grouped all organisation units to be deleted under one parent and wrote a python script to recursively delete anything in that group. Just when I was about to show my supervisor how efficiently my script was deleting stuff, he said, "Don't delete anything yet". I hope he doesn't read this *wink*

Fast forward, last week on Friday I dropped my external hard drive. It just works on one USB port now, no idea how and why.

Nearly me this morning:

Hi, thanks for reaching out to me to see if we'd be interested in partnering on the attached R&D project. I'd love to read the proposal but first, can we talk about your personal website? I noticed the link in your email footer and it offends my eyes beyond belief. Will there scope in the project to address this issue?

Finally got a new laptop at work!
The first thing to do: install linux in it so the beast could roar free.

Download mint iso, dd it into an usb drive, boot it up in uefi mode, .... /dev/sda read error: -110. Fuck, must be smth w/ secure-boot. Disable it, rinse and repeat. Same error. Wtf, could my drive be broken?
dd iso into another usb drive, boot live env -- read error. THE FUCK! It's wildly unlikely my both usb drives died on the same fucking day!

Go to it admin to ask for an usb drive. Iso->usb, boot -- live env is up. My my, look who's unfortunate today :)

cryptsetup, install, reboot et voila, the beast is finally roaring!

I really don't mind it as long as the work is on track but damn it hurts to read the git commit messages with messed up spellings. In some cases it's not just that, but variable names, file names, etc. as well.

English isn't the first language in my country and a lot of people are not as proficient with it so it's probably not appropriate to judge, but the cringe is real.

Sometimes I wonder if I am that cringeworthy person to someone else.

So I'm trying to get used to using vim and I've spent a couple of days setting up my vimrc and practising commands and what not.

Come today I'm doing my first proper coding session and my codes sending back weird errors and I can't work out why

Then when I read very carefully I find :w somewhere it's not supposed to be... Of course I'd forgetten to enter normal mode a ton of times and now my code is littered with :wq and :w so I spent a few minutes combing my code to find them all and it all works now.

Am I an elite hacker now?

Other team lead: Hi DevOps Team, We need you to deploy this app to production. It's maintainers gave up on it in 2019, but we looked at it and it feels right.

Me: Uhm. That's not going to work. It'll fail the security scan before you can even finish the build in CI.

Other team lead: Yeah, this app is the right thing to do, and we needed it last week, but since that won't work, we'll just use this other very very infant technology that was just born yesterday. It's not stable in production, or on MySQL, or in AWS at all, but it's the other direction we can to go.

Me: What problem are you trying to solve in the first place?

Other team lead: Oh, we need access to the read from the production database.

I think tech recruiters will be among the first to have their job taken over by AI. Even I can write an "AI" that goes through LinkedIn profiles, doesn't read them at all, and sends their owners a job posting chancing it might be relevant.

Probably the only reason it hasn't happened already is LinkedIn's TOS.

...Cheaper and at least as effective as the real thing.

Prediction of a future rant:

Guys I'm starting a Devrant addiction recovery movement.

I've become addicted since it fills me with delight to read all the rants.
It's so bad that my work has suffered.

The first step is admitting I have a problem

Actually it doesn't matter, all my projects get canceled anyway so noone noticed I stopped coding.

I am a little bit old fadhioned when it comes to new dev tech stuff. I am at first, not an early adopter ( others should proof it first) and second I like to read books. If there is someone who has understood the matter and has written a book, then I go for it 😁 and third, when I have to use an early technology then the simplest thing is to read the doc to get a grasp what this is all about. Youtube as others describes is lame, because if you are forced to watch 40min when you are just interested in one small thing, you will loose a lot of time finding the relevant piece of content..

Positive on reading is, that you have to think for yourself!

Started a job as a full stack developer. My first task was shocking! Do these small edits on this backend script that collects stuff from one database and edits the entries in another... piece of cake so far!

Here is the project on the TFS...
HOLD ON! IS THIS VISUAL BASIC?!!
I came here to do .Net framework development and .Net Standard... I wasn’t told that there will be VB, I have never used vb.net before.

Now... that I’m going to maintain this script in the future, I decided to rewrite it in C#, few things I learned on my journey of doing this:
1- There is an access modifier in VB called Friend
2- There is a data structure/type called Collection, it’s a value,key pair! Not key value pair... Value first, then key!!
3- Do you know how null is null everywhere?!! In VB they call it Nothing! Yes, as in...
if(myVar == nothing)
{
//stuff
}
Asking the guy responsible for that choice... he thinks VB is easier to read than C#
I DONT WANT YOU TO READ IT, I WANT IT TO MAKE SENSE AND WORK WITH THE REST OF THE C# CODE WE HAVE!!

How on earth are there people in their second year of a computer science course who are unable to understand how to read build errors. It's honestly not that hard, just look at the fucking build log and see where the error is and what type of error it is, but yet they don't bother reading the log and say that their "compiler is broken" when their 5 line code won't work.

If this was still first year I'd understand since many of the class didn't have much programming knowledge, but if you're in your second year and you struggle with this (that too for a Hello World script) it looks like you aren't even bothered and just expect the computer to magically understand what you mean.

This is a story of how I did a hard thing in bash:

I need to extract all files with extension .nco from a disk. I don't want to use the GUI (which only works on windows). And I don't want to install any new programs. NCO files are basically like zip files.

Problem 1: The file headers (or something) is broken and 7zip (7z) can only extract it if has .zip extension

Problem 2: find command gives me relative to the disk path and starts with . (a dot)

Solution: Use sed to delete dot. Use sed to convert to full path. Save to file. Load lines from file and for each one, cp to ~/Desktop/file.zip then && 7z e ~/Desktop/file.zip -oOutputDir (Extract file to OutputDir).

Problem 3: Most filenames contain a whitespace. cp doesn't work when given the path wrapped in quotes.

Patch: Use bash parameter substitution to change whitespace to \whitespace.

(Note: I found it easier to apply sed one after another than to put it all in one command)

Why the fuck would anyone compress 345 images into their own archive used by an uncommon windows-only paid back-up tool?
Little me (12 years old) knowing nothing about compression or backup or common software decided to use the already installed shitty program.

This is a big deal for me because it's really the first time I string so many cool commands to achieve desired results in bash (been using Ubuntu for half a year now). Funny thing is the images uncompressed are 4.7GB and the raw files are about 1.4GB so I would have been better off not doing anything at all.

Full command:
find -type f -name "*.nco" |
sed 's/\(^./\)/\1/' |
sed 's/.*/\/media\/mitiko\/2011-2014_1&/' > unescaped-paths.txt

cat unescaped-paths.txt | while read line; do echo "${line// /\\ }" >> escaped-paths.txt; done

rm unescaped-paths.txt

cat escaped-paths.txt | while read line; do (echo "$line" | grep -Eq .*[^db].nco) && echo "$line" >> paths.txt; done

rm escaped-paths.txt

cat paths.txt | while read line; do cp $line ~/Desktop/file.zip && 7z e ~/Desktop/file.zip -oImages >/dev/null; done

Forced choice between two options which both seemingly have irreversible and potentially destructive consequences. Tapping back or outside the modal doesn't dismiss it. No 'Read more' type link for the first option.

Laws and regulations against dark pattern design when?

edit: okay the readmore link is passable but I still want to be grumpy about it.

Had this life not turned out the way it is. Had you not been a dev, what would you imagine you would have been?

I'll go first.. i would probably have been a librarian or a security guard. Someone with lot of time at hand to read.

So,
Yesterday was Google CodeJam's Kickstart event ( or something like that ).
Participated in competitive programming for the first time. It was kinda fun I guess...
Nope I still hate competitive programming. I like being a laid back programmer who develops in his own pace.
I know it's not what industry wants but I can't jst go for competitive programming.

On the positive note, I started using goto in C++ because of it and created a better Graph library than I had before 🤗🤗

P.S. I did read on how to use goto and when to not use it. I guess my usage was fine... Or better yet, IT WORKED 😜😂

Well, I am done as far as competitive programming goes... 😭😭

It's embarassing and you guys will find it either rude or annoying but I have readied myself and here goes my confession;

Whenever I see the abbreviation for Command line interface I cringe. You know because cli ? And I read it in my head as 'Kli' which is like the shortened form of a female part ?
I can't just read it as "See, el, ai" or think 'Command line interface' directly.
My brain's first thought is it must be an acronym so you should read it like how you would read NASA which is also an acronym and not like 'cmd' which is not an acronym but just an abbreviation.
Thus whenever I see it I feel a mixture of embarassment, self-loathing and physical discomfort.

I wonder how can I not be embarassed and cringing whenever I see Something-CLI.
I just noticed when it's in uppercase I don't cringe as much. I should code a chrome extension to change all CLI abbreviations to upper case.

1) Let me work with devs without me having to explain fundamentals of programming

2) Stop devs from copy pasting code from StackOverflow or any other project without actually understanding what it does

3) Get devs to actually read and understand project documentation FIRST before jumping into any programming work

I find it way easier to read code than ordinary text.

Am I the only one? Do I have a problem?
After the first sentence my I eyes can't focus to keep reading text. This also happens to my native language except from English.

Ohhhhhh shit, this is a good topic.

Well, I just expected more... Better.

Like maybe the programming lecture could have been Java 1.6 rather than 1.2, and taught rather than read from an archaic time of dusty powerpoints.

Maybe we could have used Spice or a reputable circuit modelling tool rather than CircuitMaker; a tool no longer being maintained that barely makes it past install because it was written in a time before circuits.

Maybe day fucking one of the first year, happy clappy, let's teach you HTML lecture the tutor could have just shown us a copy-pasted hello world. Rather than the ugly, mixed-case, no-end-tag-having, broke ass HTML 4 scribble she felt the need to go over every detail of.

Hey fastlane!

Great tool and all, but your documentation is at 🤡 levels, I need to read 20+ pages to get a full overview and understanding. So far I've had to read a dozen plus blogs and stackoverflow posts to find hidden flows (authentication first to do this, etc. etc. etc.)

Don't market your tool as "reducing complexity & saving time" and showing one-liners in the docs when in reality there are lots of hidden steps and NOT one-liners!!!!!!

This is why everyone complains it takes 1-2 days to just get a freaking pipeline working!!!!🤡

When it comes to the idea of programming and magic, or the comparison between software developers/engineers, computer scientists etc as magicians or wizards, nothing brings the idea much more close to hearth than the C programming language.

A while ago I read the R.A Salvatore books concerning Drizzt, the dark elf. I loved the books, have not continued reading them but I remember them vividly. There was one book in which a human magician came about wielding extremely explosive magic, humans were capable of channeling large amounts of it through explosive and unwieldly ends.

This is the same feeling I get from C

Consider:
int items[] = {1, 2, 3};
printf("Third : %i\n", 3[items]);

and fuck me if shit like the above is not dangerous, it makes sense, arrays have the first items of it server as the pointer address to a first element, doing the above operation returns the third element of the array of 3. But holy shit if I don't think this is dangerous and interesting as fuck

there are many more examples I have that I am finding through me fucking around with: language development (compiler, interpreter), kernel programming as well as net sec. C is the most powerful and devastating thing we have in our hands indeed.

Posted a question on Stack Overflow today for the first time in as long time... Have lost faith, what shit some suggestions people have.

- Clear the cache, check again...🤨
- Your code is wrong, I tested it my way, you need to change.😒

Read the fucking post properly and gauge some level of expertise... I clearly wrote that it WAS working, the bull shit your detailing is completely irrelevant.

Fucking idiots...

Fuck you, previous lead architect dictator! I spent a year arguing against your rigid nonsense custom built bullshit, and a year and a half after the client finally caught on and got rid of you I just got bitten yet again from one of your retarded over-complicated "solutions" to problems that never existed in the first place.

I wish I could send you an email and tell you about how I have thrown out all the useless shit you created and that we are all clearly better off now, but instead I will just share my frustration on DevRant and hope you read it and know exactly who you are.

I feel sorry for your current client.

Two of em.
The first one was making a project following mvc patterns for my last job in which the structure was so easy to follow that my buddy has been able to move allong with it and do more projects out of it. He had a hard time with web development and the boss would have him do it and learn on the job.
To this day that application remains as a "framework" of sorts.
It was made in an unholy comb of js for the front end and classic asp for the backend with restful endpoints and all that shit. I was drunk when I coded most of it.

The other one was during my time in the u.s army. I was a mechanic, a really shitty one mind you. But i knew how to read manuals. All and every task was accomplished to the point in which they had me basically rebuild a vehicle that was beyond salvation. Got it done in 2 months and command was so impressed they set me up as the brigade commander's personal driver and mechanic. I was also drunk for the most part, but then again so where the rest of my brothers.

I started out on a Sinclair ZX 80. It has just 512 bytes of ram and you had to use a function button together with a key for each command since it did not have enough memory to keep the source in memory ;)

I attended few basic courses and then went on to hold them.

After a year there was suggestions of starting pascal courses so during the summer I read up in turbo pascal 5.5 but since the summer home did not have electricity I had to do it all theoretically for the first month before getting to try it out.

I got to try visual basic when doing school practice with Microsoft but the name was not set by then as it was a few months before the release.

Thats also where the more professional programming got going even though I did one pascal program that was used professionally before that.

Recently I have updated my lubuntu to 18.04.
I don't use it regularly but I like to have it on the side of my window 10.
Anyway today I boot and decide to use it and get this error.
[0.000000] [Firmware Bug]: TSC_DEADLINE disabled du to errata; please update microcode to version 0x22 (or later)
and two MMIO read fault.

At first it sounds really dramatic and I was thinking, "Nice ... I never get a problem with Windows Update and when its Linux it doesn't work ..."

But lubuntu boots normally after so it's not a blocking problem.

So I do what most of us do in case like this, go to Google and search to know what the hell is going on.

And the answer is simple, my CPU microcode isn't up to date to prevent Spectre, one apt get install and a reboot later my 4700HQ is patched in 0x24 version and protected for Spectre where my windows didn't patch anything and worst disable the KB that I have installed manually before the last big update.

So thanks Linux, you scared me with your error but it was a good job to throw it :)

Just graduated, first real internship.
So basically I'm the only one who do what I'm supposed to do, nobody can help me because they are on project that are totally different. Even my superior who hired me don't know what my predecessor exactly did, he just gave me his gitlab and said "continue... Whatever this shit was".
So I'm alone and the code of my "predecessor" doesn't work obviously because the half of the files are missing, the code has no explanation and he's not joignable. I have to build an algorithm of deep learning from scratch and to do a presentation in one month to explain to everyone why I'm not useless.
Is it really like this everywhere?? Is it the reason why DevRant was created??
I read the quotes when I was in school like "oh no c'mon that really never happened". Foolish boy I was..

But there's nice coffee

I don't understand some developer's thought processes when they fix a bug/issue.

Let's say the error is -> "Cannot read property id of undefined".

My first thought is to add a check for undefined and null and figure out if further code should be executed if a null or undefined is encountered, depending on what the code is supposed to do.

But some devs are like, "Yesterday the sunrise was at 5:30 AM, Earth's rotational axis is titled at 15 degrees to the left, My aunt asked me about how I am doing today, so therefore the bug fix is required at line 65,456 of this particular kernel file".

And they implement it, and it WORKS.

Weird.

I read the pragmatic programmer a few months ago. The book advised learning a different programming language every month or so. I was doing Advent of Code so I decided to try out Elm because functional programming is all the rage these days.
It took me one hour to convert a string of numbers to an array of numbers! And when I finally finished with that I couldn't understand how to compare each element with the next one in an array using map or filter.
I realised that I've become too comfortable using javascript. Worst case scenario: In a few years when javascript is obsolete I'll be like those old dudes that know only Cobol. Best case scenario: I'll always be too dumb to earn a nice salary.
On a positive note: The first time I tried Elm I didn't understand jack shit, now I understood a few things.

"I need a way to create PDFs from word documents"
"OK, here's Cute PDF, just print to it"
"Great, how does this work with my pdf letterhead?"
"Oh, well that's different, we'll need to create a word template with the letterhead pieces from the PDF. Here you go."
"OK, how do I merge the word documents generated by my fuckmess of a CRM software system?"
"You can copy and paste it, or we can purchase this software for you that should be able to do it"
"Why didn't you install that software first? You guys are useless"

Alright buddy, fuck you too. I'll be sure to automatically assume that even though your initial email is a full, complete request, that there's more behind it and read your mind through the email going forward.

Good code is like a good video game. When you read it first time, it feels like magic, and you feel like it does more than it actually can.

Saw this magazine at the store. Read it the wrong way around the first time.

¡rant|rant

Nice to do some refactoring of the whole data access layer of our core logistics software, let me tell an story.

The project is around 80k lines of code, with a lot of integrations with an ERP system and an sql database.

The ERP system is old, shitty api for it also, only static methods through an wrapper to an c++ library

imagine an order table.

To access an order, you would first need to open the database by calling Api.Open(...file paths) (yes, it's an fucking flat file type database)

Now the database is open, now you would open the orders table with method Api.Table(int tableId) and in return you would get an integer value, the pointer.

Now for the actual order. first you need to search for it by setting the search parameter to the column ID of the order number while checking all calls for some BS error code

Api.SetInt(int pointer, int column, int query Value)
Then call the find method.

Api.Find(int pointer)

Then to top this shitcake of an api of: if it doesn't find your shit it will use the "close enough" method of search.

And now to read a singe string 😑

First you will look in the outdated and incorrect documentation given to you from the devil himself and look for the column ID to find the length of the column.

Then you create a string variable with ALL FUCKING SPACES.

Now you call the Api.GetStr(int pointer, int column, ref string emptyString, int length)

Now you have passed your poor string to the api's demon orgy by reference.

Then some more BS error code checking.

Now you have read an string value 😀

Now keep in mind to repeat these steps for all 300+ columns in the order table.

News from the creators: SQL server? yes, sql is good so everything will be better?

Now imagine the poor developers that got tasked to convert this shitcake to use a MS SQL server, that they did.

Now I can honestly say that I found the best SQL server benchmark tool. This sucker creams out just above ~105K sql statements per second on peak and ~15K per second for 1.5 second to read an order. 1.5 second to read less than 4 fucking kilobytes!

Right at that moment I released that our software would grind to an fucking halt before even thinking about starting it. And that me & myself and I would be tasked to fix it.

4 months later and two weeks until functional beta, here I am. We created our own api with the SQL server 😀

And the outcome of all this...

Fixes bugs older than a year, Forces rewriting part of code base. Forces removal of dirty fixes. allows proper unit and integration testing and even database testing with snapshot feature.

The whole ERP system could be replaced with ~10 lines of code (provided same relational structure) on the application while adding it to our own API library.

Best part is probably the performance improvements 😀. Up to 4500 times faster and 60 times less memory usage also with only managed memory.

Finally, I have a night free of work today. It is the first time this month. I'm so happy to have some time to read and rest.

Life can be insane.

Enjoy the little things in life, because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.

A programme I have to maintain (and not allowed to optimise or change):

1) read input from serial connection
2) store data in MySQL database
3) every day convert to CSV
4) store on Windows file share
5) process CSV in access 2000
6) store in MsSQL database

When it was first developed, I said to te developer to store it straight from serial to MsSQL but out boss wanted it to follow the above spec.

He has now left and I have to maintain it

Another fun thing. This morning one of the first mails i read was a issue about a bug in our software.

This was a bug i mentioned months ago but there was nog evidence where i searched like mails chats or tickets.

If people would just listen to me this bug was solved months ago but back then i got a reaction like: "works over here" while i tested it on two different instances with buggy results each time.

I'm using Meteor for the first time, and it's fantastic. I never felt so comforted by a language. Then I saw the source of served html pages and it's puzzling and unintelligible and I don't like it. I'm afraid that someone goes in my website, read the source code and judge me 😞

Early 1970s, when I was around 8 years old. I read about Artificial Intelligence and it blew me away. I knew nothing about computers, other than I wanted to program them.

I still have old computer magazines, starting from around 1978 not long after the microcomputer revolution started.

My first computer had 2K RAM. That's 2048 bytes. I expanded the memory 1K at a time, and it took 2 chips - they were 4 bits by 1024 so you needed 2 chips to have 8 bit wide memory.

2114 static ram, 300ns.

I think they still make them!

Unity's "quirk" messed me up again. This time, I wanted the time when the key was pressed as precisely as possible, independent of the framerate.
So I put the input reading routine into the thread pool, which causes the first few readings to throw null reference exceptions. No biggie; the system needs a few moments to warm up. So, I try-catch that part.

But when I build the game, as soon as I reach the part where the game tries to read the input value, it hard-crashes before try-catch can act 🤦

I just hate it when a classmate just waits for you to do the work first so that they can copy it.

This recent project we had was a pretty good example. Most of them didn't know what to do while I on the other hand actually READ the documents for the technology we were using so it gave me sort of a head start. They eventually asked me to do one part of their work first so that they can copy off of what I did and I mean EVERYTHING. A pure copy paste of my code while only changing the variable names. Genius

If you just stay calm and focus on building, you'll eventually come across things you've always wanted to learn, but didn't really see the purpose of it, this applied to everything in life.

For example, today was the first time I needed to use generics in my app, this is something I've always wanted to learn but didn't truly understand it. I've read docs and watched videos online, but still didn't see the benefit of learning generics.

However, once I needed it, I realized why it is relevant, and thus created stronger memory muscles.

Let's break this down:
- You learn more if the thing you need has a purpose.

- Information is simply data, once you apply it, information turns to knowledge.

And this my fellow dev friends is what you get paid for, not information, but knowledge.

And what is knowledge? - experience.

Why are project/tool webpages so useless...?

I mean, whenever I hear of a new tool/project I google its name. Of course, its dedicated webpage pops up as result #1. And EVERY TIME I find them looking nice, but quite confusing, riddled with all the buzzwords, nice phrases, promises of a better tomorrow,... but I'm yet to find a tool's webpage that explains what's that tool for and how to use it at least half as concisely and clearly as that tool's README.md in its GH/GL repo.

I mean, I can read every single word in the webpage, look at every picture/diagram, every fancy gif and still in absolute majority of cases I have no clue what that tool does.
Then I go to its GH/GL repo, read the first 2 sections of its README.md (takes me what, 2-4 minutes?) and I know all I need to now about the tool.

What's the point of those fancy webpages apart from containing docs and an SEO-tuned link to a README.md...?

Useless waste of storage and computing power if you asked me.

Hi everyone, I'm a now second year computer science student. I have read through posts on Dev Rant for a while now and have loved every minute of it. I really wanted to start contributing to this awesome community and thought a question might be a good start. There seems to be a ton of inconsistencies among certain terms. The biggest that really grinds my gears is how people refer to "()", "[]", and "{}". I personally refer to the first set as parenthesis, the second as brackets, and the third as braces. Throughout my time at this college and around the internet I have read some people say curly braces, curly brackets, squigly brackets, round brackets, square braces, and my personal favorite "those curvy round things". Other students do this which is understandable, but it seemed strange that even my professors use them interchangeably. So is there a naming convention anywhere that might help with this issue or somewhere I can get some clarification?

Read docs, try, google, try, ask.
Do not ask too early, come up with something you already did when asking. But don't hesitate to ask when you're stuck.
No body wants to leave you on your own but you must try something before you ask.
Do not be afraid to share your opinion. It could be that your view is wrong then you need to correct it. But also it could be you have a point and it will be useful. The first will be helpful to you, the second to everyone in your team.

So I wrote the script for the GAL in WinCupl for our project. I used the operators: ! for NOT, * for AND, + for OR

me: *writes code*
me: *compiles it*
compiler: error, unknown operation.
me: wtf but thats how its done, isnt it?
friend: u used the wrong operators. didnt u read the manual?
me: smh i didnt, i invented the syntax xD

lesson learned: always read manual first before writing it directly without knowing the syntax

This story is related to Docker containers.

Three years back when I heard about docker my first impression of docker was mini Virtual Machine. Then when you start your first container it’s no way to get out apart from pressing ctrl+d or leaving it like a screen. One of the most embarrassing thing with it was I tried really really hard to setup SSH on one of the container to log in there somehow. Then I understood how to use Dockerfiles and the command called `docker exec`

I thought Dockerfiles are the most amazing thing I have ever used for docker. But then I got introduced to docker-compose, and now it’s same with kubernetes

Now a days I read most of the document before doing hands-on on any new technology.

So some of @ewpratten's rants just inspired me to tell my story of a somewhat ignorant teacher.

So we had an english class, it was abou Nelson Mandela or something, but I was sitting and learning about apache2(well I first learned about ncurses in python but since there was a command for restarting the apache server it got me curious, as usual). When she said something along the lines of(translated from.my language): "Then you read the text about Nelson Mandela, but other people are programming!". I was about to say that I was actually not programming, but setting up an apache server, but that would have been a dick move since she at least didn't accuse me for hacking.

No matter how many times, or whichever way I explain, he still doesn't get it. Are people so fucking blinkered they do not want to listen, or even read what you write. Back story, produced some web design visuals for a client, and fortunately he had the good sense to listen and employ a copywriter. She had the first draft done when i was putting together the styling, so i placed actual copy on the visuals. 2 weeks pass, still no answer. I send the same email to him, every 4 days and cc his PA for good measure. Finally, he says he wants to make some tweaks to the copy. I explain that any copy changes can be done via the CMS once the site is built, and can I proceed and build the site? He replies I need to make changes to the copy first. I explained again about the difference between the visual and the actual website, same response. You Fucking Infuriate me! Cunt!

Whatever the task needs.

New paradigm? Probably a book first approach.
Library/API: their own suggested tutorials and references cause that shit moves quick.

If I have to read a cave painting to understand an ancient card punch language I’ll happily do it.

I’ve found, when I don’t know something yet I get the “brick wall” feeling, that this is all going to be too difficult... I’ve learned to love that feeling.

If all else fails: RTFM.

You know that moment, when you look for something on wikipedia, and after few hiperlinks you are reading about influence of penguins on Mars' day length or othen nonsense?

Just happened to me like 4th time when reading Django documentation. It is so well written and easy to understand, that I just click and click and want to go deeper, and then realise I have to read what I need, because I never ever got to it in the first place.

Gotta love the people who make such docs. I never could, and prbly will.

Yesterday I bought a book. I did not know about it. So I read the first few pages before purchasing it. I did not look for the review online. I paid by card - not through my phone or contactless, just plain old card going into a chip and pin device.

This morning I got an advert in Facebook that I should buy the second part of the book. I know they snoop my online activity. In a weird way I kind of accepted it. I guess my question is how'd they know so much of my personal life.

I'd probably will leave Facebook today. I am sure they are watching this status as well. I hope the jackass behind this learns in my own small way I tried to stand up against their jackassery. Like everyone else here I from IT. I hope some one (or many) from this extraordinary community who is a lot more capable than I am, stands up to this invasion and make an end to this snooping.

Worst fight was at a former job. I complained about a senior-level employee who made unprofessional comments about me.

I asked followup questions about a request. I was told the request was correct. Turns out the other employee half read/didn’t read my question because she decided I was trying to cause trouble. When my boss reviewed my work and asked why it looked weird, other employee actually wrote in the JIRA comments “Oh, my apologies. I thought [name] was question the request. [name] changed the wrong thing.” She said the silent part out loud. And the wrong thing she accused me of changing…the website always looked like that and my boss told her so. (Also, not the first time she forgot what the website looked like.) But my boss didn’t make any JIRA comment about the “questioning the request” part.

My boss was really downplaying what had happened. Like other employee just made a mistake. That wasn’t a mistake. He wasn’t going to bring it up with other employee’s boss. It was weird because the incident was a written conversation so it was really hard to deny the facts. I also had the original email notification in case she tried to go back and change her comment. I think my boss either wasn’t used to defending his direct reports or didn’t have the power to do so since most of his department (including me) was slated for layoffs in a few months.

Well, I got the last laugh. A week later, I received an offer. I put in my notice during the company’s busiest time of year. And my boss actually asked me to extend my notice by three weeks. Really?! Expecting me to forgive and forget that whole “questioning the request” incident. I stuck with my original date.

I had my second interview today with the director .. He seems to be nice at first.. when he asked me do you read books I honestly said I don’t...he then asked me if I had like programming books with me.. I said no since all the lectures are all in ppt ... and I believe that is enough during colllege.. and they didn’t require us to have books.. I just felt that .. he did not like me just because of that..I like the company but I guess being honest also kills the opportunity..the second interview mainly focuses on fitting with the company culture...I just thought the interview went really fast.. It just seemed that they had this “ahh next!!” Kind of attitude when I left the room

So I decided to run mozilla deep speech against some of my local language dataset using transfer learning from existing english model.
I adjusted alphabet and begin the learning.
I have pc with gtx1080 laying around so I utilized that but I recommend to use at least newest rtx 3080 to not waste time ( you can read about how much time it took below ).

Waited for 3 days and error goes to about ~30 so I switched the dataset and error went to about ~1 after a week.
Yeah I waited whole got damn week cause I don’t use this computer daily.

So I picked some audio from youtube to translate speech to text and it works a little. It’s not a masterpiece and I didn’t tested it extensively also didn’t fine tuned it but it works as I expected. It recognizes some words perfectly, other recognize partially, other don’t recognize.

I stopped test at this point as I don’t have any business use or plans for this but probably I’m one of the couple of companies / people right now who have my native language speech to text machine learning model.

I was doing transfer learning for the first time, also first time training from audio and waiting for results for such long time. I can say I’m now convinced that ML is something big.

To sum up, probably with right amount of money and time - about 1-3 months you can make decent speech to text software at home that will work good with your accent and native language.

I remember the first device I programmed on it... Ordisavant.

It used to be a classic question-answer machine (with multiplayer !), And ... Basic language!
I was so proud to make music with beeps, or a calculating machine, just for fun.
It was hard to read a program line by line, but it was so cool for me.

I was nearly 6 when my parents bought me this really great toy.

I wonder if anybody know it?

Last night my friend started messaging me to help her install windows 10 onto their computer. She said her and some idiot with less tech credibility then a rock tried everything they could think of. First they downloaded the windows 10 ISO from the site, good so far, then instead of burning to a disk or USB, they thought 'copy and paste' would be enough (no googling at all) obviously the image wasn't attatched correctly, so they say they spent an hour doing IDEK to get the disk to read before messaging me. I talk her through getting the ISO mounted and then it asks her for the product key, she got pissed at that and said 'They gave me the ISO for free why do I need to buy a product key'
this is why I despise my friends some days

Have you worked with GraphQL? Saw it for the first time and it looks like a pretty good tool for working with APIs, to me. I am excited to read your opinions about GraphQL.

Well, I am not sure whether this is supposed to be about worst experience as a reviewER or a reviewEE so I'ma do both. First as a reviewer.

So, on my first project in this company, I introduced automated build scripting (read: suggested, was "volunteered" to do it, then had to bust my ads to get it done). Prior to this, our process was run the thing in Visual Studio a bunch of times (don't ask) and package the resulting files. Well, new requirements made this not sustainable.

So after many many meetings in which I assured my co-workers that the script wouldn't cock up and go sideways and format our server (HOW???) and showed them how to work it AND added all the features they requested. I finally send the script out for code review. Oh the joy. Questions like: "why did you implement this?" Came from the guy who told me to implement it. "Can you change the formatting?" I checked and no. "Why isn't this to the code standard?" Because the code standard doesn't include scripting languages.

And here is the piece that takes the whole piss soaked shitsicle pie "I don't understand why we're doing this in the first place. We have a build process already, why do we need a new one?" FUCKING REALLY?!?!? YOU WERE IN THE GODS DAMNED MEETING WHERE WE DECIDED TO DO THIS!!! SET OUT THE REQUIREMENTS!!! LITERALLY EVERYTHING TO DO WITH THIS SCRIPT YOU WERE THERE AND YOU'RE ASKING WHY WE'RE DOING IT NOW!?!?! Fucking hell. I forced it through anyway because I had the higher ups all signed off on it, but seriously. Just because we're doing something new that slightly inconveniences you, doesn't mean it doesn't need to be done. Stop being afraid of change.

Side note: these people actually would regularly hold up process and product improvement because change is scary.

Erm not sure if this qualifies. Not so long ago I was tackled with having to read a device memory at a very high address in 32-bit linux process (kernel is 64). The 32-bit mmap is unfortunately limited to range of protected mode PAE so it just wouldnt reach that high. So! I wrote my own syscall in assembly that would switch to long mode first so I could use long registers and then I got my page and switched back :)
In retrospective not a big deal, but it made me really happy for the rest of the day when I saw that address in pmap :)

semi dev related(later half)
A common and random thought I have:

A lot of units that humans use are either needlessly arbitrary or based on something weird. Like Fahrenheit. That shit is weird! 0°F is the freezing point of a water and salt solution. What a weird fucking thing to use!

But also, I like Fahrenheit more. Probably because it's what I was raised with and switching is tedious (though I'm trying. I'd like to use metric more), but also because one degree F is a smaller, more precise change. You can describe more accuracy without decimals.

On the other hand I prefer metric for length. Centimeters, and centimeters are way more precise and way less confusing than inches and .... 1/8th inches? Who the fuck decided on 1/8ths?!

Which brings me to my common thought:

If you look at a Unix timestamp, you can approximate somewhat when it happened. Knowing the current timestamp and a few reference points you can see RELATIVELY what a epoch stamp translates to. A few days ago, an hr ago, 2014ish.

This leads me to think that if we actually taught from a young age to think in epoch as a unit (not as a replacement to normal date formats but as a secondary at first) that we could just naturally read epoch time in the same manner we read dates like "28/01/2006 14:24:10 UTC"

In your brain you automatically know how old you were when that timestamp happened. What grade/job and where you lived at the time. What season it was. You know how far into the day it was, a little before lunch (or after or whatever, your time zone will vary). Now try with 1138458250. I can usually get roughly the year, and month if I really think about it, but that's it. And it takes much more effort

I'm sure there's other units we could benefit from but epoch is the one that usually brings this to mind for me.

So people always complain about how people ask bad questions on StackOverflow, but it seems people on SO are also unable to properly read the question.

I literally stated in my question that I've tried using android's v7 SearchView and first thing someone answers is use the v7 SearchView, I mean c'mon, RTFQ