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Some empty-headed helpdesk girl skipped into our office yesterday afternoon, despite the big scary warning signs glued to the door.
"Hey, when I log in on my phone, the menu is looking weird"
"Uh... look at my beard"
"What"
"Just look at this beard!"
"Uh.... OK"
"Does this look like a perfectly groomed beard"
"Uh... it's pretty nice I guess"
"You don't have to lie"
She looks puzzled: "OK... maybe it could use a little trimming. Uh... a lot of trimming". "I still like it though" she adds, trying hard to be polite.
"I understand you just started working here. But the beard... the beard should make it clear. See the office opposite to this one?"
"Yeah"
"Perfectly groomed ginger beards. It's all stylish shawls and smiles and spinach smoothies. Those people are known as frontend developers, they care about pixels and menus. Now look at my beard. It is dark and wild, it has some gray stress hairs, and if you take a deep breath it smells like dust and cognac mixed with the tears caused by failed deploys. Nothing personal, but I don't give a fuck what a menu looks like on your phone."
She looked around, and noticed the other 2 tired looking guys with unshaven hobo chins. To her credit, she pointed at the woman in the corner: "What about her, she doesn't seem to have a beard"
Yulia, 1.9m long muscled database admin from Ukraine, lets out a heavy sigh. "I do not know you well enough yet to show you where I grow my unkempt graying hairs... . Now get lost divchyna."
Helpdesk girl leaves the scene.
Joanna, machine learning dev, walks in: "I saw a confused blonde lost in the hallway, did you give her the beard speech?"
"Yeah" -- couldn't hold back a giggle -- "haha now she'll come to you"
Joanna: "No I already took care of it"
"How?"
"She started about some stupid menu, so I just told her to smell my cup". Joanna, functional alcoholic, is holding her 4pm Irish coffee. "I think this living up to our stereotype tactic is working, because the girl laughed and nodded like she understood, and ran off to the design department"
Me: "I do miss shaving though"68 -
I got my wife pregnant despite birth control being used... You could say she *puts on sunglasses* failed the penetration test.
I'll see myself out.14 -
A rare bug appeared. It was my duty to finish it.
SH = Manager
SH: So when do you think you can finish the task?
Me: I still have to analyze the problem. Give me a moment and I'll get back to you.
SH: Alright.
*An hour later*
SH: *Approaches my desk* Have you found the source of the problem?
Me: Not yet. Please give me some more time.
SH: Ok.
*An hour later*
SH: *the approach* You found it yet?
Me: Yes, I've found the the source of the problem, But... *explains the problem and thus concluding that it's a complicated bug*
SH: Can you finish it by tomorrow?
Me: I'll do the best I can but I am not entirely sure if I can finish it by tomorrow.
SH: OK great!
*The next day*
SH: *Le approach* Hey I have a colleague here that may be able to solve the problem, he has skills with XYZ. Ok, I will leave you two at it then. *the leave*
Helper: So can you tell me about the issue here?
Me: *explains the bug and the source of the problem*
Helper: Have you tried solution A?
Me: Yes sir, but it yields a different output... *explains what happened with solution A*
Helper: Well, that won't work. What about solution B?
Me: I've tried that, too. *Another lengthy explanation*
Helper: Welp, ok. I'll get back to you on that.
(...But he never came.)
*A few hours later*
SH: *A.P.P.R.O.A.C.H.* Hey I have this team lead from another department. I think he can help you out on this one. *L.E.A.V.E.*
Helper 2: What seems to be the problem?
Me: *Explains again with all the solutions I tried but failed*
Helper 2: Wow. That really seems to be a complicated problem.
~~
Me (In my head): -_-
~~
Helper 2: Listen, I need to get back to my team. I'll keep you posted if I happen to find a solution for your problem alright?
Me: Alright thanks.
*Towards the end of the day*
SH: *APPROACHHHH* Have you resolved the bug yet?
~~
Me (In my head): You made me spend half the FUCKING day explaining to these people who didn't even give a piece of FUCKING SHIT to contribute to the problem and you are asking me if I am done with this FUCKING BUG? FUCK YOU, YOU SON OF A -
~~
Me: No, it is not finished yet..
SH: You have to finish this because we don't have tomorrow.
~~
Me (In my head): SHDIFHWISGSIFGSISBAUDBEIQBDIWGFIEBWIDHWIQBDOSBCISBDOSHDIAGSUSVDIFBDKDJWIQKDBDIDGSUWVDIABDIXBSIDBDIDBWUWGUSVDUWVDJQBDUDVWISHDUWVFG
~~
I went home for the day.21 -
When I finished my studies, I was looking for a job and had an interview at a smallish company.
Boss: can you do C?
Me: yes, I have already done some stuff in C.
Boss: I mean, are you really good in C?
Me, growing suspicious: well yes I already have been using it - but anyway, there's also the project documentation for looking up, right?
Boss: uhm, the code IS the documentation.
I envisioned myself being drowned in undocumented spaghetti code and wasn't really keen on that job anymore, but my following question pretty much ended the interview:
Me: oh, I see. Do you have any roadmap for getting your development to a more professional base?
His looks, priceless! He was just shocked when he realised that he had failed my interview, and that I was a fresher made it even harder to digest for him.30 -
When CS professors are lazy to grade so they think they can just give you any grade without you questioning them...
Me: Hi Professor, I see I got a 94 out of 100 on my 2nd project. Your comments said, some of my functions didn't pass your junit test cases.
Prof: Yes!
Me: How come? I tested it several times before submitting and they all passed the test cases. You gave us the test cases to write the code for.
Prof: Yeah, but some of your functions aren't passing on mine.
Me: Since I'm in your office, can you please run it again so I can see?
Prof: Are you doubting me? I gave you the project and I'm telling you they're not passing my test cases.
Me: I just want to make sure because I did work really hard on this project to pass all the test cases. *Runs the code to show him on my laptop and they all pass*
Prof: Fine, let's run it together on mine again. *He runs it and they all pass on his laptop*..hmm, that's weird. They didn't pass when I ran them. Maybe, because of the IDE I used earlier.
Well, looks like you get your 100.
Me: Thank you but which IDE did you ran it in that failed? Just wondering..🤔
Prof: Doesn't matter now...they're passing. Just be ready for your next project...you guys will be writing the test cases yourself this time..9 -
I'm not an iOS expert, I just wanted to get Google ads on my iOS app so that I could make a few petty dollars at the expense of my users. Is that too much to ask?
I started by following Google's instructions: install cocoapods, copy and paste some swift code... Compile failed, app broke. Carefully retrace my steps. Nothing.
Stackoverflow (praise be with them) suggests upgrading Xcode. Go to app store and click to upgrade Xcode. No progress bar, no status updates, just that pissy little spinner for several minutes. I become impatient try a few more times. It ain't happening.
Stackoverflow (holy of holies, defender of the weak) points me to an alternate source for Xcode, on the app store dev console. 4GB and some time later, an attempt to unzip gives "unknown error". Genocide of sorts.
Stackoverflow (all that is pure, all that is kind, all... I think you get it) says upgrade your OS. I tried months ago but I had issues with that pissy little spinner. Persist. 5GB and a "heavy-year" of time later (sorry), it installs. Then Xcode installs. Then bar a few errors, the app compiles.
So after almost 24 hours, life resumes. The lesson.. respond to all obscure iOS errors by upgrading. If fully upgraded, calmly acquire a baseball bat and destroy your machine. Make sure you have a good book nearby in case of either event.
Thank you for reading my rant. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to pay Apple
$150 so that I may list my app in the app store.11 -
girlfriend: beb will you marry me in future?
me: let me find out
from __future__ import wife
Failed to get python-future
ImportError: No module named 'future'
me: beb, there is an error, it looks like i don't have a future. am sorry8 -
The moment when you're failing the university, you desperately wish to drop out of it and your parents push you to inhuman amounts of things to get you to finish the bloody thing when not even a bachelor's degree will ever help you in anything and it seriously wasted 5 years of "studying" about things in food technology that were there in the USSR. I think you failed to notice that 26 years have gone after that. More years than my age is, basically, and the tech has moved forward so much I will never be able to utilise at least 80% of what I was "taught". Yeah, it's nice pretending you're somehow smarter than everyone else in your room when you have a degree like that, right?
I'm studying at a professional college right now and it's 11 AM to 5 PM five days of the week. How am I supposed to be able to combine a university that never helps one even fucking slightly if you have a job or something similar? And it also insists that it won't take away grades if you don't go there, but simultaneously it actually does that. I'm the type who cannot be made to do something in some cases even if there is no other way perceivable.
I just want to get a goddamn job that pays, but I need something that gives me salary of at least about 1000 USD equivalent to just be able to hopefully rent a small flat and have some money to spare.
Now I have to be going to the college. I might end up getting my PC taken away from me a THIRD time since me and my friends built it. And it's only been a bit more than a year since that :|
Did I tell you my age? 23.
And these people(my parents), think they can bitch, moan, take things away from me(the things that helped me all my life to not go insane from their actions), then scream at and even hit me if I don't act 100% the way they want me to.
AND THEY WILL SAY THEY WANT ME TO SUCCEED AND THAT THEY STAND FOR MY FREEDOM.
If there is some force that can help me out of this, I summon thee!
/endrant.
Sorry for that. I needed to have that out of my system.34 -
Never let anyone make you believe that just because you don't have a specific skill which is 'required' for your dream job/a job you really want, you won't be able to reach it.
I've heard countless times that I could never do anything with programming/linux (server) engineering because I'm freaking bad at maths. They always said it was a requirement to understand it in order to become good at those two things.
Except for a few simple tests with 'okay' marks, I never got a good grade for it and failed it entirely at every school.
Guess who's a programmer (free time) and a professional linuxer right now!
It just pisses me off when people tell someone that because they don't possess a skill, they won't be able to make it to what they would love to do.14 -
Just sharing my experience of my spontaneous interview with Facebook. I'm not good at writing these but here you go :)
- I was working as an Android dev and didn't have much knowledge in algorithms nor competitive programming, never ever interviewed with big companies.
- a random day on LinkedIn, a recruiter from Facebook contacted me
- I ignored it for few week because I thought it's so out of my league, then somehow, out of blue, I had a thought of giving it a try, so I did
- passed first round
- start studying algorithms a little for phone interview in 3 weeks
- recklessly took the phone interview
- passed
- start studying intensively (while working fulltime) for the on-site interview in 2 months
- almost got the job, they gave me one more chance by a followed up interview
- messed up the last chance real bad
- failed!!!
- Initially I just wanted to give it a try, but the fact that I failed at very very last chance, frankly, bothers me a bit. Maybe I will interview with FB or big companies if I have chance later, but I know for sure that the studying had made me a much better dev. All the code I write now is much more efficient (I think), I can and not anymore afraid of reading complicated code.
- Overall, it does takes a lot of time (~4 months studying while working fulltime), but also benefits myself a lot though I didn't get the job, so basically, good experience, but better if I got the job 😁
Oops, wanted to write a few lines and it's a long post already.. I should stop here :D9 -
Back when I was in college I had this CS professor who was by far the worst I can remember. The class was some bullshit 100 level required intro to CS course, and the guy tried to make it as difficult as possible. Beyond that, he was just a bad professor and did stupid things.
One of the most memorable things he did was give homework assignments, and then in order to collect them (it was a lecture class of about 150 people), he would have everyone pass their printed assignments to the right, and these sheets of paper traveled all the way across the lecture hall in every row of seats. It was a complete mess.
As you can probably guess, he frequently misplaced homework assignments, and many were probably lost through this ridiculous method of turning them in. Some people almost failed this ridiculously easy class because he lost their homework assignments. I think he lost like one of mine so it didn't matter much, but some other people in the class almost failed because of this. I think in the end he had to make a lot of exceptions because of this obvious trend.
Beyond that, he was an older guy who had worked for IBM, and he made that known at least once per class, usually more. "IBM this, IBM that!" So fucking annoying.
I'm glad to be long done with college.6 -
I worked at a place where the help desk guys did the good ol' "I'll send an email from your laptop if you walk away without locking it and tell everyone lunch is on you" routine. After it happened to me about 3 times I was like, "I gotta get this help desk prick back!" So after several failed attempts at walking by his pc when he walked away it instantly hit me how I can punk him back.....SO, I logged onto SQL Server, clicked open a new query window and typed up a dbmail command and on the @from parameter I set it to the help desk guy's email address. His face was PRICELESS when I was shooting off emails to the entire IT dept on behalf of him WHILE he was sitting in front of his PC. Lesson is: don't fuck with dev help desk dude! 😎😜2
-
Sister comes into my room
"Can you look at moms laptop, it stopped working I'm scared I broke it"
Ask why
"Idk it just stopped working, all I did was install adobe flash player I dont think that could do it could it?"
Top kek
Take a look
"EFI IPV4 0 (error code) failed to boot"
Weird. Enter bios
"Hard drive: [Not detected]"
Well, that's no bueno
Pop open back, hard drive is loose
Pfft, push that fucker back in
Boot -> works
"Mom is going to kill me I broke it im so worried" -> relieved laughter
Adobeflashplayerkilledmyharddrive.jpg
Shook.exe14 -
"years of experience" basically means nothing, both for people and organisations. You can work with someone who has 30 years experience who knows nothing, and someone with 1-2 years who's practically an expert.
Joined a large multi-national fresh out of college, that had been around for +90 years. I expected them to know software development inside and out. Didn't expect to see so many failed projects for stupid reasons, so many over sights, so many .... morons, to be honest.
Worked for a startup company where most only had 1 or 2 years more experience than me and learned so much.
Worked for a small company where everyone had 1.5 - 2 times my experience, where I learned the meaning of "bewilderment".
Never feel small, or less valuable because of a number. Theres a good chance you are working with jackasses - practiseSafeHex7 -
My favorite kind of interview question/challenge is anything that is highly practical for the job. At the current company I work, the coding test/interview challenge was to design and implement an API very similar to the core functionality of the actual product. It’s fair, tests for skills relevant to the job, and is much better than irrelevant silly brain teasers and cs questions, I feel.
In terms of specific questions, one of my favorites is one that one of my colleagues suggested I ask to potential candidates: describe what you think your biggest failed project/task was in your engineering career, and what happened/what you learned. I think it’s a good reflective question that can tell a lot about someone.3 -
Today I felt sorry for my boss.
Story behind it:
My boss always encourages me to do the right thing. One of those right things is to enforce quality gates in our build pipelines which, as many of you know, means that the build fails if certain quality parameters are not met. Now an external vendor team merged the code this past thursday for a large feature that they had been working on and our build failed majestically throwing out the statistics and the offending files and lines of code.
All hell broke loose and there were escalations and what not and people working extra hours and over the weekend to try and get it right. So, I get a call from my boss earlier today to explain to me how important it is to release the feature and how it's going to be very bad if we don't. He was trying to justify his ask which was to lower the quality criteria and let the build pass for this week. Of course the dev in me was furious but then I realized it's not him but the corporate culture. Why would he or anyone would risk losing their jobs over the quality of code?
If you work at a place where IT is a support function of the company's primary business, I understand the moral compromises you guys have to make sometimes to keep the ball rolling. Thank you for your effort to make the world a better place.
So, thank you boss for all your support. I know it's not always up to you to decide on things but keep up the good work.4 -
Sometimes I wish I was allowed to just strangle my colleagues...
Example from the 'code base':
try:
do_something()
except Exception as e:
log(e)
do_something()
When I asked why they would redo the same call right after it failed I was told that 'It works the second time because it takes time to raise the Exception '.
Bitch, you've got a race condition in your sensitive banking software. You know it's there. Do you really want to trust the time needed to raise your exception will always be enough to synch that dumpster fire you call code?
Show some fucking respect for your craft and fix that shit. But of course they won't, because it will work flawlessly until it suddenly stops working. Taking down who knows what in this damn, undocumenred monolith with it....
Sometimes I'm honestly afraid to trust banks with my money.7 -
My friend: My laptop is not working. Can you please fix it?
Me: Ok. I will take a look at it.
*After 1 hours*
Me: I think your hard disk has failed.
My friend: Can't you fix it? You always spend day and night on your computer. So, I think you can fix it.
Me: Sorry. I can't.
*Next day I went to his home*
His brother to my friend: You said he is a genious. He can fix anything related to computer. He can't do anything. I will take it to a best repair shop in the area.
Me: *walks out of his home*11 -
My first software teacher almost made me quit programming for life.
She spent the entire year not showing us how to make a shity app in visual basic. Zero help. We all hated it.
At the end of the year and she realised she had 'forgotten' to teach us 70% of the course. We all failed miserably! I didn't touch programming for almost 3 years. (unless you could MATLAB, which I don't).
That was when I discovered Mehran Sahami's CS106A course on the Stanford website. Honestly the best teacher I've never met! His passion is boundless and mastery of teaching is second to none. Thanks to him I discovered programming and I love it! Karol the robot should get a special mention too!
Good teachers make the world of difference.6 -
Designer: Need to file a bug, I'm not getting an option to login with FaceID
Me: Oh weird bug. Is it setup on the phone you are testing with?
Designer: yes, use it in all other apps
Me: Did you get an error during onboarding on the FaceID screen?
Designer: nope no error
Me: ..... hhhmm, can you show me your settings?
Me: ... eh, says you have FaceID disabled for this app ... did you click "No" to FaceID during onboarding?
Designer: Yes, to test edge cases
Me: ................ ok ........ if you setup the app and told it to not allow FaceID to login ......... you won't get the ability to use FaceID to login .......... like .... by design .... on purpose ...... cause .... you told it to do that
Designer: No no, it needs to have a setting on the login screen to allow me to turn that back on incase I forget my passcode
Me: the fuck it does. Yeah we can't have anything on the login page that says, without authorization, change my settings
*Deep breath*
Me: Remember we had this conversation previously, where you didn't want the user to create a passcode during onboarding as it was too much friction, and wanted to do FaceID only. With your backup plan being to allow the user to create a NEW passcode on the login screen if FaceID failed .... remember that discussion we had about security? ... and how its important? ... and that we like having any? Ok so its the same reason as that, just with a different setting this time
Designer: ... hhmm i'm not sure I like this
Me: ... tough luck then, not happening
Me: oh and btw, remember we had that other talk about reproduction steps for bugs? Like when the app crashed and you told me it was because its in light mode, and nothing else at all? So disabling FaceID, is very relevant info to the problem of "I can't login with FaceID", please tell me these things first11 -
1. You don't code to add a feature or whatever. You do it to solve Users' problems. It's a User-centric system.
2. You read more code than you write. So help yourself and write code intended to be read.
3. If people don't know you did something, you did nothing!
4. Never answer a call at 3 am if you're not paid to be on night call-duty. You'll become the guy who answers at 3 am.
5. Remember the big difference between you and me is that I failed to do stuff more times than you have tried to do.
6. When you start shaving the yak, stop!10 -
I get a call: "Hey the site is down. Fix it!"
Worked on my workstation, not on my phone => DNS issue.
Local cache: "All OK"
ISP's DNS: "No record"
Google DNS: "Server error"
MXToolbox: "All OK"
CloudFlare DNS: "Domain? What domain?"
After a day of fucking around with configs and wanting to strangle the customer support guy, I just started pressing buttons, until suddenly, it worked. Turns out I'd accidentally enabled DNSSEC on a domain, that wasn't configured for it.
Lesson learned: There is no official DNS error code for "DNSSEC failed somewhere upstream". If you're lucky, you might get something useful out of the authoritative server, but apparently not on Mondays.8 -
Dear diary,
Today is day 3 of Windows 11 for me, and after about an hour of gaming, everything got laggy. I thought it was an AV scanner taking its sweet time kind of lag, but then.... I couldn't switch back to the desktop, I couldn't launch the task manager, it was just a solid frozen brick, and then when I unpaused this game to go back into it.... it was frozen too.
So here I am , with a frozen machine, so I give up and attempt a hard reboot........ yep, your fucked too. Windows auto repair kicks in, and it freezes too.
So now I'm here, with a brick of a fucking machine, wondering wtf could have gone so wrong.
Finally, I've made it to the failed boot screen,
> bootrec /fixboot
permission denied.
🤔 dafuq you smoking?
Fine
> sfc /scannow
Permission denied
Ok.... I don't think I want to know how this works.
> chkdsk /f /r /x C:
Yay something fucking runs
.
.
.
no issues 🤨
Fuck it, reboot.
Oh, now you want to fucking boot you piece of shit.
Now to understand how the fuck you can get a permission denied when your running CMD before boot 😐18 -
Dev: “Ughh..look at this –bleep- code! When I execute the service call, it returns null, but the service received a database error.”
Me: “Yea, that service was written during a time when the mentality was ‘Why return a service error if the client can’t do anything about it?’”
Dev: “I would say that’s a misunderstanding of that philosophy.”
Me: “I would say it’s a perfectly executed example of a deeply flawed philosophy.”
Dev: “No, the service should just return something that tells the client the operation failed.”
Me: “They did. It was supposed to return a valid result, and the developer indicated a null response means the operation failed. How you deal with the null response is up to you.”
Dev: “That is stupid. How am I supposed to know a null response means the operation failed?”
Me: “OK, how did you know the operation failed?”
Dev: “I had to look at the service error logs.”
Me: “Bingo.”
Dev: “This whole service is just a –bleep-ing mess. There are so many things that can go wrong and the only thing the service returns is null when the service raises an exception.”
Me: “OK, what should the service return?”
Dev: ”I don’t know. Error 500 would be nice.”
Me: “Would you know what to do with error 500?”
Dev: ”Yea, I would look at the error log”
Me: “Just like you did when the service returned null?”
<couple of seconds of silence>
Dev: “I don’t know, it’s a –bleep-ing mess.”
Me: “You’re in the code, change it.”
Dev: “Ooohhh no, not me. The whole thing will have to be re-written. It should have been done correctly the first time. If we had time to do code reviews, I would have caught this –bleep- before the service was deployed.”
Me: “Um, you did.”
<a shocked look from Dev>
Dev: “What…no, I’ve never seen this code.”
Me: “I sat next to Chuck when you were telling him he needed to change the service to return null if an exception was raised. I remember you telling him specifically to pop-up an error dialog ‘Service request failed’ to the user when the service returned null.”
Dev: “I don’t remember any of that.”
Me: “Well, Chuck did. He even put it in the check-in comments. See…”
<check in comments stated Dev’s code review and dictated the service return null on exceptions>
Dev: “Hmm…I guess I did. –bleep- are you a –bleep-ing elephant? You –bleep-ing remember everything.”
<what I wanted to say>
No, I don’t remember everything, but I remember all the drive-by <bleep>-ed up coding philosophies you tried to push to the interns and we’re now having all kinds of problems I spend waaaaay too much time fixing.
<what I said, and lied a little bit>
Me: “No, I was helping Nancy last week troubleshoot the client application last week with the pop-up error. Since the service returned a null, she didn’t know where to begin to look for the actual error.”
Dev: “Oh.”1 -
I have come to the conclusion that certain people have a tech aura that can fix or break things just by being near them. Apparently I can do both. Have you had a similar experience?
The other day a colleague was trying to play a YouTube video for the class (I work in a primary school) and the page refused to load. After 20m of failed page refreshes they called me. I walked in, sat next to the computer, and before I even touched anything YouTube suddenly appeared on the screen like it was trolling us the whole time. Much to the amazement of the class of kids who bow think I am some kind of tech-witch.
On the flipside - Linux hates me. It always has. Some years ago I decided to force myself upon Linux so I got a friend to install a dual boot on my machine. Knowing the effect I seem to have on Linux he demanded I stay out of the room until he was done. Two hours later and some stability testing later he called me back in to introduce me to my new setup. The moment I walked into the room Linux kernel panicked and never booted again.
If only I could learn to control this mystical power over technological life and death!13 -
Product Owner: "Our definition of done is putting it on production. So you are only done if it's on production. Otherwise our sprint goal is failed."
So we put it on production.
After deploy, some content manager appears: "Why is the system doing things? I was told this should not happen today."
"Erm, we have put the feature on production as we are only done if it's on production."
"Well, yes. But it should not be live yet!"
Oh well. Communication, or the lack thereof, does never fail to amaze me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
So this is going to be one hell of a FUCKING rant.
Just heard from a friend (doing the same exams I passed, it was going to happen in two groups and he was in the second) that he failed the first out of three phases. And why?
I NEARLY FUCKING FAILED THE FIRST FUCKING PHASE. I GOT A FAIR CHANCE TO MAKE IT RIGHT AND I TOOK THAT CHANCE.
BUT.
MY FRIEND MADE THE SAME MISTAKE. HE MISSED A FUCKING DOCUMENT AND ASKED FOR OVERTIME, WHICH HE GOT AND THEN HE ASKED THE EXAMINOR VERY NICELY IF HE COULD TELL HIM WHAT DOCUMENT HE MISSED (for the record, it was bad documentation and it was not clear that it had to be a seperate document) AND WHAT DID THAT FATHERFUCKING COCKSUCKER SAY?
Hmm hmm hmmm.... nope, that's your responsibillity
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? HE HELPED ME BUT NOT HIM? I KNOW YOU LIKE ME MORE THAN HIM BUT IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING REASON TO LET HIM FUCKING FAIL?!?!?!?
I AM MOTHERFUCKING FUCKITY FUCKING FURIOUS.9 -
Well, it happened!
After decades of waiting, it finally happened...
Very early on in my career, I was told that one day, one of your client will ask you to make the logo bigger.
Well, today was that day.
My client didn’t really understand just how much of a negative impact it would have on his site’s navigation by making his always obnoxiously larger ugly icon an additional 10% bigger.
He also failed to understand aspect ratio and forced me to stretch his low/res raster image without scaling it in all 2 dimensions.
He actually used the line from the infamous song “...I don’t want to tel you how to do your job by can you make the logo bigger?”
https://youtube.com/watch/...3 -
As a German developer living in Germany, I am used to write my code completely in English. In all of my former companies that was also the norm. In one company, we even talked completely in English with each other to a point where even if only German people where in a room, they would default to English at one point in a conversation because it became second nature to us.
(That company was very international and we had a lot of people from all over the world working there.)
Now, I work at a new German company that focuses on the German market. And for some reason I failed to ask them:
Do you write your code in English?
Because that's the norm, isn't it!? I just assumed it to be the case.
Nope! This time it is a mess of German and English term intermixing in glorious abysmal ways I never thought possible.
Sometimes we translate terms, sometimes we don't. So you have to wrap your mind around collections of words that COULD mean the same thing unless they don't. Best case, you have two words for the same thing, but I've seen up to five words (or abbreviations) to describe one business entity. Madness.
And don't get me started on the plurals. In English, it's almost exclusively: add an `s`.
In German, the singular and plural can be the same (e.g. all nouns ending with `-er`) so tough luck determining if you are on an object or an array of objects. (Weak typing language in use does not help either but that's an entirely different rant.)25 -
Client: Half of our barcodes aren't being recognized. Can you tell why?
Me: Ok, I will look at the problem... Open the imagens of the failed barcodes and see that all of them have a stamp over the barcode...
What I have done wrong to deserve this...3 -
Story time:
At a precious employer.
Hire shit-hot contractor.
No technical test at interview stage because he’s so shit-hot.
Is a uni lecturer.
PhD in mathematics.
Me: Shit, this guy must be good!
6 months later and a tragedy of errors and clearly misspent company funds later:
Manager: can you look at what x did and merge it into the product?
Me: Sure. *looks* *yells fuck very loudly*
*walks over to manager*
“Soooo... you know those 6 months and thousands and thousands you spent? It’s all for nought. There’s barely anything there, and none of it works.”
Manager: “Shit. What are we going to do? Can you fix it?”
Me: “To be honest, it would be quicker to just do it from scratch than try to work out what he’s done and failed to do.”
Manager: “Fuck. Ok. Go for it.”
I then had to build this entire new lot of systems, a workflow system, a user management and permissions system.
I got it done inside a month or so.
For context, we (the devs) knew something was afoot when the contractor couldn’t work out why his keyboard wasn’t working (it wasn’t plugged in), and he also *really* struggled to find his way around visual studio and git.
The moral of this tale? *always always* screen your candidates. Even if they seem amazing on paper.15 -
What's the point of using a framework if you don't use any of its features!? What the heck, I have to fix this damn web frontend that is so broken in many ways.
Instead of using an authentication middleware, every single view has the same block of code to check if a user is authenticated. Instead of templates, they used static HTML/JavaScript files and they passed data to pages through cookies.
The "REST" API is so messed up, nothing is resource-oriented, HTTP methods are chosen randomly as well as status codes. They are returning "412 Precondition Failed" instead of a plain simple "401 Unauthorized" when you're not authenticated! What the hell, did they even bother to check what 412 is about when they copied and pasted it from a crappy website!? I would never come up with 412, not even in my scariest nightmare.
What kind of drugs were they using when they wrote such code? Oh dear, I need a vacation...2 -
At university. But at first I thought I was too stupid because everyone in my class sounded like they started hacking the NSA at age 3, and I hadn't even opened a command line. Even had a proffessor tell me if I didn't ace his OOP class, I should quit (I failed, did good the second time though). Moral of the story is: fuck him, and anyone who tells you that you can't do something.4
-
Devs online be like "I started learning to code when I was 2 years old and submitted my first application at 5, since then I've made a few simple apps and pull in 2 million a day, not much but it pays the bills"
So discouraging to come up with a novel idea for a simple product and spend a lot of time just to realize you're absolutely lost and severely lack the knowledge to even produce a working product of any sort. All the while some kid makes something "simple" 10x more complex than what you failed to do, and in like a day nonetheless.
How do people just pick up so much knowledge so quickly? How do they just figure out information they couldn't have possibly known like it's intuition?
Life is hard man.14 -
Senior colleagues insisting on ALWAYS returning HTTP status 200 and sticking any error codes in the contained JSON response instead of using 4×× or 5×× statuses.
Bad input? Failed connections? Missing authorization? Doesn't matter, you get an OK. Wanna know if the request actually succeeded? Fuck you, parse potential kilobytes of JSON to get to the error code!
Am I the asshole or is that defeating the purpose of a status code?!14 -
Ok, I'm adding devrant.com, reddit.com and youtube.com to my hosts file for the next weeks
Damn procrastination
PS: If I answer or ++ any of your comments, it means I failed. You devs can hold me accountable for that, thank you!4 -
You know what I hate? Websites that run so much scripted internet-connected shit in the background that you'll either get a fat error message or even a "failed to load site" screen from the browser if you lose the connection for a few seconds.
What's the motherfucking point of a website when its requirements make it effectively a livestreaming service, despite the content being less dynamic than Zuckerberg's face in US congress?
I don't give a shit whether I have internet when I'm fucking reading, you asshats. And you don't need to remind me when my internet connection is disrupted, I think I'll notice that by myself the next time I click on something and your garbage site will take more than the usual 5 seconds to fucking load the background color.9 -
During interviews about a month ago my friend and i saw an astonishing girl.we didn't knew her name but we had the interview list containg names of more than 1200 candidates which were selected. Fast forward today we started talking about that day and all of sudden we thought wouldn't it be fun if we used the interview list to find her on Facebook. Around 400 of the candidates were female. Instead of doing it manually i decided to write a python script.
Give script list of names
It will go to all the Facebook profiles which came up by performing a Facebook search though your fb account and take a screenshot of every profile
All of it is done through automations
At the end you just have to look at the screenshots manually
p.s. we failed to find her name. You've to trust me when i say we're not creep😂
28 -
Worst experience with a higher up?
At an old contract job (around 2013), I was contracted by the company to help guide their developers with me to rewrite their software (it was buggy as shit, they didn't know better.).
So, a month later, we are in the middle of the rewrite and the boss flies in pissed that it's not done yet, he had the audacity to accuse me of stealing contract work with no experience in the area.
I told him flat out, "you don't know what the hell you are talking about. If you didn't hire a JV coding team, you wouldn't need me to redirect your damn rewrite."
He fired me, so I went to his superior and told her the situation. She told me i completely deserved it.
Worse part was I got paid half of my contract. Didnt make that mistake again. 😒😒
Found out later that the company failed, declared bankruptcy. Felt pretty happy.2 -
# 3 weeks ago
customer informed us that the app will get quite some load since the beginning of July
# this monday
last spare hdd on database's SAN died.
I told everyone another hdd is to follow it very soon eithet whether nothing is done at all or if anyone attempts to touch the san array [cuz that's what redundant raids do...]. No fucks given by anyone, no attempts to have maintenance and planned outage within 24 hrs....
# this morning
another hdd has failed and now 1tb of data is lost. No way to restore backups cuz there is no database to restore them to....
# 20 minutes later I head out to get some popcorn. It's gonna be a fun week!
So... The planned heavy load [and revenue along with it] is not gonna happen... I guess they are gonna ha a week long outage.
That's what happens when you ignore warning shots fired at your face.2 -
Windows troubleshooting:
- Works on my system, therefore it's not an issue.
- Must be a hardware error.
- Obviously it's just cheap hardware.
- Have you tried turning it off and on again?
- Here's some obscure error code that leads nowhere.
- Have you tried "sfc /scannow"?
AS IF SFC IS A FUCKING SILVER BULLET!!!
- Our Indian support chap from answers.microsoft.com will help you.
RRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
Solution: quietly weep and reinstall your system.
Linux troubleshooting:
- There are good quality log files.
- You can run the program from the command-line and read both stdout and stderr from it.
- You can usually run the program with high verbosity options to help you track down the error.
- Even daemons can have their commands spawned from a dedicated shell, to see why they failed.
- Usually it's a configuration error and you can easily edit the configuration file.
- More often than not, the program will tell you why it failed.
Solution: usually easy to find.
I fucking love Windows. Because you know, it's so easy to troubleshoot and the support is so great!!!2 -
If I died, I would have one regret.
I once worked in a code base whose messiness would make an oil spill in the fucking pacific ocean look like spilled milk on the floor in comparison.
Naturally, it had bugs. Oh BOY did it have bugs. Most of them were taken care of well enough. Or about as well as anyone insane enough to work in that code could.
There was just this one bug, which I still (un)fondly call "my bug of 2 years". It. Just. Didn't. Make. Sense.
It was written in JavaScript. Naturally. Which by itself, is the metaphorical programming language equivalent of a pile of horse manure. But this bug. It was the guano icing on top of the horse manure cake which is JavaScript.
I LITERALLY spent 2 years trying to find a solution. I woke up at night, thinking of explanations. I had dreams about fixing the damn thing. And I never did.
On the day I left the job, I had to pass it on to a friend (who hasn't solved the fucker yet either).
I hated that bug with all my heart. But..
Now that I think back, all the books I read, all the docs that I scoured, every non working fix I coded and every failed efforts I made on it, eventually made me a better programmer.
So cherish your bugs and issues. Sometimes, they come, not to hurt you, but to help you grow (unless you use JS, those bugs just wanna fuck you).3 -
Fucking bruteforce man. Was supposed to go sleep when got few messages from my gameserver players that their accounts have been hacked.
Checked their logs, all of their accounts have been accessed from Russia. Told them to change their passwords and they told me their previous passwords which were easy af to guess.
Digged deeper and found hundreds of thousands failed logins in the last few hours and all of them from different ips.
Since I cant modify gamefiles on client side, the solution for now was to disable in-game registration and force player registration through the website form with captcha and also where each players login name gets appended with a random suffix chosen by player from a random list..
Fuck you bruteforce scriptkiddies, good luck guessing accounts now. At least I can sleep now.18 -
The Windows 11 keynote was such a load of bullshit. All the emo yadda yadda. You know, when I work on Windows, what I feel is irritation, anger, and despise for the amateur shitshow that Microsoft delivers.
In particular, but not limited to the fucking update reboots where Windows sits there uselessly and shells fucking prawns in its own ass!
Oh we now have semi-transparent shit. That's progress! It's so great! Only that it's not because already Windows Vista had Aero Glass, and Windows 8 removed it.
But we we have fucking rounded corners now! Crazy shit, some intern at Microsoft discovered border-radius, or did they dig out some fucking Windows XP copy? That also had rounded corners way before Apple even invented them!
To top it off, Microsoft even failed to deliver the livestream seamlessly and recommended watching it at Twitter. Yeah, that's the fucking "Windows experience" as we know it, you clowns!
My favourite BS quote from Nadella himself: "the web itself was born and grew up on Windows." That guy is so full of shit that an unmaintained latrine in rural India would be envious!8 -
Client: We want to onboard people with sign-up wizard just like (Massive Industry Leader) so remove the sign-up process from the app.
1 week of development later...
Client: We need to take photos of their information, but we think its easier to take photos on the phone so once they sign-up link then to the phone.
Me: How will they get the apps if it not in the app stores?
Client: Get the apps approved for the app store! duh!
2 weeks later... 4 failed app submissions..
Client: Would it be easier if we just add the sign-up on the app?
Me: Yes... like it was 3 weeks ago?
Client: Yes! Why did we remove it?
Me: You did in an effort to be more like (Major Industry Leader)
Client: ....but we're nothing like them! Change it back!
Me: >•<!!!
I have to fire my client...3 -
Met a student who has failed and appearing for re-exam.
Me: You need to work hard to get distinction (~85%).
He: Who wants distinction? I just need passing marks (35). Marks doesn't matter, knowledge does.
Me: Student who strives for more knowledge will surely get distinction.
He: 🤔8 -
My university has impeccable data management. I needed to ssh into their Linux server for an assignment but it refused to accept my login. Which was weird because I could login to the same account on one of our websites just fine. I typed my password into a text file and then copy and pasted it into both logins. The Linux one failed but the website succeeded. After some experimentation it turns out that the Linux server only recognized my username if I typed it in all lowercase, even though when I created the account it had uppercase characters as well.
So let me walk you through the sloppiness that had to have occurred for this to happen. When I first created the account it must have ignored what I entered and just saved the username in all lowercase without communicating that to me. Then the websites that use this account must either ignore case for usernames or lowercase the user input before querying the database. Finally, the Linux server, despite knowing that all the usernames are lowercase, is case sensitive and won't recognize the username as I originally typed it in.
Can you guess what department manages the account, website and Linux server? The Department of Computer and Information Science. Incredible.2 -
I have to rant a bit about the toxic reactions to a constructive Q&A website.
People keep complaining that they get downvotes and corrections, or stuff like that.
Are you fucking kidding me?
So you expect people to spend their own time for absolutely free, to help you, while you don't even want to invest in describing the issue you're having properly? And then complain that people are having issues in understanding your questions?
Let's look at this scientifically. Let's gather up some questions that have been received badly on SO in the last few hours. From the top (simply put https://stackoverflow.com/questions... in front of the id):
47619033 - person wants a discussion about an algorithm while not providing any information about what worked and what failed. "Please write a program for me". Breaking at least 2 rules.
47619027 - "check out my videos" spam
47619030 - "Here's the manual that has my answer but I can't find my answer in it".
47619004 - "how do I keep variables in memory"
47618997 - debug this exception, I'll give you no info on what I tried and failed. Screw this, you guys figure this out, I'm going out for beer.
47618993 - expects everyone to guess what the input is, what the expected output is, and whether he has read what HashMap is in the manual. But sure, this question is so far the best out of all the bad ones.
47618985 - please write code according to my specifications
Should I go on? There wasn't a single clear question about problems in code in this entire small set. Be free to continue searching, let me know if you find something that:
1. You understand what's being asked
2. Answer is clear and non-ambiguous (ex. NOT "which language is the coolest?")
3. Not asking someone to write a program for them.
4. Answer is not found in the most basic form of manuals (ex. php.net)
5. Is about programming.
The point is:
If you get downvoted on Stackoverflow - then you wrote a shitty question. Instead of coming over here and venting uselessly, simply address the concerns and at least TRY to write a clear question if you expect any answers.5 -
Linux gives you so much freedom, for example the freedom to fuck your system.
When i was experimenting with bootsticks i typed the following in the terminal:
sudo dd if=bootstick.iso of=/dev/sdb
Where is the mistake? The usb-stick was already plugged in at boot-time and since it was bootable linux mint named it /dev/sda.
You propably already realized it, i wrote the iso the my harddrive. My attempts to restore the partition-table failed, but luckily the kernel still had it in memory and i was able to backup my files via nautilus.
Still, i nearly had a heart attack11 -
Dev: My VM is not working. Something is wrong with VM.
Me: Have you made any changes to the code?
Dev: It shouldn't matter my VM is not working.
[I go and check the Dev's VM.]
Me: ಠ_ಠ The build output literally states your unit tests failed -
Hey there! I am pretty new but old to the community xD. Let me explain and introduce myself.
The post might be a little longer, depending on my inspiration, read it at your own risk ;)
I am here on devRant for almost a year now but, this is my first post. I wasn't active until a week ago or so. Why? Well, at the time, I didn't find posts interesting enough to keep me from work or school. I must addmit I was either stupid or confused (not uncommon for me).
Well, I am high school student who, when not prepearing for an entrance exam for faculty, is learning and doing indie game developent with my cousin's support.
Even though I was intermediate gamer whan I was younger, passionate but not addicted, I didn't even think about getting into game development until my cousin showed me one secific game and told me a story about it. Let's stop here and let me tell you why I tagged this rant with wk88.
I've already mentioned my cousin, he's my wk88 trouble. Why? I'll tell you only one thing. He studies CS at University of Cambridge, UK. He earned the scholarship by competing and earning multiple medals in programming in International Olympiad in Informatics. And here I am struggling with ******* trigonometric identities. But nvm, let's move on.
I told you about the game but didn't actually tell you the title and who developed it. So, my inspiration for getting into game development was Alexander Bruce , guy who designed Antichamber. If you haven't heard of it before/tried it yet, give it a shot, you probably won't be disappointed of you like fucking with your brain.
Here're some facts:
- Started learning programming at the age of 12, thought by my brother using Free Pascal in Lazarus.
- Have been learning C++ for 4 years and C# for 3, both at the same time.
- While learning these two, started building .NET based back-end and doing SQL stuff; failed to finish it, gave up after I realised I needed some advanced front-end skills, which I didn't want to learn, to implement a lot of things I wanted.
- Played a piano since I was 11 and been playing around with music production recently.
Here I am now, learning Blender and hoping that one day I will publish the game I've been developing for past year and a half.
Hope you didn't waste your time reading this. I will try to keep you up with things I experience durning future development.
Cheers! 🍻13 -
Can someone explain to me why the fuck I should even care about the fact, that some companies collect, use and sell my data? I'm not famous, I'm not a politician and I'm not a criminal, I think most of us aren't and won't ever be. We aren't important. So what is this whole bullshittery all about? I seriously don't get it and I find it somewhat weird that especially tech guys and IT "experts" in the media constantly just make up these overly creepy scenarios about big unsafe data collecting companies "stealing" your "private" information. Welcome to the internet, now get the fuck over it or just don't be online. It's your choice, not their's.
I honestly think, some of these "security" companies and "experts" are just making this whole thing bigger than it actually is, because it's a damn good selling point. You can tell people that your app is safe and they'll believe you and buy your shit app because they don't understand and don't care what "safe" or "unsafe" means in this context. They just want to be secure against these "evil monster" companies. The same companies, which you portrayed them as "evil" and "unfair" and "mean" and "unrepentant" for over a decade now.
Just stop it now. All your crappy new "secure" messenger apps have failed awesomely. Delete your life now, please. This isn't about net neutrality or safety on the internet. This is all about you, permanently exaggerating about security and permanently training people to be introverted paranoid egoistic shit people so that they buy your elitist bullshit software.
Sorry for my low english skills, but please stop to exist, thank you.64 -
After completing my sprint and some lingering stuff in the backlog
Me: Hey, there's this tiny feature people have really requested, I'll go build it since I got nothing else to do at the moment. It'll only take like 1h
PO: Hmm ok. Don't work on that yet, we need to check with business people and agree on the user stories and bla bla bla
Me: Ok, well there's these bugs I can take care of then, I'll get them fixed, won't be long.
PO: Hmmm, we need to measure the impact first. Let me get back to you on that a bit later
Me: Meh, oh. I'll refactor this bad component meanwhile then.
PO: Have you created a story for that in JIRA? Create the story first and then we'll groom it and take it in when we've time
Me in my head: Dafuq! Im trying to work on your fucking project but you keep throwing all that business bueraucracy shit at me. What am I supposed to do then? Sip coffee in the kitchen and talk about the other fucking billion failed "new business opportunities" with my peers? Fuck this circle jerk of a billion management people all trying to make themselves important. Nothing. Ever. Gets. Fucking. Done!!!
Me: Ah right, I'll do that *proceeds to the water cooler*5 -
Here’s one that has been the reason that I’ve not been on devRant for a while.
School counselor decides to come to me saying “Oh hey, it’s your last semester and at this rate you’re not gonna graduate bud” Why the duck couldn’t you tell me earlier?! Fine, fuck you, just give me FOUR extra online classes. ELA, Game Dev, Web Des, and Criminology. Alright, ELA and Game finished with no issue. Then comes Web.
This class is a complete piece of dog shit wrapped in HTML5 memorization hell. I don’t give a single fuck what a scrum is, or that this bitch doesn’t know how to ask her client if she can use their logo, the dumbass. How about you teach me more about actual STRUCTURE AND FUNCTION, HUH? MAYBE SOME EDUCATION THAT DOESN’T INVOLVE MEMORIZING ALL THE FUCKING HTML TAGS EVER?!
I am literally brute forcing my way through the tests. Failed? Open the lesson, close it, test reset and unlocked. Try again until you pass. Fuck this class in its miserably over complicated yet somehow over simplified existence.
Now I’m gonna go get some goddamn sleep. I’ve been at this shit for hours.6 -
"Hey, I've noticed that when I run this script, I get an error message. It says it has failed to do step x"
A: "Have you tried running it with sudo"
"Yeah, that works"
B: "NO WAY YOU SHOULD NEVER USE SUDO THAT'S A MAJOR SECURITY RISK, ARE YOU RETARDED RUNNING THINGS WITH SUDO IS EVIL"
"Do you have an alternative solution?"
*trjirp trjirp* 🦗🦗🦗6 -
I hate when manager wants an Android app supportable all the way to GinerBread .FUCK YOU ASSHOLE how about I tell you to work 24/7 .PM Shitholes doesn't know shit about coding and make some unrealistic promises and when things don't work this bastards are all over your ass and want you to fix things . How about asking a developer before making such unrealistic promises . Let me tell you PM are the most useless kind of people's in the world who has failed to prove their significance in the company. Fuck you....PMs9
-
I resigned yesterday to focus on my business full time. After 5 years and 1 previous failed attempt to leave the company, its finally done.
My boss threw his toys out of the pram and was borderline abusive about the whole thing. "it's like a kick in the balls" "you've clearly been planning this (said in an accusatory tone)" "you've said you were leaving before which is why you have 3 months notice now (to which my response was, and that is why I am giving you 3 months notice?!)"
Along with many other comments and general angry tone.
Honestly, I couldn't sleep the night before as I was so nervous. We're a small company and to some degree, a kind of family so I didn't want to break that. The more he spoke though, the easier it got. It simply cemented by decision to leave. They made no attempt to keep me. Showed no support. No gratitude for my 5 years of service. Nothing.
Well, you will be down your only dev in 3 months so good luck, I suspect you'll need it more than I will.19 -
> IHateForALiving: I have added markdown on the client! Now the sys admin can use markdown and it's going to be rendered as HTML
> Team leader: ok, I've seen you also included some pics of the tests you made. It's nice, there's no XSS vulnerabilities, now I want you to make sure you didn't introduce any SQL injection too. Post the results of the tests in the tickets, for everybody to see.
I've been trying to extract from him for 15 minutes how sending a text through a markdown renderer on the client is supposed to create a SQL injection on the server, I've been trying to extract from him how showing all of this to the world would improve our reputation.
I miserably failed, I don't know how the fuck am I supposed to test this thing and if I a colleague wasted time to make sure some client-side rendering didn't create a SQL injection I'd make sure to point and laugh at them every time they open their mouth.9 -
I once had to make a shitty canvas game as part of a marketing campaign when I worked for an agency, for fuck only knows what. You dragged a shopping trolley back and forth in an aisle, and got points for catching items that fell from the top.
The initial round of feedback had the complaint that sometimes players weren't receiving points for items. I spent a night playing this senseless game over and over, but I never failed to get the points for an item. I was pretty confident that it worked, it wasn't like the logic was complex, so I sent it over.
Second round of feedback had the same complaint. They were getting quite annoyed by it, said that it was a bad user experience. Again, I could not reproduce it at all: the game was an equally tedious waste of life on every device I tried it on.
In exasperation, I asked the sales guy whose pitch it had been to get me a video or a more detailed report. The client was quite arsey, as they saw it, at having to do bug-fixing for us, but they did agree.
Anyway, it transpired that they were angry that players were not receiving the points for the items they *failed* to catch. The way they saw it, the game wouldn't be fun if you were punished for not catching items - so they wanted the player to get ten points for every item on screen, regardless or not of whether they caught it in their trolley. Of course, I thought. Silly me.
I was actually quite impressed at how a marketing department could accidentally undermine the very notion of a game whilst seeking to make one more fun.8 -
TLDR: programming helped with my math weakness
I've always been bad at math. I always failed my math quizzes, and to be honest the only thing that I remember from that time was that I hated it, I didn't want anything to do with it, to hell with functions and formulas and all of that garbage.
Fast forward a couple of years. I just started my masters degree in machine learning and I'm sort of inclined to applications of deep learning in signal processing. Currently I'm writing a fourier transform in raw python and I've never had more fun. I feel like programming has helped me a lot with math, being able to see how each component behaves when you write a function helps a lot! Being able to plot things helps a lot! Not having to imagine mathematical functions as esoteric mystical wonders but being able to split them up into small components and seeing what you're doing wrong HELPS. A. LOT.
Just felt like sharing. I feel like programming has made me a generally smarter person, in regards to how I approach problems and think about stuff.4 -
Where I currently work (and have done for 10 years) we were recently recruiting for another dev, and one of the other devs and our line manager were running the interviews.
After 3 or 4 failed interviews they decided to test the questions on me... I got 3 out of 10 :(
My argument was (and still is) if I get stuck programming I can google, or you can teach me new stuff. And I can make a good cup of coffee2 -
Last week I was erasing a 2Gb USB thumb while copying some really important shit to my backup disk. I look at the terminal and see it's taking a lot of time to did zeroes on dev/sdb.
Then I realized that dev/sdb is the backups drive and I just erased the firsts sectors of my only fucking backup.
It's ok, I said, let's see what can TestDisk do for me. And it only could find an empty sad partition that had useless shit on it. Whdd couldn't even find the drive. Cat and dd vomited 160Gb of nothing to a file that couldn't be read. I was lost, because I failed doing something I'm really good at. And I did it because I was to stupid to check fstab...
It's the very first time I couldn't recover data, so I'm thinking about delete "Data recovery" from my resume skills and put "Data cleaning. Really effective. I can send you 160Gb of pure horse shit to prove it" instead.2 -
dear api author at my company pt. 2:
If you're gonna create an api method that takes some arguments.
And one of those arguments is an array.
THEN MAKE THE FUCKING ARGUMENT'S NAME PLURAL YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.
REPEAT WITH ME, MOTHERFUCKER.
ARRAY, PLURAL, NON-ARRAY, SINGULAR.
I need to pass a shitload of filters for the data for this table, and for every suckin fuckin filter I need to singularize this shit. Thank god for es6.
I know this sounds like nitpick, but I swear to fucking alpha omega this guy is inconsistent as fuck.
Every time it feels like he makes up a new rule.
Sometimes I need to send arrays of ids, other times arrays of objects with an id property on each.
He uses synonyms too, sometimes it's remove, other times erase.
PICK ONE MOTHERFUCKER.
If you can't do the basic things well, then what is to expect of more advanced stuff?
Naming conventions you fucking idiot, follow them. It's programming 101.
You're already sending them as plural in the fucking response. Why change them for the request?
And that's just style, conventions.
This idiot asshole also RARELY DOES ANY FUCKING CHECK ON THE ARGUMENTS.
"Oh, you sent a required argument as null? 500"
We get exceptions on sentry UP THE ASS thanks to this useless bone container.
YOU'RE SEEING THE EXCEPTIONS TOO!!!!! 500'S ARE BUGS YOU NEED TO FIX, YOU CUMCHUGGER
And sometimes he does send 400, you know what the messages usually are?
"Validation failed".
WHYYYYYY YOU GODDAMN APATHETIC TASTELESS FUCK???
WHAT EXACTLY CAUSED THE FUCKING VALIDATION TO FAIL????
EXCEPTIONS HAPPEN AND THANKS TO YOU I HAVE NO IDEA WHY.
The worst of all... the worst of fucking all is that everytime I make a suggestion to change shit, every time, you act like you care.
You act like the api is the way it is because you designed it in a calculated manner.
MOTHERFUCKER. IF A USER HAS ONLY PRODUCT A, THEN HE SHOULDN'T BE ABLE TO ACCESS DATA FOR PRODUCT B. IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO JUST RESTRICT SHIT WITH ADMIN ROLES. IDIOT!!!!!
This is the work of someone who has no passion for programming.10 -
Long time ago, back in a day of Microsoft Office 95 and 97, I was contracted to integrate a simple API for a payment service provider.
They've sent me the spec, I read it, it was simple enough: 1. payment OK, 2. payment FAILED. Few hours later the test environment was up and happy crediting and debiting fake accounts. Then came the push to prod.
I worked with two other guys, we shut down the servers, made a backup, connected new provider. All looked perfectly fine. First customers were paying, first shops were sending their products... Until two days later it turned out the money isn't coming through even though all we are getting from the API is "1" after "1"! I shut it off. We had 7 conference calls, 2 meetings, 3 days of trying and failing. Finally, by a mere luck, I found out what's what.
You see, Microsoft, when you invent your own file format, it's really nice to make it consistent between versions... So that the punctuation made in Microsoft Word 97 that was supposed to start from "0" didn't start from "1" when you open the file in Microsoft Word 95.
Also, if you're a moron who edits documentation in Microsoft Word, at least export it to a fucking PDF before sending out. Please. -
And so I have ranted earlier about how a panelist during my thesis defense told me that my algorithm is not an algorithm because it needs mathematical equations to be called an algorithm. I also told you guys that I facepalmed during the course of the interrogation.
Now I failed my thesis because I facepalmed. I quit school because of that but now I'm a better career person than him. I already started my freelance team and earning more than double his salary and he's still suck at being a low quality professor.7 -
Tonight, my long-time friend died. He was living in the basement for years, always reliable, always at my service, keeping my files, watching for my git repos, being my private cloud, and so many things more.
He wrote his last syslog entry at 0:21 a.m., passed away and never woke up.
I found him cold and motionless this afternoon, but could not do anything. Any attempt of reanimation failed.
Goodbye, little BananaPi, fare thee well, and if for ever.
I promise you, your legacy on SD card will live on with a new board.1 -
Everyday, I am amazed at developers like those here on devRant. I look up at you in awe and admiration, always thinking about how awesome your life probably is, even though you rant about it sometimes. I want to be like many of you in the future.
Thank you for improving our lives with whatever you are doing. I feel like this doesn't get said enough.
Meanwhile, University sucks (failed exams), but I am expected to graduate with good grades. Sigh. I also feel like I'm not learning enough of those things that I need to become a good dev and rather overly complicated math which I'll never need in my later life.24 -
Six years ago I quit my last full time dev job, moved to the big city, failed some startups, got job offer as a substitute teacher at the local high school, been doing that ever since.
Being a teacher and following a class over 2-3 years is like having a company with employees whom you have to teach everything, but if you teach them good they can become useful quite quickly.
This year I have taken on a "special" class where many have learning disabilities but some are literal geniouses.
Very hard to lecture about something that grabs all of their attentions.
So if you have any good tips that is more than welcome.
Also I kinda forgot about this app for many years but I remember we used to have a really good community here, so nice to be back here.
Looks like meat is back on the menu boooooois
9 -
Fucking Windows 10 entered an infinte reboot-BSOD-repeat loop after a failed upgrade... I JUST WANTED A FUCKING GAMENIGHT ON A SATURDAY YOU UTTER COCKSUCKING ABORTION8
-
Is there anybody who startet a startUp and failed? Not to be rude, but could you please explain, what you did wrong atd what I could do better?20
-
Boyfriend just got rejected after spending 45 minutes annotating a video using a company's shitty product they asked him to learn and utilize for the interview itself.
He did a fine job, if I do say so myself.
He was rejected today, with no reason other than a list of "common things that might have triggered a rejection".
Oh and the classic "we're sorry, we can't tell you why we rejected you - but we look forward to you re-applying in 45 days!"
Why the fuck not? If you're a recruiter and you do this shit, go royally fuck yourself. It's so beyond unprofessional and there's zero reason for it.
If he fucked up and failed, fine. At least tell him why. Be fucking adults. Your shit fucking stinks just like everyone else's, this isn't American Idol or the Hunger Games; you're not President Snow, and even Simon will tell you why you suck.
Fucking aggravating.15 -
I am so fucking done with all these incompetent fucktards!!! Why would you keep a client-brief in secret from your colleagues?! Why on your screwed delusional Earth you think it is perfectly okay if you don’t communicate the changes ahead your team? How could you - microbrained prehistoric dinosaur who petrified to your own semen - think that I can estimate with my time and do my work when you are barely able to think ahead 2 minutes without letting me know the actual scope and deadlines???!!! AND NO telling me the day before NOT GONNA MAKE IT VALID!!!! You failed in life you failed in evolution you played my trust and I don’t give horseshit about your career! Go fuck a hedgehog, eat it and shit out on the same fucking day. Tomorrow a new era starts and prepare yourself as I am hereby vow that I am not going to care any of your bullshit! I vow that every time you come to me with a new task, I will start it WHEN I can and do it between 9 and 17 and if anyone asks I will calmly tell the hard truth about the overbred, human shaped, evolutional dead end you are...5
-
8 years later, i have successfully failed my first company. Good experience but for now burnt out.
To fellow devs who are considering entrepreneurship , don't be afraid, try it until you are young. This month I will lay off my last employees, luckily with bonus and 3 months worth of salary, i wish them best of luck. Difficult to explain but I am as happy in the end as i was in the start, just older.12 -
I have had this job for 2 years - my first real job. It has been very very stressfull for the last 6 months and it feels like everything is falling apart in the company. It's a small work place with only 6 people in total.
A week ago my boss wanted a meeting and I got a feeling on what the subject may be. I was right about my thought. I was being fired because he feels like everything is falling apart mainly because of me. Though, I don't feel the same way, I think more it's the whole team that failed.
But the most weird part. I'm getting fired, I then have 3 months left, though, he says that I can in those 3 months show my value for the company, and if he thinks that I again have value, I can stay.
Who the hell fires an employee and right after says, you can stay if you prove your value? I don't really feel welcomed here anymore.
My motivation have drastically fallen the last week and I'm just sinking more and more. Maybe it's a good thing to get away and get a new job that values me and doesn't stress me the hell up.
I've been the only developer for over half the time here and I can feel that.
I just had to get out with this, so thanks for reading my small rant about my shitty life :)8 -
“Fullstack dev morphs into a security expert”
We have a simple user registration system. Get the user details, generate an OTP, save in Oracle, email the OTP. The SMTP host is configured to send emails only to people who have an existing @a_very_famous_bank.com email address.
As a part of an enhancement request, the other day, we were trying to register a non-bank email address. As expected, it failed.
Manager: Meeting... meeting... meeting
Me: (Explained the problem)
Fullstack dev: so the thing is.. it’s like.. (doesn’t falter to open with these lines)...what I can do is...I can send you an HTTP security header in the HTTP request. It’ll work!
Me: (I hope an adult giraffe fucks you in your belly button)
More to come!3 -
My apprentice is driving me nuts with his failed attempts on gold-plating.
The task "Get the data and export it to a file" becomes ""After many attempts to get the data via a different query than we worked out together I now finally got it and it makes sense if it was displayed but only one set of data at a time and it should also be selected what data should be exported and I have no idea how to do that so Cero, can you help me?".
Dang it dude, just show me for once that you can do 1 clearly decribed task, where you have many examples to work with, and NOT try to add any extras!
I am now working on how to tell him this in a nicer way...2 -
Boss: "So I'm taking the next week off. In the mean time, I added some stuff for you to do on Gitlab, we'd need you to pull this Docker image, run it, setup the minimal requirement and play with it until you understand what it does."
Me: "K boss, sounds fun!" (no irony here)
First day: Unable to login to the remote repository. Also, I was given a dude's name to contact if I had troubles, the dude didn't answer his email.
2nd day: The dude aswered! Also, I realized that I couldn't reach the repository because the ISP for whom I work blocks everything within specific ports, and the url I had to reach was ":5443". Yay. However, I still can't login to the repo nor pull the image, the connection gets closed.
3rd day (today): A colleague suggested that I removed myself off the ISP's network and use my 4G or something. And it worked! Finally!! Now all I need to do is to set that token they gave me, set a first user, a first password and... get a 400 HTTP response. Fuck. FUCK. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!
These fuckers display a 401 error, while returning a 400 error in the console log!! And the errors says what? "Request failed with status code 401" YES THANK YOU, THIS IS SO HELPFUL! Like fuck yea, I know exactly how t fix this, except that I don't because y'all fuckers don't give any detail on what could be the problem!
4th day (tomorrow): I'm gonna barbecue these sons of a bitch
(bottom note: the dude that answered is actually really cool, I won't barbecue him)5 -
Bless the service APIs that don't charge you for failed requests, that fucking on-site team almost cost my client 7k$, just because of a typo and an endless loop, that they pushed to production, while bypassing the rate and resource limit I set in place, because it "wasn't working" - it was working, you fucking cunts, it was preventing your system running wild for a reason.
-
"I don't have any issues with that (OS, code push, software, etc), so I'm not sure why you are having issues." I love reading comments like that, as if that solves the issue. The fuck does it matter if you don't have issues, they are having issues you moron. For a place for developers you'd think they'd be able to think logically, maybe they're in the wrong line of business. Maybe that software had an error parsing some file because some bit got flipped when writing to the HDD because there's an issue with the drive and the ECC failed for some reason, who cares. There's an issue and you saying it works for you makes you sound like a fucking moron... There's an error/crash, it happens, that's software.4
-
This happened with one of our senior profs during the first year of my college. I wouldn't call him a dev if my life depended on calling him a dev but regardless, I narrate the story here.
We were "taught" C++ by some really dumb professors during our first year of college and it was mandatory that everyone cleared the subject regardless of what field of engineering the students chose. Having already done 2 years of C++, it was quite a breeze for me. But during the final lab exam, one of my friends requested my help in solving the quite tough question (for those beginners). Thinking the exam and teaching was unfair, I stupidly wrote the answer on a piece of paper and passed it to him. One of our teachers, who had seen him ask me, was lying low waiting to catch me in the act and she swooped in and busted our asses kicking us out of the exam hall and sending us to the HoDs office like some prize from her war against academic corruption.
In the end, I failed the exam for cheating and had to redo (not only the exam but the entire lab course).
When I returned to college during the summer vacations to redo the course, I first met the antagonist of our story. Having a huge head that looked like a deformed watermelon and an ego the size of a building, he assaulted us first with a verbal diarrhoea of his achievements as a CS professor. I quickly realised that I was in a class of people who had failed to grasp how to make a program that printed "Hello World". To make things shorter, every question the prof gave us, I managed to solve in a mere matter of minutes, several better than his own solutions. Not having expected a student who knew his shit, he was determined to play me down. He hurled tougher question at me and I knocked them over his enormous head piercing his ego. He asked me such questions as how to reverse 1000 and get 0001 and wasn't satisfied with the several ways I gave because none of it were what he had in mind (which turned out to be storing them in a fucking array and printing them in reverse. That's printing not reversing you dung beetle). I kept my calm throughout but on the day of the final exam, he set quite a tough paper for a class of people who had already failed once. To his utter shock and dismay, I aced that too and I produced flawless code. This man who has an MTech from one of the most reputed colleges of my country then proceeded to tell me that he had to cut my marks because I had used more than one function when the question had asked for one function ( it never said only one). I lost my shit and pointed out that since I was the programmer, it was my wish how I coded. I also explained to him how repeating code is a bad practice and one should use functions to reduce redundancy and keep the code clean. Nevertheless, he lost his shit and he threatened me with consequences as apparently "I didn't know who I was messing with". I handed over the paper and stormed out of the class (though he called me back and tried to argue more with me. I apologized for losing my shit and left when he was done talking). I ended up getting a 'C'. Totally worth it.4 -
Project Leader is explaining to teammate how their UI will call my API and it'll run asynchronously in the background. UI guy asks: about error handling? I said the callback listener will be notified if anything goes wrong. I ask the PL, what next? just log and forget about it (that's my sarcasm)? How would anyone know this has failed?
PL says: good point and can worry about this later. Lets first focus on getting things to work.
You know later never comes. Well, except when the customer reports a problem. Its like every disaster movie you've ever seen before -
Howdy this is a daily reminder on why you can't trust anyone with shared information.
I am back home from uni for the holidays and like any computer person who is back in town became responsible for fixing every tech problem that has occurred since my last visit. But what caught my eye when I approached the family computer is not the problem with the computer itself, it's the paper in front of the computer that, in giant lettering, has not only the passwords and account names of my mom and brother's AOL (She's old ok) and FAFSA account respectively but also someone's social security number. Any goddam baffoon who looks through the window or is able to take literally three goddam steps past the front door now has enough information to commit identity theft or just take over one of their accounts. I know it's not that likely but I still had a heart attack when I saw that.
How badly have I failed them?1 -
If you are programming in C++ please always return a type from a function as the function prototype return type.
I had to debug some old code that failed to return a boolean on one of its flow paths. It would work on linux in release and debug, would work on windows in debug, and fail on windows in release.
The failure was NOT straightforward at ALL. It would return exit code 3. Then if I added a debug print to the function it would segfault.
Why the hell would popping something extra off the return/call stack not crash more readily? Wth is the point of debug compile if it won't catch shit like this?8 -
I will give you a reverse rejection. Went to two interviews on site with company. They asked me a question, and I struggled. Solved the question one hour after the interview :) asked me to come for a second hands on interview, make some changes to sample code. Did that reasonably well. I rejected them because in both times the engineers we're sitting behind their laptops and were working. 0 interest or engagement on their side about the candidate.
That startup failed some years after.1 -
This scene is an 8-year-old.
My friend(F) got his first mobile. First featured mobile.
Maximum smartness in that mobile was a snake game and Bluetooth.
So I decided to prank him.
M: Bro do you know this particular model need a network to use Bluetooth?
F: I am not stupid to believe you.
M: I can prove that.
F: K prove me, I will give you treat.
M: ok, turn on your Bluetooth paired it with my Bluetooth.
F: Ok
*start sending him the movie. We were on the train, a train was about to enter the tunnel*
M: When the train will enter a tunnel, We will lose network and sending will fail.
F: ok let's see.
*when a train enters in a tunnel, we shift light to black in meantime for 3-4 sec our eyes feel blindness. so I closed eyes before entering a tunnel and once train enter in the tunnel immediately restart Bluetooth *
M: look sending failed
F: Seriously man, I didn't know that.
M: It's ok bro next time inform me before buying any electronics.
F: sure
M: my treat?
F: Yup
*for next few days, he was thinking that Bluetooth need a network to send files until whole group laugh on him*4 -
I recently got into an interview where the interviewer made a huge mistake:
R: “what’s your resignation period?”
Me: “well, long story short I’m working on a contract so it’s actually short, just 1 month”
R: “mhhh could you make it 2 weeks somehow? We may really need to start sooner”
This is a sentence you shouldn’t say as a recruiter as now I know:
- You are desperate to find someone
- You have a time urgency
- You failed to find someone before
- You basically confirmed you want me in9 -
Every time I tell a more senior dev I need help, they tell me to try the obvious things, I tell them I tried those things already, and they think I must have just done it wrong. So they spend an hour explaining to me how to do something I literally just did, and then more time trying the exact same things I just tried. Nobody wins.
Except for me when I find the correct solution while they’re re-implementing the failed solutions because nobody trusted me.
Sadly, this happens all the time. “Did you try a and b?” “Yeah, no luck.” “Okay, so when you try a, you have to remember to call c and d. Let me explain...”
So much wasted time. But the silver lining is in getting to be the one who found the solution (until they wonder ‘why’d she even come to me anyway if she knew the answer?’ ... 🙄) Because I trusted you to know what “team” means, and it’s not too late to learn ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
Installs Ubuntu 16.04
Try to put my favorite software installed.
Reboot failed, drops to BusyBox shell.
Me thinking : I fucked up.
Friend walks by, couldn't read shit.
Friend: Look at his kid, he's trying to hack into someone's computer.
Me: (Agrees just for reputation) Yeah, damn teachers been giving me bad grades.
Friend: Could you help me too?
Me: (Don't have hacking experience, making shit up) NO, because your not my best friend. And school security is hard to crack.
Got away safely1 -
First day of the academic year(CS):
(some uni official) - "And remember to become a good programmer you have to become an excellent mathematician first"
(Me): Oh shit.
Little did I know...
It is a second year now. And the only course I failed is the one that he lectured.
I had no fucking idea that people like this (mad)man exist.
Almost at every lecture he was introducing at leas one topic that was way beyond our program; as he thought they were interesting and "fun".
Many teachers at the University refered to him as a very 'ambitious' man. Then I didn't blame him he truly loved his profession and wanted to share as much knowledge as possible(I thought).
But two months ago he went to far. It was a second exam(for those who failed the first one). And believe me there were a few(60 out of 160 to be exact).
Only ~30 people showed up as the rest failed to many courses and would be kicked out of the uni anyway.
He was handing out the exams when I saw that whoever gets one slowly starts turning white.
I finally got my copy and immediately I realized that the tasks are from his favorite topics, the "fun" ones. 🤦
At this point I knew that it will be extremely hard to pass. But when I was reevaluating my life choices something draw my attention.
One of the tasks had a note below it: "Homework after the exam: It is a very interesting problem just assume x instead of y and try to solve it. PS: it is a lot of fun!"
At this point I lost it.😠 I don't care how much you love math, you should always assume that not everyone loves it as much as you do. So don't push it down the throat of people who clearly don't need a degree in this subject!
Now I'm preparing for the second semester with this guy. And I have a strong feeling that it will be hell of a ride... again.😐
BTW: Sorry that the rant is so long, it's the first one I wrote, and had to share it with someone 😀18 -
The fact that I have to convert a 90s-ish design into a WordPress theme despite the boss trying to convince our client that WP's shit and we should do it in something else doesn't tilt me as much as it should.
But what DOES tilt me and piss me off is the fact that the shitheads told us to 'make the design better', and so I tried; I made one of their graphics responsive by only designing it with CSS (and for once, I even made it work right) because they wanted a mobile-friendly version but failed to supply a mobile-version PSD so I had to improvise and they had the balls to tell my boss that they're 'disappointed that we failed to follow the guidelines'.
Did you bitchsicles even bother to hire a proper fucking designer who would know how to fucking design a PSD to convert into HTML? There's no fucking grid, the design's all over the fucking place like your mother after a Viagra-fueled Friday night bukakke party at an old home and the colors are an eyesore like your own fucking selves if you ever bothered looking in the fucking mirror. Fuck you all to hell.1 -
Full stack developer.
I know what it's supposed to mean, but I feel like it gives discredit to the devs who perfect their area (frontend, backend, db, infrastructure). It's, to me, like calling myself a chef because I can cook dinner..
The depth, analysis and customization of the domain to shape an api to a website is never appreciated. The finicle tweaks on the frontend to make those final touches. Then comes a brat who say they are full stack, and can do all those things. Bullshit. 99.9% of them have never done anything but move data through layers and present it.
Throw these wannabes an enterprise system with monoliths and microservices willy nelly, orchestrate that shit with a vertical slice nginx ssi with disaster recovery, horizontal scaling, domain modeling, version management, a busy little bus and events flowing all decimal points of 2pi. Then, if you fully master everything going on there, I believe you are full stack.
Otherwise you just scraped the surface of what complexities software development is about. Everyone who can read a tutorial can scrape together an "in-out" website. But if your db is looking the same as your api, your highest complexity is the alignment of an infobox, I will laugh loud at your full stack.
And if you told me in an interview that you are full stack, you'd better have 10+ years experience and a good list of failed and successful projects before I'd let you stay the next two minutes..1 -
My boss just called me and asked to write a email informing our clients to not to download the update we pushed this very evening because Application is crashing when you will open that particular page.
What went wrong? One of our senior Developer, let's call him Mr. X, is totally against of testing the app before deploying it to clients. He believes that as i have created the application, i know exactly what to change to accomplish a requested feature or bug in application.
When a ticket assigned to him about a bug in the application, he simply make some changes in code, create the package and send it to test department. How do I know? He even boast it in front of us.
Most of the time it works but not every time like today. And I am pretty sure my boss is not going to ask a explanation about this to him.
I have great respect for him. It's okay to have confidence but testing before sending it to anybody will not make you junior. Will it? Being a senior You are making others to be careless about his job.
That's what happen today. Mr. X failed so does the testing department. So am I. I am the head of testing department as well.
I am not blaming him. I just cant. It was our job to test app thoroughly. I am feeling pretty bad now. His confidence made me vulnerable. Say his confidence made me clearly a fool. Lesson has been learned though.2 -
YOU ARE YOUR OWN TEACHER. The failures I got in the past , failed to build a simple app , I get to where I am today because I failed many times.
My best teacher for this will always be my mistakes , my mistakes are the greatest teacher3 -
I fucking got scammed.
Scenario 1: Had literally no experience in B2C, no experience in experimentation, 0% fitment.
Verdict: got hired in just one round in a top domestic brand which is a profit making startup.
Scenario 2: A friend from ex-org got referred in a global brand for an international location. Hadn't interviewed for 4+ years. Created his resume in 15 minutes, got shortlisted, screened, interviewed, and hired in less than 2 weeks.
(This guy is a good friend I am incredibly happy for him and that he scored the gig and in now way I wish bad for his outcome).
Scenario 3: I also got a strong refferal for the same brand and location. I have been interviewing for past 6 months, resume is super polished where companies like FAANG spoke to me.
Got rejected in shortlisting. The referral guy got me in the pool because it was his team
In screening round, I was a good fit, answered everything well. Yes, I wasn't concise as much (and that's the feedback I kept getting and I was working on it).
Verdict: rejected. They didn't ask me relevant questions and rejected me on the basis of not having the required experience.
Seems like the hiring manager didn't want me to clear so came up with reasons.
And now it feels that, if the HM wants you, they'll hire you irrespective of anything and if they don't they'll kick you out for lamest of the reason.
My life is split in two part, the first three decades were surely shit and this was my last chance of making sure the next three are worth remembering on the death bed.
I failed. Miserably. For the factors outside of my control. Not that I haven't failed in past. Not that I didn't try again.
But man, I am doing persisting. The game is rigged. One cannot win without extreme luck.
Millions of dreams shattered. A shitty day, is now a shitty life.
Being born in third nation is a fucking curse.5 -
Hey DevRant fam ❤️ hope everyone is doing well ! I just finally finished this extremely difficult semester and also my FINAL EXAM!!! no more exams but Projects!! honestly guys and gals this has been my toughest semester yet apart from the time I failed Discrete mathematics twice... and i feel as if i have done well 😁👏🏻.
Anyways guys i hope you’re all doing amazing Wherever you may be!
Kind regards
The Kind King himself
Milo 🥂2 -
Oldie but goldie.. after my studies, I was looking for my first job and did interviews. In one of the companies, they asked me whether I knew C. Well yes, I had been programming in C. Ah no, that wasn't enough - they asked whether I was really good in C. I got suspicious and argued that there was the project documentation anyway, right? Turned out, no. The code was the documentation, as I had suspected.
Then my question - as freshman, mind you: "Do you have any plans to get to a more professional way of developing?"
The interview was pretty much over at that point, the boss got actually angry. Well, interviews work both ways, and he had failed. I surely dodged a bullet.2 -
For the last week or so I've been writing a userbot for Telegram. Completely from scratch, plus Telethon to not reinvent the wheel entirely. I'm coming from the codebase of an existing userbot.
That userbot is written by a good friend of mine, who makes 6 figures, and whom I respect greatly. However the code is a steaming pile of shit. Now that is not his fault, he largely inherited that code too, tried to fix it, failed, gave up.
I am reimplementing it entirely. I'm only looking at the modules, trying to understand them, and copying over the necessary bits and changing them where necessary. But I've come across some nasty shit.
Userbots often edit existing messages from real Telegram clients. They're kind of like a login to your account, but with a program rather than a regular client. You send a message from a real client, it sees it and does whatever it needs to, and edits your message to give you feedback. Which is great.
However, there's no need to do simple string edits by importing "re". So why do you? Because you're an idiot, that's why. The old bot is based on Paperplane, which in turn is based on Telethon. Why do I see function calls to Telethon in some places and Paperplane in others? Because you're an idiot, that's why. Why does the dig module fail to even give correct answers? Because you know nothing about the DNS, that's why. And you didn't learn about RRs before implementing it.
And don't you tell me that this code is shit, and this bot is slow only when I run it on a fucking Pentium. I run this shit on an i7 and CPU isn't even the issue - memory, disk and such are. If you had any clue whatsoever about efficiency, you would've known because it's blatantly obvious. There's a reason why my machines rarely go past 5% CPU utilization. It's the fastest component in the entire fucking system.
When users come and say.. hmm this application of yours, it consumes a lot of memory. It takes a long time to do X and Y and I don't quite understand why, it seems illogical. Then maybe you should go look at your code, like you would look at yourself in the mirror. And then you fucking go fix it so that I don't have to. You're an engineer just like I am. And I am not even a dev proper - I'm a sysadmin by trade. Why should I have to fix your shit for you?1 -
Never buy crappy, consumer-grade SSDs for use in production servers/RAIDs. This might sound obvious but at the company I used to work for, through a series of bad decisions by management and cheapness, we ended up with the cheapest consumer SSDs you can imagine powering all of our storage.
This turned into a nightmare spanning years of failed hard drives and a continues cycle of ridiculousness. Drive failed after a few days, gets taken out, sent back to manufacturer and then replaced with another equally crappy drive destined to fail within days/weeks.
Our ops people were going to the data center multiple times per week to replace failed drives. Lesson I learned: cheaping out on system-critical hardware and software can have long standing consequences and in the end usually doesn't end up actually saving money when you account for time employees have to spend dealing with issues that result from it. -
A story about burnout you say? Well, here it goes.
In 2019, I worked in a now-defunct startup. Back then, I was deep in "treatment" with wrong medications that almost ended up turning me into a vegetable. When I was hired, my mind was already deteriorating quickly, and I was caught in a downward spiral of losing intelligence.
Prior to working there, there was never ever ever a situation in my career when I was given a problem to solve and failed to do it.
But right then, with already double-digit IQ and constant, pumping anxiety, I was seeing task descriptions that looked familiar and doable, yet I absolutely could not do them. I couldn't comprehend. It was an absolutely screeching, crippling panic about me losing my intelligence forever, being fired and ending up unhireable, dying alone on the streets.
Apart from my depression I recovered from, this very experience was a trauma that haunts me to this day, every day. You know, my experience being raped as an adolescent doesn't, but this, it's something else. Now, my intelligence is back, I design architecture, I'm a CTO, and my solutions are objectively cleaner and better in every way than what I did pre-depression. Yet, I still feel a sharp, sudden rush of anxiety, and my heart skips a beat, when I think about writing code or even opening the IDE.
I don't know how does one recover from this. I'm now slowly transitioning into "architecting CTO" role that is just being a devrel, assessing ethics, working with business to realize their need, designing solutions and leaving the implementation for the team to do. You know, the stuff I was taught in the uni.
Maybe doing open source and launching small pet projects will help. But at this stage of my life I have no emotional resource to care.11 -
Hey i see you published your tool without a hint of a build instruction you failed attempt of a decent human being, i hope you dissolve into the puddle of cum you once were next time it rains :)1
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Amazing! My joke functionality worked and the server delivered it's content successfully to the client. The joke: malloc is wrapped to give that message and retry IMMEDIATELY. Expectation is that the computer that was already in panic mode gets even fucked up more because it's out of memory. My malloc is literally while((ptr=malloc()} == NULL) { show_warning()
;malloc();}. Imagine if it didn't give that warning, I would've never known that a malloc failed. Who checks their freaking malloc result? You should, but i do not see much people doing it.
The previous crash on screen is what happens if you're doing a get instead of a post. I just declare my server app indestructible btw. Ffs!
5 -
Windows decides to finish faulty programs whenever it likes. İt's so annoying, I did just one small mistake in c++. I wrote "new char(length);" instead of "new char[length];" and I have been dealing with this shit for three days. Then I run the program on Linux and boom it failed in the same spot, which I fixed. But in Windows it sometimes runs, sometimes fails or sometimes even fails on unrelated places. Wtf windows? How about security and shit. There was literally a buffer overflow and you still keep running the program. And why GCC didn't even popped a warning. I hate developing c :(8
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I gave you a chance, Nvidia. It could have been a good thing, but no. You are still crap. About two years ago, my son's graphics card (an Nvidia) died, so I thought, I'll give him my nice Radeon card, and got myself a new card. For some reason, reason failed me, and I got a GTX 1070. It's been a nice enough card, and worked well. And then the last driver update happened. Fallout 4 started to CTD before it even booted to the main menu. Me, not thinking (again) thought it was a mod, so I uninstalled and deleted and reinstalled again, with all 120 mods. Nope. Still crashing. Then I noticed, as the game booted, the fans started to ramp up, and I could tell exactly when it would crash be the sound of fans. I was expecting the computer to taxi out the room. Rolled the driver update back to the last one that worked. Now I can log in again, and things are mostly stable. Still crashes, but not as bad, probably due to reloading the mods and missing something. When the RX 3080 hits the market, bye bye Nvidia. You haven't changed a bit over the years. We're through.8
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OKAY BUT WHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE HAVE TO ACT LIKE THEY'RE SOME KIND OF GOD WHEN THEY CAN'T EVEN PASS AN INTRO CLASS. Some background: I go to an early college in high school program which offers computer science where you take two college classes a semester starting you junior year in high school. AND THIS GIRL TALKS ABOUT THIS PROGRAM LIKE IT'S AWFUL AND SHE HATES IT AND HOW THE PROFESSORS DON'T TEACH AND SHE FAILED AN INTRO TO PROGRAMMING CLASS WHICH TEACHES JAVA BUT THEN SHE ACTS LIKE SHE'S WAY ABOVE THE OTHER KIDS IN MY CLASS BECAUSE SHE'S RETAKING IT. SHE'S ALSO A STUDENT ASSISTANT IN MY CYBER SECURITY CLASS BUT DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THE localhost IP IS. I UNDERSTAND THAT I DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING BUT AT LEAST I DON'T ACT LIKE I DO. IT'S SO INFURIATING!!!!!!
-
For those who had already followed my story here, a while ago I was in bad hands having several employers not professionally consistent (unfortunately).
Soon like any professional, I went in search of other jobs and looking for something better for me. I did several interviews with several recruiters around the world (massively trying to go to Europe).
Some never gave me feedback, they never wanted to at least respond to messages, emails or direct messages on LinkedIn.
Until one day a company whose owners are of the same nationality as mine opened the doors for me I came to Europe to work for a client of theirs and that client absorbed me in his company and today I am their CTO.
And magically all those recruiters from different nationalities appeared with the old man "hey, remember me ?! So about that interview, it really didn't work, right? But now I have another *** opportunity ***, how are you? Available for a conversation?"
I have already made several selection processes in my professional life, and I never failed to answer a candidate (that's right, everyone, even negative feedbacks) and I am proud of that. I am a dev and I still did the only job that HR should have done, it gives feedback.
With a lot of joy in my heart I say that the game has turned.4 -
Client: How long will it take you to build this?
Me: Maximum of 7days
Day 1 to Day 5, To myself: I have so much time, lemme build a Js engine in Rust and open-source it. It shouldn't take that long.
Day 6, After many failed attempts at debugging RegExp:
Starts working on the client's product, scraps off sleeping hour (why do I sleep in the first place)
Day 7: At 23:59...calls clients, he doesn't answer, probably sleeping... Sends message "Product ready to be tested at your call, I've not slept in 7 straight days because I like you"4 -
I have a huge deadline coming up. It's important for the future of the project that we show a mostly complete version of the product to the client that day.
They ask if I can do it. I say yes, but it will be very taxing. And by taxing, I mean it's going to use up the remaining energy and motivation I have for anything. And I've made that clear to everyone.
Coworker:
Here's an unrelated task that will take 6.75 hours of your day and I will hound the boss until he makes you do it. And I am going to send you messages after work that foreshadow another day of doing things that aren't deadline related.
So when deadline day comes around and I have to present something that has two work days of work missing, they're going to look at me like I failed. And not that I had two of my days stolen from me doing miscellaneous chores that could have waited.19 -
HELL FUCK AND HELL YEAH AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME!
Why? Well... You maybe remember that I Posted a Rant where i said that i Stream EVERY 3D Print i do. And... That I wanted to make an Easter Bunny, that failed... Failed Horribly... and thanks to the Fact im streaming everything i could just REWIND the footage AND FOUND THE ERROR! AND IM SO FUCKING GLAD THAT I DID THIS!
GOOD DOCUMENTATION IS A MUST FOR EVERYTHING!!! DOCUMENT YOUR WHOLE FUCKING LIFE! JUST FUCKING DO IT!3 -
Today I ended a coding session by fixing a problem I’ve been having but not the problem I was attempting to patch and I ended up screaming “SHIT NO I FAILED SUCCESSFULLY”
a friend of mine that over heard me was like “dude those aren’t words that work together”
I just replied with “you would think so but it’s more common than you think” -
BEST DISCLAIMER NOTICE
* I'm not responsible for bricked devices, dead SD cards, thermonuclear war, or you getting fired because the alarm app failed (like it did for me...).
* YOU are choosing to make these modifications, and if you point the finger at me for messing up your device, I will laugh at you.
* Your warranty will be void if you tamper with any part of your device / software. -
I learned recently that you can inject SQL lines in some fields like Passwords or usernames on some websites. (Hacky hacky)
At work there is this intra website that is used to manage the parts of the radios and computers we repair.
Each piece has a specific number, and there is a tree with every pieces for each radio/computer.
When we get to repair one, we gotta change the pieces virtualy on the website. Sadly sometimes, the virtual pieces aren't marked like they followed the whole Radio from the place they come to the place we repair (we need it to replace the piece). People are just not doing their job, so we have to send emails and call for them do it so we can repair it. (This is already fucked up.)
Today, I had to replace a piece, but it was marked like it's not there. I called the guy, and it seems like he is on a vacation for weeks. My superior was super annoyed due to the urge of this task.
Guess who managed to change the _mainlocation_ of the _piece_ in the _radiopieces_ table. (Not actual names, you malicious cunt)
I spent 3 hours looking for the name of the fields and table. I don't know how many times I had to refresh the dam page to see I failed once again.
Hopefully I didn't have to guess all of them. Also the joy when I realised I succeed !!!
No one bats a eyes, and I'm here, feeling infinitely superior, as I might get punished for wanting to do my job.
I know it's basic moves to some of you, but dam it felt good.
Conclusion: Do what you have to, specially when it takes 5 minutes and people need it.10 -
You know what, let me jump in on the "I hate PHP" bandwagon.
A couple months ago I upgraded my mail servers unattended. Roundcube got fucked for a couple of months, and I figured.. fuck it, I can still use Dovecot for authenticating with desktop mail clients like K-9.
Recently I unfucked it, turns out that it was an issue with the sock file in php-fpm. That's also when I noticed that PHP apparently hardcodes in its current version in the bloody socket file. Because why the fuck wouldn't you? It makes upgrades so much fucking easier!!! Said no fucking sysadmin ever!!!
And today I upgraded one of my mail servers to Ubuntu Server 18.04, finally, after a lot of hesitation. Bad decision, because now PHP got fucked YET AGAIN.
Again an issue with socket files? I have no fucking idea. systemctl shows no failed services (because you know PHP, why would you fail your service with an error message instead of throwing a meaningless 502 Bad Gateway, right?!!) and looking at the config files, well the socket file got its new php-fpm 7.2 file (still got the fucking version number hardcoded in) and thus I changed that socket file location in /etc/php/7.0...
devRant may just have been my rubber duck.
WHY THE FUCK DO YOU STINKING FUCKING PILE OF SHIT CALLED FUCKING PHP KEEP THE FUCKING 7.0 DIRECTORY OUT THERE WHEN YOU'VE UPGRADED, WITHOUT EVEN HAVING THE FUCKING BALLS TO RENAME THE MOTHERFUCKING DIRECTORY TO 7.2, IF YOU'RE GOING TO HARDCODE IN YOUR VERSION NUMBERS ANYWAY?!!!!!
Bloody fucking pile of fucking junk!!!!18 -
Saturday 9.00 AM. I was sleeping, my colleague (on holiday) sent me a text: "We got a problem on our system, probably we ran out of space". I checked the log and found out that several cron jobs failed due to not enough space on the disk. I started deleting some unnecessary logs (we're paranoid) and ended up to squeeze the vm like a lemon to save some space. Sent an email to the sysadmin, "We got to add more space ASAP, users are getting 500 errror for almost everything". Silence. I thought to myself: "Until monday we're safe..". I did a df (96%) and sent a screen to the sysadmin, just to be sure that we understood each other. Finally monday comes, nobody worries about the issue. At noon I literally takled the guy of IT dept. "Yeah, we read your email. I think the sysadmin didn't take you seriously". "Why? Which part of 'we're running out of space' isn't serious?!!!". "He just told me that we have unlimited space on that vm". Unlimited space...sure.... "Right.....the disk is at 96%, buuuuut if he said so No news to worry. Don't call me if everything burns. Have a good day!!!"4
-
!Dev
the fuck...
I'm not very good in remembering numbers. But I have lots to remember: apartment entrance code, maestrocard pin, phone pin, s few pins at work, and so on. So I remember patterns my finger mskes on a numpad instead [if you have played Ingress, you know exactly how it works].
There is a pattern for a bank card. Another one for phone pin, etc.
I've been using this technique for years... It has never failed me. I never could remember my pins, but give me a keypad and I'll enter it right away.
Last week smth happened. I forgot 2 pins from both of my bank cards... Both at the same day. And I did not have them written down anywhere for years...
Shit3 -
Fucking Windows.
Before everyone starts saying that I should switch to Linux, I prefer Windows as my primary OS and Linux as a secondary OS.
Anyways, I updated my Windows a few days ago and ever since, instead of fucking shutting down it acts like it goes into hibernation. If I tell you to shut down, that means to shut down, not save everything and reopen everything when I turn you back on.
Besides that, why the fuck is it trying to install some Canon printer driver, that I don't even have! Thus leading it to fail every god time I turn off my PC, and then it says "Updates failed to install."
Seriously, had no problem with Windows until a few days ago. Simple terms, fuck Microsoft right now.2 -
I have not gotten a new phone in years. I am happy with my current one but unfortunately you need fucking at least 4gb of ram in your PHONE to run apps nowadays so it freezes frequently.
Watched the launch event for the OnePlus 7 very impressed. Price: high but not too high.
What they failed to mention, and I only found out a few hours later from a reviewer (Linus) is that they removed the audio jack. Come on guys that's just a dick move.
There are still enough redeeming qualities that I will purchase the device (90hz amoled 1440p 93% screen display? *Drooling*) but I am disappointed and feel slightly conned that in your detailed, 30 minute overview of the phone, you avoided mentioning this.21 -
Here’s book most of you have either read a newer edition or some variant based on this book, as computer science students you had to take an intro to logic course.. prior to digital logic.. or atleast that’s how it went for me and many others I know.
Which regardless how much the universities screwed up teaching comp sci and programming.. this is one aspect I think they nailed. Requiring philosophical logic course for comp sci.
Again this isn’t a digital logic book. It’s just philosophical logic. The first edition of this book came out in 1953... and I think they are edition 14 or 15... for a book to have this many editions and last this long thru time it’s a good book.
It’s a book that should be a must read for anyone venturing into AI and working on human machine thought processing.
It’s a great book to have around as reference, considering philosophical logic is not a walk in the park atleast not in the beginning because it requires you to change the way you view things.. more specifically it requires you to think objectively and make decisions objectively rather than subjective emotional reasoning.
Programmers need to think objectively with everything they do. The moment you begin thinking subjectively .. ie personal style, wishes and wants, or personal reasons and put that into code for a code base with a team u just put the team at risk.
Does this book teach objective thought? No... indirectly yes, because it teaches the objective rules of logic... you don’t get to have an emotional opinion on wether you agree or disagree or whatnot, logic is logic even philosophical. Many people failed the logic course I was in university.. infact the bell curve was c- / D ... many people had to take the course more than once.. they even had to change the way the grading was done.. just to get more people to pass...
But here’s the thing it’s not about it being taught wrong.. people just couldn’t adapt to thinking objectively, with rules as such in philosophical logic courses. Grant it the symbols takes time getting use to but it literally wasn’t the reason people failed.. it was their subjective opinions and thought process interfereing with the objectiveness of the course exams and homework.
5 -
!rant GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!
I failed at a dating sim, how the fuck did I fail at a dating sim? They're designed to make you feel love and romance or some shit like that! The girl got hit by a car, almost died, got amnesia, forgot all about me and then presumably started dating me, but I don't know CAUSE THE FUCKING GAME ENDED!
*sigh* I have work to get back to.13 -
MS Teams:
*Notification*: Bob sent you a message: "Hello netikras. Got a minute for a call? Andrew told me <...>"
Open up Teams, open chat with Bob. Last message received -- 2 weeks ago. Chat summary on the left (chats list) shows the last message was 2 minutes ago with "Hello netikras. Got a...."
Prolly just javascript failed to fetch the full message to display it in the chat.. refresh the Teams tab
Same thing.
How the f*ck do I read the full message? WHAT DID ANDREW TELL BOB????
Fucking Micro$oft... Ironically, the only thing they're good at is hardware. Well okay and the office suite.
Can't even make a working chat app that doesn't lose messages or doesn't behave like a three-headed dragon with multiple personalities in each head.4 -
Google, will you ever manage to fix YouTube so it actually doesn't fucking break every day?
This "feature" where the page doesn't reload when I click reload is neat until I want to, you know, reload to see new content. Or reload because you failed to load a single video thumbnail. But no, you managed to combine the shit of both worlds and give me a loading progress bar and then don't change anything.
Also YouTube is the prime example why you don't try to reinvent text input fields. I can't remember a single instance in the last 5 years where the comment fields didn't have at least one weird bug.
Why do tech companies build the shittiest websites?10 -
Me: *Showing the "You ! Count" image from devRant to a friend*
Friend: Haha! Nice one!
Me: You should install devRant, the image is from there
Friend: What is devRant?
Me: It's like Twitter, but only for programmers
Friend: No thanks, I don't like Twitter
I have failed you, master!2 -
Impostor Syndrome...
I dropped out of university because of Maths (I'm not really that bad at maths, but that thematic wasn't really mine... But whatever) and obviously had no job nor any graduation (except my school thingy) and wasn't able to study something computer science related, because that's how it goes in Germany... (If you can't pass a certain subject, you will get blocked for the studies that involve that subject for 2 years or sth... Because I failed in Maths meant that I'm fucked)
So I started an apprenticeship to atleast do something and get that degree.
In my new company I really felt (and sometime feel it nowadays) like I'm the fifth wheel on the car and don't really achieve anything (but i really do).
That really fuckin sucks and hinders the fun that I could have in my job :/6 -
Ok everybody, listen up.
For a long time, even before I knew devrant, I failed an exam and had to retake it. It was, and I think this is fair to say without exageration, the worst thing that had happened to me. Put me deep into an anxiety crysis that it was very difficult to escape from. Months of hard work, at the sacrifice of many other valuable things, helped me to climb out of this hole. It was a struggle, but I finally made it. Earlier today I retook the exam. It was great. Thank you for standing by in this difficult time of my life. We live in a post-thisfuckingexam-time. Many of my rants on here were influenced by this issue. Now they probably wont ever be again. Thank god, and thank me for keeping it up.
Tldr: i wrote an exam today.3 -
Here's a task for the bored of you ;)
"Write a python script that prints out all numbers y from one to 10**30(including 10**30) that have two of these traits: [n**5=y, m**3=y, x**2=y] but not the other one; n and m are whole numbers."
Correct answer was about 103000
I can't seem to find the solution... Here's my (failed) try:
10 -
so Broadcom bought VMWare.... so now whenever you go to any community support page that used to be on VMWare's community, you're just always redirected to Broadcom's support homepage...
another billion dollar company that has failed to understand the basics in HTTP and DNS
what do i expect...
i don't know, they probably only have like 2 devs, i shouldn't be so hard on them
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡3 -
It was time of my grade 11 result.
When result was out, I asked my school coordinator about the number of students failed and he replied it was non of my business. I got back home, coded a script in python to fetch the result of 233 students and pass it to text a file. Printed it and gave it to the coordinator the next day, he was like "Ok, I'll tell computer science teacher to give you full marks on practicals"4 -
TL;DR despite 0 year professional programming I am lead of a large travel booking web-app, this is new to me and my boss, who has repeatedly ignored my advice and moved me on before finishing work. Client is not happy, project is way overdue, and yet has just sent NEW FUCKING DESIGNS.
Recap
https://devrant.com/rants/480004/...
https://devrant.com/rants/431725/...
https://devrant.com/rants/872255/...
Client has sent some redesigns of core search functionality on a project that is overdue and over budget.
DO YOU ACTUALLY *WANT* THIS PROJECT TO FAIL?5 -
Stupid stupid stupid API that returns a 204 on failed validations.
Informative docs? Hell no! Here's a few hundred long-ass field names that you need to pass as a JSON.
Doesn't work huh? Yeah, you're structure's all wrong. Some of these are grouped in vaguely named keys like "Wholesale".
Oh you need those as well? Yeah, you can see the whole structure if you try to GET an object.
Oh you need an ID to GET an object? Yeah you can just go ahead and create as many as you want. This is just a sandbox API, it's cool.
Oh that's not the point? Ahh you need the structure to be able to create one! *haha* Right, I'll get back to you on that.
* Email correspondence over 2 weeks time. I have still yet to be able to make a an actual successful request. The fucking 204 doesn't count if it doesn't actually create the resource.
Fucking fucky fuckity fuck fuck fuck.
I swear to god if I ever meet this guy in person, I will probably buy him coffee or beer and have a long talk about how to build proper REST APIs.
Because I'm nice like that.8 -
What do you think of LinkedIn's quizzes? I passed the JavaScript one but failed JSON... JSON!! Are you fucking serious! How is that even possible!!!10
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I finally managed to install arch 😊 (in virtualbox).
I tried a few months ago on my actual computer but got the flashing underscore, and failed to find the cause. Ever since I've been meaning to try again but always didn't like the prospect of sitting there for ages just to end up with a complete mess. Luckily the tutorial seems a load clearer now (or maybe my understanding has improved) so it worked first time (second time if you count going back because I forgot to install a network manager).
Now I've just got to get a desktop environment, thinking of trying lxqt, and I forget about it for a while until I come back and realise everything's broken.3 -
!Rant But this is hilarious 😂
Appraisal interview of Gayle:
Gayle:- Sir, I scored 211 Runs in 118 Balls. I made the team win the crucial match. I should get “A” rating.
Management:- You hit 17 Sixes and 23 Fours. Though, that is good but that is not something new you have done. That is why we hired you. As this is not something new, I will mark it as “Innovation Lacking”.
Gayle:- But sir, I played according to the situation. I took 21 singles as well.
Management:- Exactly, your performance is not consistent. You played 15 Dot Balls as well. This means, you failed to optimize the resources.
Gayle:- But…
Management:- Also, I would like to mention that you are not a team player. The whole team scored 112 and you all alone made 211.
Gayle:- What??
Management:- Yes. So, overall, you are getting a “C” rating for the year. Improve Consistency, Innovation, Utilization and Team Work...1 -
Wouldn't say our teamwork failed we just sucked that day.
I had a ticket to fix a SQL sp and then correct some data afterwards. As this was the typical "urgent fix need now" we went through a different process for fixing it.
Me: Just sent you some scripts can you check them over before we apply it to uat?
Boss: let's go through it together.
5 mins later
Boss: looks fine I'll apply the scripts.
2 minutes later
Me: did you apply the scripts to uat?
Boss: No I applied them to live.
Me: oh ... oh no.
At this point I realized I was missing a critical where clause so yup my update was applied against all of the data.
Boss: oh
Yup he just spotted my error.
Helpdesk phones start ringing
Boss: you pick it up it's your code
Me: hey you applied its your problem now.
One db restore and several incident meetings later we fixed it. Twas a fun day.1 -
During 6 months I updated myself day and night on java, springboot and AWS.
I failed most of the technical interviews on my preferred stack, however I got a job, where the probable stack is C#, dotnet and Azure.
So, I have a couple of weeks of very good quality rant ahead.
I just started.
hmmm let's see, should I use Visual Studio or Visual Studio CODE. I spent the morning before understanding they were different. I could have spent the morning Studying how To Visually fuck you, lame name chooser.
Now I'm following a tutorial.
I need .NET 5.0, but guess what, I have .NET core 3.1.
But wait, fuck, .NET and .NET CORE are not the same thing! Will .net core 3.1 work for a .NET project or not?
And there goes the afternoon. Is he the same guy who choose the names?
I'll tie you with a barbed wire net and fuck you to the core, you asshole7 -
One of my students failed one of the necessary tasks for exam admittance, then handed in the next one (even a bit too late via email instead of uploading it properly lol). Then I reminded him that he already failed the course and that I cant accept his solution, thinking he might not have read my previous evaluation?
"oh yea, that's right, i remember now!"
I mean like.. how do you forget something like that?!?!6 -
You may know I love to hate tests. Well not the tests actually, what I hate is the TDD culture.
DBMS schema in my app dictates a key can either have a value, or be omitted - it can't be null, and all queries are written with that in mind (also they're checked compile-time against schema). But tester failed to mock schema validation, inserted a bunch of null keys with mock data, actually wrote assertions to check those keys are null (even though they never should be), and wanted me to add "or null" to my "exists" queries.
No, we don't need more tests, and you're not smart with your "edge cases" argument. DBMS and compiler ensure those null values can never exists in our DB, and they're already well tested by their developers. We need you to stop relying on TDD so much you forget about the practical purpose of the code, and to occasionally break from the whole theoretical independent tests to make sure your testing actually aligns with third-party services some code uses.
And no, we don't need more tests to test your mocks, and tests to test those test, and yo dawg, I heard ...5 -
I got such a bad employer… oh, pardon me: committent-but-actually-employer-minus-the-responsabilities that I developed bruxism, rage bursts and chest pains due to anxiety.
Bright side 1: i quitted by saying them in their face “you don’t even fucking know what docker is and you claim to be an expert, get a fucking update”
Bright side 2: They failed a while… Oh wow much surprise, very unexpected considering that they fired the only dev with experience on the product and that they re-made the interface every other day making everyone’s job a miserable joke. Smart move, 10/10 would invest in them.
The “bright side” in this is mostly that I’m forced to accept I was a very valuable asset and shut up any imposter syndrome related to that bs work.
Bright side 3: It forced me to see someone which in turn forced me face some piled up shit, so I recently feel better and hate myself less!1 -
NOTHING FUCKING WORKS OMG.
I WANT YOU TO RUN EVERY FUCKING 15 MINUTES, IS THAT SO FUCKING HARD? THE ONLY THING THAT'S GOING TO BE HARD AROUND HERE, IS ME!
Geez, all I am trying to do is to run a php script every 15 minutes, and literally every solution I have tried has failed...4 -
I fucking hate Microsoft. I fucking HATE it.
I'm supposed to be setting up a Hyper-V VDI environment on a Windows Server 2019 instance. I got all RDS roles installed, but can't see any fucking templates to make a collection out of.
I don't think that the RDVH role got installed correctly because it can't communicate properly with the RDCB, but both roles are installed on the SAME SERVER. I get stupid and unhelpful errors like "Error: 0: ScenarioBasedDeployment: Job Finished for Cmdlet" and when I tried to create a Quick Start Deployment: "QuickVMCollection: Provisioning job failed. Reason: ". Yeah, I typed that correctly. No reason listed.
I reach out on Technet, and I'm told that I need to contact Microsoft Support directly because my problem is beyond the scope of the forum.
I try contacting Microsoft Support, and they want to charge $499 for a one-time helping fee.
My company does not want to spend any money, and we do not already have support services.
I'm supposed to have VDI set up and working by Friday.
Fuck YOU.4 -
Fuck XCode! -
Yesterday I had the stupid idea to rename an icon file. Checked that XCode was building the application still fine. Ran it over the build server: Failed, complaining about the old missing icon file! Checked again and again, but there was no friggin' reference to the old file in the whole repo.
Log in to the machine clear the build folder and try to build the component again. Bang still same error and the references to no longer existing files reappear.
Turns out XCode was caching those references somewhere in the home directory as "DerivedData" and after deleting those, I could build again... but why on earth are you building a cache if you cannot properly invalidate it? Just to waste our time?
(@xcodesucks)3 -
XCode you fucking piece of shit...
So I just wanted to process my ios app to the app store and start the archive process. All of the sudden:
Command CodeSign failed with a nonzero exit code
What? So there is an error and you cannot tell me the error code? All information you give me that it isn't zero!? Wow... Amazing... What a great user experience. Maybe it cannot resolve the error? Maybe it is some external tool Apple has no access to and that is the only valid error they can throw at us?
Oh hell no! It has something to do with the keychain access! But why tell the user? That wouldn't be as much fun as just tell it is a nonzero error, isn't it apple?!
In the end locking and unlocking my key chain solved the problem... Thanks for nothing XCode!2 -
Last week i couldn't use a website to download a product because it failed on every browser and even with addons deactivated. The error said "please input the version" and version is a checkbox.
Wrote to support.
Me: "Download does not work! It gives error xyz. How can i get the product?"
Support : "Oh, you can easily get it from our download page."
Do you even read your mails?!? -
In 2012 during a job interview I was asked how did you learn Photoshop. I said by creating memes. My answer failed because the interviewer didn't knew what was a meme so I took another approx 30 seconds to pitch what was a meme.1
-
Checked mails and saw bunch of newsletters from the same company.
Me: huh? I don't remember subscribing to these. *scrolled down* here it is, (button to unsubscribe from these emails)
*Clicked and got redirected to their feedback page before unsubscribing.
Me: Cool, just need to provide feedback, not a big deal. *gave feedback*
Message reads : DONE. Operation failed. Due to technical error
What!! I'm gonna block the shit out of you!!
1 -
I took a certification test today that has an accumulative checkpoint score every 15 questions. I needed a 74 to pass the test... Here is a rough timeline of checkpoint scores and my thoughts:
64 - rough start I can recover
71 - OK, still failing but at least the score went up
63 - what the hell??
67 - OMG I am failing this test.
71 - You know, I don't need this job. I can find plenty of other work.
71 - This fucking test is brutal and I hate everyone. OMFG I only have an hour left!
Queue total internal meltdown. My job really depends on this certification.
73 - screw it. I failed. I am guessing from here on out.
77 - Holy shit I have a chance!! Only 25 questions to go. DONT SCREW THIS UP!
77 - YESSSSS My score didn't go down. 10 questions to go.
76 - Holy shit. After 6 month of studying, I passed the most brutal test of my life. ..... Barely. -
Don't need Netflix when you have a production deployment right before a long weekend. It has failed since last two weeks due to vulnerabilities present in one of libraries(P.S. FUCK JAVASCRIPT and Post release vulnerability scans!). You have rewritten the whole functionality from scratch twice! Security gates finally open for you, welcoming with arms wide open. So you click Deploy! DAFUQ!! FUCK MY LIFE! Deployment failed! It's only a 3 hour window to deploy! You frantically re-review your code, is it me?? Not again!! It isn't! Well, why is the deployment failing, you work against the clock. Going through configs, code, documentation! WTF is it?? Should I give up and raise a support ticket? Nope! You login to the server, sifting through logs and configs, there's a couple of other tickets with today's deadline. What are you going to do? And you get a hint! You take the hunch, change the config 5 minutes before deadline!
Get merge request approved, wait for the build, hit DEPLOY!! Nail biting 3 minutes! Your eyes fixed on the logs! Building..... Pushing instances..... Starting App..... SUCCESS!!! Finish the remaining tickets! Your long weekend still exists!3 -
Stupid idea?
I've been a designer for 10 years now and I'm stuck and bored. So I want to do something against that. I've tried countless times to learn to code on my own and failed. Now I fantasize of going abroad for 3 months. Hire a freelance full stack web developer to teach me 1on1 mo-fri 3-4 hours on how to make webapps. I've read that Kiev, Ukraine is very affordable and on upwork there are some amazing devs from kyiv.
But I'm not sure if that's a dumb idea?
What do you think? Would you teach someone for money? Any tipps on finding a webdev? Are you or do you know someone from Kiev or Ukraine?
15 -
PM:"I don't care how you dev build it, those are tech details, not my business, I only care about the business domain."
sounds familiar?
this is the main reason why so many projects failed, can you image any professional use such an asshole statement in other industry.1 -
Wanna know about hacks? I'll tell you. There is a peace of software called SugarCRM. It has OAuth2 provider implementation. I was assigned to write OAuth2 consumer for it.
It turned out they just failed to make it right.
The list of hacks:
* Hack on standard Authentication header. They use custom.
* Hack on "scope". They send null which is standard violation. So it is replaced to empty string before response processing starts.
* This is my favorite. Refresh token simply doesn't work. So we need to store user's credentials in memory to be able to reauthenticate user transparently.2 -
Tldr: I failed a test and was sad about jt
So a while ago I had a python exam for my study, nothing special like a certification or anything, just the basics. We are not allowed to use internet because they want to prevent people from communicating from one another. Usually im fine with this rule, but this time it screwed me over so much.
The exam is setup in 3 main assignments each of which has 5 subassignments. Hence, if you cant do subassignment 1, you fail the entire main assignment and lose 33% of your grade. I completely blacked out during the exam and couldnt remember how to simply get a number from a string interpreted as an int and forgot how to work with json. Because we weren't allowed to use internet I wasn't able to figure this out and have now failed the test.
I'm so sad and mad at myself for not acing such an easy test and for a day I felt unworthy of being a programmer. Thank God I got over that and have a resit somewhere next week.2 -
Rant rant = new Rant();
Rant.InternshipGotten = false;
Apparently I failed to provide enough reason why I would like to do my internship with them.
And I didnt have any affinity with programming according to them.
Im not a great talker assholes. But im good at programming.
How would you even know my affinity to programming? Because I dont have any personal projects running?2 -
The ridiculous and shameful story of how simply "installing Windows" saved my hard drive from the garbage.
(Also update on https://devrant.com/rants/3105365/)
It started with my root partition turning read-only all of a sudden. Some quick search suggested that I should check the sanity of my hard drive, by running a SMART test, which failed of course. I backed up my data using ddrescue and ran a badblocks over the whole thing, which found around 800 unreadable blocks in a row. I was ready to bid farewell to my drive, but as a last resort, instead of the trash, I brought it to this place where they claimed they can repair the damaged hard drives by "surgery".
To my surprise, they returned my drive the next week, saying it is all well now, and charged me 1/8 the price of a new drive, with a refund guarantee if there was a problem in two days. There was a problem right there: I ran another SMART test which failed again, and also the faulty blocks were still unreadable! So I stormed the place and called for my refund, showing the failed SMART report. The only answer I would get from the staff was "Have you tried installing Windows?".
I usually try to be patient in such situations; I really don't like to declare publicly that "not everyone uses that stinky piece of rotten software you call an OS", but their suggestion seemed totally irrelevant! I got all types of IO errors all over the damn thing and they told me to install Windows. Why? Because this was the only test they would rely on. At last I managed to meet the "technician" there and showed him the IO errors: tried to read the bad sectors with dd and failed. He first mumbled somethings like "Have you checked the connector?" or "Are these the same blocks?", but after he ran out of bullshit, he said "Why don't you just install Windows first and see if that helps?" and I was ready to explode in his face!
"You test drives by installing Windows, just because it will make a nasty NTFS partition and probably does an fsck? If you shut your mouth for a sec and open your eyes you'll see this is a shit load of IO errors we got here: You can't install Windows, you can't even make an NTFS here, because it will try to zero-the-fuck-out the damn partition and it will face the same fucking IO error that I'm showing you right now in almost one single fucking system call!"
"I don't know this kind of test you are using. We have our own tests and they've passed successfully. So all I can do is to give you a Windows CD if you want."
"I don't need a Windows CD. I will just try to make an NTFS partition on the error spot and I will fail."
"Ok. Then call me when your done."
I was angry, not only because I felt they're just trying to avoid a refund, but also because I knew I've lost my drive. But just with hope that I could get my money back, I made a small partition over the error spot and ran `mkfs.ntfs` on it. I was ready to show the failure to the guy, but I looked more precisely and saw that "the filesystem was created successfully!" I was sure something is nor write. I then successfully mounted the new partition, write over it and read it again. I even dd'ed the blocks again, and this time there was no IO error. All of a sudden everything was fine.
I didn't know what happened. Maybe it just needed a write, while I'd just tried to read from those blocks. But anyway, I didn't called the technician guy again. I just thanked one of the staff there and said that my problem was solved. I then ran a successful SMART test and then restored my backup. Ridiculous like that.
I'm still not sure if my drive will continue to live with no more problems. I also have no explanation for what happened. (I appreciate any help on this https://superuser.com/questions/...) But I really like to see the look on the poor guy's face when he finds out that trying to install Windows just saved my ass!11 -
<repost because previous one had many typos and grammatical mistakes>
I have arrived at a conclusion, rather two.
- I am a misfit who generally does not belong anywhere. Not that Steve Jobs Hipster type where you'd think I am a misfit genius. I am rather a misfit ignorant loser, at least for wide majority of things. I also have some ego issues of being included, hence I often turn out to be an asshole if things don't go according to me.
- People in general will hate you for no reason. And hate you more for your success. They'd be happy at your misery and pain. If you are running, walking, or even crawling towards success based on your hard-work, they will be jealous. Only time you are valued is when they need anything or can extract benefits out of you. Once you are drained, no one looks back because for them nothing more is left that could be exploited.
As long as you are providing, you'll be included.
This has significantly affected my self worth. I have allowed people to take advantage of me at the cost of my self respect and time.
These people are narcissist takers.
But there is a very very small group of people in my life, many of them I haven't even met and/or less frequently interacted, who are givers.
During my time with them, all they have done is kept giving me. Even when I asked them to stop or tried to resonate their kindness, they refused and kept giving me more. Most wonderful and best people in my life. I never failed to acknowledge their worth and valued them more than they deserved.
As of now, life is a mess.22 -
"Grub installation failed would you like to try again or continue without a bootloader?"
I was like well why in the burning hell would you even touch the bootloader on a completely different drive then you are installed on.
Boy, never was I so wrong...
That motherfucker deleted the windows bootloader and I've tried everything to get it back. Even tried to restore the whole frickin boatloader from scratch, with no success.
Best I could do was to make a pendrive with the bootloader on so I can boot up that shit. Four days have passed and still no luck in fixing it.
Well I guess I will call this a security feuture. If you don't insert the correct thumb drive you couldn't access the computer.5 -
Now it's over and failure seems certain...
In fact I'm certain that the interview app on my browser flickered for a second and showed some form with a red Failed text before displaying a Thank You page...
So it seems if I really want to get a tech offer, I have to focus on algos big time.... Hm....1 -
I inherited some code today. I am in the process of reworking it to drop into my framework so I can use it with our product. I am seeing this throughout the code...
try:
\do something\
except:
pass
Ahem... HANDLE YOUR DAMN EXCEPTIONS!!! DON'T JUST PASS THEM INTO THE BLACK HOLE OF NOTHINGNESS! FFS!!! Using pass like this means "Fuck it. I don't care if this fails and I want NOTHING to tell management when it does. I want to blindly look into their frustrated eyes and say ..duhh, I don't know why it failed... Fuck troubleshooting. You know what, this job isn't meant for me anyways." My outer voice is politely saying "There is a better way to do this. Please allow me to show you." Meanwhile my inner voice is flipping tables and clubbing baby seals. /rant -
"I see you're computing the same result multiple times, you shouldn't do that, here's how you optimize that out"
Okay listen you fuck, that's a null guard which goes directly into throwing an exception. The most optimal path is getting past the null guard as quickly as possible, which is what I do. Once you've failed the null guard, throwing an exception faster doesn't do you any good.
I swear plenty of FOSS programmers don't even really look at the project, they just find "errors" that make them feel smart.5 -
Must be great to be a giant fucking dumbass company raking in more than enough money, that you can't add 40-50 more characters on why your API doesn't like our call.
"Here's an API call with 3 different ways to make a call, we will show you an example for only the easiest method, AND if you get the more complex ways wrong, we'll just respond with an error code 422 with the error message "validation failed".
fuck.
you!!!!!!!!
I don't give a fuck about calling them out:
Its Bexio.5 -
When you your computers graphics card keeps crashing the computer.
I get 7 seconds before it crashes. About 5 are used up from typing in password and loading...
The next 2 seconds involve me trying to type in device into start menu... Next I will type in manager.
I am at the anger level where I am saying audibly "I will destroy you" "Arch is next" "Screw you Intel" "You have failed this city"
Real anger rising! 😠😡👈✂🗡🔪🔪🔫🔫🏹⛏🛢🛠🍺🍸🍹☠☡☢📵❌10 -
So I still have my very first email account, a hotmail account as a secondary, kinda spam account.
i signed up around 2000 i guess.
someone tried to get in, i got loads of mails of failed login attempts so i wanned to go and change my pw. But because of that bastard i cant login with just pw anymore, i need my phone. THAT ACCOUNT IS 20 FUCKING YEARS OLD. I never even provided a phone.
spent the last 20 minutes providing personal details to microsoft which are probably not the ones i used for signing up anyway.
you know how careful we were whem signing up for something online back them? I probably signed up as Thomas anderson from zion...
anyway, done now and bow it will take 24h for them to review it..
all of this only to reset my forgotten pw for my epic games account for with i signed up with that mail..,
holy guacamole.. I should start to trust password managers...1 -
I can't recall one single person I can call a mentor, however...
When I first started as a developer I had a senior to work with... I knew close to anything but I was always good at research and learning on my own... But we used an asp.net framework, it was new and there was little to no useful information, only basics... When I asked the senior (let's call him Joe) for help he gave me a quick answer:
Joe: Go to file xx, there's an example of what you need there...
Me: Well, been there and that's great but it doesn't help...
Everytime I was stucked during my first week it was always some sort of the same, so I insisted this time...
Me: so, Joe... I'm really stuck on this one, can you give it a look?
Joe: I know, I've been researching a way to do it for an hour now and can't get it either...
Me: wow! Thanks... But I thought you were an expert on this...
Joe: not really, never used it before. It's as new to me as it is to you! :)
So, that switched me from "this fucking weasel won't help me for shit" to "well, let's help each other"
We became good friends, always challenging each other and from that day on I stopped asking for help, and asking where can I help others...
I had great and greatly bad colleague and seniors. Each one thought me something either what to do or what not to do, how to act or not, how to tackle problems, how to teach...
Everyone I have worked with, worked for or trained is a mentor of mine. Even those I feel like I failed training thought me how to do better next time...
Thank you guys for being grate... Thank you assholes for teaching me how to send a guy go fuck himself! Good luck for those who get stucked with me -
“Why do you hate windows”
because this retarted os failed to boot today, i went to recovery mode and it automatically put windows boot manager above grub
FUCK YOU1 -
Aaaannnd again a failed interview.
Just because I didn't pay enough attention to the question.
Did that ever happen to you guys? Like you just write a huge pile of code, you look at it, you're proud, but it ends up not working because you forgot one little thing that makes it completely incorrect?5 -
Me: I have very perfect reason why I did not come to work to day .
Client: Please state your reason .
Me: its silly I don't wanna talk about it.
Client: please do
Me: my index fingers are hurting
Client: why
Me: what do you mean why I was tying to git push heroku master
But every time some json dependency failed -
Me searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My friend searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My ex-girlfriend searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My neighbor searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My Professor searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My Father searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My Ancestors searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My cat searching for a Machine Learning internship online.
My guitar searching for a Machine ... I'm fucking done.
Tried the Andrew NG thing 6 times.
You read that right. 6. six.
Failed 7 times. Statistically, i failed.
*no comebacks here, I don't know machine Learning so I am getting 0 fucks from my current girlfriend, and you said if I play guitar, I'll have her. FUCK NO.*2 -
Man, i hate these Windows 10 updates. Can't even boot up system properly anymore. Over an hour and half wasted with failed update installation EVERY SINGLE TIME!!
Happening 3rd time just today!
Why tf you trying to install update if its gonna fail?!!
I wish I could stop getting Windows 10 updates forever. Guys, Any ideas to block updates other than switching to linux?..
6 -
So here I work with this colleague that , at first , had a reasonable résumé. Whatever.
Time goed by and he is just doing tickets, clicking left and right, the usual grind of a shitty monitoring system which I am working intensely on deprecating that shit. Anyhoo
The last few days it became apparent that his resume was basically a hot air cake and he knows basically nothing intrinsically.
As I have stated before in previous rants, "everyone was a noob once"... But this guy...
He wants to do "something with Ansible"... "Ok what do you want to do?" , I asked (and I regret to have asked).
He basically wants to write new files on targets. Easy enough, I show him how he could do it with playbooks, inventory and role just for demonstrating the entire chain.
This guy chanes everything up, thereby breaking host group assignment, he launchea it on ALL machines...
Luckily it's a harmless file, so dodged a bullet there.
But the real wtf ia that he did it with the root account for our systems, without understanding the difference between "authentication" and "authorization"...
I am now explaining him what the difference is and how he can be able to check it. I give him the commands literally! ( sudo -l -U <user>)
Manages to fucking open up each sudoer file in vim , mistype or whatever he did in an attempt to leave vim... Breaks sudo...
Now he tries to spin it in such a way that I have steered him to break things.
"Dude you just fucking failed a copy/paste and you did absolutely fuckall without understanding what you are doing, then splurge out accusations because you did it wrong!"
FML3 -
I was thinking about the problems one of our clients faced with the launch of their project the other day, because things were rushed, stuff was omitted and in the end they could not meet the launch date, and I started making a list of hard lessons I learned over the years that would have helped them avoid this situation.
Feel free to add yours in the comments.
- Never deploy on Friday
- Never make infrastructure changes right before a launch
- Always have backups. Always!
- Version control is never optional
- A missed deadline is better than a failed launch
- If everything is urgent, nothing is important
- Fast and cheap, cheap and quality, quality and fast. Only one pair at a time can be achieved
- Never rush the start or the end of a project
- Stability is always better that speed
- Make technical decisions based on the needs of the project two years from now
- Code like you will be the only maintainor of the project two years from now. You probably will...
- Always test before you deploy
- You can never have too many backups (see above)
- Code without documentation is a tool without instructions
- Free or famous does not necessarily mean useful or good
- If you need multiple sentences to explain a method, you should probably refactor
- If your logic is checked beforehand, writing the code becomes way easier
- Never assume you understand a request the first time around. Always follow up and confirm
There are many more that should be on this list, but this is what came to mind now.2 -
Yay today my power extender broke!
(the thing that allows you to connect multiple devices to one sockiet, i dont remember the correct term)
That means i need to buy the new one! Because the old one is using rivots it means i cant repair it!
Stupic fucking lead free solder! Why do you even use this shit for connections? It will create those tin wiskers (small wires) that will short shit! This is the reason why my 3 old power extenders failed! And it is propably the reason why it failed as well!1 -
Anyone in here successfully using a pure FP language/ecosystem on their day to day?
I know of one of you that uses Scala, and myself I have an (admittedly) shitty application at work running in Clojure. These last two languages I mentioned are not pure FP.
I am talking about the likes of PureScript, Haskell, etc. Those mfkas.
If so,what is your experience working in said paradigm? I tried to keep my Clojure program as pure as possible, I failed, but enjoyed it.
And I know that FP is not a silver bullet, but in some scenarios when properly applied it can work beautifully. I also have React based applications with pure components, but Javascript itself is neither a functional(pure or otherwise) programming language, it merely supports functional paradigms.
Just wondering, no flamewars or anything like that, I just want to know your pros and cons.6 -
its two years since ive told a story here but lets go.
we got a new client, who is revamping their infrastructure. i gave some tasks to 2 dev ops guys (i am not devops). they were primarily bash scripts that needed to be altered. (ofc i can write scripts it takes a moment, its their jd)
after a week of chasing them around, getting no result from them, i end up doing it myself because client needs it and the company needs this client. for one task, they told me it does not apply to the component we were working on. (it did, and i did it)
we have a meeting with higher management, they asked me how did i implement it, i show my entire working, my backtracing etc (everyone knows this is how you approach huge system, component focused strict deadline task). it was infuriating how they approached it by trying to understand complete system in one week. i asked them why they hadn't taken component specific approach. they said they tried but failed because..
[this because is the whole reason for the rant, because i believe this because should be a fire-able offense]
..because we were not using VS code to find things in files
HOW IS WHAT TEXT EDITOR YOU USE OR DON'T USE AN EXCUSE
ARE YOU GUYS GETTING THIS?5 -
TIL: new M2 MacBooks officially support only single external screen. Not even the Pro class supports dual. It supports single 6K monitor, but I've failed to find any userfriendly ways to get good tiling which would be equivalent to multi-monitor. The only native tilling is left/right split. TB3 can handle 3x2K or 2x4K, but Apple said "fuck you and your multi-monitor setup".
I ain't mad tho. The guy upgrading to M2 sold me his dual monitors for a really good price.9 -
Him: i get this error when i insert into table, ForeignKey_contraint failed, what can i do?
Me: you have to obey the constraint, make sure it exists in the other table first
Him: ok i did that but i still get ForeignKey constraint error
Me: yeah that table has a couple foreign keys
Him: could you give me a very specific example how to insert into this table
Me: ........ here is a command to remove constraints on the table
Him: thanks, that fixed it!
I am helping a programmer who works with Costco integrate to software my company sells. I don't have source code, just an understanding of the database and what the software does. If he is getting paid more than me, then I should get a job there and ask for double, I could easily work 10 times faster than this buffoon. -
Why do SAMBA network drives have to suck this much? Yeah I understand that compiling to a network drive is probably a bad idea just for performance reasons alone but can't you at least not fuck with my git repo?
$ git gc
Enumerating objects: 330, done.
Counting objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Delta compression using up to 24 threads
Compressing objects: 100% (165/165), done.
Writing objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Total 330 (delta 177), reused 281 (delta 151), pack-reused 0
error: unable to open .git/objects/7e: Not a directory
error: unable to open .git/objects/7e: Not a directory
fatal: unable to mark recent objects
fatal: failed to run prune
$ git gc
error: unable to open .git/objects/00: Not a directory
fatal: unable to add recent objects
fatal: failed to run repack
$ git gc
Enumerating objects: 330, done.
Counting objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Delta compression using up to 24 threads
Compressing objects: 100% (139/139), done.
Writing objects: 100% (330/330), done.
Total 330 (delta 177), reused 330 (delta 177), pack-reused 0
Removing duplicate objects: 100% (256/256), done.
error: unable to open .git/objects/05: Not a directory
error: unable to open .git/objects/05: Not a directory7 -
If you come to your direct report and say “I have a problem”, their immediate reaction should be “what can I personally do to help you”. If it's not, here are some reasons why:
1. You failed to motivate them.
2. You failed to make them feel understood/relevant.
3. You made them feel like they don’t matter, failed to collect/address their feedback.
4. You punished their initiative by assigning too many tasks or otherwise.
5. You made their job more stressful than it needed to be.
6. The work process structured by you was throwing away 80% of their code as you continuously failed to communicate with the client properly.
7. You made tasks “urgent” or “urgent!!!!!”, made them work overtime to do them ASAP, and then forgot about it for two whole months, so now they feel like urgent things aren’t that urgent after all.
I’m a CTO, and I tell you that their bad performance is always your fault. Always. At the very least, you didn’t make them feel safe and comfortable enough to resign.1 -
Web code editors are shit for interviews!!
I was given a timed interview test to code on a hackerearth’s code editor. First of all I have never used hackerearth’s code editor because they suck. The problem was very simple and I cleared the round anyways when an actual human saw my code. But my point is why are programmers creating shit editors for other programmers in a timed environment. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me how the fuck I should take an input and output that in this shit editor. The code logic was ready but the test cases failed.
So Should I be learning about hackerearth’s shit code editor in an interview with a timer or should I be judged on the code logic in the specified time?
I seriously find these web code editors most of them annoying. Cause they aint good enough. You need time figuring out the tools first and then code the logic.
Usually in your job you’re gonna use the editor of your choice. Not a fucking shit fucked half arsed hackerearth code editor. My rant is for those of you if you’re taking interviews on such platforms, be there. Don’t rely on those platforms. This automated crap is still crap.4 -
I think I may be someone's wk101soon given how things are going for me.
So I get shipped over to the new offices to do some work. Initially, I was supposed to be updating SQL stored procedures.
That I can handle, well my task is now to build the skeleton project for a web API in core 2.0 using domain driven design and onion architecture which the rest of the team will use.
Okay, I don't have any experience in any of that at all. And god bless the team lead explaining some stuff to me. But it's going to take more than a 20-minute chat here and there for this stuff to sink in.
And being told just to build it how you think it should be isn't great advice when I'm trying to figure out how the systems work.
Every other API project I look at is structured completely different from one another so looking for patterns has failed.
I'm fucking stressed out every bit of information I'm getting on whats potentially happening with my job im getting second hand from people. Because I can't access my emails while off-site something I'm repeatedly flagging.
Every job advert is painstakingly making it clear how out of date my skill set is (or lack of). Evidently, I've been way too lax, and this has been a kick in the bollocks I'm not likely to forget.
If we're being evaluated on performance to see who they'll keep, then I've failed at the first hurdle.
Life lesson for those in education, don't be this knob head here and get comfortable when you land a job. Just knowing about the tech that's commonly used in your field does jack all study it.
Not a structured/meaningful rant and shits probably not as bad as I see it. I've only chewed through one fingernail after all.1 -
Can we just for a moment recognize how absolutely fucked Windows update is?
I have done everything, EVERYTHING, outside of booting from a live Linux OS and permanently deleting the windows update executables. All this to stop windows from force updating and rebooting my system while it's locked.
I've killed services, schedules, edited the registry, changed group policy. I even set my wireless connection as metered. Fun fact about that, if MS deems the update to be "priority" they'll download it anyway and reboot, so fuck your data-cap.
I wouldn't have a problem with it IF they would put everything back the way it was before, but those fucking cucks can't even be bothered with doing that. But you bet your fucking sassy ass they start up all the bullshit services I disabled last update are all running.
I don't even know WHY I even try.
Doesn't matter anyway, in a few months I won't even be able to use half the tools I use on Windows for work due to licensing issues 🤷♂️
At that point I will give a big fucking finger to Windows 🖕 and use a VM for all the fucking work related bullshit.
Fuck you Microsoft, I would say it's been fun but you're a god damned disaster. I wish that I could send a message to the entire MS board on how much they have failed, but unfortunately I rather like my freedom and it's frowned upon sending rotting roadkill in the mail.23 -
Installed on my 2x 980 TI SLI the newest Nvidia Driver 384.76.
Played games on it and some Video Editing. Noticed that I have bad laggs and checked clocks.
Wow clocks were locked at half the max Output. Checked if I can do anything to increase it, nope it's locked at half the Performance.
Tried to install previous Driver, install failed. Went 2 Drivers back and installed the 382.33.
Everything worked again.
WTF are the guys at NVIDIA coding while being drunk?? How the fuck can you lock the powertarget of the GPU at half the Performance and after 4 days not releasing a hotfix? Are they testing this shit even or forcing it into production?
Currently NVIDIA has really crappy drivers and with every update it gets even worse.
And the only option you got is GPU's from NVIDIA and AMD. And Vega is not even released yet.
Hope that AMD will beat the shit out of NVIDIA...5 -
Requests to a soap server were failing randomly. In order to contact the API provider, I tried to provide an curl example with the same payload and the error response. Yet when sending the payload over curl, the request worked just fine. When my application was building the request, it failed.
What. The. Fuck.
I checked and double-checked the request body and headers. They were identical.
Of course, no error response was returned by the API provider and, of course, they could not tell me how what error I caused in my request.
So I created a basic dummy server, installed wireshark and compared the payload when sending a request from my application and from curl to my dummy server.
It turns out: curl, if called in a certain way, automagically strips out newlines. The soap client kept them.
So that that shitty soap server crashed due to newlines in the message body!
Stripping out the newlines was rather easy.
Shame on you, your house, and entire family for letting it crash due to them!1 -
Fucking google maps JS api. One should think that a company as large as google should be capable of providing a reliable api. But this fucking api just decided for the second time in two weeks just to stop working.
After the api failed for the first time i found out that the provided url actually fetches the experimental version of the api (yes you read that correctly a fucking unstable version is the default version). To get the stable version of the api one has to add v=3 to the request. But even after adding the version the api just broke again today!
Fuck it! Google get your shit together!
Just thinking about switching to OSM...5 -
FUCK you "WP iThemes Security Pro".
First of all, your FUCKing services isn't really secure, more like security by obscurity.
Don't get me started on how you probably don't have a dedicated team of security experts.
But oh well, the customer insisted I must install you, despite my advise.
Second of all, Don't FUCKing send me emails regarding "Scheduled malware scan failed" without it containing the FUCKing error message, not some generic "http_request_failed" error, why did it FUCKing fail?
Last but not least: Don't FUCKing clutter is with with your giant ass logo that takes up half my screen or FUCKing spam such as your upcoming events, newly published books/articles, incorrect "documentation"2 -
finally picking up React JS. When setting up webpack I fucked up on the last step in the tutorial I was using which wasn't even needed it just made requiring CSS modules not need style!CSS! Infront of the file name.. everything prior was working beautifully and I was ready to start setting up React. after attempting to be more efficient I couldn't even get webpack to run and thus the test project failed to run on local host. Now to re watch bad tutorials that assume you know everything because they're still more detailed than the others I've found. :| ugh
-
A coworker, Linux fan, argued (seriously) with me today that I shouldn't run 3 distros on my laptop because I'm "such a MS fanboy".
Let's make a bet, if I can squeeze your throat by reaching it from Ur anus u lil cunt WOULD YOU FUCKING LET ME DO MY SHIT WITHOUT GIVING ME YOUR UNWORTHY OPINION YOU FUCKING FAILED ABORTION
FUCKING
MONKEY13 -
I wanted to create a messenger bot.
Time to create the bot: 15 minutes. I test it, everything works, I send request, receive response, and so on.
Time to embed it inside a messenger app: 3 fucking hours.
SERIOUSLY GUY, AND I ALSO FAILED, I DON'T UNDERSTAND A SHIT SO FUCKING MUCH BUREAUCRACY I SWEAR GETTING A VISA FOR CANADA IS 1000 TIMES EASIER.
What is a send/receive? What have I to pay for? Why I need to be a USA citizen? Why I need approval? Approval for what? Why you say I configured the app correctly if you never call the Hooker? The hell I've to do? Aaaaaaaaaa3 -
In 50% of my cases, I need to go into emergency mode and re-attempt the mounting since some partition failed to mount.
Anyone having a similar case where you need to semi-manually keep to "hit your old distro to keep running"?
Personally, I'm fine with that. Running an about 4-5 year old Manjaro installation where I did a lot with it. I see it a testament to my learned knowledge that I can keep ot running.
7 -
The feeling of preparing for an exam by reading the entire book, doing every exercise in it, doing all previous years' exams and then getting to the exam you failed and realizing.. You still have no fucking idea where to even start solving a single question in it.
Should I even bother appearing for my reexam? I feel like I wasted the past two months studying for it and there's no hope. End me or end my education, right now, thanks.25 -
This is why I don't use and will probably never use Python.
Back in the uni days, I had a very important assignment. It determined whether I was going to the fourth grade from the third or not. It involved math and charting. It was very complex, and I spent a very long time on research, naturally. I knew Python 3, and I decided to use it. The only lib I needed was matplotlib, which I installed with pip. So I did the whole thing, tested it again at home, closed my laptop and was ready to go. My laptop used Windows 7 and was set up to ignore the lid closing. When I closed it, nothing would happen, even the screen stayed on. When I arrived at the lab, I opened my laptop, hit Ctrl + B as usual… and matplotlib import wasn't working. I obviously panicked, I tried to do something about it, but it just kept throwing an import error. Reinstalling the library didn't help. My friends too weren't able to help me. It just wasn't working, and that was it.
I failed the assignment, automatically. I had nothing to show. This was the first time I failed anything in the uni. Later I rewrote the code in C++ with Qt plotting library, and everything worked fine.
I never used Python since. I did everything uni with C++, and later with JavaScript. I don't care if it was Windows error or Python's. My Windows install was clean, I reinstalled it pretty much every year and kept the default settings. My laptop was for studying purposes only, and all my personal life happened on my desktop.
I didn't use exotic things like PyPy. It was just Python 3, the most basic, official installation. If you promote your fucking language as a cross-platform solution, please be bothered to make its basic behaviour stable on the most popular OS out there.
I will probably never use Python again. Maybe this issue was addressed and fixed. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it never would've happened on Linux or Mac. I don't care. It's like maintaining friendship with a person that betrayed you. I just can't do it.
JS and NPM never failed me.6 -
Open software:
Error message: Failed to load x..
Why not tell:
Error message: Failed to load x. Please reinstall software.
or
Error message: Failed to load x. Remove cache folder located in "drive/somewhere" and try again.
or
Error message: Failed to load x. Please recreate x by using tool y and try again.
if software tells you no meaningful message and you have NO idea how to solve it.. it is one of those annoying things you have to deal with.
Why can't I just create features....4 -
After two weeks of struggling with Docker, I can confidently say, this is the worst shit I've ever worked with.
$ php bin/console make:migration
ERROR: php_network_getaddresses: getaddrinfo failed: Name or service not known
Well let's try again...
$ php bin/console make:migration
ERROR: Connection refused
Different error messages for the same commands?! FUCK YOU!!!8 -
Build failed: "CL.exe has exited with exit code 5"
Thank you Visual Studio for the detailed error report about why the build fails! I can finally fix it!
(This is not fixable by running VS as administrator, also the output file is not running nor locked by some process)2 -
Why? Why?
Of you, you were the last I've expected such failure and misery...
Not once, not twice, but I have you a chance so many fucking times...
I won't deny it, we've been through good times, done so may things together, and I admit that I'd never be able to work without you.... this codependence is just too damn fixated...
But, I think I should part ways with you, I'll visit sometimes, not just to have fun, but mostly because of work matter.
Sorry Linux, you've failed me, I'm leaving you for Windows.3 -
You know these people who want your support but do everything they could possibly do to prevent you from helping them?!
This one is about text-based support.
Basically, I told them to use a software. One guy said: "There is always an error right in the beginning when I start the app."
I ask: "What does it say?"
Another dude joins: "Yes, I get the same. Update fails or something..."
I ask: "What's the exact error message?"
Second guy: "Retrieving update failed or something similar..."
*whaaa, guess what: this is by no fucking way what I meant with "exact error message"*
Well, I ask nicely to look it up again and tell me the details.
Then, I suggest a possible solution for this abstract problem. Answer:
"No, it only happens at start."
What the fuck do you think I am? A stupid monkey who cannot read?! I know that it happens at start, that's why I suggested what I suggested! And don't think you're so intelligent to believe that deleting an update.exe in %appdata% had nothing to do with your problem. You don't have a single fucking clue how software works in its simplest manner.
What the fuck. -
TL;DR: There was a Steam bug and I fixed it locally.
Some months ago, Steam had the problem, that if you tried to add anything from the Steam Workshop to a collection, you would get an error like "Process failed: 2", while it was loading the collection list.
I realized, that it would work, but there was a bug in the JS (Watched the network tab in chrome while trying to add to collection). I searched after "Process failed" in each js file and after 30 seconds I found the buggy if. It said something like
if (json.success != 2) {
//do error
} else {
//show list
}
After I changed that if condition to
if (false)...
it worked perfectly, although it would make problems if there would be a server side error.2 -
I'm a software developer, but I'm finding myself more interested bio and electro-mechanical engineering. And to top it off, I'd most like to be a bio-mechanical engineer — which is very different from the other two previous mentions. ...But, I'm well paid now, my last retail start-up failed, and money talks. For now my fogponic ecosystem (fish + biofilter + fog + plants) in my backyard will have to suffice. Now I'm actually interested in waste recycling...
Yeah... I get bored while waiting for parts to come from China. Can never have too many hobbies.
Anyways AMA, if you like. It can be about robots, fish, plants, IoT, apps, web, solar power, 3D printing, VR... You name it! -
#define AUDIOLB_EXIT_ON_ERROR(hres) \
if (FAILED(hres)) { goto Exit; }
#define AUDIOLB_SAFE_RELEASE(punk) \
if ((punk) != NULL) \
{ (punk)->Release(); (punk) = NULL; }
Looking through old audio code I wrote. Found these macros. Will most likely reuse for a new project. It works damnit!
Do you feel lucky?!7 -
I have last few months left out of graduation and i don't know what should i learn. There's so much things (web dev , ai/ml, blockchain, android , cloud, ,hybrid apps, gaming, ar/vr, data analysis, security,etc) and as a cs student, i feel i should be knowing them all.
In last 6 years ,
Techs that i liked or got success in :
java, Android,python, data analysis, hybrid apps(flutter)
Techs that i didn't liked or failed in : ai/ml, cloud computing , webdev(css/js) ,hybrid apps(react/angular/ionic/...)
Techs that i didn't tried : security, cryptography, blockchain, open cv , ar/vr, gaming
I am not bound by my likeness or success.
My failures was mainly because i didn't liked those techs and continued further in them. And my success comprises of just launching a few apps, passing in some certification or grabbing an internship opp because of those skills.
But if you think a particular skill is necessary to have as a cs professional then let me know. I just want to earn a lot of money and get out of this mess asap1 -
How do you test unreachable code or part that is considered an edge case?
For example I catch exceptions in case IO failed and data was not written on database, but that only happens if hardware failure, or no disk space left, how do I mimic that?
I also have unreachable code for example, in one layer I fetch data (lets call it function x) and always return success result unless item not found I throw KeyNotFound exception. But in the calling function I handle the case of Status == Failed
Just in-case in the future I change function x and start returning failed status, so my logic already written but never reachable14 -
So there is this website called 100daysofrunning.in one of the worst design seen ever. They've a submit page which is another app that opens in an iframe.
If you're part of challenge, everyday you've to submit a form. Distance, time, Strava link, date and it's a pain to do so every day.
On the 50th day they restricted the date to7 days, so you cannot post data older then 7 days.
Being a programmer it would have been insult had i entered data manually.
Thanks to casperjs, meteorjs i was able to automate fetch from strava and post on this dumb page.
One day due an error, the script failed and I've missed one day of data entry. That's 2km of running gone invain and I'm out of the challenge.
Programming has mad me lazy. Screw programming. I should've been a dumb idiot to manually add data spending fkin 30 mins, atleast life would be simple. -
Okay I'm guessing everyone here has experienced something like this but...
I dev for Company A and we have various other companies and clients utilize our service. Now, a client from Company B comes to us and says that they are having problems signing in. Apparently the page just tells them "Can't sign in".
"That's odd," I think to myself, "because our failed sign-in messages aren't that terse and usually tell you why."
I look on the system, client is registered under Company B and has verified their email address. All good there. My guess? Trying to sign in to the wrong site (we have a jobs site too) because that sometimes comes up first on the googs.
We get an email from client just now: "Hi, still can't sign in. Please see screenshot below."
I shit you not, she was trying to sign in to her own company's website that clearly had "Company B" written above the sign in box.1 -
Is there any incident, which made you fall in love with programming but as well as made hate at the same time?
Mine was, when I implemented an algorithm without any prior knowledge and it worked somehow for majority test cases(which made me fall in love), but after test case changed the algorithm failed(Which made me hate myself)...2 -
I. Hate. Windows. Apps. UGH.
I may never be able to play FS2020 from the Xbox Game Pass again as... Its unable to install, gives a helpful 0x1 error code, and the help page link goes to a 404.
Now, I caused this myself... Partially... Er, no, fully, but I had a good reason!
I wanted to install something larger again and didn't have enough disk space. Fired up WinDirStat and there was a huge, like... 45 GB file in C:\Program Files\WindowsApps\Somedir\
Googling around, I found some people saying its a temp file so that Windows Store could reserve enough space for the app instalation... Okay, so... It got stuck, and I had no way to remove it?
Of course I didn't want to remove all apps of the windows market... So, I did something any *sane* person would never do - Took ownership of the whole WindowsApps and gave myself full control. Then I removed the file and... FS2020 never launched again.
I couldn't even uninstall it! It would give me no error either. It just lagged and then did nothing.
I tried resetting all the ACLs, tried giving ownership back to TrustedInstaller, nothing worked. Failed on some of the files, wtf?
Launching the game only ever told me there was an update in progress.
Tried booting a windows iso image and fix the ACLs from there, nope, also failed for the same bunch of files of FS2020. (Permission Denied while on a live image? Wow)
Last resort, I booted up Linux and tried removing the offending folders from there, only to find out that... Huh. The NTFS module labelled the offending folders as... broken links leading to an "unsupported reparse point". But hey, it let me remove it at least.
Since then, it no longer appeared as installed, but... Now, anytime I want to install it, it just throws an error 0x00000001 with no further details.
So yeah, I know I caused this myself, but after fiddling with the permissions and ACLs and NTFS dark magic, I feel justified in saying - Fuck you WindowsApps DRM.4 -
Been trying to install myself a gentoo but it's been more like the mode of broken packages than the godmode of Linux... I mean I see that some packages break if I am trying to compile via musl (not fully supported yet) or via uclibc. But please. CAN'T YOU JUST FUCKING TEST THE PACKAGES BEFORE PUSHING TO LIVE? Seriously. I just wanna install a system with i3 and lightdm for the first. But do you think I could build even the first 20 packages WITHOUT A FUCKING ERROR MESSAGE?! FUCK NO. I mean it's a clean install - nothing should be blocking - let's wait a day.
*one day later*
Fuck. Shit doesn't work now either.
*gets himself a new tarball*
Wow now it works.... Or not. 4 packages later it failed again. And like that it continues.
Gentoo isn't even running on that new software. BUT IT STILL WON'T BUILD ANYTHING TO EVEN LET ME CONTINUE BUILDING A FUCKING KERNEL AND SETTING THAT SHIT UP.
Now I am totally frustrated - deleted my efivars once because I forgot to unmount /sys from the Chroot - after a few days of trying. I tell myself: Why not just arch? It always worked.
Okay then reboot to windows and get an arch-livesystem.... If only my Windows didn't boot entry disappear again. -
Atlassian needs improvement!
Screenshot from the Jira "Accessibility" settings page where I hoped to find a dark mode switch.
When I wanted to send them feedback about the settings page, the feedback form failed, cluttering vintage style error messages with poor UX writing all over the page.
> Help us improve!
>
> We’d love to hear more about your experience with the new accessibility settings in Jira. Any thoughts on what you liked and where we could improve are more than welcome.
> Oops! Something went wrong...
>
> There was a problem submitting your feedback, likely due to the configuration of this form. You might want to contact the site owner to let them know about this issue.
P.S. Thinking of accessibility: there is not way to enter an ALT text to image uploads on devrant? seriously?
6 -
So I've been a professional software developer in variously named roles over the years since I was 18, now 35. I've had many ideas for my own projects over the years some great, some not so great, and as with most ideas, if you don't act on them, someone else will suddenly come up with it, which is frustrating as hell obviously. Anyway, I never find enough time to do these things in what little free time I have, so the idea of stopping working for someone else and work on my own stuff seems almost unobtainable. I've worked with companies (startups) that have had ideas that have never made anything significant but still keep going on investor money for some reason or another. I realise my question is quite vague, but how the fuck do you break away and do your own stuff? Time is running out (at least in my mind), anyone here actually done it, succeeded, failed?? Can't be writing other people's badly designed software my whole life, would be nice to design my own and see it through.10
-
WTF?
TL;DR Integration between software failed so hard I lost 20% of my progress in one hit. Yay! /s
I, being a Fool, signed up to do NaNoWriMo this year (50k words in 30 days of November). I've won it before, and failed it before, and this year was especially stupid as I've got a bigger pile on my plate than usual, what with getting as quickly up to speed on c# and React as I can in prep for starting the new job in December.
I started on a high - 4k on day one, woohoo! To my delight, my writing software Scrivener now had an integration feature to let you update your total word count straight to your account instead of manually entering it. I added my credentials, hit the button, refreshed the page, all updated. So far so good.
Then, on day two, I wrote 1700-ish words. Still good, well ahead of target, took me over 5k. Updated through Scrivener, checked it updated the site, still good.
Then, yesterday, I logged in and added a tiny tiny number of words (brain went blah), and was horrified to discover it had taken 1900 words off my count!
Cue panic as I frantically searched for the missing words, trying to find any evidence of where they'd gone. Gave up after half an hour of futility, bashed out enough to squeak back over 5k, confirmed it had updated.
I'm not unfamiliar with the general stupidity most organisations have on integration - they don't have it, or it's an afterthought, or it's just plain terrible - but this was a ridiculously simple thing to do, I'd have thought? Passing one fucking number and some date/time tracking?
This is what I get for trying to do too many things at once, I guess! -
What the fuck is wrong with npm/react-native??!?😡😡
I completed a part of a project last week, worked well, then I cloned the repo today and It returns BUILD FAILED,
WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO YOU SATAN?!😡1 -
Why are the damned Spaniards so small? Because of them I am unable to sit in the newer trains that go around the Netherlands. The angled headrests (they are supposed to kinda wrap around the head). But these headrests start below my shoulders and my head then floats above the headrest. This causes my shoulders to be folded together.
FU you spaniards (no offense to everyone who didn't design trains), if you can't take in consideration what the average length of the users is you have failed as a product designer.
Yes I am tall (1.95m) but not really above average around here (maybe a cm or so)18 -
!dev
my problem with gaming in linux is not really inherent to linux.
my problem is that there are no linux game torrents.
and torrenting for me is a way to know if I'll be playing a certain game for a while, and eventually buy it.
I can watch all the trailers in the world for a game, but I truly make up my mind after the first few hours of direct playtime.
so I'm not interested in spending money on a game that I might like because it looked nice on the trailer only to find out I hate playing it.
the problem with torrents is that once users get the game, and the game works, they're probably like
"why bother buying it? the game works right? why risk losing the progress i achieved so far by moving save files?"
on top of that on linux, you need to check protondb to see how compatible the game you found is, so an extra layer of difficulty.
I guess I would like to have legal demo versions of games, but I see very little devs doing that so maybe that commercial model failed? I don't know really.16 -
I went to walgreens website on my phone.
First it is dog ass slow. Really you targetted phones and you make it shitty?
Then I tried hitting "contact us". When I do this it opens up the product page with some random search inserted.
All I wanted was a local phone number for pharmacy. I failed to get a number.2 -
holy shit I swear taxes are like the government trying to tell you you're a peasant to them
my medicare card is about to expire and FOR SOME REASON now the process to renew is a fucking interrogation about various documentation the government has given you. before it was just your damned name, date of birth, and a new photo for the card.
evidently they were supposed to send you snail mail 3 months before expiration. evidently also the only way to renew is get this said snail mail.
and evidently I have to go through this "catchall" change your address with everything in the government process
which is a little ironic
because
to use this service you need to give them something called a notice of assessment, which is when the government accepts your taxes they send you back one of those
well I haven't had access to my tax portal for years. I keep filing them and getting excess money back but I can't actually see any of my returns.
so I tried this time
12 pages of verification and more verification... you do one step, it says wrong info because if you have to write in 2,474 well turns out the , fucks it up and your info doesn't match what's on file and if you fail more than 3 times you'll be locked out. repeat. page after page. how many fucking pages are there? what format are they expecting? nobody fucking knows. you'll get to find out if you pass just this one more!
after about 4 hours of this shit
and they have 2 factor authorization now?! wtf.
then this next step is id verification or we snail mail you a code (WHICH AGAIN IS IRONIC)
I chose id. health card doesn't count, it notifies me later. thankfully I have a passport. bad news, passport expires this September so guess who is gonna be having more fun later
the app of course can't use my camera in the browser I have, so I start downloading fucking other browsers and finally hit one that works
also they lied. they also want a selfie. then it tells me I failed to look like myself. if you fail to look like yourself 3 times you are denied.
ok. so I try snail mail. the page says if I revoke consent to id I can go do the snail mailed code. they lied. if you revoke consent it exits the whole wizard. you enter all the verification steps again.
I try to get them to snail mail me the code. they want some basic info they asked me like 16 times now, and a postal code. ironic. well this is the tax people, so by this point I found all my previous sent in tax returns (though I can't access the government's replies). checked. yep. address all the same. put in the postal code. nope. somehow it's wrong. 3 times I put all this random info in in different ways. 5 times and I'm locked out.
now fucking what.
THE FUCKING IRONY OF
I NEED TO CHANGE WHERE I LIVE SO YOU CAN SNAIL MAIL ME SOMETHING
AND TO CHANGE WHERE I LIVE I HAVE TO CONFIRM WHERE I LIVE SO YOU CAN SNAIL MAIL ME SOMETHING FUCKING ELSE
the government just fucking dunks on you
guess we're all not having fucking medical cards anymore. all we do is pay taxes, and can't even see the paperwork to those taxes we pay.16 -
Dear Windows,
you done fucked it up!
I had a god damnit run, finishing the last mammoth task of our sprint.
Then, i decided to take a 3 minutes bio break.
Came back to my machine just to realise that this little OS bitch sneaked up on me, used the few seconds of my break to do a unholy, reboot of doom and damnation.
As a result, my virtual machine dropped it's php-storm settings...
I lost my precious focus on the task and my last nerves to figure out the correct settings again.
To cut a long story short.
We missed the aim of the Sprint.
The Sprint failed and i got a half-baked module.
At least, all the complicated businesslogic is proper covered by unittests.2 -
Wasted 8 hours today trying to convince Windows to boot.
Yesterday I deleted two unused partitions. Today no OS booted up. Guess what, diskpart (think parted for Windows) reindexes GPT partitions on any modification. So when I deleted partition #1, my EFI System Partition, previously #2, became #1. But UEFI was still trying to boot from partition #2.
Linux booted after recreating UEFI boot entry. 1 minute job, no tools required. Windows, though... Bootrec /rebuildbcd failed, bcdedit failed, recreating ESP from scratch failed spectacularly. Finally I made a clean install just to get proper ESP and restored OS from backup.
Dammit, Windows. Why do you have to make things that hard.4 -
Little addition on my rant about the enter and leave instructions being better than push mov sub for stackframes:
I had that debate with a friend of mine, who tried the same code ... and failed to get enter to be as fast. Infact, for him, enter was twice as slow, on his older computer even 3times as slow.
Mhh... pretty bad. basically blows up my whole point.
I tried the code on my computer... Can't reproduce the error.
Weird.
"Which CPU are you on?"
>"I'm on Intel"
Both of his computers are on intel. I use an amd ryzeni1600. Now this might be a bit of a fast conclusion, but I think that its safe to say that intel should atleast do better for SOME parts of their CPUs.9 -
Out of the Operating Systems, I think Windows has the best file moving system.
Yes, you're unable to transfer files if they're currently in use, but you can start new file moving jobs in the middle of a current file moving process, and as of Windows 7, files that are unable to be moved for whatever reason don't cancel out the entire move.
Linux is next best because files will move regardless of if they're in use or not, and a file that is unable to be moved for whatever reason also won't cancel the entire move. However, if a new file move process is started, it will pause until the current move job is completed, which is a pain if moving a lot of large files.
Mac is the worst. One failed move results in cancelling the entire process. If a file will be duplicated or is unable to be moved, if you cancel that specific move, you have to start it all over again. No way to cancel or skip, just start it all over.4 -
At work I help manage a fleet of Apple hardware that acts as our iOS build pipeline, and today I tested out MacOS Sonoma on one of the build nodes. The update went fine, but the test build failed because it didn't have sudo access for a specific command. I looked into it a little more, and it appears that the update set the sudoers file back to default! Like, why would you do that? Why would you mess with a configuration like that just for an OS update? It doesn't make any sense to me, and now I'll have to go and fix each sudoers file manually after I update the rest of the nodes. So, thanks Apple.3
-
Telling a web developer to use Divi, WP Bakery, or any similar WordPress page builder is like forcing a plumber to use your little kid's kindergarten toy tools to rebuild your bathroom.
Those tools don't even work! Divi: "your save has failed". Bakery: saving an element's styles will randomly mess up the whole WYSIWYG page preview. Gutenberg: you can write HTML, but I won't accept it. Let's attempt block recovery so I can destroy it completely.
It feels like trying to use PowerPoint to develop a website. Who's the target audience of this kind of crapware and how are they supposed to use it?1 -
My work network AD password has to be changed every 90 days or so and it is really getting to me now. I'm beginning to run out of passwords to use and may soon have to resort to writing them down on a piece of paper and lock it somewhere.
I get why we need to change it often. What I don't like is the stupid validation rules AD uses to check passwords. It doesn't allow variations and you have to use something completely new.
I have only been in the job for about 8 months and I have had a nightmare experience updating my password recently as the synchronisation failed and I was locked out of my accounts for a day or 2 rendering my useless and having to call support for help.
How the he'll am I supposed to remember my passwords when I have to change them that often!!!18 -
I thought: Okay lets update this open source software the day right before my exam. What could go wrong? All previous updates worked without a problem and this is an urgent security fix for RCX.
Of course: It failed. I spend the whole night searching for the error in my config files etc. The error was: A missing null check in start sequence. Had to fix and build it myself as I required the files stored there for the exam.
I learned a lot that day/night about updating only when you have the time to deal with errors... -
I wish I could get our technical lead fired for incompetence. No transparency about deadlines (it's always "Oh and we need it today"), always overpromises to business ("I told them you can deliver this in two days" - we estimated a week's worth of work), and she never documents anything except through email (she never uses Jira, which we use for our task logging - we end up creating the tickets ourselves, which she never reads or updates either when there are blockers she needs to address).
Dozens of retrospectives later trying to find a solution to her poor organizational skills have failed to produce anything remotely close to an answer. She just stubbornly refuses to change or improve. I'm at my wits' end just dealing with this on a daily basis to the point I can't wait to clock out and go home.
It's a Friday tomorrow. I intend to slack off and just put in a couple hours of work because fuck her and fuck this company and its inability to fix itself.1 -
ImgBurn has one of the weirdest sounds ever..
-job completed- Some kind of funny instruments jingling
-job failed- Sexy woman voice: "Oh no! :("
-you press 'stop job' more than once'- Sexy woman voice: "Hey! I said I got it!"
Lmfao.. -
From a little bit heated discussion I want to extract this: One big pain in the ass is the human to computer interface. Maybe it's the natural vs. formal language divide, but there's a mismatch deeper than between object and relational models that no ORM can failingly fix.
The whole point of the discussion was on such a point where some wanted an interface more human friendly and I stubbornly insisted on the way it is simple for the computer system. Like not too much human messiness should invade machine. One argument sounded as if human words were like unicode code points which meaning doesn't depend on its representation.
That's raising red flags to me: Nonono, natural language is too messy, keep it out. This poor machine could have been so clean and well designed and we already stacked up so much entropy we still dare to call OS,..
Dunno, what's your stance? Still hoping that your shell one day will be able to process our poor standard English? Or do you think, like me, all those failed attempts show there's a gap you should not even touch?5 -
> systemctl enable --user pocketbase
> Failed to enable unit: Unit file pocketbase.service does not exist.
> Cat into ~/.config/systemd/user/pocketbase.service
> File exists.
Thanks for confirming you are shit systemd. I would love to see this happen in OpenRC or any sysv-like rc for that matter.
Fucking morons on a stick5 -
Haha fuckers fucking hell! Last post was about Factorio not starting. Guess what. My hard drive failed. Fuck. Razer wanted to wipe the computer to fix the rattling noise inside. I told them fuck off you should be able to fix it anyways. Guess they might as well wipe it all clean now...1
-
What is your opinion about courses?
I got into the world of development from the world of Sysadmining and security with 10 month long Java course and now doing web courses in my free time.
I feel this really helped me, as before I tried to learn completely by myself but failed. Now I feel much more confident learning by myself(albeit I still feel Noobish as fuck)
How did you learn? Did you take courses? Completely by yourself? Through work?4 -
I took a hakerRank challenge for an interview, I failed miserably.
All challenges included subsequences and I just kept reaching memory limit... My algorithm gets the answer, if just takes forever if the input is too large.
So fuck stupid me.
I am now googling about it but can not find something that explains it clear (in my opinion)
Would appreciate if you guys can recommend some resources.2 -
Some time ago, when exactly the fuck I don't quite remember and promise I never will unless just the right amount of ass is provided in a timely fashion, I start going about how I want to work on some utils to make writing prompts easier.
What I do remember and will remind you with strongly renewed vigor is the fact that I signed a legally-binding document to grant the general public a full pardon for my own ritualistic assassination should I ever use the term "prompt-engineering" unironically.
This pact still holds, and were I to break my solemn oath, then I will hold you fully accountable every single second I find myself still breathing.
Anyhoo, today was the first test of my resolve, for I have implemented both the stupid preprocessor and the local database prototype that allows it to fetch long ass definitions from disk, and both have been published (main: https://github.com/Liebranca/...).
I must admit to you all that though I have not failed, I felt weakness for a second when filling out tags in the repo description, as only "prompt-engineering" was recognized as a legit tag, and not "prompt-writing". In that moment, I almost gave in to temptation, as the accursed Satan whispered in my ear, appealing to my desire for recognition.
However, I reminded this ill buttrape daemon that their fate lies in the burning fires of hell, and as a result was allowed to resist it's alluring diabolical seduction. And for not giving in to greed, I have kept my life, my honor, and my anal virginity.
Also I wrote *some* documentation, it's shit but it's something.12 -
When people say they wish a language was more strict. I'm a fan of the loose lol.
Tried Python. Script failed due to indent not at right amount. Bye
C#/.NET... Typecasting out the a$$. Goodbye lol
PHP. Anything goes. Hello, this is my kind of world. Never had an issue with types but I write my code to handle values properly.
And I know people will have opposing views. However I will say that you can still achieve the strictness in PHP by putting in your own checks. Create a few custom functions to do your validations and you are good to go :)3 -
When the way to get a promotion at your company is so bullshit and you need to do a lot of things collectively, but even then you work towards each of those things and ensure you have enough backing of each one, after getting feedback from your manager from the previous session on what type of things would apply, only to then get told manager failed to promote few other people because the higher ups want even more bullshit things and thus he wants even more from you at the same level.
Time to see if any company would take me, before I wanted some salary boost but I might just take one for very small boost as compared to what I wanted before. -
!rant
Question to the devs that hire.
Would you hire a developer with the qualifications:
- knows multiple programming languages (can be any but knows them well)
- has worked the past 6 years in the field however worked during his school life.
- started of career in web development and worked with high end clients, (big corps, businesses, celebs)
- does not have a CS or Engineering Degree (has a different degree that is remotely related)
- has failed his A Level exams (pre-college, high school board exams by Cambridge) (not that this matters)
Disclaimer: This is not about me. I was in an argument with my extended family about the importance of grade school education in work. My family consists of Teachers and School Administrators entirely. The above point all define me and I was successful enough to earn more than what my family does early on when joining college. I did however fail my alevels only to get a scholarship in a great University for my field.5 -
So I just failed my maths exam.
Nothing more to say except all other courses have way way better grades than my course.
So my teach's got two courses and both of them massively fucked up, course average (both) 4.5-5.6 (d- - f).
All other courses are just Soo way better that I just can't believe that fault is only on the student side here.
And to top it off, this scenario is not new at all.
Had the same shit with our courses failing unlike the others anothet time too.
FUCK YOU FR. NIELEN4 -
When you work in a hotel and your coleuges can't open exel files and you show them libre office and they all look at you as a computer god.
I failed IT twice... -
Hey Guys!
Hope to find some help here. So i got a MacBook Pro (2015) from my Workplace and upgraded it to High Sierra. I set everything up and it worked fine untill i did some User configurations. I couldnt access the Settings in preferences because my password was wrong (it wasnt really, but it didnt accept it). So i thought reinstalling would help. I did the reinstall process but got an error at the end of it. “Could not create a reboot partition”. I don’t remember the message exactly. So I have tried several things and hope someone can give me a hint.
- reinstall via cmd + r -> failed
- made a time machine backup from my private MacBook (High Sierra) and put it in my work MacBook -> failed
- recovery from internet -> failed
- external drive with High Sierra installer and booting it from there -> failed
Hope you guys have a clue what to do. Thank you :).8 -
I pride myself on not being a nerd. I can communicate with customers and I don't dismiss aesthetics, marketing, delivery dates, and legal considerations as completely inconsistent and arbitrary.
But still, when clients complain about my predecessors, I start to feel for them and imagine when past developers
- preferred to rewrite the legacy system
- were reluctant to use Microsoft software
- needed much more time than estimated
- and failed to understand implicit requirements.
I know that there are a lot of developers in the world, but you need a decent or good one who is available and willing to work on your project.
As (web) developers, we should behave more like craftspeople, stay calm, and ignore entitled clients' and managers' moods and micro-management attempts unless there's really a critical issue.13 -
Me: Working on trying to salvage our shitty project
PM: EMAILS ARN'T BEING SENT FOR OUR TEST ENVIRONMENTS
Me: Ohkay.. Is it urgent? I fixed it last time.. Seems like the other devs broke it.
PM: YES WE NEED TO PASS ALL OUR TEST CASES ASAP
Me: Well maybe it should be failed if it keeps breaking all the time..
PM: SEND ME AN EMAIL WITH WHAT YOU CHECKED AND OVERNIGHT YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT WITH OUR TERRIBLE OFFSHORE TEAM
Me: uhm... Ok
Also me:
2 -
A philosophical question about maintenance/updating.
There is no need to repeat the reasons we need to update our dependencies and our code. We know them/ especially regarding the security issues.
The real question is , "is that indicates a failure of automation"?
When i started thinking about code, and when also was a kid and saw all these sci fi universes with robots etc, the obvious thing was that you build an automation to do the job without having to work with it anymore. There is no meaning on automate something that need constant work above it.
When you have a car, you usually do not upgrade it all the time, you do some things of maintance (oil, tires) but it keeps your work on it in a logical amount.
A better example is the abacus, a calculating device which you know it works as it works.
A promise of functional programming is that because you are based on algebraic principles you do not have to worry so much about your code, you know it will doing the logical thing it supposed to do.
Unix philosophy made software that has been "updated" so little compared to all these modern apps.
Coding, because of its changeable nature is the first victim of the humans nature unsatisfying.
Modern software industry has so much of techniques and principles (solid, liquid, patterns, testing that that the air is air) and still needs so many developers to work on a project.
I know that you will blame the market needs (you cannot understand the need from the start, you have to do it agile) but i think that this is also a part of a problem .
Old devices evolved at much more slow pace. Radio was radio, and still a radio do its basic functionality the same war (the upgrades were only some memory functionalities like save your beloved frequencies and screen messages).
Although all answers are valid, i still feel, that we have failed. We have failed so much. The dream of being a programmer is to build something, bring you money or satisfaction, and you are bored so you build something completely new.13 -
I think i came up with the ultimate captcha. A gif that displays four numbers, one by one in current position. There's always one number displayed. I do not think that AI can recognize it without some nasty adjustments while it's very clear for humans. A while ago I had to do a captcha with six questions and failed it a few times. Wtf.
The site I'm working on will have this captcha soon. I make a microservice in C that will create a captcha equal to the last url parameter, the four digit number. By giving the number yourself as parameter you know what to validate with later at post. I probably include the answer hashed with some salt in a hidden field to compare answer with so it works if you have two tabs open20 -
Not really dev related but here it goes:
Decided to update some apps on my phone during lecture. Suddenly android crashes and is stuck in a bootloop. Went to safe mode where "downloaded" apps are disabled but wanted to at least be available via telegram. So I followed a guide to manually convert an app to a system app and tested with some random app that I didn't care for. That worked flawlessly and then decided to proceed with telegram but it said that moving failed but actually the folder was moved. I took the chance and rebooted (again to safe mode) only to find out that now the system ui crashes as soon as it loads, also rendering the safe mode useless.
Great that such things always happen when you don't have access to a trusted machine with adb installed. -
Just failed a technical screening. I had never had one. Basically was asked to create an ass-backward version of of .filter() and couldn't understand what was going on. Figured it out 30 min later, but still confused why anyone would want it written that way. Humble times. I will attain you, knowledge!
-
And here it comes bois, the famous Monday Morning Mumbling is back, for everyone's pleasure.
Do you remember your uni years, when you had wonderful coding lessons, and you learned sick languages ?
I do aswell, since I'm still in uni.
But why, WHY, IN ALL OF GOD THOUGHTS, DO I STILL HAVE TO TAKE MATHS LESSONS ?
It's my fourth fucking uni year, and I'm still supposed to deal with math lessons which are about what I learned 6 years ago. And guess what ? I still failed the test since I fucking don't understand a single shit in maths.
"Uuuuh if yu wan tu derivate a function u hav to multiply ur derivated function basic expression with the derivate itself lul xDDD so funi"
FUCK OFF DUDES I DON'T GIVE A SINGLE SICK BIRD SHIT ABOUT MATHS. I WASTED THREE YEARS OF MY LIFE LEARNING ABOUT BINARY TREES, MATHEMATICALS WAYS OF SPILLING YOUR CEREAL BOWL WHEN YOU HAVE TO LEAVE IN FIVE MINUTES, NUMERIC WAY OF OPTIMIZE YOUR SINK SPACE WHEN YOU'RE TOO LAZY TO DO THE DISHES, JUST LET ME FUCKING WRITE CODE INSTEAD OF ANNOYING ME WITH UNEXPLAINABLE MATHS SHIT NOW !
I know maths are important, okay ? But I'm so fucking tired of learning this shit again and again and still failing those shitty tests where they only give you maths problems without any other goal than messing with your grades.
Fuck this shit I'm pissed off on so many levels, I wasted tons of money on a private school to enhance my résumé history, and now I'm stuck with some strange "f'(x)" boi that will ruin my year.
RT's appreciated, if you recognised yourself in this story, don't forget to send some biscuits to my postal address.
TL;DR : Why wasting your time on theoritical lessons when you could use your time to learn new dynamic technos, like C++98 ?2 -
Workflow? More like chasing answer from a community that is not, and never has been, famous for its pedagogical skills. So hand me some coffee, weed and/or some snacks because I'll still search high and low, skip sleep and build up a few hundred pages browsing history so that in the end, I'll reach the understanding I'm looking for anyways. Even if whatever person trying to help me - in their delusion that I already know everything, except for that thing I'm asking about of course - really, REALLY just failed at saying "that goes there because of that" instead of "did you try insertSomeAppropriateRandomNameOfAThingYouAssumeEveryoneKnowsHere..?".
But who am I kidding? The tools are better than ever (IDE'S). The pedagogical skills are getting its own arenas to build on and its coming along greatly (coding block apps, treehouse and the likes etc. etc).
And no matter the struggle, I can't escape that I love coding and learning more than anything else.
Now how do I.. Where.. When.. Why the.. -
Using AWS S3 web ui to copy a big folder from one to another and in the middle of copying, I got a pop up that your session has expired please refresh the page and task failed because of this.
What kind of security is this ? Can you check if any task is currently running.
Second who uses browser alert these days... wasted my one hour.7 -
bitbucket you slow fucking sack of shit, we've confirmed with our remote team members that other people on other networks have it slow as shit too
I really wish we could convince our team to migrate to gitlab or github instead
can't tell if it failed to find the pull request associated with certain commits because it's slow a shit, shit (because it's atlassian bitbucket) or both
there is the small chance that maybe it's just the shit telecom industry in this country too on top of it, but things were acceptable before -
I'm feeling guilty.
I've a lot of fun hearing the flautolence wich comes out from the mouth of my brain farters collegues in my university. I usually fake being a mediocre student who never worked nor programmed anything else except the stupid exercises related to the exams. Yesterday a collegue come out saying: WOAH, YOU'RE USING LINUX!
Good, nice deduction my dear Sherlock.
The best had to come.
The genius decided to mocks me up telling: YOU KNOW IF YOU TYPE sudo rm -rf / IN THE CMD YOU MAKE YOUR COMPUTER FASTER?
Before I processed that he's not serious i answered "no, rm just remov..." and I saw the beaten look in his eyes because the joke misersbly failed. So i proceeded: "hahaha, fun. Anyway i could rm -undo to fix the mess".
As soon i finished the sentence he ran on him laptop and boots up the VM to try... -
when u exhausted your playlists and wanted a new one but failed to scour through all these useless pop songs.
ranters, i would appreciate it if you can give me great playlists for in-the-zone times. what gets you pumping, or focused.5 -
Hey my bros. I’m trying to create a simple messenger bot just for fun using this tutorial:
https://medium.com/crowdbotics/...
But it seems that I’m kinda stuck with setting up the webhook on the fb page, it displays an error
“the url couldn’t be validated, callback verification failed...”
I googled for answers but it seems that it doesn’t work for me. Can you please help me? Thank you so much.4 -
I needed to send feedback through email, so I use thunderbird as my default email client, and as soon as I hit the send button, the message failed to send, where then I’m prompted to login to my gmail account on my computer.
Hey google, go fuck yourself. Gmail on computer is a fucking piece of trash. If you had not shut down inbox just yet, then I would use that. Gmail takes like over 40 seconds to load on my computer, which is why I use thunderbird because of that. I refuse to use your horrible piece of trash website and now you want me to login again. Seriously just fuck you.
Also, I’ve been getting Chinese spam in my main inbox rather than in the spam folder ever since this COVID/coronavirus shit started. Know any better choices? I would like something that is free, as long as they don’t have an affiliation and/or partnership with google.2 -
I usually don't get into competition, you know, because I don't feel that anyone needs to judge me the way I do what I do,
But I gave myself a competition to earn that gold 🏅 medal half way through my cs course, and now I've come to know that I've miserably failed,
> I feel a little depressed
> I feel a lot sad
> I want to get drunk but I can't, I live in dry state
To be really honest, I wanted to earn this medal to get some recognition, I want to cry really really hard but then what's the point
On the positive side I've got a job now, so that's there -
Hello, instead of my usual nihilistic fuckery, I actually have a question that you guys may be able to answer.
When uploading images in Chrome this morning I got the two prompts pictured below. One is in google voice, the other is in gmail. I searched online for answers but oddly enough there is nothing satisfactory.
The promp is 'upload failed server rejected.' This problem goes back as far as 2012, but today it happened to me for the first time. Thank you
3 -
Me and @asafniv cannot settle this argument and we need your conclusion.
What syntax makes more sense, Objective-C or Swift?
In my opinion, Swift's syntax is better than Objective-C, but Asaf's opinion the the opposite.
We failed to settle this argument and that is why we need YOU to give us your opinion.
In the comments I will send 2 identical functions, one is written in Objective-C, and one is written in Swift.17 -
As my plan A for education/training failed horribly around two years ago(as it turns out, you can be too big for fun rides like commercial airliners), and as it is my currently working plan B, i guess it gave me new opportunities and will hopefully help me afford food in the near future. It also made me a lot more cynical, but i do not know if there is a distinct connection between coding and cynicism.
-
Another disaster of 2020 had struck.
The internet is fucked again. This time of a global scale. Did you grow a bit suspicious why everything takes more to load? USA is getting ddosed by china again... I get dns proube failed error on every website and things that work are as fast as that inter your company have hired for thag cobol project from 1876. I have a online test tomorrow, usa can you fucking get ddosed later?
Yep and the attack is currently shown on the famous ddos graph web site2 -
Hey DevRant Fam!, hope everyone is very well,I just started using exercism with python inside my chosen editor Emacs, and well... the first problem i'm doing is the Hello World problem...
So the code i have is here:
def hello(name='world!'):
return "Hello, {0}".format(name)
hello()
and it prints out the output "Hello,World!"
but i'm getting a strange error in my command prompt saying something like this '1 Failed Assertion error None != 'Hello, World!'
anyone have some advice its my first time working with Exercism :-) cheers!
Thank you :-)13 -
I just commented a test so the PR passes and the feature reaches next release; I can't fix it (Damn react testing library tests)
but after that, the linter failed for the same PR, so I just fixed it and did a git push -f
I guess once you cross the line you cannot come back
feel my pain1 -
Playing Minecraft 1.12.1 on my private server, everything going fine. Time for lunch, I close the game and come back later.
Restart the game, try to connect to my server again:
"Failed to connect to server
java.lang.NullPointerException: group"
Won't connect anymore now.
WTF is wrong with you???3 -
Learning C# coming from Java...
What's the fuss about properties? As i see it, theyre only usefull for binding, as else they just work as syntetic sugar instead of getter/setter methods.
But properties are also limited to give response back, like a successfull set, unless you start throwing exceptions..
And if a set property has if(age>5){this.age=age} then if i pass the property a 4, you will never know as a user that it failed (again, unless you start throwing exceptions)
Im kinda feeling like i want to use get/set methods until i need to bind, then of course use property ?? Am i all off here?25 -
YOU ARE A FOOL, BY USING VISUAL STUDIO CODE!!!
Hating Microsoft is not about how bad is this or that feature because they failed in making it responsive, neither should it be blessed for its new outstanding opensource projects.
Microsoft is a marketing company, they don't have new ideas, breakthrough projects, inventions... no, they just copy the market and make/buy their own replicate of the trending services.
THAT IS SLOWING THE PROGRESS OF SCIENCE AND HUMAN IMPROVEMENT ITSELF.
Microsoft is just using the cold comfort of today instead of making a change but is also destroying the bright, enthusiastic, but poor brains of the modern society.
You are fool by using Visual Code, you are a manipulated sheep, a slut which innevitable follows the propaganda of the enemy of progress.
I an not going to stand here and support my enemy, I delete Visual Code.35 -
Okay, so a bit of context. I got this AWS credit as some kind of reward for participating in some startup hackathon. Okay no big deal, Imma just redeem it on my personal AWS account and load up some EC2 instances for my bois to stage stuffs up there. No big deal
Until the fucking credit expire. Normally you guys would think AWS would be professional and send some kind of email about the about-to-be-expired credit but fuck no. They decide to be a cunt and start piling charges on my debit card instead.
Unlucky for them because I, being sensible, didn't put too much money in the debit account. The cunts at AWS tried to charge me but they failed.
Guess what motherfuckers, I've just changed my payment method and lock my cash just in case. Ban my account, I don't care, I don't really use it that much anyway, you won't get another penny from me.
Fucking capitalist pigs1 -
i wonder... when I'm using Share-it to share the apk file of my android project, it is always failed to install to the mobile that i'd shared. you guys encounter that?
-
Started attending a fairly well-known college online a few months ago. I'm not an expert in programming (ironically what I'm going for) but I know bugs when I see them, and holy sh*t does their learning environment have bugs. Everything from failed automatic posts to failed link embeds. Even their assessment site will lead you to a colorful error page. Clearly reputation isn't everything.
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