Random : Hey you're a programmer right?

Me : Yeah? *excited about possibilities*

Random : I am having troubles installing a game I downloaded. I've been trying for three weeks now.

Me : *sigh* OK, I'll have a look, but I can't guarantee I'll get it right.

*Spend about 10 seconds installing game.*

Random : How did you do that?

Me : I read the error message, it was pointing to the wrong file.

Random : You are a god man *calls wife* come look at this genius. *calls daughter* look at that *calls dog* this guy is so amazing.

I also now avoid Random, he had three hard drives, each with a different version of Windows installed, he totally screwed his bios, he admitted not having put thermal paste on his cpu. And he asked me to fix all of this whenever I have time.

I am not your computer fixer guy. Take It to the shop.

Uncle: "It must be noisy, programming. I've seen a datacenter on TV, and those computers are loud" — "It is noisy, but that's more my coworkers fault"

Sales guy at the office: "So you see patterns in the code, you can read this cryptic mess?" — "Uh this is PHP, Its not the syntax that makes it hard to read, it's the dimwit who wrote it"

Father-in-law: "Could you reprogram my laptop, I got a virus trying to download por... nature documentaries" — "I'm not that kind of doctor"

Mother-in-law: "How will you sustain a family, you just play video games all day" — "I make your monthly teachers salary in four days"

Girlfriend: "I learned some Lua today because I needed a world of warcraft extension for..." — "I love you too"

Coworker in my team recently said to boss:

"Thanks, this conversation with you has taught me so much about single-threaded blocking I/O"

Some random PR comments from our company's repository:

"Are you insured? I hope you are insured"

"Learning git is not that difficult. You only need one command: git reset --hard"

*Link to amazon for dog poop bags*
"Please clean up your shit, before I step in it"

"Have you thought about a career in sales? At least there you might sell your bullshit"

Friend: Hey, can you fix my laptop? The hard drive is almost full.

Me: (Looking through his folders) Maybe it's because of this. Why do you have 3000+ files in your downloads folder? Maybe I should delete some of this.

Friend: No no, please don't touch the downloads folder, I have some very important documents there.

Me: Why don't you move them to a separate folder then? You should organize the ones you actually need and delete the rest. This folder is a complete mess.

Friend: No no, the problem is not the downloads folder, there must be something else. Can't you just uninstall some programs to free up space?

Me: I could, but I don't know which ones you actually use.

Friend: What? You should know!! You studied computer science for this!!

Me: First of all, there is not a single class in the whole 4 years of university called "How to uninstall programs and free up space on 128GB hard drives of shitty €400 computers". Second of all, I don't know why you were expecting me to find a magic button on your laptop that immediately frees up all the space in a hard drive without actually deleting anything. That's not how computers work, you know.

Friend: Hey if you didn't want to help me you could have said so in the first place.

Me: FML

Not only in my work, but in my life.

My biggest inspiration is the popcorn seller that patiently stays outside the subway exit, standing, every fucking day, from 4-5pm until 0-2am.

He stays until after the subway closes, and only leaves after everyone waiting for their Uber or their ride do.

In the rainiest day of the year, he was there.
In the coldest day of the year, he was there.
In the worst crisis of our country in the last decades, the region became temporarily infested by bandits and beggars. Sometimes I had to work overtime until 11:30pm and I had to be very cautious with all the robbers in the empty dark street. But guess who was there, sometimes calmly saying "get out, go work" to the bad elements bothering him?

I find it reallybfunny and refreshing when everyone is inside waiting for the rain to settle down, while he is standing in the middle of it. Or when I'm coming home really late, and he is still out there freezing cold.
There is no excuse for not doing your best. Life sucks sometimes, but there are no excuses. Just work hard, and laugh at the bad times.
Every time I saw him there, I thought "my day was hard, but I could've worked even harder". At the same time he made me feel better for having a better job, he inspired me not to bitch about any little things.

Then you might ask: "isn't he dumb to stay until 2am even though he is probably not getting any costumers after 11pm?" or "how can someone so unsuccessful be so inspiring?"

Well, I don't know. He just is.
Do almighty, genious people like Steve Jobs inspire me at work? Of course. More than this man? Certainly not.

A lot of the people are complaining about working in inhumane conditions. I want to debunk some bullshit that I think is causing this.

Devs are hard to find. That makes you valuable. A good dev that actually works for 30-40 hours per week is extremely hard to find.
The relationship with your employer / client should be simple: you work, they pay. What you do NOT:
1. Do not take responsibility for other people's decisions
2. Do not internalize other people's problems (you've got your own, better stick to them)
3. Do not let ANYONE guilt trip you into anything that you're not indeed guilty of.
4. Do NOT work for an effective rate that's significantly lower than you know you can get elsewhere.

There are indeed some utterly evil assholes out there that will try to manipulate you, into thinking that you're "part of the project", or that "you're all a team". Yeah, you are, but when it comes to making money, you'll only get the salary, regardless of how successful your work will be. THEY have a motivation to stay up late, to work extra hours, etc. You DO NOT. If you do that, and don't get paid extra, you're working for free, which means that you're not a professional.

Are you a professional? Then have respect for yourself, and bill for every fucking second of your time. Don't let the assholes think they own you.

As a professional, you MUST do EXACTLY what you're paid to do. No more, no less. Well, if you're feeling good about it, then you can do slightly more. And anyone that's demanding more, basically has no respect for you, and doesn't consider you a professional. That is the plain truth. See it as it is, and handle those scumbags accordingly.

someone who thought me about computer when i was a child. someone who thought me machine code, and cobol. someone who thought me about the world. now he is, my dad, hospitalized again (12th times already this year) for cardiac arrest. and today, he is getting better and showing a lot of progress.

This situation thought me again about how life works and how hard can it be. my dad divorced with my mom since i am 3 months old and i've been living with my aunt since. and now he married again with a women with 2 child. i though he was gonna be happy. and apparently not. at the time of the cardiac arrest, his wife don't even want to bother and getting involved if her husband got anything emergency like this, every single thing is thrown at me (or my aunt), from calling the ambulance, paying the hospital and medical bills, accompany my dad, every minor perks, Everything and Always. Once, i reach the point and i'm very angry to her, but my dad always hold me back. and now i don't even want to bother, care, or whatever to his wife again. i just care for my father.

This will temper me more and more, for anyone who searching for your love of your life, please be careful. there is still alot of woman who doesnt have any heart.

Life is hard.

My worst dev sin is not throwing people under the bus, even when they deserve it.

Literally or metaphorically? I'll leave that up to the imagination.

------

I believe my second-worst sin is my tendency towards perfectionism. It's hard to finish projects quickly if everything has to be nearly perfect. I still make deadlines, but this is due to overworking, thus leading to burnout.

I could relax more if only I sacrificed my principles...

If the below is you, please stop. I'm starting a revolution called #AnswerTheQuestion

A: Hey, just checked your code, you have a huge security issue in XYZ, you should really address that.

B: Oh god I had no idea, how do I fix it?

A: Well it depends on how you *want* to fix it, no one solution is always the right one.

B: ... Ok, well could you give me some advice?

A: Well, there are many ways to approach this kind of work, but all I can say is that this way, is definitely not the correct one.

B: ... Ok, well how would you do it?

A: That would depend on the customer requirements.

B: ... the requirements is to have a website that isn't easily hackable, what do I do?

A: Nowadays, its pretty hard to make a website completely not hackable.

B: ALL THE SERVERS ARE SHOWING RED, PLEASE HELP ME!!!

A: ........ you really shouldn't prejudge colours. The colour red doesn't always mean danger, depends purely on the use case.

"Arch Linux is actually not that difficult".

I ssh'ed into my home server yesterday.

I was greeted by a message from an ext3 disk about needing fsck. Fine, "I haven't been in here for a while, might as well do some maintenance". fsck /dev/sda6, let's go!

This nicely "repaired" the sshd service (i.e. cleared the sectors), I cursed at myself for pressing enter at "repair (y)" right before the connection broke.

So I connected a display and keyboard... ok so let's just pacman -Sy sshd or whatever. We can do this! Just check the wiki, shouldn't be that hard!

Wait... pacman has not run since 2010? WAIT IT'S ACTUAL UPTIME IS 9 YEARS??? I guess we know why I'm a DB admin and not devops...

Hmm all the mirrors give timeouts? Oh. The i686 processor architecture isn't even supported anymore...?

4 hours, 11 glasses of cognac, 73 Arch32 wiki/forum pages, 2 attempts at compiling glibc, and 4 kernel panics later: "I think I'll buy a new server".

!dev related but fucking hell I need to get this out.

Could people (including friends) fucking stop to invalidate my favourite music genre?!

'Its just too hard', 'its so aggressive', 'its only boom boom boom'

Fuck you.

Always, al-fucking-ways at every party or wherever when people are allowed to put on music, whenever I'm allowed to, my music is turned off right away.

'Sorry but not everyone likes this and you're not the only one here'

I'm sorry, WHAT? I'VE LISTENED TO STYLES I REALLY FUCKING DON'T LIKE FOR FUCKING HOURS AND I'VE SWALLOWED IT ALL. THEN AT LEAST LET ME PLAY ONE FUCKING SONG ON A WHOLE FUCKING EVENING.

And nothing against metal peoples, really not but its nearly always the metal people who put their music on all evening and keep telling how awesome metal is and the second I mention my genre or out it on: 'oh but that sucks' *switches back to metal*

Go fuck yourselves. I'm swallowing this shit every fucking time but I'm getting fucking sick of this bullshit.

By the way, my favourite genre is raw hardstyle aka rawstyle.

*pops open some Chinese USB Bluetooth dongle*
*finds a chip inside that seems to be a controller*
"Google, what's the datasheet for this thing?"
> Your search - 653uw1f1 - did not match any documents.

I'm doomed... 😟
Finding Easter eggs is hard you say? Try a datasheet 😑

I hope you will forgive me for a third hand story, but I'm one of those evil developers, not a support per se. But I thought you'd enjoy this story anyway. So this happened to a colleague of a colleague:

$Hero - our hero. $Cop - A representative of our hard worked law enforcement agency.

So $Hero is happily speeding along in his car, running a few yellow lights a bit late, etc. Finally, the law catches up to him and pulls him over. Here's how the conversation went:

$Cop: Can I see your driving license, please?

$Hero (with smug grin): Certainly. Here it is, officer.

$Cop takes license back to motorcycle and speaks into radio.

$Hero: It's not going to help you any, though.

$Cop (with no reaction): What do you mean?

$Hero (with wider grin): The server you have to check it against is down.

$Cop (still no reaction): And why do you say that?

$Hero: Because I'm the guy they called to get on site and get it up again.

Our hero did not get a fine this time. Instead he got a police escort to his workplace.

Source: reddit r/talesfromtechsupport

This bitch at work is afraid of hard work and is currently spending more energy fighting the work than just doing it.

She wants to keep a legacy setting that's on the wrong scope -- per merchant, not per payment -- in addition to the setting I've added on the correct scope. She's bringing in management two levels up all because "I've already moved on from this" and "it will require me to write code quite a bit" (first paraphrased for clarity, second is an exact quote)

Bitch, your way is dirty as fuck and is going to break things. Roll up your sleeves and do your damn job!

Recently i had to interview a guy with 10 years of frontend experience for a react developer role

Me : Do you know what ecmascript is ?
Him : Yes
Me : Which version would you prefer to use and why ?
Him : I dont use it. I am more comfortable with JavaScript.
Me : (totally confused) 😶
Him : (trying to be oversmart) I know you young guys prefer to use these fancy frameworks because you dont know how powerful raw javascript is.
Me : (Trying hard to not "react") Ok.

How would you "react" to this ?

Long rant ahead.

Holy shit is this hard.

I'm not a dev, but I'm working really hard to become one. I come home from work every day at 7:00pm and study between 3 and 5 hours of coding, and finally I'm starting to make decent responsive web pages. I got excited, finally the studies are paying off and I guess I got carried away and told a "friend" about it.

"What?, But making web pages its fucking easy anybody can do web pages! I did mine with dreamwiever, is that even considered development"

And there goes my self steem holy shit..I know, I know its not development, Im not a programmer neither do I pretend to be one but holy shit.

I guess I wish some people would anderstand the amount of effort that can go into an app or web..

A lot of people think that the Johnny Depp vs the Sun is just gossip column garbage, but it exposes a harsh truth - a man's life can be ruined just because a woman accused him with 0 evidence, and while she proves to be an unreliable witness on multiple accounts.
Everything that was done to promote equality is being destroyed by cases like that, and I am fairly certain that many male employers will prefer not to employ women, because it's not worth the risk. And for the first time in my life, I can't even blame them.
Working in this industry is hard enough as it is for women, but this sort of shit makes it impossible. Thanks MeToo, for completely losing your mind, and screwing up women and men at the same time!

At an interview, the first round was an online coding round. Two questions, one easy one hard, 90 minutes, easy peasy.

I solved the hard one first.
A bit of good logic, followed MVC pattern, all done. Worked flawlessly.
Submitted code. Online compiler threw up an internal error citing java is an invalid command(jdk not found).
Called the invigilators. What I heard next, I couldn't believe this shit.
"We're not responsible for any errors you may be having. Figure it out yourself"
I was like WTF dude. This is not even a compilation or runtime error!
After a heated discussion, I made him look at the code.
Him - what is all this classes and all? Why haven't you written everything inside the main function?
Me - those are model classes. Those are different helper functions. That is a recursive function to avoid 5 for loops and use divide and conquer. Ever heard of OOP? what kind of person writes a 300 line program inside one function?
Him - no no we write it like that only. Correct this.
Me - I fit everything inside the main function. Still the same error, java not installed. Called the idiot to have a look at it.
Him - yeah your code is wrong.
Me - may I know what's wrong with it? Can you fix it please?
Him - no no we aren't allowed to see the code (he had already read it twice. It was compiling and running perfectly, locally) .
Yeah you solved only 1 problem, you were supposed to solve 2.
Me - yes because the rest of the time I had the pleasure of your company. (It isn't everyday that I see talking buffoons.)

PM: Please get this done by tomorrow. It's just a small change.
Dev: No its not that simple.
PM: Why is it not simple? Please explain so I can understand.
Dev after a hard thought finally explains: blah blah blah
PM: Well, we have promised the client so please do this by tomorrow, thanks.
Dev: *bangwall

It's so fuckin hard to work with people who don't get sarcasm or humour.

The UI guy gives me design (which is a regular design, not something unique)

Me: “wow fresh and unique design (obviously sarcasm).”
Designer: “thanks, I worked on this whole day. Glad you like it.”
Me: “huh...”

Now I feel like a terrible person.

Dear backend dev:
No data is not an error for fuck sake. Don't want 404, or messages if the search criteria filters out all values. Give me a empty array.
Is this hard to understand that we need a team meeting to discuss?
Godamit

Spoke to a programmering student who insists on writing his Java and python code in PARAGRAPH format, like an essay (the teachers do not teach this). Tried to explain why this is a bad idea. He explains to me that if others can't read his code that it is their problem and that he would never make a silly syntax error like missing a semicolon or a bracket. Called me stupid and walked off.

Life will be hard for him.

You know how it is when all your friends know you as the "computer guy".

Friend: Yo, I need this small script for school, can you do it for me?

Me: I don't really...

Friend: Come on, pretty please.

Me: See I...

Friend: I'll pay you good for this.

Me: Oh... What language does it have to be in, Python? JavaScript? Ruby? Perl? I don't know it but it shouldn't be too hard, I can learn it. Bash? Not a fan but it's quite easy. So what is it?

...

Friend: Visual Basic

Me: oh...

This was last week. 2017. A couple of days before 2018. Some schools still teach VB. Not even VB .NET.

(He had about 200 good reasons so I did it anyway. But boy, has that been a chore)

C is not that hard:

void (* (* f[ ]) () ) () declares f to be array of unspecified size, of pointers to functions, which return pointers to functions which return void.

By the way, I am uncomfortable with the fact that I am comfortable with this statement.

I know this is not a dev joke, but I laughed so hard:

Father bought a lie detector that makes "beep" whenever somebody lies around it. The son comes home this afternoon.

Father ask him:
"So, you where at school today, right ?"
Son:"Yeah"
Detector:"Beep."
Son:"OK, OK, I was in a cinema"
Detector:"Beep."
Son:"Alright, I went for a beer with my friends."
Father:"What ?! At your age I would never touch alcohol!"
Detector: "Beep."
Mother laughs:"Ha ha ha, he really is your son!"
Detector: "Beep."

- If I buy x amount of ram | hard drive space | cpu power I will never need more.
- No need for version control | Tests. This is a small project
- git commit -m "changes" (its a small change. I will remember why I did it)
- It is too obvious that I put a lot of personal time in this so my boss will definitely notice!
- Why comment this simple method? Anyone should know what it does. Especially me!
- "this should never happen"
- This call can't be from work. Everyone knows I am on vacation.
- I will back up next week. It's not like it is going to crush today.
- It’s 11:30 already? I will work on this for only a half hour more and then I will definitely go to bed!
- This project will take x amount of time!

If your manager asks for a "rough time estimate" for a project, there is a higher than 99% chance that your answer will be written down and be used in presentations of project roadmap to upper management and/or marketing, who will create a hard deadline based on your rough estimate and communicate this to customers/clients, and then blame you for not keeping the deadline when it turns out (as it always does) that the rough estimate was off by several months because feature creep caused by upper management.

"To use the clock you need Adobe Flash"

Really 1&1? You really need flash to show a fucking clock? Its not that hard to do this in javascript, or? Even if it is an analog clock :D There is even a tutorial of the "quality content page" w3schools about implementing this in javascript ... just whyyyyyyy? it 2018, not 2004.

(1&1 is an german ISP. This message occured in their webmailer using it without flash.)

I had this meeting with this new client and where talking about the possibility to exchange data.

And he told how his company now has everything in the cloud and if we also have it in the cloud it should already be connected since it's both in the cloud.

I tried to explain that because its both in the cloud that does not mean it's connected to each other. We still need to develop a way to exchange data.

On wich I got the answer that our data probably is not in the real cloud.

In the end I just said that we can probably exchange data but it the easiest way to accomplish this is talking to someone who maintain the data in your cloud. And we could adapt our system to theirs.

Sometimes it's hard to communicate with less tech savvy people about tech stuff. Explaining things in a way they understand but also is technical correct.

It's my first week working at shithole.co (can i say that?). My boss is a micromanaging asshole who knows the bare minimum re: programming. He thinks css is hard (no offense). I'm fresh outta college. He expects me to be able to do a very complicated api development through an equally complicated authorization process. Every fucking day "Is it working yet?" [This is my first week on the job]. I don't think he's read the documentation and I don't think he understands how to. As I am typing this out I realize I'm more educated than this dumb ass. Oh, some more context. Our senior dev is working on a more important project So we don't have time to bother him? So I am doing his job for 1/10 the cost. Oh, and i'm not allowed to contact him because he is too important. When the app inevitably crashes and no one knows how to fix it. I will give them my nutsack to swallow (can i say that?).

My GF is a non-tech-savvy linguistics bachelor who uses elementaryOS as her only operating system on her only laptop. I'm not responsible for this, I only helped her install it instead of Windows when she asked me to do so.

She's a living proof that the stereotype of Linux being "too hard" or "exclusively for geeks" is outdated to say the least. Yes, Ubuntu and elementaryOS are not as kewl as Arch and Gentoo, but they are still better than a popular blue-colored American operating system that sends unencrypted screenshots of your desktop to some unknown IP addresses every 10 minutes.

Dear external developer dumbass from hell.
We bought your company under the assumption you had a borderline functioning product and/or dev team. Ideally both

For future reference expect "file path" arguments can contain backslashes and perhaps even the '.' character. It ain't that hard. Maybe try using the damn built in path parsing capabilities every halfway decent programming environment has had since before you figured out how to smash your head against the keyboard hard enough for your shitty excuse of a compiler stops arguing and gives in.

I am fixing your shit by completely removing it with one line of code calling the framework and you better not reject this.
This is not a pull request ITS A GOD DAMN PULL COMMAND.

- Is what i would _like_ to say right now... you know if i wouldn't be promptly fired for doing so :p
How's you guys friday going?

Broken app is broken again. This app is broken so often and so hard, I'm struggling to give a damn.

These fuckers need to take their shitty project, code and managers especially, and launch them into Mars

They blame us and everyone else for their shit and I'm done with it. I need to sleep and not have these fools call me at all fucking hours.

Lecturer I am a TA for said AT LEAST twice that the summaries should be executive summaries. With introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion while explaining the assignment in class.

Notice the plural form of paragraphs. WHY THE HOLY HELL am I grading papers that are a paragraph, or don't progress fluidly. Or look like a 4th grader wrote them instead of a college student about to graduate????

It's not that hard.
And if i have to send one more email repeating the requirements one more time including "yes, i will deduct points for bad grammar" the class is getting DDoSed. Idgaf. This is university, people. You should know this. Can confirm i write executive summaries regularly. Bosses want updates.

Job ad: Must have large amount of experience working in a completely unstructured environment, be hyper innovative and be willing to work HARD and have a PRODUCT MINDSET!

Translation: Management doesn’t know what they want and even if they did they are completely incompetent at communicating what that is. You will be accountable for reading their minds and coming up with something that makes them look good. This task is impossible so you are expected to sacrifice every spare second of your life in vain pretending it is possible. If you do somehow achieve it you will not be given any credit due to your “product mindset”.

I just wrote this piece of code. Without googling. Call me regex king!
But in fact regex is not that hard, you just have to learn the syntax 😄

It doesn't feel good to be average at everything.

Life is depressing

I can't commit to anything hard enough to become the best.

Programming
Singing
Drawing
Story making
Sports

I'm just average.
I feel bad
I feel like I'm a waste of resources.

I'm tired of ranting.
This life is just tiring.
I don't have the patience

I'm average at commitments.
Time management

I see other people code and sing better than me and feel demotivated

I feel like jumping of a cliff cause no matter what I do, there's someone light years ahead of me.

I'm not even unique
Ultimately that's probably what I want.
To be irreplaceable.

I guess in this struggle to be relevant I'm gonna lose myself and if I do get there, I might not be as happy anyways.

So what's the point to all this

I've seen a job vacancy that asks for the following characteristics in a developer:

- extraverted, do'er (as opposed to thinker), out-of-the-box, curious, sees solutions and not problems, structural thinking vs. theoretical thinking, loves change, acts immediately, makes choices under stress, critically questions themselves if things go wrong

What the [censored] kind of programmer is that? Sounds more like a wannabe brogrammer type.

A typical, real programmer is introverted (for he is introspective, detail-minded and is therefore good at inspecting problems and finding solutions for them).

Seeing problems is not a bad thing, it's in fact necessary to be able to identify issues and not act like your typical manager who only wants to rush to solutions. He thinks deeply and theoretically before he takes action. Theory is the foundation of identifying a problem.

What programmer is stress-resistant? It's not normal for the human brain to be able to deal with stress; this is why switch-tasking is so hard.

Question yourself if things go wrong? Perhaps, but this sounds more like trying to shove the blame around.

Since we live in a rigid computer world with rigidly-defined protocols (say, HTTP), it is often useful to think in a conventional way. Out-of-the-box? Sure, if you're being innovative, or sure, as a tangential characteristic.

In my professional opinion, this vacancy reeks of bad corporate culture.. and the biggest alarm bell I find is: "There is free beer!" Err.. yeah. Anyway.

I laughed so hard when I saw this post,i don't know how knowing the Microsoft suite is going to help you become anyone famous worldwide and oh.steve jobs main role was not programming but mostly marketing.

Wow, I'm going to have a hard time remembering this one.

IT have changed after so many years the password criteria for our machines, to the point it's a bit ridiculous.

Like I'm all for securing your accounts and using random passwords but, this is rough.

Minimum of 14 chars
Not the past 6 passwords
Must contain several %}*]=[^{
Must contains numbers
Must contain upper case letters
Must contain Lower case letters
Must not end in a number
Must sacrifice a virgin on every login
Must be changed every 30 days

I’m sick of these kinds of error messages. “Could not be downloaded at this time.” Ok...but why? Are the stars out of alignment? Did the CEO of the company decide that every other Tuesday at noon, you can’t download this app?

How hard is it to give a reason in the error message??

Please allow me to share my thoughts since I can't totally outrage my frustration because we have this so-called fasting to control our anger towards a person we currently disagree with.

A letter from your loving, sincere, pretty and gorgeous working partner to my young, chubby, smart and clever colleague:

Please do cooperate in times of live editing from the FTP since CTO is not and will never be going to appreciate version control since CTO is too tired for giving a shit and just want deliverables be delivered as fuck perfectly regardless of the resources that we have.

As you know, I tolerated you for not getting the freedom of live editing as what you've experienced from your previous team lead. All I ask of you is to get fresh file from FTP whenever we touch the same file because firstly, God knows how frustrating it is how your hard work is going to be replaced and be gone as much as I do. Secondly, I don't want you to experience how pain in the ass could this be in the long run, and lastly, I don't want any hard feelings to be wasted just because of this.

P.S. I'm too shy to send this to you because I don't want to hurt your feelings and don't want to sound too seriouz and feel old. I also hope we share the same telepathic understanding so we can agree with each other.

Your loving, sincere, pretty and gorgeous working partner,
xoxo ❤️

(thinking of stating my first name) 😂

I seear man fucking shit php devs make it hard for people to appreciate the language.
To start, i don't think there is anything wrong with php. As a language I know damn near all of its pitfalls and have successfully deployed huge applications with minimal fuss.

The thing is...this shit seems to happen only when I AM THE MOTHERFUCKER THAT DOES IT

In any other scenario i am constantly cursing the original author under my fucking breath hoping that they choke on their own dicks. Fucking cunts.

Really man, some of the fucking code i have seen. This shit is dangerous as fuck and i can't believe that in 2019 motherfuckers would not have the decency to google for best fucking practices or learn it from a fucking book and shit.

Writing proper php code is not that fucking hard people, every fucking update to the language, every fucking tool that comes out is for the betterment of it.
Guess proper oop or functional paradigms are too complex for some dickheads. Hell, not even top to bottom procedural code.

Fuck me. Good thing is, boss is happy, the entire faculty is happy, the board is happy. Everyone is motherfucking happy.

Dez negroids better remember this shit cuz I just asked for a $20k raise.

I got a raise literally every time i ask for one so this one better make the cut.

Fuck shit php developers man. Y'all don't deserve the language, y'all make the language look bad, y'all make the community look bad.

Fuck you, die and eat a dick. Do all that shit in whatever order you prefer.

For fucks sake, how many times can you get the same error before giving up?

So, there's this form, and it's used quite frequently without fail, and there's this 1 user receiving an error that some data is incorrect, so... they submit the form again, and again, and again, and 6 more times with the same bloody error all because changing 1 fucking field is obviously to hard to recognise as the problem when the error says "you can not have 'x' in field 'y'"

Fuck it, do I need to replace 'x' with a blank, just because you can't read a fucking error message?

A discussion about writing tests for frontend applications.

Context: my frontend coworkers don't write tests, at all. Yeah, really. Our testing process is very manual. We test manually when developing. We test manually when reviewing code. After merging, the application is deployed to a staging server and the design team does a QA Sprint. Lots of manual testing and some bugs still crawl by.

So I decided to start pushing my coworkers to start writing tests. One of the reasons I constantly hear them say to not write tests in the frontend is: "It's not worth the time, because design keeps changing, which means we have to take time to fix the tests. Time that we usually don't have."

I've been thinking about this a lot and it seems to me that this is more related to bad tests than to tests in general.

Tests should not break with design changes (small changes at least). They should test funcionality, not how things look. A form should not break if the submit button's style changes, so why should its tests fail? I also think that tests help save time, as they prevent some back and forth because of bugs.

Writing good tests is the hard part. Tests that cover what's really important and aren't frail and break with things that shouldn't break them. What (and how) should we test? And what shouldn't be tested?

Writing them fast is another hard thing. Are you doing it right if they take more time to write than the actual code?

What do you think about this? Do you write tests for your frontend applications? What do you test? How much time do you spend writing tests? What are your testing tools/frameworks?

covid is making life hard again. I can't just stop in the middle of a research project because I can't access the robots anymore. *makes angry noises* I already canceled a human study because of covid, so this feels super unfair.

but you know what pisses me off even more? the govt complaining about numbers being high but not doing jackshit about active disinfection of air and public spaces (China did that, btw) or providing cheap disposable masks for people.

Also, I'm not as much afraid of getting covid as I am afraid of giving it to the head of the department who is a 70+ yrs old genius in his own right.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.

... This is shit.

Management: Create [totally idiotic and complicated feature, near to impossible to create]
Me: that's close to impossible and could probably destroy some other parts of the application.
Management: well, then your application is poorly programmed.

DAFUQ? HOW DARE TO JUDGE THE QUALITY OF MY CODE WITHOUT EVEN ABLE TO READ 2 LINES OF CSS? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS THIS?

I'm really not easily offended but this sentence hit really hard.

Just wanted to leave a little encouragement that can be hard to find on a 'rant' board: As a 40 year old dev doing this for 16 or more years... I'm not jaded, I still have a burning enthusiasm for software dev, I'm lucky to be able to pursue this career. Have I been in some shitty situations and health damaging levels of stress? Yes at times, and I've ranted about them here. This career isn't an easy ride, ultimately there's a reason it's well paid - for all of its physical ease it's mentally and often emotionally hard. But, I still find the highs match the lows, there's still thrill in the chase to make the project and product work right. Only advice I would give is be prepared to shift down a career gear for a while when you have kids. That shit is hard. Keep having fun people, we work with machines that extend and force-multiply our minds, what a time to be alive!

Why the f*** was the computer industry not able to contract to common line endings? The trouble started many years ago when I was coding scripts on my Windows machine and they were not every time able to run on a Linux machine. Well I then somehow learned on the hard tour that this is due to wrong line endings. Thought that might be the last time I've seen such problems in my career...

And 10 years later I was going to migrate from CVS and SVN to git, and BAM: the f****** line endings appears to be causing much more problems than in all the ten years before. Why? I ask why is this still necessary in 2017 that a dev has to think about the line endings anymore?? This is so 1991!!!

Anyone else has this feeling that every tutorial ever explains basic things in minutae details and then in parts that are actually unintuitive and hard it does not explain anything?

Case in point Angular 1.X

Now, i feel pretty confident with my ng knowledge, but it still looks like there is lack of balance to docs/tuts, it shows up in questions ppl ask on irc etc.
So I don't think it is a question of my subjective viewpoint.

I'm having quite a hard time.

For my studies, I'm doing some research minor atm. And it's basically a 10 hour a week job for me atm. I have literally nothing else to do. No I do not do side projects, I do not aim to be a developer in the future.

This is causing me to sleep about 12hrs each night until it's impossible for me to fall asleep again. I just do not see any point in getting up unless I actually have something planned (meeting bf/friend). It's gotten to the point where I've actually cancelled plans because they didn't give me enough motivation to get up.

Since this is my last year in college, I am also stressing out about what to do next year because I cannot think of anything I enjoy doing.

I am worried abiut my health at this point. Any tips?

Wrote some code that solved a program in a semi unique way for the codebase. As in not oft used functionality of language.

Some time later... This might be hard to understand. Maybe I should do a different way.

Some time later... No, I will leave a comment to describe what is going on.

Some time later... That comment is kind of cryptic. Maybe should rethink.

Some time later... No, if the next dev doesn't know how this works then they should learn how it works. (reasoning here is that the functionality requires a knowledge of internals of language)

Some time later... Also, if nobody else gets this then they have to ask me how it works. Job security?

Some time later... STOP THINKING ABOUT THIS CODE AND MOVE ON!

Rant. (I love and respect all people! Especially developers.)

You frontend imbecils! I just can’t deal with you any more. I’ve had it.

Stop-inventing-new-components-where-there-are-fully-developed-and-working-concepts!

I mean. Just fucking stop! If I see another worthless datetime picker with an ”innovative” design I am going to hunt you down and freaking scream in your face.

And make fucking buttons look like tappable/clickable. It’s not fucking hard! Imbecils.

Oh, ooo, look at me, I am a frontend developer and I am in UX la-la land and what I am doing is sooo hard. Fuck off with your fucking moving gradients and n:th-child childish playground.

”Yeah, I exchanged the spinner…”

Fuck you. Your not contributing. Nobody cares! We’re not doing anything for the business by having a web which can be seen on a fucking telephone. EVERYBODY IS SITTING WITH SEVERAL GIANT MONITORS AND A FUCKING WORKSTATION FOR THIS. NOBODY ASKED FOR IT. AND YOU SPEND COUNTLESS HOURS ON IT.

”Yeah, I made the site work on ipad”

Please. Why? It’s not worth anything. Zero value.

”Yeah, the toggle component is now changed since we started to use the biddle-flipflup lib and it works almost the same”

No! NO! It does not work ”almost” the same. The psychology of the toggle is now wastly different. What was On before now looks like Off and it is fucking worse!!!

Imbecils. I hate you.

And no, I can’t do your fucking work! And I know that you do other non-ui stuff as well sometimes… but anyway… I have no interest to be in that clusterfuck that modern frontend is today. It was really fucking bad twenty years ago and it is just as bad today and you are not helping.

”I’ve improved the button so now it aaaaalmost does not look like a button. But I am getting there!”

Fuck you.

Why do a lot of people on this site get away with typos? I mean, we're supposed to be devs, typos kill us.. From 'postion' instead of 'position', i can do this all day.. i get it, the point is getting the thought across, and, by all means, the thought came across just fine.. it just irks the mind thinking its supposed to be a dev community yet, quite ironically, it is peppered with typos.. dont even wanna get started with the your/you're, the there/their/they're and the than/then.. i mean, how can you not know its proper usage? Is it really that hard? If you can't use it properly, then don't.. if you can't form a sentence without using it, consider not saying/posting and get back to school first..

Imagine an internet where one corner could at least be decent enough to be proficient in the simplest thing: using words..

Languages like python and R are some-what high level languages, with an easy syntax and very readable code. This useful essentially to make it easier for non-programmers to use it. For me as a software developer with +4 years of professional programming. I started with Assembly, Quick-Basic to C++, Java then C#, I found Python super convenient, and at times way too convenient.
At first it felt like I was cheating, and would not consider myself actually writing code, more like pseudo-coding.
After a year or so, I got used to it and it became my default, but it still does not feel right .. is anyone else feeling the same?
I do believe that coding the hard way is not always the right way, but I am just wired that way.

When your team's hard work receive such a mail from the client and still your Project Manager treats you like shit :|

A little back story

Me (hybrid app guy), backend (php api) guy and ui guy (html-css) worked fuckin day and night, to chase the fuckin less than 10 days deadline for this App

We hard to create the App for all 4 platforms including win mobile and blackberry (god bless UI guy and me :|) ~ 2013

Those were the coolest days of our lives , we had a super blast - working (slogging) + drinking + just having fun cursing + not giving fuck to anything and anyone + more drinking..

Cool thing is, our client was in an impression that full backend and front end TEAM is working on this App 😀

This mail still makes us laugh
"professional team" 😁😂

Unfortunately I got paid only half of the salary for next month and left the company shortly
(because official company timing was from 10:00 AM or else half day paycut and I am a night guy, I used to come at around 12:00 noon)

Ok, so our team is responsible for writing an app that consumes an API written by the client's team (I refuse to call it a "REST" API, despite their claims). On one of the clarification meetings we are discussing an endpoint that accepts a (logically) unique field multiple times, even though an entity is already registered in the system with that unique identifier. Our proposal would be that this API of theirs should not happily accept duplicates as many times as there are bits on a 4TB hard drive, rather it should signal an error.

The response we got is this: Due to the Separation of Concerns principle they thought that it should be our app's responsibility to not send a request if an entity with said field is already in the system. Thus there's no need for the backend to validate this.

I didn't hear the next part, because I had to collect my headphones from the other side of the room where they were flung in rage.

So I just lost my job because I wasn't 'working hard enough'.

I'm the hardest working person there, everyone else just stands around and talks, but they don't do anything because they're union members (I'm agency so I'm not) and the union follows up on the smallest things.

That would be bad but not earth shattering if I had savings, was up to date on rent, didn't have the bank and various loan companies hounding me, and I still possessed the will to live, but that's not the case.

I'm sick of this constant barrage of shit that the world is chucking me and I just want to go lie down on the train lines and wait now. Fuck this world and the shit it constantly gives me :'(

Why is it so hard to just build machines that work without all this ideological bullshit? Code doesn't care if politics==true. The world is scary enough without you assholes making modern life a data minefield for even the most educated experts, and taking advantage of the ignorance of everyone else. Fuck you.
I just wanna <look at web pages> without having to consider, counteract, or silently assist some fucking regime. Why is EVERYTHING this way? Everything is a back door or a data mine or a political statement? This isn't a fucking art piece! It's not your espionage tool, fucking codes in invisible ink and tiny cameras and shit everywhere! It's a <web browser>, and if it does ANYTHING besides <browse the web> that I didn't explicitly tell it to do, you better better not be the one who made it. Because if you did, you are what's wrong with the world.

Diving into genetic algorithms right now (its 4 am), am i just a rare specimen or is this not hard at all?

ŁEŊ@#fmęgwjnfčuÆ®ŊÆŁEŊ3ŋ4ħ€3łæŋ€4æł4ħæ4€ħ9æŋ98ł3ħŋ98↓łħ€9“→↓ŋħł93ŋ@38ŁŊ89ÆŁ4ĦŊ08ÆŁĦ093Đ3@09ŋæłęb„guwahęgawęgÆŁ$ĦÆEı$Ŋ(ÆŁ#Ŋ↑(łæ49↓ŋw

AAAAAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna break this laptop in half if I will not get a break from Windows!

I'm running it in a VM and STILL this fucker gets on my nerves SO FUCKING HARD!!!

1. CPU% 100%. Laptop fans are spinning so hard it's ready to take off
2. My hands are on the laptop. THey are HOT from the heat from inside. Hell that's uncomfortable!
3. ctrl+shift+esc to see why is cpu% 100%. It's something called WMI Host something. Kill that mthrfckr!
4. Process respawns immediately and goes up to 100% again. I have already increased handles limitation for that service a few weeks ago. Like 20x more than it was before!
5. website in IE
6. does not seem to be responding
7. hit f5. Nothing happens
8. Hit refrech buttong on the toolbar. Nothing happens
9. Place cursor at the address bar and hit ENTER. Nothing happens.

Meanwhile my hands are burning.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!

What kind of idiotic system is that!! My asshole is a better OS than this piece of SHIT!

AAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#@ŦŊæ¶đ@#ĸogęq j

I'm super pissed. Better keep a 30-40 meters distance from me so the things I throw at you would not hit your ballz!

Now that I come to think of it, the only times I am THAT pissed is the times I am using windows. Srsly.

This happened when I finished highschool.

I was looking for a programming related career at university, and I had two options: Computer systems engineering or Software engineering. I commented this to my mom.

Me: Mom, this university offers Software engineering. The thing is that the campus is 1 hour from the city and it’s a new career, so I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not.
Mom: Why Software engineering? Don’t you want to be a developer?
Me: Yes, that’s why I was thinking of taking Software engineering
...
Mom: Is not “Software” what is inside the computer? (Inside the chasis on desktop computers)

I started laughing so hard 😂 and, of course, I ran away

Sort of !dev

I can't do school anymore. I get so many panic attacks. I was shaking the entire time I was writing my essay today. It's hard to focus when your brain is fucking freaking out. I'm missing deadlines, failing tests left and right.

Real talk, I'm not dumb. This was never a problem. My University fucked me up and now I can't even look at an assignment without an electric feeling and I don't know what to do.

I had a panic attack during the opening crawl of Star Wars. I had to leave the theater. My anxiety is going to give me a heart attack one of these times. I'm 18, why am I experiencing health issues like this?

School isn't done right. How could this be the intended effect?

It's the 21st century. We have this amazing thing called the Internet. It's literally at our finger tips. Any information you want can be found with the tap of a phone screen, and the information will be presented to you in less than a second.

Why is this concept so fucking hard for people to comprehend? Instead of asking me "How do I write a resignation letter?", search the damn internet for resignation letter guides. Like Jesus Christ, it's not that hard of a concept to comprehend. Especially when you've basically grown up with the internet in our lives.

Working on my Google Foo Bar level 4 challenge.

9 days past figuring out how to solve this problem..

And finally reached on a working solution. When started compiling my solution.

And then i Find out, the fucking Google tool is facing some bug and not allowing compilation. Tried hard to do everything but still getting errors...
And after searching on Google just found I'm fucked up.. It's on Google's end and they are not fixing it since so many days..

Just 5 days left to complete.. And i have no idea what should i do...

4 month work just fucked up

What do you think about ageism in the tech industry? I see articles where Facebook/Google pride themselves that their employee median age is not over 30. Why is that of any importance? Is it hard for seasoned developers to find a job or adapt to the "youth culture" in tech companies? Any of you felt bullied by your younger colleagues? Finally, will this change in the next 10 years since developers in their 20s will be approaching their 40s, or once they reach that age they will go to the special developer graveyard and commit harikiri?

FUCK, I just realized something..

A lot of people are probably aware of the statement "Respect is earned, not demanded/given".

Now, if you are aware of the meme "Press F to *pay respect*", you probably know where this goes.

The statements "pay respect" and "respect is earned" are actually connected. Just like money, you pay money to people who deserve it. You work hard for it.

But if this is true, is "attention" also earned? I often hear "Please pay attention" from my teachers back then.

This is some big brain shit right here

It's not that my work is hard. Basically, all the work I do these days is something I've done before with a slight twist on it.

I just feel underappreciated.

"bUt u mAkE sO mUcH mOnEy dO uR jObBbb!!"

How much money I make should not suppress how I feel at a company. Two years without a raise, every company meeting is a circle jerk for the sales team, and whenever our work is mentioned it's "Great job to the PMs for getting this to our clients."

Fuck you guys. Lol. This is a team effort from all sides, but to put engineers last on the "kudos" ladder is just so shitty.

People talk about how they would love to switch to Linux, but cannot, as they claim that gaming lives on Windows. This may have been the case ten years ago but it isn't now.

And further, Microsoft is working hard to break steam, humble, gog, and any other delivery systems they do not control. Such anti-consumer behavior should not be tolerated, let alone rewarded. One result of this is that almost every indie game that comes out now has native Linux support within months, if not on day 1.

The only weak spot is AAA games. But as AAA games and mobile games begin to converge, in terms of the subscription/microtransaction models they're both moving toward, with very few exceptions, I personally don't think I'm really missing anything when I see a Windows-only game for $60 with no Linux support.

And if I really want, I can play un-wine-able Windows games through parsec, though that's getting rarer and rarer all the time.

Not even a beach can prevent a dev from working.

Here I am, six days into vacationing. My girls are playing in the pool behind me, their mother is sunbathing and absolutely rocking a golden bikini, the sun is setting on this magnificent beach and my baby boy is even asleep besides the pool noise.

And dumbshit me is here ignoring it all and frantically typing at my phone because apparently it is VERY HARD to convince your team not to let any projects get stale while you're away.

I should go somewhere without wifi next time.

A Gentoo installation might be fun, but it sure as hell isn't worth it, both in time and effort. Broken audio, broken video, broken stability. A broken kernel that doesn't recognize the hard drive or the network interface. And half a week to compile the fucking thing and it's still not done. This is not the right distribution for me.

So this happened today.
Trying hard not to judge :/

Later the person also said and I quote:

"It is a markup language or what? We had PHP for that."

I'm not much a fan of JavaScript. In fact, I am not very fond of any dynamic language, but JavaScript is one of my least favorites.

But this isn't about that. I use NodeJS for all of my web serving. Why would I do that? Am I a masochist? Yes.

But this isn't about that. I use NodeJS because having the same language on client and server side is something that web has never really seen before, not in this scale. Something I really really love with NodeJS is socket connections. There's no JSON parsing, no annoying conversion of data types. You can get network data and use it AS IS. If you transmit over socket using JSON, as soon as that data arrives on the server, it is available to use. It gets me so hard.

JavaScript is built to be single-threaded, and this is rooted deep into the language. NodeJS knows this isn't gonna work. And while there's still no way to multi-thread, they still try their best and allow certain operations (Usually IO) to run async as if you were using ajax.

With modern versions of the language, the server and client side can share scripts! With the inclusion of the import keyword, for the first time I have ever seen, client and server can use the same fucking code. That is mindblowing.

Syntax is still fluffy and data types are still mushy but the ability to use the same language on both sides is respectable. Can't wait for WebASM to go mainstream and open this opportunity up to more languages!

Ok, im officially at the point where I can say this and I don’t say it lightly.. I’m really unhappy..
It’s hard for me to be happy anyway but being unhappy is not the same as not being happy IMO..

I’m so angry, especially at the western governments but also at the western society for making everything down that we’ve built over hundreds of years..

I’m socially pretty conservative I’d say. I have my values and manners which are very important to me. I try to be kind, diplomatically correct, hard working and honest but people sh!t all over that. Almost on a daily basis people tell me to “just lie”, it’ll solve the problem or to blame someone else.

What happened to work for what you want? And to “Be honest and loyal and it will pay off”? It’s more like the opposite nowadays..

Lie to everyone you can, cheat your way through every conflict and try as hard as you can to be a victim and all will work out…?

My boss had an interview ihr a grad student and she caught him googling stuff, trying to hide it. I told her to not even consider him but she thought he “deserves” another chance..
someone who applies and lies “deserves”??? You don’t DESERVE anything, you EARN it.. if you can’t earn it then sorry but this job is probably not for you.. not to mention that this guys CV was full of crap..

I just wanna find a woman, buy a farm an go off grid for a couple of years 😅 oh wait.. that’s legally not possible in pretty much any European country.

Today somebody claimed they have the "copyright" of responsive websites.

First of all, I'm here for almost a year now, but this is my first rant. Hello guys!
(linuxxx, call me)

This didn't happen to me.

So, it begins like this:
Some client called us and said "[INSERT_COMPANY_NAME] called us and said they have the copyright of all responsive websites, asking money."

I hanged up, laughed hard and visited [INSERT_COMPANY_NAME] website and saw this:

- Each website that uses the solution must report the domain name in order to register it.
- If a company undertakes web site design, it is the company responsibility to inform and record.
- Any unauthorized website will be considered unauthorized and a violation case will be opened.
...

Pricing (Currency Converted to Dollars)
1 Website ~$260
2 - 10 Website ~$1300
...

Well, eventually I reported this to government. I unmasked this fraud.
OR DID I?

Their site is saying this now: "We do not serve this to anyone except government now, you are making nonsense and we do not want nonsense."

So I posted it on a forum, asking what can we do.

We are suing this company now. Yeah, I said "we".

PS: If we cannot win this, I'll get the copyright of subdomains.

Anyone else experiencing moments like 'you sit behind a computer all day, how hard can your job be?' or is it just me?? 🤔
I'm getting tired of this shit... Especially when it's comming from a person who relies ob tonns of apps to do their goddamn job.. :/
I'd get it if it was comming from a farmer who actually has to work hard to produce the food for us.. or any of the blue collars..but from white collars?!? Dafuck?! Yeah, I may not be the person writing the code for your precious little apps, but they're written by people just like me, who sit behind a computer all day & code.. :/
Show some respect ya cunts!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Okay, I'm feeling a bit better now.
How to stop being a lil bitch? Why does it seem like everyone got the "don't give a shit" patch except me? I'm working hard on getting my shit together, I've made MASSIVE progress, but everytime I'm feeling good and confident and ready to take the world head-on, I just kinda crumble again with the slightest mishap. This needs to stop. I'm really trying SO hard not to snap. Fucking hell, being aware of all this makes it even worse! It's like I'm two people, one is a downer and REALLY good in draining my brain power, the other is the guy who's typing this and knows that life shouldn't be taken this seriously, but doesn't stay in the cockpit for too long. I'm extremely tired and mad. I just fucking hate this.

Let’s continue with the last rant.

Sometimes, when I wrote notes to myself that are extremely, extremely secret but I don’t plan to use it for more than a day, I use alef-bet.

I have to admmit I’m a disaster with sofit letters and vowels, and that’s why I don’t make secret and long lasting notes in this alphabet (that actually is not even an alphabet, it’s an abyad).

Well, I guess I have too much deadtime 😂

What I tried to write is “Echar una llamada a las 10:30” (Make a call at 10:30). I hope I didn’t write some stupid stuff instead XD

I’m not jew, but I find this writing interesting 🤔 the most hard way to write I’ve ever tried

I thought any fledgling dev could become a good one with enough team guidance, frequent discussion on ideas and reasoning with seniors, experience, and work variety

But one I know is proving they don't have the knack.

I really wanted to believe anyone could be a good dev if they tried hard enough but this one is just...

They've dragging us down.
Not paid enough to make it my problem to raise it with management. I've tried to help them grow but I've never seen such slow growth despite the different learning/teaching styles *we've* done to improve their capabilities (the entire team)

I dread working with them and I'm not alone apparently

So, this poor fucker right here has spent 3 hours straight trying to install KDE Neon AGAIN, FOR THE 14TH TIME AS OF TIME OF WRITING on an old 0.5TB hard drive with some GiB-wise partitioning size and apparently the disk doesn't like it.

Can someone give me a dildo so I can fuck myself more because life is not fucking me hard enough? No lube needed kthanksbye

Best Hardware support team.
I hope every one of you got such team.

My keyboard was not working properly.
programmer's most used special character ; is auto typing anywhere that is obviously keyboard issue so I called H/W support team.

me: *explained above problem.*
supporter : Ya we know that issue ,YOUR HARD DRIVE IS CORRUPTED. We have 2 option
1) either we can formate your system.
2) We have to change hard drive.
Me thinking : *devrant stuff found*
Me: that is really sad part. How many time you solved such problem?
S: This is my first time in this company ,previously I solved such issue more than 10 time.
Me: you really look smart.
S: thank you,any how I will resolved this issue today.
Me: today I am going earlier but yes we will meet on monday. thank you for quick response.

Qin Chen, a 38 year old facebook employee, recently committed suicide and facebook is trying really hard to hide this.

Apparently he was too stressed out at work and was trying hard to steer things his way, he almost succeeded, but then his manager backstabbed him and left him helpless.

Instead of promoting a better work culture and taking steps against such malpractices at workplace, facebook is trying to hide this incident.

Facebook has to realize that them behaving this way not only insults the departed and his family, but also raises a question that is the life of any of their current employees of any value to facebook, or do they just look at them like workforce and not humans?

Let us not be silent. It was Chen yesterday, it could be any one of us tomorrow.

Making an MVP is hard as hell. It's not even coding that makes it hard, it's knowing when to stop that's so damn difficult. By the time you're ready with something, your brain says "Hey...wouldnt it be great if you added this!" Then you add it, "whoa add this too!"...several days later:
Brain: "The fuck is this, all you needed was that"
😭😭😭

After noticing 4 operations in a single line, I comment a pr stating the line is not simple to read as there are many operations which can be, especially in the eyes of a junior, hard to read.
I proceed to suggest a better solution.

Colleague: “what??? How is this not readable??? Is it [op1], [op2], [op3] or [op4]? 🤷‍♂️”

I kindly explain this person that it’s not about the single operations, but the fact they are all on a line. Inside an object assignment.

Colleague: “you should learn stuff! (4 links to websites giving that snippet of code”

Ah yes, the oldie: “but other people are jumping off a cliff, why don’t WE do it???”

So before the Age of JavaScript, when programming was trying to be an engineering discipline, I felt like we were getting close to figuring out what worked and what didn't. We had rules of thumb (more general than Patterns) and code smells.
Then JavaScript came in and no one had time to think about "engineering" anymore. I'm fine with MVP and small iterations, but the disdain I see for making code clean and extendable and improvable is baffling (and annoying). First-time coders might never have had to fix someone else's code, but two weeks in a chair should have fixed that.
It's not that understanding code is so hard (although it can be); understanding the _intent_ is hard. This MVP is great, but when no one had time to document what is actually supposed to happen, programmers have to reverse-engineer the *design*.

(semi-rant)

The new MacBook Pro's front is NOT metal. It's made out of some plastic despite looking like brush metal.

I learnt this the hard way when i accidentally ran my keys across it and gave it a nasty scratch.

Every time i see it, i feel an irritable itch that i can't scratch.

Luckily, i have the perfect bandage.

Fuck this shit, I'm done, mentally broken. I am trying to setup some basic Java project using buck. Their build times looked super promising and I wanted to migrate my multi module maven project to it.

I am currently working on it for FIVE hours now. And this fucking piece of SHIT doesn't work as I want it to. WTF FACEBOOK, IS IT SO HARD TO WRITE PROPER DOCUMENTATION THAT IS NOT OUT OF DATE?! People warned me, I ignored them. FML.

The time I used to try to get the repo working could have been used to build the project 250 times -.-

Out of the blue this morning... little spaced out.

Open terminal. Navigate to my project.

$ svn update
Command 'svn' not found, but can be installed with:
sudo apt install subversion

The fuck is wrong with me? I haven't used svn in like a solid 10 years. Old habits die hard I guess.

I am this die hard fan of  House, MD. A medical Based Drama TV series.

I find soo many similarity between how doctor House diagnosis patients and how we coders debug code.

Why the flying-fuck is there not a similar show for engineers?

Where engineer is followed closes as he debugs a problem? And saves the day?

Why god why.

I just pray for this miracle to happen.

(To start with Dr.House abused vicodin, we coders abuse caffeine and sudo chmod 777 :P )

Fuck, I only need to hire ONE fullstack developer who fucking knows what he's talking about and not trying to weasel their way into this job. I tell them that there are no annoying managers, no KPI, no bullshit, I thought this is kinda valuable, but no

How hard can it be?

Just switched to Kotlin.. For the first like 10 minutes I was like "What is this shit?!" and then I found Java to Kotlin converter and docs. Yay! Looks like it´s not gonna be that hard to do some apps in it.. Hopefully

newlifenewhope Update No.1 / Day 2

It's so hard to formulate company's Vision and Mission, even rubber ducks is not helpful. I need my vision to be unambiguous. this will take a while to finalize

My Server arrived and not opened yet
The Dozen of rubber ducks is delayed for another 3 days.

So....
I was asked to transfer a spaghetti Android/iOS project to xamarin for a bank client yesterday because "that's what they use".

This is a crm/loyalty app that has been around for 2+ years now (you can imagine the mess). On top of that I have no knowledge of c#, .net or xamarin.

So I ask: "When is this supposed to be delivered?"

Boss: "It was scheduled for 2 weeks ago but let's say 2 weeks from now"

Me: "..... This is a huge remake it won't be even close to ready in 2 weeks"

Boss: "Let's check on the progress in 2 weeks and see how it goes"

Why is it hard for bosses to provide an actual timeframe???

He's been pulling the same crap with junior devs for years and of course they get nervous and create more spaghetti code...

Anyway long story short (not) I have an interview Monday!

Let's hope it's not more of the same!

P.S.: to junior devs: When you are given a deadline... IGNORE IT.

A story from around 2005:

Customer laying out specifications: “We expect this software to need to last 25 years or so, and it will need to keep historical file processing data by dates for at least that long, assume storage is no issue.”

Devs at the time: “look best I can do is support that start with 200 or 201, anything else is really too much to ask. Also understanding how to work with dates at all and not just string manipulation is waaaaayyy hard yo.”

Fuck you lazy motherfuckers. This is why people thought Y2K would be a problem.

Is it so hard to comment your code?

I work on collab projects here and there and both the comments and documentation are both awful, nearly always, there are some exceptions.

This is a plea to all those who teach anyone to program. "This performs a loop" is not a helpful comment, nor is "This sets variable x to 1" where the line below is "let x = 1".

The last piece of code brings me on to my next point meaningful variable names. If x is a variable that stores the age of a machine call it ageOfMachine or age_of_machine. Not aom, not x but what it actually is, modern IDEs and text editors will fill this out for you.

Finally documentation, a good friend of mine sent me this quote a while back, I can't find the image but "Documentation is like sex, when it's good, it's great. But when it's bad it's better than nothing." Your documentation should be good, a good pattern to follow is the Node.js documentation, it tells the function, what it does and what parameters it takes.

Anyway rant over; and I'm sure that this applies to people outside of this community only.

So I recently returned from university and was catching up with people. Then this guy(childhood friend) who is in EE was "asking" me about how my academics were going. So I was describing my cs classes to him until he suddenly interrupted me saying he knows "how algorithms work" and also that IT == CS. I tried my best to explain to him that it is not the same thing, but his ego just couldn't allow me to talk. He continued on forcefully about how he did a project in java that used SQL and blahblahblah. After he was done exhibiting himself, he asked me what languages do you know(LOL)? When I tried to explain to him that cs is not about learning languages, the guy proceeded to interrupt me again and tell me how his curriculum is hard so as to imply that mine is shit. Finally, this human waste told me to "open java" so that he could code, I opened up my terminal, which he responded to by asking me "What is that?"

Being an expatriate, too far from my people..
Being an employee in a sucking company..
Being with responsibilities, husband, soon to be father..

All of this sometimes make me sad and not feeling well

I think life is getting hard for me.

Rant time of 'Derp & Co.'

Today I decided that I am going to find another job, I just can't keep with this shit.

They said that use Agile: FALSE.
• Daily (best scenario) take like 1 hour and a half.
• New task enter the sprint and "Fuck you, more task in the same time". This is something regular done.

• "Oh, dev, we need you to check this other project" I am in the middle of my sprint on this project. "But you have to fix this bug here". (3 fucking days the bloody bug) "You are late again with tasks".

• Meeting for fresh sprint: 6 BLOODY hours... nonstop

The workflow is garbage:
• SOMEONE should did all the devops shit on the first sprint, guess what? They did nothing!, guess now who is being blamed for it (not only me, but a few coworkers).

• Nothing is well designed/defined:
~ task are explained like shit
~ times measured wrongly
~ We are in the last fucking SPRINT and still doing de ER of the DataBase cause Oh, apparently no one has work before with SQL (damn you MongoDB! (Not really)) so I am doing my best, but "jezz dev, this is so hard... maybe we can do it WRONG and easy".
~ No one is capable of take responsability of their mess, they just try to push down the problems. (Remember the devops situatuion? Why is.my fault? I came at the 3 or 4 sprint and I am doing backend tasks, I know nothing about devops).

But the big prize, the last one:
• Apparently you can't send whatever you want to the boss, it has to pass a filter previously of coordinators and managers, hell yeah!

And I am an idiot too!
because I see that we can't reach our schedule and do hours on my spare time!
This is because there are a few good coworkers who probably ended with my unfinished tasks... and they are equaly fucked as me...

This is just the tip of the iceberg. I am not a pro, I am not a full stack developer and still need to learn a lot, but this is just not normal, eight months like this...

Why is it so fucking hard for people to follow basic rules? FFS you're supposed to stay at home to limit contact between people, that doesn't mean you can play volleyball with your friends or go to the local park! And if you decide to go hiking, choose a place where you'll be alone, not the most popular trails around the city! You're the fucking reason government needs to make new quarantine regulations every day, not this virus, and you deserve no help if you catch it! Fuck you!

balancing school work between life and sport and programming is so hard. i mean, school is complete bs. what’s the point?

ffs it’s not *just* that im never gonna use the shit im taught, but that if it dont learn it, im punished. even in some classes (code.org), information that we’re taught is blatantly incorrect. either way, being able to find the foci or an ellipse and the latus rectum (hehe) of a hyperbola isnt going to make it easier when i get my job and just adjust css to my bosses’s specifications. i maintain a 4.0, and i fucking hate it. my friends are working hard, and getting into mit for racial diversity, while im doing just as much work, for what?

i want out. i really do. but this redundant thing called a degree is holding me back. i really want to have some way of proving my skills without a degree. i’m currently building a social media application i believe will take off, but frankly, i dont care.

take off or not, hopefully it will be enough to prove my skills. i’ve been working on this for two weeks now, and, well, that’s my story.

My boss's SQL schema has no foreign keys and he said he left them out intentionally because they should be handled in the application layer and they're a large performance impact.

This is a fresh greenfield project and he's already pre-optimizing for problems we don't have yet, on things that may or not be bottlenecks using ideas (e.g. foreign keys have huge performance costs on mariadb/auora) with no hard data or facts to back them up.

Let's start a new project with some technical debt!

I really despise solving competitive programming problems.

I truly believe it's okay to struggle with them and that people have different abilities. But these kind of problems are an easy way to make you hate yourself and think of yourself less.

I can't solve this problem --> I'm not a good programmer --> I'm not smart enough --> I'm not good enough like my peers who work at FA*G companies, ...

I know these interview problems are a filter and that recruiting is hard and the demand is always high and that they are nothing like the real work but, the reality is, you need to prepare if you want to get into one of the big companies with better perks and maybe better projects.

It is exactly 4 in the morning and instead of sleeping i am crying so hard because the regret of going to college is eating me alive..... I feel like such a wasted fucking potential, a failure who can't provide money for my family in need because i focus studying shit i will never use for over 4 fucking years....... I can not fucking describe how much i regret going to college, i can safely say i would rather go and fucking die than go to fucking college........ Can't even sleep from this fucking bullshit i feel i am wasting my fucking life and losing my fucking mind on this.............

!rant

I aliased the go package manager dep to derp

I do this because I consider myself a grade A derper.

I derp hard when I write in go, not because of not getting the language,on the contrary....I feel quite profficient in it which gives me the ability to derp whilst cosing.

Go is amazing. Such a boring language in the best way possible in terms of syntax but so fun in productivity.

Microservices galore l.

!Devrelated

Just another day , playing fortnite again . Got my wife frustrated over the past few days , once more today she pulled the plug while i was playing on my PC

I can't take it anymore guys , its so hard to get rid of it .

I mean the wife , yeah. Thank god for divorce . Just filed for divorce ! Yep , I didn't think it would be this hard but I found the one for meself and I'm not going to let her go .

Fortnite I mean.

Jus kiddin, But really what the hell is with all this fortnite divorce stuff..
You don't talk about addictions like weed , or alcohol that make people widow their wives or even kill them but somehow this is trending now and the game is the reason!

Fuck you world , for giving birth to humans. This feels like the fucking stone age damn it . Senseless fuckers spreading news like this undermining all the real fuckery going on.

A world where fortnite causing divorce is news and where drug addictions and related murders and deaths are too mainstream is just stupid.

!rant

My project is finally officially launched, it is a though and hard move since it's not yet finished.
Now for the next step, i need to find investors to fund our project. We got our publicity from news media, i hope i can get investors attention.

Nonetheless i'm proud from what i've created. I hope this company last

This is one of the picture from local news post about our launching.

About a year ago a co-scout gave me: an FM radio, a CD cover, tape and some other random bits, and proceded to say.

c-s: Build a metaldetector from this, I don't know how.

me: wat?

c-s: You know computers, right?

me: Yes, but that is not "computers".

c-s: How hard can it be? We need a guide on how to do it in a couple of hours. Good luck.

I don't get it.
I tried Kotlin on Android just for fun, and it doesn't support binary data handling, not even unsigned types until the newest version. Java suffers from the same disease.
How does one parse and process binary data streams on such a high end system? Not everything is highlevel XML or JSON today.

And it's not only an Android issue.
Python has some support for binary data, and it's powerful, but not comfortable.
I tried Ruby, Groovy, TCL, Perl and Lua, and only Lua let's you access data directly without unnecessary overhead.
C# is also akward when it comes to data types less than the processer register width.

How hard can it be to access and manipulate data in its natural and purest form?
Why do the so called modern programming language ignore this simple aspect that is needed on an everyday basis?

I've just got in from bar* work, a little drunk*!

My last dev employer actually offered me my old job back, but as HR are so awful I said the situation was past that and demanded compensation. A nice payout agreed for me, for not taking it to tribunal 👍

Now for the new job! I thought working the night scene would be fun, but it's not well paid and the freelance I have is but it's hard to juggle the two.

I might have a break or a month or so doing this, then look for another job.

Anyone recommend good companies LGBT friendly in London?

I work with a designer who provides me with the mockups of the websites we do where I work. We use Figma, which is a tool similar to Sketch. I do design myself and with this tool is quite easy to mockup sites.

This designer is the worst person I've ever met in terms of document organization. He never organizes the layers of the documents, or even cares to assign names to each layer. It's not that hard with simple designs but when it comes to develop a full website it becomes awful.

I've been asking him politely to organice those documents into layers and groups for almost three years to which he never does.

I'm not able to find the proper words to ask again politely and when I do, he just puts the layers without order into a bunch of groups and calls the job done.

How hard is to be a bit emphatic to your coworkers and spend 5 minutes of your time making their life easier?

Forced to take a "course" on agile. "Course" meaning 6-7 150 minutes sessions of uselss blabber. Fucking hell this is exactly like the worst of college courses.

Such a massive waste of time.

Giving my honest, somewhat filtered opinion in the dev group, I am in the minority it seems.

"But it's such a great opportunity!"
"<MANAGEMENT GUY> really pulled some strings to get us this course and I am fully confident in <MANAGEMENT GUY>'s criteria."

FFS, he's not in this chat. You won't get a raise by brown nosing him this hard you twit.

Separation of concerns is a beautiful thing.

JSX is fucking ugly. Fuck that shit. I hate JSX with a passion.

Here is one. Did you know that the digestive system works really hard to digest the food eaten?

How about we blend all the food before consuming it? Take a blender and add a cup of coffee, add some salad, add a piece of cake, a few slices of pizza, hot sauce and for good measure add some juice, or whatever-you-eat-for-lunch.

After all, all that food is going to get mixed anyway. This is more efficient!

No? Why not? Because it's ugly, highly unappetizing, disgusting even, and it takes away the pleasure of eating, the enjoyment of a good meal.

That in a nutshell is JSX: mashing up everything together under the pretext of efficiency.

Web development not only is an art, but above all must be enjoyable to those who devote their lives to it. And ugly ain't gonna cut it.

I didn't think this were true when I started out programming in the field, but now that I've been working for a few years, I've discovered this:

While your technical expertise does matter, it does not weigh as hard through as how likeable you are; that's right, likeable. You can be an idiot, yet if you make people like you and pull the right strings, people will think you're this grand genius (while you're not!). How perception matters..

Soft skills matter somewhat, but I discovered they can make or break it. I noticed people like to be idiots and frolic around instead of taking things seriously that need to be taken seriously.

Here I am, with my expertise. People don't like me - and it makes them judge me the wrong way, like I'm stupid. Yes, imagine that, you with more skills, being looked at as stupid by idiots with little the fewer skills.

It would be neat if I were valued for my skills, not how much someone likes me!

This industry is... disappointing.

I fucking give up. Typescript is not meant for complex projects. It's meant for simple projects that are big. There's no way forwards, no matter how much I try to simplify my types I simply can not get the typescript server to stop lagging out the moment I do anything complex. It can't fucking do it, it just can't. And that sucks really, really hard.

I'm so tired of finding the ceiling on everything. I had a bad smell for typescript when it came out... and I never should have expected any more than this.

It is not on production anymore, but it was for long enough. Someone thought it would be a great idea to be able to debug a web app while signed in as a user reporting a problem. How to do it? It's easy. Just check on every request if magic HTTP parameter SIGN_IN_AS=id is present and if it is, sign in as this user. Of course, it worked also with admin account with hard-to-guess id=1.

I have used Mac since 2011 and I have made statements about how Windows PCs sucks.
I had to buy a Windows-laptop for engineering school and I have experienced problem after problem after problem.

It took about a month to get the right computer (I ordered online and they missed to add an extra hard drive).

I had to return the second one after 10 days because it was not able to boot.
The third one I had to send to HPs repair place in Poland for a week, because the “X”-button” did not work properly.

I have not used the computer for a couple of weeks and now I was going to create an Android Studio-project and found out that the extra hard drive is missing! (Not physically missing, it does not show up)
When I bought the computer I had to portion the disk, but this time it is not showing up in that tool either...

Worst code review had to be when a senior architect told me that my new library was good, but should be a bunch of files that we copy paste from project to project instead.

His comments were just so out of touch with a) what we were trying to fix with the team. b) basic understanding of good modularized code.

I’m far from a stuck up dev. Not stupid enough to think I’m better than everyone, or have nothing to learn from anyone.

But I totally had a “my boss is a ****ing retard” moment. It was hard to listen to him after this as it was hanging over my head “was I wrong? Or is this just no-library man striking again?”

Today on forgotten games – Vangers.

Even though the game is extremely hard and very, very frustrating, it somehow has an ability to make you obsessed with it. A very complex pieces of information, either carefully crafted or accidentally emerged from the void, delivered straight to your brain, making you an addict. If you play it and not delete it after five minutes, there is no way back – you better get used to new, different you.

There are many hard but addictive games based on simple mechanics, but Vangers is a different story. Compared to Vangers, Dark Souls seems nice, simple and easy casual game.

One can easily imagine "the hardest game possible", but all of them simply makes you delete the game and not to play it at all. Vangers precisely balance over this, achieving a very fragile equilibrium, being hard enough to frustrate you like no other game does, but not hard enough to simply make you quit instantly. While doing so, the game makes you a junkie, addicted to its eerie psychedelic nature.

This game spits in your face. This game makes you a slave, a desperate addict. All of your previous gaming skill, and speedrun experience doesn't matter.

The plot roughly goes like this: humans fucked up while experimenting with portals and accidentally discovered an advanced hivemind race. Trying to escape they fuck up spacetime and the two incompatible civilizations annihilate each other, creating a primal soup of creatures, from which the whole new world emerges. So there are many different strange creatures trying to survive in fucked spacetime where incompatible worlds are forcefully fused together, and you are the Vanger, one of many other Vangers trying to figure out what they are and how they was created.

The game features a voxel, fully-destructible world mapped on a torus. The game lore and terminology are extremely complex, and no one will explain it to you, you have to figure everything out yourself. Skip the dialog and no one will repeat it, you're on your own now.

Every playthrough is different. There are very many game mechanics and play styles available.

Everything in the game including complex rendering engine was written in C and Assembler back in 1998.

There are two types of Vangers players: the ones who was able to escape early and the ones who think that Vangers is the best game of all time. This says it all.

Last warning – DON'T PLAY THIS GAME. You better watch some playthrough on youtube.

Had my junior test at work yesterday, and...oh boy. I don't think I've ever been so stressed in my life.

>inb4 "welcome to the real world kid"

Yeah yeah I know but god damn, this was too much. I heard from seniors that you get used to everyday stress, it comes with the job, but junior test ( aka "stress test") is the breaking point for most "new" arrivals.

The test itself tho is not even that hard. Dealing with so much stress and time pressure for the first time is what gets you. Not knowing what happens if you don't pass certainly doesn't help.

I broke down at one point and even after finishing, going home (got no sleep) and coming back today, that feeling of hopelessness is still there.

No real point to this rant, I just needed to vent

How on earth are there people in their second year of a computer science course who are unable to understand how to read build errors. It's honestly not that hard, just look at the fucking build log and see where the error is and what type of error it is, but yet they don't bother reading the log and say that their "compiler is broken" when their 5 line code won't work.

If this was still first year I'd understand since many of the class didn't have much programming knowledge, but if you're in your second year and you struggle with this (that too for a Hello World script) it looks like you aren't even bothered and just expect the computer to magically understand what you mean.

I spent 4 days working on a new feature of our program. A real pain in the ass! Even did a few hours of overtime.

This morning I go to my boss to tell him about a performance problem I was trying really hard to solve, but couldn't still totally remove...

His answer: "Don't bother with that! Our client is not going to use it. They simply forgot to remove it from their request. So we are going to deliver it so they will have to pay us!"

FFFFFUUUUUUCCCCKKKK!

Not gonna lie. Graduate program has gotten me 100% absolutely miserable. I dunno if it is the institution or what. But shit man. I really don't wanna do it anymore as much as when i started with this institution. Might look into other options, but first class is definitely a pain in the dick. The ammount of hw is too much, the concepts are hard, but my biggest pain: the professor and the teaching assistants. Their accents are out of this world and they just can't speak proper English.

Might go to more....err....caucasian places.

Wooo hoo! I got suspended from reddit!

Never happened before to me (not site wide at least). Apparently for 'report abuse' from some report I must have made like a month ago?

Some user posting in a sub apparently had a theory that a bunch of other subs and other users were in on some conspiracy against them, supposedly sending death threats and 'spreading lies'.... kinda hard to imagine that some subs with thousands (some with millions) of users are all in on this wonky conspiracy against them....

So anyway I report his nasty little post to the local moderators of that sub because it usually is a chill sub and his post is full of insults and so on.

Turns out... that guy is also a mod of the sub I reported him to.

A month later I get suspended from reddit for 'report abuse'... of course I can't see the 'report abuse' (can't see reports...) so how do you even speak intelligently / appeal?

Moderation at scale is hard, but kinda crazy to think someone employed at reddit decided "yeah this crazy guy is right" and does their bidding ...

I used to moderate a busy gaming forum, and sniffing out the crazy folks was part of the job when accepting new moderators. Wasn't that hard...

Granted no big loss here, just a few days.

A little and sweet rant about RANTS! What the hell guys, I can finally think about a social network happily, but I have the feeling that I'm not a part of this awesome community :'( I mean, everyone is getting problem with some clients or whatever. But I'm currently unemployed, and never really get through that kind of problems. Ok they lied to me on the job, ok I paid 15000 euros 2 years of school where there were still people who doesn't care about the work, ok I left my girlfriend, ok I have a fucking hard time to go back to work with that... But all of this is not really juicy, my life is simple and mostly happy :'(
Maybe I should hope that my next job will be with stupid people :o
I love you guys <3

So I have this idea of a potentially amazing idea but I'm so conflicted as to whether or not it is a good idea (I know it will probably never happen) but it's really hard to put it in writing for people's opinions and input on it...

Anyone else have these moments?

My mouses right button kept double clicking. This makes it really hard to play minecraft. It was a cheap logitech mouse from a wireless keyboard/mouse combo. So I went to the store to find a new one. Almost all the wireless mice were gone. Apparently WFH people hit walmart. I didn't want another single wireless mouse. This would mean I need the adapter for the keyboard (for keyboard mouse combo) and the new mouse plugged in. My computer is a laptop so there are not a lot of those slots. So I looked for a bluetooth mouse. Only one there and it was a sucky Razer. I have not liked Razer since they required people to register their software with an account before using their drivers. This really made me avoid this brand like the plague. So I finally settled on a wired gaming mouse. It has a nice long 6ft cord so it works with my setup. It is a G502 Hero. It works really nicely without drivers. I will be testing with drivers tonight. I usually buy el cheapo mice so this is new to me. So far so good.

!Dev

I dislike the idea of therapists. I mean, not the people who study human behaviour to help understand it but the people who try to "fix" another person's problems.

My reason for this is that they're human themselves and I'd say it's pretty obvious that we don't know exactly how the mind works so it's basically like trying to fix an airplane with only half or even less of the blueprints.

The reason I don't like them being human themselves is because we are fallible, you can't guarantee or at least have a extremely high probability of the same prevention or treatment rate as you maybe could with a computer. It's not repeatable. Then again, we don't have the "blueprints" so to speak so it's kind of hard to say.

Your thoughts?

I think the sleep deprived me is finally cracking under the weight of incompetent assholes.

We just launched a major project in some weird cocktail of Agile slapped with MVP and release to the wild in a waterfall, but it was premature, premature in the sense QA hasn't even finished their side of things, but because some fuck with with "manager" in their title decided they have burnt through the budget with incompetence and scrapped an entire element of the project and outsourced just so they could make a shittier version that doesn't even fucking work.

How hard do you want to fail before you will start listening to the people that now have to work around the fucking clock to clean up this horse shit of a mess.

I'm literally arguing over field mapping with multiple 3rd parties, when the fucking requirements state WTF this is suppose to look like. All because they didn't validate or test their own shit.

Why is EVERY FUCKING cock head in this industry a waste of space and cash! Is it really to much to ask for 1 fucking project to fucking go live that actually fucking works where I don't need to work 2 weeks straight (including weekends) after going live just to be sure that what shit does hit the fan isn't going to create a SEV 1 issue...

Sorry, I'm pissed at the incompetence of others I need to deal with on a daily basis. It's not like this field is insanely hard. A little attention to detail and self validation, verification goes a long way. But clearly that's a rarity.

Once this shit is stable and actually works, I'll be pulling out the mop to clean up half this shit just so it actually works.

Oof, I'm getting to old for this bullshit.

we need you to implement some front end components but design department is not following their own standards, and changing the fucking mockup, so now you have to change your shit again

like fuck, how hard can it fucking be to hand me the locked in design and ill make it, i dont wanna have to muck this shit up and fight css again

I don't know why, but in DevRant's weekly rant, I always find a word that I cannot understand. Even google translate is not that helpful in those cases. for this rant, the word is "Procrastination" :-/
Why some English words have to be so terrifyingly hard? These words always make me stay away from writing for the weekly rants :-/

I need to get this out there because you guys and gals are honestly the only people I can vent this to.

I’m working on a program for fun that’ll transfer files over sockets. Nothing too special. But this project is just boring me. I’m not getting any motivation even when I’m getting started. Which didn’t happen last project.

I have a general idea how I’m going to do it but I just can’t sit down and do it because I start overthinking about everything. Like how am I going to do this or that. How am I going to handle feature a, feature b, etc. And I’m just getting a headache and I’m not writing code and I’m JUST FUCKING STARING LIKE AN IDIOT. I don’t even know why it’s not inspiring me because I’ve always wanted to program a file transferring application of some kind and I still do.

I keep doing a bunch of small patches when I work on it and they work and improve it but I am hard on myself because it’s not one big feature or I didn’t work on it for hours. I’m always so fucking hard on myself fuck.

I want to do so much other stuff but I just wanna tough it on through and finish but it’s so uninspired because I don’t even feel like what the final product will feel like others. Like any service that involves transferring files I feel like they don’t function like how I’m thinking they do like I’m trying to make this function.

I feel like everything I’m making is just subpar and not good and I’m trying and I’m trying to improve but I feel like I’m not getting anywhere. And I want to learn a lot of stuff I have shit planned but I can’t get to it because I have to go through uninspired bullshit hell.

Idk

I've worked with few incompetent people till now, but one guy who stands out is my peer who is a "Lead Developer".

First of all he knows nothing!! Even Jon Snow knows something, but this guy knows absolutely nothing. And on top of that he has a hard ass attitude. Never sticks to coding standards, pushes unwanted configuration files to Git, uses too many nested loops even when not even a single one is required.

And when I suggest him something, he starts giving these lame ass reasons and tries to avoid my comments. Then I say, "good luck with that buddy" and move on!!

So I have figured out that Microsoft loves Dungeons & Dragons.

Because there must be some mechanism in visual studio that uses some botched up version of the D&D rule set.

"user clicks a button, computer rolls dice, gets a 6, 6 means you are lucky".

"user clicks another button, Computer rolls dice again, gets a 10, now I crash".

Please remove this feature Microsoft, it is very hard for me to actually get anything done, not to mention getting it done before the deadline.

Today I heard my first "This is a feature, not a bug" from a enterprise which gives us a SaaS.

They were damn serious, and never in my life I wanted to punch an IT guy so hard in the face more than today

Why is it so hard to remember, that devs need an error message if they should help you. just saying "it does not work" is not helping.
I even wrote you a checklist. so f*ing use it! I'm not there to be called every time just to tell you to do something that's already on this list.
Every. F**ing. Time.

!dev

I have this urge to get better at coding and software architecture and design. But fuck me if I'm not lazy about it.
All these crazy good books and lectures and here I am, doing jackshit to improve. Can't even finish my own personal projects. Bah.

I know how I'm supposed to go about it, how to keep engaged in a cycle of personal betterment. I lack self-discipline to do it though... Tried meditation for a time, but haven't really stuck to it. Currently trying to follow stoics (Seneca, Marcus Aurelius and some others), but the mindset is not so easy to adopt, and the practical philosophies even harder.

Oh well. Life is hard. Blah-blah-blah. Thanks for reading. Just wanted to vent, really.

Why for fucks sake can't I motivate myself to finish my thesis?

I mean I guess it is because I already got my third raise in my current (full-time) job because of hard work, which left not much time for side projects (or thesis writing).

On top of that, there is nothing which forces me to finish. My Prof. does not really care. I would probably not earn more because of a higher degree. Only thing is I have to pay the fee for enrolment once a semester.

Also, going back to my thesis project after some time, and having to upgrade all the npm modules in there does not help.

Even though I already have a working backend and proof-of-concept app, something blocks me from finishing all this work.

It is a curse. I would do so many side projects, but I tell myself that I first have to finish my thesis before doing anything else.

It is some kind of loop and I have yet to find the return condition.

5 years of leetcode with no progress. I'm giving up.

First some background, I have an undergraduate degree in computer science and one and a half years of professional coding experience which ended when I got fired for performance issues. I have worked diligently at Leetcode for those 5 years (exceptions occurred when I got ill). I have been personally coached by a google software engineer for months. I have done and given 100s of mock interviews and paid for some to be done by professionals. I have spent 100s if not thousands of hours on Leetcoding and algorithms trying to improve in any way I can imagine. I'm still not good enough.
This all came to a head yesterday when someone on Leetcode made a post about being able to solve every single Leetcode problem in a year within a year while managing a post doc degree and having almost no programming background (link at bottom of post). It made it clear that Leetcode is a game of talent not hard work. The difference between someone like her and someone like me must be noted by the programming community. The majority of people would not ever be able to accomplish that. I dedicated myself for 5 years to Leetcoding almost exclusively and still am no where near what that person has accomplished. I have put in much more work than that person and have gotten much less from it.

I believe the programming community can learn from this contrast. The culture of always trying harder and thinking success stories apply to everyone that is pervasive in programming circles is toxic. The is reality not everyone is lucky enough to be intellectually gifted to succeed and not all hard work pays off. I am proof of that and this is the type of story that needs to be shared and heard too.

I am quitting programming out of humility and recognition of my limitations. It’s ok to give up and wise to do so when you aren't good enough for something.

Ok I need a second post for this week. A tech lead decided to have a one on one meeting with me in public on the clients' floor where he decided to get angry at me (in public mind you) about using too many design patterns and inheritance because that "makes the code too hard to read. Instead use a lot of if-else's like I do." So not just is he an idiot, he did this in public on a floor with people who didn't know programming so now I look awful. I was furious.

Them: You have 6 days to build this frontend page for our wordpress site.
Me: Ok...
*proceeds to spend 4 days trying to arse my way towards a semi reasonable bootstrapped website based on the existing website's styling.*
Me: *Presents website*, so... uh... yeah, I don't usually do frontend stuff, I'm more of a backend dev, but here's what I could do.
Them: This looks like absolute horseshit.
Me: So what do you not like about it?
Them: All of it. It doesn't look anything like the wireframe that I gave you.
Me: Ok... So let me get this straight, you want it to look exactly like how you designed it in your wireframe? *wireframe looks like a child drew it*
Them: Yes! Is that so hard?
Me: I mean, it's a little hard. I'm not exactly a front end developer. Aside from that, I think this design is not very user-friendly.
Them: we don't care about your opinions, OP. Get back in there and make it look exactly like the wireframe.
Me: Ok.
*proceeds to go to fiverr, and contract someone else to do it for me while I get to do fun stuff in the back end.* 😂

----

We'll see what they think of the project when it gets back to me. Wish me luck guys.

I just fucked up!

So I was invited to an afterwork beer because some guy out of our project team left...
I was there early and run into the lead of HR for my current department... (I am still in apprenticeship, last year, so she is not <yet> responsible but if I want to stay she is the one who decides)
I said Hi, and she asks me to sit down.
After a while she asks me (out of the blue) If I want to stay!
I was surprised!!! I am considering multiple options atm .... I was not able to formulate a proper sentence all I could say was a simple "yes"...
... and with all the things going on in my head at this moment it might not have been the most convincing one....
I am screwed! Fuck I worked hard the past three years

How hard can it be to make a calculator app. Apparently Microsoft cannot get it right. You might say hey, but it works already. No it does not. See in math 1-(-1)=2 because the double minus sign cancel each other and turn into a plus. Well the w10 calculator app, just does 1-1=0 and show that this is the result. Yes this is the result of one minus one. This is not the result of one minus minus one. This is basic math .... Stop focusing on the interface and code the base right Microsoft.

They tell me to only review security in the security reviews I'm doing (and if I bring to attention that they're implementing a weak encryption so even though they're not using it at the moment it might cause issues so be careful with that they say to only review security 😵) and then I see this mssql in a where:
AND ISNULL(field, 0) IS NULL
And I think wtf, should I report that? I did and it's a bug and they're thanking me now....
God dammit it's hard to "review security" here...

Dear every app developer or web managers/designers that can read this.

Specificly, the ones who own a android app.

If you have an old android app that is still updated from time to time.

Please, take your time for just one minute.

AND REPLACE YOUR GOD DAMN OLD "Get it on google play" BADGE WITH THE NEW ONE, PLEASE! ITS NOT THAT HARD, WHY ARE YOU GUYS NEVER UPDATE TO NEW LOGOS?!

NOT JUST OLD APPS, EVEN SOME BEW STARTUPS ARE ACTUALLY USING THE OLD BADGE, WHY OH DEAR GOD WHY! WERE YOU LIVING UNDER ECLIPSE ROCK OR SOMETHING?!?

You will get far more rejections than acceptance. A lot of the time it has more to do with the interviewer and not the candidate (assuming the candidate is a genuine hard worker). The job search process is similar in this regard to finding a mate or compiling your code.

Keep moving forward!

Did anyone else grow up using shitty laptops and cheap hard disks with just not enough space and now that they are adulting and have access to money, have this random, uncontrollable urge to keep buying more SSD's even though they already have more than they'll ever need or is it just me?

Nothing IN THIS WORLD drives me CRAZIER than you giving me a wireframe or design that is not mobile first! And not even designing to the smallest phone size either! HOW HARD IS IT TO DESIGN MOBILE FRICKIN FIRST

what the fk how hard can it be to have a working version of the software on the master/ ros-version branch? Why is this thing always broken?! HOW?!

Had to update today unfortunately, and man, I have been "installing" this shit for over 3 hours now. Use the .install they said. It will be fast they said. Ye sure, my ass. The Dependencies are broken and incomplete as always and the tutorial is not up to date. Big suprise. I get it, it's a lot of work to keep these things up to date. But please if they are this broken and incomplete why are they released in the first place.
And then they wonder why I don't manage to do my work on time. Yeah, cause I'm stuck debugging this shit <.<'

I have this colleague that who is nice, but if you mention anything about (not complete) java, sun, vmware, windows, daus(dumbest possible user), car manufacturer your ears bleed with is rants about it.
For example:
We talked about BMW which published that the energy generated from recuperation of one of their cars is around 60%. Immediatly he rants that it its not possible and the calculated number of an forum user of the newssite who calculated that 90% of the kinetic energy is regenerated has no idea about the problems.

Sometimes its hard to endure the hate, but i can relate with him in some things.

College days
Me and my friend sitting in Lab

Me - Dude I am not able to install simulator in this PC, it's asking for some password
Friend - Try typing random password, admin123, admin000, admin0, admin etc.
Me: (After 10+ attempts) Not working :(
Friend: (Saying to faculty) Mam what's the password for this PC, I need to install simulator.
Mam: Wait, Computer specialist will come and do it for you

** Waiting for 10 min **

Specialist came and starts installing it one by one. After 3 min

Specialist: (After realizing that he can't install it for all 50+ PC's)
Everyone select Administrator account, and press enter, then you will be able to download it.

Me and my friend staring at each other laughing so hard ... !

After 1 month, the password is still same :P
Fun fact: It is Technical Campus.

Why does noone implement autoupdater, especialy on linux side? Is there a reason i dont get? Sure, most system stuff is better in apt, but if i install servers, i do not want to wait for these stupid linux release timings! If it were hard, id understand. But most of this is possible with something like GitHub API and 20 Minutes of time. I mean, yeah backwards compatibility and what not, but then handle that internaly.

Example: I use dnsmasq on a raspberry pi. RPI is running raspbian. Raspian is debian 8. Debian 8 has a version of dnsmasq with a pretty annoying bug, which prevents me from using dnssec, as i cant open any cloudflare pages. Why, o why isnt this updated at MY will? Then, if it isnt, why is it so impossible hard to compile this myself, no docs for that, no binaries, NOTHING? Dear server devs, please add atleast basic autoupdate functionality without having to rely on the base os.

Or, give me easily deployable binaries, if you cant write something integrated.

So I just found out the hard way, that you can't take screenshots, which is great if you want to enforce privacy, but not so great if you want to treasure some of the most awesome comments you find in this community.

Is there a possibility to add a feature like favorite comments?

I am looking for a job. Ok, alright. This woman calls me with her phone. After a bit of a coordination effort, she proceeds to give me the most pyramid scheme speech that could pyramid scheme. And she said I was fucking chosen because of my IT knowledge... Which I feel fucking insulted about.

This is not my first time brushing against pyramid schemes. Oriflame, if you've heard of it, is another one of the pyramid schemes that, confusingly enough, has product.

But my whole point is, they literally hunted me down because of my age, asked about my goddamn zodiac sign which is always a really good sign (/s), asked me shit like if I have children etc. Like, really. And left no space not to answer most of these.

The whole pyramid scheme industry is basically marketing itself to usually stay-at-home moms, promises an opportunity, etc and they are hard to weed out because they are making their way to normal job hunting websites. Which is how I ran into my first one.

I feel insulted that they'd do this stuff to me but here we are. At least I get the choice of blocking and maybe reporting.

But it really discourages me that that is how things are...

I gave a technical interview today and here is summary how it went . interviewer asked me to login to leetcode account then .

Interviewer :- "Open this problem( he gave link) and open submission section".

Me :- "Yes sir" I opened it and I have solved that in past .

Interviewer :- "okay so you have solved this one so let's move to next question(2nd)".

I opened it and again I have already solved that in past. Then he gave 3rd and it was also solved by me already .

Then he said " Okay now I will share with you this problem which you have not solved and I am sure ".

He gave me a hard problem which I actually haven't solved . I would have solved the first 3 , the 4th one was actually hard and I was not able to optimise my code on time .

sometimes life is really tough 😪. he could have asked anyone of them 😕.

"It works when i compile it on my personal PC, but not when built on the server so the bug cant does not exist"

It is very hard to like this developer..

//your friendly integration tester

After playing et and wow a few year it all started when I hosted my own ts2 server with npo license. Rented a server for 90 bucks as a highschool student (13) with no job. (Who the fuck rented to me? I had my own bank account and lied about my age. Had a credit card at 14 but that's another story)

*Shit is expensive*

How does one get some value out of a server? Oh right, let's host Webspace and ftp accounts.

That got me into server administration and bash.

After dropping wow in bc i started playing on private servers.

*Shit is buggy*

How do you fix wow server? Let's learn c++ and push patches to arcemu. Why is this part crashing on this one server? Let's look at the binary. Wtf is this? Oh assembler?!? Ok let's try to read this. Ok I get it now. Let's fix the code.

Ok let's host my own wow private server. We need a website for account creation.
Let's learn php. Wait php is easy compared to mastering c++? I need an app for my first smartphone (iPhone 3g) to manage the server on the go. Let's learn how to do that. Why is this so easy? Switching to Android: wait java is even easier?

And that's how I learned that if you start with the hard part and grasp the concept, everything more abstract is significantly easier. If you start to read code to learn any language it's easier then following books (for me at least). If you get an error, track it down, you might learn amazing things in the way.

And if you want to get into reverse engineering, start by being passionate for the thing you want the reverse. It will be hard before it gets easier and you will need all the willpower you can muster not the just stop.

Programming for me is not a job but my passion. It's like I'm on vacation every day of the year (expect meetings, fuck meetings)

With a nice cup of coffee, you start earlier than your colleagues, you do the hard part that everyone is afraid to touch.
But there is always someone who starts late his day and leave usually the first with a stupid smile.

I'm not the manager, so it's not my responsibility to control this person, I admit seeing this affects my motivation but I don't need to have his load on my plate.

I know that this case is quite common but I needed to rant about it.

#do_your_work_bob

Today I want to put an age-old question to rest. What is art and what is not? What's the difference? In art world, there is actually a consensus that was reached in the second half of 20th century.

First, the audience has no merit to decide what's art and what's not, as art has inherent characteristics. So whether a piece is art or not is left for the artist to decide.

But the artist too cannot just call anything they make art. There is just one criterion — if only the art piece itself is enough to justify its making, and the artist sees it as the only award they need for making it, it's art. Otherwise, it's not.

"But wait, that's not entirely correct, this is incomplete", you say. Well, it's in fact complete, but because our society progressed way faster than our languages, we're having a hard time to describe novel complex things with words. Language can't keep up with rising complexity.

We use "horseless carriages" instead of "cars" when we describe anything complex enough. The good explanation of how language works and why do we act like this is outlined beautifully in Benjamin Bratton's "The New Normal". A small book of forty-something pages, but I never spent that much time on every page in my life. The best book investment for me after "The Code Complete".

Couldn't sleep this morning, so at 6am I tried to tackle the bug that gave me a hard time yesterday... at 10am I found the bug, and so I remembered the number one rule when coding.

KISS? Nope.

The number one rule is that your past self is dumb and he probably created the bug in the easy part of the code... you know, the one you didn't even check because of-course-the-bug-cannot-be-there-Im-not-stupid.

anyone else ever focused so hard/long that they peeled an orange(mandarin) to eat, then forgot to eat it so long that it was crispy?

i mean like literally the thin skin remaining was actually crispy... this is me taking a break to remember last times i ate/etc... and hopefully not have more crispy oranges... though tbh wasnt bad

Wtf is happening to tech security... Last 4 months

All WiFi is now crackable. .. in short amount of time
Windows . . Annihilated with this new bug might not be fixable... and work back on all of them
iPhones cracked ...
Linux dirty cow ...
Android been suffering.
And everyone knows Mac's security is joke ...
Finger prints ... Made pointless on everything.

Literally all going to shit .. 😐

And I know how to do all this... It's all out in the open not even hard to find

After all the rants I've written on this topic, no, no, fuck no. I ain't answering jackshit. The trauma is very real. I'm trying to not have a panic attack just remembering few of the times I've lost work, personal data, side projects, accounts, you name it.
Oh dear God it's hard to breathe...